This is taking forever. J told me we wouldn’t be here all day. But here I sit, four hours later, waiting to finish production on the song. The latest single that is going to help me join forces with my favorite artist of all time.

Garth Brooks. eeeek!

My entire career I have waited to work with him.  He is a legend that doesn’t get near the accolades he should in our business.  He reinvented country/pop music. He is the reason I picked up my guitar at the age of 12. His music is the reason I wanted to become a musician in the first place. No one could make me feel the emotion his songs could.

So now that he is planning his big comeback album, he asked ME-Calandra Stevens, to join him in the studio and try and work on a few new songs. Needless to say, I more than jumped at the chance. But I wanted something fresh.

I knew that even though we had a history, we could always make beautiful music together. So I asked my ex-fiancé, JC Chasez, if he would help produce the album, alongside my best friend Justin Timberlake.

I knew the combination of JC and Justin would be a perfect match for the sound I was trying to attain. JC is amazing with melodies, especially when it comes to arrangements in blues songs. With Justin it was a double win because let’s face it, he’s country boy with a hip hop flavor to him. This wasn’t just anyone I was working with here. This was my idol. So it had to be perfect.

It just so happened that in order to achieve what I wanted out of this opportunity, I was going to have to be around him again.

“Hey Garth, man could you try that chorus one more time. Try starting with the second line in.”  Josh pushed down the synthesizer again and waited. As soon as the rhythm started, Justin doubled the bass line and we were off and running.

I look out of our booth and over at JC. I wrote this song right before the big breakup. I’m still not sure it should even make the album, but as soon as Justin read it, he pitched it to Garth.

So here I stand trying to keep my composure. I should be happy. This is everything I have ever wanted.

“Okay, C baby c’mon on in right after him. We will take it from there please. Just try and mirror his sound.” JC smirks at me. I take a deep breath before I start into the chorus, right in tune with Garth.   

Didn’t get to say goodbye,

didn’t have any time

Wondering why you made me cry,

I know you’re gone but don’t know why

Lying with you under starry skies I’ll miss (yes I’ll miss it baby)

And the passion when we kissed (Ohh  Ohhh)

This feeling hasn’t left me yet

All I wanted was one more Sunset 

“That was great Cal. Let’s try it one more time and then we can grab some grub Mamacita.”

“Alright J, you are after all, “THE PRO” here!” I giggle at him. Sometimes he can just be too damn cocky for his own good. 

Josh stares at me while I belt out the chorus one last time. His eyes, god those eyes. He seems so hurt behind them. And I can’t blame him. I left. I shouldn’t have but at the time I thought I was doing the right thing. Now, I’m really not so sure.

Lying with you under starry skies I’ll miss

And the passion when we kissed (Ohhh Ohhh)

This feeling hasn’t left me yet

All I wanted was one more Sunset

He has NO IDEA. 

It used to be enough for me. Seeing him like this. After so many months apart all I want to do is run to him and hold his body against mine. I need to feel his arms around me. I crave the taste of him on my lips. I miss his scent on my pillow and in our bed. Anything. Just to feel it again. That sensation I get every time he touches me. Or when we would be across the room from one another and he would just look at me with those eyes; eyes that could burn holes through the sun.  Late at night when we would stay up talking until dawn, about nothing and everything. But all that nothing had meant so much more to me than so many something’s because they were all attached to him. Every memory, every kiss, every touch, every whisper, every empty promise made; it all belonged to Josh. And to see him was wonderful. But it also tore into my heart. Because something told me this time it would all change.

It has to. Because I am getting married now, and if I don’t stand my ground and just try to be his friend, then I will let a lot of people down, including myself. It’s killing me inside though, staring into those oceans of deep blue, and not wanting to lose myself in them. I have a feeling this is going to be the hardest thing I have ever had to do. And I don’t want to do it. But I know if I don’t stop this now, there is no chance in either of us moving on.

I’ve tried to go back to having a semi-normal life. Well, as normal as it can get for me. I’ve thrown myself back into my work and it has been amazing. Most of my time has been filled with writing material and locking myself in the studio twenty four seven to get this album finished.

But the memories in that room haunt me while I sit there and write. He built that studio for me. For us. And I can’t help but think of what we used to have. So here I sit, taking this all in. And wondering how the fuck I am supposed to make this work.

And sadly, it is only our second day in the studio with all of us together.

Damn. This is going to be a long month.

“Alright guys, great work. Let’s go eat. I am STARVING man!” Justin is great at giving me the distraction I so desperately need. And I am starting to get a little hungry myself. I hear my stomach growl and I am thankful to J, in more ways than he knows.

JC comes out to meet the three of us in the hallway. “So where we heading, guys?”

“You know all the local places around here boys, not me. I’m new to this town,” Garth says. Even when speaking his words harmonize. I need to stop this borderline obsession I know. But I cannot help but be in awe of him.

“I know a place….,” and before Justin can even finish his sentence Josh steals his thunder.

“Ain’t nobody crying…”

And all three men chuckle.

“Really?” I exclaimed, half joking, half serious.

I mean I am used to their typical banter and finishing each other’s sentences from time to time, but this is Garth Brooks we are in front of here. Come on; let’s try to act our age here. Then it hits me. It wouldn’t be them if they didn’t do shit like this. At least we are all laughing, including Garth. 

Its times like these that make me miss the old days with them. All the chaos, all the drama, all the fighting, all the drunken after parties till god knows when in the morning. I miss it terribly.

Once again my concentration is broken by Justin who is half running across the parking lot towards his Range Rover.

Apparently, we have decided where we are going for lunch and I, in my usual dreamy state of unreality, have missed what we have agreed upon entirely.

I jump in the back with Josh and stare out the window the entire time. I swear I can feel his eyes on me almost the whole way to the restaurant. 

He’s been talking back and forth with J about a new song they have been writing for J’s album. I didn’t catch the title or much of their conversation for that matter.

But I know Garth was giving Josh a few pointers about his acoustic guitar skills. Apparently everyone except me has heard this song. Oh well, I am sure I will eventually right?

For now, I am just trying to come up with conversational topics in my head, so that my mouth and my heart don’t blow this whole entire deal during lunch. It’s been about twenty minutes or so, when I realize we have finally come to a complete stop. Got to love valet in this town, or you would NEVER find parking. I open my door and just as I am about to step out  Josh is already there holding out his hand to help me down.

“Thanks. I don’t remember it being so much of an incline getting in and out of this thing. Haha. Might we lower the rigging, J?”

I stare down at my skirt, brushing over the hem, making sure the back isn’t riding up.

 “You look fine Cal. Lovin the halter vest too. It hugs your curv..It’s workin for ya.” JC smiles at me. I know what he’s thinking behind it and looking at him, I can’t say the thought hadn’t crossed my mind either, but I have to behave.

That is when I look up and realize where we are eating lunch.

“Nooooo!!!!,” I scream at the top of my lungs, in my head.

He wouldn’t do this to me. Neither of them would. Especially not J.

Josh must have noticed the look on my face.

Pure shock and somewhat horror.

Neither of them are going to get away with this.

Not when I am done with both of them.

“C-it’ll be okay. It’s just lunch.” Josh tries to reassure me but I am not so sure.

This is where we had our first “date” if you could call it that.

Boca Café.

This lunch just became a lot more complicated.  

~Sunset~ Song by Calandra Stevens

Lunch was kind of awkward but once Justin realized why there was so much tension in the air, he started talking about our CMA performance. Once we all were hurling ideas at one another the stress seemed to melt away.

Garth had some great ideas for the performance. I am so glad to work with him. That's how you become better. By taking the advice and sometimes criticism of those who have come before you. I am so excited and so humbled.  

Growing up with J and Josh kind of spoiled me as far as my career goes. I never became famous because of my friendship with either of them. Of course, it didn't hurt to have two very famous best friends at my disposal when I needed help writing or producing songs. It wasn't always the easiest to get ahold of them though. Justin runs so many different businesses that most of the time he is lucky if he gets two days off a month. JC has always moved his schedule around for me if need be. Like I said, I am pretty spoiled.

But what I am known for is my writing ability. I even helped a few of Justin's artists with some of their material.  It wasn't until I started dating Josh, that I ever thought I'd have the courage to go out on stage and sing my own songs. It just never occured to me I could pull the performances off. I didn't like that kind of attention. Well, back then I didn't. Now, I am used to it for the most part.  

Once you have a four year relationship in the spotlight, cameras flashing everywhere, reporters constantly calling. stalkerazzi camped outside of your home, it all becomes very generic. I shouldn't say I've gotten used to it. I don't think anyone really can. But I've run the gamut on it, and I have learned to deal with that facet of being a celebrity.

All I know is my marriage is going to fail if I don’t sit down and talk this all out with Josh. And I won’t let my own selfishness cause that to happen. Craig is a wonderful guy. He has taken care of me. He loves me. And I am very grateful to him for putting up with me through all the mess and heartache. 

How are you supposed to tell the love of your life that you are marrying another man? And more importantly, how do you tell them via telephone? I wasn’t prepared to do either of the two.

But if I was going to muster up the courage and strength to tell him the truth, the entire truth, then it needed to be done face to face. I at least owed him that.

Just not today. We need to get this work done. And I need to finish this song once and for all because I don’t know how much longer I can stand to see this look on his face. Every time I sing this song, he looks like I am breaking more of his heart. And that I can’t live with anymore. That it is my fault he is this miserable on the inside. The professional in him is only keeping it together for appearances.

I watch him slide his hands over the top of his legs and I gasp for air. What can I say? He still renders me breathless without even trying. He turns his head toward me, knowing such a simple act still gathers my attention. He winks at me. Then he sings part of the melody him and J have been working on the past four days.

I’ll be taking up your time 

Till the day I make you realize

That for you there could be no one else

I just gotta have you for myself (For myself)

Baby I will take good care of you

No matter what it is you’re going through-ohh

I’ll be there for you when you’re in need

Baby, believe in me  

Am…Am I drooling?  Their voices have a way of taking me with them. I just close my eyes and follow the harmony into a dreamlike state. Until they stop and I come back to my senses. That is when I realize everyone in the room is now staring at me.

“Cal…Cal….EARTH TO CAL!” J is looking at me with a puzzled look on his face. He wants to laugh, but I think he might also be really concerned. 

“Yeah, I’m good. Just…I..was..jus…” I trail off.

“Needin a bib girl? HA! Don’t worry…..” Justin walks over and hands me several napkins. I stand up and wipe myself off as casually as I can, then walk over to the trash barrel and throw them away.

“I gotcha covered front AND back! Damn…I’ve always loved your ass in skirts. Seriously, you should just wear skirts all the time and not bother with the rest of this. It doesn’t do your body justice.” 

“JC, man, you get a look at your girl? She’s all…..

”Apple Bottom Jeans…boots with the fur

The whole club was lookin at HER!"

“Really, J, must you? I know what her ass looks like TRUST ME.” He smiles at me boyishly.  “And for the record, she’s not so much my girl anymore, if you hadn’t noticed.”

“So..that’s a beautiful song. When did you guys write it?” I'm trying to change the subject as quickly as possible before it ends badly. 

“And enough comments about my ass. I know what it looks like; it’s with me every day.”

“Not today it’s not. You left him back home! Ohhhh!”  Justin laughs and looks over JC, not expecting to see him with such a sad face.

“Sorry man. It was A LOT funnier in my head.”

“Try and keep it to a minimum, ya know..my ego’s bruised enough,” Josh sighs.

"Stop being such a bitch...man..and let's get this done already." Justin throws a cd case at him, and Josh manages to catch it in between his two fingers.

"Alright bro, let's getter done, as they say." JC starts up the back beat and just like that, everything is fading back into normalcy. Kind of.

I don’t know how this happens. It’s amazing to me just how long we have all known each other. And the shit we will put up with from one another.  Especially JT and I.  

Everything that has happened between all of us the past two and a half decades has been a roller coaster ride. Sometimes good, sometimes scary, always ups and downs, but it always seems to come back to just the three of us. And sometimes there's Trish and Trace around to reign us all in. As if that ever works. HA! 

Justin and I met when we were in the third grade. Funny story how that happened. It still amazes me to this day. See, I went to private day care when I was younger because my mother had to work to support the two of us.

And that is where I met Tricia Whitley. We were inseparable ever since I tried stealing her blanket at nap time. And I have loved every crazy, scary, and hilarious moment.

As a matter of fact, I can’t honestly remember a single day of elementary school, junior high, or high school, without her being there. Tricia is hilarious. She has one of those infectious laughs that can be inviting, but overly obnoxious at the same time. Picture a 5’4 petite blonde, with Justin’s eyes and a bad boy attitude. That’s Trish.

Did I mention she was Justin’s cousin? Yeah, that’s how all of this started. One summer I was asked by Tricia’s dad if I could come with them out to Tennessee for a few weeks. My mom was a little skeptical, but Tom assured her we would be supervised the entire trip. They had enough relatives out in Millington to herd an entire cattle prod.  And Trish and I must have jumped up and down for at least four hours until she finally gave in and said yes. So I was off to spend six weeks with my best friend in the sticks of Tennessee.

I met Justin the first day we landed. His mom, Lynn, picked us up at the airport in Memphis. He was so different back then.  A little pale faced boy with gorgeous blue eyes and skinned knees. I admit, as young as we were, every girl within a 10 mile radius had a crush on him.

Trace Ayala, his best friend to this day, was always the opposite of him. Trace came up with all the ideas of what we should do, the kind of trouble we could find, and what pranks we could pull. Matter of fact, Trace is the reason that we are still not allowed to camp overnight at the state forest along Tennessee River. Don’t even ask. I’ll suffice it to say it involved an air mattress, a tow rope, and a very wet and not so happy Trish. But it WAS funny. Hilarious. She can laugh at it now, but it’s still a sore subject between her and Trace. The weirdest thing is that we have all managed to stay friends ever since that summer.

And Justin was so annoying back then. All he ever did was sing. Everywhere we went. We would sing along too sometimes of course. But I mean he knew the words to Judd’s songs at the age of eight. Who knows that? At the age of eight? How does a little kid in ripped bibballs and cowboy boots know how to sing that caliber of songs?

Since that summer, JT, Trace, Trish, and I have all been best friends. In fact, I spent about every waking moment I wasn’t in school, out in Millington with Trish and her family. “Our Family.”

While he was on the show he met a lot of other kids. I mean obviously he was going to; it was an incredibly popular show. That is where he met my current ex-fiancée JC Chasez.

After the Mickey Mouse Club ended, JC moved to Millington with Justin and the family for a bit. That is when I met him. I was ten years old and I remember that day perfectly.

We were making brownies with Momma Lynn for Trish’s birthday. She always let us lick the spoon and bowl when she was done. Josh took his brownie-battered wooden spoon and slapped me on the cheek. Ever since that day I have been in love with him. Two best friends in love with their friendship. At times it’s been more, and as of lately, it’s been a lot less. But something always makes us gravitate towards one another. No matter how close or how far away, or what is going on in our lives, someplace deep down, we have come to realize, that we are kindred spirits. Through breakups, makeups, and our entire engagement. Right up until the falling out and I walked away all we have known since we were kids is each other.

“Callie…will you tell ya boy that we just wanna hit it once and in the morning you’ll go back to being you, and I’ll go back to being single. It’s no big deal, really.” Justin’s semi-joking with me now.  Still I take advantage and fire back a little.

“Yeah, J, funny enough I’ve heard that about you. And well, my momma taught me never to put small things in my mouth. Sorry, hun can’t help you out.” I rub his head playfully and he jumps away from me.  

“OUCH!  That hurt girl! You’ve been hangin around us too long. And darlin’ you don’t know what you’re missing. Baby, I would love you like a New England snowstorm.  I’ll be giving ya 8-10 inches, and you’d be laid up in bed for 3 to 4 days!”    

We couldn’t help but laugh at ourselves. I had to give him credit. It was a great line.  “J…quit trying to mack on Cal for five seconds and come help me finish this. We’ve been here all damn day man.”  Josh was trying to remain calm but I could see he was starting to get pissed with Justin’s antics. I mouthed, “It’s okay,” to him, under my breath. Hoping it might cool him off a little.   

I have to admit that it has been kind of nice having my boys back. Even if it’s only going to be temporary.

Garth had to head back to the hotel and spend some much needed time with his girls and his wife. Ever since we started this project none of us have had any time for anyone except each other.  

It'll be alright though. We will do the CMA performance, then the album will drop, we will have television and radio interviews, a few press junkets, and then an eight month tour.

Eight months.

Then I am free to have some down time. I know it seems like a long time but when you have to schedule dentist appointments 14 months in advance because you never have time, then you will understand why eight months is a very short time frame. 

I am just not so sure how I am going to keep it all together for this long. Especially since we might be touring together for Garth's farewell.  

Sigh.

It might be a long eight months after all.

~Selfish~ Song By Nsync

Flashback: Justin's POV. April 2003. 

“Hey, we got the package you wanted. The cake won’t be ready for a few more hours. Something about it being very detailed and so last minute. Yeah, Yeah, of course I told them we would pay double. He said he would still need more time. Of course, it will be perfect. Just chill out, man! She’s going to love it either way! I’m hanging up now. We will be there in five.”  Justin hung up his phone with exasperation. 

“Fuckin’ kid is losing his mind over her party. He can tell us all he wants that it’s just a “phase”. BULLSHIT! Sexin is written all over his face. They might not be yet, but YET is the operative word.”  He throws his cell toward the back of the car, not particularly caring where it lands. 

“Don’t you think one of ‘em would have said something by now? I mean, Fuck, we’ve known each other for years. Ya figure someone would slip up eventually. I gotta say Cal’s been actin real fuckin strange around us lately.

Come to think of it, she all but eye fucked him when we had dinner last week. And the way she’s been dressin lately. Daisy dukes, skirts, and the heels. Coming up with every excuse to be in the studio with him. “Learning purposes,” she says. Yeah, and my dick’s the size of Ron Jeremy’s.”  Trace laughed at himself.  

“Could you even imagine man? Cal. And. JC. But maybe that is what tonight is all about for him. Maybe he’s throwin her this lavish 25th birthday cause he’s gonna make his move.”  Trace looked over at Justin, who was cracking up. 

“T, are we talkin about the same dude? He don’t make the first move EVER. Hell, Bobbie had to practically jump his ass for him to even try. He’s shy around females bro. The more he’s interested, the less he tries. Fear of striking out. But…..Maybe. I mean, you’re right. It would definitely explain a lot of the shit that’s been going on.” 

Justin sat there staring out the window for what seemed like an eternity to Trace.  

“J? What you thinking man?” 

“Nothing dude. It’s just, it’s Cal. And JC. Cal is our sister. My mom all but gave birth to her. And , C, he’s our bro. So, if something is going on, it might end REALLY BADLY. For all of us. They are both sensitive types. Plus, it’s Callie. You know the deal with that.”  Justin put his hand behind his head and started rubbing the back of his neck nervously. 

“I don’t get you man. Are you worried cause you are afraid of them hurting one another? Or are you just pissed cause you never took your chance when you had it?”  Trace had hit the nail on the head, but Justin wasn’t quite ready to admit it to himself. Or anyone else for that matter. 

“Look, let’s just get the rest of the shit and get back. We don’t even know if anything is happening between them yet. Oh! By the way, we have one more stop to make. Turn around!” Justin commanded Trace. 

“I can’t make a U Turn here. It is six lanes of highway!! Where do you have to go that’s so fuckin important?” 

“Jakob’s.”  

“You can’t be fuckin serious J?! That’s on the other side of L.A.! What the hell are you gonna buy her at Jakob’s? An engagement ring? I mean, FUCK. She’s our friend. Not your wife.” 

“She’d make a fuckin hot ass wife though, wouldn’t she?” He closed his eyes and visualized her walking around his house with nothing on but his jersey.  

“Your heads up your ass, you fuckin flake!” Trace was PISSED, to say the very least. 

“Chill out T. I’m not buyin her a damn engagement ring. There was a watch she was eyeing the other day when I bought my chain. It will look great on her.  She’s gonna love it.

Plus, it’s not just ANY old birthday. She’s turning 25. That’s a rite of passage. Look at the party she threw us for our birthdays. We gotta make it up to her. Especially since she’s kept our little secret from Vegas. I  OWE her BIGTIME! Cause if that shit ever got out, we would be fucked.” 

Vegas had been an experience that was for sure. None of them remembered much of their nine day stay at the Bellagio, but what they did remember they all kept to themselves. If it ever leaked to the press or anyone at Jive or WEG their careers could be in jeopardy. And the paps would eat it up. That was the last thing anyone wanted, so they all agreed before they got on the plane. What happens in Vegas stays in Vegas! And it had. Thank god. 

Still Justin couldn’t help but think of Cal. And that week in Vegas. And the gold bikini she had worn with her white gladiator wedges that tied up her leg just above her knees.  That was when he knew he felt more than a friendship with her. He was starting to fall for her.  He had known there was some type of connection between her and JC, but he couldn’t put a label on it. They had been friends for so long that it was hard to pinpoint exactly what they shared.  He had planned on talking to her about it during the week, just to see if she might have felt the same. But then again, nothing that week had gone as planned. 

But she had kept the secret for them. So he was going to help throw the biggest birthday bash in the world for one of his closest friends.  No matter how he felt about her romantically he would put that aside for now and just focus on her party.  

Besides, Cal couldn’t really be falling for JC could she? He’s so clumsy. And boring. He plays with yo-yo’s for christ sake. Nah, there wasn’t anything going on between them. There couldn’t be. Trace was just overanalyzing everything once again. She wouldn’t love a guy who wears socks with sandals. Totally not her type.  

“Maybe I’ll get her the matching ring too, just because.” 

“You’ve expired your day pass J. I think its best we take you back. NOW!” 

“Fuck you, Moose. It’s only a present or two. Nothing more. Now let’s get this shit done. We still gotta make it to the valley and pick up her cake, and make it back before six so we can help JC set up. You know you’re going in to get the cake, right?” 

“But of course, master, we wouldn’t a mass riot that included death by frosting, now would we?” Trace snorted. 

“One of these days, man! I’m telling you! Hey, call Jakob and ask him if he can meet us at the private entrance. I don’t need two million screaming girls and half of L.A.’s paps wondering why I’m buying jewelry.” 

“Are you sure there’s nothing more to this? Like tryin to get in Cal’s pants?” 

“Motherfucker, I can get a piece of ass any damn time I want. It’s not about that. I’m just trying to make sure her birthday’s special for her. That’s it. Period. Got me?” Now Trace was working his last nerve. 

“I’m sayin, it wouldn’t be the first time you t…..” Trace suddenly got cut off by Justin. 

“Shut your mouth right fucking now. She’s our friend. We’ve known her since we were little kids Trace. What the fuck are you so concerned for anyways? Don’t you love her like she’s  family? ANSWER ME!” Justin barked at Trace and pounded his  fists into the dashboard. 

“Of course I love her like a sister, you retard! That’s why I’m so fucking concerned. Now, calm the fuck down, we are almost at Jakob’s place. You'll go in, grab her gifts, and then bolt  We can drive to the valley. I’ll go get the damn cake and we can blow this coke stand. Aight? You cool?” 

“Yeah. Just fuckin drive, biotch. I’m straight. Let’s just drop it.” He let out a defeated sigh before admitting to himself that Trace had been right. About everything. He was just being too stubborn to admit it. And he resented Trace for bringing it all up. Especially the snide remark referring to Vegas.  

Justin started playing with the radio, trying to find something good that might make his mood happier. Commercial. Commercial. Oh great song, I haven’t heard this in awhi….Are you fuckin serious? Okay, I guess it was a goddamn commercial after all. Commercial.  

“This is Samantha Taylor with your afternoon traffic report. We’ve got bumper to bumper traffic on the 405 West. Sorry if you’re unfortunate enough to…..”  Click. Apparently, Samantha was done talking.  

“No shit, SAMANTHA, we are FUCKING IN IT!! Grrrr…….” 

Trace pressed the mute button on the radio. “Dude, shut up. I’m on the phone waiting for Jake or Carolyn. They have to get some security at the private entrance. They’ve had a lot of celebs in there today, I guess.” 

“When he comes back just tell him I want the necklace, watch, and ring we had discussed last time I was in. Carolyn knows which ones. She’s the one that showed them to Cal when we went in there. Tell him to box and wrap em, and ask Carolyn if she can be a doll and write out a nice card.

I want it to say…”For the Girl….” 

Trace didn’t even let Justin finish his sentence before cutting him off again. “Don’t dude. MAJOR cheese ball issues going on there!” 

“I wasn’t gonna write that you Putz! Fuckin listen to me for once.  Have her write, For the Girl who stole second base, and then stole my heart. Happy 25th Birthday! Love Always, Your JuJu.” 

“Aww, you want me to see if she can throw in a box of heart shaped chocolates too, Nora Roberts?” 

“Get your face fucked Trace.” 

“You first, pal o mundo!” 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Flashback: JC’s POV April 2003 

“She’s coming! Quick, turn off the lights! Trace..Trace!! Get down or she’ll see…everyone be quiet, here she comes.” I  shushed everyone to silence. Then we silently waited for Cal and Trish to come through the door. I could see through the black tinted windows just barely. They had gotten out of Trish’s car and stopped to talk to Craig who was outside on his cell.

Great distraction. 

Trish kissed Craig hello and hugged him like it was the last time she was ever going to see him. They had been together for over two years now. Trish just started the search for their first place. Craig was cool enough to hang but there was something about him that felt-off. He was always the person in the group that was too touchy feely. I was never sure if he was more interested in Cal or Trish. The way he looks at Cal sometimes, and touches her when they are having a conversation is enough to make my skin crawl. I think he might be settling for Trish because Cal doesn’t really acknowledge him all that much. With her career taking off right now she barely has time to pee, never mind paying attention to her best friend’s boyfriend and his slight infatuation with her. Sometimes it’s hard for me to believe that Craig and Trish have lasted this long. And poor Trish. She is head over feet for him and he doesn’t even realize what a great woman he has because he’s too busy chasing Cal around.

I have tried talking to her about it but she is very forgiving and this is the most serious relationship she has ever had. It saddens me that one of my best friends is willing to settle for someone that only loves her with half his heart. But what can I do?  Either way, it isn’t really my problem other than having to put up with the guy’s antics. And knowing eventually she will realize how he treats her and I will have to be there to help pick up the pieces.

But I can’t think about that right now. Tonight my focus needs to be entirely on Callie. She looks so beautiful. I think what makes her stand out from so many other women is that she is naturally gorgeous.

Personally, I think she looks her best in blue jeans and her white cowboy boots with hardly any makeup on. She’s one of those women that when you saw her on the street you would turn your head and do a double take. Not like any of the women in the business today. Most of them were entirely plastic. Not Cal. Nothing on her was unnatural. Not even her breasts, which were sitting quite nicely inside her denim jumpsuit.

“Here she comes….on the count of three. ONE. TWO. THREE.” “SURPRISE!!!!!!!!!!” Everyone had yelled so loud that it was echoing off the walls and lingering long after we had yelled it. 

“Ohhhhhhh! You GUYS!!! You…You’re…..I friggin LOVE YOU!” Cal was having trouble speaking. She was stunned. We completely surprised her. She hadn’t suspected a thing. She took a deep breath before she adjusted her eyes from the sudden burst of light. She rubbed them a few times before she reopened them to focus on the room. She looked to her left and right. Then she rubbed her eyes again in disbelief. The entire ballroom had been transformed into a castle theme. There was a wooden gated archway, made entirely of balloons, which led out to the dance floor. The walls were lined with dark red and purple velvet drapes. There were matching tablecloths and napkins on all the tables in the dining area.  Even small scrolls had been placed at each table for seating arrangements. The lighting was gorgeous. White and yellow lights filled the space above them, shimmering against the darkness of the room. Someone had even gone to the trouble of placing a throne at the top of the steps that led out to the terrace. It was a kingdom designed entirely for her. She was speechless. She stared in amazement for a long time. Her eyes welled up with tears now.

“You guys shouldn’t have done this. It’s too much. Really. I. I don’t deserve all of this. I can’t…..I’m. Thank you so much. All of you. It’s beautiful. Something straight out of a Hollywood fucking set.” Everyone laughed. Including her. That was Callie though. One minute she is the most humble and grateful person you have ever met, and the next minute she is swearing like a truck driver. That constant contradiction of herself is what made me want her in the first place.

Cal was wiping her tears away now. And everyone was starting to gather around her to say their” hello’s” and “happy birthdays.”  A group of people from Jive were chatting her up and passing the drinks around. I headed over toward the DJ to see what he had in his collection. I was rifling through his playlists when Justin and Trace came up from behind me.

“We totally got her man. She didn’t expect it at all. Great team work ya’ll. Did you see her face? HAHA! Priceless.”  Justin snorted.

“No, J. I gotta disagree with you there. Callie’s reaction was wonderful. But dude, PRICELESS, was when your dumb ass got Punk’d by Kutcher. THAT was Priceless!” Trace was now slap happy. And even I had to admit that he was right. Justin’s Punk’d episode was by far the funniest. They even took his dogs and he was crying on his front steps. HILARIOUS. I high fived Trace. “Good one!” I exclaimed. We were both rolling.  But honestly what did Justin think would happen after so many years of pranks and goofing off?

“Shut Up! Seriously, Shut the hell up! Okay, you’re both right. He did get me. But I really thought they took my dogs and I was never gonna see them again. I’ve had Bella for eight years. And Dax really did break that fake guitar they had. Mine was signed by Willie Nelson you ass. Do you know what I would have done if they had smashed it to pieces? Damn. What would ya’ll have done if it was your personal shit? You would have been pissed and emotional. Just like I was when it happened.” Justin threw back the rest of his Jack & Coke. 

He looked over at Cal who was still really busy schmoozing people left and right.“Do ya’ll see what Cal’s wearing tonight? She’s looking FIERCE. My lawd. I’m afraid to hug her. If I press that body against mine,there’s no tellin what I might do to her tonight. She’s been dressing up a lot more lately. Have you guys noticed the changes in her? And those heels! Oh my god! Woo! I’m gonna have to go to church in the morning!” Justin was staring down at Cal from the DJ booth. His eyes wide and ever-wondering.  He had that glazed over glow on his face. 

How could I have not noticed it before? Did I miss something? When the fuck did Justin start liking Cal in more than a “just friends” kind of way? They’ve known each other longer than I’ve known her and Trish. And it’s been a long ass time. Sure, I fell for her the moment I saw her in Justin’s kitchen. But that was different. Cal and I had always had this unrequited love between us. I don’t know what made me smack her with the spoon of brownie mix. It’s just that she made me so nervous for reasons I had no idea of yet.  

Now, after twenty or so years of friendship and this back and forth flirtation, I’m finding out that our best friend is trying to fuck her. They are like brother and sister though, which is why the mere thought of them having sex is disgusting to me. Neither of them had that kind of relationship with each other. Cal was practically his “boy”. 

I’ve waited for so long to have tonight. This perfect opportunity to let her know everything I have felt for her and then some, and I am not about to let Justin or anyone else steal it away from me. I went to a lot of trouble trying to get this party organized for her and I’ll be damned if she leaves with him tonight. Fuck that!

I walked briskly down to the bar and waved the curvy blonde with the great ass over to me. “Gimme three shots of tequila. Make one of ‘em a double please. I need a little courage in a glass.” I watched her walk away with a huge grin on her face. She had recognized me, but I didn’t care. The only girl I was leaving with tonight was Cal. And she most definitely was not a girl. She was a woman. The bartender came back with my order and I handed her a fifty and told her to keep it. She flashed me another smile and slipped me a napkin. I took it graciously because I didn’t want to insult her or hurt her feelings, but I ended up throwing it away after I drank my shots.

Here goes nothing.

I signaled the DJ for the song I had selected and walked over to Cal. I took her hand and intertwined with mine. She had been talking to Craig before I had headed her way. This guy. This guy is just all wrong. She wrapped her other hand around the front of my waist and squeezed me closer to her. Something we often did when we needed comfort. I looked into her eyes. They were a deep green color tonight. Usually they changed depending on her outfit or her mood. She has always amazed me, but something about her was magnetizing tonight. Something was different. And I couldn’t put my finger on what it was.

“You wanna dance, babydoll?” I whispered.

Right at that moment, I Need You Tonight by INXS, came over the P.A.Everyone was heading to the dance floor. Even Trace, who never dances, was being led by Trish to join us all.“I LOVE THIS SONG! Let’s hit it!” She unwrapped herself from me and we headed to the middle of the crowd. I knew the song would work. She’s a sucker for eighties and nineties songs.

All you got is this moment

Twenty-first century’s yesterday

You can care all you want

Everybody does

Yeah that’s okay 

Cal turned around and was swaying her ass back and forth against me. It was turning me on more than she knew. If she didn’t notice yet, she would soon. Especially if she keeps grinding me like this. It’s taking everything in me to not bang her up against a wall in the back of the room. But she deserves more than that. She isn’t just some cheap fuck to me. So I am trying my best to fight this. But it is only a matter of time before I will lose control. 

So slide over here

And give me a moment

Your moves are so raw

I’ve got to let you know

I’ve got to let you know

You’re one of my kind

I need you tonight

Cause I’m not sleeping

There’s something about you girl

That makes me sweat 

Everyone sang out the chorus as loud as they could. And just as I was getting used to Cal’s rhythm she would switch it up on me, which was driving me more and more wild for her. The heat that was building between us was incredible. Sweat. Lust. Need. Longing. Hot. Passion. Wet.

She turned around to face me now and draped her arms over my neck, gently tugging at my hair with her fingers. OH. MY. GOD. We started riding the wave together. It was coming soon. We both knew it.

How do you feel? I’m lonely

What do you think? Can’t think it all

Whatcha gonna do? Gonna live my life

So slide over here And give me a moment

Your moves are so raw I’ve got to let you know

I’ve got to let you know 

Cal ran her hands up the front of my chest a few times before she leaned in to whisper in my ear. “You’re one of my kind.” She purred.Holy shit. If we don’t slow this down a little, I am going to cum right here, right fucking now. I put one hand against the small of her back and bent her down gently. Cal knew what I was trying to do and shimmered her way down, and let herself linger there against me for a few moments before slowly sliding back up against me.

She wants to play a little, then so will I. After all, it is her birthday. I started breathing shallowly in her ear, then tugging lightly on the crest between her earlobe and her neckline. She was starting to pant against my shoulder. This could really happen. A smile crosses my face when I hear a moan escape her lips.  “Mmmmm.”, she cooed. So to tilt things more in my own favor, I started singing the song as close to her lips as I could get without touching them.

“I need you tonight Cause I’m not sleeping

There’s something about you girl

That makes me sweat 

So how do you feel? I’m lonely

What do you think? Can’t think it all

Whatcha gonna do? Gonna live my life”

Cal took my left hand and turned the opposite direction so she could pin her against me again. She placed my hand over the front her chest. These teasing games of hers were really starting to wear on me. She’d be lucky if I let her leave her own party in her clothes.

So slide over here

And give me a moment

Your moves are so raw

It was the last verse and everyone was screaming out the song while they were moving to the beat. The floor was so crowded that not too many people even noticed our little show for each other, which I was certainly thankful for. With the exception of Justin, who was dancing with some public relations girl from Atlantic Records. But I didn’t really give a flying fuck about his dirty looks right now. I was rock hard and Cal knew it. Matter of fact, she was loving being able to torture me like this.

I’ve got to let you know

I’ve got to let you know

You’re my kind

The song ended and we were arm in arm, heading out towards the terrace. Hormones raging. Pent up aggression. And this aching need between the two of us. Just then the DJ came on. “It’s time for presents ladies and gentlemen. Please make your way down to the dining area. And we need our birthday girl to come to her throne please. Princess Calandra? Are you with us somewhere?”

Cal winked at me with a come get me grin written all over her face. And I knew right where this was headed. “Fuck the presents! I can get them in the morning. Let’s get out of here before I’m spotted.” She threw off her shoes and took them into her hands. “Ready?” She asked shyly. But there was no sense of shyness about this unspoken decision we had just made. We were going to leave. Together. Tonight. NOW.

“Yeah, just let me go out first, ok? It will look less suspicious.” I kissed her on her forehead and headed out the terrace doors. I was lying through my teeth about the suspicion. Honestly, I don’t care what people will say about us having this moment. The truth was I had a really big surprise for her birthday present. I whistled and it pulled up just in time. Cal came out the doors just as it had stopped by the side entrance.

“Happy 25th Birthday Sweetie. A ride built for a princess.” I waited for her reaction.

“Josh. Josh. It’s perfect. How did you….I’ve never told anyo….A Horse drawn carriage? I must be dreaming this night up. Pinch me. Pinch me right now. Because if you don’t then I will have to believe this is all real. And I…it can’t be this wonderful. It’s too much perfect for one person.”I cut her off there.

“Well what would a fairytale birthday be without the carriage? Then it would be some sick imitation of a really thrown together party, and that is just unacceptable. Especially for my queen.” I opened the carriage door and reached inside. “These are for you too. Go ahead. You can open it. Nothing will bite you. I promise.”

She opened the box and almost dropped it. Luckily, my reaction time was just quick enough to catch them before they hit the ground. I took the right one in my hand and knelt down on one knee. “May I, your majesty?”

“Don’t call me that. It makes me feel like I’m inferior to you. And I am not. If anything, you are inferior to me. And, yes, you may.” She raised her leg and did her best to balance on her left foot. Then she switched feet, and I placed the left shoe on her foot.

“Your chariot waits gorgeous.” I held out my hand to help her into the carriage. It was pretty high up, a lot higher than what either of us expected. “Joshua you didn’t have to do all this. I would have been fine with a sweater and some socks. Really! You know me by now. But thank you so much baby. This is more than I could have ever wished for. And I don’t even want to know what these glass slippers cost you. They are so delicate I am almost afraid to wear them. I am a klutz with a capitol K. Why did you do all this?”

I straightened up a bit before I answered her. I cupped her face in my hands, which were trembling with anticipation. “Because I wanted it to be extra special for you. You work so hard. This year has been really long for you and you haven’t had any time for yourself. So I figured if I could give you twenty-four hours of sunrise, you might feel better again. And smile more often. And not worry so much about business all the time. That, and I,” I was stammering. I had told her I loved her before, but never that I was in love with her. There was a huge difference between two very meaningful sayings. And I didn’t want to just say them. I wanted her to feel them. To know in her heart, that there was no doubt, they were true and I meant every word.

“I,…I am in love with you Calandra. And I have been for the past, oh I don’t know, twenty years or so. I am in love with you. And I always have been. Ever since the brownie batter. And that precious and goofy wide-eyed look on your face when it happened. Haha. I love you. And I always will.” Well I put it out there. There is no taking it back now. At least she knows. Even if she doesn’t feel the same, I finally told her. I felt a huge weight lift off my shoulders. I was reliving that moment in my mind, over and over again, when she interrupted me.

“Joshua. I am in love with you too.” She didn’t have to say anything else. She said it all. She loved me too. She loved me back. For once, someone loved me back. And my heart soared. We kissed the first kiss we have ever shared romantically. It was breathtaking, and beautiful, and just absolutely the best feeling in the whole world. If I had a lifetime of just holding her and kissing her this way, I would die a happy man.

We left the party and were heading back to my place for the night. All the guests were roaming around searching for Calandra. But we were already headed home. None of them knew, but they would find out soon enough. Especially since Justin and Trace watched us leave from the terrace. I wish I felt bad. I really do. But I can’t because it is Cal. It’s us. And we are in love.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 

“So, where do you think they are going?” Trace asked Justin, who was pacing back and forth. “I have no idea. I’m not sure I want to know, actually. But I can tell you one thing. He just won her. She isn’t a prize or anything, but I stand no chance now.” Justin was fidgeting with the buttons on his jacket. Still pacing nervously, trying to think how the hell all of this happened.“Don’t say that, man. Hey, you don’t know. Neither of us does.” Trace was trying to comfort his friend as best he could.

“You can be so stupid sometimes. It scares me that you don’t come with a warning label. Fuck. He just took her away Trace. In a fucking horse drawn carriage. He bought her glass fucking slippers. Yeah, my watch is looking GREAT right now.” Justin was exasperated and hurt.

And all he wanted to do now was go home.

But he never planned on leaving alone.

~I Need You Tonight by INXS~