“Hey J? What’s up man?” Jesse asks me as we shake hands.

“Nothing much man. Just fucking hanging with the guys. Glad you could come out tonight.” I tell him as he smirks at me.

“Yeah, it’s been hard pulling myself away from Cassian. You know how that shit goes.” He says as he pulls out his pack of cigarettes and taps it against the palm of his hand before pulling out a cigarette and lighter, lighting it up as he kicks back in his chair at our table at the pub.

I just nod at him because I really don’t know what’s that like. I haven’t had a girl in forever because I can’t have Cassian. Don’t get me wrong I’ve had a few great fucks, a few good fucks, and some that I rather just not mention but none of them compared to Cassian.

Jesse and I have been friends for as long as I can remember, granted he’s never been my best friend like Trace but we’re pretty damn close. Then he started dating Cassian and things started to change.

Jessie is a friend,
Yeah, I know he's been
A good friend of mine
But lately something's changed
That ain't hard to define
Jessie's got himself a girl
And I want to make her mine

Everyone knows once your boy finds a girl he really likes he stops spending so much time with his boys and the same thing happened to Jesse. Once him and Cassian started dating it was like he fucking disappeared or something. We’d rag on him so hard but then we met Cassian and I knew why he had so much trouble pulling himself away from her. I just fucking wish I had met her first.

You’re probably thinking what’s so special about this Cassian girl? Well, let me tell you what I think makes her so special, it’s the way she treats Jesse. She’s hot as hell but she’d do anything for her man and I want that but more importantly I want that from her.

“What’s she doing now that you can’t come hang with your boys every now and then?” Trace asked as Jesse took a puff and threw the boys his cocky smirk that I’ve come to associate with something naughty Cassian’s done.

“Dude, you don’t even fucking know. My lady’s got this new job so of course being a chick she had to go buy brand new outfits….ah but that isn’t the best part…” Jesse says as we all groan at him at the mention of Cassian shopping, “She had to buy new undergarments to suite her new outfits! So I got a little fashion show from my girl. It was wicked crazy. Her, twirling around in these little bra and panty sets in her high heels. She’s so fucking hot!” He says with a wide grin as he shakes his head and claps his hands together.

Is it bad that I feel so sick to my stomach? She’s his girl, not mine but listening to him brag about his girl makes me sick.

And she's watching him with those eyes
And she's lovin' him with that body,
I just know it
Yeah 'n' he's holding her in his arms late,
Late at night

I want her as my girl. I want her coming home to me and modeling her lingerie for me! I’m holding onto the hope that that will happen because right now she’s still Jesse’s girl.

“Hey Jesse, isn’t that your girl right over there?” Trace asks as we all turn and look over our shoulders.

Sure enough, there’s Cassian standing by the bar with all her friends and I want to groan at how hot she looks. She’s wearing a simple little green halter top with a pair of tight dark denim jeans. Her long dark brown hair is pulled back, half of it pinned back while the rest flows around her shoulders and down her back. She’s wearing those black boots that she loves so much and I just want to pin her against the bar and have my way with her.

She’s laughing at something her friends are saying, sipping casually on her beer, unaware that we’re all watching her. I sneak a look at Jesse who’s biting his lip as he leans back in his chair enjoying the view. Cassian leans against the bar, signaling for the bartender with a crook of her finger and we all chuckle at how the guy jumps to help her. She’s fucking dangerous.

“Well I’ll be damned,” Jesse whispers as the bartender leans closer to Cassian, whispering in her ear as she giggles before pulling away slightly, “Better go claim my girl,” he mutters taking the last puff of his cigarette before quashing it in the ash tray on our table and standing up.

He folds his shoulders before straightening out his frame again, stretching out his leather cut and running his hand over his chin length blond hair before sticking his hand in his pocket. He walks over to her with his slight swagger that clearly shows everyone he’s in charge.

You see, Cassian likes the bad boys. The ones that should be in lockup and not out in the streets walking around carelessly. Jesse’s a good guy but he’s been on the wrong side of the law a couple of times too and he‘s got the scars and tattoos to prove it. I think that just attracts her to him more.

I watch as he stands behind an unaware Cassian, who tries to pay the bartender and giggles when he just waves her money away. He eyes the bartender carefully before stepping up to Cassian and placing his hand on her hip. She whips around, obviously not prepared for the contact, then she relaxes when she sees it’s just Jesse.

I can feel jealousy surging through my whole body as she leans into him and nuzzles his neck with her nose, placing light kisses here and there as his hand moves from her hip to her ass. He’s so damn cocky as he eyes the bartender over Cassian’s head as he fondles her ass, as if he’s saying “she’s mine.” Of course Cassian doesn’t care about the silent standoff surrounding her, she just wraps her arms around Jesse’s neck, pulling her body closer to his.

It tears me up inside knowing that they’re together and that he gets to sleep with her. I try not to think about her screaming his name at night or him holding her in his arms late at night while she sleeps. She should be with me. I want her to be with me.

You know, I wish that I had Jessie's girl,
I wish that I had Jessie's girl
Where can I find a woman like that

Anger washes over me as she lovingly caresses his cheek before pushing back his hair and tucking it behind his ear. Her beautiful green eyes gaze lovingly into his blue eyes as he kisses the tip of her nose and she laughs. The bartender that she was flirting with for free drinks has long been forgotten as she leans up slowly and presses her lips against Jesse’s and I have to look away.

It’s not fucking fair.

“Dude, you’re so fucking obvious! I’m surprised Jesse hasn’t kicked your ass yet!” Trace whispers next to me as I flip him off.

I can hear Cassian giggling and laughing but I’m not looking over there. I can’t fucking look over there. The temptation to see her again is too great and I finally look over.

I play along with the charade,
there doesn't seem to be a reason to change
You know, I feel so dirty
When they start talking cute
I wanna tell her that I love her,
But the point is probably moot

Jesse’s making his way back to our table with Cassian in tow, leading her by the hand. Her green eyes meet my blue ones as she gives me a small wave and a smile before taking a seat next to me.

“How have you’ve been J? I haven’t seen you in forever.” Cassian says as she plays with the label on her beer bottle.

Maybe it’s because I want you to fucking be my girl and I can’t stand to watch you with Jesse?

But I don’t say that.

'Cos she's watching him with those eyes
And she's lovin' him with that body,
I just know it
And he's holding her in his arms late, late at night

“Yeah I know. Class and work keep me busy. How have you been?” I ask her as I lean back in my chair trying to appear nonchalant about the whole thing as Jesse’s hand rubs along her neckline.

“I’ve been good,” she murmurs, all her attention shifting away from me as Jesse whispers something in her ear.

His fingers are tangling themselves in her long brown hair as she leans into him, her soft delicate fingers playing with the snaps on his leather cut. Her head rests on his shoulder as the guys start telling their stories and jacking around.

The guys all start whistling as a pretty tall blonde walks by the table and Jesse smirks as he checks out her ass. Anger flashes through me when I see him openly gawking at someone who isn’t his girl. Cassian’s ten times hotter than that blonde bimbo.

Cassian smacks his cheek softly and glares at him as he chuckles at her because she caught him.

“You’re an asshole.” She says softly as he shrugs his shoulders at her then leans over and kisses her temple.

“You know I love you baby girl. Can’t nobody compare to you girl.” Jesse tells her as she leans into his embrace even further and kisses his lips softly.

“You better remember that you’re mine honey.” She tells him as the guys all started to heckle him.

He just grins at her before replying, “Of course I’m yours. Just like you’re mine,” and flipping off the guys.

I feel so dirty watching as they rub their noses together and kiss slowly. I need to fucking get away from them before I punch my friend for making out with his girl.

Like Jessie's girl,
I wish that I had Jessie's girl
Where can I find a woman,
Where can I find a woman like that

I push my chair away from the table, getting up and stepping away before taking a deep breath. This is too much. I can’t take it anymore. I want her so fucking bad! I’m literally in pain every single time she’s all over him. She should just rip my heart out and stomp all over it, you know just to get it over with and be done with it.

“Hey J, can you get us another bucket of beer?” Jesse asks as he hands out his money to me.

“It’s okay Jesse. I got this.” I tell him as he nods his head at me and puts his money away.

That fucker’s so damn lucky.

I walk slowly to the bar, trying to clear my head and ignore all the drunk ladies trying to hit on me and get me to their tables. I finally make it to the bar and rest my palms against the counter while lowering my head. I feel like I’m fucking suffocating in this place and it’s all because of Cassian.

And I'm lookin' in the mirror all the time,
Wondering what she don't see in me
I've been funny,
I've been cool with the lines
Ain't that the way
Love supposed to be
Tell me, where can I find a woman like that

I freeze as I feel someone’s fingertips lightly walking up my spine, “Why are you so stressed out?”, I hear Cassian whisper as she slides in next to me at the bar.

I peer at her over my shoulder before looking over at the table where Jesse is sitting, shooting the breeze with the boys, “He doesn’t know…about that night,” she whispers as her body presses up against me.

That night, we both pretend like it didn’t happen but she wanted it just as bad as I did. It’s not like she cheated on Jesse or anything, they weren’t official yet but damn if I didn’t want her to choose me after it happened.

“Good. He shouldn’t know about it. Ya’ll weren’t together anyways.” I respond as she lets out a sigh.

“You won’t tell him though, right?” She asks and I shake my head.

We go through this all the time. I haven’t told him yet so why would I? She made her choice and it wasn’t me. It hurts like hell but that’s the reality of our situation.

“You know I won’t tell him. You made your choice after that night and I have to deal with that. If I tell him that’s going to ruin our friendship and we both know I don’t want that. Especially if you don’t want to be my girl.” I explain as she nods softly and bites her lip.

“Everything was still so new J. I just couldn’t make that choice. You understand though, right?” She asks me and all I can do is nod because I don’t understand.

“He gets to be the lucky one. I understand that,” I mutter as the bartender hands me the bucket of beer, “Do me a favor Cassian, take this back to the table? I’ve got to get out of here.” I tell her as she nods and takes the bucket from me.

I make my way to the exit, my stomach sick and my heart in pain. I try to push my way out of the bar, taking a deep breath when I finally make it outside.

I don’t mean to make her feel guilty about her choice. I should have known that she would choose him, at the time they had started to talk, and we, quite honestly, weren’t on the same level like she was with him. She had been curious and so was I but I realize now it should have just ended there.

I make my way to my motorcycle and dig my keys out of my jean pockets. I climb on my bike and put the key in the ignition before rubbing my hands over my face, how did I fucking get to this place where she affects me so bad?

“Justin!” I hear Cassian calling out as she runs up to me and holds out my leather jacket to me, “You left your jacket behind,” she explains as she bites her bottom lip, looking at me with those curious green eyes of hers before smiling softly, “Why are you leaving so soon?”

“You know why Cassian. I can’t fucking pretend like I don’t have feelings for you. If you want to be with him then fine, fucking be with him but I’m not going to sit around and fucking watch it,” I mutter as I slip on my jacket and start to put on my helmet.

“J,” she starts to say.

“Don’t fucking J me. Do you know how fucking hard it is to watch you with him when I’ve had your lips on mine? Do you know how fucking hard it is to deal with the fact that you’re moaning his name at night when I’ve fucking had you screaming mine? Do you even fucking know how much I love you?” I shout at her before realizing where we’re at and how I’m making a scene.

“What the fuck ever J! You think I don’t know about all the girls you’ve had since me! You talk about loving me but yet you fucked Ashley, my best friend, two days later! So don’t fucking pull that bullshit with me!” She shouts at me before turning on her heel and walking away from me.

I climb off my bike in anger, unsnapping the strap on my helmet before I toss aside and on the ground. I grab Cassian’s arm and spin her around to face me as my other hand cups her neck and I push her against the wall.

She doesn’t fight me though, opting to lean forward and trying to press her lips against mine but I don’t let her. I press my body against hers, enjoying her soft moan as she tries to kiss me but I don’t let her again as I nuzzle my nose against her neck, taking in her soft citrus scent. My lips attach themselves to the soft skin of her neck as my hand that is on her arm slips to her hip and around to her ass, pulling her body even closer to mine.

She lets out a soft grunt as her fingers weave themselves into my hair and she tries to tug my head closer to her lips. She pulls my body tight against hers, moaning into my ear as I press against her center. I kiss and lick along her collarbone, stopping to lavish the bare skin exposed by her halter top.

“Kiss me baby,” She moans out as my hand on her neck tightens it’s hold on her and brings her face closer to mine.

I lick my lips as I look into her green eyes before complying with her request and pressing my lips against hers. She wants more though as she tugs on my short curls and I slant my mouth over hers, sliding my tongue against hers as she tries to get closer and closer to me.

The hand that I used to hold her neck travels down her neckline and over her breast as I groped her gently before moving down to her hip. She moans into my mouth as we continue to kiss and my hands grip her ass and pick her up, wrapping her legs around my waist. She smiles against my lips as our foreheads touch until someone behind us whistles and we realize where we’re at.

Her legs unwrap themselves from around my waist as I let her down. She rests her head against my chest and lets out a deep sigh before looking up at me. Her hand caresses my cheek as I lean into her touch before pressing a soft kiss on the inside of her palm, knowing I have to let her go. For now and forever.

We pull away from each other slowly, “I should probably go back inside,” she whispers as I nod at her and she bites her bottom lip, “Let me think about some things J,” she whispers as I nod again and she pulls away from me slowly, still linking our fingers together, holding my hand like she doesn’t want to let go.

“Yeah, you’re still Jesse’s girl. He’s probably wondering where you’re at. Just promise me you’ll think about giving us a try.” I tell her as she nods at me before making her way back to me, swinging our hands together before pushing me up against the wall and kissing me softly.

“You know I will,” She whispers before letting go of my hand and walking back into the bar.

I can’t help but think that after tonight I’ll have Jesse’s girl.

You know, I wish that I had Jessie's girl,
I wish that I had Jessie's girl
I want Jessie's girl,
Where can I find a woman like that, like
Jessie's girl,
I wish that I had Jessie's girl,
I want,
I want Jessie's girl

Jesse’s POV

I know my boys rag on me so much but I’m seriously fucking falling in love with Cassian. I know it started out as just fucking around when we both needed some but now I can’t fucking get enough. She’s become my whole world in a matter of a couple of weeks and it scares the shit out of me sometimes. I think it’s because I know she doesn’t feel the same way about me.

She won’t say shit to me but her and Justin have some kind of tension between them. I don’t know what it is or what happened between them but I can feel it in the room when they’re close together. She has some kind of attraction to him, always seeking him out with her eyes when he’s in the room. I just don’t know if it’s a “I want to be with him” attraction or a “I like him as a friend” attraction.

I can be honest and admit that I’m far more invested in this relationship than she is. I guess that’s why I try to spend as much time with her as possible so that I know she’s not stepping out on me with one of my good friends.

Of course now that’s going to be fucking impossible. Why, you ask? Because I’m a fucking idiot. You see after Justin left we all got super wasted. Cassian tried to get me to stop drinking but I wouldn’t listen to her. So she went to the bar to get me a glass of water and of course the fucking bartender hits on her.

Now when I’m sober I’m a pretty patient man. You can hit on her all you want until she either gets annoyed and gives me the signal to step in or you fucking put your hands on her. When I’m drunk though, it’s a completely different fucking story. I won’t even handle you fucking looking at my girl. So when that pussy of a bartender leaned over the counter and started fucking whispering in her ear I fucking lost it.

I went ape shit on his ass. I lunged over that bar so quick, mother fucker didn’t know what to do! He sure knew how to beg for mercy once I started pounding his face in. You should have seen him all huddled up and shit! I bet that mother fucker won’t hit on my girl ever again.

It’s bittersweet though, yeah I fucked him up but my ass is the one that got thrown out of the bar and put into jail. When the fucking pigs saw my record they didn’t hesitate to decorate my wrists with those fucking handcuffs. So now I’m in County waiting for my time in front of the judge. This isn’t going to go well for me.

Cassian’s fucking pissed as hell too. It’s a fucking shame too because I used my one call on her ass and she fucking refused to pick up her phone. I was going to leave a message in her voicemail box until I heard her fucking outgoing message.

“Jesse you can fucking rot in jail for all I care. Thanks for being a dumbass. Have fun spending the next twelve months in lockup. Beep.”

Damn, she sure did change that message fast.

The sad part of this all is that she’s fucking right. Because of my record I can guarantee I won’t have the money to bond myself out and I’m not making my girl co-sign for me. Plus this is my third strike. It’s like I was fucking asking to be locked up again! I know Cassian won’t wait twelve months for my ass. Why should she?

She’s a fucking beautiful girl that can have any man she wants. She chose me on the condition that I would keep my shit together and here I go fucking blowing it. It’ll be a damn miracle if she sticks around. I’m praying like hell though because I love the girl. I love her more than she’ll ever know and if she’s still with me at the end of this I’m asking her to marry me.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“Collect call for Cassian from Inmate 55765. Press 1 if you accept.”

“Cassian?” I ask as I hear breathing on the other side of the line.

I’ve been calling her everyday for the past month and not once has she answered. I know she’s pissed at me and I honestly don’t know if she’s planning on staying with me or not because I got more than twelve months I got eighteen.

“Yeah. I’m here.” She sighs into the phone and I let out a relieved breath that she finally answered my calls.

“I’m sorry to be calling you so late and out of the blue. It’s the only time I could use the phone.” I whisper as I cup the receiver in my hand and lean against the small phone booth.

She got the call today
One out of the gray
And when the smoke cleared
It took her breath away

“What do you want?” She snaps and I pull back away from the phone in shock, “I’m sorry. I just didn’t think it’d be you calling…again.”

She obviously doesn’t want to talk to me.

“I’m sorry baby girl. I know I’ve said it before but you have to believe me,” I say into the phone as she sighs, “I-I need you. Tell me that we can make this work.”

“And how do you expect to make this work Jesse? You’re in jail! Was it worth beating up that guy?” She asks and I can hear her voice cracking, “I-I…I just don’t know if we can make it work,” she whispers into the phone.

“If we really try it will.” I respond as I hear her sniffle.

“I-I just didn’t believe it would happen to you. I-I…not eighteen months Jesse.” She says and I can hear the tears in her voice and it tears at my heart.

She said she didn't believe
It could happen to me
I guess we're all one phone call from our knees
We're gonna get there soon

I run my hand over my hair, listening to her silent cries and it breaks my heart. I can see her now, sitting all alone in her bedroom, crying because I not there beside her because I couldn’t control my temper.

“I love you Cassian. I need you to help me get through this. You’re my rock. I promise I’ll be better for you. Once I get out you’re going to see a new me.” I tell her as she sighs again.

If every building falls
And all the stars fade
We'll still be singing this song
The one they can't take away

“How are we going to do this?” She asks me in a quiet voice and my heart soars at the possibility that we can make it through this.

“You can always come and visit me baby. I can always call you too every day. I promise I’ll call every day.” I tell her.

I'm gonna get there soon
She's gonna be there too
Cryin' in her room
Prayin' oh, Lord come through
We're gonna get there soon

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Cassian,

I know I messed up. This is not how I wanted to start my letter to you but I need to admit the truth. Every day that passes I sit in this dark cell and think of you. I promised to call every day and I have even if you haven’t been there to answer. I wonder what you’re doing while I’m in here every day too. I’m still waiting for that visit from you but I know how hard this is on you.

Oh, it's your light
Oh, it's your way
Pull me out of the dark
Just to shoulder the weight
Cryin' out now
From so far away
You pull me closer to love
Closer to love

I don’t expect you to understand why I did what I did but just know that I only had the best of intentions in hitting that guy who was hitting on my girl. You know my temper, sometimes I don’t think it’ll ever change but all I can say is that I’m working on it. They have this therapist in here, she’s real good baby. She makes me think, you know?

You’re on my mind all the time. I love you so much. I could try to be the badass that you love right now and act like I don’t give a fuck but that isn’t the truth. The truth is I’m so scared you’ll leave me. I’m so scared I’ll get out of here and you won’t be there too. So I’m going to keep calling, keep writing, keep waiting for a visit because it’s all I can do to prove how much I love you while I’m in here.

Even if you never answer my calls, even if you never write me back, even if you never come visit me just know that I will always love you. So if this letter finds you and speaks to you like I’m hoping it will, meet me at Lake Michigan when I get out at that little spot that we used to ride the bike at. I’ll be waiting for you. I’m leaving the decision to be there or not in your hands.

Meet me once again
Down off Lake Michigan
Where we could feel the storm blowin'
Down with the wind

Please don’t cry for me and don’t apologize for those tears that you’ve already shed. You’re so strong and you’re my rock. I love you baby. I can’t say that enough. Each day I fall more and more in love with you. I’d love to hold you right now.

And don't apologize
For all the tears you've cried
You've been way too strong now for all your life

I keep wishing that I had just had enough sense to walk away that night because I’d still be out there with you. Not writing this letter begging you to stay. I’m just asking for another chance. Another chance to show you that I can be the man that you need because in this world of darkness you are my light. My salvation, maybe that’s me being dramatic but that’s how I feel about you.

I'm gonna get there soon
You're gonna be there too
Cryin' in your room
Prayin' Lord come through

We're gonna get there soon

Oh, it's your light
Oh, it's your way
Pull me out of the dark
Just to shoulder the weight
Cryin' out now
From so far away
You pull me closer to love
Closer to love

So I’ll be waiting for you. I love you and I miss you.

Love,

Jesse

P.S. You are all that I’ve waited for all of my life.

Cause you are all that I've waited for all of my life
(We're gonna get there)
You are all that I've waited all of my life

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Cassian steps into the visiting room and I wish there wasn’t this piece of glass separating us. She looks so good in her tight jeans and white cotton t-shirt with her badass little black leather jacket on. She’s so fucking beautiful it takes my breath away sometimes.

She sits down in the seat and picks up the telephone holding it to her ear as she peers at me through the glass. She crosses her legs and gets comfortable before throwing me a small smile.

I can’t help but grin at her as I take in the sight of her. Damn, I fucking missed seeing her beautiful face. Her green eyes sparkle even in this dark visiting room as I pick up the receiver.

“Hey baby girl. You’re a sight for sore eyes.” I tell her with a smirk as she giggles before rolling her eyes at me.

“I got your letter.” She says as I nod at her and take in the image of her.

“I meant every word of it.” I tell her as she nods and bites her bottom lip.

“I know you did. It’s just so hard Jesse.” She tells me as I let out a sigh and run my hand through my hair before cocking my head to the side and placing my hand on the glass.

“Put your hand on the glass baby.” I tell her and she scoffs before looking at me.

“Are you serious? That’s so cheesy Jesse.” She tells me as I laugh and smirk at her.

“Put your damn hand on the window woman.” I tell her with a chuckle as she rolls her eyes before putting her hand on the glass against mine, “I love you and we’re going to get through this. I promise.”

You pull me closer to love
Closer to love
Pull me closer to love (You are all that I've waited for)
You pull me closer to love
Closer to love
Closer to love (Cause you are all that I've waited for)
Closer to love

Pull me closer to love

I really don’t know what to do lately. Jesse’s in lockup for eighteen months and I honestly don’t know if I’ll be able to take it. I told him I would try because after reading his letter I felt bad for not answering his calls or going to see him. Truth be told I was sulking. I’ve finally figured out my feelings for Justin but that doesn’t matter because I heard he’s dating some new girl. Actually calling her his girlfriend and shit! I guess he didn’t love me like he claimed too. He didn’t even wait! I heard he asked her out that very night he kissed me at the bar!

I guess that’s why I’m trying to give Jesse another chance, he’s a sure thing. I know he loves me and only me. His letter definitely proved that to me. The problem is that I just don’t feel that passion with him like I do with Justin. I guess I should be grateful that Jesse and I are taking a break while he’s locked up maybe then Justin will dump his bitch of a girlfriend and give us a chance.

Hey, hey, you, you, I don’t like your girlfriend

No way, no way, I think you need a new one

Hey, hey, you, you, I could be your girlfriend

I don’t know what I was thinking! I should have just waited for Cassian’s answer but I didn’t. I asked out some random girl I met that night after I left the bar and now she’s my girlfriend. Had I known Jesse got locked up I wouldn’t have done it. Now I’m stuck with Brenda.

Rachel, my cousin, told me that Cassian’s hurt. That if I just would have waited she would have chose me but since I didn’t she’s going to try and make things work with Jesse. Now I’m kicking myself every single time I see her because she looks at me with those bright green eyes, questioning why I couldn’t have just waited because then she wouldn’t be Jesse’s girl anymore, she’d be mine.
I fucked up. That’s pretty plain to see.

Maybe I can change all of that tonight though. We’re all going bowling tonight so my “girlfriend” can meet all my friends. Cassian’s coming too after much begging and pleading from me she finally agreed. I know that if I can just talk to her maybe we can start all over again and she’ll leave Jesse to be with me.

Hey, hey, you, you, I know that you like me

No way, no way, you know it’s not a secret

Hey, hey, you, you, I want to be your girlfriend

I take a deep breath before pushing open the door to the bowling alley and walk inside. Everyone’s meeting here tonight to hang out and meet Justin’s new girlfriend. I really don’t care who the stupid little bitch is nor do I want to meet her but I couldn’t say no when Justin called and asked me to come. So here I am, forty-five minutes late but hoping this night goes by fast because if I have to watch him with someone else I just might jump the bitch!

We’ve been here at the bowling alley for forty-five minutes now and so far Trace, Matt, Marty, Nick, Rachel and Brenda have arrived but Cassian’s MIA. I really hope she shows up. It’s almost desperate how bad I need to see her. I let out a sigh of relief as I see her entering the bowling alley. She looks so good in her tight dark denim jeans, teal t-shirt and black leather boots. Damn she sure is working that black leather jacket too. It kills me when she curls her hair and wears it down. She’s so fucking beautiful.

I know I’m probably drooling in front of my girlfriend but I don’t care. Cassian fucking deserves it. Besides I know I’m not the only male staring at her. She’s always been the type of girl that can wrap any man around her little finger.

I see Trace waving wildly at me and I laugh as I make my way over to the group. I tuck my hands in the pockets of my leather jacket as Justin turns around and faces me. 
He always looks so damn good. He had his short curls when we were at the bar but those have long been chopped off, replaced by a smooth buzz cut. He makes me sick with how delicious he looks sometimes. I swear I could eat him up right now. I especially love those dark denim jeans that fit him so good. Jesse’s are always so baggy and I hate that. I love that black button down shirt on him so much that I wish I could wear it in the morning and nothing else. He rolls up his sleeves as I approach and his head ducks down as he runs his hand over his head. He’s so fucking hot!

You’re so fine, I want you mine, you’re so delicious

I think about you all the time, you’re so addictive

Don’t you know what I can do to make you feel alright?

Alright, alright, alright

I smile at him and wave before letting Trace pull me into a hug, “Don’t be mad at my boy. He’s not serious about her,” Trace whispers into my ear and I nod against his shoulder.

If he wasn’t serious about her then why is he dating her?

I just don’t understand his actions but I’m not one to talk. I’ve been on the fence between him and Jesse for six months now. I’m just as much as a pussy as he is.

“Hey Cassian,” Justin tells me as he opens his arms and I hesitate before stepping into his embrace, “You look good,” he whispers into my ear and I swear I just shivered.

I breathe in his scent, sighing against him as he squeezes his arms around my frame.

I’ve missed him so much. I wish he was my man.

“Thank you. You look good too.” I whisper against him when there’s a tap on his shoulder.

Don’t pretend, I think you know

I’m damn precious

And hell yeah, I’m the motherfucking princess

I can tell you like me too and you know I’m right

I pull away from Cassian slowly, watching her with my blue eyes carefully before I turn my attention to Brenda.

Brenda’s so nervous because she wants to make a good impression, especially on Cassian and Rachel. Rachel’s done nothing but talk about how great Cassian is and how they’re best friends and of course Brenda wants to be friends with them too. Although I’m sure the last thing on Cassian’s mind is becoming friends with my girlfriend especially with the way she’s staring down Brenda right now.

“Cassian, this is Brenda…my girlfriend. Bren, this is Cassian, Jesse’s girl.” I say as Brenda holds out her hand for Cassian to shake.

“Jesse’s ex-girlfriend.” Cassian says as she waves at Brenda and throws her tight smile, leaving her hanging.

Brenda awkwardly pulls her hand back and all I can do is shake my head at Cassian.

How could he seriously fucking be with her? She’s so damn plain! From her limp brown hair to her pale complexion! The girl looks like she’s wasting away. Seriously, someone get her a damn hamburger! She’s nothing special and that pisses me off further. He fucking replaces me with her! I know I sound like a bitch but right now I just fucking don’t care. Let me have my damn temper tantrum for five fucking minutes!

She’s like so whateve

rAnd you could do so much better

I think we should get together now

And that’s what everyone’s talking about

“It’s so nice to meet you. Rachel talks about you all the time! I was so excited when I found out you were going to be joining us tonight.” Brenda or Bren, whatever the fuck her name is, says to me and I fake a smile.

“That’s great,” I mutter as I turn to Trace, “Where’s Rach?” I ask as he shrugs his shoulders at me, “I’m going to go get my shoes and a beer.”

I take off in the direction of the shoe counter before either of them can say anything. I know I’m being an unsociable brat but it really fucking hurts to see him moving on and to know I have no one to blame but myself. I should have called him that night and told him how I felt but I’m so scared. I’m scared shitless of how I feel about him.

Hey, hey, you, you, I don’t like your girlfriend

No way, no way, I think you need a new one

Hey, hey, you, you, I could be your girlfriend

“Hey girly! It’s so good to see you here!” Rachel says as she hugs me at the shoe counter.

“I really just want to go back home Rach.” I confess as she hugs me tighter.

“Why? Don’t say because of that Brenda chick. He doesn’t even like her.” She tells me as we get our shoes.

“Yet she’s his girlfriend! I want that to be me!” I tell her as we head to the bowling ball rack with our shoes in our hands.

“What about Jesse? Have you told him?” She asks me as we pick out our bowling balls.

“No. He wants me to meet him at the end of his eighteen months and tell him then. I guess if Justin and I ever get our shit together I’ll let him know then.” I tell her as she nods.

Hey, hey, you, you, I know that you like me

No way, no way, you know it’s not a secret

Hey, hey, you, you, I want to be your girlfriend

“That was weird. I wonder why she wouldn’t shake my hand?” Brenda asks as the guys snicker and I want to smack each and every one of them upside the head.

Obviously I haven’t told Brenda about mine and Cassian’s history and I don’t think now would be the best time to tell her anyways.

“She’s just protective over J. She’ll get used to you.” Trace says as I nod.
Thank God for my best friend.

I watch Rachel and Cassian as they get their shoes and pick out their bowling balls. I get my bowling shoes on quickly before making my way over to Cassian’s side. My fingertips graze along her hip as she squirms and giggles before swatting me in the chest. She’s always been so damn ticklish.

“What do you want Justin?” She asks as I lean against her and pin her against the bowling ball shelves.

“You.” I whisper into her hair as she laughs.

“You sure have a funny way of showing that. Shouldn’t you be pressed up against your girlfriend?” She asks as she grips the shelves as I lean more of my weight against her.

“Nope,” I whisper behind her ear before nibbling on her earlobe, “I could fuck you so good from behind right now.”

I can feel the shiver that just ran through her body as I said that right before the sharp elbow to my side. I pull away from her as she grabs her bowling ball and passes by me.

“You know J?” She says as she turns around to face me, “Maybe if you didn’t have a girlfriend I would have let you.”

I let out a frustrated growl as her and Rachel just laugh before walking away from me and back to our group.

I can see the way, I see the way you look at me

And even when you look away I know you think of me

I know you talk about me all the time again and again

So come over here, tell me what I want to hear

Better yet make your girlfriend disappear

I don’t want to hear you say her name ever again

(And again and again and again)

Rachel and I sit down beside one another and put on our shoes as Brenda watches us. She’s kind of creepy. I know she’s just trying to fit in but don’t stare at me with your plain boring eyes. I hate her, I really do.

She’s like so whatever

And you could do so much better

I think we should get together now

And that’s what everyone’s talking about

“I say we should play in teams.” Trace suggests as Rachel starts to enter our names on the screen.

“We could do boys against girls but J could be on our team to even us out.” Brenda suggests and I can’t stop my eyes from rolling at her lameness.

“Yeah, we can do that.” Rachel says as she elbows me in the side and I toss her a glare.
I don’t want to be on this bitch’s team.

“Be nice.” Nick whispers as he throws his arm over my shoulder and I laugh as he tickles my side.

All of a sudden he’s shoved away from me and Justin wraps his arms around my waist, “You stepping out on me little girl?” he asks in a whisper as I lean back into him.

“Oh yeah. Nick was just too irresistible.” I say with a giggle as he nuzzles my neck.

His little bitch of a girl is standing there watching us with her arms crossed and a pout on her face. That’s right bitch, sulk all you want. Your man likes me and he’s wrapped around my finger.

“I’m telling Jesse.” He sings into my ear and I laugh.

“Go ahead. We’re not together while he’s locked up.” I tell him as he digs his head into the crook of my neck and lets out a low growl.

I swear my panties just flooded. I need him so bad.

Hey, hey, you, you, I don’t like your girlfriend

No way, no way, I think you need a new one

Hey, hey, you, you, I could be your girlfriend

Damn! Cassian’s fucking dangerous now that she’s single. I know that my girlfriend is watching us but I really just don’t fucking care! Cassian’s officially single! I know that saying, “Bros before Hoes” but Cassian’s the exception to the rule. I know for a fact all my buddies would stab me in the back to get a piece of Cassian but lucky for me she doesn’t want any of them.

“I think we should start playing! Don’t you think so JUSTIN?” Brenda asks me as my head snaps up while my boys all laugh at me.

I reluctantly let go of Cassian and smirk at the pout that now adorns her beautiful face. She wants me. I wait until Brenda turns away from us to make my way back over to Cassian and kiss her cheek softly, causing her to smile at me.

Hey, hey, you, you, I know that you like me

No way, no way, you know it’s not a secret

Hey, hey, you, you, I want to be your girlfriend

Bowling is hella fun tonight but it’s mainly because Cassian keeps touching me. Every single time I make a strike I get a high five and hug and she’ll usually slip in a kiss on my neck or my cheek. When Brenda’s bowling though, Cassian’s hands get frisky. At first it started out as her massaging my shoulders, then her hands slid down my chest and under my shirt, now…now she sits by me and caresses my knee or cups me through my jeans. It seems like everyone knows it’s happening too, except for Brenda.

I almost feel bad for Brenda. I mean I’m basically making a fool out of her in front of my friends. Cassian hasn’t made the night easier for her either. She’s been glaring at Brenda all night long, even going as far as to spill her beer “accidentally” on her jeans when Brenda tried to kiss me. I’ll just be honest, Cassian’s being a fucking bitch to Brenda right now and it’s kind of making me hot!
I let out a sigh as Brenda gets up to bowl and Cassian’s hand moves up my thigh. Her and Rachel are giggling about something and I just want to pull her onto my lap and fuck her right her in front of everyone. I smile to myself as Cassian’s laughter get louder and it’s joined by the rest of the group.

My head snaps up as Brenda lets out a frustrated growl. She’s standing with her hands on her hips, the bowling ball long forgotten as it rolls slowly down the lane. She’s guaranteed to make a shot though since the kiddie bumpers have been raised. I can’t help but laugh along with our group but when Brenda glares at me I stop.

“I know YOU did this!” Brenda shouts as she points at Cassian who stops laughing only to glare back at Brenda.

Hey, hey, you, you, I don’t like your girlfriend

No way, no way, you know it’s not a secret

Hey, hey, you, you, I want to be your girlfriend

I really don’t know who this bitch thinks she is, pointing her finger at me. Okay so yeah, I’ve been glaring at her all night and I might have, maybe, just a little bit, “accidentally” spilled my beer on her jeans but I did not have them raise the kiddie bumpers. I wish I did though because that shit was hilarious!

“It wasn’t me.” I tell her as I stand up and cross my arms.

Let’s see how far she wants to take this.

“Bullshit! I know it was you! I see you eyeing my man! Don’t you fucking have your own man? Oh…that’s right…he’s a fucking convict! Only a convict would date trailer trash like you!” Brenda screams at me and I just smirk at her.

“Am I supposed to be offended by your little rant? Because I’m not,” I tell her as I approach the lane to stand in front of her, “And don’t yell at me about eyeing your man because your man has been pushing up on me all night long,” I tell her as I step closer to her and she takes a step back, “And who can blame him? Look at me and look at you. Besides he already knows how well I can scream his name and make him come!” I say as I put my hands on my hips and stare her down.

“You’re such a whore!” She screams as she tries to stomp pass me and her bowling shoes cause her to slide and fall on the slick bowling lane.

I can’t stop laughing at her as she tries to get up only to fall back down again. Serves that evil whore right! Nobody tries to take what’s mine. 

Everyone’s laughing, even Justin when he tries to help her up. She swats him away though and he clutches his belly in laughter as she falls back down again

.
He tries to help her back up again as she yells at him, “Get away from me! I hate you and her and your stupid friends! We are so through! Don’t ever talk to me ever again!” She continues to shout as she finally gets up and gathers up her stuff before turning in her shoes and leaving.

“Damn Rach! Your little stunt ran off Justin’s girlfriend!” I tell her as everyone laughs.

“No little girl. My girlfriend’s right here.” Justin tells me as he wraps his arms around my waist and kisses my lips softly.

Oh

In a second you’ll be wrapped around my finger

Cause I can, cause I can do it better

There’s no other So when’s it gonna sink in

She’s so stupid 

What the hell where you thinking?

Cassian’s so fucking hot! I know I say that a lot but seeing her now in her lace bra and matching lace boy shorts is driving me insane. It’s really not fucking fair that Jesse got to have her as his girl for so long but she’s here with me now.

“Come here baby.” She tells me as she crooks her finger at me, beckoning me closer to her.

I approach her slowly, drinking in her tight figure with my thirsty eyes. My hand grips her hip as I pull her body flush against mine. She lets out a soft moan before wrapping her arms around my neck. She bumps her nose against mine before smiling up at me, happiness sparkling in her green eyes. I’m fucking over the moon about the fact that’s it me making her happy and not some other guy. 

My large hands caress the smooth expanse of her back as her lips attach themselves to my neck. I flick the clasp of her bra open and she slowly removes it from her body, tossing it into the room as I let out a deep groan.

I pull Justin further into my bedroom before walking past him slowly to shut the door behind us and lock it. As I turn to face him he roughly pushes me up against the door and I let out a soft groan as my back hit’s the door.

Justin’s fingers hook into my lace boy shorts as he slowly pushes them down my legs. I let out a moan as he sucks on my neck, my hands grip the back of his undershirt, his button down shirt long discarded into the recesses of my bedroom. He pulls away only long enough for me to remove his undershirt.

I let out a squeal of surprise as he lifts me up and wraps my legs around his waist before attacking my neck again with his mouth. The hand he has on my ass keeps me in place against him while his other hand moves in between my legs. I’m panting against his ear as his thumb rubs against my clit sweetly. My body starts to squirm against him as his fingers run gently up and down my wet slit. 

“Baby please,” I beg as his mouth moves down to kiss along my collarbone.

“Please what, honey?” He asks before taking my nipple into his mouth and sucking on it.

“Justin! Please touch me!” I groan out as my hands grip his head and pull him closer to my chest.

I can feel his smirk against my skin before he runs his tongue over my nipple and pulls away from me, “Touch you where? Do you mean right here little girl?” He asks as one of his wonderful fingers enters me.

“Yessss,” I hiss as his finger curls inside of me and his thumb presses against my clit simultaneously.

“Oh, that’s what you want…I got it now.” He says quite cockily before inserting another finger.

I can’t think of a smart comeback as he stretches his fingers inside of me and I see stars. He’s so damn good at what he does. He’s the only one who can make me beg for it. My hips are bucking wildly against his hand as he moves his fingers in and out of me and while I’m enjoying the feelings coursing through me I wish his dick was inside of me.

“Justin!” Rips from my throat as he hits my spot and I can feel his lips against my collarbone as I hold onto him, “I want to feel you!”

He lets out a groan as he pulls away from me slightly and I reach down to undo the button on his jeans. I get his zipper down too as he kicks off his shoes and his jeans fall to the floor. 

I let him carry me to the bed and he gently lays me down before slowly removing his boxer-briefs and socks. His blue eyes are watching me closely and I wonder what he’s thinking before he climbs on the bed.

Oh

In a second you’ll be wrapped around my finger

Cause I can, cause I can do it better

There’s no other

So when’s it gonna sink

She's so stupid 

What the hell where you thinking?

Cassian’s fucking beautiful. She’s just laying there in all her naked glory and I can’t take my eyes off of her. She was beautiful when we first hooked up but that’s all it had been, just a hook up. She was never really mine. Now though, Jesse’s out of the picture and she’s laying on her bed as m girl, waiting for me to love her!

My lips attach themselves to her exposed neck as my hands run up and down the smooth skin of her thighs before I spread her legs and nestled myself in between them. She lets out a few soft pants before wrapping her legs around my waist. It makes me hella hard knowing that she wants this just as much as I do. Her fingernails are digging into my back as I position myself at her entrance.

I let out a low growl as I push in her and let her walls squeeze me as I stretch her out. Her fingers are tugging at the curls on the base of my neck as she lets out the softest moan. Her legs wrap around me tighter causing me to sink into her deeper. She whispers my name softly as I bury my head into the crook of her neck.

“Justin please,” She begs as I pull back slowly before slamming into her roughly, “Oh God yes!”

She feels so damn good. Her hands are clutching at me, trying to grab onto my shoulders as I set a steady pace that has her panting for more.

“J! Please…more…ugh….faster!” Cassian begs as her hips move against mine, meeting me thrust for thrust.

I grit my teeth as she squeezes and unsqueezes around me, causing my eyes to roll into the back of my head at the sensation.

“Cass, don’t. I wanna make this last.” I grit out before I capture her lips with mine.  
Justin’s mouth feels so good against mine. His dick feels so good in me. I grip onto his short curls as my hips meet his again and his hipbone presses against my clit. I let out a loud groan but he swallows it with his mouth. I grab onto his strong shoulders as his lips attach themselves to my neck, sucking and licking as his hips drive me insane.

I can feel that sweet feeling coiling in my belly as he pushes deeper and deeper, hitting my spot over and over. I need more of him, not just tonight but every night. It’s never going to be enough.

 
My walls squeeze him tighter and tighter as my toes start to curl and my nails dig into his shoulder blades. The small grunts coming from him are driving me over the brink as they mix with my pants and moans. He grabs onto the headboard, getting more leverage as he pounds into me.

It’s too intense, too much as he goes faster and faster, chasing his release and giving me mine. I scream his name as loud as I can as my walls clamp down on him. I’m whining and whimpering underneath him as he works me out through my orgasm.

“Shit! Cassian! Ugh! I’m so…so close.” He grits out as I caress his cheek.

“I got you J.” I tell him as my hands cover his and I roll us over so I’m on top.

He lets out a deep growl as I sink down on him, his fingers reaching up to push my hair out of my face. I grab his hand and kiss his fingertips before rising up and slamming back down on him. His head falls back and into the pillow as my fingernails scrape against his hard chest and I begin to ride him. His hand makes it’s way to my center and his thumb presses against my clit, causing my head to tip back in pleasure as I ride him harder.

I fall over his chest as my hands claw at his chest and I pull my bottom lip through my teeth as pleasure surges through my body. God, he’s so good!

“That’s it Cassian. Ugh…yeah baby girl. Come for me again!” He grits out as I slam down on him.

His back arches off the bed as he comes deep inside me and my walls clamp down around him for the second time tonight. His name tears from my throat again as I rock against him through our orgasms before collapsing against his warm sweaty body. His arms wrap around my waist as I nuzzle his neck with my nose before resting my head in the crook of his neck. 

I’m holding onto Cassian as tight as I can as our breathing slows and we come down from our highs. I feel myself soften in her but she’s not moving off of me as we lay here. I’ve always wanted this with her and now that I have it I never want to let her go.

“Damn baby. Can we do that again soon?” Cassian asks me as she nibbles softly on my Adam’s apple and I let out a groan against her ear.

She giggles as I kiss the top of her head, “It’ll be real soon if you keep doing that,” I groan as I run my fingers through her soft hair.

“That can be arranged.” She whispers against my skin, giggling when I let out another growl, “I’m all yours now J.”

That’s right. She is mine. Now she’s Justin’s girl.

Hey, hey, you, you, I don’t like your girlfriend

No way, no way, I think you need a new one

Hey, hey, you, you, I could be your girlfriend

Hey, hey, you, you, I know that you like me

No way, no way, you know it’s not a secret

Hey, hey, you, you, I want to be your girlfriend