Aaron's gotten so big since I really got the chance to look at him. I found out that mom had a sister by different moms and that she was conceived while gramps had been stationed in Texas. She has a daughter around Aaron's age, around 11 and I'm going to see them this week. We get there February 1, but they live in a small town just outside Dallas and I promised to get them backstage passes to the concert with front row seats with me. Just a small perk.
First things first, though-Nicky's 18 and he's still asleep. I'm standing in the bathroom doorway in the hotel room we have in Indianapolis, only his Bucs jersey covering my nude body. I pull the blanket off him and he just rolls over, still sleeping. We got here early this morning, early according to us because we hadn't fallen asleep until six am. It's almost dinner time and I know Johnny is training me to assist him in managing the Boys and Chris' group, among others. I'm getting hungry for two things-food and the man that's sleeping in front of me.

I climb up his body and rest my hips over his groin, grinding them ever so slightly. I know how to wake him up and him not be grumpy. He groans, but no movement. I lean down and gently nip his neck, a guttural growl erupts from his throat. I smile to myself as he moves his head to make it possible for me to kiss him. I place my lips on his. "You gonna get outta bed?" He groans. I kiss him and his hands expertly hold my hips as he presses himself against me. "Really now?" He smiles, eyes still closed. I press a more sensual kiss to his mouth and his arms wrap around me, rolling us so that I'm on the bottom. His hand shoots out to my bed stand to grab a required foil wrapper, his lips attacking my neck and his teeth lightly pinch the skin there. He knows how to get what he wants and he usually gets it. I playfully scoot up the bed, his hands grip behind my knees and pull me back to him so he could press against me, I giggle as I push back. We're both enjoying it, it's a game to us. His lips crash into mine, focusing me on the kiss as he tears the package and slips on the condom. He pushes into me and I push back, my legs entangling his to make sure he can't pull away. He begins a slow, steady pace only to quicken it as we begin to get hot and sweaty. "Mmmmmm," I moan into his mouth, half a moment before he pulls his mouth from mine to watch my eyes and I watch his.

I begin feeling the waves start to swell inside me, about to crest and I know he's going to follow right after me, his eyes betray him. "I love you," he tells me, holding my hips against the bed and thrusts hard and rough.
"I love you." He slams into me and kisses me with fervor as the impeding wave pulls us down with the undertow, my walls squeezing him as he tries to move.
I push him to lay on his back, never pulling out as I sit cowgirl on him and grind on him. He groans. "Keep it up, 'Drya," he warns.
"I can and I'll do as I please to the birthday boy."
"That's right," he mutters, he forgot his own birthday. "Birthday sex." He smirks.
"Perv." I pull off him and lay on him, his hand snakes around me to take care of the condom in the trashcan by the bed. "You can't do it again."
"Oh, yeah?"
"Yeah."
"Whatcha betting?"
"If you can, another round."
"And?"
"If not, my way."
"What does your way entail?" he asks.
"Teasing you until we get back and you can't do a damned thing about it until then."
"Hands off isn't fair."
"Bet's a bet, you know that," I enforce, still straddling his waist and placing a hand on my hip, a finger wagged as it's said.
"Another round means?"
"Anyway you want it and how much you want, when you want."
"Go?"
"Sure," I challenge.

I won by default because we were interrupted. We decided to go out to a nice family run Italian place, by family run I mean Angelo's cousin runs the joint and co-owns it. I walk in and smile at Isabelle, who rushes over in the midst of her tasks. "It's been so long since I've seen you! What have you been up to?"
"I graduated from Julliard last June and I'm here for his 18th, thought I'd bring some business to you."
She looks at Nicky, he smiles and waves at her. "Adios mio! Nick Carter?"
"Si, mami."
She looks like a fangirl so snapping my fingers by her face seems logical. "Oh, sorry. What seat do you want? What do you want to order?"
"A seat in the back and mija, relax some-it's only me and my boyfriend, nobody special."
"Nobody special? Oh, it's just my cousin's friend's baby cousin and Nick Carter de la Backstreet Boys," she fires back. "It's not like he's a celebrity or anything," she remarks, feigning nonchalance.
"He's not, he's just Nick."
"You're just so unaffected, so, so," she retorts, rotating her hand between us as she searches her memory for the word.
"Blasé," I offer.
"Yeah, that," she excitedly bites.
"Because I am and I've known him since before it began."
"Michelle, come here." She waves over a chocolate haired and black eyed girl about 17.
"Yes, Mrs. Valastro?" she answers.
"Take my friend, 'Drya and her boyfriend over to our VIP tables by the kitchen. Please, keep quiet about this."
"Is that N-Nick C-C-Carter?" she stutters.
I curse out Isabelle in Spanish. "Never mind, Michelle," she groans. "Oh, and do keep that confidentiality and disclosure waiver in mind or it's your position here."
"Yes, Mrs. Valastro." The girl scurries away, her tail between her legs. "I'll be serving you this evening."
"It's fine, 'Elle," I tell her, softly giggling.
"Do tell me, how did you get together?"
"AJ broke her heart, we admitted we liked each other secretly and I asked her out a little more than 2 years ago," Nicky rambles, mimicking her and I chuckle for a moment.
She growls at me. "I'm your little cousin's best friend's baby cousin, you love me. Te amo," I joke.
She has a small fit of giggles and sits with us for a moment, talking like old friends.

The evening is quiet and 'Elle relays that she heard from Chris recently, he's been doing good. I update her on Nicky, the Boys and myself as she updates me about Chris, his group and herself. "So you've been touring with him for the past year almost?"
"Yeah, about that."
"You've been with him how long?"
I think about it. "Almost 2 1/2 years now."
"Weren't you with what's-his-name for almost 3?"
"Yes, but Nicky has yet to do what the other one did. Nicky's little brother and sisters are my spies."
"That's how you know about the surprise party?" he questions, surprised.
"Who's?"
"Kevin's."
"Told you I have my sources and you also know I mess with Howie when he sleeps," I tell him, softening the blow with a kiss and an under the table brush of my hand over a certain area.
"We-we all mess with him in his sleep, but pitting my brother and sisters against me, that's just not right," he says, his voice squeaking with the first word.
"Please, you've pitted my cousins against me," I remind him.
"That was one time," he justifies, quieter than he normally is.
"Still counts," 'Elle argues. "How'd he do that?"
"I had decided to visit her at Julliard and didn't call her between just before our concert in Vancouver last year and showing up. I told them they hadn't heard from me and I told Aaron that he could join us we started the tour again. I showed up, found her friend Ginna and she helped me get into 'Drya's dorm room."
"When's your birthday again?"
"Yesterday, but we planned to celebrate our own thing tonight instead."

Aaron joined us in Kansas City, Jane sent him at Johnny's request after he'd had spent the day before with his sisters due to an upset stomach. Today is our, I mean their, Dallas show and it's seven in the morning. I'd gotten up twenty minutes ago, knowing that I don't see my aunt and cousin for just over 15 hours from now. I'll spend a week and a half here, Nicky and Aaron might possibly stay here before we head to Tampa. We just pulled into Texas and the bus breaks down, the 7 of us fly to Dallas from there with security. I thank my lucky clovers it happened ten minutes from the airport. I remember Penny saying that Lainey would be with friends to pick up that person's godmom from the airport we'd been landed in. "What was her name again?" Aaron asks, exiting the aircraft.
"Lainey."
He nods and watches a girl around his age, wearing a cowboy hat with jeans and a pair of boots, a tank top on. She has light auburn hair and my laugh, Aaron is glued. "Hey, Aaron! Let's go!" Johnny calls, everything loaded into the van and we take off for the hotel.

They rehearse and once Aaron's done, it's time for lunch. Johnny tells me to watch him until we return to Tampa, making him my responsibility. Aaron's easy to keep track of, for me he is. "Did you see that girl at the airport?"
"The one with the braids?" I smirk.
"Jeans, cowboy hat, pink shirt, cute smile, laughs like you, shades," he describes her better than I can. "You think I'll ever see her again?"
"Maybe." We eat our pasta and chicken, sipping on iced tea. He ceases all movement when he sees something behind me, quickly pushing his chair back and runs off. I turn to see him stop her, say something and she smiles without a word spoken to turn away. She leaves and he comes to sit back down, thinking. "What happened, kid?"
"I asked for her name and she smiled when her friend said she had to go," he slowly says.
"Maybe you'll see her later?"
"She has the most beautiful sun kissed skin," he smiles.
"Awww, guys, Aaron's got a case of puppy love!" I tease and he throws his napkin at me.
"Shut up, 'Drya!" he responds, blushing.

He opens for the Boys and spots her close to the gate, telling Gary to pluck her from there so she can join him on stage. He sings to her and they dance on stage. She has her hat on, a nice sundress and cowboy boots that match, all nice summery colors. He finishes up his set and heads backstage, this girl in tow. "Melissa, huh?" I hear him ask as he passes me.
"Door open, kid."
"Got it," he answers, winking.
I watch the rest of the show and the only ones backstage are us, security and 'Melissa'. Derek pops his head in to say a Lainey and a Penny are saying they're here to see me, signed backstage tags with 7 signatures on them. "Let them in," I say, waving him off. They come in and I smile, recognizing the other girl from the airport. "I'm Cassandrya," I greet them, offering my hand to them.
The woman with hair that reminds me of Chris takes it, shaking it. "I'm Penny and this is Lainey," she informs me with a smile.
"Hi," the girl waves, looking around me. "Lissa, you're so lucky! He pulled you up!"
"She's your friend?" I ask.
"Yes, since her mom and I were pregnant," Penny supplies.
"Where is her godmom?"
"Not feeling well, so Melissa asked if I'd be willing to take her mom's ticket and I agreed."
"Well, we saw them at the airport and Melissa caught his eye, got him sick with puppy love." I smile. "He asked for her name and she just smiled and walked away."
I look at Lainey, paying attention to details. Jeans, tank, boots and a cowboy hat that pull each other together. "I spotted you because you laugh like me."
"I didn't know I had your laugh," the girl admits, shyly.
"It's alright." Nicky wraps me in his arms and pulls me onto his lap, kissing my bare shoulder. "This is Nick, my boyfriend."
"Hi."
"That's Brian, Howie, Kevin, AJ," stopping long enough to see familiar long braids walk by, "and that's Fatima, she choreographs for these guys."
Fatima offers them warm hugs before racing out. "Nice to meet you!" she shouts, running down the hall. She's always doing something.

Nicky, Aaron and I follow Penny, Lainey and Melissa back to their house.

I finish the lyrics for a song I've had swimming around my brain for so long, now it's off to put it to music in the room containing the piano, acoustic guitar and drums. I get a tune going in my head. "...I've been trying to get at you for you for like 7 years and you're still not here..." I sing quietly to myself. I painstakingly write it out and tuck it away until I feel the need to record it.

Almost 8 years of knowing her, 6 of them being me flirting with her and I did steal one kiss which I got slapped for. She's still with Nick more than two years later, sleeping with him for over a year and just as wrapped up in him as before, more than she had been with AJ. She does call and write us more often, visiting us when something big goes on for us-she's there for our birthdays, special performances, specific appearances, awards and some interviews. She's been there when we had a few photoshoots, making sure we didn't get hurt or too out of hand. When Justin broke his thumb, she was backstage and she tried to get him to go offstage to have it checked right away. He had been in too much pain to even realize she was even taking care of him, now he kicks himself in the ass for it.

"JC!"
I snap out of my thoughts and see Justin in the doorway, hands cupped around his mouth. "What's up, J?"
"Bobbi just got here and-"
"I'll be down once I put this away," I tell him, holding up my notebook.
"You got 'Drya on the brain again," he observes, his eyebrow curving upward.
I chuckle. "No," I deny, "I have sleep on the brain again."
We get to borrow her for our MTV appearance April 15 and again May 23 for our Disney special taping in Lake Buena Vista, Florida. She's co-managing us while single handedly managing her boyfriend's group. Johnny stepped down for a few months, if they didn't fire him. All the leganese they talk confuses me and it's usually about the thing about her other 'client band'.

We just touched down in New York City and as soon as we grab our bags, Chris is bulled over by a small girl with auburn hair who's talking in Spanish. I'd know that voice anywhere. "Let's get out of here before you're recognized. You have a security team to meet."
"What? Why?" I ask.
"The fans out here will do everything in their power to get a piece of you, they'll steal your nasty sweat soaked socks," she in forms us, letting out a 'ew' sound and making a face that speaks volumes of disgust.
"That's gross!" Justin exclaims.
"Why would someone do that?" Lance asks.
"No decency," Joey comments.
"They can have mine," Chris offers, earning a funny look from four of us and a scolding with a smack to his chest. "You can't damage the goods."
"You're family, off the clock doesn't count." She points to a van and we get in, Lance taking the passenger seat. "Good boys," she teases.
Justin takes the bait, growls and barks playfully. "Justin, you're an idiot," I groan, earning a laugh from her as she starts the van.

She drives us to our hotel and we've been in traffic since we got three streets away from the airport. "Any new acts for you to tend to?" Lance asks.
"Let's see, there's Britney and Christina, Justin and JC," she announces with a smirk, watching us via the rearview mirror and I smile. "Aaron, a couple others."
"Have you run into any old friends?"
She made a lot of friends while going to Julliard and she sometimes runs into them randomly. "I recently met Devon Sawa, Ginna's boyfriend that she met through a co-star of his."
"Nice," I comment sarcastically.
"Who's he?" Justin asks.
"He played the actual Casper in the movie near the end, he danced with Christina Ricci," she informs us. "I get to meet Erik Von Detten tonight, we have plans to hang out."
"Is that wise?" Joey asks.
"JoJo, remember AJ's black eye?"
"What black eye?"
I turn to face him. "The day she called him 'wetdick'."
"Oh, that bloodshot mess!" he shouts.
"I think I can kick the kid's ass if need be."
"When do you see Nicky?" Chris taunts.
"First off, go screw a knot and second, I see him again in Tampa the 17th. I have to finish something up here in the city before I fly back late the 16th."
"So you land in the early morning?" Justin asks.
"Yes, he's picking me up at the airport."

"Are you still going to come to the Disney taping?" I ask.
"Yes, Nicky will be there as well and I've already told him to be nice."
"He doesn't bother me as much as AJ."
"JC, anyone that's not you and being with me bothers you." Talk about calling my bluff!

Once we got to the hotel, she disappeared to go meet that kid and we heard them walk to her room. I go to one of our security guys. "What's your name again?"
"Lonnie," he tells me.
"Does she have a walkie?"
"Yes."
"Did he look suspicious at all?"
Lonnie lets out an exasperated sigh. "I didn't think it would be this bad," he mutters. "I know about your history with her, but he didn't look suspicious at all."
"Can you make sure she's okay?"
"Her door is open a bit, you check on her."

I walk over and push the door open to find the two of them bumping shoulders while playing a game, talking shit with the radio playing softly. "You're going down Von Detten!"
"No way, Jay!"
Her bottom lip curls over her top one and she furrows her brow, jabbing the controller buttons with expertise. "WHOO! I win," she cockily announces, spotting me. Her eyes have fire in them. "What do you want, Chasez?"

I hop my plane for Tampa and impatiently wait for it to land, deciding on taking a nap. I had to sign contracts to manage Nicky's group and Aaron only because their contracts have been altered with Jive Records before leaving NYC. I board the plane and go over the tour schedule I've been working on for four months for next year, the flight passing by quickly. I hear the announcement that we are descending and place all the paperwork into the binder it's always in, getting ready. Once we touch down, I step off the plane and into the airport to see Nicky standing there, ready to bring me home for a day or two of sleep. I press my lips to his and he holds me close. "I missed you," he informs me.
"Missed you more."
We get into his Camero, kissing each other hungrily and he smiles at me when we pull apart. "Let's get home."

The minute we got home, my bags were dropped by the bedroom door and are currently being forgotten about. I'm showering New York off me, Nicky helping me and I help him. "Lance and them say hi."
"JC and Justin don't like me."
"Tough shit, I love you." I press my lips to his and I see the smile he has when I look at his face. "Chris likes you."
"I know, it's cuz I keep you happy."
"Mmm," I moan as I make figure 8s with my hips against him. I now stand 5'7" and I should be about 5'9" before I turn 21. "Happier than you think," I tell him.
His blue eyes darken with arousal, his dick pressing against my lower abdomen and I bite my lower lip. We get drunk off our love and permit our hands to travel when he finds my new tattoo on my left hip, a G clef I got in New York during my recent trip. Only I knew about it until now. "You have a tattoo," he says, brushing his fingers over its pattern. "It's a G clef."
"Mmmhmmm, a small one on my hip," I confirm, our eyes never moving from the other's.
"Why?"
"I wanted a tattoo and I thought of what I do for a living." He raises his eye brow. "I recall you saying something about liking G clefs and I got it before I wussed out."
"You're not going to stop."
"Nope, but they're all going to be easily hidden."
He grins mischeiviously and traces his finger along the right side of the back of my hips below where my jeans sit. "I want you to get something here, something that only we would know what it means."
I return the grin. "Never regret a first."
"Okay."
"You should get one, too," I insist.
"Like what?"
"A music note?" I suggest, lightly dragging my fingers over the back of his left shoulder.
"Sure."
He captures my lips and turns off the shower, we finished washing up some time ago. We get out and his lips press against mine again, greedy this time. He guides me to the wall and grabs my thighs, lifting them off the floor to rest on his hips. He slips inside me and we make love, forgetting a condom for the first time ever. It feels so good, so right that I don't care right now. He's holding me pinned against the wall, thrusting into me at a mid-tempo pace and it drives me wild when he rolls his hips. He holds us in place better as soon as his hands go to the wall, his palms beside my hips. "Niiiicccckkkk," I moan softly.
"Cassie," he breathes, his pace quickening and his lips brushing down the side of my neck, across my collar bones and up the other side.
I love how he says my name when we make love, it brings me there faster. "Say it again," I demand, panting and we're starting to become slick with sweat.
"Cassie," he moans, kissing my lips.
I catch his bottom lip in my teeth and pull on it, sucking it gently. "Again," I tell him, letting go of his lip.
"Cassie," he says, my back arching off the wall as I match him stroke for stroke and his breath catches in his throat as we both reach temporary euphoria. Neither of us move, fearing we'd fall to our knees because we're shaking from our release.
I finally realize that we didn't use a condom, both of us are at fault for that. "Nick, we didn't use a condom," I tell him.
"Fuck," he groans. We don't believe in abortion.
"I can take a test in a couple weeks."
"Don't you have to wait a month?"
He's clueless. "I don't know."
"Who can we ask?"
"Titi Bev."
He's scared, I see it in his eyes. I realize I am, too. He nods and slowly lowers my feet to the tiled floor and I quickly wash up as he calls her. "She said to come by before five."
I dry off and walk into the bedroom, noticing it's 11:23 on a Friday. I take a deep breath and dress quickly, jeans and a tank top with my Nikes. The phone rings and I answer it. "Hello?"
"It's Brent. Wanna hang?"
"Uhhh, maybe after we visit my aunt. I need to talk to her about something."
"You sound scared. What happened?"
"Never you mind that. We have to leave."
"Okay, call when you get back."
"I'll have Nick call." I hang up without waiting for his response and the drive to Orlando to see her is nerve wracking, silent.
"I'm not mad."
"Abortion isn't an option."
"I know. We can raise it."
"Or let someone adopt the baby."
"We can figure it out."
"We can cross that bridge when we get to it," I say, avoiding an argument as we pull into her driveway a couple hours later. We hardly ever have silent car trips, but this is an exception.
I get out and stand there, scared to face her. "Come on, babe." He laces our hands together.
I nod and we walk inside. "TITI! Estoy en casa!" I shout into the house.
"Back yard, mija," she replies, peeking around the glass doors. We take a deep breath and head to her. She stands and hugs us. "You forgot to use a condom?"
"Caught up in the moment," Nick explains, sitting down and pulling me to sit across his lap.
I turn and sit in front of him, between his legs. "How long until your cycle is due?"
"A week," I tell her.
"See if it comes this time and again after that."
"Then?"
"Take a pregnancy test."
"How old were you when you had Chris?" Nick questions.
"About your age."
"Don't say a word to 'Lan," I demand.
"I won't."

We leave with just as many, if not more questions than when we arrived. She hugs us both and start toward the front of the house. "I'm scared, titi," I tell her, walking side by side with her.
"If you start throwing up, are tired more often, or have mood swings keep in mind they are flags for pregnancy, but are also connected to stress when it comes to you."
I nod and stop on the front stoop, hugging her again. I'll stop in when we come to Orlando from now on. We get back to Nick's and we discuss our options, the radio used as background noise on the way. We pull up to his house and he calls Brent. "I don't feel like going anywhere, man." He sits next to me, slides his hand through his short blonde hair and I lean my head on his shoulder. His arm wraps around me and he subconsciously rubs my back, trying to soothe our collective nerves. "If you want to hang out here, it's cool." He kisses me on my forehead and sighs. "It's just me and Cassie." He laughs. "Yeah, well, I like her name. Um, yeah, see you in 15."
"That laugh was so fake."
"I know. So, what do we do until then?"
"It's a waiting game."

I exceeded Johnny's expectations and I now have priority and seniority over the Boys and Aaron, just like I'd planned and I refused to let anything stop me; even if it meant I would be a mom of a little baby in just under a year from now. We had the biggest party ever to celebrate and Nick had a huge surprise for me. "Close your eyes," he tells me softly.
I cover my eyes with my hands and I hear him chuckle. I wanted Chris to be here, to see me achieve this promotion and even though Titi had taped it, it's not enough for me. A hand touches mine and a finger traces a G clef and the rest of Ginna's name. "Show me your honey drops," Ginna says and I throw my arms around her neck, hugging her after just over a week of not seeing her.
"I missed you," I moan into her neck.
"She gets a better welcoming than I do," Nicky jokes, everyone laughing.

I have this feeling that something's off with Pookie, mom might know why. I call her and we head to Orlando tomorrow, flying down there will be fun. I roll my eyes and think of what could make her so nervous about talking to me. We all have cell phones now, even her. Hers is covered by Johnny for the time being. She's been acting pretty strange and secretive, it's been just over a month since she's started being awkward on the phone. I will find out why.

We just landed in Orlando and I know she and Nick are staying at Howie's, planning on being there for our show tomorrow. I dial Howie's number and he answers it pretty quickly. "Hello?"
"Hey, D. Is 'Drya around?"
"Yeah, she and Nick are being lazy bums. They've taken over my couch and TV," he tells me, laughing a little.
"Good. I have to talk to her, but don't tell her I'm coming."
"Okay. See you soon."
We hang up and I smile at the car rental worker. "Thanks."
I jump into the silver Camry and head for Howie's house, having told the guys I had to talk to her alone. I said that if anything was going on, I'd let them know.

I pull up and get out, knocking on Howie's door. I hear her laugh coming closer to the door. "Whatever, N-" The smile drops from her face and she whirls around on her heel, mad as hell. "HOWIE! VOY A PATEAR EL CULO!"
She's mad enough to beat the shit out of him. "I need to talk to you," I tell her, entering his house and closing the door behind me.
"You have to tell him," I hear him harshly whisper to her in the kitchen as I step through the door frame.
"I'm not ready to tell him, we don't even know," she argues.
"You had it last month, so I doubt it. He's your family."
"We haven't even told Bob," she explains, pointing behind her.
"Still, you told your aunt, but not Chris? Why?" He points at me.
"Tell me what?" I demand, leaning against the wall by the doorway.
She spins to face me, fear in her honey drops and Nick walks by me. He grabs a root beer and kisses her, standing behind her. "Baby, you knew we wouldn't be able to keep it from him for too long."
"I didn't want him to know until we knew."
"We have it in our room, go take it and find out."
"But she said to wait until after the one coming up."
"Baby, it's either that or tell him it's a possibility."
She sighs, defeated and goes up to her bedroom. She reappears with a foil wrapped item, it looks about the size of a pregnancy test and I look at Nick. "You can either tell me now or I can kick your ass," I threaten him.
He shifts his weight, nervous. "I may have gotten her pregnant and we were hoping to keep it under wraps until after we knew."
"How could you be so irresponsible?" I growl.
"We got caught up in the moment and we both forgot about using protection."
"After this long? I thought it'd be habit by now."
"We've been more cautious since."
"Enlighten me," I demand.
"She's going on the pill, we use condoms."
I nod and she puts the test in the center of the counter on a paper plate. "Now we wait a few minutes," she informs us, standing in front of him again and he holds her. She buries her face in his chest, the three of us watching the result appear oh so slowly.
I'm holding my breath, glancing between Nick holding her and rubbing her back and Howie completely focused on the test. "If she's pregnant, you better have plans to take care of her and the baby," I warn him.
"That's what we had planned."
"She asked the one question in case it happened?"
"Last year in Canada."
"We watched a young mom introduce her infant son to the snow and he said he'd take care of me and his child if I were to get pregnant," Pookie informs me.
I spot some ink peeking out from the top of her jeans as she turns to look at me, her left hip to be exact. Howie releases the breath he'd been holding, meaning she's not pregnant. "She's not, is she?" Can you really blame me for wanting it confirmed?
"It's negative," Howie confirms.
"On to the next subject, that tattoo on your hip, little girl."
"I'm of age to get one," she turns on me, jabbing my shoulder with the Kirkpatrick death finger.
"Not what I meant. What is it?"
She explains her ink and calls my mom, informing her that the test said negative. She tells her I know because I'm here and knows everything that's just happened. She hangs up and calls her friend Ginna, the one girl JC slept with in Germany besides Nikki and Bobbie. Bobbie is such a bitch sometimes. By the time I realize that she's off the phone, she's finished her short rounds of phone calls and is kissing Nick feverishly. "You see what I put up with when they're together in a private setting?" Howie quips.
"Yeah, but what's more important-their happiness or your career?"
"Happiness, but is she down for the ride?" he points out.
"Good point, but she has a good head on her shoulders."
"She does and I think that's why she's able to keep us all grounded so well."
"Definitely." I look at them again because she giggles and I know he said something to make that beautiful sound escape her. "Okay, okay. I get it, you're happy you're not pregnant and you need to save the PDA you two are choking me with for later when you're alone in your room."
"Nice speech, 'Lan, but we're celebrating a lucky hand."
"This time," Howie says, pointing at the counter. "What about next time?"
"There shouldn't be one till we're older and ready," Nick tells him.
"What if she does get pregnant with your kid?"
"Like I told Chris, I'd take care of her and any kids I have with her."

I really like Aaron and 'Drya set up that I join her on the road, seeing as Aaron is touring with her boyfriend's group again. Mom said I could take a week off school to go see my cousin and then go to NYC to see Chris perform! I'm about to board my flight to Zaragoza, Spain to see Aaron and 'Drya, I'm antsy with excitement. "International flight 957 non stop to Zaragoza, Spain is now boarding."
"Bye, mom." I hug my mom.
"My baby is getting so big!" Great, she's crying and won't let me go.
"Mom, they called my flight!" I whine, jiggling around and try to wriggle out of her grasp.
She sniffles and stands up, releasing me. I kiss her cheek and run for the plane, imaptient to get there. I settle in and I know mom will be on the phone with my cousin in less than an hour, crying that I'm on a plane that's going to fly over the Atlantic Ocean to see her. I won't doubt that she'll not only calm mom down, but convince her that I'll be just fine as she laughs on the inside. I'm out of my mind overjoyed that I get to see Aaron, but then I realize if 'Drya and Nick could make it work... Never mind that momentary taste of insanity.

I exit the aircraft with my single bag, looking for 'Drya or someone else I recognize and a hand taps my shoulder. I spin around to see 'Drya with a Mountain Dew cap and aviators disguising her, a big guy a few feet from her. "That's just Kent, pay him no mind."
"I heard that, little one."
"Yeah, yeah." She giggles and we head for the van, her cap resting on her lap while her shades end up on top of her head.
I look at her sitting up front and see that she has new ink peeking out from the top of the right side of her tank top, but that she's stressed out. "What's on the planner?"
"We have 3 hours before Aaron gets on stage and four when it comes to the Boys, so we have to go straight to the arena. You get to drop in on their rehearsals."
"Is Aaron there?"
She turns in her seat to look at me, a smirk on her lips and her honey drop eyes are tired and a bit dull. I can still see the love she has for Nick, that hasn't faded. "You still like him. How long has it been since you saw him last? Or talked to him?"
"I saw him at your Christmas bash, a couple hours the day after. I heard from him last the night before last via e-mail."
She smiles and sits back against the seat again, facing forward. "You've kept in touch pretty well over the past few months."
"Does he talk about me?"
"When the press isn't around, yes."
I smile like she does when Nick is with her or on the phone with her. "Mom says I shouldn't worry about him."
"She says that because she doesn't want you to be like I was with Alex."
"Speaking of him, are you talking to him again?"
"I manage them, but I do talk to him as a friend and we don't hash up the past."
"Has Nick done anything sweet?"
"When doesn't he?"
We pull up to the place they're performing at tonight and get out, my bag over my shoulder. "True. Did you tell him?"
"Nick knows, but nobody else does."
"Chris and the guys taped their new video."
"I know, 'Tearin' Up My Heart'. They stopped in to say hi?"
"Yup, he asked why you don't talk long anymore."
"I'm managing the Boys full time and it's so time consuming."
"I guess it makes sense."
"I also manage Aaron and co-manage Chris and the guys."
"True, true."
"Shhh, I only told Nick, so shhhh," she whispers, holding a finger up in front of her lips vertically.
I go ninja and we walk in silence to Nick's dressing room, getting there flawlessly. I love how 'Drya and I have conversations that just flow the same this one had, on a regular basis on top of that. I know you'd expect her and Molly to be as close than her or I had dreamed of being with each other, considering she's 18 and I'm around half her age while Molly is just over 2 years older than 'Drya. I set my bag behind the standing curtain and flop down onto the loveseat, audiably sighing. "He's missed you, too," Nick informs me, leaning back on the counter behind him. He smiles at her and she blushes with a grin.
"How do you do that? It's just it's been over 2 years and you still make her blush with one glance or smile," I voice.
"I don't even know, but I like it." He shrugs, wiggling his nose at her and she lets out a giggle. She's like a school girl with him, but they're happy together and I don't think they've had any problems.
"He's the only one that gets to me the way he does," 'Drya admits, pulling her lips inward and she slowly glances in his direction to catch him watching her with a soft grin because of the set up of the room. Okay, the couch I'm on is pressed against the wall to the left when you come in, sitting against the wall that runs from the door to the right corner is the loveseat she's on and the counter is a corner one and it's sort of like corner cabinet thing. There's a name for it and I'm sure of it, but not sure what it is. It's triangle shaped and he's leaning on it, turning my older cousin who loves him like crazy into a giggling little school girl.
I guess I'm sort of like that and it's only when it comes to Aaron. My hair has tiny braids in it, kind of mixed in and I knew I'd be seeing him today. I have on a multi ocean shade dress and black flats, my hair curled slightly. A knock alerts us to move fast and I quickly tiptoe into the bathroom soundlessly. "What's up, bro?"
"When is this done? When can I go home?"
"You're here until we are, April 24th or something. What's up?"
"Oh, nothing." I hear Aaron's feet scuff the floor and I hear my mom scolding me for that habit I had a couple years ago.
Nick chuckles softly. "Come in here, you know it's all between us."
No, Nick! Fail! "Uh, okay."
I hear him drop onto the couch, Nick's feet shuffling quickly by the bathroom door. "What's eating you up?"
"It's just I like this girl and I dunno how to tell her, especially when I see her," he sighs.
"Just be yourself and it'll come out naturally. Keep in mind you might not have the feeling returned, don't ever doubt a girl," he encourages him, pushing him to tell that girl how he feels.
"What do you mean, Nick?"
"I doubted Cassie would ever give me a chance, that she hated my guts and that my pranks were out of cruel intentions."
"You got her, though."
"I'm telling you that girls are unpredictable if you don't know them well enough."
"Are all girls like that?"
Nick shifts his weight, snickering. "More than you know, few and far between aren't."
"Hey!" 'Drya exclaims.
"Baby, you're one of the few and far between," Nick reminds her.
"Mmm," she hums.
"Trust me, tell her and see what happens. Same way I told her for, I wanted to know what would happen and now we've been together since."
It's quiet for a few minutes before I here Gary tell Aaron he needs to be on stage for a run through in five, escorting him out. "Thanks, Nick." He shuts the door and Nick knocks on the wall, signaling it's safe to come out.

During the show, I had been in the second row and he did great. I get backstage and wrap my fingers around his, making him jump. He quickly recovers within a fraction of a second after his eyes land on me, throwing his arms around my shoulders and pulls me into one of  his tight hugs. "Tay!" he shouts as he jerks me to him, muttering about missing me.
"Missed you more."
"I'm so happy you came! How long?"
"Same here," I softly tell him, hugging him as tight as he is me and giggle for a moment. I told you I get like 'Drya is with Nick! "Two weeks with 'Drya."
"Where will that bring us to?"
"Orlando," I smile at him.
"Really?" He's so cute when he gets excited and his eyes light up like this.
"Yeah, until May 4th or so."
He jumps in the air, fist toward the sky and smiling. "YES!" he cheers happily.
I take a deep breath and smile at his reaction, hooking my hands together behind me. "I have to wait for summer vacation after this before I see you again."
"Yuck!"
"It's just a little more than a month," 'Drya assures him, walking over with a walkie attatched to her palm and ruffles his hair as she passes.
"How does she do that?" he asks as fast as he can, pointing in her direction behind him.
"She's been like that for as far back as I remember."

It's the 12th and I'm flying out to spend a couple days with Pookie overseas, to surprise her. I should be there soon, maybe an hour and Johnny knows other than Lance. I know Johnny didn't agree at first, but I argued that I was going to check on her and he caved. I get to Valencia, finding out that their plane is late once I check my voicemail and she said Karl is to blame. I call her and ask what hotel, jumping in a cab to get there. I hang out in my room for a few hours, a call comes in that tells me that she's landed and tell her that I'll call when I 'get home'.
They go to the arena the Boys perform at tonight and I leave the room with just enough time to get there as they do, maybe security will let me slip in unnoticed since most of them know who I am. I walk up to one of the security guards and smile, his hand grabbing hold of my shirt collar. This guy doesn't know me, obviously. "Miss Cassie, I got a trouble maker."
She sighs into hers. "Is it one of the Boys or Aaron?"
"No, miss."
"Thanks, Karl. I'll be right there."
He releases me and I step just far enough away that he can't reach me, I'm upset to say the least. The door opens and she spots him (Karl?) first, hearing him out before looking at me. Her jaw drops, hugging me moments later and I wave like an asshole. "He didn't recognize me," I tell her grumpily.
"I'm sorry." She turns to Karl and smiles. "This is my cousin I told you about, Chris."
"I'm sorry," he apologizes.
"Just remember me."
"Who could forget the pitch of your voice, sir?" he jibes, trying to remain serious and fails when a smile cracks his face.
"Cassie?" a small kid's voice calls through the walkie.
"Aaron?" she fires back.
"What happened?"
"It's nothing big, just an unannounced visitor."
"Okay."
"Take Tay to the stage with you, Lil Bear."
"Will do, Cass."
"Tay? My baby sister?"
"Yes, she got to me yesterday."
Keep in mind that I'm talking about April 11 in the States and the 12th according to Spain. They got here with a couple hours to spare before the show. We go backstage and I spot Howie, talk to him for a moment. We plan to go out when we get the chance and plan to hang out over the next few days I'm here, saying hi to the other three guys on the way to Nick and Aaron's dressing room. We get to the door and the sound of Tay laughing brings a smile to both of our faces, knowing Aaron is the reason for it. We see him and Nick trying to do a Stooges' routine, making her laugh uncontrollably. Pookie laughs at it herself for a minute, breaking it up by tickling them and I see that Tay had cried from laughing so hard with her arms wrapped around her body. "Oh, my sides hurt," Tay forces her mouth to work so that we know.
"I deal with it everyday," Pookie jokes.

They go onstage and she calls Johnny, informing him that I arrived safely before requesting the other four guys know she's doing good. I wait for her to hang up before calling her bluff, catching her in a lie. Her cell slips across the marble dining table top, coming to a rest in the middle and I look at her. "Why did you bullshit Johnny about how you feel?"
She scoffs and rolls her eyes. "Chris, I don't want them to stress about my health. l will be fine. I'm just tired is all."
"Are you sure it's not a symptom of something other than exhaustion?" I query, pushing her for the truth.
"Yes, Howie has already had me do a physical before we left."
"That was 3 1/2 months ago." She groans, tensing up her body in frustration. "Just when you're home again, get checked."
"You'll stop pestering me about my health?"
"Yeah, until you look like shit again."
She purses her lips, shaking her head and her eyes rolling simultaneously. "Fine," she sighs.
"You know I'd rather hear it's nothing than let something big go untreated, maybe something like Scarlet Fever," I fire back.
"I said I'd get checked."

We get Stateside and she makes an appointment for 11:30, two hours from now. I'm praying that they don't find an underlying cause of her exhaustion, only having been working too hard and not sleeping enough. I keep Tay with me, knowing she's stuck with Pookie otherwise. "Chris?"
"Yeah?" I softly reply to my baby sister, looking at how grown up she's become in the past 8 years and realize her birthday is in a little over 2 months.
"You're too quiet."
"I'm worried about Pook."
"Tell me how she got that nickname again." She always makes the perfect distraction at just the right time and I can't explain my gratitude about it so that you understand.

 I miscarried? I was pregnant, but the stress caused my body to naturally abort it. Should I tell Nick? Does Chris need to know? I call Ginna and smile weakly when she answers. "What now, girl?" she teases.
I switch lanes in the rental, on the way to MTV studios for the guys' first MTV appearance. My mind is racing from what I was told. "I need your honest opinion," I sigh.
I tell her and she's silent for a few minutes, I'm a block from the studio. She releases a breath, something she does when she thinks. "You should pull Nick aside and let him know."
"But you know he could flip out."
"Not if he cares."
"But-"
"If he loves you, he'll be supportive."
"I see him again in a couple days. Could you fly to Tampa with me?" She's quiet again. "Please? I'll set up the tickets and everything," I barter.
She heaves a heavy sigh. "Fine, you're lucky I work for my cousin at his restaurant here in the Big Apple."
"We leave day after tomorrow, early morning around 6."
"What the fuck?"
I smile to myself cheesily. "It's one we can sleep on and I'll tell Nick that you're tagging along."
"You better tell him."
I nod, aware she can't see me and roll my eyes. "Of course."
I hang up and call Chris, knowing they're prepping to get to the studio. "MTV or hotel?" I ask.
"We leave in half."
"I can be there in 20." I end the call and get to the hotel lobby in 15 minutes by taking the back route.

I poke him in his side, forcing him to turn to hug me. His face lights up and his green eyes twinkle with happiness concerning my being safe. "I'm glad you could make it, Cass."
So many people are jus calling me Cass, Cassie, Sandy or 'Sandrya and hardly anyone ever calls me 'Drya anymore. I don't mind. "I am, too."
"What did the doctor say?"
"I need to up my proteins and iron and I should be able to cope better." I know I just lied to my cousin, but it matches up to the original pregnancy scare and I'm not rehashing that.
"So it's just a lack of certain vitamins or whatever that makes you so tired. Makes sense," he says, shrugging it off and JC gives me the death glare from hell.
I hug him, Justin and Joey. Tay steps beside me and JC pokes me, slides his eyes in her direction. "Tay-Tay, can you walk up with 'Lan?"
She nods and does as I requested, his arm going around her shoulders while hers loops around his back. "You lied."
"No."
"What's really causing it?"
"I have allergies." Bullshit lie #2.
He sighs, annoyed because I won't tell him. The whole ride to MTV, JC and Justin are whispering back and forth between one another. Justin drags Lance into it and he looks at me, really noting quite a few things by the look on his face. I would've been nearly 2 months pregnant if I hadn't lost the pregnancy and I slouch down in my seat, my hand resting on my lower abdomen. I begin chewing on my top lip, so many things flying through my head and I know I need to focus on their appearance on TRL. I close my eyes and shake my head clear of these thoughts, furrowing my brows at the look in Lance's eyes. 'You were pregnant,' he mouths. It's a statement, not a question and I know he's figured me out.
I pull a deep breath in through my nose and close my eyes, giving him a short nod. Everyone that knows me is more than certain that if I were to become pregnant, it's Nick's child. Lance leans over and puts his hand on my knee, silently giving me his condolences. "I'll be fine."
His eyes asks how far along I would've been and I mouth 'two months', pretending to stretch. He puts a finger to his chest and makes an X over his heart, promising not to tell anyone.

I fly home and Nick picks us up, Ginna and all. "Hey, baby," he happily greets, holding me close and kissing my lips in a way that makes me melt every single time.
"Hey," I coo. Ginna pokes me in the back of my neck. I know she means well, but I wanted to wait until Tay was occupied. "We need to talk once we get settled in."
"What's up?" he asks, worry flooding his eyes. "Did I do something?"
"No, Nick, it's nothing like that. Something happened and we had no control over it." He nods, but drops it for now and tangles his fingers in mine.

We get home and I unpack my clothes, the dirty ones ending up in the washer. Tay and Ginna are playing in the backyard and I start prepping dinner, but Nick stops me gently. He takes the pack of chicken out of my hands and wraps his arms around me once he puts it in the sink, kissing my forehead. His eyes show patience, eminate love and curiosity. "What did you need to tell me?" I knew it'd bother him.
"Promise you won't get mad?"
"It's something we had no control over, right?"
"What happened in the end, yeah."
"But we caused what started it or I did." His eyebrow shoots up.
"We did," I admit, pointing between us. "I miscarried."
"I thought it was negative?"
"A false negative. I lost it a week ago, the doctor in New York found trace amounts of the hormone in my system and it matched up with why I have lowered protein and iron levels." I look at my hands on his chest, scared to look him in the eye.
He swallows and pulls me closer. "We aren't ready, not yet."
"Why didn't the doctor down here catch it?"
"Maybe it was too soon?" he suggests.

He wasn't mad in the least bit, he just wanted to know why I was acting different. It's been a week and all he's wanted from me was to know I still love him, showing his affection as well. Ginna goes home today and Tay went to visit Titi for a few days yesterday because she homesick. I hug Ginna again and Nick smiles at her, hugging her with his free arm. Neither of us want to let go of each other's hands. "Are you sure you're not upset?" she asks him for 100th time.
"I'm sure, it wasn't our choice and we aren't ready."
"Just making sure." She turns to me. "Are you going to be okay?" she asks, pulling me into another hug.

I knew something hasn't been right with her, but I never expected it to be that uhm serious. She lost a child she hadn't known she was carrying and Stacy is pregnant, she and Ford are excited. I know Stacy won't tell anyone and I cleared it with Cass via e-mail yesterday, so I sigh. "Aren't you happy to have a niece or nephew in a few months?"
"I'm happy for you."
"What happened, James?"
"Well, last week 'Drya found out she had miscarried and she would've been two months along."
"Was it her boyfriend's?"
I scrunch up my face at the lounge door. "Of course, he's the only person she's done that with."
"Oh, sorry."
"She's good when she's in a relationship."
"Has she told him? Did he know she was expecting? How did he react?" she worriedly inquires, firing them off faster than I could utter a sound.
"I have no idea, I haven't spoken to her since about it and it's not counting asking if I could tell you."
"Will she talk about it?"
"I don't know. Call her and ask."

We get to Houston and Chris pulls me aside. "I know I should've asked right after she left, but why did you put your hand on her knee on the way to MTV?"
"She was having a bad day and I wanted her to know that I'm here if she wants to vent."
He squints his eyes at me for a moment and seems satisfied with my reply. "I will find out if it was something else." He walks away calmly.
"He knows something's up, she's almost like his sister," JC informs me, scaring the beans out of me because I didn't know he was standing beside me.
"And you still act like a puppy when she's around," I retort, rolling my eyes as I walk away.
How is it any of his business anyway? He can't keep a secret for bupkiss, trust me. After three years, I know for a fact that he can't even if his life depends on it and I know that he and Justin are going to harrass me for the information I have concerning her.

I text her and she responds, personal matters being discussed. The conversation lead to the miscarriage and she said Nick didn't know, but she plans on telling him soon. I think she did tell him, but it's all between she and Nick and I respect that. 'Are you okay?'
'Of course I am. See you May 31. :)'
'You're a goof.'
'Who's my older cousin again?'
'Valid argument.'
'I know it is :P'
'I have to rehearse, does it end?'
'No, not until you stop doing it.'
'Might be never'
'That's what I'm praying for'
'Me too'
'Tell the other guys I say hi g2g'
I nod and four pairs of eyes are on me, curious as to who it was. "Cass says hi."

I've been looking forward to today, Kiss 108 for the Boys today and Z100 tomorrow for the guys. I get to see my annoying older cousin after a month and a half tomorrow. My phone rings and Aaron jumps at the sound, smiling like a fool. I think he could be hoping it's Tay, the one girl he's become more than infatuated with. I look at it and it is her, I answer it with a teasing grin on my face. "Hello?"
"Hey, 'Drya. How's the tour?"
"Good."
"How's Aaron?"
"On the edge of the seat."
"He knows it's me," she says, so sure of herself.
"I dunno," I tease.
"It's Tay, isn't it?" Aaron antsily asks me, poking me in the side.
I laugh and hand him the phone, sitting with Nick. "You had to mess with him," Nick comments.
"Amuses me for a minute or two," I shrug.

They go on stage and Aaron is gabbing away like crazy with Tay at such a fast speed that I can't catch half of it, but she can probably understand him perfectly fine. I roll my eyes and shake my head, Aaron ends the call with 'I miss you' before I get my phone back nearly 2 hours later. "You miss her?"
He looks at me, a tiny hint of a smirk appearing on his lips and he nods. "I miss her alot, she's fun."
I smile back to him sweetly. "I'll see what I can arrange."
He throws his fist into the air and pulls it back down quickly, quietly celebrating his victory. He jumps up from his seat and hugs me, shouting his thanks in my left year while I chuckle at his excitement. "What's all the excitement about?" Nick jokes at Aaron's zealousness.
"I told him I'd see what Titi would say about Tay visiting us on the road again."
He kisses me and smiles, looking at Aaron. "Just ask her out already, do it before it's too late."
"But what do I do? What do I say? What if she says no?" Aaron fires off, pacing back and forth.
"Follow your dreams and your heart," Nick tells him, pointing at his little brother's heart and pulls him to his side to ruffle his hair with a noogie.
"Stop it, Nick!" he shouts, pushing him away.
"Nick, quit," I softly say.
"But it's fun," he replies.
I give him a warning glance. "Please."
"But-"
"Nickolas."
"Baby-"
"Gene."
He shows his slight annoyance in his eyes. "What do I get?" he questions, folding his arms over his sculpted pecs.
I stand up and pull him closer to me by his shirt with one hand, forcing a welcome heated kiss to his mouth. He holds me tightly and reciprocates the emotions in the same way I had, his tongue requests entrance. Our tongues mingle, touching and we moan into each other's mouths hungrily. He pulls me to be able to sit down on the couch I had been occupying minutes earlier, my body straddling his and he moans into my mouth greedily when I rock my hips. His hands grab hold of my waist and push me down into his hips, our body temperatures rising quickly. "Nick, not here," Kevin says, slapping his head and he bites my bottom lip by accident and I bite the corner of his lip.
"Kevin," I pout.
"Save it for the hotel or the bus," he explains.
"You two are worse than AJ," Brian complains.
"At least Nick's getting with the same girl night after night," Howie defends.
"When did you bust your lip?" Brian asks.
"When Kevin slapped Nick's head and he bit me by accident," I growl, grabbing a towel to tend to both of out injuries. I grab a couple ice cold bottled waters, pour some on the corner of it and give it to Nick for his. I repeat the makeshift cold press for my lip, the six of us plus ten security team members deep head for the bus and they surround Nick and I. Now I'm in a sour mood, great and what's worse is Nick is a little ticked, too.

Laying in the bed after what seemed to be an endless night in the ER for stitches on the inside of my swollen bottom lip, finding a way to kiss without aggravating the injury and a steamy session of love making is just what we needed. He traces my bottom lip with my face turned toward his, my head on his shoulder and worry fills his eyes. I aim a quizzical look at him. "Will Chris be mad at me for this?" he inquires, tapping my lip with his thumb.
"No, not after I explain it."
"What if he does?"
Nick doesn't want my very overprotective older cousin coming after him for something he didn't do intentionally. One thing you need to understand is that Nick can be such a sweetheart and when he does get mad, he tries like hell to walk away from the problem before he decides to swing. Sometimes he even looks for me or can be found beating the crap out of Robotnik or King Koopa (aka Bowser), they help him take out his aggression or I calm him down. "Ocean, get some sleep," I say, lightly pecking his cheek.
He wraps his arm around my naked body a little tighter and kisses my head, sighing happily. "I love you, Cassie."
"I love you, Nick." I know, sappy love story. Things aren't always the same and it's not true until you write it. There's so much I haven't even begun to tell you.

It's just flying by, the tours for both Nick and Chris and I don't know how I'm bouncing between their tours with this much expertise. We're in Baltimore and Josh has been staying at his parents' up here to get away from his public life, to be just Josh again. I call him on the way to rehearsal, the Boys and Aaron already there. "Hello?" Karen asks.
"Hi, Mrs. Chasez. Is Joshua there?" I greet her politely.
"Who is this?"
It's been too long since I've talked to her and that just confirmed it. "It's 'Drya."
"How have you been, honey?"
"Good, just busy as ever. Yourself?"
"Same old things, just another day."
"Josh tells me that you're managing *NSYNC, your boyfriend's group and Nick's brother, Aaron."
"Yes, miss." He didn't tell her that I broke it off with AJ nearly 3 years ago, did he?
"How is Alex?"
I'm killing that guy, the C in *NSYNC and I will have him replaced. "He's good. Has Josh informed you that I haven't been dating AJ for almost 3 years?"
"No, he hasn't. Who have you been seeing?"
"Nick Carter."
She's silent for a moment. "The youngest one from the same group?"
"Yes, him," I coo, grinning like a fool as I enter the arena.
"Cassie!" Nick calls out to me, striding over to me and pressing a kiss to my cheek while hugging me tight. "Who's that?"
"Karen, Josh's mom," I snarl.
"What was said this time?"
"He didn't tell her that we're together and have been for three years now."
His eyebrows raise in the classic 'oh, shit!' way and he kisses me, leading me down the hallway. "Will you be stopping by later on or something, sweetie?"
"Yes, after rehearsal." They have two rehearsals and then a show before we leave for Philly.
"Joshua will be here in a couple hours, do you want me to tell him you're coming over?"
"No, I want to surprise him. Thank you."
"We miss you, hon. Love you."
"Love you, too. I missed you as well."

I hang up and laugh, earning myself glances which question my sanity while I shove my phone into my pocket. Fatima comes running in and skids to a stop, glaring at Nick with her arms folded. I stop laughing when she says his name only to start cracking up again, forcing him to pinch my side lightly. "It's not funny," he says.


I pull into his parents' driveway and get out, going it alone. Moments after I knock on the door, Karen opens it and pulls me into a warm embrace that has been long awaited for. She has the biggest smile on her face as she inspects me from head to toe, noting all the changes that have happened since we seen each other last and I do the same to her. "How have you been, honey?" she greets me.
"I've been good, crazy busy."
"Nick is always welcome in my home, you know," she informs me.
"Thanks, Mrs. Chasez. I thought I'd discuss some personal matters with Josh first."
She smiles, returning to her task of cutting up peppers and deseeding them prior to placing them onto cookie sheets. I sit on a stool at the end of the counter, watching her stuff them with her pork mess, hamburg and rice mix and she glances at me. "He's been in the backyard with his guitar since he got here earlier today, writing out his heart."
I dip my head down, thinking through my words before I speak and look into her eyes with a fake smile. "His career with the guys will take off 5x faster here, compared to Europe. It's only a matter of the Disney special hitting the airwaves and a couple other publicity stunts before they're all as known as Nick and the Boys," I explain.
"What does that mean, 'Drya?" she asks, pausing with a spoon in her hand to look at me midway through scooping more mix from the pan.
Her brow furrows, something that's always made me sketchy. "You'll have to be careful. You'll have to deal with paparazzi and crazy fans. Some fans aren't too bad, but they're extremely nosy."
"Alright..." she slowly says.
"It just means that there will be minimal privacy in public, everything will be exposed unless he learns to keep his mouth shut and he's going to require more media coaching than the other guys. Josh has the most trouble with keeping secrets."
She looks at me with displeasure. "That's why we left Orlando when he and the group went to Germany, moving back here."
I nod, understanding what she means and take a small bowl of the stuffed pepper mix she offers me happily. It still tastes the same as when she made it back in Orlando, making me smile at the memory. There's some stuff that won't ever match things from before you get wrapped up in the whole celeb shit. "I know and I hope that they remain as respectful as they've been," I wish for her family, the residents having been great to his family thus far.
"Thank you, dear." She reaches over to place her hand over mine and a soft smile before returning to her task.

The back door opens and closes, slamming in its jamb. "What do you want, Cass?" a very guarded Josh asks me.
I allow my honey drops meet his crystal blues. "I came to talk to you," I cooly reply, although my blood is coursing through my veins like the wax in a lava lamp after its warmed up. I want so badly to jump onto the counter, run across it and kick his ass. I'm better than that because I respect his family, but my respect for him has diminished since he broke my heart.
He sighs, snapping his head in his mom's direction and I know he's beyond annoyed. "Fine. We can talk in the basement."
He leads me down the hall after I hug his mom, making sure she knows to keep everyone out of the basement. He pops in his room to place his guitar on its stand, locking the door and sits in the moon chair across from the bar. Yes, they have a stocked minibar and a fridge for non-alcoholic drinks. "You wanted to talk, so start talking because I want to relax without you harassing me," he snaps at me, beginning to sound like he's barking at me.
I give him a warning glance, ready to jump on him if need be. I drop my head into my hands, agitated to the bone. "Look, I know you didn't tell your parents about anything, especially about why you were slapped or who I'm with," I say as calmly as I can manage.
"I have my reasons," he snarls, defending himself and crosses his arms over the front of his body.
"Which are what exactly?"
He silently gets up, walks over to the bar and goes into the fridge. "Want a drink?"
"Got a Pepsi?"
He puts the 12 oz blue can on the bar counter, pouring himself a Jack & coke. "Here," he quietly tells me, handing me the cold can and goes to sit on the chair next to the loveseat I've stretched out on. I'm comfortable and waiting for his justifications. He takes a deep breath before beginning to rationalize his reasonings. "I still feel the same and it's been 8 fucking years, so I can't even face it and I don't keep them informed about your love life. I guess that I'm hurt and in denial." He doesn't remove his eyes off his glass.
I think this admission through, rummaging around my emotions. I can't even begin to feel remorse, not after the way he'd stomped on my heart so long ago. Telling a girl you like her just to ask some other girl out, knowing the first girl really likes you back just ain't something you do. It took me what felt like forever to heal from it. I keep a blank face, not a single emotion evident. "You made your bed, now you get lie in it." I pluck the tab, filling the momentary silence as I watch it move. "I do care for and about you, but I really love Nick," I softly inform him.
He takes a deep breath, slowly looking up to allow his eyes to meet mine and he shrugs. "I'm a fucking idiot," he scolds himself.
I force my lips to form a soft line and shrug, not daring to argue. "Josh, I think you're scared of showing any true emotion for any girl inside the circle of trust cuz you're scared of destroying what you have with her and hurting yourself," I suggest.
He chuckles softly. "Chris says the same thing all the time."
"Figures," I comment, shaking my head and roll my eyes as I sit back.

A few minutes of silence pass between us, our breathing being the only noise made by either of us. "Why do you tell Justin and Lance more?"
"They don't treat me like their arch nemesis."


I get back to the hotel we're staying at and smile as I watch Nick sleep, sprawled across the bed face down. I crawl over him and nudge his arm, he curls it to his body instinctively with a groan. I set the alarm for 6:15pm, giving us barely over an hour to catch a nap together and settle in beside him.
COCKADOODLE DOO! COCKADOODLE DO! COCKADOODLE DOO!
I hate the rooster sound so fucking much! But it's why Nick and I agreed on it for an alarm for tour, although it's digital. "Ugh!" he grunts, reaching over me and wraps himself around my body again.
I open my eyes and blink a few times. "You and the Boys have an interview before the show," I remind him, a growl greeting me for a response.

August 22, 1998
Howie's birthday, he's 25 now. We're in Toronto, Ontario, Canada and they have 2 shows. They perform at 2:30 & again at 8p, Nick's gonna wanna sleep for a long ass time and as long as he appeases Fatima, he can sleep until the next performance or rehearsal. It won't be nearly enough, the next one is tomorrow and then the 25th if you don't count interviews. It's 7am and I'm up, laying in bed. Yes, I'm curled to his body and I would love to get up soon, but Nick won't let me go. "Nick, I have to pee." He releases me and I not only go to the bathroom, but also creep back into the room to grab clothes before getting in the shower.
I'm leaning against the wall, letting the cool water hit my sunburned back as I let the conditioner soak into my hair. "What happened to just going pee?" he teases.
"I need a shower and my sunburn I forgot I had hurts."
"Okay. Is there any hot water left, baby?"
I smile to myself. "Should be, it's kinda cool water I'm using for the burn." I turn it up a little and rinse out the conditioner when he gets in.
"Morning, Cassie."
"Morning, Ocean." I felt like calling him Ocean.
"How is that burn healing?" he asks me.
I turn toward him, showing him the sunburn on my back and look at him over my shoulder. "The rest isn't that bad cuz I've been using the coacoa butter on it and the front is starting to tan."
"Looks good back here," he tells me, running his fingers over it.
I face him and his lips crash into mine for a few moments, getting back under the water. I head into the bedroom and grab his clothes, putting them on the shelf. I lay on the bed in the air conditioned hotel room, falling asleep quickly and I know I've been exhausted.
I wake up to a familiar pair of lips and body on top of mine, gentle caresses pulling me from my deep slumber. "Mmm, Nick."
"Yeah, babe?"
"I love you."
"I love you more."

At the arena, I see Johnny coming out of an extra pre-show room and smirking. I don't like that look he has or that he's motioning something to Nick, hands covering my eyes in moments. "Stop it! I can't see!" I fearfully admit.
He puts his head beside mine, lips brushing the shell of my ear and chuckles. "I know that, baby. You'll be fine. You trust me, right?"
"Yes, I trust you. It's Johnny I don't."
"I planned this."
"And you didn't tell me?" I say with feigned surprise. He's very good at planning surprises and keeping secrets.
"It'd ruin the surprise," he reminds me, guiding the way to the whole thing and I hear a foot tapping on the other side of the door as his hands remain over my eyes.
"That foot tapping ruins it as well."
"I knew that would, but that's not the real surprise."

"It's been a few months, Tay," I force through my tears, hugging her tightly.
"Am I chopped liver?" Chris asks.
"Shut up, Old Man."
"Stop it, Chris," Tay tells him.
Aaron is on stage right now, Tay is a surprise for us both and Nick set it up all on his lonesome. Speaking of Nick, his hand touches my hip and gently pulls me to him in order to hold me. "Surprise, baby," he softly says.
I spin in his arms to face him, pressing my lips against his and my body follows. "Thanks, Nick," I coo, smiling with my arms flung around his neck.
"Anything to see you happy," he informs me, returning the grin.

"Nick, five minutes," Fatima warns him, essentially ending our moment and I recall that he's fairly renown at this point in time before sighing in defeat.
"Your fans call for your attention," I mutter.
"My baby will call for my attention when I get done until the next show."
"Or anything related to the work you do."
"I love you," he reminds me, pecking my lips and smiling. He slowly walks backwards and keeps hold of my right hand, kissing the back of it when we're arm's length away. I get that lovesick grin and he winks at me, exiting the room to go perform. I know I have 15 minutes to recover from this before Aaron comes in the room, he always showers after he performs.
I sit beside Chris and sigh happily. "You've been bitten by the bug," he comments. I look at him and try not to laugh at the funny face he just made at me, Tay already laughing.
Once I stop my laughter, I playfully shove him. "Tay and Aaron are smitten with each other as well," I inform him.
"I say she's too young to date."
"No," I giggle, "they like each other and Aaron doesn't want to let her go, that's why he's always calling her."
"Really now?" he asks, turning his black and white braided head toward her.
She blushes, quickly looking away from him and her hair falls to cover her face. "I really like him, too."
"They know they're too young to date, but keep in mind that I began seeing Alex when I was 12 or 13," I point out.
"When she shows how mature she is and mom and I agree she's of age and maturity, she can date him." Tay begins grinning like a goon. "But you have to remember not all boys are like Nick, so be careful."

"Tay's here? She's really here?" Aaron asks excitedly from across the room.
She smiles, nodding her head. "I can prove how 'real' we are, if you'd like," Chris offers Aaron.
"Try touring with him," I joke.
"Nah, I'd rather tour with Curly," he responds.
"Your loss."

The rest of Tay's summer, all of three days, was spent with Pookie and she was laughing, having a great time. I'm on my way to York, PA to see Pookie and have to fly back for the day before our show in Dallas, TX in 3 days, so I'm taking a 2 day vacation to see her. I'm also checking with my intel providers, the two A's on that tour and they tell me everything. I'm planning to spend some valuable time with her, some of which is to bond. It would figure that she'd call just after I finished checking in for my flight and the moment I hang up with Danielle. "Hey, Pook," I greet.
"Justin says you went MIA."
"Nope, just wanted to ride with the band to clear my head," I fib.
"Oh, okay. So how's your promo tour?"
"Crazy busy, too many interviews to count and the fans are nuts. You were right about them."
"Of course."
"How about the one you're controlling?"
"I want to kill AJ, Brian is funny, Kevin is the daddy, Howie immerses himself in music and is learning my job, Aaron is crazy hyper and Nick is just like Aaron and is great to me," she prattles off. "Dammit, I gotta go before Nick and AJ trap Aaron in the empty trashcan backstage. Talk later?" she hurriedly says, sounding like she's running to the emergency.
"Sure, talk later." I chuckle at the thought of Aaron being stuffed in a trashcan after I shut down my cell and hang up with her, shaking my head in disbelief. Nick is the older brother and AJ and Brian are usually willing accomplices in Nick's plots, but Brian draws a line when it comes to what he'd be involved in. AJ is in if he's annoyed with the victim or needs something to do, it just has to be funny to him. It's worse when I come out to see her, we all gang up on her and Aaron.
I get on the plane and fly to see her and the Boys and Aaron, surprising everyone. The flight is over before I know it and I'm meeting up with Gary. "Wassup, Gary?" I say, stepping beside him and smirking when he quickly turns to look at me.
"Oldman."
"Where to and is she awake?"
"No, she's taking a nap while the Boys and Aaron are in their pre-show interviews."
"Backstage?"
"Where else?"
"Good," I say evilly, rubbing my hands together and grinning because of the scheme that has come to my mind. The drive over is spent talking about how she's been and how smooth everything has been going.
"She has fought with him over some small thing, I think twice since you left last time."
"What about?"
"Hanging out with AJ and doing that 'shit' that he gets into."
I don't think he knows what it is or if he even wants to get involved in the matter. "What kind of 'shit'?" I press, curious.
"It's whatever AJ's been getting into when he goes to the club."
That's not a lot to go on, but we're at the arena they're supposed to play at tonight and I drop it as we get out. "I don't know a damn thing if anyone asks."
"Same here."

We walk in and I see AJ, sporting the same shades I've seen on him more and more since the group name got out there when they came back to the States. I might have an idea of what it could be and I pray I'm wrong. "Sup, Chris?"
He's hiding something. "Not too much," I reply, completing a handshake.
"Cool. Checking up on her?"
"Uhm, yeah."
"Why, Nick?!" I hear Pookie scream a few rooms down. "Really, why?"
"Follow the screaming, you'll find her screaming at Nick for hanging out with me late last night."
The sound of a body hitting a wall and a smashing glass object made the three of us run straight for the room, AJ leading the way. He tries the handle and it's locked, waving it away after he puts his ear to the door. "What?" I ask, short of breath.
"Trust me, you don't want to know."
"Prove it."
He leads us around the corner, putting it on speaker and dials Nick's cell number. "Unh-uh! Hello?" Nick answers the phone, softly growling after.
"You seen Cass?"
"We're-OH?-busy," he informs us.
"Okay, tell her to call Chris after you're all set."
"Mmm. I will." He hangs up and AJ smirks at me.

I pull my jaw back around the world and say what came to mind. "Were they fucking?"
AJ and Gary shake their heads. "You do know that she gave it up to Nick?"
"They have-" I stop midsentence, realizing what they were talking about, "Ohhhhhh!"
"Yeah, a ridiculous argument will start and she shoves him, he shoves her to a wall or something and they'll go at it like they're about to die."
"How often does it happen?"
"Too often and I'm starting to think that she starts it just for the sex," AJ comments.
"Are you doing anything to make him more aggressive than he has ever been?"

"Whooooooooohhhhhh," I moan.
He pulls his lips off my collarbone and looks at me. "AJ." His lips begin searing my neck a moment later and my back arches off the counter.
"MMM!"
He rolls and dips his hips against mine, driving me up a wall. I push back against him and he holds me in place, fucking me crazy. He pulls out, flips me over and slams into my velvet walls in moments. He lets out a guttral growl as he releases and buries himself in me to the hilt. He kisses between my shoulder blades and runs a hand down and back up my thigh, taking a deep breath. "He was looking for you."
"Why?"
"Said something about getting in touch with Chris," he tells me, pulling me to stand flush with him without pulling out and presses his lips to mine as I gush with my release when he slowly swivels his hips.
"Once I start breathing normally again," I breathlessly tell him.
He guides me skillfully to the couch across the room and I lean back on him, pulling off his shaft. I scoot to sit beside him, slowly gaining my breath and cognition back from the release that sent me spinning in the first place. We share a kiss and I get up, fixing my clothes. I brush my hair and grab my cell, calling my older cousin. "Hey, Pook."
"What's up, 'Lan?"
"Just wanted to say hi and you should go be sociable with Howie in the mush hall."
What serves as our cafe is what Chris calls a mush hall. "Why?" I leave the room anyway, Nick knowing where I'm going to be.
"He texted me that you and Nick need a a few minutes apart."
"Be there in a minute." Almost to where he said Howie is.
"How are things with you and Nick?"
He's a little too nosy. "They're good."
"Okay." I round the corner into the cafe and spot him sitting with Howie, hanging up my phone as I jam it into my pocket. "No warning again, I see," I joke with him, walking up to and hugging him.
"Yeah, well, Gary knew cuz I called him and planned it all that way."

Nick enters the room and slings his arms over my shoulders, his fingers brushing across my abdomen just an inch or two above my belly button. "Hey, Chris," he greets him, kissing my shoulder.
"Nick, can I borrow you for a few minutes?" Chris asks, getting to his feet and walking past me with Nick in tow.
"I'm sure it's nothing," Nick assures me, walking out of the room.
I point a thumb in the direction they went, looking at Howie and Kevin. "What in the hell?"
"He heard when I called Nick while you two were screwing," AJ informs everyone.
"And?" I question, turning on my heels to come eye to eye with him.
"He walked away after I answered some shit for him."

I walk far enough away from the mush hall, turning a corner before I begin questioning the 18 year old blonde. "Has anything changed since I last came to visit?"
He quickly looks at me, looking in front of us and thinking his answer through. "She has been extremely argumentative lately."
Hmmm. "What do you mean?"
"She starts arguments and most of them are, well, redundant."
"You tell her that?"
"I do and then she shoves me, but I restrain her."
"Okay," I draw out.
"She struggles against me and I pin her better, a little more forceful."
"Huh."
"Then she giggles at me, pushing against me and she starts riling me up."
"You give in to her demanding desires, don't you?"
"Well," he starts, rubbing the back of his neck as we turn the corner just before the mush hall, "yeah. She gets me going and by then she's ready to go, not leaving me the option of sayin no to her."
That's one hell of a confession, telling me who has more dominance in their relationship sexually at least and I roll my eyes. "I can't believe her. Have you ever shoved her or hit her?"
He winces at this. "I have shoved her and I swear it wasn't meant to hurt her, it was to give me time to leave the room. I shoved her onto the couch and stormed out on her." His hands are up in front of himself, calmly defending a possible attack.
I push his hands down to rest at his sides. "It's okay, she starts it and you admit it like you are, it's fine to defend yourself. I know how she can get."
He nods, his blues meeting my browns. "She's really gotten into this whole 'bite me, scratch me, pin me' thing and she pisses me off to get it the way she wants it."
"Rough."
"Extremely rough," he tells me, his eyes almost comically wide.

I chuckle at this because I had a notion that she might become aggresive somehow, but this way hadn't crossed my mind. They're head over heels when it comes to each other, inseperable at best and beyond content with being together. We look at each other and he laughs for a second, walking into the mush hall again together. "Bonding again, guys?" Pookie demands, an annoyed stance greeting us to match her sarcastic comment.
"Yeah," I fire back, playfully return her attitude. She stops when he envelops her, whispering something in her ear and her hand cups the side of his face. A smile graces her visage, her other hand falling onto his and her eyes revealing how love drunk she is when it comes to him.
"Nick," she coos, allowing her hips to sway with the movement of his body and his hands guide her.
"Cassie," he replies as softly as she had spoken his name. It's kind of sickening sometimes, but Justin and JC are naturally jealous of him and she's always on their brains. Justin writes letter after letter to her, never mailing them to her and JC jots down songs about her, JC claiming those songs could be about someone else. I know him far too well to fall for that, unable to believe that static. Justin on the other hand, he doesn't lie about it.

I pull the letters from Justin from my pocket and place them on the table beside her and Nick. "Read these," I request.
"What are they?" she inquires, picking up the nearly overflowing folder and shuffles through them how Johnny would papers concerning us which brings a smirk to my lips.
"Justin's letters to you."
"That he never sent," she states, having read my texts and e-mails concerning this matter.
"Just check 'em out."

I got to Dallas late last night and I'm being woken up by Justin, violently being shaken while he screams. "Chris, where are the letters for Cass?"
I groan and roll over, he repeats the process until I look at him as if I'm about to kill him. "She has them," I growl through clenched teeth, my sleep ruined for the day.
"What?!" he shouts, scared about her reading them.
"I told you I was taking them with me and you said whatever."
"I thought you meant the other folder!" he justifies.
"No, now leave me alone so I can get ready to go after 3 hours of sleep because we probably have shit to fucking do."

I can't believe he gave them to her and that she's reading them, laughing at them. I'm so nervous when my cell beeps that I jump high enough to nearly hit my head on the top of the bus, nausea creeping over me when I see it's her texting me. 'Justin, I've known you've felt this way, but I don't feel that way toward you. You are my friend and confidant, my teddy bear that makes me feel better after a bad day when Nick isn't with me. You'll always be my Ramenhead! <3'
I read it and smile, assured that I mean something important to her. JC pokes me and shows me his email from her last night, she must not have been able to sleep for one reason or another.
'Josh,
    As much as I tell you that ILY, I mean it as a good friend and nothing more and nothing less. You are a great person to be around-happy, loving and warm. You always have let me know that I mean so much to you, so now I return the open heart gesture and kind words. Joshua, I love who you are and that you're one of my best friends so that you can be corny and have heart to hearts with me when one of needs them, but you also have this double edged kitana you carry within your heart for me.
    No, I won't ever turn my back on you when you need me. Yes, I will keep what we talk about in confidence. You do mean so much to me, but I don't think we'd ever end up being romantically involved because of our history and just how we are when we hang out. I cherish our time together because it is sparse. 'We're going to eat! Yeah!' I have many memories with you and very few are negative.
    Do stay in touch and don't forget that friends from before this who are there just cuz they can and they love you, those are real friends and are good if you ever need grounding. I miss you.
    Tell Ramenhead, I miss him, too.
    For the two oldest dweebs-I guess I miss em. XD
    Pez, I need to talk to his bumpkin butt when I catch y'all again.
            Much love and prayers,
                ~Cassie AKA Pookie'

Format and all, JC let me forward it to myself and I just copied it into the story. She has called me Ramenhead since I let it start growing out a bit more since MMC went off air. She's really gotten me into some good music, but I like my music as diverse as I can be. Momma always smiles when she gets around Cassie or I'm in touch with her. She calls Cass a good girl, but doesn't know what we talk about and I've told them that I want to be Cassie's boyfriend. Britney even knows I'd drop her for Cassie in half a heartbeat without a regret or a moment's hesitation.
Last year Brent called her a cunt and she punched him, he hit her with an aluminum bat which caused her to kick his knee. She told me that he dropped to his knees on the ground so fast, he cried out in pain. I'm not saying anything except that I wouldn't dare to piss her off if I can prevent it, that or pray my feet can carry me faster than hers can make her move. I know she can defend herself, making her a great candidate for celebrity security. She's talking about getting into writing full songs, producing, engineering and modeling on top of managing acts like us and Aaron. She has the intelligence and skill to be able to juggle everything, nearly effortlessly, making her the biggest threat in the industry.

If there's one thing Justin and I know, it'd be that Cass isn't a huge name in the Hollywood game and that once she chases after everything, she would be the biggest name in this game of names. I know she's beautiful, her friends are just as breath-taking as she is and I feel nothing for them-they aren't her. She knows me better than I seem to know myself, calling my bluff every single time and I still think she and I should get together to see what would happen. It's not going to happen any time soon, she's far too wrapped up in Nick's menical grasp to even consider it and claims she loves him while I'm dealing with a slowly shattering heart. I still kick myself in the ass for hurting her how I had all those years ago.
It's now November 17, 1998 and almost Thanksgiving again. Time for family and friends, snow (depending on our location) and the second leg of the tour starts soon with Britney as an opener. Cass is supposed to come check out the rehearsals and from what I understand, Cass will spend from opening day till the week of Christmas with us on the road and that's nearly a month with her! Damn right I'm thrilled about spending a month between a huge sardine can on wheels and hotels with her day in and day out! I'm so psyched! Bonus? Opening night is TONIGHT! I'm up at 5:30 in the morning? What the fuck is wrong with me?!
Someone just had to text me as I try to fall back to sleep. I snag my phone from the bedside table and read it, discovering it had been Cass. 'Get up lazy ass. I should be there by 6:15a and we need to talk. Serious.'
I grimace, but hope it's tour related. I smell coffee and bacon, wondering who it could be before recalling that I had Lance crash here. "JC, are you getting up? Cass will be here in ten, fifteen minutes."
"I just got her text!"
"She sent a mass text to all 5 of us," he explains.
"You know what she wants to talk about?" I ask, getting a pair of basketball shorts on and heading downstairs.
"Not yet."
"Shit."
A knock alerts me that someone just arrived and I unwillingly pull myself to the front door, greeting a very sleepy trio of guys that I work with. We grumble our 'morning's to one another and all sit in the living room, not counting Joey who had slowly shuffled his half awake ass into the kitchen. He followed his nose. I grab my cordless and wait for her to call saying she's at the end of my street, having planned this out a month ago. A few minutes later she calls. "Morning, sunshine!" she greets me when she hears it pick up.
"Uuuuuhhhhh," I reply half asleep, looking at Justin and Chris passed out in my two moon chairs across the room from each other.
"Could you be so nice as to grant me access to your shit hole?" she teases.
"Maybe."
"Please, Josh?"
"I'm getting off my ass."
"Walking to the gate?"
"Yeah."
"Punching it in?"
"Yup."
Chris' old POS VW Rabbit whips through the gate, almost taking me out in the process and I see she had it redone since she's been back. "Sorry, didn't want crazed fans getting in," she explains as the gate closes and a couple cars of girls park outside it.
I look at them confused and groan. "Seriously? Who in their right fucking mind would be up at this time unless they have to work or go to school?" I ask her and she shrugs. I turn to the cars and motion for them to leave, growing agitated. "Go live your lives."
She follows me into my house and stops in the hall between the front door and kitchen, claps her hands three times before announcing that Lance has finished making breakfast. Justin and Chris hardly ever fly up out of bed for anything, not counting food. "First off, thanks for being here on time-asleep or otherwise. Lance, you e-mailed the schedule to everyone else this morning?"
"Yes, around 5:30 this morning," he confirms, setting plates with bacon, eggs, sausage, toast, pancakes and french toast in front of each of us.
"Thank you. I'm only on this tour until December 23. Am I clear?"
"Should we expect Nick to visit?" Chris asks.
"Only for 3 dates and I don't even know when."
"Good," Justin grumbles.
Her head snaps in his direction with a warning snarl on her face. "Watch it, I can put on on security lock down," she warns us all. "Here's the list of appearences that will be done over the course of this part of your tour." She hands a stack of papers to me and I take one, handing it to Chris after. It's all interviews, cameos, meet & greets, interviews and check in info. I hang my head because I see we have minimal free time. "It's promo circuit tour, deal with it."
"When do we have to be where tonight?" Joey asks.
"Orlando is tonight's show, but you need to be at the arena by 4 and then 6 other group appearences and one is a Yahoo chat just for Josh," she explains, all of us following along with the schedules in front of us.