It's empty in the valley of your heart
The sun, it rises slowly as you walk
Away from all the fears
And all the faults you've left behind

The harvest left no food for you to eat
You cannibal, you meat-eater, you see
But I have seen the same
I know the shame in your defeat

But I will hold on hope
And I won't let you choke
On the noose around your neck

Mumford and Sons – “The Cave”

Parties like this were the bane of Shelby’s existence.  Honestly.  A bunch of stuffy suits mixed with a bunch of snobby celebrities, and not enough booze in the world that could make a difference.  She was here because her father had needed a date, and with her mother’s recent death, she couldn’t say no. 

“I’m going to get another drink, Dad.  Need anything?”  Peter’s gaze settled on his daughter, his thoughts obviously elsewhere as he shook his head. 

“No thanks, Shel.  Go have fun.”  He returned to his conversation leaving Shelby to fend for herself.

She took a deep breath, heading through the crowd and avoiding the gaze of anyone around her.  She didn’t feel like making small talk or pretending to be interested in some lame conversation about musical directions or business transactions.  People assumed that just because she was her father’s daughter meant she was interested in the business, too.  Not so.

“Whisky Sour, please.”  She gratefully leaned against the bar, happy to have a drink on the way so she could spice up this night a little bit.  Maybe it wouldn’t be so bad after all.

“Shelby!” 

Oh crap.  “Hey, David,” Shelby turned slowly, making sure to plaster on a smile that she wasn’t really feeling.  “How are you?”  She let him hug her before stepping back and putting a good amount of space between them.

“Great, I’m great.  How are you?  You look fantastic.”  David Cook of American Idol fame had an obvious crush on Shelby, which she has reciprocated for a little while, but then…things just got to be too much.  Any connection they had had fizzled out after their first date and she was overwhelmed with attention that she wasn’t sure she wanted.  It had been her saving grace when she’d had to move back to New York when school started back up.  She’d left him without much of an explanation, which made for a really awkward moment right now.  She threw back her drink in a few large gulps.

“I’m doing all right.  Just here to support my father.”  It wasn’t a secret that her mother had passed a few months ago, but the look on David’s face said he’d forgotten all about it.  Suddenly he looked ashamed.

“I’m so sorry about your Mom.”  He laid a gentle hand on Shelby’s arm, which she stared at with thinly veiled contempt.

“Thank you.  I have to get going, though.  It was great to see you again.”  She slipped past him, getting lost in a crowd of people before he could chase after her.  Unfortunately, in her haste, she missed the person standing in her way.  “Oh shit.”  Her face slammed into a chest that was rather firm, and her head mostly definitely cracked someone’s chin.

“Whoa, hey, where’s the fucking fire?”  A masculine voice sounded above her has warm hands encircled her biceps, steading the both of them.

“I am so sorry.”  She glanced up to find that she’s just plowed into Justin Timberlake.  Fantastic.  “I wasn’t watching where I was going.”  Her cheeks were flaming and the alcohol she’d just downed wasn’t helping.

“So I noticed.”  He didn’t seem too upset, but Shelby still felt mortified.  Was it time to go yet?  “Are you okay?  I think my chin may have cracked your skull.”

Shelby raised a hand to her forehead, wincing at the tender bump that was beginning to sprout.  “I think I’ll be okay.  I feel like such an idiot.”  She finally stepped out of his personal space, chancing a look into his eyes.  He was smiling.

“It’s okay.  This party was beyond boring anyway, you just broke up the monotony.”  Justin’s fingers brushed the bump on her head lightly as he peered down at her.  “You sure you’re okay?”

Shelby nodded.  “Yeah, I have a hard head.”

“Yeah, I know.”  He rubbed his chin and Shelby felt her cheeks flame again.  “I’m just teasing you.”  His eyes studied her face for a moment, finally taking in the girl in front of him.  “You look very familiar.”  He stated.

Shelby shook her head, stopping when a headache started to form.  “I’m certain we haven’t met before, but I’m sure you know my father.”

Justin chuckled, “that sounds ominous.” 

Shelby stuck out her hand, “Shelby Edge.  It’s a pleasure to run into you, Justin.”  He shook her hand, his eyebrows shooting up in surprise at the mention of her last name.

“Edge?  As in Peter Edge?  As in the CEO of RCA records?”

“One in the same.”

“Well, shit, the pleasure is all mine.”

Shelby raised an eyebrow playfully, “You might not say that when you have to pitch your next album.”  She ginned to show she was kidding.

“I was just about to head to the bar to grab a drink.  Would you care to join me?”  Justin held out his arm for Shelby to take, and she glanced over her shoulder back toward the bar.  David was still standing there, looking lost and pitiful.  She cringed.  Justin gave a curious look at her hesitation, following her sight line to the bar.  “Oh.  Are we avoiding someone?”

“Something like that.  He’s got a crush on me…and…I might have just ditched him before I ran into you.”

Justin laughed out loud, completely amused by this girl.  “Tell you what.  I’ll go grab us some drinks and you find us a place to sit.”  He pointed to a set of small tables off to the side, which Shelby wrinkled her nose at when she saw how crowded they were.

“Okay, but I’ve got a better idea about the seating.  Meet me by the door.”  Justin nodded, heading off into the crowd and Shelby turned in the other direction.  She stopped briefly to speak with her father, who was still caught up in mindless conversations, so she headed toward the door and waited for Justin.

The idea that she was hanging out with Justin Timberlake amused Shelby greatly.  Surprisingly enough, they had never met before, but he was proving to be quite charming.  He also provided a fantastic distraction from this horrible party.  Normally, she avoided these things at all costs.  When she was younger, she followed her dad around the studios and once entertained the idea of getting into some aspect of the music world, but then she grew up and found other passions that took her away from that world.  He was upset with her decision to move to New York, to say the least, and it was only recently that they’d been on speaking terms again and that only because of her mother’s death.

“I didn’t know what you wanted, so I grabbed you a glass of wine.  I hope that’s okay.”  Justin’s voice broke through Shelby’s thoughts and she gratefully accepted the glass.

“Wine is perfect.”  She led him down a back hallway and up a small flight of stairs that lead to the back terrace.  RCA had been holding their annual dinner party at this venue as long as Shelby could remember, and she had always found this terrace a nice escape.  “Here we are.”  There was a garden below them, stretching out and fading into the city behind it.  Faint noises from the freeway could be heard, but it was mostly quiet.

“I had no idea this was here.”  Justin’s voice was soft as he looked around.  He was fairly relieved to be out of that party, but he wasn’t sure he should admit that to the boss’s daughter. 

Shelby grabbed a lighter and a cigarette from her purse, offering the pack to Justin.  “Smoke?”

Justin eyed the shiny gold package for a moment, and then shook his head.  “Nah, I’m quitting.”

She shrugged.  “That’s cool.”  He watched her light up, taking a long, soothing drag.  He licked his lips and turned his attention back to the garden.  “So, Mr. Timberlake, what brings you out tonight?  I thought your focus was on movies these days.”

Justin took a deep breath, letting it sit in his lungs before exhaling.  “I have been told that I’m under contract and I need to get my ass back in the studio.  They’ve already set my release dates.” 

“Ouch.  That sucks.”  Another puff of the cigarette, her slender fingers flicking the ashes into the wind.  Justin couldn’t resist anymore, carefully plucking the stick from her fingers and taking his own long pull.  She smirked.  “So much for quitting, aye?”

“I’ll quit tomorrow.”  He grinned at her, taking another drag and handing it back to Shelby.  “I was only quitting because I’m getting back in the studio.  Although, my mother reminds me that it’s a horrible habit.” 

“Oh, I’ve heard that quite often lately, as well.”  She stubbed the butt out on the concrete patio.  “I say fuck ‘em.” 

Justin watched Shelby carefully, noting her posture, her slightly glassy eyes.  Her hands were shaking, he noted with surprise.  He’d known that Peter’s wife had died, but he hadn’t given it much thought tonight.  Now, though, he felt like an ass.  Should he say something?  Or should he pretend that it hadn’t happened?  He was horrible with these things, and he had just met this girl.

He decided to go the roundabout route.  “How’s your dad holding up these days?  I haven’t seen too much of him lately.”

Shelby hesitated.  Obviously he’d made the wrong decision.  “He’s…he’s managing, I guess.  I came home to take care of him, but he’s never agreed with my decision to leave L.A. and stop working in the music business.  He doesn’t think I can do any good in psychology.”  She pulled another cigarette from her purse, lighting it before continuing.  “My mom was the only one who could get him to shut up about it.  Now that she’s gone…”  She trailed off.

“I’m sorry.  That was an incredibly stupid question to ask.”  Justin could feel his cheeks burning. 

She just shrugged.  “No, it wasn’t.”  She attempted to give him a smile, but it was watery and Justin was getting increasingly uncomfortable.  He wasn’t prepared to comfort a stranger.  She seemed to compose herself, though, turning her face back toward the garden.  “I’m heading back to New York in a couple of days.  I can’t wait.”

“New York is a cool place.”  The comment felt lame, but he wasn’t sure what else to say to this girl.

Shelby seemed slightly amused by him, though, and the grin she was sending his way held mischief that he was surprised by.  “Do I make you uncomfortable, Mr. Timberlake?”  Her teeth flashed white as that Cheshire grin stretched when he blushed.

“Actually…you do.”  His momma had always taught him that honesty was the best policy.  “I’m not sure what to say without making myself sound like an ass.”  At that, she laughed out loud.

“I like you, Justin.  You’re all right.”  She patted his forearm, finishing off the last of her wine and grabbing his still full glass.  She drained that, too.  “So, how’s the music coming?  Any more Sexy to bring back?”  Obviously she was drunk, but he was starting to enjoy her oddness.

He chuckled before answering, “actually, the process hasn’t really started yet.  I can’t seem to get in the mind set of making my own music.  I’ve been producing and writing for other people for such a long time now.”

She looked him over, “You need to get out of L.A.  Find a change in scenery.”  The advice was offered as if it were the most obvious thing in the world.  Justin was surprised that he hadn’t thought of the suggestion himself, but there it was.  He watched her for a minute more, to see if she would say anything else, but she seemed content to just stand there and inhale her third butt of the night.  He reached over and snatched the pack of cigarettes from her hands, lighting his own and taking a grateful drag.  Fuck quitting.

“You’re right.  I need to get away.”

She smirked.  “L.A. can be poison if you don’t take a breather.  It sucks you in and entices you, lulling you with its warmth, buttering you up with its obsession with celebrity, kissing your ass and patting you on the back….and then you wake up and realize that you’re suffocating on all it all and you didn’t even know it.”

“That was extremely profound for someone as drunk as you are.”  Justin blurted the thought out, grimacing as soon as he said it.  Shelby laughed it off, though.

“Exactly.”

A throat cleared behind them, causing the both of them to jump at turn at the same time.  “I figured I would find you here.”  Peter Edge stood with his hands in his pockets, eyeing his daughter and her companion with an unreadable expression.

“You always were quick on the uptake, Daddy.”  The venom in her voice surprised Justin, and suddenly he was extremely uncomfortable.

“Good evening, Mr. Edge.”  He held out his hand to shake, and the older man watched his daughter for a moment longer before finally taking Justin’s offered hand.  “Shelby and I were just talking about New York.”  Obviously that was the wrong thing to say to the man, but it couldn’t be taken back now. 

“Right.  She loves it out there.  Broke her poor mother’s heart to see her leave L.A.” 

Shelby finished off her cigarette, stepping on it with a fierceness that had Justin cringing.  She turned quickly, giving her father a scathing look.  “I’m right here, Daddy.  You can address your bullshit to me and leave Justin out of it.”

“You’re drunk, Shelby,” was his only response.

“No shit, Sherlock.  Takes one to know one, though, huh Daddy?”  She spit the words at him, alcohol courage coursing through her veins.  “Let’s go, Justin.  I’m suddenly feeling choked by the dirty air.”  She grabbed his hand, pulling him toward the door that led back into the party.  Justin hesitated, not sure that offending the CEO of his record company was the best idea he’d ever had.  Then again, standing out here wasn’t really a good choice, either.  Peter waved him off, turning to stare out over the landscape, his back to his daughter.

Shelby led Justin through the crowds, steering him around curious party-goers whose eyes followed them to the front door. 

“I don’t think you should be driving like this.”  Justin wasn’t sure he wanted to be around Shelby Edge anymore.  The gentleman in him couldn’t just leave her, though, so he made his next decision without giving it a lot of thought.  “I’ll drive you home.”

She gave him a vacant stare, the pout on her face clashing with her vintage dress and stylish hairdo.  “Whatever.  I need a drink.”  He watched her rummage through her purse as the valet pulled his car around.  She pulled out a flask, taking a long draft and belching loudly when she finished.  “Oops.”  Even her giggle was slurred.

What the fuck are you doing, Timberlake?  His conscience was berating him for not having more of a backbone.  He should leave her here and avoid the tabloid drama he knew came with her.  He should just call her a cab and wash his hands of this mess, call Pete in the morning to apologize and be done with it.  Yet somehow, he couldn’t bring himself to do it.  “Let’s go, watch your head.”  He helped her into his car, closing the door gently and running around.  He generously tipped the valet, flooring it as soon as he pulled out of the parking lot and onto the freeway.

“Oh shit.”  Shelby giggled again, holding onto the door handle as Justin peeled around a corner.  “Oh, shit.”  Her face turned decidedly green.

“Don’t you dare puke in my car, girl.”  He searched for a place to pull over, eyeing a small parking lot which he whipped into as fast as he dared.  “Open the door, Shelby.”  It felt like slow motion as he watched her fumble for the handle, opening the door just in time to lean out of the seat and vomit up everything she had in her system.  Justin closed his eyes, both in relief and disgust as she dry heaved a few times, nothing left in her stomach to expel. 

“Oh fuck me.”  Her face was pallid and sweat soaked.  She looked nothing like the beautiful young woman he’d run into earlier.  “Justin…I feel like shit.”

“You look like shit, too.”

“Funny.”  She hiccupped, covering her mouth and leaning out of the car to heave again.  “Oh god.” 

“Shelby, tell me how to get you home.”  He fumbled around, searching his car for a bottle of water or something to give her, cursing himself for being such a neat freak.

Adamantly, she shook her head.  “Uh-uh.  I’m not going back to that bastard’s house.”  Justin wasn’t sure how she’d given the word ‘bastard’ a lisp, but she’d managed.  “I refuse.”

Slowly, he dragged his hands down his face.  “Where can I take you, then?  A friend, maybe?  You need to be in bed.”

She shook her head again and he felt his heart sinking into his stomach.  “Nope.  My friends are in New York.”  She burped and he could smell the alcohol across the car.

“Fuck.”  He watched her a little longer, making up his mind.  “Do you think you’re done being sick?  Are you going to puke again?”  This time he was relieved to see her shake her head.  “Okay then, let’s close the door and I’ll get you taken care of.”

With a resounding thud, she slammed the door and promptly passed out.

~*~

“You mean to tell me that you have the daughter of the CEO of RCA passed out in your guest bedroom, drunk off her ass because she got into a fight with said father?”  Rachel’s voice was quiet fury as she interrogated Justin.  He sighed tiredly.

“Yeah, that’s exactly what I’m telling you.”

“What the fuck are you thinking?  Justin…this has to be the worst idea you’ve had, ever.”  Her eyes were blazing.

“Does that include the corn rows and the bleach phase, too?”  Trace piped up from his seat at the kitchen table, receiving the middle finger from both cousins for his effort.  “Sheesh, just joking,” he held up his hands in surrender, “kind of.”

“I know, Rachel, but I couldn’t just leave her there.  She’s a fucking mess.”

“Ever heard of a hotel room?”  Her arms flailed, almost smacking Justin across the face.

Justin let out another sigh, counting to ten before he dared to open his mouth.  “I couldn’t leave her alone, Rach.  She’s probably got alcohol poisoning, or some shit like that, and I didn’t want her to be at some random hotel room alone.  I’ll take her back to her dad’s in the morning and send him a fruit basket or something.  It’s going to be fine.”

She scoffed, “famous last words, Timberlake.”  With a heated stare, she pointed at her cousin fiercely.  “I am not cleaning up your mess this time, either.”

He smirked.  Despite the warning bells that were going off in his head, he couldn’t help his next comment; “Cleaning up my messes is what you get paid for.”

“Fuck you.”  She spat, storming out of the kitchen and slamming the door, almost breaking the panes of glass in the process.

“That went well.”  Trace dared to speak again, hoping Justin would be in a little bit better of a mood that his cousin.  He watched the other man sit heavily in one of the kitchen chairs, letting out a breath and slumping down as far as he could.

“This is going to bite me in the ass, isn’t it?”  He eyed Trace warily, not really wanting an answer but knowing he was going to get one anyway.

“Absolutely.”

Spare me your judgements and spare me your dreams

Cause recently mine have been tearing my seams

I sit alone in this winter clarity which clouds my mind

 

Alone in the wind and the rain you left me

It's getting dark darling, too dark to see

And I'm on my knees, and your faith in shreds, it seems

 

Corrupted by the simple sniff of riches blown

I know you have felt much more love than you've shown

And I'm on my knees and the water creeps to my chest

 

The train that must have run her over was still pounding through her head, or so Shelby felt.  The taste in her mouth rivaled any she’d ever had, and she was sure she’d done some incredibly stupid things.  Unfortunately, this wasn’t the first time she’d woken up feeling that way, which is why she wasn’t surprised when she had no idea where she was.

“Oh, fuck me.”  She pulled a pillow over her head, rolling under the soft comforter and hoping to sink into the mattress.  Why did she keep doing this to herself?  Carefully, she peeked above the covers again, taking in her surroundings more thoroughly.  Obviously she wasn’t in a hotel.  It was too nicely decorated and comfortable to be a hotel.  That meant she went home with someone last night. 

She lifted the comforter, peering at her body clad a large t-shirt that must belong to a man.

“Shit.”  She flopped back against the pillows and then immediately regretted the action.  Her head was pounding and she needed to get something to drink.  Carefully, she stepped from the bed and peeked behind an adjacent door, happy to find a bathroom.  On the counter was a toothbrush still in the plastic, a bottle of water, and a package of aspirin.  Obviously someone was looking out for her.  She also spotted a pile of clothing that looked like it would fit her; sweatpants and a t-shirt.  Gratefully, she stripped herself of her clothing and started the shower.  The water was exactly what she needed to shake off the last of her grogginess, although it made the pounding of her head more pronounced.  That was okay, though, because her memory was coming back in bits and pieces and it didn’t seem too bad.

She knew she’d fought with her father, which wasn’t a surprise.  What was slightly shocking was knowing she’d made friends with Justin Timberlake and he’d witnessed her breakdown.  She was hoping that the hospitality she was appreciating was also Justin’s, because that made the most sense.  It was embarrassing, but she could handle that.  She would be heading back to New York in a couple of days, which meant she could make her apologies, be on her way, and never have to face the man again.

After her shower, Shebly felt a little more human, and she was ready to venture out of the bedroom.  Her stomach rumbled loudly, causing Shelby to grimace.  She left the t-shirt and her heels on the bed, not sure what to do with them, and headed down the hallway toward the stairs. 

“She lives.”

The voice startled her, causing her to jump and turn at the top of the stairs.  Justin was behind her, emerging from another room.  "You scared me,” she confessed.

His grin was sheepish.  “Sorry.  I was just coming up to check on you.  How are you feeling?”  His eyes studied her, and suddenly Shelby felt exposed.  She crossed her arms over her chest.

“Like I made an ass of myself and got stupidly drunk last night.” 

Justin chuckled, passing Shelby and heading down the stairs.  He paused, turning to give her a questioning look.  “Are you coming?  I’ll make you breakfast.”

Her stomach grumbled again, propelling Shelby down the carpeted steps.  She glanced around the beautiful house, taking in the art work and trinkets that littered the shelves and walls.  This house was definitely lived in.  The kitchen was huge, but it didn’t surprise her in the least.  She didn’t take Justin as the type of guy to do anything half-way.

“So, I know when I’m hung over the best cure is grease and carbs.  French toast and bacon sound good to you?”  The ingredients were already on the counter, the skillet perched on the stove top.

Shelby nodded.  “Sounds like heaven.”  Before she could ask, a cup of coffee was placed in front of her, steaming and fragrant.  She sighed appreciatively.  “If I’d known I was going to get pampered like this, I would’ve gotten drunk with you a long time ago, Timberlake.”  Justin’s shoulder’s stiffened slightly, but he didn’t say anything.  Shelby kicked herself.  “I’m sorry.”

“For what?”  His back was to her, hands deftly flipping pieces of French toast and moving around strips of bacon.  The question, seemingly innocent, felt immensely loaded.

“For making a horrible first impression and dragging you into this mess between me and my father.  For almost puking in your car.  For taking advantage of your gentleman-ness instead of leaving with my tail tucked between my legs like I should.”  She was surprised by her own honesty, but something about Justin had her wanting to stop hiding.  He looked like a safe place to start.

The tension in Justin’s shoulders shifted, but Shelby still couldn’t see his face.  She had no idea what he was thinking, and it bothered her.  “I swear I’m not psychotic, Justin.  Last night…” she sighed, “last night was the culmination of the past few weeks erupting.  You weren’t supposed to witness it, and I sure as hell never intended to involve you.  I just…he drives me up the wall on a good day, and with my mother gone…” she choked on her words, unable to finish the sentence.

Justin slid a plate of food in front of her, setting a container of syrup next to it.  “You don’t have to explain yourself to me, Shelby.”

She shook her head, adamant, “Yes, I do, because I can only imagine the horrible thoughts you’re thinking about me and it’s not like that.”  Her brown eyes crashed into his blue ones, imploring him to understand her.  He blinked and looked away. 

“Would you like some juice?”  He was pouring some orange juice into a glass, not really listening to her answer.

“No, thank you.”

Silence stretched between them, awkward and confused.  The smell of the bacon was too much, though, and Shelby ignored her need to explain and started to eat.  She devoured the food, unconcerned with how savage and disgusting she must look shoveling toast into her mouth.  “It’s delicious,” she managed to speak between bites.  Justin’s face twisted into a smirk as he watched her.

“You’re a mess.”  The statement held more truth than he intended, but Shelby ignored it, wiping her mouth with the proffered napkin.

“I am sorry for being such a wreck last night, but I swear I’m not some basket case.”  She finished off the last of her coffee.  “And I promise that whatever demons my father and I have to face, your career and your music will not be affected.”  Finally, Justin seemed to relax slightly and the smile on his face was genuine.

“I was going to send him a fruit basket or something.”  The way he said it, shy and slightly embarrassed, had Shelby shaking with the giggles that she could not seem to contain.  It wasn’t long before he joined in with her, his own shoulders shuddering with barely contained mirth. Shelby wasn’t really sure what was so funny about his comment.  Maybe it was imagining the look on her father’s face, receiving an edible bouquet from a pop star.  Or maybe it was thinking about someone like Justin cowering and kissing up to her father.  Either way, it was enough to break the tension, and she was thankful for it. 

“You don’t need to do that, really.”  She managed to tell him when her laughing had settled.  “He’s pissed at me, and I’m sure he knows that you’re the innocent in all of this.  He probably forgot all about it, anyway.”

Justin watched her carefully, his eyebrows drawn in an expression she couldn’t figure out.  It made her squirm, suddenly uncomfortable in a strange, tension-filled way.  Finally, he spoke, shaking himself of whatever thoughts had been moving through his head.  “Your dress has been taken to the cleaners, but my cousin Rachel has some clothes that should fit you, if you’d like.”

Shelby looked down at the sweatpants she was in a shrugged.  “These are fine.  Thank you.”

“No problem,” he set his empty cup in the sink and started to clean up after her breakfast.  “I’ve got to head into town later this morning; can I give you a ride somewhere?  To your car?”

“I can just call a cab, it’s no big deal.”

Justin paused in the middle of wiping down the counter, the tension back in his shoulders.  “I’d prefer to take you into town.  It’s really okay.”  When she didn’t seem to understand what he was getting at, he sighed.  “I don’t need a cabbie calling into the tabloids telling them they picked you up from my house wearing my sweatpants.”

“Oh.”  Well, didn’t she feel stupid.  “Right.”  Justin was silent as he finished cleaning up the kitchen.  Shelby had no idea what to say to him anymore.  Without the courage of alcohol in her system, he was a stranger and difficult to figure out.  Last night it had seemed easy to talk with him, joke with him, and she had no fears.  Now, though, she was at a loss and extremely uncomfortable.  She needed a cigarette.  “Do you have smoke?”

Justin glanced at her, his eyebrows notched in that same, faraway look.  “Yeah, just a second.”  He fumbled around in a drawer, coming up with a battered pack of cigarettes and a lighter.  “I’ll join you.”

He led Shelby through the kitchen and down a hallway, ending up on an outdoor patio.  He lit one for her, handing it over carefully before lighting one and taking a long drag. 

“I thought you were quitting.”  She asked, knowing she’d said it last night but not remembering his answer.

“I thought so, too.”  He grinned, and Shelby was relieved to see it was genuine.  “It’s a hard habit to break, though, and I’m not sure I want to quit just now.” 

“I know how that goes.”  She realized the truth of her statement and was embarrassed, but he let the comment go.  “Thank you, Justin, for everything.  I’m sorry I pulled you into my mess.”

Quietly, he stubbed out his butt, giving her a long glance.  “I seem to have a knack for swooping in at just the right time.  You looked like you needed a hand.” 

She couldn’t quite tell if he was joking, but she went with it anyway.  “In more ways than one, my friend.”

The look he was giving her seemed to tear straight through, and she felt oddly exposed under his intense gaze.  She really didn’t know what to make of this man, and that was unusual for Shelby.  It left her feeling like she was floating, but firmly planted to the spot where she stood.  It was all making her rather dizzy.

Or maybe that was just Justin.

“Are you ready to get going?”  She followed him back into the house, trailing slowly behind.  She didn’t want to go home.

“Yeah, just let me grab my things.”  She ascended the stairs, gripping the banister with more force than necessary.  Going home meant facing her father, and rehashing the fight from last night.  She was twenty-five years old and her father still treated her like a rebellious teenager.  Unfortunately, she still reacted that way, too. 

Without her dress, Shelby only had her small clutch.  So she grabbed that and her heels, padding back down the stairs.  Justin was waiting for her at the bottom.  She glanced down at her bare feet, wiggling her toes against the hardwood.  Justin was watching her, eyebrow raised, and his eyes flitted between her feet and the heels in her hands.

“I’ll just leave them off.”  She finally decided, receiving a smirk in response.

It was bright outside, the sun beating down on her shoulders and enhancing her headache.  She wished she had her sunglasses and a better outfit, but she was limited in her choices at the moment.  If she weren’t so concerned with what she was going to do when she got home, she would try and enjoy the beautiful weather.  Unfortunately, she was too preoccupied with the mess she’d made to think of sunshine.

Once seated in the car, Justin turned to look at her while he started the engine.  “Where to?”

“I took the limo with my dad…so…the Starbucks on Sunset?”  She felt his eyes on her, again, so she explained.  “I’m just going to call my friend to come get me.  I’m not ready to deal with my dad, and I don’t think you want to be seen dropping me off, either.  It’s best if he thinks you’ve stopped hanging out with me.”

It was Justin’s turn to mumble, “oh.”  She could tell that the weight of his decision to help her was really settling in, and she was slightly bothered by his silence.  Her father seemed to creep into every instance of her life, and this was no exception.  Really, they should have been able to laugh last night off and chalk it up to a good time.  But instead, Justin was on edge because her father decided his fate at the record label.  It sucked.

“Don’t worry, he won’t know and things will be fine.”  She let out the breath she’d been holding.  “You’ll be rid of me soon enough and this will all be over.”

“Shelby,” Justin’s voice was low, soft.  It was a different tone.  When he didn’t continue, she decided to end his misery.

“It’s okay, Justin.  You were being a gentleman, you helped me out, and that’s that.  No hard feelings if we’re not best friends now.  I’ll just have a great story to tell my grandkids one day.”  She forced a smile she wasn’t really feeling.  This was not how Shelby usually rolled, and the black cloud that was hanging over her was getting to be too much of a drag.

“That’s not what I was going to say.”  He defended his silence, “I just…the record label has been on my ass lately, and I don’t think pissing the CEO off by getting his daughter shitfaced is the best idea right now.” 

“I get it.”  She sighed.  “I get it.”

“I’m not usually an asshole.”

“And I’m not usually a drunken mess that pukes in a stranger’s car,” she countered, giving him a defiant look.

“Touche.”  He managed a small smile, which made Shelby feel a little bit better.  The rest of the ride was quiet as Justin drove.  Shelby watched him out of the corner of her eye, deciding that she liked him by the way he drove his car.  It was a psychology thing, really, but it was also a personal hobby of hers.  She was a people watcher, and Justin Timberlake was an interesting case study.  He never seemed to sit still.  If his fingers weren’t tapping a beat on the steering wheel, his head was bobbing to the music, or his leg was bouncing slightly.  His grip on the stick shift was casual, and Shelby had a sudden heat flash as she imagined how those hands might caress a lover.  She shook her head away from those thoughts.  She was intrigued, to say the least.

He pulled the car into the lot and put it into park.  He kept it running.  “I’m sorry this is so…informal.”

Shelby shrugged, giving Justin a wide grin.  “Don’t worry.  I’ll be okay.”  She offered him a handshake, which took the singer by surprise.  “Maybe I’ll see you in New York.”  And with that, she stepped out of the car.

Justin hesitated a moment before putting the car into gear and driving away.

 

Roll away your stone, I'll roll away mine

Together we can see what we will find

Don't leave me alone at this time

For I am afraid of what I will discover inside

 

‘Cause you told me that I would find a hole

Within the fragile substance of my soul

And I have filled this void with things unreal

And all the while my character it steals

 

Darkness is a harsh term don't you think?

And yet it dominates the things I seek

 

It seems that all my bridges have been burned

But you say that's exactly how this grace thing works

It's not the long walk home that will change this heart

But the welcome I receive with the restart

                                                “Roll Away Your Stone” Mumford & Sons

 

It had been a strange week, to say the least, and Justin couldn’t help but think back to how it all had started.  Shelby was not what he expected, and he wasn’t quite sure what to make of the girl.  Luckily, Justin had been able to avoid Peter at the record label.  He’d heard from other employees that Shelby had finally gone back to New York, so Peter was now in a much better mood.

 

Justin was still getting a lot of pressure from the label to produce something new, but his brain felt stuck.  In fact, it felt stuck on what Shelby had said to him.  “You need to get out of L.A.” was constantly repeating in his head, and he was fairly convinced that she was right. The idea of leaving resonated with him, and he knew a change in scenery always helped his creativity flow.  Since she’d declared that he needed to get out, it’s all he could think about, and he found himself feeling…itchy and suffocated.  Of course, that left him to decided where he wanted to do…and part of him knew where he was going to choose.

 

Memphis was too quiet and filled with way too many family members that would want to catch up, so it was out.  London seemed like a good idea, getting out of the country might help him focus, but it was far away and he didn’t want to be that out of the loop.  His other option, the one he knew would cause his assistant/cousin to balk, was New York.  It was busy, filled with lots of interesting people and inspirational things, he had his own apartment there, and he knew he could run into some amazing producers that would help him develop some new material.  All of these things were valid reasons to go, but deep down, Justin knew his desire to fly to the east coast was because of one particular person.  That bothered him.

 

It bothered him that when he thought of New York now, he thought about Shelby and wondered if she was okay.  It bothered him that Rachel knew that, too, and she’d been giving him dirty looks since he’d mentioned the move there.  She had reluctantly made the call to have his apartment cleaned and readied for his arrival, still sending him scathing glances.

 

It wasn’t like he was permanently looking to live in the city.  He just needed to escape while he worked on his album, and New York was a very good choice. 

 

His silent fight with Rachel probably would have fizzled out and she would’ve come around if it weren’t for the
“stupid” (that’s her term) thing he did the last time he was in the Label offices.

 

“Hey Marcia, how are you today?”  The secretary was a buxom blond and she blushed profusely anytime Justin even sneezed in her direction.  She was putty in his hands.

 

“Justin!”  That’s about all she could manage to say.  How she worked as a secretary for a major record label if she couldn’t handle herself around celebrities, he’d never know.

 

“I was wondering if you could do me a favor.”  He deliberately lowered his voice and leaned closer to her over the desk.  She was visibly shaking.  “Shelby Edge left some things at my house the other night, but I was a stupid enough to forget to get her phone number.  Could you please look her cell phone up for me so I can call her and return her things?”  He about batted his eyelashes at her, pulling out his saddest puppy dog look.  It was potent.

 

Marcia hesitated, knowing what protocol was, and Justin saw the hesitation.  “I swear I’m not going to hand it out to strangers.  Please, Marcia?  She left some expensive things and I don’t want her to worry about them.” 

 

Deftly, the girl clicked some keys on the computer and scanned the screen.  “Why don’t you just ask Mr. Edge?”  She hesitated again.

 

Justin pretended nonchalance, waiving his hand in the air.  “He’s in a million meetings today and I didn’t want to bother him about anything.  I knew you would be the girl to ask, anyway.”  Here he gave her the million watt smile.  Quickly, she scribbled the number down on a piece of paper and handed it to Justin.  He skirted around the desk, planting a smacking kiss on her cheek.  “You’re the best, Marcia.”  She waved him off.

 

Rachel had found out about his scavenger hunt, and she’d read him the riot act again about getting involved in things that could royally screw his career.  He ignored her, as usual, and decided that New York was the best place to go, and it would be rude of him to avoid Shelby while he was there.  He was just being polite.

 

Shelby Edge was a mess.  He knew that.  He’d witnessed her messiness first hand, and he’d almost stepped in it with her father, who was not a man to cross.  Despite all of that, though, he had this unexplainable urge to hang out with her and see what else she had to show him. 

 

~*~

 

New York was the city that Shelby loved the most.  It was chaos, it was noise, it was people stuffed into tight spaces, but it was freedom.  The people in New York were real, live, in-the-flesh types that told it like it was and didn’t try to bullshit you, unlike L.A., where everyone kissed your ass and talked about you behind your back.  For someone like Shelby who loved to people watch, New York was the ideal place.

 

She was thrilled to be home.

 

Her homecoming was slightly bitter sweet, though, because she’d had a terrible fight with her father right before she’d left.  It was the same old fight, reminding her that she was being frivolous and ridiculous and she should move back to L.A. at once.  That she expected, but then it took a strange turn, and her father had broken down in front of her.  He begged, begged her not to leave him.  He confessed that he wasn’t sure he could handle it alone, now that her mother was gone, and he needed Shelby to stay.

 

It had thrown her for a horrible, terrible loop.  When she told him she couldn’t stay, he said that she was dead to him and to never come back again.

 

It wasn’t the sweetest of partings, to say the least.

 

So now she was back in her favorite city, trying her damnedest to forget that horrible scene and move forward with her life.  She had a feeling that her relationship with her father would never be the same, and it was depressing to think about.  So, she threw herself back into her classes and focused on finishing off the semester.  She was so close to graduating, and then she could focus on making a career for herself and never turning back.

 

Her phone buzzed in her pocket, startling Shelby from her thoughts as she hurried to her next class.  It was a number she didn’t recognize.

 

I took your advice and left L.A. 

 

She stared at the screen, confused.  She offered advice to a lot of different people and she couldn’t quite figure out who could be texting her.  Left L.A.?  And then the memory came flooding back and she laughed out loud, typing in a response.

 

Am I being stalked?

 

It felt like she was holding her breath as she waited for a response.  She couldn’t believe that Justin was texting her after all of the stupid things she’d done.

 

I may have bribed the secretary at RCA to give me your number.

 

The grin that stretched her across Shelby’s face had her feeling like an idiot.  She looked up at the building she was about to head into and paused.  She had a few minutes to get to class, so she plopped herself down on a nearby bench and decided to see what he had to say.

 

I’ve heard rumors that you’re in NYC, but I’m not sure I believe it.

 

The response was quick, so he must have been waiting for her to text back.

 

Well, you spoke so highly of the city before; I figured I’d give it a chance and record my album here.  I might need a tour guide, though.

 

Shelby highly doubted that he needed anything of the sort, but she’d allow him to flirt with her.  She liked the attention.  She was intrigued by this man, especially since she figured he would never want to speak with her again.

 

I know some great people that can help you out with that.

 

You’re funny. was Justin’s reply.

 

She laughed.  I have class until 3.  Can you survive that long?

 

I suppose.  Shelby could hear the playfulness in the text, and she was smiling like an idiot.

 

Sitting through class was going to be tough now, knowing that Justin was waiting for her once she got out.  It struck her as funny, thinking about Justin wanting to see her.  The way he’d reacted to their first encounter, she really didn’t think they’d ever be friends.  He was nice enough, really, being a real gentleman, but still.  He seemed extremely wary of the mess that was Shelby Edge.  She was certainly intrigued.

 

I’ll call you then.

 

She sent the final text, heading into class with a strange lightness in her step.  She just had to make it through a three hour lecture and she’d be all set.

 

~*~

 

While the thought of skipping out on lecture had been in the back of Shelby’s mind, she was happy she hadn’t.  They had a test coming up and a lot of notes were taken today that she would need to know.  Usually she could make up anything she missed, but today was important so it was a good thing she’d stayed. 

 

Now, though, she was curious to see what trouble she could get into with Justin Timberlake. 

 

He’d texted her with his address earlier, so she was on her way to meet up with him.  He lived in a very posh part of New York, of course, but it wasn’t too far from her own apartment.  A few blocks, really, and Shelby enjoyed walking.  She was surprised at how excited she was to know he was just around the corner.  She wasn’t usually star-struck, but hanging out with Justin was a pretty big deal in her book.

 

There was security downstairs, but they were expecting her, so she was let upstairs without any trouble.  Nervously, her knuckles collided with the wood of his door, and she wiped her palms down her jeans as she waited for the door to open.  What was her problem?  She’d already made a drunken fool out of herself in front of him, there was no need to feel nervous now.

 

“Hey!  Glad you could make it.”  Justin’s smiling face greeted her on the other side of the door, and she couldn’t help but grin back.

 

“Hey yourself.”  He ushered her inside, taking her jacket and leading her into the kitchen.  The apartment was beautiful, but after seeing his house in L.A., she expected nothing less.  “You have a great place here.”

 

“Thanks.  It’s been a while since I’ve been in New York, but it’s cool to be back.  It’s a nice change of pace.”

 

Shelby smiled smugly.  “I told you so.”  She’d always wanted to say that to someone.  Justin stuck his tongue out at her.  “So, Mr. Timberlake, I was pretty surprised when you texted me earlier.  I didn’t really expect to see you again.”

 

Justin shrugged, grabbing to beers from his fridge and setting out a bowl of popcorn.  “What you said to me made a lot of sense, and the more my cousin nagged at me about leaving you alone, the more I wanted to hang out with you just to spite her.”

 

Shelby raised an eyebrow, surprised at his candor.  “Well, I’m not sure I want to be on your cousin’s bad side, but I’m glad you’re here.”

 

“She’s a kitten, really.  She’ll be fine.  Besides, I’m here to record my album.  It’s entirely a coincidence that you’re here and we’re hanging out.”  His grin was impish, and Shelby liked this side of him.  It was new and unguarded.  It seemed that being out of L.A. was already helping him out.

 

“So, what would you like to do tonight?”

 

He stuffed a handful of popcorn in his mouth, washing it down with a swig of beer before answering.  “You tell me, tour guide.  What is there to do in New York?”

 

Shelby waited for him to smirk or laugh, showing that he was kidding, but when he kept looking at her with that expectant stare in his eyes, she knew he was serious.  “Really?  You want me to be a tour guide?  Haven’t you been here a million times before?”

 

The expectant look turned sheepish and his grin was small.  “I’ve seen a ton of studios, radio stations, and morning shows.  I’ve been here for performances and tours, but I’ve never really had the chance to explore.  I’d kind of like to look around without having a schedule to get back to, or a meeting waiting on the other end of things.”  His blue eyes crashed into her browns.  “You seem like the perfect person.”

 

The statement was said in a causal way, completely in line with the topic of conversation, but Shelby still felt a shiver skitter down her spine.  This man was potent.

 

“Well, I’m starving, and I know this amazing little hole-in-the-wall place that has the best chicken and waffles.  Want to check it out?”

 

“Chicken and waffles?”  His glance was skeptical, but he stood and took her beer, putting it in the sink and leading her out of the kitche.

 

“Yes, you’re a southern boy, you should know chicken and waffles.”  She playfully pushed at his shoulder as they made their way back to the front door.

 

“Oh, I know chicken and waffles, girlfriend.  I’m just doubting that you do.”  He bumped her with his elbow, grinning as they took the elevator.  “I thought this was a tour of New York.”

 

“Oh, it is.  We’re the great melting pot, remember?  We do Southern just as well as we do everything else.  You’ll see.”  She followed him through the lobby, surprised to see a car waiting out front for them.  He opened the passenger door for her, helping her into the car before getting into the driver’s side.  “You have everything all planned out, don’t you?”  She asked him.

 

“Well, almost everything.  I have no idea where we’re going.”  He confessed, smiling over at her.

 

Shelby laughed, “Yeah, there’s that.  You’re also going to have some trouble finding a parking spot, too.”

 

Lend me your hand and we'll conquer them all

But lend me your heart and I'll just let you fall

Lend me your eyes I can change what you see

But your soul you must keep, totally free

                “Awake My Soul” Mumford & Sons

 

Shelby slammed back the shot, feeling the burn of the whisky as it travelled down into her stomach.  She was pleasantly warmed by the alcohol.   With a thud, she planted the glass on the table and grinned over at Justin.  She was close to being drunk, but past the point of merely buzzy.  It was a very enjoyable feeling, and she knew there would be no awkward interruptions from her father to ruin the moment.

 

“Shit, girl, you’re making me look like a pussy.”  Justin slurred slightly, eyeing his beer with crossed eyes.  They’d being going shot for shot, Justin convinced that he would be able to drink Shelby under the table, but she’d proven to be a tougher opponent than he originally thought.  “I don’t think I can take another shot.”

 

A sculpted eyebrow arched in his direction.  “Justin Timberlake,”  Shelby’s words were mush, but he easily understood her.  “You are such a light-weight.”  As if to prove it, she finished off the rest of his beer, too. 

 

Drinking was probably not the best idea for either of them, but it was difficult for Shelby to stop herself.  Plus, they were huddled up together in a dark corner of Sylvia’s and no one had even noticed they were there.  Justin had commented that it wasn’t a true Southern meal without whiskey, and Shelby said she could “out-drink his skinny ass” any day, which landed them in their current situation.

 

Happily, giddily drunk.

 

“Fuck, I’m getting old.”  He settled back in his chair, unsteadily pushing away the bottle of liquor and hoping to gain back some of his senses.  They still needed to get home.  He had a driver on call twenty-four seven, so he knew it wouldn’t be a huge deal, but he also knew that being hung over was a bitch he didn’t want to play with.  “We should slow down.”

 

Shelby hiccupped, swaying in her seat.  “I am perfectly fine.”  She stated, doing her best to look Justin square in the eyes but failing miserably.  The three of him wouldn’t sit still.  “I could go another five rounds.”  Her boast was followed by a very un-lady like burp.  Justin wondered briefly if he’d been mistaken thinking Shelby was a girl.  She must be more of a man than he and Trace combined.

 

“I think you’re full of shit, is what you are.”  He managed to wave the waitress over and get a couple of glasses of water, which he gratefully downed when they arrived.  If he drank anymore, he would pass out soon, and that wasn’t what he wanted to do.  “You know, B, you’re the worst best tour guide I’ve ever had.”  When she gave him a strange look he elaborated.  “You’ve only taken me to one place, but you’ve managed to impress the shit out of me.”

 

“I never said the tour was over.”

 

Justin sat back, a slight grin on his face.  He liked this girl.  She was funny, smart, and she could certainly hold her liquor.  He was still a little uncertain about her, because he could tell he was hiding behind this bright persona, but she seemed to have herself together much more than when they’d first met.  Maybe his first instincts had been wrong. 

 

“I doubt you could walk yourself to the door right now, how the hell are you going to take me on a tour of the city?”

 

“I have my ways.”  She waved her hands around in demonstration, almost knocking herself out of her chair.  Justin held back his laugh as long as he could, but when she attempted to scowl at him, he couldn’t help the guffaw that burst forth.  She flipped him off.

 

“Maybe we should postpone the rest of our tour so you can sleep this off.”  He felt his own head swim and amended his statement, “and I can, too.  Shit.”  He pinched the bridge of his nose, already knowing that his hangover was going to be epic.  When the pressure behind his eyes subsided, he pulled out his phone and texted Greg, his security and driver while he was here in New York.  Their ride would be there shortly, so Justin waived for the check and glanced back over at Shelby.

 

“What?”  She could hardly look at him straight.

 

“You’re not going to puke in my car again, are you?”  He tried to keep the grin from showing, but when the shock and embarrassment registered on her face, he lost it.  Shelby didn’t think it was a very funny joke at all, but she was really drunk and Justin’s laughter was amusing, and contagious. 

 

“I hate you, I think.”  She stated, calming herself down and reaching for her purse when the check came.  Justin was about to protest, grabbing his own wallet.  “No, no.  I’m the tour guide, I pay.”  She gave him a cheeky grin.  “You can pay next time.”

 

The car ride home was fairly uneventful as far as puking passengers went.  But Justin realized, yet again, that he didn’t know where Shelby lived so he could drop her off, and she was currently passed out and drooling on his shoulder.  He tried to wake her up, shaking her gently, but she only snored louder and adjusted her head.  He sighed.

 

“I guess just drop us off at my place, Greg.  I can’t get her to wake up.”  The look his driver gave him spoke volumes to Justin, but nothing more was said as they left Harlem and headed back toward Justin’s apartment in Soho. 

 

Even in his drunken haze, thoughts about what he was doing with Shelby roiled loudly through his mind.  He knew that she was trouble, it was easy to see that, but he wasn’t sure that trouble was always a bad thing.  He’d had a lot of fun with her tonight.  She was really easy to talk to, laid back, and she looked at him in a way that he wanted to see over and over.  He couldn’t quite put words to it, but there was something in her eyes, something that made him sure their budding friendship was a good idea.  Plus, she somehow sparked his creativity and song lyrics were tumbling around in his head already.  It was incredible.

 

Coming to New York was almost a whim, but he’d been drawn here for a reason, he knew that.  Maybe it was to get to know this woman better.  Maybe it was because he needed a muse and the city was a great place for that.  Whatever the reason, Justin was glad he’d come.

 

His thoughts were interrupted by Greg pulling up to Justin’s apartment, idling outside the back entrance.  “I don’t think she’s going to wake up, J.”  Greg was a master of the obvious.

 

“I’ll just carry her in.  Can you get the doors for me?”  Together the two men managed to get Shelby on the elevator and into Justin’s apartment without too much hassle.  She did accidentally hit her head once (Justin blamed the slowness of the elevator doors for that one) but other than that incident, they made it back unscathed.  With a feeling akin to déjà vu, Justin slipped Shelby’s jeans off carefully, attempting to get her situated in his guest bedroom.

 

“This is not part of the tour, Timberlake.”  She grumbled as he finally removed the denim from her legs.  Through half-lidded eyes, she watching him undress her.  “Are you going to take my top off, too?”

 

Justin smirked.  “You’re going to pass out in a moment here, even if I wanted to take advantage of the situation, you wouldn’t be conscious to experience it.”

 

She snorted out a laugh.  “That would be a shame.”  Letting out a long sigh, she closed her eyes and rested her head back against the pillows.  “When we have sex, Timberlake, I’m going to be awake and fully conscious.” 

 

Justin chuckled, deciding to not respond to her comment as he crept out of the room, shutting the door softly.  He was going to take a nice, long shower, and then he was going to follow Shelby’s lead and pass out.  Hopefully the hangover they would share wouldn’t be too terrible.

 

~*~

 

Bright lights.  Bright, blinding, painful light. 

 

Those were the thoughts that Shelby first managed to understand as she swam up towards consciousness.  Her head was pounding, and she felt as if her mouth were stuffed with cotton.

 

“Shit.”  She grumbled, cracking open an eye to see where that terrible light was coming from.  Instantly, she noted that she wasn’t in her own apartment.  Wracking her sluggish brain, she found what she was looking for.  Memories of shots chased by beers with Justin Timberlake floated through her brain.  Well, she’d done it again.

 

At least this time she hadn’t puked in his car.  She thought.

 

With no urgency, Shelby found her jeans and tugged them on.  She found a sweatshirt hanging in a closet, so she pulled that on over her head, exiting the room and meandering down the hallway.  Amazing smells were wafting from the kitchen, so she followed her nose.  Squinting fiercely at the massive amounts of sunlight that were streaming in through the windows, Shelby found Justin at the stove, cooking bacon in a skillet. 

 

“You’re starting to make a habit of this, B.”  His voice was amused and he turned from the bacon to grin at her.  “How’s the hang over?”

 

“Shitty.”  She grumbled.  She grabbed Justin’s coffee mug, already filled to the brim, and started to take long, grateful sips.  “You make awesome coffee, Timberlake.”  Her eyes finally adjusted to the light, but her head was still throbbing to an erratic cadence.

 

“Sure, drink my coffee while I slave over your breakfast.” 

 

“You weren’t drinking it, so I figured it was okay if I did.”  Gingerly, she sat at one of the barstools and watching Justin cook.  “How bad was I last night?”  She knew that they’d gone out to dinner, but after finishing off Justin’s beer, she had no memory of what had happened.  Shelby really needed to stop getting so drunk like that.

 

“You mean you don’t remember?”  His voice was full of shock and surprise, which made Shelby cringe.  Something must have happened.

 

“Nope, not after leaving the restaurant.”

 

Justin scoffed.  “Sheesh.  You’d think sex like we had last night would at least be memorable.”

 

Shelby spit the sip she’d just taken, sending it flying across the kitchen counter.  “Sex?” 

 

“Yeah, sex.  You could hardly contain yourself in the car, and when we got into the elevator you attacked me.  I can show you the scratches.”  He started to lift his shirt, and Shelby held up a hand, the other going to her forehead.

 

“We had sex?”  The thought just didn’t seem to compute in her foggy brain.  “I really got that drunk that I don’t remember having sex…with you?”

 

Laughter shook Justin’s shoulders and his face started to turn and interesting shade of red as he tried to breathe.  Pointing the spatula in her direction, he managed to get breath enough to cough out, “gottcha.”  More laughter shook his lean frame as he watched the color on Shelby’s face drain.

 

“You bastard!”  She threw the nearest thing to her, aiming for his head but missing.  The orange thudded into the refrigerator, landing heavily on the floor.  “I can’t believe you would make shit like that up!”

 

Chuckles still escaped as Justin plated up the bacon, bringing everything over to Shelby on the counter.  Pancakes were already done, and there was a bowl of sliced fruit, too.  “Really, B, you opened yourself up to it.”  He grinned at the scowl on her face.  “And you offered, too.  I mean, I was just trying to be a gentleman and make you comfortable so you could pass out, but you wanted me to take your top off, too.”

 

“Are you just giving me shit again?”  She didn’t trust anything he said at the moment.

 

Justin held up a hand, “Scouts honor.  And you told me, and I quote, ‘When we have sex I’m going to be conscious.’”  He was highly enjoying the discomfort she was experiencing.  This was too much fun.

 

Shelby groaned and rested her head against the counter.  “That does sound like something I might say.”  With a puff of air, she glanced up at him.  “Don’t let me get drunk like that again, Timberlake.”

 

He shoved a piece of bacon at her.  “Eat.  And I make no promises.  It’s pretty amusing to watch your hang over in the morning, even if you can out-drink me.”

 

She chewed fiercely.  “I hate you.”

 

Justin just grinned in response.  He shifted his focus to his breakfast and ate intently.  To be truthful, he was feeling pretty shitty this morning, too.  Unfortunately, whenever he was hung over he could never sleep long, so he’d been up for a couple of hours.  He took a run on the treadmill to try and sweat some of the alcohol out of his system, and he’d already had two cups of coffee by the time Shelby had woken up. 

 

“What’s on the agenda for today, tour guide?”  He asked when he’d polished off the majority of his food.

 

“You really want me to keep taking you around the city?  I’m a horrible tour guide, Justin.”  She picked at her food, munching at a crispy piece of bacon.  “And I feel like shit warmed over, too.”

 

“Well, I do have to go into the studio for a little bit today.  You wanna come with?”

 

Brown eyes stared into blue, confusion apparent.  “You still want to hang out with me after I got pass-out drunk for the second time?  I mean, the only two times we’ve actually hung out I’m unconscious in your guest bed.”

 

Justin laughed, clearing away the dishes.  “I like you, B.  I think you’re fascinating, and you’re not the first girl to get passed out drunk with me, really.  Plus, there won’t be any alcohol at the studio, so we’ll be safe.”

 

Shelby was interested by his honesty, this moment much different than that first time in his kitchen.  Here he was relaxed, laughing, and seemed genuinely interested in spending more time with her.  She was glad for it.  She liked Justin, too, and she had a lot of fun with him.  She just hoped she could stop herself from getting drunk like that again.  It was starting to become a trend that she wasn’t sure she liked.

 

“All right, Timberlake.  I’ll come with you to the studio, but you better be damn impressive for me to fight this hang over to spend time with you.”  Her comment received another chuckle.

 

“I’ll do my best.” 

 

 

And there will come a time, you'll see, with no more tears.

And love will not break your heart, but dismiss your fears.

Get over your hill and see what you find there,

With grace in your heart and flowers in your hair.

"After the Storm" Mumford & Sons 

 

Shelby had been around musicians her entire life.  She knew music, even if she didn’t want to make it her profession.  She’d watched brainstorming processes, production, recording, finishing…all of it.  It was safe for her to say that nothing really surprised her in the studio anymore, but now…

 

Now she knew she’d been wrong.

 

Watching Justin Timberlake work was like watching the sun rise and set, or the seasons change, or the tides turn.  He was such a natural behind those boards or in the booth, Shelby couldn’t take her eyes off of him. 

 

After begging him to stop at Dunkin’ Donuts for her caffeine fix, Shelby had settled herself on one of the leather couches behind the board, sinking into the corner and hoping to go unnoticed.  She could always take a nap if things got too boring, is what she’d thought.  She’d seen all of this before.  She’d even been the one mixing the tracks and helping with the recording.  This was going to be an easy day where she could sleep off her hang over while lending moral support to Justin as he worked.

 

Twenty minutes into her snuggle, all previous thoughts flew out the window and Shelby sat at attention.

 

Justin was incredible.  Watching him was an experience Shelby didn’t know existed, and it really didn’t hurt that he was damn sexy when he was singing.  She could now see why millions of girls threw themselves at him on a daily basis.  The man was sex on a platter. 

 

“I’m gonna get in the booth again.”  Justin’s voice broke through Shelby’s drooling, and she looked up to spot him smirking at her.  “Have I bored you to death yet, B?”

 

She shook her head.  She didn’t really trust herself to speak at the moment, considering she was probably going to say something really stupid.  She would never make fun of a screaming JT fan again.  (Maybe).

 

She watched him saunter back into the booth, a fresh track having just been created.  The producer in the room was someone new, but he had some amazing beats and melodies put together which seemed to spark some sort of creativity in Justin.  He had penned lyrics without much effort, and then he went into the booth and rattled off a verse or two, an incredible hook, and a chorus that had her singing along before he was even done.  She’d never seen anything like it, and suddenly she understood how this man could sell so many records and charm the world.  He was a genius musician.  He knew beats, he knew chords and keys, and he knew melodies.  He knew rhymes and rhythms and how to twist words to make them fit into some complicated sequence.  He layered his voice and managed to make it sound natural and not manufactured. 

 

Shelby was in awe.

 

“So, are you ready to run away screaming yet?”  Justin came over to Shelby, sitting next to her on the couch and wrapping an arm around her shoulders.  He was grinning ear to ear.  He knew that she was a puddle at his feet.

 

“Actually, I think I could watch you make music all day.”  She blushed at her confession.  His closeness was flustering her, but she liked it.

 

“Well, you’ll have to come back again sometime.”  He hugged her close.  “It was pretty cool to have you with me today.”  Suddenly, he seemed shy.  “I like being around you, B.”

 

The blush crept higher.  “Why do you call me B?”  It hadn’t occurred to ask him until now.

 

“I don’t know.  Shel-by.  B.  It just seemed to fit you.”  He ran a hand over his head, ducking down for a moment before looking back into her eyes.  Shelby felt a shiver trace her spine.  “Shelby seems too tame for a girl like you.”

 

An eyebrow raise was all the response he got.  Truthfully, Shelby didn’t know what to say to that.  Things were starting to make a strange turn and she wasn’t sure what that meant, but she was oddly okay with it all.  Being with Justin made her feel happy.  For a while now she’d been walking in this fog, stunned by the death of her mother and unsure of how to act around her father.  But now, now she felt like herself again and Justin seemed to be the cause.  She wanted to explore that.  She wanted to see where else he could take her.

 

He was a very enchanting human being, and Shelby liked that.

 

“Should I start calling you J?  Or maybe Tin?”  Her grin stretched wider when Justin’s eyes squinted in mock annoyance. 

 

“See now, you’re just being mean.”  His pout was adorable and seemed to fit quite naturally on his face.  Shelby figured he had had lots of practice using it. 

 

“Careful, if you make that face long enough it just might stay that way.”  She reached over to pinch his cheek, grinning at the expression on his face.  “Well, JT, as much as I’ve enjoyed watching you work today, I do have some work to do for my classes.”

 

Justin shook his head.  “You can’t go, I’m holding you hostage.” 

 

“Hostage?  I hope you’re not looking to get money out of anyone for my safe return.” 

 

Justin managed to look disappointed.  “No?  You don’t think anyone would give me a couple thousand for you?”  He seemed to contemplate that a moment.  “All right then, I suppose you can go.”

 

Shelby smacked his arm.  “Now who’s being mean?” 

 

Their flirting was a strange thing for Shelby, but she wasn’t going to shy away.  Having his attention on her like this was making her quite warm and fuzzy inside.

 

“Do you need a ride or something?  I can have Greg take you home.”  The teasing seemed to be over for now, a true look of concern on Justin’s face as he tried to find a way to take care of Shelby.  If he kept this up much longer, she was going to be putty in his hands.

 

“No, Justin.  I’m fine.  It’s the city and there are cabs crawling around like cockroaches.  I’ll make it home.”

 

He didn’t seem to like that answer much.  “Are you sure?  It’s not a big deal; Greg doesn’t have anything else to do, anyway.”  Shelby shook he head and waved off his offer again.  He shrugged and conceded.  “Okay.  Well, at least call me later?  If you don’t, I’m going to assume you’ve been mugged by some desperate, crazy person and you’ve been left in a ditch someplace.  That worry can’t be good for my heart.”  He pressed a hand against his chest to emphasize his point, the pout back on his face.

 

Shelby laughed and leaned over to kiss his cheek lightly.  “I’ll text you when I make it home and I’ll call you once I get through some work.  How does that sound?”

 

“Good.  If you don’t, I’m going to call you incessantly until you answer, and then I’m going to insist on coming over to make sure you’re all right.”  Even with the light tone to his voice, Shelby could tell he was serious.  Things were certainly getting interesting.

 

“Got it.”  She stood, offering a wave to the others in the room before giving Justin another kiss on the cheek.  He hugged her tightly.  “I’ll talk to you later, JT.”  When the door to the studio closed behind her, she took a long breath and let it out slowly. 

 

What was going on here?

 

She wasn’t really in a place to be having fuzzy feelings for Justin Timberlake.  She was in the middle of getting her masters in psychology, which meant she had to be completely focused on her studies right now.  Also, she’d just lost her mother and her father was absent and distant.  What was she thinking?  Really, she should be smarter than this.  And any of her psych friends would tell her she’s using Justin as a distraction and that means he’ll become a crutch and whatever foundation they might build will just crumble because she’s not ready for a relationship right now.

 

But hot damn, if he didn’t get her all hot and bothered. 

 

Maybe it was just attraction.  Maybe this thing that was brewing was all physical and they’d end up enjoying each other’s company without any strings attached or any expectations.  He was busy with his own endeavors and his time in New York was probably a lot shorter than she would like, which meant anything serious couldn’t really happen. 

 

Shelby stopped and shook her head.  She was completely over complicating things at the moment.

 

Just because there was a little sexual tension on her part didn’t mean she needed to start analyzing every little move the man made.  Plus, he was probably just being a gentleman when he asked for her to call him when she got home.  He seemed like the type of guy to care about those things.

 

Shelby forced her brain to leave Justin Timberlake alone and focus on hailing a cab.  It was getting rainy and she didn’t want to have to walk home if the weather turned.  That, and she needed to shift her brain to thinking about her school work and her classes.  This was an important semester for her; her last.  Graduation was months away and she didn’t want to let off now.  Tonight she had to put together her notes and study for the test she had coming up.  It was a pretty difficult class and there was a lot riding on this exam.  Shelby had the feeling that it was going to be a long night.

 

And she would have to do her damnedest to not think about the man she just left behind.

 

Home was a cozy apartment on the outskirts of Soho.  She’d found it a few years ago, and it was love at first sight.  Her father, of course, hadn’t approved of it, but she decided to buy it anyway.  He thought she needed something larger, more expensive, and more his style.  She didn’t want his charity.  That was just one more black mark on her record in his eyes.  She’d given up trying to please him a long time ago.  It wasn’t worth the heartache.

 

Her relationship with her father hadn’t always been so rocky.  When she was a little girl, they were inseparable.  Her Daddy was wrapped around her little finger, and she adored him unconditionally.  Together they would go on adventures; hikes, theme parks, movie dates, studio time, everything.  He wanted to give her the world and she wanted to experience it.  Somehow, though, as she grew older, they started to drift apart.  She wanted to discover things on her own, and he couldn’t seem to let her go.  Her decisions weren’t the right ones, or they weren’t good enough.  He was too controlling and demanding.  They started to bicker constantly, their conversations filled with sarcastic barbs and nasty undertones.  Her mother tried her best to play referee, but it wasn’t futile.  The damage had been done when Shelby decided to move to New York and not pursue music. 

 

Things had only gotten worse.

 

Shelby didn’t like the turn things had taken with her father.  She missed him, especially now that her mother was gone.  But she didn’t know how to fix it.  She wasn’t going to give up her passions and her dreams because he didn’t think it was the best thing for her. 

 

It was easier to be in New York.  Here, she was able to forget everything else and let the city take her over. 

 

And now that Justin was here, things were looking much brighter.

 

With a sigh, she stepped into her apartment and dropped her bag to the floor.  It was a relief to be home.  She was tired and still slightly hung over from last night.  She decided to take a hot shower and the pour herself a glass of wine.  A little hair of the dog that bit her might help relieve her headache and help her relax.  Plus, wine always made studying more bearable. 

 

She grabbed her phone, texting Justin as she had promised.  His response was instant.

 

Took you long enough, B. 

 

She smirked.  Liar.  It took me twenty minutes.  You probably didn’t even notice I was gone.

 

It was a minute or two before her phone buzzed again. 

 

I can’t stop thinking about you.

 

Shelby stared at her phone, not sure how to take that last message.  She had no expectations for anything happening, but she couldn’t deny the butterflies.  With a text like that, she was suddenly wondering if she could hope for something more.

 

Getting any studying done tonight was going to be a bitch.  

 

 

As the winter winds litter London with lonely hearts

Oh the warmth in your eyes swept me into your arms

Was it love or fear of the cold that led us through the night?

For every kiss your beauty trumped my doubt

 

And my head told my heart

"Let love grow"

            Mumford & Sons – “Winter Winds”

 

 

Vaguely, a sound wormed its way into Shelby’s unconscious mind.  Her dreams were garbled and erratic, and a heavy, thudding rhythm started to overtake her thoughts.  Slowly, with reluctance, she swam to the surface of consciousness. 

 

Again, the pounding sounded.  Perhaps it wasn’t in her head at all.

 

With a groan, Shelby rolled over and eyed the clock.  Seven am, too early, by her standards.  When another round of knocks rattled her sleep-laden brain, she threw off the covers and stood on shaky legs.  “Christ, I’m coming.”  With a weary glance she found a sweatshirt to throw on her slender frame and angrily stomped through the living room and into the small hallway that housed her front door.

 

Swinging the portal open, Shelby shouldn’t have been surprised by her early visitor.  Really, she was half expecting this, but her brain was too foggy to comprehend what she was seeing.

 

Justin Timberlake held up a bag in one hand and a carrier with two Starbucks cups in the other.  “I bring a peace offering.  Don’t kill me for waking you up.”  His grin was wide, boyish, and Shelby felt her anger receding as she became more awake.

 

“Seven AM, Jus?  Really?”  She scowled as best she could, but he thrust a warm cup into her hands and pushed past her into the apartment.  Apparently he was going to ignore the fact that he’d just woken her up.  Groggily, Shelby followed Justin into her kitchen.  She sipped the drink he’d given her, surprised to taste something other than coffee.  “What is this?”

 

“Chai.  Starbucks makes the best Chai tea, and I have them make it with soy milk and no water.  It’s amazing.  Drink.”  He gently pushed the cup back to her lips.  She took another sip, enjoying the warm, spicy taste of the tea.  Okay, she could forgive him for the lack of coffee.

 

“What are you doing here?  Shouldn’t you be in bed, like the rest of the world?”

 

Justin gave Shelby a bland look.  “I have to be in the studio all day today, and I wanted to see you.  So, I figured I would brave your wrath and bring you breakfast.  He opened the bag he’d brought, lifting out scones and setting them on a plate he’d found.  “Sit, eat.”  He motioned to the chair he’d pulled out for her.  He then opened her fridge and pulled out a container of sliced melon and other fruits and placed that on the table.

 

Shelby eyed him carefully but sat down, sipping at her tea and taking the offered scone.  If she’d been more awake, she would’ve admitted how amazing this was and that he was doing a pretty good job of wooing her, but she was still to groggy to say much more than, “thanks.”

 

“So, what do you have to do today, B?”  Justin spread butter across his own scone, his blue eyes piercing into hers when he looked up.  Those eyes were lethal.

 

Shelby swallowed hard.  “Uhm, I have my exam at 3:30.  I was going to attempt to study some more, but mostly I was going to sleep.”  She narrowed her eyes, “Well, that was the plan until someone busted down my door.”

 

Justin’s Cheshire grin was adorable, but she wasn’t about to tell him that.  “C’mon, B, you know you love seeing me.”  He batted his eyelashes at her, chuckling when he noticed the rosy hue to her cheeks. “Girl, you’re blushing.”

 

Shelby’s response was to throw a piece of her scone at his head.  The bread hit him on the cheek, and after he flinched in surprise, his eyes popped open wide.  Quickly, he threw his own pastry at her, landing it in the nest of her hair.  Shelby shrieked, eyes searching frantically for some other ammo to throw.  The bowl of fruit sat between them, innocuous and innocent, and a handy food-fight instrument.  Both of their hands snatched toward the bowl at the same time, grabbing handfuls of strawberries, melons, and an assortment of other squishy, sticky substances.

 

Justin stood slowly, inching his way toward Shelby who was also moving from her chair.  They circled the table, eyeing the other with a predatory gaze.

 

Shelby broke first, flinging her fistful of melon across the table, missing Justin as he ducked out of the way.  The splatter painted the refrigerator with colorful streaks.

 

“You missed.”  His smirk was devilish, but Shelby could only focus on his hand, poised for flight.  Justin feinted to the left and then quickly dashed right, catching his prey off-guard.  Within seconds, she was in his arms, all matter of fruit being smashed into her face and hair, sticky juices dripping down her neck.

 

“Justin!”  The shrill scream had Justin cringing, but he didn’t loosen his grip on the squirming girl.  Shelby managed to pull some of the mess off of her face and smear it across Justin’s t-shirt, but he had definitely bested her in this food fight.  “You are such an ass.”  She managed to pull away, moving across to the sink to attempt to wash herself.

 

“Hey!  Is that any way to talk to the man that brought you breakfast?”  Justin seemed unfazed by the gooey mess he’d made of Shelby’s kitchen and self.  Instead, his arms were folded as he leaned casually against her table.  His eyes were smoldering.  Shelby suddenly felt hot, but she ignored the feeling as best she could.

 

“It certainly is, if the man managed to cover me in said breakfast.”  Carefully, she pushed her hair back and grimaced when a piece of strawberry slid down her neck.  “Oh, gross.”

 

Justin moved from his perch, closing the gap between them quickly.  “C’mere.”  He tugged at her sweatshirt and pulled their bodies flush together.  “You’ve got something…here…”  His thumb swiped at her cheek, bringing the digit up to his mouth to suck off the juices.  Shelby gulped.  She was suddenly aware that she was still only in her sweatshirt and her bare legs felt awfully exposed in this moment.

 

There was a long, tense second where their eyes searched each other, searing heat flashing through their bodies.  Slowly, ever so slowly, Justin brought his face within a breath of Shelby’s, teasing her with their closeness but not moving the rest of the distance.  Her eyes had drooped closed as he’d started to lean, but now they opened in frustration at the lack of contact.  Roughly, she grabbed the back of his neck and pulled his mouth to hers.  Their kiss was sticky and sweetened by the fruit cocktail covering Shelby.  This made it all the more erotic. 

 

“You taste like strawberries.”  Justin breathed into Shelby’s mouth before he dove in for another kiss.  His arms wrapped securely around her back, lifting her small frame up into the air until she settled her legs around his waist.  “Bedroom.”  He commanded, moving them from the kitchen.

 

“Door on the left.”  Shelby nodded with her head, capturing his mouth as soon as the directions had been uttered.  Easily, Justin carried her down the short hallway, turning them into the room she’d directed.  Their mouths devoured each other hungrily, hands desperate for skin and contact.  “Shower.”  Shelby managed to get the request out between kisses.  When she’d managed drop from his arms and steer them into the bathroom, her hands frantically ripped at Justin’s shirt.

 

He had recently discovered a span of legs, barely covered by the hem of her sweatshirt.  His pulse raced through his veins as his hands roamed up her thighs and he touched the hot skin of her waist.  Desire pulled at him, and he couldn’t get her naked fast enough.  His tongue traced a trail on her neck, tasting the fruit on her skin.  He was completely aroused.

 

Shelby managed to turn long enough to get the shower started before Justin had spun her around again to capture her lips again.  The final piece of clothing to leave their bodies were Justin’s boxers, and Shelby took her time appreciating the exposed flesh now fully in her view.  She smirked at Justin, who growled low in his throat before grabbing her hips roughly and pulling her into the shower with him.  Both of them gasped when the water hit their bodies.  Shelby fumbled with the dial, turning up the temperature. 

 

“B…c’mere.”  Slowly, with the lightest of touches, Justin traced his fingers across Shelby’s collar bone, down between the valley of her breasts and lower toward her stomach.  He stopped at her hips, letting her hip bone guide the direction of his travels, and soon he found himself dipping into her wetness and heat.  “Damn, girl.” 

 

“Oh…”  Shelby’s head fell back as her hands gripped tightly to Justin’s arms to steady her shaking legs.  His torturous ministrations had her writhing against him, wishing for more.  “J…please…”  She was close to begging.

 

Without stopping, Justin leaned into Shelby and let his lips suck on her neck and jaw line.  He could feel her body reacting to his touch, quivering and wanting, pulling him into her.  His own arousal ached with need, but he was determined to push Shelby over the edge before he got what he was truly after.  “Come for me, baby girl.”  His breath was hot on her neck, and when he pressed his thumb against her clit, she let out a moan.  Her head fell against his shoulder as her body tightened around his fingers.

 

“Shit.”  She panted, her eyes hazy with lust as she looked up at him.

 

Justin took her mouth with his, biting at her bottom lip.  Gently, he pushed her against the shower wall and lifted her leg so it sat around his hip.  His stare was smoldering as he situated himself, sinking the length of him into her heat.  “Fuck.”  He settled deep inside of her, stilling when their bodies were completely flush together.  Shelby started to pepper kisses along Justin’s shoulder, nipping at his ear-lobe and wiggling her hips to get him moving.

 

“Justin…” She breathed, gripping his shoulders.  “Please.”  That was all it took.  Justin gripped Shelby’s thigh and pulled it higher on his hip, his other hand around her back to keep her close.  He started slowly, torturing her with his leisurely pace.  Her hips bucked against his, creating a glorious friction that had her letting out a string of curses.  He felt incredible, filling, stretching, and touching spots that had never been found before.

 

Once Shelby started, Justin couldn’t hold his slow pace anymore, and he thrust into her, burying the entirety of him as far as it would go.  Quickly, he pulled back out before slamming into her again.  Rapidly, their pace increased until their breaths came in short pants and both of them were whispering nonsense.

 

“I’m gonna come again…”  Her words spurred Justin to move faster, and he slipped his free hand between them.  Her release was instant.  As she tightened around him, Justin felt his own climax coming.  He thrust again, and one last time, sinking deep into her soft center as he body shook.  It was so intense, he had to lean his head against Shelby’s shoulder to keep from falling over, using the wall as support.

 

“Shit, B.”  Justin licked his lips, slowly lifting his head to grin lazily at her.  “That was incredible.”

 

Her eyes were closed and her head was leaning back against the wall, but she answered.  “I’m still mad at you for the fruit in my hair.”

 

His chuckle had them both shuddering because he was still buried inside of her, still sensitive.  Carefully, he pulled out; taking a moment to be sure he could stand steadily.  “Then I’ll help you wash it out.”

 

Together, they washed up, taking their time to explore each other.  After, Justin pulled his clothing back on as Shelby moved into her bedroom to get dressed for the day.  Her head was still swimming and her body was thrumming with the events that had just happened.  The sexual tension had been obvious between them before, but she hadn’t realized that they could ignite so easily.  Now, she was so completely aware of his presence, his movement, his body, and his lips…all of him.  She could hardly take her eyes off of him as he stood in the doorway, watching her get dressed.

 

“I’m not going to be able to study today, thanks to you.”  As she finished buttoning her shirt, she gave him a mock glare.

 

 

Justin put up his hands in surrender.  “I’ll have no trouble in the studio today, thanks to you.”  His grin was trouble, and he laughed when Shelby swatted his shoulder. 

 

“When do you have to leave to go in?”  She left the room, heading back toward the kitchen to clean up and actually get something to eat.  Justin followed, helping her wipe up the mess he’d created.

 

“I have to be in around eleven.”

 

Shelby stopped in the middle of wiping off the refrigerator.  “Eleven?  You woke me up at seven when you don’t have to be in until eleven?” 

 

“Well…yeah…”  Justin stammered, “but it was totally worth it, right?”  He faltered under intense gaze, feeling like he’d done something terribly wrong.

 

She smirked.  “Gotcha.”  She squealed when Justin grabbed her by the waist, tickling her sides and laughing as she begged him to stop.  Eventually, the tickling ended in some stolen kisses and touches.  The heat between them was palpable.

 

Justin pulled back from a particularly long kiss and took a breath.  “Jesus, I feel like a teenager again.”  Shelby laughed with him, stepping away to take care of a few more things in the kitchen.  “I think you should come with me to the studio.”

 

“Really?”  Shelby took a seat at the table, taking a sip of her forgotten tea.  Luckily, it was still fairly warm.  “I have class later, and I should really study some more.”

 

Justin sat down across from her.  “Then bring your books and leave at two.  You can study while I’m in the booth, and we can grab lunch together before you go.”  He argument made a lot of sense, but Shelby still hesitated.  She was worried of things going too quickly.  Then again, they did just have amazing sex in her shower.  That hadn’t been taking things slowly.

 

“You promise to let me study?”  She was still hesitant, but the look on his face was slowly breaking her down.  He was pretty hard to resist.

 

“Scouts honor.  You’ll be able to study, and then I’ll treat you to lunch.”  He gave her a puppy-dog look, pleading with those big blue eyes.

 

Shelby held up her hands in surrender.  “All right, all right.  Stop making me feel so guilty, I’ll come.”  She stood, grabbing her purse and notebooks off of the counter.  “But for the record, I highly doubt that you were ever a boy scout.”

 

 

Can you lie next to her

And give her your heart, your heart

As well as your body

And can you lie next to her

And confess your love, your love

As well as your folly

          "White Blank Page" - Mumford & Sons

 

The world seemed different to Shelby.  Stepping outside, into the sun, she felt lighter than she had in a very long time.  Justin's hand was gently placed on her lower back, his grin stretching across his stubble studded cheeks.  She took in a deep breath, inhaling the smells of the city before allowing Justin to help her into his car.  Today felt different.

 

She knew that having sex with Justin was loaded and put them in strange territory, but something about it felt familiar. She felt at ease in his presence, and for the first time since her mother's death, Shelby's head wasn't filled with the dark cloud that had been incessantly following her.  There was always the niggling fear that this was just temporary and she should be careful, but the laughter in his eyes and the heat of his touch drove that niggling fear far, far away.

 

"Are you sure it's okay that I'll be in the studio?  I mean...don't I distract the musical genius that happens?"  Shelby dug through her bag, looking for her notes.  She wanted to make sure she was completely prepared for this test today.

 

"If you were a distraction, I wouldn't invite you."  Justin placed a hand on her knee, squeezing gently.  "As long as you don't care that my focus is elsewhere, I like having you there."  A sly grin appeared on his face.

 

Shelby caught the grin.  "What's that look for?" 

 

Justin squeezed her knee again, sliding his hand to rest on her thigh.  "Nothing.  Just thinking about earlier..."

 

Her cheeks flamed hotly.  She stared out the window, not sure how she had been turned into this shy, blushing little girl.  Justin Timberlake had done a number on her already and he'd only been in New York for a little less than a week.  She was screwed.  And that thought made her blush even more.

 

"You've gone awfully quite on me, B."  Justin glanced over at his passenger, grinning. 
"Something on your mind?"

 

"You're such a perve."  It was a lame response, but it was all she could think of at the moment.

 

His response to that was a deep laugh that sent shivers down Shelby's spine.  "So, what's this big test on, anyway?"  The change in subject was welcome.

 

"All kinds of things, really.  We've been studying early childhood development for this last unit, so Maslow's Hierarchy of needs, Bloom's Taxonomy, and work from Piaget."  She glanced over at Justin who had a blank look on his face.  She giggled.  "Don't worry, I won't ask you to know what I'm talking about." 

 

"Good, because I'm pretty sure you just spoke gibberish." 

 

"Nope, just psychology."  Shelby relaxed slightly, her brain shifting focus to her test.  She found her note cards in her bag and flipped through them, trying to commit as much as she could to memory.  "It's pretty interesting, really," she glanced over at Justin again, "if you're into that sort of thing."

 

Justin pulled the car into the lot behind the studio, shifting into park and looking at Shelby.  He studied her face for a moment, smiling softly as he gently touched her cheek.  "You're pretty amazing, B."

 

Another blush stained her cheeks, and Shelby quickly moved from the car before he could see how much he got to her.  She didn't like that he had so much power of her, but she was helpless to stop it.  He was potent and intoxicating, and she knew he had gotten under her skin.

 

The studio was dimly lit and quiet.  The same producer that Justin had been working with the other day was already in the room, fiddling with the song they had been working on previously.  Shelby was surprised that Justin didn't have more people in the studio with him, but she was starting to learn that his brand of genius was all his own and he didn't need a posse to make magic happen.  Shelby felt at home here, and she gladly fell into the sofa so she could watch Justin work.

 

He was incredibly sexy when he was in that sound booth and behind that board.

 

~*~

 

It had only been an hour, but something seemed to have halted the production.  Justin sat at the board, fiddling with levels and listening to the same section over and over again.  Shelby had been engrossed in her studies, but the repetition of the track had disrupted her.  She looked up from her notes, watching Justin carefully.  The producer had left for a minute, and Shelby could sense the tension and it was obvious in Justin's posture. 

 

"Hey."  She carefully came up behind him, wrapping her arms around his shoulders and resting her cheek against his stubbly one.  "Trouble?"

 

 "Yeah, this track just sounds...off.  I can't figure out what it needs."  He sat back against the chair, throwing his hands up in exasperation.  Slowly, Shelby came around the chair and placed herself in Justin's lap.  She studied the board, running her fingers over the knobs and dials.  She pressed the play button, letting the track fill the room.  When it got to the spot he had been working on, she let it play through before backing it up and listening again.  She reached out and moved a few dials, lessening the bass levels and slightly adjusting the tempo. 

 

She played it again with her adjustments.  "Christ, girl, that took you two seconds."  Justin had wrapped his arms around her waist, peering over her shoulder as if he could find her secret posted on the sound board.  Shelby shrugged.

 

"I didn't do much."  She glanced back at him quickly, smirking.  "You forget that I spent my entire childhood sitting in chairs just like this.  My dad made sure I knew what I was doing."  She paused, smiling at the memories that chased through her mind.  "I may not be able to sing my way out of a paper bag, but I know music."

 

Quickly, Justin stood them up, turning Shelby around and lifting her hips onto the edge of the desk.  She lifted her legs and wrapped them around Justin's waist, resting her arms on his shoulders. 

 

This moment was different.  Sure, the sexual tension ran like a live current between the two of them, but there was something lying underneath that current that Shelby couldn't quite put her finger on.  There was a softness in his touch that had her melting.  There was a tenderness in his eyes that spoke volumes, and if she were honest with herself, it scared her.

 

Slowly, so slowly, he leaned in towards her, his mouth a hair's breadth away, his eyes closed gently.  Shelby let herself fall into him, but somewhere in the back of her mind she was overanalyzing the situation.  He was being so tender, and it was almost loving, this kiss.  His hands stayed on her neck, cradling her head.  Their bodies were flush, but it felt more of security and comfort than of sex.  This kiss was an entirely different species than the few they had shared in her apartment this morning.

 

Shelby pulled back, reeling from the emotions and thoughts swirling through her head.  Justin's lips brushed her forehead before he held her face so she was forced to look at him.

 

There was something happening behind those blue eyes.

 

"Hey, man, I'm sorry that took so long."  The producer, Chaz, stepped back into the room and broke the spell that had intertwined the two bodies.  Justin took a step back from Shelby, helping her into the chair he'd previously been occupying. 

 

"It's cool.  Listen to this."  He played back the track that Shelby had just fiddled with, watching Chaz's reaction.  When the got to the part he'd been stuck on, Justin smiled at the surprise on Chaz's face. 

 

"Shit, dude, that sounds a hundred times better than before.  What did you do?"

 

Justin leaned back against the sound board, grinning as he pointed to Shelby.  "It wasn't me.  She worked all of the magic on that one."

 

Shelby held up her hands, blocking their stares.  "I did not work any magic.  I slowed the tempo down by a fraction of a second, and I adjusted the bass levels.  I'm sure you two would have figured it out eventually, I just had the advantage of an outsider.  It was easier for me to hear."  She could still feel Justin's intense gaze and Chaz's unbelieving stare.  It was making her slightly uncomfortable.

 

"I think you're just being modest," was Justin's comment.  "Listen, Chaz, I promised this fine lady that I would get her some lunch and get her off to class.  Can we break for a while and I'll meet you back here at three?"

 

"Sure.  That works for me." 

 

Justin tugged on Shelby's sleeve, moving her hands away from her face.  She was still hiding behind them, lost in thought.  "Hey, let's go grab some food.  I'll drop you off on campus after."

 

Shelby moved, gathering her things in a daze.  Her thoughts were a million miles away from her exam, which was a terrible thing, but she couldn't help by examine what was happening between she and Justin.  A lot of feelings were flying around awfully fast, and she was having a difficult time keeping up.  The sex was amazing, sure, and she was oddly okay with the fact that they hadn't know each other that long before hopping into bed together.  But everything else...the look on his face when he watched her, the electricity in his touch that had nothing to do with lust, the way he spoke her name...those things were all loaded and on the verge of exploding.  Shelby wasn't sure she could survive that.

 

"You look completely lost in thought."  Justin's voice startled Shelby from her musings.  She turned, wide eyed, and looked over at him.  They were both in the car and he was merging into traffic.  She didn't even remember making it outside.

 

"Sorry," she said sheepishly.  "I have a lot on my mind, I suppose."

 

Justin didn't respond.  Instead he grabbed her hand with this free one, intertwining their fingers.  As he drove, he hummed softly, seemingly at ease with everything.

 

Shelby stared down at their hands, her mind drifting back to her previous musings.  She knew she was thinking too deeply into things, but it was part of her nature.  The unknown seemed to vast to focus on, so she made a mental list of the things she knew instead.  One: she liked being around Justin; Two: They had incredible sex and she was still feeling comfortable; Three: He made her laugh and he seemed to enjoy being around her, too.  Those were three positive things.

 

So why did her brain want to turn this into something huge and scary?

 

"Hey, we're here."  Justin's voice again broke through her thoughts and she pushed a smile onto her face. 

 

"Where is here?"  Shelby asked when Justin had helped her from the car.  She'd never been to this place before.

 

"It's just a small, family owned restaurant.  The guys and I found it when *NSYNC was still together, and the owners are great.  I figured no one would bother us here." 

 

Shelby was intrigued, so she followed him inside and let all other thoughts fall away.  Her stomach rumbled, reminding her that she was incredibly hungry.  "I'm starving."

 

Justin looked over at her and grinned.  "Well, most of our breakfast ended up in your hair and smeared across your kitchen."

 

Shelby tried to hide her blush.  "You're going to keep bringing this morning up, aren't you?"

 

His look turned to something slightly more predatory.  "Until you give me something else to make you blush with, yes, I am."  His eyes smoldered for a moment and he kissed Shelby hard on the mouth before opening the door and leading her into the restaurant.

 

Shelby couldn't only follow along, her head spinning.

 

~*~

 

The exam in front of her seemed to swim in and out of focus.  She could barely keep her eyes on the paper, and the clock was ticking down.  Honestly, she knew most of the answers and she felt really good about the content.  It was something else that was distracting her.

 

Or, to be more precise, someone else.

 

Lunch had been quiet and intimate.  Justin asked a lot of questions of Shelby, wanting to get inside of her head and know her on a different level.  He was a complete gentleman, and Shelby was feeling overwhelmed with everything that was happening.  She tried to turn the tables and ask him questions to get the focus off of her, but all that managed to do was intrigue her more.  He was open and honest, sharing funny anecdotes, family stories, memories...anything she asked of him he answered. 

 

It wasn't what she was expecting.

 

A person next to her stood and walked down to the front, passing in their test.  Shelby shook her head and put her eyes back on the paper.  She needed to get this done.

 

With all of the self control and focus she had in her, she pushed through the test and managed to finish with a half hour to spare.  She wasn't quite she why she couldn't get Justin Timberlake off of her brain, but now that her test was done she could ponder the man all she wanted.  Part of her wanted to run.  He seemed too intense at times, too willing to jump into something head first.  She was scared of things, and men, that could fall so easily.  On the other hand, he was charming and funny and he made her feel alive in ways she hadn't felt for such a long time.  There was a large part of her that wanted to stay and see where things went.

 

For a psychology major, she was pretty stumped by this whole situation.

 

Curiosity, though, was stronger than her resolve, and she pulled out her phone to text Justin as soon as she was out of the building.  She had a few more questions and now was the time to ask them.

 

Making plans to meet him for dinner, Shelby hailed a cab and made her way to his apartment.  She wanted to be some place where they could have privacy and not worry about being interrupted or overheard.  He suggested that he make dinner for the two of them, and she thought that sounded great.

 

Of course, nerves still fluttered throughout her stomach as she ascended the elevator to his apartment.

 

"Hey."  He greeted her at the door with a smile, amazing smells coming from the kitchen as he led her inside.  "I hope you're hungry, I think I have enough to feed an army."

 

Shelby seated herself at the counter, happily taking the glass of wine he offered.  "I'm famished."

 

"Good."  He stirred something that looked like a white sauce.  "I learned to cook from my Grams, and she was always feeding the entire neighborhood.  I can't seem to cook without making a ton of food."

 

"Then you have lots of leftovers."  Shelby answered.  Justin grinned over at her, draining some ravioli and then stirring them into the sauce of the stove. 

 

"Right."  After he'd pulled everything together and plated it up, he joined her at the counter, serving both of them before sitting down and sipping at his own glass of wine.  "I'm glad you're here, Shelby."  He had that look on his face again, the one that seemed to set Shelby's skin on fire.  Suddenly, she found herself feeling nervous.

 

"Hey, I'm not one to turn away food."  She joked, keeping her eyes on her plate to avoid looking at Justin. 

 

They ate in relative silence, a strange tension growing between them.  Shelby was wondering what he wanted from her, and Justin wanted to know what was going through her brain.  He knew that he was coming on pretty strong, but he couldn't help it.  She fascinated him.  He wanted to figure her out and know her, and he wasn't one to go about things half-heartedly. 

 

"Justin..."  Her voice was soft, and her eyes held a strange fear as she finally looked up at him.

 

"I've scared you," he stated.  He could see it on her face, and he silently cursed his inability to take anything slowly.  "I'm sorry."

 

"It's okay," she tried to assure him, but he was right.

 

"No, it's not."  He set his glass down and turned so he was facing her more fully.  "I like you, B.  A lot.  You have this...way about you, and I like it.  You're sexy as hell and you're smart and I can't stop thinking about you.  Hell, I came all the way to New York on a whim because I wanted to see you again."  He took a deep breath.  "But I know that I can be pretty persistent when I want to be, and I know that that can be overwhelming."

 

Shelby held up her fingers a centimeter apart.  "Just a bit." 

 

"I can't help it, B.  I can't stop and I can't back off now, so I understand if it's too much for you.  It's just...it's how I've always been."  He looked sheepish and nervous, something she hadn't seen from him before.  His honesty was impressive, and she couldn't fault him for that.

 

"You are a very intense man, Jus."  She smiled at him, reaching out to take his hand in hers.  "But...oddly enough...I like it."  When his eyes crashed into hers, she leaned forward to kiss him softly.  "And you're an amazing cook, so..."

 

He smirked at her, his eyebrow raised as he watched her.  "You're with me for my cooking now?"

 

A mischievous glint came into Shelby's eyes as she stood from her seat and pulled Justin out of the kitchen and down the hallway.  "Well...you're amazing at other things, too."  It was her turn to send smoldering looks his way, and he let out a growl low in his throat.

 

"Come here."

 

They barely made it to the bedroom.

Now I'll be bold

As well as strong

Use my head alongside my heart

So take my flesh

And fix my eyes

That tethered mind free from the lies

 

And I'll kneel down

Wait for now                

And I'll kneel down

Know my ground

And I'll kneel down

Wait for now

          Mumford & Sons – “Nothing is Written”

 

 

Slowly light slipped in through the blinds, caressing the intertwined sleepers with gentle fingers of gold.  The tender touch was warm, inviting the dreamers into the realm of waking.

 

Shelby rolled away from the light, hoping to catch a hold of her dream and make it stay longer, but conscious thought was winning the battle.  Carefully, she cracked open her eyes.  Justin was still asleep on his back, his chiseled chest freckled with swaths of golden light.  His hand rested on his stomach, and Shelby watched his chest rise and fall with each breath he took.  Not one to like being alone for long, Shelby reached out a hand and traced a line from his collar bone, down his sternum, and toward his stomach, stopping to dip into his belly button.  He stirred, swatting at her ticklish fingers with his hand.  She grinned and did it again, this time creeping lower, slightly moving the sheet that covered his lower half.

 

His eyes opened, barely slits but enough for him to catch her impish smile.

 

“What are you doing?”  His voice was gravel, laced still with the sleep he’d so recently left behind.

 

“Waking you up, of course.”  Again, Shelby’s finger traced its way over his abdomen, around his belly button, and down the trail of fine hairs that signaled the end of his torso.  His eyes opened slightly larger when her wandering hands plunged beneath the sheets and caught him off guard.

 

“Shit, girl…”  the growl that came from him was playful but warning.  “What are you trying to do to me?”  With a gentle force, Justin removed Shelby’s hands from his nether regions, pulling her up to rest against his chest.  “I’m not awake for that yet, B.  And like you once told me, I will be completely alert and coherent when we have sex.”  Now his grin matched that of the girl next to him.

 

“You’re no fun.”  Her pout was short lived when Justin rolled them over, landing on top of the brunette and trapping her body beneath his own.

 

Justin peppered chaste kisses over her shoulders and collar bone, mumbling “I’m lots of fun” as he moved along.  When he was done, he propped himself over her on his elbows, his blue eyes sparkling in the early morning light.  “What are we doing today?”

 

Shelby ran her hands over his back and up his neck, running his stubbly hair through her fingers as she thought.  “I want pancakes.”  She announced, looking back up into his amused face.

 

“Pancakes?”

 

“Yes, and not just any pancakes, either.”  She wiggled beneath him, causing him to let out a stifled moan.

 

“You’re going to start something here, B.”

 

“Well then, get up if you don’t want me to start something.”  He rolled off of her, landing on the bed beside her with a soft thud.  She got up from the bed, her naked skin striped with the light that filtered the blinds.  “Come on, we’ve got to get going if we want to get there on time.”

 

“Get where?”  Blearily, Justin stood from the bed, quickly following Shelby into the bathroom where she started the shower.

 

“Pancakes!”  She said, jumping under the warm spray and pulling Justin along in with her.  “I’m taking you on an adventure today, Jus.”

 

He watched as she lathered her hair with shampoo.  “Adventure?”

 

She stopped to rinse, glancing over at her shower partner.  “Right.  You don’t have to be in the studio today, do you?”

 

He shrugged, joining her in washing.  He might as well go along with this.  “Not if I don’t want to.  Why, where are these pancakes?”

 

The grin on her face was her only answer.  She grabbed the conditioner and massaged some into her hair.  Then she took the wash cloth and filled it with soap, lathering both her’s and Justin’s bodies with the fragrant suds.

 

When done showering, Shelby sent Justin in to get dressed while she ran into his den and printed off the directions she needed.  She then threw on some clothes she’d brought with her—just in case, you know—and met Justin in his bedroom.  He was dressed down, jeans and a hoodie, and Shelby thought that she liked this look the best.  A hat adorned his head, and she tapped the brim, grinning.

 

“Are you ready?”

 

Justin gave her a long, skeptical look.  “Should I be scared?”

 

Shelby shrugged, grabbing his hand and pulling him from the room.  “Nah, I’m just going to kidnap you and make you my sex slave, that’s all.”

 

“Oh, well in that case…”  the sarcasm in his voice was thick and Shelby swatted his arm.

 

“I am going to need your car keys, though.  I don’t want to ruin the surprise.”

 

There was hesitation as he handed her the car keys, but eventually he slipped them into her hands and let her drag him down to the parking garage where he kept his car.  There was a skip in her step, a lightness that had Justin grinning despite the fact that he was slightly worried about this ‘adventure’ she was bringing him on.  Spontaneity and Justin Timberlake didn’t always mesh well.  He had to plan things and prepare for everything, which meant random trips to get pancakes weren’t often.

 

Not much was said as Shelby started to drive them out of the city.  Justin was still bleary eyed, and Shelby was intent on the directions she’d printed.  He’d tried to peek once, but a swat to the back of his head thwarted his attempt. 

 

“I’m going to stop for some gas and to grab a coffee, can I get you one?”

 

Justin gave her a look.  “I thought we were going for pancakes?”

 

“We are, but it’s going to take a bit to get there and I don’t want you grumping at me the entire way.  So, coffee?”

 

Justin’s reply was a grunt.  Where was she taking him?  She stopped the car, leaving him behind as she made her way inside to grab coffees, pay for gas, and pick up a few other things they might need along the way.  When she returned to the car, she set the paper bag in Justin’s lap, earning her another questioning look.

 

“Why are there donuts and Danish in here if we’re getting pancakes?”  His question went unanswered because Shelby had shut the door to pump gas, so he asked again when she settled back into the driver’s seat.

 

She grinned.  “Well, it’s going to be a little while before we get to the pancakes, so…I didn’t want you to be too hungry.”

 

“How long is a little while, Shelby?”

 

She didn’t look at him when she answered.  “Three hours.”

 

“Where the hell are you taking me?  Three hours?”  His voice was amused, but he was a little worried. 

 

“We’re taking our adventure to Vermont.”  Of all the places he was expecting, Vermont was not one of them.  “I know a farm out there that makes maple syrup and the also have a restaurant that serves breakfast.  I want their pancakes.”

 

At this, Justin laughed.  Shelby Edge was entirely unpredictable. 

 

~*~

 

The three hour car ride had passed surprisingly quickly.  Justin was glad Shelby had grabbed some snacks because he needed them, but he enjoyed riding along with her, singing to music and talking about the most random topics.  At one point they even debated the best smelling laundry detergent.  He was complete amused by her.  He was also a little smitten with her.  No one had taken him on random trips like this before.  No one had looked past his celebrity so completely, and with her he felt human.  It was strange, but he wasn’t going to over-think it.

 

“We’re almost there.”  Her soft voice broke through his thoughts and he turned to see her grinning at him.  He smiled back.  They were surrounded by verdant fields, rolling hills, and cattle farms the stretched to the horizon.  It was beautiful contry.  Surprisingly enough, he’d never really been to Vermont before.  Sure, he’d driven through it on tours with the guys and solo, but he didn’t think he’d actually stopped to check anything out.  This was a first.

 

“So, B, how the hell did you find a farm in Vermont that serves pancakes?” 

 

She turned to give him a small smile.  “When I was a kid, my grandparents owned a farm out here.  During vacations and the summers, my parents would ship me off out here and I would stay with my grandparents.  When they passed away, a younger couple bought the farm from them and that’s where we’re going.”

 

“Oh.”  Justin was surprised, to say the least.  The more he learned about Shelby Edge, the more curious he became.

 

“We’re here!”  She parked the car in front of a small building with a sign advertising pancakes.  Before he could take much else in, Shelby had him by the hand and started dragging him in through the door.

 

“We’ll eat first, and then I’ll take you on a tour.”  The inside of the building was cozy, fitted with small tables that were still rather empty.  There was a counter with a couple older men drinking coffee, and a waitress.  She waved them in, motioning that she’d be just a second.

 

“We’ll if it isn’t Miss Shelby.  What the hell are you doing here?”  The waitress greeted them as they sat down, grinning at Shelby.  “I haven’t seen you in years.”

 

Shelby shrugged, blush creeping up her cheeks.  “I know, it’s been a while.  Nancy, this is my friend Justin.  Justin, this is Nancy.  She’s one of the owners.”

 

Justin smiled up at the waitress, offering a hello before scanning the menu while the girls talked.  Nancy didn’t stay much longer, taking their order and leaving to attend to some new customers.  While they waited, Justin took a minute to look around.  It was rustic, to say the least, but there was something welcoming about the small restaurant.  He liked that it was off the beaten path, and he liked even better than everyone around seemed to be of an older generation.  Even though he hadn’t noticed, he’d been tense most of the ride here.  Force of habit.

 

“The pancakes here are amazing, but mostly, I think, because of the syrup.”

 

“They make it here?”

 

“Yeah, I can show you the evaporator and everything.  It’s too late in the season now, so they won’t be boiling, but it’s still pretty cool to see.”

 

Justin watched her across the table for a bit, evermore intrigued by what he was discovering.

 

The food was out quickly, and just like Shelby had promised, it was delicious.  The pancakes were some of the best he’d ever eaten, and the syrup was rich and sweet.   There was bacon, sausage, home fries, and toast, too.  It didn’t take long for the two of them to become completely stuffed.

 

“I haven’t eaten like that since I was last in Tennessee.”  He leaned back in his chair, patting his full stomach.  “Thanks, B.”

 

Shelby grinned at him across the table.  “My pleasure, Jay.”  She nodded with her head toward the door.  “Let’s go for a walk.  We can burn off some of those calories.”

 

She left some bills on the table to pay for the meal and grabbed Justin by the hand, leading him out into the heart of the farm.  The weather had just started to warm up, Summer peaking its way through the land.  The fields were newly planted and the air smelled of rich, overturned soil. 

 

“It’s so peaceful out here.”  Justin whispered, almost afraid to ruin the moment.

 

“I love it here.”  Shelby tugged his hand, leading him into a barn where some horses were stalled.  “This was Gram’s horse.  She bought it when I was a kid, hoping I would take up riding like my mother.”  She went up to the stall, running her hands down the nose of a chestnut mare.  “Unfortunately, I take after my father and I never did get the hang of it.”  She let the horse nip at her hands, its breath hot on her skin.  “This is Beauty.”

 

“Like Black Beauty?”

 

Shelby shrugged.  “I told you I was a kid.”  His response was a chuckle.

 

They moved farther into the barn, stopping to pet a few more horses before exiting out the other end and into a different part of the farm.  Shelby led him past a couple other buildings until she reached one that was set toward the back, settled into a copse of trees.  “This is the sugar shed.”

 

Justin followed, stepping inside the small barn.  There was a massive stove in the center, and piles of wood stacked around the edges.  “What is that?”

 

“That’s the evaporator.”  She moved closed, pointing as she spoke.  “Syrup is made from the sap of maple trees.  It has to be boiled down slowly, so the sap starts here, warming up over the main part of the stove, and it drips into the pan below.  In that big pan is where it boils and boils.  When it gets to a certain depth in the pan, it’s taken off and put into a large pot to be finished off.”  She moved around the room and showed him a few more things.

 

“How long does that take?”

 

“It usually takes most of the day, maybe ten to twelve hours, depending on how much you’re boiling.  The rule is eighty-six to two.  Or really, forty gallons of sap will make one gallon of syrup.  You can imagine how long that would take to boil down.”

 

“Shit.  That’s incredible.”  He glanced over at Shelby and grabbed her hand.  “It’s even more incredible that you know all this crap.”  Bumping his shoulder into hers, he managed to get her to smile.

 

“I loved coming here as a kid, especially during sapping season.  My grandparents taught me everything I know.”  Her eyes moved farther away in time, leaving Justin alone in the present moment.  He let ger drift off, looking around the small room some more.  He was intrigued.  This wasn’t a side that he expected to see of Shelby.  She didn’t strike him as the muck-boots wearing, country type.  He liked it.

 

“Thanks for bringing me here, B.”  He gently took her hand in his, brining her into him so he could kiss her forehead.  “This is really cool.”

 

Her cheeks flushed again and she looked down at the floor.  “You’re the first person I’ve taken here, actually.  But…” she looked up at him with a soft smile, “I’m really glad you came, too.”

 

Slowly they walked back the way they came, taking their time in getting back to the car. 

 

“It was the perfect adventure, tour guide.”  Justin bumped shoulders with Shelby, kissing her on the cheek.

 

“Well, don’t expect me to top it anytime soon.  I’m not sure I’ve got anything better than a farm and some kick ass pancakes.”  She handed him the keys, happy to let him drive them home.

 

She was feeling contented, which she hadn’t expected from someone like Justin.  When they’d bumped into each other at the party in L.A., she figured him for another musician that was nice enough but too busy for anything other than being a celebrity.  She had been happily proved wrong, and the more time she spent around this man, the more she realized she didn’t want to be away from him.  That could get dangerous, but then again, she was always up for a little excitement in her life.  There was nothing wrong with seeing where this went, and she was pretty certain the feeling was mutual. 

 

 

But love the one you hold

And I'll be your goal

To have and to hold

A lover of the light

 

Skin too tight

and eyes like marbles

You spin me high

so watch me as I glide

Before I tumble homeward, homeward

 

 

The stare that was burning into Justin’s back was making him very uncomfortable, and he wasn’t sure what was going on.

 

“Can you stop?”  Justin spun in his chair, eyeing his cousin with the same caution that someone would eye a rabid animal.

 

“Stop what?”  The sound was innocent, but the look on Rachel’s face was anything but.  “I’m just watching you work.”  She motioned to the studio around them, giving Justin a grin.

 

“Yeah, and you’re shooting daggers into my back.  I can feel them.”  He rubbed a hand over his head, trying to release the tension.  “I’m not sure what you’re so upset about, Rach, but I can’t concentrate with you acting like this.”

 

The brunette shrugged.  “I think you’re guilty conscience is making you believe things that aren’t really there.  I’m just here to support your music, but if it’ll help, I’ll head back to the hotel.”

 

A sigh of relief slumped Justin’s shoulders.  “Actually, that would be great.  When I get done here, we can grab some dinner, okay?”

 

“Whatever, Justin.  See you later.”  Rachel left the studio, slightly perturbed but trying to hide it.  New York wasn’t a bad place to be, really, but she knew that this trip was unnecessary.  Justin could’ve recorded in Los Angeles just fine;  he just wanted to spend time with Shelby.  Shelby, who was the daughter of Peter Edge, Justin’s boss.  Shelby, who was a wreck, and her cousin was oblivious.  Sure, the girl was very down-to-earth, and she was focused on school and seemed to be handling things pretty well.  But really, it only took one look at the poor thing to see that she was falling apart at the seams.  Between the death of her mother and the tension with her father, Shelby was just looking for an escape and Justin was the perfect distraction.

 

Rachel could only see disaster in all of this.

 

That, and she really wanted to be back in L.A. with all of her friends and the warmer, less muggy weather.  She had followed Justin across the globe, and she would gladly do it until he decided enough was enough, but really, New York in the summer time?  What was he thinking?

 

~*~

 

It had been three days, seven hours, and forty-three minutes since Justin had dropped Shelby off at her apartment after their adventure to Vermont.  She had texted him a few times, chatted on the phone with him, but she had not seen him since that moment.

 

She had suddenly turned into a teenager, and it was disgusting. 

 

Shelby sighed and peeked at the clock, her classes almost over for the day.  Instead of taking notes studiously and paying attention to the lecture, she’d been doodling hearts across her notebook and dreaming about Justin Timberlake.  Luckily, she’d stopped herself before she started to practice writing her name with his.  But still, this was extreme.  She was acting like a love-struck fool. 

 

“All right, guys, read up on Chapter seventeen and let me know what you think on our discussion board.  I’ll have some questions posted for you by tomorrow night.”  The professor waved off the students and Shelby let out a sigh of relief.  She needed to clear her head and shake off this strange, non-Shelby-like fixation.  She couldn’t lose focus on things right now, even though the thought was tempting.  Justin was great, and she really liked him, but…this was getting ridiculous.

 

“What’s on the agenda for tonight, Shelb?  Another outing with this mystery man?”  Delia bumped shoulders with Shelby as they exited the classroom, grinning over at her friend.  “What has he been doing with you, anyway?  You’re never around anymore.”

 

Shelby smiled back.  “A lady never tells, D.”  The eye-roll from Delia had Shelby laughing.  “I’ll tell you what, I’m in the mood for a girls night.  Dancing, drinks?  I swear, no men.”

 

Delia’s eyebrows raised in shock.  “You mean, not until your late night booty call, right?”  Laughter spilled blond’s mouth and she watched the blush creep up Shelby’s neck and cheeks.  “Yeah, I get it.  But dancing sounds good.”  They exited the classroom together, making plans as they went.  Shelby left Delia with a wave, heading back to her apartment to get changed and ready for the night.

 

Her pocket buzzed, and she grinned to find a text from Justin on her phone.  She was happy she had plans, because she knew if he’d invited her over for any reason, she would want to go, but she was trying to pace herself.  He was intoxicating and she didn’t want to become addicted too fast.  Plus, she did miss hanging out with her girl friends.

 

The sad face Justin sent back made Shelby smile.  Maybe he was as hooked as she was.

 

An hour later found Shelby, Delia and a few other girls entering one of the city’s many night clubs, the bass interrupting the rhythm of their hearts as it thumped through their systems.  A table was snagged quickly and drinks were ordered as the girls scoped out the place.

 

“So, Shelby, Delia tells us you’ve hooked up with some mystery man.  Details.”  Ally, a fiery red head grinned over her drink, wiggling her eyebrows at Shelby.  “How hot is he?  And is he good in the sack?”

 

A blush crept up the brunette’s cheeks, but she blamed it on the shot she’d just downed.  “He’s tall, has incredible abs, and eyes that will turn you to putty.”  She paused for effect, her own grin sliding onto her face, “and he’s a-maz-ing in bed.”

 

All of the girls giggled, oohing and ahhing at Shelby’s confession.  It was rare for any of them to snag anyone decent, it seemed, so they drooled over the chance to live vicariously through each other. 

 

“Name, please…and tell me he has lots of hot friends.”  Ally handed Shelby another shot, staring at her friend in anticipation of getting juicy details.  Shelby’s face was flaming red, and she hesitated, not sure if she should spill everything or keep Justin’s identity to herself.

 

Her choice was made for her when a commotion at the door stole the table’s attention.  The girls all turned, trying to catch a glimpse of whoever was causing such a ruckus.  Shelby’s face stretched into a grin as she caught sight of the buzzed head.  Justin and some friends made their way inside, flanked by a couple security members, and he scanned the room until he spotted who he was looking for.

 

“Holy Fuck, that’s Justin Timberlake.”  Ally was the one to finally speak, “and I think he’s heading in our direction.”  The table sat, speechless and completely still as they watched the singer make is way over.

 

“Right,” Shelby spoke up, “well, the mystery man I’ve been seeing…his name is Justin.”  She didn’t notice the rest of the girls dropped jaws and wide stares.  She was too busy grinning at Justin.  “Hey you.”

 

Without hesitation, Justin grabbed Shelby by the waist and pulled her in for a searing kiss.  “I’ve been waiting to do that for three days.”  His eyes searched her face, uncaring of the crowd that was watching.  He’d missed her, and when she’d told him she was going out he couldn’t resist the temptation to see her again.  Girls’ night be damned. 

 

“You’re crashing.”  She tried to give him a stern look, but the smile on her face took away the severity of it.  Her insides were melting.

 

Justin took a step back from Shelby, turning to smile at the rest of the table and introduce himself.  “Hey all.  Sorry to crash the night.”  His grin stretched when all of the girls waved off his apology, eager to shake his hand and welcome him and his friends.  He’d brought a couple of the producers he’d been working with, but mostly because he didn’t want Shelby’s friends to be mad when she ditched them to dance with him.  “This is Chaz, Danny, and Mark.  I hope you don’t mind, but I’m going to steal Shelby for a little while.”

 

With a grin, Delia called out to their retreating backs.  “Traitor!” But she happily invited Chaz to sit with her and order her a drink.

 

~*~

 

“Justin Randall, if you don’t get your ass out of bed right now and answer this damn phone call, I’m going to call your mother.”  Rachel’s voice filtered into Justin’s consciousness, pulling him from dreams that he didn’t want to leave.

 

“What the fuck.”  He pulled a pillow over his head, only to have it snatched off by his irate cousin.  “Jesus, Rachel.  Where’s the fire?”

 

She glared down at him, holding out her BlackBerry.  “Peter Edge is on the phone, Justin, and I think you need to sober up this second.”  Her eyes were black and she was pissed.  Justin obeyed.

 

“Good Morning, Mr. Edge.”  He tried to sound awake and coherent instead of the hung over he felt.  “What can I do for you?”

 

It took a while for the man to answer, but Justin knew that this call wasn’t to chat about golf scores or last night’s baseball game.  “I have a few papers here, Mr. Timberlake, and all of them have pictures of you and my daughter…dancing…”  the last word was filled with a disgust that had Justin cringing.

 

“Mr. Edge…you know how the tabloids love to spin things.  We went dancing last night, that’s all.”

 

“And the pictures of the two of you with your tongues down the other’s throat?  That a new dance move I don’t know about.”

 

“Shit.”  It slipped from Justin’s mouth as he ran a hand over his face.  He was too tired for this.

 

“You’re supposed to be recording an album, Justin, not cavorting with my daughter.  I can’t dictate who you sleep with, and I won’t try to tell you what to do, but know this,”  he paused for effect, “Shelby is only going to cause you problems if you keep up with…this.  You have a job to do, and I don’t want to see any more pictures like this until your finished working.  Do you understand me?”

 

Speechless was an understatement.  Justin cleared his throat, unsure of exactly what to say. 

 

“She’s trouble, Justin.  She’s irresponsible, selfish, and she’s going to make a mess of things for you if you’re not careful.”

 

Justin could feel the anger rising, but he swallowed it down.  He couldn’t quite believe that Peter was talking about his daughter like this, but he also knew that he was on thin ice at the moment.  “Yes sir, I understand.”  He took a deep breath.  “I won’t stop seeing her, though, no matter what you say.”

 

“I expect to have you in my office in two weeks with the songs you’ve completed so far.  Good day, Mr. Timberlake.”  The line went dead.

 

“Fuck.”  Justin threw the BlackBerry onto the bed, his head pounding and his pulse racing in his ears.  What was going on?  All he could remember was having an incredible time with Shelby last night, dancing and drinking.  He knew that pictures were being taken, but nothing inappropriate had gone on.  There wasn’t any groping or unnecessary PDA, unless you count the dancing.  Apparently, though, he’d pissed his CEO off enough to get a personal call. 

 

Just great.

 

“You have studio time in an hour.  I’ve ordered breakfast, so I suggest you shower and eat.”  Rachel came back in the room, grabbing her phone and eyeing her cousin warily.  “Are you okay?”

 

Justin shook his head.  “I think I just got threatened by Peter Edge.”

 

Rachel made a non-descript noise, sending Justin an “I told you so” look before leaving him alone.

 

Justin stretched slowly, moving from the bed at a snail’s pace so he didn’t aggravate his raging headache.  Be wanted to showed, but before he did he wanted to make sure Shelby was okay.  If Peter was calling here, Justin was certain that he’d called his daughter, too.

 

“Go away.”  Her voice was groggy, but there was something in her tone.  “I’ll just get you into trouble.”

 

So, Peter had called.

 

“B, are you okay?” 

 

She scoffed into the phone.  “No.  I just got woken up by my father screaming into my ears about how horrible of a person I am and that I need to stay away from you.  I think he’s worried that I’m going to ruin your career.”

 

Justin sighed.  “I told him that I wouldn’t stop seeing you.  I mean it, B.  He’s…I can understand why he’s upset, but he has no right to dictate what we do.” 

 

She sighed into his ear and he imagined her flopping back into her pillows.  “I think we should lay low for a while.  I don’t want him deciding that you can’t record anywhere but L.A.”

 

“He can’t do that, B.  But we can lay low if you want.  No more clubs.”  He chuckled when she grunted.  “No more booze, either.  Are you hung over, too?”

 

“I’m pretty sure I was hit by a truck last night.  And my mouth tastes like ass.”  There was a short pause.  “But I had a lot of fun, and I’m not sorry about it.  I am a little curious to see those pictures, though.”

 

Justin moved into the bathroom, peering at the bags under his eyes and grimacing at his reflection.  A shower might not be enough.  Good thing he’d be holed up in the studio all day.  “I’ve got to get some recording done, B.  Maybe you can come over for dinner tonight?”

 

“Just give me a call.  I’m going back to sleep.”  Justin barely had time to get in a goodbye before she had hung up.  He chuckled, wincing at the pain that shot through his head.

 

That was one wake-up call he didn’t care to repeat, ever.

 

 

I, I can't promise you

that I won't let you down

And I, I can't promise you

that I will be the only one around

when your hope falls down

                  “Hold On to What You Believe” – Mumford & Sons

 

Shelby was distracted, that much was obvious.  Justin would bet that her distraction came from her father’s earlier phone call, but no matter the cause, her attention was elsewhere.  It was only a little frustrating.

 

“You all right?”  He asked, perhaps for the hundredth time that evening, causing Shelby to jump a little, grinning at him sheepishly.

 

“I’m so sorry.  I’m horrible company tonight.”  She gently laid her napkin down on the table, her food hardly touched.  Justin had ordered take-out, and they were seated on the floor in the living room, enjoying the crackle of the fireplace.  Physically, she was right there with him…mentally, she couldn’t help but wonder if her father were right.  “I can’t turn off his voice,” she admitted quietly.

 

Justin settled back against the edge of the couch, motioning for Shelby to join him.  When she’d moved herself into the circle of his arms, he relaxed and held her closely.  “He’s not right, Shelby.”  His voice was low, serious, and the tone held an authority that left no room for Shelby to argue.  “I don’t quite know where he’s coming from, but he’s wrong.  You’re incredibly smart, you’re focused on your goals, and you’re almost done getting a degree that can take you wherever you want it to.  You causing me trouble is the least of my worries.  In fact, getting caught making out with you is a step up for me.”  This earned a small grin from the girl in his arms.

 

Shelby shrugged a little, staring into the flames as they danced, her thoughts far away.  “I think he means my depression, Justin.”  She took a deep breath, preparing to share things he should know.  “Before my mom died, I’d been having a really tough time with things.  Even before I left L.A., I knew I was fighting depression.  I was just…never happy, ever.  It was like I constantly had this dark cloud over my life, and I couldn’t find a way out.  I started acting really irresponsibly.  I drank heavily, partied all the time…it was bad.” 

 

Justin just listened, pulling her tighter against his chest.

 

“My parents were lost about what to do with me.  My dad thought I just needed focus and work, so he pushed the music thing…constantly.  My mom knew that that wasn’t it, but we still couldn’t really figure out what was going on in my head.  I saw a lot of counselors, and I spent years searching for the parts of me that needed healing.”  She licked her lips, taking a breath before continuing with her story.  “It was during that process that I discovered a love for psychology.  If I could figure out how other people worked, maybe I could figure out me.  I enrolled in classes and left for New York, against my father’s wishes.”

 

She gave him a sad look, twisting her fingers together.  “Dad didn’t understand what was going on.  He really didn’t believe that depression was a problem, and he thought I just needed to snap out of it.  It was something he and my Mom fought about all the time.  I think he blames me for that.” 

 

Clearing his throat, Justin shifted a little.  “When the guys and I first started touring over in Europe, before anyone even knew who we were, I went through something similar.  The schedule was so exhausting and I was so scared about the future of things…I often had panic attacks.  It was one of the scariest things I’ve faced in my life.”  Shelby turned her head so she could look at him.  “It got better for a while, but after Britney…”

 

“You don’t have to do this, Jus.”  She placed a warm hand on his cheek, smiling at him.

 

He shrugged, attempting a smile back.  “I just want you to know that you’re not alone, B.  This isn’t some demon that you have to face by yourself.  I get it.  And I think that you’ve come a lot farther than you realize.”

 

“I know.”  She let out a breath she didn’t know she’d been holding.  “I just think my Dad only sees the broken pieces of me.  Of course, it doesn’t help that I seem to constantly be drunk in his presence.”  Her laugh was harsh.  “I don’t want to be a problem for you, Justin.  I won’t do that to you.”

 

He shook his head, adamant.  “You’re not a problem.  I swear.” 

 

“What did he say to you?”

 

“It doesn’t really matter, B.  He can’t tell me who to be with, and you’re not going to interfere with my career, so I’m not worried.”  His blue eyes met her browns.  “I like being with you.  You…you have this way of making me feel alive.  I feel lighter, happier, and all of the shit that stresses me out doesn’t seem to matter quite as much when you’re around.” 

 

She grinned.

 

“You seem to understand me, and I like that.  I don’t have to pretend or explain myself with you.  I can just be.”

 

Gently, Shelby placed a kiss on Justin’s cheek.  “I feel the same way with you, Jus.”

 

This time, when their eyes met, it was filled with something neither could quite explain.  Carefully, with a tender caress, Justin brought Shelby’s face to his own, melting into the kiss slowly.  He could lose himself in this girl, and he liked who he was when he was found again.  She reminded him of home.

 

“Thank you.”  Her breath was warm against his lips, her words pinned between kisses.

 

Instead of answering, Justin stood from his spot, helping Shelby to her feet and leading her down the hall to his bedroom.  He led her over to the bed, taking a seat and pulling her down into his lap.  His caresses were slow, gentle, and his lips were soft against her skin.  Shelby could feel herself melting into his touch and getting lost in his embrace.  This was a healing moment for the both of them, and it felt so good to be taken care of.

 

With no apparent rush, they laid down next to each other, letting their fingers and hands do the communicating.  Justin’s fingers brushed over Shelby’s shoulder, pulling the tank top strap down her arm.  With the other hand, he reached for the hem, his knuckles brushing against the warm skin of her stomach which quivered at his touch.  His own shirt came off soon after, and he pulled her in close.  There was something completely erotic about skin touching skin, but it somehow felt safe, too.  His hands spanned her back, dipping into her curves and holding her tightly against him.

 

Shelby could hardly catch her breath.

 

She wasn’t sure when the rest of their clothing had been removed, but she soon found that she could feel all of him pressed against her.  With applied patience, she let her hands explore his skin, stopping to savor ever part of him that she could.  This moment wasn’t about the sex, at least, not yet.  It was entirely more intimate.  Of course, desire and need won out over patience, and Justin settled himself over Shelby.

 

He wasn’t sure he wanted this moment to end.  Right now the world felt different.  He couldn’t remember things that had been worrying him earlier.  He wasn’t sure why he’d been stressed or feeling pressure.  He knew, though, that as soon as this spell was broken, the rest of the world would come crashing back onto their shoulders with a heavy weight.

 

Right now…though…she was his.

 

~*~

 

The next two weeks fell into a routine of sorts.  Shelby continued to go to classes and focus on school, while Justin holed up in the studio during the day and sometimes into the night.  Most evenings they spent together, just enjoying the comfort of each other’s company.  It was easy and it was just what they needed.  There wasn’t much talk of Shelby’s father, and that was just fine by them. 

 

“I can’t believe you don’t love this movie.”  Shelby stole a handful of popcorn from the bowl, giving Justin a wide-eyed look.  “It’s…it’s like the best romance ever!”

 

Justin shrugged.  “I just don’t think it’s as epic as everyone else does.  I have other movies I like better.”  Shelby scoffed, still not believing he was being serious.  “Ryan is one of my good friends, I can’t see past that.  It’s a good movie, I just don’t love it.”

 

The movie in question was The Notebook, which had Shelby’s rapt attention.  The story was incredible, and it never failed to make her cry and long for something as passionate and lasting as what Noah and Ally had.  She should’ve know that Justin wouldn’t be as excited about the movie as she was, simply because he’s a man, but still. 

 

“Can I meet Ryan sometime?”  There was a glint in her eyes as she asked.

 

Justin seemed to ponder for a minute before shaking his head.  “Nope, not a chance.”

 

“Why not?!” 

 

Carefully setting the bowl of popcorn on the coffee table, Justin moved over on the couch and pulled Shelby into his arms.  “Because you’re mine, B, that’s why.”  She giggled as his hands tickled her sides.  She managed to grab the pillow behind her, smacking Justin in the face.  “This means war!”  He cried, grabbing the pillow from her hands and attacking relentlessly, laughter spilling from both of them.

 

“Stop!” Shelby panted, holding up her hands to cover her face.  “Justin, stop!”  Her laughter made her words nearly inaudible.

 

“Not until you say I’m sexier than Ryan Gosling.”  Another blow landed across Shelby’s cheek.  “Say it!”

 

She struggled to get the pillow out of his hands, reaching over his head to grab at it.  This earned another hit to the head.  “Okay!  Okay!  You’re sexier than Ryan Gosling.”  Just like that, the pillow fell from Justin’s hands and Shelby snatched it quickly.  With a grin, she tucked it behind her back and well out of Justin’s reach.  “He does have really nice abs, though.” 

 

In response, he stuck his tongue out.

 

Deciding it was time to broach a more serious subject, Shelby turned her body toward Justin.  “When are you heading back to L.A.?”

 

“I’m leaving Thursday.” 

 

That was three days away, and Shelby could feel her joy deflate a little. “Do you know when you’re coming back?”

 

Justin had been worrying over that fact for a while now, and after wearing a path into his floor pondering what to do, he decided it was best to leave it open ended.  For now.  “I’m not sure yet.  I have to meet with the record executives on Friday.  I’m not sure what else I have to do, so it all depends on my schedule.”

 

Shelby gave him a small smile.  “You better come back to me, Timberlake.”  She was joking, but there was worry and fear behind her light words. 

 

“Of course I will.”  He promised. 

 

But even that felt strained.

 

~*~

 

Justin slipped his sun glasses down over his face as he stepped out of the building into the bright L.A. sunlight.  He rolled his shoulders, trying to rid himself of the tension in his neck.  The meeting with Peter had been strained, to say the least, but it had stayed professional.  There was no mention of Shelby, but the looks that Peter had sent Justin’s way were less than friendly.  It was also obvious that the executives were concerned with Justin’s focus and drive for this album, and they had set a timeframe.  He now had one more month to get his project finished, and they made it clear that an extension would not be granted. 

 

He felt as if he were being scolded like a little boy.

 

Not wanting to linger on the sidewalk long, Justin slid into the seat of his car, cursing at the hot leather that seared his skin through his shorts.  He needed perspective, and he needed someone to listen and offer unbiased advice.

 

It was time he paid a visit to Johnny. 

 

Despite the direction his career had taken, Johnny had stayed on with Justin through everything.  He was a mentor, a father figure, and a great friend.  He was also extremely smart with situations like this and he would always offer Justin thoughtful and practical advice.  Just what he needed.

 

The drive to Johnny’s house was quiet.  Justin was lost in his thoughts, not sure how he felt about everything.  The album felt forced to begin with.  He was happy dabbling in the movie world, and he felt that most of his movies were successful.  There was definitely resentment towards the label for pushing him into another album when he didn’t feel ready yet.  And then there was Shelby.  He’d found her, and she gave him inspiration he hadn’t know was hiding inside of him.  Now, though, he was being told that he needed to distance himself because she was bad for him.

 

It was like being sixteen all over again.

 

Justin rolled his car to a stop, stepping out to grin up at Johnny’s house.  He loved this place, and he loved this man.  The door opened a moment later, and Johnny was standing there, hands on his hips and a grin on his face.

 

“Justin, man, how the hell are you?”  He met Justin halfway down the steps, embracing the younger man in a hug. 

 

Justin shrugged in response.  “Just got a lot on my mind, J.  I was hoping we could catch up some.”

 

“Yeah, and I could tell you what to do to get your ass out of whatever jam you’re in.”  Johnny laughed, ushering Justin inside.

 

“Well…you know me.”  His grin was sheepish.  Justin followed Johnny inside, through the living room and kitchen and out back towards the office.  It was a quite place, peaceful, and Justin had spent quite a few hours in this space, figuring out life.

 

Once they were seated in the plush leather chairs, Johnny got right to business.  “So the grapevine tells me you’ve pissed off Peter Edge.”

 

A long sigh seeped from Justin’s lips.  “Which grapevine would this be?”

 

“I heard it from your mother, who talked to Rachel.”  There was laughter in Johnny’s response.

 

“Well, I’ve hooked up with his daughter Shelby.”

 

“Justin…” 

 

Justin held up a hand to pause Johnny.  “But wait, it’s not because we’ve been spending time together that he’s upset.  He doesn’t seem to care who Shelby shacks up with.  He’s pissed at me because he thinks his daughter is some self-destructing mess that’s going to ruin my career.”

 

“And you don’t agree.”  It wasn’t a question, it was a statement.

 

Justin shook his head.  “No, I don’t agree.  She’s got her shit together, Johnny.  She’s almost done with school and she’s getting her degree in Child Psychology.  She’s smart, funny, cool as hell, and she understands me.”

 

Johnny settled deeper into his chair.  “You’ve got a fine line to walk, Justin.”

 

The younger man slumped.  “I know.”  Blue eyes looked up pleadingly.  “I have no idea what to do.  I don’t think Shelby is going to affect my music or my career at all, but I also know it’s pretty stupid to piss off my boss.”

 

“She’s already affecting your career, Justin.  Simply because you’re here and you’re in this mess shows that.  You should’ve known that getting involved with her was going to rile up Peter, no matter how he feels about his daughter.”

 

“I know.”  He was whining.

 

“Is she in L.A. with you?”

 

Justin shook his head, sitting up a little more.  “No.  We figured that bringing her here was a bad idea.”

 

“Well, that was a smart thought.”  Johnny was teasing, but it really had the wheels turning in Justin’s head.

 

“Am I making a mistake being with her?  Should I just cut it off, come back to L.A. to finish the album, and grovel at Edge’s feet?”

 

Johnny’s cool eyes regarded the young man in front of him.  He could see the stress in Justin’s frame, the fatigue in his eyes, and the worry etched onto his young face.  It was obvious that this was causing Justin a lot of stress and anxiety, but he wasn’t sure he had the magic answer.  “Does she make you happy?”

 

“Absolutely.”

 

“And she knows you’re in New York to work on music, not to play house?”  Justin nodded yes.  “Then I would say this;  Peter can’t tell you who to date as your boss, but as her father he has quite a bit of say.  If I were you, I would put all of your energy into making this album and making Peter the CEO happy first.  You and Shelby should stay out of the public eye, don’t get caught doing anything that could upset Peter the Daddy.”

 

Justin’s shoulders sagged visibly, and he ran a hand over his tired face.  “That’s what I was thinking…it’s just…”

 

“Justin, you are the only person who can make this decision.  There can be a balance between personal and professional lives, you know that.  You know that better than anyone, really.  You have to find that balance or you have to choose.  But no one else can do that for you.”

 

A pout formed on Justin’s lips.  “You’re supposed to fix this for me, J.”  Suddenly, the man morphed into the little boy Johnny had known for so long.

 

He laughed.  “Fuck no.  I’m all set on cleaning up your messes, Justin Timberlake.  Now come on, let’s get some food and some beer and talk about anything but work.”

 

“Sounds perfect.”

 

 

And now I cling to what I knew

I saw exactly what was true

But oh no more.

That's why I hold,

That's why I hold with all I have.

That's why I hold.

                   “After the Storm” – Mumford & Sons

 

“When are you coming back to me?”  Shelby’s voice sounded distant over the phone line, and Justin wished he could be with her face to face.

 

“Don’t know yet, B.  They’ve got a few more meetings set up for me, but I swear I’m pushing as hard as I can to get back to New York.  I don’t want to be in L.A. right now.”

 

Her delicate sigh of disappointment had Justin feeling terribly, but he had a job to do.  He was still feeling pretty confused about the whole thing, but his feelings toward Shelby were overshadowing his doubts at the moment.  It also irked him that he felt like he was being controlled.  He wasn’t a teenager in a boy band anymore; he was a grown man with a solid career and he didn’t need to be told what to do or who to date. 

 

“I’ve got to get to class in a little bit, Jus.  I’ll call you later?”

 

Justin nodded, even though she couldn’t see him.  “Yeah, I don’t think I’ll be busy.  You have a good night, okay?”

 

“I will do my best.  You too.”

 

Justin slipped his phone back into his pocket, glancing around the restaurant.  Trace was supposed to be meeting him for lunch, and he was getting very close to being late.  Taking a sip of his ice water, he settled back into the booth he was sitting in and let out a long sigh.  His talk with Johnny had helped somewhat, but he still felt like he was making a bad choice.  Peter Edge should be able to separate business from personal, but it felt like he was holding Shelby over Justin’s head.  For whatever reason, the man wasn’t going to be satisfied until Justin left his daughter alone.  Maybe it would be better for the both of them if Justin did just leave Shelby alone.  It would suck, sure, and he knew they would both be hurt by it…

 

But then he remembered how much he enjoyed being around her.  She was honest, and real.  She wasn’t fazed by his celebrity, and she had this knack for understanding him.  Being with her was the most fun he’d had in a long time.  Was that so wrong? 

 

“It’s hot as fuck outside and it’s only April.”  Trace’s voice broke through Justin’s thoughts, bringing a grin to the singer’s face.

 

“I’m so happy to see you, dude.”  They bumped fists, settling back into their seats.

 

“Rachel says you’ve gotten yourself into some deep shit.”  So much for small talk, Justin mused.

 

“Does that girl ever keep her mouth shut?  I mean, seriously.  She airs my shit out worse than the gossip rags.”  He wasn’t that upset, if only because he knew his cousin had his best interest at heart.

 

“She also says that Shelby is a pretty chill girl and her daddy is being a douche to you.”  He browsed the menu, watching Justin out of the corner of his eye.

 

“That about sums it up.  I’m so fucking confused, man.  I just…I don’t know what to do.”  Their conversation paused while the waitress took their orders, and Trace sat back in his seat and carefully took in the condition of his best friend.

 

Justin looked exhausted, which was a sure sign that he was really messed up about this situation.  Shelby must be extremely important to him, otherwise it would’ve been a no brainer for him.  His career had always been a huge priority for Justin, and he didn’t often let women get in the way of things needing to get done.

 

“What do you think you should do?”  Trace had no advice to give on this one, but he was curious to see what Justin was thinking.

 

The other man shrugged.  “I have no idea.  On the one hand, I don’t want to upset the Label and piss off my boss.  It’s not my usual style, and I understand that this record is important.  But on the other hand, I don’t think it’s right for them to tell me who to date.  I’m not a little boy, I can handle my shit.”

 

“But the kicker is, the boss is her Daddy.”

 

Justin let out a heavy sigh.  “Exactly.  I think he wouldn’t normally have an issue with my relationships, but he’s completely pissed that Shelby and I are hanging out.  He thinks she’s like the plague or something.  I don’t know.  He made it pretty clear that he disapproves, which makes me think that I’m going to be on a pretty short leash.”

 

“That’s fucked, dude.  Shelby and Pete have some serious issues to work out.  Are you sure you want to get in the middle of that?”

 

The look that Justin sent at Trace was dirty, to say the least.  “What girl have I ever been with who didn’t have Daddy issues?”

 

“Touché.” 

 

“I can’t just leave her high and dry because Peter scares me.  I like her, dude.  She makes me happy, and I’m really enjoying getting to be with her.”

 

Trace gestured toward Justin, “then there you go.  There’s your answer.”  Again, their conversation was halted as their food arrived, but Justin’s mind was still reeling.  Was it really that simple?  Was the answer to just be with her and fuck everything else?

 

Somehow, it didn’t seem that easy.

 

~*~

 

It had been a hellish week for Shelby, and she didn’t want to admit it out loud, but she was missing Justin something fierce.  They talked on the phone at least once a day, but he’d been held up in L.A. and still wasn’t sure when he was getting back.  She wouldn’t put it past her father to keep Justin so tied up that he couldn’t make it back to New York and had to complete his album on the West Coast.  And since Shelby was stuck in New York for another month until school finished up, they would have to be separated. 

 

She had a sneaky suspicion that was his plan.

 

With a weary sigh, she stepped off the subway and started the rest of the walk back to her apartment.  This was her long day, with three classes.  She’d spent the majority of the day on campus, working on assignments and catching up on reading between lectures.  Her brain was fried, and she just wanted to put on her pj’s and curl up with a glass of wine.

 

About a block from her apartment, her phone buzzed in her pocket.  She grinned when she saw the number.  The only thing that could make this day better was Justin.

 

“Hey, you.”  She leaned into the phone, almost as if she could feel him through the device.

 

“Hey!  What are you up to?”  He sounded lighter than he had in days, and Shelby hoped that was because he was on his way back to her.  She had her fingers crossed.

 

“I’m just getting home from classes.  It was a brutal day, I just want to crash.”

 

“One more month and you’re done.  You can make it.”  Shelby smiled at his encouragement, wishing it were in person.

 

“So, how are things out West?  Any idea when you’ll be back this way?”  She tried to keep the hope out of her voice, but it was difficult.  She missed him.

 

Justin sighed, which wasn’t a good sign.  “I’m hoping to be on a flight sometime tomorrow night.  I’m sorry it’s taking so long.” 

 

Shelby’s smile was bitter sweet.  She trudged up the steps to her apartment building, slipping the key in the lock.  “It’s okay, I know you’re trying.”

 

“Hey, I’ve got to get going.  You just slip into those red fleece pants of yours, and sip some merlot; I’ll be in New York before you know it.”

 

“Okay…good night.”  Shelby started to hang up, but something snagged at her attention.  Something Justin had said was standing out, and it took a moment for her to process.  “Wait, how did you know I have red fleece pants?”  Her question was answered by a dial tone.  He’d already hung up.  She shrugged, figuring he must have seen them one of the times he’d been over…but still…something felt a little off.

 

That feeling only increased when Shelby entered her apartment.  Candles were lit throughout the entire entry way and on into the living room.  Soft music played in the background; Bach.  This was not how she’d left things this morning, and alarm bells were starting to sound in her head.  Who was in her apartment?

 

“Uh…hello?”  It was probably a bad idea to announce her presence if there was some crazy stalker in her house, but she couldn’t think of anything else to say.  Her brain was processing extremely slowly.  “I have the cops on the phone right now, whoever you are.”  She called, hoping to scare of whoever was making themselves at home.

 

“You do not, and you know it.”  A voice came from the kitchen, and Shelby turned sharply.  Her bags dropped to the floor, and she put her hand on her hips.

 

“Are you trying to scare the shit out of me?”  Her tone was harsh, but the smile that was stretching across her face betrayed her anger.

 

“You really think a burglar is going to light candles and play music?  Really, B.”  Justin set the glass of wine he’d been holding down on a small table in the entry and placed his own hands to mock Shelby’s.  “Hey you.”

 

Forgetting her previous worry, Shelby launched herself into his arms, holding him as close as she possibly could.  Justin’s own arms wrapped protectively around Shelby’s waist and he settled his face in the bend of her shoulder.  She smelled like home.

 

“You lied to me.”  Her voice was muffled by his chest, but she didn’t dare let go for fear he might disappear.

 

“I wanted to surprise you.”  Gently, he put a little distance between them so he could look at her face.  There were dark circles under her eyes, and her face was pale.  “You look absolutely exhausted.”

 

Shelby sighed, letting her head fall back against his shoulder.  “I’ve been working on my colloquium and trying to get through the rest of my classes.”  She gave him a small smile.  “I had to keep myself busy while you were gone so I didn’t miss you so much.”

 

Justin pulled her back into him, happy to have her in his arms.  After another few moments, he stepped back and took her hand in his.  “Well, come on.  I have just the thing.”  He picked up the discarded wine glass and handed it to her, gently tugging her through the house and toward the bathroom.  “A nice hot bath to start, with wine, of course.  Then, I’ve cooked up some food and I’ve got those red fleece pj’s for you to put on.”

 

Shelby laughed softly.  “I think you’ve been snooping through my drawers.”

 

His grin was playful.  “I was tempted to grab the lacy black number I found…but I figured you needed this more.”

 

Against her will, tears started to well up in Shelby’s eyes.  After the hellish week she’d had and the worry she went through about Justin and her father, she was spent.  This…this was the sweetest, most thoughtful thing anyone had ever done for her and she was speechless.

 

“Thank you.”  Her voice was a whisper and she sniffled, laughing slightly at herself.  “I’m such a goober.”

 

Justin placed a gentle kiss on her forehead, pulling her into him.  “Yeah…well, you’re my goober.”  He gave her another chaste kiss and carefully propelled her into the bathroom where a bubble bath awaited.  “Sit.  Soak.  Relax.  I’ve got to finish up dinner, so take your time.”

 

“You are way too good to me.”  She grabbed his arm before he could leave, planting a deeper kiss on his lips.  “I’ll have to make this up to you later.”

 

Justin’s eyebrows went up and a sly grin slid onto his face.  “That was the plan, darling.” 

 

Shelby laughed, pushing him from the bathroom so she could undress and sink into the bathtub.  It looked heavenly, and she couldn’t wait to immerse herself in the hot water.  This was exactly what she needed, and having Justin here made the night the best it could be.  Without haste, Shelby stripped off her clothing, losing layers of stress and worry as the garments were discarded.  When she was finally bare, she carefully lowered her body into the hot water, sighing with relief when she was immersed up to her neck.  “Oh my god.” 

 

There was lavender floating in the air, inviting Shelby to close her eyes, and the soft music lulled her into a state of oblivion.  Her aches and pains started to melt into the water and she let her body relax for the first time in over a week.

 

Shelby would’ve been content to sit in that tub all night, but the water started to get cooler and delicious smells were wafting in from the kitchen.  In their time together, Shelby had discovered that Justin was an incredible cook and it was something he really enjoyed doing.  He often told her it was a nice escape from the normal routine, and it helped him to eat healthier.

 

Patting her skin dry with a towel, Shelby slipped on her bathrobe and padded into the kitchen.  Justin was humming softly, swaying as he stood at the stove, stirring something.

 

“It smells incredible in here,” she spoke softly so she didn’t startle him.  He glanced at her over his shoulder, sending her a grin. 

 

“You’re right on time,” he turned the burner off, removing the skillet from the heat.  “Have a seat, the food is just about done.”

 

Shelby did as she was told.  “You’re going to spoil me, Jus.  A girl could get used to being treated like this.”

 

His answer was another smile. 

 

The candles that had been placed around the house had been put out, the only glow coming from the ones on the table.  It was completely romantic, and Shelby couldn’t quite get used to the pampering.  Being with Justin was an entirely new experience, but she was happy to go along with whatever he had in mind. 

 

“Feeling better?”  Justin’s voice broke through her thoughts and she smiled over at him.

 

“Much.  Thank you so much for all of this.  You really didn’t have to go through all of the trouble.”

 

Justin shrugged, looking a little embarrassed.  “I missed you.  It was a long week.”

 

“How was L.A.?” She asked, even though she wasn’t sure she wanted the answer.  She had no idea what her father had spewed at Justin while he was out there, but she was sure it wasn’t good.

 

“It was busy.  I’m happy to be back in New York.”  He started to pick at his food.

 

“And my dad?  He wasn’t too much of an asshole, was he?”

 

Justin set his fork down, sitting back in the chair to look carefully at Shelby.  “He was very professional and we didn’t discuss you at all, if that’s what you’re asking.”  He didn’t want to be short with her, but he didn’t really care to discuss her father.  He just wanted to enjoy her company.  “I have a lot to do to get this album finished, but I would really like to just forget all of that right now and spend the night with you.”

 

Shelby held up her hands in surrender.  “Sorry.  I guess I’m just worried that he’s poisoned you against me.”

 

The grin that spread across his face was nothing short devilish, and it sent chills down Shelby’s back.  “I think we should test that theory, B.  And we’ll have to be extremely…thorough.”

 

“What do you have in mind?”  She was suddenly feeling quite warm.

 

Instead of answering, he stood, took her by the hand and blew out the candles on the table, plunging them into darkness.

 

 

You saw my pain, washed out in the rain

Broken glass, saw the blood run from my veins

But you saw no fault no crack in my heart

And you kneel beside my hope torn apart

But the ghosts that we knew will flicker from you

And we'll live a long life

So give me hope in the darkness that I will see the light

Cause oh that gave me such a fright

But I will hold as long as you like

Just promise me we'll be alright

                   “Ghosts that We Knew” – Mumford & Sons

 

 

Despite the fact that she was crazy busy finishing up school and prepping for graduation, Shelby couldn’t help but hear the clock ticking down in her mind.  When school was over, it also meant Justin’s recording time was over and he would head back to L.A. to start press and perhaps even performing. 

 

She didn’t know what she would do.

 

Shelby had never planned on returning to Los Angeles.  She loved New York, and she knew there were a plethora of work opportunities for her in the city.  She already had some interviews lined up for after graduation.  But she knew that a relationship wouldn’t work long distance.  Justin couldn’t move to New York, as much as she would love it.  His base of operation was L.A. and her father would never stand for his biggest selling artist to be anywhere else.

 

Shelby swore she was slowly being torn apart.

 

“Shelby?”  A voice broke through her daze, and Shelby shifted her eyes to look at the girl in front of her.  Susan was in Shelby’s class and they’d been working on their colloquiums together.  “Are you still with me?”

 

“Sorry, Sue.  Just lost in thought.”  She refocused on the paper she’d been looking at, finishing up her comments and sliding it back to Sue.  “There.  All done.  It looks great, Susan, really.  I think you have some amazing observations in there, and I love the stance you’ve taken.”  This compliment seemed to placate Susan, and she slid Shelby’s paper over the table top, pointing out the notes she’d made and the suggestions she had.  Shelby smiled gratefully, but she was more relieved that the session was over.  There was too much on her mind and she couldn’t seem to focus on anything at the moment.  Much of it was Justin taking up her thoughts, and she was worried about getting everything done on time for school.

 

So maybe if she got her Justin fix, she might be able to put her thoughts back on school.  Maybe.

 

Things between them had been almost magical.  She had fun with him, and she felt safe.  She wouldn’t say it out loud, but Shelby knew that she was falling very hard for Justin Timberlake, which was what made this situation all the more impossible.  He seemed to reciprocate her feelings, but what would happen when he had to leave?  She almost hated herself for it, but she’d been strongly considering moving back to L.A. just so they could continue to work on this relationship.

 

She felt crazy.

 

What woman up-rooted her entire life for a man and lived happily ever after?  She knew that changing her life just for Justin was irrational, and yet…if he asked her to, she would.

 

Staring up at the building in front of her, Shelby took a deep breath and walked through the doors.  Justin had been in the studio non-stop lately, and she knew that she would find him there still working.  The few songs she’d been able to hear were incredible and she felt extremely privileged to be allowed in on this creative process.  Not many people were given access to Justin’s studio time.

 

A slower beat was thrumming through the speakers when Shelby snuck in the door.  The lights were dim and the atmosphere mellow as Justin crooned into the microphone.  His voice was what dreams were made of, Shelby was sure of it.  The ballad he was singing was obviously a love song, and the intense look on his face as he sang had Shelby swooning.  She knew what this man was capable of with his hands and his body, but his voice alone was enough to set her skin on fire.  Pure sex.  Shelby took a deep breath and attempted to shake off the naughty thoughts running through her brain when she caught the grin that Justin was sending her way.  He knew exactly what he was doing to her and he was enjoying every second of it.

 

When he’d finished recording the section, Justin sauntered from the booth giving Shelby a smirk.  “Hey you.”  His hands reached out and grabbed Shelby’s hips, pulling her into him so he could give her a long kiss. 

 

“Whew, hey yourself.”  Shelby fanned her face, giving Justin a wide-eyed look.  “That song is amazing.”

 

The grin on Justin’s face changed a little, and suddenly he was an eager kid happy to hear praise for his music.  He let go of Shelby’s hips, leading her toward the board where he sat and pulled her into his lap.  Chaz played back the take Justin had just done, making some adjustments as they listened.  Justin seemed happy with it, though.

 

“I think that’s it, man.”  He high-fived the producer. Leaning back in his chair and then placing his hands behind his head, Justin looked back at Shelby, “That was the last song.  We’re ready to send it all off to Los Angeles and see what the Powers that Be think about it.” 

 

As elated as she was for him, Shelby couldn’t help but feel slightly upset at the prospect that Justin was done.  Being done meant he had no reason to stay in New York.  “That’s it?”

 

He caught the look on her face and attempted to assuage her fears.  “For this part, yeah.  The tracks have to be approved, and then they all have to be mastered.”  He leaned forward in the chair, giving Shelby a long stare.  “I’ve already decided that I’m staying in New York until your graduation.”

 

She couldn’t help the relieved grin that lit her face.  “Really?”  She hadn’t want to expect anything from him, but hearing that he was staying for a little while really made her happy.  Granted, graduation wasn’t that far away, but it was something.

 

“Really.  Let’s get out of here.  I’ve had enough of this studio.”  He grabbed her hand, pulling her from the room and out into the humid air of the city.  “I’m hungry, are you?” Shelby nodded, following along in a daze.  She was thrilled that he would be able to watch her graduation, especially since she knew that she wouldn’t be seeing her father.  He had made it very clear that he wanted nothing to do with Shelby anymore, which put a dark cloud over the festivities of getting her degree.  But Justin being there would certainly help take her mind off of all of that.

 

The found a restaurant and grabbed a seat in the back, hoping to avoid any unwanted attention.  “So I was thinking,” Justin started after they’d ordered their food, “When graduation is over…maybe you could come to L.A. for a little while?  I’ll have to be out there to do some album promotion and stuff like that, but I’d like you to be with me.”

 

She’d had a feeling it was coming, and she had been thinking about it a lot, but nothing prepared her for the butterflies that came with Justin’s question.  He wanted her to go with him.  Despite her misgivings, it felt right for Shelby to answer, “I’d love to go.”

 

Justin sat back, relieved.  “Good.”  He was happy to hear her answer, unsure of what she might say.  He wouldn’t blame her for wanting to stay in New York, but he knew that any relationship would be difficult if she stayed.  His schedule was going to get hectic and trips to visit would be few and far between.  Knowing she would come to L.A. with him gave him a sense of relief. 

 

“I’ll look into finding a place to stay.  I don’t think Daddy dearest would like if I showed up on his doorstep right now.”

 

Justin smile turned to a slight frown.  He hadn’t thought of that.  “Don’t worry about that, B.  You can just crash at my place while you’re out there.”

 

“Are you sure?  I mean…I don’t want to be a burden or anything.  I can just stay with a friend or something.”

 

He waved off her suggestion.  “No, you’ll stay with me.  I’m asking you to come out there for me; it’s only fair that I help you out with a place to stay.”  He smiled over at her, grabbing her hand across the table.

 

Her eyebrow rose slightly and she smirked at him.  “That’ll make Papa happy.”  She knew that news of her arrival in L.A. wouldn’t take long to spread to her father, and he would be less than pleased with her arrangement with Justin.  Then again…her father was the reason she didn’t have a place to stay in L.A.  She almost wanted to see the look on his face when he found out.

 

“I’m not worried about your dad, B.  Let’s just enjoy dinner.”  He really wanted to change the subject.  “Are you all set for graduation?”

 

Shelby sighed, “I think so.  I have a few final edits to make to my colloquium paper, and then I can pass it in.  I won’t get my final grades for a while, but I’ll be there to walk in the ceremony.”  She gave him a shy look, “I’m a little scared.”

 

“Scared?”  Justin was expecting excited, nervous maybe, but not scared.

 

Shelby shrugged, smiling slightly.  “Yeah, scared.  I’m good at school.  I know the routine and I can handle the work.  That’s all over now.  No more predictability of a school schedule.  Now I have to step into the real world, and that scares me.”

 

Justin squeezed her hand gently, “You’ll be amazing at whatever you do.  Don’t think of it as a step from the comfortable, think of this as the opportunity you’ve been waiting for.  Obviously you went to school for a reason, and now is the time you’re going to be able to use all that knowledge you’ve worked for.  Now you’ll be able to make your impact on the world.”

 

Shelby sat back in her chair, staring over at the man across from her.  “Well, when you put it that way…”  She finally grinned, laughing out loud at her nervousness and the situation they were in.

 

The waitress showed up then, placing their food on the table and interrupting the conversation.  Justin made sure to steer the rest of their night into neutral territory and away from anything serious that might put a damper on this night.  He didn’t want to worry about L.A.  He didn’t want to work himself up about what Peter Edge might have to say, or how he might react.  Justin just wanted to enjoy this night and celebrate with Shelby.

 

That was enough for now.

 

 

Close my eyes for a while

Force from the world a patient smile

 

But I gave you all

                   Mumford & Sons – “I Gave You All”

 

 

 

“And I would like to propose a toast to Shelby, for all of the amazing work you’ve done and all of the amazing work you will do.  Congratulations!”  Delia raised her glass, clinking it against those closest to her and grinning over at Shelby. 

 

A small group of people were gathered around a table, celebrating Shelby’s graduation with dinner and drinks.  Shelby was seated next to Justin, nestled comfortably under his arm.  She was glowing.  Graduation had been long, but she was so excited and relieved to have the process over.  She was completely scared about the future, but her excitement was overriding the fear.  Having Justin there just made it all better, too.  He was able to make it to the ceremony and he’d been beaming like a proud boyfriend the entire time.  It was his suggestion to celebrate and he was the one to invite everyone along.  Tonight his entire focus was on Shelby, and she was on cloud nine.

 

“How are you doing?”  His breath tickled her ear as he leaned down to speak to her.

 

She turned slightly in his arms to smile up at him.  “I’m fantastic.  This night has been amazing.  Thank you.”  They shared a small kiss, smiles passing between them.

 

Justin had loved watching Shelby all day.  She had been aglow with happiness like he’d never seen before.  Even with the absence of her father, today had been one of the happiest days of her life.  He was proud to be a part of that.  Bringing her to L.A. wasn’t the best idea he’d ever had, and he knew that, but he couldn’t spend time away from her.  He would deal with Peter if he had to, but he wanted Shelby close to him.  It just felt right.

 

He ordered another round of drinks for the table, happy to be apart of this celebration.  Things were going to get a little hectic in his life as soon as they got to L.A., so he wanted to be sure to give all of his attention to Shelby now.  He wanted her to know that he was there for her. 

 

~*~

 

Justin smiled slightly at Shelby’s tangled limbs, and his smile stretched when she let out a loud snore.  It was early, but he couldn’t sleep anymore.  She was still passed out from the night before, happily sleeping off her hangover, he was sure.  While he enjoyed her company, he was happy to let her sleep some more.

 

Besides, he was lost in thoughts he wasn’t ready to share yet.

 

Normally Justin would have been sleeping peacefully next to Shelby, not ready to face last night’s liquor.  This morning, though, the message indicator on his phone wouldn’t stop chiming.  He had seven messages and twelve missed calls all from Peter Edge.  They started off pleasant enough, congratulating Justin on finishing up the tracks and complementing him on a great new record.  They progressively turned frustrated, questioning Justin on his decision to stay in New York, and the last two demanded his return to L.A. to finish mastering the album and begin promotion.  In every message he was reminded that he was under contract and this was his career. 

 

Justin sat at the kitchen table in his apartment, slowing rolling his coffee cup between his hands.  He knew it was in his best interest to head for Los Angeles as soon as possible, today even.  He knew that putting out an album that wasn’t up to par was not an option, and he also knew that every day he spent not focusing on his music was compromising what he’d been working on.  Truthfully, all of his focus should be on getting this album completed, promoted, and making sure it met all of his standards.  But the sleeping girl in his bedroom had taken precedence over everything else in his life, or so it felt. 

 

His normal focus and work ethic had been replaced by Shelby, and Justin knew that this was going to create problems.  He just hadn’t known how many problems he would be facing.

 

Peter Edge had never once mentioned Shelby in his messages.  Instead, he’d called into question Justin’s dedication to his music, the quality of this record, and Justin’s ability to carry this through promotions and appearances.  They were low blows, but Justin knew that Peter had a point. 

 

It was those comments that were on repeat in his head. 

 

His only choice was to book a flight and take responsibility for his career.  He needed to put a few other things on the back burner so he could focus on what needed to get done in order for this album to be successful.  But how could he do that to Shelby?  How could he suddenly step back and change the dynamic of their relationship when he was so happy?  He loved her; that much he knew.  And he also knew that sacrifices often had to be made in his line of business.  Shelby would understand, but that didn’t mean it would affect them.  Was he ready to handle all of that?

 

“Hey, you.  I can’t believe you let me sleep this late.”  Shelby stood in the doorway, a sleepy smile on her face.

 

He managed a smile for her, standing and ushering her into the seat he’d just vacated.  “I figured you needed it.”  Pouring another cup of coffee, Justin set the mug in front of Shelby and topped off his own.  “I was handling some phone calls, too.  I didn’t want to disturb you.”

 

She sipped at the coffee, letting out a sigh of appreciation.  “Phone calls, on a Sunday morning?  Must be business.”

 

Justin sat back in his chair so he could watch Shelby’s reaction.  “I need to head back to L.A.  Tomorrow.”  Her eyes widened at his words, and she gently set her coffee cup on the table.

 

“That’s soon.”

 

“Apparently I’ve been neglecting my duties as a JIVE artist and I need to finish the work on this album and focus on promotions.”  This time her gaze met his head on.

 

“Those sound like the words of Peter Edge.”  Her happy tone was now flat.

 

“Yeah, they are.”  Justin held up his phone, “Twelve missed calls and seven messages.”  He sighed and broke their eye contact.  “He’s partly right, though, B.  I haven’t been as focused as I should be, and that’s not like me.  I don’t want to put out music that I’m not one-hundred percent confident in.  So, I think I should head back to L.A. a little early so I can get to work.”

 

Shelby ran a hand through her hair, counting to herself in order to calm down.  “I can’t leave New York, yet, Justin.  I have things to take care of and some interviews.”

 

“I know.  I know.”  His voice was quiet.  “It’s not the end of the world, B.  We’ll figure something out.”

 

The laugh that pulled from Shelby’s throat was anything but mirthful.  “This is what he wants, you know.  He’s going to tie you up with all things music and business and you’re going to be so busy that you can’t see me anymore.”

 

“So I set a schedule.  I make my own appointments and make sure that I get the weekends off.  I’ll fly back out to New York for the weekend until you can make it out to L.A.”  His eyes pleaded with her for understanding.  “I have to work, B.  Even if I wasn’t quite ready to make this album that doesn’t mean I want the quality to be less than perfect.  It’s still my music.”

 

Shelby held up her hand to stop him, sending a sheepish smile his way.  “I know, I’m sorry.  I don’t mean to put all of this pressure on you.  It just pisses me off that he’s still trying to meddle in my life even though he wants nothing to do with me.”

 

Justin stood and made his way to Shelby, wrapping his arms around her shoulders and kissing her gently.  “This doesn’t have to be about Peter, B.  This is really about us.  Music is still my job, we’ll just have to figure out as we go along.”

 

“You’re right.”  She smiled, apologizing again.  “I can try to tie up some things early, too, so you don’t have to keep coming here to me.”

 

“See?  Everything will be fine.”  He kissed her again, suddenly feeling lighter.

 

~*~

 

A routine developed between them, slowly, after Justin had left for L.A. that next morning.  Their weeks were filled with work; Justin working on the album and Shelby trying to get everything settled in New York.  Their weekends were a whirlwind of flights, dinners, measured moments and stolen time.  Justin and Shelby tried to squeeze as much time together as possible, but it was taxing, to say the least.

 

“Thank you for the opportunity.  I appreciate your time.”  Shelby shook hands with the interviewer and walked from the room, her shoulders heavy with stress.  This had been her third interview this week, looking for positions as a child psychologist with different advocacy centers.  None of them felt like the right fit, though, and she’d only received disappointing calls.

 

She wanted to work in New York.  She knew it would only be a matter of time before she found a job and she just had to keep at it.  But she also knew that getting a job in New York meant not being able to see Justin in L.A. as much as they had discussed.  So, without telling anyone, Shelby had been contacting centers in Los Angeles and setting up interviews for when she went to visit Justin.

 

It was a step they hadn’t discussed, but she wasn’t sure she could live that far away from him.  The distance between them now had been difficult enough to navigate; she didn’t want to prolong this anymore.

 

She just wanted to be with Justin.

 

Checking her watch, Shelby slipped into a cab and headed for home.  It was Friday and Justin was scheduled to be getting in soon.  She wanted to get dinner ready before he got there so he could relax.  It was obvious that flying to New York every weekend was rough on him, but he refused to stop.  She’d even tried to come to L.A. instead, but he’d told her that he enjoyed getting away from things and he wanted her to stay put until she was ready to join him.  Still, though, Shelby knew that Justin wasn’t going to be able to keep this up much longer.

 

Even though she didn’t want to admit it, sometimes their relationship felt impossible.  Their lives existed in two different places and sacrifices would have to be made by one or the other if they wanted things to work.  Shelby didn’t want to be in L.A. and Justin couldn’t move to New York.  Travel was an option, but how long could they make it work like this?  She was scared that he would get too tired of the constant back and fourth, but she wasn’t sure that things would be better if she moved to him.  Her father was in L.A., too, and he seemed to be doing whatever he could to keep Justin from being with Shelby.  And, to be honest, moving scared her.  It was a huge life change.

 

And yet, she knew Justin was worth it all. 

 

He made her life feel complete in ways she didn’t think possible, and Shelby knew she was in love with him.  When they were together, she was happier than she’d ever been.  And when they were apart, she counted the days until they were together again.  He called daily and they talked for hours, when possible.  He put her first all the time, and she was happy to reciprocate.  It was the first time that Shelby wanted to think about someone other than herself.

 

 

I ran away

I could not take the burden of both me and you

It was too fast

Casting love on me as if it were a spell I could not break

When it was a promise I could not make

 

 

“Seriously, Bro, how long are you going to do this?”  Trace’s question met Justin as he slid into the passenger seat of the car.  LAX was packed and all he wanted to do was get home.  He wasn’t prepared to be given the third degree.

 

“As long as I have to,” was his curt reply.

 

Trace lifted his hands in surrender, placing them back on the wheel and speeding out of the pick up lane of the airport.  “Just wondering when you’ll actually be able to take a breath.”  He glanced over at his best friend, noting the dark circles and rumpled clothing.  “You look like shit and you’re constantly exhausted.  I’m just concerned.”

 

The sigh that came from Justin’s mouth was loud and long.  He slumped into the seat and closed his eyes, feeling the pressure build.  “I don’t know how else to make this work.  She’s coming to L.A. in a couple of weeks, but for right now, this is how I’m going to handle things.”

 

Trace sent a sidelong glance in Justin’s direction, not sure if he should keep his mouth shut or not.  Of course, when had he ever decided to keep his mouth shut before?

 

“You’re making this way more difficult than it has to be, J.”  His tone was casual, hoping he didn’t incite a temper tantrum.

 

Justin’s head fell back against the head rest, and he turned to give Trace an exhausted and withered look.  “And how do you suggest I handle this?” 

 

Trace sighed, hearing the sarcasm in his best friend’s voice.  “Fuck it, J.  If you want to fly across the country and wear yourself down before you even think about touring, go ahead.”  He briefly held up his hands in surrender, slapping them back down on the steering wheel.  “I just don’t want to see you burnt out over a chick that’s asking way too much of you.”

 

“She didn’t ask for me to do this; I wanted to.” 

 

Another side long glance was sent toward the passenger.  “And she’s not asking you to stop, either.  I’m sure she knows how stressful this is, why can’t she compromise?”

 

It was Justin’s turn to sigh.  “Because Peter would make our lives hell even without the traveling.  It’s best is she stays in New York as long as possible.”

 

Trace stayed silent for a minute, not sure if his next question was going to piss Justin off, but he was truly curious.  “Well shit.  Don’t you wish it were simple again?  I mean, any other chick and you wouldn’t have to do this all the time.”

 

Silence filled the car for the rest of the ride, but Justin was too lost in thought to notice.  He would be lying if he said the thought had never crossed his mind.  It would be easier if he were dating someone else.  Peter Edge wouldn’t be up his ass constantly; he wouldn’t be flying across the country on a weekly basis; and he could put all of his focus into this new album.  But he loved Shelby, and she was the one he wanted.  He knew that things were difficult and if he weren’t with Shelby he wouldn’t be dealing with all of this.  But he also knew that if he weren’t with Shelby he would be miserable.

 

So, his decision stayed.

 

He would keep this up for a couple more weeks and then when Shelby was able to get here, he could catch up on rest.

 

~*~

 

“Is this the last track to be mastered?”  Justin’s tired voice broke the near silence of the studio.  Both he and the producers had headphones on, and their communications were made with hand gestures and short sentences.  It had been a long day for everyone.

 

“Yeah, man, I think so.”  Chaz had come from New York for the week to help.

 

Justin ran a hand over his tired face, hoping to wipe away some of the fatigue.  His back ached and his head hurt, but he was relieved to be this close to being done.  One more song and his album would be complete.  He could send it off to the label and relax for the first time in weeks.  Shelby came tomorrow, too, which meant he didn’t have to fly anywhere.  He was elated.

 

“Well, let’s get this shit done, man.  I’m in need of a stiff drink when this is over.”  He rested the headphones on his ears one more time and focused all of his attention on the last song for his third album.  It was dizzying to think about.  He was relieved to be done with the recording, but he also knew that the higher ups had plans for him to do heavy promotions and probably a tour.  It made him want to pass out from sheer exhaustion; but this was his life.

 

He loved his job.

 

A half hour later, Chaz and Justin sat back in satisfaction, finally done with all of the tracks.  Now, it was out of their hands.  “Thank the fucking gods, man.  I need a break from this studio or I might go crazy.”

 

Justin chuckled at Chaz’s comment, knowing exactly how his friend was feeling.  “Well I say let’s go celebrate and get drunk.  I’ll call Trace and Tim and see what trouble we can get into.”

 

“I like your style, JT.  Let’s go.”

 

It didn’t take long for plans to form, and an hour later Justin found himself seated in a hazy corner of a bar, sipping on tequila and finally relaxing for the first time in months.  Shelby wouldn’t be in L.A. until later tomorrow, so he was free to get stupidly drunk and would still have time to sleep off his hangover.  He needed this night off in the worst way.

 

“Your drink is almost empty, Bro.  You need a refill.”  Trace slid a fresh glass in front of Justin, grinning from ear to ear.  It was good to have his friend back in L.A., and it was even better to be spending some time with him.  With all the traveling Justin was doing lately, they hardly had the chance to see one another.  “How are you doing, man?”

 

Justin shrugged, feeling the effects of the joint he smoked earlier relaxing his muscles.  “Now that I’ve got this fucking record done, I’m good.”

 

“Has the record label said anything about the promotions you’ll be doing yet?”  He wasn’t one to bring up business on a night out, but Trace was curious if Justin would actually be getting time to hang out, or if he was going to be swamped with a million things to do.

 

Justin’s head lolled toward Trace and he gave him a tired grin.  “I don’t want to think about that right now, dude.  I just want to get drunk and chill out.”  He took another long swallow of his drink.  “Shelby comes in tomorrow and I don’t want to be all stressed out when she gets here.”

 

Trace grinned.  “Being hung over is a much better deal.”

 

In response, Justin flipped him the bird.

 

The two men sat there for a while, taking in the scene and steadily pounding down drinks.  Justin was content to sit back, enjoying the buzz in his head.  He liked watching everyone else in the room, dancing, chatting, drinking.  It made him feel as if he’d faded into the background and he was just another guy out with his buddies.  He needed this night of anonymity. 

 

Trace bumped his shoulder, pointing toward someone in the crowd.  “Hey, do you see that chick over there?  She’s a dead ringer for Chrissy Marks.  Do you remember her?”

 

The name was a blast from the past, bringing Justin back to Tennessee.  Chrissy Marks had grown up just down the street from he and Trace, and they had run amok around Shelby Forest until Justin had shipped off to Orlando.  They’d kept in touch as best as possible, even attempting a relationship while *NSYNC was in its fledging days, but eventually they’d lost touch.  He hadn’t seen Chrissy in nearly ten years, but Trace was right, this girl looked just like her.

 

“Shit, you’re right.  Have you heard from her at all?”

 

Trace shook his head.  “Not since you two broke it off.”  There was a pause as both men remembered, lost in thoughts long forgotten.  “I think that’s her, dude.”

 

Justin finished off the last of his drink, suddenly feeling heavy and not enjoying it.  “I think I’m too drunk to think about anything right now.  I need to get out of here, man.  You coming with?”

 

Trace downed his glass, standing to pull out his phone.  He made a few quick texts, following Justin to the back of the bar so they could slip outside unnoticed.  The night was muggy, summer settling in to stay.  Justin’s head was swimming with thoughts and alcohol, and he was happy for the SUV that pulled up shortly after they’d stepped outside.  He wanted to go home, chug some water, and pass out as soon as possible. 

 

“What time is Shelby coming in tomorrow?”  Trace’s voice pulled Justin from his daze.

 

“Uh…I think her flight comes in around five.  She had some things to take care of in the morning, so she won’t be in until later.”

 

“I’m so crashing at your place, then.” 

 

Justin scoffed, turning to look at Trace with sleepy eyes.  “And where else would you go?”

 

“Touche.”  Trace’s head rested against the cool window as he watched L.A. roll by.  “We are going to be so hung over tomorrow.”

 

“I’m sleeping until my hang over goes away.  I have absolutely nothing planned until B comes in.  I plan to take advantage of that time.”

 

“I’ll be sure to have Rachel stock the house with junk food, then, and we can be lazy fuckers together.” 

 

Justin knew Trace was his best friend for a reason.

 

~*~

 

The incessant pounding near Justin’s head was driving him insane.  The pillow he’d stuffed over his ears was doing nothing to stop the sound, and Justin was about to flip out.  Flinging the pillow, he sat up, searching for the sound.  Buckley was lying on the floor, his head resting on his paws and his tail thumping rhythmically against the hard wood floor.  At the sight of Justin, the thumping increased.

 

“Christ, dog.  Who let you in here?”  He looked and found his bedroom door open, Brennan seated on the carpet with the same anticipatory look on her face.  “Fine, fine.  Give me a minute, will ya?”  Reluctantly, Justin pulled himself from his bed, rubbing the sleep from his eyes and adjusting himself through his boxers.  His mouth tasted like shit, and his head was pounding.  Stumbling into the bathroom, Justin brushed his teeth and splashed some hot water onto his face.  He was still too tired to attempt showering.

 

Buckley and Brennan preceded him down the stairs, jumping and whining as he let them out the back door and into the yard.  As soon as they were situated outside, Justin shuffled into the kitchen, happy to see Trace sitting and eating, the table full of all kinds of foods.

 

“You look like shit,” was the shorter man’s welcome, and Justin grunted in response.  He poured himself some coffee before stabbing at some bacon and filling his plate with eggs, toast, and a bowl of fruit. 

 

“I feel like shit, so I suppose it’s all good.” 

 

“You’ll never believe who I got in touch with today.”  Trace grabbed the last muffin, stuffing his face.  “Chrissy Marks was at that club last night.  I tracked her down and found out she’s been living in L.A. for the past three years.”  He slid his phone over the table, displaying a series of text messages.

 

“No shit.”  Justin felt odd at the mention of her name, vague memories from the night before passing through his addled mind.  “I haven’t seen her in years.”  Flashbacks of hazy summer days broke through his hang over.  “How the fuck is she?”

 

“Ask her yourself, dick wad.  She wants to have lunch today.”

 

Justin’s eyes wandered to the clock, noticing that it was nearly time for lunch right now.  “Lunch?”

 

“I told her it would be a late lunch, considering how shitty you got last night.  She said to just let her know when and where.”

 

Justin finished off his coffee, unsure of meeting up with someone he hadn’t seen in years.  Chrissy and Justin had been nearly inseparable as kids, and as teenagers they’d dated for a while.  They’d thought they would always be close, but life got in the way and they’d lost touch.  He wasn’t quite sure what meeting up would accomplish, other than bringing up a past he’d long forgotten.  But then again…

 

“Text her, tell her we can meet up at two.  Pick some place quiet.”  He stood, stretched his lanky frame, and padded back upstairs to shower and fight off the rest of his hang over.

 

~*~

 

“You haven’t changed one bit.”  Justin’s eyes roamed over Chrissy’s slight build, grinning from ear to ear before enveloping her in a hug.  “I swear you look just like you did when we were sixteen.”

 

Chrissy blushed, pulling away to grin up at Justin.  “Gee, thanks, I think.”  They took their seats, browsing the menu and making small talk before placing their orders.

 

“How the hell have you been, Chris?”  Justin sat back in his chair, taking in the sight of his long lost friend.

 

She shrugged, sipping her water.  “Busy, good.  I’ve been working on a clothing line, and just…living life, you know?” 

 

They slipped into easy conversation, fading back in time as they chatted about whatever came to mind.  Justin had been worried about their meeting, but this was easy.  It was easy and he was truly enjoying himself.  He needed this break from life for a minute, and it was really nice catching up with Chrissy.

 

 

 

 

 

It wasn’t until later that night, waiting for Shelby and hanging out with Trace, that Justin allowed himself to think about how much he missed hanging out with someone like Chrissy.

 

“So, was she as cool as I remember?”

 

Justin looked over at Trace, remembering the kids they used to be and wondering when they’d gotten so old.  “She’s awesome, dude.  It was great catching up with her again.  I’m glad you found her.”

 

Trace nodded his head, glancing at his best friend.  “Don’t you wish it were easy like that again?  I mean…shit, we used to rule the world and not give a shit about any of it.”

 

Justin let his thoughts wander with Trace’s rambling, his words eerily echoing Justin’s earlier thoughts.

 

Wouldn’t it be so much easier…?