Chapter 1

             Awaking with a small murmur, I climbed out of bed, scratching my messy brown hair. It was a chilly January morning and I would have rather been in bed. Hell it was only 8 o’clock on Saturday morning.

              I would have been sleeping too if it wasn’t for my Uncle. I promised him I’d help him work in his Grocery Store, since his workers couldn’t come in that day. I really didn’t want to but I didn’t have any other choice. It was either that or I’d never hear the end of it from my very old fashioned Hispanic mother.

             I also was going to enjoy it because I knew my older brother, Andrew, was going to have to suffer as well. It was fun to watch him get pissed off at the stupid people who would come in and out of the store.

              I quickly brushed my teeth and washed my face in the bathroom and dressed myself in a French Connection baby tee that said ‘Fcuk Up’ in pink letters. I also put on a pink Guess velour sweat suit.  My long brown hair was parted to the side and pushed back in a ponytail.

             Makeup was a necessity but I decided not to over do it. I didn’t think I was going to see anyone but a couple of drunks anyway. I put on some smoky eye shadow that really made my blue-green eyes stand out. To top it off I added a little bit of clear gloss on my lips and headed down the stairs.

             My brother was sitting in the kitchen, gobbling down a bowl of cereal and milk. He smirked at me as I entered the kitchen.            

“Hey there, sis… Didn’t think you were gonna wake up.” He grinned at me with a mouth full of cereal. I cringed and threw the roll of paper towels at him. “HEY! MAMI!! NATALIA’S THROWING STUFF AT ME!!”  

            Yeah, my brother was supposed to be 22 but he acted like a fucking baby. I just rolled my eyes at him and grabbed the orange juice from the fridge and poured myself a glass.

             “NATALIA!!” My Mother yelled, in a heavy Spanish accent, from the next room. I rolled my eyes again. “LEAVE YOUR BROTHER ALONE!”  

            Andy just laughed at me as I threw my empty glass into the sink and leaned against the wall.

             “Are you ready to leave?”  

            “Yeah… chill out.” Andy got up and rinsed his dish out in the sink and walked to the front room in which I followed him.

              We put on our coats as our mother walked into the room, smiling.

             “Hace frio afuera mijitos! Dress warm! Y tengan cuidado.” That was just like my mother to warn us, but for some reason, the look on her face made me see that she was serious. I just nodded at her.

             “We will, Mami.” Andy leaned in and kissed our mothers cheek. I did the same and she smiled.

             “Bye Mami.”

              Andy and I walked out to his car and he drove to the store. On the way there he fiddled with his cds and I scolded him, not because he was doing anything wrong, but just because I liked to bother him. 

            “ANDY! Keep you’re eyes on the road… do you wanna get us killed or something?!”  

            “Fuck you, Nat.” He laughed and finally popped a cd into his cd player. “You’re gonna hear this song and get so upset.”

             “What song?” 

            “You’ll see…” 

            The music started and the car filed with a sound that reminded me of my childhood. It was “Hey Sandy” by Polaris, the theme song to Pete and Pete on Nickelodeon.

             I remember Andy and I used to watch that show when we were little. I even used to call him Pit Stain after one of the characters on the show to bother him. It was funny because we were even convinced that our mother had a metal plate in her head, just like the mom on the show.

             “Oh my God!” I lifted my hand to my mouth and began to giggle. “Andy you are insane.”  

            “Aww, Nat you know you miss those days. Sitting in front of the tv and chilling to Nickelodeon.”  

            “Of course I do. But only you would find that song.”

             When we arrived at the store, it looked pretty empty. I took the liberty to hang our jackets in the back while my Uncle raved on and on about how tired he was and how badly he wanted to retire. 

            I came back to the front and saw my brother had taken charge of the cash register. I pouted at him and then sighed, knowing I was stuck stocking all the shelves. I gave him the finger when my Uncle wasn’t looking and walked down to the basement to get a few cartons of Newport Lights.  

            I knew that was going to be what I was doing for the rest of the day. I was going to have to be walking up and down the stairs and probably be searching the dank basement. I cringed to myself and did what my uncle asked. There was nothing I could do about it anyway.

             Andy was the boy and the eldest so he always got what he wanted. He was the apple of the eye of every goddamn family member. He was the first grandson in the family and the smartest. He had actually just begun med school.

              Me on the other hand, I was just a 19 year old aspiring… nothing. I had no clue where I wanted to go in life. The family was always telling me to “get it together”, but I still had some time to decide what to do.

             Till I did decide, I was still going to be labeled as the fuck up of the family. I guess my shirt really did hold true to who I was.  

            After about the 6th time I ran up the stairs, I decided to take a break. There were no costumers anyway, and my Uncle didn’t seem to mind. I sat down on the counter and listened to my brother and Uncle talk away. 

            “And when are you going to find a nice girl to settle down with, Andrew?” My Uncle asked. Andy just shook his head and laughed. 

            “When I’m finished with school. What’s most important now is getting my M.D.” Andy smiled. “You know you’ll be happy when you have you’re favorite nephew as a doctor.”

             “Of course… but I don’t want you to forget about the other important things. Life isn’t all about work. You have to… como lo dices… you have to have fun.”

             “I know, Tio. I know.”

             “Y tu Natalia? Que tu quieres ser?”  

            Ugh. I knew he was going to ask me that. What do I want to be? I bit at the skin on my finger and shrugged.

             “I still don’t know, Tio.”

             “Aye mija.” He just shook his head and I rolled my eyes and hopped off the counter.   

           I didn’t want to sit around and hear how bad a person I was because I didn’t know what I wanted to do in life. Well, I shouldn’t exaggerate, they wouldn’t say I was a bad person, but they’d rush me to figure things out. But I didn’t know, maybe soon I would figure things out… but I still had 2 and a half years left of school.

             I headed down to the stock room and grabbed a box of coke cans. I heard some shouting going on upstairs and I was curious to what was happening. I walked back up the stairs and heard some unfamiliar voices talking. I placed the box down on the top of the stairs and walked back into the store. 

            My mouth dropped when I saw two men with hats on, dressed in all black and handkerchiefs that covered up to their eyes. What the fuck was this the Wild West?

             Confused, I looked at my brother and Uncle who both looked completely scared. Andy opened the cash register and mumbled to the guys. 

            “Please… take what you want… just don’t hurt us…”  

           “Just put all the fucking money in the bag!!!” One of the men screamed at my brother, holding the gun up higher and making it plain to my view.

             We were being robbed.

             My heart was pounding as I slowly walked backwards and grabbed my cell phone out of my pocket. I knew I had to call the police and save my family from these psychos. 

            I took another step backwards and the floor slipped from under my feet. I had tripped over the box of cokes and fell straight into the wall with a bang, while my cell phone slid to the other side of the room.

             I really was a moron. I mentally screamed at myself as the two men turned around a glared at me.

              “Well look what we have here.” One of the men said and advanced toward me. I scrambled to my feet, shaking with fear. “Look it’s a pretty girl… Probably a fucking virgin.” The man spat as his other friend collected all the money from my brother and then grabbed some food from the shelves. “Ya know what I do with virgins like you? I fuck them like crazy till they can’t scream anymore… I make them into my own personal whores.”

             I knew the tears were falling down my face. By this point, I didn’t care who saw that I was crying. I was ready to break down at that point. I wanted them to go away and just take what they wanted. I wanted my brother, Uncle and I to just all be okay… 

            The man ran his hand down my cheek and by instinct I moved my head away from him, and then with all the courage in my body, I spat in his face, and ran down the isle.  

            I heard my brother screaming at me and telling me to stop, but I didn’t listen and even now I regret not doing so. The other robber grabbed me and I closed my eyes in fear.

              “This is what you get, bitch!”

              Then I heard a gun shot go off and I heard something fall to the floor. My eyes fluttered open and I saw my brother, lying on the floor clutching his arm. Blood seeped out from his arm and I started to scream.

             “ANDY!!!”

              The man holding onto me looked at me, with his eyes full of compassion. I thought I was going to be sick. My brother was shot and dying on the floor because I had to try and be brave. I should have taken it. I shouldn’t have refused.  

            I thought I was going to fall to the floor, but the robber held onto me tightly. He was looking at me like he felt sorry and like he wanted to protect me… 

            Uh… maybe I was just hallucinating.  

            “COME ON MAN!! WE HAVE TO GET THE FUCK OUT OF HERE NOW!! DROP THE WHORE AND COME ON!” The other man held the gun in his hand; he didn’t know where to point it so he kept shifting the direction of it.

              After a few seconds the man just ran out of the store, while the compassionate one stared at me and then threw me over his shoulder.   

           “NO!!!! TIO!! ANDY!” I kicked my feet as the man ran out of the store and took me from my family. I saw my Uncle tending to my brother as I was taken out of the store. I hoped to God that my brother would be all right. 

            The man reached a black van and threw my in the back. There were no windows and a dark sheet covered the section between the front and the back. I was locked in, I was trapped.

             I started to cry harder now. I cried for my brother, and cried for the fate that I was going to meet. I was so frightened. I tried to open the door of the trunk but it was locked. I was stuck in that car. 

            I heard the men get into the front and speed away. They were all arguing. Thinking about it, I heard three voices. Two were yelling at the other for taking me. They told him to throw me out of the car somewhere.

             But when they heard the cop sirens, they knew it was too risky. I was stuck with these people.  I knew I was going to die for sure.

Chapter 2

 The car came to an abrupt stop, which knocked me out of my sleep. I was in the backseat for God knows how long. I knew the guys were talking, especially when they put the radio up really loud so I couldn’t hear what they were saying.

 I tried to calm myself and relax as “Faint” by Linkin Park filled the car. It was one of my favorite songs for sure, but it just wasn’t doing the trick. I was too scared. I didn’t even know how long I had been back there. The time had just seemed to go by so slowly. 5 minutes felt like an hour.

 The ignition was turned off and the doors of the car flew open. They were coming for me and the tears welled up in my eyes. I didn’t know what these men wanted from me. I didn’t have anything to give them.

 The back door of the van flew open and I squinted my eyes to adjust to the light. Wherever the hell we were, it was a lot warmer than I remembered and it was non-stop sunshine.

 “Get out.” A man with an Irish accent called to me. I could see him clutching something in his hand. It was a gun.

 I knew I couldn’t mess around; I slowly climbed out of the van, trying to hold back to tears that were ready to fall.

 “We’re gonna have some lunch…If you try any funny stuff don’t think any of us won’t kill you.” Another man said to me, I recognized his voice and froze. He was the one that spoke so horribly inside the store.

 I just nodded and headed into a small, run down diner with them. The very Southern waitress greeted us with a “Hey There Y’all!”

 Where the fuck was I?!

 We sat down in a booth and the three men all began talking. I just sat there and stared down at the placemat on the table. I was so afraid to even breathe. I knew these guys were serious, especially since one of them shot my brother.

 “Excuse me… I need to use the bathroom…”

 They HAD to let me go to the bathroom. They weren’t going to make me pee right there at the table right?

 “Fine. J, go with her and watch her.” The Irish man said to the curly headed man across from me.

The both of us got up and walked to the dirty bathroom. He even followed me in. I walked into the stall and shut the door lightly.

I gave myself a minute to regain composer on myself. This couldn’t be happening to me. This just seemed like something that happens in a Lifetime movie, not in real life and definitely not to me.

I went about my business and came out of the bathroom and washed my hands. The J guy was staring at me as I washed my hands and dried them off. I couldn’t help but feel awkward in front of this man. He looked like he wanted to say something to me.

I turned away from him and threw the paper towel into the wastebasket. Still I felt his eyes on me. So I turned around and glared at him.

“Listen, J.” I said sarcastically, mocking his name. “You must be having so much fun kidnapping me and staring at me like I’m a fucking piece of meat. But I’d appreciate it if you stopped and possibly let me go the fuck home.” I tried to walk past him but he grabbed me and looked straight into my eyes. I turned my head away from him quickly as his soft soothing voice filled my ears.

“Please… Don’t act like that in front of the other guys. I won’t hurt you, but they will…”

“And why won’t you hurt me?” I shot back at him, my head turning to look him in the face.

I didn’t notice it before, but he was gorgeous. Definitely the best-looking man I’d ever laid eyes on. He had these beautiful crystal blue eyes that someone could get lost in.

My heart rate increased as he held onto my arm and licked his bottom lip. God he was so sexy…

“I don’t know… I just won’t hurt you…I can promise you that. And my name is Justin…”

“I’m Natalia.” I replied to him, not able to take my eyes off him.

What the fuck was I doing? I was lusting for one of my fucking kidnappers. That was crazy. I couldn’t believe how stupid I was acting, and it didn’t matter that he was being really nice to me, he helped kidnap me, and that’s just not okay.

I finally pushed away from his embrace and walked back to the table where the rest of the kidnappers were sitting. I would eventually come to know that they were Tommy and JC. The Irish man was Tommy and JC was the dark haired psycho. I was so afraid of that guy. Especially since I pieced together that he was the one who spoke so roughly to me during the robbery and most likely shot my brother.

“Took ya long enough…” Tommy growled as I resumed my seat and my staring position at the placemat. “So what will you be eating, little lady?”

“I’m not hungry.” I replied to him and turned my head to stare out the window.

“Listen, we’re not stopping again for a long time, so I think it’s best if you eat something.”

 “I’ll eat when I go home.” I crossed my arms and pouted slightly.

 “If you think you’re upsetting us by starving yourself you’re wrong. We don’t really give a fuck if you eat or not, hell it’d be a lot cheaper.” JC hissed and I just sighed.

 “Just have them wrap up something. She’ll be hungry later.” Justin said as he sat back down at the table. I rolled my eyes at his assumption. Yeah, he spoke like he knew me so well. He knew shit about me and it made my blood boil.

 How could I go from hating him, to liking him, to hating him again?

 I definitely needed to find a way home. 
 

**

 I watched the guys eat and then they switched to a new car, a black Hummer.

 But I was starting to get confused. These guys didn’t seem really poor, they had nice cars, nice clothes… But why did they hold up my Uncles store? They couldn’t have gotten much from a measly little Grocery Store. The most they could have gotten was a few hundreds. Why rob him?

 They sat me in the back next to Justin. I spent most of the ride staring out the window. The guys refused to talk much around me, so I figured the only way to get the dirt out of them was the play that I was asleep.

 It was easy enough; I closed my eyes but stayed attentive to the sounds.

 “Boss, what are we going to do with the broad?” JC’s voice was the first I heard that mentioned business. Great. Keep going boys, keep it coming.

 “Well she just came into our laps by mistake and we didn’t get all the money from Eduardo, so this little bitch is gonna be our pawn. Until Eduardo pays back the money he owes, his niece is gonna be staying with us.” Tommy responded, he was obviously the leader of something really big. This wasn’t just some little robbery; this had to be like drug dealers or assassins of something.  I tried not to let the shocked emotion show on my face.

 This was because Eduardo was into some bad stuff. That didn’t seem like my Uncle. He was a family man and provided well for my Aunt Ramona and my three cousins. This just didn’t seem right.

 “Just don’t hurt the girl…” Justin said and I heard JC chuckle.

 “I can promise you that I won’t kill her, but if the bitch decides to try and cause trouble, she will be punished severely.” Tommy replied to Justin. I nervously sat there, knowing now that Justin was really only trying to protect me when he told me to be careful.

 I kept my eyes closed and really did drift off to sleep this time. I knew that as soon as we reached our destination, I was in for hell.

**

 “Wake up.” Justin shook me lightly and I opened my eyes.

We were parked in front of a beautiful mansion with a stunning flower garden surrounding it. This place was almost surreal. My mouth was dropped as I looked around, spotting a far away tennis court.

I turned and looked at Justin who was smiling at me. I smiled back at him and pulled my brown hair out of the ponytail.

“Where are we?”

“Tommy’s Place… Nice right?”

“Better than nice…” I replied and stepped out of the car.  I almost got dizzy at how beautiful the whole vicinity was. There was just so much to see and I couldn’t make myself look away.

“Come on, you’ll have plenty of time to look around… let me show you where you’re going to be staying.” Justin said and I just nodded.

The weather was warm out; there was even a slight breeze. I then realized it was January. I didn’t understand, where the hell were we?! Mexico maybe? But how the hell were we there in such a short period of time? There were so many questions that I needed and wanted to know, but no one wanted to tell me a thing.

I bit at my now chapped lip and followed him inside the “Palace”. What I didn’t understand was why they were keeping me in such a nice place, and not having me somewhere… well more like a prison.

I mean I was their prisoner, why weren’t they treating me that way?

I headed up a beautiful spiral staircase with Justin. The house was luxurious and beautifully decorated. These guys were definitely rich. Maybe they were Mafia?

Justin pushed open the doors that beheld the room I was going to be staying in. There was a King-Sized canopy bed with Cherry-Oak furniture filling the room.

There was a vanity too! I always wanted a vanity… but just not in these conditions. I stopped myself from getting too excited and turned and saw a balcony. It was huge, almost the size of my room at home.

“Oh my…”

“I’m guessing that means you like it?” Justin grinned at me. I rolled my eyes.

“It’s fine, it would be a lot nicer if I wasn’t kidnapped and being held against my wishes.” I retorted and walked to the marble fireplace.

What the hell did they need a fireplace for in heat like this?

“Where are we?” I finally turned around and stared Justin right in the face. He looked away from me and sighed.

“Florida… that’s all I can say.”

“Oh God…” I gnawed at my nail, knowing there was no way at all for me to get home. I had no money, no phone… nothing. I was trapped until my Uncle Eduardo decided to repay these men. “Fine then, if you’re done talking to me… Get out. I want to be alone.”

He sighed for a moment and then looked at me for a moment, his eyes taking in all of me.

“Fine, but remember what I said… Do everything they ask you, Natalia. Please…”

“I still don’t understand why you care so much.” I put my hands on my hips and stared at him.

“I don’t know even know why…” He turned and smiled a little. “See you later…”

Then he left and I was a lone. I tried to unlock the door and get out, but I couldn’t get out. I threw my pillow across the room and finally started to break down and cry on the bed.

Chapter 3

“I don’t care what any of you say!” I heard a woman’s voice from outside of my door and I perked up from reading a magazine that Justin had brought for me.

I was beyond bored, locked up in this room. I felt like the walls were closing in on me. Going out on the balcony barely helped, but it was the best I could do to save my sanity.

“I’m going to see her, now step the hell out of my way!”

A petite brunette walked into the room and shut the door behind her. She stood for a moment and stared at me and then smiled warmly.

She was really stunning, wearing a pair of black pants with a ribbon and chain belt. Her shoes were a pair of slip on pumps and her shirt was a laced camisole with a black suede jacket over it.

“Hi.” She said with a smile and sat on the side of my bed.

“…Hi…” I replied and just looked at her, unsure if she was going to hurt me. She didn’t seem like she was, but the way she studied me made me nervous.

“I’m sorry about everything, Natalia.” She was quick to apologize and I just stared at her.

“How the hell did you know my name?” I furrowed my eyes at her and she just laughed.

“I’m Esperanza… but call me Hope, most people do anyway. I’m Tommy’s fiancée.” 

“You’re Hispanic?” I questioned and she nodded.

“Yep, I’m Columbian and Ecuadorian. You’re Hispanic too right?”

“Mmhmm. I’m Cuban and from Spain.” I bit at the inside of my cheek and looked at Hope. “When am I gonna go home?”

“I don’t know…” She sighed and I could tell she truly did feel sorry for me. “I wish I could get Tommy to let you go now, but he wouldn’t listen to me anyway. All I know is that until you’re Uncle pays the money that he owes them, you’re stuck here.”

“Oh God.” I buried my face in my hands for a second and then finally looked up at her again. “How much does he owe them?” Hope just shrugged.

“All I know is that it’s a lot.”

“If I could beat my Uncle right now I would. I mean I can deal with all of this, but one of them shot my brother.”

She didn’t know what to say but I knew she felt sorry for me. She put her hand on my shoulder and sighed.

“If you wanna go shower or something, there are clothes all in the cabinets and the shower is right there…” She pointed to a connecting room that I had already been in numerous times. 

“Thanks… I think I might…” I put my hand on my head and sighed. “What’s today? Because I lost track of the time…”

“It’s the 12th…” she told me and I rubbed my head.

“You know, today I should have been starting my 2nd semester in college.” I wiped a stray tear before it fell from my eyes and got off my bed. “But anyway, I’m gonna go take that shower, it was nice meeting you Hope.”

I walked into the bathroom and shut the door behind me and turned on the water. I decided to take a relaxing bath instead. Maybe it would calm me and I could think of a way out of this hell.

I added some bubble bath into the huge tub. I think it could have fit about 20 people. I lit a couple of candles and placed them around the tub. I stripped out of my clothes and hopped into the tub.

I relaxed a little bit and thought about my family. I wonder if they missed me or had clue where I was. Maybe they were on their way to rescue me…

Haha… right. I highly doubted that but a girl could dream though, right?

I washed my hair and finished my bath. I drained and rinsed out the enormous bathtub and then dried myself off with a towel.

The towels were so fluffy and it kind of annoyed me. This bastard had so much money, what was the little bit that my Uncle owed him gonna do. He still had his millions or billions.

I tied the towel tightly around my body and stormed out of the bathroom. I was just so goddamn angry. I needed to get out of this hellhole.

I flung the doors open to the huge armoire and searched through the expensive clothes. Again, my blood began to boil. With all the money that bastard Tommy spent on these clothes he could have probably paid back all the money my Uncle Eduardo owed him.

I pulled a pair of Seven jeans out of the closet and my mouth dropped. I had been dying for a pair of these but I just couldn’t afford them.

Well that was fucking great. I got them now that I was fucking kidnapped and locked in a room. I pulled on my panties and bra and then the jeans and admired them in the full-length mirror.

Damn. I looked good in them. Too bad no one else would be able to see me in them.

I scrunched my already natural wavy hair and put on this black off the shoulder shirt. It was really clingy, but with the jeans it looked really hot.

Usually I’m really self-conscious about my body but what the hell. I was going to have to get used to only seeing myself in the mirror for a really long ass time.

I sat back down on my bed and got back to reading Cosmo. Man, I was bored again. What I wouldn’t of given to get the fuck out of that place.

“Hey…”

I looked up and saw that Justin had entered my room. I faked a smile and looked up at him.

“Oh. Hi.” I went back to looking at the magazine as he sat down on the edge of the bed.

You know when you can feel someone watching you? Yep, I was getting that. So I looked up at him, and I knew I had to be a bitch.

“Can I help you?”

“Na. Whatcha doin?” He asked, acting almost like a little kid. I rolled my eyes.

“Articles on how to make you’re man cum like never before.” I looked up at him and smiled seductively. He smirked back at me; I could tell I was really turning him on. “Too bad there are no men around here.” I threw the magazine back onto the nightstand and jumped off the bed. I walked outside to the balcony and sighed.

“You know this can be a lot easier on you…” He was standing right behind me, I could feel his hot breath on the back of my neck and it sent tingles down my spine.

“And how’s that?” I turned around and glared at him. “Explain to me how being abducted can be easy.”

“I didn’t mean it like that I-“

“No. You are just some horny little bastard that thinks he can get into my pants just cause I’m upset. You know what fuck you. I’m not like other girls. I’m not you’re typical damsel in distress. I won’t put out.”

“You know through that rant you only got one thing right. You are different from other girls but that doesn’t mean I’m gonna fuck you. You intrigue me, so I’m being nice to you.”

“Kidnapping someone is real nice.” I replied sharply and crossed my arms over my chest.

“You know, taking a look at you, you seem like this innocent good girl…but you’re just a major bitch.”

“I’m both. I’m a good girl but I can be a bitch when low lives like you harm me, I fight back.”

Justin just shook his head and laughed. I glowered at him.

“So now what I say is funny?”

“No, you’re just really cute when you’re trying to be tough.” Justin was grinning at me, until I finally turned around and stared back outside.

“Whatever. Are you leaving?”

“Well if you want me to but I was thinking about taking you out…”

Out. That was the key word. I spun around and stared at him in shock.

“Oh my God. Are you serious?!” I was beyond eager to get out of the room. Sure, I’d only been there for a day but it felt like so much longer.

Maybe this would even be my key to getting out of this place.

“Yeah. I’ll take you on the tour of this place.”

Oh man, I was so excited that without thinking I flung myself straight into his arms. I didn’t care how much I hated the man for helping to kidnap me but he was taking me out somewhere and I couldn’t be more ecstatic for that.

I needed to be out of this goddamn room. Maybe being nice to Justin would pay off.

Chapter 4

Damn. This place was even more breath taking then I first realized. Justin and I were seated on a loveseat swing set in the middle of the beautiful garden. The sun was just setting and I could see it perfectly. It was so beautiful to watch, but I knew I’d rather be home, no matter how captivatingly beautiful everything was.

I had also come to the conclusion that A, Justin was really insane to think I’d fall for his stupid act. I knew it was bullshit that he wanted to try and be my friend. I saw the way he looked at me. I knew the bastard wanted me and hey I’d be lying if I said if under different circumstances I wouldn’t like him.

But he’s crazy. Very hot, but also very crazy.

And B, Justin could just be messing with my head. I’ve seen plenty of episodes of Unsolved Mysteries to know how this story goes. He’ll befriend me and get me to trust him and then when the time is right, BAM! He’ll rape and/or kill me. Then again I could just be paranoid.

I turned and looked at the so-called “twisted killer” sitting next to me. He looked like a little kid, just staring up at the sky. He had this look on his face and this twinkle in his eye that made me want to just giggle and pinch his cheeks.

I studied his features, taking in the perfect structure of his cheekbones, to the shape of his sexy lips.

Why did he have to be so fucking sexy? Why did it tear me up inside that a part of me just wanted to kiss him? I just wanted a little kiss and that would satisfy me.

God I needed help. This guy was my dream and my nightmare.

“You okay?” I snapped out of my thoughts and noticed that Justin and I were looking right at each other.

But I quickly looked away from him.

“Yeah… I’m sorry. Everything is just so overwhelming.” I was being honest about that. Life was just completely crazy. I mean a few days ago I was in NY and all I had to worry about was school and going out with my friends. Now I had to think about my brother dying and never getting out of here.

“I know. I wish I could do something…”

My head snapped up and I stared at him. “Help me get out.”

He closed his eyes for a moment and then sighed. “I’m sorry I can’t do that.” Justin got up from his seat next to me and then stood before me. “I heard that you’re brother is okay.”

“Oh my God! Really?!” I was gushing at this point and I was ready to cry from happiness. He was okay. Andy was really okay.

“Yeah.” Justin grinned at me. “The bullet hit him in his upper arm and although he lost a lot of blood, he’s doing fine now. They’re actually gonna release him from the hospital in a few days.”

I jumped up from my seat and through my arms around Justin and hugged him tightly. I was so fucking happy that I didn’t care about anything else. Andy was okay and that was all that mattered.

“Thank you so much for telling me Justin! Oh my God!” Okay… so maybe I was beyond happy and maybe I just enjoyed hugging him. It was okay.

Justin had definitely proved that he was loyal to me. I mean he didn’t have to tell me shit about my brother, but the fact that he did made me see that maybe he was a nice guy who was mixed up in the wrong crowd.

“Don’t worry about it. I just thought you deserved to know.” He stated with a smile. “I know if I were in you’re shoes I’d be freaked out.”

“I was beyond freaked out. I love my brother so much. He can be an ass sometimes but he’s a great guy and he’s always protecting me. I just wish I could have protected him. It was my fault.”

Justin bit his lip and sighed. “No it wasn’t you’re fault…”

“I wish I could believe that.” My voice was hoarse from holding the tears back. I wished now more than ever that I could go home to my family. I knew they really needed me as much as I needed them.

Justin embraced me again and ran his fingertips through my hair as I lightly sniffled. I was crying now; I couldn’t hold back my bitter tears that fell down my face.

I buried my face in his shoulder and wrapped my arms around him tightly. He leaned down to my ear and started to sing one of my all time favorite songs, “Today” by The Smashing Pumpkins.

“Today is the greatest day I've never known, can't live for tomorrow, tomorrow's much too long. I'll burn my eyes out, before I get out. I wanted more
than life could ever grant me, bored by the chore, of saving face.” His angelical voice whispered into my ear. I was melting right there and then. Besides the fact that he was singing that awesome song, his voice was great. He could have probably been a professional singer if he wanted.

I looked up at him with tears in my eyes and smiled. “Today is the greatest day I've ever known. Can't wait for tomorrow, I might not have that long. I’ll tear my heart out before I get out.”

Justin stopped for a moment and just grinned at me and ran his hand down my cheek. Oh God why did he have to be so perfect. Why did he have to know exactly the right thing to say? Why did he have to sing that song?

I knew that I was betraying everyone in my family by doing what I was about to do but I couldn’t stop myself. To tell you the truth I really didn’t want to stop either way.

I leaned in and kissed him softly on the lips. He willingly kissed me back and pressed his hand against the back of my head and pushed us closer together. It was just like I couldn’t get enough of him. I could hear the rest of the song playing in my head.

Pink ribbon scars
That never forget
I tried so hard
To cleanse these regrets
My angel wings
Were bruised and restrained
My belly stings

Today is
Today is
Today is
The greatest day

I want to turn you on
I want to turn you on
I want to turn you on
I want to turn you

 We pulled away from the explosive kiss and just stared at each other. We had so much built up tension for each other and I guess it had all just came out. Maybe it was also that I was so lonely and he was the only one there. Maybe we were both taking advantage of each other.

 One thing was for sure; I would not take back that kiss for anything. On my top 10 romantic kiss list, that kiss is 1 through 10. Well maybe it wasn’t that amazing to anyone else. But to me, God, it felt like heaven, or just something so un-forbidden.

 Yeah, I was one of those good girls that did everything they were told. But sometimes, doing something like this made me feel wild. Yeah, I made out with my kidnapper. If that’s not a crazy thing to do then I don’t know what is.

 “Today is the greatest, today is the greatest day, today is the greatest day, that I have ever really known.” He sang the end of the song to me and pressed his forehead against mine.

 Damn.

**

 After a little while, Justin and I walked back into the house to this big dining room. He informed me that Tommy, his fiancé Hope, JC and us were going to have dinner together.

 I couldn’t help but cringe when he told me that. I didn’t want to see any of them with the exception of Hope and Justin. They weren’t really that bad.

 Hope didn’t seem like them at all. I mean she probably just really cared about Tommy and was willing to put up with his career choice. I guess love is like that sometimes. It blinds a person so all they can see is good in their partner.

 Wow, they should really call me Dr. Ruth or something.

 Justin and I sat down at the table with them while “One Last Cry” by Brian McKnight in the background. I could tell that Hope had probably picked out the music because damn, I just can’t see a big tough mobster like Tommy listening to something like that.

 “Nice of you to finally join us.” Tommy said, irritated. Hope turned and shot him a look to shut up and he just sighed.

 “You’ll have to excuse Tommy. When he’s hungry he gets grouchy.” Esperanza explained to me and I just forced a smile. “Did you enjoy the gardens?”

 I turned and looked at Justin and smiled and then turned back to Hope. “Yeah, you could say that.” She just raised an eyebrow and looked back and forth at the both of us. It was like she knew.

 “Well that’s great.” Tommy said as a dozen butlers came and served the food to the table.

 I tried not to look shocked when I saw all the food they were laying out. All of it could probably feed a small country for months.

 The table was filled with filet minion, caviar, and a bunch of seafood. I guess Hope must have had an influence on him because there was Paella and pernil at the table. I smirked and served myself some of the rice and seafood while one of the waiters poured some red wine into my glass.

 What the fuck?! I thought I was captured, not out to eat a fancy restaurant.

 Everyone was eating and not really saying anything at first. I felt a little awkward to tell you the truth. I really felt like everyone was just staring at me. Especially JC. The man was completely silent but stared at me the whole time. Either he really hated me or I had something on my face.

 But damn that’s so fucking rude when someone stares like that. So I made sure to do the same thing. I just stopped and stared right at him till he finally excused himself and left.

 Bastard. I was relieved when he left.

 “So… Natalia, What school do you go to??” Hope asked me. I didn’t want to be mean to her because she really did seem nice. I know she was trying to make things the best for me but I wanted out of this place.

 “I went to Pace in Manhattan.”

 “Don’t worry. You’ll go back soon enough.” Hope turned and gave Tommy a look. I could tell she wanted him to let me go but he just ignored her.

 I didn’t understand how such a nice girl like Hope could be with such an asshole like Tommy. He obviously didn’t appreciate her and she seemed like she loved him so much.  It was just the way she looked at him that made me see that this girl was crazy for him.

 Well she’d have to be a little crazy to put up with this life style… right? I mean the guy was a fucking Mafia King.

 “I was thinking maybe we could go and have a girly day tomorrow. I know you’re probably stressed…” Hope suggested and I just smiled.

 “That sounds great… would we be leaving this place?”

 “No.” Tommy answered for her and set his fork down on the table. “We have everything here and I will not have you leave unless it is with me, Justin or JC.”

 I bit my tongue to stop myself for cursing this bastard out. Why did he have to be such a prick?

 Justin just smiled a little at me and squeezed my hand under the table.

 “Yeah… I’m gonna go rest now. Thank you for dinner.” I stood up as did Justin and he walked me back to my room. I sighed as we walked back into the prison.

 “Do you want me to go?” He asked and I just looked at him for a moment.

 “No, just stay with me till I fall asleep.” I stated, kinda almost commanding him. He nodded and I grabbed a pair of pjs out of my dresser and walked to the bathroom and put them on and just climbed into bed.

 I rested my head on his shoulder and sighed. I knew I should have tried to make the best of this like he said but I couldn’t. I just knew that there was more to this whole situation then I realized.

 I traced lines up and down his chest with my fingertips. I felt so safe in this man’s arms. This man I didn’t even know. This man that maybe I would never fully know.

Chapter 5

 When I awoke the next morning, he was already gone. I really wanted to thank him for being there for me. Knowing that he was there made me feel safe. As crazy as that sounds, Justin was the only person that had ever made me feel safe.

 How crazy is that? Feeling safe with my kidnapper. Yep, I really am crazy.

 I climbed out of the giant bed and dressed in a jean skirt and a wrap around black shirt. I was hoping that Esperanza would come early so I could hurry out of this room.

 I looked in the mirror and pulled my hair up into a messy ponytail and slipped a comfortable pair of black flip-flops on my feet.

 Just as I finished getting ready, Hope walked into the room with a smile on her face. She wore a white tank that said ‘Fcuk Like a Bunny’ and a pair of baggy black cargo pants.

 “Hey there.” She smiled at me; her chandelier earrings were shimmering in the light of the room.

 “Hey. Thank God you’re here. I so do not wanna be in this room anymore.”

 “I don’t blame ya girl.” She laughed slightly and leaned against the door. “Just grab a bathing suit. We can relax by the pool later.”

 “Alrightie.” I said and walked to the dresser and grabbed a gold and black halter bikini from it. I turned and smiled at her and then we headed out the door.

 I followed her into a glass elevator. Damn! It was huge. I looked around, getting a perfect view of the pool outside. There was a waterfall that dropped into the huge pool. It looked like there was a small island right in their yard.

 I always dreamed about having a house like this when I was younger. But then reality hits you and you realize your not going to get it unless you become a doctor… or marry one. ^_^

 Hope clicked the button for what I assumed to be the first floor.

I bit my lip and tried to ignore the man standing in the corner with the large gun in his hand. He never really looked at me, he just seemed to stare off at some fixated point. I raised an eyebrow and smirked, he was like one of those British guards with the big hats.

I was tempted to bother him, but I wasn’t going to fuck with a man with a gun that big… and wow that did not sound right.

We entered this huge room, and sat in these huge plush chairs. Hope was making small talk with me. I stayed interested, hoping that maybe I could get the real dirt out.

I wanted to know more about Tommy Ryan, Justin and JC. So far the most we were talking about was music. She had a love for Lifehouse.

“Oh my God… You don’t understand how much I love Lifehouse. Jason Wade is my savior. Did I mention he’s really sexy too?” She laughed as her manicurist filed her nails. “Too bad he’s married!”

“And too bad you’re engaged to Tommy!” I replied and laughed. The woman doing my nails was carefully filling in my acrylic tips. She barely looked and me and didn’t say anything. She actually seemed really frightened, but I decided not to do anything.

“I love Tommy.” She smiled at me. “But it’s okay that I love Jason too.” I couldn’t help but laugh.

“Sure it is. I love David Boreanaz, when I was younger I used to tell myself that I was going to marry him. I even said that he was married just because he was waiting for me to get older.”

Hope burst out into hysterics due to my teenybopper dreams. I set my head down on my arm and couldn’t help but to giggle with her.

“That’s adorable. I used to make out with my Leonardo DiCaprio pictures every night.”

“Oh my God. I used to love Leo!!” I said with a giggle. “I used to watch Titanic and Romeo and Juliet like everyday!”

“OH MY GOD!! I loved Romeo and Juliet. I used to watch it and sit with a box of tissues and cry. During Titanic I’d scream that Rose was a whore and should of let him live.”

“Haha. When Jack died in the movie I cried so hard. I had some old people laughing at me in the movie theater.” I confessed, Hope began to laugh harder until she snorted. This caused me to burst out laughing. It was like a chain effect.

Talking to Hope was like talking to an old friend I’ve known forever. It was awesome because for a split second I didn’t feel like a prisoner.

After we finished with our nails, we changed into our bathing suits and headed to the pool. I lathered myself up with tanning oil before we went.

The way I saw it was that, hey, if I was in Florida, I was going to take advantage and tan my white self. I guess something good could come out of this.

I wore my bikini while Hope put on a black and white bikini that connected the two pieces in the front and the back.

We laid by the pool for a while, just talking about some stupid crap, until Justin and Tommy came down.

Justin was wearing a pair of black shorts and that was it. I couldn’t help but stare at him. Damn, he was built. He was like an Adonis.

Tommy was looking sexy himself in a pair of white trunks that said, “Hope” on them. I almost awed at that really loud.

I could see how much they loved each other in the way that they looked at each other and by the way that they touched each other. Hope’s eyes just seemed to light up when he entered the room.

But then again I noticed that she would space off a little. Especially when his phone rang or he had something mentioned about his business. I didn’t understand it at first, and I shrugged it off but there was something going on that she wasn’t saying.

Justin knocked me out of my thoughts when he picked me up and threw me into the pool. I screamed and when I surfaced I glared at him.

“That was SO uncalled for!”

“Eh, what can I say, you were there and it was an open target.” He smirked at me. I held up my middle finger and then splashed him.

“HEY!” Justin held up his hands as I splashed him and laughed. “I can’t let you get away with that!” He jumped into the pool and soaked me with water.

“YOU ASS!” I laughed and splashed him again. He grabbed me by the waist and grinned.

“That is SO not cool, Natalia!”

“Yes it was!” I said in a singsong tone.

“Psh! Yeah okay. You need to be punished.”  Justin dunked me underwater and I screamed again.

Tommy and Hope were busy making out to notice anything that was going on. Justin let me up from underwater and I hit his arm.

“OW!”

“Aww come on, I didn’t hit you that hard!”

“Yes you did!” He gave me a puppy dogface and I giggled.

“You’re a big strong mobster, I think you can take it.”

He looked a little shocked that I said that at first and then laughed. “You should kiss it and make it better.”

“Nope! You splashed me! I don’t have to. I think we’re even.”

 “How bout a kiss here.” He pointed to his lips. Despite how corny that was, I thought it was adorable.

 “Eh… I guess.”

 I leaned in and gave him a soft kiss on the lips. Just as the kiss started to heat up, I swam away from him.

 Now the pool was huge, so I headed to the other side of it and under the waterfall. Yep, that bastard Tommy had a waterfall in his pool. If only everyone was as fucking rich as Tommy.

 I sat on a rock behind the waterfall and smirked a little. I was teasing poor Justin so much, but it was so much fun.

 Wait, what was I doing?! I was having fun with my kidnapper? I shook my head for a moment and fake smiled when Justin came up from the water.

 God I was so confused. I was going from one extreme to the other. What was wrong with me? Why couldn’t I just be normal?

 Oh wait, I remember why I can’t be normal… it’s because I’ve been fucking kidnapped!!!!!!

 I took in a deep breath and looked at Justin.

 ‘I’m gonna go rest in my room, I don’t feel well.”

 I hopped off the rock and headed out of the pool. Justin followed me and looked really confused. I guess he must of thought he was going to get some or something.

 I excused myself from Hope and headed up to my “prison cell” once again. This wasn’t going to be the last I heard from them today.

 In fact a hell of a lot more was to come.

Chapter 6

 I was staring out the window when Tommy stormed into my room. He practically slammed the door open and I thought it was going to break off the hinges.

 I watched him startled and finally regained my composer.

 “Can I help you, oh great Mafia Lord?”

 “Watch your mouth, little girl. I’m not Justin; you don’t have me wrapped around your little finger. I’ll fucking kill you if I want to so show some goddamn respect.”

 Wow. That drew me back and scared the shit out of me. I just looked at him and nodded. Eep, how the mighty me had fallen.

 “Anyway. You need to come downstairs because we are about to call you’re Uncle Eduardo and you need to be present to tell him you’re okay.” Tommy stated to me.

 “Fine.”

 We walked to his huge office. It looked like Tony Montana’s Office from Scarface. It had the black marble on the walls and the gold trim to everything.

 Tommy ordered me to sit on a black leather chair as he sat down at his desk.  Justin and JC were standing in the back of the room with huge guns in their hands.  I especially didn’t want to fuck with JC because I knew given the chance he would probably blow my brains out.

 Tommy dialed a number on speakerphone and when I heard my Uncle’s voice, I perked up and listened.

 “Hello Eduardo.” Tommy said coldly.

 “Thomas… please… I’m trying to get the money as fast as I can.” Eduardo said through the speaker.

 “That’s not fast enough Eduardo. You have two fucking weeks. You hear me? Two fucking weeks to get the money or I’ll kill the little bitch.” Tommy hissed and I bit my lip nervously.

 “Tommy, please, can’t I pay you in payments… it’s a lot of money…” My Uncle was begging him.

 “I don’t fucking care. You should have thought about that when you tried to slip out of paying me you fuck. NO ONE FUCKS OVER TOMMY RYAN! NO ONE!” Tommy screamed, he was staring at the phone almost like he was staring at my Uncle.

 “Alright Tommy… I’ll get you the money… But don’t hurt Natalia, please.”

 My hands started to shake a little as I heard all of this occur. Tommy would definitely kill me. I wouldn’t put it past him not to.

 I shivered a little, and tried to keep myself from crying.

 “I won’t… here she is now…” Tommy looked at me and I stayed quiet. “Go the fuck ahead and talk.”

 “Tio Eduardo?” I said, my voice was quivering with fear and sadness.

 “Aye Natalia… Mija I’m sorry… I didn’t want to get you or tu hermano involved in this.”

 “I know… but just save me Tio. I’m in Florida in a really big house!! Tio please!! Tio I want to go home! GET THE COPS TO HELP ME TIO!” I was almost screaming now. JC came up behind me and put his hand over my mouth and a gun to my head.

 “Shut the fuck up.” JC stated. I just swallowed deeply and nodded. The salty warm tears were falling from my eyes and were showing no signs of stopping.

 “You call the cops, Eduardo, and I will kill her. I’ll send her body back to so decapitated that you won’t even be able to identify it.” Tommy sneered; he took a sip from his glass of courvoisier and set it back down on the desk. “But if you get the money I will send her back. You have two weeks, you son of a bitch. Two fucking weeks.”

 Tommy hung up the phone and stared at me menacingly. JC let go of me and I just looked at him.

 “What the fuck do you think you’re doing, huh? You want me to have to kill you?”

 “No… I’m sorry…”

 “Yeah, don’t try something like that again. Your stay here can be pleasant or it can be hell. You make the choice.”  Tommy stated and I just nodded.

 I was too scared to give a smart-ass remark or even look at him now. I stared at the floor until Tommy finally dismissed me.

 Justin took me out into the garden to calm me down. I was barely able to keep myself together.

 He tried to talk to me and calm me down but I was barely able to look at him, let alone talk. Tommy had really shaken me up. I wanted my Uncle to get me out of here. I didn’t want to be nice to anyone; I didn’t want to play nice anymore. I just wanted to go home.

 I don’t think I would have even minded the cold either. I hate winter but I would rather be in freezing cold NYC than any place else.

 “Natalia? Are you alright?”

 “Do I look like I’m alright?” I snapped at him. He didn’t answer me so I continued. “I was just threatened numerous times that I was going to be killed. I JUST WANT TO BE IN MY FUCKING HOUSE! I DON’T WANT TO BE HERE!!!!” I screamed at the top of my lungs and fell to my feet onto the ground.

 I hit the ground with my fist and looked down at the concrete. My hand was throbbing but I didn’t even care. Nothing mattered other than getting the fuck out of here.

 Justin knelt down next to me and ran his hands through my hair. I hiccupped from crying so hard and finally calmed myself down.

 “I just want to go home…” I whispered.

 “I know… and you will. You just have to be strong for a little while.”

 “I don’t want to be strong. I want to be home.”

 “I’m sorry, Natalia.” He leaned over and hugged me tightly. “Do you want me to take you somewhere? We can go eat something and you can calm down a little…”

 “Somewhere as in out of this Fort?” I asked and Justin laughed.

 “Yeah, not too far but there’s a diner close by that Tommy owns.”

 “Anything is better than being here.” I forced a smile and Justin grabbed my hand and pulled me back inside. I wanted to hide behind him as we came back into contact with Tommy, but at the same time I wanted to show that I wasn’t scared, even though that was a lie.

 “Tommy is it okay if I take her to Angels Diner?”

 Tommy looked at the both of us for a second and smirked. He was holding Hope so I figured he wouldn’t be a dick in front of her.

 “Alright… but take JC with you.” Tommy said and walked over to us. He left Hope staring at us with a smile. “And if you try anything… like escaping… don’t think there won’t be repercussions.” He whispered to me and I just defiantly stared back at him.

 I knew that since JC was going to be there, there was going to be no way of me getting away. I would just have to suffer with the both of them.

 This was going to be the longest two weeks of my life.

**

 We hopped into JC’s red Mercedes convertible. I of course, sat in the back while Justin and JC rode in the front. JC turned on “My Plague” by Slipknot. I loved that song so I just smiled to myself.

 Even though he was a complete psycho, he had good taste in music.

 We drove down this little dirt road with the top down. I wanted to get up and scream along with the lyrics. I KNOW WHY YOU BLAME ME!! I KNOW WHY YOU PLAGUE ME!!!!

 I was taking the blame for my Uncles mistakes. He got involved with the Mafia; he wasn’t able to pay back the money he owed. This was his problem. But I was paying for it.

 Though I couldn’t say I had been treated badly. In fact I felt like a princess, living in a huge house, and being pampered beyond belief. But I wanted to go home to. I wanted to feel that safety of my home.

 But no, I was in hell with the devil himself aka Tommy Ryan and his loyal minions.

 JC drove the car to this cute little diner. He parked the car in the parking lot and literally jumped out of the car. Justin got out as well and then he helped me out.

 “Tommy probably told you this already… but no funny stuff. I’m serious.” JC said to me. I just nodded and followed him and Justin into the diner.

 We sat towards the back in this small booth. Almost instantaneously, I started looking through the jukebox. I smirked to myself at the cheesy but great music. I loved how it was filled with music from the 80’s and early 90’s. The best music ever was made in those time periods.

 I grabbed 50 cents from Justin and turned on “I Love You Always Forever” by Donna Lewis. I love that song so much, I remember listening to it when I was younger and crying to the lyrics.

 I always wanted to find someone to love and feel that way about. Of course, I had boyfriends, I was 19 years old. But I didn’t love anyone.

 Love is just this phrase that gets thrown around too easy. I loved my family and friends, but romantically I had never really loved anyone.

 I had sex before, sure. My boyfriend, Dylan and I were together for 2 years so of course we did the deed. But it was just sex. I wanted to know what it was like and he was there.

 Sometimes I regret it, but then again it was fun, so I just say fuck it.

 “Hey y’all. I’m Savannah you’re waitress. Are you ready to order?” This brunette girl said. She was very pretty, tall and by the look on JC’s face he was definitely attracted to her.

 “Hey there Savannah… “ JC smirked, he obviously knew her from somewhere before. Savannah fake smiled at him and rolled her eyes.

 “Joshua… don’t you ever leave me alone?”

 “Not until you go on a date with me… come on… we’ll have fun…”

 “Yeah okay!” Savannah laughed in his face. JC looked annoyed and I just pretended not to hear anything. “So are you ready to order or not?”

 Justin found this all very funny and was desperately trying not to laugh.

 “No… but would you like to join us to eat? Maybe we could go for a ride in my car and then maybe you could ride something else later on.”

 “No that’s okay.” She rolled her eyes and sighed. “I’ll be back in a few minutes to take you’re order.”

 Savannah turned and walked away, her small black waitress outfit left nothing to the imagination and JC was drooling at that.

 I found this funny; I mean, JC the killer liked someone. He had feelings? To make it funnier was that he couldn’t even get the girl he liked.

 “I’m glad you find this amusing.” JC sneered at me. I looked at him and just smirked.

 “I can’t help it. You have no idea how to talk to a woman.”

 He raised an eyebrow at me and laughed bitterly. “Wow, Natalia, you must know a lot then… seeing how you must be a lesbian.”

 Justin stuck up his middle finger at JC. I just smiled and kissed Justin’s cheek.

 “Whatever, but yeah… here’s a piece of advice, don’t try to get in her pants the minute you see her. It’s a real turn off. Oh and quit staring at her rack, that’s great that you like them and all but look at her face.” I said to JC with my head leaning on my hand.

 “I was NOT staring at her chest.”

 “Man, don’t lie you so were!” Justin said and laughed. I joined in and giggled while JC shook his head.

 “So what if I stared? I couldn’t help it, she’s fucking hot!”

 “But if you wanna get her, that’s not the way to do it.” I explained to him.

 JC didn’t say anything, but the look he gave me was enough. I just dropped the subject and actually stayed quiet.

 Eventually Savannah came back and took our orders and such, JC took my advice. I felt proud!

 Other than that I was hoping a cop or something would come into the restaurant. Of course I had no luck, and even worse a bunch of guys that worked for Tommy were all over the place. Great. No chance to run, I’d be shot if I even tried.

 2 weeks. That’s all I kept telling myself. 2 weeks.

Chapter 7

 “Hey Natalia!” Hope said as she ran into my bedroom. It was sometime in the early morning. The T.V. weather channel said it was about 11 ish. Thanks to that great weather channel I had learned I was in Tampa.

 “Hey Hope…” I half smiled at her. She was practically beaming.

 “Do you wanna come golfing?”

 “Wow… that was random. Golfing as in somewhere or golfing as in here.”

 “Golfing as in here, but it’ll be so much fun. We get to drive around in the little mini carts, and Tommy is so funny when he golf’s. He gets so competitive.” Hope giggled a little and I couldn’t help but give in. It actually did sound fun, even though I was going to be golfing with a murderous drug lord.

 “Well okay.”

 “YAY!” She said enthusiastically. “Justin’s gonna be so happy. All that boy talks about is you. He’s really sprung on you, ya know that?”

 “Seriously?” I asked, a little nervous to that. Sure I knew Justin liked me, but it was scary too. He was nice and all and of course I had him wrapped around my finger, but again, he was my kidnapper.

 “Uh huh… I think it’s adorable. I mean you have to admit he’s super hot.”

 “Well duh! But is he… uh… normal?”

 “Normal?”

 “Yeah. As in not criminally insane like JC.” I made sure not to mention Tommy cause HELLO, she was nice and all but that was her fiancé.

 “No… well he is a little but we’re all a little crazy.” She laughed a little. I finally realized she was wearing a pleated yellow and red skirt and a red tank top. She definitely had the golfing theme going on.

 “Yeah… but you know what I mean.”

 “Girl none of them would hurt you. They need you alive and I spoke to Tommy, he promised he wouldn’t lay a hand on you. He’s more bark than bite.”

 I put on a dark blue golf dress in the bathroom and listened to Hope gush on about Tommy. She really had him on a high pedestal. To an outsider it would seem that his job didn’t bother her, but I really had a feeling that she hated this line of work that Tommy was in.

 Everything was so dangerous; I could picture her staying up and worrying about Tommy while he was out “working.”

 I shook the thought out of my head and walked out with her to the golf course. Yep, Tommy that son of a bitch had a golf course right in his backyard. Damn, I bet his house was bigger than Neverland Ranch. HAHA.

 Tommy was wearing matching clothes with Hope. It was actually kind of cute. He had on these yellow pants and the same red and yellow sweater that Hope had on.

 Justin looked adorable in his navy pants, white polo shirt and matching navy golf hat.

 “Good Morning Ladies.” Tommy said politely, while Justin just smiled at us.

 “Hi Thomas.” Hope smirked and gave Tommy a peck on the lips. I giggled at their cuteness and looked to Justin.

 “So have you ever played golf before?”

 “Never. But you’ll help me right?”

 “Of course. It’s not too hard, but it takes a lot of concentration.” Justin said and handed me a club.

 “I go first?” I questioned and he nodded.

 “Well yeah, I mean Tommy and Hope are too busy making out anyway.”

 I half smiled and watched as Justin put the ball on the tee. Yeah, I did take a glance at his ass. I couldn’t help it! I mean it was right there! God, I’m such a horny bitch sometimes.

 “Alright, now just hold the club, steady yourself, stand with your knees about 2 inches apart… and swing…”

 I listened to everything Justin said and still didn’t get it right. I ended up sending a wad of dirt about 2 feet. I heard Justin snicker and I turned and looked at him, giving him a dirty look.

 “Don’t worry… let me go and show you how to do it.” Justin grabbed another club from his golf bag and positioned himself. I stood behind him with a smirk on my face. He lifted his club to swing and I yelled behind him…

 “MISS!!!”

 Justin was startled and ended up hitting air. I cracked up laughing as he turned around and shook his head, laughing a little as well.

 “That was mean.”

 “Nope.” I giggled. He grabbed me by the waist and smiled, planting a small kiss on my lips.

 “Hey Tommy…it’s your turn!” Justin called to him, still holding me in his arms. Tommy looked annoyed as he pulled back from kissing Hope who was blushing.

 “If this weren’t golf I don’t think you’d be able to pull me away from kissing this beautiful lady!” Tommy exclaimed.

 “Yeah, Tommy and Justin have a little bit of a golf obsession.” Hope said and shook her head.

 “A little bit? That’s an understatement.” Justin replied with a short laugh.

 “Okay how bout I just watch you pros play?” I suggested and they both nodded.

 “I’m out too. I can’t understand this game and I don’t have the patients to learn.” Hope giggled and sat in the motorized golf cart.

 “Alright.” Tommy smirked and looked to Justin. “How bout we have a friendly wager. Just me and you.”

 “Sounds good to me.” Justin said with a sly smile. “How much?”

 “Let’s say… 50?”

 “50?! That’s it! You’re supposed to be these rich scary mafia guys. Make it more!” I said, while Hope burst out laughing.

 “Alright… Is 100 more to you’re liking?” Tommy asked me and I shook my head.

 “Make it 500.” I stated and Tommy just smiled.

 “Alright then. Winner gets 500 grand.”

 WHAT THE FUCK?! My mouth dropped when Tommy said this. 500 grand?! Jesus Christ!!! I thought they were talking like 500 dollars. HOLY SHIT!! That’s so sick that 500 grand was like chunk change to these fuckers.

Why couldn’t I be rich like that? Maybe I wouldn’t even be in this situation if I was born rich. I couldn’t help but be a little disgusted at this.

 Tommy and Justin shook hands and Tommy went first. The ball flew across the field with a loud whoosh sound. I couldn’t help but to be slightly impressed by his skill.

 “Hope, baby. Take score.” Tommy said to her, as Justin got ready to go.

 “Alright.” She said with a bright smile and jotted something down on a notepad.

 Justin swung and I was pretty sure his ball flew twice as far. He turned and grinned at me after and I rolled my eyes, but secretly I was impressed.

 “Alright. We need to find our balls.” Tommy stated and jumped into his car. I couldn’t help but to snicker at this.  Tommy sped away and I looked at Justin with an innocent smile.

 “Can I drive?”

 “Of course.” Justin hopped into the passenger’s side and I sat proudly in the drivers seat.

 Now, I am an okay driver but I’m not really that great. My mom makes me paranoid about driving so I have my license but she never let me drive. It never really bothered me though; since I lived in New York I could just take the train to go where I wanted.

 But right now I just wanted to be crazy and drive crazy.

 I hit the gas and sped down the field, immediately passing Tommy and Hope. I turned and waved at them before moving even faster.

 “Oh shit!! Slow down!” Justin was clinging to his seat and I giggled. I swerved the car and drove in a circle and then in a figure 8, before stopping promptly next to his ball.

 I hopped out of the car with a smirk on my face and Justin looked like he was going to be sick.

 “Remind me never to let you drive ever again.” He said and shook his head. I found this hysterical and just started laughing like crazy

 “Yeah, I guess you didn’t know that I can’t drive for shit.”

 “I’ll remember that for next time.” Justin rolled his eyes and got out of the cart.  Just then Tommy and Hope pulled up next to us.

 “What the fuck was that?!” Tommy barked. Justin just stood in front of me, sort of protecting me from Tommy.

 “She was just kidding, Tommy…”

 “ I don’t give a fuck! I don’t like that shit!” Tommy yelled and shoved Justin out of the way. He stood right in front of me, breathing heavily and I couldn’t help but to feel scared. “I don’t give a fuck if Justin lets you get away with that shit. But this is my FUCKING house! You don’t fucking act like that here!!”

 I swear to God I thought he was going to slap me across the face but Hope grabbed him and pulled him back.

 “Tommy… calm down. All right, she was kidding and she’s sorry. Let it go… please. For me?”

 Tommy instantly calmed down and took a deep breath before looking at Justin. “Alright, let’s get back to the game.”

 They both walked off, with Justin turning around and mouthing an “I’m sorry” to me. I couldn’t believe what just happened. I couldn’t believe the power that Esperanza had over Tommy. It was like he was Dr.Jekyll and Mr.Hyde and she was the elixir that changed him.

 I would hate to see Tommy if Hope left him.

 But for the rest of the afternoon, Hope and I watched the boys play golf. We didn’t say anything about Tommy’s outbreak earlier. I think she was a little embarrassed, but she dared not to say anything.

 I couldn’t help but to think of how lonely Hope must have been. I don’t think I saw her talk to anyone else but Justin, Tommy, JC and me. Maybe Tommy had her isolated from her family too.

 Maybe the key to getting out of here lied in Hope. Maybe I just needed to become closer with her, so I could find a way out of here sooner. I don’t think I could have survived another day in that hell if it wasn’t for the faith in my heart. I knew I was going to get out of there. I knew I had to. But I had to put my brain to the test. Even if that meant manipulating and hurting the two people that had been nice to me. Maybe nicer to me than my own family.

Chapter 8

Hope and I continued to watch the guys play. We made small talk about the weather and about some funny stuff our families did.

“My Mom takes rice and puts it in one of those big cracker bins. I think like every Hispanic person does that.” She giggled.

I smiled, thinking back to the way my mother used to make Congrese and Platanos on Sundays. I always used to hate making the salad and I’d always complain about it.

“Definitely.” I looked at Hope, deciding to ask her about her family. “So where did you live before this?”

“I lived in Brooklyn… but after I got engaged to Tommy… my family…”

“What happened?”

“My family disowned me…” Hope looked so sad and I couldn’t help but to feel terrible for her. “They didn’t want me to marry Tommy…I guess they don’t know how much I love him.”

I sighed for a moment, not wanting to make her upset, but wondering if I should speak my opinion to her. Of course it was none of my business, I mean I barely knew her to add my 2 cents, but maybe it was best.

“Sometimes love isn’t enough…” I sighed and gazed at Hope who just seemed to watch Tommy and Justin play. “Sometimes your family just wants the best for you…”

“But Tommy is the best for me…” She whispered, almost inaudibly.

“But are you actually safe with him, Hope? He doesn’t have a very safe life…”

“But he wouldn’t hurt me. Natalia, you don’t understand. I can’t walk away from him. I’ve tried.”

“Has he stopped you from leaving?” I questioned and she shook her head no.

“It’s not that he’s stopped me… it’s that I don’t want to leave him. I love him so much and I know he’s meant for me.”

“But what if you have children? You know that Tommy has enemies and they will and can come after you and hurt you and the kids.”

“I know what my risks are, Nat.” I don’t think Hope meant to be snippy but she was definitely annoyed. She knew everything but I don’t think she wanted to think about the consequences.

She was in love, and there’s in old saying that love is blind. I’m not only talking about looks, because Tommy is fucking hot and he’s definitely really great to Hope. But the truth was that he was dangerous and he was going to take her down to hell with him.

“YOU CHEATED!!” Tommy growled, pulling me out of my thoughts. I turned and saw Justin laughing while Tommy looked annoyed.

“I didn’t cheat. I’m just a better golfer than you. Now cough up the money!” Justin smirked and headed over to me. He wrapped his arm around me and gave me a soft peck on the lips.

“Eh. You fucker.”

Tommy pulled his wallet out and wrote out a check to Justin. He almost flung it at him and crossed his arms. Hope walked over to him and wrapped her arms around him.

“Don’t worry, we both know you’re a better golfer.”

Tommy smirked and kissed Hope softly.

“You see that. My woman knows I’m better than you.”

“Eh, she’s just blind because she loves you.” Justin retorted as I giggled. Tommy held up his middle finger and grabbed Hope’s hand.

“You’re an ass, Justin. But good game. You know I would have beat you if it wasn’t for that bad shot I had.”

“Fuck you man. I won and you lost. Get over it.”

Tommy and Hope started to walk away and my mind started to drift a little. What was I doing? Why was I kissing him and acting like he was my boyfriend?

Justin was a killer and a drug dealer. I couldn’t end up with someone like that. I needed to find my handsome doctor or lawyer.

I mean sure Justin had that whole sexy, rich thing going on and I mean I got along great with him. But he wasn’t the type of guy I was supposed to be with and raise children with.

This was exactly what I had just said to Hope. How could I be with someone that risked my safety? I mean sure I was having fun talking to Justin and kissing him, but after I got out of this hell, I didn’t plan on thinking of him ever again.

Maybe I was using him, but I really didn’t care. I wasn’t acting like myself anymore. It was like the real me was caged up and this emotional maniac was running my body and doing all these things I would never do.

But maybe I was reading too far between the lines. Justin was probably as lonely as I was and was maybe using me as much as I was using him. Maybe he wanted to have fun too.

God I needed to stop being so analytical.

**

“Do you wanna go eat something?” Justin asked me as the two of us walked through the gardens.

I had grown to really love the gardens. Especially at night, when it was only lit by the moon and the stars. It was just so captivatingly beautiful. Justin and I talked about life when we walked through the gardens. All the ways we’d been hurt in our lives and all the times that people actually proved that they loved us.

I saw that the both of us had very few of the love part.

Justin told me about his life and I was horrified to hear about his life. Justin had a great life up to when he was 8 years old. His mother and twin sister Jamie Samantha died in a car crash. Justin’s world was turned upside down. His father started to beat him in drunken rages, blaming all the problems on him.

He ran away when he was 15 and lived on the streets for about two years. Life wasn’t easy for him. Justin did numerous things to survive, things he wasn’t proud of. He worked numerous jobs and was barely able to make ends meet.

Eventually Justin met JC and began to sell drugs with him. At that time, Tommy’s father Joseph was the head of the crime family. Joseph became fond of Justin and JC, especially because of the loyalty they displayed. When Joseph retired, he made Justin and JC, Tommy’s 2nd in command.

The three of them became very close. But Justin never forgot the time when JC saved him from getting shot by an opposing mobster.

I couldn’t believe that as much of an asshole that JC was, that he actually did something good in his life.

I told Justin about how my father had a drinking problem and cheated on my mother. He left the house when I was 10. Since then I’ve gotten a few birthday cards from him and a handful of phone calls. But other than that, my father had nothing to do with us.

My mother struggled with two jobs, and never had time with us. My brother and I were made fun of in school for being what people called, poor. We couldn’t afford the same clothes that everyone else could, my brother got beat up everyday.

As if it wasn’t bad that we were tortured in school because we were Hispanic, now people got to say that we were the stereotypical poor Hispanics.

Our family never really bothered to help us, except our grandmother who died a few years later. The cost of the funeral took a lot out of us and my mother was forced to make my brother and I live with my Uncle Eduardo and his family for a few years.

My Mom finally married some guy and things changed. We were able to go back to the way we used to live. But things were never really the same. The family never had that closeness because my Stepfather was always there.

Sure he was a nice guy, but I just didn’t like him. He basically just ignored my brother and I, only talking to us if absolutely necessary.

What a great dad. Right?

I mean, my life wasn’t as bad as Justin’s because his was hell. But I was always the criticized child, growing up in my brother’s shadow. Nothing I could do was ever enough to establish myself as a separate person.

Enough about the past.

“I’d love to!” I exclaimed to Justin and the two of us, plus JC of course headed to Angels. This time we were in Justin’s navy blue jaguar. It was a gorgeous car and I got to sit up front with him.

The waitress Savannah was working there again and JC couldn’t take his eyes off her again.

I felt bad for Savannah for having to deal with JC. He was a scary fucker. Ick. I shuddered at the thought of having to sleep with JC. I mean he was hot but he was freaky. God knows what stuff he’d do in bed.

Whips and handcuffs. Ouch.

I’m such a horny bitch; it was fun to think about sex, especially with any one of these sexy psychos.

We sat down at the table and Savannah walked over to us with menus in hand. She placed them down in front of us and smiled.

“Hi Welcome to Angels… can I get you guys anything to drink?”

“Yeah I’ll have a vanilla coke.” Justin stated and I couldn’t help but to laugh at how similar we are.

“Ditto.”

“I’ll have a coffee…” JC said with a small smile. “And you’re number…”

“Uhm…no.” Savannah rolled her eyes and turned to me and Justin. “You’re drinks will be out in a second.”

Savannah turned and headed back to the front counter while JC stared at her.

“Do you have to come off so strongly? I mean of course she’s going to run away from you if you act like an asshole.” I said and played with the sugar packets on the table. I had developed this habit when I was younger and it was something that was just so hard to kick.

“I don’t mean to… I just want her to like me…”

“Then be less scary and demanding. Why don’t you try and ask her out somewhere? Tell her we’ll go so she won’t feel scared to be alone with you.”

“Okay…” He sighed. “But I swear if she hates me more I’m gonna make sure you never get out of your room.”

“Fuck you.” I glared at JC. Justin just rolled his eyes.

“Shut the fuck up man and go talk to her.”

JC got up and walked over to Savannah and I prayed to God that she would say yes. Maybe this would be my ticket to getting out somewhere

I sipped on my glass of ice water as JC and Savannah continued to talk. This had been going on for a good 15 minutes and the tension was building up.

I mean sure JC was talking to a chick he liked and was possibly going to get laid, but fuck! We were hungry!

Justin fiddled with the jukebox as I sighed and looked down at the menu for the hundredth time.

“So what are you ordering?” I asked Justin as he just shrugged.

“French Toast.” He said nonchalantly, as he continued to flip through the lists of songs. “You?”

“A grilled chicken Greek salad.”

Justin just nodded and finally stopped playing with the jukebox and put 50 cents into the machine. I glanced at him curiously as he punched some numbers into it and the original version of “Take My Breath Away” started to play.

Now I fucking adore that song, the old version especially. I mean I guess the Jessica Simpson version is all right, but it does not do justice to the original.

Some things just should not be tampered with.

“You dork. I love this song!” I said with a small giggle. Justin smiled at me and nodded.

“Me too. I don’t like the Jessica Simpson version though.”

“Me neither. The originals are always better.”

“Definitely. The remakes always sound too cheesy.” He said. I couldn’t believe how similar we both were. It was almost like we were the same person in so many ways.

JC came back and sat down with a smile glued to his face.

“She said yes. We’re going out clubbing tonight.”

            “That’s great man!” Justin exclaimed and sipped some of his Vanilla Coke that a waitress had finally brought to the table.

            “I know. Thank you so much Natalia.”

            “No problem.” I said with a small smile. “Just remember that in the future and don’t be an asshole to me.”

            “That’s a fucking promise.” JC responded and I grinned, not because of what he said, but because I was going out and possibly I would find my way out.

**

            I got dressed in my room, really excited to get the out. I scrunched my long brown hair and put on a black mini skirt with a red string belt. I put on a red and black one-strap top and a pair of red stillhettos.

            I sat at my vanity applying some pink gloss to my lips and staring at my reflection. I couldn’t believe what I had become. A manipulative bitch with nothing else in mind but my own personal gain.

            I hadn’t even thought of poor Savannah. She seemed like such a nice girl and only God knows what JC would do to her.

            He was insane; fuck everyone in this goddamn place was insane. I hated this feeling of having to watching my back all the time and having the constant fear that I was going to be hurt.

            I had a little more than a week left in this place, but I wondered if I would actually get out. Would my Uncle actually pull through and give Tommy the money?

            I had my doubts about that. My Uncle wasn’t really reliable and as much as I tried to believe that things would be okay, I had a feeling they wouldn’t.

            I didn’t want to die…so I knew I only had myself to rely on.

            “Hey there beautiful.”

            I turned to see Justin standing in the doorway. He looked gorgeous, wearing a pair of charcoal gray pants, a black Jack Daniels t-shirt and a black jacket over it.

            “Hey.” I smiled, getting up from the chair and placing a small kiss on his cheek.

            “You ready to go?”

            “Yeah… just let me get my bag…” I grabbed the simple black Chanel purse off of the dresser, which I had taken the time to fill with papers, a black marker, makeup and a small bottle of hairspray.

            Sure it was a bunch of seemingly normal stuff I was taking with me… right? But no… I had a plan for it all. Well… except for the makeup. That was to prettify me.

            Justin and I headed out the door to his black Escalade. We made small talk on the way to his car and he told me he had 8 cars and 5 motorcycles.

            I wondered how much he was worth. Maybe he would pay my ransom if I was nice enough to him? Hah… right.

            I got into his already running car in which JC was already sitting in the back. We drove down the road to Savannah’s apartment and I couldn’t tell you how nervous I was.

            This was my chance, and although my plan wasn’t brilliant or flawless, I was hoping it would work and get me out of my hell.

**

            We arrived at the club at about 8. There were long lines to get in but JC and Justin walked right up to the Bouncer who immediately let them in without even a word.

            It was like they were celebrities.

            Savannah and I were talking, she seemed really sweet and the two of us seemed to hit it off.

            “That outfit is so cute.” I commented and she grinned proudly. It was a tan skirt with a tiny white shirt that showed a lot of cleavage. She wore a pair of white go-go boots and a white tan bus boy hat. Savannah looked adorable.

            “Thanks. So is yours. I love your skirt.”

            “Thanks.”

            “So uh do you girls want anything to drink?” JC asked us as we were seated in the back of the dimly lit club. JC was looking very hot in his white pants, white wife beater and matching white jacket.

            Even crazy men could be cute.

            “Yeah uhm… just get me a black cherry wine cooler.” Savannah smiled at JC and I swear you could almost see him melt. I giggled lightly to myself.

            “I’ll have a cosmopolitan.”

            “The ultimate girly drink.” Justin laughed and shook his head.

”Oh shut up.” I playfully stuck up my middle finger at him and saw JC laughing. God. The sicko had a sense of humor. He was laughing. Dear God.

I think that was like the first time I saw him laugh in the few weeks I had known him. I took a wild guess and figured Savannah was the reason he was acting so giddy.

“Yeah! Stop lollygagging and go get us our drinks!!” Savannah laughed and I turned and looked at her.

“Lollygagging?!”

“I blame it on the drinks that I haven’t had yet.” She laughed. I could tell her and I were going to get along really well. I didn’t know if I should warn her about JC or if I should keep my mouth shut.

The guys walked off laughing and I awkwardly looked around the club, hoping to see a bouncer walking around that I could call for help.

“So… are you and Justin dating?”

“Huh?”

“Is he your boyfriend?”

“Justin? Uhm…. No I mean I barely know him…” I was so tempted to tell her I was kidnapped, but I held it back. What was I doing?

“Well y’all seem really close. He’s a great guy. I’ve known him for a few years now and I can tell he likes you.”

“Yeah I kinda figured that…” I didn’t mean to come off snippy but I guess I did. It was kind of weird to talk about Justin liking me. I sure as hell didn’t want to have a relationship with him.

I didn’t want to get with a hit man/ drug dealer, no matter how nice he was to me. My family would throw a fit and I eventually want to get married and I am so not bringing a child into this world with a mobster as its father.

“So do you like him?”

“He’s alright… do you like JC?” I had to change the subject. I couldn’t talk about Justin anymore and if I felt anything.

There was a tiny little part of me that did feel something but it was microscopic. It could definitely be erased at any given time.

I hate denial.

“JC’s okay… when he’s not being an annoying perv.”

“Yeah he can be a little scary sometimes…” I stopped saying anything else when JC and Justin walked back over with the drinks. I took my cosmopolitan from Justin’s hand and sipped it greedily.

“How bout we all dance a little?” JC suggested and Savannah grinned. The two of them went off to the dance floor and Justin looked at me.

“Should we join them?”

“Yeah just give me a second. I’m gonna use the bathroom… wherever it is..”

“Oh it’s right over there…”Justin pointed at a door on the opposite side of the club and I nodded, shooting him a smile. I headed to the bathroom and locked the door behind me, quickly going to work on my plan.

I grabbed my black sharpie marker and wrote on the wall of the bathroom, “HELP! My name is Natalia Fuentes and I’ve been kidnapped. I’m being held by Tommy Ryan and his gang of crazy people. If anyone sees this please contact the police or call (718) 555-6865 and tell Andrew or Isabel what you’ve seen. PLEASE!”

I closed the marker and looked proudly at what I had written in big letters. It was absolutely perfect and I had a feeling this was going to get me out of here.

I snuck out of the bathroom and saw Justin was waiting for me by the door. I forced a smile, wishing I could have run away from him and out of the stupid club.

“So you ready to dance.”

“Sure let me put my bag down first.” I headed down to the table and dropped my bag on the couch like seat and followed him to the dance floor.

“Naughty Girl” by Beyonce and Lil Kim was playing through the club as Justin and I started to dance on the packed dance floor.

Our bodies were rubbing up against each other. Song after song passed and time seemed to just pass us by. It was like all that was important was us.

I ran my hand down his face and stood up on my toes. Yeah, even with my heels I was nowhere close to his height.  I placed a small kiss on his lips, but the urgency between us grew and that small kiss became hot.

Before any of us knew it, there was a full-fledged make-out session going on. Now I wasn’t complaining. I was loving it actually.

But then… I heard Tommy’s voice.

“WHERE IS THAT STUPID BITCH? I’M GONNA FUCKING KILL HER!”

Justin and I pulled away from the kiss and we looked at each other curiously.

“Hold on.” Justin said and quickly walked over to Tommy. Tommy was enraged and after he got once glimpse of me, he stormed over in my direction.

I turned around, hoping that he was yelling at someone else, but it was me. I started to back up and finally I started running. I headed through the crowds of people until I finally reached a bouncer.

“Please! You’ve got to help me get out of here!”

“What’s going on? Is there a problem?” The large Bouncer asked me as I exasperatedly nodded.

“I’ve been kidnapped by this mobster. I know this sounds crazy but you need to call the cops!!”

The Bouncer looked at me and adjusted his big dark sunglasses. “Alright come with me…”

The bouncer roughly grabbed my hand and pulled my along. I looked around nervously as he pulled me right in front of Tommy and Justin. It seemed that Justin had been trying to calm Tommy down but it was certainly not working.

The two were standing in an empty VIP room.

“Here you go Boss.” The Bouncer said and tossed me to them. ”The little bitch had quite a mouth. Be careful with her.”

 Justin quickly grabbed me and I kicked at him.

“LET ME GO!!!! NOW!!!!”

“Shut the fuck up you little bitch!” Tommy stood in front of the both of us and I bit my lip, almost immediately stopping my actions.

“Why did you have to fucking go and do that?” Justin asked angrily. I don’t think I ever saw him so angry.

“Do what?!”

“Don’t play stupid!! You fucking wrote the note on the walls. One of Tommy’s workers saw it. I told you not to do something stupid like that!!!” He replied, his jaw was clenched in anger.

“Enough talking. She’s going back to my place and she’ll be lucky if she ever fucking sees the outside world again.” Tommy grabbed my arm tightly and pulled me outside to the car.

I fucked up. I really fucked up.

chapter 10

       I was shaking as Justin and I drove back to Tommy's mansion in silence. Justin was beyond angry with me and I was afraid for what my repercussions were going to be.

       I shouldn't have danced with Justin. I should have ran off, I should have just ran out of that fucking club. Screamed for help ... anything.

       I had set up my own death.

       I squeezed my eyes tight, hoping we would never reach our destination. My hair was whipping around by my face and my tears were dangerously close to falling. I refused to cry though, I refused to shed my pride for these psychos.

       Glancing at Justin, you could see how angry he was. His jaw was clenched and his eyes were fixated at the road. His knuckles were white from gripping the wheel with such a force that I had no idea how he was driving straight.

       Usually when you clutch the wheel tightly when you drive it makes the car swerve more, or so said my driving instructor when I learned how to drive.

       "Justin what's going to happen to me?" I finally asked and received no answer. The bastard was ignoring me.

       That couldn't be right. I didn't do anything wrong! All I did was try to get my fucking freedom back!!

       "Justin talk to me!!"
      
       "Now why should I do that?" He hissed back at me, still staring ahead. "You choose not to listen to what I said. Why the hell should I listen to you?

       "Because you’re an understanding, great, sexy man and I'm sorry..."

Justin rolled his eyes for a moment and then pulled over to the side of the road.

       "I don't know what Tommy's going to do...I told him to calm down first but he's really angry...as am I."

       "But Justin...put yourself in my place ... wouldn't you try to get out if you were kidnapped?"

       "Yeah but ... you used me..."

       "No I didn't!" I replied defensively. The dirty blonde haired male rolled his eyes at me.
 
    "There’s nothing I hate more than when someone lies to me. You know you never had feelings for me and this whole time you used me.."
 
    "That’s not true... I mean... I don't know." I sighed and looked away from Justin, feeling guilty. "This really isn't easy for me or fair. I didn't do anything wrong, your the one that kidnapped me!"
 
    "I know...and I know you hate me for it but I'm not sorry about it. I'm glad I took you with me the day of the robbery. I'm glad I got to know you and I'm glad I got to fall in love with you..."
 
    WHAT?! HE LOVED ME?!
 
    This was crazy. FUCK! This couldn't be happening to me. He couldn't love me.
 
    But he did and oh dear God. Why me? I mean sure, Justin was a really nice guy, but HE COULDN'T LOVE ME!!!
 
    My stomach started to go crazy and I really thought I was going to vomit right there. I just stared at him blankly while I tried to gather my composer.
 
    "You don't love me Justin..."
   
    "But I do. I've never been so sure of anything in my life. Natalia, you know my story, you know the pain I've been through, but I'm gonna be honest with you. These last 3 weeks with you have been the happiest of my life. You make me happy."
 
    I gnawed at the skin on my nail, not able to believe what was happening. Why? That’s all I kept asking myself. Why did I always get the wrong men to love me and under the worst circumstances.
 
    "But I'm going to leave soon and we'll never see each other again. You have to forget this..."
 
    He shook his head and reached out for my hand, placing a small kiss on it.
 
    "I don't want to forget this. The feeling you give me is too good. Natalia, I can't let you get away from me."
 
    "You’re going to have to Justin...when I leave... I don't want to think about this experience ever again. I'm going to erase this from my mind and never look back..."
 
    Justin looked at me, obviously hurt. How did he expect me to react? Did he really think I would jump into his arms and love him back?
 
    I couldn't go against my family and everything I believed to be right.
 
    He didn't say anything else; he just started the car up again and headed off to the mansion. I tried not to look at him for the rest of the ride.
 
    I did feel guilty, because of course there was something inside me that did feel for him and did want him. There was a part of me that was so angry with myself for not telling him anything and for not thanking him for being so wonderful to me.
 
    Justin was my rock throughout the whole trial, and I was indeed very thankful to him. But I couldn't become Hope. As much as I adored her, I didn't want to live her life.
 
**        
 
    I walked behind Justin as we entered Tommy's mansion. My heart was pounding in my chest. I had never seen the house this late at night.
 
    Everything was dark except for the moonlight that cascaded through the huge windows. It gave the house an almost eerie effect. I swear i was expecting to see a fucking ghost to pop out.
 
    "Where are we going?"
 
    "To Tommy's office." Justin replied coldly.
 
    He was mad at me. God. He was being unreasonable and certainly wasn't putting himself in my place.
 
    Why did he have to be so stubborn?! Why was everyone making me feel like I was the bad guy? I wasn't! God damnit, why couldn't anyone see that all of this wasn't fucking easy for me?!
 
    We headed into Tommy's Tony Montana replica office which made me mentally laugh every time I walked in. Did the Irish bastard really think he was Tony Montana? Hell he could just as well be but it was still really funny.
 
    My smile faded when I saw Tommy drinking a double shot of vodka with Hope at his side. She seemed like she was trying to calm him, I was sure he would probably kill me, but definitely not in front of her.
 
    "Natalia...Justin.... nice of you to finally join us." Tommy finished the last of his liquor and motioned to Hope to get another bottle.
 
    "Sorry...it was my fault..." Justin said, trying to cover my ass as usual. But Tommy raised his hand and stopped Justin.
 
    "Like hell it was your fault. This bitch has been nothing but trouble since she's gotten here. But she won't be any trouble anymore."
 
    "Tommy... what the fuck are you talking about?" Justin glared at him and Tommy shook his head. He had started laughing and poured himself another double shot.
 
    "I'm not gonna kill her you prick. But the little bitch is going to pay for what she did. Until her Uncle pays up she's staying in that room and not coming out. The balcony will be locked and off limits." Tommy quickly downed his drink again and pulled Hope onto his lap.
 
    "That’s reasonable." Justin replied but Tommy shook his head, a smirk on his face.
 
    "But I'm not finished. No one is to go see her. Not you or Hope or JC. She will be in confinement until its time for her to leave."
 
    "You can't do that!!" I spoke up, protesting to Tommy's decision. Hope just stayed silent and stared at the floor.
 
    "Oh but I can and I will. I told you this stay could be pleasant for you or it could be hell. You chose to defy me and now it will be hell. Now get the hell out of my sight."
 
    "NO!!" I screamed, even though I knew nothing would change Tommy's mind. Justin grabbed my arm and pulled me out of the room while the tears threatened to fall down my face.
 
    We headed up to the room and I tried to stop the motion. Almost something a child would do. I grabbed onto the banister of the staircase, refusing to let go.
 
    "Nat, come on...don't make this more difficult than it is."
 
    "I'm not going!!!"
 
    "You have to. Neither of us have a choice in this. Just go, it'll be easier on the both of us..."
 
    "It'll be easy on you but it won't on me. NONE OF THIS WAS EASY FOR ME!!!" I let go of the banister, clenching my hand into a fist. "You expect me to love you and to let you into my life... that’s bullshit. You don't know me...and you don't love me. You're keeping me a prisoner...if you loved me, you'd want me to be free and to be happy." I shook my head and breezed past him to my room.
 
    I opened the door and slammed it shut behind me. I grabbed a set of pajamas and locked myself in the bathroom. That night would be the last night I saw anyone for a long time.

I bit at my cuticles, staring at the white ceiling. I imagined being home and what it would be like when I saw my Mom and Andrew again. They were all I cared about seeing.

More tears fell from my eyes as I turned and stared out at the balcony. I wished that I would drop dead or by some miracle I could go home.

I was making myself sick and I couldn’t handle this anymore. I couldn’t be strong anymore.

Slowly, I sat up in my bed and stared at my reflection in the mirror. My face was puffy and red from crying so much. I didn’t even look like myself. I was disgusted with my reflection so I climbed out of the huge bed and ran myself a bath.

I think I was in that tub for almost 3 hours. When I finally got out I was so refreshed but I was still upset. I didn’t think anything was going to cure me but getting out.

I bit my lip and dried myself off. I let out a sigh and pulled on my black silk bathrobe.

Shaking from my nerves, I headed back into the bedroom and sat on the edge of my bed.

I’m not one for prayer, but I decided that I needed some sort of guidance or some way of just releasing my emotions in a way other than just crying and making myself sick. I decided to pray to my Abuela, throughout life she was always wonderful to me and always gave me strength, I hoped now she could help me too.

I turned toward the window and clasped my hands together. I sat silent for a second before starting to pray.

“Abuela…I’m so scared. I don’t know if I can do this anymore. I’ve been trying so hard to be strong, but I can’t anymore. I’m so scared that I’m never going to be able to go home. Please, give me the strength to keep going. Help me to survive another day without going crazy.”

I closed my eyes for a moment and rested my head on my hands. I took a second to gather myself up and then resumed my prayer.

“Please let me get out of here soon. Abuela, tengo miedo. I’m afraid they’re going to kill me. I’m not ready to die. I want to finish school and get a good job and get married and have children…I have so much left that I want to do. Protect me…”

I opened my eyes again and looked out the window at the beautiful sunny day. I wished I could bask in that sunlight and I wished I could feel whole again.

I turned around and saw someone standing behind me. It was Justin holding a tray of food in his hands.

“Hey…”

“What are you doing here?” I questioned, curious to the fact of why he was betraying what Tommy ordered him to do.

“I came to see you obviously.” He placed the tray down on the table as I watched him. “You don’t look too happy to see me.”

“Well I just don’t understand why you’re here. I mean Tommy said you weren’t supposed to see me.”

“It’s funny what a little bribery and ass kissing can do.”

“I don’t think I even want to know what you did.” I shook my head and pulled my bathrobe tighter around me.

“You probably don’t. But I basically moved hell and earth to see you.” He crept over to me and kissed me softly. “I’m sorry about everything.”

“Are you really?” I pulled away from his kiss and headed toward the window so I could stare outside. So sure I was being a frigid bitch. I didn’t care. Nothing was worth caring about right now.

“Natalia…”

“Yes…? That’s my name.”

“Please don’t be like this. I’m trying…”

“I don’t give a fuck if you’re trying. You didn’t give a fuck that I was. You just expected me to adapt.”

Justin grabbed my arm and turned me around so I could face him. I reluctantly looked at him as he sighed.

“I know I was wrong and I’m sorry. You shouldn’t have to forgive me for being a jerk to you, but I wish you would.”

And there I went, feeling guilty and forgiving. What was I doing? I never forgive people. It’s like this unwritten rule I have.

How the hell could I be forgiving him for kidnapping me? HOW?! It was like someone took an eraser and just erased every bit of anger and resentment I felt toward him.

I shook my head for a second and looked up at him.

“It’s okay…”

“You really forgive me?”

“Yeah I do…”

He leaned in and hugged me tightly. I was shocked with everything I was feeling. How could I want to kiss him? How could I want him so badly?

I was angry with myself now. I couldn’t believe how easily I could just forget the hurt and pain. But I knew it wasn’t his fault. This was his job… it wasn’t personal.

If I just had been more pleasant, I wouldn’t have been suffering these past 5 days. If I would have just listened to what Tommy and Justin and JC instructed me to do I would be happier and not so upset.

“I heard you praying before…”

“You were spying on me?” I raised my eyebrow at him and crossed my arms.

“No I just heard what you were saying and I didn’t want to disturb you.” Justin sighed and looked down. “You know I wouldn’t ever let anyone hurt you. I would die before that.”

“I know…”

“And I don’t care if you don’t love me… I love you Natalia.”

I took a deep breath, knowing in my heart that he wasn’t lying. My eyes started to tear up and I couldn’t bear to look at him.

I knew if I did his striking cerulean eyes would draw me into him.

“Justin you’re a really great guy…but you should try to forget me…”

“That’s the thing… I tried to… I tried to tell myself that you don’t love me and you never will. But I don’t care. I can’t stop loving you.”

“Justin…you can’t…”

He shook his head and leaned in closer to me his forehead was pressed against mine. His lips were mere millimeters away from mine.

God I just wanted to kiss him so badly.

“I can’t help what I feel…” He exhaled and his warm breath against my skin sent chills up my spine. “Sometimes you just have to listen to your heart.”

“…What is your heart telling you…?” I was melting right there. I couldn’t believe that.

Sure Justin was nice to me most of the time and I trusted him because he’d never once lied to me; he was just so kind and gentle with me.

I knew I could fall for him.

“My heart is telling me to kiss you…” Justin leaned in softly and captured my lips.

He pulled me into his arms and my heart started to race. I couldn’t believe I was doing what I was doing. I couldn’t believe that I was ready to have sex with him right there and then after being so damn angry not too long ago.

I wrapped my arms around him and pressed my body closer to him. He seemed shocked by the fact that I actually kissed him after all of this.

To tell you the truth, by one look at this gorgeous man, I was seduced. I had been battling this feeling for so long, but now, things just didn’t matter anymore.

I didn’t know if I was going to get out, and I wanted some fun.

I tugged at his shirt, unbuttoning the buttons one by one. I was going tantalizingly slow, teasing him with my actions.

I let his shirt fall to the floor and ran my hands up his sculpted chest. I placed a small kiss on his nipple and swirled my tongue around it. He moaned lightly and I smiled, forcing him back on the bed.

I ran my tongue across my lips and opened my bathrobe, letting it fall down to my feet. A smile formed on Justin’s face as I crawled onto the bed on all fours, just in my pink panties.

I headed toward him with a smile on my face. I sat in between his legs and unbuttoned his pants. His hands immediately reached toward my breasts and caressed them as I worked on removing his pants.

As soon as his boxers were off I attacked his massive penis. God he had a nice dick. Hmm… I leaned down and licked his mushroom tip lightly, causing him to shiver. 

I grasped his hard cock with both my hands and began to suck on his tip. Justin closed his eyes and grasped onto the sides of the bed.

Loving the taste of his pre-cum that leaked into my mouth, I took his cock out of my mouth and licked at his tip again, making sure to get every drop.

I sat on him, straddling him and looking down into his eyes. I bit down on my lip and smirked.

“Hmm…that mouth of yours is amazing…” Justin commented as I smiled. I leaned down and kissed his neck, rubbing my breasts against his rock hard chest. “No more games baby… tell me what you want.”

Justin’s hands wandered down to my ass and squeezed it lightly. I moaned and breathed against his neck.

“I want you…”

“What do you want me to do baby?” He smirked and licked his lips at me.

“I want you to fuck me…”

“But how do you want it baby… tell me.”

Kinky bastard wanted me to talk dirty to him. I smirked a little and sucked on his earlobe, before whispering his ear.

“I want you to take that great big dick of yours and ram it right into me. I want you to show me how much you love me…”

I kissed his lips as he sat up and pushed me down onto my back. Justin climbed on top of me and kissed my lips with such passion that it dizzied me. His hands grazed my breasts until they finally reached my panties. With a swift motion he pulled them off me and looked down at my body.

His eyes drank in my image as he kissed me and let his hand wander down in between my legs. Justin’s finger slid across my slit and my breath caught in my throat. He was making me feel so good.

“Mmm… you’re so wet. You do want me don’t you…” Justin moaned in my ear. I licked my lips and nodded at him.

Justin moved his hands away from my pussy and thrusted his penis inside me. With that motion I betrayed my entire family and myself.

I did feel guilty, especially because I couldn’t give him what wanted. He wasn’t getting a relationship, I mean the man was in love with me and I could never love him back.

I was using him.

Justin slid in and out of me at a teasingly slow pace. My body ached for him to move faster. I leaned up and kissed his neck and made my way up to his ear.

“Justin… please…don’t tease…” My voice sounded hoarse, it was this erotic tone that I could tell really turned him on.

He listened to exactly what I wanted and started to move in and out of me faster. Justin definitely knew how to move and how to please a woman.

I licked his pouty lower lip, and began to suck on it slowly. I felt him smile and I looked up into his eyes.

I don’t think I’d ever seen that look in his eyes. He just seemed so happy and again I felt guilty. I mean of course, I was happy to see that he was so happy, it was just the whole using thing. 

But I couldn’t say that I wasn’t happy either. I was enjoying this all so much and I was glad that I was having sex with him. There was no one I’d rather be having sex with.

GOD! I just wished I could know how I felt. I wished I wasn’t so fucking confused about everything.

As Justin rammed his dick into me, I purposely tightened my walls around him, making him close his eyes and let out this loud moan. It made me smile and I kissed him softly.

His tongue wandered into my mouth and I softly sucked on it and massaged it with my tongue. I cupped his face in my hands and ran them through his short red-brown hair.

“I love you…” He whispered to me after he pulled away from our amazing kiss.

“I love you too…” It came out so naturally and I felt horrible for saying it when I wasn’t even sure if I meant it. But at the same time, when the words came out, they just felt so right.

Justin smiled at me and a tear fell down his face. I wiped the tear away with my thumb and looked at him confused.

“Are you okay?”

“No one’s ever said that to me before…”

My stomach started to ache, but I tried to ignore the pain. I just kissed him softly and decided to focus on the amazing pleasure he was giving me.

His hands grazed my thighs until he finally lead them up around his hips. I clung to his body and got lost in the amazing sex he was giving me.

I moaned softly, holding his hand tightly. “Justin I’m gonna…uhh…”

“Me too…”

His powerful thrusts increased and finally the both of us came together. It was an amazing feeling. I closed my eyes, loving the warmth I felt.

I was just in this state of mind where I felt so safe and so happy. I couldn’t believe it. Nothing else mattered to me except that moment.

We stared into each other’s eyes, until he finally pulled out of me and laid down next to me.

If things wouldn’t have changed, I would have been happy. If I wouldn’t of reacted the way I did to what he confided to me, then maybe I would have stayed that happy and in that warm place.

But things never go the way you plan them. Always expect the unexpected.

Chapter 12

“God you’re so beautiful…” Justin kissed my forehead after we had sex for the 3rd time that afternoon.

“Thanks…” I turned so I could face him and ran my hand down his face. I was blushing a little and I could tell he thought that was adorable by the way he was grinning at me.

“Did you mean what you said?”

“About what?” I questioned, playing with the JT necklace that adorned his neck.

“When you said you loved me, did you really mean it?”

I looked up at him with a smile forming on my face. I did think I meant it, I mean sure I wasn’t 100 % but I did think so. He gave me butterflies in my stomach, and okay he was my kidnapper but it wasn’t by choice.  I leaned up and placed a small kiss on his lips.

“Yeah… I do.”

He wrapped his arms around me tighter and the smile on his face never seemed to fade.

“I wanna give you something…” Justin sat up in the bed and fumbled through his pants looking for something in his pocket.

“You don’t have to give me anything…” I watched him curiously, and played with the edge of the comforter.

“No… I want to. I’ve wanted to give it to you since the night at the club but I didn’t really get the chance to…” There was a small black box in Justin’s hand and when he opened it, I couldn’t help but to gasp.

It was a beautiful necklace, a 3 stone diamond pendant with a beautiful diamond crusted chain. It was all in platinum and it was just stunning.

“Justin… oh my God…”

“You like it?”

“I love it!” I threw my arms around him and hugged him tightly, placing kisses all over his face. He carefully put the necklace on me and I couldn’t stop smiling.

“It looks gorgeous on you…” He stated, I ran my hands over the necklace and beamed at him.

“Justin… you didn’t have to do this… this must have been really expensive…”

“Don’t worry about it…” Justin grinned at me and kissed my neck lightly.

“Thank you though.” I leaned up and kissed his lips softly. The kiss started to get more heated but Justin pulled away.

“Before we start round four…we need to talk…”

“About what?”

Justin sighed and ran his hand through his hair. I pulled my bathrobe back on and watched him.

“Justin is everything okay?” I asked. He was just staying quiet and it seemed like something was wrong. “Please don’t tell me you have an STD or something…”

“No!!” He exclaimed. I couldn’t help but to laugh a little.

“Then what it is?”

“Nat, you have to promise you won’t be mad at me…”

“I’m not promising anything until you tell me what’s wrong.” I sat on my legs and watched as he pulled his boxers on and began to pace around the room.

“I just want you to know that I love you…”

“Are you dying?!” I interrupted, as he shook his head and sighed.

“No, it’s nothing like that. I’m not sick or dying… it’s just hard for me to tell you.”

“Justin, just tell me. It’ll be a lot easier if you just say it. I’m sure it can’t be that bad.”

Boy, was I wrong about that one.

“Alright, Nat…” Justin sighed and bit his lip. “I was the one that shot your brother. Not JC.”

I stopped, not able to believe what he said. It couldn’t be true. This had to be a lie.

“No Justin… you didn’t…”

“It was me…He started to come toward me and I had no other choice…” Justin looked at me, begging for me to understand him.

“Get out.”

“No… I’m not leaving Natalia. I didn’t want to hurt him or you. I’m sorry…”

“I DON’T GIVE A FUCK!!! GET OUT!!!!” I screamed, getting off of the bed and holding myself up by clinging to the night table.

“Nat… please…” He walked toward me and I screeched. I grabbed the lamp and chucked it at him.

“GET OUT!!!!” I was trembling with anger. I couldn’t believe he did this to me. He made me think that I could trust him, when in reality he had tried to murder my brother.

“Natalia, I love you… please… we can work through this…” He had managed to dodge the lamp I chucked at him and kept walking toward me.

“Love?! LOVE?! WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU KNOW ABOUT LOVE!!!! YOU’RE JUST A COLD BLOODED KILLER!!!! YOU DISGUST ME!!!! I HATE YOU!!!!!!”

He closed his eyes for a minute, feeling the pain from the words I had said to him.

“What the fuck is going on in here?!” One of Tommy’s men came into the room with a big gun in his hand.

I headed straight for the bathroom and locked the door shut behind me. I slumped down to the floor, shaking.

“NATALIA OPEN THE DOOR!!” Justin’s fists were coming down hard on the large wooden door.

“JUST LEAVE ME ALONE!!!!”

I thought I was going to be sick. I slumped down onto the cool tile of the floor and ignored Justin’s pounding on the door. It seemed almost hypnotic after a while.

Tears pooled my blue eyes as I stared up at the ceiling, feeling so disgusted with myself. I slept with the person who ruined my life and tore my family apart. I slept with the man who tried to kill my brother.

I was even more determined then ever to get out of this hell.

**

When the knocking and yelling died out for a while, I finally came out of the bathroom and got dressed. I didn’t care if I had to die trying, I was going to get out of this hell.

I put on a pair of Manolo Blahnik boots, low cut jeans and a black button down shirt. I headed toward the balcony and grabbed the other lamp from the opposite night table. I took one last look at the glass door and smashed the glass open.

An alarm went off and I silently cursed. I hadn’t thought of the possibility that Tommy might have an alarm in his house.

I grabbed the rope of sheets I made and ran out on the balcony. I tied the rope to the balcony and quickly climbed down to the ground.

As soon as my feet hit the ground, I ran to the garage and spotting Justin’s jaguar with the door open and the keys in the ignition.

I smirked to myself thanking God for the good luck and jumped into his car. The alarm would act as the distraction I needed.

I pulled out of Tommy’s garage and headed toward the gate. Increasing the speed I managed to knock the gate down, but denting Justin’s car a hell of a lot.

I zoomed down the road unsure where I was going, until I heard a voice from the backseat.

“Natalia?” I looked in the rear view mirror and spotted Hope sitting up.

FUCK!!!!!!!

I had Tommy Ryan’s fiancé in the car with me. GREAT! I was fucked I was really fucked.

“Oh my God. Hope… I didn’t know you were here…”

“Don’t worry… just keep driving…”

“Huh?” I questioned, raising an eyebrow as I glanced up in the mirror.

“You and I had the same idea…I was planning on getting out when Justin was going for a ride. But he got distracted when the alarm went off.”

“Yeah… I guess I made my break… come sit in the front.”

Hope climbed into the front seat and sighed a little.

“Make a right on Court Street, we need to get to Orlando.”

“Hope, maybe it’s not my business, but why did you leave?” I turned right like she said and kept driving, always looking back to see if anyone was following us.

“I got sick and tired of it. I hated Tommy’s lifestyle, I gave him the ultimatum to change but he didn’t even bother. It was like he didn’t even care.” Hope’s eyes started to tear and I felt sorry for her. “It was like I was his prisoner instead of his fiancé.”

“Then the hell with him. You’re too good for him Hope. You don’t need him.”

“I know but I don’t know what to do with my life now…”

“Come to New York with me, Hope.” I suggested and she half smiled. “You can start over, you won’t be the fiancé of Tommy Ryan, you can be yourself.”

“You’re right…we’ll figure something out…”

I headed down to Orlando, occasionally coming across some cars that followed us. I would speed up and loose them, but it got really scary, especially when one of the cars tried to run us off the road.

When we got to Orlando, Hope showed me a Police Station that Tommy wasn’t bribing. It was scary that we had to drive so far to find a place that wasn’t under Tommy’s control.

Hope and I burst into the police station and I quickly called my family. My Mother was screaming, insanely happy that I was all right.

She bought us two tickets back to New York, and Hope and I headed home.

I hoped to leave behind my trauma, but in reality, the story was just beginning. This wasn’t the last time that Hope and I would have to deal with the Ryan Crime family.

Chapter 13

When Hope and I arrived back in New York, my Mother and Andrew were there to greet us at the airport. It felt like forever since I had seen them. My Mother refused to let me go. She kept hugging me, crying and screaming in Spanish.

Andrew stood with his arm in a cast and embraced us both. I started to cry a little, both from the happiness and sadness. Everything I had been feeling in the past months came out.

“Natalia… mijita… forgive me.” My Mom said through her tears. I refused to let her go and sighed.

“Mami… it’s over… it’s over and we never have to think about it again…”

“Are you stupid? They could come back for you. You have to go to the police!” Andrew edged me on but I closed my eyes.

“I just want to forget about it.”

I told myself at the time that I wouldn’t go to the police more for Hope than for me. She was still in love with Tommy and I knew she didn’t want to hurt him, she just wanted to break free.

We all got in the car and headed back to my house. Hope was going to stay with us until she was able to get her own apartment and a job.

What I didn’t realize was that things were different and wouldn’t be the same.

**

I had been settled back in my house for a few weeks. I decided to take the semester off being that I was way behind on all my work.

Hope and I had been looking for jobs and came across one working as waitresses at this bar in Soho. Hope took the job but I wasn’t allowed to.

It seemed like my family had me on this really short leash now. I couldn’t stand it. I mean if I wasn’t smothered enough living with Tommy, my family didn’t let me do anything.

I understood that they were worried, but I needed my freedom too. That’s when I decided to move out. I had a bunch of money saved up and my best friend, Ricky was looking for two roommates.

It was time for this little girl to grow up.

“Mami…We need to talk.”

My mother was busily washing dishes after the huge breakfast she had cooked. She had the radio blasting 93.1 and “Bidi Bidi Bom Bom” by Selena was playing.

“Que paso?” She questioned as she busily scrubbed the frying pan. Of course we had a dishwasher but my Mom felt it was more efficient to clean things by hand.

“Mami… I’m moving out…”

“No you’re not.” My Mother continued to scrub and the pan with the brillo pad in her hand. She barely even bothered to look at me and that pissed me off.

“Yes I am. I already have an apartment. I’m leaving this weekend.”

She dropped the pan in the sink with such a force that I jumped back. My Mom is just about 5 foot, but for a little woman, she can be really scary. Isabel Fuentes turned and looked at me.

“You didn’t even bother to tell me?! Where are you moving to and with what money?! You’ve never worked a day in your life!! I’ve made sure of that, Natalia!”

“I had money saved, Mami. I just think it’s time for me to go on my own.” I crossed my arms, showing her that I was serious. The petite woman just glared at me.

“You’re not leaving this house. You’re still a nina.”

“I’m 19 years old. I’m an adult, Mom. I’m moving out, it’s going to be Hope, Ricky and me.”

“Ricky?!” She screeched. “ESE PATO?! NO!!”

“So what if he’s gay?! There’s nothing wrong with that!!!” I yelled back at her, knowing instantaneously that I shouldn’t have done that. “I’m leaving Mami, there’s nothing you can do to change my mind.”

My Mother burst out crying, and I started to feel guilty. Playing with the necklace Justin gave me that never left my neck, I sighed.

“Mami I’m not moving far. I just want to grow up and be on my own…you guys baby me too much.”

“Natalia, you were kidnapped! I just want to keep you safe!”

“You can’t keep me safe forever. You can’t shelter me. I have to live my own life!”

My Mother sighed, knowing that I was right. I hated how this had to be, but I needed to be on my own. I needed to grow up and I had a feeling that in that house I wasn’t going to be able to do that.

**

Hope and I had finished moving into Ricky’s apartment. It was the huge loft apartment and was just so awesome.

“I have a feeling you girls are really going to like it here.” Ricky said as he flipped through the channels.

Now Ricky is really hot, he’s tall with brown hair and brown eyes, and I swear if he wasn’t gay I’d be all up on him. Hope thought he was gorgeous and hell I don’t blame her.

They both became fast friends, it was great to see Hope adapting. Even though I still heard her crying at night for Tommy. She told Ricky and me that he was her only love. She didn’t think she could or wanted to love anyone else again.

Ricky told her not to think that. He said there was always hope. You gotta love him.

“I think so too.” Hope plopped down on the couch next to Ricky and smiled.

“You know, this is like threes company, except Ricky really is gay.” I giggled and sat on the opposite side of Ricky, leaning my head on his shoulder. “By the way when am I meeting your boyfriend?”

“When I’m sure you won’t scare him away.” Ricky grinned at me as he chewed on a carrot stick. “Hope, the last time I introduced her to one of my boyfriends she asked him a million questions and then threatened she would kill him if he hurt me.”

“That’s Natalia for you.” Hope laughed and grabbed the remote from Ricky’s hand, turning on General Hospital.

“Oh shut up!” I laughed and pulled my long hair up into a ponytail.

“So Hope… did you see Natalia’s brother?” Ricky inquired, with this sly smile on his face.

“Hell yeah. That guy is fucking hoooooot!” Hope said with a laugh. Ricky grinned and nodded his head.

“He is!!! Too bad he’s not gay. Maybe I could turn him.”

“You’ll have to fight me for him.” Hope said with a laugh.

“Bring it bitch!” Ricky replied, laughing, I rolled my eyes and made a gagging motion.

“That’s gross!!! That’s my brother!!”

“So?!”

“You need help, Rick. AND, you have a boyfriend.” I stated smugly and stuck my tongue out at him.

“Louis is hot and all… but I can still dream about Andrew…”

“AND THE MYSTERY BOYFRIEND HAS A NAME!!” I screeched while Hope laughed.

“He’s not so mysterious, I met him!”

“I didn’t!! That’s no fair!!”

“Like I said before, you’d scare him away.” Ricky replied and munched on another carrot stick. I pouted at him and crossed my arms.

“I’ll be good when I meet him! I promise!! Please Rick?!”

“Fine…but I swear, if you do anything to embarrass me I swear to God I’ll dig up the pictures of you from prom night.”

Yeah, Rick went with me to prom when I was a senior. I had gone to an all girl Catholic High School and Rick was my only guy friend. He had promised to go with me and we had a great time together.

Although I got drunk with a bad hangover and some parts of prom are fuzzy, I had a great time. Especially from the scary pictures Rick took of me dancing on a car like a retard.

Basically, Rick would always be my best friend and do anything for me. He’s more like family than anything else.

“Rick!! I’ll be good I promise!”

“Good.”

**

This whole time back in Florida, chaos was going on in the Ryan Mansion. Tommy had fallen into a state of depression when Hope left him. He constantly replied there last meeting in his mind.

“Tommy, you shouldn’t do this to Natalia. It’s crazy and you know if someone was holding you prisoner, you’d try to get out too.” Hope said, following him to his wet bar as he poured himself another glass of brandy.

“Either way she disobeyed me and she should be punished. Not you or Timberlake will stop me from doing so.” Tommy downed his brandy and Hope glared at him.

“You’re an asshole, Tommy.”

“Hope, I frankly don’t care what you say. I’m protecting my work and I’m not letting the bitch go. I’ve told you many times before, stay out of my work. It doesn’t concern you.”

“Everything is work to you isn’t it Tommy.” Hope shook her head in disgust. “Common decency would say to let the poor girl go and forget it. But you don’t have that do you Tommy. You’re not even human. You’re a monster!”

Tommy flung his glass of brandy at Hope. She looked shocked as it hit the wall right next to her.

“Just shut the fuck up and get the fuck away from me.” Tommy hissed at her. Never once had Tommy ever cursed at her or acted in a violent way toward her.

Hope ran out of the room in tears and Tommy just watched her go, drinking himself into another state of consciousness.

Constantly Tommy thought back to that day. He wished it were different, he wished he would have let Natalia go.  If that were what it would take to have his Hope with him again then that’s all that would matter.

The business was falling apart and Joseph Ryan had to step in and take his role as leader again. Joseph only said that it would be till Tommy got back on his feet and got over Hope.

Tommy wasn’t sure if that would ever happen.

“Women come and go all the time, Tommy. You should never get too attached to them. They’re all greedy little whores, only after your money.”  Joseph Ryan kept trying to drill into Tommy’s brain, but it didn’t work.

Tommy knew Hope was different, he just needed to change for her and then he would be able to get her back. First he needed to find her.

The letter Hope left Tommy didn’t say much. It just said that she was leaving him and never coming back. The letter was cold, and not at all like his sunshine. How Tommy missed his sunshine.

Justin was doing just as bad as Tommy. He moped around most of the time, just thinking about his few moments of happiness. No one woman had ever loved him before and this feeling was just so new.

But then again, while Natalia was on Justin’s mind, it distracted him. Justin had almost been killed because of his carelessness.

That was when Joseph Ryan had to get back in charge. He could not let his business that he had worked so hard for to fall apart.

Joseph was going to take matters into his own hands. He had hired a Private Investigator to head to New York. As soon as he found the sources of Tommy and Justin’s pain, he would bring them back and force them to love again.

Chapter 14

Summertime in New York City is a crazy time. There’s endless nights at clubs, long days lounging at the beach and horrible mornings with killer hangovers.

When summer began officially on Memorial Day Weekend, I promised Hope and Ricky we’d start the summer off right.

We were going to club hop till we dropped from exhaustion or drank way too much.

I ran around the apartment like a headless chicken as I searched for an outfit. I wished that I did my laundry more often at that point.

I picked up the phone that was ringing off the hook and greeted my mother who yelled at me for never calling her.

“Mami, I’ve just been really busy, I’m sorry.”

“It’s okay.” She sighed. “Un hombre came to the house looking for you.”

“Huh? Who was it?”

“He looked like he was about 50. He said something about wanting to talk to you about a job.”

“A job?” I scratched my pin straight hair, trying to figure out who it could be.

“Si… something about a Secretary…”

“Oh my God… I applied for that job in like March. I don’t want it now.” I rolled my eyed and chucked my clothes around my room. “That’s weird, why would they go to your house Mami?”

“I don’t know, I thought it was rado.”

“Hmm… well if you hear anything else Mami, call me. I’m going out to a party tonight.”

“Another one?”

“Yes, Mami, another one. I need to get ready, I love you, bye!!” I hung up the phone quickly and rolled my eyes.

Gah! I loved my mother but she could be really annoying sometimes. I realized I needed to be careful, but I was 19. I wanted to have my fun.

I sighed and dug out a pair of long bar earrings and put them on. My hair was scrunched and up in a ponytail. The earrings helped to dress up my hair.

I ran down the hallway searching for my Clinque lip-gloss as the phone started to ring again. I groaned and picked up the portable.

“Hi How can you help me?” I said, stealing Rick’s catchphrase for answering the phone.

“Natalia, this is Mr. Fatone. I just wanted to tell you that some guy was here at the Bar looking for you.”

“Uhm… who was it?”

“He said he was an old friend… your teacher from photography in high school.”

“Mr. Stevenson?” I said confused. What the hell would he be doing looking for me.

“Yeah… I gave him your address, he said that he needed to give you back some picture from a contest…”

I couldn’t believe it. The picture I had one first place for taking in the Kodak Originality Photo Contest. Mr. Stevenson told me I’d never see the picture again and I couldn’t believe I was getting it back.

“Wow… uh… well…I was about to head out but thanks Mr. Fatone.”

“Oh wait, Natalia, I was wondering, do you wanna go out with me tonight?’

I paled suddenly, not able to believe that Joey Fatone asked me out. He was my boss, and very nice but also MARRIED with a fucking child!!!!

“Uhm… I’m busy… I’m going out with my boyfriend Ricky.” I lied, covering my ass. Mr. Fatone had seen Ricky many times when he came to visit Hope and I at work.

Ricky also pretended to be my boyfriend a lot of times when scary men hit on me. I did the same for him when he was in a scary situation.

This tradition began in junior year, when this girl stalked him. Ricky hadn’t admitted that he was gay, so he dated girls to please his family. But he had this one girl stalking him. I of course found it funny, but he begged me to bail him out.

It’s been a tradition we’ve held up to all these years.

“Oh… I thought he was gay…”

“No he isn’t.” I lied and headed towards my room. “Well Mr. Fatone, I’ll see you tomorrow. Bye!”

I quickly hung up and sighed. Good God, I seemed to be getting all the crazy men lately. Justin, Joey…

God why did I think about him? Justin… the psychotic man who kidnapped me, who shot my brother, who loved me, who I had sex with.

I felt so dirty for sleeping with him. Ricky and Hope couldn’t believe it when I told them. Hope figured it would happen eventually, but Ricky was shocked that I would do that.

Ricky claimed that I had to have cared about him to have slept with him. I didn’t think it was true. I thought that maybe I was just lonely and scared and Justin offered me a little comfort. Ricky laughed at my opinion.

He could be so stubborn sometimes.

**

I made my way to the bar, Desire. I looked like a hooch, wearing a short gray skirt. It was pretty, with different shades of gray adorning it. I placed on a simple black tube top the clung to my body and showed off my huge chest.

Yeah, I knew I looked good.

I headed through the crowded bar and saw Ricky downing a shot of some funky looking drink. I jumped on his back and placed a big kiss on his cheek.

“HI!” I screamed in his ear. He laughed and grabbed my arm.

“You need a boyfriend Natalia.” Ricky shook his head at me and I rolled my eyes. “Too bad the only guys I know are gay.”

“And the straight ones you know are scary.” I laughed and sat down next to him on the barstool. I ordered a drink and looked at Ricky.

“Maybe you’re just picky.”

“You’re annoying.” I rolled my eyes at him and smirked. “So where’s Louis? I wanna meet him.”

“He’s running late, he said he’d be here at 11ish.”

“Okay…” I drank my rum and coke and looked around the club, trying to see if I spotted Hope. She was supposed to meet us and as far as I could tell she wasn’t here yet.

“Don’t embarrass me? Please?”

“I already told you I’d be good. I promise.” I beamed at Ricky as he rolled his eyes at me.

“Whatever, I’m going to the bathroom.” Ricky got off his stool and headed into the crowd toward the bathroom.

I sighed and sipped some more of my drink. The music was blasting through the bar and a few skanky girls were dancing, hoping to get a guy to buy them some drinks.

That was pathetic.

I mean ew, I’d buy myself a drink before dancing around like a trained dog for some scary guy to notice me.

I noticed Hope walking over to me, wearing a red poncho and a pair of red short shorts. She walked over to me and sat down with a smile on her face.

“Guess who’s coming tonight?”

“Who?” I asked, smiling a little bit.

Hope had been having a lot of trouble getting over Tommy. She didn’t say it, but I could tell that when she was spacing off she was thinking about him. She tended to do that a lot.

I guess it’s hard to get over love, even when it’s for the best.

“Andrew!”

“My brother Andrew?!”

“Yeah!”

What?! I had no idea that Andy liked Hope. I mean yeah Hope liked Andy that was obvious but oh my God. I mean it was cute and all but I couldn’t believe it.

But it would be kinda cool to have Hope as my sister in law.

“Wow… are you guys gonna hook up?”

“Maybe!” She giggled and ran her hand through her hair. “Do I look alright?”

“Yes!” I smiled, feeling kind of awkward at the fact that I was the only single one.

Ugh! I hated when that happened. I hated feeling like the third wheel. I just forced a smile and hoped for the best. I probably could find a normal guy to hang with… right?

Eh. I doubted that but I could still have fun anyway.

“BOO!” Ricky said and jumped on me. I almost screamed and glared at him.

“I hate when you do that!”

“Psh... whatever. You love it.”

“Ricky, get a life.” I grabbed him and licked his cheek, making him freak out.

“EWW! Natalia that’s gross!” He wiped at his cheek while Hope and I giggled at him. He was so adorable sometimes, I absolutely loved it.

“Oh stop it.” I kissed him on the cheek and smiled at him. I know what you’re thinking, I’m flirting with him. No, that’s just the way me and Ricky are. We just like to mess around with each other.

I can’t lie, I had a crush on him when I was younger, but it wasn’t meant to be. We’re more like brother and sister then anything. We even plan on moving next door to each other when we’re both settled down.

“Ugh, now I smell like spit. I can’t stand you Natalia.”

“Oh my God!” Hope squealed suddenly, looking toward the door. I turned to see who it was and smirked when I saw Andrew walking in.

“What’s up Andy?” I said with a smile as my brother placed a small kiss on Hope’s cheek, then mine, and shook hands with Ricky.

“Nothing, I haven’t seen you in forever, brat.”

“I know. You’re too busy for me.”

“Whatever.” He rolled his eyes and laughed a little. Andy sat down next to Hope, the two of them started to make small talk.

Ricky and I decided to leave them alone so we headed to the other side of the bar where we just talked about a bunch of things and drank. We weren’t getting crazy drunk because that’s just stupid.

I mean its okay to do that sometimes, but fuck that, I had to drive home. I sure as hell didn’t want to go home with some scary man either.

Speaking of scary men, I saw my employer, Joey walking around the bar. I tried to hide from him but he spotted me and headed over to us. I clung to Ricky as Joey stepped right next to us.

“Hi Natalia…” Joey licked his lips at me and I could feel Ricky start to shake with laughter. I elbowed him in the stomach and forced a smile at Joey.

“Hi Mr. Fatone. You remember, my boyfriend, Ricky right?”

Ricky immediately got the hint and stuck his hand out to Joey.

“Yeah, I remember you.” Joey sneered and unhappily shook his hand. “I just wanted to tell you that I need you and Hope to help train this new girl next week.”

“Okay cool.” I smiled and placed a kiss on Ricky’s cheek and looked back at Joey. Joey smiled at the both of us but I could tell he was annoyed. He started to walk away and I hugged Ricky tightly.

“So how much is that you owe me now? I mean I’ve got claims on your kidney but I think I deserve a lung or something.”

“Quiet, because I do a lot for you too.” I said, sticking my tongue out at him and laughing.

“Keep telling yourself that, Nat.”

I rolled my eyes and sipped my drink, looking around the club for someone to make fun of. That was when I spotted this very good-looking brown haired guy come into the club.

I couldn’t stop looking at him. God! He was gorgeous; he even had these blue eyes that reminded me of Justin’s… GOD! Okay. Will not think of him again.

 The man smiled at me and started walking over. My heart started beating like crazy, I couldn’t believe it. Hey, maybe my luck wouldn’t be so bad.

“Hey, Teddy Bear…” The man said as he reached Ricky and I.

“Hey!” Ricky got up and hugged him tightly and my mouth dropped. Ricky placed a small peck on the guy’s lips and I pouted. Ricky ALWAYS got the hot guys. “Natalia, this is Louis, Louis this is Natalia.”

“Hi nice to meet you.” I smiled and shook the gorgeous man’s hand. Breathe Natalia, breathe!

“You too.” Louis smiled warmly at me.

Ugh, so not much happened after, the three of us talked and stuff and I definitely approved of Louis. He was really sweet and seemed to really like Ricky. They looked adorable together too.

Ricky and I staggered out of the bar at like 2am while Hope was still busy making out with my brother. The night wasn’t crazy cool, but the shit was about to hit the fan.

Chapter 15

“I FOUND THEM!!” A short, older man yelled as he ran into what once was Tommy Ryan’s office. Joseph Ryan was sitting at the desk with Justin, Tommy and JC; they were all discussing a drug delivery and who exactly was going to go and take care of it.

“Found who?” Tommy looked at the man strangely. “And who the fuck are you?”

“Tommy, this is Chris Kirkpatrick, he’s a Private Investigator that I hired.”

“Why would you hire a Private Investigator?” Justin asked and stood up straight, staring at the disheveled man before him.

“I hired him to find Esperanza Ciro and Natalia Fuentes. It’s about time you finally pinpointed them, Mr. Kirkpatrick.”

“I’m sorry, Sir.” Chris murmured and began searching through his bag, where he pulled out a bunch of pictures. Chris handed them to Justin who was the closest to him.

Justin looked through the pictures and smiled softly. The first were just candid pictures of Natalia and Hope, shopping, laughing and hanging out in some bar.

He couldn’t believe how long it’d been since he last saw her. It felt like yesterday since that faithful day that he had finally slept with her. Justin couldn’t believe how much he loved her; it was in the month he knew her that he had fell for her.

Justin flipped through the pictures until he came across one of Natalia and a guy. They were all over each other, hugging and laughing. Jealously began to build in his stomach as he looked over at Chris.

“Who is this?” He demanded, his hand clenching the picture.

“I believe it’s her boyfriend…they live together, along with Hope.” Chris said and Justin just clenched his fist with his anger boiling up.

How could she do that? How could she just move on and forget about him?! Justin couldn’t fathom how she could be such a cold-hearted bitch. The mobster flipped through the pictures, coming across a close up of his beloved Natalia. He studied the picture for a moment, running his fingertips across her face.

Justin had never seen her look so happy. She had this glow to her and she almost looked celestial. She was his angel and he knew he needed to get her back. He was happy at the fact that she still wore his necklace. It meant there was still hope; she still remembered him and she had to still love him.

Tommy stayed quiet, studying the pictures from behind Justin. There was Hope, the woman who had stolen his heart and run away with it.

If she only knew how sorry he was, and how much he would love to take away all the pain he caused her. He loved her and didn’t mean to act so cruel towards her.

He kicked himself for letting her go, but that wouldn’t happen again.

“It seems they both have been seeing other people… I spotted Hope and Natalia at a bar a few nights ago and I photographed Hope kissing what appears to be Natalia’s brother, Andrew.” Chris said and handed Tommy the pictures of Hope and Andrew’s intense make out session.

Tommy blinked a few times upon looking at the pictures. His heart had just been tore in half within a mere millisecond.

How could she kiss someone else? They were engaged!! They were going to be married!

Tears began to form in his brown eyes but he quickly wiped them away. He was a broken man.

“Well it seems that we need to take both of these men out. I’m just sorry that Justin wasn’t able to kill that bastard Andrew when he had the chance. That little bastard is starting to retaliate.”

“Retaliate?” JC questioned and Joseph rolled his eyes.

“Yes, it seems that Eduardo Diaz and his nephew Andrew Fuentes have decided to try and take us down. They’ve joined forces with the Lopez family, and since the incident with the fixed shipment, we aren’t on good terms with the Lopez family.”

“The Lopez family? Please…they’re nothing… the Ryan Empire stretches from the Americas to Europe. We can take them down easily.” Justin stated confidently, with JC agreeing with him.

“Don’t be fooled by the Lopez’s. They may look small, but they are quite powerful. We need to be cunning and calculative.” Joseph said and took the pictures from his son’s hands.

Tommy had been busy staring at the pictures of Hope that he hadn’t even bothered to listen to his father. He was too distraught.

“Cute girls… I don’t see what the big deal is about them though. You could find a million others just like them.”

“That’s where you’re wrong, father.” Tommy glared at his father; the pain was evident in every aspect of his being. “Hope is not like any other girl. She’s beautiful inside and out… she’s not like the many whores that you married!”

Joseph sat shocked as Tommy stormed out of the room. Justin and JC looked at each other while Chris merely stared down in fear.

“Pack your bags… bright and early tomorrow, we’re heading to New York City.”

**

It was about 11 on a Sunday afternoon and Joey had me come in to the bar to clean up this huge mess. There had been this big blow out the night before and the bar was a disaster. There was puke all over the walls of the bathroom and drinks spilled everywhere.

 Hope had bailed on me so I was stuck there cleaning it all up. I mean sure I was getting paid overtime but I think Joey was enjoying watching me clean up the mess. It was like he was saying; you won’t go out with me, so fuck you.

 I scrubbed the top of the bar with my trusty Windex All Purpose cleaner. It was disgusting how gross some people could be. There was gum and God knows what else all over the bar top.

 Thankfully, Joey let me play music. I had my trusty Queen of the Damned soundtrack playing, my favorite song off the soundtrack, “Slept So Long” by Jay Gordon filled the room and I continued to work, singing along to the music.

 “Walking, waiting, alone without a care, hoping, and hating the things that I can’t bear.” I roughly scrubbed at the bar with a brillo pad and ruined the hot pink manicure I had just gotten the day before. “Did you think its cool, to walk right up, to take my life and fuck it up! Well did you? I HATE YOU!”

 Yeah, I really can’t sing for shit but I like to pretend I can. Anyway, I was really embarrassed when I looked up and saw some men standing in the doorway of the bar.

 I adjusted my black shorts in which my ass hung out of and called for Joey. Hell, I figured this was a good time for my lunch break so I grabbed my cd out of the cd player just as the song finished.

 “Mr. Fatone, I’m taking my break now. I’ll be back soon.” I headed out the door to my car without another word.

 It was weird, because it felt like those men in the bar were staring at me. I mean I barely looked at them, but you know when you can feel someone staring at you? Yeah I got that.

 I had been getting that feeling a lot and it was creepy. It was like everywhere I went someone was watching me.

 But anyway, I got into my car, that feeling still present, and sped away, just wanting to get away as fast as I could. I decided to go harass Ricky at work, plus the bastard ate for free.

**

 Justin, Joseph and JC walked into the bar to the sound of “Slept So Long.” Justin stopped in his tracks as he saw his angel reduced to do manual labor in some dingy bar.

 He heard her voice for the first time in months as she sang along to the song and his heart jumped. God, she was stunning. Everything about her was beautiful. The way her body moved, the way her eyes sparkled, the way her perfect lips pouted as she sang. Natalia even had an innocence about her that drove him crazy.

Justin just wanted to take care of her.

But when she finally noticed them standing there, she looked right through him. Of course Justin knew this wasn’t the right time to talk to her, but he was still hurt.

 He heard her stop and call her employer and not once looked at them again. She just walked out of the bar and headed on her break, brushing past him and driving his senses crazy.

 The auburn haired man turned and watched her walk out, mainly staring at her ass that hung out of her tiny shorts. He couldn’t help but to think of the many things he wanted to do to his love.

 It had been so long since he was with a woman. After she left he tried to move on and slept with anyone he could, but it wasn’t the same. It was just sex with all those women. With Natalia, it was different, she gave him this feeling in his stomach and he knew he couldn’t let her go.

 Justin looked back at the owner of the bar; he was dressed in a blue superman shirt and a pair of jeans. He looked far from professional.

 “She’s gorgeous isn’t she?” The owner said and licked his lips as Natalia disappeared from sight. “I’ve been dying to fuck her.”

 “Watch your mouth.” Justin growled at the man. He was ready to lunge at him but JC made sure to keep his hand on his shoulder.

 “Whatever… My name is Joey Fatone… How can I help you gentlemen?”

 “My name is Joseph Ryan… I have a very easy business proposition for you, Mr. Fatone.”

 “Really?” Joey crossed his arms and sat on his bar stool. “You have my attention… have a seat.”

 Joseph sat next to Joey with a smile creeping across his face. JC and Justin just leaned against the bar and watched.

 “I need to know everything you know about Esperanza Ciro and Natalia Fuentes.” Joseph pulled out a wad of 100-dollar bills from his pocket, and showed them to Joey.

 “Excuse me?” Joey raised an eyebrow at the peculiar Irish man before him.

 “All of this will be yours if you can answer a few simple questions.”

 “Alright…”

 “Where do they live?”

 “Uhm… on 7th avenue and like Ford Street. But why do you need to know where they live?” 

 “We’re old friends and we want to surprise them.” JC answered quickly. “But listen, we’re asking the questions here and you’re getting the money, so just shut up.”

 Joey just nodded, he was obviously worried about these men in suits who were asking questions about his two best waitresses, but he figured they were FBI. Could Hope and Natalia be into crime? Maybe prostitution… Ohhh… he liked that prospect.

 “So tell me about the boy Natalia’s dating?” Justin asked, his hand tightly clutching the side of the bar.

 “Who Ricky? I think he’s flaming but I saw them all over each other the other night.”

 “Ricky What?” Justin’s eyes were practically popping out of his head.

 “Ricky Seaver… I think. Yeah. He works for Tommy Hilfiger.” Joey nodded and took a sip of some water. “I think Hope is seeing Natalia’s brother. It’s nothing serious as of yet. God I feel like a gossip queen.”

 “Don’t. You just helped us very much, Mr. Fatone. Thank you for your time.” Joseph placed the wad of hundreds down on the counter and looked at Justin and JC. “Come on boys, we have a lot of work to do and we need to find Tommy.”

 The three men walked out of the bar, only God knew what they were planning next.

Chapter 16

 Early the next morning, Ricky decided he was going to treat us to breakfast. The bastard forced Hope and I to get up. I refused to get dressed so I walked out of the house in my blue care bears pajama pants and blue tank top.

 Ricky had to get dressed and look perfect, while Hope just settled for a pair of jeans and a green Kermit the Frog shirt.

 We headed out of our apartment and down the street to Ricky’s black Ford Escape.

 “Ricky… I don’t wanna walk… carry me.” I pouted as he rolled his eyes at me.

 “God you’re annoying.”

 “Ricky, just carry her so she shuts up!” Hope said with a small laugh. I stuck my middle finger up at her as Ricky knelt down to my height and I jumped on his back.

 “Thank you!” I kissed his cheek and giggled. “Now… RUN!”

 Ricky ran down the block as I clung to him, giggling. Hope ran after us laughing at how stupid we were. None of it really mattered though. Ricky and I always had fun no matter what we did.

 Finally, he dropped me onto the floor and I fell on my ass, laughing.

 “You ass!” I stated, letting out a huge snort.

 “I’m sorry, you got heavy!”

 “EW!” I climbed up to my feet and glared at him. “Well you’re… you’re… ugly!”

 “WHATEVER! You didn’t think that in freshmen year.” Ricky beamed at me and I covered my face with my hands.

 “What happened freshmen year?!” Hope asked, pushing a strand of her dark hair away from her face.

 “She was so in love with me, she told like everyone about it.” Ricky cackled and I hid my face in my hands. “She even wrote me a love letter.”

 “Fuck you! I was 14!” I was so embarrassed, especially since I was such a dork when I was younger.

 “Aww that’s adorable.” Hope was laughing at me. Grr! I shot her a look and she continued laughing. “Sorry! It’s funny though!”

 “No it’s not! Ricky you so need to burn that letter… along with the prom pictures.”

 “Nat, I’m keeping those for blackmail. You’re bound to get something bad on me eventually, and I need it to blackmail you back…”

 “You scare me…” I shook my head at him and laughed.

 The three of us got in the car and headed to IHOP for breakfast. I still felt like I was being watched though. It was like at every moment, even when I was sleeping there was someone breathing down my neck and watching me.

 I told Ricky and Hope about it, Ricky laughed at me but Hope freaked out a little. She wondered if it was Tommy and Justin.

 I highly doubted that. I mean Tio Eduardo paid them, they had no reason to come looking for me. I didn’t tell the cops anything; I just went back to my life. I mean it was hard to go back to the way things were. I wasn’t able to adjust again, that’s kinda why I moved out.

 Things had become too crazy, and I needed my space now. I trusted my family, but to an extent I didn’t. I mean if I didn’t know my Uncle was doing dealings with the mob, God knows what else I didn’t know.

**

 Beautiful, that’s the only way Justin could describe his angel. Even at the wee hours of the morning she was beautiful. He sat in his blue Mitsubishi Spyder and watched Natalia, Hope and that bastard Ricky walk down the street.

 His heart ached in his chest as he saw Natalia and Ricky hug and flirt. It disgusted him. She was his girl. Justin would be damned if he let some pretty boy win her over.

 Watching the three get into Ricky’s car, Justin picked up his cell phone and quickly dialed Tommy’s hotel room number.

 “Hello?” Tommy answered groggily. By the sound of his voice you could hear that he had been crying.

 The once great Tommy Ryan had been reduced to a sniveling baby. All Tommy did was cry about his lost love. It was pitiful. But Justin knew that sooner or later, with the help of Joseph, the both of them would come running back.

 “Tommy, get your ass dressed now.”

 “I’m not going anywhere, Justin. So just stop it and let me sleep.”

 “Listen you fucker, I just overheard them saying their going to breakfast. Andrew is no where in sight…”

 “I don’t give a fuck man… it’s over. I don’t know why the hell I even came to New York. She doesn’t love me anymore.” Tommy began to sob. He was a broken man and Justin felt sorry for his friend, but he needed to shake the sense into him.

 “Man you need to get over this. You have to try and talk to her. You’ll never know what could have happened until you do.”

 “I don’t know…” Tommy sighed. “I just need some time to get over it.”

 “Don’t take too long man…” Justin quickly flipped his cell phone shut and followed Ricky’s car to a tiny IHOP.

 He watched them get out of the car through his tinted windows and glared when Ricky’s arm made its way around his love’s shoulder.

 Justin waited a few minutes before finally walking into the IHOP and getting a table where he could see and hear them perfectly. He brought a newspaper up a little lower than his eyes, pretending to read some article about John Kerry. Stupid Democrats.

  “So, Hope, when are you going out with my brother again?” Natalia winked at Hope and giggled.

 “Tomorrow actually. He’s gonna come by the bar and after work we’re gonna go out to dinner.”

 “Cuuute!” Ricky grinned and sipped some of his coffee. Justin wished he could have slipped some rat poison in it. That would take care of the bastard.

 “I know! I’m so excited about it. Nat, can I borrow your red Armani dress?”

 “Of course, wear your black Manolo Blahniks with them.”

 “I was thinking about my red Jimmy Choos…”

 “Naa… black Manolos definitely. It would be too much red if you wore the Jimmy’s. You can use your black prada bag too. That would be cute.” Ricky agreed and Justin raised an eyebrow. He knew about shoes, and fashion?? Okay…

 “He’s right. That’s my boy!” Natalia hugged Ricky and grinned. The jealousy bubbled in Justin’s stomach.

 How could any man enjoy women’s fashion? How could he actually memorize it and discuss it? What a weird guy…could he be gay? No… that couldn’t be…

 “So Louis is busy so Nat, we’re boozing it up tomorrow.” Ricky smiled and Natalia giggled happily.

 “My favorite pastime! Woo!”

 So that was it. He was going to follow them tomorrow…and he would reveal himself to her then. In a day Natalia would know the truth. Justin was back and he was not going to her get away again.
 

Chapter 17

 “Nice bar you picked, Ricky.” I said sarcastically, as Ricky and I sat in this dank, little hole in the wall bar. It was sleazy, and there were a lot of “interesting” people walking around.

 Only Ricky would pick a place like that.
 
 “It’s not that bad. It’s pretty cool.”

 The bar was called Enzo’s. Some short Italian guy owned it and kept giving me free drinks. It was eerie, especially since he kept winking at me and tried to get me to give him my number.

 “Eh… I guess… except for Enzo.” I shuddered as the scary man blew me a kiss.

 Ricky of course, burst out laughing and I turned a deep scarlet. Just my luck, another loser to add to my belt. I swear, I think I had the worst luck with men. I got scary psycho mobsters and scary perverted men.

 WOO HOO FOR ME!

  “Oh come on, Nat, he’s sexy.” Ricky snickered and I slapped his arm hard.

 “Fuck you!”

 I sipped my disgusting drink that Enzo sent me and cringed. I passed it along to Ricky and he greedily downed it. That boy loved anything with alcohol.

 He could drink me under the table. It was crazy, because Ricky looks like this skinny little weak guy, but in reality he’s a strong motherfucker.

 “Oh please, you love me Nat. You know it.”

 I rolled my eyes and smirked at him and stuck my middle finger up at him. Ricky stuck his tongue out at me and laughed. What a dork.

 “Just a little though.”

 “You mean a lot!” Ricky laughed and I couldn’t help but to lay my head on his shoulder and sigh happily. Ricky and I could be doing nothing and always have a great time.

 I love the fact that he always brings out the best in me; he always makes me smile and keeps my spirits high. He’s always had faith in me too. I was so happy to have him in my life.

 “Come on let’s bail, this bar is lame.”

 Ricky and I headed out of the bar, leaving a two dollar tip for Enzo on the bar. He screamed after us, DOUBLE THANK YOU. We just laughed and kept walking. If we only knew our evening wasn’t going to continue on such a high note.

 We stepped out of the bar and instinctively, I grabbed onto Ricky to protect me from the perverted men outside of the bar. We headed down the street to his car, just giggling about stupidities.

 “Remember that bitch you were friends with in high school…? What was her name…?” Ricky scratched his head and I giggled.

 “Hollie…Yes. You hated her and you’d curse her out like all the time. That was when I had that huge crush on you!”

 I ignored the fact that there was someone following us. Thinking back on it, I was naïve, I should have pulled Ricky and ran. But I just acted like nothing was going on.

 “I’m sorry… but that girl was a stupid, ignorant bitch. I hated all your friends in high school. Except Kayla, she was cool.”

 “Whatever. You were just anti-social and hated everyone.”

 “Well that’s also true but your friends were also cunty bitches.” Ricky smirked and I just rolled my eyes. He always had to be right.

 “I guess that category includes you.”

 The footsteps behind us grew louder and I quickly grabbed Ricky’s arm tighter and placed a kiss on his cheek, just so that anyone that was coming would think he was my boyfriend.

 “I love you so much, Ricky.” I said to him, and by the way I pinched him, he knew the drill and knew he had to say it back.

 “I love you too Natalia.” He leaned in and hugged me tightly. Whoever was following us, just stopped and stared.

 Chills ran up and down my spine, and I quickly leaned in and whispered to Ricky what was going on. He looked up at the figure before us and glared.

 “Is there a problem dude?”

 “Yeah there is a fucking problem…” A familiar voice hissed.

 I squinted my eyes, trying to figure out who it was. It was a guy obviously, but I couldn’t quite place who it was.

 Ricky and I exchanged weary glances and then looked back at the person who stepped towards us.

 Justin.

 Oh my fucking God. Oh my God. FUCK!! It couldn’t be him. He couldn’t be back. This had to be a nightmare.

 I tried pinching my arm to wake myself up but it didn’t work. I just ended up with a bruise on my arm. Fucking great. Ricky looked at me and raised an eyebrow; he could tell how distraught I was. I just tensed up and slowly started to back up.

 “Justin…”

 “Yeah, Natalia, It’s me.” He shook his head at me in disgust. “So the whole time you were fucking me and kissing me, you had a boyfriend back home? You’re a whore.”

 Ricky clutched my hand; shocked to see the infamous Justin he had heard so much about before standing before him.

 “We didn’t start going out till…wait. I don’t have to fucking explain myself to you. GODDAMNIT!! JUST GET OUT OF MY LIFE!!” I screamed, my blood was boiling and I was ready to rip his throat out.

 “No can do, Nat. You made me love you and that’s forever.”

 “AND YOU SHOT MY BROTHER AND NEVER TOLD ME UNTIL AFTER YOU GOT ME IN BED!! I FUCKING DESPISE YOU!!” Ricky was clutching my hand tightly, trying to calm me down.

 “Listen, dude, I think you need to step off and leave Natalia alone. She doesn’t need this right now.”

 “Fuck you, you stupid prick. You may be her boyfriend now but I know she still loves me. I know she still wears my necklace because she can’t get me off her mind.” Justin’s words were so true, but I refused to let him know they were real.

 “Love you? LOVE YOU? YOU THINK I FUCKING LOVE YOU!?” I ripped the chain off my neck and flung it at him. “TAKE IT BACK IF YOU WANT!! JUST LEAVE ME ALONE!! I LOVE MY BOYFRIEND AND NOT YOU!! YOU WERE JUST THERE, A ONE NIGHTER!!”

 My words had definitely stung him. By the look on his face you could see how devastated he was. I refused to let that bother me though; I grabbed Ricky and gave him this big kiss on the lips.

 Yeah it was awkward for the both of us, but Ricky went along with it. Bless his heart.

 “RICKY?!” A male voice screamed. We quickly broke away and there stood Louis, in tears.

 “Louis… oh my God…” Ricky’s face paled and my mouth dropped down to the ground. Oh shit!!

 “I knew it. I KNEW YOU HAD SOMETHING GOING ON WITH HER!” Louis ran his hand through his hair and started to wipe his tears away. “I thought you loved me!”

 “Louis, let me explain, this is not what it looks like!”

 “THE HELL IT ISN’T! JUST STAY AWAY FROM ME, RICKY!!” Louis started to run away and Ricky quickly started to chase him.

 “NO!! LOUIS!! WAIT!! I DO LOVE YOU!!”

 The two of them disappeared down the street and I mentally cursed myself out. I knew I was only asking for trouble by making Ricky pretend to be my boyfriend.

 I turned and saw Justin staring at me in disgust. I ran my hand through my hair and looked away from him quickly.

 “You’re a little liar. Wow.” Justin started to laugh. “I knew he was gay!! I fucking had a feeling!”

 “So you’ve been spying on me? You’re a fucking psycho. Just stay the fuck away from me.” I stormed away from him, actually running in my Marc Jacob heels.

 “Natalia, come on don’t go. Let’s talk!”

 “FUCK YOU JUSTIN! I DON’T WANNA TALK TO YOU!!” I scurried down the street, knowing perfectly well that I was far from my apartment building. There was no way in hell I was going to make it home without him catching up to me.

 But running was better than being subdued.

 “NATALIA!! COME ON!!” He was following after me and was very close behind.

 My adrenaline was pumping and I couldn’t think of anything but getting the hell away from him. Memories I had desperately tried to block out of my mind were popping back in.

 I made it down two blocks when the heel of my Marc Jacobs shoe snapped and I fell to the ground. I quickly climbed to my feet and clutched my hand into a fight fist.

 “DAMN YOU TO HELL MARC JACOBS!!”

 “Are you alright?” He was right behind me. I closed my eyes for a moment, trying to figure out what to do. I quickly grabbed my broken shoe and chucked it at him.

 “LEAVE ME ALONE!!”

 I ran down the street, well, I actually limped down the street. Make that the dirty Manhattan Street with one shoe on. It was impossible to get very far, so Justin finally caught up to me and grabbed my arm.

 I swear to God I almost screamed. Why me? Why? Why couldn’t he just leave me alone?

 I’m a good girl. I’m not a bitch or a whore or anything like that. I’m good and I just want him to leave me alone. I don’t want a bad boy, I so don’t believe a word of that cliché, the good girl wants the bad boy. That’s fucking bullshit.

 “Natalia please… just talk to me. Give me 10 minutes.”

 I didn’t know what to say. Should I listen? I mean it wouldn’t make any difference if I ran. He’d still follow me. I knew I had to listen to him.

 “Fine… but only for 10 minutes.”

 I crossed my arms and followed him to some small-secluded café. I was hoping to God that this would be the end of a long, psychologically damaging experience, but when am I ever right?

Chapter 18

 I sat in this small Greek café across from Justin. I was trying my best not to look at him; I just played with my hot pink manicured nails. Justin was ordering himself a cappuccino; I didn’t want anything but to get the hell away from him.

 “Natalia…I’m sorry.”

 “Are you?” I said nonchalantly. I didn’t even bother to look at him. My nails were more interesting at that point.

 Justin angrily grabbed my hand, making me look up at him annoyed. I just huffed and pulled my hand away from his grip quickly.

 “Natalia, I’m serious. I never meant to hurt you or your brother… it ju-“

 “All I hear coming out of your mouth is bull shit. You’re wasting your breath.”

 “It’s not fucking bullshit. I love you so much and it kills me to see you in pain.” He said softly, he kept trying to meet my gaze but I purposely looked away from him.

 “You’ve pained me for the rest of my life, so why aren’t you dead?”

 He rolled his eyes, trying to brush off the hurt I caused him. Sure that was fucked up of me but I just wanted him off my back fast. I was counting the seconds till I was far away from him.

 “I didn’t hurt you intentionally… it’s just everything got crazy. I didn’t plan on falling in love with you and I didn’t plan on kidnapping you. Things just happen sometimes.” He stated and I just rolled my eyes.

 I wrapped my arms around myself, starting to block out what he was saying. I really didn’t care anyway. My mind was made up about him and nothing was going to change that. It was like his words were going in one ear and out the other.

 “Natalia please listen to me!”

 “Justin, you’ve said all of this before and it doesn’t matter. I’m not going to love you and I’m not going to be with you. So just back off.” I got up and slid on my broken shoe. I whipped out my cell phone and headed out of the café.

 “Can’t you at least forgive me?”

 “I can’t forgive you Justin. You changed my life and I’ll never be the same person I once was. I betrayed myself and my family… I don’t want to have anything to do with you.”
 
 “That’s bullshit!!” He cursed and grabbed a hold of my arm. “You love me Natalia. That’s why you wore the necklace I gave you, that’s why you haven’t run away already, that’s why you keep avoiding my eyes. You know that if you look at me you’ll realize how much you care about me and you’ll wanna be with me as much as I wanna be with you.”

 “Conceited much?!” I glared at Justin and pulled myself away from him. “Just leave me the fuck alone.” I headed toward the street and hailed a cab. I quickly threw myself in and commanded the driver to go.

 I knew this wasn’t the end of my encounters with Justin, but I was glad I got out when I did. He was getting to me, and I wouldn’t let myself be broken.

**

 I entered my apartment and saw my brother walking around in his boxers. I wanted to die.

 “ANDREW FUENTES!?! QUE EN CARAJO ESTAS HACIENDO?!”

 “Jesus Christ! Natalia!! What the hell are you doing here??” The look on my brother’s face was priceless.

 “I live here!! I thought that would be obvious to you… you know being that you’re the fucking future doctor!!”

 “I uh… Hope and I were…”

 “Okay…ew! Do not explain yourself please. Ew.” I covered my eyes and ran into my room. “When you’re finished I need to talk!!!”

 “We’re finished, what’s going on?” Hope walked into my room grinning. I was chucking my broken shoes into the wastebasket, unable to look at Hope. She fucked my brother!!

 “I ran into in old friend tonight.” I plopped back down on my bed and looked up at Hope and Andy who were standing in the doorway.

 “Okay… who?” My brother questioned.

 I chuckled to myself and rubbed my face lightly. All I could think was why me? Why? What did I do to deserve something like this? What could I have possibly done to have such bad karma to have mobsters stalking me?

 I’m a good girl damnit!!

 “It seems that the Ryan Crime Family is in town. You were right, Hope, they are after us.”

 “You’re kidding me right??” Hope lost all the color in her face. The girl looked like she was gonna pass out.

 I just weakly nodded at her while my brother just looked uber pissed. I told them about how Justin had stalked me that night and how I got poor Ricky into trouble with Louis. I told them how Justin had admitted to following me.

 My brother was fuming. This bullshit with the mob was supposed to be over.

 “I promise you girls, I’ll make them leave you alone.” Andrew kissed Hope’s hand and half smiled at me. “I won’t let either of you be hurt.”

 “I know you won’t… but Andrew, you have to be realistic. They’re everywhere. You’re not gonna be able to stop them.”

 “She’s right. They won’t stop till they get what they want, especially Tommy.” Hope was leaning against the wall, trying to control herself. I knew she was ready to break down.

 She was just starting to move on with her life and he had to come back. Her ex-fiancée, the man who she loved and hated wouldn’t let her start a new life. Hell, I was in the same boat as her, except she had found someone to love, while I was still alone.

 “Believe me… they won’t get you. Natalia, you know I always keep my promises. I will not let any of these sons of bitches hurt you guys.” My brother leaned down and kissed me on the cheek and then softly kissed Hope. “I need to bail, but call me if you need me.”

 With that cryptic note, my brother got dressed and headed out of the apartment, leaving Hope and I afraid and fearing the future.

**

 For the next few days, things were hell. Ricky, Hope and I just mopped around. I really didn’t want to leave the house at all, but when Wednesday rolled around, Hope and I knew we had to go to work and train the new waitress for Mr. Fatone. I covered myself up with a black bucket hat and my brand new pair of D&G sunglasses.

 When we reached the bar, a familiar looking woman was sitting on one of the stools talking to Joey. Hope and I looked back and forth at each other and moved closer.

 It was no other than Savannah, the woman JC was crazy over. My eyes widened and I began to shake in fear. They had probably set her up to this. They were probably here, watching us.

 Yeah, I was paranoid constantly. I was always looking over my shoulder and staring at everyone suspiciously.

 “What the fuck are you doing here? Did Justin put you up to this, you stupid cunt?!” I screamed at Savannah. She just stared at me wide eyed.

 “Excuse me?!”

 “Justin and Tommy put you up to this. You’re fucking spying on us! TELL THEM TO LEAVE US THE FUCK ALONE!!!” Hope grabbed my shoulder, trying to get me to calm down but it was impossible. “You’re stupid… you should get out of that goddamn relationship with JC while you have the chance.”

 “What the hell are you talking about?! YOU NEED HELP!” Savannah yelled back at me. She stood up and walked right up in my face.

 I could tell Joey loved this. Chick fight chick fight! Asshole.

 “Listen you psychotic bitch, I broke up with JC a long fucking time ago because he’s a fucking stalker. I moved to New York to move on with my life and to try and get into acting. Don’t you dare accuse me of anything.”

 “Bullshit. Come on Justin?! COME THE FUCK OUT!!! BE A MAN FOR ONCE AND LIVE UP TO SOMETHING!!” I was screaming so loud that I was shaking.

 “Natalia, I think she’s telling the truth…” Hope said and held onto my arm. I don’t know what came over me but I just broke down crying. I knew I probably looked insane to everyone but it didn’t even matter to me.

 I hated feeling this way, so defenseless and weak. It’s like I had been broke so much that there was no way to repair me.

 “Is she alright?” Savannah asked, with her southern accent coming through strong.

 “Not really but don’t worry…”

 “It’s JC and those people? I knew they were into bad shit. I fucking knew it.”

 “Yeah… you’re right… and when you got out you were really fucking lucky. But be careful they don’t come after you. Tommy Ryan always gets what he wants, and if that means women to keep his best friends happy then so be it.” Hope was staring down as she said all of this.

I had stopped crying but I still had the hiccup effect of the long cry. I just wanted to crawl up and die.

“Come after me…they can’t find me though… right… it’s impossible.”

“Bullshit it’s impossible. You’re dealing with the mob, Savannah.” I stated, wiping my eyes and taking in a deep breath of air. I had to calm myself down.

“The mob…you’re kidding… right?”

“I wish she was.” Esperanza said and sadly looked at Savannah. She was horrified. Thankfully, Joey hadn’t heard any of this, he had disappeared to God knows where.

“How bout this… there’s safety in numbers… Savannah, why don’t you stay with us for a while until we figure out how to get these assholes off our backs.” I stated and the two of them nodded.

“Sounds good. I’m staying in a skanky motel anyway, so this will be better. Thank you guys.”

“No problem... sorry for being a bitch before, but I’m paranoid.”

“Don’t even worry about it. I understand. Let’s just bail and y’all can tell me everything that’s been happening, because I have a feeling that you’re right.”

**

“Yes this is Joey Fatone speaking…” Joey said into the phone.

“Mr. Fatone, I understand that you have a new waitress working…” A voice boomed into the phone.

“Savannah Carmichael… yes.”

“Do you happen to know where she’s staying?”

“Actually I think she may be staying with two other waitresses here…”

“That’s all I needed to know… thank you for your time.” JC hung up the phone and turned in his office chair and stared out the window. The woman who had constantly denied him was here. What a coincidence that he’d find her now. He was going to wait a while to go after her, until he was sure that Natalia and Hope were back, but he’d be able to kill two birds with one stone.

He’d get the woman of his dreams and maybe a higher position in the Ryan crime family. Oh the possibilities. All he had to do was win back Hope for Tommy. Not too hard… right?

Chapter 19

Yeah, it was beyond boring being cooped up in the apartment. Ricky was barely talking to anyone; he just sat in his room watching Married With Children episodes and repeatedly called Louis. Louis was ignoring him, I felt terrible because it was my fault.

But Hope, Savannah and I just sat on the couch talking. Hope and I had actually become close with Savannah. She was crazy just like us and it was good to have someone who knew what the constant fear and paranoia was like. We could relate to her.

“I’m bored.” I stated to the two girls and pouted. “I hate sitting in this damn apartment all the time.”

“I know. I thought New York was supposed to be fun and crazy.” Savannah said and sighed. She put her head in her hands and Hope grinned at the both of us.

“Why don’t we go and make our own fun then?”

“And how exactly are we gonna go and do that? Remember we’re supposed to stay here just like Andrew said.” I rolled my eyes at my statement. My brother could be a real asshole sometimes.

“He’s just trying to protect us. Plus he doesn’t have to know. We can just sneak out for a bit…” Hope said and crossed her legs.

“Ugh… this sounds like a bad horror movie. We’re gonna go out and come face to face with Justin and all those scary people. I think I’ll pass.” I leaned my head back on the couch and the two of them glared at me.

“Natalia!! Come on!! It’ll be fun and we can wear disguises. It’ll be like Halloween!” Hope grinned and I raised an eyebrow.

“Costumes? You’re joking right?”

“It’ll be fun! Come on Natalia. We won’t stay out too long. Don’t be boring.” Savannah pouted and I sighed.

“You guys haven’t been stalked like I have. I’m just really scared of these people.”

“I know exactly how you feel Nat, I know first hand what Tommy is capable of. But I also realize that I can’t let fear rule my life.” Hope responded, and I knew she was right. I couldn’t be scared, I just had to live my life normally.

“Fine. I’m wearing a blonde wig though.” I laughed and hopped off the couch, and ran to the closet where Ricky and I had all these Halloween costumes stored.

I grabbed a shoulder-length blonde wig and this sparklely silver dress that I had worn one Halloween when I was a fairy. It had a bunch of glitter and rhinestones on it. It was crazy but soo cute and really short and showed off a lot of clevage. I axed the wings and just put on a pair of clear Cinderella looking shoes.

Savannah wore a short black wig, and these hooker clothes. I swear, this girl was like the living embodiment of innocence. It was a black pleather skirt, a pair of knee boots and a pink halter top that left little to the imagination.

Hope put on this copper colored wig that was styled with two pigtails. The color actually didn’t look half bad on her, but I did like her natural color more. Anyway she put on this hoochie looking farm girl dress. She definitely took the roll of Savannah.

“Hey Y’all!” Hope stated, giggling a little. She had put on this fake southern accent and winked at us. I died laughing.

“Hi!” I said in this high squeaky voice. I was purposely being sickingly sweet to match the tone of my costume.

Savannah stalked into the room wearing this red lipstick. She looked at me and Hope up and down and laughed.

“So lets get straight to the point. I charge 100 an hour but a 1000 a night. Are you guys interested?”

My mouth dropped and I just immediately burst out laughing. This girl in front of me was like a totally different person. It was crazy.

“Na its okay.” I winked at her and laughed. “Come on lets get the fuck out of here.”

**

We headed out to eat to a diner. We sure as hell weren’t going to go to a nice place dressed as weird as we were. It was funny though because we got a lot of looks from people as we passed by.

It’s not like we even gave a fuck what people thought. We were just having fun and that was all that mattered.

The three of us sat in the booth of the diner. I flipped through the songs in the jukebox, hoping to find something that would make us smile.

“Look for “I want your sex”!” Savannah exclaimed, I laughed a little bit, but settled on “Pour Some Sugar On Me” by Def Lepard.

“POUR SOME SUGAR ON ME!!!” Hope screamed/sang. I started laughing so hard that I snorted.

“Good one.” Savannah giggled, I stuck my tongue out at her and sipped some of my coke.

“I know. I always pick the good songs. I’m good at everything I do.”

“Yeah okay.” Hope rolled her eyes and I threw a sugar packet at her.

“Uh… ew!”

We continued giggling and such, until I finally got up and walked to the bathroom. I applied some more pink gloss to my lips and almost laughed at my reflection. I didn’t look half back as a blonde.

“Oh my God! You’re like the cutest thing in the world!” A voice shrieked from behind me. I turned around and saw this whore-looking woman standing in the doorway of the bathroom, staring at me.

“Uh… do I know you?”

“No… but I’ve heard like so much about you!” The woman said. She was pretty, standing at about 5’6”, with light eyes and dark hair. She was kind of a plastic pretty though, she had so much makeup on, but I was sure that without the makeup she’d still be pretty.

“From who…?” This lady was really freaking me out.

“I’m Lani… Lani Moira.” She stuck her hand out and I shook it.

“Yeah…I’m Natalia Fuentes…”

“I know who you are. I’ve heard so much about you from the guys. You’re quite a legend to them…”

“Can I ask who exactly the guys are?”

The woman smacked her head and laughed. She was a little ditzy but she seemed really nice. I decided to be nice and not a bitch to her. Plus, she seemed more nice than evil.

Sometimes you can just tell the way a person is straight out. She seemed really sweet, and genuine.

“From Justin. I’m Joseph Ryan’s fiancé, Tommy’s father.” She held out her hand, showing the huge rock on her hand.

My heart sank in my chest. He was here. He had found us. Oh my fucking God.

“Oh… really?”

“Yeah, you know I saw pictures of you before. That blonde color really looks great on you. That dress is adorable too…”

“Thank you…” I was just about shaking and ready to have a mental breakdown.  “Make sure you tell everyone I said hi.”

I headed toward the window, quickly opening it. I looked down and saw I was pretty much clear to run.

“Wait where are you going?” Lani asked, and scratched her head.

“Far away, and I suggest you do the same. The Ryan’s are nothing but trouble.” I climbed out the window after saying those words and ran back to the front of the restaurant. “We’re leaving NOW!”

“What the hell is going on?” Hope raised an eyebrow.

“Just listen to me… we have to fucking leave… now.”

“Why? Our food didn’t even get here yet.” Savannah asked and cocked her head to the side.

“Just fucking listen to me.” I grabbed Hope and pulled her up from the booth. Savannah just followed from behind. I threw money down on the table and jetted outside to the car.

I knew someone was following us. I just knew it in my gut. I unlocked the car and climbed into the passengers seat. My heart was beating at a crazy rate. I started the car and “99 problems” by Jay-Z exploded through the speakers.

I pulled out of the parking lot and sped back to the building. I saw a blue Mitsubishi Spyder following us, a few cars behind. I automatically knew who it was and quickly tried to move faster.

“They were in the fucking diner. Justin and all of them were fucking there.” I was shaking and barely able to think straight. This was impossible. Why? WHY FUCKING WHY!?

“No…Natalia… you have to be wrong…” Hope had started to tear up, I felt bad to be a bitch but I was so scared. I just started to freak out.

“I’M NOT FUCKING WRONG!! I JUST FUCKING RAN INTO JOSEPH RYAN’S FIANCE!!! WE’RE ALSO BEING FOLLOWED AT THIS FUCKING MOMENT!!”

Hope just got quiet. I sped to the building and left Hope and Savannah in the front. I stupidly parked in the back, thinking it would throw anyone off. I was wrong.

I headed to the back entrance to the building when someone grabbed my shoulder. Not even bothering to look, I back kicked whoever it was in the balls and looked for the mace in my bag.

“OW!! NATALIA!!” It was Andrew. Oh thank fucking God.

I turned around and saw my brother holding himself. I bit my lip and looked at him sympathetically.

“Are you alright? I’m so so so sorry. I was being followed.”

“Don’t worry about it… just oww… come on lets go upstairs and we’ll talk…” Andrew said and I helped him upstairs to the apartment. I knew I was in for it, but I decided not to sweat it. I was alright now and that was all that mattered.

Chapter 20

Andy limped upstairs to the apartment, while I followed trying not to laugh too hard. I mean sure everything was insane, but it was really hysterical, even under the circumstances.

I sat down on the couch while Andy got an icepack to put on his crotch. I glanced at Savannah who just giggled silently. Hope was too busy “nursing” my brother’s “wound”.

“Now would someone tell me what exactly you were doing out of the apartment… alone… dressed like whores.” My brother said. I just bit at my lip, trying not to get us into anymore trouble.

“We weren’t trying to be whores. It was just disguises…” Savannah happily responded.

“Well apparently you’re disguises didn’t work because you got followed. You know, Natalia, I would have expected more from you.”

“Oh lighten up, Andy. We just wanted to go out and have a little fun. You can’t expect us to stay locked in this apartment forever.” I crossed my arms across my chest and defiantly stared at my brother. He was really ticked off.

“You’re telling me to lighten up? You got followed by those assholes. You’re so lucky that I decided to come see you guys. By the way there’s something wrong with your phone…”

“MY BAD!” Ricky yelled from the other room. Andrew just looked at me strangely.

“Romance troubles.” I merely responded and pulled the blonde wig off my head. “Listen, we’re fine, so no sweat, okay?”

“You guys aren’t getting it. What if they would have kidnapped you… again. You know there all quite capable of that. You have to think.”

“Carajo. I understand but you cannot expect a group of 19-23 year old girls to stay in a fucking apartment.” I got up to my feet and stared my brother down.

“She’s right, Andy. You can’t expect us to be prisoners.” Hope added and Andrew just sighed.

“I understand that, but I just want you guys to be safe.”

“And we will be.”

“Fine…I won’t worry so much if you guys just stick together and be more careful. This whole situation is going to be solved soon enough anyway. Just stay safe.”

“How is it getting solved?” I asked suspiciously. Andrew just shrugged.

“It’s not important so don’t worry. I need to bail anyway, give me a call if you need anything.” Andrew kissed Hope and then kissed my cheek and ran out the door.

There was definitely something weird going on with him. Something was definitely up.

**

Thursday nights at the bar were always hectic. It seemed that every bar in New York City was packed on Thursday nights. I was strutting my stuff in a short pleated black skirt and a white tank top. My hair fell down in soft waves.

I never really overdid it for work. Especially since I sure as hell didn’t want to date a guy that came to the bar. Usually, the guys were scary.

Anyway, I paraded around with a tray of drinks in hand. I made sure to purposely sway my hips to the sound of the terrible techno remix of “Adidas” by Korn. The swaying usually helped me to get a few extra dollars in tips. Every bit counted, especially since I have a very bad shopping obsession.

I placed the tray of beers down on the table of these jock guys and headed toward another table. I pasted on a fake smile and approached an older looking man who sat alone.

“Hi… I’m Natalia, you’re hostess for the evening, Can I get you anything?”

“Yes, would you start me off with a bottle of your finest champagne…” The man said, his Irish accent automatically made me think of Tommy and I shivered a little. “I have a few guests here and I’d like to celebrate.”

“Yes, Sir. It’ll be right out…” I half smiled at the man before me. He gave me the creeps to be honest.

I jetted to the bar and gave the order to the bartender, a short, chunky guy, who really didn’t talk much.

As the guy got the order ready, I headed over to Savannah who sat boredly on a barstool.

“I need a man.” I said with a sigh.

“Ditto.” She responded. I placed my head on her shoulder and exhaled deeply. “

It’s not fair. What’s wrong with us?”

“I don’t know. I guess it’s not our time to find love.” She stated sadly. “Life is unfair I guess.”

I pouted for a second and rested my chin on my hand. Why was it that all the men in my life that I had dated, except Justin, meant nothing to me. Why was it that they were all perfectly normal, but I had chosen to fall for Justin, the psychotic one who had shot my brother?

What was wrong with me?

“Orders up Nat!” The bartender called to me and I lazily got up. I grabbed the bottle of chilled champagne and glasses and headed toward the scary Irish guys table.

This time the table was filled with people. I placed the tray down in front of them and fake smiled.

“If there’s anything else I can get you jus-…”I stopped mid-sentence and stared at the people sitting in front of me. It was the same old Irish man, but added to him was Tommy Ryan, JC and Justin.

My mouth just about fell to the floor and I started to stutter like crazy. I backed up and headed back to the bar and grabbed my cell phone out.

“Andy? Where the hell are you?” I cursed into the receiver when my brother answered the phone. He was somewhere around the bar, most likely with Hope.

“I’m here, chill, what’s wrong?”

“There fucking here. Justin and Tommy and all of them. There fucking here!!!” I practically screamed into the phone.

“Just stay where you are okay? I’ll be right there.”

My brother showed up with Hope on his arm within a millisecond. Just as he arrived, Justin had begun to walk over to us as well. I grabbed onto my brother, while he called someone on the phone and demanded they come down to the bar.

“Natalia… you’re looking more beautiful than ever…” Justin said when he reached me. He grabbed my hand and kissed it. I cringed and quickly pulled it away. “Hope, you’re looking stunning as well. I think Tommy’s over there and I know he’d like to talk to you.”

“Oh does he?” Hope sneered and held on tighter to Andy. “I guess Tommy needs to realize that we don’t always get what we want.”

My brother snapped his flip phone shut and looked straight at Justin.

“So you’re the son of a bitch that shot me and kidnapped my sister?” Andy looked him up and down and scoffed. “You’re just a weak, trigger happy son of a bitch.”

“Dude… I’ve got nothing against you I just wanna talk to your sister…”

“Like hell I’m gonna let you talk to her. If you know better you’re going to get the fuck away from her, Hope and Savannah right now.”

“You need to chill the fuck out man. I just wanna talk to her.”

“AND YOU’RE NOT GOING TO FUCKING TALK TO HER SO BACK OFF! STOP FUCKING STALKING HER AND COMING AROUND, SHE DOESN’T WANNA BE NEAR YOU!!” Andrew screamed, coming up into Justin’s face. Justin cringed and then angrily shoved my brother back.

“Get outta my face you fucking pussy.”

I just stood there in shock, knowing that something bad was going to happen. I grabbed my brother’s arm and held him back; I knew he was ready to cause a scene.

“Who the fuck do you think you’re calling a pussy? You fucking asshole, the only way you can get a woman is by kidnapping her. You need help you sick fuck!!!”  Andrew was angry; I didn’t know how he was managing to hold himself together.

I thought Justin was ready to walk away, and just leave us alone, when Tommy Ryan walked behind him and put his hand on his shoulder.

“Is there something wrong, Justin?” He asked in his Irish accent. I looked over at Hope and saw that she was just about hyperventilating. She quickly clung to Andrew’s arm and refused to look up at Tommy. She just stared off, never meeting his gaze.

Poor Hope was doing her best to calm herself down. It really wasn’t working, Tommy could easily see how she was affected by him and he smiled. I guess he knew that she still cared about him.

“Yeah there is. I’m just trying to speak to Natalia and this fucker here is in the way.” Justin responded and crossed his arms over his chest.

The great Tommy Ryan was back. He smirked menacingly at Andrew, Hope and I. Chills ran down my spin as flashbacks from the Kidnapping flew back into my mind.

Chapter 21

The next thing I knew, I was sitting inside Tommy’s hummer limo with Hope, Tommy, and Justin. I looked down at my hands and nervously cracked my knuckles.

I mean what the hell was I supposed to do? Everything was just so fucking awkward. Justin sat next to me and I wearily ran my fingers through my hair.

“Champagne anyone?” Tommy said and closed the limo door. There was a bottle of champagne already chilling in the wet bar. I just shook my head no and crossed my legs.

Hope folded her arms and glared at Tommy.

“I’m not here to sip champagne, Thomas. Say whatever you have to say so I can hurry up and leave.” She hissed angrily at him. Tommy just ignored her and opened the bottle up.

“Hope, chill out. Tommy was your fiancé; the least you could do is give him a few minutes.” Justin replied for Tommy, who was busily filling four champagne glasses.

“Whatever.” My Hispanic friend crossed her arms and sat back in her seat. I just glanced at her; unsure of how exactly I should be feeling. If she was panicking I knew that I should be as well.

She seemed really cool though, other than the fact that she was infuriated. I decided to try and mellow out a little myself. I let out a deep breath and patted my messy hair, trying to stop it from frizzing out.

“It’s been a long time since we’ve all spoken. How are you doing?” Tommy stated, it was obvious he was aiming his question toward Hope.

“Great actually.” Hope immediately answered and took the glass of champagne from Tommy’s hand. Tommy just motioned for the driver to head back to his hotel.

I had the worst feeling in the pit of my stomach. I knew nothing good was going to come out of that night.

**

Hope and Tommy had walked out of the limo and down the street. I knew they were fighting and from what I could see, Hope had the advantage over Tommy.

I sighed and looked over at Justin who was sipping his champagne and staring at me. God he was so sexy… WAIT! What was I doing? Why did I have to be so damn attracted to him?

“What?” I said finally. I kept my cool but on the inside I was dying for him.

“Nothing…you just look like an angel.” He stated simply and seductively drank his champagne.

“Stop trying to get in my pants. It’s not gonna work.” I folded my arms over my chest and crossed my legs. “What do you want from me Justin? I’ve told you time and time again to leave me alone, but you never listen. What do you want?”

“I want you, Natalia.”

“I can’t help you with that. You’re a sick, sadistic killer.”

“If I’m so evil… why are you still here? Why aren’t you screaming for help?” Justin leaned over to me and breathed against my neck. “You want me… I can see it in your eyes…”

I closed my eyes for a second and with all the strength in my body I pushed him away. As much as I wanted him, I wasn’t going to let him have me. He shot my brother damnit!

“I’m still here because you said you wanted to talk. I didn’t know talking involved seducing. This isn’t gonna work Justin. So just leave me alone already.”

“Natalia will you just give it up already? This fucking front you have of not wanting me… I know you do… the whole fucking bar knows you do…” he reached over and ran his hand up my skirt and let his fingers glide over my panties. “I can feel how much you want me right now…”

“Justin stop…” I breathed out; his lips crashed down on mine and silenced me. Any part of me left that would have fought him off was gone. I wanted him and nothing was going to stop me from getting him.

In one quick motion, my panties were off and tossed across the limo. His fingers attacked my hole, and I continued to kiss him deeply, every so often I would let out a moan in his mouth.

I couldn’t believe that once again I was putting myself on the line and going to sleep with him. There was a tiny part of me that was screaming don’t do it. Don’t let yourself fall into his trap. Run while you can.

But the rest of me remembered the amazing sex Justin and I had last time. I could easily say that it was the best sex of my life. Even if it was for one last time, I had to have it again. I had to experience that feeling of pure pleasure.

We broke the kiss but his fingers continued to pump in and out of me. He knew me so well, all my hot spots and pressure points. Justin worked my body so good.

But before I could orgasm, he pulled his long fingers out of me and left me leaning on the seat panting.

“Justin please!!” I begged, unable to move an inch. I was like putty in his hands.

“Calm down girl. We have all night.” He smirked at me and leaned over and kissed my neck. “There’s no rush…I want you to strip for me.”

I looked at him oddly and shook my head.

“Sorry, I don’t “strip”.” I shook my head and pushed him off of me. I scooted across the limo and grabbed my panties. All the sense that was knocked out of me before came rushing back to my head.

Justin quickly grabbed them from my hand, opened the limo window and chucked them out.

“You’re not going to be needing those tonight.”

“I can’t believe you just did that!!!” I screeched. I shoved him away from me. “I DON’T WANT TO SLEEP WITH YOU!!!”

“Funny… a few minutes ago you were begging me to finger fuck you. I think you’ll change you’re mind again.” Justin was smirking at me and I wanted to slap him. Cocky bastard. He opened the window to the limo driver and began to speak to him. “Driver, take us to the closest beach.”

“Will do Mr. Timberlake.”

The huge limo began speeding off and I clung to my seat. Justin grabbed his cell phone and dialed Tommy to tell him where he’d gone. I decided to do the same thing and call my brother.

“Natalia, are you alright?!” Andrew exclaimed when he answered his cell phone.

“I’m fine…” I decided to be a tricky bitch and speak in Spanish so Justin couldn’t understand me. “I’m in the limo with him. He’s taking me to the beach.”

“Where’s Hope? Is she alright too?”

“I don’t know… she went somewhere with the other psycho. Try calling her. Right now Tommy is preoccupied I think.” I responded, continuing my Spanish.

“What beach is he taking you too?”

“I don’t know… he said the closest one…” I looked out the window to figure out where I was. “I don’t know what beach is around this neighborhood anyway. Try to come find me please.”

Suddenly Justin grabbed the phone from my hand and he began speaking in perfect Spanish to my brother. My mouth dropped.

“Your sister is fine and that’s all you need to know. I will get her home safely when we’re finished talking.” Justin snapped shut my cell phone and looked at me with a smirk. “You’re not the only one that can speak Spanish. Thank Hope for that one.”

“Fuck.” I cursed under my breath. He just laughed.

“That’ll come later. Don’t worry baby girl.” He rubbed my thigh lightly and turned back to the limo driver.  “Change of plans. Take us back to the hotel.”

“Yes Mr. Timberlake.”

The limo driver shut the window and I was alone with Justin again.

**

“Hope… don’t walk away.” Tommy Ryan said as he and Hope headed down the street.

“I’m sick and tired of these games Tommy. I’m tired of you being in my life. When I left you it was for a reason and I don’t want to go back to that life!”

“Esperanza… please… understand me. I know I messed up but I love you so much. I want to marry you and I will do anything for you.”

“No… not anything. You won’t give up you’re fucking life of crime.” She shook her head and laughed bitterly. “You’ll never change Tommy. All of you’re fake promises and apologies. You will always be a SELFISH BASTARD!”

Hope headed down the street, not even bothering to look back at him. Tommy was screaming after her. She refused to look back at him. Why couldn’t he realize that she just wanted to move on and forget about him?

When Tommy caught up to her, he grabbed her arm and turned her towards him. He kissed her, so deeply and so passionately that Hope was sure that she might pass out.

Of course she loved him, but that wasn’t enough to keep them together.

“Please… Esperanza Ciro… I love you and I want you to be my wife…” Tommy ran his strong hand down her face. Tears were falling down her face. She couldn’t do this.

“I can’t Tommy. It’s too late now…I’m in love with someone else.” She was lying of course. Tommy was her soul mate. But Hope had to let go, and she thought this was the only way to do it.

“Who is he?” His voice caught in his throat.

“Andrew Fuentes… we’ve been dating for a little while now… but I’m in love with him.”

“That’s fucking bullshit!!!” Tommy yelled and clenched his hand into a fist. “You fucking don’t wanna be with me because I’m dangerous… but he’s the same!”

“What are you talking about?!” Hope was annoyed now, especially since she had no clue what he was talking about. Tommy was always vague, but he didn’t even know Andrew.

“Andrew’s in tight with the mob.”

“No he isn’t.” She shook her head; she couldn’t believe that Tommy would sink so low as to lie about Andrew. He was in med school and going somewhere in life. He wouldn’t be involved in the mafia, especially after what happened with Natalia.

“He is. He’s in tight with the Lopez family. I fucking know this for a fact, Esperanza.”

“You’re a liar and you’re pathetic.” She shook her head and began to walk away, Tommy grabbed her arm and pulled her to him. Hope screeched and slapped him across the face. “GET OFF ME!!!”

Hope couldn’t believe what she did. She bitch slapped the great Tommy Ryan. He just held his face and stared at her, before letting go of her arm. His heart was broken as was hers.

Chapter 22

He was staring at me. I could feel it from the corner of my eye. I turned and stared right back at him.

"Isn't it fun to stare at people?" I said sarcastically.

"It is… especially when they're really beautiful…" He replied and massaged my inner thigh. I was getting wet and I knew he could feel it. I pushed his hand away and moved away from him.

"I hate you."

"No you don't." He pulled me onto his lap and ran his hands down my face. "Since the day we slept together I could tell you cared about me…"

"You make it seem like we had some great romance… we didn't…"

"But we can…that's the beauty of it. We can have something so special and meaningful…" Justin leaned in and kissed me softly. I couldn't help but to be drawn into him again. The kiss began to grow more heated and Justin's hands slipped up my thighs.

He had me again. I don't know how he managed to do it, but Justin could easily seduce me. I pulled away from the kiss for a moment and looked down at his crotch. The bulge in his pants was very visible. I stroked it with my fingertips and grinned as Justin closed his eyes.

"You little tease…"

"I'm the tease? You're the one that teased me before." I grinned and licked my lips. He opened one of his eyes and smirked.

"Eh… but that was different…"

"How was it different?"

"Because I was proving a point…" Justin responded. I unzipped his pants and his throbbing cock popped out.

"No you weren't… you enjoyed seeing me squirm…"

"That I did." He slid his middle finger into me and moved it in a circular motion. I whimpered softly and grabbed his penis, I rubbed the tip with the palm of my hand. This drove him crazy, he groaned and pulled his finger out of me.

"No more games. I want to be in you."

I pulled my skirt up completely and Justin grabbed my hips. He pushed me down onto his dick and my mouth opened. I wanted to say something but nothing came out, the pleasure was too intense.

He clutched my hips tightly and moved me up and down. It didn't take long for me to start moving on my own. Justin leaned his head back against the tinted windows of the limo and just watched me move. The look on his face was of pure bliss.

I lifted up my shirt and Justin grinned in response. He reached up and squeezed my breasts roughly. He flicked at my nipples and I let out a moan. Proud of his work, he pulled my shirt back down and kissed me softly.

Finally, he just grabbed my hips; unable to take the slow pace I was going at and just pulled me down on him hard. I cried out, feeling the orgasm build up inside me. I couldn't hold myself back any longer. I gripped onto his shoulders and squeezed my walls around him.

"Uhhh… God… Justin!" I came with a fury. My body was shaking and I thought I was going to pass out. He pulled me off him and laid me down on the seat next to him.

He tucked himself back in his pants. I watched him curiously, not understanding why he didn't continue. I mean he didn't cum, where was his satisfaction?

"Like I said before, my angel…" Justin finally spoke up; it was almost as if he read my thoughts. He smiled deviously at me. "We have all night."

The limo came to a grinding halt in front of the grand hotel. The limo door opened and Justin climbed out. I shakily climbed out but almost fell. Thankfully, Justin grabbed my weak body and held me up.

"You alright?"

"I don't know what happened…" I managed to get out. He just smiled and picked me up in his arms. Justin was cradling me like a baby. I loved being in his arms like this. I leaned up and kissed him softly. He just smiled at me and headed inside the hotel.

**

Hope and Natalia had left the bar in a hurry. Savannah didn't even get to see what happened. Now she was stuck with triple the work. Sure, she didn't mind. She'd get more money in tips.

Savannah ran a hand through her dark hair and headed to the bartender, asking him for two beers for one of the tables she was waiting.

She in fact despised beer. The smell of it, the taste of it, hell even the color of it. It reminded her of her ex-boyfriend, Jordan. He swore too much and was always drinking coronas.

She remembered seeing him for the last time like it was yesterday. He had gotten her pregnant, Savannah told him and he freaked out. He didn't want a child, he said, especially with a whore like her. Savannah cried her eyes out, and that's when it happened. In a drunken rage, he pushed her down the stairs and that was the end of her child.

Jordan had disappeared too. He called 911 and was never heard from again. Savannah was heartbroken, but at the same time she was happy that he was gone. She didn't need him.

The order came up and she brought the beers to the young couple and then headed back to the bar. She was ready to pass out for the night.

"Savannah?"

There was a familiar voice behind her. She didn't turn around but instead cleaned up a drink that someone spilled.

"That's my name."

The person walked in front of her. Savannah looked up and dropped the mop. It was JC.

"What are you…" She couldn't even finish her sentence, she was terrified. After everything she had witnessed and everything Hope and Natalia had told her, she was so frightened of him.

"I just wanted to say hello. I was in town with some friends and I decided to look you up."

"How did you know I was in New York?"

"Annie from Angels Diner told me you were moving out here." JC stuck his hands in his pockets and smiled. “I'm gonna be here for a while longer and I thought maybe one of these days we could get together…"

"Uhm…. I don't know JC…" Savannah was desperately trying to keep her cool. She flipped her head over and tied her hair up into a high ponytail.

"Come on… please Savannah…I mean we'll just go out to dinner… that's it."

"Alright…" She sighed and grabbed a napkin. She scribbled down her cell phone number on the paper and half smiled. "Give me a call." Savannah grabbed her tray of drinks and headed toward another table.

JC just leaned against the bar and watched her. She was so gorgeous. She had to be his.

**

When we reached the pent house floor, the elevators opened and I was greeted by the entire floor being his room. Goddamn! It was beautiful; there was a water fountain in the middle of the room. It was of a female angel; she was looking down at the water with a hint of sadness. It was absolutely breathtaking.

The motif of the room was like heaven. Everything had a peaceful glow to it.

"This is gorgeous J." I spoke up finally. I was still in his arms as he walked into the bedroom and laid me on his bed.

"I picked it out with you in mind. You are my angel." He sat in a large chair in the corner. "The angel fountain in the front made me pick this room. I thought the angel looked like you."

"I guess…" I blushed a little bit and sat up on the bed. "I feel better."

"Good… I'm sorry… maybe I was too rough towards the end…"

"Naw… I just haven't had sex in a long time… my body wasn't used to it." I confessed, he just smiled.

"And how many men have you slept with, Natalia?"

"Honestly? Two. You and my ex-boyfriend. What about you Mr. Player?" I teased, I knew he had slept with many women, it was obvious by his cocky nature and just the way he presented himself. He just hesitated for a moment.

"A lot."

"And what makes me so different?"

Justin smiled and stood up; he walked over to me and kissed my lips softly.

"You're pure and innocent. You're not after my money, and you don't want to hurt me. You see the true me, and you actually care about me. No one has ever felt that way before." He ran his hand down my cheek and I smiled.

But his damn cell phone had to ring and ruin the moment.

"Hold on, angel. I need to take this call." He flipped open his cell phone and began pacing around the room. "Yeah… I'm not working anymore tonight. It's late."

There was a pause and he seemed to be listening to what was happening on the other line. He closed his eyes and rubbed his temples.

"I can't help with that Tommy. Get JC to do it…Yes I understand that. No is no… I don't care how much you're paying me. Alright…" Justin walked out of the room and left me there alone.

I bit at my nails and listened to Justin arguing with Tommy on the phone. I smirked when I heard Justin tell Tommy that I was in his hotel room and not to bother him anymore. I heard the phone snap shut and then a number was dialed.

"Yeah… C. It's Justin. I need you to do me a huge favor. Yeah, Tommy needs you to go take someone down. Someone in the Lopez Family. Apparently they're trying to start a war. Tommy's willing to pay you 2 mil for the job. Give him a call alright? Later man."

During this time, I slipped off my clothes and climbed under Justin's thick blankets. I swear there had to be at least 10 on his bed.

He headed back into the room and smiled at me. I don't think he realized I was naked.

"Comfy?"

"Yep." I smiled innocently at him and pulled the blanket up under my chin. "Who called before?"

"It was Tommy. He wanted me to go to work." Justin leaned back in the chair he was sitting in and ran his hand through his hair.

"Oh… if you wanted to go I hope it wasn't me that stopped you…"

"Don't worry about it. The job was too messy and I'd much rather be with you." I grinned as he said that. He was so fucking adorable.

"Why are you so far away? Come cuddle with me…" I said, I made sure to be really sweet and innocent about it.

"I wasn't sure if you wanted me to…"

"Well, I do… so c'mere."

Justin got up and kicked off his shoes and socks. He pulled off his shirt and tossed the covers aside. He just stopped dead when he saw me lying there naked.

"Are you just gonna stand there and stare?" I smirked and licked my lips.

"Gimme a second, angel." Justin pulled his pants and boxers off, the whole time staring at me. He climbed into the bed with me and wrapped his strong arms around me.

I leaned up and kissed him urgently. I cupped his face with my hands and pressed my body against his. Justin's hand rested on my hip, moving up and down slowly.

He pulled away from the kiss and captured my neck with his lips. Justin sucked, kissed and licked at my neck. It drove me crazy and I let him know by letting out a soft moan by his ear.

Justin pushed me back on the bed and smirked down at me. He leaned down and kissed me, he moved his hands down to my knees and pushed my legs apart.

Without a word he went to work, he pushed his penis against my clit. He worked his hips around in a circle; I swear I felt like I actually was in heaven.

"Oh God…" I bellowed and closed my eyes tightly. Justin ran his hand over my belly and flicked my bellybutton. I jumped a little.

"Ah fuck…" He cursed. He sounded so sexy when he cursed in bed. His voice would get really low and the look on his face would be priceless. He would bite down on his lower lip and scrunch up his forehead. I loved that face.

I opened my eyes and he was doing that face. I instantly grinned when I saw it and leaned up, placing a short kiss on his lips.

"Mmm my girl…" Justin turned the direction that his hips were moving causing me to orgasm once again. I came with a fury, clenching my hands together tightly and moaning.

Justin just grinned at me, loving the fact that he had such a control over me.

"Someone's easily excited aren't they?" Justin teased. I just rolled my eyes and laughed.

"I'm sorry it doesn't take me like 3 years to cum."

"Get ready for many more orgasms baby girl." Justin pushed my legs apart again and pushed his dick into my pussy.

"Shit Justin!" I yelled out, just as I said that he hit my g-spot straight on. "Oh… God!!!!"

"You like the way I fuck you baby? You like it?" Justin groaned, slamming his cock into me harder than before.

"I love the way you fuck me…" I panted, and slammed my hips up against his. His 9 and half inch dick was buried deep inside me and he refused to move.

He leaned down and kissed my breasts, grabbing one of them with his mouth. His tongue ran across my nipple and I whimpered.

"Baby please…"

"Please what?"

"Fuck me… please!"

Justin started to suck my tit. I tried desperately to move my hips, but he held them down in place on the bed.

"In a minute…" Justin bit down on my nipple, I moaned in both pleasure and pain. God, he was amazing in bed. It seemed to get better every time we fucked.

The mobster smiled at me, his face looking like a picture of innocence. He reeled his huge dick out of me, leaving only his head inside me and slammed back into my cunt with a force.

"UUHHHH!" I cried out. Nothing in my life had ever felt this good. It was like I was on E, not that I'd really know what that was like. I was a good girl and had never tried any drug in my life… not even weed. I know everyone says I’m lame but whatever.

"God… you're so fucking hot." He moaned, grabbing my legs and bending them over his shoulders. This gave him more room for penetration. 

I just smirked at him and licked my lips. I called him down to me with my finger and kissed him deeply. I ran the tip of my tongue along the length of his tongue. Justin moaned into my mouth, sending chills down my spine.

Justin let his hand wander down between our banging bodies and joyously found my engorged clit. He pinched and twisted it until I screamed out his name.

"Cum, angel. Come on… cum for me." Justin squeezed my clit harder. My eyes closed shut but he was not going to have that. "Look at me, Natalia."

"I can't…" I whined, my voice was dripping with sex. Justin's motions stopped and my body lay aching.

"Look at me, Natalia." He demanded, his voice becoming deeper and more commanding. I opened my blue eyes and he smiled. "That's my girl." He continued his motions and I gasped. I couldn't hold on anymore. I came furiously, drenching his penis with my juices.

"JUSTIN!!"

My walls spasmed around Justin's cock and he came right after me.

"FUCK!!! Natalia!! GOD!" He yelled out, filling my tiny body up with his warm seed. I could barely move, let alone catch my breath.

We laid there for a moment, relishing in the nirvana we just shared. God, the sex was amazing. He was amazing. Justin leaned down and kissed my lips softly.

I curled up next to him and just closed my eyes. I hadn't felt this good in so long; just being next to him, and feeling so safe again, it was something I missed. After a little while, he leaned down and kissed my forehead.

"I love you." He whispered suddenly. Oh my God… he didn't say that. No. Oh God.

I just pretended to be asleep. I couldn't say anything to that. I mean I wasn't ready and oh God. I SLEPT WITH HIM!! MULTIPLE TIMES!!! I just shut my eyes and forced myself to sleep.

Chapter 23

I woke up the next morning with a loud yawn. The hotel room was dark, the heavy white drapes were closed but small bits of sunlight managed to peak through.

I sat up in bed and stretched, all the while managing to clutch the comforter to my naked body. I was so sore after last night.

Justin was still sleeping next to me; I didn't want to bother him so I crept out of bed and headed to the bathroom to wash up. There was a big antique style tub. I climbed into in and turned on the water.

The water had a nice, soothing effect on my aching body. I laid back in the tub and ran the soapy water over my arms and legs. After I finally finished, I climbed out of the tub and dried myself off with a big heavy towel that was hanging in the bathroom.

I didn't feel like heading back into the room wearing a towel, so I just grabbed a white, silk bathrobe that was hanging on the door. I put it on and loosely tied it around myself.

When I walked back into the bedroom to search for my clothes, I noticed to my dismay that Justin was awake and talking on his phone. He pointed to the bed, where some clean clothes were laid out for me. They were obviously his and would be big on me, but I decided to put them on anyway.

"Yeah… I'll be there at 11. I'll take care of it don't worry." He said, I knew it had something to do with work. Justin gave me a half smile, standing in his boxers and nothing more.

He had such a sexy body.

I picked the clothes up off the bed and turned to look at him. He just stood there watching me and continuing his conversation. I untied my robe and placed it on the bed. Justin was licking his lips, but I pretended not to notice.

"Yes, Mr. Ryan. I'm worried about him too…he hasn't been himself in a long time." His voice was shaking. I loved teasing him.

I pulled the long wife beater on and followed it with the baggy sweat pants.

"Yes… Mr. Ryan I'm sorry but I need to go. I'll meet you at 11. Bye." Justin shut off his phone and I smiled innocently at him.

"Hi." I said simply. He just walked over to me and kissed me deeply.

"Morning, my angel. Why didn't you wake me up when you went to shower? We could have showered together." He pouted. I just kissed his lips and smiled.

"I didn't wake you because if I did we would have ended up having sex in the shower and I'm too sore for that. Anyway, you looked adorable when you were sleeping so I didn't wanna wake you."

"I'm sorry I was rough with you." Justin replied. "It's just… I wanted you for a long time now… and…"

"Baby don't worry about it. It's not like I didn't enjoy it." I grinned at him. "But anyway… I need to get going. Thanks for everything."

"Wait…Do you wanna eat something? I mean I could order room service…"

I shook my head and half-smiled at him. He really wanted me to stay. I couldn't understand him. I didn't know why he loved me so much. I wasn't that damn special. I was just like any other girl. Why did he have such a fixation on me?

"No… I really need to get going. I mean everyone is probably really worried about me." I slipped on my shoes, a pair of black heels, which looked awkward with the sweats. I really didn't care though.

"I'll drive you. Just let me throw some clothes on…"

"Are you sure? I mean I can just take a cab…"

"It's fine. Don't worry." Justin grabbed some clothes from his dresser. A pair of jeans and a plain black t-shirt. I almost pouted when he put his clothes on, his body was now covered up.

He grabbed my hand and pulled me towards the elevator. Once we got in, he handed me my cell phone that he had taken last night and never given back. I just half smiled and looked down at the screen. I had 30 missed calls.

Wasn't I the popular one.

I flipped through the missed call list, seeing my brother had called the majority of the times. Hope, Savannah and Ricky had also called, even my mother.

I cringed for a moment and snapped the phone back shut and clipped it to the side of my pants.

"Everything okay?"

"Yeah… besides the fact that I got 30 missed calls. I don't even wanna check my voicemails." I confessed and brushed a strand of hair away from my eyes. He just smirked.

"I'm sorry about causing such a scene last night but it was the only way I could get you to listen to me."

"I know… I'm just a stubborn person."

"I've realized that and actually come to love that quality that you have. I love everything about you…" Justin stated and pulled me into his embrace. He leaned down and kissed me so tenderly and with such emotion, that my knees started to buckle.

Justin held onto me by the small of my back. Our bodies were pushed up against each other. My phone started to vibrate against us and I quickly pushed away from him and looked down. It was Ricky.

"Hi." I answered it like nothing. I was immediately greeted by Ricky yelling at me.

"Don't fucking say hi, like nothing fucking happened. Do you understand how fucking worried me and everyone else was about you? Where are you, are you alright?"
I cringed and moved the phone away from my ear. Justin just watched and laughed. I turned and gave him a dirty look and he quickly stopped.

"I just got caught up… I'm fine though." I sighed and bit at my lip. Justin and I reached the first floor and headed out of the elevator. He held my clothes from last night in a shopping bag.

"What did that psycho do to you Natalia?"

"Nothing. I'm on my way home and we'll talk then okay?"

"Fine. I'm sorry I'm acting like such an ass I was just worried." Ricky explained to me through the phone. I just half smiled.

"Don't worry about it, I understand. I love you, Rick. Bye." I snapped my phone shut and looked up at Justin. His black Mercedes convertible was driven up to the front of the hotel by some guy that worked at the hotel.

Justin helped me into the passenger’s seat, and then walked around to the driver’s side. He got into the car and just drove off.

The car had the brand new smell to it. I loved that scent. It sucks when it starts to fade away, but if I had money like Justin's I could just keep buying new cars.

But then again I'm weird and I love the smell of gasoline and freshly lit matches.

"I really wish we could spend the day together…" Justin sighed and continued driving.

"I know but we're both busy…"

"But I'd make time…I don't really need to work…"

"Justin… don't worry about it. We have plenty of time to see each other and I really need to calm my family down." I leaned over and kissed his cheek.

"Alright baby girl… I'll give you a call tonight." He stopped in front of my apartment building and I just nodded.

"You have my number?"

"Yeah… I mean I knew where you lived without asking. I think I know something simple like you're phone number."

"Stalker." I said and rolled my eyes. "Alright… bye." I leaned over and kissed him softly. He ran his hand down my face and I smiled, before stepping out of his car and into my apartment.

**

"Natalia!" Ricky yelled as I walked into the apartment. He threw his arms around me and spun me around. "I was so fucking worried about you."

"I know but I'm fine." I grinned. "But I'm starving, wanna go get some breakfast with me?"

"Alright…" My gay best friend ran to his bedroom and grabbed his wallet. He headed back to the doorway and shook his head. "Maybe you should change…"

I looked down at Justin's baggy clothes and laughed. "Yeah… gimme a second."

I headed into my bedroom and picked out a pair of black terry cloth pants and a white tank top that said "Mrs. Christiansen" on it. You HAVE to love Hayden Christiansen.

I headed back over to Ricky and he looked at me oddly.

"Why are you walking like that?"

"Like what?" I asked and raised an eyebrow. We strolled out of the building to where his car was parked outside.

"Like you were out getting fucked all night." I put my seatbelt on and refused to look at him. "Oh my God you were!!!"

"Maybe." I winked at him. He shrieked out and slammed his hand down on the steering wheel.

"YOU DID!!"

"Yeah, and it was REALLY good."

"God damn. I can't believe my innocent little Natalia had sex with a big, scary mobster." Ricky shook his head.

"Little innocent Natalia had sex with him more than once." I replied, Ricky's mouth dropped. "And you got the big part right but not scary. He was a perfect gentlemen."

"Good Lord. No wonder you're walking like a penguin." I smacked his arm as he drove up to this tiny restaurant. We headed inside and sat down in the back at a table. "So dish. What happened."

"Well, we were in his limo with Hope and Tommy. They got out, screaming at each other and Justin kinda seduced me."

"You fucked in a limo? God, that's hot. I wanna do that with Louis."

"So you and Lou are back together? "I inquired. He grinned at me.

"Yeah… but he wants to talk to you."

"No problem. I wanna apologize to him." Ricky smiled as I said that. Our waiter came and we ordered a bunch of breakfast foods.

"So anyway… everyone is like uber pissed at you."

"But that's not my fault… I mean I'm entitled to have fun…"

"And you did have you're fun… but I mean, Justin's great and all but he's a psycho. He shot Andrew and he kidnapped you. How could you trust him?"

"I don't know… I mean I know his job is crazy… but I know he'd never hurt me. He also makes me feel safe… as odd as that sounds."

"It does sound very odd. But I guess you should trust you're instincts… I just don't want you to end up dead in a gutter." Ricky said and leaned back in his seat.

"I won't. I can take care of myself. But as for what happened last night, that's just going to be between you and me. I don't want Andrew finding out and if Hope knows she'll tell him. Besides the fact that it's beyond awkward that my brother knows I've had sex, I don't want him to kill Justin."

"So what are you gonna say?"

"I have no idea… I may just say we went out and talked and I fell asleep."

"That could work."

I ran my hand through my hair and placed my head in my hand. Sure it was going to work, and it did. I did avoid Justin for a while. He constantly called my phone and left messages. I avoided seeing him the most. I knew he would come around work so I switched up my hours.

What I didn't know was that as much as I tried, I wouldn't be able to get away from Justin. He just couldn't let me go.

Chapter 24

Hope, Ricky, Savannah and I decided to go to Manhattan beach one day towards the end of June. It had been a week since the 'incident' with Justin. I hadn't spoken to him or seen him since then.

I laid on my hot pink Hello Kitty towel, wearing a red bikini. I flipped through the radio stations, trying to find a good song. Coming up empty handed, I opened my cd case and put on my CKY volume 1 cd. "96 quite bitter things" filled the air and I smiled.

Hope looked up from reading a magazine and grinned at me.

"Very good song."

"Definitely. That's why I picked it." I stuck my tongue out at her and laughed. She rolled her eyes and went back to reading her wrestling magazine.

I headed over to the cooler and grabbed a coke from it. I snapped it open and sipped it greedily. It was so hot that day so it made the drink really refreshing.

"Hey! Natalia, come in the water with me?" Ricky asked, I nodded and put my drink down.

"I'll race you." I grinned, but before I could go anywhere my phone started ringing. "Hold that thought."

I looked down at my cell phone and on the ID what I had come to learn was Justin's number popped up. I cringed and shoved my cell phone back into my bag.

"Not answering that one. Are you guys coming in the water?" I asked to Hope and Savannah.

"Maybe later." Hope replied, Savannah heard nothing being that she was fast asleep.

"Alright…" I got up to my feet and grinned at Ricky. "Ready…GO!" We made our way down the burning hot sand to the water. I jumped into the water, hysterically laughing.

"CHEATER!" Ricky called after me and jumped next to me. He completely soaked me.

"No. I'm just better than you." I beamed at my best friend and proceeded to jump on his back. Ricky swam deeper into the water where we proceeded to talk.

"Have you answered his calls at all Natalia?"

"Nope."

"Do you plan on answering them?"

"Nope."

"NATALIA!" Ricky exclaimed. I didn't look up at him. I knew what he was going to say and I knew I was wrong for not calling him or even bothering with him. "You slept with the guy and you're like fucking in love with him and you're just gonna ignore him?!"

"I don't love him!" I screeched back at Ricky. He just rolled his eyes.

"Like hell you don't. I can tell you do."

"Ricky, I don't fucking love him. He's a psycho and I'm SO not ending up with a guy like that."

"A guy like what? A guy that you're family doesn't approve of?" Ricky stood before me and grabbed my shoulders. The waves were slamming up against us but it didn't matter. "Fuck what they say, Nat. You need to stop caring so damn much about making them happy and start making YOURSELF happy."

"I am happy." I lied, in fact I wasn't. I was always thinking about Justin, I was always missing him and wondering what he was doing. But it was for the best.

"Bullshit. You're always moping around and I've heard you crying at night…"

Why did he always have to be right? As much as I didn't want to admit it, Ricky was right. I mean he knew me so well and I was hurting really bad.

"I'm fine. I don't need a guy to make me happy."

"But why give up on love when you have the chance for it?"

"Because he just seems to be hurting everyone around me. I'd rather be single and alone than have everyone hurt around me." I headed back toward shore when Ricky grabbed my wrist.

"Don't run away from love, from what I see with Justin, he's not going to let you get away so easily…"

"I realize that, but there's no other way… last week was a mistake…" I said, I looked down at the water and I heard Ricky sigh. The water began to get colder and I pulled away from Ricky's grasp and headed back to the towel.

"You know it wasn't a mistake, Nat! I saw the way you laughed and smiled about it. You're just being stubborn."

"I am SO not being stubborn."

"I agree that she's being stubborn!" Savannah said from her towel. I turned and gave her a dirty look.

"You don't even know what we're fighting about!"

"Yeah but I love to annoy you."

I rolled my eyes and sat back down on my towel. I dried myself off with my extra towel and laid down on my stomach. Ricky was ready to keep talking but I really didn't want to listen, I turned the radio up high so I wouldn't have to deal with his words. I knew I was wrong but I wasn't about to say it.

"Natalia?" I heard from a short distance. I looked up and squinted my eyes, unable to really see because of the sun shining in my eyes.

"Yeah?" I sat up and came face to face with all my friends from high school. Well all two of them and their boyfriends. It was Hollie, Tim, Kayla and Mitch. "OH MY GOD!"

I ran over to my friends and hugged them tightly. I couldn't believe it. I hadn't seen them in a year. It was crazy.

"I can't believe this! What a small world!" Hollie said with a smile.

I saw Ricky cringe from the corner of my eye. He threw a towel over his head and laid back down on his towel. He despised Hollie, I thought it was hysterical.

"I know! We should have kept in touch after high school." I stated. They both nodded.

"Definitely. Let's exchange numbers and we can all hang out." Kayla said, we stored the numbers into our cell phones and continued laughing and joking around. It was so good to see them again.

They left and I laid back down on the towel. I pushed down the straps of my bikini and applied some more sun tan oil on me. I closed my eyes and eventually started to drift off to the sound of "Vindicated" by Dashboard Confessional.

That's when the light just disappeared. I suspected that it was a cloud at first, so I didn't say anything.

"What the hell are you doing here?" I heard Hope say. By the tone of her voice I could tell she was really annoyed. I opened my eyes and there was Justin standing over me.

"I was just at the beach so I decided to say hi…" Justin looked at Hope. "We used to be best friends, why are you acting like such a bitch to me?"

"Don't fucking call her a bitch." Savannah stood up and shoved Justin backwards. He stumbled and fell on his ass in the sand.

Ricky and I exchanged glances. He just looked at me triumphantly. He knew he was right, he knew that there was no way for me to avoid Justin now. He was here.

"You didn't have to hit me. Jesus." Justin climbed back up and Savannah was ready to swing at him again. I got up and stood in between them.

"Okay… breathe. No fighting please?" I gave Savannah a look as if to back off. Justin was fucking dangerous and if he wanted to he could have her taken out. I did not need one of my best friends ending up dead.

"He started it." Savannah said in a little kid way. She sat back down on the sand and just watched him.

"Natalia come take a walk with me. We need to talk." Justin stated, it was more like an order than a question. I just nodded and headed off down the beach with him. "How are you?"

"I'm fine." I replied awkwardly.

"You never called me back."

"I've just been busy…"

"Don't lie to me. You've been avoiding me." Justin stated, I turned and looked at him. He was really hurt and I couldn't help but to feel guilty.

DAMNIT! Ricky was right. I did love him, and I did want to be with him. I was reminded of that every time I saw him.

"Okay… you're right I did avoid you."

"But why?"

"Maybe I was just scared… I mean God, Justin. This isn't easy. You're in the freakin Mafia and you shot my brother. Maybe I don't wanna feel the way I do."

"How do you feel?"

"Sexually attracted to you." I lied, not able to tell him that I loved him. I was in a way ashamed of my feelings. I couldn't let him know that I actually was in love with him.

"Oh." Was all I got in reply.

"I like hanging out with you Justin. It's just my family and friends aren't going to take too kindly to you being around all the time…"

"So what are you saying?"

"I wanna see you, but I don't want Andrew or Hope or Savannah to find out."

"Fine." Justin replied and scratched his head. The sun was beating down on him and beads of sweat were forming on his muscular chest. He looked so hot. God, I wanted him.

"I'll call you this time, and I promise I will."

"Good… I need to get going. I can't wait to hear from you." He leaned over and kissed me quickly on the lips.

I watched him walk away and sighed. I wished I didn't love him.

hapter 25

"Hey… Where are you guys?" I asked Hollie over the phone. I had just found a parking spot outside this pool hall. I was sitting inside my car with the air conditioner blasting, not wanting to walk into the pool hall alone if no one was there.

"Yeah, we're all inside sweetie. We're towards the back."

"Alright, I'll be right in." I hung up the phone and got out of the car. I made sure to beep my car shut and stuffed my keys into my Coach bag.

I headed inside the semi-crowded pool hall and saw my friends in the back. We had made plans for the Fourth of July weekend to hang out and play pool. It was great because I adored my friends and missed hanging out with them.

And Justin… well…we were seeing each other. But it was on the sneak. Ricky knew about it, but that was it. I couldn't bear to tell Hope or Savannah, I just thought they would be so disappointed in me.

But I had to say, I was really happy. He just seemed to bring a smile to my face with just a thought of him, or the sight of him or just by the sound of his voice. I knew I did love him; I just wasn't ready to let him know that.

**

It was a few days earlier; Justin and I had gone to the beach at night to talk and just be together. We were lying down on a blanket, just staring up at the stars. Everything was just so perfect.

"If you could change one thing about your life, what would it be?" I asked Justin out of the blue. A lot of people say I'm a really random person that I just say things that are just so whacked out, but sometimes it's good to do that. You get to know a person.

"What do you mean?"

"If you could change something about yourself or about the way something around you is? What would it be?"

"My Mom and sister would still be alive. I would have never kidnapped you, but I would have still gone after you." He replied, I half smiled.

"So I still would have been stalked?"

"Yep." Justin laughed, I leaned over and bit his arm lightly. "Ow! Hey! Mean."

"I'm so not mean." I pouted and laid my head back down. "But if I could change something…I would change how stubborn I am, and I'd of been born rich."

"Nice." Justin shook his head and smirked.

"But I mean the one thing I want that I can't change, is that I wish my Abuela would still be alive. I mean I know it was her time to go, because she was old and she was suffering, but I miss her. I think back and I can't believe she's been gone for only 5 years. It feels like so much longer."

"I know how you feel. Some days it feels like so much longer than 15 years that my Mother and sister died. Other days I can still picture my sister playing with her dolls and I can still see my Mom smiling at me, and telling me to protect my sister when we'd go play outside." He stared off for a moment, with this look in his eye and smile on his face. Justin's eyes started to tear up and he quickly wipes the tears away.

"Why does life have to be hard?"

"Because if it wasn't then we wouldn't learn anything, and we wouldn't experience anything. With pain comes knowledge and strength and compassion for others. It makes you truly human."

"When did you become the philosopher?" I giggled and poked Justin in the side.

"When you go through a lot of hardships you have to look on the bright side." Justin explained and pulled me closer to him. His strong arms were wrapped around me and I just felt so safe. "When I met you, I finally reached the bright side. Instead of always gazing at it from afar, I finally was able to get there."

"That was cute." I replied, placing a small kiss on his lips. "A little corny, but cute."

"Awww come on. I'm no poet but I tried with that one."

"It was corny. I'm sorry."

"Whatever! Bitch."

"I am SO not a bitch!" I replied and pouted at him.

"You know I was kidding baby…" He leaned over and kissed me softly, and goddamn, I melted. I was like putty in his hands.

**

"What's up guys?" I asked with a smile as I walked over to my friends. They were already playing a game of pool, so I just walked over and kissed everyone hello and sat down on a stool to watch them.

"Nothin, me and Tim are kicking Kayla and Mitch's asses!" Hollie exclaimed with a giggle. She grabbed her boyfriend's ass and placed a kiss on his lips.

"Please! We can still catch up!" Mitch replied and crossed his arms.

Mitch was always like that. He always had to win and he always had to be right.  He annoyed the shit out of me sometimes; we had a brother sister relationship.

"Man, just admit it, you fucking suck!" Tim laughed and made his shot, getting the solid red ball into the corner pocket. He was really hot and I had always had a slight crush on him, too bad he belonged to Hollie.

"Nice!" I stated with a laugh. "I'm sorry but my money's on Hollie and Tim."

"Just shut up Natalia. You bitch." Mitch joked; I stuck my middle finger up at him and grinned.

"So anyway, where's your mysterious boyfriend?" Kayla questioned and took her shot. She missed and huffed loudly.

"He'll be here soon. He just had some work to do." I said, shuffling through my bag and pulling out my pack of Orbit.

I popped a piece of the Orbit gum in my mouth and I swear to God, I felt like the commercial. It really does make you feel clean!

"Goddamn is that guy like always working?!" Hollie said, kidding around.

"Oh fuck you."

We continued playing pool. I suck so badly so I just watched. I attempted to play but I got massacred. I've always been terrible at pool.

**

About an hour later, Hollie, Kayla and I sat on a bunch of stools and watched Mitch and Tim play 9 ball. They were both pretty good so it was turning out to be a close game.

"Come on baby! Make the shot!" Kayla exclaimed, I giggled, mostly because I could see her becoming a soccer mom.

Mitch missed the shot and almost threw his pool stick across the room.

"Jesus! Look at that guy… he's gorgeous." Hollie whispered to us. I was looking down at my cell phone, checking a text message from Ricky. I died laughing when I read the message, "I GOT LUCKY!"

"Oh my God…" Kayla squealed. "He really is."

"And his body… it's just…"

"UHN!" My two friends exclaimed at the same time. I looked up at them quickly and snickered.

"You guys are insane!" I shook my head at my psychotic friends and flipped my cell phone shut. "Who's hot?"

"Him… the guy in the dark gray shirt and jeans." Hollie answered, I looked straight ahead and met Justin's gaze.

"He's not bad." I said, grinning at him.
“Not that bad? Woman are you blind?! He’s so fucking hot!” Kayla practically screamed.

Justin walked right up to me and kissed me softly. I heard my friends gasp and I wanted to laugh. We pulled away from the kiss and smiled at each other.

"Hey baby girl."

"Hi J. I missed you." I turned and looked at my friends. "Everyone this is Justin… Justin, this is Kayla, Hollie, Mitch and Tim." I pointed to every one of them and they waved. But the looks on Kayla and Hollie's faces were priceless.

"Nice to meet you." Mitch shook his hand and then Tim did the same.

My arms were wrapped around Justin's neck and I refused to let go of him. He smelled so good and he felt so good, it was like pure perfection. 

"You too." Justin answered. He sat down on the stool and I quickly made my way on his lap. "Who's winning?"

"Mitch is but that won't be for much longer." Tim said and took a shot. He got it in and jumped up. "Fuck yeah! I'm catching up bitch!"

"You play pool baby?" I smiled; Justin shook his head and laughed.

"Eh… yeah I'm alright. Tommy always kicks my ass in it."

"He probably rigs it. That bastard."

Justin just laughed at my logic and shook his head. His arms were wrapped tightly around my waist and I just felt so safe right there. Yeah, it was a seedy pool hall but it didn't matter. I was with him.

"Do you guys wanna go after this game?" Kayla asked Justin and I. I just nodded.

"Yeah that's cool… what do you guys wanna do?"

"I figured we could go back to my house. My parents are out and we have the pool and the hot tub. We could get the gang together again. It'll be fun." Hollie stated. I just nodded.

What she meant by "the gang" was the tiny group we'd hang out with in high school which consisted of me, Ricky, Hollie, Kayla, Mitch, Tim, and these other people that I was cool with but didn't really know all that well. There was also my ex, Dylan, but I doubted they'd bring him along.

"Sure. Sounds good."

"Annnd…. I WIN!" Tim yelled as he got the last ball into the left corner pocket as he stated. He jumped up and laughed. "I kicked your ass you pussy."

"Fuck you. I'll beat you next time." Mitch replied, laughing.

And we with that we were off to Hollie's house. God damn, I was in for a night of surprises.

Chapter 26

We had spent about a half an hour in Hollie's house before the people started to arrive. We basically hung out and joked around. I could tell they really had started to like Justin.

When Ricky arrived, I was more than thrilled. I ran to him and gave him and Louis a hug. I was a little nervous about the Louis thing, especially since what had happened in the past. I thought it was better to take things head on and try kindness.

"Hey guys… I'm so glad you could come." I beamed at the both of them, mostly at Louis though. I didn't want him to hate me!

"Eh." Ricky said, I just laughed, knowing that he couldn't stand Hollie. But it was cool because it was like the old days where we all hung out practically everyday. I don't think Hollie bothered him as much as he led on anyway.

"Oh shush." I rolled my eyes at him and grinned. "Justin's here."

"No shit…where?"

"He's sitting by the pool with Mitch and Tim." I stated and pointed over to him. Ricky just smiled.

"I'm happy for you, Nat. I'm glad you opened your eyes." Ricky said and patted me on the back. I just smiled; inside it was killing me that all along he was right, but I was still happy that things were okay.

"I'm happy for you too. He looks like a really great guy." Louis said, I swear to God I almost awed out loud. How cute was that?

"Thanks. I'm happy for you and Ricky too…and I'm really sorry for what happened."

"It's alright… Ricky explained the story to me… is he really in the mob?"

"Yep, he kidnapped me too." I said and just kind of shrugged. Louis just kind of laughed.

"I guess everyone has their bad points."

"Yeah, but it's over now and all that matters is that they're happy." Ricky responded and wrapped his arms around Louis. He placed a kiss on his cheek, and Louis giggled.

I smiled at the two of them, really happy for them but at the same time kind of weirded out because I've never seen Ricky in a relationship. He was so happy too.

I guess it was because Ricky's like a brother to me and it's crazy to see that after all the years of heartaches and the years of crying together about being single he's happy. I mean it's crazy, I'm happy too. I never thought the day would come when I'd be this much in love.

"Come on let's go see Justin." I said and the three of us quickly headed over to my sexy boyfriend who was laughing with Tim and some of his friends. "Hi baby."

I sat down on his lap and placed a kiss on his lips. Ricky and Louis pulled up two chairs next to us and I proceeded to properly introduce them. I mean last time was crazy.

"Okay Justin, this is Ricky and Louis. Ricky and Louis this is Justin."

"Nice to meet you." Justin said and shook their hands. "I'm sorry about everything before…"

"It's okay don't worry." Ricky smiled warmly. "Just blame Natalia. That's what I always do."

"Okay… fuck you." I said with a short laugh.

"Hey! That's my job!" Louis said and pulled Ricky into an embrace. I couldn't help but to giggle.

"You guys are a couple?" Justin asked.

"Yeah." Ricky beamed proudly.

"And such an adorable couple." I leaned over and pinched Ricky's cheek.

"Okay, I remember. You were the guy that Ricky ran after that night…" Justin stated, and pulled me tighter into his embrace.

"Yeah but let’s not think about that." Louis replied. I spaced off for a second and snapped out of it suddenly.

"I'm hungry. Go get me food." I ordered Ricky. He rolled his eyes.

"Get it yourself."

"No! Please?"

"Ugh. Fine. Come on Louis." Ricky said and got up from his seat. He held his hand out to Louis and the two of them headed over to the barbecue, where Mitch was trying to make some food. The key word is trying.

I cuddled closer to Justin and gave him a soft peck on the cheek.

"Are you having fun?"

"Yeah I am. You're friends are pretty cool."

"I'm glad you like them. It means a lot to me." I responded and played with the hem of his shirt. "Thank you for trying with Ricky and Louis. I know you really didn't like him."

"I didn't like him because I was jealous. But he's cool, don't worry about it. You worry too much."

"I don't mean to it's just… I want everything to be okay."

"It will be… " Just as Justin said this, a familiar face came pummeling into the party. More specifically it was my ex-boyfriend, Dylan.

The color in my face drained when I set eyes on him. He couldn't be here. He just couldn't. Dylan broke my heart the summer before; telling me that he felt our relationship was going nowhere. I mean so what I didn't love him, but I gave him my virginity and I cared deeply for him. I liked having a boyfriend.

But he just left me in the rain; he threw me to the side. I heard later on that he was engaged and my heart just shattered. But it was over and there's no use crying over spilled milk.

Ricky did tell me that you’d always have some sort of feelings for your ex still, no matter how long it's been over. I definitely knew that was true, especially when he walked into the party. I knew I still cared for him.

I grabbed Justin's hand protectively, and I kind of spaced out. I knew he was talking to me but the words didn't make sense. They just wouldn't register in my head.

"Baby… are you okay?"

"Yeah I'm fine." I said and looked up at him, I fake smiled and by the look on his face I knew he could tell something was up.

"Don't give me that… what's wrong?"

"Nothing. I promise." I cupped his face in my hands and kissed him softly.

I turned back around and almost died when I saw that Dylan had noticed me and was making his way over. God, I almost started to hyperventilate. All I kept thinking was why me?

"Natalia… hey… I haven't seen you in a while."

I got off Justin's lap and just stared at Dylan, I couldn't believe the man I had spent a year of my life with was standing before me, acting like nothing. He had ripped my heart apart and was probably trying to come back and do it again.

"I know… it's been a while…"

"How have you been?" He asked, it was like he was staring right through me. I just bit my lip and stared right back.

"Okay… how about you?"

"I heard what happened in January…the kidnapping… I'm glad you're alright."

"Thanks…" I said and half-smiled. I pushed my hair behind my ear, the nervous habit I always do. He knew that too, he knew a lot about me, and he could probably see right through my stone demeanor.

"You never change, Natalia. You're as beautiful as the day I met you, maybe more so." Dylan ran his hand down my face and I forgot where I was.

I could have sworn that I was still his girlfriend. Well, that was until Justin got up from his seat and stood glaring at Dylan. Thinking back on it, I’m glad Justin made himself known.

"Hi, I'm Justin Timberlake, Natalia's boyfriend… and you are?"

"I'm Dylan Morelli…and I know who you are Justin. We met through Larry Lopez a few weeks ago."

"Oh…" Justin's eyes darkened and he pulled me closer to him. "Stay away from Natalia…"

I turned ready to say something to Justin, but was stopped by Dylan's response that knocked me back.

"It's my job to keep an eye on her and to keep the likes of you away from her."

"Excuse me?" I turned and stared at Dylan and Justin like they were crazy. "Neither of you can tell me who I can and cannot see."

"Natalia just fucking listen for once. Let's get out of here and I'll take you home." Dylan grabbed my arm and pulled me away from Justin's grasp.

"Get off me Dylan!"

"You heard the lady, get off her." Justin stepped up into Dylan's face, and to my surprise, Dylan punched Justin in the face and grabbed my arm.

"Let's go… NOW!"

Dylan dragged me out the door, while Justin followed behind. All I could hear was Justin yelling. I was so humiliated that this had to happen in front of everyone. I mean the party had gone dead silent and all eyes were on us. It was just my luck.

"DYLAN MORELLI, LET GO OF ME!!!!!!"

"Would you shut the fuck up and go already?!" My ex-boyfriend yelled at me. He stopped in front of his black Expedition and unlocked the car. "GET IN!"

I refused to move, especially since Justin had just caught up to us. I ran to him, unsure of what was going on. I started to freak out when I saw Justin had a gun in his hand.

WHAT THE HELL WAS GOING ON?!

"Leave her the fuck alone, I don't know what's going on here right now or what the Lopez's want, but if you don't get the fuck out of here I will murder you, you scumbag." Justin threatened. I was shaking and just standing in the middle of the crossfire.

"Fine. I'll leave quietly because I know the Ryan's fight dirty, but trust me, this isn't the end." Dylan shook his head and walked down the block, away from us and his car.

I just ran to my car with Justin following me. I got into the driver’s seat, shaking with fear. Justin climbed into the passenger’s seat and stared at me.

"We need to talk."

"I think so too." I responded, and drove off to a park near by where Justin and I could talk.

**

This was it; it was the night where Savannah was going to go on her "date" with JC. She was of course freaked out about it, especially since she hadn't told anyone that she was going on it.

In a way she thought it was both a blessing and a curse. If anyone knew she was going out with JC they would freak out and they would disapprove, but if they didn't know then if something happened to her no one would know where she was.

Savannah decided not to wear a skirt because she didn't want to give him any ideas. She had no intentions of sleeping with him, she just wanted a friend. You could never have too many friends… right?

She tore through her closet, finally deciding on a pair of black Capris, a soft pink-laced tube top and a pair of black heels.

"It's just dinner. Chill out." Savannah kept telling herself as she applied some light makeup. The bell rang in the empty apartment and Savannah ran for the door.

It was the beginning of long relationship of twists and turns for Savannah.

Chapter 27

We drove to the park in silence. I had no idea what he was going to confess to me, and to be honest I was scared. I mean, how in the hell did he know Dylan?

I wasn't stupid, I knew it had something to do with the mob; I was getting the feeling that Dylan was in the mafia too. Great, two boyfriends that are in the mob. What the hell were the odds of that blunder?

I parked by the park and got out of the car. Justin followed my lead and when he was out, I locked the car door.

The two of us headed deep into the park, past all the small children running and playing, past the people playing basketball, past everyone and everything until we were alone.

"What's going on, Justin?"

"He's in the mob…"

"I figured that." I replied, annoyed. I put my hands on my hips and stared back at the man I was in love with. The man who kept so many secrets from me.

"Your Uncle is in close with them…he hired them to keep me away from you…"

"What?" I didn't know what to feel, but these words I was hearing didn't make sense. Didn't my Uncle learn his lesson when I got kidnapped? Didn't he see that you shouldn't fuck with these people?

"They stepped to us a few weeks ago. The first night we had sex in New York, Tommy called me because they had begun to step up. They ruined one of Tommy's shipments as a message to us. I was supposed to take out Dylan that night as a message to them…"

"But you turned down the job…JC was supposed to do it?"

"JC took out someone else… and someone really important, Larry Lopez's son. So now we're at war with them." Justin explained and I just rubbed my forehead with the palm of my hand.

"What exactly is a war?"

"We fight each other, trying to take everyone of us out until either one of us gives up and we get there territory or until we take out all the leaders."

"Do I want to know whose winning?" I asked nervously.

"We are… but the Ryan's are much bigger and more powerful than the Lopez's, they stand no chance."

"Justin I don't want you to get hurt…" I walked over to him and hugged him tightly.

"I'll be fine… don't worry. I just need you to be careful…" Justin stated and kissed my forehead. I refused to let go of him, mostly because I was terrified of the thought of him dying.

"They'll come after me?"

"No, especially because you're Uncle is working with them…"

"Wait… my Uncle is working with them or he's paying them?" I questioned, Justin just closed his eyes and looked away from me. "Answer me, Justin."

"Natalia, I wasn't supposed to tell you that…"

"He's working with them."

I was beyond shocked. My Uncle was working for the mob?! What the fuck was going on? I mean my family wasn't like that. We were good people; we didn't kill people for money.

Or so I thought. My world was crumbling down at that point.

"Oh my God…" I covered my mouth with my hand, wanting to just throw up. I was disgusted with my family and with myself for not seeing this sooner.

"I'm sorry…"

"You didn't do anything wrong, don't be." I said, as I regained my composer. I didn't understand how this was possible.

"I love you Natalia… I hate to see you hurting like this…" He leaned over and kissed my cheek.

"It's just I can't believe how stupid I was."

"You weren't stupid… you just didn't know. You never thought your family would do anything like that…" Justin said, soothing me with his words. He cradled me in his arms, and I just didn't want to think anymore. I just let my lips crash down on his.

I figured the best way to forget my pain was to indulge myself. I just wanted Justin and that's what I got. He would never deny me. We headed back to his hotel room where we spent the rest of the night having sex and forgetting the world around us.

**

Savannah and JC had just finished dinner and were going for a walk on the beach. Savannah had been quiet about the fact that JC was in the mob. He seemed so normal, so sweet and so poetic.

They were so similar in everything, in their tastes in music, movies, food, and their pasts. They had both moved to Florida at a young age to start their lives over, but ended up forgetting who they were in the process.

JC just showed her kindness and generosity. He was a sweet man, but she was dying to know more about his profession.

"So what do you do for a living? We never established that basis." Savannah said with a nervous laugh. "I'm a waitress of course, but I'm trying to get into Broadway."

"Oh… uh… I help manage a coffee company…"

"You don't have to lie to me because I already know what you do." Savannah blurted out.

Fear crept into her being as JC just stared at her. She couldn't believe how stupid she was for letting on that she knew the truth. What if he tried to kill her because she knew his secret?!

"I figured you did because your friends with Natalia and Hope… but the lying was worth a shot. I thought you might get scared off if I told you the truth…"

"I'm not easily scared off." She smiled and took hold of his hand.

"I'm glad you're not because I wasn't going to let you get away so easily." JC leaned over and kissed her passionately. It was like sparks were going off for the both of them.

There had always been chemistry between them and their sexual attraction was obvious to the naked eye. But the pure emotion in the kiss had knocked them both back.

Just by that kiss, Savannah knew that this relationship could go somewhere, and she wasn't going to let JC slip away. No matter what his occupation was.

**

Andrew had taken Hope out for a night on the town. He did have an attraction toward her, but the truth was, this relationship was sparked because of his work. The work his Uncle had gotten him into.

He was too, working for the Lopez family. Andrew's job was to protect his sister but to stick it to Tommy by keeping his fiancé from running back to him.

Andrew was doing a good job of crushing Tommy's spirit.

Climbing out of bed, where Hope laid sleeping, Andrew pulled his clothes back on. He looked back at the sleeping figure of his "girlfriend" and smiled. She was gorgeous, and feelings for her had actually begun to grow slightly, but he knew once the Ryan's were out of the way that would be the end of it.

Hearing his cell phone start to ring, Andrew walked to the nightstand and grabbed the phone. He walked into the next room and answered it.

"Hello?"

"Andrew, its Dylan. I saw your sister today."

"And?"

"She was with Justin. He introduced himself as her boyfriend."

Andrew couldn't believe what he was hearing. Justin had to have been doing something to Natalia. He had to have been manipulating her, because he knew his little sister would never want to be with the likes of him.

"Did you kick him to the curb?"

"I tried but he pulled a gun out on me."

"Trigger happy bastard." Andrew hissed, remembering when Justin had shot him. He was soon going to return the favor. "You need to try to steal Natalia away from him. I'm going to keep pretending I don't know anything, but we need Natalia to keep away from him. I don't want her to get caught in the crossfire."

"All right."

"I'll tell Larry what's going on… I need to have a long talk with him anyway. We need to bring the Ryan's down." Andrew said and hung up on Dylan. He looked at his cell phone and dialed his boss, Larry Lopez.

He hoped that he could save his sister and his family.

Chapter 28

I was so burned from going to the beach every chance I could. I decided to take the night off from work and decided to just relax at home. It was strange though, everyone was home but no one was talking.

It was weird because it was like everyone was so damn secretive. I mean Ricky and me were keeping the big Justin secret from everyone and I could only imagine what Savannah and Hope knew.

Then again, I could just be paranoid. I always am anyway.

I signed off the computer after finishing enrolling in Pace for next semester. I was nervous about going back to school after such a long time. I mean things had changed and I had changed. I hoped that I would be able to get "back" on track.

I was never on track to begin with but maybe this time I'd be able to get on it.

"Rick, I'm bored."

He knew everything that had happened at Hollie's house. Ricky was very surprised to hear that Dylan was in the mob. Dylan always seemed like a nice guy to him, but I guess you could never be certain with stuff like that. People are never what they seem.

"Yeah so am I."

"Play video games with me?"

"I hate playing with you because you always win and run around like an idiot, shoving it in my face." Ricky said and continued doing work for his job at Tommy Hilfiger. He was a lucky bastard to have such a cool job.

"Don't be a sore loser."

"Then don't be a sore winner."

"Ewww. Someone's bitchy." I pouted and sat next to my gay best friend.

"I'm just busy, I'm sorry. Gimme a little while and we'll do something."

I pouted and walked behind Savannah and jumped on her and yelled, "BOO!" in her ear. She screamed and threw the phone up in the air. I died laughing at this point.

"YOU ARE SUCH A BITCH!" Savannah yelled but at the same time laughed. She picked up the phone from the floor and shook her head.

"Oh hush. You love me."

"Yeah sure." She replied sarcastically, I gave her the puppy look. "You're like a little kid. God damnit."

"I was just bored, everyone's too busy for me."

"Please don't tell me that you're gonna make me play video games with you…" Savannah said, with an ounce of dread in her voice.

"Why does everyone hate playing video games with me?!" I exclaimed and crossed my sun burnt arms. I yelped in pain and closed my eyes.

"Because you always make me play the ones you’re good at, and you always end up beating me. I really think that you cheat."

"I sooo do not! I just have skills!"

"Whatever. I can't though babe, I'm about to go out."

"With who?" I inquired and smirked.

Did she have a date? How awesome would that be! All of us had boyfriends and we were all happy! I was ecstatic for my friend.

"No one you know." Savannah smiled and headed into her bedroom. "Sorry mama, I need to get dressed."

"Alright." I pouted and went to look for Hope, but to my dismay, she was out with my brother. They were like attached at the hip.

I decided to call Justin, so I grabbed my cell phone and headed into my bedroom. I shut the door behind me and dialed his number.

"Hello." Justin answered his phone, sounding a little annoyed.

"Hi baby…You busy?"

"No, but today just won't fucking end."

"Ugh. I know, I'm just so bored. Everyone's too busy for me and did I mention my burn hurts badly?"

"I told you to put on sun block, but you bitched that you wanted to tan."

"Fuck you. I'd rather be red than albino." I replied with a yawn. "I miss you."

"I miss you too. I wish I could be with you right now."

"How much more do you have to work? I'm bored."

"Tommy's got me working all night baby, I'm sorry." Justin stated and l sighed.

"Get out of it please?"

"You know I'm doing this only because I love you."

"I know." I grinned and made a kiss sound into the phone.

"I'll pick you up at 10, okay?"

"Okay bye baby."

"Bye Natalia, I love you."

I hung up the phone and spaced off. I still couldn't shake the feeling he gave me when he said he loved me. I mean it was crazy. He loved me? I just could never stop wondering why.

I grabbed my care bear stuffed animal and hugged it tightly. Love is such a crazy thing. I mean you shouldn't say it if you don't mean it. Did he really mean it?

My cell phone started ringing and I figured it was Justin calling me back. I grabbed the phone and answered it, using a stupid voice to bother him.

"Hello hello?"

"Nat?"

"Uh… who's this?"

"It's Dylan."

WHAT?! What the hell was he doing calling me? How the hell did he have my number?

"Oh… hi." I responded, unsure of what to say to this man. What did he want from me? Was this a ploy to hurt Justin and to get dirt on him?

"How are you?"

"I'm fine…"

"Nat, I was worried about you the other day… you shouldn't be hanging around with someone like Justin. I mean he kidnapped you and he's in the fucking mob."

"You mean someone like you?"

"…What?" I could hear the shock in his voice.

"Yeah, I'm not stupid, Dylan. I know the truth."

"You mean Justin fucking told you, he's afraid of a little competition so he's trying to keep me away from you."

"Dylan, what are you saying? What do you want?" I demanded, pushing my care bear on the other side of the bed and looking down at the floor.

"I just wanna talk to you. Let's go somewhere and have coffee."

"I don't think so."

"Natalia, come on. It's just coffee."

"Fine." I replied, getting very annoyed with Dylan. I really didn't want to see him, but at the same time I wanted to know what he was up to.

Why couldn't things ever be simple?

**

I made my way to a Starbucks in the village, wearing a black baby doll tube top dress. I had on a pair of black sequent high heeled flip-flops and my hair was down and straight.

In a way I knew I was only getting myself into trouble. I shouldn't have gone to see Dylan. I was with Justin and I knew all Dylan was going to do was badmouth him.

I hoped things would go all right, but I seriously doubted that.

Seeing that Dylan was sitting down in the Starbucks, I headed over to him and sat across from him. I half-smiled at him and played with the necklace Justin gave me earlier that year. I had given it back to him, actually thrown it at him. He gave it back to me when things were better between us and I hadn't taken it off since.

"Hey…"

"Natalia, I'm glad you came."

"Yeah, well… I figured I oughta hear you out."

"Good." Dylan replied and sipped his iced latte. He leaned back in his chair and sighed. "He's no good for you, Nat."

"Who are you to tell me who is and isn't good for me? You don't even know me anymore."

"You haven't changed. I still know you, and I know well enough that he's taking advantage of you. You're a sweet gi-"

"Okay… fuck you, because you took advantage of me just as well, so you have no right to say anything. He's been amazing to me."

"I'm sorry I hurt you Natalia, but that was along time ago. I'm just trying to warn you, he doesn't love you. He's just going to throw you to the side as soon as he gets bored of you."

"But you did that too, Dylan. You got bored of me and then made up some dumb ass excuse to dump me so you could go bang other girls freely. I'm happy right now, and I don't need you coming back in my life trying to be my white knight." I said and stared right at him. "I can take care of myself."

"I didn't get bored of you, I just had a lot going on in my life and I needed space. I'm sorry I lied and said the relationship wasn't going anywhere, I didn't want to hurt you." Dylan stated in reply. I rolled my eyes. "Obviously not seeing that you're too blind to see that he kidnapped you and shot your brother, what else could he do to you?"

"I trust him, Dylan, and with him I have no regrets. With you, everything is the opposite."

"Don't think that…"

"Well I do. Now tell me. What are your real motives?"

"Excuse me?"

"Why did you really want to talk? Did the Lopez's force you?"

Dylan looked at me stunned, unable to believe that Justin had told me so much. I decided to add the icing on the cake so I leaned over and smirked.

"Or was it my Uncle Eduardo?"

His mouth almost dropped. I knew he couldn't believe that Justin had been so honest with me. I just smiled innocently and crossed my arms across my chest. I was no fool, and Dylan was finally realizing that.

"Natalia, your Uncle is doing this to protect you…just like I am."

"My Uncle can't protect me, not from Justin or the Ryan's."

"Fine, I understand you don't want to be helped but can I at least be friends with you?"

"You didn't want to be my friend before, what's different now?"

"I just wanna be here for you." Dylan simply replied. "I don't want you out of my life."

"Alright… friends…" I stuck my hand out and shook Dylan's hand. He half smiled at me and I got an eerie feeling in my stomach.

Could I actually trust him? Or in the back of his mind would he always be after Justin? I didn't know what to think, or what to even do anymore.

"I should be going." I got up from my seat and headed to the door. Dylan followed me to my dismay and held the door for me. I headed out the door and he was walking with me. Great. I reached my destination, the subway, and turned to smile at Dylan.

"See ya Nat, stay safe."

"You too Dyl." I leaned over to hug him and give him a kiss on the cheek, when his lips met mine. All the breath was knocked out of my body by this point.

This was no friendly kiss; this was a full on make out session kiss. I pulled away with my eyes widened. I HAD KISSED BACK!

"Later." He simply said and headed down the street.

"No problem. I should go. Later." Ricky hung up the phone and went about making ice cream for Natalia. He just wanted to be his best friend to be happy and he'd do anything for that.

Chapter 30
I woke up the next morning, still sniffling from crying so much the night before. I headed out of Ricky's room where I had spent the night and walked into the kitchen and grabbed a glass of water. My stomach couldn't handle anything else.

"Nat are you alright?" Hope asked from the living room. She and Andrew were sitting next to each other and they seemed so happy. I didn't want to burden them with my problems or let them know a thing about Justin.

"Yeah don't worry about it." I smiled quickly and sipped my water.

"You sure?" Andy looked at me, concerned. "It looks like you've been crying."

I knew I must have looked like hell for my brother to say that. I pictured myself having bags under my eyes and my hair looking terrible. My next stop was a nice hot shower.

"Yeah. I'm fine. You guys worry too much."

"Alright… but if you need anything we're here." Hope replied. She smiled at me and I just nodded.

Walking into the bathroom I locked the door behind me and turned on the hot water. I turned on the CD player and Mariah Carey No 1's was in it. Out of the speakers came "I Still Believe".

I stripped off my clothes and climbed into the shower, singing along with the words. I was beyond depressed and wasn't looking forward to going to work. I had woken up so late that it was already 3 in the afternoon. Within a few hours I was going to have to go to the bar.

Just fucking great.
**
At 6 I arrived at Joey's. The bar was going to pretty empty that night except for the fact that Savannah was going to be working. I was thankful to have her with me.

I wore a three tiered black skirt with a silver brooch on the side. The top was an off the shoulder white lace shirt. It was kind of the uniform we had to wear a black skirt and white shirt. I think Joey just enjoyed seeing us in skirts.

The bar was still relatively quiet. Few people were actually there so Savannah and I decided to have some fun.

I played with the radio and turned on "Hello" by Christina Aguilera. Savannah and I danced past each other. I grabbed her hand and twirled around her. We could be so retarded sometimes.

"If you girls keep that up I may have to higher you as my dancers." Joey winked at us. Savannah and I died laughing. "Better yet you could be my private dancers."

"How bout we give you a rain-check on that offer?" Savannah replied, muffling her laughter.

"Alright but remember the offer is always open." Joey grinned at us and licked his lips. I wanted to gag.

"Oh… okay. Thanks?" I had to walk away because my disgust would have been visible and I didn't need to lose my job along with my boyfriend. Gah! I needed to stop thinking about him.

Ricky told me to just let it go for a while and have some fun. But that's easier said than done.

"Natalia wait!" Joey called after me.

"What?"

"New people at table 7. Go take their order."

I just half smiled at my employer and glanced over at table 7. To my surprise Justin and JC were sitting there. I looked over at Savannah and quickly ran over to her.

"Girl… can you take table 7?"

"Why?" Savannah looked at me oddly. I pushed a strand of wavy hair behind my ear.

"Justin's there."

Savannah quickly looked over at the table in shock. She bit her lip and smirked when she looked. I raised my eyebrow at her and watched her reaction. Savannah seemed happy to see Justin…

But wait. I put two and two together and realized that the one she was looking at was JC. Was Savannah with JC?

"Wait one second… Savannah what's going?"

"What do you mean?" She lied and began to clean off one of the tables.

"You're with JC aren't you…"

"No…"

"Don't lie to me…Are you with JC?" I watched her carefully and she sighed for a moment and closed her eyes.

"Yeah."

"Why didn't you tell me?"

"I didn't want you guys to freak out at me for dating him." She looked down at the floor and I just leaned in and hugged her.

"I wouldn't freak out. I know what you're going through though."

"What?"

My southern best friend looked at me strangely. I half smiled and bit down on my lip. There was no turning back now.

"I was dating Justin for a while."

"Oh my God… I had a feeling!!" Savannah giggled. "But wait… you were?"

"Yeah we broke up last night." I said and scratched behind my head. I didn't want to meet her eyes so I busied myself by helping clear the dirty table of the glasses.

Savannah followed behind me as I handed the glasses back to the bartender. My eyes threatened to drop the salty tears but I forced them back. I wasn't going to let Justin see I was crying.

"What happened?"

"Long story. Lots of drama. After work I'll tell you everything. I just don't want to get emotional in front of him." I stated and looked at her sadly. I was knocked out of my conversation when I heard one of the customers call me.

"Hey girlie! Where's my drink?!" The heavyset man yelled to me. I sighed and grabbed his drink from the bartender.

I headed over to the man and placed his martini on the table. He was fat and balding but I tried my best to be as sweet as possible to him without looking grossed out.

"I'm sorry for the wait… can I get you anything else?"

"How bout your number?" I wanted to die when the man said this to me. He was old enough to be my father. Hell, maybe even grandfather.

"Uhm… I'm sorry but no." I turned around to walk to another table when the man grabbed my ass. My mouth dropped but I immediately saw Joey giving me a look to not be rude.

I wanted to die. I NEEDED MY JOB! But I wanted to SO kick this guy's ass.

"Excuse me sir but can you please take your hands off me?"

"But sweetheart… I have enough money to keep you happy forever." The big man pulled me onto his lap and I struggled against him.

"I don't want your money just stop!"

Justin was walking over to our direction and I wanted to kick myself for coming to work at all. He was probably going to gloat or make me feel even more like a whore. I really didn't need this.

"Larry, I think you need to take your hands off her."

Justin knew this guy? What the hell? Okay I was lost. Why was he sticking up for me anyway?

"Timberlake, stay the fuck out of this. It doesn't concern you." Larry rubbed my leg and Justin finally just snapped and grabbed me off Larry's lap.

"It does concern me. Leave her alone and get the hell out of this bar."

"You think you can threaten me? You don't scare me you bastard. You’re nothing but a weakling holding a gun."

"And you're what, 400lbs of weakling holding a gun? Please." Justin rolled his eyes and held me close to him. "Leave the girl alone. I'm warning you. One of your sons is dead already, you don't need another one in the ground, do you?"

"The only one going in the ground is going to be you. But we'll settle this another time." Larry shook his head and winked at me. "Until we meet again, beautiful."

Larry left the club leaving me in shock. Was that the infamous Larry Lopez? The one my Uncle was working for? Jesus Christ…

"We need to talk." Justin said, turning me around to face him.

I didn't know what to say to him. I wanted to curse him out and tell him that I could take care of myself but I knew that was bullshit. He was helping me and I should be grateful. I just despised feeling the way I did. I hated the fact that I wanted to throw myself in his arms and get lost in his warmth.

"Fine…"

We headed into the backroom and Justin shut the door behind him. I fiddled with my bracelet, not wanting to look at him.

"That was Larry Lopez…the mob lord."

"I figured." I said coldly. "What are you doing here?"

"I came to talk to you."

"Why?"

"Because I acted like a real asshole to you and I'm sorry."

"And that's supposed to make everything better? I hate to burst your bubble but things still aren't okay."

"Nat… please."

"I don't want to hurt you anymore. Let's just leave things at that."

"I can't do that… I love you. I love you so much that it hurts." Justin advanced toward me and cupped my face in his hands. "I should have tried harder to understand you instead of not even listening to you."

"But I messed up… okay. I did the one thing I promised myself that I would never do. I cheated."

"You didn't cheat…Ricky told me the story."

"Ricky?" I raised my eyebrow curiously. "When was this?"

"He called me last night. I was just as surprised as you." Justin confessed. I half smiled to myself. I really had the best friend in the world.

"What did he tell you?"
 
Justin stuffed his hands in his pockets. He was almost hesitant for a moment and I couldn't figure out why. I mean it was my story.

"I don't want you to get mad at Ricky if he told me something that you didn't want me to know…"

"It doesn't matter. I understand Ricky was just trying to make me happy again." I said and proceeded to bite down on my lip. Justin just sighed.

"He told me that you and Dylan used to date and he hurt you…"

"That's true."

"Ricky said that Dylan took your virginity and left you a little while after."

"Yeah, two weeks later he broke up with me. He said our relationship wasn't going anywhere." I mocked Dylan's past words with anger and resentment in my voice.

"Scumbag… he said you didn't love him…"

"No. I didn't love him."

"Do you love me?" Justin asked suddenly. I was completely caught off guard with that one.
 
Love… Yes I loved him. I was in love with him. But I couldn't tell him. I was afraid. Thinking about it now, I don't know what I was scared about. Maybe it was just the commitment, or maybe it was just that things had happened so quickly for Justin and me recently.

I didn't think I could say it just yet.

"I'm not sure…I care about you and maybe one day I could…"

"Knowing that one day its possible means the most to me. I love you Natalia… whether you love me back or not. Whether your ready to be loved or not."

I smiled and placed a kiss on Justin's lips. I ran my hand up the back of his head and through his hair. Justin explored the crevices of my mouth, which made me go weak in the knees. I wanted him so badly.

"One second…" I said and pushed away from our passionate kiss. I headed toward the door and locked it shut. "Okay better." I launched myself back into his muscular arms and began kissing him like there was no tomorrow.

"I want you Natalia…" He whispered huskily in my ear. I didn't have to think twice on responding to that one. I smothered his face and neck in kisses.

"Then I'm yours." I replied. Within a second Justin pushed me against the wall and got down on his knees. My panties were tugged down and my leg was lifted over his shoulder. He attacked my pussy with his mouth and my jaw dropped open. I tried to let out a moan or any sort of sound but nothing came out.

In an instant his tongue stabbed into my core and my eyes tightened shut. I slumped back against the wall while Justin's tongue probed in and out of me. I couldn't take it anymore, I began to moan and quite loudly.

"Justin!! Hmm! God!"

His tongue began moving in a circular motion, making me lean my head back against the wall. The sweat was pouring down my body and I wasn't sure how long I was going to be able to hold on.

I thought I was going to die when Justin stopped his motions and watched me. I was panting and I swear I thought I was going to explode. That bastard always knew how to tease me.

"What's wrong baby?" Justin grinned at me. I just shot him a nasty look.

"Baby please!!"

"Please what?"

"Please make me cum!"

He cupped my clit with his mouth after I spoke those words. Justin began to suck on it softly and then brought me to my peak. I began to cum and I just moaned these inaudible phrases.

Justin of course loved it. He looked up at me and smirked after my orgasm had finally passed.

"We're not finished yet baby… wrap your legs around me… come on."

"Justin, I need to get back to work…" I said seriously, of course teasing him. I wanted him inside me but two could play his teasing game.

"Work can wait." He pulled his pants and boxers off in one swift motion, and then held me up by my ass.

"Baby I can't." I started to grin now, I couldn't help it. Justin groaned and pressed his erection against me.

"Natalia… baby… please."

"Nope… " I have no idea how I was keeping my cool because I just wanted to thrust my hips out to meet his. I wanted him inside me.

"Please…I have enough money, you don't need to work…" He was begging me now and I was loving every second of this.

I leaned over and licked his bottom lip sensually, continuing to tease my mobster boyfriend.

"I really should go. I'm sorry." I giggled and purposely pressed my pussy against his dick.

"Fucking tease." He closed his eyes tightly.

"Yeah I get it from you."

"I want you so bad. I'm gonna have blue balls."

I couldn't help but to laugh so hard that I snorted. I don't know why I found this funny but then again I'm weird.

"So that's funny?" Justin finally opened his blue eyes and stared at me. He smirked a little bit when I nodded at him. "Yeah then so is this."

Justin punched his cock into me and my mouth just opened into the perfect "O" form. Justin just smiled deviously and rocked his hips against mine.

"Uhnn… yeah. You feel so good…" Justin moaned, breathing against my neck. I swear I felt like I was gonna cum right there.
 
"You feel even better…" I kissed his lips, tasting myself on his mouth.

"God… I love fucking you. I could do it all day." My boyfriend stated and continued to pound into me. I dug my nails into his back so tightly that I could feel the blood start to drip out. At this point neither of us cared.

"Justin… Justin… Justin… Justin! JUSTIN!" I screamed out. After a while I didn't even know what I was saying. But I could tell by the look on his face he was enjoying my moans and screams of pleasure.

I was lost in another orgasm at that point and Justin's quickly followed mine. Justin filled me up with his warm cum.

"Mmm that's my girl." He kissed me softly and then placed me down on the floor. "Now you can go back to work." I smirked and kissed his nose softly.

"No matter how many annoying and rude people I have to serve tonight, nothing can bring me down after that."

"Good. I'm glad I could make your night special." Justin grinned cockily and then kissed my lips. The two of us dressed and then headed out of the storage room.

Chapter 32
"Justin come on!" I pulled at my boyfriend's arm as he wearily stared at the outside of my house.

"I don't know about this…"

"I really want you to meet her though… please baby?" I stuck my bottom lip out and made the puppy face. I really wanted him to meet my mother. I had made sure to pick a day when my brother wasn't going to be home.

I even knew that my Mother would adore him. Justin hadn't thought so but I just knew she would. My Mom had no idea of course that Justin was my kidnapper. All she knew was that he was a boy I liked. She couldn't wait to meet him.

"You're so lucky that I love you." Justin shook his head and I placed a lingering kiss on his soft lips
.
"I know I am." I ran up the steps to my house and rang the bell. Justin stood behind me with a nervous look on his face. I held his hand tightly and shot him a half smile.

That's when my Mother opened the door. The first thing she did was grab me into this tight hug.

"Natalia mijita! You never call or visit anymore! I miss you." Isabel Fuentes-Kirkland said through her heavy Spanish accent.

"I'm sorry, Mami. I've been busy." I half smiled at my Mom and motioned to Justin. "Mami, this is my boyfriend, Justin."

The minute my Mother set eyes on him, she smiled. The tiny Hispanic woman pulled him into a hug and kissed his cheek.

"Que hombre mas guapo." She pinched his cheeks and smiled. "Come inside… I was just cooking but it's going to take some time till it's ready."

Justin and I headed inside the house. He was looking around at all the baby pictures of Andy and me with a smile on his face.

"Thank you for having me over Mrs…"

"No please… call me Isabel." She smiled and led the way toward our living room. "Have a seat."

Justin and I sat down on the couch while she sat down on the love seat. She grinned at the both of us.

"We'll have more time to get aquatinted during dinner… pero… ah… would you like to see Natalia when she was a baby?"

"MAMI! No!" I covered my face in my hands while Justin started to laugh.

"I'd love to."

She ran to the VCR and popped in video after video. The first one was of my first birthday. I cringed a little when I saw my father in the video. My mom just had to make sure to point him out.

"That's Natalia and Andrew's father… ese maldito." She cursed, probably assuming that Justin didn't speak Spanish. "Look how adorable she was."

"You mean is!" I replied and she laughed.

"If I could go back and keep you and your brother that age I would."

The tape ended and she put the next one in. My Senior Prom video. I quickly covered my mouth and wanted to scream.

"Oh my God… please do not put that on!!" I begged.

"Why what's this one?" Justin asked, obviously confused.

"Her Senior Prom video." My Mom smiled as the picture came up on the screen. She quickly walked to the kitchen to check on the food and left us watching the screen.

I hated myself in high school. It was just a time of my life that I wish I could forget. But prom was the only night I didn't ever want to forget. I had so much fun and I had to admit I looked really pretty.

It was just embarrassing because I was different then. I was naïve, and ditzy. I guess I'm a completely different person now.

"You look so beautiful." Justin turned and smiled at me. "I wish I could have known you then."

"You wouldn't have wanted to. I was so naïve and just plain street stupid." I sighed and covered my face with my hands.

"You were innocent. Hard to believe but I was like that at one time too." He said with a smile. I rolled my eyes at him and kissed his cheek.

"I kinda figured that one."

"I like your Mom. She's really cool."

"Yeah and she's annoying too." I rolled my eyes and smiled. "But I love my Mom. She's always there for me and even if she disagrees with me about something, she'll be stubborn about it, but eventually listen."

"Yeah, she seems pretty tough too."

"That she is. She can be pretty scary when she wants to."

"I guess I see where you get it from." Justin joked and poked me in the side. I looked up at him and glared.

"That's not funny!"

"Yes it is! You’re doing it now!" Justin laughed and I proceeded to tickle him like crazy. That was when my Mom called us into the kitchen to eat.

I was so glad to see my Mom and Justin getting along so well. My Mom told me later on that she really liked him. She said he seemed like he really cared about me. I knew I had to tell him how I felt.

Better now than later.

**
Hope was pacing back in forth in her room. She couldn't believe that she was playing both fields. She was going back and forth to Tommy and Andrew, unable to choose which one she wanted to be with.

She knew she was wrong, and in the end she could loose the both of them for good.

Anyway, it wasn't like she could ask for advice from her friends. If either of them knew that she was back with Tommy they would be so ashamed of her.

Andrew was also a great guy and Natalia's brother. She wouldn't want her friend to hate her for playing her brother, even though it wasn't intentional.

The brown haired Spanish beauty had no idea what to do. She didn't know who to choose and who to throw to the side.

Hope and Tommy had a huge history together and she didn't want to let him go because she knew she'd always love him. But at the same time she cared for Andrew and didn't want to hurt him either. She had a feeling that things could be so great between the both of them if they tried.

Things with Andrew were new and she liked the feeling he gave her. But then again he was nothing like Tommy…

She knew she needed to decide what to do… and fast.

Chapter 33
It was the first time that Justin was in my apartment. The two of us were cuddling on my bed and watching Scarface on my TV. It was funny how that was my favorite movie and my boyfriend was actually living the life of Tony Montana.

I snickered a little at the thought of being Justin's Elvira.

"What's so funny?" Justin looked at me with a half smile.

"Nothing…it's just this movie is so you."

My boyfriend rolled his eyes at me and laughed. I hated to say it but the whole Mafia thing had become a turn on for me.

"You need help baby."

"Be quiet, Tony." I smirked at my boyfriend.

He pushed me back on the bed and started tickling me. I couldn't hold myself back. I was laughing like crazy with tears coming out my eyes.

"STOP!!" I begged through laughter.

"Nope." He replied with a grin and continued to tickle me.

"Please?!" I begged and he finally listened and collapsed next to me. I smiled at my gorgeous boyfriend and leaned over and kissed his soft lips.

I smiled and placed my hand on the nape of his neck. Our kisses became deeper and more urgent. That was when I heard a bang. I assumed it was the tv so I ignored it and continued to kiss my boyfriend.

I pushed my hand down the front of his pants and rubbed his length. My boyfriend moaned through the kiss and I couldn't help but to giggle.

"I love you Natalia…" he moaned and kissed at my neck.

"I lo-.."

"What the fuck is going on here?!" I looked up to see my brother Andrew standing in the doorway.

I quickly pulled my hand out of his pants and began to stutter. My brother had walked in on me and my boyfriend messing around. JESUS! He hated Justin and I knew he was going to freak out.

"Andrew… I…"

My brother reached into his pocket and pulled a gun out. My mouth dropped and I just stared at him dumbstruck.

"You… you fucking dirty bastard. Get the fuck off my sister’s bed… NOW!"

I turned to look at Justin and he just nodded at me. He climbed off my bed and stared at my brother.

"Take it easy, man…"

"Like hell I'm gonna take it easy." My brother picked his phone up and dialed a number. "Boys I need you up here now."

"Please, Andy, calm down… don't do anything crazy…" I begged Andrew to stop. But he wouldn't move the position of the gun from Justin's body.

"No… I need to settle something that's been going on for way too fucking long." My brother hissed. With those words, my apartment began to fill with a bunch of men with guns.

"What's going on…? ANDREW!! WHAT'S GOING ON?!" I screamed.

I glanced at my brother who said nothing to me but ordered the guys to grab Justin. My boyfriend kept his composure but I could imagine how scared he was.

"Please don't hurt him Andrew!" I lunged to my brother but one of the men with guns grabbed me and held me tightly.

"Don't move." The man whispered to me.

I just stood horrified and watched the events unfold in front of me. I tried to pull away from the grip of the man holding me but I couldn't move. I was hoping that they wouldn't kill him, but I felt like I knew nothing. Not even my brother.

Two of the men grabbed Justin and another started beating him. He was punched in the stomach over and over again. Justin closed his eyes in pain and began to cough violently.

"No boys. Stand back. I want a shot at him." My brother said coldly and made his way over to Justin.

Andrew pistol-whipped Justin across the face. Justin winced in pain but still managed to keep it together. Tears fell from my eyes for my boyfriend.

"Andrew please stop!" My pleas went on unheard. My brother continued his attack on my boyfriend. I struggled against the grip of the man holding me.

Andrew put on brass knuckles and stared at Justin. Justin was keeled over and panting for air.

"This is for putting my family through hell for a month and a half." My brother raised his fist and knocked Justin in the face. "This is for shooting me and kidnapping my sister."

Again Andrew punched Justin. Blood started to trickle down his face and my mouth dropped in horror. I didn't want to watch this anymore. I kicked at the man holding me but he still wouldn't let go.

Andy punched him again and again and then finally gave him a swift kick in the balls. Justin groaned in pain and fell to his knees.

"Pick him up and bring him outside." My brother ordered. "I'm going to finish this once and for all."

"ANDREW!! YOU CAN'T DO WHAT I THINK YOU’RE GOING TO DO!" I screamed at the top of my lungs.

Andrew was going to kill Justin. I just had this feeling in the put of my stomach and I knew I had to stop it in any way possible.

"Natalia, just shut the fuck up and don't move from this room." Andrew glared at me. "Dylan, stay in here and watch her."

My ex-boyfriend walked into my bedroom and smirked at me. Everything just came together at that point. My Uncle wasn't the only one working for the Lopez's, my brother was too.

The men dragged Justin out of the room and the door was shut behind them. The man holding me let me go and Dylan stood by the door.

"You asshole." I glared at Dylan. "This whole time you and my brother were conspiring against Justin…"

"We were watching out for you, Nat. He's dangerous."

"AND SO ARE THE BOTH OF YOU!!" I had to get out of there fast and save Justin. My mind was moving a million miles a second. There had to be some way…

"We care about you and we're doing this to keep you out of harms way."

"I WAS FINE ON MY OWN AND I WAS HAPPY! You guys came along and are trying to ruin everything good I had going for me!"

"He was going to use you and throw you away…"

"Just like you did, right Dylan?"

It suddenly hit me. Justin's gun was in my nightstand. I walked over to my bed, forcing the tears out. I had this great gift of being able to cry on demand.

"I need a tissue…" I said through fake sobs. I opened the drawer and pulled the gun out. I quickly turned and pointed it at Dylan and the guard in the room. "You're going to open the door for me now and stay up here…"

"Nat, stop fucking around and put the gun down."

I cocked the gun and shot the guard in the arm. He began to scream and I turned and looked at Dylan.

"One good thing I learned from Justin was how to shoot a gun." I smirked. "Now if you don't want to get shot I suggest you open the door… NOW!"

Dylan opened the door and I smiled graciously at him. I walked right over to him and gave him a kick in the crotch. He fell down to his knees and I just laughed.

"God that felt so good."

I stormed out of my bedroom and grabbed my cell phone off the kitchen counter. I quickly dialed Savannah and she answered on the second ring.

"Savannah, I can't talk but I need you to get in touch with JC and tell him that Justin's in trouble." I stated and ran out of the apartment.

"What happened?"

"My brother's working for Larry Lopez and he's trying to kill Justin. Just get JC and Tommy to get to my house as fast as you can." I hung up the phone and flew down the stairs of my building.

Where the hell could they have taken Justin?!

I made my way down to the garage to get in my car when I saw a big group of people. In the middle of the group was Justin, getting beaten again and again with a metal rod.

I stared in horror and watched as my brother finally stopped the beating. Justin was lying on the floor bloody and bruised; I couldn’t imagine the pain he must have been in. It was killing me to watch.

"I can take it from here. Go watch for any cops or any witnesses. I'm going to finish this by myself."

The henchmen scattered away and I quickly crept toward Justin and Andrew.

"You shamed my family. You robbed my Uncle, kidnapped my sister, shot me, stalked my sister and fucked her." Andy aimed the gun at my boyfriend and glared at him. "But now it's the end of it all."

"I…I love… Natalia…" Justin said weakly from his position on the floor.

"Like hell you do."

"Andrew stop it." I made my way over, holding Justin's gun in my hand. "You’re acting really fucking psychotic Andrew."

"I'm not acting psychotic… I'm doing something that needs to be done."

I ran to Justin, holding the gun in Andrew's direction. I started to cry when I saw my boyfriend lying on the floor in pool of his own blood. I didn’t want to touch him, he just looked so frail and weak.

"Leave him alone Andrew!! I'm warning you!"

"I can't do that, Nat." Andrew smiled insanely at me, and shot at my boyfriend twice. I screamed and watched in horror as Justin was shot in the stomach and chest.

"NO!!!"

I didn't know what I was doing. I was just so stricken with anger and pain; I started shooting at my brother, making him run.

"Justin… baby talk to me…" I looked down at my boyfriend and saw him shaking.

"Nat…"

"I'm here baby…" Tears pooled in my eyes and my boyfriend smiled at me.

"You're so… beautiful…" He was struggling to say the words and it pained me to watch.

"Shh… " I ran my hand down his face and smiled, trying my best to be strong for him. I pulled my cell phone out of my pocket and immediately dialed 911.

"Nat… I'm… dying…"

"No you're not. Don't say that, Justin. You’re gonna be fine." I stroked his face and leaned down to kiss his bloody lips.

"I can die happy… because I have my angel with me…" He closed his eyes and I started to panic. He couldn't die. He couldn't leave me.

I didn't want to live without him in my life.

"Justin baby please… open your eyes!!" He half opened his eyes and smiled at me. "I love you Justin… I always have…"

"I know… I knew you did when we first made love…" He coughed violently and I held onto him, my tears spilling out onto the floor. "I've… always known…"

"Please don't leave me… I don't want to live without you."

"I'll try angel…"

The paramedics sped into the garage and pushed me out of the way. They pulled Justin into the ambulance hooking him up to machines. Thankfully JC, Savannah, Hope and Tommy all showed up.

They pulled me into their car while I was crying and shaking and took me to the hospital with them. I don't really remember what they said to me or what happened on the way there.

The only thought that crossed my mind was that I could lose Justin forever.

Chapter 34
I was sitting in the waiting room with JC, Savannah, Tommy and Hope. As it turns out, Hope and Tommy had been seeing each other. I was glad that Hope had cheated on Andrew. I was so fucking ecstatic. Maybe it would hurt him, even if it was the tiniest bit.

I wanted him to pay for ruining everything in my life.

"He's gonna be okay don't worry." JC put his hand on my shoulder and smiled reassuringly at me.

"I hope so…"

"He will be. We have the best doctors working on him." Tommy stood in front of me. "It's not your fault. I want you to remember that okay?"

I couldn't believe how nice these two men were being to me. After all this time they proved themselves to be actually human beings with feelings. I was shocked at how far all of us had come.

I actually considered JC and Tommy my friends now, not my kidnappers or people I feared, but friends.

"Thanks Tommy. I'll try." I smiled at him and wiped the tears away from my eyes. I had to be strong right now. I couldn't cry. I had to show that I knew everything was going to be all right.

Hours passed and we heard nothing. I hoped that it was a good thing. That maybe Justin was pulling through and they were just waiting for him to recover a little more.

I laid my head on Savannah's shoulder and she ran her hand through my hair. I wondered if the police had caught my brother. I wondered what was to become of my Mother when she learned the truth. Her son was nothing but a killer. Not the prestigious med-school student that she was so proud of.

I wanted the police to lock my brother up forever, along with Larry Lopez, Dylan and anyone else who wanted to bring harm to Justin. He was the light in my life and I didn't want to loose him.

I wanted to marry him, have children with him and grow old together. I wanted him to be in my life forever, protecting me and loving me in the way that only he could.

My tear stricken eyes stung and I wiped the tears away. I couldn't stand waiting anymore. I wished that we could just hear the news already.

I spoke too soon when I said that because Joseph Ryan came into the waiting room. His face was stone cold, without emotion or anything.

"I found out news about Justin."

I stood up and stared at the man. He wasn't upset or anything so I figured it would be okay.

"Is he alright?" I asked, shakily holding onto the arm of the chair.

"He's dead."

If you asked me what happened next, I couldn't tell you. Everything just blacked out for me. I was told later on that I fainted from shock.

**
Joseph Ryan stood outside of Natalia's hospital room. He hated the girl and her entire family. They were a nuisance, but that would be no more.

"Are you a relative of Miss Fuentes?"

"Yes of course." The Irish man sneered and pushed a roll of hundreds at the doctor. The doctor pocketed them and stared at the man.

"She's fine and healthy. So is her child."

"Child?" Joseph asked incredulously.

"She's pregnant."

"With Justin's child no less…" The Irish mob lord shook his head, thinking for a moment. "Abort it."

"Sir… I can't do that. There has to be consent of the woman…"

"Abort the pregnancy."

Another roll of money was handed to the doctor. He stared down at it and then back at Joseph. The doctor just nodded and went about prepping for the abortion.

Joseph Ryan just smiled to himself and headed into Justin's hospital room. He had been asking for Natalia, and Joseph had "gone" to look for her.

"Where is she?" Justin asked. He was tied up to IV's and a breathing machine.

Lucky for him there was no permanent damage. A few broken ribs, a ruptured artery, a significant amount of blood loss and a broken arm. Justin would recover quickly.

"She left."

"Where'd she go? Call her… I really want her with me."

"Natalia isn't coming back Justin."

"Is she okay?" The blue eyed man questioned nervously. He struggled to get out of his bed but Joseph pushed him back down.

"She ran away with her family. They're in hiding right now."

"What?! Why? NO! You have to find her!"

"Justin calm down…she left you a note…" Joseph reached into his pocket and pulled out a piece of paper.

Justin grabbed the paper from Joseph's hands and went about reading it to himself.

"Justin,
I'm sorry to have to do this in a letter, but it's the only way I can. It's over. I've realized that my family is more important than anything and their safety is imperative. Being with you would be a liability for them. I hope you understand. Thank you for the fun in the last few months. Take care of yourself. I know you will find happiness one day.
Thanks, Natalia."

Tears filled up in Justin's eyes and he looked away from the paper. Fun? She called their relationship, fun? How could she be so heartless…

But at the same time he understood. It was her family that she was protecting… but if she only knew that he would never bring harm to them. Even Andrew who tried to kill him.

"She left it in her apartment… I'm sorry Justin…"

"I want you to try and find her… please Joseph." Justin turned to look at Tommy's father. His face full of pain and heartbreak.

Lani walked into Justin's room and placed a kiss on his cheek.

"Feelin' any better, hun?" She asked sweetly. Justin just shook his head at Joseph Ryan's fiancé. "Well you try to get better. I need to talk to Joseph."

Joseph and Lani walked out of the room leaving Justin to cry himself to sleep.

**
I woke up with the urge to throw up. I sat up in bed and raised my hand to my forehead. Ricky immediately walked in looking at me solemnly.

"What happened?" I asked and rubbed my temples.

Ricky said nothing, but sat on the edge of my hospital bed. He took my hand in his and smiled at me. I cocked my eyebrow at my best friend

"Ricky what the hell is going on?"

"Baby girl, do you remember anything?"

"Not really…"

"Think… what was the last thing you remember…"

I scratched my head, trying to think. I remembered waiting in the hospital to find out news about Justin…

Then it hit me… Justin was dead.

My eyes welled up with tears and I started to sob uncontrollably. I latched onto Ricky in the tightest hug.

"I remember that Justin died…" My tears poured all over my best friend’s shirt. He rubbed my back and held me close to him.

"It's okay to cry…"

"I want him back, Rick… I want him back with me."

My best friend didn't know to say. He just rocked me back and forth in his arms. That was when the doctor walked in. My head was in a tizzy and I just wanted to crawl back into bed and sleep forever.

"Miss Fuentes, how are you feeling?"

"I'm okay… I feel a little nauseous…"

"That's normal though… loosing a child can have those after affects. The bleeding will subside as well after a few days."

"Loosing a child…?"

"Oh… you didn't know…" The Doctor stared at me. "You were pregnant and last night you miscarried…"

I started to sob again and Ricky just held me. I couldn't save Justin and I couldn't save my own child. I was worthless.

"Miss Fuentes, we just have to run some tests to make sure everything is alright and then we can let you out…"

I just nodded, not sure what was happening to me. Everything was just moving so fast that I was just left with confusion.

My life was ruined.

Chapter 35
Months passed and things still stayed the same. I was still lost without Justin, but I was starting to be able to function. I went to school, hung out with my friends, but on the inside, I felt dead without Justin.

Tommy and Hope moved back to Florida where they married. Hope and I kept in touch still, but every time she spoke to me, it would be for a short time. In a way I felt that she didn't want to talk to me because I was a reminder of Andrew, her past that she wished to forget.

Savannah and JC were still here. JC was stationed here to watch the Lopez's and make sure they didn't do anything crazy. JC and I had become close and shared in each other's grief. Justin was his best friend and he missed him.

Savannah was now on Broadway, staring in Beauty and the Beast. I was so proud of her because she was living out her dream. The two of them were also living together now. I was happy but at the same time jealous that I couldn't feel the way they did anymore.

My happiness seemed so far away now.

I was heading into my junior year of college that January. I had finally decided that I was going to go into writing. First I was going to start off at a magazine and eventually write a book about everything that happened to me.

As it turns out, I had shot Andrew and the police caught him. My mother was hurt with the both of us, especially Andrew. She was still speaking to me, but not Andrew or my Uncle Eduardo.

Eduardo was on the run. He left his family and was currently in one of the Lopez's safe houses. That bastard.

I was sitting in my pajamas and typing an essay on my laptop. Ricky was busy getting dressed and yelling at me to do the same but I ignored him.

He wanted me to go out to some Christmas party. I really didn't want to do anything. I had this paper to write for a final and I just wanted to be left alone.

"Nat! GET DRESSED!"

"Shut up!!" I yelled after him. "I'm not getting dressed!"

"Then I guess you're going in your pajamas." My best friend walked into my bedroom where Wildboyz was playing on TV.

"I really don't feel like going to some stupid party." I continued to type away, not bothering to look up at my friend. I laughed a bit when I glanced up to see Chris Pontius making out with a Kinkajou, this adorable little animal. What made me laugh harder was when the animal licked his nipple.

"But you'd rather stay home and watch Wildboyz?"

"Yes that's right."

"You need to stop doing this to yourself. You never go out and you lock yourself in your room. Girl, you need to step out for a change."

"I don't want to step out! I just want to be left alone!"

Ricky sat down on my bed and snapped my lap top shut. I looked up at him angrily and he just shook his head at me and placed his hands on my shoulders.

"You need to move on, Nat… it's time."

"Ricky, you don't understand. I love him…"

"He's dead Natalia. He's been dead for almost 5 months now. You can't punish yourself. He wouldn't want that."

"Justin means everything to me…"

"Honey, stop referring to him like he's still alive. He isn't." Ricky grabbed my hands. "I'm worried about you. You’re not yourself anymore."

"I know that Justin is dead… I just feel like maybe if I convince myself that he’s still alive that he actually will be again." I closed my eyes and took a deep breath.

"Just come out tonight and you'll have fun… I promise. It'll take your mind off everything."

"Alright… but if I want to leave early then I'm leaving."

"Fine…now come on and get dressed."

**
Ricky, Louis and I went to the party. I felt kind of like the third wheel. I mean I loved hanging out with them but I still felt like the odd one out.

I pushed a strand of hair out of my face as I sat alone at the Christmas party. The party belonged to Kayla, and every so often she and Mitch would walk over to me and tell me to have fun.

I sometimes felt like everyone was staring at me, like they all knew about what happened to me. It made me feel naked.

I sipped a sex on the beach in the corner while everyone talked and laughed. God, I wanted to go home.

"Hey Nat!" Savannah called out and walked over to me. She was beaming, always so happy. I was envious of her. Then again, I was envious of anyone who got to be with the person they were in love with.

"Hey guys." I smiled at them.

It was funny, recently someone told me that when I smiled, it never reached my eyes. You could see that it was fake, and how on the inside I was in pain. The eyes really are the windows to the soul.

"Having fun?" JC smiled and gave me a kiss on the cheek. Savannah did the same.

"Not at all. I was hoping the liquor would help."

"Give it some time to kick in." JC laughed.

"But then again, me and C are here so you have to have a good time."

"I guess." I smirked at them. Savannah smacked my arm lightly.

The three of us went about talking and joking around. What we didn't realize was that someone was watching us.

A man walked up behind me a tapped me on the shoulder. I turned around and came face to face with a guy who was about my height. He was really tan with brown hair. He was smiling at me and I looked at him confused.

"Hi…"

"Hey… Do I know you?"

"No, I'm a friend of Hollie's. My names Billy, I was wondering if maybe you wanted to go have a drink with me sometime?" Billy asked. I quickly started to play with the necklace Justin gave me.

"I'm sorry I'm taken…" Was the first thing that blurted out of my mouth; Savannah and JC stared at me in shock.

I mean this guy was good looking and seemed really nice. I couldn't even believe that I was turning him down. But I knew I wasn't ready to date again.

"Oh… I'm sorry." Billy backed off and headed to the other side of the room.

"I can't believe you just did that."

"Listen, do not fucking lecture me. I just got one from Ricky not too long ago and I don't wanna hear it."

"Natalia. You need to stop. Justin wouldn't want you to live your life like this…" JC said. I rolled my eyes at him.
 
"I'm Justin's girl and I will always be. I don't care if he's dead. He's the only man I've ever loved and the only man I want to love."

I couldn't stay there anymore. I grabbed my purse and pulled on my jacket. I headed for the doorway and tread down the snow covered street. I didn't know where I was going.

It was like my feet were moving and my body was just following along. I stopped in front of the hotel Justin took up residence in for that long time and started to bawl.

Everything reminded me of. Everyone reminded me of him.

I couldn't do this anymore. Everyone was right, JC, Savannah, Ricky… everything they said to me about getting over Justin and moving on was right.

I needed to find my peace.

I forced myself to stop crying and looking like a crazy woman as I walked down the street. There had to be a way to find peace with Justin's death. There had to be a way I could let go without forgetting him completely.

That's when it hit me. I never got to go to Justin's funeral. What I had to do was visit his grave. Make peace with him in that way.

I had I to go back to Florida.

Chapter 37
Justin was on his way out of the mansion, Joseph had quickly sent him away, saying there was a problem with one of the shipments of cocaine. It was possible that Larry Lopez was trying to cause trouble so Justin hurried to his car.

When he reached his car he stopped dead in his tracks at the sight of a beautiful brunette outside the gate. She wore white and looked like an angel…

The woman looked just like Natalia. But it couldn't be her… she was in hiding with her family and she made it clear that she didn't want him.

The girl started to walk to a car and Justin instinctively knew that he couldn't let her get away. He climbed into his GTO and revived the engine. "Boiler" by Limp Bizkit blasted through his speakers.

He stepped on the gas and down the path he sped. The gate to the mansion opened up and Justin's car flew out. The car the supposed Natalia was in wasn't too far away.

What began to scare him even more was that the car was JC's. He could tell by the license plate, which read 'ADLIDAS', the name of his favorite song. Could JC have been with Natalia all this time? What the fuck was going on?

Justin sped up until he was neck and neck with the storm gray BMW next to him. Justin lowered his tinted windows slightly and honked the horn.

"PULL OVER!" He yelled, glancing over at the passengers in the car next to him. It was in fact Natalia and her best friend Ricky.

Justin's heart broke when he saw that his angel had been crying. All the anger he had toward her disappeared. What scared him even more was the fact that Natalia looked very sickly.

What exactly had been going on?

Ricky pulled the car over to the side of the road and got out of the car. Natalia just turned around and watched as Justin pulled over behind them.

"Is there a problem?" Ricky asked and walked over to Justin's red GTO. Natalia shakily got out of the car and raised an eyebrow. She was worried and looked like she wanted to protect Ricky.

Justin shut the engine off of his car and climbed out.

**
Someone had been following us. Ricky and I had no clue who it was, being that the windows were darkly tinted. All we knew was that it was a man. I hoped that it was Tommy or something. How crazy is that, I wanted it to be Tommy. That was a complete 180 of how I would have felt a year earlier.

Ricky pulled over to the side of the road and got out of the car. He told me to wait inside but when am I to listen? Besides that I wasn't going to let someone else that I love die.

I crossed my arms and leaned against the car. The door to the red car opened up and out came a man. My hand clamped over my mouth when I realized who it was. The love of my life was alive. JUSTIN WAS ALIVE!

I guess it was too much for me to handle because I blacked out for a minute. Ricky ran over and grabbed me before I hit the ground.

When I came to Ricky was kneeling over me. He ran his hand through my hair and smiled warmly at me.

"You alright?"

"Yeah." I rubbed my head and started to stand up.

"Easy baby…there's no hurry." A voice said from behind me. I finally realized that I had been lying with my head on someone's lap. I turned around to see what had shocked me so much before. The love of my life was very much alive and I was in his arms, where I belonged.

"You’re not dead…" Was all I could get out. I stared at him, my eyes clouding up with tears.

"No…" Justin looked at me oddly.

This had to be a dream. I mean many times I dreamt of this scenario, Justin would come back for me and everything would be perfect. Why was my head playing such games with me?

"Aren't you supposed to be in hiding?" Justin looked at me coldly. "And what are you doing here? In the letter you said you didn't want to be with me anymore."

"What letter?"

"You wrote me a letter and told me that your family was more important than me."

"Uhm…Justin, my brother is in prison and my Uncle is in hiding. The only family I have left is my Mom and she's not too thrilled with me right now. I've been back home…"

"This whole time…someone's been fucking around. The Lopez's maybe…"

"I hate to step in here… but Joseph Ryan was the one that told everyone you died…" Ricky spoke up. He had started to move away from us, wanting to give us our space I suppose.

"But he wouldn't do that… Joseph is like a father to me…"

"He did though." I refused to let go of Justin. My arms were wrapped securely around his neck and my head rested on his chest.

"I just can't understand why…I mean first he helped me to find you and then he wanted us separated?"

"Wait a second…does this mean Tommy and Hope knew the whole time too?"

"I can't fucking believe this." Justin held onto me tightly and climbed to his feet. "I thought Tommy and Hope were my best friends…"

"What about JC and Savannah? Did they know too?" Ricky wondered. I wanted to throw up. I couldn't believe that all this time I had been lied to.

"I haven't spoken to either of them, so I wouldn't know." Justin said simply.

"What are we going to do?" I looked back and forth at Ricky and Justin. Ricky said nothing and Justin just stood quiet for a moment, processing all the information.

"We tell them nothing. As far as they know…we're all clueless to the truth." Justin stated, I just nodded at him.
"Rick, make up a lie to where she is. She's coming with me for the rest of the day."

"Will do. Be careful."

**
After getting in the car with Justin, I practically threw myself at him and kissed him. He kissed back with the same urgency that I had but pulled away.

"Wait… let me take you to my place…okay?"

I nodded and the car sped off down the road. About 15 minutes later, we reached Justin's beautiful mansion. I was shocked when I saw it but I should have expected something to lavish and beautiful. Justin smiled at my reaction and pulled into his garage.

He helped me out of the car and we moved inside his house. We settled on the couch where I curled up in his arms.

"I missed you so much." He placed a kiss on my lips and I smiled. "I thought I really wasn't going to get you back."

"I know… I refused to let go of you though…"

"Same here. My life was just so empty…"

"Justin…"

"What's wrong baby?"

I sat up and looked at my boyfriend. How was I supposed to go about telling him that I lost his child? I took a deep breath and sighed.

"I was pregnant…"

"Was…?" Justin's face paled. "What happened?"

"When they told me you died… I lost the baby…"
 
"Nat… oh my God." Justin sat up and hugged me tightly. "I'm sorry I couldn't have been there for you baby…"

"I understand."

"We'll try for another baby… okay? But this time we'll do it right…"

"What are you saying?" I looked at Justin confused.

"Marry me."

"Justin, baby do you know what you're saying?" I wanted to so desperately say yes but I always had to be practical. Damn me.

"No, baby girl I was going to ask you this a few months back but I never got the chance… now I have it and I'm not going to let it slip away. I want to spend the rest of my life with you Natalia Fuentes. I love you."

What else could I say? The man I loved with all my heart proposed to me. I had been beyond upset that I couldn't be with him these last months. I mean my life was a living hell.

I had to take advantage of my second chance and live my life to the fullest. I didn't give it a second thought because I knew what I wanted. I smiled at Justin and kissed him passionately.

He wrapped his arms around me tightly and we pulled away from the kiss. I smiled, feeling the happiest I have been in months.
"Let's go do it now."

"Now… baby are you sure?"
"Definitely… are you?" Justin stared into my eyes and I melted.
I wanted to be his wife. I never wanted so spend another moment of my life away from him. I wanted to be Mrs. Natalia Timberlake.

"Yes… I want to get married."

Justin was beaming. He kissed me softly on the lips. My eyes started to water slightly and he ran a hand down my cheek.

"Come on, angel. Let's get married." He took my hand and helped me up off the couch. We headed outside to one of his many cars.

He picked his silver Mercedes SLK320. I got in the passenger's side and he got into the driver's side. Justin leaned over and gave me a quick kiss.

The car started and the two of us headed down the street. Justin told me that there was one of those 24-hour wedding chapels. It didn't bother me that I wasn't going to have my dream wedding because I knew there was always later on.

In a short while, I'd be married. That's all that mattered.

Chapter 38
I nervously sat in the dressing room, waiting for the ceremony to begin. I clutched my bouquet of white orchids, pink roses and baby's breath. I wore a matching orchid in my hair and a short veil over my eyes. I kept on my same white halter dress, and even though everything was simple, it was beautiful.

I stood up and looked at my reflection in the mirror. I couldn't believe that these were my last moments as a single woman. It was crazy that I was going to be married by the end of the night.

"Miss… the ceremony is starting…" I turned around to come face to face with a woman standing in the doorway. She just smiled warmly at me. I returned the smile and headed toward the door.

I followed her to two giant white doors. I heard the music start to play and the doors opened up.

The whole room was filled with the most gorgeous flowers. Everything was white and the motif seemed like heaven. I should have guessed because Justin had this thing with heaven. He always said that I was his angel. What shocked me was how nice everything was; I was expecting to see a fat Elvis standing at the alter but it was actually a priest. I guess I thought this would all just be cheesy but it was cute and I was thankful of that.

I looked over at him and smiled. He was wearing a black sports jacket, a white shirt and black pants. He looked so handsome. I mean we weren't the most traditional wedding, but it felt perfect to me.

What made me even happier was that Justin respected my wishes to be married in the eyes of the Roman Catholic Church. Justin is Methodist, but he knew how strongly I felt so he agreed. I smiled to myself and began my descent down the isle.

Tears of happiness fell down my face. When I finally reached Justin he pulled up my veil and stared into my eyes. He traced his hand down my face and I softly kissed his hand.

The priest began the ceremony and softly in the background, "I Swear" by All For One was playing. Justin held my hands tightly and smiled at me. When the priest read my favorite psalm, I was beyond happy. It’s better known as 1 Corinthians 13:4, I’m not a bible freak, I swear, but when that psalm is read at any wedding it gives me chills.

Everything was so perfect.

Then we came to the vows. Justin and I had decided to make our own vows, we thought it made the ceremony more personal.

"Justin Randall Timberlake, since the moment I laid eyes on you, I loved you. I might have been too stubborn to admit it, but I'm not anymore. The best thing that could have ever happened to me was the day you walked into my life and literally swept me away." A smile formed on my face and I continued. "You are a light in my life and I don't want to live another day without you. I will make sure to be the best wife I can be, I will honor you and love you till my dying day."

"I tell you this all the time, but you are my angel. You are a representation of everything good in my life. You make me want to be a better man; you make me want to give up the crazy life I live. I love you Natalia Solana Fuentes. I was lost without you these last few months." Justin started to tear up and that automatically set me off. I wiped the tears away from my eyes and smiled at him. "I promise that I will make your life the happiest. I will love you and cherish you for as long as I live."

We exchanged rings and I was beyond shocked to see the huge rock Justin had for me. It was a band with diamonds encircling it. The size of the diamonds was what shocked me. They had to be at least 2 karats each. The biggest diamond in the center was I don’t even know how big. How the hell could he have gotten it on such short notice?

Justin's was similar but not as huge as mine was. I was completely in love with my ring. I hadn't known he was going to get me such a gorgeous ring.

"By the power invested in me by the state of Florida and the Roman Catholic Church, I pronounce you husband and wife. You may now kiss the bride." The Priest said.

Justin leaned in and kissed me softly. The kiss became deeper and our tongues danced. We pulled away from the kiss and just beamed together.

"I love you Mrs. Justin Timberlake."

"I love you Mr. Justin Timberlake."
**
"Hello?" Ricky answered his cell phone. Justin and I were in the car heading back to his house.

"I'm married!!" I yelled into the phone and giggled. Justin looked over at me and laughed. I couldn't help how giddy I was. I mean I just married the man I was crazy for.

"What?!"

"Don't say anything, Rick… but Justin and I got married."

"Wow… Congratulations. I'm just shocked."

"I know so am I but it just feels so right… you know?"

"I understand…I won't say anything. Just be happy, okay Nat?" I instantly smiled at the approval Ricky was giving us.

"I am happy. Thank you, Rick. Cover for me, okay?"

"No problem." He hung up the phone and I leaned over and placed a kiss on Justin's cheek.

"I love you."

Justin looked over at me and smiled. The look on his face was of pure love.

"I can't wait to get home…"

"And why's that?" I smirked innocently at my new husband. I winked at him and licked my lips.

"Because I can't wait to get my new wife home and make love to her."

I just smiled and leaned back in my seat. Justin beamed at me and then turned his eyes back to the road. We reached the house about 10 minutes later. Justin ran around to my side of the car and picked me up.

"I have to carry the bride over the threshold. It’s tradition." He explained with a smile. I just giggled and clung onto his neck.

We headed into the house and up the winding stairs to the bedroom. As soon as we reached the room, he opened the door and put me down. I smiled and leaned up, placing a kiss on his lips.

Without another word from either of us, Justin unzipped my dress and let it fall to the ground. He beamed when he saw my body and caressed my hips. With a swift motion, he yanked my panties down and reached down between my legs.

Instantly two fingers entered me and I immediately gasped at the feeling I had been aching for. Whenever Justin kissed me or touched me, I felt whole. It had been so long since I had this feeling. My life was perfect now.

My body slumped back against the wall and a silent moan escaped my mouth. Justin leaned in and licked my bottom lip. He then tugged it lightly and I felt my knees buckle.

My husband grinned at me and helped me toward the bed. The back of my knees hit the bed and I immediately fell backwards.

"It's not fair." I pouted. "You have too many clothes on."

He just grinned at me. I sat up and pulled off his dress jacket. Soon after his shirt, pants and boxers were taken off. I grinned at the sight of him and pulled him down to an intense kiss.

Justin climbed onto the bed. I pushed myself farther back on the bed and Justin followed my movements. His mouth didn't leave its position on mine. I continued to enjoy his kiss. He pulled back to my dismay but leaned down and caught my nipple in his mouth.

He sucked on it softly, sending waves on pleasure throughout my body. I ran my hand through his hair and moaned softly. He moved his mouth to my other nipple and continued his erotic motions.

I couldn't believe that 24 hours ago, I thought this man was dead. 24 hours ago I was also single, and now I was married. Life was almost perfect at that moment. I just wished that everyone was going to be able to be able to accept our new found marriage.

But then again that was probably not going to happen. I mean everyone was trying to keep us apart. Everyone had lied to us both.

I just couldn't understand why. I mean we were so damn miserable without each other. Well, it really didn't matter. All that mattered at that moment was that Justin and I were together.

I reached down and stroked his shaft softly. My husband let out a moan and released my nipple from his hot mouth. Justin smirked deviously at me and grabbed a hold of my thighs and pushed them apart. He leaned over me and ran his hand soothingly down my face.

"I'm so happy right now…" Justin smiled at me and placed a soft kiss on my lips. He pushed himself into me and closed his eyes tightly. "You make my life worth living…"

I reached up and ran my hand down his face. Justin immediately opened his eyes and smiled down at me. He kissed my hand softly and began to move his hips.

We were so entranced with each other, his gaze never left my eyes and mine never left his. It felt like our souls were truly connected.

"Mmm… I love you Justin…"I moaned softly. My hips began to move against his and our thrusts became more urgent.

Justin suddenly stopped and pulled out of me. I pouted at him as he stood on the bed on his knees.

"Position change baby doll."

He pulled me up and placed a small kiss on my cheek. Justin then flipped me onto my belly. My knees were bent and my ass was up in the air. I felt so embarrassed and my cheeks started to redden.

I had no idea what he had planned until he thrust his cock back into me. I laid my head on the pillow before me and moaned. He reached to my underside and grabbed at my breasts.

"Oh God…Justin…"

He was directly hitting my g-spot and I knew that within seconds my orgasm would be approaching. Justin's thrusts just seemed to keep speeding up.

I tried to hold my orgasm back for a little longer but I couldn't. I came hard, muffling my moans into the pillow. Justin came after me, moaning my name out. He pulled out of me finally and placed a small kiss on my lips.

"I love you, angel."

"I love you too, J."

Chapter 39
 I climbed through the window of the hotel room we were saying at. Ricky was busily watching Heartbreakers. I smirked and coughed loudly. He shut the TV off and ran over to the window. He helped me in and then pulled me into a tight embrace.

 “Congratulations!”

 “Thanks.” I beamed. “I can hardly believe what happened. It feels like a dream.”

 “Did you figure out what you’re gonna do about Tommy and everyone?” Ricky asked me. I sat down on the bed next to him and laid my head on his shoulder.

 I played around with my wedding band. I was finally happy again. It seemed so unreal to me. I kept imagining this all to be a trick or a dream. I was afraid that I was going to wake up or someone was going to pop out and say that today was a lie.

 I hated the fact that I had to be away from him, but I knew it was for the best.

 “We’re going to act like nothing and then tomorrow we’re going to spring the truth on everyone.”

 “Then what?”

 “I have no fucking clue.” I laughed. “I’m a bit scared actually.”

 “Don’t be. I have your back.”

 “I know. Thanks, Rick.” I hugged my best friend and sighed. Only God knew what would happen tomorrow.

**
 The next day went along as usual. Ricky, JC, Savannah and I went out. We did some shopping. I kept up the ‘I’m so depressed’ attitude. No one suspected that I was actually ecstatic.

 I bought a bunch of clothes, and a few things for Justin on the sneak. I had spoken to him a few times and by 3 I had to get to the Ryan Estate. That wouldn’t be too hard.

 I looked at my cell phone and saw that it was 2:15. It was time to get my ass in gear.

 “Guys…” I called to JC and Savannah who were looking at jewelry. I had a feeling JC was close to proposing to Savannah. I was happy for her but at the same time, I was still pissed off.

 How was I supposed to know if they were trying to keep Justin and me apart? I couldn’t understand why everyone else was entitled to be happy but not us.

 “What’s up Nat? You feeling alright?” JC asked.

 “I really wanna see Hope. Can we go visit her?”

 “Yeah of course. “ Savannah hugged me and smiled. “It’ll be good for you if you do.”

 “I know. I’m really trying.”

 “We know you are.” JC smiled and hugged me as well. “And we’re proud of you.”

 “Thanks guys.” I smiled at the two of them. I looked at Ricky from the corner of my eye. He had no idea what I was planning, but I’m sure he must have thought something.

 We headed to JC’s car and I got in. Justin text messaged me to get there and go to the bathroom. Then he’d tell me when to go in. I responded with a simple okay and leaned my head against Ricky’s shoulder.

 “You need me to stay with you, or are you gonna be okay?” He whispered to me.

 “It’ll be better if you don’t. A lot of shit is gonna go down and I don’t want you to get hurt.”

 “Alright, but if you need me, promise you’ll call.”

 “I promise.” I hugged Ricky and placed a kiss on his cheek.

 I was basically freaking out because I really didn’t know what Justin had planned. I guess I just had to go with the flow. I mean that would be okay right? I just hoped that they wouldn’t hurt Justin in the process.

 Ricky made up some story about how he needed to go to the hotel to call Louis. He said he’d walk and just got out of the car. The three of us headed to the Ryan mansion with a few minutes to spare.

 “I’ll be right with you guys I’m gonna go to the bathroom, ok?” I stated. JC and Savannah just nodded at me.

 I watched as the two of them headed to the living room that everyone was in. I crept behind them, watching everything occur.

 The doors to the living room flew open and there stood Justin, Tommy, Hope and Joseph. They all looked shocked to see JC and Savannah standing there.

 “Oh my God! JUSTIN!” JC ran and hugged him. “I thought you were dead! We all did!”

 “Dead… what are you talking about?” Justin raised his eyebrow. The both of us immediately knew that Savannah and JC had nothing to do with this. “Do you have any idea what he’s talking about Tommy?”

 Tommy just began to stutter. Hope remained quiet and stared at the floor. That’s when Joseph spoke up.

 “We told JC and Savannah you died to protect you. We had to make sure Larry Lopez was out of the way. He still isn’t. He will kill you Justin.”

 “That’s bullshit! Larry knows I’m alive. You’ve made me go up against his men! WHY THE FUCK DID YOU TELL EVERYONE I WAS DEAD?!”

 “It was for your safety.” Joseph said plainly and sipped a glass of water. Joseph had definitely underestimated Justin. My baby is smart!

Justin flung the water out of his hand and glared at the great Joseph Ryan.

 “I don’t need you to protect me.” Justin hissed. “And you lied to Natalia too. The love of my life. You made her think I was dead.”

 “She’s a whore Justin. She wasn’t worth your time. You’re like a son to me and that woman would have brought you nothing but pain.”

 “Seems like you brought me the pain. But let me tell you something. I got married yesterday.”

 “WHAT?! To whom?!” Joseph stood up outraged.

 “Angel, come in here.” Justin called to me. I smiled to myself and flung the doors open.

 “He got married to me.” I held up my left hand showing off my wedding band. “You lied to me, Hope. You too Tommy. I can’t believe you.”

 “You all were supposed to be our friends but you betrayed us. WE DESERVED TO BE HAPPY TOO!!! And now we fucking will.” Justin grabbed my hand and held me close to him. “Fuck the mob. I quit.”

 “You can’t quit. Are you delirious?!” Joseph walked over to us and then backhanded me across the face. “If all it will take is for this whore to die then that’s what will happen.”

 “DON’T EVER TOUCH HER AGAIN!!!” Justin tackled Joseph to the ground. Throwing punch after punch at him. JC and Tommy quickly broke it up and pulled Justin off Joseph.

 I just held my face in shock. I couldn’t believe that this was actually happening. I didn’t think Justin and I were going to live much longer. We couldn’t cross the Ryan’s and live.

 “I did the right thing! I separated you from that Hispanic filth! And I’m glad I had that bastard child aborted!!” Joseph exclaimed.

 The words hit me like a ton of bricks. It was his fault my child was dead. All this time I had been beating myself up over it but it was him.

 “YOU BASTARD!!!” I screamed and launched myself at Joseph. I scratched at his face with my nails, just wanting to kill him so badly. Joseph shoved me to the ground and laughed.

 “Better I killed that child. It didn’t deserve to live… as you don’t.”

 “That’s enough!” Tommy finally stepped in. “Father, I sat back and watched you hurt Justin and Natalia but I can’t do this anymore. You’re wrong!”

 “How dare you defy me boy. I started this business and if you don’t like the way I do my work you can move out of the streets with your whore.” Joseph spat at his son.

 That was when Justin was getting fed up; he first helped me up from the floor after JC finally released him, and placed a small kiss on my lips. My husband pulled a gun out and grabbed Joseph by the collar.

 “You separated me and the love of my life and you killed my unborn child. YOU DESERVE TO DIE!!!!!”

 “Justin wait.” Tommy said and pulled out his own gun. “Let me take care of this.”

 Justin exchanged glances with Tommy and just nodded. He backed up to me and pulled me into his arms.

 “I’m sick of you, father. I’m sick of you calling me incompetent to running the business, I’m sick of you hurting Justin and Natalia, I’m sick of you calling my fiancé a whore and I’m sick of you belittling me. You were never a father to me.” Tommy cocked his gun and just blinked, a tear fell from his eye. “I hate you.”

 BOOM! The gun went off and Joseph was hit in the forehead. He fell to the floor, he was dead but his body still writhed on the floor. I looked away, wanting to vomit from the sight of the corpse.

 “It’s finally over. No more lies, no more pain…” Tommy stood over Joseph’s body. “This is the way it needed to be.”

 There was silence between all of us. JC called the morgue and made special arrangements for Joseph’s body. Tommy would not be charged with a murder.

 I refused to let go of Justin, just sobbing into his shoulder. The truth finally came out about our baby and it crushed the both of us. I saw Justin cry silently and we just embraced. I wondered what would have happened if that baby was still alive.

 I wished it was.

 “No more tears, angel. From now on we move to the future.” Justin leaned in and captured my lips.

 “Justin, Natalia… Can I talk to you?” Tommy broke up our kiss. I looked at Justin for an answer, he just nodded.

 Tommy said nothing about the death of Joseph and it was really scary. I mean he killed his own father with ease. I guess it was understandable because Joseph was a bad man.

 We followed Tommy to an office where Hope was already inside. She launched herself at Justin and I and hugged us. She was sobbing hard and it made me cry as well.

 “I’m sorry I lied to the both of you and made you experience so much pain. I had to do it, I had no choice.” She cried. I actually understood her. Joseph had probably manipulated Tommy and Hope into it.

 “We understand.” Justin said and forced a smile. I could tell he really couldn’t completely understand because neither could I. I guess there was nothing we could really say, it was just awkward.

 “I’m sorry too… I shouldn’t have let Joseph do this…I shouldn’t have let him get away with everything.” Tommy closed his eyes. “I found out just last week that he killed my mother for an absurd reason. I grew up without a mother because of his lunacy.”

 “I’m sorry…” Justin said, unsure of what to say. There was still tension between all of us.

 “Don’t be. Joseph needed to die. I should have never believed the horrible stories he fed me about her. I just want to change… and I want you to become the head of the Ryan family Justin.”

 “I couldn’t do that…”

 “You could… I’m not much of a leader, and you would be better. Please do it…”

 “I need to think about it…we should go…”

 “I really am sorry though…”

 “I know you are.” Justin turned away, holding my hand tightly. We headed out the doors to his car. Night had stolen the day away, and all that was left was a pitch-black sky. I got into the car and Justin and I headed to his mansion.

Chapter 40

 “Justin… I don’t know about all of this…” I looked at my husband who was clad in boxers and a wife beater. He looked really sexy but I knew I had to keep thinking about the important things…

 Like him not dying.

 “I know it’s all sudden baby… but we’d be set for life…”

 “I don’t like it one bit. Becoming a mob lord?! I mean you’re business is dangerous enough but this? It’s crazy.”

 I crossed my arms over my chest and watched as he sighed. He turned to look out the window. I couldn’t believe he actually wanted to stay in the business after all of this happened?

 “But what if I’m able to turn it all around. I could make everything legal.”

 “I’ve never heard of selling legal drugs to people outside a pharmacy, Justin!” I scoffed at him.

 “Nat… you really don’t want me to do this do you?”

 “No…I don’t know…” I sighed. “It’s just a really scary thing. I mean I almost lost you once, I don’t want to lose you again.”

 “I know…” Justin walked over to me and wrapped his muscular arms around my body. “But I won’t ever leave you.”

 Small kisses were placed on my forehead. I smiled up at Justin and kissed his lips softly. It was true. I didn’t think I could bear loosing him. Especially because now we were married.

 Justin meant everything to me and life wouldn’t be worth living without him. I showed that clearly during the months without him. I was just empty without him to love me.

 “I’m gonna put the decision in your hands… you do what you feel is right… but just promise me that you’ll always come home to me safely?”

 “I promise.” A grin formed on his face. Justin picked me up and cradled me in his arms. “Now… we’re off to bed.”

 My husband ran to our bedroom where we consummated our love for the rest of the night.

**

 One Year Later…

 Justin and I had just finished celebrating our one-year anniversary by heading to our home in Hawaii. I was approximately four months pregnant at the time with twins. My belly had started to show slightly.

I was also actually ecstatic to be a mother, which really surprised me.

I was lounging around on the couch, watching episodes of Buffy the Vampire Slayer. Yeah I know I’m a loser but oh well.

That was when I heard a knock at the door. Being the lazy person I am, I didn’t want to answer it.

“Baby?!” I called out to Justin. “Can you get that?!”

“Nat, I’m on the phone. I can’t!” Justin replied to me. I rolled my eyes and got off the couch and headed to the front door.

I was proud of Justin, in this past year he, along with Tommy and JC were doing a great job of running the business and even had plans to change it to a shipping company.

Justin, as well as I, wanted to raise our children in a safe environment, and that meant no more Mafia.

Figuring it was Hope or Savannah at the door, I opened it and came face to face with a familiar fat man. I couldn’t place who exactly he was and I stared at him curiously.

“Can I help you, Sir?”

 I assumed it was someone to see Justin. He had people running in and out of the house all the time.

 “Natalia Fuentes. You’re looking more beautiful than ever.” The man pushed his way inside the house and put his hand on my stomach. “Pregnant I see?”

 “Yes, four months…” I looked at the man before me with curiosity. “What’s your name sir? I’ll get Justin for you.”

 “My name? Oh how silly of me… My name is Larry Lopez.”

 LARRY FUCKING LOPEZ! OH MY GOD!! I backed up and went to scream for Justin but a hand clamped over my mouth.

 “Hey there Nat. Didn’t think you’d see me, would you?” Dylan was standing behind me with a smirk on his face.

 The icing on the cake was the fact that my Uncle Eduardo walked in right after. I thought I was going to be sick when I saw him. That fucking bastard!

 “Hola Natalia.” Was all he said.

 I glared at him, not able to say anything due to Dylan’s hand on my mouth. FUCKING BASTARDS!! I couldn’t believe this shit.

 “You’re gonna do something for me Natalia.” My Uncle said in a soothing tone. “You’re going to call very calmly for Justin. If you do anything other than that, Larry will make sure that he dies as well as your children.”

 Dylan removed his hand from over my mouth and I looked toward the stairs. I was signing my husband’s death certificate. I knew it but I had no other choice.

 Dylan’s arm was wrapped around me and a gun was pressed against my head.

 “Justin! Baby… Can you come here one second?”

 “Natalia, I’m busy…”

 “Baby, I need to ask you something important…” I felt the tears falling down my face and I closed my eyes.

 “Alright…” I heard Justin walking to the stairway and a gun went off.

 Dylan’s grip on me loosened and he fell to the floor. I opened my eyes and turned to look, a scream erupted from my throat. I was horrified.

 I turned back and saw Justin on the stairs with the gun in his hand.

 “Step the fuck away from my wife. NOW!”

 I ran to Justin and threw my arms around his neck. He was still holding the gun out and was moving it back and forth at Larry and Eduardo.

 “So tell me, what the fuck do I owe the honor of your visit?”

 “Justin.” Larry Lopez grinned. “We heard you were looking for us so we came to save you the trouble.” Larry held out a gun at Justin and cocked it.

 “Oh really? Well…let me tell you why I wanted to see you… I wanted to-“ Justin shot the gun and hit Larry in the forehead.

 Larry fell dead to the ground and my Uncle Eduardo was the only one left. He looked so shocked that Justin had beaten them.

 My Uncle ran and I was shocked to see that Justin didn’t go after him. I turned to look at him.

 “What are you doing?!”

 “I can’t kill your Uncle.”

 “But…what if he comes back?”

 “Then we’ll deal… I doubt he’ll come back after that…” Justin kissed my forehead and rubbed my slightly swollen belly. “Are you okay?”

 “Yeah… I was so scared… I’m sorry…”

 “Don’t be sorry. It was luck that I glanced at the monitors and saw the Dylan holding you. I got so pissed off. I didn’t care who I had to kill.”

 I smiled and kissed Justin softly. He really was my prince.

 “I love you Justin. Thank you.”

 “Don’t thank me, you’re the mother of my babies and my angel. I’ll always protect you…but come on. I’ll call my men to take care of this and we’ll get out of here.”

 “Thank you for never letting me go, Justin…”

 Justin held my hand and walked to the garage with me. He turned and shook his head.

 “Are you crazy? I could never let you go. You’ve been mine since I first laid eyes on you. That was never going to change.”

 We passionately kissed, relishing in the fact that we defeated the odds. We belonged together and that’s the way it was always going to be.