Emma Walker

Justin Timberlake

Trace Ayala

Jules Allen

Cooper Henson

Max Wyler

All Images Taken From A Google Image Search

"Can I buy you a drink?"
    

"No." I reply stiffly, not bothering to turn and look at the man who has taken up residence behind me.     

"Sure about that?"    

"Positive."    

"What if I told you... I could buy you this whole fucking bar if I wanted to."    

"I'd tell you that I'm not interested in owning a bar."    

"You know... this hard to get shit really isn't a turn on."    

"So, leave."    

"Most girls would have wet themselves if I offered to buy them a drink."    

"Good for them."    

"C'mon girl... you can't really be this much of a cold hearted bitch."    

"Oh ye of little faith." I chuckle and roll my eyes before sliding off of my barstool and forcing myself into the crowd, away from the source of my irritation.     

Why can't men just get the fucking hint sometimes?

"It's a proven fact. Guys will always go for the slutty looking one, no matter how much prettier the friend is. If she looks like a prude... they won't even give her a second glance." Cooper smiles proudly, having just watched a drunken frat boy prove his theory.    

"Alright, but what if the slutty one is deformed or something?"    

"Doesn't matter. The one eyed snake can't see. Plus, beauty is only a light switch away."    

"You're horrible." Jules laughs and rolls her eyes.    

Welcome to my life folks.    

Every night after work, my friends and I plant ourselves at our favorite bar, and people watch.     

It's sometimes a little boring and fairly weird, but we're not exactly normal to begin with. We're rude and cynical and pretty damn funny, if I do say so myself.    

Most people would probably call us assholes, and have on several occasions, but we have fun and that's all that matters.     

"So... we meet again." I hear that unfortunately familiar voice behind me and can't stop the eye roll that follows it.    

Three nights in a row, this moron has made numerous attempts at shamelessly flirting with me, and three nights in a row... I've shot him down.     

Why?    

Number one, he's far too arrogant for my liking. He knows just how good looking he is, and he's not afraid to let everyone know it.     

Secondly, I'm just plain old not interested.    

Night after night, I watch men pick up women in this bar and it never fails to turn my stomach. I'm all for having a good time, but there's just something about hooking up with someone you meet in a bar that seems so... sleazy, I guess is the right word.    

And this place ain't exactly four star, if you catch my drift. The paint is peeling off the walls, the floor is covered in a layer of dirt and spilled liquor. Several of the barstools and tables are damn near falling apart, and the distinct smell of tobacco is practically engrained on every surface.    

To put it nicely, the place is a dive.    

The clientele are all fairly middle to lower class, but when you're trying to avoid the uppity, typical New Yorkers, this is the perfect place to be. And that's exactly why we come here. We spend enough time with the high society bitches who come into our store, we don't need them in our free time as well.    

Plus, there's a fight atleast four nights a week, and there's nothing funnier than a good old fashioned bar brawl.    

"Great. I'm jumping for joy." I smile sarcastically as he moves to stand between Jules and I.    

I really wish he'd just get the hint. I mean, I've been as clear as I could possibly be. I told him I wasn't interested. I told him I don't let men in bars pick me up. I've even resorted to some fairly creative excuses. But, he always seems to have a come back.    

I trotted out the usual boyfriend line, didn't phase him. Told him I was a lesbian, he asked if he could watch. When I told him I had several STD's, he promised to wear a condom. I even told him I only had a week to live, he offered to make it the best week of my short life.    

Nothing deters this guy.     

So, either he's incredibly persistent, or really fucking stupid. I haven't quite figured out which one yet, but I'll take an educated guess and assume it's the latter. He just doesn't get it.   

 After my last relationship ended horribly, I swore off all men for awhile. I was racking up one mistake after another and I've just gotten tired of even trying anymore.     

Men are scum. Plain and simple. They're a complete waste of time and are usually only after an easy fuck, so what's the point in stressing over them? I've learned my lesson the hard way many times, and I've finally figured it out.    

The easiest way to avoid getting hurt is to steer clear of every last one of them.    

If I end up alone because of that attitude, so be it. Atleast I won't be left alone, picking up the pieces of my broken heart time and time again.    

"You should be." He grins and takes a sip of his beer. "I don't chase after the same girl too often."    

"Oh, so I'm a special case? Fantastic."    

"Course you are. I wouldn't be here if you weren't." He winks.    

He actually has the nerve to fucking wink at me? Ugh.    

"So...the bar's closing soon." He states plainly. He's trying to sound nonchalant, but I know exactly what he's implying, and it's not happening.    

"I'm not going home with you."    

"What do I gotta do to make that happen?"    

Jules and Cooper try to cover their laughter by coughing and all I can do is roll my eyes. If Cooper was such a good friend, he'd jump in right about now and play the boyfriend card. But, there he sits, watching me suffer sexual harassment from a pop-star.    

Oh yeah...guess I forgot to mention that little gem, didn't I?    

It's true. The jackass who's been incessantly hitting on me is the one and only, Justin Timberlake.    

Bet you never would have guessed that, huh? It shocked the hell out of me the first time too. I didn't expect someone so famous to be so.... desperate and lame.    

You'd think, a man like Justin would be the prey. You'd think women would be throwing themselves at him, and I'm sure they have been, but for some reason... he's only interested in tormenting the shit out of me.     

Honestly, I don't understand it. I'm really nothing special, and I haven't exactly been nice to him. The guy could probably have just about any chick on the planet, but he insists on chasing the one who isn't interested.    

It doesn't make a lick of sense.    

"You really wanna know?" I smirk as his eyes light up. If I'm going to be harassed, I might as well have some fun with it. Right?    

"What do you think?"    

"Alright... guess you'll have to ask my boyfriend here." I shrug and shoot a quick glance at Cooper.    

Justin's eyes widen as his gaze settles on Cooper. I don't know if he's intimidated, or shocked. But either one will work in my favor, and maybe...just maybe, he'll leave me the hell alone.    

Honestly, I'd probably die laughing if anybody was intimidated by Coop. He's scrawny as all hell, and probably more woman than me or Jules will ever be.    

"Funny Em... when did you grow a penis?" Cooper asks lightly, a wicked smirk planted on his face.    

"Ha! Fucking knew it!" Justin shouts proudly and slams his hand down on the table. "I was waiting for you to tell me this was your man. You barely even have to look at him to know he's gay."    

"You fucking queen." I mutter and slap Cooper's shoulder, before returning my attention to my newly acquired stalker. "Fine... you caught me. Look, Justin...this whole thing is flattering, really. But I'm just..."    

"Not interested." He finishes for me and nods. "You've mentioned that. Unfortunately for you...I don't take no for an answer. And, you better believe I'm gonna turn that no into a yes...eventually. Y'all get home safe." He shoots me one last smile and saunters off into the crowd.     

He's determined, I'll give him that much.   

But, this girl is not easily swayed.     

Hell will freeze over, pigs will fly, and worms will grow ears before he gets a yes from me.

I love my friends. I really do.    

But, there are times where I wonder why the hell I keep them around.    

This is one of those times.

She grabs the yellow bottle
She likes the way it hits her lips
She gets to the bottom
It sends her on a trip so right
She might be goin' home with me tonight

She looks like a model
Except she's got a little more ass
Don't even bother
Unless you've got that thing she likes
I hope she's goin' home with me tonight    

"What the hell is this crap?" I ask as I toss my bag onto the counter.    

Every day, I come into work,  and Cooper has music blaring throughout the store. 90 percent of the time, it's some bass heavy techno crap that he thinks is fantastic. Or, there's some indie rock band that Jules is obsessing over for the moment, pouring from the speakers.    

The days that I actually have the privilege of picking the music, you're probably going to hear various hits of the 80's. What can I say? I'm a vintage type of girl.    

However, I can't even begin to guess which one of them picked the nonsense that's booming from the stereo today, but I know why they're playing it. And I'm not even slightly amused.

Those flashing lights come from everywhere
The way they hit her I had to stop and stare
She's got me love stoned
Man I swear she's bad and she knows
I think that she knows
    

"You mean you don't know?" Cooper grins and hops up on the back counter. "We picked it just for you."        

"Turn it off." I mutter before I grab a box of new polo shirts and begin folding them.    

"It's actually pretty good." Jules laughs at the scowl on my face and continues bobbing her head along with the beat.    

"I don't care if it's the greatest album known to man. Turn it off."    

I know you probably think I'm insane.    

Most women would be shitting themselves if a pop-star was aggressively pursuing them. But frankly, it's become pretty damn annoying.    

Especially since he is everywhere. I can't turn on my radio or TV without seeing or hearing something about him. It's like, no matter what I do... I can't escape him.     

And those jackasses I call my friends aren't helping matters either. They're both incredibly amused by the whole thing and are constantly finding various ways to torture me.    

Just yesterday, I came home from work to find a very large poster of a shirtless Justin hanging above my bed.     

I bet you can guess how funny I thought that was.    

And today, they're blaring his music as loud as humanly possible, and laughing their asses off at my irritation.    

Now do you see why I need new friends?    

They both seem to think that my refusal of Justin's advances is a sure sign that I've completely lost my mind.    

I mean, ok fine... he is attractive, but that's pretty easy to overlook when you consider the fact that he's beyond arrogant. No level headed man says the kind of shit Justin does.     

He's got this idea stuck in his head that I'm turning him down, simply because I like the attention. Honestly, he couldn't be more off base if he tried.     

Colin Farrell could walk in here right now, profess his undying love for me and get down on one knee, and I'd turn him down too.    

I just don't want or need to be involved with anyone right now. And, even if I was in the market for a man, it most certainly wouldn't be Justin.    

You know how sometimes you meet someone and you just know that you wouldn't like them? That's exactly how I feel about Justin. And with all of his stupid pick up lines and shameless flirting, he's just proving me right.    

He's just so... pathetic. I mean, only an incredibly desperate loser would keep coming back like that. The only thing I can figure is, maybe he's just not used to being shot down, and his ego refuses to let it happen.    

Unfortunately for him, he's in for a big fucking reality check, cause it's not going to happen.    

The doors to the shop swing open, and I have to bite my tongue to contain my giggles at the sight of the two hulking black men who just walked in. They're both dressed in black jeans and t-shirts, and look like they're ready to tear apart the first person who even looks at them funny.    

I really try to not make fun of the customers, but sometimes, it's impossible not to. We get some pretty wild characters in here, and I'd never get anything done if I commented on everyone who passes through those doors.    

Upper Manhattan is full of weirdos, everybody knows that. Which I guess, is why Cooper picked this location.    

Apparently, his main goal in life has always been to have his own clothing line and store. His parents put him through school and once he graduated, he started designing clothes. When the parentals saw just how talented he was, they put up the money and bought him the store.    

He still has a way to go, but he's making a pretty good name for himself.    

Now, here's where two plainly dressed giants coming into the store looks a bit odd.    

Everything Coop designs is supposed to be super trendy and catered to the socialites of New York. So, exactly what the hell are these two doing here?    

"One of y'all Cooper Henson?" The larger of the two asks as he eyes the three of us suspiciously.    

"That'd be me." Cooper smiles as he quickly jumps off the counter and extends his hand to them. "What can I do for you gentlemen?"        

"We'd like to speak with you..... outside." The other man says gruffly, pausing to shoot Jules and I a disdainful glare.    

"Is there some kind of problem?"    

"Outside." The larger man nods and the two of them head for the door, Cooper trailing reluctantly behind them.   

Have I mentioned that Cooper is a fucking idiot? Seriously, who in their right mind follows orders from complete strangers?    

Oh God, what if they're bookies or something? What if Cooper had some tie to the mob?    

Holy hell, they're gonna kill us all.    

While I'm freaking out, Jules doesn't seem the least bit phased.  But then again, the world could blow up around her and she'd probably just shrug her shoulders and light a cigarette.    

Like Cooper, Jules has had a pretty much free ride all of her life. Honestly, she doesn't even need this job. Her dad is in real estate and has made a fucking  fortune. I'm sure you can assume that Jules has quite the trust fund.    

I don't mean to sound like I'm judging them, because I'm not. But, it'd be nice to have even half the help they do.     

Unfortunately, I've been paying my own way since the day I turned 18.    

Cooper finally re-enters the store and quickly starts pulling down the shades.

"Em, can you go lock the backdoor?"    

"Umm... why?"    

"We've gotta shut down for awhile. Celebrity." He says simply.    

I don't mean to sound like a brat or anything,  but I really fucking hate when famous people come here. They always demand that we put the store on lock down so they can browse for God knows how long.    

Now, when they spend an insane amount of money, it's not so bad. But, when they come in and don't spend a single dime, it's a little irritating.    

Several months ago, Paris Hilton came in and we had to shut down for damn near four hours while she pawed through every rack and tried on half the shit in the store.    

And what did she buy, you ask?    

A fucking two dollar hair clip.    

Naturally, Cooper was beyond livid.    

Honestly, I think it's a power thing. They like knowing they can close a business on a whim. Never mind the fact that the place is losing money just so they can fuel their ego.    

The two mountains disguised as men return, this time with two other men behind them. One is fairly short and the other has to be a good six feet tall.    

Fucking hell.    

Jules scrambles to the stereo and shuts it off as the taller of the two saunters up to the counter and leans against it, his usual smirk in place.    

"Just can't get enough of me, can you? I'd be happy to autograph that if ya want."    

"The first night at the bar was more than enough. Thanks." I smile sarcastically at him and he chuckles softly.    

"So... I didn't know you worked here."    

"Probably because I haven't told you anything about myself. And now... you officially know way too much."    

"Aww... what's with the hostility Emma?"    

"What's with the stalking and sexual harassment Justin?" I mock his sickeningly sweet tone and smile a little when a frown quickly takes over his features.    

"Why are you such a bitch?"        

"She has a chemical imbalance!" Cooper chimes in. "So... anything particular you're looking for?"    

"Nah, not really." Justin shrugs as his eyes scan the store.    

"Alright, well... holler at me if you need anything."    

"J... check this out man!" Justin's small companion calls out. He gives me the once over before joining his friend on the other side of the building, completely ignoring me for the first time since the day we met.     

"Why won't you just go out with him?" Jules asks suddenly.     

"Because he's an ass." I reply and go back to my folding.    

"Well... his fine ass likes you."    

"No Jules, he doesn't. He wants to sleep with me. Big difference."    

"So? Bang him. He's not bad to look at, and all those tabloids say he's got some pretty damn good equipment." She giggles as she holds her hands several inches apart. "You haven't gotten laid since Andrew. It might loosen ya up."    

"Andrew who?" I ask through gritted teeth.    

"Oh right." She rolls her eyes and sighs. "We don't talk about Andrew." She mutters before disappearing into the back of the store.    

Yeah, I definitely need new friends.

*******************    

"One drink. That's all I'm asking." I roll my eyes and quickly turn my barstool away from him. Jules arches her eyebrows at me, silently asking why I'm being such a cold hearted witch.     

I thought after the incident at the store this morning, that I was rid of his pesty ass once and for all. He and his entourage meandered around for an hour or so before he finally picked out a few shirts, paid, and left. He didn't say a word and I figured the reality of our situation had at last settled into that thick skull of his.    

Turns out.... I was wrong.    

I spotted him as soon as we walked into the bar and he's spent the last 45 minutes following me around and practically begging to buy me a drink. He's got another thing coming if he thinks the key to his success is getting me plastered.    

I really just do not understand any of this. I mean, what the hell is it gonna take to get through to him?    

I feel him grip the back of my seat and he quickly spins me around to face him.    

"What is your freaking deal? I said no." I yell over the pounding music, fully expecting him to get pissed and call me a bitch like he did this morning. Instead, he smiles and shakes his head.    

"I like you Emma. I don't know why you think that's so horrible."    

"I don't. It's just... I've told you a thousand times... I'm not fucking interested! Why don't you understand that?"    

"I understand perfectly." He smirks and places a hand on my knee. "I just don't care."    

His thumb begins to rub slow circles over the inside of my knee, and when his hand starts to slowly inch it's way up my thigh, I can't help but roll my eyes. This is getting ridiculous.    

"One drink." He repeats, and smiles as I slap his wandering hand off of my leg. I let out a loud sigh and nod reluctantly.    

I guess one drink won't kill me. And... maybe he'll see that I'm completely dull and leave me the hell alone. I doubt it, but a girl can dream, right?"    

"What'll it be?" He asks, a triumphant smile planted on his face.    

"Rum and coke." I mutter before he turns toward the bar. Within seconds, a fresh drink is placed in front of me and I nod my thanks to the bartender.    

"So..." Justin trails off as he casually leans against the bar. "You always lived in New York?"    

"Yep."    

"Are you in school or anything?"    

"Nope."    

"Come on Emma... work with me a little here."    

I almost want to laugh at the frustrated look on his face. I know I'm being mean, but hey... he asked to buy me a drink, not strike up a conversation. I'm only doing what he asked.    

I'm petty, I know.    

"So, exactly why aren't you interested in me?"    

I shrug before downing the rest of my drink in one gulp, and sliding off the bar stool.     

"Well, thanks for the drink." I smirk as his jaw damn near hits the floor.    

"Where the hell are you going?"    

"You said one drink." I shrug and hold up my empty glass.    

"So it's like that huh?"    

"Looks that way, doesn't it?" I chuckle and shake my head. He thought he had a sure thing on his hands, and I do believe I just sent his little world into a tailspin.     

I quickly make my way to the exit, quietly laughing to myself the whole way. He got his drink, what more does he want? I mean really, he got exactly what he asked for, so what the hell is his problem?    

Clearly, there is no pleasing this man.

"Lovestoned"-Justin Timberlake    

"Hey, how's it going?" I turn around, fully prepared to bitch Justin out for the millionth time in the last two weeks, but when my eyes land on the man in front of me, I can't hardly breathe, much less speak.    

He has the clearest blue eyes I think I've ever seen, and my knees turn to jello the second he smiles at me.    

"Not bad. How about you?"    

"I can't complain." He nods slowly and takes a sip of his drink before extending his hand to me. "I'm Max, by the way."    

I shake his hand and smile stupidly. "Emma."    

I know, I'm supposed to be little miss anti-social and against anything romantic, but this man is too gorgeous to ignore. Call me superficial, but I think everybody goes for just looks at some point. Besides, I have no intention of letting this go any farther than a drink or two and maybe a little flirting.     

That's not completely wrong, is it?    

I may be down on love and relationships at this stage in my life, but I do miss the attention and affection sometimes.    

I know, I know, I know... I've been getting an insane amount of attention from Justin, but he's just... he's too eager. And that constantly being up my ass stuff doesn't help his case any either.    

This guy right here though, I can tell that if I blew him off now, he'd move onto the next girl, and I wouldn't be an afterthought. As stupid as it sounds, that's kind of intriguing.     

"So, you from around here?"    

"Yep. Born and raised." I nod, my eyes quickly scanning the bar in search of my friends.    

If I'm lucky, they'll stay at the bar long enough for me to maybe get a phone number I'll never dial and I won't have to listen to them give me shit about blowing off the king of pop, while I'm falling all over myself for an average Joe.    

The fact of the matter is, I just don't like Justin. I mean, I'm sure he's an ok guy, but there's no attraction. He's cocky and pretty annoying actually, and I just... I'm not interested in him. I don't know why that's such a crime.    

This kind of thing happens to people everyday. You fall in love with your best friend, they don't feel the same. You're crazy about the guy who sits across from you at work, you're not his type. Strange guy in a bar asks you out, you turn him down.    

Some people get rejected, some don't. It's a fact of life.    

Honestly, Justin should be glad that I'm shooting him down. A lot of girls probably would have said yes, whether they really liked him or not. You'd think he'd be happy to see someone ignore his fame and money bullshit, and turn him down because of who he is, rather than what he is.    

Frankly, I couldn't care less what he does for a living. It doesn't matter to me if he's a garbage man, or a fucking circus performer. That spark just isn't there and I can't help that.    

The heart wants what it wants, and my heart doesn't want Justin.    

"That's cool." Max nods. "I'm actually on vacation with some friends. I'm just not sure I wanna leave." His laugh is kind of deep and I can't help but smile at the way his eyes light up when he grins at me.    

This guy could get me into some very serious trouble.    

Oh come on Emma! Get a fucking grip!     

I swear, I'm just as bad as a man. I see a pretty face and I immediately start thinking of all the dirty things I could do to him.    

And, just what the hell am I thinking? Number one, I'm pretty strict on my no bar hook-ups rule. Plus, the last time I was swayed by a good looking guy.... well, it wasn't pretty. We'll leave it at that for now.    

But damnit, this one is impossibly gorgeous and has the most adorable smile I've ever seen.     

Oh screw it, whatever happens.... happens.    

I down the rest of my drink and wince at the burning sensation in my throat. I really hate the taste of vodka, but for some reason... I never stop drinking it.    

Apparently, I just never learn.    

"Here, I'll grab ya a refill." Max smiles and grabs my now empty glass before maneuvering his way through the crowd.     

I'm not going to let myself do anything stupid tonight. I don't care how cute he is or what lines he uses. I'm standing my ground.    

I. Am. Not. Going. Home. With Him.    

"Well, well, well.... look who's here." I roll my eyes as Justin plants himself on one of the stools at my table.    

Just when I thought I was in for a fairly peaceful and harassment free evening, he has to pop up. He must be getting pretty good at this stalker routine he's got going. I didn't even know he was here tonight.    

"I'm always here." I mutter and crane my neck to see if Max is on his way back yet.    

"There's a pretty long line up there. He'll probably be gone for awhile." My eyes widen at his statement and he chuckles softly before rolling his eyes. "If you're trying to make me jealous, it's definitely working Em."    

"Oh please." I laugh and shake my head. "Why the hell would I want, or even need, to make you jealous?"    

"I don't know... you tell me."    

"Alright, most people use jealousy as a tool to gain attention. I don't need any more of your attention Justin. Believe me, I've gotten way more than enough already."    

"And you secretly love it. Just admit it."    

"Your ego has it's own zip code, doesn't it?"     

"You kidding? I've got my own area code." He grins and I can't help but laugh along with him.    

Alright... he can make fun of himself. I'll give him credit for that. But, one semi-amusing joke isn't gonna change my mind.    

He's still a jackass.    

"Looks like your boyfriend's coming back." He nods toward the back of the building and sure enough, Max is headed straight for us.    

"Bye Justin." I mutter and smooth out the wrinkles in my skirt.    

"I'm not leaving."    

"Like hell you're not. Get up."    

"Nope."    

"What are you... like four? I said leave."    

"Uh huh." He shakes his head defiantly, his smile growing wider the closer Max gets. "And I'm five, by the way."    

"I fucking hate you." I seethe and turn to greet Max, an excited smile plastered on my face. "Thanks! You didn't have to do that."    

"Ah, it's nothing." He shrugs, his gaze falling on Justin before he extends his hand to him. "Max."    

"Nice to meet ya man. I'm Justin." He nods enthusiastically.     

Is this God's way of punishing me for being mean to Justin? If it is, kudos to the man upstairs, because this is ten kinds of fucked up.    

"You a friend of Emma's?"    

"Something like that." Justin smirks and I roll my eyes at the look of realization that appears on Max's face.    

Great, thanks to Justin and his big fucking mouth, he thinks there's something going on here. Prefect. Fucking wonderful.    

I really, really, really hate Justin.    

"Well Jus... it was nice running into you. Keep in touch, five years really was too long." I smile and gently push him off the stool.     

"Yeah, see you around Em." He mumbles and I can't ignore the hurt in his eyes.    

I am so not a good person.    

And,  I really don't understand what that boy sees in me.     

I just might have to be careful with my rejections of Justin Timberlake. Two weeks ago, it was kind of funny to watch him walk away all defeated, but now... now I just feel guilty after seeing that pained look on his face.    

I can't help wondering if maybe, he's interested in more than a quick lay. And maybe... maybe he isn't like every other guy I've come in contact with.    

But, no matter what kind of guy he is... it doesn't change my feelings.     

If I'm going to get involved with someone, that spark has to be there.    

And, with Justin, it's just.... not.

I stroll into the store and smirk at the disheveled state of my two best friends. They each look like they were hit by a Mack truck last night and that can only mean one thing. They got completely fucking hammered.    

I, however, was a perfect little angel. I had two drinks with Max, we flirted, got to know each other a little, exchanged numbers and went our separate ways.    

It was a decent evening, although, I'm pretty sure I'll never see or hear from him again. After all, the guy is just here on vacation. In a couple weeks, he'll go back to where ever the hell he's from, and I'll continue my day to day routine.    

And really, I'm ok with that. Maybe the fact that it was a one time thing is the reason it was so enjoyable. In the back of my mind, I knew I'd never see him again, so I didn't have to impress him. I was able to totally be myself and not really care what he or anybody else thought.    

"Don't you two look lovely this morning?"    

"I swear to God Emma, if you don't stop screaming, I will rip your vocal chords out." Jules mutters, her head resting in her hands.     

Oh, today is going to be a freaking blast, I can already tell.   

"So, where'd you disappear to last night? Timberlake finally land you in the sack?" Cooper smirks before tossing two aspirin into his mouth and downing them with a bottle of water.    

"Yeah, right." I snort and roll my eyes.    

These two are so not fun when they're hungover.     

"I did meet a guy though. Prolly won't see him again, but I did get a phone number." Cooper's eyes light up and I can just see the wheels turning in his head.    

"Alright, let's hear it." He grins and pats the counter, encouraging me to take a seat. "I want to know everything."    

"There's nothing to tell." I shrug. "We had a couple drinks. We talked. We left. End of story."    

"And exactly why aren't you seeing him again?"    

"He's just here on vacation."    

"So? You have a fling. Be wild... be spontaneous, be slutty."    

I giggle at him and roll my eyes. "You're out of your damn mind. But anyway... it's really not a big deal. We just hung out for awhile. Nothing to get all worked up about."    

"So, what about Justin?" Cooper arches an eyebrow at me and I groan.     

I really don't know why they're so focused on this Justin thing. I mean, I know they want to see me dating and happy, but... they have to know that I just couldn't handle it right now.    

"What about him? I barely know the guy and he's beginning to reach stalker level and it's fucking creepy."    

"I think it's cute." Jules mumbles, still hunched over the counter. "He's like this puppy that really wants to hump your leg or something and no matter how many times you kick him away, he just keeps coming back."    

"Are you hearing yourself right now?" I laugh in disbelief and shake my head. I really don't know where she comes up with shit like that.    

"So anyway, I've got some ideas for this new jeans display..." Cooper begins babbling about racks, mannequins and God knows what else, but I quickly tune him out.    

For some unknown reason, my friends seem to really like Justin, even though they've only talked to him a handful of times.    

And, even I'll admit that he's probably a good guy deep down, but I just can't see him going beyond friend territory, if he gets even that far.    

Although, he does have a little bit of that mysterious quality going for him, because for the life of me... I can't figure out why in the hell he keeps coming back.     

I mean, even a dog doesn't want to hump a persons leg that fucking bad, does it?    

Great, now I'm borrowing analogies from Jules. I'm officially losing my mind and it's all thanks to Justin Timberlake.    

*********************    

"Rum and coke for my lady." Justin grins and places a fresh drink in front of me and all I can do is roll my eyes.     

"Getting me drunk isn't going to do you any favors."    

"I'm just being nice." He shrugs and takes a sip from his bottle. "So, where's the crew tonight?"    

"Jules is still recovering from last night...Coop's in the bathroom." I nod slowly. "Why are you always here alone?"    

"I'm not. My friend Trace is around here somewhere, probably trying to pick up some chick. No boyfriend tonight?"    

"He isn't my boyfriend." I mutter and roll my eyes. Clearly, jealousy suits him about as well as desperation does.     

"Maybe not yet, but he will be." He laughs humorlessly and shakes his head.     

Every day, this gets harder and harder to understand. This guy spends two weeks being shot down and humiliated, but refuses to give up. Then, when he sees me talking to someone else, he goes into this jealous boyfriend routine, like I'm deliberately trying to piss him off.     

By now, it's fair to say we're acquaintances but, by no stretch of the imagination are we friends, or anything more. What the hell gives him the right to judge or question me?    

"Justin, can I ask you something?"    

"Shoot." He nods and eases onto the stool next to me.     

"Why do you keep doing this? I mean, honestly... who puts up with this kind of shit? Nobody gets rejected like this and keeps coming back."    

"I'm not so sure you'd understand it." He says simply and shrugs.    

"I'm a pretty understanding girl, try me."    

"Well...." He lets out a long sigh and nervously peels the label off his beer bottle. "Not to sound like an arrogant prick or anything, but I'm used to getting my way... alot. Like, I never really have to work for anything. Half the time, shit just gets handed to me, even if I don't really want it. And, I like you Emma, there's something about you that I just like, and I'm not gonna lie... I expected you to fall at my fucking feet the first time I talked to you, and when you didn't... it was like holy shit, this chick ain't buying it. I'll be the first to admit, I'm a determined little fucker. And on the rare occasion I don't get my way, I keep going til I do."    

"I see. You're borderline stalking me to pump up your ego? Real nice Justin. I thought the idea was to change my opinion, not solidify it."    

"See... you don't get it. I fucking told you, you wouldn't understand." He sighs and rolls his eyes again. "It's not about my God damn ego or anything like that. You just... you knock me off my pedestal, and I need that. I like knowing there's somebody around to tell me how it is. Then throw in the fact that you're fuckin hot..." He trails off and I can't help but laugh at him.     

He's right. I don't really understand, but then again... I don't really know anything about him. I mean, I'm sure he's telling the truth, he probably lives a privileged life that most people can only dream about, but I have a hard time feeling sorry for him because of it.     

That poor, pitiful celebrity shit just doesn't fly with me. He's got God knows how much money, the world at his fucking fingertips, he can probably do any damn thing he wants. Why would anyone whine or complain about that?    

But then again, I don't know what it's really like. He probably has little to no privacy. Doesn't get to be with the people who genuinely care about him. Works more than any person should. Has to live up to millions of people's expectations.    

I guess I can see where that would get tiring, but... I don't see how chasing after a girl balances that out. So, I've come to one simple conclusion.    

Justin Timberlake, is fucking weird.

"Loverboy's on his way over." Jules snickers as Justin weaves his way through the crowd toward us. He finally stops in front of us and slams his hands down on the table, a stupid grin plastered on his face.    

"What up, party people?" He shouts happily.    

"Oh Jesus... he's fucking smashed." Cooper laughs and shakes his head as Justin continues to ramble incoherently.     

In the two and a half weeks since we met, I've never seen him like this. Granted, he almost always has a drink in his hand when he's here, but until tonight, I hadn't actually seen him drunk. Hell, come to think of it... I don't think I've even seen him buzzed.    

Which is unfortunate, really. If he was drunk, atleast then he'd have an excuse for all the corny shit he's said to me.    

"Alright folks, finish your drinks and get the hell out!" The bartender calls out as the music is shut off and the lights come up. I toss the rest of my drink back quickly and slide off my stool, Jules and Cooper following close behind.    

"Where y'all goin?" Justin slurs, squinting his eyes at the three of us.    

"The bar's closing." I shrug and pull on my jacket. "I suggest you find your friend... obviously, you won't be driving yourself home tonight."    

"He already left with some broad." Justin rolls his eyes and plops down on a stool. "Guess I'll have to walk home."    

"Dude, just get a cab." Jules chuckles, watching Justin sway in his seat.    

"Oh yeah! Cab!" He nods excitedly and heads for the door.    

He stumbles to the curb, waving his arms around frantically, trying to hail a cab, but the street is completely empty.    

Great, he's totally wasted.     

I know I'll regret what I'm about to do, but I can't leave him here like this. The good Samaritan in me just can't do it.    

"I'll give you a ride Justin." I mutter and make my way to my car.    

"You want us to go with you?" Jules asks, arching an eyebrow at me as she watches Justin trudge along behind me.    

"Nah, it'll be alright. He's too wasted to try molesting me or anything.... I think." I crack and unlock the doors before guiding Justin into the passenger seat. "You guys head on home, I'll see ya in the morning."    

"Alright, be careful Em." Cooper calls over his shoulder as he and Jules head for their own cars.    

I climb into the driver seat to find Justin playing with the radio and giggling like a 12 year old girl. This should be nice and interesting.    

"Alright, where do you live Justin?" He appears to be deep in thought for several seconds before his eyes light up and he smiles brightly.    

"I live at my house!"     

"And exactly where is that?"    

"Oh... umm... it's a gray building. On the corner." He nods seriously and I'm fighting the urge to slap him.    

I saw a stand-up comedian one time who said taking care of a drunk person is a lot like taking care of a baby. Let me just take a second to say, that guy was not fucking kidding. Dealing with a drunk Justin is just like dealing with a two year old.    

"Alright, which corner?" I ask, trying my best to keep the annoyance out of my voice.    

"It's... it's.... I forgot." He pouts and folds his arms over his chest.    

Note to self: Never volunteer to play designated driver unless you know where the drunk lives.    

"Is there someone you can call?"    

"Trace." He shrugs and digs his phone out of his pocket. He dials the number slowly, holding the phone barely an inch away from his face. He finally raises the phone to his ear and let's it ring for several minutes before he snaps it shut. "No answer." He mumbles and suddenly, I feel like I'm going to scream, or shove his face through the windshield.    

I knew I was going to regret this.

*************    

"I fell into a burning ring of fire, and it burns, burns, burns... the ring of fire!" Justin wails and I quickly clamp my hand over his mouth as we climb the stairs to my apartment.    

"So help me God, if you don't shut the fuck up... I'm going to push you down these steps." I glare at him and he nods before sticking his tongue out and swiping it across the palm of my hand. "You're disgusting."    

"No... I'm cute!" He grins stupidly and all I can do is roll my eyes.     

We finally reach my door and I dig my keys out of my purse while Justin wobbles around the hallway, still humming "Ring Of Fire." He really is an idiot.    

But, the small part of me that's actually a decent person just couldn't leave him stranded at the bar. So, since he couldn't give me an address or any form of directions, I had no choice but to bring him back to my place.     

"Alright, you get the couch. In the morning, we'll call your friend and have him come get you. Kapiesh?"     

"Yes sir!" Justin salutes me, then stumbles across the living room, knocking things off the table.     

He stops in front of me and grins like he knows something I don't. I swear, the more I see of him... the weirder he gets.     

"Night Justin." I nod and turn to head for my bedroom, but he quickly grabs my arm and pulls me against him.    

"Why won't you go out with me?" Oh he is entirely too wasted for this conversation, and frankly... I'm not in the mood to list all those reasons for the millionth time.    

"Goodnight Justin." I repeat with a little more force, hoping he'll get the hint and let me go.    

"Night Emma." He smiles and leans in, quickly pressing his lips to my cheek before he releases me then collapses onto the couch.    

He's knocked out within seconds and I head for my bedroom, attempting to ignore the butterflies in my stomach and the tingling sensation in the spot where his lips had been.    

Damn.    

This is proof that it's been far too long since I've seen any action. Even a stupid kiss on the cheek from Justin is giving me that lightheaded, dizzy feeling.    

Maybe tomorrow, I need to swallow my pride and give Max a call. Because obviously, my body and mind are not on the same page when it comes to the romantic stuff.     

Who knows, maybe fooling around with Max might be the best thing for me. After all, he's leaving in a couple weeks, so I won't have the time to get attached.    

Unfortunately, there's this nagging voice in the back of my mind, trying to tell me that the only male attention I really want, is Justin's.    

But, I'm going to ignore that voice, because the last time I checked... hell was still pretty damn warm, pigs have yet to take flight, and worms certainly haven't sprouted ears.    

I am not forming a crush on Justin.    

It's not possible.    

I flip the light on my nightstand out and crawl into bed, repeating the same phrase over and over in my head.    

I do not like Justin.

****************    

There are moments in life, where you would absolutely kill for everyone you know to be present. Sometimes it's a party, or winning a fight. Then, there are times like this,  where you stumble upon something so ridiculous, it has to be seen to be believed.     

When I woke up this morning, I'd almost forgotten about the drunken fool I brought home last night. Until, I walked into my living room and found him sprawled out on the floor underneath my coffee table, stripped down to just his boxers and sneakers.    

I don't know how or why he ended up like this, and I'm not so sure I want to. I just want him out of my home so I can go to work.    

"Justin..." I poke his shoulder with the toe of my shoe, but he doesn't budge. I try again a little harder, and still nothing.    

Great, with my luck, he's probably died of alcohol poisoning or something. How the hell do you explain a half naked, dead pop star underneath your coffee table?    

There's a loud knock on the door and Justin finally stirs before shooting up from his laying position, and bashing the top of his head into the underside of the table.    

As the dull thud echoes throughout my apartment, I have to cover my mouth to hide my laughter. I really don't know when my life became a bad sitcom.     

I pad over to the door and swing it open, slightly surprised at the sight of the unfamiliar man standing in front of me.    

"Where is he?" He demands before I'm able to utter a single word.   

"Excuse me?"    

"Where. Is. He." He repeats slowly, like he's talking to someone who hasn't quite grasped the english language.    

"Who the fuck are you, and how did you find my apartment?"    

"Trace." He rolls his eyes and shifts awkwardly. "I came to pick up Justin. I'm the asshole who ditched him at the bar... and he gave me your address in a voicemail, about five this morning."    

"Oh... so you're the one I have to thank for this?" I smirk and gesture toward Justin, who's fallen back asleep under the table.    

"Shit... how drunk was he?" He laughs and steps into the apartment.    

"Pretty damn."    

"Damn... I'm really sorry." He chuckles before bending down and shaking Justin's arm. "Come on J... wake the fuck up." He smacks him in the face a little and I can't help but laugh.    

I like this guy already. It's a shame Justin isn't as cool as his friend appears to be.    

"Where the hell are my clothes?" Justin asks, finally awake enough to crawl out from under the table and stand up.     

His jeans, T-shirt and jacket are haphazardly strewn about on my couch and I toss them to him, laughing as he quickly pulls them on.    

"Emma... I'm so sorry. You should have just left me at the bar." He chuckles nervously, trying his best to cover up his embarrassment.    

"Eh... just take it as a sign that I'm not a complete bitch." I shrug and gather my things. "Now, y'all need to go. I'm running late."    

"Yeah..." Justin nods as he and Trace head for the door. "Thanks again Emma."    

"Yeah, yeah. Whatever." I give the two of them a dismissive wave as they leave.    

Taking care of a drunk Justin was no picnic, but I can't ignore the slight fear that he may be too embarrassed about last night to ever talk to me again.

"Ring of Fire"-Johnny Cash    
     

"Will you slow down on the Cuervo? Jesus, woman." Cooper mutters after watching me down my third shot in the last 10 minutes.    

I know I'm acting like a moron, but I can't help it. I'm just so damn nervous.    

Just like I'd planned, I called Max yesterday and he agreed to meet me here, on a date of sorts. I mean technically, it's not a date since Jules and Cooper refuse to leave, but it's close enough to make me anxious.    

Maybe my nerves are a sign that I'm jumping the gun here. It hasn't even been a year since Andrew. Maybe I'm just not ready for all of this yet.    

Oh who the hell am I kidding?    

The whole purpose of this pseudo-date isn't to get into some emotional thing. It's to get laid, plain and simple.    

I know what you're thinking. I've turned into a complete and total hypocrite, believe me... I've been thinking the same exact thing.    

But damnit, I miss the physical stuff and the incident with Justin the other night just proved it.     

It's been two days and I haven't seen him since he high tailed it out of my apartment. If he's been in the bar, he's been hiding himself pretty damn well.    

The weird thing is, not seeing him just doesn't feel right. The best I can figure is that after two and a half weeks of nightly harassment, Justin has become part of my daily routine.    

Wake up. Shower. Dress. Work. Go to bar. Get hit on by king of pop. Reject king of pop. Go home annoyed. Repeat.    

Maybe I've just gotten so used to his irritating antics that two days without them is throwing me off a bit.    

The bad part is, his sudden disappearing act is furthering my assumption that the other night embarrassed the hell out of him. Which is stupid, really. After all the lines he's tried on me, getting drunk and passing out in my apartment shouldn't be a cause for humiliation.         

But as I've said before, I don't really know Justin very well, so I don't know how he deals with stuff like this. But apparently, he's quite partial to the hiding and running away thing.    

All I know is, not seeing him is a little weird. But, I'll survive.    

Atleast without Justin hanging around, I can throw myself at Max with little to no interruption. Which is definitely a good thing.     

I finally spot Max entering the bar and my stomach turns. Oh god... I'm gonna throw up.    

This is so stupid. I mean really, I've asked this guy (whose last name I don't even know), here on the premise of a date when in reality, my main goal is to get into his pants. I really am pathetic.    

"Hey." He grins as he slides onto the stool beside me. He really is far too pretty for his own good.    

Those eyes and that smile are completely swoon worthy and as cold hearted as I may be, I'm no exception to that charm.    

"Hi." Oh Jesus... I'm giggling!    

When the hell did I turn into such a friggen airhead?    

"Max, this is Jules and Cooper. Guys, this is Max." He nods his greeting at the two of them before turning his attention to me, that smile never leaving his face.    

"You wanna grab a drink?"    

"Oh yeah, sure." I nod dumbly and rise from my seat, ignoring the knowing looks and thumbs up my friends give me as soon as Max turns his back.    

Sometimes, I wonder if they know the meaning of the world subtle. With the way they're acting now, it's highly unlikely.    

"So, what's the poison this evening?" Max smirks as he leans into me, his hand resting on the small of my back.    

"Oh... uhh.... umm...." I stutter, unable to ignore the heat surging through my body.    

Either that damn tequila has decided to kick in, or I'm much more attracted to Max than I originally thought. Never in my life has a simple touch shocked my system like that.    

"Whatever's fine." I finally manage  to choke out.     

He's going to think I'm a bumbling idiot by the end of the night, and run screaming in the other direction. I just know it.    

"You sure letting me pick is a good idea? I mean, what if I get you all liquored up and take advantage of you?" He laughs mischievously.     

God, I sure as hell hope so.    

"Well, guess I'll just have to trust you, huh?" I think that's the first semi-intelligible thing I've said in the last five minutes. Progress is a good sign.    

"Looks like it." He chuckles before ordering two beers and handing one to me. "So, you guys come here a lot, huh?"    

"Every night." I nod. "Mostly just to hang out and bullshit. We have no lives." I laugh nervously and roll my eyes at my own stupidity.    

Good one, Walker. Let him think you're a moronic alcoholic with no social life. I'm on a fucking roll tonight folks!    

"That's kinda cool though, ya know? Back home we go to the pool hall a lot. Atleast you've got somewhere to hang out." He smiles and I feel my knees go weak.    

It's really quite sad that this man is able to turn me into a puddle of mush with just one look.    

The really weird thing though, according to Cooper, Justin has that same affect on a majority of the world's female population. But, apparently I'm immune to it.    

Max however, is a completely different story.

*********************    

"I've never done this before." I mumble against his lips as he backs me into the wall of the elevator.     

"Me either." He replies distractedly, fumbling with the buttons on my blouse.     

Let's list the so very appropriate, derogatory terms that could describe me at this very moment, shall we?    

Slut.    

Hypocrite.    

Liar.     

Manipulator.    

I could probably think of a few more... but there's an impossibly good looking man attempting to undress me while his tongue is shoved half way down my throat. So, I'm just a tad... preoccupied, you could say.     

The elevator dings, signaling our arrival at my floor, and we attempt to collect ourselves the best we can. Although, I'm pretty sure my smeared make-up and jacked up hair are a sure sign that something slightly naughty was going on here.     

But, I really just don't care.    

The doors open, and thankfully.... the hallway is empty. We step off the elevator and head for my door, Max's hands continuing their exploration of my body.    

I know I could probably blame my actions on the alcohol, but I am most definitely not drunk. I guess I just wanted to do something kind of crazy and out of character for me.    

Max is only in the city for another week, so what the hell, right? You only live once, so you may as well take advantage of every opportunity thrown your way.    

However, I don't plan on this whole bar hook-up thing becoming a habit. Max is a special circumstance.     

We turn the corner leading to my apartment and stop dead in our tracks at the sight before us.    

No, no, no.     

This is so not fucking fair!    

I had a plan, and this was certainly not part of it.    

We were supposed to go into my apartment, have insanely hot sex, and forget about each other in the morning. It would have been a very simple, no strings attached kind of deal.    

And now, my whole plan has gone straight to hell, because Justin Timberlake is seated in front of my door, a bouquet of white orchids in his hand. He scrambles to his feet as soon as he spots us, and I don't miss the jealousy that flashes in his eyes.    

"Hey... Justin..." I smile uneasily as Max tightens his hold on my hips and pulls me against him.     

"Hey." He replies flatly, barely even glancing at Max. "I was expecting you to be... alone."    

"I can go on in if you guys need to talk or something..." Max offers, but stops when Justin shoves the flowers into my hands with a roll of his eyes.    

"I was just leaving... see you around, Emma." He mutters and stalks down the hallway without another word.    

Yeah, that wasn't awkward or anything.     

"What the hell was that about?" Max asks, a hint of laughter in his voice.    

"I'm... I'm really not sure."     

Unfortunately, I actually have a slight idea.    

Chances are good, Justin came here to apologize for the other night, which is completely unnecessary. Shit happens, ya know? No need to blow it out of proportion.    

But, when you like someone as much as Justin seems to like me, the smallest infraction can seem earth-shattering. And, I'm sure he's a little hung up on letting himself act like that in front of me.    

Personally, when I'm hooked on somebody, I do every damn thing I can to be as perfect as humanly possible. It's human nature, I think. You want to impress that person. You want them to think you're the most wonderful thing to walk the earth. And when that front fades, you'll do anything you can to put it back up.    

Up to and including, sitting outside their door at three in the morning with flowers.     

Under normal circumstances, I'd probably laugh the whole thing off, and go into work in the morning, telling my friends all about the most recent evidence of Justin's stalking capabilities.     

But, I feel too bad about this to breathe a word of it to anyone. In fact... I think I've just changed my mind about my entire plan for this evening.    

"You probably won't like me very much after I say this... but, umm...."    

"It's all good." Max grins and tucks my tangled hair behind my ear. "There's no need to act all weird and hop in the sack just cause I'm leaving in a week. I get it, ya know? You're a good girl, Emma. And, I happen to think I'm a pretty damn good guy, so we'll just call it a night... cool?"    

"Yeah, cool." I nod.     

"Alright. Then, I'll see you at the bar tomorrow night?"    

"Definitely."

"Cool. Night, Emma." He smiles and gives me a quick kiss before turning and making his way down the hallway.     

If the guilt wasn't eating me alive right now, I'd be envisioning various ways to strangle Justin for ruining my almost perfect night.     

Morals are so fucking overrated.

***************    

"So you just let him leave?" Cooper practically shrieks and shakes his head. "I know I taught you better than that!"    

"Oh come on... how was I supposed to do anything with him after that? I felt so damn bad!"    

"He cock-blocked you, Em." Cooper sighs sadly and rolls his eyes.     

"Actually... I happen to believe it was fate. Obviously, I was not supposed to turn into some mega-slut and sleep with a guy I don't know." I shrug and take a sip of my water.    

After spending the night tossing and turning, I've decided that I'm completely ok with last night's unexpected turn of events.    

In the back of my mind, I knew it was stupid to take Max home. It's not who I am, and I would have hated myself in the morning. I'm actually pretty thankful that Justin was there.     

Well... ok, I could have done without the awkward exchange, but if it hadn't been for that... Lord only knows what would have happened. So... I'm definitely glad my conscience kicked in when it did.    

The doors to the shop swing open, and I'm sure you can assume who struts in, like he owns the fucking place or something.    

This is only the second time he's been here that I know of, but this time... there's no entourage, or short little buddy to accompany him.     

"Hey Justin... anything I can do for ya?" Cooper smiles and hops off the counter.    

"Nah, not really." He shrugs, not bothering to take his sunglasses off. He looks around the store for several minutes, not so much as even glancing at me.    

"Hi Justin."     

I can only assume that he's come here to shove his anger in my face or something. As far as he knows, I blew off his appearance last night, and went inside with Max and did exactly what I planned on doing.    

I can't explain it, but this small part of me wants him to know just how wrong that assumption is. I guess I just don't want him thinking I'm a bad person or something. Although, I'm not really sure why I give a shit what he thinks.    

"Yeah.. hey." He nods disinterestedly before sauntering off in the other direction. He stops when he reaches Jules, who's on the other side of the building, hanging up the new sun dresses we just got in.     

They talk for awhile, both of them stopping to laugh every few minutes. Now, I know Jules well enough to know what she's doing, and I've got to admit... I'm a little... surprised, I guess is the right word.    

I mean, ok yeah... she's said a few times that she thought he was attractive, even commented on the cuteness of his stalker tendencies.     

But I definitely wasn't expecting her to flirt with him, in front of me no less.     

Finally, Justin breezes out of the store, Jules watching him leave,with this stupid, smitten grin on her face.     

"What the hell was that?" Cooper calls out, breaking her trance.    

"He just asked me out." She giggles. "He's meeting me at the bar tonight."    

What the fucking hell?

Jules and Justin.    

Justin and Jules.    

Is it just me or does that not even sound right? Either way you say it, it just doesn't fit.    

And, he is so completely not even her type. Jules is all about those bad boys. The ones covered in tattoos who drink and smoke entirely too much.    

So, exactly what the fuck is she doing on a date with Justin? It just doesn't make sense.    

I mean, I'm not mad or anything. I've made it perfectly clear that I don't want him, so he's public property. And, Jules is a single girl, more than welcome to date whoever she pleases. I have no say in the matter what so ever.    

It's just far too odd to be ignored.     

Especially when you consider the timing.     

Just last night, I found Justin sitting on my door step with flowers, and tonight he's out with my best friend, acting as if nothing ever happened.     

Am I really that easy to get over?    

As stupid as it sounds, that's a question I've had to ask myself many, many times, and each time, the answer becomes a clearer yes.    

Not that I want Justin to spend his time pining away for me or anything. It's just becoming painfully obvious that the men who claim to like, care about or even love me, seem to move onto someone else pretty damn quickly.    

"Pouting isn't a good look for you, ya know." Cooper smirks as he places a drink in front of me and sits down.    

"I'm not pouting."    

"Right. I'm gay, not stupid Em. I may not understand the male and female dynamic, but I know heartbreak when I see it. And this thing with Jules is making you crazy."    

"No it's not. It's fine, really."    

"Emma... don't lie to me."    

"I'm not. I just... it just got me thinking, you know? Like, why am I so easy to pass on? I date these guys, we break up, and a week later they're fucking engaged or something, and I'm still laying in bed, eating ice cream and crying to my cat."    

"Probably because you date idiots." He chuckles and pats my knee. "Em, I'm gonna do the sappy thing here and tell you that you're gorgeous and amazing and any guy would be lucky to have you. But, you do have your issues. You just need to find somebody who can handle that shit too. And you will... eventually."    

"Why do you have to be gay?" I giggle and roll my eyes. "That's really not fair, you know."    

"Yeah well, I guess the guy upstairs decided I'm just far too incredible to be with women." He shrugs. "Anyway, Jules should be here soon, so cheer the fuck up and be nice."    

"I'm always nice."    

"Sure, and I'm going to marry Clive Owen." He mutters before taking a sip of his drink. "Well, would you look at that? The blue-balled boy toy decided to make an appearance."    

"Cooper!" I shriek and slap his arm roughly. Don't let him fool you, he may be nice most of the time, but he can be a total prick when he wants to be.        

"Damnit Emma, watch the jacket... it's Italian!"    

I swear, sometimes I have no clue why I tell this man anything. I mean, I didn't want to tell him about last night, especially the parts involving Justin, but he has this way of forcing information out of me.     

I love and hate him for it.    

After I gave him every detail of the most awkward night in history, he spent the entire day coming up with creative little nicknames for Max. All of them centered around the term "blue balls." I'm telling you, the man is pure evil. But, I guess that's just a part of his charm.    

It really is a damn shame that he's so set on playing for the other team. He could probably make some girl insanely happy.     

"Hey guys, how we doin?" Max smiles as he takes a seat at our table.    

"Not bad man. You?" Cooper nods.    

"I'm good. Em, you doing alright?"    

"Oh yeah... I'm fine." I force a smile, keeping my eyes glued to the entrance.     

Cooper said Jules was on her way, so what the hell is taking so long?    

"Alright, I'm gonna grab a drink. You guys need anything?"    

The door to the bar opens and Justin strolls inside. It takes a second, but he finally spots us and heads in our direction.    

"I'll come with you." I smile and quickly hop off of my stool, immediately lacing my fingers with Max's.    

We weave our way through the crowd and as soon as we reach the back of the line, he pulls his hand from mine and frowns.    

"You don't have to do this."    

"Do what?"    

"Over compensate for last night. I'm cool with the fact that nothing happened, ok? I like you Emma, I'm not here because I want to get laid before I go back home." His frown finally fades and he gives me a small smile. "Let's just forget about last night, alright? I'm not real good at dealing with this awkward shit."    

Oh, he has absolutely no clue what he's in for. Tonight has the potential to be ten times more awkward than last night, but I'll keep that little bit of information to myself.    

"Sounds good." I nod and grab his hand once again. "It's forgotten."    

"Good. Now, let's get shit faced and see what happens." He grins and wiggles his eyebrows suggestively.    

Maybe forgetting about last night isn't such a bad idea. After all, I seem to be the only one who's still hung up on it.

*****************    

"I just wanted to find a place to hang out that nobody would know me, and this was it." Justin shrugs and slides his arm around the back of Jules's chair.    

I quickly grab the small glass in front of me and toss the yellowish liquid back, wincing at the burning sensation making it's way down my throat.    

I always promise myself that I'm not going to drink tequila, but sometimes, I just really don't care about breaking the promises I make to myself.    

To put it simply, tequila is my kryptonite.     

A few shots, and that's it. The Emma that everyone knows vanishes and is quickly replaced by this sloppy, stupid, loud, foul mouthed, kind of slutty girl. Sometimes, it's fun. But usually, I just end up making myself look like a jackass.  I'm sure you can assume which of the two will most likely be happening tonight.  

Justin whispers something to Jules and she giggles loudly before they both rise from their seats and disappear into the crowd. I grab the bottle and pour myself another shot and down it quicker than the first.    

Is it just me or is it suddenly really fucking hot in here?    

"You know what... we should go somewhere different. A club or something." Cooper says then takes the last sip of his beer.    

"I'm not drunk enough for that yet." Max shakes his head and takes a shot.    

Justin and Jules return a few minutes later, arms wrapped around each other, laughing at God only knows what.    

Shot number three, down the hatch.    

I slide out of my seat and place myself in Max's lap. I swear, I just saw Justin roll his eyes, but I could be mistaken. After all, I'm on my fourth shot and pretty soon, I'm going to lose the ability to function properly. It really wouldn't be much of a surprise if I'm just seeing shit.    

"I think a club might be kinda fun. I mean, we're always here."    

"Alright, but fair warning... I can't dance."

"Aw, don't worry Max... I'll try not to make you look too bad." Justin grins wickedly.    

"Thanks man, I appreciate it." Max chuckles as we all collect our things and lave the bar.    

It doesn't take long before we find a club, just a few blocks from our usual hang out. Thanks to Justin and his celebrity bullshit, we're immediately ushered inside and to the VIP section, far away from the general public.    

I've got to admit, the special treatment stuff is actually kind of cool. Especially when you're so used to being one of the people waiting in line on the street for hours, only to be told, as soon as you reach the front of the line, that the club has reached it's full capacity and you won't be getting in.    

"Jules, dance?" Cooper asks as he extends his hand to her, and in a flash, the two of them are gone.    

Well, isn't this just fucking swell?    

I'm slightly drunk and trapped in a room with a man, who I'm quickly developing a massive crush on, and another man, who has spend the last few weeks tormenting the hell out of me.    

I think it's time for some more shots.    

"So Max, what do you do?" Justin asks and eyes him carefully, almost as if he's sizing up his competition.    

"I'm a sports columnist for a paper back home. Nothing too special." He shrugs and takes a long gulp of his beer. Luckily, he's just drunk enough to miss the arrogant smirk Justin is shooting my way.    

I don't know why, but I've got this sinking feeling that Justin is about to turn this into some sort of ridiculous pissing contest. It's almost like he's trying to point out all the ways he's better than Max, but I ain't buying it.   

My lack of interest in Justin doesn't have a damn thing to do with his career, financial status or any of the trivial things he seems to think I'm concerned with.    

"Oh yeah? I guess that doesn't really bring in the big bucks, huh?"    

"I do fairly well." Max nods quickly. "I mean, I'm not raking in millions or anything, but I'm not the type to sell my soul for a Ferrari or something."    

I do believe that's one point Max, Justin.... zero.    

I toss back yet another shot and I'm suddenly realizing, I lost count awhile ago. Not a good sign.    

"So, what... making money's a bad thing?" Justin asks with a roll of his eyes. "Like you wouldn't kill for a fucking Ferrari."    

"That's not what I'm saying. It's the way you go about making that money that creates a problem." Max says simply and shrugs. "And no... I wouldn't kill for a Ferrari. Guys with those kinds of cars are obviously trying to make up for smaller things, and I happen to think I'm ok on that front."    

"Right." Justin mutters and rolls his eyes.     

Cooper and Jules finally return and before she even has a chance to move, Justin pulls Jules down onto his lap and locks his arms around her waist.     

Shot number... oh who the hell am I kidding? I'm done even attempting to keep track.    

Suddenly, I'd love nothing more to slap that challenging grin off of his stupid face. But, I don't like to get mad. I'd much rather get even.    

"Ya know, I'm a little tired." I comment, hoping Max is still sober enough to get the hint.     

"Oh yeah?" He grins drunkenly at me. "You wanna get outta here?"    

"That'd be nice, yeah."    

"Alright... one more beer." He nods and flags down our waitress.    

"Yeah, I think we're gonna head out too." Jules says as she and Justin stand up. "Em, Coop... I'll see you guys in the morning." She gives us one last smile as she and Justin make their way to the exit.    

Is she really leaving with him? I mean, seriously?    

Not that I care or anything, but it's just so not Jules.    

But then again, I'm not exactly being myself by running around with Max, so who the hell am I to criticize?    

Jules and Justin are both adults and free to do whatever they damn well please. It's none of mine or anyone else's business.    

But, I'd be a damn liar if I said I wasn't dying to know what they're doing. And I most certainly can't ignore the knots forming in my stomach as the possibilities flash through my mind.    

Looks like round one goes to Justin.

I open my eyes and the first thing I notice is the intense pounding in my head. As soon as I sit up, the dizziness and nausea begin, and I quickly come to one simple conclusion.    

I've got a killer hangover.    

Wonderful.    

I move to slide out of bed and that's when I notice the arm draped across my torso. I look to my right and find Max out cold, his mouth hanging wide open, his light snoring echoing throughout the room.    

Normally, a situation like this would be cause for a major freak out. But, the fact that we were both wasted beyond belief last night, and still fully clothed this morning, is a sure sign that nothing happened.    

And honestly, I'm not quite sure how I feel about that.     

On one hand, it's definitely a good thing. Max and I are still in those first stages of getting to know each other, and sex could ruin this potentially really good thing. On the other, I kind of wish we could just do it and get it over with. Max will be gone in a matter of days and the realistic side of me knows that this "relationship" is headed straight for a dead end.     

The biggest problem is, I can easily see myself falling for a guy like Max. But, since I'm such a fuck up when it comes to anything remotely romantic, naturally I just had to go and latch onto the guy who's leaving town in a few days.    

The funny thing though, when I met him, I figured I'd landed myself in the perfect situation. I thought I could get all the physical stuff I've been missing, without the emotional attachment. Obviously, I was wrong.         

Which isn't much of a surprise, really. I'm rarely ever right about anything.    

I should have put much more thought into this whole thing.    

Then of course, there's this Justin nonsense. I really feel like I'm starting to lose my damn mind or something. I've said countless times that I'm not interested in him, so why in the hell did seeing him with Jules bother me so much?    

I'm not usually the jealous type, but that's the only thing that can explain the way I acted last night. I was jealous, and I don't even know why.    

Maybe it's the fact that Jules and Justin could have an actual relationship while I'll be saying good-bye to Max fairly soon. Or maybe, my problem is that Justin's attention is directed elsewhere.    

Every girl likes male attention, and I'm no exception. Sure, Justin was a little extreme and over-bearing, but it was endearing in this really twisted, fucked up way.    

And who knows, maybe if Max hadn't shown up when he did, I may have eventually caved to Justin. There's really no way to tell, and now I guess I'll never know. He's clearly moved on and I'm only making a fool of myself by trying to win back his attention.    

I mean, it's not Jules's fault that I spent so much time rejecting him, so I can't take this out on her. I need to put my jealous, petty, childish bullshit aside and be happy that my best friend has found a guy she seems to really like.     

That's what a good friend would do, and I happen to pride myself on my loyalty as a best friend. It's a role I take pretty seriously and I'm not about to lose my best friend over a stupid boy.    

But, no matter how determined I am to get over whatever the hell my issue is, there's one small detail that still bothers me.    

Why was it so easy for him to turn his interest to Jules?     

I mean, I didn't expect him to follow me around forever, but I didn't think he'd move on, literally over night.    

Maybe the problem isn't the men I get involved with. Maybe it's me.    

Maybe the attitude, cold demeanor, independence and all of the things that I thought made me a strong woman have actually made me impossible to love.    

Max finally stirs beside me and rubs the sleep from his eyes before sitting up and blinking rapidly. He looks around for a few moments before his gaze settles on me, and he offers me a nervous smile.    

"Morning."    

"Yeah." I chuckle awkwardly and run a hand through the tangled mess I call my hair. "You sleep ok?"    

"I wouldn't exactly call it sleeping. So yeah.... I passed out just fine." He laughs and climbs out of bed slowly.     

I'm gonna go out on a limb here and say that this exchange is a thousand times weirder than the typical "morning after" routine.    

I mean, if we'd actually had sex, he'd be flying out of here right now, and I'd be more concerned with feeling cheap than having to make conversation.    

"So, I was thinking..." He trails off as he slides on his shoes. "What if... what if we went on an actual date? Just you and me. No bar. No friends. No world famous musicians. Just you, me, dinner and a movie."    

"I'd like that." I nod as he adjusts his tie, a wide grin spreading across his face.        

"Alright then, I'll call you this afternoon." He gives me a quick kiss and heads out of my bedroom.    

When I hear the front door shut softly, I can't stop the stupid squeal that escapes.     

Just for today, I'm going to forget about the fact that he's leaving soon, and I'm going to pretend that this "relationship" has the potential to go somewhere and be something really special.    

Reality can come back and kick me in the ass tomorrow.

******************    

"So, what happened last night?" Cooper asks, doing his best to sound casual, but failing miserably.    

"Wouldn't you like to know." Jules giggles and I miraculously resist the urge to roll my eyes and gag.    

I know I said I was putting all that jealous, petty stuff behind me, but it's proving to be a little more difficult than I thought. But hey, atleast I'm trying, right?    

"Oh come on, you know we kiss and tell around here woman. Spill it." Cooper demands.    

It's times like these that his sexual orientation is so blatantly obvious it's almost comical. Most of the time, he's your average guy, but if you dangle the slightest bit of gossip in front of him, he's like a friggen bloodhound. He won't stop sniffing around until he's gotten a hold of every last detail.    

"So Em, how was your night?" Jules grins, turning the conversation on me.    

This, I can handle. Talking about Max will be much easier than listening to Jules dish on whatever the hell she and Justin did last night.    

"Oh yes, do tell." Cooper smirks before turning back to Jules. "Don't think you're off the hook just because I'm easily distracted. I will find out. Anyway... Emma...."    

"Nothing happened." I shrug and pull at the loose string on my sleeve. "We were both wasted, so we went back to my place and crashed. We're going out tonight though."    

"Oh cool, Justin's coming out with us too." Jules nods and moves to finish unloading the box in front of her.    

"Yeah, ummm... we aren't going to the bar. We're... we're going on a date." I mumble the last part and hang my head, knowing my friends are about to give me some big time shit.    

I know everyone the world over goes on dates, but actually saying it just feels so... juvenile, for some reason. Uttering the phrase "I have a date" makes me feel like I'm back in eleventh grade, bragging about being asked to the prom or something.    

"Well, this is an interesting little development." Cooper arches an eyebrow in my direction and folds his arms over his chest.    

I know that look, and I've got a funny feeling I'm not going to like what I'm about to hear. I'd take being made fun of, over a lecture from Cooper any day.    

"Em... you know I love you, but this has stupid written all over it. The guy is leaving in three days and I sure as hell don't see you flying to Boston every couple weeks to see him. Getting attached now would probably be the dumbest fucking thing you've ever done. You gotta know that sweetie."    

"I do. And, I'm not getting attached." I mutter defiantly. "I just... why is it so wrong for me to spend some time with him? We like hanging out together. What's the big damn deal?"    

"Alright, fine." He holds his hands up in defense and shakes his head. "You're the relationship expert Em. Remind me to never give you advice again."    

"That's not what I'm saying. Look, I appreciate the concern, but I've got it under control."    

"Alright, whatever you say." He shrugs before shooting a look at Jules, who simply nods.    

I'm not getting attached. I'm just having a little fun with a guy who's almost too good looking to be real. He'll be gone in a few days. What's the worst that could happen, honestly?    

I've totally got this under control. Atleast... I think I do.

******************    

When Max said he wanted the two of us to go on an actual date, I'll admit, I had some expectations. Not necessarily high ones, but there are certain things a girl expects when she's asked on a date.    

I figured he'd whisk me off to a fairly nice restaurant, then we'd go see a movie. Instead, he showed up at my apartment with a bottle of wine, pizza and several DVD's.    

Honestly, it was kind of a pleasant surprise.     

I go out so damn much, the quiet night at home thing is definitely a welcome change. Plus, I get to lay around in my pajamas, and I don't care who you are, that's always fun.    

So, to sum it up... our first real date seems to be going pretty damn good, if I do say so myself.    

The credits on the movie begin to roll and Max clears his throat before looking over at me.    

"Em... I think we need to talk." He says seriously, his eyes locked on mine.    

Shit.    

That statement never leads to anywhere fun.    

"Oh yeah?"    

"Yeah. Listen... I... I haven't been totally honest with you, and it's really starting to bother the hell out of me."    

"Umm... ok." I nod and swallow the large lump that's formed in my throat.    

Great. I finally find a seemingly perfect guy, and he ends up being a liar. With my luck, he's probably married with kids, and has this whole other life in Boston or something. I really know how to pick em, don't I?    

I'm living an episode of fucking 60 Minutes.    

"Yeah... I'm not just here on vacation. My entire trip here was for an interview with a paper. The interview was a couple days ago, and I actually got the job. So, I'm moving to New York. Friday, I'm going back to Boston to get my stuff, and I'll be back in a couple weeks."    

Oh thank you Jesus!    

I was just waiting for him to ask me to become his fifth wife or something.    

"Max... I..." I begin, but I'm quickly cut off by a loud pounding on my front door. "Hold that thought." I mutter and hop off the couch before padding over to the door.     

I swing it open and I don't think anything could stop the frown that's quickly taking up residence on my face.     

You have got to be fucking kidding me.    

"They're all yours." Cooper smirks before pushing Jules and Justin into my apartment, then darting down the hallway.     

The two of them stumble inside, Justin plopping down on the couch next to Max, while Jules ambles down the hallway toward my bedroom.    

Ladies and gentlemen, Cooper Henson is officially a dead man walking.    

"You know... you've got really white fucking teeth." Justin slurs as he studies Max, who's grinning like an idiot.     

I'm glad that atleast he can find amusement in this situation.    

"Comes from good brushing." He chuckles and rolls his eyes. "Well, I think that's my cue. Unless you want me to stay and help..."    

"No, no.. it's fine. Go." I mumble.     

I don't want to deal with these two drunken morons by myself, but I'm not about to subject him to this torture. I mean, I actually like him. I wouldn't wish this on my worst enemy.    

"Alright, well.. I'll call you tomorrow." He smiles and kisses my forehead before letting himself out.     

I don't care how drunk these two are. They have completely ruined my night, and I'm fucking livid, to put it mildly.     

"Happy?" I mutter before throwing a pillow and blanket at him.    

"Fucking ecstatic." Justin grins and gives me the thumbs up. He quickly situates himself on the couch, that shit eating grin never leaving his face. "Em... you shouldn't be getting attached, he's leaving soon you know."    

"That's where you're wrong. He's moving to New York in a couple weeks. And, we were just talking about it before you came barging in here. Thanks a lot jackass."    

"What? No!" He shoots up, a look of panic appearing in his eyes. "He can't fucking move here! That's... that's... that fucks everything up."    

"Excuse me?"    

"He. Cannot. Move. Here." He says slowly and shakes his head. "I was... me and Jules aren't... I was just trying to piss you off, and it was working. He was gonna leave, and you'd want me and..."

Jesus fucking Christ.     

He's a thousand times crazier than I could have ever imagined.     

"I.. I gotta... I gotta go." He mumbles and rises to his feet before stumbling to the door. He jerks it open and staggers down the hallway, leaving me completely dumbfounded.     

I'm surrounded by mental patients. That's all there is to it.     

Justin is fucking insane for coming up with some stupid, hair brained scheme to trick me into wanting him, and Jules is just as crazy for playing along.    

But, there's a small part of me that's kind of flattered by the whole thing.    

Great, I'm just as nuts as they are.  

"You sure you're not mad?"            

"Yes, Jules. I'm sure." I laugh and shake my head. "Now, the part where you guys interrupted a perfectly good date is a whole other story."    

"That was all Coop." She giggles and rolls her eyes. "He totally could have taken us to my place, but he was bound and determined to be a prick."    

"It's cool." I shrug before placing the last pair of jeans on the shelf. "Max already knows you guys are fucking nuts, and he thought the whole thing was quite amusing. Believe it or not, he actually said he likes the fact that I'm so close to my friends."    

"Ah, so we inadvertently scored you some brownie points?" She smirks and nods proudly. "And people think getting plastered and making a fool of yourself always ends badly."    

"The fact that it worked once, doesn't cancel out the other thousand times."    

"You're a real bummer, ya know that?" She chuckles before heading into the backroom.    

I know what you're probably thinking.    

Why the hell am I still speaking to her after the stunt she pulled the other night? The answer is pretty simple actually.    

She's my best friend.    

Sure, it was beyond stupid, but in this cute, overly childish kind of way. And the fact that Max found the whole thing hilarious definitely works in her favor. Although, I didn't tell him the bit about Justin and his idiotic plan.    

A very small part of me is flattered that someone would go to those lengths for me but on the flip side, I'm fairly irritated that he thinks I'm so easy to manipulate. I mean, if I genuinely don't have feelings for him, why would seeing him with my best friend change that?    

Sure, I got a little jealous, but that was more about the attention than wanting to be with Justin. The fact that he seemed to find someone else to harass so quickly just pushed all of my insecurities to the forefront and fucked with my head a bit.    

But, now that I've had a couple days to process the whole thing, I realized that, that was my problem.    

Justin's sudden disinterest in me, and my reaction was just  a reminder that I've still got some major issues with the things that have happened to me in the past regarding the opposite sex.    

But, luckily... my head is now clear, and I'm back to my original stance.    

I do not like Justin.     

And I don't see that changing anytime soon.

**********************    

"Can we talk?"    

I turn around and the first thing I notice is the big, blue puppy dog eyes and frown being shot at me. I fully intended on telling him to leave me alone, but he just looks so damn pitiful, I don't have the heart to be a bitch tonight.    

"Yeah, what's up?"    

"Well...." He chuckles nervously and bites his lip. I'm quickly realizing this seems to be some type of anxious habit of his.    

It's actually kind of cute that someone so overly cocky can be so visibly nervous every once in awhile.     

"I wanted to apologize for the other night. The whole thing was just... stupid and kind of dick, when you think about it. And don't be mad at Jules and Cooper, I talked them into it, so if you're gonna be pissed at somebody... it should be me."    

"Well Justin... I'm not mad." I nod as a smile breaks out across his face. "But... it was pretty fucking stupid, I'll give you that. I wasn't kidding when I said I wasn't interested, and dating my best friend doesn't change that."    

"So it wasn't jealousy I was sensing?"    

Looks like the arrogance hasn't faded one bit.  You'd think someone who's been through what Justin's had to endure the last couple days would turn the ego down a notch or two, but I guess not.        

"Of course not." I lie. "Look... you're a nice guy, but I just..."    

"I know. You've said it a thousand times. But.. you won't have to say it again. I'm giving up the chase."    

"Good to hear. I think you and I are much better suited for the friends route."        

"Probably." He chuckles and rolls his eyes. "I really am sorry Em..."    

"No harm, no foul." I shrug and take a sip of my drink. "Go find yourself a braindead blonde with huge tits, I'm sure the cheesy pick up lines and fame thing will work on that type."    

"Ouch... that was a low blow, don't ya think?"    

"I call em like I see em."    

"Alrighty then." He laughs and shakes his head. "Well... I'm heading out, guess I'll see you around?"

"Sure."    

"Later." He gives me a small wave and makes his way to the exit.     

Now that was just... weird.     

After what happened the other night, I expected one of two things to happen.     

Either I would never see Justin again, or he'd be right back to the stalking and sexual harassment. I most certainly wasn't expecting him to do the logical thing and finally take no for an answer.    

I'm actually pleasantly surprised at this turn of events, and suddenly, I have a new found respect for the guy.    

Admitting you were wrong and acting like an idiot isn't easy for anyone, and I'm sure it's ten times harder when you have an ego the size of a small continent.     

I will say one thing for him though, whether he's saying the lamest shit known to man, or acting the part of respectable gentleman, Justin never fails to surprise the hell out of me.

******************    

I'm beginning to think I may have a drinking problem.    

I consume some form of alcohol almost everyday. Granted, not always to the point of intoxication, but I spend every night at a bar and have atleast one drink.    

Does that make you an alcoholic?    

I sure as hell fucking hope not.    

I love my bar way too much to give it up.    

Tonight though, is a drunk night.     

I have the day off tomorrow, I'm bored, and my semi-boyfriend is in another state, gathering his belongings to come here.    

Getting drunk was pretty much my only form of entertainment for the evening.    

I spot Justin at a table with his friends and I meander my way over, bumping into various tables and other patrons.     

I swear, one day I will learn not to drink hard liquor in mass quantities, but today is not that day.     

"Oh shit... Emma, you alright?" Justin laughs as I stumble up to his table and grip the edge of it for support.     

"Peachy keen, jelly bean!" I giggle and plop down in his lap. "Are you alright?"    

"I'm good. Are Jules and Cooper with you?"    

"They were. But, they're boring and they left."    

"Ok... where's Max?"    

"Boston." I pout and fold my arms across my chest.    

It really is unfair that I got an almost perfect week and a half with him before he had to leave. I mean, what if he comes back and the spell is broken or something?    

What if he comes back and realizes there are people in New York much, much cooler and prettier and thinner than myself?    

"So you're alone then?"    

"Yes sir." I salute him and laugh loudly.    

I think I've finally decided what my favorite part about drinking is.     

You can get away with fucking anything.    

I could strip down to my underwear and dance on a table right now, and nobody would judge me for it.    

Why?     

Because I'm fucking annihilated.     

If people were as accepting and open minded about life and other people as they are of drunken idiots, the world would actually be a pretty neat place.     

"I've gotta get her home man. I'll see you tomorrow." Justin says to his friend as he helps me to my feet and quickly guides me to the exit.    

"I don't want to go home." I yank my arm from his grasp and stomp my foot on the pavement, much like a spoiled five year old.     

"People do things they don't want to, every day. C'mon." He grabs my arm again and pulls me toward the street before hailing a cab. He rambles off my address and our ride is spent in complete silence.     

I'm really not sure why he's suddenly gone all good Samaritan and decided to get me home. I'm perfectly capable of getting there by myself, no matter how smashed I am.     

But, this is yet another one of those times he's managed to surprise me.    

On paper, Justin should have blown me off at the bar. He shouldn't have given two shits about me getting home, or my safety. I'm the girl who spent weeks humiliating him, he should be basking in the glory of my stupidity.    

Yet, here he is, doing the nice guy thing and in the process, making me feel and look like the asshole.     

We make our way up to my apartment, Justin catching me each time I stumble on the stairs.  I'm trying as hard as humanly possible to ignore the butterflies that form in my stomach each time his fingers dig into my hips to keep me from falling on my damn face. It isn't the least bit romantic, but each time he touches me, I get that light headed, dizzy feeling and can't stop smiling.    

Or maybe it's the liquor talking.    

After what feels like hours, we finally make it into my apartment and I don't even bother going to my room. I kick off my shoes and collapse onto the couch, fully prepared to sleep this off.    

"You gonna be ok?" Justin asks quietly as he leans over me, searching my face for any sign that I'm about to throw up.    

"I think so. There's a bucket in the kitchen... can you just...."

"I got it." He chuckles. Within seconds, he places the bucket on the floor in front of me and I smile my thanks. "Alright... I'm gonna go, ok?"    

"Mmhm. Thanks Justin."    

"No problem. Get some sleep."    

He turns to leave and against my better judgement, I grab his hand and pull him back. He looks down at me curiously as I wordlessly fist my hand in his shirt, guiding his face toward mine.    

Before I can even comprehend what I'm doing, I press my lips to his. 

If it was possible to do so, I think I'd kick my own ass right now.     

Kissing Justin. What the fuck am I thinking?    

If there was an official list of the world's stupidest ideas, this would definitely rank in the top three.     

Justin jerks back quickly and stares down at me, an almost amused expression on his face.     

So not the reaction I was going for. I can't lie, I had the slight intention for this to go a bit further, but obviously... Justin isn't that kind of guy.   

"Em... you better get some sleep." He chuckles and backs away from the couch slowly. "I'll see you...later."    

"O...ok." I stutter and shut my eyes, praying for my dizziness and nausea to subside.    

Justin exits quietly and after the soft click of the lock sounds throughout the room, my eyes fly back open.    

Drunk or not... that kiss was completely uncalled for.     

I don't even know what the hell made me do it.    

Maybe it was the liquor. Maybe it was because I'm missing Max just a tad. Maybe it was because Justin was so unbelievably fucking sweet tonight. I mean really, how many guys would do what he just did for me?    

With the way I've been treating him, none that I know of.    

But... no matter how nice he was or how I try to rationalize this, my mind won't stop racing at the speed of light.    

I mean, is what I just did considered cheating, even though Max and I aren't technically together? Is Justin going to get the wrong idea? Does this mean I have a thing for him, and haven't even realized it yet? Why do I always manage to screw myself in the dumbest possible way? What the fuck is gonna happen the next time I see him? Will it be awkward? Is he going to tell anyone? What do I tell Max if Justin does indeed broadcast this to the whole God damn world?    

Jesus... I am entirely too wasted to process all of this right now.    

So for the moment, I'm going to boil it down to drunken stupidity and forget about it until the morning. See... that's the thing about alcohol, it gives you an excuse for everything.    

All I know is, I've got a very bad feeling that I've just set some major shit in motion and every possible ending has the potential to be catastrophic.

******************    

"So what are we having tonight? Shots? Long Islands? Mojitos?"     

"Umm... nah. Just grab me a sprite." Cooper nods in response and turns to head for the bar, but stops abruptly. He spins around and there's no ignoring that horrified look on his face.    

"Emma.. what did you just say?"    

"Get me a sprite?"    

"Em..." He starts calmly, staring me down like I just arrived from another planet.    

"Cooper..." I mock and giggle at him.     

"Oh God...you're fucking pregnant, aren't you?" He shrieks, a slight hint of panic in his voice.    

"What? No!" I laugh as he stands completely still, staring at me in disbelief.    

"Since when do you drink fucking sprite? I want to know what's going on, and I want to know right now."    

"Jesus Coop... take a valium or something." Jules mutters and rolls her eyes.     

You'd think we'd both be used to Cooper and his dramatics by now, but sometimes... it's kind of hard to ignore.    

"I'm just not in the mood." I shrug. "After last night, I'm not feeling so hot. Nothing's wrong."    

"You're sure?"    

"Yes Cooper. I'm sure." He nods slowly, seemingly satisfied with my answer and continues his journey to the bar.    

"What the hell is his malfunction?" Jules chuckles. "I thought he was having a fucking aneurysm or something."    

"Well... we do drink a lot. And you know he's not a fan of the abnormal."    

"Very true." She nods in agreement.    

I should have figured Cooper would lose his shit when he found out I decided not to drink tonight. But... I think my reasoning is perfectly justified.    

Atleast, the explanation I gave him is anyway.    

I do still feel pretty shitty, that much is for sure, but I've drank my way through plenty of hangovers. Luckily, Cooper failed to remember that little detail.    

There are two very specific reasons I'm not drinking tonight and both make perfect sense to me.    

Number one, I am quickly realizing that I drink entirely too much. I may not always get hammered, but the consumption is still there. I basically just needed a night off.    

Secondly, I'm doing everything in my power to avoid a repeat of last night. I don't know if Justin will show up tonight, but I'm not taking any chances.     

Once is a mistake.    

Twice is intentional.    

Anything above and beyond that... well... you're just asking for trouble then.    

And I most definitely don't want or need any more trouble with the opposite sex.     

"Rum and Coke for me. Apple Martini for Jules, and... a Sprite for Shirley Temple over here." Cooper smirks as he places the glass in front of me.        

"Ya know... maybe the fashion industry isn't your calling. I can see a promising future for you as a barista." Jules grins as Cooper flips her off.   

"You're too funny, really." Cooper mutters.     

Before I can throw in my two cents, the door to the bar opens and in walk the last two people I ever expected to see together. Talk about fucking awkward and random.    

Although, I am quite pleased to see one of them, the other is making me a nervous wreck with just his mere appearance.    

Sure, a part of me expected to see him tonight, but I'd really been hoping not to.  

They both stroll up to the table slowly, casually chatting back and forth and the only thing I can think is that I hope like hell they aren't talking about me.     

Honestly, I'd prefer for them not to get within a hundred yards of each other, but this was inevitable. As much as we're all together, this was bound to happen.    

"Hey! You're back!" I nearly squeal as the two reach our table.     

"That I am." Max nods slowly, a smile stretching across his face.    

As much as I hate to admit it, after last night's events... I'd kind of forgotten that he was coming home today. In the back of my mind, I knew. But well... I've been a little distracted with trying not to have a mental breakdown and all.     

I thought being sober would aid in figuring out just what the hell I was thinking last night, but it's confused me even more, if anything.     

I can't come to any form of a conclusion for what I did last night. Sure, I was drunk... but is that honestly the only reason for kissing Justin?    For some reason, I don't think so.     

"So... what's up?" Justin turns to me, a strange, knowing smile planted on his face.   

"Umm... nothing." I shrug and reach for my glass.        

"Not drinking, I see."    

"Seeing as how I'm fairly close to becoming a friend of Bill W's, I thought I'd give it up for awhile."    

"You were pretty fucking gone last night." He chuckles and shakes his head. "Which, I guess is why..."    

"Say it, and die." I glare at him, ready to kick him under the table if he even attempts to finish that sentence.     

"Come on Em... It's really not a big deal. You were trashed. Shit happens. Although... I do hear the truth tends to come out when a person's been drinking."    

"Outside. Now." I growl at him and hop off my stool before stomping to the door.     

Thank God Max is far too caught up with discussing his trip back to Boston with Jules and Cooper to notice us leaving, because I'm not quite sure how I'd explain this.     

"What?" Justin laughs as we step out of the bar, the faint sound of music and car horns echoing around us.     

"You're so dead set on talking about this, so fucking talk. Or are you only willing to do that in front of Max?"    

"Oh come on! He wasn't paying attention."    

"Doesn't matter. Here's your chance to shove my stupidity in my face, so fucking do it. Hop up on your soapbox and spit your bullshit Justin."    

"Fine." He shrugs. "I think you kissed me last night, because you wanted to. I told you I'd back off, and suddenly you want me."    

I open my mouth to respond, but I can't form a single word.    

What if he's right?    

What if I'm just doing the childish, spoiled brat thing and wanting what I can't have?    

Hold the damn phone... I do not want him, and his reverse psychology/jedi mind trick bullshit isn't going to work.     

"It's almost like it's a game to you or something. I chase after you, you blow me off. I stop chasing, and you do everything you can to reel me back in. What do you want from me Emma?"    

Damnit. Why does he have to be so overly fucking honest, and call me on my bullshit?    

Unfortunately, brutal honesty is a trait I find unbelievably attractive, in any man.    

"I... I want... I want..." I swallow hard and do the best I can to prepare myself for what I'm about to do.     

I push him against the brick wall, a little rougher than I intended and snake my arms around his neck. In a split second, my mouth is on his. It feels almost the same way it did last night.    

Confusing. Amazing. Stupid.     

But now... there isn't even a drop of alcohol in my system. I haven't got a single excuse to fall back on this time.     

His fingers dig into my sides and that's when I get that dizzy, lightheaded sensation that only seems to appear when he's around. I break our contact and stare up at him before uttering the words I never thought I'd say to him, of all people.    

"You wanna go back to my place?"        

If this is in fact a game.... clearly, I am not winning.

"Are you fucking bi-polar or something? Jesus." Justin shouts angrily and it's impossible to miss the frustration in his voice. "You can't keep doing this shit to me."    

"Doing what, exactly?"    

"This! Seriously woman... you've got to be the most unstable chick I've ever met. First, it's like you get off by humiliating me. Then you flip your shit when I'm with your best friend, then all of a sudden you want me? What about your boy in there, huh? Or is this about playing both of us?"    

"I...I...I don't know." I stutter dumbly.     

In all honesty, I'd kind of expected Justin to jump at the opportunity to sleep with me. But, he's quickly proving that I know absolutely nothing about him.     

I really am a complete moron when it comes to men. No wonder I get screwed around so damn much.     

"Tell you what Emma... you take a week, and figure it out. Cause this playing around shit is getting really old." He nods seriously before turning and heading down the street, the deep frown never leaving his face.    

Well, shit.    

I can't seem to get this right no matter what I do.     

Blowing him off is wrong. Ignoring him is wrong. Giving in to him is wrong.    

Exactly what the fuck am I supposed to do here?    

Maybe the problem is the fact that I'm starting to give in. What if he was just hanging around for the thrill of the chase?    

I swear to God, men are such idiots.     

You dangle something in front of their faces and they can't leave it alone. But, when you serve it to them on a silver platter, they won't fucking touch it.     

It doesn't make sense, and I'm done trying to figure it out.    

I'm becoming a nun. End of story.

*****************    

Well, I did it. I took a week, like Justin told me to, and I thought about the events of the last month or so, and I've finally come to one simple conclusion.    

Honestly, I should have figured it out ages ago. It's been staring me straight in the face from day one, and I was just too stupid and proud to see it.    

I like Justin.    

There, I said it.         

I finally broke down and admitted what has been so blatantly obvious to everyone but me. I like him. I like the attention he throws at me. I like the fact that he won't hesitate to call me on my bullshit. I like the way he looks at me. I like that my friends like him. I like that he can hold his liquor as well as I can. I just... like him.    

But, there are a few fairly large details standing in the way of me throwing caution to the wind and telling Justin that he's been right all along.     

Number one, pride.    

I've spent so long fighting him off, giving in is almost like surrendering during a war. You don't want to, no matter how badly you should. I just can't stand the thought of him gloating and holding this thing over my head like he's king of the fucking world or something.    

Secondly, my past.    

I have a tendency to just skim over the details of what happened, mostly because talking about it only fuels my hatred for the male species. Sure, I know they aren't all cheating, manipulative bastards like Andrew, but the potential is always there.    

A man is always going to think with his dick. I don't care if he's the most sensitive, caring man to walk this earth. His crotch is always going to do the thinking for him. And usually, that train of thought leads them straight to sleeping with another woman.    

Last, but certainly not least.... there's Max.    

Max is the kind of man a girl can only dream about. He's good looking. He's charming. He's intelligent. He's got a great job, he's respectful, he listens.     He's perfect.    

But... perfection can only carry you so far.    

Call me crazy, but I don't want the perfect man or the perfect relationship.     

I mean, sure... I want all the good stuff, but I want some of the bad too. The fighting, the jealousy, the miscommunication.     

It's just my opinion, but those things make up a real relationship just as much as the good stuff.     

So... now I'm left with a decision.    

I can take the easy road with Max. I can have the boring, mundane but perfect relationship. Which honestly, would make me content, but not exactly happy.    

Or, there is the completely unexpected with Justin.     

Max is the reliable, logical decision. Whereas Justin is.... well... I'm not exactly sure what Justin is.     

Justin is unstable. Justin pisses me off to no end. Justin never fails to shock the hell out of me. A relationship with Justin has the potential to be exactly the kind of relationship I want.     

But, how the hell do I break that to Max? How do I tell this amazing man that I can't be with him because he's just too perfect?    

It's a lame ass excuse, if you ask me. But, it's the only one I've got right now.     

Furthermore, how do I tell Justin that I've finally figured out what I want?     

Fighting him off was easy. Letting him in may prove to be more difficult that I could have ever imagined.     

I'm quickly realizing this is becoming a battle of want versus need. Justin being want, Max being need.     

One of the two is going to have to lose, and it's up to me to decide.     

Unfortunately, I can't ignore that little voice in the back of my head telling me that either way I go, I'm making a partially wrong decision.

I rub the water spots off of my fork, then move to the knife. Finally, after several minutes, I'm satisfied with the immaculate appearance of my silverware, and I move the salt and pepper shakers, making sure they are dead center on the table.     

That's when I notice the tiny black smudge on the pristinely white tablecloth. I pull my stain lifter pen out of my purse and expertly remove the spot. I honestly don't know how the hell the world functioned before these things were created.    

I grab a napkin and fold it into a small triangle before unfolding it and re-folding it into a square.    

Jesus... I need to get a fucking grip.    

None of my fidgeting or borderline obsessive compulsive behavior is doing anything to calm my anxiety.  If anything, it's just making me even more nervous.    

I glance at the clock on the wall and frown. My dinner companion for the evening should be here in roughly five minutes.    

Suddenly, I'm beginning to re-think this entire thing.    

I mean, what if I made the wrong decision? What if the man I've chosen to walk away from could be the best thing that's ever happened to me? What if he's the person I'm meant to be with?    

No... I can't do that. I can't let my mind run wild with all the what if's. I made my choice and I'm sticking to it.     

This is just the way it has to be.    

I can only hope I'm going about this the right way. I called last night and asked him to dinner. It seemed like a nice, neutral thing to do and my mother always told me that if you're breaking up with someone, it needs to be done with just the right amount of tact and in a public place.    

I'm not sure if this actually qualifies as a break up, but I was all for the public place bit.    

Granted, I don't plan on him causing a scene or anything, but you never know with these things. I've come to learn that just when you think you know a person, they'll do something completely unexpected. For all I know, he could turn into the incredible hulk and break a chair over someone's back or something.    

I seriously doubt it, but hey... anything's possible.    

Honestly, I think my biggest battle tonight will probably be the tact thing. I'm a pretty blunt person and there isn't much of a filter between my brain and my mouth. There's no telling what kind of bullshit I'll start spouting off when he gets here.    

I just... I want to do this as gently as humanly possible. I really hate the fact that I have to hurt this amazing man, but it was inevitable. Someone was bound to get hurt in one way or another, he just happed to be the most eligible candidate.     

I'm not proud of what I'm about to do, but it has to be done.    

I finally spot him entering the restaurant and he smiles brightly as soon as he sees me.    

I really am going to miss that smile.     

"Hey." He grins as he plops down across from me after weaving his way through the other tables. "Sorry I'm late."    

"Oh no... you're fine. Not a big deal." I wave him off and force the best smile I can manage.    

Exactly how the hell are you supposed to do this? Do you just jump right into it? Do you do it after the appetizers? Before desert? In the middle of the main course? Or, do you wait until you've both totally stuffed your faces and are in the middle of after dinner drinks?    

Ya know... I'm beginning to think that there isn't an easy or nice way to do this. No matter what is said, or how this turns out... I'm going to walk out of here tonight, feeling like a cold hearted bitch.    

"So, this is a nice change of pace for us, huh?"    

"Yeah, guess so." I chuckle and roll my eyes. "I wanted some peace and quiet."    

"You've definitely got it here." He muses. "This place is great."    

"Good." I nod and browse over my menu, attempting to ignore the way his eyes seem to bore into my skin.    

I wonder if he's got any idea what's coming. I mean, I am kind of blind siding him with it, but maybe... if I'm really lucky, he's already picked up on this intense awkwardness and knows that this isn't going to end well.    

Yeah, right.    

Who the fuck am I kidding?    

I never get that lucky, ever.    

Our waiter arrives and provides a nice distraction while we place our orders and do our best to maintain the casual conversation.    

After dinner.    

We'll eat, we'll make small talk, maybe have a few laughs. And then, I'm going to tell him. I just hope that for once, I can muster up some form of tact and do it the right way.    

Ya know... letting someone down gently is never fun for the person being let down, but I think it's even less fun for the person handing out the let down.    

There's this sense of guilt that comes along with it. It eats at you until you begin to question yourself. It makes you feel like the worst person to ever walk the planet. You have to live knowing you hurt someone.    

And there's absolutely never anything fun about that.    

We make it through dinner exactly how I thought we would. We chat about our friends, family, the city, music, movies, you name it. From the outside, you'd almost think we're on a date.    

And this small, stupid part of me almost wishes we were.    

But... I need to focus on what I came here for. I can't afford to get mushy and sentimental right now.    

Before I know it, both our plates are empty and it's pretty clear that our night is just about over.        

Time's up.    

It's now or never.    

I swallow the large lump in my throat and take a deep breath. Dear God, please just let him understand. Please let him know that I never meant to hurt him, that this was all just a matter of bad timing.     

I was faced with two incredible men, and I had to choose. Had they entered my life months apart, I may not be sitting here right now.    

"So, I've actually got something I wanted to talk to you about." I offer as calmly as I can, even though my hands are visibly shaking.    

This really shouldn't be so damn hard.    

"Oh yeah? Talk away."    

"Well... I...this... I'm....shit." I mutter awkwardly and roll my eyes.    

Why have I suddenly turned into every gawky, nervous, bumbling female character from bad romantic comedies? I mean seriously, all I have to do is come out and say it. It shouldn't be so damn difficult.    

"Em, you alright?" He chuckles at me, an overly amused grin planted on his face.    

I sigh loudly and shake my head, hoping to rid some of the tension I'm feeling. "I asked you to meet me here for a reason."

"Yeah, well... I kind of figured that." He smirks.    

Oh crap... he does know what's coming, doesn't he?    

"Oh?"    

"Yeah... I figured you just wanted to have a date night or something." He shrugs.    

"Well....no." I grimace and shake my head. "I actually...I can't... I can't see you anymore." I say softly, hoping it'll lessen the blow.     

His eyes widen a bit before a deep frown sets in and he nods slowly. "Can I ask why?"    

"There really isn't just one reason. I mean, I..."

"This is about him, isn't it?"    

"He's... he's a small part of it, yes." I nod. "But I swear, I didn't plan on any of this happening. You're a great guy, you really are... and I'm sure, some girl who's much smarter than I am, is gonna realize that. Honestly... you're probably better off without me. I mean... I'm not very nice. I'm a little fucked in the head... I'm a mess.... and you don't want that, believe me."    

"Call me crazy, but yeah... I did." He sighs and shakes his head.       

If I didn't know better, I'd almost swear I can see tears welling up in those deep blue eyes, but there's no way. There is absolutely no way I've reduced this man to tears.    

He's too good for that.    

And too good for me, frankly.    

"So, this is how it's gonna be huh?" He laughs bitterly and rolls his eyes. "That's fine Emma. I can atleast give you credit for being up front about it. Hope he makes ya happy."    

"Could you please just not be so...... nevermind."      

I really am going for the gold in the selfish bitch Olympics tonight folks.      

After what I've just done, what the hell gives me the right to ask for any form of sympathy? Thank God I thought to stop myself before I finished that sentence. Lord only knows how he would have reacted to that.     

"Well... it's been fun Em." He mutters and rises to his feet. "Have a nice life."    

"Justin... I really am sorry. I didn't mean for it to end up this way."    

"Yeah well, shit happens." He shrugs and grabs his jacket before turning and leaving the restaurant.     

I've watched him walk away from me quite a few times since we met, but none of them ever had that strong sense of finality, the way this does.     

As rough as this was, it had to be done.    

Max is the logical decision.     

Max is safe.    

And, if I'm in this for the long haul, that's what I need.

"It doesn't matter. A guy is always going to use it, and a girl will almost always fall for it." Cooper shrugs. "Saying 'I love you' is like the fucking golden ticket to getting into somebody's pants."    

"You're wrong." Jules sighs and shakes her head. "I'm not putting out just because a guy says he loves me. He's gotta work for it."    

My friends are insane, that's all there is to it. They both should have been locked away in padded rooms years ago.    

As you can see, not much has changed this past year. Cooper and Jules are still nuts. I still say and do the dumbest things imaginable. We still hang out at our bar every night, and we still drink ourselves silly.    

It's still us, just a little older....but not necessarily wiser.    

Although, there have been a few tiny alterations.    

For one, Jules quit working in Cooper's shop to go back to school and get a nursing degree. Coop has sworn off men until he opens another store. And me... well... I've finally forced myself to forget the past and get back into the dating thing.    

Being cheated on isn't something you recover from easily, especially when the cheater happens to be the love of your life, and he's screwing your roommate.    

But, I've finally met someone who made me realize there's no point in being hung up on old shit.    

Max is... well, he's fantastic actually.     

He's a little quiet at times, but he really is just a genuinely great guy, the type who still believes in chivalry and all that good stuff. He opens doors for me, he brings me flowers, he notices the little things, like when I cut my hair or wear new perfume. He listens to me bitch when I have a bad day.     

But most importantly, he makes me happy.    

The first few weeks we were officially together, I constantly questioned whether or not I made the right decision, but now I can say with 100 percent certainty that I did.    

Don't get me wrong, Justin had his good qualities as well, but there was just too much of a risk involved there. Justin's the kind of guy who could come out of nowhere and break my heart and I don't want to go through that again.    

With Max, I can see a future.    

With Justin, I couldn't even see where we'd end up within the next 10 minutes.    

That unexpected quality is terrifying. I'm getting older and I need to think long term     

Max is the kind of guy you marry and grow old with. Justin is, well... I'm not exactly sure what the hell Justin is. And probably never will, seeing as how we haven't spoken in a year.    

After the night I told him what I'd decided, I figured he'd still be around, but I was dead wrong. He hasn't been in the store, hasn't set foot in the bar, I haven't even run into him on the street anywhere.    

It's like he just dropped off the fucking planet or something.    

Which is actually kind of sad. A small part of me had hoped we could have been friends. Underneath the arrogance and other assorted bullshit, Justin's a good guy. Maybe not as stable as Max, but he's still a good guy. He's the type you want around when you're bummed out, or need a drinking buddy.    

But, apparently he's decided to cut all ties with me and there isn't a damn thing I can do about it. I hurt him, and I have to deal with the way he's chosen to handle it.    

It sucks that it had to end that way, but I get it. I really do.    

It's a matter of self preservation, I suppose.    

Honestly, had our roles been reversed, I probably would have done the same damn thing.    

"Alright... I think it's time for me to head out." I sigh before downing the rest of my drink.     

It's quickly approaching two a.m., and I desperately need to get home and get to bed if I have any hope of being atleast semi-productive at work tomorrow.    

"Yeah, later Em." Cooper and Jules both nod as I slide out of my seat and make my way to the door.    

I know I need to go home. But, a quick stop at my boyfriend's isn't going to hurt, right?    

Besides, my boss is my best friend, which gives me that wonderful luxury of slacking off every so often.    

I make the trek across town to Max's apartment in record time and smile as the older doorman lets me in, without so much as asking which apartment I'm going to.    

I climb the stairs quickly and dig through my purse for the key as soon as I reach the fifth floor. I enter the apartment quietly and roll my eyes when I'm met with complete darkness.     

I adore the boy, really I do, but he's like an old man when it comes to sleep. He's very into that whole "early to bed, early to rise" thing.     

I guess it's good that atleast one person in this relationship is responsible.     

I open the door to the bedroom and as soon as my eyes adjust to the darkness, I feel like someone just punched me in the gut and knocked the wind right out of me.     

This can't be happening.    

Not again.     

There lays my boyfriend sound asleep, the man I was convinced was the epitome of perfection, with his arm draped around another woman.     

I want to scream. I want to beat the living hell out of both of them. I want to make him feel even a fraction of what I'm feeling right now.     

Instead, I stumble out of the apartment, tears blurring my vision, and exit the building, not even bothering to wave to the doorman.     

Maybe this is just a bad dream.    

Maybe in the morning, I'll wake up and laugh about the whole thing.     

Before I know it, I'm standing in front of yet another white door. I didn't plan on coming here, but my legs seemed to have plans of their own, and here I am.     

Several minutes after I knock, the door is jerked open and the figure in the doorway rolls his eyes impatiently, completely unphased by the tears streaming down my cheeks.    

I really must have been out of my mind if I expected sympathy from him.    

"Can I help you?" He mutters, making no attempt to hide the disdain in his voice.    

"Justin....I...I... I'm...sorry." I choke out and immediately, his expression softens and he moves aside to let me into the apartment.     

Clearly, that "safe" decision I made a year ago, was the absolute biggest mistake of my life.

I sit straight up in bed and look around, not completely sure what to expect.    

Fortunately, I know exactly where I am, and it's exactly where I belong. I look to my left and breathe a sigh of relief at the sight of my boyfriend sleeping peacefully beside me.     

I wish I could understand why I keep having that same God awful dream.    

Deep down, I know damn well Max isn't the cheating kind, but it's always the same. I go to his apartment, find him with another girl, and I go running straight to Justin. The really odd thing though, I never see the girls face and I never actually see them doing anything compromising.    

It doesn't make a damn bit of sense.    

Then of course, there's the bit about Justin.    

Why, after a year, would I go running to him, of all people? If something like that ever actually happened, the only place I'd go to, would be Cooper's.    

It's almost like some sick, twisted tradition now.    

I get dicked around by a man, I go crying to Cooper and we spend three days on his couch, eating ice cream and watching bad romantic comedies.     

That's how the being cheated on, yet again, scenario would play out in reality. But for some fucked up reason, my subconscious is almost pulling me toward Justin. And unfortunately, his sudden appearance in my dreams has got me doing quite a bit of thinking.    

Maybe I'm over-analyzing just a tad, but I can't ignore the sense that this dream is supposed to mean something.    

I just haven't got the slightest clue what.    

Cooper however, seems to think it's my own guilt beginning to eat at me. And when you think about it, I've got a fairly long list of shit to feel guilty about. What I did to Justin, the fact that after a year, I still can't say those three little words to Max, the way Justin seems to invade my thoughts at the most inappropriate times, the fact that I still question my decision.    

Don't get me wrong, Max is fantastic and I genuinely care about him, but I can't ignore the feeling that something's missing.    

When I look at him, I don't feel butterflies. When I kiss him, I don't see fireworks, or stars, or any of the other cliche, sappy bullshit.     

There's just no spark.    

I mean really, I know it could be so much worse. But, I just... I want that spark.    

But, I made my decision and I have to live with it.    

Maybe Max isn't the love of my life or anything, but it's ok. Not everybody gets that fairytale thing. A lot of people settle, and I'm ok with that. I mean, is it really so terrible to settle for a great guy who treats you like a princess? I think not.    

I lay back down and sigh when Max slips an arm around my waist, pulling me against his chest.    

Settling may not be terrible... but it isn't great either.

***************    

"You fucked up." Cooper shrugs. "You knew then, Max was the wrong decision, but you were bound and determined to blow Justin off. You just didn't give a shit. You're too God damn stubborn Emma, that's always been your problem. And now... you're in way too deep to just say 'oh, wrong guy, my bad.' You brought it on yourself."    

"Max isn't wrong... he just... isn't right."I reply lamely, doing my best to justify my own stupidity.    

"Honestly Em, I don't know what you tell you. I could always do the friend thing and say do what makes you happy, but it isn't just about you. I like Max... I like you with Max, and I don't want to see a good guy get hurt because you're being so fucking selfish and stubborn."    

"You didn't seem to mind when Justin got hurt."   

 "There weren't real feelings at stake there." He says simply. "You've been with Max for a year... a fucking year, Emma."    

"I know." I mutter and frown.    

Despite my attitude, I adore Cooper and his ability to lay everything on the table. He doesn't sugarcoat anything, and I need that.    

The only problem is, it's just laying another mass of guilt on my shoulders.     

I have finally come to the realization that I made the wrong decision.    

At the time, Max was exactly what I thought I needed. But even then, a small part of me knew it was a mistake. I guess I just let my fear of Justin and the unexpected take over.     

I am a stupid, stupid girl.     

And now, there's really no way to go back.     

Sure, I could tell Max the truth and risk hurting him, but taking Max out of the picture doesn't mean Justin is going to welcome me with open arms.     

Even a blind man could have seen just how hurt he was after what I did to him. I led him on, I let him chase me relentlessly, I made him believe there was a chance... and then I pushed him aside because I was too stubborn to give in.     

Cooper wasn't kidding when he said I fucked up.     

So, the question now is... where the hell do I go from here?     

Do I push my real feeling aside, suck it up and stay with Max?    

Or, do I take the selfish route, hurt another person, and see where it takes me?    

Most importantly, what the fuck would I even say to Justin?    

It's been a year.    

Guys like Justin don't hold on for too long. I'd be willing to bet he's found someone else, and is probably ten times happier than I ever could have made him.     

But, what if...    

What if he's not seeing anyone? What if he does still hold some small bit of affection for me? Do I really want to risk missing out on that?    

"You should talk to Justin." Cooper says suddenly, almost as if he's reading my mind. "I may not agree with screwing Max around... but... damnit Emma... you deserve to be happy as much as anybody else, no matter how fucking stupid you are."    

He's right, you know.     

I may be stupid, but even idiots deserve to be happy, don't they? 

"Are you kidding? That's the worst idea in the history of thinking!" Jules shrieks as she slaps Cooper's arm roughly.         

"It's the only way she's going to figure this shit out."    

"No, it's not. You're gay, for Christ sake! You have no fucking clue what you're talking about." She mutters angrily before turning to me. "Emma... Don't listen to him, and whatever you do... do not talk to Justin!"    

"Why?" I reply disinterestedly.    

I already know exactly what she's going to say, but I'll humor her none the less.     

The fact of the matter is... I already know what I'm going to do.    

It's taken me a few days, but I've come to some fairly eye opening conclusions about myself and this mess I managed to get into.    

For the first time in my life, I used my brain rather than my emotions, and I weighed the pros and cons. I played every possible scenario out in my head. And, I came up with a plan.    

This plan may not make everyone happy and I'm sure some feelings will be hurt, but this is simply the way things have to be. This is the only way I'll be able to wipe the slate clean and get this off of everyone's shoulders.    

"It's so fucking simple." Jules sighs and rolls her eyes. "You made a decision... stick with it! Obviously, something pulled you toward Max in the first place. That's gotta mean something. Not to mention the fact that it's been a God damn year. For all you know...he could be ready to propose or something. Max has been nothing but good to you and you're gonna dick him over because you've suddenly decided you want what wasn't good enough the first time around? That's not fucking fair Emma. Not to him, not to you... hell, it's not even fair to Justin!"    

"How so?" I ask curiously.   

Clearly, Jules has come up with her own theory as to what I'm going to do about all of this, and obviously... she's thinking the worst. I'm not saying she's right or wrong, but knowing that she's assuming the worst of me, right out of the gate, stings just a bit.    

"How?" She laughs humorlessly and rolls her eyes. "You tell me... how would you feel if someone you were crazy about, shot you down for another girl, then after a year comes back and says they were wrong? A lot can happen in a year, Em. Justin could be a completely different guy now and you want to go barging back into his life because you were too selfish and stupid to see what was right in front of you. Not. Fucking. Fair."    

She's right, and I know that... I do. But... this is my life.    

Yes, the things I'm about to do in the very near future won't affect just me, but basically... I started all of this, and I'm going to finish it.

****************    

"Hey." I smile as brightly as I can manage as the door swings open and I'm met with those amazing blue eyes and that blinding grin.    

He really is too pretty for his own damn good.    

"Hi." He replies as he leans in and kisses me quickly.    

I follow him into the apartment, trying to memorize everything as quickly as I can. The way he smells. The way he smiles at me. His jacket slung over the back of the brown leather couch. The dent he put in the wall when he moved his bed in. The red wine stain on the beige carpet, from one of our many date nights. His keys on the kitchen counter. The jazz CDs I bought him for his birthday, stacked neatly on top of the stereo. His bedroom, where we had sex for the first time. The balcony where he told me he loved me. The drawer he emptied for me to keep extra clothes in.    

Am I really ready to leave all of this behind?    

On my way here, I was so sure of myself, but now that I'm actually standing in front of him, that familiar doubt is starting to creep up on me, and I just don't know.    

What if my thoughts of Justin, is just my fear of commitment coming out? What if I was just so scared of finally having something real that I talked myself into thinking I'd made the wrong decision?    

No.    

As much as I hate to do this... I know.    

I know that Max was the wrong choice. If I'm going to make any of this right, it's gotta start here and now.    

"So... you wanted to talk." He states before planting himself on the couch.    

"Yeah, I do." I nod slowly and take a seat in the chair across from the couch.    

Keeping my distance will hopefully make this a little bit easier and I really need that right now. I need to get through this as quickly and painlessly as I can.    

When I told Cooper what I'd planned to do, he first called me out for being such a fucking moron, but then he told me it'd be just like pulling off a band-aid.    

It's gonna hurt like hell for awhile, but eventually... it'll ease up, and with any luck... I'll know better next time.    

Next time...    

I'm not quite sure what's going to happen the next time I have to do something like this, but I guarantee it won't hurt the way this does.    

Max may not be right for me, but he is an incredible guy and losing him is going to break my heart. But... this is the way it has to be. He deserves so much more than my half hearted attempt at loving him.    

"Em... baby..." He chuckles and snaps his fingers in front of my face. "Ya alright?"    

"Oh yeah... I'm... I'm fine." I force a smile and nod quickly. "I um... I've been doing some thinking the last few days. And I just..." I sigh and look up to find him staring at me intently, that sweet smile still planted on his face.    

This is turning out to be a hundred times harder than I thought it would.    

"Jesus... Max... I am so sorry." I choke out as the tears form in my eyes.    

"Emma? What the hell is going on?" I frown at the worry in his voice and shake my head.    

If he was mad at me, or had treated me badly even once, this would be so fucking easy.     

"I... for a long time... I've... I've been... I'm not as into this relationship as I should be." I stutter.    

He nods slowly, a knowing look passing over his features. "Look, Emma... if this is about the whole I love you thing, I don't have to say it. I just... I felt it and thought you should know."    

"It's... it's not that." I mutter and rub my eyes tiredly. "I... I have feelings for someone else."    

He hangs his head for several minutes, not saying a word. Great... Jules was right. He was probably on the verge of proposing or something, and this is what I do to him.    

If they gave out trophies for the worlds shittiest person, I'm sure I'd receive quite a few of them just for this.     

"You know what's funny..." He laughs sadly and shakes his head. "I think a part of me always knew that. I knew, that first time I met Justin, that there was something there. But... you never said anything and I just... I guess I didn't want to believe it. And when he was suddenly out of the picture... I felt better, but there was still something missing, you know? All this little shit kept adding up, but I refused to see it. By then... I was so far gone, there was no going back. I fell for you, even though I knew there was someone else, so I guess I brought this on myself, huh?"    

"Oh Max... no. No. I'm the bad guy here, ok? Honestly... I don't know what the hell you ever saw in me to begin with. You are so beyond too good for me, it's ridiculous. And.. as much as I'm hating this right now... you deserved the truth. I couldn't keep going when I knew I wasn't in this all the way. That just isn't fair to you."    

"Life ain't fair." He chuckles bitterly and rolls his eyes.    

"This is true. But... ya know... when you're with the right girl, you'll look back and laugh at this."    

"Emma..." He sighs and smiles sadly. "I happen to think I'm with the right girl now... and I sure as hell ain't laughing. But... I appreciate the honesty. I'm just not really sure what you want from me now."    

"Well... that's up to you." I nod and swallow the lump in my throat. "I would love for us to come out of this as friends, but I..."    

"As much as I want to... I can't do that." He shrugs. "I... Emma... I just, can't do that."
    

I nod slowly, biting down on my lip to keep my tears at bay. "I... I understand."    

"Alright then." He sighs and stands up. "I'm... I'm gonna head out for awhile so you can get your stuff." He shoots me one last disappointed look before shaking his head and making his way out of the apartment.     

One down.... One more to go.     

"So, he just walked out?" Cooper asks as he plops down next to me on the couch.    

"Yep." I nod slowly, taking another large bite of my ice cream.        

"Didn't try to talk you out of it or anything?"    

"Not really, no. I tried to tell him I wanted to be friends, but he pretty much just told me to get my shit and leave. Nicer than that of course, but.. you know..."    

"Hate to say it Em, but I really don't blame him."    

"No, I know. I don't either. I don't like it, but I get where he's coming from. If it was me, I probably would have done the same thing. It just... sucks."    

"So what happens now? Obviously, you can't just go running to Justin."    

"Well... I... I don't know." I say simply and shrug.    

The truth is, I really don't know what happens next.    

Yes, I had a plan for all of this, but plans can only take you so far. And it's not like there wasn't any emotion behind breaking up with Max. It hurt like hell, honestly. But, it had to be done.    

It wasn't fair to keep stringing him along when I wasn't feeling the same things he was. I know I did the right thing, but sometimes... the right thing can be the hardest thing. And, as difficult as breaking up with Max was, going to Justin, if I even do it, is going to be a thousand times harder.    

I've got a general idea of what I want to say to him... it's just a matter of timing and actually gathering the nerve to do it.    

The biggest problem is that I haven't got the slightest clue how he'll react. As Cooper and Jules are so fond of reminding me, he could very well be a completely different person now.    

I'd almost guarantee that he moved on ages ago.    

So really, the only thing I can do is suck it up and just go see him. I know there's the potential that he'll laugh in my face but I'd rather suffer that humiliation than go through the rest of my life not knowing.     

I just don't want that kind of regret hanging over my head.

*************    

I stare up at the massive gray building in front of me and let out the breath I've been holding since I left my apartment.    

I don't know what the fuck I'm doing.    

I shouldn't be here.    

This is wrong on so many levels.    

I mean, what kind of dumb bitch does this? I had my shot with this guy and I passed him over for what I thought was the better choice. And I show up a year later to beg his forgiveness and see if there's still hope?    

I have no right to be here, but I let my own selfishness talk me into it.    

Honestly, I don't even really know what I'm expecting him to say or do.     

Maybe I should just go back home and live with the fact that I was wrong.    

But then again, doesn't Justin deserve to know the truth as much as Max did? If anything... Justin should atleast know that he was right.    

I drag myself out of the car and up to the building. My eyes scan through the names on the mailboxes and I frown when Justin's name seems to be missing.    

Great.    

He's fucking moved and I have no way of getting in touch with him. Just perfect.    

But, I know that I totally deserve this.     

I let out a long sigh and move to retreat to my car but stop when I hear the front door open behind me.    

"Did you need help with something ma'am?"    

"Actually, yeah." I force the best smile I can and nod at the older man. "A friend of mine used to live in this building and it looks like he's moved. You wouldn't happen to have a forwarding address, would you?"    

"We might." He nods. "Who were you looking for?"    

Now this is where things could get a little weird.    

With Justin's celebrity status, I'm sure there's some major security involvement here and I guarantee they won't give his new address to some random girl. Chances are good, this man is going to laugh me clear into next week and tell me to get a fucking life.    

"Justin Timberlake." I reply as cooly as I can.    

Maybe if I act nonchalant enough, I won't get blown off as some obsessed, crazed fan.    

"Oh... I really can't give that information out."    

"I kinda figured." I shrug, hoping the defeat isn't showing too clearly on my face. "I swear.. I'm not stalking him. We're just... we're old friends and I haven't seen him in a long time. But.. thanks anyway." I begin the walk back to my car, muttering to myself the whole way.    

I guess this is karma coming back to me, yet again.      

"Miss.... wait." The doorman calls out to me and I stop again.    

"Yeah?"    

"Let me ring Mr. Timberlake's condo. Your name please?"    

"Emma Walker."     

Alright... now I'm just confused.    

If Justin isn't living in this building anymore, what's the fucking point?    

Unless...    

"Good afternoon Mr. Timberlake." The door man chirps happily into the phone. "I have an Emma Walker here to see you.... yes sir..... yes....alright..... yes sir, I understand." He nods and quickly hangs up. "Miss Walker, you'll want to take the elevator to the ninth floor. Mr. Timberlake is in apartment 120."    

I breathe a sigh of relief and smile gratefully at the older man. "Thank you so much."    

The fact that he's actually willing to see me has to be a good sign, right?    

I quickly take the elevator and it's a matter of minutes before I'm standing in front of apartment 120. I straighten out my shirt and smooth my hair down before knocking softly.    

The knots are forming in my stomach at an alarming rate and I'm pretty sure I'm fairly close to throwing up.    

Jesus... this was a horrible idea.    

But, it's too late to back out now. I'm here and... oh shit, the door's opening.    

Justin appears in the doorway, an awkward smile on his face. Even a blind man could see just how uncomfortable he is.    

"Hi Em... long time, no see."    

"Yeah." I chuckle nervously and nod. "How ya been?"    

"Good. Real good, actually." He nods slowly. "Look... I'm just gonna be honest and not screw around... I really don't get why you're here."    

"I broke up with Max." I blurt out before I can even really think about the words leaving my mouth.    

His eyes widen and he chuckles softly, shaking his head. "Maybe you better come inside."        

I nod and follow him into the apartment, glancing around for any sign that there may be a woman in his life at the moment. So far, nothing.    

I ease down onto the couch beside him and an awkward silence settles over us for several minutes before he finally speaks up.    

"So... did something happen?"    

"Not... not really, no." I sigh and shake my head. "For awhile, it was amazing, ya know? He was exactly what I thought I wanted. But... the more time went by, the more I realized I just didn't feel as strongly about us as he did. So, I ended it." I say simply and shrug. "I just... I finally realized that I made the completely wrong decision last year. And I just... I guess I just wanted you to know, and I wanted to apologize. For everything. I was so awful to you and you really didn't deserve it Justin."    

"Can't say I disagree with that. But honestly Emma, it's been a year. I got over all of that, and you, a long time ago. I'm sorry things didn't work out for ya though, really sucks."    

Did he just say he's over me?    

Fuck!   

Deep down, I knew that was probably the case but I still had this small hope that I'd get the fairytale ending, where he'd welcome me back with open arms.    

Guess that's what I get for thinking.    

But... there's only one way to find out for sure. I mean... maybe he's trying to give me a taste of my own medicine.    

I know, I'm reaching... but... I'm just not quite ready to give up on this.    

I clear my throat and settle my gaze on the floor. There's just no way in hell I can look at him and say this.    

"I... umm... I was... I was kind of hoping that maybe... eventually... I thought... Justin... I still have feelings for you." I finally manage to stutter out. "I know, I tried so hard to blow you off, but I was just so damn scared, I didn't want you to get close enough to hurt me. And, I know.. I know that's so fucking stupid, but I'm an idiot and I just..."    

"Shit Emma.... I..." He begins but stops when a loud knock on the door echoes throughout the apartment. "Hold that thought." He mutters and heads for the door.    

I can hear a distinctly female voice chiding him, while he laughs and bags rustle around. A minute later, a pretty blonde pads into the room and smiles brightly at me, but the only things I can focus on, are the massive rock on her finger and her slightly protruding stomach.    

She places the grocery bags in the kitchen and waddles over to me, that dazzling smile never leaving her face.    

"Hey! I'm Kristen." She stretches her hand out to me and I shake it, still in a daze as the various possibilities of exactly what this means race through my mind.    

"Emma... this is Kristen, my fiance. Kris, this is Emma... she's... she's an old friend."    

"It's so nice to meet you! I was just about to fix dinner, you're more than welcome to stay hun." She smiles warmly at me and my stomach turns.    

"Oh.. umm... I appreciate the offer, but I... gotta go. Yeah.. I gotta go." I nod dumbly. "It was nice meeting you though. Justin... I'll see you around." I grab my purse and make sure to keep my head down as the tears begin to sting my eyes.    

I give them one last half hearted wave before I dart out the door and to the elevator.     

I should have just listened to Jules. She tried to tell me what a shitty idea this was, but I just wouldn't listen. Instead, I forced myself to come here and get hurt.    

But, how the fuck was I supposed to know that he'd get engaged and knock his fiance up within a year?    

I'm just about to slide into my car when I hear my name being called. I look up to see Justin jogging toward me and roll my eyes.    

Fucking perfect.    

I should have figured he'd need some more time to gloat about his happiness. I know I deserve it, but damnit... it fucking hurts.    

"Emma..." He smiles sadly and shakes his head. "I'm really sorry."    

"Why didn't you tell me? Hell... why even agree to see me?"    

"Last time I checked... I don't owe you a God damn thing. And, if somebody you were crazy about showed up after a year, you wouldn't want to hear what they had to say?"    

"Not if I'm engaged and have a baby on the way! Jesus Christ, Justin! Did you forget that shit or something? I just made a complete fool of myself!"    

"Like I did for how many months?" He chuckles and rolls his eyes. "What did you honestly expect? I had no fucking clue why you were here, and forgive me for not starting the conversation with 'oh hi, I'm an engaged father to be, so don't throw yourself at me.' Honestly... I thought you were here to invite me to your fucking wedding or something, since Max was so perfect and shit."    

"I gotta go." I mutter and open the door to the car, but his voice stops me yet again.    

"I really am sorry Emma... if you'd shown up six months ago... this would have had a completely different result."    

"What the fuck is that supposed to mean?"    

"Exactly what I said." He shrugs. "She's only about five months along, and we hadn't been together very long when she got pregnant. If... if you'd shown up and said all of this six months ago.. it would have been different. But now.. now there's a baby involved and maybe it wasn't planned or anything... but I'm happy, ya know? This is the kind of life I wanted, and I've finally got it."    

"I get it." I nod slowly, tears now streaming down my cheeks. "She seems great, though."    

As much as it kills me to actually say that, it's the truth. I know if I came home and found some strange woman alone with my fiance, I wouldn't have been anywhere near as nice or welcoming as she was. It seems as though Justin has found himself a woman who actually deserves him and will treat him ten times better than I probably ever could.    

"Yeah, she is." He smiles fondly and shrugs.    

"But.. I... I better go. I shouldn't have come here."    

"It's fine Em. Really. It was good to see you... just wish it didn't have to end like this." He smiles sadly, and I'm doing everything I can to fight back the sobs pulling at the back of my throat.    

"Yeah, well... apparently we can't all live happily ever after."