Chapter 1

Tired and dragging after another overfilled day and evening, he was ushered through the five-star hotel.  His watch read 1:45 a.m.  Thankfully, security had brought him in through a side entrance and the mob of fans in the lobby had no idea that he or his band mates were even in the building.  For once, he was grateful for that.

The small entourage stood waiting for the service elevator.  JC Chasez brought one hand to his face and rubbed his tired eyes.  Sleep was the only thing on his mind. 

That was until the soft lull of a piano grabbed his attention and made his ears perk up just to hear more.  The song was only vaguely familiar at first.  With a curious glimpse he looked over at Mike, one of the lead members of their security team.  “Where’s that coming from?” 

The large man was too tired to answer with words.  He pointed to the entrance of a bar across the hall and towards the left.   Briefly he closed his eyes and listened to the peaceful sound of Stevie Wonders’ “Ribbon In The Sky” being strummed out perfectly on the piano.  Not giving it a second thought, he wandered towards the source in such a daze that it didn’t even register when Mike discreetly called for him to come back.

It was his curiosity that had led him to the door of the dim, smoky bar.  It was nearly empty, with not more than a dozen people scattered at different tables.  Leaning one shoulder against the frame of the narrow entrance, he studied her playing with such emotion.  Just from the half a minute he had been watching he could see that she was completely lost in her own little world as she played.  There was no nervousness, no discomfort – just an aura of music surrounding her.  

“JC.”  Mike tapped the young pop stars’ shoulder.  “Come on, man.   I’m exhausted.”

JC heard the man and contemplated ignoring him; instead he tried shooing him away with a wave of his hand.

The song ended and light applause filled the small room, light compared to what he was used to anyway.  He joined in, clapping loudly. 

“JC, come on.”  Mike urged him again.

This time JC did ignore him.  He watched attentively as the young woman thanked her audience and reached in to a fish-bowl-looking glass jar and pulled out a folded piece of paper. 

“JC.  We have to go.”  Mike’s voice grew stern as his irritation seeped through and he laid a hand on JC’s shoulder.

“Fine.”  JC brushed the bigger man’s hand away and turned to leave, but gave one look back as she began to play her next song.  He was caught off guard when her stare met his own and for a split second he felt some weird kind of connection with the complete stranger.  She turned away quickly and he did the same, finally giving in to the pleas of his security guard.

“What was that all about?” Mike asked as they rode up to the twenty-seventh floor. 

“I’m tired.  Cut me a little slack.”  He huffed and stared up at the mirrored ceiling, the image of the girl at the piano running through his mind.  There was nothing special about her.  She wasn’t stunningly beautiful and considering his girlfriend of nearly three years was waiting for him in his hotel room, he shouldn’t have been giving her a second thought.   But for some reason, he was.

Maybe it was the simple fact that he was bored with his relationship with Jessie.  True, she had been there when he needed support and she had loved him when he needed to be loved.  But lately it seemed he stayed with her only to avoid being single and the chaos it would inevitably bring.  In his position, if he were openly available, women would be throwing themselves at him left and right.  They did that already, only now he had an excuse.  He had Jessie.

Stepping into his oversized suite he emptied his pockets and tossed the contents down on to an oblong table that was close to the door.  He entered the bedroom to find her sound asleep and completely sprawled out in the center of the bed.  With a groan he sat down on the edge and slipped off his expensive dress shoes.  He had hoped she would acknowledge his arrival and scoot over to her own side of the bed, but her sleep didn’t seem to be disturbed one bit.  “Must be nice.”  He grumbled softly to himself as he stood up to slip out of his clothing.  He nudged her shoulder.  The gesture far from tender or caring, it was more of an annoyance than anything.  He only wanted his sleep and right now she was in his way.  “Jessie, scoot over.”  He spoke with aggravation.

Finally she stirred.  “Oh, sorry.”  She groaned and rolled in the opposite direction making room for him to lie down.  He crawled under the covers, absent of emotion, the way it had been for quite some time.  It seemed their love had been replaced by convenience and he had been too busy to care.  Tonight was no exception.

Amanda Ballard had recognized her famous admirer the night before and it had given her a strange case of the creeps.  Not because he had been watching her, but because she had found herself enjoying the attention.

Amanda had been playing the piano since she was old enough to reach the keys, but it wasn’t her life.  It was just a hobby.  Her life was managing this hotel for her father who was too busy to stay in one place for more than a few days at a time.  The hotel she ran was one of many, but this one held a special place in her heart.  It was the one that was filled with memories of her mother and a place she had vowed never to leave.

Running such an upscale hotel had brought her close to many celebrities, but Amanda was never one to feel star struck.  Not that she was sure she had felt that the night before, but she had definitely felt something.  Movie stars, musicians, supermodels – she had been around them all and had always avoided getting too personal.  Amanda had a job to do and she did it very well.

So the next morning when she found her fingers stumbling across the keyboard and checking guest registers, it surprised her.  “Oh, this is ridiculous.”  She sighed inwardly and rose from her chair, straightening the navy blue suit dress that fell just above her knees. 

It was time for the morning rounds.  A routine that wasn’t necessary, but one she carried out every day anyway.  

She glanced at her reflection in the mirrored elevator as she traveled down from her third floor office.  Her naturally curly hair had been somewhat kind to her this morning and wasn’t a poof of frizz as it normally behaved.  She was thankful for that.  The high priced stylists that worked in the hotels’ salon had been begging her for ages to let them have their way with her auburn colored locks, Amanda had never given in.  That just wasn’t her.  She had never been one to stay on top of the trends.  Amanda was old fashioned and - as her mother had always told her – a bit of an “old soul.”

The memory of her mother brought an instant grin to her face.  Such fond memories she had of the woman who had filled her life with so much joy, but there was also a wealth of sadness that lurked in the background because she was no longer around.

Stepping towards one of the high priced retail stores on the first floor, Amanda looked down at her delicate gold watch to notice it was only a quarter till nine and although the shop didn’t open for another fifteen minutes, there were half a dozen or more people inside.

Checking the etched glass and brass handled doors, she found they were unlocked and recognized that the stores’ manager was in attendance as she made her way inside.   Only a few of the overhead lights were turned on, but if someone was trying to go unnoticed, they weren’t doing a very good job.   Four large football-player looking men overshadowed three other men and one woman.  Two of the young men were familiar, one being unmistakably the man who had gazed in on her late the night before.  He hadn’t noticed her yet and if he did it would be doubtful that he would recognize her as the same woman who played the piano in the quaint, smoky bar the night before.

Amanda walked straight towards Marcy Walker and greeted her with a cheerful good morning.

“Hello Amanda.”  Marcy was a middle-aged woman who looked nearly ten years younger than she actually was.  She was the exact opposite of Amanda.  She did stay on top of the latest trends and fashions, but being the manager of an upscale clothing store, Amanda noted that trends were an essential part of Marcy’s job.

“Early morning shoppers?”  Amanda asked quietly, glancing sideways across the store.

“Early morning shoppers who have already marked up a $500 tab.”   Marcy answered just as quietly, only through a gritty smile.

One of the oversized security men walked towards the two women with a look of discomfort in his eyes and one expensive little black dress outstretched in his manly-sized arms.  “Miss?”   He called to Marcy.  “Do you have this in a size three?” 

“Let me check.”  Marcy answered promptly.  Amanda grinned at the man and leaned her rear against the counter top, folding her arms over her chest and gazing down past the expensive garments, realizing that the young man she had seen the night before was quietly arguing with the young blond who accompanied him and the other two gentlemen.

She tried not to eavesdrop, but it was nearly impossible.

“Just get it.”  His tone was filled with frustration.  Amanda could sense that a mile away. 

“Are you sure?”  The petite young woman sounded more insecure than anything. 

“Yes, I’m sure.”  Amanda watched as he handled the bill of his dark blue hat, pulling it even farther down on to his head, shadowing his eyes.  Stray hairs sprouted out from underneath the baseball cap with an unruliness that gave Amanda the impression not much had been done with them before that hat had been put on.   “You know I don’t care about the price.”  He continued.

Turning his attention away from the young woman, he looked up just in time to catch Amanda’s stare and for a brief second, his gaze stole the breath right out of her.  She could feel a warmth easing to her cheeks and turned her attention away quickly, thankful that Marcy had returned with that size three dress.

Why?  She couldn’t figure out why this stranger was affecting her in such an unusual way.  And not just any stranger, a highly publicized one.  Amanda had never been one to drool over the rich and famous – not that she had been drooling now, but even so, her curiosity was scaring her.

After a short farewell to Marcy, Amanda headed for the door in a hurry.   The space in the normally airy store seemed to be shrinking by the minute and she suddenly felt very desperate to get out of there.   But as she reached for the handle, a hand sprung out of nowhere and grabbed it before she had the chance.

“You’re the woman from the bar last night.”  That voice did more to her than his piercing eyes did.  It shot a shiver straight down her spine and right back up it again until all the fine hairs on her neck seemed to be standing on edge.

Slowly she turned around, “Excuse me?”  She asked politely, her heart nearly beating in her throat.

He gazed at her inquiringly, his head tilted just barely to one side.   His chin lifted slightly as he studied her face while staring down the bridge of his nose.  “You play beautifully.” 

“Thank you.”

“Will you be playing again tonight?” 

His chiseled jaw line was darkened with stubble and his eyes, although hidden by the shade of his hat, were hollowed and dark.  She wondered if the man in front of her had managed any sleep the night before, he certainly didn’t look like it.  In fact, he looked as if he hadn’t slept in days.

“Well?”  Amanda realized she had been blatantly staring without giving him an answer, but frankly, she was a little surprised by his inquisition.

“No, I don’t play there regularly.”  She finally responded.

“That’s too bad.”  He fidgeted with his hat again and for a split second she caught a dazzling glint of blue hiding under his heavy eye lids.

“Yes…well…um, if you’ll excuse me now.”  Realizing she was sounding like a baffling idiot, she stood up straight to gain her composure and reached behind her for the door handle, but when she didn’t find it she nearly lost her footing and stumbled right into something hard and overbearing – her father.

“Amanda.”  His voice played like a drum to her ears as the stern man caught her fall.

“Father.”  She grinned up at him sheepishly as he let her loose and once again Amanda tried to pull herself together.

“Doing business as usual, I see?”  Mr. Ballard remarked to his daughter.

“Yes, of course.”

Her attention was taken away from the surprise of her father’s arrival when the man that made her feel completely goofy and awkward, interrupted with confidence.   “It was nice meeting you, Amanda.”   He nodded his head in her father’s direction.  “Sir.”   He called him and looked back at Amanda.   “If you’ll excuse me now.  I’m holding up the rest of my group.”

Amanda stood quiet as he turned and walked away, completely indebted to him for not mentioning her piano playing the night before in her father’s presence.   It was a secret she kept from him and he would have been more than furious if he had found out.  In his eyes it was inappropriate for the Vice President of his prestigious hotel to be acting so frivolously in front of guests, but she disobeyed none the less because it was the one thing that made her feel completely alive and free. 

JC wandered back towards his friends and security, noticing the look of confusion stamped across Mike’s face.  He could hear everyone’s words before they were even spoken.  Yes, he had been acting a little strange over the past few days, but he had no justification for his actions – maybe he just felt strange.

Jessie stepped out of the dressing room wearing the skimpy silk dress Mike had fetched for her and, as usual, it fit her perfectly.  “Very nice.”  JC told her with a near smile.  “You ready?”

“Um, okay.”  She turned quickly on her bare feet and disappeared into the dressing room once more.  Casually JC glanced back at Amanda and her father while heading towards the front of the store to pay for the items he was purchasing.  She had seemed frigid and shy today.  Not at all what he would have expected after seeing her play so gracefully the night before.  In fact, he wouldn’t have even recognized it was her if it weren’t for that captivating stare.

“That’s Amanda Ballard and her father Jonathon Ballard.”   The blond woman behind the counter announced.

“Huh?”  JC asked, not realizing he had been so blatantly staring.

“Mr. Ballard owns this hotel and his daughter runs it while he is gone, which is ninety-nine percent of the time.”  Marcy continued.

“Oh.”

“I take it we’re purchasing the dress as well?”  Marcy asked with enthusiasm.

“Yes.”

She gave him his total and he involuntarily pulled out his wallet and handed her his credit card.

The sales manager took it with a smile, not hesitating to run it through the machine.  JC realized he was about as far away as the planet Venus at the moment and the woman could have double or even triple charged him and he would have never even noticed. 

Later that afternoon, Amanda stewed over her strange encounter with, with – oh, whatever his name was.  She didn’t even know.  He knew her name and she definitely recognized his face.  She knew his pop status.  He was one of those *NSYNC guys, but not the most popular one, not the one who dated Britney Spears.  Anyone who knew anything knew about that.

Those two had stayed in her hotel once before.  They had created a madhouse that weekend.  There were teenage girls everywhere and even some that weren’t so much in there teens.  Many of them were hysterical and out-of-control.  Amanda didn’t envy that sort of lifestyle one bit.  She wondered if the other one – the one who didn’t seem to get any sleep – had those problems, too.  She figured he probably did.

At least his girlfriend wasn’t another pop icon like he was.   She was a very attractive girl though.   Amanda assumed that the pretty blond had been his girlfriend, anyway.  He had been buying her a very expensive dress.  But whoever she was, he didn’t appear to be very pleased with her while they were shopping.  For some strange reason, he seemed to be more interested in Amanda.  Plain, conservative and not-so-appealing, Amanda.  She had no clue as to why.

“Kevin!”  She announced loudly to herself and then slumped back into her chair with discouragement.  “No, he’s with that other group, I think.”  She mumbled.  The fact that she didn’t know his name was driving her nuts.  “If only I had younger sisters…”

And then she remembered that she had the whole world right at her fingertips – the Internet.  It only took a second for her to open up her home page, which happened to be a search engine, and type in *NSYNC.  She had never imagined it would come up with over a thousand different sites.  Not being picky, she clicked on the first link and waited.

“That’s him.”  She commented softly to herself as she clicked on his picture.  “He looks a lot better there than he did this morning.”

She took in a deep sigh as she read his full name and bio.  “JC.  That’s it.   Okay, I feel much better now.”

“Amanda?  Who are you talking to?” 

Trying to hide her own surprise and barely not choking on her own breath, she gazed up at her father with wide eyes as she discreetly moved her mouse to click the tiny “x” on the top of her screen and close the window.  “Huh?” 

“I heard you mumbling.  Are you talking to yourself?”  He asked, pushing the door open completely and letting himself inside.

“I must have been, sorry.”  She smirked and then made a mental note to be sure the door was shut all the way from now on.

“Anyway, I’m going out for a bit but I’ll be back to catch up with you at dinner.  Seven o’clock?”

“Sounds good.”  She grinned, nervously tapping her long fingernails against her oak desk. 

“I’ll see you then.”  He turned swiftly and left.  Amanda breathed a deep sigh of relief. 

“Why do you let him treat you that way?”  Another surprise visitor, she glanced up at the door to find the head of security, Ronald Johnson.

“Ron, you scared me.”  She told him with an exasperated sigh.

“And you didn’t answer my question.”  He shot back.

“That’s silly.  Treat me what way?  He’s my boss.”

“He’s your father.”  Ron reminded.  As true as it was, Amanda and her father were far from close.  They had never been close, but when her mother had passed away two years before, they grew even more distant than before.

“Yes, but here we have a business relationship.”

Ron stepped forward and shut the door softly behind him.  He had been at the hotel for over ten years and sometimes Amanda felt as if he was more a family member than a person on the staff.  “That’s bull and you know it.”  The older man spoke quietly as he sat down in one of the tan chairs across from her desk.  “You don’t ever leave.  How could you have any other kind of relationship than the one you do here?”

Amanda sighed deeply.  He was right and she knew it, but that was just the way her life had turned out and it was nothing to be sorry about.  “Shouldn’t you be guarding someone?  Like our VIP guests or something?”  She asked.

“There gone until this afternoon.”  Ron informed nonchalantly.  “Marcy told me about your run-in with Mr. Chasez.”

“It was no big deal.”  Marcy remarked.  “He caught me playing the piano last night in the bar.”

“Playing the piano again?  You’re lucky your father didn’t drop in last night instead of this morning.” 

“Don’t remind me.”  She sighed, looking past his dark head and glancing at the picture of her and her mother on the wall.  It seemed so long ago. 

Taking in a deep sigh, JC glared at himself in the mirror.  He looked like crap.  It was a good thing this was only a magazine interview and not a photo shoot.   After all the times he got on his band mates for not getting enough sleep and here he was looking like a creature from Night of the Living Dead.

He braced himself, noticing Chris charging him from behind in the mirror.   His playful friend rammed into his back full-throttle, as if he were tackling for a pro football team.  “Uh.”  The air from his lungs escaped him as he was pushed to the floor.  “Chris.  Let.  Go.”  He spoke much more calmly than he had expected as the older man kept him locked in some strange wrestling hold.

“Not until you tell me what’s wrong.”  Chris insisted.

“Nothing’s wrong and if something was do you think this is the way to get me to talk?”  JC looked past Chris to see Joey and Justin now hovering above him. 

Justin bounced up and down, filled with way too much energy and chanting.   “Get ‘em C!  Get ‘em  C!”

“I’ll put five bucks on Chris.”  Joey wagered.

“I’ll take that bet.”  Justin nodded and glanced at the buoyant Italian beside him before shaking his hand to make it official.

“Alright.  Enough already.”  Digging down deep, using all of his inner strength, JC hoisted Chris off of him and pushed himself from the floor.

“Uh huh, my boy never lets me down.  I’ll take my five bucks now.” Justin held out his hand with a smirk waiting for Joey to pay up.

Joey gave Chris a disgruntled sigh while digging in his wallet.  “You’ll have to add it to my tab.  I don’t have anything smaller than a twenty.”

“So what else is new.”  Justin scoffed.

JC looked over at Chris with a bit of irritation, but the negative thoughts faded quickly as he realized Chris had moved his attention on to Lance, who was chatting – or flirting – with a cute blond intern across the room.  JC scratched the back of his head, waiting for Chris’ next attack. 

It was only a second or two later that the funny man began bouncing in Lance’s direction, calling his name out playfully.

“Hey man, what’s up with you lately?”  Justin asked with seriousness as he brushed a hand against JC’s shoulder.

“Nothing.  Just lack of sleep.”  JC glanced down at his own two feet, avoiding Justin’s inquiring stare.  In all truth, he wasn’t sure what was wrong, so how could possibly explain?

“Yeah, lack of sleep does make you grumpy.”  Justin sighed, glancing around the room before bringing his eyes back to JC.  “But I think there’s something else wrong.  You know where I am if you decide you want to talk.”

His younger friend didn’t linger long enough to wait for a response.   Instead he hopped over to Chris, Joey, Lance and the intern with enthusiasm. 

Justin had grown up a lot over the last year.  More than just grown up, he had settled down quite a bit.  And the musical talent that had blossomed out of him on their last album, well, it made JC incredibly proud, to say the least.  He wasn’t just the young, attractive heartthrob with a good voice anymore, he was a musician.  Not that he hadn’t been that all along, but now he was perceived that way.  The way he should be.  They way they all should be.

The feeling of accomplishment the group underwent from writing and producing more than two-thirds of their third album – fourth if you counted the Christmas LP – was overwhelming.  Finally they had reached beyond the stereotypes and had formed their own identity.

But the process had been exhausting and JC was about at wits end.  He realized that now.  He hadn’t realized it even a few days before, but now, standing in this boring room with a dozen different unfamiliar faces whizzing by him every other second and him fighting off this uncontrollable urge to just collapse onto the floor – well, that had made him realize.  Yes, it was definitely time for a break.

The tour was over.  Now it was just finishing up the video for their second single, along with promoting it – the part he hated.  The part they were working on at that very moment.  Well, as soon as the interview got under way, that is.

©2001 BrandyRae

Amanda wasn’t sure why at four o’clock in the afternoon she found herself wandering around the lobby just looking for things to do.  At least she wasn’t admitting to why.  Deep down she knew the reason.  She was hoping for another glimpse.  Or even better, another encounter.

And that was just plain silly.  What would a big celebrity ever want with her?  Absolutely nothing.  That’s what.   And why was she so fascinated with a man that was adored by a zillion girls and could have just about any woman in the whole entire world?  She didn’t know.  The only thing she did know was that she hadn’t stopped thinking about him once during the day.  Well, maybe a couple of times, but just for a minute or two.  

It was a fact that scared the living daylights out of her.  Amanda’s experience with men, well, you could say was just about non-existent.  You could count that one boyfriend she had her freshman year in college.  The one that was even geekier than she was and more interested in his computer than Amanda.  That whole ordeal made her upper lip curl with repulsion.  What had she ever seen in Simon Smith anyway?  And who would name their kid Simon Smith?  It sounded just a bit like Simon Says and if she remembered correctly, he had told her about numerous occasions where he had been teased ridiculously because of it.  His parents had formed him into the nerd that he was just by naming him Simon Smith.

Oh, and why was she thinking of that anyway? 

Luckily, a lobby-full of screaming girls woke her up in an instant.  She stepped up to the long, marbled-looking registration counter to see what the commotion was all about.  Even though, really, she knew.  It was one of them.   It had to be.  But would it be him?

Nope.  It was the funny one.  At least that’s what she had learned earlier in the day while surfing the web.  His name was Chris, he was the oldest and he was very goofy.  Although, he didn’t seem very goofy as he strolled through the lobby, stopping briefly to sign autographs as his gargantuan bodyguard stood closely by his side.  She could only imagine what a nuisance that would be, to have some person beside you every second of the day.  She’d hate to deal with that problem. 

Mr. Kirkpatrick did seem very kind to the adoring girls in the lobby, nevertheless.  He might not have been the silly, goofy person that the web site had made him out to be, but he definitely wasn’t rude.  Amanda would have to say he looked pretty tired, too.  Boy, if she was someone who cared about these guys, she’d be telling them to take some time off and get some rest.  They all looked awful!  Well, not really awful, just pooped.

Her elbows leaning into the cool counter top, her eyes drifted off in a daze, she didn’t even notice him.  Not even as he somehow managed his way up to the counter with his bodyguard and girls screaming his name left and right.  Even then she didn’t realize.  It wasn’t until the clank of his key dropped onto the hard surface in front of her that she was startled into the realization of him being barely inches away – and looking straight at her.

With a deep gasp, her eyes must have opened as wide as golf balls as she practically jumped right out of her skin. 

A thin smile eased across his lips as he peered at her from underneath the brim of that same blue baseball cap.  “I didn’t mean to startle you, Ms. Ballard.”  He remarked.  “But my key doesn’t seem to be working and I was told you were the person in charge around here.”

“Yes, right.  Let me fix that for you.”  Amanda sputtered as she slid the key from the counter.  She wasn’t sure why she was so nervous.  Why did he make her feel that way?  She had never been nervous like that around anyone and she was acting like a complete idiot.

With shaky hands, she grabbed a new key from a pile under the counter and pulled Mr. Chasez’s room number up on the computer – mentally noting that he was in one of the nicer suites in the hotel – before sliding the new key into the little electronic box that would program it for his room.  It was a new system they were using and it gave her trouble often.  She was thankful at least it seemed to be cooperating now, since her mind and her voice certainly weren’t. 

Casually she took in the scene in front of her as she held the key in its slot, half-listening for the beep that would tell her it was ready.  The burly body guard stood facing the opposite direction, watching the pop star’s back and continually turning away fans while Mr. Chasez leaned on the counter, waiting.

“I’m very sorry about that.”  Amanda finally regained the normality to her speech as she handed him his new key.  “Please let me know if there is anything else I – we can do for you during your stay.”   Well, she thought she had pulled herself together, until she let that little slip out.  It took every ounce of energy in her body to fight off the embarrassment she felt for that one.

But it seemed to amuse him, as he grinned for a second time and gave her the most devilish look.  A look that made her insides tumble and flip all over the place.  “I’ll keep that in mind.”  He remarked.  “Thank you.”  If Amanda would have known anything about the male species, she would have chalked that one up as flirting, but she didn’t so she figured it was just her imagination.  It had to be.

Five seconds later he was out of sight and amidst the sea of fans that were waiting for him.  But Amanda couldn’t shake the imprint of those eyes from her head.  She would bet money that when he wasn’t so tired looking, he could just about knock a girl right off her feet with those eyes.  He just about did that to her already.

“You like that girl.”  JC heard his bodyguard’s comment as they rode alone in the elevator up to his room, but he chose to pretend that he didn’t. 

“Huh?”  He asked, shaking his head as if he had been lost in thought. 

“You heard me.”  Mike retorted.   “She is cute in a weird sort of way.”

“What?  Who?” 

“The hotel girl.  You know who.” 

Mike had been working with JC for a long time, and even though JC tried to play dumb, he knew Mike was no dummy.  But even so, he figured to fake idiocy was definitely his best bet with this one.  “The girl at the desk?”

“Uh,” Mike sighed and shook his head disbelievingly.  “The girl at the desk, the girl in the store this morning, the girl playing the piano last night – that girl.”

JC smirked and turned his attention to the elevator doors that would be opening any second.  “You’re crazy.”  He brushed off the conversation as easy as that.  Even if he did have some weird interest in that girl, it made no sense to dwell on it.  He was involved, he would be leaving soon, and he was in no position to develop new relationships with much of anyone.  Especially shy, timid girls who ran hotels for their rich father.   Although – really – he didn’t see Amanda that way, but technically that’s what she was.

Mike left JC at his hotel room door after making the announcement, or rather the reminder, that he had only one hour to relax and freshen up before leaving for the video shoot.  Excited as he was to film their new video, just the thought of that made him more tired. 

He was more than thankful that his room was completely empty.  In other words, Jessie wasn’t anywhere to be seen.   He figured she was off in the salon or shopping with one of the other girls on the trip.  Not such a big surprise.  Without bothering to take off his sneakers, he laid down on the bed and closed his eyes, knowing that he would be sorry when it was time to wake up, but also that he had to take the opportunity while he had the chance.

It didn’t feel like much time had passed when a strange commotion in JC’s suite disturbed his sleep.  He assumed it was Jessie returning with her shopping bags and buried his head defiantly underneath the pillow.  It was when he heard Mike and Justin's voices that he sprung up with newfound alertness. 

“JC.  Get up.  We’re late.”  There was no mistaking that tone, that hurry-your-ass-is-late-again tone.

“What time –“ His own thoughts interrupted him as he realized that it wasn’t only Justin and Mike in his room.  There was an older gentleman who looked to be hotel security, and – of all people – Ms. Ballard? “What’s she doing here?”  His words didn’t come out at all the way he had wanted.  He was surprised, but never meant to sound rude or mean.

He’d wished he could take that foot right back out of his mouth as her eyes dropped to the floor.  “Looks like everything’s okay here.  So, Ron and I will be leaving.”  She remarked, her eyes avoiding him completely.  Oh, he felt like a complete ass for speaking that way.  She had just caught him off guard, that’s all.

“Someone had to let us in, JC.” Justin remarked.  “Now get up, we’re late.”

He stood from the bed and stretched, watching as Amanda and the security guard exited his room.  “How late am I?”  JC asked curiously.

“We were supposed to be there 30 minutes ago.”  Mike answered. 

“Why didn’t you call me?”  JC asked, scratching the back of his head while vaguely remembering that the phone might have rang while he was sleeping, but he had ignored it or imagined it was the alarm clock or something.

“We did.”

“Oops, sorry.  I’ll be ready in a minute.”  The two other men left him alone and JC immediately went into the bathroom to splash cold water on his face and make himself more presentable.

All the while, he felt a twinge of guilt for the way he had acted.  He had hurt her feelings.  His tone had hurt her feelings.  He hadn’t meant to.  He barely knew the girl, but he never purposely tried to hurt her, or anyone for that matter.  Sometimes he had a tendency to be a little grouchy, he knew that.   Anyone that knew him knew that – but Amanda Ballard didn’t know him at all, so how would she know? 

Of course, there really was no reason, whatsoever, why he should care about her feelings or what she thought.  But for some odd reason, he did.

“Amanda, you’re shaking.”  Ron hadn’t spoken one word on their ride down in the elevator, and she wasn’t sure why he was following her to her office, but there he was and after five minutes of silence, he finally made a comment.

“Shaking?  No, I’m not.”   She argued, looking down at her hands and realizing that they were trembling a bit.  “Okay, maybe just a little.”

“Don’t let that guy bother you, Amanda.  You know how those big celebrities are.  He was just mad because someone woke him up from his nap.  It’s not our fault he overslept and wouldn’t answer the phone.”  Amanda only half listened as Ron rambled on.  Yes, he was right.   It wasn’t her fault that JC had been sleeping and was a little upset when his friends woke him up.  And it was his friends that woke him up.  She had only let them inside the room.  Sure, she followed them in and that probably wasn’t necessary, but her curiosity had gotten the best of her.  His friends were a little worried, so there could have been a need for her to be there.  What if some strange accident had happened and he needed medical attention?  She did run this hotel, after all, and whatever happened inside of it was her business.  There was no need for her to try and justify her reasoning for stepping inside his suite.

But here she was trying to make sense of it all. 

The memory alone of him sprawled out on top of the bed, sleeping so deeply with his arms tucked underneath him and his head buried into the pillow – it replayed in her mind over and over again like a video tape stuck on loop.   And that wasn’t normal.  It wasn’t sensible.  It wasn’t practical.  It wasn’t a zillion different things, which was exactly why she had doubted her motives.   Deep down in that scattered brain of hers, she was extremely curious as to what she would find on the other side of that door and that is why she followed his two friends inside.  She had only used her job title as an excuse. 

Her father would kill her for such irresponsible actions – or feelings.

Speaking of, she had little over an hour before their dinner reservations.  She was looking forward to that about as much as she wanted a hole in the head – as in, not at all.  

She realized, as she unlocked her office door, that Ron was still standing and waiting for her to make it safely inside.  “I think I can make it from here.”  She told him quietly.

“Oh, of course.”  He took a step back and looked at her softly with his caring brown eyes.  “You know how to get me if you need me.”

“Thank you, but I doubt that’ll be necessary.”

He grinned and flashed a salute as if she were a high-ranking military officer before turning on his heels and going back the direction they had come.  

Amanda stepped inside the serenity of her neatly kept office, locked the door and fell against the wall behind her.  This silly fascination with Mr. JC Chasez had to stop and it had to stop at that very moment.  She took in a deep breath and headed to her desk to finish out her work for the day. 

Of course, as she sat, she could not concentrate on a single thing.  This was ridiculous.  It was absurd.   It was crazy!  Sheer torture also came to mind because that’s what she was doing to herself.  What was her fascination with this man?  “God Amanda, you do need to get a life.”  She sighed inwardly to herself as she slumped over the top of her desk.  “Maybe then you wouldn’t fixate on everyone else’s.”

The hour that spanned before dinner sped by incredibly too fast.  After Amanda drug herself from her office and up to her condo on the eighteenth floor, she made minimal efforts to dress-up for the not so enjoyable occasion she would soon be forced to suffer through.  Dinner with Dad would be all business talk and nothing else.  He would want figures and numbers, the run-down on every different area of the hotel and whether or not any big events were coming soon.  All of this information would come along with her, carried in a leather briefcase.  It was way too much for her to recite off the top of her head, especially after the day she was having.

Pausing for a moment, she gave her reflection the once-over for the last time as she brushed by a tall mirror in her living room.  Her hair had turned into a frazzled mess.  She had tried to comb it back and secure it neatly into a ponytail, but even then there were strays poking out where they didn’t belong.  She had made the effort to apply a little make-up, hoping to liven up the color of her pale skin, and it had helped, but just barely.  Really, at this point, she didn’t care too much.  She only wanted to get the so-called dinner over with and return to the comfort of her condo where she could sleep her troubles away.  That sounded like just what she needed.

Amanda had finished half of her business spiel and barely taken the first bite of her baked chicken when her father received a “very important phone call” and had to excuse himself from the table.  She watched as he strutted away down the dimly lit aisle and breathed an excessive sigh once his tall figure was completely out of sight. 

It was then she realized that seated only a table or two over was the pretty blond girl who had accompanied her newfound person of interest earlier in the day.  It was his girlfriend.  She sat stiffly at a table with two other women, wearing a pair of black slacks and a not-so-dressy white tailored shirt.  She was definitely a pretty girl.  Her full blond hair hung in various layers touching past her shoulders and seemed very well kept.   Obviously, this girl had hair that actually knew how to behave.  If there was anything Amanda was envious about, that was it.  Oh, and maybe that she with him.  Not that she would admit that to anyone but herself.

Amanda wondered why she wasn’t wherever he was.  It seemed kind of strange that she would be at the hotel, but not be with him.  But who knew?  Maybe he was at some private meeting that was business only?  Maybe they had gotten into a fight?  Maybe she wasn’t his girlfriend at all? 

Oh, now she knew she was reaching.  Why would he buy such an expensive dress for the girl if she wasn’t his girlfriend? 

Frustrated with herself for letting her mind wander once again, she stared down at her plate and tried focusing in on her food.  Unfortunately, thanks to the circumstances, she didn’t find herself all that hungry.  What she did find, is that she could just barely hear the conversation of the three woman that sat two tables over. Or maybe it was just that key word that struck her, “JC.”

Her eyes still focused on her plate and her fork hanging loosely in one hand, she tried hard to listen in, but the elderly woman in the booth behind her fell into a coughing fit and made it completely impossible to hear a word.  Amanda knew she shouldn’t have been trying to eavesdrop anyway, but it was way too tempting.  Everything about him was way too tempting.  That’s what scared her.

Even after she had overstepped her grounds earlier and barged into his hotel room – which he had obviously not been happy with – he still tempted her in the most confusing ways.  The fact of the matter was, she did not know the man at all and probably never would.  So, why was she dwelling on him?  For the twentieth time that evening, she told herself that this silly nonsense had to stop – now.

His eyes barely open, JC sat in the back of the SUV thankful that they were finished shooting for the day – or rather, night – and he would finally be able to get some of that much needed sleep.  “Please, tell me one more time, we have nothing scheduled until tomorrow night, right?”  He asked.

“That’s tonight, actually.”  Lance answered from the seat in front of him.

“Whatever, tonight.”  JC corrected.  “It’s not the next day until you actually get to sleep, I don’t care what the clock says.  I won’t think of it as tomorrow until I wake up.”

As they made way through the lobby of the hotel, there were only a few fans that had waited up at such a late hour.  It would be daylight soon and JC was desperate to get to sleep before the sun came up, but he stopped to sign a few autographs anyhow.  He was truly grateful for his fans.  A fact that would never change no matter how tired he was.

After ten minutes or so, they moved onto the elevators where JC, Mike, Joey and one other bodyguard, Rick, boarded.  “So, I wonder if you missed your girl playing the piano tonight?”   Joey asked with a playful grin.

JC looked at his friend beside him with a bit of confusion stamped across his face.  “She’s not my girl.  And how do you know about that?”

But when he glanced over at Mike, he knew.  His bodyguard had spilled, it was written all over his face.

“You know we all know everything.  Besides, I don’t know what the big deal is anyway.  So you’ve got some crush on the hotel manager, big deal.”

“She’s not the manager.  Her dad owns it.”

“Oh, really?”  Joey asked in a high-pitched tone.  “So you’ve been doing your homework?”

“Oh, give it up.  I’m with Jessie.”  JC snapped with a roll of his heavy eyes.

“Right, just like you were with Jessie when you had that little thing with that Spanish girl last spring.” 

JC huffed and stood defensively as he turned to glare at his friend.  “I thought we buried that whole issue.”  But he could see that Joey was enjoying this way too much.  How come HE didn’t look so tired?  How come after such an exhausting day, the man could still have a sense of humor?  Joey was always in a good mood – always.  JC was grumpy and tired and mad because his friend had brought up the one time he had cheated on his girl, but still he couldn’t stay mad.

“We did.”  Joey smirked.  “Sorry.   Won’t happen again.”

He had known back then, when he had had his little fling with Sophia, that his relationship with Jessie was over.  But still he kept her around.  She even knew about Sophia and she still stayed.  In fact, deep down there was a big part of him that hoped it would give her a reason to leave, but she forgave him and said they would work it out.  Well, if this is what you called working it out, they were in big trouble.

Effortlessly he unlocked his room door and stepped into his suite.   What he didn’t expect was for the lights to be on and Jessie’s bags to be packed.  “Um, Jess?  You going some where?”  He called out for her and she appeared from the bathroom dressed in a pair of jeans and a sweatshirt.

“Yeah, it’s silly for me to be here.  You’re so busy.  I’ll see you when you get home.”  She told him as she zipped up her last suitcase and moved to lift it from the rack.

“I’ll get that.”  JC insisted and picked it up for her. 

“Really, I can do this myself.  I know you’re tired.”  She told him. 

“It’s okay.  I don’t mind.”  He assured her.   “When are you leaving?”

“In about a half hour.  You don’t mind, do you?”

“No.  You’re right, I am busy and I don’t really have any time for us right now.  It’s probably best if you go. I’ll see you soon.”

Inhaling deeply, she stared down at the floor.  “Yeah, that’s what I thought, too.  You get your sleep and I’ll be really quiet with the rest of my stuff.  I’m just about ready.”

©2001 BrandyRae

 Chapter 3

It was amazing what a good nights sleep would do.  Well, technically he hadn’t hardly slept during the night, but whatever you called it, he felt much more alive when he woke up at three in the afternoon.  He groaned and stretched his body under the sheets of the bed, happy that he had three more hours until it was time to leave for the shoot.

But, of course, he was starving so he would have to get up.   Or, he could always call room service.   Nah, he felt ten hundred times better than he did the day before so he’d make an appearance in the lobby and sign some autographs, then head to the hotel restaurant for a late lunch/early dinner. 

On the other hand, the bed was mighty comfortable and he had it all to himself.  Maybe that’s why he had slept so good.  Funny, it used to be the other way around.  He used to sleep better when she was there.  Not anymore.   If that wasn’t a tell tale sign than he didn’t know what was.

Finally he decided to get up and take a shower.  He stopped briefly to look at himself in the bathroom mirror on his way, thankful that the bags had finally disappeared from under his eyes.  Today would be a much better day, he could feel it already.

His good mood didn’t subside as he shaved after his shower and towel dried his shaggy brown hair, knowing it would definitely be another hat day.   Besides, the stylist would be doing his hair when he got to the shoot so there was no need to make an effort now.  He threw on a pair of long cargo shorts and a t-shirt, covering his head with a fisherman-style hat before slipping on a pair of flip flops. 

Ready to go, he picked up his cell phone and called Mike.  “I’m hungry.  Can you come get me?”  He asked his bodyguard over the phone.

“Give me ten minutes, I’m downstairs.”  The man answered and hung up without another word. 

“Ten minutes.”  JC repeated to himself as he slipped the tiny phone into his pocket.  “Wonder what everyone else is doing?” 

He didn’t have to wonder for long as he heard a loud knock on his room door and answered it to find a bright-eyed and cheery Chris standing in the hallway.  “Hey.”  

“Hey, you’re awake?  Wow.”  Chris remarked with sarcasm as he pushed his way through the door.

“Yeah, I was just gonna go get some food.  Wanna come?”  JC asked, following Chris inside.

“Sure.  What happened with Jessie?”  He asked curiously as he plopped down on a couch in the main room.

“She left.  She was bored, I think.”  JC explained, taking a seat across from Chris in an empty chair.

“Oh.  Bored, huh?   Maybe she was just tired of being ignored.”

“Don’t start.”

“Hey, I just don’t understand why you two don’t break things off.  Why do you keep her around when you don’t even do things together anymore.”

This was not the conversation he wanted to have at the moment.   His day had started off really good, he didn’t want to spend the rest of it trying to figure out what to do about his relationship with Jessie.  “Can we not talk about this right now?  I’m in a pretty good mood and I don’t want to ruin it.”  He told his friend.

“Oh, okay.  Yeah, whatever.”  Chris replied.   “Sorry, I don’t want to ruin your good mood.”

JC rolled his eyes and stood up as he realized Mike was knocking at the door.  He answered it to find the body guard waiting patiently with his arms folded over his chest.  “Ready?” 

“Yeah, Chris is coming, too.”  JC informed.

“Oh, maybe we should call Jim then.”  Mike suggested.

“Ah, what’s a matter Mikey?  You can’t handle the both us?”  Chris smirked, brushing past the man and patting his hefty shoulder.

“Pshh, right.  Come on, let’s go.”  Mike huffed.

JC had half hoped that when they got down to the lobby area he would see Ms. Ballard behind the registration desk again today, but she wasn’t there.  He realized that she was probably busy off doing hotel stuff, whatever it is people that run hotels do.  

He wanted to apologize for the way he had acted the day before, but she had really caught him off guard standing in his hotel room.  That was the last person he had expected to be there, even though now, as he re-thought the whole situation, it did make perfect sense.  She was the person in charge, after all, and he had ignored the phone and the door.  Something could have happened to him.  Not likely, but possible.  Some psycho, deranged fan could have been waiting for him and attacked him, leaving him for dead on his hotel room floor.  Now that was a crazy thought.  He was letting his imagination get away with him.

Chris and JC signed autographs for a good twenty minutes in the lobby before finally making way to one of the five restaurants in the hotel.  This one, JC noted, was very close to that little bar where he had heard her playing the piano two nights before.  In fact, there was a door that adjoined the two and he could sort of see through it from his seat.  Of course, there was no one in there now.  He wasn’t sure if the place was even open at three thirty in the afternoon.

The three men ordered their food and talked a whole lot about nothing, but JC kept finding himself gazing over at that doorway, the memory of her music lingering in his mind.  But what he had never expected was to catch a glimpse of her walk right past it, along with some man, carrying a clipboard in her arms.  Now was his chance and he had to take it.

Without a word he scooted his chair from the table and rose to his feet.  “JC, where are you going?”  Mike asked.

“I’ll be right back.  I’m just going over there for a second.”  He answered without looking back.  He was focused on the door.  He had to get to that bar before she left. 

The lights were off except for a few behind the bar counter that spanned along the back side of the room.  Mirrors lined the wall behind it with every possible type of alcohol you could imagine lined perfectly on high shelves above.  That’s where he found Amanda and the other man, apparently going over inventory or something.  The older man was reading off names of alcohol and she seemed to be checking them off on some sort of list.

He stood there very quiet for a moment as she had yet to realize he was there.  The girl was spacey.  She had done the same thing yesterday when he surprised her at the registration counter.  It was rare that he could walk right up to a girl and she not even notice he was there, not since the group had gotten so big, anyway.

She seemed a little more put together today.  Her reddish-brown hair was full of waves and it fell just below her shoulders, one big piece stayed tucked behind her ear as she stared down at the papers attached to the clipboard.  Her clothing was all business, with a white button down shirt tucked into either a skirt or slacks, he couldn’t tell because she was behind the bar.  Either way, she had a pretty nice figure underneath.  That he could tell.  He was a man after all.

Finally he made his move and headed towards the bar.  JC was only a few steps away when Amanda and the other man both looked up and noticed him heading their direction.  He could read the look of surprise on her face immediately.  Her eyes were a pale green color and opened up about as wide as quarters.  It was a look that made him smile.  For some reason he enjoyed sneaking up on her.

“Mr. Chasez.”  She spoke very professionally, with a little bit of shock intermingled in her tone.

“Ms. Ballard.”  He replied confidently.  “Do you think you could spare a minute?”  He stepped up to the bar and took a seat on one of the round, black stools, leaning his elbows on the cool, lacquered surface.

“Of course.”  She answered.

“I’ll go start on the stuff in the back.”  The other man remarked, grabbing the clipboard from her hands and heading towards a door to the side of the bar.

“What can I do for you?”  She asked, re-tucking that thick grouping of hair behind her ear.

“I just wanted to apologize for yesterday.  I didn’t mean to come across so rude.  I was just a little surprised, that’s all.”

“Oh, there’s no need to apologize.”  She spoke nervously.  He knew he made her nervous.  It was so obvious there was no way she could possibly hide it.  He had a tendency to do that to young girls, but not usually to ones his own age or older.  He wasn’t quite sure how old Amanda Ballard was, but he guessed she was probably a little bit older than him.  “I shouldn’t have intruded that way.  Your friends seemed a little worried and so I wanted to make sure there was no need for-“

“Please.”  He interrupted.   “There’s really no need to explain.  I understand you were just doing your job.”

She stared at him briefly with those pale green eyes, apparently without a response to his interjection, before letting her gaze flutter away from him, drifting off into the empty space behind him.

“So, do you ever leave this place?”  He asked.

Her brow wrinkled into the center of her forehead.  Almost as if she had to think about her answer.  “Of course.”  She finally spoke.

JC grinned, she looked a little flustered and that amused him fully.  He wasn’t sure why, but it did. 

“Why do you ask that?”  She continued.

“Just wondering.”  He remarked.  “Well, I don’t want to keep you away from your work and my food is probably getting cold.”   He stood from his stool and lifted his hat just enough to scratch the back of his head.  “I’d say that maybe I’d see you around, but I’m leaving in a couple hours and you’ll be gone by the time I get back.  Maybe I’ll see you tomorrow.”

She looked at him with complete and utter confusion.  “Sure.” 

“Maybe we could have lunch?  Or are you off tomorrow?”  He wasn’t even sure where that had all come from.  Was he asking her on a date because he hadn’t even realized those words had come from his mouth until it was already too late.

And she still looked totally confused.  “Day off?  Um, I don’t get those.  I’ll be here.”

“What do you mean you don’t get a day off?  Everyone has to have days off.  Even I get days off, well, sort of.”

“It’s not that I don’t get them, it’s just that I never take them.”  She explained.  

“Oh, well, that’s too bad.  Anyway, I should go eat now.” He took one step backwards, but his eyes didn’t leave her for a second.  “You do accept my apology, right?”

“Yes of course, Mr. Chasez.”  He hated that formality in her voice.

“Please, call me JC.”  He asked, taking another small step backwards.

“Of course, JC.”  She said it, but she still sounded all business-like.

“Alright, well, I’ll see ya tomorrow then.”  Finally he turned and left, feeling really strange about the whole scene that had just played out.  His friends were really going to give him a hard time for that one. 

Amanda stared at the doorway JC had just left through.  She was frozen with disbelief, shock, surprise, amazement, and about a hundred different other emotions that she had never felt before.  Had he just asked her out on a date?

He only wanted to have lunch.  Maybe he just felt really guilty for the way he had acted the day before.   That must have been it.  There was no way he really wanted to go on a real date with her.   This was just lunch.

But even so, she was still in shock.  She had been in shock the minute she saw him standing in front of her and it had yet to disappear.  He sure had a way of a sneaking up on her.  Never had she ran into the same celebrity so many times during their stay at her hotel.  She was beginning to think these occurrences were happening for a reason.

She breathed in deeply, trying her best to remember what exactly she had been doing before he had so surprisingly interrupted.  Her concentration was completely lost.  “Inventory.”  She whispered softly to herself.  “I was doing inventory with John.”

Just as she started to turn and meet John, the head bartender, she heard his voice again.  “Oh, Amanda?”  She looked up to see JC standing just barely in the doorway.  “It is okay if I call you Amanda, right?”  He asked.

She stared at him for a second, stricken with more surprise.   Why had it been so difficult for her to find her voice lately.  The guy practically knocked the speech right out of her.  Finally, she found it.  “Yes, of course.”  And how come she kept saying of course so much?  Every other word came out as of course. 

“Anyway, is two okay for lunch?  I know that’s kind of late, but we’ll be shooting a video all night so I’ll have to get some sleep sometime.”

Now she knew.  Now she knew why he had looked so tired the day before.  She had to admit, he looked much, much better today.  In fact, he looked pretty damn good, but she was trying really hard not to think about that.  “So you were serious?”  She asked.

“Yeah, I wouldn’t have asked if I wasn’t.  Are you busy tomorrow?”  He stepped a few feet into the room and about ten times closer to Amanda, or so it seemed, and she felt her pulse increase about twenty times.  She couldn’t understand why he had such a wild affect on her.

“No, I’m not busy.  I mean, I’ll be working, but that’s okay.  I’m always working.”

“Good.”  He grinned and it sent her heart into a flutter.  He had a beautiful smile.  She couldn’t help but realize how much more awake and cheerful he seemed today.  God, if she did go to lunch with this man she could really be getting herself into trouble.  What in the world was she thinking?  “Well, not good that you’re always working, although I can definitely relate to that.  Anyway, I’ll see you then.”

“Okay.” 

He turned to leave and then turned back around quickly.   “Wait.”  He said.  “How do I find you?”

“You can just pick up any of the hotel phones and ask the operator to page me.”  She told him.   “Or we could just meet in the restaurant.”

“That sounds good.  You pick since you know which one is best.” 

It was then the thought occurred to her that if she had lunch with him in the hotel it would be the gossip of the entire staff and surely get back to her father.  That might not be such a good idea.  “You know what, I just remembered I’m going to be in meetings all day tomorrow.”  She made up a quick excuse, hating herself with every word, but it really was for the better.

“Oh.  Oh, well that’s too bad.”  He remarked, a blank look spreading across his face. 

She hated to lie.  Oh, the guilt was welling up already.  She was a terrible liar.  She couldn’t do it.  She folded under pressure – the pressure of herself.  “No, that’s not true.”  She admitted.

He looked at her completely baffled, with one eyebrow raised slightly higher than the other.  “Oh.”

A little flustered, she shoved her hands in the pockets of her black slacks and stepped out from behind the bar.  “I really just, well, it would be unprofessional of me to-“  She really was at a loss for words because, honestly, it could be considered a business lunch and wouldn’t really be that unprofessional of her.   But it was more than that, at least for her, and everyone would know it.  Amanda was readable, that was one thing she knew about herself and the staff knew her well enough to know it too.  They’d all guess right away that she had a little crush on this member of the hottest so-called boy band in the entire universe.

“To have lunch with a guest?”  He asked.

“Yeah.”

“Oh, well in that case, maybe some other time when you’re not working.”  He flashed a tight lipped smile and she visibly noticed him take in a deep breath.  “Guess I’ll see ya around – maybe.”

Amanda just stood there incredibly mad at herself for turning down such a tempting offer.  Maybe?  Oh, that sounded so disappointing.

“It was nice meeting you, Amanda.”  He said.

“You too, JC.”  She had to force herself to call him by his first name because it still just didn’t feel right.  She never referred to guests by their first name, but he had specifically requested her to, so she did.

“See ya.”

“Bye.” 

He turned and left and she literally smacked herself on the forehead because she was so frustrated with herself for chickening out, because that’s what she had done.  She had completely, one hundred percent chickened out.  Oh, she was such a wimp!

JC returned to the restaurant and both Chris and Mike looked at him completely puzzled.  “What?”   He asked, scooting his chair up to the table.

“So, you do like her?”  Mike asked curiously.

“Who’s her?  Who’s her?”  Chris chimed in with excitement before taking a huge bite of his greasy hamburger.

“I asked her to have lunch with me tomorrow and she turned me down.”  JC admitted casually, inspecting his turkey sandwich to make sure it was the way he had ordered it.

“You got rejected?”  Chris asked, his mouth half full.

“Guess so.”  JC spoke nonchalantly, picking up a french fry and shoving it into his mouth.

“Why’d she say no?”  Mike asked.

“Something about being unprofessional for her to have lunch with a guest.”  He mumbled through a bite of his sandwich.

“Oh, that’s a bunch of crap.”  Chris remarked.  “I don’t believe that for a second.  She just doesn’t like you.  That’s all.   Wait, who is this girl, anyway?”

JC rolled his eyes and took another bite of his food.  He had to agree, he didn’t quite believe her excuse, but he didn’t think that it was because she didn’t like him, either.  In fact, he knew she liked him.  Why would she get so nervous around him if she didn’t?  It had to be something else.  Maybe she was afraid of what people would think?  He could understand that one.  He didn’t like it too much, but it was understandable.

Really, he didn’t know what he was thinking anyway.  He had a girlfriend – sort of.  He shouldn’t have asked Amanda to lunch in the first place.  “It doesn’t matter, anyway.”  JC remarked to his friends.  “I don’t know what I was thinking when I asked.  You know I don’t have time, I mean, I shouldn’t be going to lunch with strange girls.  It’ll only start more rumors.  Besides, I do have a girlfriend.  I don’t know what I was thinking.”

For once Chris stopped eating and gave JC the most serious look from the tops of his dark eyes.  “Are you trying to convince us – or yourself?”

That was a question in which he had no answer for.

An hour had passed since she had regretfully turned JC down on his invitation to lunch and Amanda had been kicking herself ever since.  Well, not literally, but she sure felt like it.  She had finished up inventory with John in a hurry so she could return to her office and wallow in her own self pity.  She was so mad she could have just about punched her own self in the face.

She glared at her phone as the intercom beeped.  The last thing she felt like doing was talking to people on the phone.  Actually, she didn’t feel like doing anything except for being mad at herself.  “Yes?”  She asked, punching the speaker button.

“Amanda, there’s a Josh on the line for you.”  Her secretary informed.

Josh?  She didn’t know any Josh.  “I don’t know a Josh.  Did you get a last name?”  She asked.

“He said you would know who he was.  He spoke with you earlier in the bar.” 

JC?  And then she remembered his bio.  He must have been using his real name so no one would be suspicious?  Or maybe because he was afraid the operator could be some crazy fan?  Who knew.  “Okay, thank you.”  She told her secretary and picked up the phone.  “Hello?”

“Amanda?  Sorry to bother you again.”

“JC?”  She asked.

“Oh, yeah.  Sorry, the J stands for Josh, anyway,  I didn’t want the operator to get any ideas.”

“Oh, no problem.” 

“So, I’m feeling kind of weird about earlier.  Do you think we could talk for a minute?  I’ve gotta leave in about an hour.  Maybe you could come up to my suite?  Or would that be unprofessional, too?  It’s just that it’s a lot harder for me to go places than it is for you.   I mean, not to sound selfish or anything, it’s just if I come to you then I’ll have to get my bodyguard and I’ll have to stop and talk to fans – not that I mind doing that – but it will take like a half an hour just for me to meet you somewhere.”

Amanda had to hold back a chuckle, because for the first time since she had spoken to him, he sounded like the one that was nervous.  She had no clue why, but if she wasn’t mistaken, he sounded just a little unsure.  She must have thrown him a curve when she turned him down for lunch.  “Sure, I can take a little break.  What room are you in again?”

“You don’t know?”  He asked her.  She couldn’t tell if he was joking or serious.

“Well, no.  I don’t have every guests room memorized.  I’m not that good, Mr. Chasez.”  That had slipped.  His name had slipped and she knew he’d call her on it.

“Please, call me JC.”  She knew it.

“Sorry.” 

“Anyway, I was just messin’ with you.  I’m in room 2707.” 

“Okay, give me about ten minutes.”  She told him.

“See ya then.” 

Amanda didn’t know what the heck she was doing as she rode up in the elevator to JC’s room.  And why on earth would he want her to come up to his room?  And where the heck was his girlfriend?  Up until that moment that little factoid of information had completely escaped her.   Maybe she wasn’t his girlfriend after all…

She stared at his room door for a full minute before she finally gained the courage to knock.  He was, after all, the one who had requested the meeting.  Not her.  She had no reason to be nervous.  But she was.   Just like always.  This man had really sent her world in to a tizzy ever since she had first seen him two nights before.  What was wrong with her?

He answered the door almost immediately and she realized, immediately, that this was a very bad idea because each time she saw him he seemed to grow more and more attractive.  And this time was definitely no exception.  For a change, she got a glimpse of him without a hat and she had to admit she liked what she saw.  His hair was pretty long and it had some definite curl to it.  She could only imagine being able to run her fingers through that hair.  Oh!   She shouldn’t even be letting those thoughts in her head.  Yes, he had some weird interest in her, but she was sure it was nothing like that.  He could have women ten billion times better looking than Amanda, that she was sure of.  Besides, when it came to experience, she had none.  Guys could sense that stuff so surely he wouldn’t be expecting some sort of fling or something crazy like that.  She hoped – or did she?  Her hormones were raging… Oh, but that was another story altogether.

“Come in.”  He grinned and opened the door wide enough for her to step inside.  “Did you notice any crazy girls hanging out in the halls on the way up?”

“No, not really.”  Amanda answered, feeling just a bit awkward and uncomfortable.  The room seemed different than it had the day before, although she couldn’t quite put her finger on it.  One thing she did notice was the distinct scent of man that lingered in the room.   It was a clean mix of soap and aftershave and it sent her nostrils into a frenzy of delight because it wasn’t very often that she smelled those sorts of things, especially from a man as attractive as the one in front of her.

“That’s good to know.  So, about earlier...”  He said, motioning for her to sit down on one of the sofas before he sat down across from her on the other.   “Just wanted to say sorry for overstepping my boundaries.  I really had no business asking you to lunch.  I don’t know what I was thinking.  My mind has been a little haywire lately.  I hope you weren’t offended by my invitation.”

Now she was really thrown for a loop.  Of course she wasn’t offended.

“I mean, now that I think about it, I understand completely what you were saying.  You being seen with me in your hotel, well, it would probably just start rumors for the both of us and I’m sure you don’t want that.  I know I don’t want that.  It really was a bad idea.”  He continued.

Amanda glanced around the room, realizing there was not one hint of woman anywhere.  Yesterday it had been obvious that he hadn’t been staying alone.  Today the room was half empty and that, she realized, was the thing that was different.  She was a little confused about his whole situation and who that girl had been, but she was in no way brave enough to ask.  “You don’t have to apologize, really.”  She assured him, beginning to feel a little rejected herself.  As if he was taking back the invitation.  Well – she guessed – technically, he was.

“You’re right.  You’re right.”  He repeated, resting his elbows on his knees and folding his hands together.  “You know, I just can’t stop thinking about you playing the piano that night.  How come you don’t play more often?”

Ah ha!  That was his weird fascination with her.  Amanda knew she played pretty good, but that good?  She had no clue she was good enough to spark the interest of a real musician.  She smirked and took a breath as her nerves calmed down just a notch or two.  “It’s really just a hobby.  My father would kill me if he knew I did that.  That would be very unprofessional.”

“Playing the piano?”  JC asked with surprise in his voice.

“Yes, in front of hotel guests.”

His eyes narrowed and he leaned forward towards her.  “Your father seems kinda bossy.  Not that it’s any of my business.”  He interjected quickly.  “I just don’t see why that would be such a big deal.  You playing the piano and all.”

“I think it’s because it reminds him of my mother.”   Oh, Amanda, you are getting in way over your head.  She couldn’t believe she had mentioned her mother.  She was not ready to tell this man that she had barely met her life story.

JC just kind of looked at her as if he wanted to ask, but she could tell that he didn’t want to pry.

Finally Amanda just gave in and told him. “She passed away three years ago.”

“I’m sorry to hear that.”  He said.  “I wasn’t trying to be nosey.  I just hate to see talent go to waste.”

“Yeah, well… my talent would be running this hotel.”  Amanda explained.

“That’s not a talent.  That’s a job.”  JC remarked with a smirk.  “I mean, not that you’re not good at your job.  I’m sure you very good at it.  But, well, you know what I mean.”  She watched as his face fell into his hands and he groaned as he rubbed his eyes.  He looked up at her and sighed.  “Forgive me.  I’m really not myself lately.”

“And why is that?”  She asked, hardly believing that she had asked because she promised herself not to get too personal.   Of course that was before she had blurted her mouth off about her mother.

“I need a vacation.”  He answered with no hesitation, stood up and stretched his arms towards the ceiling.  Amanda tried hard not to look, but she just couldn’t not look as his t-shirt lifted above the waist of his shorts just enough to give her a hint of his ivory colored skin.  He had been hiding a stomach that could have easily passed for a washboard.  If she guessed right, that wasn’t a six pack it was more like a twelve pack – if there was such a thing.

She reminded herself that her hormones were raging and even the chubby bell hop would probably look good to her right now.  Well… maybe not.

“Well,”   he said, rubbing a hand over his stomach – a hand that she grew a little jealous over because she’d love for it to be hers at that very moment.  “I don’t want to keep you from your work.  Thanks for coming by.”

Amanda stood up, still a little confused as to why he had asked her there in the first place.  She guessed because he wanted to straighten out the whole lunch idea thing.  But really, that hadn’t been necessary at all.  The only thing their little visit had accomplished was sending her hormones into overload.

She walked towards the door and he followed, but instead of reaching for the handle she hesitated and took in a deep breath – a breath consumed with his clean manly scent as she turned to face him behind her. “You know, this really wasn’t necessary.  I mean, I wasn’t offended or anything.  You didn’t have to explain to me.”  Really, she wasn’t sure what exactly she was trying to say.

He stared at her with those deep blue eyes.  Eyes that she could actually see now, eyes that were alive and awake and full of life, not like they had been the day before.  There was no hat to shadow them.  They were open and bright and looking right at her.  When he smiled his whole face lit up and when he looked at her that way, it made her feel things that she had never felt before.  “I know.”   He finally spoke.  “Honestly, I just wanted to see you again.”

His honesty left her speechless and confused.  The only thing she could think of to say was, “why?” 

He chuckled softly and his gaze dropped to the floor for a brief moment before he looked up at her once more.  “That’s kind of a strange question.  I don’t know why.  Just because.”

“Oh… okay.”  She was feeling very unsure and that nervous feeling had crept up again, ten fold.  “I should probably get going.”

“Right.   Well it was nice talking to ya.” 

“You too.”  She replied, her heart pounding so hard she’d swear it was getting ready to beat right out of her chest.   As he reached to open the door for her, his arm brushed against her shoulder and caused a zillion little tremors to travel from one end of her body to the other.  If accidental touches made her feel that way, she could only imagine what one purposely given would do.   She shunned the thought, hoping to divert the rosy ness she felt heading towards her cheeks.  Why was she feeling a little embarrassed?  She had no clue, but figured it had something to do with the fact that he had completely turned her on by just one little two second touch.  Lord, she was in trouble.

She stepped into the hall, took another breath of courage, smiled and waved goodbye.

“Don’t work too hard, now.”  He smirked.

“I’ll try not to.”  She grinned, “bye.” 

She was having a hard time taking her eyes off of him as he stood with such confidence in his doorway, leaning his side against the frame with his arms folded comfortably over his chest.  Finally she managed to turn away and focus her sight down the hallway.

“See ya later.”  He called to her.   She looked back one more time and grinned before her feet actually started moving.  His eyes were burning a whole through back, knowing that he was still watching her.  At last she heard his door shut and breathed a huge sigh of relief.  What in the hell was going on?  This was absolutely crazy.  Just plain madness.   She had no idea what to think now.

But the memory of him so close and his arm brushing up against her made that tingly feeling sneak right back up.  Why did she already find herself hoping to see him again – and soon?

©2001 BrandyRae

Chapter 4

Amanda was in a complete daze as she strolled towards the elevator.  If it hadn’t been for the fact that she could find her way around the hotel blindfolded, she probably would have gotten lost.  Any other place and she would have been in big trouble.   But thankfully that wasn’t the case, so she was free to live in la la land for the moment. 

As she stood there waiting for the elevator to arrive, his words played out in her head repeatedly.   Honestly, I just wanted to see you again.

She couldn’t brush the grin from her face after hearing those words.  HE had wanted to see HER?  No matter how surreal it seemed, or how surprised she was by those words, nothing could wipe away that cheesy smile because those words had pretty much swept her right off her feet.  Well, once they actually sank in, anyway.  It had taken a couple of minutes.  Her first reaction was pure and utter shock, no doubt about it.

Finally the elevator arrived, but it wasn’t empty.  Three people were unveiled as the doors opened.  One member of *NSYNC, one bodyguard, and one man she had never seen.  She grinned at all three of them as they passed, then stepped inside her ride down to the third floor.

But just as the doors began to close, JC’s band mate turned around quickly and stopped the doors with his hand.  “You’re the hotel girl.”  Chris spoke, his hand pressed against the frame of the elevator.

Amanda wasn’t quite sure how to react, but she was pretty positive that her expression was more than a little confused.  “This is my hotel, yes.”  Sort of.

"Okay, that’s what I thought.”  The dark headed man looked at her mischievously and slowly nodded his head.  “You turned my friend down for lunch.  Shame on you.”  He waved an index finger back and forth before letting go of the elevator doors.  Once again they began to close, all the while she could see him standing in the hallway and shaking his head disapprovingly back and forth.

The doors finally closed and Amanda was safely alone.  She took in a deep breath and chuckled quietly to herself.  “Okay, I take that back.  He is goofy.”  She smirked.

Now completely to herself – except for the small video camera she knew was hidden in the corner – she let her mind wander to the feeling of his strong arm brushing up against her.  The thought alone sent a chill down her spine and tied a knot in her stomach.  In a mere fifteen minutes time, her fascination with the man had grown into something much deeper.

As she debarked on the third floor, wanting nothing more than to sit in her office and daydream about her new crush, she couldn’t help but notice Marcy heading straight for her, full steam ahead.  The girl looked to be on some sort of mission.  “Amanda.   I’ve been looking all over for you.”  She called from a good ten feet away. 

A few seconds later, as the two met up, Marcy stopped dead in her tracks, took one step back and folded her arms over her chest as she gave her friend the once over.  “You look different.”  The woman finally spoke.

“I do?”

“Yes, I can’t quite put my finger on it, but there’s something…  Where were you, anyway?  I’ve been looking all over for you.”

Panic took over.   She had to make up an excuse and quick.   “Um, I was, uh…”  Of course, she didn’t have one.

“Spit it out, girl.”  Marcy remarked.

“I was upstairs.”  Amanda finally announced.

Her friend just looked at her, her nose crinkled with bewilderment.  “Upstairs?  That narrows it down.  Anyway, who cares.   You’ve got to come down to the store.   We got a shipment in today and there’s this dress that has your name all over it.”

”Oh, Marcy.  You know I’m not really in-“

“I will take no argument from you young lady.”  Marcy insisted, grabbing Amanda by the wrist and pulling her towards the elevator. 

“Alright, alright.”  Amanda finally gave in and willingly went with her friend.  Why not?  It would take a whole lot to bump her off the cloud she was floating on.

After JC’s late arrival the day before, he wanted to be sure that he made it on time for the video shoot that evening.  In fact, he decided that arriving early was an even better idea and called Mike shortly after Amanda had left.   Oh, Amanda.  Thoughts of her continued to clutter his mind.  He still couldn’t understand what it was about her that struck him so deeply, but the girl had made an imprint on him like no one had. 

As he and Mike made their venture out of the hotel, he realized he was completely zoned out.  Lately that had been happening more than ever it seemed.  His bodyguard bumped his shoulder and JC took in a deep sigh.   “Huh?”  He asked.

“Hey man, isn’t that your girl?”  Mike discreetly nodded towards the same clothing store JC had spent time in two days before. 

“Huh?”   JC asked again, thinking by the words “your girl” Mike had been referring to Jessie and that definitely would have sent him for a loop.  But when he saw her, he nearly lost it.  His jaw must have dropped because he was completely speechless.  Amanda had a gorgeous figure hiding underneath all those bulky business suits she usually wore.  He noticed that very clearly now as she stood in front of a full length mirror near the back of the store wearing the sexiest black dress he had probably ever seen.  Or maybe it was just her in it that made it so sexy…

Either way, she had to have it and he was bound and determined to be the one who bought it for her.   He marched towards the store with complete determination.

“Hey, where you going?”  Mike asked.

“To buy her that dress.”  JC answered insistently.

“Are you nuts?”  Mike asked.  “You barely know the girl.”

“I know she needs that dress.  Look at her.”

Mike shrugged and agreed. “Yeah, she does look pretty hot.  I take back what I said about her before.”

If JC hadn’t been on such a mission he would have asked what it was exactly Mike HAD said before, but right now he only had one thing on his mind – Amanda.

He stepped into the store and could instantly hear the girls chatting in the back.  “I don’t know Marcy.  This is a little revealing for me.”  Amanda debated as she continually checked over her image in the mirror.

“No, you look amazing in that dress.  You could have any man you wanted wearing that dress.”  Marcy pepped.

“Oh please.”  She smirked.   “I don’t think so.”

”She’s right.”  JC stepped in as Mike stayed a few feet behind him.  Marcy had been right.  Amanda could have any man she wanted wearing that dress, himself included.

Amanda froze stiff.  She didn’t even look at him in the mirror.  The low-back dress was staring him right in the face as he stood only a few steps behind her.  At that moment, he wasn't even sure exactly what he was doing.   Just that he knew he had to see her.  When Mike had pointed her out in that store, he knew right then that he had to see her at that very moment.  And that feeling had more than doubled once he caught sight of her up close – her creamy colored skin, the thin defined muscles in her back, the curve of her waist and the roundness of her – oh, he had better stop those thoughts before he got carried away.

“Well, Mr. Chasez, I knew you were a smart man.”  Marcy grinned, standing beside the tall mirror and in front of Amanda, just enough to give her a quick wink.  “Anyway,” she continued.  “I see I have other customers waiting so I’ll leave you two alone.”

The flighty woman gave him an ear-to-ear grin as she walked past and headed for his bodyguard.  JC could barely take his eyes off Amanda. 

But it was obvious his surprise had made her uncomfortable and that was the last thing he had meant to do.  So, instead of complimenting her as he had wanted, he thought it would be best to ease the tension.   “You know, when I said I’d see ya later I really didn’t think it would be so soon, and regardless of what you might think, I swear I’m not stalking you.”

Her shoulders visibly loosened as she finally managed to look at his reflection behind her in the mirror.  “I didn’t think that.”  She spoke shyly.

“So, are you gonna get it?”  He asked, slowly stepping up beside her.

“Um, I don’t think so.  It’s not really my style.”  She answered, closing her arms around her breasts as she turned to face him.  It was obvious she wasn’t used to wearing those kinds of things.  He wondered about Amanda’s past and why she seemed to be so self conscious.  The girl had nothing to be self conscious about, especially wearing that dress.

“Well, you look incredible.”  Gently he reached to wipe her hair from her shoulder, not even thinking twice about the subtle gesture.   His finger tips brushed against her bare skin and it felt just as good as he’d imagined, smooth as silk. 

But Amanda seemed a little taken aback by his touch, she held onto herself even tighter as she took a step away.   “JC, I can’t sleep with you.”  

The words blurted out of her mouth and he could hardly believe his ears.  “What?”  He asked with shock.

“You heard me.  I can’t have some one night stand or fling or whatever.  I’m just not that kind of girl.”  She continued.

Her words had stung.  There was no question about that.  He could only stare at her with confusion.  “What kind of guy do you think I am?  Is that what you think I want?”

“I don’t know what you want with me.”  She remarked.

He gazed at her with disbelief.  Where had that come from all the sudden?  He thought they had shared a connection.  He never meant to give her the wrong idea.  He was so shocked he didn’t even know what to say.

“Don’t you have a girlfriend already?”  She finally asked, her pale eyes piercing him as she stared so intensely. 

He looked away, knowing he couldn’t lie.  And even though he was enormously attracted to Amanda and did have a great desire to get to know her better, he remembered what he had known all along – new relationships were a bad idea.   “Amanda, I didn’t mean to give you the wrong impression.  You’re right, I do have a girlfriend.”

JC could see the disappointment in her eyes and he realized that he had been way out of line.  He had been leading her on.  What was he thinking?  He had no time to develop a relationship with this girl no matter how much he liked her.  Plus he was leaving town soon.  After that he’d probably never see her again.

“Maybe you should just go now.”  She spoke softly and he knew he better do as she said. 

“Okay.”   He agreed, but he couldn’t leave and let her think he was such a huge jerk that he was only trying to get down her pants.  “But please, don’t be angry with me.”  He said quietly, stepping forward and closing the distance between them, even if it did mean risking a slap in the face.  “You think I’m a jerk, I know.  But I wasn’t trying to get you into my bed and I hope you realize that I do genuinely like you as a person.”

She didn’t answer and couldn’t even look him in the eye.

“JC, just go.  Please.”   She finally spoke after a brief moment, her voice so quiet he could barely hear.

“If that’s what you want.  I won’t bother you anymore.”  He wanted to reach out and grab her, to tell her that he really cared for her and was dying to know her better, but he couldn’t do it.  His mind had finally woken up and dropped reality right on top of him.  So, instead, he flashed her a tight smile, turned and walked away.

Amanda stood trembling, her arms still clenched onto the expensive garment as she hugged her chest.  She watched him walk out of the store and a piece of heart broke away as the door opened and shut, and he disappeared. 

She was on the brink of tears and that was a rare thing for Amanda.  When she did break down, she never let anyone see it.  So, as Marcy marched towards her, she fled into the dressing room to remove the dress and be somewhat alone, hoping the sting of tears would back away.   Even though she knew Marcy would be banging on the door any second.

Which, of course, proved to be true.  “Amanda, open up.”  Marcy called through the slatted wood door.

“This dress is so wrong for me.”  Amanda tried so hard to ignore the hurt she was feeling, but her words came out shaky and she knew Marcy had noticed.  “I could never wear something like this.” 

“Open the door, Amanda.”  Marcy’s tone was insistent.

Amanda ignored her friend as she slumped onto the chair in the tiny room.  He had really wanted her.  She had seen it in his eyes.  He had meant it when he said that she looked incredible. She so wished he would have never snuck up on her like that.  Less than an hour before she had been feeling really good about their little meeting and now she felt hurt and disappointed. 

Even though, her intuition had been right on the money and it was better to learn now than later on down the road.  But what a trip down that road it would have been…  She reminded herself that sometimes it was better just to dream – and much safer, too.

“I’m getting the key.”  Marcy finally threatened. 

“Okay, okay.”  Amanda gave in and opened the door, still wearing the dress as she sat pouting.

“Sweetie, what happened?”  Marcy asked with concern.

“He touched me and I freaked out.  I totally panicked.   I was awful… But it’s better this way, really.”  Amanda interjected for herself.

“It is?   How?  He really likes you, Amanda.”

“He looked at me like I was a piece of meat.”

“No, he did not.”  Marcy argued.   “He looked at you like he really cared, like he could see the beauty that you are so good at hiding all the time.”

“It was just the dress.  He saw flesh – flesh that was not intended for him to see.  I should have never tried on this stupid dress.”

“It wasn’t the dress.  It was you.”   Marcy argued.  The woman was very persistent, but it didn’t matter what she said, Amanda knew things would be better this way.  “So, where exactly did he touch you?” 

“On the shoulder.”  Amanda answered with a sigh as she stared down at her bare toes.  She had even let him see her without shoes on.  The man had seen her bare feet – although, she had a sneaking suspicion that wasn’t exactly what he was interested in.

“And how did it feel?”

“Wonderful.”  Amanda sighed once more, lost in a state of remembrance, but quickly she woke up once she realized her admittance.  “Oh, but it doesn’t matter.  He has a girlfriend.” 

“So.”  

“What do you mean, so?  He’s involved and, may I remind you, leaving very soon and I will probably never see him again, ever.”

Marcy leaned in closer, close enough to invade Amanda’s own personal space, and whispered, “He was gonna buy you that dress.”

If that was supposed to make Amanda feel better, it didn’t.  The last thing she wanted was for him to buy her things.  “I wouldn’t have let him.”  She whispered back, and then questioned her friends announcement.  “Wait, how do you know that?”  She asked, no longer whispering.

“Mr. Mikey told me.”  Marcy grinned.   The girl was such a flirt she could just about get anything out of any man.

“His bodyguard?”

“Yes, according to his big buff security guard, mister sexy, blue-eyed pop star just about fell over when he saw you in that dress and just rushed right in here to see little ol’ you – but, you blew it.”

Amanda stood and pointed to the door with a roll of her eyes.  “Okay, get out now.  I need to change.”

“Glad to see you’re feeling better.”  Marcy spouted as she stepped backwards out of the dressing room.  “He really does like you, you know.”

“Go away, Marcy.”  Amanda spoke sternly.

“I’m going, I’m going.”  Marcy replied.

It didn’t matter, it was better to end it now, regardless.

A few minutes later when Amanda stepped out of the dressing room, clothed in her proper business attire once again, Marcy stood behind the cash register with an evil grin.  “You looked so much better in the dress.”  She sighed.

Amanda rolled her eyes yet another time at her friends’ comment and didn’t even stop to say goodbye.

“Where are you going?”  Marcy asked.

“Away.”   Amanda answered without looking back.

“You’re leaving the hotel?  What happens when he comes back?”

“That’s why I’m leaving.  Now just give it up already.” 

Amanda didn’t even stop at her condo to grab a change of clothes.  She headed straight for the parking garage thinking of nothing more than the serenity of her father’s beach house – which was of course unoccupied at the moment – only thirty minutes away.  Maybe there she would be able to sort out her mixed up head and get back on track.

It was nearly ten p.m. when the guys got a break from filming while the director and crew went over a few set changes.  JC plopped down on an empty sofa and inhaled a hefty sigh as he covered his face with his palms.  “What’s wrong with me?”  He asked himself quietly.

“I ask myself that all the time.”  He hadn’t been expecting an answer, but still wasn’t too surprised to look up and find Chris sitting down beside him.

“You ask what’s wrong with yourself?”  JC remarked, turning towards his friend.

“No, I ask what’s wrong with you.”  Chris smirked.  

JC looked away, staring off into emptiness.   Chris’ antics didn’t phase him one bit.  Instead he focused on the crew across the soundstage as they prepared the next set for a shoot that would begin very soon.  It was noisy and busy and people were zipping by every ten seconds, but JC felt pretty empty inside after his last encounter with Amanda.

“So, I ran into your little hotel hottie earlier.” Chris would have to bring that up.  He hadn’t spoken a word to anyone about what happened and that's pretty much the way he wanted to keep it.  The only one that knew was Mike and he hadn’t even mentioned it.  JC figured his bodyguard knew him well enough to know when he did not want to talk about something and he was thankful for that because the last thing he wanted to do was to talk about Amanda Ballard and the crazy things he felt whenever she came into close range.

“She’s not my anything.”  JC mumbled.  “And I don’t really want to talk about it.”

“Ooh, did I hit a soar spot?  Is there something you’d like to share?”

“It’s dumb, and no, not really.”  JC answered.

“If it’s so dumb than how come you don’t want to talk about it?”  Chris continued.

“Seriously, man, just let it go.” 

“Okay, sorry.”  Chris finally let up realizing that his friend was very serious.  “If you change your mind, you know the door’s always open.”

©2001 BrandyRae

Chapter 5

The morning sun crept in through the floor to ceiling windows and even though Amanda knew she needed to get up and get back to the hotel, she buried her head under the pillow just aching for a little more sleep.  Instead she only lied awake and thought about him.  Funny how only a few days could change her life so drastically.  It was times like these she wished her mother was around to give her the advice she needed so much.

Of course she could never talk to her father about these sort of things.  She didn’t talk to him about much of anything besides the hotel and if he found out she had even the slightest bit of interest in some pop musician, well, he probably would have blown a hole through the roof.  Talking with him was definitely out of the question.

Finally deciding that it was no use laying around, she got up and put herself together as best she could, considering that she had no clean clothing with her.  The sun had barely peaked so she figured if she hurried back to the hotel and snuck in the back entrance, hopefully, no one would notice her.

With no traffic she was able to make it back in twenty minutes.  She pulled her car into the spot reserved just for her and quickly walked towards the garage elevator.  She was still a few feet away when she realized the small group of people in front of her.  It didn’t even take her a second to realize who it was.   In fact, she was just about to turn around and go back the other direction when she was caught.  But it wasn’t JC who had turned around and noticed her, it was Justin and he had looked back at Amanda with a charming grin, even for six o’clock in the morning when she was sure he hadn’t gotten any sleep the night before.

She was almost caught up as they boarded one of the elevators.  Amanda slowed down her pace a notch or two hoping it would be full and she could catch the next one, but Justin, the obviously polite guy that he was, held it for her.

Nervously she stepped into the somewhat crowded elevator that held not only Justin, but also Joey and JC, and a few others as well.  Amanda couldn’t bring herself to look at him.  He stood in the back and she in the front and that was just fine by her, although she would swear he was staring straight at her.  She’d bet money on that one.

This was the last thing she had wanted this morning.  She was a mess, she was tired, she was a little on the depressed side and now she was feeling guilty for the words that she had spoken to him before.  Surely after accusing him of such things, he would never speak to her again. 

And she wasn’t surprised that he hadn’t said one word as they rode silently up to the main floor of the hotel where everyone would have to catch another elevator to get to their rooms.  

“Man, I’m so tired.”  Joey spoke up.   “Can I sleep all day?”

“Yes, you can.”  One of the unfamiliar gentlemen replied.

“Good.”  

Justin looked over at Amanda for a second time and smiled.  He was either a very nice guy or he could sense Amanda’s uncomfortable ness.  She didn’t doubt either one.

When the doors finally opened, Amanda was the first one out and she didn’t even think about looking back.  She focused on the next elevator that was just a short trip down the hall.  As she stepped inside, alone, she breathed a sigh of relief.  But just when she thought her escape had been successful, a hand reached between the almost closed doors and opened them right back up again. 

In stepped a very calm JC – alone.  His mere presence nearly killed her.  His ever-so attractive, 100-percent male presence.  Oh how she ached to just reach out and grab him.

He leaned against the wall and slid one hand in his pocket, the other hovered above the panel of buttons on the wall.  “Which floor?”  He asked.

“Eighteen.”  Amanda answered, barely glancing at him from the corner of her eye.

“Do you hate me now?”  He asked.  “I’m really sorry for giving you the wrong idea.”

She couldn’t hold out, she buckled and gazed at him with tired eyes.  “I don’t hate anyone.”  She answered.  “Hate is a very strong word.”

“Okay, so you dislike me?”  He asked.

“No, I don’t dislike you, either.”

Only three more floors to go, she couldn’t wait to be home free, but as she glanced up at the digital reading, JC smacked the stop button.

“What are you doing?”  Amanda asked with panic.

“I’m not going to try anything, okay?  I just want to talk to you for a sec.” 

“You’re going to give security a heart attack.”  Amanda remarked.

“Yours or mine?”  He asked with the most devilish grin.  A grin that made her pulse race.  Oh, why was he torturing her this way?

“Both.”

“Well, I don’t know about yours, but mine have had it pretty easy lately.  They’re due for a little scare.”  That grin of his hadn’t vanished.  Instead it seemed to have grown contagious for Amanda could feel that she was now grinning as well.  She could not deny the fact that she liked him, even though she was trying really, really hard.  It was clear by the sparkle in his eyes that he knew, but that didn’t change the facts.   He had a girlfriend - a huge fact - and then there was that confusion as to why he was even interested.   That was the thing she didn’t understand most of all.  Men had never paid attention to her and now all of the sudden some huge celebrity was making a big fuss over her and she had no clue as to why.

“Okay, fine.”  Amanda reached for the button on the panel and started up the elevator again.  “You can talk to me, but not here.”

“Where?”

“I don’t care.”  Really, she knew there was a good chance they were being watched by security and that’s why she wanted to get out of the elevator.

“Did you want to follow me back to my room?”  He asked.  “And I don’t mean that in a sexual way – I swear.”

“I really do need a shower.”  She sighed.

“You know, I was wondering why you’re wearing the same clothes as yesterday, but I wasn’t about to ask.”  Now that was teasing and she could tell.  And, even though her first reaction was to roll her eyes smugly at his sarcasm, a tiny grin did sneak its way across her lips.

“Um, excuse me, so are you.”  She finally remarked, being sure to hide just how much she was enjoying his playfulness.

“Yes, but I have an excuse.  I worked all night and you know it.”  She did know that and for some odd reason it gave her a great deal of satisfaction.

The doors opened on floor eighteen and he looked at her questionably, “well?” 

“Fine.”   She agreed and hit the close button.  “So, where is your bodyguard anyway?”

“Probably waiting on my floor.”  He answered and then changed the subject quickly.  “You never told me why you haven’t changed clothes this morning?”

“Do you really think that’s any of your business?” 

“Ooh, sharp this morning, aren’t we?”

Amanda only responded with a wry grin.  The doors opened and JC had been exactly right because Mike was standing just inside the hall, waiting patiently with his arms crossed over his bulky chest.  She could only imagine what he was thinking.  “Now, what was that all about?”  The large man asked.

“What?”   JC asked innocently as Amanda followed behind him.

“It took you ten minutes to go up twenty-one floors.”  Mike spoke deeply.

“Hey man, you must be tired because you’re losin’ your mind.  It did not take ten minutes.”  JC argued and then looked back at Amanda to give her a devious wink. 

“Whatever.”  Mike shrugged.  

JC slowed his pace and let Mike walk in front, giving him the chance to stand next to Amanda.  “So, you were gonna tell me why you didn’t go home last night.”  He continued, glancing at her sideways.

“You’re not giving up on that, are you?”  She replied, looking straight ahead and not giving him the satisfaction that he was waiting for.

“Nope.”

“Maybe I just had a laundry crisis and that’s why I’m wearing the same outfit.”

“Yeah… I believe that one.”  He smirked and stopped as they came across his room.  “This is me.”  He said, pointing to the door.

“I’ll be going now since I see no crazy fans lurking in the hallway.”  Mike announced, giving Amanda the most inquiring look.  A look she wasn’t sure how to respond to, so she didn’t.

“Yeah, see ya later.”  JC told him and stuck his key in the lock.

“Your girlfriends not in there, is she?”  Amanda asked, her tone just a touch on the evil side.

“No, she’s not.”  He answered, shooting that attitude right back at her.  “Come on in.”  He told her as he opened the door.

Amanda stepped inside and noted that it looked pretty much the same as it had the day before.  Not too messy, but not exactly spotless either.  What she did realize right away is that it was absolutely freezing.

Apparently, he noticed too.  “Oops, guess I left the air conditioner on.”  He said, gazing at her with wide eyes before he trotted towards the controller to switch it off.  “Are you gonna charge me double now?”

“I should.”  She replied, plopping down into an empty arm chair.

“You want a blanket or a sweatshirt or something?”  He asked from behind.  She couldn’t exactly see what he was doing, but she was awful curious.

“No thanks.   It’s not that cold.”

“Okay, but don’t say I didn’t offer.”

Amanda sat quietly, her legs crossed and hands folded neatly in her lap, waiting for him to appear.   When he finally did, he had taken off his shoes and his hat and looked just a bit more comfortable as he plopped down on the sofa.  

“So, you wanna tell me why you freaked out on me yesterday?”  He asked out of the blue.  She had been waiting for that question.

“I did not freak out.”  She argued.  That was the only thing she could think of to say, even though, really, she had completely freaked out.

“Um, yes, you did.”

“Look, JC.   I really don’t understand your interest in me.”  Amanda admitted, watching as an amused look spread across his face.

“Do I make you nervous?”  Well, if she hadn’t been before, she definitely was now thanks to that bold question.

But of course she would never admit it. "No."

“I don’t?”  It was obvious he didn’t believe her.

“Why would you think that?” 

“Come on, I’m not an idiot.  I barely touched you yesterday and you accused me of just trying to get you – never mind, I don’t even want to say it.  That was a really not-nice thing to say.”

“If you’re trying to make me feel guilty, it’s working.”  She confessed.

“I’m not trying to make you feel guilty.  I just want to know why.”

She fidgeted in the chair, more than a little uncomfortable with the subject matter.  He was forcing her to talk to him and, well, that was the last thing she wanted to do.  Amanda was not good with confrontation – at all.

When she didn’t answer, he scooted across the couch so he was sitting just at the corner, which was fairly close to her chair.  He folded his arms over the armrest of the plushy sofa and rested his chin on top of them, staring at her with those dazzling blue eyes.  Finally after a minute, he spoke.  “I do need to get some sleep today, you know.  I don’t have forever.”

“Why do you care?”

“Do you always answer a question with a question?”  He asked, sitting up straight and pulling his legs up to rest on top of the coffee table.  He glanced down at his feet and then looked over at her with a boyish smirk.  “Should I not be doing that in front of you?”

Amanda only gazed at him from the tops of her lids.  It stunned her the way he could be so serious one minute and completely adorable the next.   Of course it was that adorable side that really got under her skin.  His boyish charm was really rubbing off on her.

“But seriously, you can talk to me.  Don’t be nervous around me.  I’m just a regular guy, I swear.”  He told her.

Oh, but that was so far from the truth.  He wasn’t just a regular guy.  He was a guy that made her feel a bunch of different things she had never felt before, and they were feelings that she really liked, but were also scared of just a little.  “It’s not that.”  She finally said.

“It’s not what?”

“You know, that whole celebrity thing.”

“Well, I didn’t think it was.  I mean, I don’t really look at myself that way.”  He was not making this easy for her at all.  He paused for a moment and then continued.  “So, I do make you nervous?”

“I guess, a little, sometimes.”  She mumbled.

“How old are you?”

That question was a little surprising.  She wasn’t sure where it had come from.  “How old do you think I am?  And don’t you know you’re never supposed to ask a woman her age?”

He chuckled before giving a response.  “That only counts for women who are older than 40.”

“Really?   Who made up that rule?”

“Would you stop dodging my questions and answer?  Jeez girl, you’re driving me freakin’ nuts.”

“Oh, I’m so sorry.  You’re the one that invited me here.”  She remarked.   “And, I’m 26 if you really must know.”

”Thank you.  Was that so hard?”

Amanda was becoming a little frustrated with his twenty questions, and even though she did enjoy being in his company, she was still confused and realized that she still needed that shower.   “You know, I should probably get going.   You obviously need your sleep and I still need to take a shower.”  She stood up.

“Amanda, wait.”  He said, standing up as well.

“What?”  

“You never told me what happened yesterday?”  His voice turned soft and was filled with a sincerity that made her want to explain, but how could she tell him the truth?  The truth that she had a huge crush on him and the feelings that had overwhelmed her when she felt his touch had scared the crap out of her because she had never felt anything like it before.

“I don’t know what happened.  I’m really sorry for the way I spoke to you, okay?”  She hoped that would be enough, that he wouldn’t want to know more.

“Can I see you again?”

“I don’t know.”  She sighed deeply and dropped her gaze to the beige carpet between their feet.

“I can tell that you’re a little unsure about this and all, but I genuinely like you, Amanda.  I enjoy being around you and I’d really like to spend more time with you.  I promise my intentions are nothing but harmless.”

Her sight returned to his and she could tell by his eyes that he was being truthful.  She’d sensed that he wanted to touch her, and God how she’d love to feel his arms around her, but she wasn’t that brave and was sure he wouldn’t dare try it after what happened the day before.  “Aren’t you leaving soon?”  She finally asked.

“Tomorrow.”  He answered.   “But I don’t have much to do today.   Just make an appearance at this charity event later and then I’m free after that.  We don’t have to stay in the hotel.  We could go somewhere else.”

Every bone in her body ached for her to say yes.  There were so many unanswered questions filtering through her brain, but her heart and soul would not let her forfeit this opportunity.  “Okay.”   She finally answered.

That boyish grin fell across his lips again and for a second or two she pondered over what it would be like for those lips to actually kiss her.  But that foolish thought didn’t last long as she pushed it away assertively.  “I’ll call you later?”  He asked.

“Sure.   I don’t think I’ll be working much today, but you can catch me in my apartment.”

“And where’s that?”  He asked curiously.

“On the eighteenth floor.” 

“You live here?”

“Yeah, so.”

“Boy, you don’t get out much, do you?”

“I do.”   She argued, but not very convincingly.

“Anyway,” he said.  “I’ll walk you out.”

Amanda walked towards the door with him following very close behind her, she could practically feel the warmth his body exuded as he stood behind her. 

They made it to the exit and she turned to say goodbye, but he spoke before she even had a chance.  “I’d give you a hug, but I’d hate for that violent side to come out.”  He smiled.  “So, how ‘bout a hand shake?”

Glancing down at his outstretched hand, she took in a deep breath.  “Sure.”  She complied and slid her palm against his, all those wonderful feelings shooting throughout her body once again.  She had never realized a handshake could be so sensual, but as he brushed his thumb over the top of her hand and then stroked her palm tenderly with his fingers as he pulled away – well – she felt positively tingly from head to toe. 

She blinked a few times, trying her best to shake out of the hazy fog he had just created around her.   But it was then that her lips fell into a stupor and she pretty much forgot how to speak.  “Well… um… yeah, I’ll talk to you later – I guess.”

He laughed quietly and gave her the most charming smile she had pretty much ever seen.  It really was crazy the things he made her feel inside.   You’d never believe that normally she was a very head strong person and not usually tongue-tied, at all.  Not around him, though.  Around him she was a complete idiot.

“Do I really make you that nervous?”  He asked softly, leaning in even closer, his breath beating across her skin.  “Just by touching your hand?”

He reached for it again, her eyes closing as he rubbed her palm with his thumb and all of those tiny little sparks danced through her for a second time. 

“You have really beautiful hands.”  He complimented her and instantly her eyes popped open.  His face was so close to hers, yet his eyes stared down at the hand he held so gently.

”Thanks.” 

There eyes met and she could have sworn he was going to kiss her, she prepared for it in every way possible, but instead he reached for the door handle beside her and smiled once more.  “So, I’ll call you before I leave and let you know about what time I’ll be back.”  He said.

“Okay.”   She replied.  “Get some rest."

“I plan on it, don’t worry.”  He opened the door and she stepped into the hallway, still a bit dazed and feeling just a little out of sorts.  “Enjoy that shower now.”  He grinned devilishly and Amanda couldn’t help but catch the flirty tone in his voice.  She might not have been very experienced, but she knew what she heard.  She was no dummy.

©2001 BrandyRae

 Chapter 6

Her nerves had kicked in double-time as she strode down the hallway on his floor.   Just as she was almost to room 2707, she heard two giggly girls coming around the corner and decided to keep walking instead of stopping at his door.  Once they were out of sight she turned around and walked back.

By now a good ten minutes had passed since she had left the first time, she hoped she wouldn’t be disturbing his rest.  Taking a deep breath, she knocked as hard as she could and then stood still, listening to the sound of her heart racing inside her chest. 

When he didn’t answer, she knocked for a second time and felt just a little bit guilty about it, but finally the door opened and she nearly collapsed at the sight of him.  He was shirtless, wearing a pair of striped pajama bottoms and talking on his cell phone – and Amanda felt like a complete goof because she suddenly forgot the whole reason why she was there.   Luckily her memory returned after a second or two.

But it was obvious by the look on his face that he definitely wasn’t disappointed to see her.  He smiled and waved her inside, then shut the door quickly.  “Okay, mom.  I promise I’ll call you tomorrow...  Yes, I am going to sleep right now…  I know.”   After an “I love you, too” and another “I’ll talk to you tomorrow,” he finally hung up.

He grinned widely at Amanda as he tilted his head just barely to one side.  “Couldn’t stay away?”  He asked her playfully.

“Sorry to bug you.”  She said.  “It’s just, uh, I forgot to give you my phone number.”

“You’re right, you did.  Good thing you came back.”

“Yeah, sorry.”  She apologized one more time.

JC let out a soft smirk and then shook his head subtly back and forth.  Both of his hands reached out to her, landing firmly on her shoulders.  “Loosen up, Amanda.”  He told her as he shook her gently.  After a few seconds, he let go and picked up his phone again.  “Okay, shoot.”  He said.

Amanda was so out of it because he had just touched her again, not to mention the fact that his bare chest was only a few inches away and looking very nice to say the least, that she just about forgot her own phone number.  “Huh?”

“You’re number.  I’m ready.”

God, she felt like an idiot.  “Oh, right.” She finally remembered and spouted off the seven digits.

“Okay, we’re going to work on that.”  He told her, sliding his phone back onto the table after punching her number into the keypad. 

“On what?”  She asked.

“That nervousness of yours.”  He placed a hand on her shoulder.  “As much as I’d love for you to stay, I must sleep now.  I promised my mom and everything.”  He explained.  All Amanda could really think about was the warmth of his hand against her. 

“I know, I’m sorry.”

“Would you quit apologizing.”  He told her, a tiny bit of frustration lingering in his voice.

“Okay.”  She said timidly.   “Sorry.”

“Uh.”  He sighed and moved his hand just down her back to nudge her forward a step.  “Come on.”  He told her.   “I’m not trying kick you out, really, but you should go now.”

The haze finally clearing somewhat, she began thinking like her normal self again.  “Right, and I still haven’t taken a shower.”

“And trust me, you need one.”  He teased, but Amanda wasn’t used to that kind of teasing and the look on her face must have been a little unpleasant.  “But don’t worry, you’re still cute as hell.”  He added.  “Now, I will call you later.  Promise.”

“Okay, bye.”  She said, reaching for the door.  He grabbed onto it above her head as she opened it slowly until his strength took over and opened it all the way. 

“See ya later.”  He called out to her quietly as she stepped into the hallway.

“Bye.”  She said once more and he shut the door. 

That had been crazy.  Amanda realized that she was definitely getting in over her head on this one, but it didn’t matter because there was no way she was going to give up this opportunity, regardless of the impractical circumstances.  For once in her life she was going to take a chance and not be so afraid.  This was it and she was ready.

“Okay, that girl is making me crazy.”  JC spoke to himself as he wandered towards the bed.  “She has no idea.  That’s the funny thing.  She has no idea whatsoever.”  He shook his head with incomprehension as he slid under the covers.  “I have to sleep now.”  He told himself quietly.  “No thoughts of Amanda, just sleep.”  Yeah right.   He could try his best, but that was nearly impossible.  The girl had invaded his thoughts one hundred percent and she had no knowledge of that fact at all.

Amanda was either very naive, putting up a really good front or not very familiar when it came to the opposite sex.  He was hoping it wasn’t just a good front because he really liked that genuine innocence about her.  Regardless, he was eager to discover the truth.  In fact, he was anxious to discover a lot of things about her.

Maybe he had fibbed just a little when he said his intentions were nothing but harmless.  They were, sort of.  He didn’t intend on hurting her, but he did want her in the worst way.  More than that, he ached for her.  It seemed she had woken up all of those parts of him that had been sleeping for the past few months.  Yes, now his whole body was alive and kicking, and leaving him somewhat frustrated – sexually.

But he wasn’t about to push her.  He didn’t want to rush things with Amanda.  He had almost scared her away once, he wasn’t going to do it again.

The girl was twenty-six years old, but emotionally she seemed much younger.  He was pretty sure that when it came to business she acted very much her age, but it was obvious that she was more than a little shy when it came to personal relations.  He wondered if that had anything to do with her mother’s passing.   But then again, that had only been three years before, which would have made Amanda twenty-three at the time and definitely old enough to have had her share of boyfriends.  He didn’t get it at all, but he was bound to figure it out.

After that much needed shower, Amanda felt much more like herself.  Since she had decided to sort of take the day off, she lounged around her apartment in her only pair of jeans and a t-shirt.  But it wasn’t long before she decided she’d better get up and do some cleaning just in case JC happened to end up there later on.  She doubted that, but it was better to be safe than sorry.  He’d probably have her meet him at his place again.

Really, she didn’t know what to think about the whole idea.   The only thing she knew for sure is that she was very excited about it.

He liked her.  It was so blatantly obvious that she would have had to been blind not to notice.  The thought alone made her all giddy and excited.  No one had ever acted that way with her before.  No one. 

Amanda had just finished vacuuming when her phone rang.  Her heart skipped a beat as she realized there was a possibility that it was him.  True, it was only 10:30 in the morning and he was more than likely asleep, but there was that slim chance that he couldn’t sleep and just had to hear her voice. Okay, so she was reaching, but she couldn’t deny the fact that it had crossed her mind.

After two rings she answered, “hello?”

“Amanda, are you okay?  I’ve been worried about you.” To her somewhat disappointment, it was Marcy.

“Yeah, I’m fine.  Why wouldn’t I be?”

“Okay, maybe you’ve forgotten what happened yesterday with that sexy pop star?  Come on, now.   You can talk to me.  It’s okay.”

Amanda slid the receiver away from her mouth and giggled softly.   Oh, how was she supposed to explain this one?   “Thanks, Marcy.  But I assure you that everything is fine now, I am fine now.   I promise.”

“You sound funny.”  Marcy remarked.  “Wait a minute… I think I’ve got it figured out.  You like him don’t you?”

“What are you talking about?”  Amanda asked, plopping down on to her sofa.

“You’ve got something going on with him.  Did you see him again?”

“Marcy, what are you talking about?”  Amanda was trying her best not to divulge any information.  Not that she didn’t trust Marcy, but she wasn’t quite ready to talk about it, yet.

“Don’t play dumb with me, little miss.  I’m coming up there.” 

“Excuse me, maybe I don’t want company right now.”   Amanda said.

“Too bad.  I’ll be there in ten.”  And without another word, Marcy hung up.

“Oh, I can’t believer her.”  Amanda sighed to herself.  She knew when Marcy got there she would end up spilling the beans.  As much as she wanted to keep it under wraps, she was also dying to tell somebody.  Of course Marcy would keep it a secret, so she was safe.  Plus, Amanda didn’t really have too many girlfriends.  Marcy would have to do.

Ten minutes, exactly, passed before Marcy knocked on Amanda’s front door.  The woman looked down-right flustered as she stepped inside Amanda’s three bedroom condo.  “You’re wearing jeans.”  The first words to escape her mouth.

“Yes.  I’m taking the day off.”

“You never take a day off.”  Marcy remarked, a little out of breath.

“Did you jog up here, or what?”  Amanda asked as the two sat down in the living room.

“Sort of.  So, you wanna tell me what’s going on?”

“With what?” 

“With what?”  She repeated with a roll of her hazel colored eyes.  “With that fine ass man that keeps following you around.  That’s what.”

“He’s not following me.” 

“Look, Amanda.  I know we’ve only known each other for a little over a year, but I’d like to consider us friends, right?”

“Yes.”  Amanda agreed.

“Well, I can help you.  I can give you advice.  I’ve got lots of experience, okay?  You NEED some help, trust me.”

“Why do you say that?  How do you know that I haven’t had lots of experience, too?” 

“Please, girl.”  Marcy remarked.  “When was the last time you had sex?”

That question just about shocked the crap out of her innocent self and nearly knocked her right off the couch.  It left her astonished, speechless, and a little embarrassed because to answer it she’d have to admit that her last time, was never.

 “You’ve never been with a man, have you?”  Marcy finally asked after Amanda had failed to give her an answer.

“I don’t see how that’s any of your business.”   Amanda finally perked up.

“Look, it’s nothing to be ashamed of and I’m not trying to be nosey.  I just want to help you out, that’s all.”

“Okay, so maybe I’m not all that experienced.”  She finally admitted in a bit of a mumble.

“I’m gonna get right past the envy I feel you right now, because you don’t know how many times I’ve wished I could have mine back – my virginity that is.”  Amanda only looked at Marcy oddly, not sure exactly what the heck she was talking about.  Why would anyone want to take it back?  “Oh, and this hunk of a man is dying to help you out.  I am so jealous.”  Marcy continued.

“Marcy, you lost me.”  Amanda finally spoke up.

“Sorry, I was rambling.  Anyway, I’m not trying to put you down or anything, but did you plan on becoming a nun or something?”

“No, of course not.” 

“Are you saving yourself for marriage?”  It was obvious that Marcy just didn’t get it.  Amanda had never been given the opportunity, that’s why her innocence was still intact.

“No, not really.”

“You’ve had boyfriends, right?”  Marcy’s entire face had scrunched into the center of her head.   She was squinting and almost looking to be in some sort of pain because of Amanda’s inexperience.

“Just one, in college, but he wasn't very in to me.”  

Marcy took in a deep breath and slowly exhaled.  “Okay.  Boy, I was so right on the money on this one it’s scary.  I’m scaring myself.  This is too good.”

“What are you talking about?”  Amanda was now thoroughly confused thanks to the way Marcy had been carrying on.

“First thing, you have to loosen up.”  Marcy said.

“Funny, that’s what he told me this morning.”  Oops, that had slipped.  Without thinking Amanda slapped a hand over her mouth, wishing to scoop those words right back inside.

A complete look of shock fell over Marcy’s face.  “You saw him this morning?”

“Well, yeah.  We kinda ran into each other on the way in.”

“You kinda ran into each other on the way in?  Please, explain.”

“You know, I don’t really want to talk about it.  It’s kinda personal.” 

Marcy wasn’t buying it.  She glared at Amanda from the tops of her eyes with a look of pure irritation.   “You’re not gonna tell me?”

“Well, it’s not really that big of deal”  That was a lie, it was a huge deal to Amanda.  “He’s gonna call me later and we might hang out.”

“Oh, he SO wants you.” 

“I really don’t think it’s anything like that.”   Amanda remarked.  “He does have a girlfriend, you know.”

“Yeah, but he doesn’t like her or did you not notice that when they were shopping together the other day.” 

“Don’t be silly.  Of course he likes her.”  Amanda could only wish that Marcy was right, but that was the last thing she wanted to think about at the moment.  She’d much rather forget about that little tid bit.  

“It doesn’t matter, anyway.  So what are you going to wear?”  Marcy asked.

“When?” 

“Tonight, when you hang out or whatever.”

“I don’t know.”  That thought hadn’t even crossed her frazzled mind.  Besides the one pair of jeans she was wearing and a couple of sun dresses, which were out of season for late September, all she owned were business suits.

“Well, you better think of something besides all those stuffy suits you wear.”

“You know what?  You’re making a way bigger deal out of this than it is.  You’re acting like it’s a date.  It’s not.”  Amanda was beginning to get a little frustrated with all this planning and talking.  “Don’t you have a store to run?”

“Well, I can take a hint.”  Marcy stood up.  “You know where I am if you change your mind.”

“Thank you, I’ll remember that.”  Amanda told her and saw her to the door.  She had grown more than a little frustrated by Marcy's nosiness and insistence on helping her out.  That was not what she needed at the moment.

Immediately she fell back into her cleaning routine, hoping that the time would pass quickly.

Of course, it didn’t.  It moved at a snails' pace.  By one in the afternoon her condominium was spotless.  She had also re-alphabetized her CD collection, checked her e-mail at least a dozen times and ordered some books from one of her favorite web sites.    The realization stumbled upon her that without her job, she had no life whatsoever.  It was truly depressing.

By two o’clock, her energy had run out and she laid down to take a short nap.  Something she rarely did, but that little bit of sleep she had gotten the night before just wasn’t enough and she wanted to be fully alert when spending time with him.

It wasn’t too surprising that her dreams were filled with visions of JC.  Visions of him in very desirable situations.  In ways she didn’t even know she knew about.  Well, maybe she was just kidding herself with that thought.  But one thing she did know for sure, as she groggily woke from her nap, was that she wanted nothing more than to go back to sleep and continue with those delightful dreams.

But she didn’t.  She sat up, stretched and glanced at the hanging clock on the wall.  It was just after three p.m. and JC could possibly be calling her at anytime.  If he had fallen asleep by seven that would have given him a full eight hours of sleep.  That seemed like an average amount of sleep.  Of course, his job was so strenuous he probably needed more than the average amount. 

Just as she finally coaxed herself to get off the sofa and get moving again, there was a knock on her front door.  Immediately she thought of Marcy.  Oh, if she was back Amanda was going to scream.  She liked Marcy, she really did, but she wasn’t exactly keen on the idea of blabbing her whole life story to the girl.  Not today, anyway.   Besides, she didn’t want to share those precious moments she had spent with JC.  She wanted to keep them all to herself.

Completely expecting to see either her flighty friend or Ron, who would no-doubt be coming up to check on her because she had taken the day off, she was flabbergasted to find a very awake and well-put together JC standing in her doorway.

Flashbacks of those wonderful dreams snuck into her thoughts just like he had snuck up on her the day before in the dress shop – very quickly.  “JC.”  She said with surprise.  “Come in.”

“Hi.”  He grinned and waved at someone down the hall – Mike, she figured – then stepped inside her tidy apartment.  “Nice place.”  He said, glancing around the living room.

If you asked Amanda it was pretty plain and boring, especially compared to what he was probably used to, but it was hers nonetheless.  The walls were fairly bare, she only had a couple of pieces of art that her father had bought for her sometime back.  Amanda had considered them sympathy gifts because she had received them just shortly after her mother had passed away.  As if expensive artwork would make the pain go away.  There were no family pictures displayed.  Those were kept in a more private place, her bedroom.  “Thanks.  I thought you were gonna call.”

“Yeah, well… I decided to stop by instead.  I hope that’s okay.” 

“Of course.  Have a seat.”  She remarked, motioning towards the sofa she had just been sleeping so soundly on.  “Would you like something to drink?”

“Sure.  Whatever you’ve got is fine.”  He answered, still looking around as he sat down on the couch.

As Amanda pulled open her stainless steel refrigerator, she was reminded by her reflection that she had been wearing probably the last thing on earth she had ever wanted him to see her in – old, faded jeans and a t-shirt.  And it wasn’t even a nice t-shirt, it was yellow and a little dingy if you asked her.

Trying to forget about her clothing, she walked back to the living room with two glasses of lemonade and a curious smile across her face.  “So, did you sleep well?”  She asked as she took a seat on the opposite end of the sofa.  Amanda didn’t own a loveseat or even a recliner chair, only that couch.  It was either sit there or on the floor, which she did debate on for about half a second. 

“Yeah, pretty good actually.”  He answered after taking a sip of his drink.

“What about you?  What’d you do all day?”

Oh, dream about you… She could not wipe those images from her head no matter how hard she tried.  Then, of course, there was the memory of him standing shirtless a mere foot away from her.  She was getting flushed just thinking about it.  “Not a whole lot.  I did some cleaning and just hung around the house basically.”

“So, did you still wanna do something later?”  He asked, fingering the rim of his glass as he rested it on top of his knee.

“Yeah, sure.”  She answered just as cell phone chirped in his pocket. 

He grunted, set his lemonade on the coffee table, stood and took the call.

Amanda watched as he paced around her living room, stopping at the bookshelf while he talked on the phone.  His tone seemed a little irritated and it sounded like whoever was on the other end was discussing something work related.  He stopped at her CD collection and then turned to look back at her with a sly grin.  She wasn’t sure exactly what it meant, but when he looked at her that way it made her whole body turn numb. 

She tried not to stare, but with his back to her it was safe.   He looked absolutely amazing in just a casual pair of jeans and a white t-shirt that had some sort of writing on the front.  She couldn’t remember what exactly it had said because she was too busy concentrating on the rest of him.  He was wearing another hat today.  This one reminded her of something she might see on a trucker or something, although it wasn’t dirty or dingy.  It was new looking, just like everything else he wore.

And then there was the faint scent of his cologne.  She was beginning to recognize that wonderful scent.  Forever she would think of him when she smelled it because it would always be associated with him. 

Finally he ended his call and turned to her from across the room.   “You read a lot?”  He asked.

“Can’t you tell?”  She grinned.  She only had a huge floor to ceiling bookcase filled with a variety of different hard bound and paper backs, mainly hard bound.

“I do, too.”  He said, returning towards the sofa with both hands resting in his pockets.  “You have quite the eclectic CD collection.” 

“I like all types of music.”  She replied as he took his seat, this time much closer than before.  Just the thought that he was sitting on the very next cushion made her heart beat faster – a lot faster.

“I didn’t see any of our music.”  A devilish grin smoothed across his lips as he raised one eye brow just slightly higher than the other.

Amanda’s eyes instantly grew wide.  She had never even thought about that!  She hoped he wasn’t insulted.  “I… Uh… It’s not that, uh-“

Finally he interrupted.  “It’s okay.  You don’t have to explain.  I forgive you.”  He smiled and gave her knee a quick pat. 

There was that touch again.  That electrifying touch.  That touch that made her completely dumbfounded, and it seemed to be kicking in already because she had absolutely no idea what it was she had wanted to say.  But, God, how she loved the way it felt when he touched her.

JC was enjoying this way too much.  The look that came over her face when he touched her amused him to the fullest.  It was a combination of surprise and enjoyment.  He loved the way her words got all jumbled, and especially because it wasn’t his pop status that did it to her, it was just plain ol’ him.  There was a difference that he could plainly recognize.  Girls got tongue-tied around him all the time, but Amanda hadn’t been that way initially and she was used to being around people like him.  It was part of her job.  He made her nervous, and even though he wanted her to feel comfortable around him, it also struck him as completely adorable.  “So, here’s the plan.”  He told her.   “I’m leaving in about an hour and a half.”  He said, looking down at his sports watch.  “I should be back no later than 9:00.  Is that too late for you?”

“No, huh uh.”  Amanda replied, her pretty green eyes glued to him attentively.  That alone made him smile.

“I’ll try and get back before that, but I doubt it.  They’re probably going to try and talk me into going to something else afterward, but I won’t.  I promise.”

“If you have something else you have to do, I understand.”   She said.

“No, I don’t.  You already said that we could do something before I left, so it’s too late.  You can’t back out now.”  Taking in a breath, he twisted his torso sideways and rested one arm on the back of the sofa.

“Oh, I wasn’t going to.” 

“Good.”  He was also enjoying the fact that he seemed to have complete control over her.  Not that he was a controlling person, but she seemed so… he couldn’t even put a word to it.  All he knew was that she was letting him call all the shots.  He had some weird desire to show her the world and she almost gave the impression that she’d let him.  Almost.   He had seen that feisty side of her and was sure it would come back in an instant if necessary.

“So, what are we going to do?”  She asked curiously.  “I mean, did you have something in mind?”

Oh, did he… But that wouldn’t be happening, that’s for sure.  She would have to ask that question.  “I don’t know.  You live here, what’s there to do?”

“You know…” Her eyes dropped into her lap as she twirled her thumbs together.  “I don’t really get out that much.  I’ve pretty much devoted my whole life to this hotel.”

That thought really bothered him.  She was letting her whole life pass by and why?  Because her father wanted her to stay put, that’s why.  She hadn’t said so much, but just from that one meeting he summed it up right away.  If anyone seemed controlling, it was Jonathan Ballard.  “Amanda, you’re missing out on a lot just staying at this hotel all the time.   We barely know each other, but it’s pretty obvious to me and I hate to see you live like that.”

She looked at him as if he had summed up her whole life in a nutshell.  “You’re so right, and I know that.  I guess I’m just a homebody.”

He smiled genuinely.  “So I am.  When I actually can be.”  Tenderly he reached for her hand and held it softly in between his own.  “But not leaving here and devoting your whole life to this place, it just doesn’t seem healthy.”

Amanda looked away, but she let him keep her hand.  He studied her slender fingers, slowly tracing his own between hers.  With a sharp turn, she snapped her head back and stared at him with those pale green eyes of hers.  A thick piece of her auburn hair fell in front of her face and she used her free hand to push it aside.

“What happened to that girl that I saw playing the piano the other night?”  He asked, rubbing his thumbs into her palm.

“She’s still here.”  Amanda answered softly.

“I really like that girl.”

“Do you really like this girl?” 

He smiled widely as she slipped her hand from his grasp.   “Maybe.”  He said teasingly.

But he could tell by her expression that she wasn’t used to being teased that way.  “Oh.”

“I’m just playin’ with you.  Of course I do.”  He assured her.   “Don’t take everything so seriously, okay?  I wouldn’t be here if I didn’t like you.”  JC looked down at his watch and realized that he had to get going.  He didn’t want to leave.  He didn’t want to attend some stupid charity event.  He didn’t feel like getting all dressed up.  He just wanted to stay and get to know her.

“You have to go?”  Amanda asked, realizing that he was paying close attention to the time.

“I do.  But, I promise, we are going to finish this later.”  He assured her.

“Finish what?”

“This conversation and how come you never leave.”  He stood up, and held one hand out to guide her off the sofa.

She let him help her to her feet and stood just in front of him.  “JC?”  

“Yeah?”

“I know this is really none of my business, but…” She paused and then continued, “you know, never mind.”  She decided, waving the thought away with her hand.

Oh, but his curiosity was sparked.  There was no way he could leave without her finishing whatever it was she was going to say.  “What?  Tell me.”

“It’s just your…”

“My what?  Look...”  He said, placing both hands on her shoulders.  “You don’t have to be so shy around me.  You can ask me whatever.”

He watched as she took in a deep breath of air.  “It’s just your girlfriend.  Does she know that you’re spending time with me?  I mean, would she approve of that?  I don’t want to come in between your guys’ relationship.”

He nodded his head with understanding and rubbed one hand down his chin.  “Don’t worry about that.  I’m a nice guy, I promise.  My relationship with Jessie is very confusing right now.  I used to love her, I really did, but now it’s just – I don’t even know what it is.  Oh, here I am dishing out all my problems on you.”

“It’s okay.”

Knowing he really did need to leave, he glanced down at his watch one more time.  “I really do have to go.”

“I know.  I’ll see you later.”  She walked him to the door and he turned to face her one last time.

“We’ll just meet here?”  He asked.

“Sure, that’s fine.”  She agreed.

“I’ll call you on my way.”  Not thinking twice, he stepped forward and wrapped his arms around her, holding her in an embrace that seemed to last ten times longer than he had intended.  But the feeling of her soft curves against him sent his whole body into a dance of excitement inside.  Not to mention the clean scent of her perfume as it permeated it’s way into his nostrils.   Once he had held on, it was hard to let go, but after a brief minute, he managed to step away.

The look on her face was absolutely inviting, or maybe he just imagined it to be.  Either way, he wanted to stay.  He definitely wanted to stay, but instead he reached for the handle and opened the door.

“Bye.”  She spoke softly.

“See you tonight.”  He smiled and waved, noticing that Mike was just heading his direction.  What was it about her that got to him so badly?  He couldn’t figure it out, but there was no way he could deny it.  The feeling was too strong to ignore.

JC was gone now, but Amanda hadn’t moved an inch.  She could still feel the warmth of his arms around her, his chest pressing against the curve of her breasts, his heart beating against her – she ached to feel it all again.  One short hug had probably felt better than anything she had ever felt in her entire life.

Of course she had been hugged before, and not just by family members, either.  Her and Simon had done their share of “making out” so she did know a little bit about how things worked.  Obviously she never let it go all the way. 

That had been a strange time in her life.  Her mother had just been diagnosed with the cancer that inevitably ended up taking her life and Amanda was going through, what she calls, her rebellious stage.  That’s why she had gone out with Simon in the first place.  Even though he was studious and intelligent, her father never approved of him.  No one would ever be good enough for his daughter as far as he was concerned.

Maybe that’s why she had never found love, because she was always too afraid to look.  The few girlfriends she did have in college always told her she was blind when it came to men.  That they looked, she just never noticed.  Of course she never believed them.  But with this sudden turn of events, she was beginning to wonder.  Did it take the attention of a god-like pop star to make her realize that maybe she actually wasn’t so unappealing after all?

At any rate, she was approaching the realization that Marcy had been right.  Amanda needed some advice and preferably before her next get-together with JC.  With that in mind, she threw on her most casual beige skirt and a red, knit v-neck before heading down to the store to find Marcy, hoping her friend wouldn’t be too upset about the way she had acted earlier.

She was thankful to find Marcy behind the sales counter ringing up the only customer in the store, Mrs. Bitterman, an elderly woman that shopped there regularly.  Why?  Amanda had no clue when there were a dozen or more expensive retailers right down the street, but for some reason the white-haired lady seemed to like this one.

Mrs. Bitterman smiled genuinely at Amanda as the two passed through the door, the older woman leaving and Amanda making her entrance.

“Oh, so did you decide to work today, after all, or are you coming to apologize?”  Marcy asked stubbornly.

“I’m sorry, Marce.”  Amanda looked at her friend with the best pleading eyes she could muster.   “You’re right.  I do need you.”

Marcy smiled satisfactorily and rested one hand against her kicked-out hip.  “Well, finally you admit it.”

“When are you getting off?”  Amanda asked.

“At four.”  Marcy answered.

“Do you wanna come over and help me?  I promise I won’t yell at you again.”  Amanda asked earnestly.

“I guess so.  I don’t have any plans.”  Marcy agreed with a tiny smirk.  “But you owe me after this morning.”

“I know, I’ll make it up to you, I promise.”

“Lunch or something.”  Marcy continued.

“You got it.  I’ll buy you lunch tomorrow.”

“Deal.”

“So, I’m going to go to my office real quick and then you’ll meet me up at my condo?”

“Sure thing, sista,”  Marcy remarked with her trademarked sass.

“’K, see you in a little bit.”

“Bye,” Marcy called as Amanda headed out the door.  She was in such a hurry, and not paying much attention, that she ran right smack into Justin – literally, as in her forehead slammed into his chest.  And, she noticed, it was a rather nice chest, too.  Oh, but this was the wrong *NSYNCer to be having those thoughts about.

Immediately his bodyguards’ eyes were locked onto her.  She looked up at the overpowering man with an innocent stare before turning to Justin.  He was, after all, still a guest in her hotel.  “I am so sorry Mr. Timberlake.”  She took in a deep breath and continued.  “Are you enjoying your stay in our hotel, so far?”

He grinned with amusement.  “Very much, actually.”  He replied.  “You okay?”

“Yeah, I’m fine.”  She rubbed her forehead softly and contemplated the idea of making a comment about how hard his chest had been, but decided that was probably not too smart, considering.

“Good.”  He said, just as some girl shouted his name from across the lobby.  The hotel’s security staff was on it immediately, calming the over-excited fan down to a whisper.  “I’ll tell JC you said hi.  See ya later, Amanda.”  And with that he was gone.  Well, walking away with his monster of a security guard anyway.  Amanda stood there a little surprised and embarrassed.  It hadn’t been so bad when she had no idea that he knew who she was, other than she worked for the hotel, but when he made that subtle announcement – well, her cheeks undoubtedly turned a nice rosy shade of pink.  Thankfully he didn’t stick around to witness it.

More than a bit flustered, she headed for the elevator to make that stop at her office as planned.

Later that evening, after schmoozing with more people than he could count, JC settled down at a table beside two fourths of his band mates, namely Justin and Lance.  The other two were off mingling somewhere or other.  His watch read seven thirty and JC was already geared up to leave.  But that wasn’t an option just yet, so he sat down at the half-empty table and decided to eat the dessert that had been brought to him.

“So…”  Justin sounded as JC sat in the chair beside him, “I had a little run-in with the hotel manager this afternoon.”

Lance looked up from his piece of cake with a bit of confusion.   He was the last one to know about JC’s interest in Amanda and had no idea what Justin was referring to.  The only reason that Justin knew so much was because he was the one person that JC had confided in.  The others had their guesses, but that was about it.

“Is she hot or something?”  Lance asked, a little puzzled, before taking another bite of his dessert.

“She’s got JC written all over her.”  Justin remarked, raising his eyebrows for effect.

Those words struck a chord in him because they actually sounded pretty damn good.  He couldn’t have put it better.  But he opted to stay quiet and wait for Lance’s next remark, or inquiry.

“How come I don’t know anything about this?”  Lance asked, curiously glancing over at the man in question.

JC just shrugged.  He wasn’t denying the fact, but he wasn’t admitting it either.

“What about Jessie?”  Lance, not surprisingly, had to ask another question.  “Are you going to cheat on her again?”

JC calmly folded his napkin and placed it beside his near-empty dessert place.  “I thought we weren’t talking about that anymore?  How come that always gets brought up?”

“What?”  Lance asked naively.  “It’s not like she’s here.  Besides we all know you did it just so she’d dump you, but…” and he smirked before finishing, “she didn’t.”

“Thanks for reminding me.”  JC replied.  “And, if you must know, I’m not sure exactly what’s going on with Jessie and I.”

“Anyway,”  Justin interrupted, “she ran right into me coming out of that clothing store in the hotel.”

JC turned to him with glint of interest in his eyes, waiting to hear the rest of the story.

Justin, of course, continued.  “I think I might have embarrassed her a little because I mentioned that I’d tell you she said hi.”

Grinning widely, JC asked, “and what’d she say?”

“I didn’t stick around to find out.”  Justin remarked and shoved a bite of cake into his mouth.

JC let out a quiet laugh and looked back at his plate.  “I’m gonna see her later tonight,” he informed.

With that bit of information, Lance’s fork tumbled down onto the pristine white table cloth.  The other two men just looked at him oddly.  “What?” he asked, carefully scooping frosting off the table.

“Did you forget how to eat?”  Justin asked with a smirk.

“You alright, man?”  JC remarked.

“Yes, I’m fine.  It was an accident.  Okay?” 

“Here comes our waiter, I think he’s gonna make you finish eating in the back,” Justin joked.  Lance only responded with a roll of his light colored eyes.

It wasn’t long after that Justin left from the table to go talk with a mutual friend.  JC decided after a minute that he’d join him.  “Hey,” Lance said, as JC stood.

“Yeah?”

“Don’t forget we’re leaving pretty early tomorrow.”

“I know, man.  Thanks,” he remarked and met up with Justin across the room.

The next hour seemed to tip-toe by.  Once they were finished with the press, Justin was the first person to tell JC to get out of there.  So just after 8:30, he rounded up Mike and high-tailed it to the car, making the call to Amanda as soon as they were safely on their way.  He was a bit perturbed when her answering machine picked up.  A little disappointed, he left a message. ” Amanda, it’s JC.  I’m on way back to the hotel now.  I’ll try you again when I-“

“Hello?”  She finally picked up.

“Hey, it’s JC.”

“Sorry.  I just walked in the door.  I had a slight crisis in the lobby that I had to take care of, but it’s okay now.”

He could tell she was a little out of breath.  “What kind of crisis?”

“Do you really want to know?”  She asked, her voice sounding much more relaxed and confident over the phone.  It was a voice that intrigued him to the fullest.

“I don’t know, do I?”

“Let’s just say, there was a little scuffle between a younger girl and an older woman over some group I won’t mention,” Amanda explained.

“What?  You’re kidding?  What kind of scuffle?”

“I didn’t actually witness it so I can’t really say, but they were both escorted safely out of my hotel.  Along with a few others.”

“Man, there was action and I missed it.  No one got hurt did they?”

“No, unless you count a few hurt egos, but that’s about it.”

JC let out a throaty laugh and turned to Mike as he drove.   “Two fans got into it in the lobby.” 

“Hmmm, glad I wasn’t there,” was the only response the man had.

“Anyway,” he said, returning to his conversation with Amanda.  “We’re about – How far are we, Mike?”

“Ten minutes.” 

“We’re about ten minutes away,” JC told her,  “so, I’ll see you in fifteen.”

“Okay,” Amanda replied happily.  “See ya then.”

“Bye.”  He hung up the phone and slid it into his jacket pocket. 

Mike shook his head slowly, making an annoying clicking sound with his tongue.

“What?”  JC asked, realizing the man was obviously forming some sort of opinion.

“It’s not my place to say,” Mike answered.  His deep voice was enough to scare even the manliest of men, but JC was used to it.  Deep down the 300-plus pound man was as soft as a teddy bear – well, when he wanted to be.

“Just say it.  I won’t fire you, I swear.”

A laugh bellowed deep from his throat as he turned to glance at JC for only a brief second before returning his attention back to the road.  “I didn’t think you would,” he remarked.

“Well, what then?”

“Nothing.  You just got it bad for this girl.  I can tell.”

“Pshh,” JC sounded, looking away from the man and glancing out the side window at nearby traffic, “do not.”

His words had said one thing, but his tone had said something completely different.  “Yeah,” Mike rebutted with disbelief.

Oh well, JC wasn’t really too concerned about what other people thought.  If he was he wouldn’t have taken it as far as he already had.

Amanda tried convincing herself that she wasn’t nervous, but she was.  The advice Marcy had given earlier ran repeatedly through her brain, one piece she had used already.  “Don’t let him think you’re waiting by the phone,” Marcy had told her.  So when he called she had stretched the truth just a little.  The scuffle in the lobby wasn’t a lie, she just changed the time a bit.  Originally it happened an hour or so earlier.

“Don’t be nervous,” Marcy had stressed, “be confident.  Men like confidence.”  Amanda was confident when it came to her job at the hotel, but this was reasonably new territory and her confidence was lacking somewhat.  She was bound to try her best and fake it.

When his knock finally did land on her front door, she had to pep herself up during the entire ten second walk to open it.  She took a deep breath, noted how fast her heart was racing, and slowly turned the knob.

Then she nearly passed out.

Not only was he still dressed from his charity dinner and looking absolutely breathtaking in black suit and tie, he was holding one single-stemmed red rose, just for her.  The guy definitely knew how to get to a girl.  Everything he was doing was working.

He smiled, handed her the delicate bud and softly said, “for you.”

“Thank you.  You didn’t have to do that,” she remarked, trying desperately to wipe the silly grin she knew was plastered across her face, but he had that affect on her and it was hard to fight it.

“I know,” he replied. 

“Did you want to sit down?” she asked, gesturing towards the beige sofa.

“Sure.”

She followed him to the couch, her eyes gliding down his back while she was safe from being caught.  Flashes of their earlier meeting and his perfect abdomen flooded her mind.  She’d pretty much bet her life savings, which was pretty hefty, that this man looked good in just about anything he put on, as well as nothing at all.   That thought made her temperature rise in an instant.

Amanda shook those naughty thoughts away as they sat down.  “So, did you have something planned?”  She asked him.

“Did you?”  He asked with an inquiring smirk.

Oh, did she ever…  But she wasn’t that brave.  In fact, the mere thought made her giddy and a tiny giggle snuck its way out of her vocal chords.

Of course he wanted to know what she was so amused by.  “What?”

“Nothing,” she grinned. 

“Uh huh, that didn’t sound like nothing to me,” he smirked. 

Amanda only grinned more.  Did he even know what kind of affect he had on her?  She had a sneaking suspicion that he did.  How could he not?  Women get giddy over him all the time, she was sure of that, he had to realize when it was happening.

“So, how was your dinner thingy?” she asked, hoping to change the subject.

“Boring as hell,” he answered honestly. 

“Sorry to hear that.” 

“It’s okay.  It’s part of my job.  I’m used to it,” he answered, reaching up to loosen the tie around his neck.  “You mind if I use your restroom?” he asked her.

“Oh, no.”  She stood to show him down the dark hallway.  “It’s the second door to the left,” she pointed.

“Thanks.”

Amanda walked back into the living room and looked down at her delicately shaking hands.  “Don’t be nervous,” she whispered to herself softly, “you have nothing to be nervous about.”  She took in another deep breath and stopped to inspect her reflection in a wide mirror on the wall behind the sofa, her body adorned in the same beige skirt and red v-neck.  She had changed five times in between and somehow decided that everything else she owned was too stuffy.  Marcy had suggested she go shopping, but Amanda didn’t want to appear too differently.   She didn’t want him to think she was changing herself for him. 

After a minute he appeared from the hallway, Amanda was still leaning against the back of the sofa and checking herself out in the mirror.  Quickly she stood up and tried to pretend like she hadn’t been primping.

JC walked towards her, took off his jacket and laid it over the back of the sofa beside her.  “So, what should we do?” he asked, reaching for her hand.

“Um, I don’t know,” Amanda responded, allowing him to pull her a few steps towards him, but all the while realizing he was looking even more delicious without that coat and tie, and now, as he was only a step or two away, the clean scent of his cologne had clambered it’s way right up her nose and left her wanting to just eat him right up – well, sort of.

“You know,” he said, keeping a gentle hold of her right hand.  “I’m feeling a little overdressed.  I think I’m going to go change, if you don’t mind.”

“No, I don’t mind.”

“Good, you wanna come with me?” 

“Okay.”

“And then we’ll get the heck out of here.  Sound good?”

“Sure.” 

With that decision made, they were out the door.  Amanda was a little surprised when his bodyguard wasn’t lurking around the corner, waiting.  “Should you be just walking around without your bodyguard?” she asked as they neared the elevator at the end of the hall.

“As long as we don’t go down in the lobby I think I’ll be okay,” he remarked.

“If something happened to you, the hotel could be held responsible.  I mean, since you’re with me and we are in the hotel.  It’s kind of my job to keep guests safe, especially-“

“Amanda,” he cut her off, “don’t worry about it, okay?”  He told her before reaching to press the button for the elevator.

“You’re right, sorry.”

“I know you work way too much and that’s all you ever think about,” he said, “but do me a favor.  Tonight, don’t think about the hotel.  Okay?  Let’s just have a good time.”

His statement was partly correct, but lately she had thinking a lot about him so her mind wasn’t always focused on the hotel.  In fact, over the last two days the hotel had been the farthest thing from her mind, except for the fact that she was inside of it.

They stepped into the empty elevator and JC leaned against the back wall, his jacket strung through his arm as he rested one hand in his pocket.   It was a pose that was full-on sexy in a very big way.  Amanda stood a few steps away and tried not to stare, even though it had been difficult to take her eyes off of him in the first place. 

It was a quiet ride that lasted only a minute.  They stepped into the hall to immediately find Justin, three girls in their late teens, and one bodyguard.  Amanda realized that these fans had some sort of radar because it seemed they were locked on to that elevator before the doors even opened.  They didn’t scream or yell, they just eyed JC like he was a piece of meat and they were starving. 

JC turned to Amanda and grinned as he slipped both hands in his pockets and told her, “It’ll just take a couple minutes.”

“No problem.”

Amanda stood back a step or two and watched the interaction.   There were autographs, a couple pictures, and of course hugs all around.  But JC didn’t hug those girls like he had hugged Amanda.  Or maybe she was just hoping there had been more to hers, but hugging those three fans seemed more mechanical than when he had hugged her. 

Finally Justin’s huge bodyguard saw the girls to the elevator and JC and Amanda continued towards his suite, Justin following closely behind.  “So, what’s the plan tonight, kids?” he asked.

JC looked back at his friend with a smirk.  “Don’t know.  You?”

“Ah, I’m waiting for Joey and Lance to get back so we can go clubbin’.  Interested?”

“I think we’ll be doin’ our own thing.  Thanks,” JC responded. 

Interesting choice of words, Amanda thought.  Doing their own thing?  Hmmm…  She wondered exactly whatthing they would be doing.  God, she was pitiful.  Here she was, the one that had told him she wasn’t the type of girl to have some sort of fling, or whatever, and now that’s all she could think about!  She was loosing her mind, that’s all there was to it.  Her mind was completely gone.

“So… how’s your head, Amanda?” Justin asked.  “My rock hard chest didn’t bruise up your pretty little forehead now, did it?”

Alright, with that statement – teasing or not – she took back the thoughts about how nice his chest had been.  He didn’t deserve those thoughts from her, not now.  But Amanda was too sweet to snap back, so instead she glanced at him over her shoulder and said, “it’s fine.  Thanks.”

Justin let out an amused laugh.  “You’re funny.” 

Amanda wasn’t quite sure how she had been funny, but… okay. 

“Well, I’m this way,” he announced, pointing to a hallway that veered towards the right.  “See ya.”

JC and Amanda both said good bye before being left alone once again. 

“Did he tell you how I ran into him earlier?”  Amanda asked as JC slid his key into the lock on his room door.

“Yeah, he mentioned it at dinner,” JC answered nonchalantly as they stepped inside his dark suite.  He flipped on a light and tossed his expensive jacket onto a chair.

“You know, I’m not usually so disorganized.  I’m usually way more together than I have been over the past few days.  I don’t know what’s wrong with me,” she told him.

“I saw your bathroom, Amanda.  You don’t have to explain to me,” JC remarked as he sat down to untie his shiny black shoes.

She didn’t get it.  He saw her bathroom?  What did that have to do with anything?  A little confused, she had to ask, “huh?”

“Yes, your bathroom,” he repeated, looking up from his hunched over position.  “I saw how neat it is.  You’ve even got the labels lined up on your hair stuff.”

“You noticed that?” she asked with surprise.

“Yep.  I noticed that you are a very organized person.  You also have your CD’s in alphabetical order.”  He slid out of both shoes and stood up a good half an inch shorter than he’d been before, but that still put him a good five inches over Amanda.

“Well, how could you find what you wanted if they weren’t?”  Automatically she felt the urge to defend her anal condition of being such a highly organized person, but really she knew he wasn’t insulting her.  He had merely been stating the obvious.

“I guess it just takes longer,” he said with a grin.   “I’m gonna go change.  I’ll be right out,” he told her.

“Okay.”

Amanda slowly spun around on her heels, waiting while JC was off stripping down to his skivvies in the next room.  That thought alone made her stomach dip with excitement as if she had just dropped off the highest peak of her favorite roller coaster. 

She wandered around the room aimlessly.  There wasn’t a whole lot to look at.  Not too many of his things were left out for her to glance over.   She imagined he kept those things in the bedroom.  There was a shopping bag sitting beside the sofa, but all that was left inside was an empty shoe box.

When he finally reappeared, he looked much more comfortable.   The kind of comfortable that made Amanda want to reach out and grab him and squeeze him as tight as she possibly could.  Of course, those type of impulses were shoved aside and ignored.

He sat down beside her on the sofa, pulled one knee up and turned in her direction.  “Now that I feel much more myself,” he said, “we have a conversation to finish.”

“We do?”  Amanda asked, noticing that he was incredibly close to her.  So close, that she could smell the fresh scent of toothpaste on his breath.

“Yes, you were going to tell me why you spend so much time working?”

“Oh.  Well, I don’t know.”  She really didn’t know how to put that answer into words. 

“Alright, I’m gonna let you slide for now, but we will discuss this tonight,” he told her.  “Mike’s on his way to pick us up and then we’ll get out of here.  If that’s okay with you?”

“Of course.”

“Good.”  He grinned and playfully grabbed on to her index finger.  Her breath stopped short, even if he was only touching one finger.  It didn’t matter.  It was still a touch.

He dropped her finger and slid his leg off the sofa, sitting straight forward before leaning his elbows on his knees.  “You really don’t get out enough, Amanda,” he commented after a second, glancing at her from the side.

Boy, that was the understatement of the century.  “I guess not.”

He chuckled and looked forward again.  “So much we don’t know about each other Amanda and so little time to learn.  You don’t have a curfew now, do you?” 

He was teasing and for once she picked up on it.  “No, of course not,” she replied.

“That’s good,” he turned to her again and winked, “because my days are all screwed up, so I’ll be awake for awhile.  Although, I could always sleep if I really tried.”  It was more like he was commenting to himself rather than her.   Either way, she was thoroughly enjoying just sitting beside him on the sofa and she would happily just sit there for the rest of the night if that’s what he wanted.  She didn’t dare think about the fact that once morning came around there’s a chance that she might never see him again.

©2001 BrandyRae

Sneaking into the movie theatre with JC and his bodyguard was probably the strangest thing Amanda had ever done.  Not that they snuck in without paying.  It was more like sneaking in through the back door and being escorted up to the balcony where no one could see them. 

Amanda rarely went to the movies in the first place – not anymore, anyway.   It was something she used to do with her mother when she was young.  In fact, many times they had gone to the very same theatre.  Although, this was her first time ever sitting in the balcony.  She had never even known how to get to it until now.

Sitting beside him in the dark brought on a combination of many feelings, mainly feelings of enjoyment and excitement with a mix of fluttering butterflies in her tummy.  The movie was a comedy, which she was thankful for because she’d never had much of a stomach for horror films and she definitely wasn’t in the mood for some depressing drama. 

The two laughed together and even shared a bag of popcorn, but the weirdest thing of all was Mike sitting just a few seats over.  Amanda had never considered their time together a date, but JC made it feel that way – only with a chaperone standing close by.  It wouldn’t have been so strange if she didn’t feel like such an imposter when Mike was around, but the vibe he gave off made her just a little uncomfortable. 

As much as she enjoyed bumping hands with JC in the popcorn bag, she was anxious for the movie to end so they could return to her comfort zone – the hotel.

The movie was nearly to its close when Mike got up to use the restroom, leaving the two briefly alone.  Amanda breathed a sigh of relief and sunk deeper into her chair.  Just when she felt a little more at ease, JC latched onto her arm causing her to nearly jump right out of her skin.  “What’s the matter?  Did I scare you?”   He leaned in close and Amanda pushed herself up straight in the chair.

She only took in another deep breath as a response. 

“We’ve got a good five minutes before he comes back.  You wanna make out?”  His tone was so devilish that Amanda knew he was trying to get a reaction out of her.  Little did he know how tempting that offer actually was.

“Are you serious?”  She asked with surprise.

“Only if you were going to say yes.”  Her eyes somewhat focused in the dark, she could see the cheesy grin across his face and it was incredibly contagious, or maybe it was just his playful nature that made her want to smile so badly.

“You’re assuming that I would say no,” she, instead, shot back.

“Pretty much, yeah.”

If that’s the way he wanted it, she thought, and turned forward to finish watching the movie.  But his stare was burning a hole through the side of her head and she was trying hard not to smile and give him that satisfaction.

“Amanda...”  Her name seemed to just roll off his tongue in a quiet, yet seductive whisper.  His lips were dangerously close to her ear and his breath was beating down her neck, causing a billion tiny goose bumps to form all over.  Not to mention the luring scent of him.  That trademark scent of clean soap and that dangerous cologne he wore, whatever brand it was.  She didn’t know, she only knew it smelled absolutely wonderful.

Taking in another deep whiff, she didn’t answer his call, only turned to gaze at him beside her.

Slowly one hand crept to touch her cheek and his face inched even closer than before.  “Don’t run away, okay?” he whispered, his fingers delicately tracing across her flushed skin.  Her eyes fell closed, knowing what was coming – she’d be a fool not too after that hint.  

But when his lips meshed softly to hers it was as if her entire being melted right out of her skin and slid to the floor in a puddle of mush.  Inside, the desire she felt swirled and swished as her heart pounded in her chest, shooting her pulse right off the charts.

With one taste of his buttery sweet lips, the yearning she had already been fighting off increased about five hundred times –if not more.

After too brief of an encounter, he pulled back just enough to catch her reaction. 

Amanda hesitated to open her eyes.  She was hoping that he’d come back for another.  No such luck.  Finally, she dared to look at him.

“You’re not running?” he said with a pleased smile.

“Should I?” 

“Mmmm, I don’t think so,” he answered just before pressing his near-perfect lips to hers for a second bout.

This time sparks flew.  Fireworks went off.   You name it, she felt it. 

Growing a little bolder, she grabbed onto his arm – a handful of bulging muscle – and the kiss deepened.  The tender touch of his tongue brushing ever-so-gently across her lips nearly sent her over the edge.  She opened up to him, gripping onto his arm even tighter, and let him venture into her world. 

It saddened her that it didn’t last nearly long enough.  He pulled away and she was left utterly speechless.

JC gave her a playful wink, traced his thumb alluringly over her still-parted lips and spoke softly.  “Close your mouth.  Mike will be back any second.”

Her heart racing incredibly fast, she turned back in her chair, faced the screen and sank even deeper into the seat. 

In less than five minutes time he had totally rocked her world.

After the theatre cleared out, JC and Amanda climbed into the back seat of their chauffeured SUV.  Amanda was still in a daze after the kisses they’d shared.  She could still taste him on her lips and if she closed her eyes really tight, she could almost relive those moments over and over again.  Never had she experienced kisses like that.  Nothing had ever felt so good.  She didn’t even dare imagine what it would feel like if things went even further.  She wondered if she’d even be able to recover from an experience like that.

Delicately JC slid his hand into hers as it rested on the seat between them.   Amanda looked over at him and he smiled genuinely.  “Tired?” he asked quietly.

“No, not really.  Are we going back to the hotel?”

“Yeah,” he answered, lightly tickling her palm with his fingertips.   “That’s okay, right?  I know you’re worried that there might be some late night crisis or something that you’re missing.”

“Ha, ha.  Very funny.”   She smirked.

“We still have to finish that conversation.  Are you ready?”

“No,” she answered honestly.

“Ah, come on.  You can talk to me,” he remarked, his voice on the verge of a whine.

“JC,” she spoke softly, “I hardly know you.”

“I keep forgetting that,” he said with a goofy grin.  “Don’t worry, that’ll change.”

He seemed so positive about that, Amanda had to wonder exactly how factual that statement actually was.

They made it safely inside the hotel, through a back entrance of course, and Mike escorted them up to JC’s suite.  Amanda wasn’t sure exactly what the plan was next, but she had forced herself not to question it.  For once in her life she was planning on just going with whatever.

Mike led the way to JC’s door and didn’t even turn when he said goodbye, he just kept walking.  JC opened his door and Amanda followed him inside.  “He doesn’t like me,” she said.

“He’s just cranky.  Ignore him.”  JC told her.   “Besides, it doesn’t matter if he likes you.  What matters is if I like you.”

“Oh… okay.”  Amanda remarked with sarcasm.

“Finally,” JC huffed, “you’re loosening up.  Thank God.”  His teasing made her smile.  It took a little while to get used to it, but she realized now that it was only a part of his playful nature, a side of him she thoroughly enjoyed. 

Casually he reached for her wrist and pulled her into his arms.  Almost automatically she sank against him, enjoying every firm contour of his fit frame.  He rested his chin on top of her head as she nuzzled her cheek against him, his inviting scent surrounding her and teasing her senses. 

“I know this probably seems really strange to you, Amanda,” he said.  “Believe it or not I’m usually not like this.  I’m actually a very private person and I’m definitely not the flirt of the group.   Well, I suppose I can be at times, but not usually.  Anyway, I just don’t want you to think that this is something I do all the time.  You hear all those stories about rock stars and stuff, and it’s really not like that with us.  We’re not like that, any of us.”

Amanda remained quiet, thoroughly enjoying the subtle movements of his body against hers.  The feeling of his chest pressing against her own with every breath and his hands lightly stroking down her back as he spoke.  With her arms curled around his waist, she could have easily stayed in that position for a very long time.

After a quiet minute, he leaned back and looked down at her face as she peered back up at him.  “It’s after midnight, I’m leaving in seven hours and I still have to pack.  Did you want to help me pack or should I walk you back to your place?” he asked.

“Do you really need help?”  She asked in reply.

“Not really,” he grinned, “but you can watch.”

“Okay.”

Stepping out of the embrace, he held on to her hand and guided her to the bedroom.  “I promise this will be just innocent packing going on in here,” he assured her.

“I’m gonna trust you on that,” she remarked with a grin. 

“Good.”  He sat her down on the bed and took a step back, looking at her curiously.  “You want a blanket?  You look a little cold.” 

Only if he would be her blanket…

Oh, there were those darned naughty thoughts again.  “No, I’m okay,” she answered.

“You sure?”

“Yeah.”

“Let me know if you change your mind.  These suites come with all that stuff, you know?  Extra blankets, extra pillows… you name it, and it’s here.”

Amanda had to chuckle because, obviously, she did know that. 

“And I’m telling you all that why?” he remarked more to himself than to her. 

“I don’t know,” she giggled.

“Don’t laugh at me,” he threatened, “you don’t even want to know what happened to the last person who laughed at me.”  There was that playful side again.  It was a side of him that she found completely irresistible.  In fact, if she’d been just a little more brave, she’d have tackled him right there, on the spot.

“Is that a threat?” she asked instead.

“Very much so,” he answered with a wink and moved to the closet where he pulled out a big black suitcase.  “Okay,” he said as he unzipped the heavy thing, “don’t look at how messy I am.  You’re probably wanting to pull your hair out at how unorganized I am, but it’s tough when you’re away from home seventy-five percent of the year, okay?”

“I wasn’t gonna say anything,” she defended.

“Just as long as we’ve got that straight,” he grinned up at her as he knelt on the floor beside his luggage.

They chatted as JC packed, mostly about him.  He explained to her things about his lifestyle and how hectic it was.  He also talked a little about the other guys and their different personalities.  In all honesty, she was thoroughly enjoying everything he was dishing out, but she knew it was only a matter of time before the subject of her would come up again.

Sure enough, as he laid out his clothing for the following morning – which was only five or six hours away – and finished packing, he asked her again why it was she let the hotel take up all of her time.  But that was a question she just couldn’t answer, no matter how hard she tried.

“I really don’t know how to answer that,” she admitted.

He looked at her with those gorgeous blue eyes and held out one hand.  “Come on,” he said, “I should walk you back.  Besides, watching you try and sit comfortably in that skirt is making me uncomfortable.”

Amanda just looked at him funny, but took his hand nevertheless.  He was ready to call it a night and even though she was disappointed, she wasn’t very surprised.  It was after one in the morning.

The ride in the elevator was quiet.  And the walk down the endless hallway to her apartment was quiet.  JC wasn’t sure what he was doing.  He knew he should be telling her goodbye, but he hadn’t done it yet and there was an enormous part of him that was dying to ask if he could hang out at her place for a little while.

He had enjoyed the time he’d been spending with her more than any time he could remember.  Not to mention the fact that he was just aching to kiss her again.  Of course, a good night kiss would be the perfect opportunity, but that would mean saying good bye and he just wasn’t ready.

As they approached her door, he threw out the most obvious hint.  “So, did I keep you up too late?  Are you ready to just collapse, or what?”

“No, not really,” she answered, “I’m actually a night owl.  I always stay up late.”

“Me too.”  But, of course, that’s just what he was used to.  He’d kill for a normal nights sleep at times. 

“So… did you wanna come in for a minute?  You probably need to get some sleep though, huh?”  Her tone gave her away.  She was feeling exactly the same as him and he could tell it had been difficult for her to ask.

“No, I’ll come in,” he agreed with a smile. 

“Oh, okay.”  She unlocked the door and JC followed her inside.  Not one light was turned on and as Amanda reached for the switch on the wall she brushed her arm against his chest.  “Oops, sorry,” she grinned shyly, as if she had hurt him in some way, the soft light illuminating her face.  But it wasn’t like she had punched him and if it had hurt it wasn’t in the way she was thinking.   Oh no, this kind of hurt was more like an ache and it sank much deeper than his chest.

He just grinned it off. 

“So, are you thirsty or anything?” 

“Actually, I’m kinda hungry.  You got anything to snack on?”  He asked.  Immediately her face lit up with delight.  He wasn’t sure if it was because he had implied he would stay for a little while or because she was hungry, too.

“Oh, I’ve got lots of stuff,” she answered and headed straight for the kitchen.  He followed, watching with wide eyes.  She opened up a cupboard and started naming stuff off.  Then she stood on her tippy-toes to open an even higher cabinet.  JC was so lost in a trance, staring at her curves, no doubt, that he nearly forgot he should have been offering to help. 

Finally he stepped in and reached up from behind her for the box of crackers she was trying so desperately to reach.  In the process, his body pressed up against her back and a fierce heat shot straight through his veins, igniting every nerve ending in his body. 

Leaning into the curve of her backside was not what he had intended, but once he was there it was difficult to move away.  She seemed to fit so perfectly against him in every way, shape and form.  And before he even realized it, he had braced one hand delicately against her slim waist.

Amanda froze when she felt him behind her.  It was a good thing he had grabbed that box because she was just about to drop it.     The warmth of his touch was sending tingly sensations up and down and all over her body.  She closed her eyes for a second, took in how wonderful it all felt and then slowly turned around.  “Thanks,” she grinned.

Taking a step back, he looked at her as if nothing remotely physical had just happened.  “No problem,” he said and set the box on the counter.  But Amanda just stared at him.  She had no words to speak, no thought other than, God, this man is absolutely gorgeous and if he touches me again I think I will either die or faint – and she had no idea what to do next, but she new she had to do something.

She leaned against the counter and thought of every move possible – grabbing, kissing, full-on attacking him? – oh, she really was at a loss for a lot of things at that moment, her sanity included.

“So, you wanna watch a movie or something?” he asked after a second.  

“Oh, okay.” 

He’d be staying?  This meant he’d be staying for another couple of hours.  Oh, that made her happier than she’d ever expected.  “I’ll bring out the snacks,” she told him.

“Sounds good,” he turned to walk out of the kitchen, took a couple of steps and then turned back around.  “Oh, no popcorn, k?  Once a night is enough for me.”

Amanda grinned in agreement.  “Me too.”

“Hey,” he spoke in a softer voice, stepping even closer to her, “aren’t you tired of wearing that?  I mean, don’t you just wanna relax?  Don’t feel like you have to stay all dressed up for me.  I’d be dying by now in that skirt.  Well, not that I’ve ever worn one, but I can imagine.”

That thought hadn’t even crossed her mind, but now that he brought it to her attention, it would be nice to sit in something a little more comfortable.  Luckily she had just bought a couple of new pairs of warm-up pants that she hadn’t even broken in at the gym yet. 

“I’m not trying to get you out of your clothes, I swear,” JC continued after Amanda failed to respond.

“Oh.  I know,” she said, “I’m just so used to dressing this way.  I didn’t even realize, but I guess you’re right.  I mean, I can change.  If you want me to, that is.”  Her words were all jumbled again.  Along with her thoughts.  Damn, she had been doing so well and now she was acting all stupid again.  If only he hadn’t pressed against her that way.  It totally shot her concentration all to hell.

“I just want you to be comfortable,” he said.  “And, since I kind of invited myself to stay – I don’t want you to – “ well, frankly, it would be just too easy to smooth his hands over her legs and who knows what else if she didn’t change her clothes.  They would be sitting on the couch together, since she only had one sofa.  And more than likely they’d end up sitting fairly close, if he had it his way.  It would just be much safer if she was wearing sweats or something, from his standpoint, anyway.

“You don’t want me to what?” she asked after he stopped mid-sentence and never bothered to finish.

“Huh?” he hadn’t even realized he forgot to finish.  Man, what was this woman doing to him all of the sudden?

“You said you don’t want me to, and you didn’t say what.  Oh, and you didn’t really invite yourself,” she added, “I asked you to come in, remember?”

Shaking his head back in to reality, he agreed, “right. “

Amanda just looked at him funny.  “I’ve got a bunch of movies in that cabinet underneath the TV if you want to pick something.”

“Okay,” he agreed, half-dazed, and went back to the living room.

Oh, what the hell has gotten into you JC? he asked himself.  The girl was rubbing off on him.  Now he was acting all goofy when before she had been the one getting tongue-tied.  Did one rub against her ass make you loose your mind, or what?

The movie idea may not have been such a good one.  Only because he found himself getting pretty sleepy and from the looks of it, so was Amanda.  Of course, her leaning into him wasn’t so bad.  Neither was his arm wrapped over her shoulder.  But his heavy eyes – now, they were bad.  He didn’t want to fall asleep.  He didn’t want to leave the next morning.  And he didn’t want to think about the chance of him never seeing her again.

Granted, that was all up to him.  If he really wanted to see her again, he could.  Unless, of course, she refused to see him, again.  Although, he couldn’t really fathom that happening.  She seemed to like him quite a bit. 

But the truth was, come tomorrow, this false reality would be over and it would be back to all things normal – mainly Jessie.  He didn’t even want to think her name while sitting so comfortably next to Amanda.  Not that he didn’t care for Jessie anymore, he just didn’t want to be with her. 

Which, of course, was part of the problem.  She had given up everything for him and he felt too guilty to break her heart because of it.  Her life had pretty much been on pause for him, so she could be there for him.

How he ever let that happen?  He had no clue.  How stupid was that?  Letting her give up everything to travel around and be with him.  Maybe that was why he resented her so much.  Maybe that’s why he didn’t even enjoy her company anymore.  Maybe that was the reason for so many things he was feeling.

But it wasn’t why he was feeling so drawn to Amanda.  That much he knew for sure.  He genuinely liked this girl.  More so than he had for anyone in a very long time. 

She nuzzled her head against his shoulder and he wondered if she was still awake.  “You asleep?” he asked her softly.

She responded with a soft “Hmmm, mmmm,” and just the sweet sound of her voice made him ache in the most needing parts of his body.

But he had to laugh quietly at her sleepiness.  Playfully he traced the side of her head with his fingertips.  “Was that a yes or a no?” he asked.

“Both.”

Cupping her chin gently with one hand, he nudged her to look up at him.  “That’s not possible,” he said.

She only peered up at him with sleepy eyes.  He smirked softly to himself and tenderly placed his lips to her forehead.   A gesture that would assume he had known her for a very long time.  One that would imply they were close and knew everything about each other.  Strange, that wasn’t the case, but he still felt the same.

“I should probably go,” he told her.

“JC?”  When she spoke his name in that soft sultry voice of hers, he knew he’d give her anything she asked for.  

“What?”  he asked in reply, speaking equally as quiet as her.

“What happens now?”

“What do you mean?”  He knew what she meant, but for some reason he wanted her to be more specific.  Maybe he just wanted to hear that she cared.

Amanda sat up straight and stretched, her legs stiffening out in front of her and her socked-toes reaching for the edge of the glass-topped coffee table.  “You know, after you leave,” she continued, looking up at him with awakening eyes.

“What do you want to happen?”  he asked quizzically.

She stared up at him, a little discouraged.  “Me?”

“Yes you,” he clarified with a grin.  As if he had been referring to someone else.  “Who else?”

“I don’t know.”  She glanced down at her feet and then once again at him.  “What do you want to happen?” 

“I asked you first,” he smiled.  For some odd reason, he loved messing with her this way.

After a second or two of her not responding, he nudged her playfully in the knee.   “Because, you know, you have gotten off pretty easy tonight.  We never did talk about you and why you spend so much time at the hotel and all that.”

Her stare drifted off to her lap or her feet once again.  Anything, it seemed, to avoid making eye contact with him.  Why was that such a difficult subject for her?  He was so curious about it, but at the same time he didn’t want to force her to talk to him in any way.  What he wanted was her to feel comfortable enough on her own to talk to him. 

“I know,” she finally said, her voice calm and a bit unsure, “and it’s not that I don’t want to talk about it.  I just don’t know what to tell you.  I mean, it’s just kind of how things have ended up for me.  It’s not really a bad thing.”

“I’m sorry if I’m being pushy,” he told her, “I just like you and I want to know more about you.”

With that she grinned.  A smile that made her whole face light up.  “I like you, too,” she agreed.

“So, you want to know if we’re ever going to see each other again, right?  Is that what you were asking?”

“Pretty much, yeah.”

“Did you want to see me again?”

She rolled her eyes, obviously realizing that he was trying his best to torment her.  “What do you think?”

“Personally, I don’t see how you could NOT want to see me again,” he responded with a cocky smile.

“Oh, please…” she smirked, having grown some sort of immunity to his sarcasm.

“Please?” he asked devilishly.

Amanda only looked at him curiously, obviously clueless to what he was about to do.   She had to have been because he hadn’t even expected it himself.  But he did it, and in a matter of one whole second his lips were crashing down against her more soft, pouty ones – and they felt incredible.

She clutched onto him, her hands reaching for his arms as if she was afraid to touch him anywhere else.  Oh, but he wanted her touch him other places – every other place to be exact. 

Gently he held onto her neck, tracing his thumb over her delicate jaw line as his mouth covered hers with hunger.  His kisses screamed something much more desirable, but he wanted her to make the next move and it just wasn’t happening.

Teasingly he trailed one finger down her neck, stopping abruptly as it hit the collar of her t-shirt.  Oh, and he had asked her to change.  Look where that had gotten him.

“Amanda…” he breathed her name in between prolonged, sensual kisses and she only moaned in response.  For some reason, he just loved to say her name.  “I’m going to call you tomorrow,” he finally spoke quietly.  Hating to brake away, but knowing it was necessary.

“Okay,” she said breathily.

“I’m gonna go now, really,” he had said it, but for some reason he found himself inching towards those tasty lips again.  They were just so damn soft… and shapely… and lusciously sweet.   Oh man, was he in trouble.

“I thought you were leaving?” she asked with a giggle as he freed her mouth just enough to let the noise slip through those soft, shapely, sweet lips.

“I am,” he answered, defying his words and kissing her again, and again, and again.

“JC,” she pressed her palms to his chest and pushed him back just enough to make him stop, but her tone was still filled with enjoyment.  She may have been telling him to stop, but it wasn’t because she hadn’t liked what was going on.

“Sorry,” he said, grinning sheepishly.  “I’ll just put my shoes on and go now.”

“It’s not that I want you to go,” Amanda made clear.  “It’s just that you’re leaving in a few hours and you should probably be in your hotel room when whoever comes to wake you up or do whatever it is they do.”

He chuckled, amused by her thinking.  “You’re right,” he agreed, although that wasn’t exactly how it worked, but close enough.

“But I will let you call me tomorrow,” she told him.  “If you want to.”

“I said I would,” he remarked as he tied his shoe laces.

It was only a minute or two later that she was walking him to the door, hugging him goodbye and kissing him one last time.  Oddly enough, he wasn’t too upset about leaving.  Actually, he felt rather good.  He was going to make it a point to see her again – and soon.  This wasn’t good bye, just a ‘see ya real soon.’  

He would make a point of it.  In fact, he already looked forward to calling her the next day.  Actually, that was about the only thing he was looking forward to.

©2001 BrandyRae

Chapter 9 

Amanda felt like she had bricks tied to the bottom of her eyelids as she sat at her desk the next morning. 

But it had been worth it… so worth it.  Even if she never saw him again, it had been worth it.  She hoped to God that shewould see him again.  But if not, she was sure she would come out a much stronger person because of it.

Oh, who was she really trying to fool, anyway?

She’d be really upset if he never called.  There was no doubt about it.  But there was no need to worry because he’d promised he would.  And he seemed like the type of guy that kept his promises.   She thought.  Or hoped.  Okay, she was keeping her fingers crossed.

He just seemed so everything to her.  And the way he kissed her.  Oh! The way those lips felt on her mouth – they were sure to fill her dreams for the rest of her lifetime.  And then some…

But today, she had to quit thinking about JC and get back to work.   Life had to go on and she had to remind herself that she did have a hotel to run and could not spend the entire time daydreaming about him.  Only once or twice or every five minutes could she do that.

Yep, she was in really big trouble.

Sitting across from Marcy at lunch was way too much.  The three cups of coffee Amanda had earlier hadn’t done a whole lot except give her a little bit of a stomach ache.  And, she was still exhausted to boot.  Of course, Marcy was going on and on about some mystery man that was in the store earlier that morning.  You’d never believe the woman was close to forty by the way that she talked.  She almost sounded more like a horny teenager.

One thing Amanda was thankful for, Marcy hadn’t asked one question about her night with JC – yet.  She was sure the woman was just dying to know every juicy detail, but was trying her best to keep her composure.

She had mentioned how tired Amanda looked – well, duh – and Amanda was sure it had been meant as a hint, but she wasn’t quite ready to take the bait. 

Finally, after another hint or two thrown in during their conversation, Marcy just down right asked the question.  “So, are we going to be seeing that sexy, hunk of a man again or what?”

Amanda took one last bite of her over-priced gourmet salad and let her fork rest just inside the glass bowl.  “He said he’d call me,” she revealed.

“Ooh, like when?  Did he say when he’d call?”  Marcy seemed to be more excited than Amanda was about the whole matter. 

Glancing across the table at her friends’ flighty grin and buoyant blond locks, she breathed in another gasp of air.  “Today.  He said he’d call me today.”

Then she braced herself for the reaction.

“Ooh!” Marcy screeched with excitement and leaned in, across the table.  “Did you guys, you know, do it?” she asked in a much more quiet tone.

“No.”  Amanda answered abruptly, a little surprised Marcy would think she would be so easy.

“What?  There wouldn’t be anything wrong with it if you had.  This is the new millennium, you know.  And women have needs too.  You have needs, Amanda.  I know you do.”

“Alright already.  Enough about my needs, jeez.”  Amanda remarked with a roll of her heavy eyes.

After finishing up lunch, the two ladies headed out to Marcy’s sporty silver convertible and the two headed back to the hotel.  As she started the engine and the radio came whispering out of the speakers, Amanda realized it was a song that she really liked.  “Oh, I love this song, turn it up,” she told her friend.

Marcy did as she said, glanced at Amanda with a strange grin and remained quiet the entire length of the song.

But as soon as it was over, she turned down the stereo and glanced over at Amanda with a chuckle.  “You know who sings that, right?”

“Huh uh,” Amanda answered nonchalantly, “I’m not sure.   I just love it.  It’s so soulful.  I think it’s called ‘Gone’ or something like that.”

Marcy nearly burst into laughter, “Jeez girl, I think you live in a bubble.”

Amanda just peered at her with confusion as they pulled into the hotels parking garage. 

“It’s them.  Them?  As in, your man’s group – them.”

Amanda’s eyes grew wide and she felt like a complete idiot.  “Oh God, them?”

“Yes, them.”  Marcy repeated.

“Oh God,” Amanda said once more, this time with an exhilarating gasp of air, “that’s them?”  Suddenly she came to the realization that they sounded incredible.  “Is that him singing?”

“No, dear,” Marcy answered, “that would be Justin.   Yep, that young hunk is more than just eye candy.  He is down right talented.  All of them are, actually.  Including your man, who usually sings the leads, as well.”

“Marcy?” Amanda asked with confusion, “how do you know all this?”

Her friend chuckled as she parked the car and turned off the engine.   “Hello?  My twelve year old daughter, Jessica, remember?  Besides, those boys have grown on me.  Actually, they’re not boys anymore.  Oh, she’d kill me if she heard me talking this way.”

Amanda was just down right in awe over that song.  Huh, just down right in awe, period.  She was dying to hear more of their music.  Really, she was dying to hear JC sing. 

She couldn’t believe she didn’t know that was them.  Sure, she had heard their songs before.  How could you not?  She’d just never paid much attention.  Well, now she had a really big reason to pay attention.  He stood somewhere around six feet tall, had a body to die for, golden brown hair with curls in the back that she’d love to run her fingers through – oh – and the most gorgeous blue eyes that had ever stared her in the face.  Yep, that seemed like a pretty damn good reason.

Oh, and although she’d never admit to it, her heart went pitter-patter, pitter-patter when Marcy had referred to him as her man.  That was a very nice thought.

“You gonna get out or did you want to stay in the car?”   Marcy asked with sarcasm as they had already been parked and sitting there for a minute or two.  Oh, but Amanda’s poor head was lost in a world filled with JC.  She’d kill to have him back on her sofa again tonight.

“Sorry,” she finally regained her composure and opened the car door.

“You have totally lost it,” Marcy remarked.  “What did he do to you?”

“Nothing.” Amanda answered defensively.

“Sure it was nothing.  That’s why you’re all spacey, because he did NOTHING.”

Amanda just rolled her eyes and tried ignoring Marcy’s comment.

“Did he kiss you?”  Of course Marcy wouldn’t drop the subject.  The girl was just out right bold when it came to words. 

But Amanda, strangely, felt enthused to tell.  She stopped in her tracks, right there in the middle of the garage, grabbed Marcy lightly by the wrist and revealed softly, “oh god, did he,” she sighed dreamily.

“Ha!” Marcy hopped off the ground with victory.  “I knew it!”

“Shhh,” Amanda sounded, bringing her voice to a whisper.  “I don’t want all the staff to know, okay?”

“Oh, of course,” the woman responded as the two continued to walk, being that a car was heading in their direction.  “Oh Amanda,” Marcy sighed, brushing a hand against her shoulder, “if things should progress between you two, I really think you’re in for the ride of your life.”

“What do you mean?”  Her innocent self was just a little confused by that statement.

The two climbed into an empty elevator and Marcy continued.  “I’ve seen him perform and this man is just oozing with sexiness.   I’d bet you a hundred bucks he’s great in bed.”

“Marcy!”

“You just wait, you’ll see.”

The plane ride that morning had been rough for JC.  Not because he was tired.  More because he seemed to be getting way too many questions from his friends.  

When he finally got everyone off his back and was able to settle into his seat, he leaned his head back, closed his eyes and thought about her.  The way she had nestled so close beside him only hours before.   The way she got all tongue-tied and shy when he’d say certain things or act a certain way.  The taste of her lips on his mouth.  Oh, just the thought of those lips made him ache with want.  He’d die to have those lips against his skin – every part of it.

In fact, that thought had brought on a full fledged daydream.  Amanda wearing that sexy dress she had on in the dress shop that day, placing kisses all over his body and doing things to him that would make his toes curl up. 

By the time he got home, all he could do was think to call her.  But his feelings surprised him, he’d never imagined a woman could invade his thoughts that way.  Somehow, he’d managed to get all caught up in thoughts of Amanda.  So much, that when he realized Jessie was waiting for him at home, a visible frown leaped onto his face. 

He had never asked for her to be there.  The girl just assumed.  Well, if things were the way they were supposed to be, he’d imagine that her surprise would have made him happy.  But under the circumstances, Jessie was the last person he wanted to see. 

Unhappily enough, he wiped the discouraging look off his face, pretended to be glad to see her, then made it clear that he was exhausted and planned on sleeping for the next three days, at least.

She was visibly upset, but he didn’t really care.  He just wanted to be alone.  He didn’t want to deal with that problem right now.  He wanted take a shower, get some rest, and call Amanda.   That’s all he wanted.  He did not want to fight or argue with Jessie, because he knew if she stayed around that’s what would happen.  Granted, it would probably be his fault because he’d been picking a lot of fights with her lately, but he just wasn’t happy with her.  He couldn’t help it.

So after a good twenty minutes, her car finally pulled out of the driveway and he was left alone.  First things first, he took his shower, scratching off the number one thing on his list.

Then he slid into his most comfortable pair of pajamas, climbed on top of his over-sized bed, in his over-sized bedroom and turned on his over-sized television set. 

And then he took a nap, a much needed nap, which also happened to be item number two.  He was saving the best thing for last, and for when he wasn’t quite so tired.

Amanda hung in there till about three in the afternoon.  By mid-day she was so tired that she nearly let her head collapse on top of her desk for a power nap. 

With everything running smoothly, especially since the crazy girls had vanished from the hotel now that *NSYNC was gone, she left the office early and went up to her apartment.

It took her less than a minute to strip out of her confining business clothing and cave in to her bed.  Of course, she first made sure the cordless phone was nearby incase he called while she was asleep.

In record time, she had dozed off and peacefully ventured into a wonderful dream world…

Tenderly he brushed a hand down her arm.  His naked chest moving towards her slowly, it seemed the only thing she could focus on.  “Amanda,” his voice was low and his tone seducing.  “I’ve been thinking about this moment since the first time we met.”

She didn’t wait for another word.  Her body on fire, she reached for him and covered his lips with ravishing kisses - kisses that were needing and passionate and hungry for more, much more.

Delicately his fingers clasped onto the top button of her blouse, popping it open with ease and her breath immediately deepening from his touch.  He traced a finger lightly down her breast bone before fidgeting with the next button, all the while his lips dancing down her neck with a smooth, erotic rhythm. 

Every nerve ending in her body was on fire as he managed to free her from the top half of her clothing.  Taking a tiny step back, he gazed at her with a look of pure adoration.  “You’re beautiful,” he told her softly.  “I’ve thought about this so many times, I can hardly believe it’s happening.”  He stepped to her again and pulled her into his arms.  “I want to make love to you,” he whispered, his breath circling her ear and sending shivers down her spine. 

Swiftly, he scooped her into his arms and carried her to the bed.  

And then the phone rang….

Wait, the phone rang.  Oh God!  Not now! 

“Ugh,” Amanda groggily rolled for the receiver, more than perturbed that she had been disturbed from that sweet visual.

“Hello?”  She answered, her voice hoarse.  Immediately she cleared her throat and repeated the greeting a second time.

“Amanda?”  Oh Lord, it was him.  She’d recognize that voice anywhere.  Besides there were very few men that called her and this voice did not belong to any of the others that did.

“Yes,” she answered, trying so hard to wipe those images of that dream out of her head.  Damn, as much as she wanted to talk to him, a big part of her still wanted to go back to sleep and finish that wonderful fantasy.

“Hi, it’s JC.”

She fell back onto her pillow with an inward sigh.  “Oh, hi,” she remarked casually, as if his call didn’t phase her the least bit. 

“Were you sleeping?”

Oh was she!

“Sort of,” she answered.  The last thing she wanted was for him to feel guilty and not want to talk to her, because now that she had him on the line she didn’t want him to go away. 

“I’m sorry.  Did you want me to let you go?”  He asked.

“Oh, no.  I’m awake now.”

The two settled into a conversation, mainly about nothing in particular.  But it was the kind of conversation Amanda found herself really enjoying because it gave her the chance to get to know him even better. 

And when he told her that he had also just woken up and was still lying in his bed, flipping through the channels on the television and waiting for his take-out to arrive that he’d just ordered – well, it sent a really nice image to her brain.  An image she’d really like to see in person.

Why did she find herself falling deeper and deeper every time she heard that sexy voice of his? 

They talked about their days, Amanda more than him because his day hadn’t consisted of too much apparently.  Just flying home and sleeping.  She didn’t get into too much detail about her lunch with Marcy – for fear of embarrassment, of course – but she did think to tell him that she discovered they sang one of her favorite songs at the moment.

“You’re gonna think I’m idiot, but I’m going to tell you this anyway,” she told him.

“What?”  he asked with a chuckle, “I would never think of you as an idiot.”

“Uh, don’t be so sure because I can’t even believe that I’m admitting this to you, but for some reason I’m going to.”

He laughed again, and she could tell that he was more than curious to hear what she had to say.  “You know you’re new single on the radio?”

“Yeah.”

“Well, I’m an idiot because I did not know that was you guys, and I feel really, well, like an idiot.”

JC laughed, but Amanda could tell he wasn’t laughing at her, he was laughing with her, so to speak.  Even though, she wasn’t laughing.  At any rate, she didn’t think he was trying to put her down.  It just struck him as amusing.

“So, do you like the song?”  He finally asked.

“Oh, yeah.  I like it a lot.”

“Well, that’s all that really matters,” he told her, and then added, “no, that’s not true.  I’m glad you like it, but if you didn’t I’d understand, I think.”

Amanda giggled at the way he was carrying on.  She was also realizing that talking to him on the phone seemed a lot easier than she’d imagined.  Maybe it was because she didn’t get so sidetracked with how gorgeous he was because she couldn’t see him.  Although, his voice was enough to die for.  God, she missed him way more than she should have for hardly knowing the guy.  Why did he have to leave after they’d just barely met?

After talking for over an hour, a conversation that included a lot of laughter and playful flirting, JC sprung the most surprising, yet intriguing question on her.   “So, how hard is it for you to take time off?”  he asked.

“I don’t know, why?”  She was too curious to answer.  What exactly was he implying?

“How do you not know?” he asked in return.

“Well, like how much time?” she clarified.

“Just a few days, like this weekend.” Now he was getting more specific.  This weekend was only three days away.

“Um, I could probably work something out if it was worth it.”

“Oh…” he smirked, “if it’s worth it?  Well, am I worth it?”

Oh, that was a bold question.  So bold Amanda didn’t know how to respond.  In fact, she could only chuckle at his outspokenness – and his obvious interest in her, which made her just a little giddy.  Because, man, was she interested in him.

“Well?”  he asked again.

“You could be.”  She finally answered.

“I could be?”  he asked, “uh huh, you better stop teasing me, girl.”

Damn, did she love it when he played around with her that way. 

“Anyway, get to the point,” she told him, somewhat dodging the inquiry about his worthiness.

“I just thought you might want to meet me in L.A. this weekend,” he finally proposed.

“Los Angeles?”  Boy, would she love to do that. 

Immediately she ran down the agenda of hotel functions for the upcoming weekend.  How hard would it be to leave?  Could she do it without her father finding out?  Not that he had ever told her she couldn’t leave, but if he found out the reason why, well, then she’d have a lot of explaining to do and she just wasn’t ready for that.

“Yeah, as in Hollywood, Beverly Hills, Disneyland…”

“Yes, I know that, thank you.”

“Well?  What do you think?”

“What would we be doing?” Her curiosity was more than peaked.  This was definitely a left turn.  She had never expected him to be so… well, forward.  Although, now that she had thought about it, he had been pretty forward with her since the day they met so it wasn’t too surprising, really.

He responded to her question with laughter, devilish laughter.  Oh, what was that mind of his thinking?  And was she ready for it? 

After that dream she had earlier, hell yes.

“JC?”

“Oh, sorry.  I do have some business matters, but nothing major,” he explained.  “Mainly we’d just be hanging out.”

“Where would I be staying?”

“In a hotel, with me.  Well, not with me, with me.  I mean, I’d get you your own room.  I’m not trying to pull a fast one on you or anything.”

Oh, but maybe she wanted a fast one?  Or a slow one?  Or an all weekend one?  Jeez, what had gotten into her all the sudden?  She knew what it was, it was that comment Marcy had made earlier.  Along with that luscious dream.  No wonder her hormones were working overtime.

“So, what’d ya think?” he asked.

“Um, can I give you answer tomorrow?”  Really, she wanted to say yes right then and there, but she didn’t want to sound too, well, over-excited.  She had to make him chase her a little bit – she guessed, sort of.  She was awful new at this stuff.

“Yeah, sure.  That’s fine.”

For the rest of the conversation, Amanda’s mind was in a whirlwind.  She’d have never expected this.  A week ago she would have never even imagined something so crazy – but wonderful – could be happening to her. 

And it was all because she had decided to go down to the bar and play the piano on that one Friday night.

Funny how one event could make such a drastic change in a persons life.  

©2001 BrandyRae

Chapter 10

Three days later Amanda found herself on a flight to Los Angeles, nervous as hell.  Oh, she almost hadn’t made it.  Not only had her father called the day before, causing her to quickly make up some crazy excuse about getting together with some old friends from college, but--besides that--she was only a mere smidgen away from chickening out.It hadn’t helped that Marcy force her into the hotel’s salon where Marquise, their top stylist, had his way with her.  Now she was afraid JC wouldn’t even recognize her with her newly straightened hair.  

Although, she had to admit it did look much better and it was way more manageable than it had been before.  But it was a change, and Amanda had never handled change very well. She was also dressed a little more casual than she was used to.   Yep, Marcy had forced her shopping, too.

Why did she share the news of her little trip with that woman?  She’d feel a lot more comfortable in her navy pants suit, or one of her many skirts and silk blouses, than she did in the pair of jeans and thin sweater she was wearing. But she supposed she did look nice.  Marcy did have a good sense when it came to fashion and Amanda did trust her judgment.  

Of course, it was a good thing JC wasn’t meeting her at the airport because he’d probably never recognize her.  In fact, when he finally did show up at her hotel room door, which was where they had planned on meeting later that afternoon, he probably wouldn’t even know it was her.  He’d probably think he had knocked on the wrong door or something, because Amanda just did not look like Amanda.

Stepping into the airport, Amanda felt a tad bit overwhelmed, but reminded herself it had been her choice to find her own means to the hotel.  JC had offered to have someone pick her up, being that he wouldn’t be able to do it himself, but Amanda refused.  In fact, she went as far as to tell him that if someone was there, holding up a sign with her name on it, she’d ignore it and whoever would’ve only wasted a trip.  

She had no problems taking a taxi. And that she did. With her carry-on rolling right beside her, and no need to stop at the baggage claim, she headed straight out of the terminal to hail a cab.  Of course, there were only a zillion or so waiting.  She had no problems getting one right away.

She seemed to be sitting on the edge of her seat as the cabbie made the drive to the hotel.  She was just a little nervous about checking-in.  

JC had told her that the reservation had already been made in her name and all she had to do was sign in at the front desk.  Of course, she was sure the room had already been paid for, as well, and that was just unacceptable.  Yes, she was his guest, but she was more than capable of paying for her own room.  That was one habit she did not want to start – not now, not ever.

After fighting through traffic, the driver finally dropped her in front of the grand looking hotel.  Of course, being in the business herself, she had her own first impressions.  Maybe she was a little biased in thinking it wasn’t as nice as hers, but it would definitely do.  

And it was most certainly very upscale.  That much was obvious just by the clientele that were traipsing in and out of the overpowering front entrance.The climate was fair and her sweater seemed a little warm.   She had to remind herself that she was in sunny California now and that the weather was just a little different than what she was used to.  It was a good thing she had packed lighter clothes for her stay. 

After checking-in at the front desk, her hunch being confirmed that the room was in fact pre-paid, she made way up to the tenth floor.  Her nerves seemed a little jumbled as she trotted through an ornately decorated lobby leading to a hallway lined with beveled mirrors and tall chandeliers hanging from above.  Her shoes clicked and clacked lightly across the expensively tiled floors with its intricate designs of beiges and blues. The air smelled fresh and well ventilated, not a whiff or odor of anything to be found.  

Finally making it to the elevator, she stopped, pressed the button, waited for the ding of the bell and then climbed in once the heavy mirrored doors had slid open completely.

Two older gentleman and one very voluptuous blond followed her inside.  She grinned at all three before they turned their backs to her in waiting for their floor. Amanda couldn’t help but wonder why JC had gone for someone like herself instead of the gorgeous woman in front of her.  But she supposed that did say something about his personality.   A quality that was positive to say the least.   He obviously was interested in more than just a person’s outer shell.  She’d have to say that was reassuring coming from a ridiculously popular, twenty-five year old, pop phenomenon.

Now she had first hand knowledge that he wasn’t some egotistical bastard like some celebrities could be.  A fact she had experienced more than once thanks to the many famous faces that had stayed in her hotel.  It was refreshing to meet someone so down to earth. Item number one hundred and twenty-two of why she liked him so much.

As the elevator finally made its stop at her floor, her tummy rumbled with anticipation.  Even though they had discussed meeting later because JC’s schedule was booked until mid-afternoon, she couldn’t help but hope his plans had changed and that he’d be waiting to greet her with open arms.

Instead, she stepped into an enormous suite where the living room alone was twice the size of her own.  It was furnished to the max, complete with wet bar, big screen television, three plushy sofas, a fireplace and some very expensive looking artwork on the walls. Gasping, she had to stand still to take it all in.  Impressing her hadn’t been necessary.  She was already impressed – by him.  There was no need to impress her with anything else.  But nevertheless, he had.  The suite was absolutely breathtaking. 

Slowly she wandered through the impressive room, heading towards what looked to be not one, but two bedrooms.  Her breath on pause, she stopped to wonder, was he sharing a suite with her?  When he said she’d get her own room, was that what he meant? Peeking into the first open doorway she saw an enormous bed decorated neatly in beige and bronze with streaks of white running through the intricate fabric.   Pillows were piled at the head of the bed with a definite pattern in mind.  And on each nightstand sat a full vase of beautifully arranged, fresh flowers.  In fact, she could smell them from the doorway as if they had just been cut and placed their only moments before.  She had to wonder if that, in deed, was the case.

Making way to the next bedroom, she discovered her intuition had served her right as she noticed a few of his things sitting neatly in an open closet.   Gradually she stepped into his room, staring at the black suit hanging neatly in the closet and the sheen black shoes, sitting on the shelf underneath, to match.  Beside the first pair were two pairs of tennis shoes, one white pair of Adidas and one dark blue-ish colored pair of Nike’s.  His suitcase was zipped and sitting on the luggage rack. She had no intentions of snooping.  She would have never even looked in the closet if it hadn’t been left open.  Amanda had to wonder if he had done that intentionally. She also realized that there were no fresh flowers in his room.  Beyond the closet was a bathroom.  Only peering in for a second, she noted he had left a few personal items on the counter, but other than that it was spotless.  There was no dirty laundry on the floor or even a wet towel.  Just bright white tile that glistened like it had recently been cleaned, and it was very possible that it had.

In a bit of a daze, she wandered back to the front entryway to retrieve her luggage and get somewhat settled.  But first, after rolling her small suitcase into her bedroom, she sat down on the bed and tried to regain the normalcy of her heart rate, because at that moment her blood was pumping way too fast. It was then she realized the little note on one of the off-white colored nightstands.  

Amanda, Hope this arrangement is okay with you.  Make yourself at home and I’ll see you in a few hours. --JC

Falling back on the mattress, she took in a deep sigh as she gazed dreamily above at the ceiling.  This weekend was going to change her whole life.  In some ways, it already had.

After finishing up early, JC anxiously rode up the elevator to his and Amanda’s suite.  That was a nice thought.  His and Amanda’s suite… Even if they were in two separate bedrooms, you never know what could happen.  Not that that was his intention.  He just wanted to spend time with her, plain and simple.

He didn’t care if all the other guys thought he was crazy.  He didn’t care that Mike didn’t approve.  He didn’t care that he had lied to Jessie and told her that he would be so tied up all weekend that he probably wouldn’t even have a chance to call her.All he cared about was seeing Amanda.And very soon, that wish would come true.  She was waiting for him in their room.  Man, he really did like the sound of that.

He wondered what her reaction had been when she realized he was staying their, too.  Hopefully she hadn’t taken it the wrong way.  He really did have only the best intentions in mind.  Really he did.

There was an uncanny spring to his step as he ventured down the long corridor.  He noticed an attractive brunette at the ice machine, but for once in his life, he didn’t even take a second glance. Slipping his key into the lock, he opened the door excitedly yet with just a bit of nervousness.  “Hello?”  he called.

No answer.

He stepped into the living room and it was obvious she had been there, if nothing else than from the trace of her perfume that lingered in the room. That two seconds of worry disappeared.  She had definitely shown up, she had just stepped out for the minute.  He had to remember, he was early, after all.Taking two steps forwards, he heard her footsteps and froze. “I’m afraid to touch anything,” she said from behind him, “this suite is so beautiful, I don’t want to mess anything up.”

Slowly he turned around.  And then it hit.   Wait a minute… was it really her?   It had only been a few days.  How could someone change so drastically in only a few days?  

She looked absolutely amazing.  “Amanda?”

“I know,” she said, walking towards him, “they made me go to the salon.  I fought it the whole way, but they made me go.

”He was almost at a loss for words as she slowly closed the distance between them.  Finally, he managed to speak.  “You look--" well, he was trying to speak, anyway.  “You look… great.”

“Thanks,” she grinned.  Her shimmering lips looked utterly kissable.  Her hair seemed longer than it had been before, or maybe it was just the fact that it was straight.  Who knew… all he knew was that he liked it, a lot.

And she looked so much more at ease in the denim jeans she was wearing.  Not too mention the fact that the pale green sweater hugging comfortably to her chest really brought out the color in her eyes.  He could see the flecks of green and gold dancing around her pupils as she stared at him with such positive energy.

Then he realized… she had been the one at the ice machine.  No, the full pail of ice she held in her hands didn’t give it away.  Well, not at first.  It had taken a minute to register. Without a second thought, he took the glass bucket from her grasp and moved to set it on the bar.   “I passed you in the hall and I didn’t even realize it was you.” 

Amanda chuckled and he was immediately smitten.  All of the sudden, he felt like a school boy standing in front of his first crush.  This was absolutely unreal.  But it was also wonderful. 

“Yeah, I kinda thought that was you,” she finally remarked with a dainty laugh.

“Why didn’t you say something?” he asked.

“Hmph… I don’t know.”

He didn’t know either, quite a lot of things, actually.   He knew he could just stand there like a dumb ass, because that’s how he felt – completely dumbfounded and speechless.   Or, he could figure out something to say.   That was probably more of a good idea.

But she beat him to the punch.

“Oh,” she called out, as if some thought had just sprung into her mind, “I need to pay you for my half of the room.”

Was she kidding?  Did she realize how much he had paid for the room?  No way.  No way would he let that happen.  “No, I don’t think so.  I invited you.   You’re my guest.”

“I don’t care,” she argued and fled towards the room she would be sleeping in for the next two nights.

“Amanda,” he said, following, “what are you doing?”

“I’m getting my purse so I can pay you,” she announced, still on a mission and looking as if there was no stopping her whatsoever, disappearing through the open doorway.

He entered her bedroom to find her reaching into the closet, slightly bent over in a very eye pleasing position.  It took all of his might not to step up behind her and grab onto her waist.  “Amanda,” he called to her again.

This time he startled her, watching as her breath came in short and her head smacked into one of the heavy, built-in shelves inside the closet.  Immediately he rushed to her aid, now feeling incredibly guilty.   “Oh shit,” he gasped, “I’m sorry.  I didn’t mean to make you hit your head.  Are you okay?”

WAS SHE OKAY?  Let’s see, in a matter of about fifteen seconds she had hit her head, been scooped into JC’s arms and was now perched, almost, in his lap as they both sat on the floor beside the closet.  Was she okay?   Um, no.  She didn’t think so.

“Yeah, I’m okay,” she rubbed her head while looking over him as he sat so close.  His heat radiated through to the innermost parts of her body and made her just a little flushed. 

“Are you sure?”

“Yeah, I’m sure.  It’s just a little bump,” she remarked.

This time he reached up to feel if there was a knot on her head.   “That’s not little,” he disagreed, “that’s pretty good-sized.  You think you should put some ice on it?”

“No,” she waved a hand through the air, shrugging off the idea, “I’ll be fine.”

But neither of them moved.  He sat there with his arms locked around her and she didn’t try to budge out of his hold one bit. “I’m sorry,” he said again.

“It’s okay, I just didn’t expect you to be right behind me.   Guess I’m a little jumpy today.”

“Sorry,” he repeated for a third time, his voice quiet and whispery.

“It’s okay,” she told him once more, her voice equally as soft as his.

Time almost seemed to tick in slow motion as he braced a hand tenderly against her cheek and eased his mouth to hers.  Instantly the throbbing in her head disappeared.  Or, perhaps, it shifted somewhere else and became a much more pleasant sensation.  She wasn’t sure, but either way, she was feeling no pain whatsoever.  In fact, that’s the last thing she was feeling.

The tips of his fingers gracefully slid down her cheek as he brushed his lips to hers one last time before backing away slowly.  “I’m really glad you’re here,” he spoke softly. Amanda’s eyes remained closed as she basked in the moment the two had just shared. Fighting the urge to pull him back, to kiss him so passionately and give in to the temptation that pulled and prodded at her, she opened her eyes and, instead, replied, “me too,” with a whimsical grin.

He hopped to his feet and extended a hand to help her up.   “I’m still going to pay you for my half,” Amanda remarked, rising to her feet as prompted.

“And how do you plan on doing that if I won’t let you?” 

“Don’t worry.  I’ll think of something.”

“You know,” he remarked slyly, a devilish gleam filling his gorgeous blue eyes, “there are other ways you could pay me.  If you feel it absolutely necessary, I would accept sexual favors as payment for your half of the room.”  He spoke with absolute seriousness.

But was he serious?  Oh, Amanda’s eyes were round with surprise and her jaw nearly gaped open. Although, as shocked as she was, somewhere deep inside there was a part of her that realized his offer was deliciously tempting.

JC burst into laughter.  “I’m just kidding,” he clarified, grabbing her hand and pulling her out of the bedroom.  “You should’ve seen your face,” he added, his amusement quite apparent as he spoke.  Without question he sat her down on one of the sofas and plopped on the cushion right beside her.  “Besides,” he continued, his laughter subsiding and a much more serious tone taking over, “I’m more of a giver than a taker.”

Oh Lord, did he just say he was more a giver than a taker?   Why was Marcy’s comment about this being the ride of her life slipping back into her head?  If he wasn’t implying something – well, Amanda was positive that he was implying something.  And what that something was sounded extremely desirable, even for her-virginal-self. Of course she had no reply to his remark.  What do you say to something like that?  How do you respond to such a blatant innuendo? 

He was more a giver than a taker…

Those words just rolled through her mind over and over and over again.  Not even daring to think about the sexiness in his voice when he had said it.  Oh no, if she let that get to her she’d really be in trouble. Although, obviously it was too late because it already had.  She was thinking of it right that very second.

He was more a giver than a taker…What exactly did that mean anyway?  Did that mean he was an impeccable lover?  That he’d put forth one hundred and ten percent into pleasing his partner?  Oh God, she was getting flushed just thinking about it.  Huh, just thinking about how she would really like to know if it was true or not.

“Amanda, why are you blushing?” he asked with a grin. It was so obvious he enjoyed torture.  She almost had to wonder if he had some inkling on how innocent she actually was.  Were the words, hey, I’m a virgin, written across her forehead, or what?

Of course, her first instinct was to pretend she had no clue of what he was talking about.  “I’m not,” she defended.

“Okay, you’re not.”  He agreed with that boyish grin of his, obviously lying because she knew for a fact that she had turned an even brighter shade of red after he had so boldly brought it up.  Damn the man, why was he so good at teasing her?

Thankfully, he let the conversation shift and, instead, asked about her flight.  The warmth immediately withdrew from her cheeks as they settled into a much less personal discussion.

They talked and all she could think about was how badly she wanted him.  How she had never felt so turned-on by a man in her entire life.  How she’d give just about anything to spend the night in his arms.  And, most enticingly, how that reality wasn’t all that far fetched.

He was leaving it up to her and she knew it.  The cards were in her hand and it was her turn to make a move.  Only Amanda had no clue what move she was supposed to make.

Why was she feeling like she suddenly needed to break away for an emergency call to Marcy?  Help! she would scream, he wants me.  What do I do next? 

She could hear Marcy’s answer already, stop being so nervous and just let things happen the way they’re supposed to. Yep, that’s what her friend would say.  Okay, she was going to stop thinking about how damned attractive he was sitting barely inches away and just enjoy his company.

Yeah, right…

Finally, after enough casual chit-chat, JC announced to her that he had ordered some movies and whenever they were hungry he’d call down for room service.  “Tomorrow night I’m taking you out on the town,” he told her, “tonight we’ll just stay in.  If that’s okay with you?”

Oh, was it ever.

“That sounds fine,” she agreed.  But she was awful curious where he would be taking her the following night.  She tried not to ask, but her curiosity got the best of her.  “So, where are we going tomorrow night?”

“Somewhere that does not involve a hotel,” he answered instantaneously, “because I feel bad enough for keeping you captive here tonight, but at least it’s not YOUR hotel.”

Okay, now she was his captive.  This was getting even more interesting.

“It would just be too crazy if we went out tonight,” he continued, “the other guys are leaving in the morning, so they’ll think I left, too.”

“Oh.”  Amanda remarked.   Whatever the reason, she was perfectly happy being kept captive by him in their extravagant suite.  Like she would be upset over that.  “Well, you don’t have to take me out tomorrow night, either.  I mean, if you’re worried about it.  I don’t mind hanging out here.”

He glanced at her with a slight tilt of his head.  A combination of the boyish grin and the devilish one slithered across his lips – his oh-so-kissable lips.  “You don’t, huh?” he asked.

Amanda couldn’t handle it when he looked at her that way.   Did he understand what his presence did to a girl?  To her?     Did he realize that with one look of those beautiful blue eyes he could probably have anything or anyone he ever wanted?  He probably did.  He had to.

JC leaned in towards her and she knew she was in trouble.   “Well, no. I mean, I’m not picky,” she sputtered, “I don’t expect you to – “  She was trying to make sense of herself, but with little success. 

“To what?” he asked, leaning even closer as he braced one arm against the back of the couch.

“Well, you know.” 

“No, I don’t know,” he replied.

Oh!  Why was she having such a difficult time finding her words again!  Damn him for making her feel so completely… senseless.

“I don’t expect you to entertain me,” she concluded. 

He stared at her with amusement, but it was also something deeper than that.  It was like he was reading her.  Like he was looking past her exterior and staring straight into the depth of her inner self.  If she guessed correctly, he was lost in thought – thoughts about her. 

“Oh,” he finally responded, “but Amanda, that’s what I do.”

“But you don’t have to do that for me.  I mean – “ 

“What do you mean?” he asked after she failed to finish her sentence.

“I just mean, you can be yourself around me,” she said.

“I am being myself,” he remarked.

“I know, I didn’t mean it like that.”  

Oh my, where was she coming up with all this?

“Well, what did you mean it like?”

Amanda couldn’t stand it anymore, she was so frustrated she had to scream. “Oh my God!” she exclaimed, “Would you knock it off?”

JC laughed, taking her hand in his and rubbing his thumb gently into her palm.  “I’m sorry,” he smirked, “can you not handle me?”

Oh, was that the understatement of the century.

“Apparently not,” she answered.

“Amanda,” he said, now massaging her hand with both of his thumbs, “why do I make you so nervous?  Sometimes you seem really comfortable around me and other times, like just now, you look like you want to run and hide.  Don’t be scared of me.  I’m not gonna bite you.”

“I’m not scared of you,” she said, enjoying every point of pressure he was applying to her fully relaxed palm and now, as he moved on, her forearm.

“Well, I take that back,” he interjected, “if I was gonna bite, I promise it wouldn’t hurt.”

With that remark, she sank even deeper into the sofa and covered her face with her free hand.

“What?” he asked naively.  “Am I being too forward?  Do you want me to stop?”

“Not really,” she whined, still refusing to look at him, “I don’t think.”

“Look,” he told her, stopping the arm massage and pulling her hand away from her face, forcing her to look his direction, “don’t take everything I say so seriously.  I’m just playin’ with you.  I like to tease you.  Haven’t you figured that out yet?”

She only nodded her head yes.

“I promise I’m on my best behavior this weekend.  I would never try to take advantage of you.” JC stood up and headed towards the mini bar only a few feet away.  “I know it’s kinda scary getting involved with a guy like me.  I can understand where you’re coming from.”  He opened a small fridge and pulled out a bottle of water.   “Thirsty?” he asked.

“Yes, thank you,” she answered. 

He grabbed a second bottle of water and headed back towards the couch.“I really like you,” he told as he handed her the water and sat down beside her, “obviously, or I wouldn’t have invited you here.  I just want to show you a good time and get to know you better – and I don’t mean that in a sexual way, I swear,” he grinned.  “Well… not that I would put up much of a fight, if you really must know.”

“JC,” she called to him softly.

“What sweetheart?”  Those words made her ache.  He spoke them with such tenderness and caring.

“It’s not that I don’t feel all those same things.  Really, it’s not.  And it’s not because you are who you are.  That’s not it at all.  I just – I just haven’t been out on a date in a really long time, let alone spent the weekend with a man.  I mean, I’m just a little out of my element, that’s all.”

“Yeah, because you’re not in your hotel.  I know that,” he remarked.  “But we’re not going to talk about that right now.  We will talk about it though, later.”

“Okay,” she didn’t quite understand what that meant, but agreed anyway.

“So, you don’t have to answer this if you don’t want to, but how long has it been?  Since you’ve been out on a date, that is.”

He would have to ask.

“Five years,” she answered.

JC stared at her with wide eyes, eyes of disbelief and shock. “Amanda, how – I mean, who?  I don’t understand.  How could you?   For five years?  I mean, I know there’s got to be men asking you out all the time.   How come you don’t accept?”

“I take that back,” she said, “I did go out with this one guy a year or two ago that was the son of one of my father’s associates or something.  He was a huge jerk and I didn’t really count it as a date, but I suppose technically it was.”

It was obvious by the look on JC’s face that he still didn’t understand. “I keep to myself a lot and I work a lot.  I don’t really go out to meet men, or whatever.”  Amanda tried her best to explain.

He looked at her as if her words pained him in some way.   “So, this guy – whoever – that you dated like five years ago.  Was that pretty serious?”

“Um, it was a college thing.  No, not really.”

“A college thing,” he remarked with a smirk, the tension in his features easing up a bit.  “I wouldn’t know about those kind of things.” 

Amanda was sure he assumed it had been more than it was.  “Yeah, well you didn’t miss too much.”

“Maybe,” he said, “I’m not complaining.  I love what I do.  I’m very lucky.”

She couldn’t argue that. “But enough of this serious talk,” he said right before taking a giant gulp of water.  She watched as his head tilted back and as his adam’s apple bounced slightly up and down his throat as he swallowed.  “Are you getting hungry yet?”

“I could eat.”

“Good, because I really can’t stand it when women don’t eat.  You know how some are.  Afraid of a calorie or two.  That drives me nuts.”

“I’m not like that,” Amanda assured.

“Good,” he repeated.  “I’ll go grab the room service menu.”

Amanda watched as he trotted towards the bar and pulled the leather-bound menu off the counter.  JC was bouncy and full of energy.  She loved to watch him move.  It didn’t matter what he was doing.  His body was like a finely tuned piece of machinery that excelled at whatever it did--whatever he did. She realized now that Marcy had been right.  Amanda was in for the ride of her life, no matter how far it went.   So far, it had been better than anything she had ever experienced.  She could only imagine what was to come.  Their weekend had barely begun and already she found herself falling even deeper, but it felt to good to try and stop it.  Not now, not when everything felt so right. 

Chapter 11

After deciding on what they would eat for dinner, JC told Amanda he was going to take a shower before their food arrived and she agreed that freshening-up did sound like a good idea. So with that, she locked her bedroom door and headed off to her own private bathroom for a quick shower herself.

Of course, being alone gave her the opportunity to try and get a grip on things. The past hour and a half, ever since JC had arrived, had been way too overwhelming. Not only was her heart rate off the charts, again, but her mind and her stomach were both doing flip flops.

Amanda was hungry, though. That much she realized. Maybe that's why her stomach was so tied up. Or, at least part of it anyway. A good part of it was because of JC. There was no doubt about that. But, then again, she hadn't eaten a thing all day. She had been way too anxious to make time for food.

Her mind, now that was another story. She kept screening all of those little flirtatious hints he threw her way. Gosh, those were enough to send any girl over the edge. If she would have been any other woman, other than herself, she probably would have attacked the man by now. He was awfully hard to resist. Even for someone who knew nothing about being intimate except for what she had read in her gushy romance novels. Thank God for those or else she'd be totally clueless.
At times like these, she really wished she wasn't such an idiot about those sort of things. Why hadn't she been more experimental in college? Why hadn't she attempted a date over the last five years? Why hadn't she done something to have some kind knowledge or background or experience?

It didn't matter. It was too late now. The opportunity had finally fallen upon her and, dammit, she was going to take it.

She wasn't going to worry about one week from now or one month or two months or even a year from now. She was going to concentrate on that very weekend and that was it. And she was going to have a good time and enjoy herself and if one thing led to another, she was going to let it.

At least then she wouldn't be so damned inexperienced. And, what a man to say was her first. But would anyone believe her? Or would she even share such a private detail of her life? Probably not. She'd probably keep it all to herself.
But that would be okay. As long as she had the memory, who cared about anyone else.

After rinsing off in the shower, she searched her suitcase for something comfortable to put on. Her hair still piled on top of her head, she let her towel fall to the floor and slid into her undergarments. As she did, she realized something black and lacey just barely poking out of the upper pocket. With caution she pulled it out, unveiling a very sheer, sexy looking piece of lingerie - that she had not packed. "Marcy," she whispered to herself, "I'm gonna kill you."

She shoved it back in the pouch and pulled out a pair of dark blue warm-up pants. They were the noisy kind, the kind that went swoosh-swoosh when you walked, that snapped, or unsnapped, completely up both legs. But they were comfortable and that's what she was aiming for. As she slid a t-shirt over her head, she heard him in the other room. He was humming and, it sounded like, moving things around.
Quickly she jogged back to the bathroom to remove her hair from the top of her head, her pants swoosh-swooshing the entire way. But as soon as she did, she realized that her newfound-do was doing some terribly strange things since she had neglected to wash it when she showered. "Oh crap," Amanda sounded to herself, "I knew I should have washed it."

She brushed her reddish-brown locks aggressively, hoping the strange indent creased into her hair would disappear. Finally she gave up and slid it back into a ponytail. It wasn't exactly the hairstyle she wanted him to see, but oh well.
Hurrying back through the bedroom, she almost let herself out, but stopped to realize her bare feet. Should she put shoes on?

This situation was the strangest she'd ever been in. Here she was rooming with a man she had known for only a short time, but the time they were spending together made it seem as if they had known each other forever. Why would she wear tennis shoes if they weren't going anywhere? Okay, she decided socks would be good enough.

With everything figured out, she took in a deep breath and opened her door to the living room. For some odd reason, it relieved her when she didn't see him standing there waiting. What she did see, was the table set neatly for two with the food already present, but covered tightly by silver lids to keep it warm.

One thing for sure, it smelled wonderful. She wandered slowly towards the table, taking in a big whiff while glancing towards JC's room, where she found him sitting on the edge of his bed with his cell phone to his ear. He held up one finger as if to tell her to wait just a minute. Amanda only smiled cordially in return.
There was something about a freshly showered man that was completely irresistible. Especially this man. Although she tried not to stare, it was tough. He sat comfortably in a pair of black pants with a thick white stripe running down the side of the leg. She was guessing that they were made out of a material very similar to her own. On his chest was a red t-shirt with some brand name or something written in small white letters on the front. And on his feet, white socks. Just like her.

Taking a few more steps towards the table, she looked back in his room once again, just as he closed his tiny phone, stood and tossed the device onto the mattress. He walked towards her with a cheerful smile, "sorry," he said and then stopped, "oh wait. I'm gonna forget where I put that."
He turned back around, picked up his phone and placed it on the night stand beside his bed.

"Okay," he remarked as he returned, "sorry about that."

"That's okay."

Amanda reached to pull out her chair, but JC was quick to stop her. "I'll get that for you," he insisted.

"Oh, thanks." With a smile she sat down in the chair he had so chivalrously pulled out for her and watched as he walked around to the opposite side and sat down across from her.

"Feel better?" he asked, scooting himself closer to the table.

"Yes, much better. Except for my hair's doing crazy things. I'm still not used to it yet."

"I think it looks fine."

She grinned, feeling a little like she needed to pinch herself to remind her that this was actually happening. At times, it was still hard to believe. This definitely being one of them. He just looked so absolutely gorgeous sitting across from her. And even over the food she could smell his soapy clean, freshly shaved, scent of man. Oh, she was so going to loose it. There was no way she could handle much more of this torture.

"Wine?" He asked, handling the expensive bottle.

"Sure," Amanda agreed, knowing unmistakably that wine made her just a little loopy. Boy, was she in trouble.

He poured them each a glass and Amanda politely told him, "thanks."

"You know," JC remarked as he lifted the lid from his plate, "this is the first meal we've shared together."

"I guess it is," Amanda agreed.

"Since," JC added while casually waving his fork at her as he spoke, "you turned me down for lunch that day. I guess you could count the popcorn at the movies and the snacks we ate your house, but- no, that doesn't really count, does it?"

"I guess not." Amanda couldn't figure out why she was so nervous all of the sudden. Hoping to calm her nerves, she took a big swig of the merlot he had poured for her, knowing she would be sorry later.

Dinner carried on nicely. And after a few more sips of wine, she was feeling much more at ease. Surprisingly, she even drank a second glass. Well, most of a second glass. And surprisingly, she wasn't quite as loopy as she thought she'd be.
Until she stood up.

They had finished eating and JC had been carrying on about dessert. Actually, he had been doing that flirty hinting thing again. Only this time, instead of shying away, she had been giggling like a school girl. But after convincing him she had no room for dessert - the food kind that is - she stood from the table and all that wine must've poured straight to her feet because she nearly fell.

Amanda braced herself against her chair and in a way more silly voice than she would have liked, said, "whoa."

"Are you drunk?" JC asked with a quirky grin as he stepped to her aid.

"No, of course not," she answered unconvincingly.

Okay, now the loopiness was kicking in. Or maybe it had before and she just hadn't realized it. She had been giggling a lot. Oh Lord, she was really in trouble now.

His smile grew even bigger as he slid a hand into hers. "Can you walk or do I haveto carry you?" he asked.

"Pshh, I can walk. Thank you very much," she remarked with spunk.

JC was obviously amused by her foggy state of mind because he was laughing and shaking his head the entire way to the couch.

"JC," she asked, "were you trying to get me drunk so you could take advantage of me?" Somewhere deep in her head she realized that without the influence of the alcohol, that question would have never popped out of her mouth, but at that moment, she wasn't too worried about it.

He only laughed even more. "That was not my intention, I swear," he answered.
Amanda plopped down on the sofa and JC switched on the large television set in front of them. "So, which movie did you want to watch?" he asked.

"Nothing scary," she told him.

"What? You afraid of the dark or something?" he asked playfully, taking his seat beside her.

"No, I just don't like them," she replied.

"I promise to protect you from the boogie man," he assured her with a wink.
Oh, that made her feel so much better.

"Look," he added after a few seconds, "if you get really scared, you can come sleep with me and I'll protect you. And I promise I'll be on good behavior, really I will."

He looked at her with that devilish twinkle in his eye again and she knew when he said he'd be on good behavior that he was pretty much full of it. If that situation were to arise, she knew it would not just be innocent sleeping going on.

"Just pick something else," she finally told him.

"Okay, okay. How ‘bout an action movie? Can you handle that?"

"Yes, that's fine," she answered.

JC switched the channel and turned on the movie. As he returned the remote control to the coffee table, the word "wimp" slid out of his mouth just loud enough for Amanda to barely make it out.

"Am not," she, of course, had to argue.

He looked at her with a mischievous grin. "Can't handle a little horror movie," he teased.

"So." She didn't have much to counter with. "I'm sure there's some things you can't handle."

JC let out a throaty laugh and Amanda knew instantly that she had opened up a can of worms. "I'm sure there is," he finally responded.

"See, so don't make fun of me."

"I wasn't," he argued.

"Yes you were."

"Shhh," he quieted her, "the movie's starting."

The look on his face wasn't the least bit serious and there was something about him sitting there, staring at the TV with that silly grin across his lips that really made her just want to tackle him right there on the spot.

"Don't tell me to shush." As the words slipped passed her lips a hand reached for his rib cage. It was almost as if she didn't even realize she was reaching out to touch him. For once, it was an action that happened with absolutely no thought involved first. No red flags went off in her head telling her not to do it. Nope, this time she just went for it.

Amanda froze as he reached for the hand that had attached itself to his side. He looked at her, feigning seriousness for only a few seconds and then smiled widely.

"You trying to start something?" he asked, still holding onto her hand at his side.

"Me? No." She played innocent.

"Because, trust me, I will win," he assured her.

"Oh, will you?" Amanda asked challengingly.

"Yes. I always win," he said, dropping her hand.

"You always win, huh?"

"Pretty much."

"Huh, I bet I could beat you at something."

JC just looked at her with pure amusement. "What?"

"I don't know. I'm sure you're not good at everything."

"You're right. You know what I'm really bad at? Singing."

"Shut up." Amanda didn't believe that for a second.

"No really. I can't dance either."

"You're so full of crap your eyes are turning brown."

JC looked at her with a devious half-smile, one corner of his mouth raised slightly higher than the other. "There's other things I can't do either," he remarked, but eluded differently by raising his brow just enough for her to notice.

Oh my, there were those flirty hinting comments again. She could not handle those. Especially now, with that liquid courage flowing through her system.
"Hmph." Amanda slouched into the arm of the couch. "I bet," she remarked quietly and folded her arms around her legs. Maybe there they would be safe from attacking him. She hoped... sort of.

Situating himself comfortably with his own feet resting on the table in front of him, he grabbed on to her ankles and pulled her feet onto his lap. As he searched her face for a reaction he realized, although her eyes were wide, she was far from protesting.

"What are you doing?" she asked calmly.

"Another thing I'm really bad at. Foot massages." And with that, his fingers and thumbs began kneading into the bottom of her left foot.

Forget the fact that her feet were sitting on his lap and that, alone, was enough to die for. Oh no, add the pressure of his hands massaging and rubbing with expertise, now that was just pure ecstasy. Combine that with the wine she drank earlier and Amanda was completely and utterly relaxed.

If this was something he was really bad at, she'd hate to find out what he did really good, because already this feat was amazing.

The movie played, but she wasn't paying attention. She was too busy watching him work. His hands moved with preciseness, applying just the right amounts of pressure and, surprisingly, not tickling her in the slightest bit. It was all about the rubdown.

She could only imagine what those hands would feel like on the rest of her body.
And soon enough she learned, as he looked at her with question before slipping her pant leg up and moving on to her calf. Now she really had died and gone to heaven.

"You have very nice legs," he spoke softly as he slid one finger up her shin, stopping to trace his fingertips along the underside of her knee.

Amanda moaned subtly in response. "You have nice hands," she said, "very nice hands." If he was trying to turn her on, it was definitely working.

And he obviously knew it as he chuckled softly at her response. "How's your head?" he asked, still kneading away.

"It's fine."

"The room's not spinning or anything?" he asked.

"No, I told you I'm not drunk. Wine just makes me a little dingy, that's all," Amanda explained.

"Is that why you almost fell when you got up from the table?"

"No, I was just testing you to see if you'd catch me." Amanda let her eyes close briefly as he moved on to her right leg. This was just too heavenly.

"Did I pass?" he asked.

"Hmmm, I haven't decided yet," she answered, her voice filled with pleasure. "I'll let you know when I figure it out, though."

JC smirked softly and released the three bottoms snaps on the leg of her pants.
Immediately Amanda's eyes popped open.

"Don't worry, I'm not trying to undress you," he remarked. Gently he pulled her into a laying-down position and then pushed her pant leg even higher, unclasping a few more snaps as he pushed it up past her knee. Her butt was practically resting against his thigh and her legs were completely strewn over his lap.

With skilled hands he began rubbing the upper portion of her leg and Amanda nearly crumbled into a million pieces. That aching desire she had already been feeling, intensified. She wanted him so badly she knew if he made one more move in the right direction she would definitely be giving in. There was no doubt about it.
For a split second, she did manage to be thankful for having her legs waxed at the salon the day before. It had been a painful process, but definitely worth it. She realized that now as his hands danced across her smooth skin.

Her eyes flitted closed once again and she relished in the pure delight of his handy work. Finally, after completely rubbing down both of her legs, he returned her pant legs to their intended position, refastened the snaps and rested his arms on top of her thighs.

Amanda could have easily fallen asleep after all that. If she hadn't have been so completely on fire, that is. Her body was screaming for more affection. At that moment, she was more turned-on than she had ever been in her life. Not that she had a lot to compare to, but still, it was a strong feeling, nevertheless.

She ached for him in her most sacred places, a desperate need swirling around in the lower region of her belly. Amanda was feeling things she had never felt before. And she was so desperate to feel more, so much more.

Slowly she sat up, pulling her legs off his lap and situating them Indian style, her body situated sideways and facing his direction.

"What?" he asked, realizing her stare.

As if he didn't know. That dumb act didn't work with her. "Nothing," she remarked.

"Then why are you staring at me?"

He was toying with her, and she knew it. It was almost as if he wouldn't make the next move because he wanted her to make it. Did he realize how difficult that was for her? Most likely not. How could he?

"No reason," Amanda answered.

"Oh."

"You really into this movie?" she asked. Okay, so maybe she was beating around the bush a little, but she really had no clue what she was doing.

"I've seen it before," he answered.

"Then how come you picked it?"

"'Cause, I like it." He turned to her with a blank expression. But it was a blank expression that said so many things. Yes, more than just my ‘lips are on fire will you please kiss them and put it out.' Although, that was the first thought that sprung to her mind. He so needed to be kissed. Those lips so needed to be kissed, by her.

Oh man, she was letting her thoughts run away again. If only she was more experienced. Then she would just climb right on top of his lap and kiss him the way those lips deserved to be kissed. If only she knew what she was doing, but she didn't.

"Hey," he said after a minute.

"Huh?" Amanda asked, shaking out of her daze.

"You should take a picture, it lasts longer."

She had no response but to roll her eyes to that cheesy remark.

"You know, I'm not letting you drink wine ever again. It makes you really-"

"Really what?" she asked after he didn't finish.

"Spacey," he finally told.

"Sorry, am I bothering you?" she asked.

"No, of course not," he answered with a smile.

"Okay, good."

"But, I really do wish-" he paused again and Amanda let out a big huff in waiting, "never mind," he finally shrugged.

Oh, that was just plain evil. "What?" she asked.

"Nothing, it was nothing." He turned his attention away from her and stared at the television.

"JC," she called to him, her sight burning into the side of his head.

"Huh?" He didn't even bother to look away from the movie as he spoke.

"What were you going to say? You really do wish what?"

"Never mind." He repeated, angling his head to glance over at her briefly.

"You are evil," Amanda whined, raising to her knees and, in the process, becoming much closer to his sexy, heat-radiating, touchable, muscular body.

"So, what are you going to do about it?" he asked, taunting her with each syllable.
Of course, Amanda just stared at him like a deer caught in someone's headlights. What was she going to do about it?

Finally, after her failure to respond, JC grabbed onto her arm and pulled her sideways onto his lap. "Jeez Amanda, are you really as innocent as you pretend to be?" His arm braced around her back and his face barely inches away, she was not only unable to answer his question, she seemed to be without any speech whatsoever. "I know it's been awhile, but come on," he continued, "you're a woman and women don't forget things like that."

Amanda continued to remain quiet.

"Unless I'm just way off here and you're not feeling what I'm feeling. But that can't be it, can it? You feel it, don't you?" he asked.

Oh, did she ever.

Out of the blue, she decided to just go for it. Sliding her hands to his neck, she eased her mouth to his and kissed him - and kissed him, and kissed him, and kissed him. And damn did it feel good.

It was then she realized, that being in control was kind of nice. Her fingers tangled into the thick tresses of hair at the nape of his neck as she kissed him even harder, sweeping her tongue between his lips and showing him just how much she did feel for him.

JC cradled her neck with his hand, his fingertips pushing into her flesh but with little force. Breaking away momentarily, he licked his lips and smiled. "I knew you had it in you," he told her.

But Amanda didn't want to hear it. She wanted to return to their passionate kisses. She nudged forward and he stopped her with his index finger pressed against her lips. "Wait," he said. "This is just a little uncomfortable."

"Oh, sorry," Amanda remarked shyly.

"It's okay," he replied, pushing gently on her right knee cap and guiding her leg to the other side of his lap. With one swift movement she was completely straddling him, which immediately sprouted a newfound awareness of exactly how much he really did want her. And it was resting very close to the place she wanted it most.

"Now," he said, "come here."

His arms slid around her back. Her breasts pressed up against his chest. They engaged in kisses full of passion and desire. All the while, the knowing that he really did want her faintly rubbing against a very sensitive place. At first she tried to avoid it, fearing she might crush him or hurt him. But it wasn't long before desire took over and she found herself writhing against him, wishing the boundaries of their clothing weren't so confining.

With each minute amount of pressure, small tremors shook throughout her body. And she reminded herself that they weren't even doing anything yet. Already it felt this good and they were fully clothed. Suddenly she decided that she didn't want to be innocent anymore. She wanted to know what a man felt like in every sense of the word. She wanted to know what this man felt like, every inch of him.

His mouth trickled down the side of her neck planting delicate kisses across her skin. Gently he nibbled and sucked as he worked his way towards her collarbone. His lip-work had been so delightful, she hadn't even realized that his hands had crept underneath her shirt. But now that she had, she reveled in the feeling of his hands pressed against her bare back. Those hands could work magic. Of that she was convinced.

A tiny moan escaped her and he pressed even harder against her, holding her body tightly against his own. "Touch me, Amanda," he said breathily. "I'm dying to feel your hands against my skin."

Without further hesitation, she quickly found the bottom of his t-shirt and inched her hands underneath it. His skin felt warm and inviting to touch. His body, strong and firm. A fact that was hard to miss as her palms passed over every dip and bump of his muscular abdomen.

She remembered the day she had found him dressed so scantily in his hotel room, with only a pair of pajama bottoms and nothing else. Thoughts of his gorgeous body had haunted her ever since and now she was able to touch and feel every inch she had dreamed about each night for the past week.

Slowly her hands progressed upwards to his chest, latching on to his pecks as she stopped their kissing just long enough to get a glimpse of the gorgeous body she was so appreciatively caressing. JC chuckled softly and ripped his shirt over his head, exposing his upper half completely as if he had read the request right out of her head.

"JC," she whispered softly, brushing her lips to his ear.

"Hmmm..." he sounded, as she swept her mouth to his flesh for a second time only instead touching down just below his earlobe.

"There's something I need to tell you." Even in her euphoric state, Amanda was realizing that if things were going to progress she didn't want them to progress without him knowing the truth. She had heard that a woman's first time could be painful and she was a little nervous about that. Even if she did want him more than anything she had ever wanted in her entire life.

"What sweetheart?" he asked tenderly, using the words that caused her whole body to melt. She molded against him and immediately had second thoughts. How could she make such an announcement? How could she share such a personal thing?
Of course, what they were heading towards doing was pretty damn personal.
Get a grip, Amanda, she told herself, just do it.

She couldn't bare to look him in the face if she was going to tell him, so instead she hugged onto him tightly, resting her head on his bare shoulder - his beautiful, perfectly shaped, bare shoulder.

Her eyes fell closed as he hugged her even tighter. "Baby, you can tell me anything. Don't be afraid." Now he was calling her baby, and she just wanted to freeze that moment in time and live in it forever. If he only knew that no one ever said those words to her, not since her mother had passed. She had been the only one to speak so affectionately towards Amanda.

"It's just that-" Amanda tried so hard to push the words out, but the sound failed to come out of her voice.

"It's just that what?" he asked. "We don't have to go any further if you don't want to. I won't be mad, I promise."

If it was at all possible to melt in his arms a second time, then she did. Could he possibly be any more caring or sincere? If he kept that up she'd be falling head over heels in love with the man. If she wasn't already. But that was not the point and definitely not what she wanted to be thinking about at the moment. This was about her finally knowing what it was like to really be with a man.

"It's not that," she admitted, her head still cradled in the crook of his neck. "It's kind of hard for me to say."

"Well, you don't have to tell me if you don't want to," he said.

"No, I want to."

"Okay, well just say it then. I promise whatever it is, I'll be okay with it."

"Okay," she said taking in a deep breath but still refusing to look at his face. "It's just that... I've never been with a man before, intimately." The words had been hard to say, but somehow she forced them through.

For a short time he was completely still, even though his arms remained wrapped around her snugly. The room was quiet, except for the sound of gunfire on the television. It was a strange backdrop for such a personal moment.

"That's what you were so afraid to tell me?" he finally asked softly.

"It's kind of embarrassing, you know? I mean, how many twenty-six year old virgins do you come across?"

He smirked softly and she felt the movement in his chest. Tenderly he braced a hand against the back of her head and pulled her softly from his shoulder. "It's nothing to be embarrassed about," he spoke sincerely, guiding her sight to his own.

At that moment she could feel the caring he possessed. The deep rooted compassion in his soul. It shot straight to her heart and filled it with something she had never felt before. If she hadn't of known better, she might have mistaken it for love.

"I'm glad you told me," he said, brushing a hand down her back and rubbing gently.

"This doesn't change things, does it?"

Tracing his fingers down the side of her neck, he grinned at her softly. "In a way, it does."

"Why? Do you not want to be with me now?"

JC smiled affectionately, a tiny peep of laughter escaping his vocal chords. "Trust me, that's not it."

"Well, what?"

"Sweetheart," he called her again, "I'm not going to let your first time happen in the heat of the moment, on the couch, when you've been drinking, and you're going to regret it in the morning."

"I won't regret it, I swear," she promised.

He chuckled quietly once again and touched her cheek softly. "I love your enthusiasm, I really do. But trust me, okay?"

Trust him? How about seduce him? That's what she really wanted to do. Especially since she was sitting on top of him, his bare chest staring her in the face and his obvious readiness to comply was just a slight movement away from where she wanted it most.

This was not what she had planned. Here she had geared herself up for it and he was telling her no. But he was a man, men weren't supposed to say no. They were supposed to be ready and willing. Well, he was ready. That much was pretty apparent, but the willing part didn't seem to coincide.

Amanda let out a disappointing sigh and JC responded with an amused laugh. "Don't be mad," he told her.

"Do you know how frustrating it is to be me?" she told him softly.

JC COULDN'T HELP but chuckle. The fact that Amanda was opening up to him was pleasing to say the least, although he did feel a little guilty for pressuring her. If he would have had any idea that she was a virgin, well, he definitely wouldn't have been making all of those sexually geared comments at her all night. He had no clue and when she revealed that secret, it sent him into a short state of shock. But it had only lasted a minute. Now he was more amused than anything at how desperately she wanted him. He was flattered that she would want him to be her first.

"Not really," he remarked, "but I could imagine."

"Yeah, well imagine it like ten times worse and maybe you'd be close."

"That's not my fault," he reasoned.

"In a way it is."

"And how is that?" he asked curiously as she trailed her fingernails softly down his chest. It was obvious that the girl had absolutely no idea how hard it was for him to resist her. He wanted her so badly it pained him, but he'd rather wait until it was absolutely perfect for her. That was just the kind of guy that he was.

"Because," she explained, still toying with his skin, almost as if she didn't even realize she was touching him, "you have the power to relieve my frustration."
With that comment he couldn't help but let out a full-on laugh. "Look at you," he told her, "an hour ago you were being all shy and now you're ready to tie me down and have your way with me."

He noticed the twinkle in her light eyes as she stared at him. It was as if he had given her an idea that hadn't even crossed her mind until then.

"I'm corrupting you, Amanda." JC remarked. "You'll never be that sweet, innocent hotel girl ever again."

"I'll still be sweet, I just won't be innocent."

With another chuckle, JC patted her gently on the behind and said, "okay, get up."

Amanda just looked at him with mild disappointment before doing as he requested.

"I have to go to the bathroom. Is that okay?" he asked, noticing the crushed look in her eyes. "I'll be right back. I promise."

JC watched her slouch into the sofa as he grabbed his t-shirt off the back of the couch and headed for the bathroom. Walking through his bedroom, he checked the LED screen on his cell phone to realize he had three voice messages. Hesitating, he almost didn't check, but then decided he better just in case. With the phone up to his ear, he went into the bathroom to do his business.

Chapter 12
When JC made way back into the living room a few minutes later, he found Amanda sprawled out lengthwise on the sofa, laying on her side, her head resting against the arm cushion and her eyes focused on the TV.

It had been obvious that she was a little hurt by his decision to stop their intimacy from going any further, but he knew it had been the right choice, at least for now. Maybe if she hadn't been drinking earlier he would have let things progress, but with the alcohol in her system he'd feel way too guilty if it happened under those circumstances. Besides, he'd hate to think she might resent him the next morning.

He wanted her first time to be absolutely perfect. And now that he knew he would be given that honor, he was bound and determined to make it that way.
But he did have an idea to make her feel a little better for the time being.
Kneeling in front of her, he brushed a hand across her cheek and kissed her sweetly. "You're upset?" he asked sincerely.

She looked up at him with her caring green eyes and it was obvious there were so many new things she was feeling. A part of him realized this could be very dangerous territory. That moving forward with her could cause many complications in his life, but he didn't care. He felt too strongly to deny himself.

"No, not upset," she answered softly.

"Disappointed?"

"Maybe, a little," she admitted.

"Don't be. It'll be worth it, I promise," he assured her. "Can I lay with you?" he asked.

"Okay."

Carefully JC slid behind her on the roomy sofa, his body fitting against hers with perfection. After settling in and fluffing a couple of pillows for his head, he stared at the back of her and pulled out the ponytail holder in her hair.

Amanda stretched to look at him from the corner of her eye. "What are you doing?" she asked.

"Shhh, watch the movie," he told her. Without question, she turned her head back around.

JC wasn't all that interested in the movie, himself. He was more interested in her.

Tenderly he ran his fingers over her scalp and through her long hair. Soft as silk, her tresses smoothed between his fingers, a light scent of vanilla releasing from the strands and seeping into his nose.

He toyed with her hair, teasing her neck with the tips of his fingers and watching with satisfaction as tiny goose bumps formed after every touch. Finally, lifting her hair away from the back of her neck, he let his hand fall down her arm and slowly inched his lips to her skin.

Softly she moaned as he tasted her with gentleness and ease. His hand slid to her waist and immediately found it's way underneath her thin shirt, aching to touch her bare skin.

Amanda felt the warmth of his touch and immediately froze. "JC, what are you doing?" The only thing she could think about was how he had told her no, and how now he was being a complete hypocrite by teasing her this way.
Although, his lips felt absolutely magnificent against her neck.

"Trust me," he spoke softly, tearing his lips away only long enough to speak.

All the while his hand pressed against her stomach and the length of his body rested comfortably against her back. "I'm going to make you feel better."
With those words, the speed of her heartbeat picked up ten times. He was going to make her feel better? Oh my, she could only imagine what that meant.

As his tongue delicately traced just underneath her ear, his fingers crept even higher beneath her shirt. Her eyes fell closed without thought. Her only ounce of concentration focused on the pleasure he was lavishing upon her. His fingers traced along the edge of her lacey bra and in turn her breath deepened, a soft moan escaping as she exhaled.

With grace and tenderness his strong hand cupped her breast as he brought his lips to her ear. "Trust me," he repeated in a breathy whisper, just before nibbling gently on her lobe.

Amanda's hormones were in such a frenzy that it was in no way possible for her not to trust him at that moment. All she knew was that she did not want him to stop touching her. That was the last thing she wanted. She turned onto her back to look him in the eye. "Just don't stop," she pleaded quietly, right before his lips crashed down upon her own.

Gently he tilted her head backward and worked his mouth down the front of her neck. Her fingers dug into the back of his head. Her hand tangling its way through his hair. But when his mouth lifted from her neck and skipped over to her stomach she nearly lost it. With perfection his tongue dipped across her navel before gliding up the center of her abdomen.

She was lost in a world of ecstasy as he worked his magic upon her, the warmth of his soft mouth making it's way towards her breasts. Her shirt pushed up to her arm pits, she realized how vulnerable she had let herself become.

She also realized how wonderful he made her feel.

JC stopped briefly to look into her eyes, his left hand fidgeting with the front clasp of her bra. He leaned in to her face and brushed his thumb down her cheek. "This isn't going to go as far as you think," he said quietly, "but I promise you'll feel a whole lot better afterwards."

Amanda only stared, peering up at him with glossy eyes.

"You trust me, right?" he asked again.

Completely breathless, she nodded her head yes.

"Do you even know how beautiful you are?" he asked, caressing the side of her face softly with his finger tips. "Of course you don't," he answered for himself, "you're gorgeous." He stared straight into her eyes as he spoke and Amanda knew that with those sweet words, he had gained complete control and there was nothing she was going to do to try and stop it.

He brought both hands to the clasp of her lacey, white bra and in mere seconds had it un-fastened. Instead of pushing it aside, he let it remain covering her as he continued to kiss up the center of her chest. Slowly, he pushed one hand underneath the sheer material and cupped her gently.

But what really got her, what really made her even hotter than she'd already been, was when his tongue trickled across her flesh, stopping at her nipple and taking it into his mouth, lightly sucking while his teeth brushed across its peak.

And while his lips continued with their concentration on her breasts, one hand gradually slid down her stomach heading straight for the very root of her desire. His fingers barely pushed underneath her waistband as he brought his face to hers, his lips hovering just above her mouth. He dipped his head down to kiss her deeply, his tongue sweeping inside of her mouth with a passionate force. Down below, his hand crept even closer towards the place where she ached for him the most.

The throbbing desire was nearly unbearable. He was driving her insane withhis slow, take-your-time pace. But somewhere in the back of her frazzled mind, she did manage to realize that he was moving slow because he knew what he was doing to her was so new.

And he was right.

Finally, his fingers slid underneath the lace of her panties to find her moist and ready. Amanda moaned loudly against his mouth as the sensation of his fingers in her most private place was almost too much for her to handle. With skill he rubbed her just the right way, all the while his lips taking control of her mouth and his tongue doing delicious things inside.

The tension building, her hips bucked to meet his hand and he carefully slid one finger inside of her. An even louder moan escaped her as JC touched and rubbed and seemed to press the very button that kept all that emotion trapped inside. She gasped for air, incredibly close to slipping over the edge.

"I want you to come," his sexy voice whispered into her ear, "I want you to feel the release. Let yourself go, Amanda. Let me tide you over until I can give you the real thing."

And as his mouth covered her lips, his hand massaging against her center, it hit. A thousand tiny explosions went off in her body, her muscles tightening and convulsing in a way she had never felt before. A way that felt absolutely amazing.

"That's it," he breathed, pulling away from their kiss while pressing harder against her, riding it all the way to the finish. "Just let it go."

Amanda gasped loudly, moaning with release and thrusting into his hold against her. Tremors of pleasure rolled through her body as she was taken to a place she had only imagined could exist.

Her breath heavy, she finally relaxed. JC kissed her tenderly, laying beside her and pulling her shirt back down over her chest. After a minute she turned to him, still breathless, and simply said, "oh my."

He cuddled even closer to her, his arm strewn over her side. Nuzzling her ear, he spoke softly, "Huh, that was just the beginning."
Stretching to kiss his sweet lips, she maneuvered a leg in between his, wrapping an arm around him and feeling the warmth of his chest pressing against her own.

"JC," she said softly.

"Hmm?" he sounded in reply.

"This isn't fair to you."

He looked at her with a wealth of knowledge lingering in his deep blue eyes before placing a kiss affectionately on her forehead. "This wasn't about me, it was about you."

"But I want to please you, too," she told him softly.

A broad grin spread across his lips. "Don't worry, you will," he assured her.

"Now," she added with confidence.

JC giggled quietly at her eagerness. "Do you know how many men would kill to hear words like that?" he asked.

"Most. Probably," Amanda guessed.

"I'd say a good ninety-nine percent."

"Are you part of that ninety-nine percent?" she asked with a curious smile.

"Maybe," he answered mischievously, "bet you'd like to know, wouldn't you?"

"Very much."

"We still have so much to learn about each other, Amanda. There's no need to rush." Brushing a hand across her brow, he caringly wiped the stray hairs away from her face.

Settling against him and relaxing her head close to his chest, Amanda realized that she had grown closer to him in just a few short hours than she had ever become to any man in her entire life. At that moment, being with him felt too right to be wrong.

JC WASN'T SURE how long he had been sleeping when his eyes opened to a dark living room. He did know that his legs were cramped and even though the sofa was pretty roomy, it wasn't roomy enough. Of course, the fact that he wasn't alone on the sofa could've had a lot to do with it.

Letting his eyes adjust to the darkness, he gazed at Amanda sleeping peacefully against him. Her delicate hand rested on his stomach, her head very close to his shoulder, and one knee just barely resting on his thigh. All of which seemed very comfortable to him - very comfortable and very right.

Why did this woman seem so right? He barely knew her. He had barely met her a week before. She could have some deep, dark secret hiding in her past. But then again, he imagined that she'd already confessed that deep secret to him earlier that evening.

He had wanted her before she had explained her innocence and he wanted her just as much now, if not more.

There was something about Amanda Ballard that was special and unique. Something that wouldn't let him ignore his feelings no matter how hard he tried. And, frankly, he didn't want to try and ignore them. All he wanted was to be close to her, a lot closer.

Tenderly he touched her warm cheek and whispered her name.
After a few seconds, and her not making a peep, he kissed her lightly on the temple. "Amanda," he whispered a bit louder this time.

The hand on his stomach tightened against him and her legs stretched towards the end of the couch. "Hmmm?" she groaned.

"Wake up, baby."

"It's too early," she moaned and curled up even closer to him than she had been before. The hand that had rested lightly on his abdomen before, spanned against his side as her arm laid comfortably over the top of him.

"Come on, sweetie." JC nudged her gently. "I'm all cramped up here. I can't sleep like this."

With heavy eyes, she looked up at him before understandably sitting up. "What time is it?" she asked, leaning forward and rubbing the sleep out of her eyes.

"I'm not sure," he answered, sitting-up beside her.

"Man," she whined, "my head hurts."

"Headache?"

"Yeah."

"You want me to call down and get you some aspirin?" he asked.

"No, I think I've got some."

Amanda stood and stretched, her hands reaching up towards the ceiling. All the while, JC's eyes locked on to her subtle but shapely curves. Curves that had been practically untouched except for by him. Huh, curves that had a lot of lost time to make up for. He had no problem with helping her in that department.
After a second, Amanda trotted off to her bedroom. JC gave her a little bit of a lead and then followed, grabbing a bottle of water on the way.

He caught her digging in her purse again, this time without her head in the closet. She pulled out a small bottle of aspirin, looking up to realize he was waiting in the doorway.

"Water?" he asked, handing the bottle in her direction.

"Oh yeah, thanks."

He stepped towards the desk she was standing beside and gave her the cool drink, watching as she chucked two small white pills in her mouth and took several big gulps of water.

"You better get some rest," he told her, "we've got a big day tomorrow."

"Do we?" she asked with a twinge of excitement.

He grinned at her enthusiasm. "Yeah, we do." Stepping up to her, he pulled her into his arms and embraced her affectionately.

Amanda let out a soft moan; the kind that made him want to squeeze her even tighter, the kind that made him want to scoop her up into his arms and carry her to the bed and have his way with her, the kind that made his heart flutter quietly in his chest.

"Let's just stay like this," she spoke quietly.

He really wanted to agree, but he couldn't. Caressingly he ran his hand over the top of her head, "sleep will make your headache go away."

Amanda didn't reply, she only wrapped her arms around him even tighter, holding on to him as if he was about to vanish and she would never see him again. That wouldn't happen. He would make sure of it.

After a brief moment, Amanda glanced up at him with her tired green eyes.
JC leaned down just enough to kiss her forehead. "Goodnight," he said softly.

"Goodnight."

Slowly letting her out of his hold, he smiled and walked towards the door.

"Oh," Amanda sounded suddenly.

"Huh?" he turned around with question.

"What time should I set the alarm for?"

"Whenever. We're not on a time schedule. Unless you plan on sleeping the whole day away."

"No, I usually wake up pretty early."

"Well, I'll see you in the morning then," he grinned, stepping outside of the door and holding on to the door handle.

"See you in the morning," she called back. Softly he shut her door and went to his room.

Damn, that had been hard. He shut his door and plopped down on the edge of the bed. That had been so incredibly hard. He really just wanted to lay with her in his arms for the entire night. Of course, that would have been difficult as well. Because what he really wanted to do was much more than just sleep. But he knew that not sleeping in the same bed then would make it that much better when they did, after they'd made love.

Yes, that will be a night that Amanda Ballard will never forget. And he had a strong feeling that neither would he.

AMANDA FELT A soft tickle across her face and shooed it away insistently, her eyes still heavy and closed and her brain only half registering that it was time to wake up. Another light tickle brushed across her nose and she twitched, brushing a hand to her face and rubbing away the pesky itch.

Wearily her eyes opened. There he was, sitting on the edge of the bed guiltily holding a piece of fuzzy foliage from the flowers on her nightstand and keeping the most devilish grin across his lips. "Good morning," he said with a smile.

Amanda only groaned and stretched underneath the bedding. It was then she realized she wasn't wearing a whole lot and was thankful, for some reason, that she was covered by blankets. The thin two-piece pajama set she was wearing didn't leave much to the imagination. Funny, she didn't even remember slipping into that the night before. Obviously she had.

"Ah, what's a matter sleepy head?" he said teasingly, "did you drink too much last night?"

"No," Amanda answered stubbornly, "what time is it?"

"It's after ten. Are you hungry? I thought we could go have breakfast."

"Can I shower first?" she asked.

"Um, I guess so," he remarked, tapping her nose with that soft piece of greenery for a third time. But instead of leaving her alone, he just sat there and in return Amanda stayed hidden underneath the covers. As if she had a reason to be shy after the night before. The night before? Oh, she had almost forgotten all about the night before. And here he was sitting on the edge of her bed. Looking as fine as ever, too, she might add. How was it that a pair of faded, worn-looking jeans and a plain t-shirt could look so good on a man?

"Can I get up?" Amanda finally asked.

"Please, don't let me stop you," he grinned devilishly.

The sparkle in his eyes made Amanda tingle from head to toe. She loved the way he looked at her. He made her feel so special every time his dark blue eyes graced their presence upon her.

"I'm kinda not, uh" she paused, re-thinking her words, "in my pajamas."

"You're kinda not in your pajamas?" he asked. "So what are you in then?"

Damn, that hadn't come out right. "No, I am in my pajamas," she corrected.

"Oh, well I've never seen pajamas before so I better leave and let you get in the shower," he remarked with sarcasm just before rising to his feet. "Don't make me wait too long," he told her, shoving the green stem back into the vase of flowers before leaving the room and shutting the door behind him.

Lord, what a way to wake up.

Amanda quickly rolled out of bed and fled to her bathroom. Her mind was in a whirlwind and her body was in a hurry because, like he said, she didn't want to keep him waiting too long. That was for sure.

JC SWITCHED ON the television and pulled a small container of orange juice out of the refrigerator, leaning against the bar as he drank the entire bottle in one shot.

His morning hadn't started off too great, but he was bound and determined to not let his unexpected wake-up call from Jessie get him down. He hated being woken up in the first place. The fact that it was her hadn't made it any better. Of course, he had taken the first giant step. He had told her that when he got home they were going to have to sit down and talk.

But if it was such a big step, how come he didn't feel any better about the whole thing?

Maybe it was because he was lying to her when he had said he'd be in the studio all day working with some up and coming girl group. Yeah, that had been a big lie. Without a doubt, Amanda was not a group and the two of them definitely weren't going to be in the studio all day.

A big part of it was the fact that he didn't want the whole Jessie ordeal hanging over his relationship with Amanda? Why couldn't things have started out with him having a clean slate? Oh, maybe that was because he had been living unhappily for the past six months just because he hated to stir things up or be the bad guy. Huh, now he was really going to be the bad guy.

Oh well. None of that was going to change the way he felt about Amanda. He just had to remind himself that everything would work out in the end. For some strange reason, he had faith that it would.

It must have been a good twenty minutes after JC had woke her up that he heard music pouring out from under Amanda's room door. For some reason, that brought a smile to his face. He imagined her in there, getting dressed and doing her hair, or doing whatever it is girls do when they get ready, and dancing away to - it sounded like, oh duh, it was the new Michael Jackson song. Ha, that brought an even bigger smile to his face.

Why did he have this incredible desire to teach her everything she seemed to have been so sheltered from all of her life? Not just that. More than that. He wanted her to experience all the things that she had never experienced, and not just sexually either, with him. He wanted to show her how much the world had to offer outside of her father's hotel. Amanda deserved so much more than being cooped up in the same building every day of her life. Even if that building did span an entire city block, it didn't matter. It just wasn't good enough for her.

Finally after another twenty minutes of waiting, Amanda appeared from her bedroom looking refreshed and ready to go. "I'm starving," were the first words to leave her mouth.

"Good, me too." JC agreed, almost unconsciously staring her down from head to toe. She seemed even more comfortable in her casual attire than she had the day before. Today she wore a pair of beige colored pants and a form-fitting sleeveless lavender top. A matching sweater hung neatly through her arm, resting against a straw colored purse and on her feet were a pair of thick-soled scandals that seemed to match her shoulder bag identically.
If he didn't know better, he'd have to question if it was even the same woman he had met just barely a week earlier.

"You look very nice," he said with a grin.

"Thanks," Amanda replied as she stepped towards him, "sorry if I took too long."

"I was just teasing you before," he assured her, "I know how women are. It's okay if you took 45 minutes."

Amanda watched as he picked up his room key, wallet and cell phone and slid them into his pockets.

"I did not take 45 minutes," she argued.

"You did, but that's okay."

They stepped into the hallway and Amanda suddenly realized one very important factor. "Um, JC. Where's Mike?"

JC looked at her with a look of enjoyment. "What?" he asked as the door shut softly behind them. "Are you nervous? Afraid I might get mobbed or something?"

"I don't know. Will you?"

He smirked softly and slid his hand into hers. "Don't worry," he said with a wink, "it'll be fine. I promise."

(c) 2001 BrandyRae

Chapter 13

It'll be fine, I promise.

Amanda wasn't so sure about that. But she did enjoy the fact that she was alone in a car with JC driving and for the first time it seemed like maybe they were on a real date. One without a chaperone. Honestly, she didn't think Mike cared for her too much anyway so she was glad he wasn't around.

"So, where are we going?" Amanda asked curiously.

"Just down the road to this little coffee shop. I eat there all the time when I'm in town," JC explained.

"And how often is that?" Amanda asked, trying not to fidget with the purse strap sitting in her lap, but she was in a new atmosphere and that always made her fidgety.

"Quite a bit, I guess. I'm here a lot for work and stuff."

"Yeah, I guess you would be," Amanda remarked, her eyes roaming around the roomy sport utility vehicle he was driving. She glanced down at her feet, noticing her pink toe nails. She wasn't used to wearing shoes that revealed her toes. Of course, Marcy had completely put together the outfit Amanda was wearing, but she had to admit it did look nice. JC seemed to like it, so she guessed it had done the trick.

Actually, she was starting to like dressing less formally. It made her feel a little less conservative.

Although, she could only imagine what her father would say about wearing something like this. But he wouldn't approve of Amanda's entire weekend so it didn't really matter anyway. Besides, she was tired of living the way her father wanted her to. Where had that gotten her? No where, that's where.

Amanda and JC made it inside the coffee shop and safely to their table without one screaming fan, an autograph or one picture taken. She was a little surprised after witnessing first hand what those girls were capable of. There were a few stares, but that didn't bother her too much.

JC had told her he was good at blending in. She couldn't imagine how that was possible being that she'd be able to spot the man in a heartbeat, but if he said so. He also had mentioned that he knew where and where not to go, which made a little more sense. It was Los Angeles after all and there were celebrities all over the place.

Over breakfast they talked a whole lot about nothing, and everything. Amanda found herself opening up to him more and more. She realized it especially when the topic of her mother came up. Explaining how she had been diagnosed with such a rare form of cancer and all the pain that she went through didn't seem so difficult with him.

And even though Amanda was able to talk about the worst time in her life without getting choked up or upset, it still hurt her very deeply. But she realized talking with him felt really good. Up until that point, she hadn't talked about it a whole lot. Even though nearly three years had passed. Amanda realized that besides her father, who she chose not to talk to, she didn't really have anyone who she could talk to. Of course there was the hotel staff, some who had been very close to her mother, but talking with them had been different. Yes, finally Amanda realized this was something that she had been needing for a long time.

For an hour and a half they sat in the busy little coffee shop and just talked. It was probably some of the best conversation Amanda had ever been a part of. She was learning a lot more about the man she was spending the weekend with, and vice versa. Of course, the more she learned, the more she liked.

"Well," JC sighed, "should I go flag down the waitress so I can pay the bill and we can go?"

Amanda snickered softly and said, "too late."

"What'd you mean too late?" he asked, a little confused.

"I already paid," Amanda announced, "about twenty minutes ago when I got up to use the bathroom."

He peered at her with mild disbelief. "You did not."

"No, I did."

Inwardly he grunted, stepping from their booth and reaching out a hand to help her up. Accepting it, she stood beside him watching as he pulled out a tan-colored leather wallet. "I'll get the tip," he said.

"No, I took care of that, too," Amanda revealed.

"You tipped her already, too?" he asked with a mix of both surprise and uneasiness.

"Yep."

"You're sneaky," he remarked, slipping his wallet back into his pocket and leading the way down the aisle.

"Yep."

"It won't happen again," he said simply and looked back to give her the most sobering look. She guessed he wasn't kidding when he said it wouldn't happen again. But if she had anything to do with it, it would. He had paid for their hotel room after all. She owed him.

It was after four in the afternoon when JC and Amanda stumbled back into their suite. They had laughed the entire ride up in the elevator and all the way down the hall. The funny thing was, Amanda couldn't even remember what had started it. All she knew was that it went from one thing to another to another and pretty soon they were just laughing hysterically for no reason in particular.

Immediately Amanda slipped out of her scandals, since they were now killing her feet, and collapsed onto one of the three couches.

"That old man was convinced that you were Sandra Bullock," JC gasped, his laughter still lingering as he plopped down on one of the other sofas, his head against one armrest and his feet on the other.

"I do not look like her," Amanda remarked, suddenly remembering where the laughter had stemmed from.

What a crazy old man he'd been. Insisting that Amanda just had to be "that cute, young lady from that movie with the bomb on the bus." Crazy old man.

"I agree," JC replied. "But it sure was funny."

Amanda watched as he stared up at the ceiling and then burst into laughter for the umpteenth time that day. "I can't believe he wouldn't leave without your autograph," he chuckled. "What did you write, anyway?"

"It said, I hope you're not upset when you find out that I'm really not Sandra Bullock, and I signed it with my name," she explained. "I really do feel sorry for that man. Someone's going to read it to him and he's going to be very disappointed."

"You burst his bubble. You should have just signed it Sandra or whatever." JC told her.

"I'm not a very good liar. I would have felt bad," Amanda explained. "Funny how out of all the places we went today, I'm the one who got asked for an autograph. Of course, it was because someone thought I was somebody else, but it's still pretty ironic."

"I signed a few," he revealed casually as he laid lengthwise with his hands resting behind his head.

"You did? When?"

"You were off in the bathroom or something," he answered.

"Oh."

"It was just a couple moms for their kids," he explained.

Amanda looked at him with a devilish smile. "Sure it was for their kids," she teased.

"What's that supposed to mean?" he asked.

"Oh, like you don't know."

"Know what?" he asked, sitting up straight, planting his feet on the floor and resting his elbows on his knees.

"About all the older women that want you."

"Oh, that? Yeah, I know."

He said it with such a straight face, Amanda couldn't tell if he was just being plain arrogant or if he was messing with her again. Finally a smile broke through and she knew he was only teasing her the way he so often did. She watched as he stood, made those few steps towards the sofa she was laying on, lifted her feet, sat down and then replaced her legs over his lap.

"I had a good time today," he told her.

"Me too," Amanda agreed, taking in a deep breath and reveling in the touch of her legs against his strong thighs. But she only lived it up for a second before scooting up and sitting straight, pulling her legs off his lap.

JC gazed at her with those penetrating blue eyes. Eyes that caused so many different emotions to flow through Amanda's heart and soul. Was this what love felt like? She didn't know, but she was beginning to wonder.

"Dinner reservations aren't till seven thirty. I thought we could just kinda kick back until then."

"Yeah, that sounds good," Amanda agreed.

Curiously he looked around the living room, obviously in search of something. After a few seconds, he turned to Amanda with question. "Do you know where the remote went?"

"No clue," she answered.

"Hmm," he sounded, looking around the room once more. "I wonder if it's in the couch somewhere."

"Could be," she remarked.

Amanda watched with fascination as he stuck his hand down between the cushions of the sofa. It had been the same couch they were laying on the night before, so who knew. But somehow, she had a good feeling his search would end up on her side of the couch and, of course, it was less than a minute later that her hunch proved to be true.

Like a cat he crawled to her on his hands and knees, still digging in the cushions while skillfully maneuvering his body very close to hers. "Ah ha," he finally said, pulling the object from the couch, "here it is."

Amanda had to wonder if that had been a set up. Of course he had found the remote, but he was still incredibly close - very, incredibly close. He looked at her with a playful grin while switching on the television set, his face just barely an inch away.

"I wonder how it got there," Amanda pondered.

"I don't know."

Just barely backing away, he kneeled in front of her and ran a hand over her knee. "I have something to give you before tonight," he revealed.

"Something to give me?" she repeated. Oh, a thousand thoughts sprung to mind with those words. None of them very lady-like. What exactly did he want to give her?

Besides the obvious.

"Yeah, do you want it now?" he asked, tracing his fingers over her knee cap while he spoke, almost as if he didn't even realize he was doing it.

"I don't know," Amanda answered, not sure exactly how she was supposed to respond to that.

"Well, yes or no?"

"What is it?"

Letting out a chuckle, he said, "I can't tell you that. You'll just have to see it."`

"JC," she sighed, "you've really done enough already. I mean, I don't know what it is you have for me, but I don't think I can accept it."

"Don't tell me that," he whined, leaning in closer and pushing his weight against her bent leg, still grasping onto that one knee. "You have to at least see what it is first."

"Is it you?" Amanda asked bravely, not even realizing those words had seeped from her mouth until it was already too late.

Amused, he grinned widely, "if it were, would you accept?"

She tried desperately to keep a straight face, but it was tough. How could she deny that one. She was, after all, the one who had brought it up in the first place. But with the compromising position he had her in, what did he expect. "Um," she paused, breaking his glance and looking briefly up above, "yeah."

"Good," he smiled, "but that wasn't it."

Oh well, at least now she proved to him that it hadn't been just the alcohol talking the night before.

"So, did you want it now?" he asked again, leaning in so close that the weight of his chest pressed against her shin as he braced himself with one arm against the back of the couch and the other wrapped around her leg.

Amanda just stared at him, hopelessly.

"Am I hurting you?" he asked after a quiet second.

"No."

"Well?" he asked again.

"Okay, fine." She gave in, realizing he was going to keep her locked there until she did anyway. Although, maybe that might not have been such a bad thing.

"Good, it's in your room," he revealed.

"Oh. So, I have to get up?" she asked, perfectly aware that he hadn't budged one bit.

"Well, yeah."

"Oh, okay." But Amanda didn't move and neither did he. Until he pulled that bent leg of hers straight and managed to somehow maneuver it along the side of him. As much as she knew she was supposed to be getting up at that point, her body just wouldn't budge. It was way too easy to get lost in the aura of him. At that moment, she didn't want to step out of it.

JC WAS DYING to kiss her. No, not just kiss her. What he really wanted was to take her to his bed and devour her. To show her all the things she wanted him to show her. To touch her the way she so desperately deserved to be touched. To make love to her. Sweet, slow, passionate love.

But that would come later and that's why he was holding back. He was afraid just one kiss might make him lose control and up until now he had been doing a damn fine job at keeping that. He'd hate to lose it now, when dinner was only a few hours away.
Tonight he would give her the world. Well, as much of it as he could anyway. Everything would be about her tonight. He wanted to make it as special as possible. Something that she would remember forever.

The two had shared a great day together. Amanda had opened up to him and really been herself. It had been a fun day filled with laughter and a lot of playful flirting. Even though they hadn't done a whole lot besides eat and shop, it had been one of the best days he'd had in a long time. Just being in her company seemed to make him smile. She really brought out that playful side of him. It had disappeared for awhile and he had forgotten how good it felt to be goofy and just have a good time. Lately things had been so serious. Amanda made him realize that it wasn't good to just be serious all the time. She may not have realized that she made him see that, but she did. And he was thankful for that.

"Um, I guess I should get up." Amanda finally spoke.

"Good idea," he agreed with enthusiasm.

"Okay," she said, sliding her leg out from behind him and rising to her feet. He followed her, hoping that the reaction she'd get from learning he'd bought her that dress he'd caught her in that day would be a good one, not a bad one. He couldn't help himself. She just had to have that dress. Hopefully she wouldn't freak out like she had that day, but he was pretty positive they were way past that stage.

But her reaction wasn't what he'd expected at all. She looked at the dress lying neatly on the bed and then glanced back at him behind her. Then she laughed. A flirty, girlish laugh that sparked his curiosity to say the least. "Um, you don't like it?" he asked unsurely.

Amanda didn't answer. She smiled at him widely, giggling softly and walking towards her closet. Swiftly she opened the sliding door and pulled out the same exact dress, which was strapped neatly to a wooden hanger.

JC didn't know what to feel. His emotions collided somewhere between idiocy, irony and amusement. But he had to smile, it had obviously amused her and at least they had been on the same wave length. "You already got it," he chuckled softly, "that figures."

"It was a very nice thought, though," Amanda grinned.

"Well, now you have two," he concluded.

"What am I going to do with two of the same dress?" she asked, returning the one she'd purchased to the closet and shutting the heavy door.

"If one gets ruined, you have a backup," he said.

"I don't see how it would get ruined. I think you should take yours back because I don't want you to buy me anything, anyway. You've already done enough with the room and all."

Without warning, JC grabbed her by the wrist and pulled her into his arms. "That's not the answer I was looking for," he told her, "you're supposed to say thank you."

"Thank you," she responded appreciatively.

"So, you plan on wearing that tonight?" JC stared down at her with a devilish grin as he held her captive in his arms. That really was the only thing on his mind. Amanda in that dress - well, at least for a little while.

"What do you think?" she asked.

"I think I'll have a hard time controlling myself with you in that dress," he revealed seductively.

"Should I not wear it then?" she asked with a playful grin.

"No, you should definitely wear it." With that, Amanda stretched up to meet his lips, catching him a little off guard and not having any clue whatsoever how badly he was dying to just throw her down on the bed right then and there.

But he indulged in her for a moment, basking in the silky-smooth softness of her lips against his mouth. Her kisses were sweet yet passionate. They were laced with hunger and desire, but also a speck of innocence. Amanda was holding back and he knew it. She wanted to be more aggressive with him, but she was still a little unsure.

Tonight he would make certain that she understood there was nothing for her to be unsure about.

He pulled back and stared into her soft green eyes. "We better go back into the other room," he told her.

"Why?" she asked, her lips swollen and inviting, tempting him in the worst ways.

Tempting him without even realizing that they were tempting him.

"Because, it's not safe in here," he explained.

Amanda let out a soft smirk, her brow crinkling in the center of her forehead. "What'd you mean it's not safe?" she asked.

"Just trust me, okay?" JC let his arms slide out of their hold and instead intertwined his fingers in-between her more soft and delicate ones. Then he pulled her into the living room and planted her on the sofa.

For the next two hours JC tried to preoccupy himself with thoughts other than Amanda. That feat, he realized, was incredibly tough. Maybe he should have planned their day better so they would have been busy all the way until dinner. Maybe then he wouldn't have found himself fighting off urges to kiss her and touch her and - uh, there he went again. His mind was out of control.

Maybe it was just the anticipation that was killing him, the mere fact that come tonight he would know Amanda Ballard in every sense of the word. He would know her intimately. He couldn't wait.

The minutes ticked by in a slow torturous fashion. It took all of his strength to not say screw dinner, let's just stay here and get to know each other better. Huh, what a corny line that would have been. Okay, he better just stick with dinner.

Finally, just around six o'clock, Amanda announced she was going to get ready for dinner and left JC alone while she disappeared into her bedroom. He breathed an immediate sigh of relief. It wouldn't be long now before their night would begin. He was antsy already, but at least he wouldn't have to hold back much longer. For that moment, he was counting down the seconds.

Chapter 14

Amanda stared at her image in the mirror, trying to get used to her glamorous look. Actually, she was amazed she had pulled it off. That slinky black dress he had caught her in by accident days before was now fitted against her body as if it had been made just for her. Amazing. That was all she could think. Who would have guessed she could ever look so...pretty. She certainly didn't. But she couldn't argue the fact that she was very pleased with her appearance. Probably more so than she'd ever been.

Well, tonight was definitely the night for confidence. She needed it anyway, very much.

And thankfully she was feeling pretty damn good. Instead of being nervous, she was excited. The last twenty-four hours with JC had probably been the best time she'd ever spent in her entire life. He made her feel things she'd only imagine she could feel and he treated her like a princess. No one had ever treated her that way. No one except her mother.

But even then, that was different. That was in a motherly sort of way. This was in a gentlemanly sort of way. Whatever you wanted to call it, she liked it. That was for sure. And even though somewhere in the back of her mind she knew their fairy tale weekend would soon be coming to a close, she didn't let it ruin her good mood. The fact that she had chosen to be blind regarding certain circumstances of their strange relationship remained okay with her for the time being. For once in her life, she was thinking of herself and no one else. She wanted this and she wasn't going to let anything or anyone stand in her way.

Dabbing on her light pink lipstick and applying just a smidgen of gloss, she studied her reflection one more time. She was ready. This was it.

JC HAD TAKEN HIS time getting dressed. He was draped in all black, shying away from the suit and tie, deciding it would have been too formal. Instead he wore simple black slacks and a fitted black shirt. Tonight he didn't want to draw any attention to himself and wearing black was definitely part of the key. Hopefully it would help him to blend in.

Her bedroom door slowly creaked open and he took in a deep, anticipating breath. It was finally here. Their night of magic would now begin.

Amanda took one step out of her bedroom and his breath stopped short. Wow. The only word that could even come close to describing what he felt with just one look at her. Amanda was breathtakingly beautiful. She smiled at him and he could have sworn he felt his knees weaken.

It played out like a scene from a romantic movie as she stepped towards him slowly, her auburn hair cascading around her shoulders and that clingy black dress hugging her body just enough to show off her delicate curves, but without showing off too much.

She tossed the coat that had been strung through her arm onto the back of the sofa and stood in front of him as if she was waiting for his approval.

Taking her hand, he brought it up to his lips and kissed it affably. "You look gorgeous," he told her with a smile. A far too cheesy smile, he imagined, because something about her standing so close made him just a little over excited.

"Thanks," Amanda grinned, "so do you."

Not only did Amanda look great, he was now realizing that she smelled great, too. Something that reminded him of spring time and fresh flowers. But it wasn't an overpowering scent, it was just enough to make him want to pull her in closer and wrap his arms around her. To wrap his arms around her and feel the sheerness of that dress and the warmth of her body underneath it. Yeah, that's what he really wanted.

"Should we go?" he asked.

"I'm ready," she answered with a cheery smile.

Together they stepped into the hallway. JC's hand casually slid into hers, the door shut behind them and they slowly strolled towards the elevator.

"So where are we going?" Amanda asked curiously.

"Dinner. You hungry?" he asked, glancing at her from the corner of his eye. Even that split second glance nearly knocked his socks off.

"Mmmm, very," she answered.

Why was it that sweet sounding humm made him ache all over? And not in a bad way, either. There was just something about her soft sultry voice that made him want to hear it more often and in much more intimate ways.

"If you even try and pull a stunt like you did this morning at breakfast, you will be in big trouble," he threatened, but with a playful grin.

"What if I do?" she asked challengingly.

"You won't"

"How do you know?" she asked. "I do still owe you. I mean, you paid for the room and all, and I know it was expensive."

JC took in another deep breath as they stopped in front of the elevator doors. Gently he dropped her hand and reached for the button on the wall. "Amanda," he called to her, "you do not owe me. Look, I didn't even pay for the room. If you really must know." He was lying, but she didn't have to know that.

"You didn't?" she asked curiously, doubt lingering in her tone.

"No. It was comp'd"

"It was?" she asked cynically.

"Yes," he confirmed.

"I don't believe you," Amanda remarked as the shiny brass doors slid open. An older couple stood towards the back of the elevator, both smiling as JC and Amanda walked in.

With the other occupants so close, JC didn't argue her thoughts, he instead remained quiet. The doors opened at the lobby, and JC once again took her hand and led her towards the car that was waiting for them out front.

Of course, he could have gone all out and rented them a limousine for the night, but that would have drawn more attention to them and he didn't want that. So instead they'd be riding in the same rented SUV they had been in earlier.

With complete chivalry he opened her door and lent her a hand as she stepped up into the oversized vehicle. With a grin, he shut the door and walked around to his side of the car.

AMANDA FELT LIKE she was floating on a cloud as she watched him through the windshield walking around the front of the car towards the driver side door. He looked amazing in all black and she couldn't help but notice how his shirt fit just tight enough to show off the muscle definition in his arms. It made her want to just reach out and grab onto one of his biceps. She had always had a thing for guys with nice arms. She'd have to make up some kind of excuse to do that sometime during the evening. Her fingers were just itching to touch him.

JC hopped into his seat, started the car and cautiously pulled out onto the street. With every quiet second that passed, Amanda realized she was falling way too hard and way too fast for this man. And the scary thing was, they hadn't even done anything yet. Or maybe she should say, they hadn't done it yet. She had a good feeling that would change later, and she had no plans of stopping it. None at all.

The entire fifteen minute ride to the restaurant was quiet. Just the soft music of a local radio station playing in the background. Amanda was starving, but she had a good feeling that her stomach wouldn't let her eat too much. It was too busy to eat. Her nerves were working overtime tonight because of the anticipation of what was to come later.

She wouldn't quite say that she was nervous, although maybe just a little bit. It was more like anxious and excitement. Honestly, she just was way too thrilled to be spending time with him. To think only a week before her feelings were merely a crush and now they had grown into something much, much deeper. A week ago she was jealous and envious of some other girl who claimed to be his. Tonight she was...well, ignoring that whole fact, actually, but she wasn't the least bit jealous or envious anymore, that was for sure.

JC just didn't seem like the kind of man who would cheat on a girl just to cheat. Amanda believed him when he told her that he didn't have feelings for that other girl anymore. She had managed to misplace that whole factoid of information from her head for the past two days, she had no clue why now of all times it had popped back in. Maybe because some where in her mind, somewhere deep in a corner behind some locked door, was a little bit of guilt for spending time - romantic, intimate time with someone else's boyfriend.

Oh well. It wouldn't stay that way for long. She was sure of it.
Amanda knew instantly when they pulled up to the valet parking that dinner would be very nice. It was more than likely a five star restaurant. Carefully she stepped out of the car, her three inch heels cooperating, thankfully, and waited as JC stepped quickly to her side. He gave her his arm and Amanda gracefully took it, sliding her arm through the crook of his elbow.

A crisp breeze blew over her as they stepped just a few feet towards the entrance where a tall, slender door man was waiting with a cordial smile. A storm was on its way in, according to the weather man, and Amanda was thankful that she had worn a long coat over her sexy dress. Of course, she didn't get quite the same reaction with the coat on, but that was okay. It was worth being warm.

They made way inside, greeted by yet another tall man in formal attire. This one standing behind a podium and looking at them from the tops of his narrowed eyes. His chin tilted up and a near-cordial smile appeared across the man's thin lips. "Good evening," he said.

"Reservation for Chasez," JC spoke softly.

"Yes, of course." The man handed two menus to a woman who had just stepped up beside him. "Marcella will show you to your table."

With her hand clutched lightly against JC's, Amanda walked with him as they followed Marcella to their table. Somewhere in her mind, the thought occurred to Amanda that maybe she should feel strange being seen with such a public person. Maybe if she were at home she would, but here she didn't. Even though there were a few stares locked in their direction, it didn't bother her. The truth was, she didn't know any of these people and chances were she'd never see any of them again.

Tonight she was full of confidence and nothing was going to intimidate her.

The couple was seated at a fairly private table towards the back of the restaurant. The lighting was dim, with a candle set in the middle giving the table a soft glow. Amanda took her seat across from JC after the young lady who had sat them took her coat. She ignored the fact that she almost felt a little naked without it and remembered how good she looked instead. It wasn't that the dress was too short or too revealing, although it did have a very low back, but that she didn't mind, it was the fact that the material was so sheer and that she was so bare underneath. It felt so light against her skin she had to keep checking to make sure it was still there. Of course, it was.

JC reached for her hands across the small table and leaned in close enough to whisper. "You don't know how hot you look in that dress."

Amanda could feel herself blushing. After all, she had no idea how she was supposed to respond to that. Did she say thank you? She just wasn't used to such obvious kinds of attention, but she was definitely starting to like it, there was no doubt about that.

Luckily JC didn't give her a chance to respond, he leaned back into his chair and picked up his menu. "No wine for you tonight," he told her,

"you're too much of a lightweight."

"Am not," Amanda argued with a smirk.

He huffed and glanced at her for a second time. "Yes, you are."

Amanda knew what he was really saying. He was really saying, ‘tonight I want to do all the things you wanted me to do to you last night but I couldn't because you'd been drinking and I'd have felt too guilty.' That's what he was really saying, which was perfectly fine with her.

She stared into her menu, not having a clue what to order. Her lack of decision making had nothing to do with the gourmet meals that were listed, of course, without prices. Although that might make some people nervous, with her background in the hotel and restaurant business, she knew what was what and what she liked. The fact that there were no prices listed may have bothered her if she had never seen that before, but in all truth she had been to many fine restaurants such as this one and eaten at probably some of the most exquisite places in the world. Her mother had always been insistent that Amanda go out and travel. To see the different parts of the world. And she had. 

Of course all that had come to a screeching halt when her mother had become ill.

With that thought, Amanda looked over the top of her menu across at the handsome man whom she could safely refer to as her date. He looked up immediately, noticing her stare and grinned at her charmingly. The flickering candle light reflected in his dark blue eyes and Amanda had to force herself to not stare so boldly. His eyes captivated her in the most endearing ways. There was so much emotion hidden behind them, she could feel it every time he graced his eyesight upon her.

"Penny for you thoughts," he remarked, placing his menu neatly beside his place setting.

"I was just thinking of the summer I spent in Europe," she told him, "for some reason this restaurant kind of reminds of that trip."

"So when was that?" he asked curiously.

"Oh gosh," Amanda remarked, thinking back to that two and a half month trip. "I guess it was about five years ago."

It was soon after their waiter came to take their order. Amanda carried on about her traveling days, JC obviously able to relate. They had actually both traveled many of the same places, which wasn't too surprising since JC had been just about everywhere.

By the time their dinner was served, Amanda realized even more how much the two shared in common. There love for music being one major aspect, and Amanda losing herself just a bit in the conversation as she once again found herself carrying on about her mother. Or maybe it was his eyes she was losing herself in because he stared at her like he could completely read her soul. It warmed her so much that she wouldn't even need that jacket by the time they left.

In the car after dinner, Amanda waited until they were safely driving down the street before leaning over the center console, placing her hand on his forearm and reaching to kiss his cheek. "Thank you," she said, "dinner was very nice."

He looked at her with a pleased grin as she returned to her seat.

"You're welcome," he smiled.

"So where are we going now?" she asked curiously.

"Huh, wouldn't you like to know?" he remarked teasingly, glancing at her only for a second and then returning his attention to the road.

"Well, yeah. That's why I asked."

"You'll see," he told her.

"You're just full of surprises tonight, aren't you?" Amanda replied, pulling her coat around her shoulders a little tighter.

"You have no idea," he said with a mischievous grin. "Are you cold?" he asked, giving her a quick glimpse.

"A little."

Without question, he reached to switch on the heater. "Don't worry, it won't be cold where we're going."

Amanda wasn't exactly sure what that meant. She hoped it had something to do with being really close to him because that would definitely keep her warm. One thing she did realize was they definitely weren't heading back in the direction of the hotel.

It was a good twenty minutes later when they pulled up to what looked like some sort of bar or night club. The neon sign above the dark building read The Blue Oyster.

"Is this it?" she asked curiously.

"Yeah, we'll have to park a couple blocks down, though. It looks like the place is pretty full."

"It is?" Amanda didn't see any people around, how could he tell it was full?

"Yeah, look at all the cars." Oh, well yeah. That was true, there were a lot of cars lined up and down the street. But there was no line of people outside like you'd usually see at a night club.

"Is it safe?" she asked as JC parked a little ways down from their destination.

Letting out a soft smirk, he put the car in park and turned off the engine. "Of course it's safe," he assured her. Unclasping his seat belt, he turned towards her and leaned his elbows into the center console.

"Come here," he said.

Amanda leaned in towards him and he embraced her as best he could with that stupid leather console in the way. It didn't matter, his arms around her still felt absolutely wonderful. She took in a deep breath of that tantalizing cologne of his and meshed against the warmth of his body. Suddenly she didn't feel cold anymore, at all.

"Trust me," he told her, "you'll like this place."

"Okay," she agreed as he let her out of his hold.

"Wait there," he said, "I'll come around."

"Okay," she remarked once more as he hopped out of his seat and hurried around to her side of the car. Like a true gentleman, he opened her door and took a hand to help her out. "Thanks," she grinned.

"You're welcome."

"I still don't understand why we're going to a bar when you're not letting me drink," Amanda remarked as they were only a few feet from the entrance.

"Were not here to drink," he told her, "we're here for the music."

"The music?" she asked curiously.

"Yes, trust me." He said once again.

Entering through the front door, immediately Amanda understood. It was a jazz club, fairly crowded, with the music of a small band playing on a stage that took up nearly a quarter of the space in the bar. It was a tiny place, but the music hit straight into Amanda's soul. How did he know that she loved jazz? Duh, she remembered he had seen her CD collection. No wonder.

The warmth of his arm spanned across her shoulders as he leaned in close to the side of her face. He placed a soft kiss just in front of her ear and then whispered, "let's go sit down."

Amanda was too dizzy to agree. His tenderness made her head spin. With his arm still wrapped around her, he guided her to an empty booth very close to the stage where the two of them sat down, very close as well. She slipped her arms out of her coat and let it fall behind her, because as he had said, it was rather warm inside the club.

As her jacket fell and the dress was once again revealed, JC gave her the most devilish grin. A look that made her insides dip and twist. Honestly, she could have easily said let's forget the club and go back to the hotel - now. But she was enjoying the music and she knew it would be better for her food to settle a little before things heated up. Besides, just sitting beside him was a pleasure in itself. Especially the way his knee kept brushing softly against her leg - her bare leg.

They ordered their non-alcoholic drinks and watched the band play its soulful tunes, Amanda finally making the opportunity to touch one of those bulging biceps. He hadn't exactly given her an excuse, she just decided that she wanted to touch him and was pretty damn sure that he wasn't going to complain. And, of course, he didn't.

After the band finished their first set, the guitarist/vocalist made his way straight for JC and Amanda. As the man neared, JC smiled and stood, and the two men exchanged one of those half hand shakes half hug sort of things that men do. Obviously, Amanda realized, they knew each other.

After a "hey man, good to see you," from the other gentleman and a closely related response from JC, the man sat down and JC introduced him to Amanda.

"Nice to meet you, Jamie." Amanda smiled and praised the band on their talent.

He grinned and thanked Amanda for the compliment. The two men chatted for a few minutes before Jamie said goodbye, thanks for coming and then left the table.

The club seemed to fill with voices as the juke box played while the band was on break. JC leaned into Amanda, brushing his lips lightly against her ear. "Did you want to stay for another set or should we go?" he asked, his hand falling against her thigh.

Of course she wanted to leave, especially with the warmth that had just fallen over her thanks to him. But she also didn't want to seem overly excited. "We haven't been here very long," she answered.

"I know," he remarked, his lips barely a breath away from her ear, "I'm just anxious to have you all to myself," he confessed.

Amanda turned to respond, but before she could open her mouth he planted a kiss square on her lips. She could feel her insides turning to mush as his soft lips moved with perfection against her own. Instantly she was putty in his arms.

Slowly he pulled away. Amanda licked her lips, almost subconsciously, the taste of him still lingering on her skin. "Okay," she said with a breathless sigh.

Tenderly he brushed his fingers across her cheek. "I'm not trying to rush you," he assured her, "if you want to stay longer we can."

"Are you kidding?" she asked. "Let's go."

THE COUPLE MADE way out of the club and walked the short two-block distance to the car. JC kept his arm around Amanda the entire walk, his warmth doing a much better job than her coat. Only a few steps from their ride, he disarmed the alarm and reached to open Amanda's door. But before she could hop in, he wrapped his arms around her and hugged her so tightly she could hardly breath. "Why is it that every second I spend with you is better than the second before?" he asked softly.

Amanda didn't answer, but in her mind she was feeling the exact same way.

He held onto her for a good minute before finally letting go, waiting for her to climb in before shutting her door. Amanda's head was in such a daze, it was a good thing she wasn't driving. Who needed alcohol? The man was more of an aphrodisiac than any liquor or drug. He sent her head into a complete spin with every touch he gave.

Every look, every word spoken as he drove back to the hotel exuded a caring that Amanda couldn't miss. So far the night had been everything she could have possibly dreamed of. Even if things went no further, it would be a night she would undoubtedly remember for the rest of her life.

As they pulled into the valet parking at the front of the hotel, Amanda glanced at the clock in the dash, noting it was just after ten p.m. She hated to think that she was flying back home at noon the next day.

She stepped down from the car and onto the curb, JC quickly appearing at her side. He took her hand, his face leaning in towards hers, undoubtedly for a kiss, until suddenly he stilled and looked over her shoulder. Looking back at Amanda, he grinned and reversed his movement. "Let's go inside," he said softly.

Once the two had made it safely inside the elevator, JC leaned against the back wall, Amanda only a step away and her hand still locked loosely in his. "There were people watching us," he revealed, "outside."

"Oh."

"You'd think I'd be used to that, but sometimes it kinda bugs me," he confessed.

"I think that it's pretty normal that it does," Amanda told him.

"Yeah, you're probably right," he agreed. Carefully he yanked her hand and pulled her to him, his arms sliding around her waist. "There's nobody watching us now," he said with a wink.

"Just security," Amanda replied. "You know they have cameras in here."

"Yeah, but that's different," he said, just before closing in and kissing her tenderly. His hands sliding casually down her back and onto the curve of her backside, his entire body pressed against her as their kiss grew more passionate, so passionate that they almost missed their floor.

The bell dinged, but it wasn't until the doors slid open that they realized it had stopped. Thankfully no one was there waiting.

The walk down the hall seemed ten times longer than it had before.

Maybe it was because they were both in such a hurry. Finally stopping in front of their suite, JC unlocked the door to unveil a pitch dark room.

"Close your eyes," he told her.

"Why? I can't see with ‘em open." Amanda remarked.

"Just do it."

So she did.

"Don't move," he told her and she could tell by the distance in his voice that he had moved away from her.

"Okay," she called out. Her curiosity was driving her crazy. What was he doing?

After another minute or two, she felt a tender touch against her shoulder. "Keep ‘em closed," he repeated.

"I am, I am," she assured.

His palm slid down her arm and into her hand. "Okay," he said, "this way."

"Can I look?" she asked curiously.

"No, I'll tell you when."

"Okay, well don't let me run into anything."

"The only thing I'd let you run into is me," he replied, "trust me."

Their journey was short because it was only a few seconds later when they stopped. Amanda was guessing they were in his bedroom just from the direction they had gone. "Don't open ‘em yet," he told her.

"Okay."

Her eyes still closed at his request, she breathed in deeply at the feel of his smooth lips against the side of her neck. Instinctively her head fell back as his mouth danced towards her jaw line, placing delicate kisses across her flesh. As his lips finally met hers, her hands slid to his neck, tangling in his hair as a soft whimper escaped from her voice.

"Okay," he said, backing away. "You can look now."

Slowly Amanda opened her eyes to find the flickering glow of candlelight illuminating the room. She glanced over at JC as he stepped away from the portable radio where he had just turned on some soft music, and as headed his way back towards her.

He had created the mood and now Amanda found herself just a teensy bit nervous.

JC didn't say a word as he stepped to her, closing what little distance had been between them and placing a hand on her waist. His eyes studied her face, as if he were reading her emotions. Then his lips crashed down upon hers as if they were too hungry to wait one moment longer.

Immediately that tiny piece of nervousness disappeared. Amanda remembered quickly how bad she wanted this - no, how bad she wanted him - once he laid his touch upon her. Her heart raced inside of her chest as she let herself get lost in his world.

But it wasn't just his passionate kisses that made her ache with want, it was the way he touched her with such tenderness and grace. How his fingertips floated across her skin like a feather. How his body pressed against hers with need, but at the same time with gentleness and comfort.

JC pulled away from her lips, tracing his fingers down the side of her face. "This is what you want, right?" he asked softly.

Amanda only nodded her head yes.

"Do you know what I want?" he asked, looking her straight in the face with those caring blue eyes.

"What?" she asked quietly.

He placed a kiss on her flushed cheek, and then one right beside her ear. "I want to make love to you," he whispered, the warmth of his breath tickling her skin, "sweet, passionate love. Then I want to hold you in my arms all night long and wake up with you beside me in the morning. That's what I want."

Had he read her diary? Not that she kept one, but if she had that would have been in there. That was exactly what she wanted. How did he know?

Too mystified to respond, she only moaned softly under her breath and pulled him to her lips, kissing him hard and deep.

Amanda felt his smile against her mouth as he kissed her, but when he suddenly scooped her into his arms she was caught a little off guard.

With a high-pitched giggle, she let him carry her those few steps to the bed where he laid her down gently and knelt beside her. Skillfully he kicked his shoes off his feet and onto the floor, his eyes not leaving Amanda for a second. He studied her from head to toe, as if he were creating an image in his mind that would last him a lifetime.

Teasingly he traced one fingertip down her shin before removing both of her strappy heels and placing them on the floor. Amanda just stared at him with wide eyes as he moved to lay down partly beside her and partly on top of her.

The weight of his body against hers was a comforting feeling. With him so close, it made everything feel so right. She knew that this was the right choice. Her heart would never steer her wrong.

Brushing her hair from her face, he kissed her passionately, his body molding against hers. Amanda reached to touch him as he devoured her with kisses. She latched onto his arm, wishing there was no clothing in the way of his bare skin. He had felt her. He'd had a head start. Amanda wanted to feel him, every part of him.

JC WAS TRYING so hard to move slow, but when she touched him he had to fight the urge to rip off her clothing and take her right then and there. He had envisioned this moment since the first time they laid eyes on each other and now that it was here he was having an extremely hard time keeping it together.

In all honesty, he couldn't remember a time when he had wanted a woman so badly. There was something about Amanda that made him ache in the worst ways. He had been dying to feel her touch ever since that first night they had kissed on her sofa. Even before then he had imagined her hands on his body and his lips against his skin, kissing him everywhere. But Amanda had remained composed and now he understood why. Tonight he would show her that nothing she could ever do could possibly turn him off. The mere sight of her alone made him hard, a fact she was probably beginning to realize after spending the entire weekend with him.

"I want you so badly," he whispered into her hair as his lips crept to her skin, fluttering down her neck seductively.

"I want you, too," she said breathily.

With that he ran his hand down the opposite side of her neck, skipping over the halter neckline of her dress and moving on to her bare shoulder. Slowly Amanda's hand was creeping down his chest, and with every ounce of pressure she applied, his desire grew.

Lifting his body away from hers, he ripped both his dress shirt and undershirt over his head.

Amanda gazed dreamily at his bare chest. She had fantasized about it so many times and now it was in front of her and just waiting to be fondled. Laying back down beside her, JC carefully grabbed on to her wrist and placed her palm on his bare skin. Immediately she ran her fingers down the length of his bare torso. It felt every bit as good as she'd imagined.

Closing her eyes, she let out a soft moan and a smile slid to her lips as she remembered just exactly how many times she had dreamed of this very moment.

"What?" he asked, realizing the goofy grin on her face.

"Nothing." Amanda said with a flirty giggle.

"Tell me," he insisted with a smile.

Amanda turned onto her side, leaning on an elbow and facing him directly in front of her. Teasingly, JC drug one fingertip down the front of her neck and along the inside of her neckline.

"Don't be shy, Amanda," he remarked.

"I'm not being shy," she defended.

He rested his hand on her hip for a brief moment, staring at the place where he touched her, and then ran his palm down the length of her dress until reaching her bare leg. The smoothness of his hand against her bare skin sent her nerve endings into overload. Was there such thing as too much sensation? If so, she might explode from all of his wonderful caresses.

"Nothing you could say would change the way I feel. You don't need to be embarrassed or shy," he continued.

"I was just thinking of the first time I saw you without your shirt on," she finally revealed.

JC smiled pleasingly as he leaned in to kiss her lips. "You wanted me," he stated, pulling away briefly.

"Yeah, you could say that," Amanda confessed, right before his lips covered hers for another time.

"It's okay, I know," he teased, his hand slowly inching up her thigh and sneaking underneath the hem of her dress.

Even though her eyes rolled at his playful arrogance, it really was the farthest thing from her mind. Inside Amanda was on fire. So many feelings were flowing through her body that she wasn't sure which one to concentrate on the most. All she knew was laying there with him so close, touching and kissing her the way he was, was pure heavenly.
Just as she thought his hand would inch farther, the warmth of his touch left her thigh and instead rose to her waist. His lips softly brushed against hers as his fingers slid down her back, finding the bare skin her dress failed to cover. Her eyes flitted closed once again as he kissed her, and kissed her, and kissed her, all the while, his hand traipsing down her bare back.

Her breath heavy and her heart racing, she tangled a leg in between his much stronger ones. It didn't matter that her dress was practically pushed up to her backside.

JC LEANED IN and placed an affectionate kiss on her forehead. His fingertips brushed across her cheek weightlessly as he removed the stray strands of hair from her face. With care, he reached his hand to the back of her neck, fidgeting with the clasp that kept her dress on. Amanda was ready. She was ready to give herself completely. There was no need for him to wait any longer.

With the clasp undone, the two straps hung loose, but still covered her. Tracing his fingers across her collarbone he delicately pushed them aside, burying his face into her neck soon after.

Confirmation was made by the tiny sounds coming from her voice. He knew Amanda wanted this. There was no question about it. Lightly he cupped her breast with his hand, but the fact was, her dress was still in the way. Trailing his tongue against her ear, he asked softly, "how do I get this thing off?"

He was a little surprised when she rose to her knees and immediately slipped it over her head. "Like that," she answered.

JC stopped and stared at her for a moment. Amanda was beautiful. Her creamy skin was flawless, with not one blemish, or dimple in the wrong place. As she sat in front of him wearing nothing but a pair of lacy black panties, his erection must have grown ten times. Already it had been pressing against the seam of his pants, but now he felt like his zipper was going to bust open any minute if he didn't get them off quick.

He met her on his knees, wrapping his arms around her and kissing her with a deep desire. "You are so beautiful," he whispered, "you don't know how lucky I feel to be with you."

Her hands pressed into his back as his mouth swept over hers with a passionate force. Hungrily they pressed down the length of his back, passing his waist and grabbing on to the firmness that lay below. With an inviting sigh, she fell onto her back and JC quickly followed, covering her with his half-clothed body and ravishing her neckline with kisses.

AMANDA WAS SURPRISED at how comfortable she felt with him...being so naked. But as his tongue trailed down her chest and his hands roamed freely over her body, she knew that after this night a part of her would be changed forever.

She whispered his name, tangling her hand in his hair just as he trailed his tongue across her nipple. "JC," she repeated, this time her voice in much more of a moan than before.

But he was ignoring her, instead doing delightful things to her flesh with his mouth. She indulged in him, her body having a hard time remaining still as he lavished her with affection, his lips kissing down the center of her stomach.

After a short time, she called to him again.

Finally she received an answer, "what sweetheart?" he asked, just before his mouth passed over her hip bone, sending a chill across her entire body.

"Come here," she told him.

Of course he didn't. Instead he teasingly tugged on her underwear with his teeth. "Why?" he asked, his tongue trailing over the lacey material and landing on her leg.

"Because I - "

But he didn't let her finish, barely pulling his lips from her thigh. "Just trust me," he said, looking up at her as he spoke and then returning his lips to her skin, this time pressing his mouth to her inner thigh. Gently he pushed her legs farther apart. Amanda closed her eyes, relinquishing control, or her effort for control anyway, and instead reveled in his touch.

What she had really wanted to tell him was that she was ready, she didn't want to wait any longer. He had made her so incredibly turned-on, her body was just aching to feel him inside her.

With his hands rubbing on her legs and his lips dangerously close to where she wanted him the most, Amanda feared that if he did what she had a feeling he might do, she was more than likely going to lose it. And she was right, as he delicately slid her panties to the side and the warmth of his tongue touched against her most private place.

Uncontrollably she squirmed, his mouth kissing her in the most intimate way and sending waves of pleasure though out her body.

Unable to hold on for another second, she gripped on to the back of his head and pulled him away from her, silently begging for him to give her what she wanted. He looked at her with pleasure before kissing his way back up her body.

Amanda didn't want to wait any longer, as soon as he was within reach, she latched on to his belt and undid the buckle as fast as she could. "Ooh, I like this," he said nuzzling his face into her neck, "you're undressing me now."

But he soon took over, lifting his body and removing his bottom layers, exposing himself completely. The man was absolutely gorgeous from head to toe, every inch of him. For a minute, Amanda realized, she just stared in awe.

JC reached underneath her and pulled the covers of the bed down completely, slipping both of the their bodies inside the satin smoothness of the sheets.

Amanda took in a deep breath as he reached over her and pulled a condom out of the nightstand drawer, all the while his erection rubbing against her belly. She tried not to think about the fact that she'd never been in this position before. Or that maybe she was still just a little nervous, even though there was no doubt in her mind that this is what she wanted.

But he didn't rush to put it on, instead he carefully laid his body against hers and stroked the top of her head with his fingers. "Don't be nervous, okay?" he whispered with a kiss, a kiss filled with tenderness.

"I'm not."

"You are a little, I can tell."

"I want you," she said softly.

"And I'm making you wait, aren't I?" he said with a grin. He touched his lips to hers and then smiled, "I want you, too. More than you could possibly imagine."

"I doubt that," Amanda remarked.

He kissed her again, brushing his fingers down her cheek. She watched as he raised his body and slid what little clothing she had left, off of her body. Grabbing the condom wrapper off the bed, he ripped it open and Amanda laid there anxious and still a little nervous as he put it on.
His face returned closely to her own, and he once again traced his fingers across the side of her cheek. He smiled and gave her a soft kiss. "I'll go slow," he told her.

Amanda took in a deep breath and relaxed, feeling his tip rub against her readiness and waiting for what was coming next. She closed her eyes as he finally began to enter her slowly. Her eyes still closed, she felt a twinge of pain as he filled her, but it was nothing like she had expected. It was more of a discomfort than pain, but she imagined it would disappear very quickly.

Immediately she relaxed even more.

"Baby, open your eyes." He spoke with such caring that it made Amanda's heart ache. As she looked at him above her, his face so close as he barely moved inside of her, she realized that for the first time in her life she knew how it felt to truly be with a man, to become one, to share something so intimate that the only way to understand it was to have experienced it.

And it was with him.

And he made her feel wonderful.

She let out a soft moan, pushing her hips to meet him, ignoring that slight sting, and in turn he sank even deeper inside of her.

"Tell me if I'm hurting you or going too fast," he whispered into her ear.

Gradually his rhythm grew faster, the sting disappearing and being replaced with a sensation that made her want to moan and scream out loud. Pleasure ripped through her body as he thrust in side of her. It didn't take long before she was clutching on to his back, experiencing a tidal wave of ecstasy. But when it hit, it was nothing like she'd expected. It was nothing like what he had given her the night before. It was fifty times more incredible. He seemed to know she was slipping over the edge, as he kissed her hard and deep, her body trembling with each erotic move he made and her moans muted as his lips pressed against hers.

He followed quickly, she realized, by his loud moans and by the words he was whispering to her. All Amanda could think of, besides how good she felt, was that she had done this to him. Her. It was her body that was making him loose control. Her.

JC COLLAPSED ONTO her carefully, their bodies still joined together, and kissed her sweetly on the neck. All he could do was breath. Everything about that experience had felt so incredibly right and he was realizing that he had this really strange desire to tell her he loved her.

But how could he love someone so fast?

Out of the two of them, he didn't expect that he'd be the one confused after the whole experience, but suddenly he was.

(c) 2001 BrandyRae 

Chapter 15
The candles had all been put out and the room was dark. Beside him Amanda slept peacefully, her bare back only a touch away. Outside the storm had finally hit and tiny pellets of rain beat against the balcony patio. Every so often a gust of wind would blow splatters into the glass door leaving spots of water reflecting off the moonlight.

JC stared blankly. His mind turned on high, sleep seemed to be the farthest thing away.

He didn't understand why he felt so strange. He had wanted her so badly. He still did. Every time his eyesight drifted across her bare shoulders he contemplated waking her. But he didn't.

He had never expected to feel so strongly so soon. The fact that he had to bite his tongue to not tell her he loved her during their lovemaking, well - it scared him. He must have been imagining things. How could he love someone so fast?

But Amanda was incredible. Every second more he spent with her he realized it. He felt different with her. He felt like himself and he felt happy, completely and utterly happy.

And now she had given him the most sacred thing in the world, herself.
Tomorrow morning he'd have a lot of things to figure out, but tonight he was going to keep pretending that nothing in the world mattered except for her.

He glanced at her again and took in a deep breath. Unable to resist, he wrapped an arm over her side and cuddled up against her, nuzzling his face into the back of her neck. She moaned softly and pushed her back against him. He wasn't sure if she was awake or not, but either way, she fit perfectly against his body.

Brushing her hair away, he placed his lips softly against her neck. "You awake, sweetheart?" he asked quietly.

She only let out a soft hum in response.

Tenderly, he kissed her once more. "I don't want morning to come," he voiced his thoughts softly.

"Me either," she agreed, but he hadn't been expecting a response.

"So you are awake?"

"Mmmm, just barely. Is it raining outside?"

"Yep. Pretty hard, too." He told her, squeezing her even tighter.

"At least I have you here to keep me warm," she sighed.

Her words made his heart ache and he wasn't sure why. Maybe because she felt so good in his arms that he hated to think of the time when she wouldn't be there. A time which was approaching very soon.

"Yes, you do," he agreed.

With ease she rolled in his embrace, turning his direction and resting her face comfortably against his chest. One arm slid around his body with grace as she pressed her lips to his warm skin. "When can we do this again?" she asked.

He chuckled quietly at her question. "That depends on exactly what you mean by this."

Her lips touched to his skin for a second time, a scorching fire igniting in his body as her hand slid to the small of his back, resting just above the waistband of his boxer briefs. "You know--this." Her answer came through in a mumble as she pressed her mouth to his flesh once again, this time circling the tip of her tongue around his nipple. Immediately it hardened--he hardened.

"Do you have any idea what you're doing to me?" he asked as her mouth continued to dance across his chest, slowly inching its way downward.

But she didn't seem to be paying much attention to his words as she lightly ran her fingers over his abdomen. "You have the nicest stomach," she sighed.

"I'm glad you like it," he remarked, flopping on to his back and taking her with him.

Amanda let out a high-pitched "ooh" as she was hurdled onto his lap in an instant. "I guess you do like me," she remarked with wide eyes, staring at him in the darkness.

"You just figuring that out?" he asked her, his tone filled with playful sarcasm.

"I guess not," she answered, carefully easing herself against him.

"It won't break," JC assured her, noticing she was acting as if she was walking on eggshells. "I won't break, I promise."

Amanda grinned and, from what he could tell in the darkness, blushed. He grabbed her wrists and gently guided her to lay her chest against him.

"I know I'm not the biggest guy in the world, but I'm pretty strong, really," he told her as she rested against him, her breasts pressing into his chest and seeming to be one of the best feelings in the whole entire world.

"I didn't think that you weren't," she defended, her body rising and falling just a smidgen as she inhaled a deep breath.

JC rested his hands against her back, noting how much tinier she was than him. But still, she seemed to fit so perfectly against him. And for some odd reason, that weird sensation to tell her he loved her came sneaking up again as she laid there so contently on top of him.

Of course, his mind track took a quick turn as she gently grinded against him. Desire shot through him in record speed and if nothing else, he ached from head to toe just to feel her one more time.

He didn't even realize the sound that had escaped his voice thanks to her movement until she let out a tiny giggle. "Oh really?" she asked playfully.

JC groaned in response, his hands eagerly sweeping down beneath the sheets to grasp on to her firm behind.

She chuckled, each movement shooting fire through his veins. "What do you want?" she asked teasingly, her lips touching down to his shoulder.

"No sweetheart," he corrected her, "what do you want?"

The moisture of her lips touched just below his ear and another quiet moan slipped from his voice. "You," she finally whispered against his skin, her breath tickling every nerve ending it touched.

With that, he hugged his arms around her even tighter. Because if there was one thing he wanted to give her, it was definitely himself.

AMANDA'S EYES OPENED to a startling new reality the following morning, and it wasn't the fact that she was virtually nude, or that JC's nearly naked body was practically glued beside her. It had more to do with how comfortable she felt with it all.

Two weeks ago she couldn't have imagined herself in such a position, but now it seemed to make so much sense.

Her eyes focusing in on the sliding glass door that led off to the balcony, she realized that the sky was dark and the rain was probably apt to continue even though it had subsided for the moment. The stormy weather didn't bother Amanda too much. In fact, now it would probably forever remind her of JC and their wonderful night together. She only hoped there were more nights like the one before in their future.

Huh, she just hoped they had a future period. The thought of them not really sickened her.

Stretching, she took in a deep breath and contemplated getting up to use the restroom. Just as she moved to crawl out from under the blankets, his phone chirped from the nightstand and JC sat up in a hurry. Amanda laid there motionless as if she were still asleep, listening as he answered with a groggy "hello."

Immediately she sensed his uneasiness. Immediately she knew who it was just by the tone of his voice and the way he slumped out of the covers. She listened carefully, her heart breaking by the second. "Didn't I tell you yesterday not to call so early?" he said as he stepped out of bed.

Her heart sank deeper and deeper as she listened to his voice grow distant and then finally as the bathroom door shut and he disappeared. Now was her chance. She hopped out of bed and ran to her bedroom, shutting the door behind her.

How could things have gone from wonderful to horrible in just a matter of seconds? This was a terrible reality to wake up to. Her head spinning, she went straight to the bathroom and headed for the shower. Maybe the water would wash all of her uneasiness away.

JC TRIED TO WIPE away the foul mood he was suddenly in as he stepped out of the bathroom. Really all he wanted to do was crawl back in bed and cuddle up next to Amanda. Of course, when he realized she wasn't there anymore, that idea wash shot all to hell. Plus he had a good feeling that his morning would probably be taking another step downward before it got any better.

Amanda was upset. He knew this without even seeing her. She had fled to her bedroom and honestly he didn't blame her one bit. Damn Jessie for calling. He had told her he'd call her on his way home.

But even worse, damn himself for putting Amanda in such an awful position.
Taking in a deep sigh and realizing that the room was a little chilly, he stepped into a pair of pajama bottoms and headed out to the living room, hoping that maybe she'd be out there on the couch or that if she was in her room, the door would be open.

No such luck. As he figured, it was closed.

Softly he knocked on her door, "Amanda?" he called through the wooden entry.

No answer.

He knocked again, this time a little louder. When she failed to answer for a second time, he decided to try the handle. Surprisingly, it was unlocked. Slowly he pushed the door open. "Amanda?" he called to her again. As he cautiously made his way inside, he realized that she was in the shower. But even better, he realized that the bathroom door was open. Suddenly he had a gleam of hope. Maybe she wasn't upset after all.

"You in here, sweetheart?" he called to her, slowly venturing towards the steamy bathroom. Carefully he peeked inside to find her shadowy image through the glass shower doors. Arousal hit him like a ton of bricks as he eyed her wet, naked body only a few feet away. Staring openly, he wanted nothing more than to hop in and join her.

Until she turned around to notice him. "JC!" she yelled at the top of her lungs, "what are you doing in here! Get out!"

"Sorry. The door was open," he tried justifying his peeping.

Amanda turned off the water and grabbed her towel, wrapping it around her body in a hurry. He didn't quite understand why she felt so rushed to cover herself since he'd already seen everything there was to see. Obviously, she was a little upset about his wake up call.

"The door was not open," she countered, "I locked it."

"You're right, I just magically appeared in your bedroom." He realized after his sarcastic remark that his words probably weren't the best choice at the moment, considering she was already mad at him.

"I'm not kidding," she said, opening the shower door, dripping wet and stepping out onto the tiled floor. "Please, just let me get dressed."

"Amanda, I know you're upset and I'm sorry." 

HE WAS RIGHT, she was upset. But she was more upset at herself than anything. She had let herself get into this position. She had let herself become the other woman. That was the last thing she wanted to be. How could a night so romantically special feel so dirty the next morning?

Although, when he stared at her with those gorgeous blue eyes it was easy to remember just how wonderful their night had been. But now their weekend was over and maybe that wasn't the only thing that needed to be over. Maybe, Amanda couldn't help but think, it would be better if they ended it now rather than later.

"JC, I'm not mad at you. I'm mad at myself. I should have never let myself get into this position. You have a girlfriend and obviously things just aren't going to work out between us. I mean, it's been a great weekend, but that's it. You have your life to go back to now and I have mine."

She spotted the confusion in his eyes, but didn't take it to heart. She was sticking to her guns, this was the right decision. Finally she was thinking straight again.

"But what about last night? I mean, didn't you--"

"Didn't I what?" she asked after he cut himself short.

He dropped his gaze to the floor, notably taking in a deep breath. "I'll let you get dressed," he finally said and left the room.

Amanda just stood there, staring at the door he had just exited through. Suddenly she wanted nothing more than to collapse onto the bed and cry. Her heart ached so badly that she barely had enough motivation to move, but finally she did. She fought back the tears and put on her clothes, counting the seconds until she'd be home and able to let out all of the sorrow that had welled up inside. This was not how she'd wanted their weekend to end. Not at all.

JC SLOWLY RETURNED his belongings to his suitcase after his shower. He had left his door open, hoping Amanda would decide to come and talk to him, but since he had left her bedroom he hadn't heard one word from her. It had been almost an hour and he knew she'd be leaving for the airport soon. It was killing him inside that she was pushing him away, but he didn't blame her. He didn't blame her one bit.

He had never expected to fall for her so hard. He'd never expected to care so deeply about a women he had barely met. He'd never meant to hurt her, even though deep down he knew he would. He knew that somehow it would come to this. He'd only hoped it wouldn't come so soon.

A spark of hope shot through him as he heard the creak of her bedroom door. He continued packing, hoping that she'd appear in his doorway, but when he heard her shuffling around in the living room he realized she was only gathering up her belongings, the same as he.

Unable to keep himself away, he walked to the doorway and leaned against the frame, watching her quietly. She was obviously upset. Her mannerisms were edgy and her body was tense. She picked up her scandals that had been sitting beside the couch, catching his stare as she stood up straight, her shoes dangling in her hand.

"So this is it?" JC asked her, his hands resting in his jean pockets.

"I guess so," she answered, unable to look him in the eye.

"I care about you, Amanda. I never meant to hurt you."

"I care about you, too, JC. But obviously things just aren't going to work out. It's better that we just end it now and avoid- " Amanda stopped her words and slowly let her gaze meet his. He watched as she took in a deep breath and then looked away. She was having a hard time keeping it together and he hated to see her that way, but she had put up a wall between them and he wasn't quite sure how to break through.

"Avoid what?" he asked softly.

She looked at him again briefly. "-any more hurt," she finally finished, her voice cracking, as she turned and fled back to her bedroom, shutting the door swiftly behind her.

JC sighed and shook his head. This was not the goodbye he'd imagined.

TWO HOURS LATER Amanda was on her flight home. It had been a very painful goodbye, but she was thankful she had managed to say goodbye period. It would have been a lot easier to just storm out of the hotel at eight o'clock in the morning when his significant other had called in the first place, but she hung in there and left with a little dignity, she hoped.

She just didn't understand why if he cared about her so much then why didn't he put up a fight? He didn't even try to make things right. He didn't even try to leave on good terms.

Not that she was making much of an effort, but she wasn't the one cheating on her girlfriend! Or boyfriend, whatever. The point was, he was in the wrong, not her. Granted, she knew about that the entire time, but still, he made it seem like he really cared about her the whole weekend. How could he just let it all go if he cared so much?

Obviously he didn't. He just put on a really good show. God, how did she let herself fall for his good looks and charm?

Because there was more to it and whether he wanted to admit it or not, he did care. She could feel it all the way to the depths of her soul just how much he cared. She just didn't understand why he was afraid to let her see it. Why didn't he put up a fight? Already she hated the male species. This was her first experience and already she just knew that they were all awful!

Oh well, at least she wasn't a virgin anymore!

AMANDA SENSED RIGHT away when she got back to her hotel that something was going on. As soon as she pulled into the parking garage she could feel that something just wasn't right. Her hunch was confirmed as she walked into her office to find her father sitting at her desk with the phone up to his ear. An immediate look of shock slapped itself across her face.

He ended his call quickly once he noticed her walk through the door.

"Dad? What are you doing here?" she asked with surprise.

"Amanda, sit down," he told her sternly, but the tone in his voice was different. For once in his life it seemed less confident than usual.

"What's going on?" she asked curiously as she plopped into the leather chair across from her desk.

"I need you to go to New York and I don't want you to ask any questions. Just go," he told her.

What was he talking about New York? This was not what she wanted. She wanted to come home and drown in her sorrows. Now on top of all her other problems, she had to go to New York? And he wasn't even going to tell her why? This was ridiculous.

"For how long?" she asked.

"I'm not sure. There's some things going on in the business and until it all settles down I want you to go to New York. You can stay at the apartment there."

"You don't want me to work?"

"No, I want you to take a vacation."

"You're serious?"

"Amanda, this is very serious. I wouldn't ask otherwise. Trust me, this is for your own good. Please, just do as I ask. Pack up your things, you're leaving tonight."

"Tonight?" she asked with panic.

"Yes, tonight. Now go on, I've got more calls to make."

Amanda stomped out of her office and headed down towards the elevator that would take her to her apartment. Her head was twirling with confusion. In a matter of just a few hours her whole entire world had crumbled. Why did he need for her to go to New York? This was just plain crazy. She'd never heard of such a thing.

"Amanda!" she heard her name being called and new instantly who it was.

She turned around, but Marcy didn't even give her a chance to speak. "What's going on? Why is your father here? Rumors are flying all over the place."

For a split second Amanda let down her guard and gave her shoulders a shrug, letting all the emotional exhaustion seep to her face, but then she quickly shoved it away, hoping to God that Marcy hadn't noticed. "I don't know. All I know is that I have to go to New York and I don't know why or for how long."

"New York?" Marcy asked with surprise. "When?"

"Tonight."

(c) 2001 BrandyRae

The rest of the afternoon was so busy that Amanda didn't even get a chance to feel sorry for herself. She was too busy packing her things for New York and trying to figure out what the heck was going on with her father. He said the business was in some sort of trouble and that made her nervous. Maybe it was time to start thinking of finishing her education. If there was one thing spending time with JC had taught her, was that Amanda needed to start thinking of Amanda and that maybe the hotel life wasn't exactly what she wanted after all.

Her flight left fairly late, almost ten p.m. Her father had one of the hotel drivers drop her at the airport, but he had first told her goodbye and assured her that everything would be alright. Deep inside Amanda had the sneaking suspicion that it wasn't going to be alright. She had a feeling that her life was about to take quite a turn and she was a little nervous about that.

Ultimately, she would've loved to have been able to call JC and ask for his support. Not financially of course, but emotionally. Right now she really needed a shoulder to lean on and it was pretty safe to say she had no one. Twenty four hours before and she would have had him.

She shouldn't have blown up at him. She shouldn't have gotten so upset. But she had and it was too late now. There was no way to turn back time and, as they say, there was no use crying over spilt milk.

She slumped in her first class seat, her book buried in front of her face but she only stared blankly at the pages. Her mind was a million miles away, and rightfully so. It was times like these when she really yearned for her mothers advice. She'd kill to have her mom tell her everything would be okay and that it would all work out in the end. She'd do anything to hear those kind words from that loving voice.

But no matter how much she wished, that was just impossible. She'd have to make do on her own.

The taxi ride to her fathers Manhattan apartment was a little scary. It was, after all, nearly five a.m. when she got in and still very dark outside. Unlocking the front door to a cold empty space was even worse. Her father hadn't stayed in the apartment for months and Amanda hadn't been there in years. Sure, it had been kept up while he was gone. There wasn't a speck of dust to be scene. But it was lacking that certain hominess, that welcoming smile, or even a familiar picture on the wall. Besides the furniture, which was scarce, the place was empty. She wondered if there were even pots and pans in the kitchen for her to cook with. Surely there weren't any groceries. She'd obviously have to go shopping as soon as the stores were open. Luckily, with everything going on, she didn't really have much of an appetite.

With the time change, her inner clock was all screwed up. So instead of unpacking, she went straight for the bedroom and tried to get some sleep. Of course, as soon as she laid down she only tossed and turned. The memories of JC's strong arms curled around her the night before haunting her every thought.

The next few days were going to be rough, but Amanda was strong. If she survived through her mother's death, she could survive through anything. That much she was sure of.

When Amanda woke up later that morning, her depression had hit full force. She was in a strange place, alone, and the one person who she wanted to talk to was completely out of reach. Well, not that she couldn't call him if she really wanted to, but she wasn't about to go there. She was sure that after their little talk he went home and made up with her and decided to put Amanda out of his life forever.

If that wasn't the case, then why hadn't he put up more of a fight?

Amanda just laid there, staring up at the ceiling and realizing that she had absolutely no reason to get out of bed whatsoever.

When her cell phone rang she almost didn't have enough motivation to answer it, but that one tiny spark of hope in the back of her head moved her arm to grab it off the nightstand. Maybe it would be him.

Of course, it wasn't. It was Marcy.

"Amanda, are you okay?" her friend asked after a quick hello.

"I'm fine, why?" Amanda replied, but her tone was far from being okay.

"You don't sound okay," Marcy said, "you sound awful."

"I just woke up, that's all," Amanda explained.

"Isn't it like noon there?"

"I didn't sleep all night. I was on an airplane, remember?" Amanda answered irritatedly. "So what's going on there today? Did you find anything out?"

Marcy explained the strange atmosphere at the hotel. All the while, Amanda prayed that she wouldn't ask about her weekend with JC. So far there had been too many other things going on for Marcy to even bother, but Amanda knew that the woman was bound to bring it up sometime. She dreaded that moment. The last thing she wanted to do was talk about it.

Marcy was just getting to the part explaining the strange "suits" that had been wandering around the hotel when there doorbell rang.

"Someone's at the door, Marce. I'll call you later."

"Okay sweetie, don't stress out too much. This'll all blow over soon, don't worry," her friend told her.

"I hope so, thanks." Amanda replied, pulling a robe around her shoulders as she hobbled out to the living room and headed for the front entry way.

"Talk to you later."

"Bye." Amanda turned off her cell and slipped it into her robe pocket.

As she peaked through the tiny peep hole in the front door she was instantly excited. Amanda threw open the front door and nearly attacked her cousin, Terra, immediately. The two hadn't seen each other in nearly two years and they had always been very close. Terra was only a few months younger than Amanda and as children they were inseparable. But Terra had been in New York ever since she'd graduated from high school. She went there for college and had never came back. Now she worked at a big-time law firm, living out her dream as an attorney.

"Oh God Terra, I am so glad you're here," Amanda sighed into her cousins shoulder as they embraced in the doorway.

"Manda, you're a mess. Is everything okay? What's going on anyway? My dad didn't tell me why you were here, he just said that you needed some company," Terra explained, leaning out of Amanda's bear hug to get a good look at her cousin.

"I'm okay, come in." Amanda ushered her cousin through the living room and sat her down on the cool leather couch. "I'd offer you something to drink, but I don't think there's anything here." Amanda told her.

"What do you mean you don't think? Did you look?"

"No, I just figured - nobody's been here for months."

Immediately Terra stood up and headed for the kitchen. "Yes, but I'm sure your dad had someone go out and go shopping if he knew you were coming," she replied as she disappeared into the other room. "Uh, I knew it. The fridge is full."

A few minutes later, Terra stepped back into the living room with a cheery smile, her golden blond locks bouncing against her shoulders as she strutted towards the sofa. Terra had inherited the William's family good nature and positive outlook on life. Something that seemed to have skipped over Amanda. Terra was always happy and she always looked at the bright side of things. Definitely an optimist, just like Amanda's mom had been, Terra's aunt. "I started some coffee. You look like you need it." Terra said.

"Shouldn't you be working today?" Amanda asked as her cousin took seat on the sofa beside her.

"I should, but I took the day off."

Amanda let her face fall into her hands and vigorously rubbed her sleepy eyes. "I am so glad you're here," she said through a yawn, "the last two days have been pure hell for me."

"And I hope you're going to tell me all about it," Terra remarked.

"I don't even know where to start," Amanda sighed.

"Try the beginning. I'm not in a hurry."

And that she did. She started at the very beginning from the first time she laid eyes on Mr. JC Chasez and every episode that happened after. Of course, she didn't get into too much detail on the intimate parts, but what little she did reveal was awfully hard to discuss. Talking about it made the hurt surface all over again. But at least with Terra, she didn't have to hold any emotion back. This was her family and one of the few that she was close to. It wasn't too surprising that by the end of the story Amanda was practically in tears.

"You poor baby, you went through all this turmoil and then get back to the hotel to find out that you have to leave right away? No wonder you look so awful."

"Thanks Terr," Amanda sighed.

"So are you going to call him?" she asked curiously.

"I don't think so," Amanda answered.

"Yeah, you're right. I mean, it's probably best that you don't call him anyway. I'm sure he's already forgotten about you. After pursuing you the way he did and inviting you to Los Angeles for the weekend after knowing you for only a few days. He must have just wanted a piece of ass, because - you know, he couldn't get that anywhere else. He's such a desperate guy and all." Terra spouted, her words weighted with sarcasm as she rested her hands defiantly against her hips.

Amanda rolled her pale eyes at her cousin's words and shrugged it off. "It doesn't matter. What's done is done and I'm sure things would've never worked out anyway."

"Of course they wouldn't have. I mean you're just destined to live the rest of your life alone, right?" Terra continued, "I mean, God forbid you live happily ever after."

"Happily ever after doesn't exist."

"Oh yes it does. Don't give me that crap," Terra argued, "just look at grandma and grandpa."

"Yeah, but that's different," Amanda defended.

"Why is that different?"

"Because, it just is. I don't know." Amanda was getting a little frustrated with the whole conversation. Her cousin was very persistent and very good at proving her point. That's why she was an attorney for goodness sakes!

"Alright, fine. You win for now. Get up and get dressed. Take a shower. Do whatever it is you need to do because we're getting out of here. You need to get some fresh air." Terra decided.

"But it's freezing out there," Amanda whined.

"Are you afraid of a little cold weather all the sudden? Come on, get up!"

As Amanda stood in the shower, letting the warm water run down her body and trying her best to pull it together, she realized that Terra was a God sent. If it hadn't have been for her showing up at the door, Amanda probably would have laid in bed all day long. Her cousin was right, she needed to get up and get moving. She couldn't let all this bad fortune ruin her life. Everything would work out in the end. It always did.

Two days after JC had left Amanda, for the first time in three years he was technically a free man. Free from Jessie, anyway. What a relief he felt. He couldn't even begin to explain what a weight was lifted off his shoulders. She had taken it surprisingly better than he had thought. Actually, it was pretty obvious that she had been feeling the same burnt out feelings as he was.

For the next week and a half his schedule was jam packed. It figured. He had so many things in his personal life to take care of, he didn't want to be busy with work. But his career was his life and that would never change. Hopefully Amanda would understand.

Hopefully she would finally forgive him enough to return his calls. He had left four messages since she'd left him at the hotel and so far, nothing.

But he wasn't about to give up, he just had to give her a little time.

His train of thought was disturbed as Chris sat down beside him in the private jet they were riding in. JC looked up at his long-time friend with a smile. Even with things the way they were with Amanda, for some reason he just knew that everything was going to be okay. He wasn't going to let their little set back get him down.

"Look at Lance, sound asleep," Chris whispered, leaning in towards JC's shoulder. "He's just asking for trouble."

"Or maybe you're just looking for it," JC remarked.

"Me? Never." Chris turned his head to glance over at Joey and then continued. "If Joey doesn't quit eating, we're going to have to send him to fat camp," he said, nodding his head at Joey who was munching on a bag of potato chips.

With that JC had to hold in a laugh, Chris's tone of voice alone was enough to get a laugh out of him. "What about you?" he asked in return.

"Huh? What about me?" he remarked in return, running a hand down his waist and straightening his posture. "Is there something wrong with my girlish figure?" Chris asked in a high-pitched, mocking tone of voice.

"No, nothing that I can see...tubby."

"Tubby?"

"Did you just come over here to bug me or what?" JC finally asked.

"Of course. Everyone else is busy or asleep. Why aren't you asleep?" Chris asked curiously, reaching for a square pillow that was sitting beside him and resting it on his lap, fidgeting with the button that was in the center of it.

"Did you drink coffee before we left?" JC asked.

"Oh no, then we'd be in big trouble. Did you drink coffee?" Chris asked in response, and then quickly answered the question for himself. "Oh wait, never mind. We can all tell when you've had coffee. So far you're not bouncing off the walls so we must be safe."

JC glared at Chris beside him, absent of any response. Instead he watched as Chris lifted the pillow, aimed it carefully, and threw it across the aisle at Lance, hitting him right smack in the head.

Lance didn't sit up in surprise, or even give Chris half of the reaction he would have liked. Instead he shifted in his seat, groaned and pushed the pillow from his shoulder where it had landed after bouncing off the side of the head.

Quietly Chris stood up, tip-toed to the pillow and bent down to pick it up.

"If you even do that again I swear you are gonna get it Chris." Lance spoke threateningly, his eyes remaining shut.

"Did I mess up your precious beauty sleep?" Chris asked, feigning concern.

"Go away," Lance said sternly.

JC found it the perfect opportunity to sneak away. He grabbed the phone and locked himself in the bathroom, the only place where there was any privacy. Once inside he dialed the number to the hotel for the fifth time, hoping that this time Amanda would take his call.

After a greeting from the operator, he asked for her just as he had on the four prior calls. "Amanda Ballard, please."

"Let me transfer you to her voice mail," the mechanical sounding woman told him for the fifth time.

"Wait!" JC shouted into the phone.

"Yes sir?"

"Can you transfer me to her apartment?"

"I'm sorry, sir, but I can't do that."

"Why not?"

"Because I have been instructed to transfer all calls to her voice mail."

"Look, please. I'm begging you."

"I'm sorry, I can't help you. Please hold."

JC sighed as he was transferred once again to her voice mail to leave another desperate sounding message for her to call him back. "God," he sighed to himself, "I wonder if I should even bother."

But just as the recording should have came on, someone answered, "Yes?"

"Amanda?" JC asked with a bit more desperation in his voice than he would have liked.

"Amanda's not in the office today. Is there something I can help you with?"

"I thought I was being transferred to her voice mail."

"Oh, I'm sorry. I can transfer you if you'd like." The woman replied. But suddenly JC realized, maybe this was his chance. This woman didn't sound near as automated as the operator. Maybe she would help him.

"No, wait. Do you have any idea when she'll be back?"

The woman let out a long sigh before answering. "Unfortunately, no. She had to leave town for a little while. If there's something I can help you with I'd be more than happy to."

"No, that's okay. Thank you." JC hung up the phone completely and utterly confused. She'd left town? Where could she have gone? But the sudden news also gave him a bit of hope, maybe she hadn't been able to return his calls because she'd never gotten them.

He stepped out of the bathroom just in time to catch Lance and Chris wresting in the aisle of the airplane. Obviously, Chris hadn't given up without a fight. When the man wanted some action, he got it.

JC spent the rest of the plane ride completely baffled. After saving Chris and Lance from each other, he retreated with his head phones and tried to make sense of it all. Why would she have left town? Did he hurt her so badly that she couldn't even bare to work?

No, that couldn't have been it. Amanda was much stronger than that. Surely she couldn't have thought he was going to let it all end because they had hit a little rough patch. Yes, he had been in the wrong, but he was fixing it. No, he had fixed it. She had to realize how much he cared about her. Maybe his words didn't quite come out right the day she left, but it wasn't because he didn't care. She had to know that he cared.

It was just after three a.m. when *NSYNC finally landed in New York. They were scheduled for eight o'clock in the morning and JC wasn't even looking forward to it. They were gearing up for a big benefit show that they'd be doing the following week and it would be non stop rehearsals until then. As much as he loved his job, he would kill for just two days so he could sort things out with Amanda. So he could at least find her, but unfortunately that just wasn't possible.

©2001 BrandyRae

FBI? What the heck was the FBI doing at the hotel? "Are you sure it's the FBI, Ron?" Amanda asked him on her cell as she wandered in a daze through the department store, Terra walking a good three feet in front of her.

"Positive. They're flashing their badges all over the place and they've brought all of the staff in for questioning," Ron explained.

Now Amanda was thoroughly confused. In the fours days that she had been gone her father had not called her once. It really frustrated her that she had to get all of her information from the staff instead of him. Even though she knew she could always count on Ron, but it just didn't make any sense that her father was keeping her out of the loop. Or did it?

"This doesn't make any sense," Amanda remarked with frustration.

"I'm not sure exactly why..." Ron's words faded as Amanda suddenly caught whiff of a hauntingly familiar scent. She stopped dead in her tracks and took in a deep breath. She had been trying so hard not to think of JC, and with all that was going on at the hotel it hadn't been as difficult as she'd thought, but that aroma brought a fist full of memories to her head.

Slowly she turned just in time to catch a suited man walk by, the scent of his cologne unmistakably the same as JC's. She couldn't help but think that cologne should be deemed illegal--but damn it smelled wonderful.

"Amanda? You there?" Ron called to her through the phone.

"Yeah, I'm here," she sighed, "sorry. I got sidetracked for a second."

"Anyway, no one's seen your father since right after you left. It's like he just disappeared. We're all beginning to wonder if he's what they're looking for."

"But why? He hasn't done anything."

"That you know of Amanda. You hardly talk to the man. How could you know if he was involved in something that might draw the attention of the FBI?"

Amanda wasn't quite sure how to answer that as she took two steps out of the clothing rack she had nearly wandered into. Suddenly she was beginning to wonder if Ron was right. What if the FBI was looking for her Dad?

"Like what?" she asked, almost bumping into a woman walking behind her. She smiled apologetically at the mother of two and turned quickly to catch up with Terra.

"I don't know, Amanda. But I sure as hell want to find out. If he loses the hotel, all of our jobs could be in jeopardy. I've been at this place my whole damned life, I don't want to look for something else now. I'm too old to start a new job."

Amanda could sense Ron's uneasiness. "Don't worry, Ron. I'll make sure you're taken care of."

"Amanda, you don't even know if you're gonna be taken care of."

Ron's words rung like a bell in her ears. After finishing up her unsettling conversation with the hotel's head security man, Amanda met up with Terra at the make-up counter. Her mind was a hundred miles away as her cousin purchased the few items she had came to pick up. She just didn't understand how her father could put so many people in such a vulnerable position? What if he really was in trouble? She shunned the thought, praying to God it wasn't true.

The two of them finally made way out of the department store and headed onto the street, where they were in search of the next shop. Although, shopping was about the last thing Amanda felt like doing. For some reason, Terra had it set in her mind that it was just what Amanda needed.

What she really needed was for her life to be back to normal. She'd love to just rewind the clock back about two weeks, before Mr. Chasez had ever stepped into her uneventful life and before all of this mystery had began with her father and the hotel.

Unfortunately, that was impossible.

As they strolled past the music store, Amanda nearly died as she noticed the gigantic-sized picture of *NSYNC, JC standing front and center and looking straight at her. Even in print those eyes seemed to penetrate straight to her soul. Her heart broke in two just from the sight of him. Her entire ordeal would be so much better if she just had his support. Why did she have to get so upset at him just because of that stupid phone call?

She'd known about his girlfriend all along. She'd known it before she made the decision to sleep with him. How was it fair to get so upset afterward? She didn't blame him for not putting up a fight. She didn't deserve one.

"Manda, come on. Don't even look at it." Her cousin ushered her past the store, gripping onto her arm and pulling her down the street.

"ONE LITTLE, TWO little, three little *NSYNC billboards," Chris made up his own words to Three Little Indians as half of the group rode back to the hotel after rehearsal. JC tried his best to ignore the man, but unfortunately he was sitting right next to him. "Look!" Chris exclaimed. "That's number four! You'd think we're famous or something!"

"Chris, shut up," JC huffed, smacking his friend in the shoulder while glancing out the window at billboard number four. "Jesus! It's her!" JC couldn't believe his eyes. Was that Amanda on the street? He pressed both of his palms to the cold window and stared hard out the window, in shock that of all places she was actually in New York and walking down the street. "It's Amanda!"

His friends just burst into laughter. "You are so losing it man, its not even funny," Justin smirked.

Chris on the other hand, was so amused he could barely speak. "You're kidding, right? There's only like a million people on the street. But no! Wait! There she is!" he shouted. "Oops, wrong girl," he added with a tease.

"I swear to God it's her." JC was insistent. "Can we pull over please?" He asked the driver.

"No. We're not pulling over," Mike answered sternly from the front seat. "Get over it, man. It's not her."

JC stared out the window, she had vanished into the crowd of people. If it was her, she was gone now. He took in a heavy breath and slouched into his seat, a deep sadness filling his heart and soul. The last four days had been the most discouraging days he had ever experienced. He just didn't understand where she had disappeared to and why she wouldn't return his calls.

"Cheer up, buddy," Chris said quietly, patting JC comfortingly on the shoulder.

"I'm sure she'll call. She'd be stupid not to."

"Thanks," JC grinned appreciatively in response. His friends might have enjoyed teasing him, but it was nice to know that when it came right down to it, they were all standing strong beside him.

That night at the hotel, JC lounged in his room thinking of nothing but thoughts of Amanda. He had replayed their intimate weekend together so many times in his head that it was almost worn out. He was dying to make new memories with her, but he was beginning to feel like that would never happen.

Sometimes, if he closed his eyes tight enough, he could still feel her laying in his arms. His arms had never ached to hold somebody so badly, not until now.

Never would he have predicted feeling so strongly. Never would he have imagined that she could have gotten underneath his skin so deep. But she had and hardly a minute went by when he didn't feel like kicking himself in the ass for treating her the way he did.

He shouldn't have been so cold. He shouldn't have held back. He shouldn't have bitten his tongue when he wanted to proclaim his love for her. He should have told her how he really felt. He should have professed his feelings for her when the time was right, now he didn't have any time at all.

And he was kicking himself in the ass again and again and again, with every single thought and regret.

Then it hit him. If she really was staying in New York, well, then she'd have to be staying at a hotel. He'd call every single one until he found her. With a sudden spark of hope, he pulled the phone book out of the drawer and started thumbing through the pages.

Unfortunately it would only take him the rest of the night to call them all, but it would be worth it if he found Amanda.

He picked up the receiver to dial, but first went to grab the remote control to switch off the TV. His thumb was half way pressing down the power button when Amanda's picture appeared on the news program he had been watching. Quickly he dropped the phone and turned up the volume.

With wide eyes he watched, listening as the newscaster announced that the daughter of business mogul Jonathan Ballard had been missing for four days.

Missing?

"What do you mean she's missing?" he shouted at the television. "Missing like kidnapped?"

Immediately JC stood and began pacing across the floor once the segment was over. "She's missing?" he repeated to himself. "How can she be missing? This doesn't make any sense. She's here. In New York. I saw her today!"

Too worked up to sit down, but too frustrated to do anything, he kept pacing. Finally, after taking in deep breaths, he calmed down and decided that he was calling her hotel one more time and this time he was going to get some answers.
He glanced at the clock noticing it was nearly eight p.m., which meant it wasn't even five on the west coast. He picked up his cell and speed dialed the hotel, but this time instead of asking for Amanda, he asked for the retail store where her friend Marcy worked. Maybe she would give him some answers.

When he finally got an answer at the store, he had to really concentrate to stay calm. "Yes, may I speak with Marcy please?" he asked politely.

"This is her," she said with a bit of confusion.

"Marcy. It's JC Chasez. Don't hang up on me, please."

"Mr. Chasez? Why would I hang up on you?" she remarked professionally.

"Just call me JC, please," he told her, still trying really hard to stay calm. "I need to talk to you about Amanda."

"Are you there with her?" she asked curiously. "I have something I need to tell her."

Now he was really confused. "No, I'm not with her," he answered with a little irritation. "I haven't talked to her since last weekend."

"Oh. I figured you had."

"Look, what's this about her being missing? I just saw it on the news. Do you know where she is?"

"Missing? She's not missing. She's in New York, at her fathers apartment. What do you mean you saw it on the news?" she paused briefly and then came back on the line, "look, I have to go" and with that he got the dial tone in his ear.

JC hung up the receiver, his mind spinning with confusion. Why did the news report that she was missing? Why was Marcy so strange on the phone and how come she thought Amanda was with him? Something really weird was going on and he was bound to figure it out. Now he was beginning to wonder if Amanda really was in trouble.

AFTER A FULL DAY of shopping Amanda was pooped. She had just finished eating her dinner when there was an unexpected knock on the door. "Oh jeez," she said to herself, "it never fails. As soon as you go to sit down somebody knocks at the door."

Checking the peep hole first, she found two suited men standing in the hallway. Immediately she knew. Her stomach pushed up her throat as she unlocked the door with nervousness. She wasn't sure why she was nervous, but suddenly she was.

"Can I help you?" She asked, her voice a little shaky.

"Amanda Ballard? I'm Agent Barnes and this is Agent Miller. We're with the FBI and we'd like to ask you a few questions." The dark haired man on the left announced as both men showed her their badges.

"Yes, of course," Amanda cooperated, opening the door completely and letting them inside.

The two men followed her to the living room, where they all took a seat and

Amanda tried her best not to panic.

"This is about my father, isn't it?" she asked nervously, unable to hold back.

"Have you seen your father?" Agent Miller asked, sitting on the sofa across from her next to Agent Barnes. Agent Miller was a middle aged man with reddish colored hair and a clean shave. Although he didn't look at her threateningly, there was something about the crispness of his eyes that made Amanda weary.

"Not since he told me to leave."

"Your father asked you to come here?" Agent Barnes asked, leaning forward a bit and resting his elbows on top of his knees.

"Yes, on Sunday when I got home he told me I had to go to New York. That there were some problems with the business and that I had to leave right away and to not ask any questions."

Amanda watched as Agent Miller opened up a manila envelope and pulled out a few black and white photos. "I want you to look at these pictures and tell me if you recognize any of these men," he told her.

Amanda took the pictures and took a good look at the first one, her heart thumping inside of her chest. She shook her head slowly as she thumbed to the next one, not recognizing the man from the first.

"This man," she said, pointing to the scruffy looking gentleman in the picture, "he's stayed at the hotel. I don't know his name, but I know I've seen him there before."

"What about the next one? Have you seen him?" Agent Barnes asked.

Amanda flipped to the next picture and looked at it inquiringly. "No, I don't think so."

"But the second one? You're for sure?" Agent Miller asked questionably.

"Yes," she answered, returning the three photos to him. "Who are these men? And what does my father have to do with all this?"

"Ms. Ballard, we believe that these three men and your father are in some sort of business together--illegal business. Until we know more, we can't get into too much detail with you. Besides, it's for your own safety that you don't know too much." Agent Barnes explained.

"Illegal business? I don't understand. I mean, what-- how could he? Wait, you don't think I'm a part of this, do you?" She asked curiously, suddenly realizing that she worked for her father. For all she knew, she could be under investigation as well.

"If that were the case we'd be arresting you right now."

"How come you haven't arrested my father?"

"As soon as we find him we will," Agent Miller explained as he rose to his feet, Agent Barnes following his partner's lead.

"But I don't understand," Amanda gasped, standing up as well.

"We'll be in contact with you," Agent Barnes told her as the two men walked towards the door. "The best thing you can do is just stay here and keep a low profile." He handed her his business card and reached for the door handle. "Call us right away if you hear from your father."

"It's very important that you do, Ms. Ballard. If we find out that he does contact you and you don't tell us, you could be arrested as well." Agent Miller added.
Amanda just stood there in shock as the two men walked out the front door.

Tears brimmed her eyes as she shut and locked the door tight. Her whole world was crumbling right out from under her and there was nothing she could do about it.

(c) 2001 BrandyRae 

Slumped against the door just inside the entry hall, Amanda finally let it all out. Tears streamed down her cheeks as she hugged her arms around her knees, her body unable to move off the floor, frozen with fear and sadness. For the first time in her life she was left completely unknowing of the future, and that scared her more than anything. Even when her mother had passed on she'd had some security knowing that she had a life at the hotel and people there who cared about her. But now, everything was being taken away from her and there was nothing she could do about it.

As she assertively wiped away her tears, the anger started to set in. Anger at her father for putting her in such an awful position. Anger at him for jeopardizing all of the people that have been so loyal to him for so long. Herself included.

And anger at herself for ruining the one thing that would have truly helped her to cope with such difficult times. The relationship she had with JC.

"God, why?" she sniffled to herself, lifting her head up and focusing in on the hallway in front of her. "How come I get all of this at once?"

Slowly she rose to her feet, wiping away more tears and heading off to the bathroom to blow her nose. Just as she threw away her tissue in the garbage, she heard her cell phone chirping in the bedroom. She tried her best to get herself together before answering.

"Hello?"

"Amanda, I think I really screwed up."

Instantly Amanda recognized Marcy's voice. "What do you mean you screwed up?" She asked, a little confused by her friends words and a little nervous by the tone of her voice. Could things actually get any worse?

"The FBI agents heard me on the phone. They know where you are."

"They weren't supposed to know?" Amanda asked curiously.

"No," Marcy answered, her voice cracking as she spoke. If Amanda wasn't mistaken, Marcy was on the verge of tears herself. "Right after you left your father told me not to tell anyone where you went. I was the only one that knew. Well, myself and Ron, I guess," she explained, "but when JC called I just assumed you--"

"Wait? Did you say that JC called?" Amanda asked, her heart skipping a beat just from the sound of those words.

"Yes, and I thought he was there with you for some reason. I guess I just assumed, but he said something about you missing--"

"Yeah, missing to him because he doesn't know where I am," Amanda interjected.

"No, he said he saw it on the news. That you were missing."

"What?" Amanda asked with shock. "Why would - where would anyone - this just doesn't make any sense. Why would the news report that I was missing? I'm not missing."

"Amanda, listen to me. The FBI knows where you are now. They're probably going to be knocking on your door any second." It was obvious that Marcy was about to lose it. Her friends anxiety just caused Amanda to feel more anger at her father. It wasn't just Amanda he had affected, it was every single person she knew and every single person she worked with - that he worked with. Jonathon Ballard would be lucky if the FBI got a hold of him first because if Amanda got a hold of him he'd be in big trouble for doing this to her. She was fed up with all he had put her through. Look where it had gotten her...in a heck of a lot of trouble. "If they arrest you it'll be all my fault," Marcy finally spilled, her voice trembling and tears undoubtedly falling from her eyes.

"Marcy, calm down. I'm not going to get arrested. They've already been here. They talked to me already. It's okay."

She listened as her friend took in several deep breaths, "you're sure?" she asked after a moment.

"Yes, I'm positive. They know that I'm not involved in whatever it is that my father has gotten himself into."

"God Amanda, I feel horrible. Why did he send you there anyway? You should come home now. If they know where you are, why do you need to be in New York?"

Marcy had a good point. But Amanda thought it would be best if she checked with the FBI before she made any sudden movements. The last thing she wanted to do was make them suspicious. "I don't know if I should do that without talking to them first," Amanda explained. "Marcy, just relax. Everything will work out okay, I promise."

"Amanda, I'm not worried about myself. I'm worried about you."

"Don't Marcy. I can take care of myself. I'll be fine."

"Amanda, what happened with JC? Are you going to talk to me about it? You really shouldn't keep all of your feelings bottled up inside."

Not surprisingly, the question finally arose. But Amanda refused to speak and silence filled the phone line. Finally she took in a deep breath, but just as she spit out half of Marcy's name, the doorbell rang. "That's weird." Amanda remarked.

"What?"

"Someone's at the door. I hope it's not the FBI again. I really can't handle talking to them anymore tonight."

"Sure someone's at the door, you're just saying that so you don't have to tell me what's going on with you and JC." Marcy replied, a little bit of that usual spunk returning to her voice.

"I swear someone's really at the door." Amanda defended as she walked down the hall way and the doorbell rang once more. "See? Did you hear that?"

"Just open it all ready," Marcy commented. "I'll stay on the line in case it's some thug there to kill you or something. Then I'll be a witness."

"Marcy! Don't talk like that!"

"Sorry."

For the second time in less than an hour, Amanda peeked through the tiny peep hole in the door hoping to God it wasn't Agent Miller and Agent Barnes again.

And it wasn't, but she nearly lost it when she saw who it really was. In fact, she had to look twice to be sure.

"Well who is it?" Marcy asked impatiently.

"It's my cousin, I'll call you back later." Amanda told her.

"Okay, call me tomorrow."

"I will," Amanda assured her friend as she stared out the peep hole in shock. She turned off her phone and watched as he lifted his hand to the door bell, moving to press it one more time, then letting it fall and waving the thought away, turning on his heels to leave.

"Oh God, oh God, oh God," Amanda chanted as she quickly unlocked the door and yanked it open. "Don't leave!" she called to him.

JC turned to her and stopped, a completely blank expression spread across his stubbled face. Immediately Amanda felt the sting of tears return to her eyes. God must have been listening to her pleas, because this was the one thing she had been praying for all along.

He studied her for a second, his eyes sweeping over her from head to toe. Finally, after a minute too long, he rushed towards her. "Amanda, I've--"

"Don't say anything," she interrupted, "just hold me, please." She pushed her eyes closed, forcing back the burn of her tears.

But as his strong arms hurdled around her body, those tears that she'd been fighting away began to fall. She buried her cheek into his chest, sobbing quietly as he held her so close. The comfort of his embrace felt better than anything she could have possibly imagined. Suddenly her world felt just a little bit better.

"JC," she finally spoke softly, trying to hide her sniffles, "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have gotten so upset with you that morning."

"Shhh," he quieted her. "I'm the one who's sorry. Come on, let's go inside."
Amanda led the way, JC gripping on to her hand as they walked the few steps inside. He let go just for her to shut and the lock the door and then immediately pulled her into his arms for a second time. Tenderly he stroked her head and rubbed her back. "Sweetheart, what's going on?" he asked with concern. "Why did the news say that you were missing?"

Amanda held on to him even tighter. She had prayed every night since she'd arrived in New York that JC would just magically appear at her doorstep. She had never expected her wish to come true. Instead she'd assumed things were over forever. Thank God she was wrong. He did care after all, just like she knew in her heart that he did.

"I don't know," she answered, wiping away more tears and crinkling her nose with a sniffle. "There's a lot of crazy stuff going on right now. I'm just really glad you're here. I thought I'd lost you forever."

"Amanda, I... I care about you. Of course you haven't lost me forever."

"How did you find me?" she asked, still gripping on to him tightly.

"Marcy told me you were at your father's apartment. It wasn't that hard after that. I just looked up the address in the phone book."

"Thank God he's listed," Amanda remarked, hugging him even tighter, every inch of her body pressed up against his much stronger one.

JC let out a soft chuckle and brushed the hair away from her forehead before planting a tender kiss right in the middle of it. "You could've called me," he said softly.

"I know," she answered shyly, looking away from his stare.

"But I understand why you didn't," he told her.

"You do?" she asked, looking up at his handsome face.

Tenderly JC wiped away a tear from her cheek. "She's not in the picture anymore. I finally did what I should have done six months ago."

"You did?" Amanda asked.

"Yes, and I've been miserable ever since you left me on Sunday."

"You have?"

"Yes," he answered with a tiny chuckle. "Come on," he said and pulled her into the living room. "You have to tell me what's going on."

JC LISTENED AS Amanda explained to him everything that was going on with her father and the FBI. Honestly, he wasn't too shocked at it all. He had gotten a bad vibe from Jonathon Ballard just from that two seconds he'd been in his presence. The man just looked like he was up to something no good.

But poor Amanda. She'd had no clue and now her whole world was turned upside down. It broke his heart to think that she'd been in so much pain the past four days with no one to turn to--without him to turn to.

The look on her face when she'd opened the front door was one of desperation and exhaustion. He hated to see her like that. He hated to see her suffering. He wanted nothing more than to make all of her troubles go away and he'd do everything it took to see that they did.

"I still don't understand why they said you were missing," JC remarked. Amanda laid comfortably with her head on a pillow resting in his lap. She looked up at him with those pale green eyes and in turn he gently brushed a hand across her cheek.

"I don't know either. Unless my father reported me missing to distract the people looking for him."

"Babe, I don't think that's it," JC remarked. "No one's heard a word from him since he left, he'd have to show his face to do that."

"That's true," Amanda agreed, sitting up and turning sideways to face his direction. "How long are you staying?" she asked out of the blue.

An instant smile sprung to his lips as the words fell from her mouth. Not because of her question, but because of the Curious George look she had given him.
"I'm here till next week, we're rehearsing for a show."

"Oh, you didn't come all this way just for me?"

"No," he chuckled quietly, "turns out we just happened to both be here at the same time."

"Funny how that works, huh?" she asked.

"Maybe it was just fate."

"Do you believe in fate?" Amanda asked curiously.

"Of course," JC answered without hesitation. He knew it had been fate when he'd heard her playing the piano that night in the bar. It had to have been.

"Me too," Amanda smiled girlishly, "are you going to stay with me tonight or do you have to go back to your hotel?"

He reached for her hand and grasped it gently. He had missed the touch of her skin so much, even just holding her hand felt good. Would he stay? That was a silly question. Of course he would stay, as long as she wanted him to. "If you want me to stay, I will. But I have to be up by six."

"Should we just go to bed now then, so you're sure to get all of your beauty rest?" Amanda asked with a devilish grin.

"Beauty rest is important," he agreed with a smile. "You look like you're in need of it yourself."

"The past few days have been pretty exhausting," she sighed, falling back against the sofa.

JC stood up and reached out an arm to guide her. Amanda grabbed on and he pulled her up with one swift tug. "So where is your bedroom?" he asked. "We're not sleeping in your old twin bed or anything, are we?"

Amanda chuckled, grabbing on to his waist from behind. "It's not actually my bedroom," she explained, "it's just a guest room. I never actually lived here."

"Oh, well which one?"

"Down the hall to the left."

"Hop on," he told her, "I'll give you a lift."

"A piggyback ride?" She asked.

"Yeah."

JC kneeled down enough so she could hop on his back and Amanda did just that. He curled his arms underneath her legs and trotted towards the hall, her arms draped around his neck. Amanda giggled the entire way. "Don't drop me," she said.

"Come on now, give me a little credit." Playfully he bounced her down the hall way until he came to the only partially open door on the left. "This it?" he asked, nodding his head in its direction.

"Yep."

"You don't have anything in here I might not want to see before we go in, like hate pictures of me or anything?"

"Hate pictures?"

"Yeah," JC remarked, standing just in front of the door with Amanda still sitting on his back. "You know like posters with darts in my head."

"No," she said with a chuckle. "I promise there's nothing like that."

"Okay, good." JC pushed open the door with his foot. "Can you reach the light switch?"

"I think so. Or you could just put me down," she smirked.

"Just turn the light on so I can see," he told her.

Amanda held on tight with one arm while reaching the other to turn on the light, pretty much cutting off his air supply in the process.

"Uh," he gasped once she finally let him out of her choke hold. "I can breath again."

"Sorry."

"It's okay," he told her, skipping towards the bed and dropping her flat on the mattress once he got there. "How's that for service?" he asked as she laid on the bed giggling.

"Not bad."

"Not bad?"

"Yeah, not bad," she said playfully. "I'm used to the best so it's tough to compare."

"Oh really?" he asked, "we'll just see about that."

He sat down on the edge of the bed, his back facing Amanda, and untied his shoe laces. He had barely got the first one undone when he felt the tickle of her fingernails sliding underneath his shirt. Immediately he froze. Her palms flattened against him and the warmth of her hands slowly inched up his back.

"Do you have any idea how good that feels?" he asked with a low moan.

But Amanda didn't answer his question, instead he felt the softness of her lips pressing against the back of his neck as one hand slid around his chest and the other tangled itself in his hair.

"Shoes," he murmured. "I was taking off my shoes."

"Go ahead," she whispered, her lips delicately brushing against his ear.

"Oh man," JC groaned, kicking off his tennis shoes without bothering to untie the laces. Who cared about shoe laces at a time like this?

His eyes nearly rolled into the back of his head as she lightly traced her fingernails down his stomach, all the while her lips doing a dance of seduction across his neck. "What are you trying to do to me?" he asked, his voice low and needing.

"What do you think?" she asked, her teeth nipping across his ear lobe as she toyed with the waist of his pants.

"I think you already did it," he answered.

"Hmmm... did I?"

Unable to handle her torturous seduction any longer, he twisted out of her hold and nearly attacked her. Amanda let out a flirty laugh as she laid trapped underneath him. "Did you miss me?" she asked with a silly grin.

But they were words that were deeper than JC would have ever imagined because he had never dreamed of missing her so much. He buried his face into the side of her neck, taking in the faint scent of her hair and her perfume, just the scent of her period. With a deep sigh, he pressed his lips to her skin, almost losing himself in the taste of her. "You have no idea," he breathed, "I missed you more than I would have ever imagined."

(c) 2001 BrandyRae 

It must have been two in the morning when Amanda rolled in her bed and was reminded, happily, that she wasn't alone. Had last night been a dream? Because it almost felt unreal. JC had come to her rescue. The memories of the FBI agents and the awful things her father was putting her through faded in comparison to the images she held of JC before she had fallen asleep.

And it wasn't just the memory of their incredible lovemaking, either. Although, those thoughts did linger very close to the front of her mind. Were all men as passionate as he? In a way she almost wished she had something to compare to so she would know just exactly how wonderful he was, because in her world he was absolutely unbelievable. He made her feel so many things, so many wonderful things.

Even more incredible was the way he had held her in his arms so tight. How he comforted her and told her that everything would be okay. How he kissed her so tenderly and touched her as if nothing in the world mattered except for her.
Her eyes somewhat focused to the darkness, she studied him as he slept. He laid restfully on his stomach, his face turned the opposite direction, his silky brown curls sticking to the back of his neck. Instinctively Amanda took her fingers and ran them underneath his hair, freeing the trapped strands from his skin.

Almost instantly he stirred, a low muted moan rumbling from his throat. Slowly his head twisted to face her, his eyes blinking several times before focusing in on her softly. After a quiet minute, he smiled. "Ready for round three?" he asked devilishly.

"Are all men like you?" Amanda asked in reply.

JC smiled with satisfaction. It was obvious that Amanda's remark pleased his ego to say the least. "I don't know about all men, just me," he answered.

"I don't know about them either," she remarked.

"Guess we'll just have to assume they are then - or not."

"I don't think they are," Amanda decided.

"Maybe I'm not normally like this either. Maybe I just really like you a lot," JC debated.

With that Amanda had to smile, because that fact made her just a little bit giddy no matter how hard she tried to fight it. "As much as I'd love to believe that's it, I kinda doubt it," she told him.

"So you think just any woman would have this kind of affect on me?" he asked, sliding in closer to her and crossing one of his legs over the side of hers. "You think I'm just a big horn dog, or what?"

His use of words made Amanda chuckle. "Pretty much, yeah," she said through a smirk.

"Really, sweetheart," he said as he scooted in even closer, "you should never underestimate the power of you."

"The power of me?" she asked curiously, wrapping an arm around his trim waist.

If there was one thing that hadn't faded, it was the excitement of touching his bare skin. It felt better against her than anything she had ever felt in her entire life. He was strong and masculine, yet his skin was soft and inviting. He was the ideal man, at least in her eyes anyway.

"Yes," he assured, tapping his finger across the tip of her nose, "you."

"Whatever," Amanda replied, shrugging off the entire concept and instead tangling her body up against his, reveling in his exuded warmth. The comfort she felt laying so close to him compared to nothing she had ever experienced. It was almost as if all of her troubles vanished when he was holding her so tight. She could easily have stayed in that position for as long as her body would allow.

AS AMANDA'S DELICATE frame curled up against him, JC felt an overwhelming need to protect her. Every part of her felt so completely right. He realized, that in the wee hours of the morning when no other part of the world seemed to exist except for theirs, it would be incredibly easy to spill all his guts and reveal all the crazy emotions he was feeling towards her.

But as much as he wanted to do that, he forced himself to hold back. The funny thing was, he wasn't even sure why he was holding back. Look at what that had cost him before. He'd almost lost her.

"JC?" Amanda whispered, her cheek pressed against his bare chest, her soft voice knocking him from his train of thought.

"Hmmm?" he sounded in reply, his chin resting on the top of her head as she softly stroked her fingertips down the middle of his back. A sensation that made him tingle from head to toe. He could have easily laid there with his eyes closed, basking in her touch, for hours on end.

"Thank you for rescuing me," she said quietly.

Amanda's words only made his desire to open up to her grow stronger. "You don't have to thank me," he said, pulling back enough to look at her sweet face,

"I'm just glad that I found you."

"Me too," she agreed softly, "me too."

SIX AM CAME way too early. When the alarm went off, JC had half a mind to throw it across the room. Then he remembered it wasn't his and it probably wasn't a good idea to treat Amanda's clock like a football. But then he remembered that technically it wasn't Amanda's, it was her fathers and with that thought he almost picked it up and tossed it off the table anyway, but something in his head decided it still probably wasn't a good idea.

Amanda barely stirred as he sat up and hung his feet over the edge of the bed. JC tiredly reached for his pants off the floor and grabbed his phone out of the pocket.

He needed a ride back and he was pretty positive that Mike was going to be just thrilled to come pick him up.

The thought was there, but he had to rub his eyes and let out a rather loud yawn before he was actually able to dial the number. He stared at the phone grumpily, grimacing at the tiny device the whole time.

Finally he summoned up enough energy to dial.

As it rang for the third time, he felt the soft touch of Amanda's hand across his bare back. She was awake. Now he really didn't want to leave.

Finally Mike answered the phone, JC explaining to him in a hurry that he needed a ride back to the hotel. All the while, Amanda's fingers were tracing down his back and making it very difficult for him to concentrate on his conversation.

After discovering it would be probably a half an hour before Mike would be there to pick him up, JC hung up the phone, took in a deep sigh and crawled back in bed with Amanda.

"Shouldn't you be getting up?" she asked as he hugged on to her snugly, his body engulfing her fit frame.

"He won't be here for half an hour," JC explained, wrapping all of his limbs around her in a hold that was impossible for her to get out of.

"Don't fall back asleep. You know Mike will be really mad if he drives all the way here and then you don't hear the door and plus you'd miss rehearsal and you'd be in really big trouble."

"I'm not, I promise."

And he didn't, instead he laid there contently holding on to Amanda for a good ten more minutes before finally getting out of bed and waiting for Mike.

"Uh, I can't wait to take a shower," JC sighed, beginning to get impatient as twenty five minutes had passed and still no sign of his bodyguard. If he had to go, he wanted to go. He hated just waiting around. He hated depending on someone else. He should have just called a cab. Although, he still would have been waiting on someone else, it would have just been someone that he didn't know.

"You could have used mine," Amanda told him.

"I know, but I didn't bring any clothes to change into. It would have been kind of pointless."

"That's true," she said, "sorry," and flashed him a sympathetic grin, realizing he was getting a little antsy.

"It's not your fault. Sorry I'm such a grouch in the mornings," he told her, reaching for her forearm and gently pulling her into his arms. "Don't take it personally, okay?"

"I'm not," Amanda said, her head pressed against his chest. The door bell rang and JC immediately breathed a big sigh.

"Okay," he said, planting a quick kiss on her forehead, "call me after you finish your lunch with your cousin or whatever."

"I will," Amanda assured as he rushed towards the door.

"Bye," he told her, reaching for the door handle.

"Have fun at rehearsal," she smiled at him as he opened the door to find a grumpy looking Mike. He flashed her a quick wave and was out the door.

He followed Mike down the hallway without saying a word. The image of Amanda standing in her baby blue pajama pants and cute little tank top, standing there with that puppy dog look on her face, lingered in his mind. Undoubtedly it would more than likely hang around for the rest of the morning. Or until he became too busy to think about it, which would probably be at rehearsal. How come already he couldn't wait to see her again?

When the two men were safely inside the car, Mike gave JC the most condescending look. "What?" the younger man asked his gargantuan of a bodyguard.

"How did you sneak out without me knowing?" Mike asked, his hands resting stiffly on the steering wheel while he concentrated on the road in front of him.

"Oh, that. Yeah, I just called a taxi." JC revealed casually about his departure the night before. He shuffled in his seat, pulling his hat down farther on his head as he noticed a car full of young girls and their mother staring in his direction.

"That's pretty sneaky. You're lucky you didn't get into some sort of situation."

"Now how would that happen? I was at Amanda's apartment the entire time. We didn't go anywhere." JC reasoned, feeling like the conversation shouldn't have even been brought up in the first place. Really, it wasn't any of Mike's business what JC did with his spare time. If he wanted to take chance of getting mobbed, that was his business. He was a grown man, not some little boy. He could take care of himself. "If you're worried that I'll suddenly decide I don't need you anymore just because I decided to go out by myself for once, well...that's just not necessary."

Thankfully Mike dropped the subject after that. JC didn't feel he needed to explain his relationship with Amanda, or anyone else for that fact, to his body guard. Granted, the two were fairly close because they spent a lot of time together, but lately Mike had been a little edgy and JC was getting tired of it.

By the time they made it back to the hotel, JC had barely twenty minutes to shower and get dressed. He hurried up to his room and hopped in the shower immediately.

Of course the whole time he was in the shower he couldn't stop thinking about Amanda. Thoughts of her seemed to be sticking to him like glue. It wasn't normal for him to feel so distracted, but lately that's how he felt. Distracted with thoughts of her. The good part of it was, as soon as this benefit concert was finished he'd have quite a bit of time off and he wouldn't have to worry about being distracted. In fact, he'd be able to devote all his concentration on her and their relationship, wherever that might be headed. He wasn't exactly sure.

Just after seven, JC had left the hotel on time and was riding in the car with Lance - and company, of course - on their way to rehearsal. His younger friend spent nearly the entire ride on his cell phone, talking business of some sorts, which wasn't unusual. When Lance finally ended his call, he turned to JC with a curious glimpse. "So you found her. Did you find out why she was reported missing?"

But before JC could answer, Lance opened up his mouth again. "This is some situation you've gotten yourself into with this girl. I mean, what a mess. Her father is all over the news."

"He is?" JC asked curiously.

"Yes, something about fraud or embezzlement or something. I don't know, I was only half listening," Lance informed.

"Really?" JC asked with mild surprise, his brow crinkling into the center of his forehead after letting Lance's words sink in completely.

"Yes, really. So what's going on anyway?"

JC glanced up at the security staff in the front seats and decided he didn't want to air all of Amanda's business in front of the entire world. Lance was one thing, but the security staff was another. "I'm not sure exactly," JC told his friend quietly, "I'll tell you more later."

Lance nodded his head in agreement and didn't speak another word. If there was one thing that was true, after spending so much time with your four best friends, they could all pretty much read each others minds when it came right down to it.

AMANDA SAT ALONE in the restaurant Terra had designated for her cousin to meet her at. She didn't mind so much the fact that Terra was already fifteen minutes late. In fact, she kind of enjoyed the relaxing time alone, just people watching. Besides, Terra had been in the office all morning and Amanda was sure she'd probably gotten tied up, but would be walking through the door any minute.

For some reason, as she sat there waiting, a voice triggered her to turn around and glance back. Suddenly she realized that the voice belonged to a man she'd seen on more than one occasion over the past few weeks. Not just him, but the other man he was with, too. Quickly Amanda turned away, her heart rate kicking up several notches. It was obvious these two men had been following her. The question was, were they with the FBI or some shady organization her father had gotten involved with? She prayed to God it was just the FBI, that she could handle.

After another five minutes and no sign of Terra, Amanda began to grow even more nervous. All of the worst scenarios she could possibly imagine scrolled through her head over and over again. She couldn't just sit there wondering, she stood up and headed for the ladies room, knowing the two men couldn't possibly follow her in there.

She stomped inside the what-seemed-to-be empty room, casually checking all the stalls to double check. Then she stood in front of the mirror, braced both hands on the countertop and took in several deep breaths. "Calm down, Amanda," she told herself, "it's probably just the FBI. They just want to see if my father tries to contact me."

Amanda tried her best to believe her own convictions, but really she couldn't push aside the fact that she suddenly remembered seeing those two men in her hotel almost a month earlier. If they were FBI, why were they hanging around a month ago and why hadn't they talked to her sooner?

Her hands somewhat trembling, she dug for her cell phone in her purse. She stared at the numbers for a second debating on who to call, JC or Terra. She wanted to talk to JC, but she didn't want to bother him while he was rehearsing.

"Screw it," she said softly to herself, "he'll understand," and speed dialed his cell phone.

Unfortunately, all she got was his voice mail. "JC," she spoke nervously into the phone, "it's Amanda. Look, I'm sorry to bug you but I just realized that someone's following me. Not just today either, I think they've been following me for almost a month. I'm at the restaurant waiting for Terra. I'm sure she'll be here any minute so there's no need to worry. It's probably just the FBI, right? It's got to be. I mean, who else could it be? Okay, well, sorry again and call me when you get a chance. Bye."

Amanda hung up her phone and realized the message she'd just left was a little chaotic. She took in a few more deep breaths and tried her best to calm down before finally leaving the restroom and heading back to her table.

As soon as she got there, she realized Terra just walking through the front entrance and breathed an immediate sigh of relief.

"Sorry I'm late," her cousin apologized as she hurried to sit down, not even bothering to look at Amanda. But as soon as she did, her expression totally changed. "Manda, what's wrong? Why do you look like you just saw a ghost?"

Carefully Amanda leaned across the table and whispered, "I just realized that someone's been following me for like the past three weeks."

Terra's expression remained completely still and her head didn't move an inch, but her eyes were searching. Searching the restaurant and all the people in her view. "They're here now?" she asked equally as quiet, her mouth barely moving.

"Yes."

Amanda watched as her cousin sat back in her chair and casually picked up her menu, confusion clouding Amanda's thoughts. What the heck was she doing? Didn't she care?

With an exaggerated gasp, Terra set her menu back on the table and spoke rather loudly, "I thought they had clam chowder today and it was yesterday, let's go somewhere else," and scooted away from the table.

"Okay," Amanda agreed, understanding immediately.

Of course, as soon as they were in the car, Terra's mood immediately changed.

"Do you think it's the FBI?" she asked curiously, sitting behind the wheel of the car Amanda had rented for her stay. It was good Terra had instinctively hopped in the driver side because Amanda was way too worked up to drive.

"I don't know," Amanda answered, each word shaking from her lips, "it's not the men who visited me last night, so I don't know."

"Wait! The FBI visited you last night?" Terra asked with surprise.

"Oh God, I didn't tell you," Amanda sighed.

"No, you didn't." Terra remarked.

Amanda heard her phone chirping from her purse and quickly reached down to get it, hoping with all her might that it was JC. She had a hard time grasping onto the miniature device because her hands were trembling so badly.

"Hello?" she finally answered somewhat frantically.

"Amanda, are you okay? What's this about someone following you? Where are you?"

"JC, thank God it's you," she sighed into the phone, noticing her cousin's eyes bulging out of her head as the words fell from Amanda's lips. "I'm okay, I'm with Terra now."

"Please, tell me what's going on. How do you know someone's following you?"

Amanda explained to JC how she had recognized the two men in the restaurant and how it suddenly all just fit in to place. She also told him how she wasn't sure if they were FBI or not. She was beginning to realize what an utter mess her life had become. In just a short time it had went from complete normalcy to complete chaos, and now she was getting him all wrapped up in it, too.

"Okay, listen to me," he told her. "You have a number for the men that you talked to last night?"

"Yes," she answered, her voice a little calmer now since she was talking to him.

"Call them and talk to them. Tell them exactly what you told me."

"Okay," she agreed.

"And then get your butt here, okay? Don't argue. In fact, why don't you ask your cousin if she can drop you off because I don't want you driving. You're too worked up."

"JC, I don't even know how to get to where you are," Amanda told him, her voice teetering on the edge of a whine.

"I'm going to tell you how," he explained, his voice calm and soothing to her ears. Even over the phone he made her feel ten times better. Never in her entire life had Amanda depended on a man and suddenly she found herself needing him more than anything.

The line fell silent for more than a few seconds, Amanda still trying to regain her composure and calm down her heart rate by taking in deep breaths. "Hey," he said softly after their silent pause, "it's gonna be okay. Don't worry. I'm sure it's probably just the FBI. They're just waiting to see if your father tries to make contact with you."

"You really think so?" she asked.

"Why would anyone else be watching you?" he asked her. "It's gotta be them."

"You're right," she sighed with hope.

"Did you want me to give you the directions or did you want me to give them to your cousin?" he asked.

"You better give ‘em to her. Hold on a sec," Amanda told him, taking the phone from her ear and covering the little microphone with her palm. "Terr," she called to her cousin, "I know I have a lot to explain, but he wants to talk to you. I mean, if you could give me a ride to where he's rehearsing, he wants to give you directions."

"He's here? In Manhattan?" Terra asked somewhat disbelievingly. Obviously she had just been thrown for a major loop. A lot had happened in the time since she had seen Amanda the day before.

"Yes, and everything's fine now," Amanda assured.

"Okay, I'll drop you off but only because you're going to promise to tell me everything on the way to wherever he is. Oh, and we will stop for food on the way because I'm starving."

"Okay," Amanda agreed. She put the phone back up to her ear and said, "JC?"

"Yes?" he asked.

"Here she is," Amanda told him before handing over the phone to Terra. She half listened, hoping Terra didn't rip him to shreds after she'd seen Amanda so down over the past few days. Amanda knew now that it wasn't his fault she'd been so miserable, but Terra didn't and Amanda knew that her cousin could be a little overbearing when she wanted to be.

Her main concentration was out the side view mirror. She was trying her best to focus in on the two people in the car behind them and trying to figure out if it was the men in the restaurant or not.

"Manda, it's two old ladies, it's not them," Terra finally said, interrupting her conversation after realizing Amanda's paranoia.

"I knew that," she shrugged, still glimpsing out the mirror.

JC ENDED HIS call with Amanda and knew he was going to have a heck of a time finishing up with rehearsal. He had assured her that the men must have been the FBI. But what if they weren't? What if her father was involved with some big organized crime group or something? What if Amanda was in danger? What if he was in danger? Lord, he hadn't even thought about that. If that was the case he was putting everyone in danger. This was suddenly turning out to be a very bad situation.

With a bit of luck, she'd talk to the FBI Agents and they would be able to tell her what was going on.

It'd probably be a good twenty minutes before the girls got there, depending on traffic. JC had told Amanda to call as soon as they pulled into the parking lot and that way he could meet her at the door so she wouldn't have any problems with security.

Calmly he stood in the hallway just outside where the group was rehearsing and tried to wipe all of the despair from his face. Hopefully he wouldn't have to reveal all of the sketchy details to his friends. Why did all of these things have to be happening to her now of all times? As if there relationship hadn't gotten off to a rickety start as it was. Now this?

When the call finally came through some thirty minutes later, JC had just finished eating his lunch and they were going over their wardrobe for the show. He was thankful that Amanda sounded quite a bit more like herself this time.

"We're out front," she told him.

"Okay, give me two minutes."

"She here?" Justin asked as JC hopped up from his seat. He had told the guys his new girl was coming to visit, he hadn't informed them on all of her troubles.

"Yeah, I'll be right back," JC answered.

Taking the minute walk to the entrance, JC found himself more anxious then ever to see Amanda's sweet face. Something inside of him just had to physically witness that she was okay. He hated all the crap she was going through. It angered him more than anything. Amanda didn't deserve any of the nonsense her father was putting her through. God forbid JC ever run into the man face to face again. He might have a hard time holding back his feelings.

As he peeked around Big John, another one of their mighty security guards, he saw the two women walking up the concrete sidewalk. Immediately he smirked softly to himself at the image. Amanda and her cousin looked strikingly alike. Except for the different colors of their hair, it was obvious they were related. In fact, if JC wasn't positive Amanda had referred to Terra as her cousin several times, he could've sworn that they were sisters. They even had the same bouncy walk.

Just as they were a few feet away, JC popped out from behind Big John, who covered him completely, and then some, and smiled widely. "Hey," he said cheerfully, "you made it."

"We did," Amanda grinned in reply. He could sense that little bit of tension in her features as she neared. He hated to see that in her.

"Come on in," he told them as Big John stepped aside and let the ladies through.

"Don't mind Big John here," he said patting the hefty man on his shoulder, "he's all about intimidation but really he's as soft as a teddy bear."

Big John sneered with disagreement, "am not."

Amanda introduced her cousin to JC and vice versa before he led them to an empty corridor where he would feel safe asking her how her talk had went with the Agents. But first, he scooped her into his arms and hugged her like there was no tomorrow.

"Well?" he asked, letting her take a step out of his embrace, "did you talk to them?"

"They said I don't have anything to worry about and that I'm not in any danger," Amanda explained.

"So it was them?" he asked curiously.

"They wouldn't tell me."

"It was them," Terra interjected, "they just didn't want to say - yes, we're following you."

"I think so, too," JC agreed, looking at them both and having a hard time wiping the smile off his face. "Are you sure you two aren't sisters instead of cousins?" He just had to ask, he couldn't believe how much they looked alike. "You guys look a lot alike."

Both women glanced at each other for a second and then looked back at him with curious smirks across their faces. "My mom was her dad's sister," Amanda explained, "I mean, her dad's my uncle."

"I guess we do look a little bit alike," Terra remarked, studying her cousin curiously. "I never really thought about it."

"Well we haven't seen each other in awhile," Amanda added, looking over Terra and then returning her gaze to JC. "I don't know, I guess."

"Anyway, I've gotta get back. We're you gonna stay Terra?" JC asked.

He noticed the corners of Terra's mouth turn up just a little as she looked at him and then looked at her cousin. "Can I meet Justin?" she finally asked.

JC was used to that kind of attention, but Amanda's jaw nearly dropped in surprise. "Terra!" she gasped at her cousins outright boldness.

"What?" her cousin asked naively, "I'm only human."

JC let out a soft chuckle and reached for Amanda's hand. "Come on, I'll introduce you," he said, glancing over at Terra's overly-happy face. He could tell she was really trying to disguise her excitement, but he was used to those types of reactions and could spot them a mile away.

BEING IN A ROOM with so many people she didn't know was a little bit uncomfortable for Amanda. Of course, everyone was very cordial and nice, but still, the only two other people she had come in contact with were Justin and Chris and those were both very quick instances at the hotel. Oh, and of course Mike, but he didn't count because Amanda was sure that he hated her.

Terra was, of course, her normally cheerful self and Amanda was thankful that she decided to stick around. Even if it wasn't very long, because she was sure her cousin would have to get back to work sometime before too long.

When the guys finally made way to the stage to rehearse, Amanda was in complete awe. She'd had no idea. They were absolutely incredible. And this was just rehearsal! No wonder why so many girls went crazy for them. Now she understood.

And she definitely understood what Marcy had meant about him being able to move. He grinded and swayed like he was born to be on that stage. And his voice, his voice was just beautiful and melodic. Up until that point, it had never fully hit her who she was becoming involved with. Yes, she knew he was famous and she knew he was very busy, but now she knew why and she completely understood.

JC was absolutely amazing.

As soon as JC had a little bit of a break, while the choreographer was going over some of the moves with Lance and Joey, he headed straight for Amanda and her cousin.

"Manda, wipe that silly grin off your face. What's wrong with you. You look like you're in love with the guy or something," her cousin whispered in her ear.

Instantly Amanda did as Terra said. Was it that obvious? Boy, she really was in trouble if that was the case. She had just never expected to be so captivated by him when he was on stage. He really did know how to move.

As soon as JC sat down beside Amanda, taking a giant swig of his bottled water, Terra made the announcement that she had to get going.

"I should walk you out," Amanda said.

"No, I can get out myself. What about your car?"

"Oh crap, I didn't even think about that." Amanda sighed.

"Your car?" JC asked curiously before gulping down the rest of his water.

"My rental," Amanda explained.

"We can pick it up later," JC decided.

Amanda scratched the back of her head and glanced at JC beside her. He was completely taking control and as unusual as it felt to her, it also felt really good. No one had taken care of her that way in a very long time. It felt very comforting to know that she wasn't alone.

Looking back at Terra, Amanda realized the satisfaction in her cousins green eyes. Huh, green... The same color as hers. Okay, so maybe they did look a lot alike. But that was beside the point. The point was, she could see that Terra was pleased with JC's efforts and the way he seemed to care so deeply about her.
Terra smiled and stood, "that'll work," she said and extended her hand to properly say goodbye. "It was nice meeting you, JC," she said. "You're lucky you turned out the way you did or you might have gotten one hell of an earful from me."

"Terra..." Amanda gasped for the second time since they'd arrived.

"Manda, you know it's true. Don't give me that look."

"It's okay," JC remarked. "I would've probably given me an earful too if I were you."

"So," Terra pointed at her cousin, "you call me later to let me know when you want to pick up the car."

"Okay," Amanda agreed.

"I'll see you guys later." Terra waved a quick goodbye and hurried on her way.
Amanda turned to JC and he casually rested his hand on her knee. "You okay?" he asked her softly.

"Yeah, I'm okay."

"We'll be outta here soon and then I'll make you feel better," he said with a suggestive wink right before brushing his thumb over her cheek.

"I think I feel better already," she smiled.

"I do tend to have that affect on women," he grinned proudly.

"Yeah, I bet," Amanda rolled her eyes in response.

One of the guys whistled at him from the stage and JC pecked her on the cheek in a hurry, "I'll be done soon. Promise," he said as he stood and jogged back towards the others. Amanda didn't mind waiting. She was enjoying the entertainment thoroughly.

(c) 2001 BrandyRae 

Chapter 20

Amanda climbed into the roomy Ford Excursion between JC and Joey, presumably riding back to their hotel. She hadn't really asked too many questions. Maybe because she had given him one hundred percent of her trust and was sure that if they were going somewhere else, it wouldn't be anything she would mind.

They were barely on the road when Joey pulled out his wallet and started handing Amanda pictures. "This is my baby girl," he said, "isn't she cute?"

Amanda couldn't disagree with that, although she'd had no idea he had a daughter. "She's adorable," Amanda remarked, "how old is she?"

"Just six months," Joey explained, a gleeful grin slapped across his face. "Do you have any kids?"

That was probably the last question Amanda would've ever expected to hear.

Obviously JC hadn't informed his friends about her inexperience, which was kind of nice to know.

"Joey," JC called to him, "what the hell kind of question is that?"

Big John chuckled from the front seat. Amanda imagined the conversation probably did sound a little funny.

"I didn't mean anything by it," Joey assured leaning forward to look at JC. "I was just curious," he continued, leaning back into his seat and returning his attention to Amanda. "I know you're a little bit older, so I thought - "

"It's okay," Amanda told him. "No, I don't have any kids."

"Yeah, I kinda got that."

"Joey's just a proud papa, that's all," JC remarked.

"And he should be, she's very cute," Amanda commented.

"And smart, too," Joey added.

"She must take after her mom," Big John teased from the front, a deep laughter bellowing from his throat and spreading throughout the vehicle. Even Joey had enough sense of humor to laugh at himself.

The conversation continued as they sat in the car for the next twenty minutes. Joey rambled on about his daughter while Big John surfed through the radio stations. Amanda was beginning to realize that JC had really great friends as everyone had been genuinely nice to her so far. And Joey was making a definite effort to get to know her better. He made her feel very comfortable.

When they finally arrived at the hotel, Amanda realized she was witnessing things from a completely different aspect than she'd been accustomed to. Screaming fans adorned the street, security keeping a secure path open to the front entrance. The two big security guards got out of the vehicle first while the others sat there and waited. "Don't worry," Joey remarked, looking back at Amanda with a grin, "it looks a lot worse than it is."

"Just concentrate on the doors," JC told her as his hand fell to her shoulder and soothingly massaged her neck. "I'll be right behind you."

"Okay," Amanda replied, wishing nothing more than that hand to stay right their on her tension-filled shoulder. But of course, as soon as Big John opened the door for them, JC let go.

Joey stepped out first and Amanda followed, concentrating on the back of his head the entire time and trying her best to block out the screams. It was amazing the energy coming from all of the fans. She'd never experienced anything like it. Sure there had been some crazy girls at her hotel, but she really hadn't gotten a taste of it from the other side. Walking through them while they were screaming "JC!" and "Joey!" and tons of other things, was something completely different than she'd ever felt before.

When they finally made it inside the hotel, things calmed down quite a bit. Only guests of the hotel were allowed inside and, not surprisingly, there were a few fans that had obviously gotten a room just to get a better chance of seeing one of the guys. But security held them back and Joey and JC went straight to the elevators where one was being held open for them so they didn't have to wait.

As soon as the doors closed, JC looked down at Amanda and gave her a reassuring smile. "I told you my life was crazy," he remarked.

"Crazy's not exactly what I would call it," Joey said, "to me it's just busy and fulfilling."

"Well, yeah. That too," JC agreed.

Amanda only looked up at him with a grin, she wasn't sure how to respond. All she knew was that he was letting her into his life and showing her things that she had never seen before. After all she'd experienced over the last two weeks, it would be hard to go back to her normal routine at the hotel - if there even was a hotel after things settled with her father.

"Sorry if my room's a little messy," JC told her as he unlocked his room door. "I was in a big hurry this morning."

"Thanks to me," Amanda remarked with a shy grin.

"Yeah, thanks to you, sweetheart." He looked at her with that twinkle in his blue eyes, an undeniable sexiness in his voice as he spoke, and Amanda could've melted right there on the spot. And the way he called her sweetheart, well she couldn't even explain what that did to her insides.

She followed him into the room, which was a little messy, but not too bad. Housekeeping had obviously done their job because the bed was made and there was no trash lying around. Actually, the only thing unorganized about it was his clothing laying over the back of a chair and a couple of shopping bags setting against the dresser.

"I'm gonna hop in the shower," JC told her as he kicked off his sneakers, "make yourself comfortable. It won't take me very long. Oh, and you should probably call Terra and find out when would be a good time to pick up your rental."

"Yeah, I probably should."

JC looked at her with a devilish smile and winked playfully before disappearing into the bathroom. Amanda's head spinning thanks to the cute gesture. She sat down on the edge of his bed and just breathed for a minute or two. Then she pulled out her phone to call Terra at the office.

After being transferred by the receptionist, finally Amanda's cousin came on the line. "Terra Williams," she answered professionally.

"Terr, it's me."

"Oh, hold on, let me close my office door."

A half a minute passed and then Terra was back on the phone full of cheer.

"Okay," she gasped, "let me just tell you that watching those boys shake their thangs made me feel like I was fifteen again. I haven't been able to concentrate at all since I got back to the office."

Amanda chuckled with amusement. "They were pretty spectacular," she commented.

"And I must tell you that I was a little unsure about this whole thing of you dating some gigantic pop star or whatever, but he's a nice guy so I give you my approval."

"Thanks," Amanda replied, as if she had been looking for her cousin's approval.

The girls talked a little bit more about nothing before finally deciding that Amanda could pick up the car in a couple hours, after Terra had made it home.

Just as Amanda hung up the phone, the bathroom door opened and JC's head popped out of the doorway, his hair practically dripping wet and steam floating off of his bare shoulders. Every time she looked at him she was reminded of how absolutely gorgeous he was, and every time she was reminded, she nearly had to pinch herself to be sure it was all real. To go from no attention at all from the opposite sex, to attention from probably the most attractive man she'd ever met, was quite a stretch. But she wasn't complaining about it, that's for damn sure.

He grinned at her, still peeking around the door frame. "I forgot my pants," he remarked boyishly.

"Would you like me to grab them for you?" she asked.

"Please?"

Amanda spotted a dark blue pair of warm up pants folded neatly on top of his suitcase and immediately rose from the bed to grab them. As she turned to head towards him, she couldn't help but notice his absence of clothing, the only piece of material covering his muscularly fit frame being a thin white towel. Boy, you'd think they'd have nicer towels. Never the less, she certainly didn't mind the fact that it wasn't the plushiest piece of white terrycloth. In fact, she was more than a little excited about it.

She handed him his pants, trying her best to wipe away the goofy grin stamped across her face and bring her eyes away from his nakedness, but it was tough.

"Thanks," he said with a chuckle and disappeared back into the bathroom.

Amanda plopped down on the floral print bedspread with that cheesy smile still glued to her face. Aimlessly she flipped through the channels, although television was definitely the farthest thing from her mind.

JC came out of the bathroom a few minutes later, vigorously rubbing the towel over his head. "Did you talk to Terra?" he asked.

Amanda only stared dumbfounded, thoughts of him in that towel intermingled with the image in front of her - JC wearing only his warm ups and the muscles in his arms and chest constricting and flexing with every move he made.

"Hello?" he asked her with an amused grin after not receiving a response the first time.

"Oh, yeah. Yeah, I did. She's gonna call me in a couple hours when she gets home," Amanda finally explained.

Dropping the towel onto the floor, his hair damp and curly, looking more tempting than ever, JC crawled onto the bed beside her and fluffed a couple pillows behind his back. "So, what did you want to do?" he asked. "Did you need to go back to your place?"

"I dunno," Amanda shrugged.

"You don't know what you wanna do?" he asked, letting his hand fall to her shoulder and applying just the right amount of pressure to her tension-filled muscle. Immediately Amanda's head fell forward and her eyes automatically shut. It had been a stressful day and his touch was just what she needed. "Baby, you are really tense," he said, his other hand joining in on the opposite shoulder.

Amanda couldn't help but let out a satisfying moan, "you don't know how good that feels."

"Lay down and I'll give you a back rub," he suggested.

Amanda had no hesitation on that one. "Okay," she agreed hastily.

Before she felt the strong touch of his hands, she felt the weight of his body crawling over her and taking a seat on her behind. His fingertips brushed over the back of her neck, goose bumps forming immediately, as he scooped her hair out of the way and then began to work the stress out of her shoulders and neck.

She swore she must've died and gone to Heaven. His fingers kneaded and pressed into her flesh as if he were an expert. She was beginning to wonder if there was anything he didn't do well, because from what she'd seen so far he was absolutely perfect. Or maybe she was just completely blinded by love...

That was a scary thought.

Amanda wasn't sure how long her wonderful massage lasted, it felt too good to worry about time. All she knew was afterward her body seemed to have turned to complete mush. He rolled off her back and returned to his seat at the head of the king-sized bed. Amanda remained completely still. She felt way too relaxed to move.

"You asleep?" he asked softly.

"Uh, not quite," she answered, her head still not budging an inch. "Are you sure you're a singer and not a professional masseuse?"

JC chuckled, "well actually..." he joked.

Finally Amanda found the energy to gaze in his direction, but her head still laid planted in the pillow. "I keep waiting for you to do something bad," she told him,

"is there anything you're not good at?"

"Not that I can think of," he answered with a playful grin.

"I didn't think so," Amanda agreed, only she was being serious.

"I'm far from perfect. Trust me."

With a sigh Amanda rolled onto her side and propped her head up on one arm.

"JC," she said with a deep breath, "all this crap that's going on with my dad. Does that make you a little nervous to be around me?"

JC KNEW HE HAD to tell her the truth. He wasn't exactly thrilled with everything that was going on. In all honesty, he'd love for the whole situation to just disappear. But it didn't make him want to stop seeing her. That he knew for sure.
"Honestly," he breathed, "I'd definitely be a lot more happy if it weren't happening. You know? It'd be nice if there were no complications, but I guess that just wouldn't be life, now, would it?"

He paused for a moment and glanced up at the ceiling. The last thing he wanted to do was say the wrong thing.

"It definitely, in no way, makes me want to not see you anymore. To answer your question, it doesn't really make me nervous. I guess it makes me more mad than anything. Your dad is definitely NOT on my list of favorite people. I know that's your dad and all, but I can't help it Amanda. What he's putting you through is just wrong. Dad's aren't supposed to do these kind of things to their daughters."

Amanda sat up, staring at him with those pale green eyes and visibly taking in a deep breath. She tucked a strand of her auburn colored hair behind each ear and brushed it away from her shoulders. He could see the tension in her face as she let her gaze fall to her lap, crossing her legs Indian style in front of her. "You're right," she sighed. "We've never been close, but I never imagined him getting involved in something so incredibly wrong. I'm just really sorry that I've got you involved in this."

"Sweetheart, you don't have to apologize to me. I'm glad to be here for you. Okay? The time that we've spent together may not seem like that long, but I feel a connection with you that I've never felt with anyone else. Don't worry about what you're putting me through. That's the last thing on my mind and it should be the last thing on yours."

He watched as she took in another deep breath, hoping that she would accept his words for the truth, because they most definitely were.

Tenderly he grabbed onto her arm and smiled, "come here," he said, pulling on her gently. Her body scooted closer, but it still wasn't good enough. Opening his arms wide, he repeated it again, "come here."

"Where?" she asked, a little unsure.

"Here." He patted his hands against his thighs as he said it one more time. Finally she complied.

As she straddled him, taking seat directly on his lap, he tried hard not to think of the reasons he really wanted her there. Instead he wrapped his arms around her and pulled her against his chest, hugging on to her slender frame and stroking the back of her head.

"Don't worry, it will get better. All this will end soon and life will go back to normal."

"Will it?" she asked, her voice a little shaky. "What if they take the hotel? Then what? Then what will I do?"

"Whatever you want to do, sweetheart. You don't need that hotel to live your life. You can do whatever you want. Hey, maybe it would even turn out for the better." He knew it would turn out for the better, but he wasn't going to just out right say that.

"Maybe," she sighed, the warmth of her cheek against his shoulder as she spoke. Her breasts pressed against his skin as she leaned all of her weight into his body. It took every bit of his control to fight off the arousal from just her sitting on his lap.

The cold hit his skin as she drew back enough to look him in the face. "Amanda, you have the power to do whatever you want with your life. Don't be afraid of the future. The future's what you make of it," he assured her.

"I know," she replied, looking at him with weary eyes. "It's just ever since my mom got sick, I had the security of the hotel. Before that I didn't care. I didn't want to stay in that hotel. But after she died, that's all I wanted. To just run the hotel and live my life where..." Her voice drifted off as she turned away, glancing off into space.

"Where what?" he asked caringly.

"Where she did," Amanda finally answered softly, refusing to look him in the eye.
Suddenly he understood. Amanda didn't want to leave the hotel because that was the one attachment she still had to her mother. Without that she'd feel as if she'd lost all ties to the one person who loved her more than anything else in the world.

His heart ached just thinking about how she must feel.

Affectionately he traced his fingers across her cheek and nudged her chin in his direction. "Baby," he spoke softly, "no matter what happens with the hotel, you'll always have the memories of your mom. No one can take those away."

"I know that," she said, a tear trickling from her eye as she blinked.

Her tears only made him feel more vengeance towards her father. As far as JC was concerned, it was all his fault. All of it. He pressed his lips to her cheek, catching her salty tear. "Don't cry, sweetheart," he told her quietly.

"I'm sorry," she said, "I'm being a big baby. I know. My life is just a mess."
Her watery eyes blinked and more tears fell. Immediately JC wiped them away with his fingers. "You're not being a baby," he told her softly, "it's not good to hold in your feelings. Let it out and you'll feel a lot better."

"I'm not a person who cries often and in the past two days you've seen me cry twice," she sniffled, obviously a little frustrated with herself.

"It's okay," he told her, but he was having a hard time getting the right words out himself. Really, he just wanted to tell her that he wanted to be the one that she came to when she was feeling down. That there was no need for her to feel upset about showing him her feelings. He wanted to be there for her, no matter what.

"It's not okay," she said, shaking her head with aggravation as she slid off his lap.

"I need a tissue," she mumbled as she hopped off the bed.

"Damn Jace, that didn't come out right at all," he scolded himself quietly after she vanished into the bathroom, the loud echoing of Amanda blowing her nose penetrating through the thin walls. He had to chuckle a little at that, only because she sounded similar to the roar of an elephant and he would have never expected such a loud noise to come from such a small nose.

When she finally stepped out of the bathroom, that smile was left smeared across his face. Not just because of her loud nose blowing, but also because he was realizing that she was absolutely adorable when she was so frustrated with herself.

"What are you smiling about?" she asked, stepping towards the bed with a wad of extra tissue in one hand.

"You're not gonna blow that thing out here, are you?" he asked teasingly, "you might throw me through a wall or something."

"Oh my god, you heard me?" she asked with surprise, stopping dead in her tracks.

"Yep."

"Sorry," she grinned with embarrassment.

JC hopped of the bed and trotted towards her in a hurry. "You know I'm just playin' with you, right?" he asked, "Besides, don't feel bad, you think you're loud? You should hear Justin. He's really bad."

Finally a smile broke through, her watery eyes glistened as her stare locked with his. "Really?" she asked, "or are you just saying that to make feel better?"

"Really," he answered, "I won't EVEN tell you what other disgusting habits those guys have."

"Because you don't have any disgusting habits, right?" she asked.

"No, I'm perfect. Remember?"

AMANDA WAS MORE than thankful when the call came in that Terra was home, it would be Big John giving them a ride, not Mike. Apparently, JC had told her, Mike had been really grumpy for the past month and JC was a little upset with him. Big John, on the other hand, always seemed to be smiling. Amanda liked him much better.

It was after seven when they finally arrived at Terra's apartment. Big John walked them up to Terra's door and then said good bye. He didn't even heed a warning about going out in public like Mike would have. He was definitely much more laid back.

Terra had been expecting them and answered the door immediately, almost as if she'd been standing there waiting. She let them inside, grasping on to a bowl of steaming white rice with broccoli and chicken on top. Instantly Amanda's mouth began to water. They hadn't eaten yet and she was starving.

The plan was to order take-out when they got back to her apartment. JC had packed an overnight bag and already made arrangements for Big John to pick him up in the morning.

"Did you guys eat yet?" Terra asked, "I've got more if you're hungry."

"Thanks, but we're gonna order something when we get home," Amanda answered, even though her tummy was rumbling with each whiff of Terra's food.

"Okay, well your keys are on the counter. Let me grab ‘em." Terra scurried to the opposite end of the room, grabbing the set of rental keys off the bar area that divided the living room and the kitchen. Terra's apartment was neatly decorated and tidy, but it was also pretty obvious that not a lot of time was spent there.

Terra was a workaholic, which was clear from the stack of files and the laptop sitting on her kitchen table.

Terra came back with the keys and gave Amanda a hug. "Call me tomorrow," she told her.

As the couple headed down the elevator to the parking garage, JC grabbed Amanda's hand and sneakily worked the keys from her fingers. "I'll drive," he said with a grin.

"That's fine." Amanda didn't mind if he drove. There was certainly no fight there.

All she really wanted was to get home - to her temporary home, that is - put on something comfortable, eat dinner and relax, with JC of course. She was more than thankful that he would be spending another night with her. His presence not only made her feel safe and secure, but it also helped her to sleep better for some reason. It was as if nothing in the world mattered when his arms were wrapped around her tight, nothing but the two of them.

Chivalrously, JC unlocked Amanda's door and opened it, waiting as she hopped inside the mid-sized rental car. She watched as he leaned down and his face closed in towards hers. The warmth of his soft lips pressed against her forehead, his hand sweeping back her hair simultaneously. "It's been a long day, hasn't it?"

"Yes, too long," Amanda agreed as he backed away.

He smiled as he shut her door and then jogged around to the driver's side.
The drive back to her apartment was quiet. Every so often he'd look over and smile, or reach to brush his fingers against her thigh, Amanda melting with every touch and gesture he made. She couldn't help but notice that every word he said or move he made exuded a caring that was so deep she was having a difficult time not mistaking it for love. But surely he couldn't love her already.

Even though she was pretty damn sure that she already loved him.

CURIOUSLY AMANDA peered out at the dark street through one of the living room windows. "You think they're watching me right now?" she called to JC, who was sprawled out comfortably on the sofa. With their bellies filled with Chinese food, neither of them had been very motivated to do anything except lay around. Looking down at a few cars parked on the street, she stuck her hand out to the side and waved, as if she were signaling to one of her closest friends. "Hello FBI men," she muttered playfully.

The coldness of the glass chilled her fingertips as she rested them against the window. For a moment she only stared, wondering what it was her father was doing right at that very moment and if the FBI had any clue where they could find him. She certainly did not.

With surprise, JC's strong hands graced each side of her waist, his body slowly pressing up behind her. Immediately Amanda felt the arousal he brought on so suddenly. "We could give ‘em something to watch," he remarked suggestively.
His arm wrapped around her waist from behind, locking her body up against him as he planted his feet right against her own. "Or we could..." With skilled softness, his fingertips trailed down her body, skimming across the side of her breast before eventually curling against the other side of her waist, where he hugged on to her snugly. "...go to bed and do anything but sleep," he continued, his voice a breathy whisper as he leaned into her ear, every syllable dripping with scandalous seduction. Amanda had grown warm just thinking about what that meant.

"Exactly what would that entail?" she asked, not quite ready for their little game to end. Her hands, which had been hanging free, reached behind her and grasped onto his trim, muscular thighs. In turn, he pressed himself against her even harder, his heightened sex pushing against the roundness of her backside.

The tip of his tongue traced along the outside of her lobe and immediately Amanda's breath sharpened. His hand sneaking just underneath the hem of her short t-shirt, he whispered something seductive and enticing into her ear. She moaned softly in return, a jolt of need swirling low in her belly as his soft touch inched up her stomach.

"But enough about what I want," he finally told her, his voice still dangerously low and inviting as he breathed against her neck. "What do you want?"

"I want you."

"I know that, sweetheart," he said, nipping at her neck lightly as he spoke, "tell me how you want me. Tell me what you want me to do to you."

Amanda's breath was heavy and her heart was racing off the charts. He wanted her to actually tell him what she wanted? Well what the heck did he think she wanted? Didn't he realize she was still new to all this? "You know what I want."
One lone finger trailed down the side of her face as he leaned to try and get a glimpse of her from the side. "Don't be shy." His lips fell to her cheek in a soft and sultry gather. "Trust me, anything you ask I will do."

If he was trying to break her out of her shell, it was working. If nothing more because she was so incredibly turned on, at that point, she would do just about anything to make him give her what she wanted. Anything you ask, I will do. She wondered how many women would kill to hear words like that.

"I want you to touch me," she whispered, the words barely falling from her lips.

"That's a good start," he replied with a hungry moan. "What else?"

Closing her eyes, she relished in the strength of his hand against her abdomen, anticipating its climb as it wavered against the underside of her breasts. "I want you to kiss me," she spoke softly

"Where?" he asked, planting a tender kiss to the side of her neck.

Amanda moaned at the touch of his lips against her skin, but also because he was teasing her terribly and it was absolutely driving her insane. Desire surging through her body like an overload of electricity, she turned around quickly in his arms, immediately covering his mouth with her lips, riding that wave of arousal and pressing every inch of her body up against him. Consuming him and every ounce of sexual desire that he emitted.

"Everywhere," she finally breathed, tearing her lips away just long enough to speak.

As their mouths and tongues meshed together in a fiery dance of passion, JC effortlessly hoisted her into his arms and carried her to the sofa, where he laid her down gently and then met her body with his weight, their lips barely parting for a second.

Suddenly it was as if they couldn't have each other fast enough. Clothing flew off quickly, as if it were a race to the finish. It wasn't long before he was inside her, her hips bucking to meet his rhythm as he undoubtedly brought her over the edge, waves of ecstasy flowing through her body, one right after the other as she screamed his name with pure delight. He followed quickly with a sensual moan, breathing obscenities under his breath as he clutched onto her tightly, his hands pressed into her hips and controlling every tiny move she made until he was completely spent.

Breathily, he collapsed against her, their bodies still united as his weight rested against her. "I really did plan on doing all of those things to you," he finally spoke, his chest heaving against hers with each breath he took, "but once you kissed me, I just couldn't wait."

"I guess will just have to keep trying until you get it right, then," Amanda suggested, "I mean, I do have a lot of lost years to make up for. You think you can help me out?"

JC groaned in agreement, "I'm sure as hell not gonna let someone else help you in that department."

(c) 2001 BrandyRae 

Chapter 21

Amanda rose from her sleep, frightfully awake in an instant. "What was that?" she asked nervously, turning to JC, who should have been beside her, but instead had already made it out of bed and was stepping into his pants.

"I heard it, too," he informed her, "stay here."

She watched in the darkness as he quietly left the room, shutting the door almost noiselessly behind him. Now she was alone after there'd been some strange sound in the house. What if it was some one who'd come to hurt her? Someone who was trying to get revenge against her father? But wait! JC! What if they hurt him? With a sudden new awareness, she hopped out of bed and jumped into her pajamas.

As soon as she opened the bedroom door she heard it. "Who the hell are you and what the hell are you doing in my house!" Uh oh, Amanda knew that voice all too well. It was her father.

But that wasn't the only voice she heard. "Me! You have a lot of room to talk after all you've put your daughter through!"

Oh Lord, this was not good. Putting all of her energy to her feet, Amanda ran like the wind into the living room as fast as she possibly could.

What she found when she got there was more than a little alarming. In the midst of the dark manly decor stood her father and JC staring each other down like they were life long enemies. JC's fists clenched tightly at his sides and her father looked like a volcano about to blow any second.

Automatically she pushed her body in between the two angry men, backing up against JC and stretching her arms out in front of her father, not giving him any room to move closer. "Dad, calm down," she stated with force.

"Amanda, who is this? What's going on here?" Her father asked sternly, his eyes piercing into her like a knife as they darted back and forth from her to the man she cared about so much standing behind her.

"This is my boyfriend, JC, but that's not the issue right now. I wanna know what's going on. Why is the FBI following me? Why are they looking for you? Why was the news saying that I was missing? What the hell is going on? I want some answers, now." The words poured out quickly as she finally found the strength to stand up to the one person she'd never been able to.

Immediately his gaze softened and fell to the floor. His guilt poured like a fawcett. He didn't have to say a word, it was written all over his face. "I'm turning myself in," her father announced solemnly.

For a moment, Amanda could do nothing but stare in shock. Her feet seemed frozen to the floor as she couldn't move one limb on her body. Suddenly a world of confusion bounded her, circling her with rapid force and almost making her dizzy in the process.

Jonathon Ballard had been many things to her throughout her life, but never had he been the one thing she needed the most. A father. She wasn't exactly sure what she was supposed to feel of all this. He was turning himself in? All this time she had hoped that there was some chance it was all a mistake. That maybe he wasn't responsible for all the pain and trouble that she'd been through. That he wasn't capable of doing something so terrible it would make the FBI hunt him down. But turning himself in? That meant only one thing. He was capable. He was guilty. He was responsible for everything.

JC's hand brushed against her shoulder supportively, Amanda instantly looking up at his caring face behind her. "I'll be in the other room," he told her softly, giving her father one more glance and then turning and walking away.

Somehow they made it over to the sofa. Amanda wasn't sure if he'd asked or if she'd asked, but either way, they were sitting down and obviously had a lot of talking to do. Regardless of his explanation, he was wrong. He was hurtful, deceitful and wrong. He'd put Amanda through hell, let alone whatever the future was about to pour on her, with him no doubt ending up in prison. Just wrong. That's all she could think. He was so wrong in so many ways. What kind of man would do something to jeopardize the life of his only daughter. To put her in a position that would endanger her and the lives of the people she cared about.

As he spoke to her, all Amanda could do was stare at the tiny scar just on top of his thick, dark eyebrow. It had been there for her entire life. It had faded with age, but Amanda could still focus in, studying its squiggly little shape, something similar to a tiny bolt of lightening. To this day she'd never known the cause of it. He'd never once told her how or why it was there, but every so often he'd rub a hand across his brow and the tip of his finger would linger on top of that scar. As if its memory crept back up and bit him right in the face.

"So things are going to be changing," she caught him say. Those words somehow registering in her frazzled brain. Yes, she understood things would be changing. He would be going away, not that he was ever around anyway, and Amanda would absolutely be on her own. That was just fine. She didn't have a problem with that.

"So, will you be allowed to have visitors while you're in prison?" she asked coldly, as if she wanted it to sting him. Hoping that he'd feel as lousy as she'd felt for the past week, knowing that her father was involved in something that would inevitably rub off on her as well. Something that would cause people to look down on her because her father had done something unacceptable. Even though, as he tried to explain, she had yet to catch what it was exactly he had done.

But he didn't answer her question, instead he just stared. Not directly at her, mind you, but out into emptiness. A world of thoughts surely running through his brain. If Amanda hadn't been so upset with him, she might have actually felt sorry for him.

"I'm not sure what's going to happen to me," he replied instead, "but I want you to know that you have nothing to worry about. The hotel is yours, it always has been."

But those words didn't... He couldn't have said... The hotel was hers? How could that be? Completely alert, she sat up stiff on the sofa and looked straight into his dark shadowy eyes. "What do you mean it's mine?" she asked with disbelief.

"It became yours when your mother passed away, Amanda. It's all yours."
Letting her head fall into her hands, she breathed in deeply, trying to calm herself and make sense of it all. Every memory of her childhood, and beyond, included that hotel. She'd always just assumed it belonged to her father. That it became a part of her mother's life after they were married. But as she racked her brain of the fond memories she kept under lock and key, she realized that wasn't the case at all.

Her mom had always been happiest when she was working at the hotel, taking care of guests and mingling with the different people. It had always been her mothers pride and joy and now she understood why.

"Your mother inherited that hotel when your grandfather passed away," he explained, "and she in turn has passed it on to you. She loved being there. I never understood why. I wanted to move here, to New York, where we could be right in the middle of everything. She wouldn't have it." The sting of tears crept to her eyes as he spoke of her. His wife. Amanda's mother. Victoria Ballard.

Since she'd died he never mentioned her name. Amanda hated the way he'd pretended she never existed. How he went on living like nothing was wrong. Like no one was missing. Like she wasn't missing. Amanda willed her eyes closed, forcing back the threat of tears. A weakness she in no way wanted him to observe. She'd be damned if she let him see her cry. She'd been too proud for too long to let it all crumble now.

"I don't blame her, I wouldn't have wanted to move here either," Amanda finally spoke, the bitterness lingering in her tone. If she let her resentment fade than she might feel sympathy and that was the last thing she wanted to do.

Visibly he swallowed, leaning onto his knees and bringing his face just a little closer to hers from across the table. "I'm sorry for everything you're going through right now, but I don't have a lot of time. Just understand that no matter what I'm still your father and I do love you."

If he was looking for her forgiveness, Amanda wasn't quite sure if she was ready for that.

"I know that we've never been very close and that I've probably been a little too hard on you all these years, but it was for your own good."

From the tops of her eyes, she glared at him. Realizing he only seemed to be avoiding the real subject. His apologetic words didn't explain why he had gotten to that place to begin with. "You still haven't told me anything," she finally said, "why are you in trouble? What did you do? Why was I on the news? I mean, that's what I really want to know. Why was my picture on the news? I mean, my friends actually thought I was missing. People were worried. Why?"

His gaze fluttered down to the floor, as it had several other times during the conversation. "I'm not sure exactly why the news reported you missing. I didn't do it."

"Okay, well what about everything else? Where have you been for the past five days? And who are the men in those pictures the FBI showed me? Oh, and do you know I've been being followed for I don't know how long?"

"Amanda, sweetheart - "

"I AM NOT your sweetheart," Amanda interrupted profusely. The lack of information he was giving her was pushing her past the boundary of control. If he didn't tell her something soon she was going to explode.

JC HADN'T BEEN eavesdropping. Really he hadn't. But when he heard Amanda shouting, he couldn't help but think maybe he should check to make sure she was okay. He certainly couldn't go back to sleep, there was no question there. He was going to be a zombie the following day at rehearsal, but that was the farthest concern from his mind.

He almost had to chuckle at the sound of her words. I am not your sweetheart. Was she his sweetheart? Knowing it wasn't a time to be thinking along those lines, he couldn't help but let the thought slip for just a moment. Because she most certainly was his sweetheart. And his girlfriend, too, from the sounds of her introduction.

Finally, Amanda was standing up to her father. That made JC proud. It had taken every ounce of energy in his body to hold back from slugging Amanda's dad when they'd met dead center in the living room. Jonathon Ballard was the last person JC had expected to see. Actually, he hadn't expected to see a person period. He'd figured the noise was something else. Anything else. He didn't know what, but definitely something other than what it was.

Now it was all going down. This was the big finale, hopefully, and then maybe he and Amanda would actually get to start a normal relationship. Well, somewhat normal. He wouldn't exactly call any of his relationships normal with his lifestyle.

Realizing that things had gotten awful quiet in the living room, he stepped up to the bedroom door and peeked his head out just enough to get an earful. He still didn't hear anything. That worried him a little. He wasn't sure what the man was capable of. Was he so dirty he'd harm his own daughter? Concern welling up inside his chest, JC pulled open the door and moved out into the hall, but before he had taken two footsteps across the plush carpet, Amanda came barreling around the corner, running right smack into him.

He caught her in his arms as if he'd predicted her speedy arrival, automatically curling his limbs around her. "You alright?" he asked as she buried her cheek into his chest.

"He's gone," she sighed, her breath heavy against him. "I told him I was calling the FBI and he left. He said to tell them he'd be turning himself in first thing in the morning."

"But are you okay?" JC asked again, still gripping onto her tightly. She felt cold against his skin and the only thing he could think of doing was warming her up.

"You feel really cold."

"I'm freezing," she agreed.

"So did you already call the FBI or did you need to do that still?" he asked, rubbing his palms vigorously up and down the lengths of her arms, hoping to warm her a little.

"I already did," she answered. Her arms locked around his waist so tight, JC didn't dare try to move his feet for he'd surely loose his balance.

"Do you wanna talk about it?" he asked, not wanting to dig into it too much unless she was ready, but his curiosity was killing him. More importantly, he didn't want Amanda to keep any of her feelings locked up inside. She needed to know that he was there for her and she could talk to him about anything.

"There's not a whole lot to talk about," she said, taking in heavy breaths against his chest, her cheek pressing his t-shirt into his skin. "He wouldn't tell me what he did or give me any answers."

"Oh." JC was a little surprised that her father didn't fess up to his wrongdoings. Especially after he was turning himself in. There was only one reason he could think why her father wouldn't tell her. "Maybe he was too ashamed to tell you what he did."

"So instead I'll have to hear it on the news, like everyone else? Is that fair?"
The frustration in her voice was obvious. He hated that Amanda felt so helpless and upset. "No, sweetheart, it's not fair. I'm sure the FBI will fill you in as soon as they have him in custody."

"I'm not sure that I even want to know, JC." Amanda sighed hopelessly, resting against him and squeezing him even tighter than before. "I just want it to all go away."

And if he could, he would make it all go away. If only he could snap his fingers and make her life just the way she wanted it to be. "Don't worry, baby. It'll all be over soon."

Amanda's tore her cheek away from him and tilted her chin up, searching his eyes for the comfort she so desperately needed and that he was unquestionably there to give. "I hope you're right," she breathed restlessly.

It seemed just as they had fallen back to sleep, JC's alarm went off and he had to get up for rehearsal. He tried his best not to disturb Amanda as he crawled from the warmth of her bed. His eyes were heavy and his body was tired. It was going to be a long day, no doubt about that. He only hoped Amanda would gain some sort of closure with her father's surrender to the FBI.

Trying to jumpstart his lifeless body into awareness, he headed straight for the bathroom, hoping a shower would do the trick. Normally it did, but today he was so tired he wasn't sure if it would work or not. Regardless of how he felt, he had a long rehearsal day ahead and, besides that, he needed to stay strong for Amanda. He couldn't let his weariness interfere with her emotional exhaustion. Right now her needs were more important than his.

By the time he finished his shower and threw on his clothes, Amanda was already awake. He found her sitting on the edge of her bed, quietly holding the cordless phone in her lap. It was obvious by the grim look on her face that she hadn't been awakened to good news, that was for sure.

He rushed towards her, sitting down beside her and wrapping an arm supportively over her shoulders. "Babe, are you okay?" he asked softly.

"That was Agent Barnes. They just arrested my father," she explained solemnly, still cradling the receiver in one hand.

"Sweetheart, I'm sorry." JC tried his best to comfort her, taking the phone from her grasp and replacing it with his hand in hers.

"I'm okay," she sighed. "It's just - you know, I had hoped that it wouldn't come to this. That maybe there was a mistake. But it's all real. He's really..." Her voice drifted as she stared down at the tan colored carpet.

JC's heart ached to see her in such turmoil. Hadn't Amanda been through enough with the passing of her mother? Now she was losing her father, too. He couldn't even imagine what she was going through. Tenderly he placed a soft kiss to her temple. "I know, sweetie," he told her in a near whisper. "It's gonna be okay, though. I promise."

He could almost see the struggle in her eyes as she took in a deep breath and pulled her sight to his. "I have to go back today," she said quietly.

Those were the last words JC was expecting. She was going back? Already? "You're leaving?"

"Yes, things are a mess at the hotel and I have to make sure the staff understands their jobs are safe. Besides, there's gonna be a ton of press and I should probably meet with my attorney and - "

All of that made sense, but still - "you're leaving?" he repeated.

Amanda paused, staring him straight in the eye, her hand still cradled against him as he held onto her now tighter than he had been before. "But I'll see you again, right?" she asked uneasily, almost as if she'd been afraid to speak the words.

"Well, yeah. Of course." Tenderly JC brushed his free hand across her cheek.

"I was just hoping you'd be here for the benefit show."

"I'm sorry."

JC realized he couldn't let his own selfishness get the best of him. Amanda had a lot of responsibilities and she couldn't just hang around with him for the next four or five days doing nothing. "No, I'm sorry. I shouldn't be making you feel bad because you have to leave. I understand."

"Believe me," she grinned softly, "I don't want to leave. I'd rather stay here and just avoid everything, but the longer I stay the worse it will be when I get back."

"I know," he told her softly, "besides, I'll have a lot of time off after the show so I'll be able to come see you."

"You will?" she asked, her grin widening with her words.

"Yes."

"Things might be a little crazy. I hope you don't mind?"

Bringing a hand to her cheek, he smoothed his thumb across the silkiness of her skin. "I don't think that would be anything new. Do you?" he asked with a grin.

"No, I guess not."

As his eyes studied her, all of the love and caring he felt welled up inside his chest. Desperately he wanted to confess his undying love for her, but at the same time he just couldn't push the words out of his mouth. Instead he only stared at her blankly, his body aching inside because he cared so much. All the while, Amanda sitting there quietly, taking in deep breaths and, most definitely, dreading the following weeks to come. Poor Amanda, she had been through so much and it wasn't even over yet.

Finally, he broke the silence, but not with the words he should have been saying. "Have you made your flight arrangements yet? What time are you leaving?"

"Oh, no. I haven't done that yet. Hopefully they'll have a flight for me today."
Tugging on the hand he'd been keeping for the last five minutes, he pulled her into his chest, wrapping his other arm around her back. "I'll miss you, but I guess I'll live" he remarked with a teasing whine.

"I'll miss you, too," she said softly, her cheek pressed into his shoulder, the warmth of her skin penetrating through his thin shirt and consuming his entire body. He hated to let her go, even if it was only for a few days.

JC was a little surprised when he got the call from Amanda later that morning, explaining that she couldn't get a flight until the following day. He was surprised, plus he was happy, because that meant he had one more whole night with her. He was so excited, he told her to pack up all her stuff and meet him at rehearsal. Then she could stay the night with him at the hotel. Besides, it was a lot closer to the airport than the apartment.

Of course, once she got to rehearsal she was pretty much on the phone the entire time. He noticed her every so often, as the guys would take a breather, sitting in the very back of the room just talking away. JC knew what she was doing. She was trying to get things in order from her phone since she couldn't be there in person, but all he really wanted to see her do was relax. Amanda was very determined, that much was obvious, and when she had a job to do she took it very seriously. He'd guess she inherited that savvy business head from her father. Even with his shady wrongdoings, the man was known worldwide as a tycoon. Evidently, that's why poor Amanda was so worried about all the press she was about to get. He didn't blame her. If there was one thing he could sympathize with, it was being exploited by the media.

Amanda looked so confident and put-together from across the room. Like she knew exactly what she wanted and what she was doing, but JC knew differently. Inside Amanda was struggling with some very personal issues and that façade she put up was like a clear coat to him.

But still, he had to admit, that confident image struck him as being very sexy. That might not be saying a whole lot, though, since she always struck him as sexy. Maybe it was that concentrating-look on her face as she stared off into nothingness, speaking with some faceless voice on the opposite end of the country.

Or it could have been the way her legs were crossed in that semi-short skirt of hers. Just enough to show off the strong muscles in her legs. If there was one thing Amanda had, it was really nice legs.

It couldn't have been the way her blouse clung to her breasts in such a teasing fashion. The way that top button hung open just enough to barely give him a glimpse. Nope, that couldn't have been it at all.

Okay, maybe it was.

"Hey, idiot." JC chose not to answer to his friends not-so-kind words. Instead he ignored Chris' swaying back and forth behind him. Until JC felt a soft shove against his shoulder. "You should take a picture and then you could look at her all the time, even when she's not there," the older man continued.

"Really? Does that work?" JC responded with sarcasm.

"Yep, it's this amazing new technology. You should really check it out."

With a roll of his eyes, he tore his sight away from Amanda and instead dropped it onto his band mate, a discouraging look hovering across his face.

"You're not normal," JC remarked casually and hopped off the stage in an instant.

"Yeah, well...you're not either!" Chris' shouting echoed from behind. JC smirked to himself as he trotted towards his girl.

Giving her a wink, he took seat in the fold-up chair beside her and immediately scooted it closer, letting her crossed legs find their way between his own as he stared at her in waiting. Waiting for her to finish her call.

She smiled. A hold-on-I'll-be-off-in-a-minute smile and JC playfully traced a finger along her kneecap in response. He was impatient and, for some reason, the fact that all of her attention wasn't being directed towards him made him a little jealous. Although, he knew that was silly and selfish, but he couldn't help it. Why couldn't business wait until tomorrow when he wouldn't be there with her?

Finally, after another minute she slapped her phone shut and slid it into her purse. "Sorry," she grinned. "That was my attorney for the fifth time in the past hour."

"I'm sorry you have to go through all this crap," JC replied, still teasing her knee with his fingertip. He looked up at her with the best puppy dog eyes he could muster, hoping to get some sympathy. "I just can't wait to get you all to myself," he whined quietly.

Immediately her eyes lit up and a smile eased across her lips. "Me either," she agreed, "how long till you're done?"

"Another hour or so," he answered.

"Good."

"So are you ready for a nice relaxing evening, just the two of us?" he asked with a suggestive grin.

"Mmmm, definitely." Did she even know what that humming sound did to him? It made him crazy from head to toe. It chimed some inner bell inside him that turned all of his senses on high alert. He couldn't wait until they got back to the hotel.

"Me too," he agreed, "more than you know."

"I think I have a pretty good guess." She smiled again, this time letting it stretch all the way to her eyes. It was a beautiful smile. Every time he looked at Amanda she seemed to grow more and more beautiful. "I think they're waiting for you," she said after a brief silence, her eyes darting in the direction of the stage.

"Oh, yeah. Guess I should get back to work."

"Probably a good idea," Amanda smirked.

JC stood up and pushed his chair away in the process, "it won't be much longer, promise," he told her right before jogging back towards the rest of the guys.

That last hour of rehearsal seemed to drag by. JC was tired, but he didn't let it get to him. In fact, he was trying his best to ignore it. As much as he loved his sleep, Amanda was going back home the next morning and he had to make the best out of their night. Even if he would see her again soon. That wasn't the point. The point was he was going to miss her way too much while she was gone.

AMANDA WATCHED AS JC collapsed onto the bed once they made it safely to his room. He was exhausted and it was all her fault. She had kept him awake most of the night. She and her father. Then to work a full day, such strenuous physical work. She felt terribly guilty for his exhaustion. And here he was trying to give her some incredible romantic night when all he really needed to do was sleep. Guilty. Man, she felt guilty.

Standing only a few feet away from the door, she automatically reached for the handle after a sudden knock pounded from the hallway. "Must be my luggage," she remarked.

"Most likely," JC agreed from his collapsed state on the mattress.

But when Amanda opened the door, it wasn't her luggage at all. It was two young girls, somewhere in their mid-teens, with wide eyes and voices on the verge of a scream. Until, to their disappointment, Amanda opened the door. She stood there with open eyes, waiting for what would come next.

"Oops, sorry!" One of the girls laughed and the other immediately chimed in before both scurried down the hall.

Quickly Amanda shut the door and locked it, just to be safe. "Oops is right," she mumbled.

"Was it your luggage?" JC asked, his head facing the opposite direction as he laid out flat on his stomach, both legs sprawled from one end of the bed to the other and his arms stretched out wide away from him. It was almost as if he had gone splat right on to the comforter.

"No, it was two teenage girls."

"Good thing you answered and not me." He couldn't have been more right about that. JC needed to rest, not deal with fans.

Amanda wedged her behind into one of the empty spots on the bed, since he was taking up nearly all of it, and placed a hand on his back. "You should take a nap," she told him thoughtfully.

"If I go to sleep I won't wake up," he answered back, his voice a little muffled as his face was half sunken into the pillow.

"But you need to get some rest. I know you're exhausted. Thanks to me you didn't get any sleep last night," argued Amanda.

His body almost lifeless, one arm unexpectedly pulled itself up and swung around her waist, tugging her down beside him. A tiny gasp escaped her lungs as he turned his head to face her. "I'll only rest if you rest with me," he propositioned. Even with the tiredness in his eyes, Amanda could still see that swirl of desire lingering in the background.

"I suppose if that's what it takes," she remarked with sigh. A playful sigh. She was actually pretty wiped herself. Emotionally, it had been a very draining twenty-four hours.

Slowly he began to scoot towards her, his arm still locking her down onto the bed as his face neared her cheek. Instantly she was aware of the affect his closeness slapped upon her. A fact that seemed to remain true no matter what kind of position they were in.

"It does," he murmured against her, the lusciousness of his lips dangerously close to her neck.

The knock on the door, which was surely her suitcase this time, didn't cause him to budge an inch as he seductively trailed his lips along her skin. "Uh, JC -" Amanda tried to speak, but she had to let out a breathy sigh in between her words because his kisses felt absolutely amazing, as always. "I think that's my luggage," she managed to force out with a mumble.

"Probably," he agreed casually, but dare not letting her go. His arm hugged over her stomach so firmly there was no way she'd win the battle.

"I should get it. I mean, I do need it."

He agreed with a low humm, the strength of his hand sliding across her stomach. As the knock repeated itself, Amanda sat up in an instant. She tried brushing the lust-filled look off her face as she stood, but was afraid she didn't have much luck. Glancing back at JC, he had the most sinful looking grin across his lips. As if he had so much control over her from just a taste of his lips.

Okay, maybe he did.

At any rate, she had to get her suitcase. With that now in mind, she hurried to the door and retrieved it from the bell hop.

When she came back, JC had quietly made way into the shower, evident thanks to the pitter patter sound coming from the bathroom and also because he had, she was sure, purposely, left the door partially open.

Was it an invitation? Amanda had never showered with a man before, but she was definitely ready to give it a shot. Hell, she was ready to give just about anything a shot with him.

Of course, her curiosity got the best of her as she just had to peek inside. Too bad she couldn't see a whole lot thanks to the frosted doors already filled with steam. That must have been one heck of a hot shower. As she leaned her head in just another nudge, her elbow accidentally smacked against the door and sent it creakily opening, almost, completely. Her breath stopped short in her chest. She'd been caught.

"Amanda..." His voice nearly sang to her as it drawled out her name, hanging on every syllable.

"Hmm?" she asked, embarrassment warming her cheeks. As if she had a reason to be embarrassed. She knew she didn't, but she couldn't help it. He was naked, in the shower, and she'd never exactly been in that position before. Plus, she'd been caught snooping! How embarrassing was that?

"You gonna join me?" he asked, peeking over the top of the shower doors. Just that little glimpse of his wet head and his sultry blue eyes made her cringe with desire. Would she join him? Of course, she would.

In fact, she didn't even answer. Instead she began peeling off her clothing as fast as possible.

The steaming hot droplets stung her skin as she stepped inside and slid in front of him. "Too hot?" he asked, more than likely reading the look of pain from her face.

"A little."

Reaching around her, his bare body brushed against her as he adjusted the knobs on the fawcett. "Give it a sec," he said, standing upright and clutching her in a wet and warm embrace. Her eyes floated across his shoulders, following the strong contours of his body all the way to his feet. He was a work of art, completely gorgeous from head to toe.

And especially sexy when he was dripping wet.

Pulling her body against him, he brushed her now-damp hair back away from her face and kissed her lightly on the forehead. "I take it that was your suitcase and not another lost teenager?" he asked with a grin, his arms dangling around her waist as every inch of his nakedness pressed against her.

"Yes, it was."

"Good, because I'd hate for you to not have any clean clothes to change into. I mean, God forbid you have to spend the rest of the night like this."

"God forbid," she agreed with a smile, having finally learned his sarcasm and now able to recognize it in an second.

"Amanda..." He said it so softly she almost couldn't hear it under the sound of the pounding water droplets. "I - " He stared straight into her eyes, tracing a finger down the side of her cheek. For a brief moment, she forgot to breath. Was he going to say it? Was he going to tell her that he loved her? Did he love her? He must. How could he act so passionate towards someone he didn't. "I don't want you to go," he finally said softly.

Finally remembering to breath, she pushed away her mild disappointment and looked into his caring eyes. "I don't want to go either," she sighed softly.
But she had to. There was no way out of it.

(c) 2001 BrandyRae 

Chapter 22

Remnants of the night before floated in and out of Amanda's head during her plane ride home. Her head leaning back against the seat and her eyes tightly closed, she only half slept. The other half of her brain was stuck in a world of JC. With all the clutter and noise around her tuned out, she lost herself in thoughts and memories. Wonderful memories. She was in love. Truly, deeply, madly in love.

It had only taken a heartfelt goodbye to realize it. Not two minutes after she left, she knew. She was in love, and practically floating on a cloud.

So this was how it felt? She'd often wondered if she'd know when the time came that it was actually happening. In fact, one of her greatest fears was that she wouldn't realize until it was too late. That she'd look back and say, I loved him but I never knew until it was too late.

Thank God that's not how it really worked. She was positive about it, and as soon as she figured out the right way to tell him, she would.

Maybe...

She'd never actually confessed her love to a man before. What if he didn't feel the same?

But that was silly, right? Obviously he felt something towards her. He was awfully affectionate with her and he did promise to come visit her as soon as he was done with his benefit show. That had to mean something, right?

She sure as hell hoped so.

When the plane finally landed late that morning, a smile was glued across her face. The entire ride in the taxi, a smile was glued to her face. Then, as she finally made way inside the hotel, that same smile swept from one ear to the other. She'd never been so incredibly happy in her whole entire life. Even with all the chaos, it just didn't seem to matter. Amanda was in love and nothing could ruin her day. Nothing.
Except for maybe the stack of papers on her desk and the fifty-plus voice mails that were on her machine. Oh lord, she didn't even want to think about going through all of that.

But still, somehow, she managed to keep that smile.

Of course, the warm welcome back she received didn't hurt. All of the staff seemed genuinely thrilled to see her. Which made her feel good because she had missed them too in some weird sort of way. She couldn't even express how thankful she was to find everything still in one piece when she returned. Finally that vision of returning to a hotel in shambles faded. Of course, she realized now she should've had more faith in them than that. Everyone knew what they were doing and knew how to do their jobs very well.

Sifting through her mail, her mind had a tendency to wander from time to time. She couldn't put a finger on which memory she enjoyed the most. Was it that last night with their steamy shower and that comforting feeling of just kicking back together and relaxing. Or maybe it was the night before with the way he'd seductively taken her in the living room.

That brought an instant grin to her face.

There were so many wonderful memories, and just the thought of each little detail made her completely giddy. She'd never been so thankful for having a person in her life. Never.

Well, except for her mother, but she supposed that was different. She wasn't so thankful for the time spent with her mother until it was too late. She was thankful for JC right when she was supposed to be, now.

By the time she finished with her mail it was three in the afternoon and since her inner clock was so screwy, thanks to the time change, she was pooped. Her voice mail could wait till tomorrow. She was calling it a day. Tomorrow she would get a fresh start on all the calls she'd need to return.

One more thing she dreaded to think about.

Amanda had barely stepped out of her office and locked the door when she heard the pat of footsteps scurrying towards her. Instinctively she looked up to find a relieved but overly-antsy Marcy. The woman looked liked she'd aged five years in the last week. Perhaps she cared more about Amanda than Amanda had realized. Or maybe her father's situation had just put stress on everyone, which was very likely.

Turning to her friend, Amanda had just begun to open her mouth to say hello when Marcy's actions threw her into a stupor. Marcy hadn't said a word. Instead she curled her arms around Amanda in a thankful hug and gasped. "Are you okay? Why are you working? You should be resting."

"Why do I need to be resting?" Amanda asked curiously, "Things are a mess around here. I need to get back to work."

Marcy took a step back and curiously studied Amanda's eyes. The bounce in the older woman's blond blocks stilled as she failed to move her head one inch. "No, they're not. You've had one helluva week. I know, because I've had one, too. I can only imagine what yours has been like."

Actually, Amanda thought, minus the crap with her father her week had been pretty damn good. But Marcy was right, she had been through way too much stress over the last two days alone. Which is probably why she felt so exhausted. That and the screwy clock in her head.

"And I wanna hear all about it. I really do," Amanda sighed, "but right now I just want to go upstairs and take a nice hot bath."

"I don't blame you. I wasn't coming here to report on things while you were gone. I just wanted to make sure you were okay." Marcy clarified.

"I'm okay, thanks." Amanda grinned at her friend, thinking of ending the conversation quick so she could get home. When her phone buzzed in her pocket a couple seconds later, she'd forgotten it was in there and it nearly scared the crap out of her. "Ooh," she sounded with a tiny jump as she reached into the pocket of her suit coat.

Marcy only stood there, watching.

Amanda knew who it was before she even answered. It was six o'clock in New York. JC was finished with rehearsal and back at his hotel, missing her. How nice did that sound? He missed her. God, she was giddy.

"Hello?" She answered.

"Hey, sweetheart. How are you holding up without me?" The sound of his words and the sweet tone of his voice must have immediately sent a sparkle to her eyes because Marcy gave her this all-knowing grin and waved goodbye. Just like that, she turned on her heels and left Amanda alone.

"I'm hanging in there," Amanda responded as she slowly began to stroll down the hall. "I'm actually just leaving my office."

"You just now finished working?" Amanda could hear him gasp through the phone, his disapproval floating through the air and sinking right into her head. "You're gonna work yourself to death."

"No I'm not," Amanda argued. "I've been gone for a week. I've got a lot of work to do."

"I'm sure you do, but it can wait till tomorrow. You don't need to be working this late."

"It's not that late here."

"Yeah, but you're still stuck on Eastern Time," he debated. "You know what I mean."

As Amanda unlocked her front door, the phone still pressed to her ear as their conversation continued. She wished nothing more than to be opening the door to find him waiting on the other side. This was going to be harder than she'd imagined. She'd never felt so attached before. Sleeping was going to be rather difficult - and lonely.

IT MUST HAVE BEEN two a.m. when she twisted in her blankets, reaching across the emptiness of her bed. Her condo seemed quite a bit colder than it normally did. Or maybe she'd just grown accustomed to the heat that had slept beside her for the past three nights.

With a heavy sigh, she sat up and rubbed her eyes tiredly. She'd tossed and turned all night. All in all, she'd probably only got a good hour or two of sleep.

Noticing the red digits of the alarm clock, her intuition had served her right. It was just after two. Looking down at her hands she counted on her fingers, even though it was an unnecessary action. It was two a.m., which meant it was five a.m., JC time. He was still sleeping. There was no way she could call and wake him up.

But oh, how she'd just kill to hear his voice. She'd never imagined being apart from someone could be so difficult. How could she have grown so used to him being there already?

Wearily she slipped her legs over the side of the bed and stood up. She was cold and another blanket might just do the trick. Although she had a feeling it wouldn't. Really, all she wanted was to get some sleep.

Tomorrow would be a busy day and she needed to be fully alert and awake. It would drag on forever if she was tired.

After pulling her warmest, thickest blanket out of the closet and throwing it neatly over the top of her bed, she crawled back under the covers and pretended that JC was sleeping beside her. She thought of his strong arm curled over her side and the warmth of his stomach pressed against her back. She wasn't sure how, but finally she managed to drift off to sleep.

When the obnoxious ring of the phone jerked her out of a deep sleep sometime later, she was positive it was JC. Groggily reaching for the receiver, she mentally noted that no one else on earth would be calling her at a quarter till four in the morning.

"Hello?" she answered, immediately clearing her throat and repeating it after hearing the crackly sound that came out the first time.

"I'm sorry to wake you, sweetheart, but I just had to hear your voice before I left for rehearsal."

With her eyes still closed, she hugged the phone to the side of her face.

"I miss you, too," she said softly.

"I won't keep you up, I just wanted to tell you that I hope you have a great day and not to work too hard."

"Okay," she replied. For a few seconds, all she could hear was the sound of him breathing on the other end of the line. She realized that even the sound of his breath made her feel better.

"Call me later, okay?"

"I will," Amanda agreed.

"Go back to sleep," he told her softly.

"Okay."

"Bye sweetheart."

"Bye." Amanda waited until she heard him hang up and then fumbled to place the phone back on the nightstand. Luckily, she was tired enough to fall right back to sleep. It seemed that hearing his voice may have been just what she needed.

THE NEXT DAY was busy to say the least. But when she finally got around to checking all of her messages that morning, she was tickled to find at least a half dozen of them were from JC. In all of which he sounded just a little desperate. Here she'd thought the entire time he'd just totally blown her off when actually he'd called more than a few times, making a very good effort. Although, she had sort of known that already since he did end up finding her. Thank God.

Her life would be completely different if he hadn't. She'd hate to imagine all the chaos without his support.

It was almost lunch time when her assistant brought by a package that had just been delivered. As soon as Amanda took it into her possession she had to smile because it was from Terra. Even though she had absolutely no idea what her cousin would be sending to her already.

Retreating back to the privacy of her office, she sat the brown, rectangular box on her desk and opened it carefully. On top laid a piece of paper folded neatly in half. As soon as Amanda picked it up the rest of the box's contents were revealed. Or rather, the nature of the contents. The first thing her eyes caught sight of was an *NSYNC Live from Madison Square Garden DVD. Just the thought sent Amanda into an immediate fit of giggles.

She loved her cousin. Why did Terra have to live so far away? Who else would be so kind to send every *NSYNC video and CD to her?

Chuckling, she opened up the note and read her cousin's message.

My Dear Cousin Amanda,

You can't date such a huge pop star like JC and not know anything about his group. I took the liberty of stopping by my local Tower Records and picking you up the necessities. Make sure you do your homework before he comes to visit you. I'm sure he'll just love it when their new song comes on the radio and you know all the words.

But seriously, take care of yourself and call me soon. I miss you and I love you and I'm thinking about you always.

Love,
Terra

Replacing all of the items neatly back into the box, Amanda decided she'd run it upstairs before meeting Marcy for lunch at noon. She was looking forward to her homework already. It might not be as good as the real thing, but it was better than nothing.

Of course, as she was getting on the elevator, Marcy was getting off.

"It's only a quarter till," Amanda said, "I thought we were gonna meet in the restaurant."

"We were but Jenny came in early and I thought I'd meet you at your office. What's in the box?"

"Oh," Amanda smiled, "just a little homework that my cousin sent me."

"Your cousin? In New York? Homework?" Marcy asked with a confused squint as Amanda stepped into the elevator beside her.

Amanda only chuckled softly and handed her friend the box. Shuffling through it, Marcy immediately understood. "Ohhh," she sounded, looking up at Amanda with an all-knowing smile.

"I was just gonna drop it off before we met for lunch," Amanda informed.

"Homework, huh? Is that what you call watching your boyfriend's videos nowadays?"

With a smirk Amanda rolled her eyes inconspicuously. "He's not really my boyfriend."

"Well, whatever."

"I mean, I guess. Sort of." Honestly, Amanda wasn't sure what she was supposed to call him. She had told her father he was her boyfriend, but what else was she supposed to say? She couldn't tell her dad it was just some guy she was sleeping with. That would have gone over real well.

Besides the sex part had been pretty obvious since he'd been in his pajamas and it was like two in the morning at the time. What else would he have been doing there?

Marcy laughed quietly to herself as she punched the button to Amanda's floor. "You don't have to try and explain to me, really."

"Yeah, I know. It's just, you know - complicated."

"I'm sure it is."

The elevator grew quiet after that, just the sound of the voiceless music playing softly through the speaker.

"As long as you're happy with the situation," Marcy finally added right before the bell sounded for the eighteenth floor.

"Of course I am. What do you mean by that?" Amanda asked, almost defensively, as the two women walked fast-paced towards Amanda's door.

"Just what I said," Marcy answered.

"He's not like stringing me along or anything. He broke up with HER."

"I know, I know. Don't get all defensive on me, now. I was just making a comment, that's all."

Amanda fidgeted with her keys before unlocking her apartment door.

"Why would you make a comment like that, though?" She asked.

Frankly, Marcy's sudden change in attitude about the whole thing surprised the heck out of her. "I mean, you were the one urging me to go for it."

"Yes, and I still am. I just want -"

"What?" Amanda asked as she opened her door and dropped the package just inside on the table.

"Never mind. Just forget I even said anything," Marcy urged, waving the thought away with her hand.

"How can I forget now?" Amanda asked, shutting her door and locking it tight.

"It's just obvious that you're head over heels in love with the guy and I don't want you to get hurt," Marcy finally blurted out as the two headed back towards the elevator.

Amanda stopped dead in her tracks, turning to her friend with the most concentrating look across her face. "Is it... uh, really that obvious?" she asked quietly after a minute.

"Yes," answered Marcy with confidence.

"Oh." Amanda didn't have much of a response to that, so she returned her attention back to the end of the hall and headed on her way, Marcy following beside her.

Amanda knew how she felt, but she had no idea that it was so obvious everyone else did, as well. So did that mean that JC knew, too, and how come she felt a little embarrassed about that? This was all so new to her. Amanda was clueless.

"It's alright," Marcy told her reassuringly after they'd spent too long of a quiet moment in the elevator. "I'm pretty sure he's nuts about you, too."

After too long of a work day, Amanda was finally able to retreat to the comfort of her apartment and watch her new videos. She was more than a little excited just to see his face, even if it was only on TV.

Of course, within the first minute of watching the old video she was fighting back laughter. Mainly because the guys looked so incredibly different. Especially Justin with his bleached blond hair and Chris with those weird looking braids. What the heck had he been thinking?

When JC's call came through right in the middle of "For The Girl Who Eats Everything", Amanda had a really hard time holding back her amusement. Not just because he was a complete goof, but because she was completely smitten by the whole thing.

"What are you doin'?" he asked curiously after her giggly hello.

"Funny you should ask," Amanda remarked with a chuckle, "Terra sent me a little care package today."

"Okay."

"You never told me you played the piano," Amanda remarked while pausing the video, his face staring at her through the TV.

"Oh yeah, I can play," he answered cheerfully, "but not as good as you, though."

"Right." Amanda didn't believe that one for a second. "But really, you'll have to play for me sometime. Maybe, for the girl who eats everything?" she asked with a giggle.

She could practically hear him choking on his laughter. "So, what exactly did your cousin send you?" he asked curiously after a minute.

"Oh, just all your videos and CD's," she answered casually.

"Because you didn't have them already."

"Yes, because I didn't have them already, and I have to say, this is very entertaining." Amanda teased.

"That's really old, you know."

"I kinda figured that."

"We were just a little dorky," he remarked.

"But very cute," Amanda added. If only he could see the big grin on her face through the telephone.

"That was definitely the look we were going for," he remarked sarcastically. "Cute."

"Especially you," Amanda added, ignoring his little comment.

She was beginning to realize just how much she missed him as she spoke. His voice was nice and his picture may have been staring her in the face, but neither came close to having him there beside her. She'd figured time would make it easier but it seemed it was just making it worse. She missed him. A lot.

"Was I cute?" he questioned her. Amanda could just imagine the smile across his perfectly kissable lips. What she wouldn't give to have them in front of her at that very moment.

"Yeah, you were."

"I'm not now?"

"Nope," she answered, pausing for a brief moment before continuing. "I can think of much better descriptive words for you now."

"Oh, like what?" he asked with intrigue.

"Um, I can't tell you."

"Why?" he asked, his voice turning up a notch as he spoke.

"Because, that way I can torture you the way you're torturing me."

"How am I torturing you?" he asked.

"'Cause you act all cute in these videos and it makes me miss you even more," she admitted, trying her best not to whine as she spoke.

"You don't have to watch them."

"I know, but it wasn't so bad until you called," she explained.

"Oh, so did you want me to let you go?"

"No!" she answered a little too desperately. "No, I don't want you to let me go," she repeated, this time much more calmly.

JC chuckled softly. "Good, because I wasn't going to let you go anyway."

Amanda took in a deep breath, closed her eyes and let her head fall against the back of the sofa. "JC," she sighed.

"What sweetheart?" he asked sincerely.

"I never realized it was possible to miss someone so much."

"If it makes you feel any better, I miss you a lot, too."

"It's not gonna get any easier, is it?" she asked with little hope.

"Probably not," he answered truthfully. "Unfortunately, my life is pretty crazy . Not exactly the ideal circumstances for a relationship. You think you can handle it?"

Could she handle it? She'd have to. "I'm sure as hell gonna try." Because she already loved him too much to let him go.

OVER THE NEXT few days Amanda got settled back into her routine at the hotel, but as she found herself submerged in her once normal duties, she realized how boring it all was.

The days were long and for once she began to feel a little overwhelmed by it all. Not that the work was any more difficult than it had been before. In fact, that couldn't have been more far from the truth. It just wasn't fulfilling to her anymore. She was tired of eating, sleeping and breathing that hotel.

Maybe JC had been right. This wasn't how she wanted to spend the rest of her life. Giving up the hotel didn't mean giving up her mother. Her mom would've wanted Amanda to move on, not confine herself to a lifestyle that made her unhappy. Now she'd just have to figure out what it was that would make her happy.

The night before JC's arrival, Amanda was so restless that she couldn't sit still. It was almost midnight when she decided to get dressed and do the one thing that had always brought her peace of mind. Go down to the bar and play the piano.

WHEN JC PULLED UP to the front of the hotel just after one in the morning, he was so anxious he could hardly sit still. The hotel was practically deserted at such an hour, which was just fine by him.

Amanda didn't have a clue he'd be there already. He'd managed to get an early flight out so he could surprise her. He'd missed her a whole lot more than he'd expected and, frankly, his own feelings had surprised him just a little.

He loved Amanda and he was ready to tell her. He couldn't hold it in any longer.

His head was in a cloud as he headed straight for the elevator and up to her condo. There were so many things on his mind, he wouldn't even know where to begin when he finally got there. He did feel just a tiny bit guilty for barging in on her at such a late hour, but he knew she wouldn't be upset. In fact, he was pretty damn sure that she'd be so happy she'd probably tackle him. At least that was the reaction he was hoping for.

Standing in front of her door, he took in a deep breath and knocked loudly. He could only imagine the thoughts that would run through her head when she realized someone was banging on her door at one in the morning. It would all be worth it when she realized it was him, though. That he was sure of.

After a minute of no response, he knocked again. He didn't remember her being that heavy of a sleeper. Of course, he had never slept with her in her own bed, either, and that was always a little different than being in a hotel.

With a frustrated sigh, he raised his fist to knock once more when a voice stopped him from the down the hall. "She's not there."

JC turned as the older gentlemen headed his way. From the looks of his uniform, he was some sort of security.

"Oh."

"She's downstairs in the bar," the older man continued. "I can take care of your bag for you if you'd like."

"If you're sure you don't mind," JC remarked. He was still just a little bit confused.

"No, I don't mind at all," the aged man smiled, "I'm Ron, head of security around here. But I've known Amanda since she was about ten years old."

"Nice to meet you, Ron. I'm JC."

"I know who ya are," Ron smiled as he accepted the hand JC had extended towards him. "You remember where the bar is?"

"I think I can find it, yeah."

"Then what are you waiting for? Go on, now."

"Thanks," JC smiled at the man and headed towards the elevator in a hurry. Did he remember where the bar was? Did he ever. That was the first place he'd laid eyes on Amanda. How could he forget?

The elevator didn't seem to travel fast enough. He watched as the numbers in the display got smaller and smaller until finally he was back in the lobby. Slowly he turned down the hall and headed for that quaint little piano bar, his heart pounding inside his chest. He was suddenly nervous for some reason and he wasn't exactly sure why.

Two steps away from the entrance, he could hear her playing. It wasn't anything soft like he had heard before. This melody was much more aggressive. He couldn't quite place the tune, although he knew it was something classical, perhaps Beethoven or Chopin. He wasn't quite sure. One thing he did know, he didn't want her to stop and once she realized he was there, she would. So instead, he waited just outside the door, hidden from her sight, and listened intently as she played.

Amanda didn't play one wrong note or hit one wrong key. She played absolutely beautiful.

Finally the song ended and he slowly moved through the door, stopping briefly for a moment just to stare. The bar was completely empty and except for the lights around her, it was pretty dark. Like a breath of fresh air, he took in her beauty. Amanda stared down at the keys, as if she was trying to decide what she wanted to play next. Her hair pulled back at the nape of her neck, only a few strands framed the sides of her face. The olive green sweater she wore set the perfect background to her golden-brown locks, even in the dim lighting of the club. With that look of gentle concentration across her face, he almost hated to disturb her, but at the same time he couldn't wait another second.

Clearing his throat just loud enough for her to hear, he slowly moved towards her. "You play very well Ms. Ballard. You took lessons, I assume?"

"Yes, for about ten years. It's been awhile though, but thank you." He noticed the flash of excitement in her eyes as she realized it was him, but she quickly shoved it aside to play along.

"I play a little myself," he remarked, only a step or two away from the shiny black baby grand.

"So I've heard," she grinned something terribly sexy, although he figured it wasn't done purposely on her part. Her eyes caught sight of his and a dazzling twinkle of green stared up at him. "So what brings you here at such a late hour, Mr. Chasez?" she asked with a thin smile.

"Actually," he remarked as he leaned both elbows against the smooth surface of the piano top. "I'm meeting someone."

"Oh really?"

"Yes, my girlfriend."

"Oh."

He realized what a difficult time she was having keeping that straight look on her face. All of her features were struggling just to hang on to that little bit of composure. "I was told I could find her here, in the bar," he continued, closing in on her space and reaching to brush a stray strand of hair from her face.

Secretly Amanda was dying inside. First his sudden surprise of just being there, then the sweet little game he had started, now... just his touch had sent her heart racing off the charts. He was incredible in every sense of the word and he made her feel incredible, too. It took everything in her being to keep it together. Really all she wanted to do was attack him because she had missed him so much.

"Maybe." She finally managed to sputter. All the while, a grin crawling from one corner of his mouth to the other. He completely had her under his spell and he knew it, but she didn't mind. "She might be around," Amanda finished.

"She is," he stated confidently as he closed the distance between them and brushed the back of his knuckles softly across her cheek. "She's right here." He said it so quietly she almost didn't hear. If it hadn't been for the touch of his breath across her lips she might not have known he was speaking. But thankfully she had heard him and the words sank right into her heart.

Closing her eyes, she felt the touch of his lips brush against her own, a billion tingly sparks shooting through her body as it was probably the most sensual yet heartfelt kiss she had ever experienced. It was filled with love and he didn't even have to say it, because she already knew. He loved her and she loved him, too, and there was no doubt in her mind that she was supposed to be with him.

Slowly he backed away and brushed his thumb across the center of her swollen lips. "You're early," she began to say, but he stopped her with his finger pressed to her lips.

"Shhh," he said quietly, "I know."

Grabbing her gently by the hand, he pulled her up from the piano bench and straight into his arms.

"Don't say a word," he whispered lightly, the warmth of his breath tickling her neck. "I missed you so much, Amanda. You can't even imagine how much."

She wanted to tell him she did. That she could imagine because she had missed him just as much, but as soon as she got a word out he stopped her.

"Shhh, remember?"

She didn't answer, but figured her silence would be an acceptable response.

"I love you." The words almost didn't register, thankfully he said it again. "I love you, Amanda. In fact, I think I'm pretty much falling completely head over heels in love with you. And I hope to God that you feel the same."

Her heart bursting with love and joy, she tried to respond. "I -"

"No," he said, "not yet."

It took all of her willpower not to chuckle at his effort to keep her quiet. With his hands laced around her back and his lips barely a breath away from her ear, he had complete control and he was using it to the fullest.
"I think I fell in love with you the first day we met. I just didn't know it at the time. I don't know if I believed in such a thing before, but I do now."

"JC?" she attempted to speak and surprisingly this time he let her.

"What sweetheart?"

Amanda pulled back just enough to look into his eyes. His stare was calm and knowing. She wanted to tell him how she was madly in love with him too, but first she had to kiss him. She just had to.

Rising to the tip of her toes, she pressed her mouth to his with ease, tasting his lips and his tongue and realizing that she was so hungry for him at that moment she'd probably never make it up to her condo.

"I love you, too," she said, breaking away from their kiss only long enough to speak. She indulged in him briefly before continuing, "And I wanted to say it first but you beat me to it... brat."

Immediately JC began to laugh, pulling away from their engaging embrace to look her straight in the eye. "Ha, ha," he chuckled and winked devilishly.

"Now... I think we better go upstairs before I throw you down on the piano," she smirked.

"Ooh, that doesn't sound bad. Maybe we should stay here?"
That boyish gleam in his eye made the offer tempting, but the risk of being caught by her own staff was too scary. "Maybe in somebody's else's piano bar, but not in mine," she remarked.

"Wimp," he called her as she grabbed onto his arm and began pulling him toward the exit.

"Yeah, so?"

"Have I mentioned that I have a piano very similar to this one at home?" he asked with playful smile. The two of them moved into the empty hallway and JC pulled her hand off his arm, instead lacing her fingers between his own. "You know, you've never even see where I live Amanda. Don't you think it's time for a visit? How can you be with someone when you don't even know where they live?"

She looked up at him with a smug grin. "Shhh," she sounded assertively.

"You're bossing me around now?" he asked, obviously amused and looking completely irresistible at the same time.

"Yes."

"Good, ‘cause I like it."

But as soon as they stepped into an empty elevator, JC swept his arms around her and lifted her right off her feet. "I love you Amanda Ballard and I'm gonna tell you so much you're gonna get sick of hearing it."

"I doubt that," she giggled as he spun her around. He dropped her back to her feet and she was immediately dizzy, "whoa."

"Dizzy?" he asked with a grin.

"Just a little."

The doors opened and he took her hand before guiding her down the hall. "I have that effect on women," he remarked with a cocky smile.

"You have that effect on ME."

"Do I?" he asked, one eyebrow raised slightly higher than the other.

"Very much so."

"You know," he casually remarked as they strolled down the hall, "I don't even know what kind of car you drive? What kind of car do you drive, Amanda?"

"A Mercedes."

"That figures," he replied. She looked up at him just in time to catch the playful role of his eyes and teasing smile lingering across his lips.

"Yeah, so what do you drive?"

"Depends on what day it is," he answered with a smile.

"That figures."

He chuckled and Amanda instantly realized how happy she was. In a mere ten minutes she had gone from anxious to completely utterly satisfied and it was all thanks to him.

Unlocking her door, she glanced up at him from the corner of her eye and smiled. Something about him standing so close suddenly made her weak in the knees.

"What?" he asked smugly, obviously noticing as she looked him up and down.

"Oh, nothing."

"You love me," he remarked with a swaggering grin. The door opened and she let him inside, shutting it quickly behind him.

She did love him and maybe now she'd be able to get enough of him to last her for a little while because in a few days he'd be gone again.

Huh, she doubted it. She'd never get enough. Maybe the only way she'd ever be satisfied is if she went with him. Amanda knew things wouldn't all be easy, but she didn't care. Suddenly he made it all worth it. Every bit. And she'd do whatever it took just so they could be together.

Whatever. Whenever. Wherever.

Falling for him was the best thing that had ever happened to her, she could only thank God that she realized it in time.

©2001 BrandyRae