The Story of My Life: Rewritten by LadyX
Past Featured StorySummary:

 

After Kyra and JC make up after not speaking for years, he shows up unannounced at her new house in Boston. How do they rewrite their past and move on with their future?

*Sequel to The Story of my Life* 

 


Categories: Completed Het Stories Characters: JC Chasez
Awards: None
Genres: Angst, Drama, General, Humor, Romance
Challenges: None
Series: JC & Kyra Series
Chapters: 16 Completed: Yes Word count: 40869 Read: 6902 Published: Aug 05, 2015 Updated: Aug 03, 2018
Story Notes:

Forever and always I need to praise elle-miranda for being my ever patient and insightful beta.

 Season 9 NF Awards

Nominated:

- Remarkable Multi-Parter

- Intriguing Work in Progress

- Story Spotlight

- Most Anticipated Update

- Impressive Characterization of JC

- Best Kiss:  Kyra & JC's first kiss

- Best Quote

- Most OMG-WTF Moment

- Phenomenal Fiction Overall 

1. It's hot. by LadyX

2. Lamp Post by LadyX

3. Linguine by LadyX

4. Olives and Thunderstorms by LadyX

5. Phone Calls by LadyX

6. What?! by LadyX

7. Blueprint by LadyX

8. Remembering by LadyX

9. Dusty Keys by LadyX

10. Shadows by LadyX

11. Keyboards by LadyX

12. Ryan Gosling by LadyX

13. Thanks(!)giving by LadyX

14. The Long Road by LadyX

15. Christmas Morning by LadyX

16. The End? by LadyX

It's hot. by LadyX
Author's Notes:
Hiya! Hope you enjoy this next part of the Kyra & JC adventure! Thanks again to elle-miranda for being the bestest beta!

Kyra gasps as she opens the small box JC hands her and smiles. “Oh my god, Josh! This is so pretty! Thank you.” She grins as she pulls the golden necklace from the box, examining the small charm hanging from the chain.


“What is that?” her mother asks as she leans forward to look closely at the necklace as well. “Aw, how adorable. That’s really sweet of you Josh.”


“Um...it’s nothing. Just thought you would like it…” JC says quietly, his cheeks reddened by all of the attention he is receiving.


He watches as Kyra leans forward slightly while her mother clips the necklace around her neck and sees her fingers travel down the chain to the small golden fountain pen charm.


To be honest his Mom had basically pressured him into buying something nice for her sixteenth birthday. She’d hammered into him that a girl only turned sweet sixteen once and that she should get something special. So when he’d gone to the mall and walked around somewhat aimlessly for at least twenty minutes, he’d just decided to walk into a jewelry store.


All girls like jewelry right?


When he’d seen that necklace with the fountain pen charm he’d felt as if he’d found the perfect gift. He’d bought it and hid it in his sock drawer until today when he’d been planning on giving it to her after the BBQ they were having in her backyard to celebrate. He’d been hoping to have some privacy with her when she opened it, but as soon as she’d started opening her other gifts, his mother had started pestering him about his own present to her. And when she hadn’t seem to notice the ‘not now’ looks he kept giving her, he’d finally had to relent and go upstairs to his room in order to bring it down.


Now everyone is staring at him and two of her girlfriends are giggling at each other.


Great.


“Thanks Josh. I love it,” she says before pressing her lips to his cheek gently, a gesture that is totally normal to them but now feels a little uncomfortable as it gets accompanied by another round of girly giggles.


“Yeah, good.” He nods as he tries to hide his embarrassment by taking a rather large bite of birthday cake into his mouth.


***



With a huff Kyra sat down on top of one of the many boxes in her dank basement. Gravel crunched under her feet as she shifted and ran her forearm across her forehead.


It was hot.


So. Fucking. Hot.


She’d been writing in the small den off of the kitchen when suddenly the air conditioner she’d installed in the window had shut off. She’d groaned and tried to turn it on and off a few times but nothing had happened.


It was dead.


So she’d decided that she’d go down to the basement and see if the electrical panel revealed anything, which it had. The breaker for what she’d assumed was her office/den had clicked off, so she’d clicked it back on and thankfully had returned to a working AC.


For about 3 minutes.


That time when the AC went out, so had everything else. She'd sworn and huffed all the while she’d gone through her house unplugging and turning anything non-essential off before making her way back downstairs to the electrical panel. When she’d looked at the panel again, the main breaker was switched off and she was unable to click it back on. No matter how hard she pushed and pulled at it, it stayed in its spot and wouldn’t budge.


Fuck.


Though it was slightly cooler there in the basement, the oppressive humidity that made the patched cement walls sweat also made her uncomfortable.


This wasn’t going to be fun. She had only installed two small AC's in the house, one in her office and one in her bedroom. This was where she spent most of her time when at home and she'd figured that if she found the heat to be too much anywhere else, she could just go out to a coffee shop or a store to enjoy the mostly free AC there.


After all summer didn't last that long and she remembered too well shivering in the living room only a few months ago when she'd moved in during the winter months.


Maybe she should also look into some type of insulation...you know to help with the draftiness and the heat...absorbiness...


Or maybe she'd gotten in over her head.


Why the hell had she bought a house this old?


She’d known that old houses usually came with problems but she’d fallen in love with this one. It held so much charm and history in its high peak and large front porch. She’d gasped at the traditional crown mouldings and the exquisite hand carved wooden banisters, but the kicker had been how inspired she’d felt from the moment she’d walked through the stained glass front door.


She’d needed to buy it.


Sure, it needed a little...well, a lot of work, but she was up for it. The price and the location made it hard to beat; what was a little elbow grease and some TLC when she could make it her own? It would probably take months, even years, for it to be complete but eventually it would be a masterpiece. Her masterpiece.


But for now, even though she had tried her hand at many things, she certainly wasn’t an electrician. And as she didn’t necessarily want to have her house burn down, she needed to call one.


She sighed and kicked the cardboard box nearest her in frustration. Her many hurried trips up and down the stairs coupled with her frustration now had her sweating and it was pissing her off.


When she started to stand up to go get her phone, she noticed that one of her boxes’ bottom had ripped open to reveal some of its contents on the floor. After telling herself that it would be a better idea to buy a few of those Rubbermaid plastic tubs so her things could survive the dankness of the basement, she crouched down to clean up the mess.


Her fingers brushed against a few mementos from high school: some old pictures with her girlfriends, a picture from her prom and a braided friendship bracelet. She smiled and opened the top of the box so she could look through its contents. She remembered most of the stuff from when she’d packed it away years ago but hadn’t really gone through it when she’d sold her Mom’s house some months ago. When a reasonable offer had finally come, she’d sort of stuffed new stuff into older already filled boxes without really sorting anything out first.


This became apparent as old pictures gave way to a cookbook her Mom used to really like, a few loose CD’s of burned music, some kitchen towels, and finally a small jewelry box that used to sit on her bedroom dresser. She cracked the cover open and pulled out a used, dog eared picture that had seen better days.


It had been one of her favorite back in the day, showing her and Josh when they were teenagers. Gauging by the hairstyles, she’d been about 15 and he was nearing 17. They were both making ridiculous faces at the camera while clutching paper plates with partially eaten hot dogs on them. It was a silly and light hearted moment caught on camera, but what had made her love the photo so much was how his other arm had been around her shoulders and her arm had been around his waist. It had been innocent when they’d taken the picture but eventually she’d taken it to mean much more.


She sort of half smiled at the picture before she went to put it back. When her fingers brushed against something in the box, she pulled it out to find a delicate golden chain with a fountain pen charm. She’d almost forgotten about the necklace, having taken it off about four years previously, but it was still as beautiful as it was when she’d gotten it on her sixteenth birthday.


*


JC knocked for the second time on an ornately carved door with colorful stained glass. He could see a car parked in the driveway so he’d figured she was home. Maybe he should have called first. And maybe he should have told the cab driver to wait a few minutes before letting him leave.


Fuck it was hot.


Like really hot.


He’d gone straight from his air conditioned hotel room to an air conditioned cab all the way to her house in the back streets of Boston. The dark jeans and dark t shirt he'd chosen to wear while he was in the blissful coolness of his room now really seemed like a really bad decision.


It had been about 8 months since he’d last seen her and they’d sort of broken the ice that night in her hotel room. Since then they’d been emailing back and forth, sometimes calling for a few minutes every once in a while. Things weren't back to where they were before but at least they were talking again...and something was better than nothing.


He’d recently finished up the last leg of the Celebrity tour and she’d finished doing her press thing for her book. When the band had gone on hiatus, he’d gone home to LA for a month and had done absolutely fuck all.


He’d slept ‘til two in the afternoon, went to bed at three am. He’d watched TV and movies, played video games and slept. It was like he'd been trying to catch up on doing nothing and being no one for all the years he’d spent doing everything and being Someone.


When his Mom finally told him that he had to leave his house, he’d agreed and gone to visit them for a few weeks. But then he’d gotten restless. He didn’t really want to stay there and he didn’t really want to go home.


And then Kyra had called him and off the cuff had said something about the next time he’d be in Boston he should let her know and they could hang out or whatever.


So, well...whatever... he was there. She probably wasn’t expecting him to show up at her front door unannounced three days later, but hell, here he was.


He could feel perspiration start to gather at the roots of the hair around his forehead and on his back underneath his shirt. Why had he decided to come to Boston during an unprecedented heat wave? He really hoped she had decent AC in her house.


Just as he finished that thought, the front door swung open and there she stood looking absolutely surprised, clutching a cell phone to her ear. Her hair, which was still a darkish red colour, was piled high on top of her head and she was wearing a tight blue tank top and very short frayed jean shorts.


She looked at him with wide eyes then seemed to remember to motion him in as she kept talking to someone on her cell phone, apparently making an appointment. As he shut the heavy door behind him he noticed that the temperature inside the house wasn’t much different than the one outside and he was basically shutting the door to an oven.


Well, damn.


He watched quietly from his spot in front of the door as she finished her conversation. She seemed exasperated and frustrated with the person on the other end. She motioned for him to wait a moment and he nodded.


Now that he was closer to her, he could tell that she was sweating too. He could see that her forehead was glistening slightly and that a few loose strands of her hair were stuck to her neck. When his eyes drifted down from her neck to the skin exposed above the edge of her tank top he gulped and forced himself to avert his eyes.

Just as he was examining the mouldings around a nearby door with much more interest than they actually deserved, he heard her snap her cell phone closed and he returned his gaze to her.


“Oh my god, Jay-osh!” She stuttered out, and he chuckled at the way she mangled his name.


He’d been able to tell for the last little while that she’d been consciously trying to only call him by his real first name instead of his  nickname. He appreciated this as it was always disconcerting to him when he heard her call him JC; to him it indicated that she was trying to keep him at arm's length when she did it. Anyway, he was grateful she was trying.


“What are you doing here? I mean...um..Hi," she added with a small laugh and seemed like she wanted to lean forward and hug him but then held back. “I’m like, super sweaty right now.”


He chuckled again and grasped his shirt between his fingers and pulled it back and forth as if to fan himself. “I’m getting there,” he said then smiled. “I was in the neighborhood and thought I’d pop in.”


She laughed. “Pretty big neighborhood.”


He shrugged and smirked at her, dismissing it as no big deal. “Everything okay?” he asked, nodding down to the cell phone still clutched in her hand.


She sighed and rolled her eyes. “Yeah. Well, no. My power went out and I apparently can’t get an electrician to show up until either later this evening or tomorrow morning. And it’s fucking hot.”


They both laughed again and she turned, hooking her arm in a beckoning gesture. "Come on in."


He smiled and followed her as she walked through a narrow hallway, the aged wooden floors creaking under their steps. "This is a massive house," he said as they turned a corner and walk into a kitchen. "You live here alone?"


"Yeah. Just me, myself and I. It's kind of a welcomed change after years of living in Res with roommates."


He nodded and she continued. "These old historic houses were built for big multi-generational families. So yeah, it's pretty big but I love it. It also needs a bunch of work,but I'll get there."


She looked back at him over her shoulder as she opened the fridge really quickly and pulled out two bottles before shutting the door again really quickly not wanting to let the cold air out. "For real though, what are you doing here? Not that I'm not happy to see you...I just wasn't expecting you."


"Ah...a girl after my own heart." He grinned as he accepted one of the beer bottles she outstretched to him. He twisted the cap off and took a seat at the small table. "I uh, well honestly I've been going a little stir crazy."


He scratched the back of his neck, took a gulp of his beer and looked down at the table for a moment before looking back up when she took the seat across from him.


"Oh yeah? I would have thought that you'd still be sleeping to catch up on all the sleep you lost in the past few years..." She smirked as she twisted the cap off of her own beer and took a long pull.


As his eyes roamed over her arched neck as she swallowed, he wondered when she'd started drinking beer. When he glanced up to find her eyeing him questioningly, he felt embarrassed and averted his gaze.


He cleared his throat. "I did that for a while, I got tired of it. Then I went to visit Mom and Dad. Stayed there for a while, then we spoke and you mentioned a visit. Thought it would be nice to see you again."


Kyra smiled and his stomach did something weird. He took another sip of his beer, thankful for the cold liquid that moistened his suddenly dry mouth. "So um, what did you say about your power going out?"


She sat up and shrugged. "I have no idea. The main breaker clicked off and I can't get it back on. Had to happen on the hottest day of the year..." She groaned and pressed the sweating beer bottle to her neck and sighed.


He gulped again.


"I...um...maybe I could take a look?" He ventured as he stood up and drained his beer. He needed to distract himself.


She laughed dryly and stood up looking at him skeptically. "You? Joshua 'Fairy Fingers' Chasez?"


His mouth dropped open. "Fairy Fingers? Fuck off." He laughed and started following behind her as she walked down the hall again and opened what he assumed was the basement door.


No harm in trying right?


***















End Notes:
What do you think? Are you happy to have them back? Let me know in a review, I can't wait to hear from you! :D
Lamp Post by LadyX

JC pulls up to Kyra who is walking along on the sidewalk. She doesn't seem to notice him and continues walking with her head down. He watches her for a moment, taking in her jean shorts and the yellow polo shirt that indicates to him that she is probably walking home from work. Since it is summer, she often takes shifts at the small neighborhood grocery store as a cashier in order to help save some money for college.


"Ky!" He yells as he drives slowly alongside her. When she doesn't react he peeps his horn which this time causes her to startle and look around in surprise.


She tugs ear buds out of her ears and steps up to him as he stops near her. "What'd you do that for?"


"I was trying to get your attention," he answers as he puts his Jeep in park. "Hop in, I'll drive you home."


She smiles and shakes her head. "Nah, I'm good. It's a really nice night and it relaxes me to walk. Thanks though."


She's right; it is a nice summer night. The sun is just setting and the heat of the day is starting to dissipate with the help of a cool, fragrant breeze.


"Just hop in, Ky; I don't like it when you walk alone at night...especially with those ear buds in. It isn't safe."


She scoffs and shakes her head dismissively. "C'mon Josh, I've seen one other car and a stray cat since I left the store. Pretty sure I'm safe...we're not in big, bad Orlando here."


He smirks and squeezes the leather steering wheel in his hand. "Maybe not, but I'd still rather see you home."


She sighs and rolls her eyes. "Fiiiiiine," she says before she stuffs her ear pods into her pocket and swings herself up into his Jeep.


He smiles and watches as she puts on her seatbelt before he changes gears and takes off. They ride through the streets quietly, the cool breeze enhanced by the fact that he'd taken the top off of his Jeep earlier in the day. He turns to look at her and finds her resting back against the seat with her eyes closed, wisps of her hair which have escaped her ponytail whipping around her face.


It has only been a few days since they'd spent a few hours together huddled in the treehouse and he'd told her he was moving to Germany. And though they'd tried to avoid prolonged physical contact for the last little while, holding her in his arms again had been really nice.


"When are you leaving?" She asks, taking him out of his thoughts.


He clears his throat. "Um, tomorrow morning actually."


He sees her take a breath and she says softly, "Will I see you again before you leave for Germany?"


He pulls into his driveway and turns off his Jeep. "Yeah. I'll be back in a couple of weeks for a short visit and then for a day or two during the holidays. I’ll be able to say goodbye to my parents and store some of my stuff before we leave in the new year."


She nods and plays with the hem of her shorts. She says nothing for a few moments before she looks up and their eyes connect. "I'm really going to miss you."


"I know. I'll miss you too,” he says and reaches over to squeeze her hand gently. “But really, it won't be much different than now when I'm in Orlando all the time, or when I was filming MMC."


She shrugs and pulls her hand out of his slowly. "I know...but it feels different this time. You'll be in an entire other country you know?"


He nods and absently picks at something nonexistent on his steering wheel. "You're starting college in the fall, you'll make a bunch of new friends. You won't really have time to think of me."


He smiles hesitantly at her, hoping she will smile back but she doesn't. She speaks quietly. "I'll never be able to stop thinking of you."


He feels something stir in his chest and catches her eye again. He knows he should say something but he has no idea what and before he can figure it out she unclips her seatbelt and hops out of the Jeep thanking him for the ride.


He blinks a few times before also getting out of the Jeep. He walks around it when he sees her standing near the decorative lamp post that separates their two front yards. She seems to be thinking about something.


As he starts walking toward her, she steps forward as if she's going to meet him halfway then she steps back again as if thinking better of it. He narrows his eyes and frowns slightly. "Ky?"


The moment he gets near her she looks up at him quietly. When he's about to ask her if she's alright he gets cut off by her quickly coming closer. Before he knows it she's standing on her tip toes while her left hand frames his face and she's kissing him.


He feels her fingers grasp the front of his shirt only for moment before she pulls away and she's already making her way toward her house and shutting the front door behind her, leaving him standing there alone with only the glow of the lamp post to keep him company.


***


JC ran the tip of his fingers along an almost completely faded handwritten label indicating the breaker for 'outdr lampst'. He gnawed at his bottom lip as he looked along the other labels indicating other areas of the house. The only breaker flicked off was the large main one. He tried to flick it back twice but wasn't able to. So, he put his hands on his hips and looked at the panel for another minute so that he didn't look completely incompetent, but who was he kidding.


***


"So, um...yeah. It doesn't work," he finally said and she chuckled from her perch on one of the boxes and rolled her eyes.

She’d known he would have no idea what he was doing, but she still knew him well enough to know that he had to be the one to say he couldn’t do something.  Besides, at this moment she didn't mind watching him from the back without him seeing.


He'd always been on the skinny side ever since they'd been kids but he'd definitely filled out in the last couple of years. His waist and hips were still narrow but his shoulders and arms had become insanely defined. Where he used to be gangly and honestly sort of awkward he’d become strong and fit.


She wondered if being on stage and running around while singing did that or he also found the time to go to the gym.


Now she could see between his shoulder blades where his dark shirt had become damp and it had darkened the fabric. Her eyes followed up to the collar where his long curly hair now rested. The look really suited him and to be honest it sort of made her stomach flutter in strange ways it hadn’t in a while.


She’d never been a fan of the caesar cut he’d gotten in the early years of the group, favoring his quintessential nineties hair during his years in MMC. She remembered running her fingers through the thick locks while they'd laid on the grass in the yard, or on the couch watching a movie.


It was a little known fact how much he'd enjoyed his scalp rubbed and his hair stroked. She wondered if he still did.


She’d be lying if she said that her fingers weren’t itching to run through his curly mane now.


This surprised her as up until somewhat recently, she’d still been ambivalent about her feelings for him.


It had been hard for her to peel off the thick coating she’d had to put on her heart after they’d had their fall out, probably because it had been so hard to put there in the first place.


When it came to him she always seemed to have no willpower. It had been easy to avoid her feelings for him when they weren't speaking or seeing each other but as soon as he'd laid his eyes on her all those months ago she'd known she'd break.


He'd said all of the right things in his emails and phone calls while they'd been apart and had sort of gotten to know each other again. Happily she'd been able to tell that he'd seemed to have humbled himself once more and sounded more like the boy, now man, she'd known and loved since she was five years old.


His eyes, his arms, his hands and his lips were so entwined with all of her memories, the good and the bad, that she never could resist being taken in by him. Whether it was a somewhat platonic friendship or a lot more, it was like she needed him in her life for it to feel complete.


She realized that this probably wasn't healthy, but it was her reality. It was like she had imprinted on him early in life and even though she tried to resist, she would always find her way back to him.


She'd realized this most profoundly when she'd edited her book and had suddenly realized how much the main love interest had resembled the Josh she'd grown up with. She hadn't meant for it to happen but apparently subconsciously she hadn't been able to completely shut herself off to him even when she tried.


And then she'd realized how she'd fallen in love with him all over again with every word she'd written and every page she'd finished, because with him, there would never truly be a way for her to turn the page and close the book.


Yes, she loved him but she wasn't sure it was the right kind of love. She didn't think she could actually be with him, so it was better to love him quietly from afar for everything he was but also for everything he could never be.


Only time would tell.


"-this for?" She looked up, suddenly aware that he was talking to her. He was no longer standing near the electrical box but nearer to her, pointing at a large stack of boxes obviously containing flooring tiles.


She stood up and nodded over to the boxes. "Some flooring tiles for when I redo the kitchen and bathrooms. I got them dirt cheap at this little family owned hardware store that was forced to close because of the big box stores. They gave me a really good deal so I bought them out."


He nodded and raised his eyebrows. "You know how to do that? Tiling I mean?"


She shrugged and blushed a little. "Hopefully. I read a few books and took a class at one of the home renovation stores."


He nodded and seemed slightly impressed. "That's cool. But why not get a contractor?"


She shrugged again and shook her head. "Too expensive. I'm just doing things slowly. I find stuff in yard sales and through good deals. I did my bedroom and my office, next I'm hoping to do the dining room. I do it when I have time to myself or when I have writer's block you know? Gets my mind on something else for a while and that usually helps."


He nodded and she watched as he crouched down and absently ran his fingertips along the grain of one of the textured tiles. He seemed to be thinking about something, so she continued. "So um yeah, the house needs a lot of work but I have this unexplainable love for it. So I'll stick it out until it's what I want."


He looked up and their eyes connected, and while she used to prize herself on almost always being able to know what he was thinking with a single glance, today she just couldn't seem to read him.


A shiver ran through her and she looked away. The silence was uncomfortable and she didn't know why. Thankfully her cellphone rang, breaking the silence and causing them both to jump slightly.


She giggled and pressed her palm to her heart as she rolled her eyes at him. She flipped open her phone and was happy to hear that an electrician was actually on his way.


She jumped up, told JC and they both made their way back upstairs. As they stepped back onto the main level and he shut the basement door behind him he said, "Once everything is done here, maybe we could go out? My hotel has a really good restaurant and a pool. Also may I add that there is glorious AC throughout?"


She laughed and looked back at him. "Haven't you lived in Florida for like half of your life?"


“Yeah, but everyone has AC everywhere. I have to wear a fuckin’ sweater inside most places half the time.” He grinned as she rolled her eyes and turned as the doorbell rang. “So what do you say?”


“I say that I’d willingly eat the asshole of bear to have a dip in a cold pool right now.”


***





End Notes:
So I've had a lot of hits on the first chapter but barely any reviews. I really hope that you are happy to see these two again and that you're enjoying it so far. I'd love some feedback from you!
Linguine by LadyX
Author's Notes:

Thank you for all of the hits and to ones that left reviews anonymously, thanks! 

And as always, elle-miranda rox my sox as my beta. 

Kyra takes a deep breath and inhales the familiar scent of his hair and skin. She's never really been able to experience it this intimately before so now she is luxuriously enjoying the moment.


Her lips are against the side of his neck and she is slowly kissing it while the tip of her nose gently nuzzles his skin. She can feel his lips on her neck as well and for a moment she becomes lost as she feels the tip of his tongue slowly tease her skin; the combination of the wetness he leaves behind and his slow breathing makes her shiver. Her fingers grasp onto his very short hair and she angles her neck back as she moans.


"Are you sure you want to do this?" He questions breathily as his teeth now nip gently at her earlobe.


She nods and screams, "Yes," but it only comes out as a whisper.


He kisses her deeply and she is lost again. Lost in the feeling of his lips against hers, the smooth, confident strokes of his tongue and the heavy weight of his body pressed down onto hers. She wants to yell for him to hurry and take the rest of their clothes off but now he's slowly grinding his hips against hers and she forgets about everything else but how good that feels.


"I'll be gentle, I promise..."


Kyra blinked a few times as JC nudged her with a folded, fluffy white towel. "Want one?" He questioned before handing it to her and unfolding his own towel to start  roughly drying his dripping hair. She watched as his biceps flexed in the process before he quickly ran the towel over the rest of his body. Frankly, she was openly staring at his body and her mouth was probably hanging open.


"So, can I sit down or you aren't done taking inventory of my abs yet?" He smirked and she wanted to smack him but she laughed instead.


"All present and accounted for, Sir." She grinned and started towelling herself off as he laid down on one of the padded lounge chairs. She sponged most of the water from her hair and let it hang loose and damp on her bare shoulders.


She'd actually been looking for a towel when she'd caught sight of him pulling himself out of the crystal clear pool, water dripping off every inch of skin and hair. It was like a scene straight out of a movie, possibly a pornographic one, and she'd been unable to keep her thoughts from wandering.


She licked some water droplets off of her lips and took a seat in the lounge chair next to him.


"So you're telling me that you're the only one with access to this pool?"


He chuckled. "Just me and whoever is renting the three other suites. It's sort of a perk for renting those rooms that you have access to a private rooftop patio and pool. You need a special key to unlock the elevator so it comes up here."


"I sometimes forget how very VIP you are." She yawned and he didn't reply; he only looked at her for a moment through his aviators then smiled.


She'd been amazed when they'd pulled up to the hotel and seen how fancy it was. She'd felt incredibly embarrassed to hand over the keys of her old beater to a man wearing a suit and white gloves.


The embarrassment had only gotten worse when she'd looked in her pockets for a tip but had only found a pack of gum and a hair tie. Thankfully the valet hadn't seemed to notice as JC had stepped up and smoothly pulled out a folded bill from his pocket and placed it in the man's palm.


She'd scolded herself for not putting her wallet in her pocket instead of in the catacombs of the bag slung over her shoulder. It wasn't like she was broke or poor, she was just very smart about where and when she spent her money. Compared to him though, she was probably a pauper.


She'd been saving her money for college ever since she'd been a young girl. Her Mom had been a hard worker and had done everything in her power to save as much money as possible so that their combined savings would end up covering any costs she'd incur.


When her Mom had passed, she'd left Kyra with enough savings and assets to cover college, buy an old car as well as put a very healthy down payment on her new house.


"I saw that your book is doing well," he said quietly with his arms over his head as he seemed to be enjoying the sun.


It was distracting to have him laying there shirtless with wet swim trunks plastered to his thighs leaving very little to the imagination.


She blinked a few times again behind her sunglasses and decided to lay back in her chair. She needed to find something else to look at.


"Um, yeah. I'm not Sandra Brown or Catherine Coulter but it's doing relatively well. They've actually given me an advance on the other two books since this one is bringing in money."


"Good for you, Ky. I knew you'd do well. I'm really proud of you."


She smiled and blushed as she nervously played with the edge of her towel. "So um, have you read it?"


She turned her face toward him to see him smirking, his eyes still hidden behind his sunglasses, his face not turned toward her. "Mmhmm."


She panicked a little and started wondering if he'd recognized himself in Scott, her main male character. After all, she'd foolishly used his middle name.


"I never knew you wrote erotic novels..." He chuckled then laughed when she swung her towel at his face.


"It's not an erotic novel! It's a romantic suspense and well...they do have some...salty moments but that's not the core of the story," she huffed but felt a little better. She should have known that he would have completely missed it and focused only on the sexy stuff.


"I especially liked the scene where they're at one of his construction sites and they baptise a set of scaffolding..."


She groaned and ran a hand over her face. "I'm going for another dip," she sighed as she stood up quickly and headed over to the pool.


Just as she was about to dive in she heard him call out to her, "Yeah, I needed some cold water after that scene too!"


***

"Are you serious?" She gasped as they stepped out of the elevator directly into the large foyer of his hotel room. He laughed softly as he watched her slowly look around the penthouse suite, her flip flops slapping on the tiled entrance and kitchen area.


Earlier when they'd gotten to the hotel he'd brought her up to the roof directly since she'd put her bathing suit on under her clothes before leaving her house. He'd then come down to his room to change and met with her again at the pool.


"Nice huh?" He said as he unwrapped the wet towel from around his waist, threw it over his shoulder and slipped off his own flip flops onto the small rug near the door.


"Really nice. This must be costing you an arm, a leg and three fingers."


He laughed again and walked over to the kitchen area where he opened the fridge and pulled out two very cold bottles of water. He set one on the granite countertop and twisted the cap off of the other. After taking a long gulp of the frigid water he replied, "Actually it isn't costing me anything."


She scoffed as she walked forward and dropped the bag that was over her shoulder onto the floor before grabbing the other bottle of water. "What do you mean?" She asked before opening the bottle and taking a long sip as well.


He shrugged self consciously. "I reserved a regular room. When I showed up to check in, they tell me they've upgraded me to the penthouse suite and that they've comped it for me. I just have to make sure that I tell 'all my friends' how great of a stay I've had here."


"So you can stay here for as long as you like and it doesn't cost you a thing?" She eyed him quizzically and for some reason he sort of felt embarrassed all of a sudden.


He nodded and scratched his chest uncomfortably over the damp fabric of the shirt he'd thrown on before coming down to the room. "Pretty much...at least until someone rents it outright or when someone more important than me shows up."


She giggled and he smiled. "That's craziness."


"That's the thing with being...famous. Once you can afford to buy everything you ever wanted and do everything you wanted to do, no one wants to take your money. They all want you to have everything for free so they can say you're wearing their stuff or eating their food."


He watched her as she shook her head and took another sip from her water bottle. He liked the way her hair was drying in a slight wave that crested her collarbone. He’d frankly enjoyed it earlier when she’d been checking him out. He knew his body had changed somewhat drastically since they’d last been together and it had made him feel good to think she may be turned on by him again. He’d certainly gotten an eyeful when she’d removed the sundress she’d been wearing over her dark green bikini. He didn’t remember ever having seen her in a bikini before; when they were growing up she’d always either work a one piece or one of those two piece things where the top goes down to the waist.


Thank god his sunglasses were mirrored and he’d been apparently more skilled than her at covering the fact that he’d been checking her out. Especially when he’d thought he’d seen the hint of a tattoo peeking out from the top of her bikini bottom.


Now she’d put the sundress back on but her hair was still damp and her skin was slightly reddened by the recent exposure to the sun. He kind of wished she’d take the sun dress off again.


“So, do you want to shower first?” She asked while bending down to unzip her bag and rummage through its contents.


“Actually, there are two bathrooms.” He pointed to the left, then the right where two sets of french doors were closing off rooms beyond them. “My stuff is already in that one, go ahead and use the other,” he said indicating the one on the right.


She nodded and picked up her bag before she headed off toward the spare room. When she shut the french doors behind herself he couldn’t help but wonder if she still used the sweet smelling satsuma body wash whose smell had been imprinted in his mind all those years ago.

***

Kyra looked at JC over the top of her restaurant menu. He looked really handsome wearing a white collared dress shirt over a pair of dark blue jeans. He’d rolled the sleeves up on his forearms and again, it was difficult for her to not keep staring at the prominent veins snaking up his muscled forearm.


This restaurant was really fancy and she was happy that she’d brought a pretty summer dress to wear. It was a simple light blue maxi dress with a pretty pattern which looked great with the white flip flops she was already wearing. She’d pulled her hair up in a stylish bun and only applied a little makeup on her eyes and some gloss on her lips. After a spritz of her perfume, she’d gone back into the living area of the hotel room to find he’d just finished getting ready as well.


All he’d had to do was call down to the restaurant and ask for a table that was more on the secluded side and he’d been accommodated immediately. Now, as they sat in the high backed booth both looking at their menus all she could think about was how good he smelled and how close his knees were to hers under the small table.


“Did you decide on what you would like?” The voice of their waiter returning brought her back to reality.She looked up over her menu to find JC motioning to her, indicating he wanted her to order first.


Damn, she should have been paying attention.


She quickly glanced over the menu and picked the first thing she recognized. The waiter smiled at her and nodded before looking over at JC who ordered some kind of veal dish she didn’t recognize. When he inquired about what the house wine was, he looked over at her inquiringly and she nodded indicating that she was fine with the choice.


“So, when did you start drinking beer? Or tequila for that matter?” He asked as the waiter quietly moved away from their table.


She laughed softly and shrugged. “College, I guess. I rarely drink any hard liquor.” When he smirked at her she continued, “That...was a hard night.” She answered addressing the night he’d had to bring her back to her room when she’d had a little too much to drink in the hotel bar.


He laughed softly and scratched his cheek. “It wasn’t that bad.”


She lifted her eyebrows. “Not that bad? I’m pretty sure I puked on you.”


He shook his head. “Not on me...thankfully in the toilet.”


She winced and shook her head. “Still that wasn’t cool, I feel bad.”


He shrugged and leaned back as the waiter returned with their bottle of wine and he served them their first glass before placing the bottle on the table and moving away again.


“It wasn’t the first time I’ve seen you be sick, plus I think we’re pretty much even now.”


It took her a moment to remember what he was referring to and then she laughed into her wine glass. “Oh my god. How did I forget about the night of the lebanese food?”


His cheeks reddened even in the dim lighting of the restaurant as he took a sip from his own glass before he chuckled too. “If you don’t call that a bonding experience...nothing is.”


She shook her head, remembering the night they’d gone on a road trip and he’d absolutely insisted on trying lebanese food at this little hole in the wall restaurant. For some reason he’d gotten food poisoning from it and while she’d been in the shower of the hotel room’s bathroom, he’d burst in the door apologizing over and over again as he’d gotten sick over and over again into the nearby toilet.


Though at the time he’d been really sick, when he’d gotten better all they could do was laugh at the sounds and smells that really shouldn’t ever have to be shared between two people.


“Stop thinking about it!” He said comically and leaned back against the padding of the booth as he took another sip of wine.


She couldn’t help it, but she kept giggling as they enjoyed their wine and made small talk until their meal came. As she tucked into her seafood linguine, which was really rather delicious, she asked, “So, how long are you staying in Boston?”


He chewed the bite of veal he had in his mouth and swallowed before answering. “I’m not sure. Another few days I assume. If you’ll have me around of course.”


She smiled widely and nodded. “Of course. I’m having a good time. I have to work a few shifts at the bookstore in the next few days, but I wouldn’t mind hanging out again.”


When he smiled at her answer and it reached his eyes, crinkling them at the corners she felt something stir in her stomach again and she knew that it definitely wasn’t the linguine.


***

End Notes:
Yummy?
Olives and Thunderstorms by LadyX
Author's Notes:
Want more? Here's more!

Kyra stepped out of the elevator and into JC's hotel room. He'd given her a key earlier that morning when he'd come by her house to meet with both the electrician from the day before as well as a heating and cooling technician she had called.


Yesterday when the electrician had come over to turn the power back on in the house, he'd warned her that he would be able to turn it back on but if she was ever planning on adding more appliances to the home she should consider updating her electrical. The house still had old wiring and the box was already overloaded as it was, hence the power outage that day.


He'd suggested she not turn on her AC's again until things were updated as to not have this happen again. He'd also mentioned that if she'd ever considered updating the ventilation system to central air and heating, that this would be the time to do everything at once so that it would be done correctly.


At dinner the night before JC had mentioned having worked with many contractors and designers after he'd bought his houses in both Florida and LA. Since Kyra didn't have any experience herself she asked if he wouldn't mind coming over to meet them with her.


He'd been happy she'd asked and she'd been even happier when he'd asked all of the questions she never would have thought of asking regarding things like licences, permits and contingency funds.


The work was set to begin in about a week and she was glad, although her savings would take a hit. She had more than enough funds to cover the costs, but she'd just been hoping it could have waited a little longer.  


Though after tossing and turning all night in a sweaty mess, she'd decided it would be more than worth it. She'd barely slept a wink and she was feeling it today. And although JC had offered her the second room in his suite more than once, she'd declined. She didn't feel comfortable with the idea of being so close to him right now.


Before parting ways after dinner, they'd decided that she would come hang out with him tonight after work before she went back to her house. She'd suggested picking up a pizza and a couple of movies and he'd agreed. So here she was dropping the hot pizza box onto the granite kitchen counter. When she didn't see him anywhere, she walked over to his side of the suite and carefully peeked through the crack in the door.


She didn't see him but heard the shower running in the bathroom. The door was cracked open as well and she called out, "J? I'm here."


He replied that he'd be right out and she practically ran out of the room before the pungent smell of his bodywash and the idea of him being naked in there made her do something stupid.


Back in the kitchen she busied herself by taking two plates from the cupboard and setting them up on the counter before taking a seat on one of the bar stools and opening the pizza.


She groaned and rolled her eyes. She'd made sure to ask for olives only on half but of course they'd messed up and the olives were covering the entire thing.


She pulled a hot slice from the box and placed it onto a plate. She could hear JC moving around in his bedroom and tried really hard not to imagine him getting dressed. Or undressed for that matter.


She dished out another slice onto another plate and then absently started picking the pieces of olives off of his piece, stuffing them into her mouth while she flipped through a Time magazine that had been on the counter.


"Smells awesome. You didn't have to--" He stopped mid sentence as he took a seat on the bar stool in front of her. She heard him chuckle and she looked up to see him looking at her with an amused look on his face.


"Wha? You wike owives now?" She asked rather innocently with her mouth full of the offending fruit, swallowing thickly as he shook his head and chuckled again. "What then?"


He grinned and shrugged his shoulders before he pulled his olive free slice toward him. "That was fast, I wasn't expecting you for another half hour or so." He took a large bite of his pizza and chewed quietly.


She watched him, taking in his freshly washed hair and the simple tshirt and sweats he was wearing. She liked that he knew he could be himself when she was around...and the fact that he didn't even realise how sexy he really was.


She took a bite as well and swallowed."The store wasn't busy and Pam was done with the end of month bookkeeping, so she offered to let me out earlier since I'd mentioned I had plans." She took another bite and closed her eyes for a moment, enjoying the cheesy goodness.


"You like working there?" He asked as he wiped his mouth with a napkin and reached for another piece. Apparently he could still inhale a pizza as fast as he could when he was fourteen.


She nodded and smirked a little as piece after piece of olive started hitting her plate as he flicked them off his slice. "Yeah. It's quiet and comfortable. There aren't too many privately owned bookstores in the city left, what with all of the big corporate ones now. I enjoy the family feel to it and they're really supportive of my writing and are really flexible on my scheduling so I couldn't ask for better."


She picked at a few olives and asked, "So what's next for you? Are you going back into the studio soon?"


She watched as he chewed slowly and took his time wiping his mouth and then his fingers before answering. "I'm not sure. We're supposed to...at least that's what we put out officially."


She raised an eyebrow. "But it's not the truth? Did you guys break up or something?"


He shook his head. "No, nothing like that. We will go back into the studio, I just don't know when that'll be. We all need a bit of a break and everyone is doing something different for a little while, you know?"


She nodded and ripped a piece of crust off. "So what are you doing that's different?"


He seemed to hesitate for a moment and then he spoke quietly. "I'm not sure honestly."


She nodded and started chewing on the doughy crust, not wanting to push the issue.


She thought he was done talking but then he continued. "About a year ago some producers and record execs met with me in confidence to offer me a solo deal."


She wasn't sure he'd continue so she prompted him. "And you didn't take it."


He shook his head and absently started folding and unfolding his paper napkin. "Nah man. My head was still really with the group you know? They're my brothers and I didn't want to break that up and make them feel as if I was leaving them behind...and that I thought I was better than them."


He stood up and she watched as he went around the counter toward the fridge where he pulled out two bottles of beer. He set one in front of her then made his way back around the counter as he untwisted the cap.


"I never told the other guys, figured that I didn't want to bring that elephant into the room you know?" He took a sip and set the bottle in front of him. "Anyway, they told me that the offer would still stand when I was ready."


She untwisted her cap off and took a sip. "And are you ready now?"


He shrugged, picking at the label on his bottle. "I don't know. Everyone is doing something different...Justin is going solo. So maybe....I sort of feel as if it wouldn't be that bad of a betrayal if he's doing it too."


She took another slice from the box but just picked at it on her plate. "I think you'd do really great."


He finally looked up and he almost smiled. "You think so?"


She nodded. "Yeah, I do. You were born to do this. You belong on a stage, Josh. You're so...alive when you're performing. Music just runs through you and I just can't imagine a world where your beautiful voice isn't being used to its full potential."


This time he did smile and she couldn't  help but smile back at him. She could tell that he was still feeling conflicted but knowing him he'd be doing a lot more ruminating about it for the next little while.


Trying to cut the tension she said, "Plus if you're going to be drinking probably 15$ bottles of beer from five star hotel mini fridges, you should probably do something that'll keep the money rolling in."


***


JC's eyes opened quickly as he is startled from sleep. He wondered what woke him when all of a sudden, a bright streak of lightning flashed in the sky causing the room to light up for a few seconds before returning to the darkness. He could hear rain loudly pelting the windows as his eyes roamed around the room to see that the TV was still on but the screen was blank.


A crash of thunder resounded and he looked down to Kyra who had fallen asleep against him, the side of her head cradled in his lap.


They'd been watching a movie when suddenly she'd gotten quiet and eventually fallen asleep, her eyes fluttering closed after she had seemed to be fighting it.


It hadn't taken long for her to seemingly by instinct move closer to him until she'd eventually ended up in that position. He didn't mind in the least, even if his left leg was sort of starting to fall asleep. He didn't want to move in case it would wake her.


He looked down at the side of her face he could see and smiled. She was sleeping peacefully and that actually surprised him. When they'd been growing up she'd always had an irrational fear of thunderstorms and would always get really freaked out by them. Of course he'd always teased her about it but he'd secretly always enjoyed the way she would hang onto him as if he would be able to protect her from the noise of the thunder and the flashes of lightning.


It warmed his heart right now that she still, at least subconsciously, felt safe enough to let herself become this vulnerable near him.


He'd been so terrified that he had lost her for good when they'd stopped speaking a few years ago. Losing her had sort of jarred him back to reality somewhat and though he had always prided himself on saying he'd stayed pretty down to earth, he'd veered off course at some point.


He hadn't been able to get her out of his head ever since he'd seen her that night arguing with his bodyguards. Even when he'd been with Bobbie again, which had been inevitable, he'd been unable to turn off the comparisons to Kyra.


Hell, he'd even gotten angry at Bobbie one evening when she ordered the wrong food for him. Like seriously pissed.He'd snapped at her that she should have been able to know by now what he liked and didn't like. And it had sort of hit him suddenly that she didn't seem to really know him at all.


Sure she knew how to make him say yes to almost anything. And she knew how to...well, take care of him in the bedroom but suddenly he'd needed more.


Someone who knew that he liked brown sugar on his french toast but not on his oatmeal. That his coffee had to be extra hot at all times or he lost interest in it. That he couldn't watch a movie without popcorn--extra salt, hold the butter and that his favorite place in the world was still his bed at his parent's house in Bowie.


When he'd watched Kyra innocently remove the olives from his pizza tonight, all of that had sort of hit home again. Then when she'd pulled out two movies, a bag of plain popcorn and a salt shaker later on, all he could do was grin.


It was strange. He'd been with some truly beautiful women; singers, dancers, models and he'd been happy. But stand Kyra in sweat pants, a ponytail and no makeup next to those women and they didn't have a chance.


There was just something. Something he couldn't figure out about how he always went back to her. How he could never resist her even when he knew it would end in heartache either on his part ot hers.


He'd had girlfriends and she'd had boyfriends, but there always was this sort of 'what if' feeling between them. It always seemed like each one of them had wanted to explore that, but always at different times: either he was leaving or she was leaving, he was single but she wasn't single. They just never really got to give it a serious try.


But now that he was here with her and possibly he had the chance to win her back, he didn't want to mess that up. It was obvious that he was still very attracted to her but he realised that if the only thing he ever got from her was a semblance of their past relationship, he'd be able to live with that. Possibly.


Probably not.


But he would try. Even though he wasn't sure if she'd be willing to try. He could tell that she was still attracted to him, but that wasn't the same thing as being in love with him. Or at least open to falling in love with him. Maybe she wouldn't be able to do that again since he'd royally messed it up the last time.


Maybe he needed to let her know what he was thinking. Make it clear to her that he was still attracted to her and wanted to see if they could be more than friends. Or was it too soon? It was only a matter of time before--


Suddenly another loud crash of thunder broke the silence and he startled causing her to wake up with a gasp. She looked around apparently confused until he patted her hip gently. "It's okay Honey, just some thunder. You're here with me."


She sat up, turned toward him and for some reason she watched him quietly. Her eyes searched his and like two magnets unable to keep from pulling closer he leaned forward. He parted his lips slightly and took a breath.


Maybe this was going to work. Maybe she knew what he was feeling. Maybe they could--


Another crash of thunder and the moment was broken. She was pulling away and blinked a few times as if she was waking from a trance. Then she was shaking her head and apologizing while getting up and grabbing her things hurriedly. And then he was apologizing too and trying to keep her from leaving in the storm but she was saying something about a leaking roof and open windows...


And then she was gone.


***





End Notes:
Do you like olives? ;)
Phone Calls by LadyX
Author's Notes:
Thanks again, elle-miranda my favourite cheerleader and editor.

Kyra bites her lip and plays with the hem of her short sundress uncomfortably as he pulls his car into her driveway.


She's trying to figure out a way that she can grab her purse and high-tail it out of the car before he asks her out again without coming off like a massive bitch.


Yeah, he is relatively nice and handsome, but he knows it and he often crosses the fine line between confidence and cockiness, which completely turns her off.


After all she'd only accepted his invitation after several requests from him. He'd started getting annoying so she'd figured that if she just went out with him once, it would keep him from bugging her again. And then, if you add the fact that she is leaving in little more than a week for college, she'd figured that she wouldn't have to deal with him again anyway.


"I had a nice time,thank you," she says softly as she pushes some hair away from her face. It had been a really warm  summer day and they'd driven with the windows down to help cut some of the humidity. But now as the sky is darkening and the forecast calls for thunderstorms, she looks forward to him leaving even more so she can get changed and settled on the couch before anything starts...especially since her Mom is working overtime tonight and she'd have to face it all alone.


She turns to him and smiles before looking down to unbuckle her seatbelt, when suddenly she feels a warm hand settle on her bare knee. She glances over at the hand and then her eyes follows the arm up to a pair of green eyes that have suddenly moved a lot closer than before.


She opens her mouth to say something but he cuts her off by pressing his lips to hers while that hand immediately tries to travel up under her dress.


She cries out against his lips and places a hand on his chest while the other tries to keep his wandering hand from her thigh.


"Stop it, Dan!" She finally gets to say loudly when she's able to separate their lips by pushing his chin roughly.


"What's wrong Kyra? You said you had a good time," he says as he leans in closer to start kissing her neck.


She struggles against him again and just as her hand wraps around the door handle to escape, a loud voice startles them both.


"Everything okay here?" JC asks, standing beside the car looking through the driver's side window with a very unamused expression on his face.


While Dan gets temporarily distracted by JC's presence she grabs her purse and gets out of the car. "Everything is fine. Dan was just leaving," she says as she slams the passenger side door.


Dan, who now has just realised that she's left the car, turns toward her and says,"Aw, c'mon Baby. We were just getting started." He turns back and winks conspiratorially at JC.


JC narrows his his eyes and leans down closer to Dan's face. "No, I'm pretty sure you were leaving."


Dan looks between JC and Kyra quietly for a moment then scoffs and starts his car while mumbling under his breath. "Fucking tease".


JC raises an eyebrow. "What was that?"


Kyra groans and starts to move away from the car so she can go around and pull JC away. She really doesn't want them to get in a fight, but then Dan looks up as he puts his car in gear and says, "I said everyone knows she only puts out for the rat from Orlando."


JC's chest inflates and she can see his knuckles turn white on the windowsill of the car. Before either man can make a move Kyra pulls the car door open again and leans down to ram her fist straight into Dan's groin causing him to howl in pain. With a satisfied smile Kyra gets back out and slams the door for the second time that night. "Drive safe now, Dan."


Moments later as Dan is speeding down the street with Kyra waving him off, JC walks over to her with a smirk on his lips and says,"So...remind me never to piss you off again."


She looks up at him with a slightly miffed expression. "He deserved it. And anyway, I had everything under control." She crosses her arms over her chest. "You didn't need to come save me, you know."


He scratches his neck and shrugs. "I know...I was just taking out the trash and heard the commotion. I just wanted to make sure you were okay."


He looks up at her with a sheepish smile and even if she'd been really mad at him, she never could  resist that smile. She still gives him a pointed once-over, taking in his black basketball shorts, red sleeveless tshirt and backwards black baseball hat, but then she rolls her eyes and shakes her head before she reaches forward for a hug. When his arms encircle her she squeezes him tightly taking in his familiar, freshly showered smell. "It's okay.When did you get in?"


She feels the pressure of his lips on her hair before he replies. "A few hours ago. When I called earlier your Mom said you'd gone out on a date."


She pulls back from him and chuckles. "Yeah. In hindsight, not the greatest life choice." She shrugs and nods over to the house. "You want to hang out? Or you have something planned?"


He shakes his head. "Nah, nothing planned. Your Mom working tonight?"


She nods as they start walking toward the house and she unlocks the door. She slips off her sandals on the carpet near the door and walks over to the fridge. She pulls out a Snapple Iced Tea then shuts it with her hip as she snaps open her drink and takes a long sip. When she motions the bottle toward him, offering him some, he shakes his head.


"You want to watch a movie or something? I just need to change and I'll be right back."


He shrugs and nods. "Sure. I'll go peruse while you change."


Ten minutes later Kyra walks into the living room to find JC sitting on the floor, his long legs stretched out in front of him and his back resting against the couch.


She places a large pink and green polka dotted plastic bowl full of popcorn next to him on the floor before she grabs a pillow from a basket next to the couch. After she lays down on the couch behind him and shifts so she can reach down into the bowl, she grabs a handful and asks, "So, what's on?"


JC keeps flipping channels while he also reaches into the bowl and stuffs popcorn into his mouth. "Not much...just that lame horror movie we watched a few months ago." He answers around his mouthful before he places the remote on the rug next to him, grabs another handful of popcorn and starts munching quietly.


As the couple on screen starts to get a little intimate, she hears him shift and then he asks quietly, "So is it true that everyone thinks we're...sleeping together?"


She bites her lip and turns so that she is completely on her side behind him. "I...um, yeah. I've heard it before," she answers looking at the back of his head.


He turns on the carpet so that he's now sitting cross legged, facing her. "Does that bother you?"


She watches him for a moment before she shrugs self-consciously. "I don't know...not really, I guess."


He chuckles softly and reaches for a bit of hair that has fallen over her face. He pushes it behind her ear and says, "You guess?"


She shrugs again. "I don't know. It's just that everyone expects me to have gone further than I actually have you know? The guys that ask me out think I've already gone all the way with you, so they assume I will with them. And then there's the other half that won't even ask me out because they think I'm with you."


He nods and stays quiet for several moments. "So you still haven't..." He trails off as if he's embarrassed to finish his question.


She shakes her head. "Nope. I haven't dated anyone after Duke...and you know how that ended." He nods and she adds faking an upbeat tone, "So, no big deal. I'm off to college next week. There'll be plenty of guys there...maybe I'll meet someone or hell, I'll just end up at a party and someone will catch my eye..."


She would have rambled on if it wasn't for the horrified look on his face. She raises a brow at him and he seems to be searching for words when he says, "That. But. Ky. C'mon. You can't."


"I can't what?"


He sighs and shakes his head. "You can't do that...You should have that experience with someone...special." He scrunches his face at his own corny words and chuckles. “It’s just not something you g--”


With swift movement she leans forward,  frames his face with her hands and presses her lips to his, effectively quieting him.She kisses him deeply with no reservations or hesitation, instinctively taking the lead. She feels hesitation on his part at first but just like every other time they've kissed, he quickly responds and kisses her back.


When she finally pulls back, she finds him with his eyes still closed and his lips slightly parted. When he opens his eyes and their eyes connect she says breathily, "I've always had someone special."


With a blush on his cheeks he breaks eye contact and looks down at his hands. "I...you don't want to be with me." Before she can argue he looks up again and continues. "You're just starting out...we both are. You'll meet plenty of new people, have new experiences. I'm not sure where all of this music stuff will take me...I'll be busy. You deserve someone that will be there for you, someone that's around everyday..."


She sighs and nods, she knows he's right but it still feels unfair. "I just...I wish...I wish we could be."


He nods and leans forward again, pressing his lips to her cheek gently. "I know. I do too. Maybe one day."


She nods and places one hand on his cheek again. "Josh?" He raises his brows expectantly. "Maybe we could be together...just for tonight. Please?"


He stares into her eyes for what seems like forever before he nods and leans forward again, kissing her this time.


And then before they know it they've made their way to her bedroom, where their shirts and pants now rest on the floor as they lay on her bed.


Her lips are against the side of his neck and she is slowly kissing it while the tip of her nose gently nuzzles his skin. She can feel his lips on her neck as well and for a moment she becomes lost as she feels the tip of his tongue slowly tease her skin; the combination of the wetness he leaves behind and his slow breathing makes her shiver. Her fingers grasp onto his very short hair and she angles her neck back as she moans.


"Are you sure you want to do this?" He questions breathily as his teeth now nip gently at her earlobe.


She wants to scream, "Yes," but it only comes out as a whisper.


He kisses her deeply and she is lost again. Lost in the feeling of his lips against hers, the smooth, confident strokes of his tongue and the heavy weight of his body pressed down onto hers. She wants to yell for him to hurry and take the rest of their clothes off but now he's slowly grinding his hips against hers and she forgets about everything else but how good that feels.


"I'll be gentle, I promise..."


***


JC's eyes snapped open as he heard his cell phone ring loudly near his head. He hadn't turned the ringer off before he'd finally fallen asleep after tossing and turning most of the night, hoping that Kyra would have returned his calls.


Or his two messages on her answering machine.


Or his six texts.


Okay, maybe he'd overdone it but he needed to talk to her. He wanted to ask her why she'd run out so fast the night before.


He'd thought he'd read her well enough to know she'd wanted to kiss him too...but maybe he'd been mistaken. Now he wasn't sure what to do and he definitely couldn't take her shutting herself off from him again.


Not when he'd just gotten her back.


When his phone rang for the third time he finally snapped out of it and grabbed it quickly. He flipped it open and pressed it to his ear. "Ky, listen we need to--"


"Josh? Honey?"


He stopped short when he heard not Kyra, but his mother's voice interrupting him.

"Ma? What's wrong?" He sat up and tried to untangle himself from the mess of sheets and blankets he was in. He glanced at his watch, it was after ten am.


"Oh, nothing's wrong sweetheart. Um, Bobbie's here."


JC rubbed his eyes and ran a hand through his kinked hair as he frowned.

"What do you mean Bobbie's there?


His mother giggled nervously. "I mean she came for a visit because she couldn't seem to get a hold of you?"


JC groaned. "For fu--" He cut himself off before he could finish his curse and then he sighed. "I'm sorry Ma, is she right there with you?" He asked and when she sort of just hummed in answer he added, "Can you put her on please?"


Damn it. What was he going to do? He'd told her it was over for good the last time but apparently she hadn't gotten the message. He'd thought that not answering any of her calls in the last few days would have helped emphasize his point but it apparently hadn't either.


Damn it, he'd have to change his number.


Again.


He heard some shuffling in the background and then Bobbie's familiar voice said, "Baby? Where are you? I went to the house here and my code didn't work on the gate and the housekeeper wouldn't let me in." She was whining and he could just picture her stomping her foot like a child.


He rolled his eyes but said nothing and she added, "She was acting like she didn't understand english when I know very well that she can...stupid bitch. Your Mom says you're in Miami?"


He pinched the bridge of his nose. He'd told his parents that he was going to spend a few days in Miami, which had been true, but when he'd packed up and gotten on the road, instead of going right he'd gone left and as if he'd been meaning to all along had ended up at the airport and then on a flight to Boston.


"Baby?"


God, how had he ever thought that her voice was sexy? It was like nails on a chalkboard right now.


"No, I'm not in Miami...something came up. I um..."


What the hell was he going to do? He knew Bobbie and how she could fly off the handle when things didn't go her way. If he told her to fuck off right now she'd probably be a massive pain to her parents and wouldn't leave until he showed up.


He sighed again and stood up. "I'll um...I'll call Marcia to let you in. Must have been a misunderstanding."


Yeah, right. When he'd gone to his house in Florida his housekeeper, Marcia, had asked if Bobbie was going to be joining him and he'd told her that they'd broken it off for good.He'd almost laughed when he'd seen the relief on her face. He liked Marcia and though he didn't see her that often she always took on a motherly role towards him, even bringing him home cooked meals for him to reheat when he was there.


Now he felt bad about setting Bobbie on her for most of the day, but he'd apologize and explain when he called her.


If Bobbie was going to be breaking or taking any of his shit, he wanted to be there.


"Just hang tight, I should be there by tonight."


"Okay baby, I'll be waiting for you."


Well this should be interesting.


***





End Notes:
Don't forget to sign up for the NSYNC Fiction Harvest Ball, I did! While you're at it, leave me a review! I'll ship you some homemade spiced apple cider (well not really, but I'll say thanks...)
What?! by LadyX
Author's Notes:
Sorry for the wait, hope you are all still interested in this story. Thanks to elle-miranda for always being happy to read something from me!

Kyra flipped over on her back with a deep sigh. She'd been tossing and turning for what felt like the last five hours. She was sweaty and restless and although she tried to blame all of it on the mugginess in her room, she knew that that wasn't the real reason.


He'd tried to kiss her. And she'd almost kissed him. She wished she had. She was glad she hadn't.


They always did this. They'd be apart for a while and then they'd fall back into their old routine. Nothing ever came out of it other than one of them stepping back and saying that it wasn't the right time. Would there ever be a right time?


She heard her cell phone vibrate on her nightstand. Again. She'd already ignored her land line ringing twice and the subsequent messages he'd left on her answering machine. Her cell phone had been vibrating every hour or so but she hadn't answered it or looked at what she assumed were repeated text messages.


He always did this. He hammered away at her until she'd finally relent, she always did, and then he'd seem to get scared and he'd pull back.


Wash, rinse, repeat.


When her phone buzzed again she gave up and reached for it. She flipped it open to see that she had 2 missed calls and seven waiting text messages.


A bit much dontcha think?


She rolled her eyes and went through the texts. All of them contained basically the same pleading requests for her to call, text or meet him except for the last one which was a short, clipped message telling her something had come up and he had to leave town.


There it was. He was already retreating and she couldn't help but feel a little sad. He hadn't even waited for her to relent this time.


Why had she been so stubborn? These last few days had been some of the best in years. She'd felt happy and relaxed and...loved.


She sighed and dropped her phone onto the bed before she stood up. It was time to face the day without him once again.


***


JC dropped onto his parent's couch with a huff. He'd just spent the last two hours trying to get over the argument he'd had with Bobbie and he'd just needed to get out of the house.


He just got so frustrated with her and the way she acted. He didn't understand how she'd seemingly changed these last few months.


He'd been attracted to her from the moment he'd met her; she'd seemed relatively smart and she had a great smile. They'd hit it off and things had been really good for the first few weeks, but then it seemed like she had started to slowly change.


Not with him at first, but he'd noticed that when she was around the other guys she was always trying too hard. It was sort of obvious and he'd tried to let her know that she only had to be herself around everyone.


Then she'd really taken that to heart and had become someone else. At first it was little things; a pair of shoes here, a dress there. Then he'd found out that she'd somehow gotten her hands on a duplicate of his credit card and had used it. He'd been super pissed but she'd talked--among other things--him down and he'd let her keep it for her to use once in awhile. She was his girlfriend wasn't she? He couldn't spend all of his time with her so if she wanted to get a few things here and there, no biggie.


Except it had become biggies. A car, an apartment, designer clothes. Every time his credit card bill came in there would be a fight.


Then she'd started getting bitchy with the other guys, the staff and just about anyone who came into contact with her.


They'd fight constantly and break up only to get back together when he was craving, well...to be plain, when he was horny. She may have been a lot of things, but bad in bed wasn't one of them.


"So...everything okay?" his mother asked quietly, taking him out of his thoughts as she handed him a cup of steaming coffee and took a seat next to him on the couch.


He accepted the cup and shifted so that she could get comfortable with her blanket and her own coffee.


"Yeah, I guess. I think she got the message this time." He took a sip of the scalding coffee and winced. "That's hot."


His mother smiled. "Most people blow on it first."


He chuckled and shrugged. "Anyway, she shouldn't be coming around anymore. I'm sorry about all that."


And he'd have to have his phone number changed. And possibly his locks. At both houses.


His mother shrugged indicating that it didn't matter to her. "She said you weren't in Miami when I called?"


JC nodded as he blew on his coffee and took another sip. "I was with Ky actually. In Boston."


She nodded and smiled again. "How is she? I'm guessing the two of you made up?"


JC paused mid sip and then shook his head with a chuckle. "You knew we weren't talking?"


Karen shrugged again and sipped her own of coffee. "It was pretty obvious."


"And you never said anything or asked about it?"


She shook her head. "It really wasn't any of my business. I just figured you'd let it out eventually or she'd mention something at some point."


"Do you guys still talk often? I didn't realise she'd kept in contact."


"We used to talk more often before the house got sold since we had a lot of stuff to discuss regarding that. I don't know if you knew then, but your father and I were executors of Laura's will since Kyra was still a minor."


JC nodded. "Yeah, I remember Dad mentioning something at some point back then."


Karen nodded and continued. "Once we were done with all that we didn't speak as often. A few emails here and there to let us know she was doing okay. And then a few months ago she sent us a copy of her book with a little letter thanking us for everything we did to make her dreams become possible."


JC smiled and looked as his mother nodded over to the mantle where a few books were stacked and he noticed the familiar spine of Kyra's novel. He noticed that his Mom suddenly had a little smirk on her lips.


"What?" he asked, setting his cup on the end table near him.


She laughed softly. "Have you read her book?"


He nodded and scratched his cheek as they reddened slightly. It was uncomfortable for him to think about his Mom reading the love scenes that he'd teased Kyra about before. "Um, yeah. Have you?"


She smiled and nodded but kept a sort of knowing look in her eye that puzzled him. "What?" he repeated, prompting her to explain, "Were you embarrassed by the...sexy parts?" He laughed unable to keep from admitting how ridiculous that sounded.


Karen laughed with him, pushed some hair behind her ear as she blushed too. "Well, um, the scenes were written very well...but it's..um...slightly disturbing when you realise she's writing about sleeping with your son."


JC stopped dead and narrowed his eyes. ‘What?" he spat out with an incredulous look on his face.


His Mom laughed nervously again, her cheeks very red now. She hesitated for a moment before she added, "I thought you said you read the book?"


JC's face didn't change and he shook his head. "I did but-"


Karen interrupted him, as if trying to fix something she shouldn't have said. "I mean, we always knew that you and Kyra were..."


JC stood up quickly and brought his hands up defensively, as if to shield himself from what she was saying. "What the hell, Mom? I don't even know what to say right now."


Karen laughed softly again and reached for his arm. "Sit, Josh. I'm not trying to embarrass you. I mean, we were happy you were. Laura and I always had sort of a little bet on when it would happen-"


"What?!" JC stepped back and covered his face with his hands, sliding them up and through his hair. "This is so...this is so awkward Mom, I don't-"


"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to make you feel like that. I was just...I was just suprised when I read the book. I thought for sure then that there would be a possibility for the two of you, it was so obvious. And then when she came by with her fiance to pick up the last of the estate papers-"


"Her what?" JC asked, his eyes now trained fully on Karen while his fists clenched unconsciously.


"What's going on in here?" Asked Tyler's familiar voice as he walked into the sitting room with one of his thick textbooks. He looked between Karen and JC and raised a brow.


"We were just talking about Kyra," Karen said without letting anything out of the bag.


"And how she and Josh used to sleep together and we all knew it? Or about how she wrote a book about him?"


The smirk on Tyler's face was enough for JC to deck him but all he could think about was, What the hell is going on here?

End Notes:
What do you think?
Blueprint by LadyX
Author's Notes:
Thanks to elle-miranda for always fangirling for my writing and being my beta!

I wasn't sure what to think of him at first.


He has this strange sort of shy confidence that seems to radiate from him. I realise it’s kind of oxymoronic to refer to someone’s personality as both shy and confident, but for some reason it fits him. You know the kind of guy that takes forever to speak or make the first move but once he did it and it works, he gains confidence and then won’t shut up? Yeah, that kind of guy.


It also helps that he’s handsome, like seriously good looking, but not the classically handsome type that you see on television or in movies. Cause I mean you wouldn’t think that sharp angles would work with a larger nose and pouty lips.  And yeah, I said pouty. There’s nothing feminine about his lips though, they’re just...supple looking. Shut up, that’s totally a legit thing.


The clincher though is that he has these blue eyes that you just can’t look away from. When he looks at you it’s like you’re the only person in the world he wants to pay attention to. Which to be honest, is a pretty nice change from patients that are glaring at you for waiting too long or covering you in some sort of hazardous human waste. Sometimes simultaneously. I kid you not. Needless to say there is no such thing as a Sexy Nurse uniform in the real world. Sorry boys.


"I walk around scaffoldings on high rise construction sites all day and a friggin' pizza cutter ends up being the death of me."


I chuckle and look up from my task of cleaning the rather deep and rather long laceration on the side of his middle finger.


"I think you'll be fine. You'll just need to be more careful when you stick your hands into dishwater next time."


He laughs softly and looks up at me with those eyes that could rival the most pristine, caribbean blue ocean on earth. “I’m just going to skip doing dishes ever again. For my fingers’ sake you know?”


I can’t help but grin back at him, especially since he’s doing that thing where it’s like I’m alone with him. Which is the furthest from the truth when you take into account that we are in the suture room of a very busy emergency room with people constantly coming in and out.  “Your girlfriend won’t be very happy about that, you may end up with other injuries.”


So apparently I’m pretty obvious in my fishing expedition because his eyes narrow slightly and he smirks. “I don’t have to worry about that since I’m single.”


I nod and try to hide my blush by rearranging the suture kit on the metal tray even though I’d already done that a few moments ago.


Where is the damn doctor?


In my continued attempt to avoid looking at him I roll back in my stool and grab a vacuum sealed syringe from a plastic container and seamlessly fill it with the usual amount of numbing agent required for the suturing.


And then even though I’m not looking at him, I can suddenly feel that the energy he’s been radiating seems to have deflated in one fell swoop. I know this probably sounds crazy, but it’s as if my body and senses, which had been responding to his, suddenly lost cell signal.


Crazy right? It’s at least a little creepy, but hey it happens. When I look up I find that his eyes are settled squarely on the needle in my hand and that he’s gone white as a sheet - even whiter than my grandma’s bleached white sheets.


I frown and put the syringe down onto the tray as I reach forward and check the pulse on his uninjured hand. “Scott? Are you okay?”


He nods slowly and swallows a few times before he says quietly, “Not a fan of needles.”


I nod. This happens. A lot. But for some reason this bothers me more than with most other patients. “It’s okay. It’ll just be a few little sticks and then you’ll be all done. I’ll be here the whole time.”


Why am I talking to him like he’s five? And most of all, why have my fingers slipped from the very medically appropriate pulse point area of his wrist to wrapping themselves around his hand?


I’m not sure, but I do know that those eyes would probably get me to do anything.


-Blueprint by Kyra Campbell; Chapter 2


*


JC awoke suddenly to the very loud sound of a telephone ringing. He blindly reached for it and after picking it up, answered it groggily. It was the front desk advising him that it was noon and that he needed to check out as soon as possible as he’d exceeded the usual check out time. He apologized and hung up feeling tired and slightly disoriented.


He rubbed his eyes and took a moment to get his bearings: He was in a cheap motel off the side of the highway which he’d checked into the night before when he’d driven about as far as he had been physically able to. No matter what he’d tried - loud music, windows wide open, at least seven cups of coffee - he’d kept nodding off until he’d scared himself when he’d veered toward the center line and had had to jerk the steering wheel back to avoid an oncoming car. Deciding that enough was enough, he’d turned into the first motel parking lot he’d seen and thankfully since he probably looked like shit and the employee had accepted his cash payment, he hadn’t been recognized by the name on his credit card.


After the conversation with his mother the previous evening, he’d gone back to his house and had sat in his living room for the longest time in pitch darkness and perfect silence. So many thoughts had been racing through his mind that he didn’t know which to address first. Kyra’s apparently still existing feelings for him. The fact that he was truly single again and that he couldn’t deny his continued attraction to her. The fact that he’d immensely enjoyed spending time with her again and finally the fact that he really had nothing to do for the next few, possibly several, months.


He’d looked on the coffee table and, as if it had been a sign, had seen her book resting there.

He remembered that when he’d walked in earlier that day to confront Bobbie, he’d found her stretched out on the couch reading the book. She’d greeted him as if nothing was wrong and then had made a teasing comment about having found this book on his mantle and how she was surprised that he was reading chick lit. He hadn’t said anything but then she’d added that she’d actually read it for her column and that she hadn’t really enjoyed because for some reason she hadn’t been able to connect to the main male character, so the story had fallen a little flat for her.


How ironic, he thought now as he slipped out of the motel bed and stretched. He’d driven about eighteen of the approximate twenty-four hours it would take him to get from Orlando to Boston, so he still had at least a six hour drive in front of him. First priority: coffee.


*


So driving long distances was shitty. Driving long distances in pissing rain and howling wind? Even shittier. The weather had already added two hours of extra travelling time to his trip and it was pissing him off. He was tired, he was weary, he was nervous and honestly, he smelled a little.


He hadn’t bothered to shower at the motel because he hadn’t wanted to waste time and anyway, he hadn’t wanted to unpack his bag. He’d left on a whim at two am the day before and had only stopped driving around eight pm. He’d meant to only sleep a couple of hours but had overslept until he’d been woken up by the phone at noon. He’d hoped to make it by late afternoon but now it was looking like he’d be there only in late evening.  


How would she react when he showed up at her door, unannounced mind you, for the second time in as many weeks? How would she react when he told her what he had in mind? And most of all, who the fuck was that fiance of hers?


*


Kyra sat down onto the couch, pulling the thick woollen blanket off its arm rest and spreading it over her. She had thick socks on her feet, comfy pajamas, a book and a large glass of wine. In other words, the perfect combination for a windy and rainy saturday evening. It had been so hot for so long, that it had caused some very strange storms in the last day or so. The air had changed from muggy hot to muggy cold and the rain was coming down in thick sheets that were currently pelting her windows loudly.


Although she hadn’t heard any thunder or seen any lightning the electricity had gone out about half an hour ago, effectively separating her from her computer and her writing. To be honest though, it hadn’t been as if she’d been making much headway anyway. She’d tried to write all day but her thoughts would constantly wander off to other things, well honestly to another person, so she hadn’t gotten much done.


As she sipped on her wine and stared at the flickering flame of the large scented candle she’d set up on her coffee table, she couldn’t help but wonder what he was up to.


She hadn’t heard from him since he’d left a little over two days ago; but really, what had she expected? That he would have come back into her life with roses, songs and a ring saying that he couldn’t live without her for another moment?


No. Those things happened in books. Not in real life. And anyway, she already had a ring. In fact it was in the junk drawer of her kitchen right now, still nestled in its black velvet box where she’d placed it after she’d taken it off about eight months ago.


She’d known for quite a while that that ring did not belong on her finger, but she’d never realised how true that was until the moment she’d taken it off during her trip through security when she’d gone to New York. When it had come time to put it back on, she’d decided to stow it safely in her wallet so she wouldn’t have to go through the hassle of taking it off again for the next pass through security.


Grasping at straws? Absolutely.


Then she’d honestly forgotten about it after the flight and the following evening of going out to the hotel bar. She’d hadn’t even thought about it until she’d opened her wallet on her way to the concert the next night. She’d felt guilty and had slipped it onto her finger where it had rested casually until an hour later when she’d spotted JC across the room of the meet and greet. And then it had happened, for reasons she wasn’t sure of, or honestly didn’t want to admit to, her thumb had smoothly slipped to her ring finger and had gently turned the band until the single solitary diamond rested against her palm and left only a simple golden band showing to the world.


*


He’d finally made it. Her house was dark but for a faint glow coming from what he knew to be her living room window. He wondered if she had seen the headlights of his Jeep as he’d pulled into her driveway and suddenly felt even more nervous than he had before. Leave it to him to head out on a twenty four hours plus drive on the whim of a thought, only stopping now to think about what would happen if she turned him away.


Well he knew she wouldn’t turn him away, but if she was marrying some other guy then technically she would be turning him away. Forever and ever amen and all that shit.


One way or another he’d find out in a few minutes he thought as he flipped up the hood of his sweatshirt and stepped out into the rain.


*


She’d thought she’d heard some gravel crunching in her driveway and seen a glow of headlights for a moment but had written it off to someone visiting her neighbor since she hadn’t been expecting anyone. She’d shrugged it off before having another sip of her wine as she turned the page of her book.


Then, a loud knock sounded at her front door and she frowned. She really wasn’t expecting anyone and she really wasn’t dressed to receive. Still, as the knock sounded again and someone rang the doorbell she hurriedly made her way to the door. She switched on the porch light only to remember that things that require electricity don’t work when there’s no electricity. She rolled her eyes and tried to peek through her peephole but couldn’t make out much other than someone standing behind the door. She hesitated to open it, woman living alone and all, but decided to crack open the door while leaving the security chain on.


She pulled open the door and peeked out to see JC standing behind it looking worn and weary. The grey hoodie he was wearing was discolored in areas where the heavy rain had fallen and the hood covered his curly hair. He seemed uncertain and when she looked into his eyes she could see that he was extremely tired but there was something else there too. She couldn’t put her finger on it before she acted instinctively and shut the door in order to remove the chain. When she pulled the door open again he seemed to have tensed up as if he was going to knock on the door again.


He thought she was shutting the door in his face?


She licked her lips and was about to speak his name when he interrupted her. “Don’t marry him.”


She narrowed her eyes. “...what?”


He took a step forward and came closer to her. “Jason...Jackson...John…” He sighed. “You know how much I fuckin’ suck at names.”


Jared? She thought to herself, how had he found out about him?


Although she meant to tell him the truth, all that came out of her mouth was, “Why?”


With a full step over the threshold JC held up something she hadn’t noticed he was holding until now. It was her book.


“Because of this,” he answered before his lips crashed onto hers and then unheard by either of them the book clattered to the floor.


*

End Notes:
Hope you enjoyed it. Please review, you have no idea how much that helps me write faster! ;)
Remembering by LadyX
Author's Notes:
It's finally here! Sorry for the wait guys and thanks A MILLION to elle-miranda for helping me work through the massive block on this chapter. <3

“How come you’re crying?”


Kyra looks up to see a little boy looking at her curiously. He is taller than she is, maybe by three or four inches, or maybe not that much. He’s so skinny that it’s hard to tell.


She sniffs and looks away from him toward the driveway where a moving van is backed up to the front door and men are bringing in boxes and furniture into the house.


“I lost my Puffy.”


“What’s a Puffy?” He asks quietly as he moves closer to where she is sitting on the grass underneath a large oak tree.


“He’s a puffin. And he’s my Puffy. I don’t know where he is,” she answers and picks at the grass moodily.


He takes a seat next to her. “What’s a puffin?”


She looks up and eyes him skeptically. “A puffin is a seabird and I see them all the time.” The skepticism leaves her young voice and she adds quietly, “Well before we moved here.”


The boy nods quietly and they both watch the movers continue their task from their spot under the tree. She sniffs a few more times until all of a sudden the boy stands up quickly and turns to her. “I’ll be right back.”


She watches him run toward the house next to hers, pull open the back door quickly and disappear inside. The sound of the screen door slapping is barely gone from the air before she sees him running back toward her holding something in his hand. When he gets close enough for her to reach, he outstretches the object and offers it to her.


“Here. He’s not a bird. He’s not really puffy either, but maybe he’s good enough until you find your Puffy?”


He grins widely showing a gap between his two front teeth.


She reaches for the stuffed animal which is a lanky giraffe in bright colors. “What’s his name?” She asks as she inspects it more closely.


“I don’t really have a name for him...but maybe we can call him Skinny? He’s got really skinny legs.”


She giggles and hugs the stuffed animal closely, a bright smile appearing on her face for the first time in hours as she thanks him. “What’s your name?”


“I’m Josh.”


*


“It’s pretty,” JC said as he looked at the rather large diamond ring nestled inside the black velvet box resting in his hand.


“Gorgeous,” she agreed as she nodded and tightened her grip on her knees which she had hugged to her chest. Her back was leaned against the armrest of her love seat and he was sitting next to her with his socked feet resting on the coffee table in front of him. “I tried to give it back to him but he refused. Said that he couldn’t imagine giving it to someone else.” She winced slightly as she said it.


He nodded and gingerly ran the tip of his finger over the glittering diamond before he glanced at her and noticed that she was staring at it as well but had tears shining in her eyes.


He snapped the ring box closed and covered it in his fist. “Do you regret breaking up with him?”


She took a moment to answer as she still stared at where the ring had been. She blinked and shook her head slowly. “No.”


He could tell there was more to the story but he didn’t want to press her yet as he didn’t know if she would be willing to share those intimate details with him anymore.


And even though they’d had an “almost moment” earlier when he’d basically re-enacted the mushiest scene in one of her romance novels and kissed her, it had only lasted a mere second before all of the lights in the house had turned back on. The moment had been broken and they’d both pulled apart, taking in the sound of a radio coming back on loudly from another room and the sound of her appliances whirring to life. Then, after spending an uncomfortable moment looking at each other, she’d suggested that they should probably talk.


So now, after a shower on his part and a refilled glass of wine on hers, they were sitting on the couch having that talk. He wasn’t sure where this conversation was going to lead, but at least he felt like he might get to know where he stood with her at this point.


He watched her quietly for a few more moments before her asked the question he felt like he needed to know but may regret asking. “Did he hurt you?”


He was relieved when the question sat her up straighter and she shook her head adamantly. “No, never.” She sort of sighed and deflated a moment later, leaning back against the couch. “I did though. Hurt him, I mean.”


He narrowed his eyes in confusion which prompted her to continue,”I hurt him. He loved me. A lot. And I...I just broke it off.”


She reached forward and took a sip of her wine before placing the glass back onto the coffee table in front of them. “He was perfect. The kind of guy that comes right out of my romance novels you know? Kind, romantic, funny...good looking, rich.” She shrugged.


“But you didn’t love him?” He asked and she shifted causing the blanket covering her legs to slide down. He reached for it and placed it back over her legs.


She looked at him and nibbled at her lip, she seemed to be debating something in her head. “I did at one time but I don’t think…” She trailed off and looked away. When she finished her sentence it came out as barely a whisper. “I don’t think it was enough.”


“Enough for him or for you?”


“For me. I realised that I would never be able to love him as much as he loved me and I didn’t think it was fair for me to do that to him. I just…I knew I’d never be able to give him all of me you know? That he could never have my whole heart...” She shook her head and seemed to not know how to continue. The tears that had been threatening finally started sliding down her cheeks.


He reached out and without thinking any more of it wiped one of them off her cheek with his thumb. “It’s okay, Sweetheart.”


She half hiccupped at that and reached up to grab his hand. “All these years that have gone by, Josh and I’m still clinging to someone who many not even exist anymore. Someone who in his hand,” She turned his hand so that its palm faced upwards. “Still holds part of my heart hostage…”


He felt like a ton of bricks hit him in the chest at her words and he reached forward again to frame her face gently in his hand. “Ky, I...I don’t know how to make this right but I want to. I want to so bad...just let me try okay? I’m here aren’t I? I drove almost 24 hours straight to get back to you and tell you that I need you.”


At his last words her eyebrows raised in surprise and he nodded, confirming his words. “I need you, I do. I don’t know what’s happening with my life right now; with the band, with my solo career, with anything really but what I do know is that I want to be here while I figure it out.”


“What do you-” She started and he finished.


“I thought maybe you could use some help with the house...I know I’m not the greatest handyman, but we could learn together right? I mean, if you wouldn’t mind having me around…”

He trailed off and she watched him quietly for what seemed like a long time until she nodded slowly.


“OK.”


“OK?”


“OK,” she repeated softly and nodded again.


She was still holding his hand and he shifted it so he could link his fingers with hers. She looked down at their joined hands and sighed.


“I’m not ready to be with you, or even think of being with you...I need a little time. Time to reconcile my memories of you with who you are now. And I just….I just need to remember. Remember you, remember me, remember us.”


At this her eyes lifted to his and he nodded quietly. She looked conflicted again and then in a deliberate move she was straddling his lap and her hands were framing in face. She looked him straight in the eyes as if she was searching for something then slowly she leaned forward and pressed her lips to his.


The kiss was slow and measured. And although there was a clear sense of yearning in the push and pull of their lips, their bodies held no tension and there were no hurried catches of breath or gripping of clothing. It was simply two lovers getting to know each other again with every brush of lip and stroke of tongue. Lips that had once known the roadmap to each other's hearts finally finding their home. Or like a warm hug shared between long lost friends that made them feel like they’d never actually been apart.


Though he could have kept kissing her for hours, he pulled his lips back and opened his eyes to find her with her eyes closed and her lips parted. Her breath feathered his damp lips as he whispered, “Do you remember now?”


With a very slight shake of her head and her eyes still closed she whispered back. “Turns out I never forgot…”

 



End Notes:
Hope you enjoyed it. Don't forget to send in your nominations for the NF Awards!
Dusty Keys by LadyX
Author's Notes:

THANK YOU so very much for all of the nominations for this story! I'm so glad that you are enjoying how this story unfolds. Stay tuned for more! 

 

Also, a million thanks to elle-miranda for always listening to my crazy harebrained ideas...and encouraging them! 

“Go on in, Sweetheart,” Roy Chasez says as he motions to the screened back door of the house from his spot on the back deck. “He’s still in the living room practicing.”


“Thank you, Mr. Chasez,” Kyra replies happily as she quickly rushes up the deck stairs and pulls open the screen door that leads into the kitchen. As she toes off her shoes she hears the sound of a power saw whirring to life outside mixing with the familiar strains of a piano being played in the living room inside.


Although this has been the usual routine for the last four years, she’s never lost the sense of awe at listening to him practice. Every other morning during summer school break always had either one of them show up at the other’s house early in the morning ready for the day’s adventures, but Saturday's always began with piano practice.


“Try to stick to the melody on the sheet music, Josh, “ Karen says softly as she points to the sheet music resting on the stand in front of them. “Good,” she nods as he complies and her finger follows the notes.


As usual, Kyra quietly takes a seat on the corner of the couch waiting patiently for the lesson to end. She looks around the familiar living room and notices a new picture frame on the mantle near her. In it she sees a recent picture of the Chasez kids along with her, crowded around a picnic table at their annual end of school year BBQ. She grins at the memory just as Karen turns from her perch on the piano bench and smiles at Kyra.


“Hi, Honey,” she says as she stands. “How about I go make you two a snack?”


Kyra smiles back and nods while JC turns on the bench. “Hey! I didn’t hear you come in.”


She giggles and quickly hops up from her spot on the couch to climb onto the piano bench to sit next to him. “You never do, that’s why I’m so good at hide and seek.”


He laughs softly and reaches forward to gather the sheet music together in one stack.


“Teach me something,” she says as she scoots closer to the keyboard and presses her fingers down onto the smooth keys tentatively.


He smiles and plays a little melody quickly with his own fingers and she grins. “Is that what’s on there?” She asks pointing to the top of the sheet music stack in front of them.


He shakes his head. “Nah, I just made it up. I like doing that more than following the sheet music. I think it sounds better.”


“You can just make it up in your head? How do you know what sounds good together?”


He shrugs self-consciously. “I dunno, I just do. How do you know what to write when you write me a story?”


It’s her turn to shrug. “I just do.”


Both of them stay quiet for a moment until he starts tapping out another melody and teaches her how to duplicate it. They giggle when she messes up and she quickly loses patience just before Karen comes back into the room carrying two small plates with celery sticks filled with cheese wiz.


As she hands them each a plate, making sure to hand over the one with sliced olives to Kyra, she says, “How about you go out and eat this on the deck? Dad should be almost done with the new ladder on the treehouse.”


Not having to tell them twice, both kids quickly hop off the piano bench clutching their snack and head toward the back door echoing thank yous on the way.


*


JC flipped open the fallboard with a rusty complaint from its hinges. He examined the keys carefully, pleased to see that they seemed to have fared rather well in their protective encasement beneath the fallboard. He gingerly pressed down on one of the keys using his forefinger and winced at the sound.


He’d been rooting around downstairs to find the last of the tiles they were using to redo the kitchen and dining room floor when he’d stumbled onto a large object covered with a drop cloth. With a swish of fabric and a cloud of choking dust he’d discovered a well worn, and apparently very out of tune, upright piano. He’d run his hand over the carved wood before pulling out the bench nestled beneath it. He’d momentarily been worried when the bench creaked under his weight, but the age of the piece didn’t betray the strength of the hardwood used in older times.


He stood up to push open the top cover and propped it open with another squeak of hinges. He peered down and examined the hammers and strings revelling in the old fashioned handywork. Everything seemed intact, only severely out of tune and in need of some TLC. Just as he was about to lean down and examine the foot petal underneath, he heard Kyra yell from the top of the stairs.


“You get lost?”


He wiped his hands on his already dirty jeans and closed the top cover followed by the fallboard as he called back. “No. I’ll be right up.”


After covering his find with the earlier discarded drop cloth he quickly grabbed the last two boxes of tiles and hurried back up the basement stairs with an idea swimming through his mind.


*

“What do you know about the piano in the basement?” JC asked as he sat on the one of the stools in front of the newly installed kitchen island.


“What piano?” She asked from behind the fridge door.


He looked up from his task of building his sandwich with the items spread out in front of him to glance at her: he knew she was lying by the tone of her voice.


“The piano under the drop cloth in the basement.”


She closed the fridge door and walked over to the island, setting the mustard bottle down amongst the spread. “Oh, is that what was under that?” She said as she took a seat on the stool facing him to start building her own sandwich.


He watched her quietly with an amused look on his face until she looked up and met his eye with a dramatic “What?”


He shrugged and chuckled. “Other than the fact that you’re still a terrible liar and I know that face from a million miles away, I wonder why of all things you’d lie about something like that.”


She sighed again, also somewhat dramatically, as she piled on another three slices of deli turkey onto her sandwich. “Fine. I figured that’s what it was but I didn’t want to look, okay?”


He quirked a brow as he picked up his sandwich. “Why not?”


He wasn’t prepared for the answer and he paused with his sandwich halfway to his mouth when she replied. “ ‘Cause what else would me having a piano in my house be useful for, other than to remind me every day that I don’t have you anymore?”


He gulped and set his sandwich back down onto his napkin. He rested his hands on the counter uncomfortably. “Oh. I uh-”


She shook her head and waved her hand dismissively. “Don’t worry about it.”


They sat in silence for a few minutes as they quietly ate their sandwiches until JC couldn’t stand the uncomfortable feeling in his stomach anymore.


“So you still like a lot of meat between your buns huh?” He teased with a smirk as he finally looked up at her again, trying to break the tension.


She laughed looking at her sandwich, which really was rather thick with more meat and less toppings, but got his double-entendre either way. She looked back at him challengingly and smirked back. “Well not everyone uses as little meat as you do…”


JC clutched his chest and let out a wounded howl before they both started laughing. When finally the laughter softly died out, he reached over and slid his hand across the counter to link his fingers to hers, squeezing them gently.


Nothing more needed to be said.


*






End Notes:
Make sure you vote for your favorites and leave my a review if you enjoyed the chapter!
Shadows by LadyX
Author's Notes:
Thank again to elle-miranda for being a speedy and excited beta!

Kyra stretches her back as she stands in the now immobile bus. Her ass is sore and her legs are restless after the seven hour drive. Thankfully her seatmate has been quiet the entire time, sleeping for most of the way, so that she’s not had to make uncomfortable small talk during the trip. She yawns as she reaches up to grab her suitcase from the overhead compartment and then grab her shoulder bag from under her seat. She smiles and nods at her now awake seatmate and then follows the slowly moving line of people getting off of the bus.


As soon as she steps off of the bus she is met with a frigid wind that whips stinging pieces of snow and ice pellets against her cheeks.  She shivers and buries her face into the folds of the scarf around her neck as her eyes scan the crowded bus station parking area. Several people are milling about either getting on or off buses, greeting family and friends hurriedly in the stormy weather. It’s Christmas time and people are happy to see each other and though the weather could be better the excitement of the upcoming holidays seems to permeate the air around her.


She walks through a crowd of people as she tries to get closer to the parking area where her Mother should be waiting. Her boots crunch on the frozen ground and fallen snow as she hikes her shoulder bag higher and scans the area.


She can’t wait to finally be home and sit in front of the living room fireplace with a hot drink and her Mother. She hasn’t been home since the start of her first college semester and she looks forward to talking to her Mother about everything she’s been experiencing.


She can’t wait to sleep in her own bed, in her own room, that doesn’t have “not so mysterious” sounds coming from the next bed over; she can’t wait to eat a home cooked meal that doesn’t include some type of mystery meat and she can’t wait to not have to wear flip flops in the shower.


But most of all, she can’t wait to see Josh. They had spoken on the phone about a week ago and he’d confirmed to her that he’d be home a day or two after she arrived, depending on when he could get away from Orlando. He would stay for Christmas and another day or two before packing up and heading back to Orlando to prepare for his move to Germany.


She just can’t wait to see him again and talk to him about everything going on in her life, everything going on in his. And though it still stings a little that he’ll be moving so far away, he’s been so excited about the prospects of what the move will entail for him and his career that she can’t help but also feel a little excited for him as well.


As a strong gust of cold wind whips up some loose snow on the ground, she shivers again and looks around once more. She can’t see her mother’s car anywhere and is just about to turn around to go into the bus station to find a payphone when she hears someone call out her name.


When she turns she finds not her mother but Roy, Josh’s dad, waving to her with a soft smile on his lips. Though she finds it odd that he’s the one picking her up, it has happened before so she smiles and makes her way over to him.


“Hi, Mr. Chasez,” she says with a smile as she drops her suitcase and reaches up to give him a tight hug.


“Hi Sweetheart,” he says against her hair and returns her hug before holding her away from him with another smile. “You know, you’re a college girl now; an adult. You can call me Roy.”


Kyra laughs softly and shrugs knowing she wouldn’t be doing that any time soon. He leans down, grabs her suitcase and starts walking toward the parking lot where he must have parked the family car.  “Where’s Mom?”


“She got held up at work, a little bit of overtime, so she asked me to pick you up.” He answers as they get to the car and he unlocks the passenger door for her to get inside. “Get in, it’s cold.”


She nods as she climbs into the car and shuts the door. She watches in the rear view mirror as Roy goes around the car to put her suitcase in the trunk. Although she’s happy to see him, she’s disappointed that her Mother isn’t there to greet her at the bus station like you see in the movies.


Okay, so that’s a little corny but she’s been looking forward to it for weeks now and had sort of built it up in her head. She tends to do that once in awhile and though Josh always makes fun of her for it, she can’t help it.


Oh well, she thinks as Roy climbs into the driver's seat and sets off toward their neighborhood, she’ll see her later when she gets home from work. After all she really can’t blame her Mom for picking up a few extra shifts here and there, especially since she’s helped so much with the cost of her tuition already.


The drive is short and quiet as Roy isn’t much of a talker and she’s used to it. The quiet feels comfortable though and when they’ve finally pulled into the driveway she grins widely as she sees both hers and the Chasez house decorated with brightly lit multicolored Christmas lights and candles in the windows. It’s Christmas and she’s home.


When Roy quietly asks her to come in and say hello to Karen who has something prepared for her to take home, she happily follows him inside hoping to find a stuffed pepper casserole ready for her to heat up. Karen knows that it’s her favorite and to be honest she’s absolutely starving right now. Just as she’s planning to put on her jammies and chill in her house while waiting for her Mom to come home she sees Karen sitting at the kitchen table clutching a cup of coffee.


The mood in the room seems heavy and unfamiliar as she looks between Karen and Roy who followed her inside. Karen’s eyes are red and she’s fidgeting with the handle of her coffee cup as she looks behind Kyra to Roy and then to Kyra.


Instantly Kyra knows that something’s  wrong. She narrows her eyes and looks at Karen questioningly. “What’s wrong?”


Roy walks over to the table and takes the seat across from Karen while she shakily motions to the seat in front of them. “Have a seat, Honey.”


Kyra shakes her head and stands her ground a few feet from them. “What’s wrong?” She repeats feeling a knot start to form in the pit of her stomach.


Karen bites her lip and looks at Roy before she starts. “Ky, I’m so sorry...but there’s been an accident.”


Kyra’s stomach dips and her heart skips. “Josh?”


Karen shakes her head, “No, Josh is fine. It’s your Mom she-”


“My mom?” Kyra interrupts and shakes her head, it hadn’t even crossed her mind that they could be talking about her Mother. “What’s going on with my Mom?”


“Early this morning she was driving home from her shift and well...they’re not sure yet what happened...but she got into an accident.” Karen opened one of her small fists to use the tissue she had apparently been clutching in it to dab at her eyes.


Kyra’s thoughts start to swirl every which way as she stands there, rooted to the spot as her lips can’t seem to form any kind of sound. Her eyes kept flitting between Roy and Karen as if she’s waiting for one of them to tell her that it’s all a joke and that everything is really fine.


Suddenly she snaps back to reality and starts looking around as if keys or a car are magically going to appear. “I’ve got to get the hospital.”


When neither Karen or Roy move from their spot at the table she suddenly feels a flash of absolute anger surge through her body. Why aren’t they moving? Why didn’t they take her directly to the hospital?


Just as she’s about to yell those thoughts to them, the front door opens and Josh hurriedly walk into the house. When their eyes connect and he drops his duffle bag to the floor, it takes no words: the look on his face says it all.


Suddenly, her world goes black.


 

*



JC’s bare feet quietly padded on the wooden floor as he left the bathroom to head back to his bedroom. He’d woken up a while ago and had been unable to fall back asleep, so he’d laid in his bed staring at the ceiling for what had felt like a long time.  


So many things had been going through his mind lately that he sometimes laid awake for hours during the night. He was getting increasingly pressured into meeting with producers and writers to get started on a solo album but he was still torn. If he was going to put something out there that was his and only his, he didn’t want to do a rush job of it or have anyone else tell him what he should be doing. Of course he had lots of songs or pieces of songs ready to work on but he’d been so focused on writing for the group that solo things had always been pushed to the side.


One day. Someday. Today? He didn’t know.


He’d had a meeting with the guys and Johnny, well the guys minus Justin, the previous weekend where they’d been told that Justin was going to need more time than expected to put out his album. Studio time they’d booked had been pushed back for another few months, possibly a year.


And then he’d realized it: Justin wasn’t coming back. It was over.


He really couldn’t feel angry at Justin for seizing and opportunity when it knocked though he did feel some betrayal at how things were going down. It had been obvious for a while that the record company and the execs had been grooming Justin for something other than the group. They’d even started to joke about it, like at one of their photo shoots when the photographer kept putting Justin in front of everyone, Joey had started humming “Don’t Speak” by No Doubt under his breath. It had been funny at the time and Justin had seemed embarrassed by it but it hadn’t gone any further than that.


JC knew that he’d be willing to keep the group going without Justin. After all the four of them could sing and they already had some material lined up and ready for the next album. All it would take would be a little shuffling around of the solo parts and it would work. Plus, the other guys would finally be able to be more present in the songs than they had been with the last two albums. It would be different but they could do it.


But in the meantime, did he try to hack it on his own as well? He’d been asked to write and record a song for a movie soundtrack and he hadn’t declined. Just one song couldn’t hurt right? He was supposed to meet with an Orlando based producer named Dallas Austin next week to see if they could work together for the project, it couldn’t hurt to make more connections either right?


Being in Boston with Kyra for the last month and a half had really helped. It was nice for him to have a relatively normal life again. He didn’t have to be anywhere he didn’t want to, he didn’t have to answer his phone if he didn’t feel like it. He could just be.


The last years had been incredible and he wouldn’t give them back for the world, but they had been hectic. Always something on the go, always someone to see or something to do. It was nice to be able to do what he wanted, when he wanted to again.


Plus being with Kyra again was a major plus. It was nice to see that their relationship was slowly repairing itself and how they truly enjoyed being around each other again. They were each other’s connections to home and it was comforting to the both of them.


Of course they were both adults now and the sexual tension between them had only grown as they had matured. It was no different now although neither wanted to admit it to the other. The daily interaction between them while they worked alongside each other either tiling a floor or painting a room had started to feel natural again. To him, she didn’t seem nearly as guarded as before. He no longer felt so uncertain when he was close to her, unsure if she’d recoil if he brushed up against her or if he hugged or touched her without asking her first.


He’d even kissed her again. He hadn’t planned to or anything, it’d just happened.


They’d been painting the living room one afternoon when he’d accidentally knocked her over as she was crouched down painting the moldings near the floor. He had been looking up at the ceiling as he’d used a roller attached to a broomstick and hadn’t noticed her there. She’d lost her balance and had fallen to the floor, spilling the little cup of paint she’d been holding in her hand all over her shirt and her arm. Instantly he’d put down his roller and apologized profusely as he’d watched her look down at herself with surprise. When he’d crouched down himself to help her up, before he knew it he’d felt the cold bristles of a paintbrush gliding across the skin of his cheek and then down his shirt. She’d laughed in a faked diabolical tone and he’d lunged, effectively pinning her down onto the floor while holding her arms up over her head so that she couldn't use the paintbrush again. They’d laughed and then without thinking, he’d just done it. Paint covered and all, he’d kissed her.


He’d been pleased that she’d responded favorably, kissing him back with no hesitation at all. It had been such a relief, to him that kiss had felt real. It had made him feel like it was him and Kyra, together again. Like it was once again them against the world with no one else that could peek into or understand their connection. It hadn’t felt like she was kissing him searching for something that she wondered was still there. It hadn’t felt like either of them was trying to prove anything to the other: it was just them. The two of them, kissing again and enjoying each other’s company. Both wanting more than what they’d had for a long time.


The kiss hadn’t lead to anything more but he knew it was just a matter of time. They always found their way back to each other.


Now as he quietly passed by Kyra’s door which stood slightly ajar, he heard a sound that stopped him in his tracks. He narrowed his eyes and listened for a moment before deciding that he must have heard wrong. He shivered slightly and the skin on his bare arms pimpled up into goose flesh. He always slept in his underwear preferring the heavy weight of blankets over his body to keep him warm rather than layers of clothing. So on this chilly night standing in the slightly drafty hallway he started thinking of his warm bed again.


But then, just as he was about to move away from her door, he heard it again. This time it was clear to him that the sound really was coming from her room. She was crying.


He didn’t think first, just acted and pushed open the door to her room. His eyes which had already adjusted to the dim light in the hallway searched the room to find her curled up in her bed. Although there were no lights on, the glow from the full moon shining through the sheer curtains of the large window across the room cast a bright enough light for him to see her. The sheets and blankets on her bed were tangled up around her as if she’d been moving around restlessly for hours and her face was obscured by her pillow. He could see a bare leg hooked over a bundle of blankets and a bare shoulder where her oversized shirt had slipped off.


He could tell that she was still asleep and for a moment he felt like he was intruding on her privacy. The thought of leaving her be or at least leaving to go put some clothes on first flitted through his mind before she whimpered again and he couldn’t think of anything else but fixing whatever was hurting her. Not wasting another second he moved quickly to her bed and sat down on the edge. He pushed some hair away from her face and his fingertips glided across the soft skin of her cheek, encountering wetness along the way.


“Ky,” he whispered softly and she didn’t move. His hand moved to her bare shoulder and he gently shook her. “Honey, wake up. It’s only a dream.”


Her eyes opened and she blinked them a few times causing some loose tears to follow the path forged by the others before them. She sat up quickly using one hand to wipe her eyes and nose while the other pulled the mess of blankets up to her chest. She seemed taken aback at his presence in her room, on her bed nonetheless, because her eyes kept flickering between his face, his bare chest and a spot up on the wall behind him.


She cleared her throat. “I, um sorry. Did I wake you?”


He shook his head and shifted slightly as he self consciously crossed his arms over his chest. “Nah, I was awake.”


She nodded and ran a hand through her tangled hair. She seemed embarrassed that she’d been crying in her sleep.


“I’m sorry, sometimes I can’t help it when I’m slee-”


“Do you want to talk about it?”


They’d spoken at the same time. He smiled and motioned for her to go first but she shook her head.


“Do you want to talk about it?” he repeated and she nibbled at her lip thoughtfully before she shook her head.


He nodded. He didn’t want to press her. After a few more moments of silence he cleared his throat. “Well um, I guess I should go back to bed. Are you going to be okay?”


She nodded, averting his gaze as she fidgeted with the edge of a sheet. “Mmhmm.”


“Okay, then. Um, goodnight.” He slipped off of the bed and before he’d taken two steps toward the door she spoke again in a tiny voice.


“Josh?”


He turned and found that she had shifted up slightly. “Mm?”


“Actually...could you, could you stay? Until I fall asleep?”


He smiled and nodded. “Of course,” he answered as he made his way back to her and helped her fix the blankets on her bed. Just as he was about to climb into bed next to her, he stopped and motioned to her bedroom door. “Did you want me to go get a shirt first?”


He didn’t need any more light in the room to tell that she was blushing when she shook her head as a small smile tugged at her lips.


At least seeing him half naked was making her smile again.


He chuckled quietly and slid into bed next to her, pulling the covers over the both of them as she quickly curled her body against his, her cheek finding a comfortable spot on his shoulder. His arm curled itself around her waist and he held her close. She stayed quiet for a long time until he actually wondered if she’d fallen back asleep when she finally spoke.


“I miss her,” she whispered, emotion still evident in her voice.


He knew she was talking about her Mother and it broke his heart that she was still dealing with her grief all these years later. Alone.


He leaned down and pressed his lips to the top of her head. “I know you do.”


He didn’t know what to say and really, there weren’t any words he could use to make things better or different. So he didn’t say anything at all, hoping that the fact that he was there, holding her in his arms as she felt what she needed to feel was enough.


As they lay there quietly he was unable to keep his thoughts from wandering back to one of the last times they had laid together like this. It had been a few days after her mother’s funeral and he’d gone to her house to check on her since he hadn’t heard from her all day. While everything was going on with setting up arrangements, he’d tried to be at her side as much as possible though she’d kept him at arm's length. It had hurt him at first because all he wanted to do was to take care of her, protect her from any more hurt than she should have to deal with at that time, but then he’d realized that she was treating everyone the same way.


He hadn’t seen her cry once since she’d gotten the news and this had worried him. The only emotional reaction she’d had was when she’d passed out the moment she’d seen him walk through the door of his parents house on the day of the accident. At that time he’d picked her up and carried her to his bedroom where he’d laid her down on his bed and had held her until she’d come back around.


He still remembered the look on her face when she’d asked him in the voice of a wounded animal if her mother was dead. When he’d nodded he’d seen tears well up in her eyes but they’d never spilled over. It had only taken a moment for her to enter what he could only call a trance at the time. She’d become a robot; talking to people when spoken to, answering their questions and accepting their condolences all the while dealing with arrangements that should have been handled by someone a lot older and a lot more experienced than her.


But she’d done it, and she’d done it well. His parents had helped of course but it had seemed to him that she’d needed to be the one in charge in order to deal, or not deal, with her grief at that time. So he’d watched her from afar, knowing that when the time came she would ask.


And she had. When he’d gone up to her room that day, he’d found her curled up in her bed staring at the door. Her face had been blank and her eyes had seemed so tired as she watched him walk from the door to her bed. He’d sat down on her bed and quietly waited for her to speak.


“It’s like I can’t feel anything anymore,” she’d said flatly as she’d kept her eyes glued to the door.


It had broken his heart further to hear her say the words and to hear the weariness in her voice. All he’d wanted to do at that moment was to make everything in the world go away, at least for a little while.


“What can I do?” he’d asked feeling powerless to do anything to help her.


Then to his surprise she’d sat up and looked him in the eyes. “Make me feel something again,” she’d whispered as she’d leaned in to press her lips to his. “Please, Josh.”


And he had.


He’d made love to her for what felt like hours, both wanting to make her feel good again and to offer her the release of tension and emotion she seemed to yearn for so badly. When it’d been over, they’d laid together for several more hours as she’d cried herself in and out of sleep while he held her telling her that everything would be okay, even though they both knew her life would be changed forever.


“...stay?” He caught the end of a softly spoken sentence and he returned to the present in her dimly lit room.


“What?” He asked quietly and she repeated what she must have said before.


“Can you stay? Even after I fall asleep, can you stay?”


He smiled and took his arm out from behind his head to slip his hand into hers over his heart. As he entwined his fingers with hers he whispered, “Always.”

 

 

End Notes:
Hope it was worth the wait, I'd love to hear what you liked!
Keyboards by LadyX
Author's Notes:
As always, thank you to elle-miranda for everything. Please accept three thousand open robed pictures of JC fresh off the press today as compensation.

 

His lips feel like fire. They turn the blood running through my veins into a stream of hot lava as he runs them over my skin. I shiver when the tip of his tongue feathers my fevered skin and then release a small gasp from parted lips. My mouth feels dry, I lick my lips and open my eyes to watch his journey over the valleys and peaks of my body. He is beautiful: his hair wild and curly, kinked  from the gripping of my fingers. His skin glistens with a slight sheen of perspiration as I watch his bare back clench and relax, the tight muscles of his forearms and triceps flex as they as react to his every movement. My heart beats wildly in my chest and though there are many things I want to tell him, none of them make it out of my mouth. Moans, sighs and gasps are the only way I can communicate right now. Especially since his mouth has now found a prominent peak and his tongue and lips are expertly moving over it as one of his hands covers the other possessively. And then his mouth is travelling again and his body weight shifts and he feels heavy on me. I welcome the weight and my legs wrap around his waist easily. It’s what I want. What I’ve wanted since he laid his eyes on me. I know it’s what he wants too because soon he’s whispering that into my ear using words that should only be used behind closed doors. I’m only half listening though, because as bare skin shifts over bare skin stars explode behind my eyes and my back arches in pleasure.  His breath is heavy against my cheek and I feel his-

 



“I’m home!”


Kyra gasped and pushed her chair back from her desk in surprise as JC’s voice sounded close to her ear. She barely had time to get her bearings before she heard his yelp and turned to watch him hop away from her workstation toward the door of her office.


“Goddamn it!” He yelled gripping his socked foot. “You rolled right onto my foot!”


“I’m sorry!” She yelled back over the loud bass of the music she’d been listening to as she’d been writing. “I didn’t hear-”


“Can you turn that shit down?” He yelled again, now leaning against the doorframe as he massaged his left foot.


She reached over and pressed stop on the CD player which had been blaring a sexy R&B song she’d had on repeat for the last hour as her fingers had flown across the keyboard. She tended to block most things out when she was on a roll and apparently she’d done it again.


“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to hurt you. I hadn’t heard you come in,” she started then narrowed her eyes at him as she crossed her arms over her chest. “Wait a minute, what the hell were you doing creeping behind me like some...creeper?”


He was still acting like the pain in his foot was the worst pain he’d ever felt in his life and she rolled her eyes at him.


“I wasn’t creeping! I yelled a few times when I came in and then I just followed the music. You know, you’re lucky I’m not on tour anymore.”


He made a big show of hobbling over to the edge of her L-shaped desk and then hopped on to take a seat as he usually did when they were in her office.


“Oh yeah? Why’s that?” She asked eyeing him teasingly.


“Because I’m damn sure you’d get in trouble for injuring me. I’m not even sure I can ever work again at this point. I might need an emergency amputation.”


She laughed and rolled her eyes again. “Sure.”


He eyed her in a fake angry look until he wasn’t able to keep a straight face anymore. He laughed and he shrugged before he reached down and gave his foot a final squeeze. “That did hurt for real though, but I think I’ll live.”


“Thank God. Or else I’d have your Mom, your manager and millions of pre-pubescent girls wanting to burn me at the stake if anything ever happened to you.”


He chuckled again and then nodded over to her computer screen. “Getting some writing done? I thought you’d submitted the second book to your editor already.”


She turned to look at her screen and suddenly remembered what she had been writing. She felt her cheeks flame as she tried to casually reach over to her mouse so she could click out of her word processor. “I-um, yeah. I did, I was just...um, writing something else.”


A look passed over his features and the hint of a knowing smile appeared on his lips only for a moment before it went away. He nodded and pulled his cell phone out of his pocket as she heard it vibrate in the now quiet room. He flipped it open and read what seemed to be a text before flipping it closed again.


“How was your trip? Did it go as well as you thought it would?” She questioned, crossing one leg over the other as she settled back into her chair.


He smiled and nodded. “Pretty good actually, and yeah it went better than I thought. I really like Dallas, I think we’re going to work together well.”


She nodded and smiled. The last few weeks had been interesting to watch as he’d seemed to have transformed from someone who had been momentarily lost on his journey through life to someone who again had purpose and goals.


It had all started almost two months ago when he’d met with a producer from Atlanta named Dallas Austin. They’d worked together to write and produce a song for an upcoming movie soundtrack and it’d gone well. Really well because for the first time since he’d ‘moved’ into her house during his hiatus he seemed to have a more defined sense of purpose.


She could tell from the way he talked about music again, the way he was making plans, even the way he walked. It was like some of his confidence was back and she enjoyed watching him. Not that she hadn’t been enjoying the down-home JC that seemed like he was just as happy tiling a floor or painting a wall than being in a recording studio, but she liked creative JC. Always had.


He’d seemed even happier last week when she’d arrived him from a shift at the bookstore to find him leading her into the living room where she’s been surprised to see a piano set up there. He’d explained that he’d cleaned it up and had had it tuned so that it could be used again. He’d asked if it was okay for it to stay in the living room and she hadn’t hesitated to say yes. The look in his eyes and the way he lovingly stroked the newly varnished wood of the piano indicating how proud he was of his work made it a no brainer. And as if she’d really needed any kind of confirmation that it was the right decision, he’d sat down and played her a song which would have severely skewed her decision making process anyhow.


“So yeah, I’m going to go back next week.” He said, apparently still talking about his experience with the producer in Atlanta while she was thinking about something else.


Kyra nodded and looked down at the bottom of her shirt to needlessly rearrange it . She knew that he would be able to tell that she was disappointed with the news and she didn’t want him to see it. It was silly really, she knew that he hadn’t moved into her house permanently. That he was just there to pass the time between now and whenever his next big opportunity came up.


“Also, since it’ll bring me pretty close to Thanksgiving I might as well just go directly to Florida for the extra couple of days. I’ll pick you up at the airport when you get in. It’ll be a practice run for when we travel home for Christmas.”


That caused her to look up and narrow her eyebrows slightly. “Christmas?”


He eyed her questioningly. “You said you’d come home with me to Bowie for Christmas remember?”


She bit her lip and turned in her chair to start absently tidying up her desk unnecessarily. She remembered telling him she would accompany him after he’d pressed her about it several times, but she really had had no intention of going home with him.


Especially not for Christmas.


“I’m pretty hungry, you want to get some take-out or something?” She asked as she stood from her chair and started heading for the door of her office, clearly trying to avoid the subject.


“Yeah, sure. Just...wait.” He reached out and grabbed hold of the hem of her shirt to keep her from leaving. She turned to look at him and he reached to slip his fingers through hers, tugging her closer. She sighed and let him pull her close, felt his arms wrap loosely around her waist. He waited until she looked at him and then he held her gaze for a few moments before speaking.


“Ky.” She looked away from him and he spoke her name again. When she returned her eyes to his he continued, “It’s okay to be scared to go back.”


She shook her head. “I’m not scared.”


He shrugged. “Okay, well maybe not scared. But I get why you may not want to go home, especially during the holidays.”


She lifted a shoulder slowly but didn’t say anything.


He tightened his arms causing her to move closer and she leaned her forehead down onto his shoulder. He reached up to move her hair from her neck and leaned down to press his lips gently against it. “I’ll be there with you. And everyone really wants to see you.”


She sighed again and raised her arms up to wrap around his neck to give him a hug. She held onto him until she finally spoke quietly, “I’ll think about it.”


He nodded and kissed her temple. “Okay. That’s all I ask.”


After a few more moments of holding each other the moment was broken by the sound of her stomach crying out for some sustenance. She hadn’t eaten much today and she was paying for it now.


He chuckled and they broke apart, she rubbed her stomach self consciously. “Sorry, guess I’m hungrier than I thought. I was writing and got caught up I guess.”


He shrugged and hopped off the desk, his earlier life-threatening injury apparently forgotten. “Let’s get you some food.”


She started to follow him out of her office when he suddenly stopped walking and looked back at her, causing her to bump into him. “And by the way, you realise that I’m right here right?”


She raised her brows in question, not following his train of thought.


“You don’t have to keep writing about it; it can actually happen.”


The last words were spoken so close to her lips that she felt his breath brush against them. It didn't take much for her to know what he was referring to and she blushed.


She didnid’t have time to answer when he pecked her lips quickly and grinned. “But one hunger at a time, shall we?”


*


About forty-five minutes later Kyra heard the kitchen side door close and watched as JC came back in carrying two brown paper bags stacked on top of each other. “Sorry, the place was packed. I had to wait twenty minutes just to order.”


“It’s okay, gave me a chance to clean up a little bit. You didn’t have any issues?”


He shook his head as he placed the two bags on the table and started ripping the paper to pull out the foam take-out containers which contained some fresh fish and chips from a new restaurant a few blocks away. They’d been meaning to try their food since they’d opened a few weeks ago but hadn’t had the chance to. JC had offered to go out and get their order but she’d been unsure if that was a great idea since he still garnered quite a bit of attention when he was out in public. Still, he knew how to act and dress in order to minimize the chance of recognition so he chanced it once in awhile so that he didn’t feel like he was constantly stuck indoors.


“Nah. The girls waiting in line behind me thought I couldn’t hear them whispering, but I could.” He laughed as he set out the food and accepted the beer she handed him as she joined him at the table. “They didn’t make a scene though, so I’m glad.”


She nodded as she took a seat at the table across from him, taking a deep breath as she took in the smell of the freshly fried fish and hand cut chips. “This looks great. Did you happen to get me some extra tartar sauce? I forgot to mention it wh-”


She grinned and laughed as he pulled out two extra plastic condiment cups filled with what she assumed was tartar sauce. “Thanks.”


He grinned back and nodded as he also took a seat and pulled his meal closer. “I heard good things while I was in line, so I’m hungry!”


As he started attacking the pile of fries, she started eating the coleslaw and smirked at him from across the table. “So, how much did you actually read earlier?”


He laughed, breaking off a piece of fish and watched as steam rose from the two pieces. “Enough to know that I should probably walk around with my shirt off more often, ya know? So you can watch my back muscles flex with every movement…”


She threw a fry at him and he laughed again. “And you just assume that I was writing about you? A little conceited don’t you think?”


He shrugged and then twirled a strand of his long hair in one of his fingers. “I mean, who else has wild, curly hair that makes you want to kink it with your fingers…”


She rolled her eyes and laughed again as she picked up her piece of fish and took a bite. The batter was crisp and light, the fish flaky and fresh. She hummed in satisfaction as she chewed slowly and swallowed before taking another bite. She was just about to tell him how good she thought the fish was when the tell-tale tingling at the back of her throat started.


Her eyes widened and she leaned forward to spit out the bite of fish still in her mouth. It had been so long since she’d been through this that she panicked, grasping her throat and quickly standing to run over to the kitchen sink.


She heard JC calling her name and then the sound of what was probably his beer bottle tipping over and rolling onto the floor with a crash just before she felt his arms go around her waist and she started gasping for breath.




*








End Notes:
Such an exciting day for the JC fandom! Go check out the clip of Opening Night featuring our man if you haven't seen it already. Not before you leave me a review to let me know if you want me to keep going on this story! Thanks!
Ryan Gosling by LadyX
Author's Notes:
Thank you so much for the many reviews I got for the last chapter, it was really heartening to see that people are still enjoying this story. Also, thanks a million to elle-miranda who always loves everything I write!

“Miss Laura!”


Josh yells loudly as he hops off the ladder of the treehouse and turns to run toward where his parents and Kyra’s mom are sitting, shucking ears of corn from three large burlap sacks on the grass near them.


“Miss Laura!” He yells again as he runs across the grassy yard, getting their attention this time.


Instantly they can tell something is wrong by the tone of his voice.


“What is it, Josh?” Laura asks as she stands quickly, wiping her hands on her pants.


“Kyra...she’s all red and she can’t breathe,” he says catching his breath and pointing toward the treehouse nestled in a large oak tree toward the back of the property.


Laura nods quickly. “Did she eat something?” At the boy’s quick nod she starts running toward the tree house yelling over her shoulder at his Mom who had already started running toward Kyra’s house. “Kitchen drawer next to the stove!”


Josh watches as his Dad also runs, but toward their house. He hears the sound of the screen door slamming shut and Josh is alone. He feels unsure of what to do; all of the adults having dispersed so quickly. He, Kyra and a few other neighborhood kids had been playing in the treehouse waiting for the annual neighbourhood corn boil, when one of the kids had offered them some homemade cookies. The cookies were delicious but shortly after taking a few bites, Kyra had started coughing and her voice had gotten all raspy. She’d started scratching at her throat and her face had gotten all red. Instantly he’d known something was wrong and had run down the ladder to get an adult.


“Did you call?” Laura’s voice startles him back to reality when he sees her running toward him, holding Kyra close to her, her small body dangling from her arms


“I did. They’re on their way,”  his Dad answers the question that had been addressed to him as he kneels down onto the thick grass next to where Laura is kneeling above an almost unconscious Kyra.


Kyra is making a choking sound and her eyes are rolled up in her head. It’s terrifying and Josh stays rooted to the spot. He feels like he’s watching things from above instead of beside them. Like the whole world is put on mute as he continues watching powerless as his best friend’s skin turns darker and darker. Surely Laura, a nurse, can save Kyra right?


Suddenly he hears the sound of a siren coming closer and closer and he knows that they are coming to help Kyra. And then he’s being brushed aside as he sees his own mother kneel to the ground as well. She hands Laura a long, thin piece of plastic that almost looks like a pen and he watches as Laura unclips an orange cap before she jams the pen into Kyra’s thigh. He recoils as Kyra’s eyes flutter open and her little body tenses up.  That pen must have been a needle, he thinks as his stomach rolls over and he suddenly feels weak.


He doesn’t have time to say anything before he is brushed aside again, this time by two large men dressed in uniforms he quickly recognizes as paramedics. They’ll help Kyra, they have to, she’s his best friend.


“She’ll be fine, Dear,” said a soothing voice and JC looked up to see a motherly looking nurse checking the IV bags hanging by Kyra’s hospital bed. He hadn’t heard her come in, he’d been lost in his thoughts remembering the last time he’d seen Kyra have an allergic reaction to peanuts. It had been horrifying then to watch everything from afar, but it had been even more horrifying this time when he’d been the one to have to act.


He’d been lucky to find the Epi-pen buried at the bottom of her purse which had been hanging off one of the kitchen chairs. He’d figured she still carried one with her everywhere she went so he’d beelined for the purse the moment he’d settled her on the kitchen floor. He’d pawed through it madly for only a few seconds before he’d upended the bag, strewing all of her belongings over the kitchen floor in search of the damn thing. He’d felt only relief when his fingers had wrapped around the thin plastic cylinder and had run back to Kyra who was still gasping for breath. He hadn’t even had time to think before he’d pulled off the top cap and then jammed it into her thigh, knowing that the thick needle would penetrate her jeans easily. She’d cried out and he’d thrown the now used needle as far away from him as he could before he’d reached into his jeans and pulled out his phone to call 911.


“She’ll be really tired and achy for a few days, but she’ll come out alright. You saved her life,” she said, even though he hadn’t reacted to her first statement.


He looked up at her and smiled sadly. “Thanks,” he said softly and looked down at Kyra’s IV free hand clutched in his.


The nurse came back around the bed and patted his shoulder gently. “You make a really cute couple you know?”


He didn’t correct her, didn’t feel like he had to. “Thanks,” he repeated and rubbed the top of her hand with the pad of his thumb gently.


The nurse squeezed his shoulder and walked out of the ER observation room as soundlessly as she’d come in. He sighed and ran his free hand over his face; it was early morning now and he hadn’t slept a wink since they’d brought her to the hospital. Thankfully she was really going to be fine, but he still felt guilty as hell. He should have known to ask when he’d ordered the food if they used any kind of peanut products, but he hadn’t. He’d been out of practice after years of not thinking about her allergy.


He still remembered visiting her in the hospital after that time in the treehouse and how sick she’d looked in the big hospital bed with wires and tubes coming out of her. Laura and his mother had explained to him that Kyra was allergic to anything that had peanuts in it and that it was really dangerous for her to eat them. He’d remembered them both telling him before that it was important that Kyra asked an adult before she ate anything but he’d forgotten about it, not thinking that sneaking a few cookies before dinner would be such a problem. From then on though, he’d been diligent at making sure she followed the rules, after all he was older than her and it was his job to make sure she was okay.


Always had been, always would be.


“Hey,” she said in a very rough voice and he looked up to find her looking at him. It pained him to see the red veins in her eyes from having had breathing trouble earlier. But he was just happy that she was looking at him again.


“Hi Sleepy Head,” he said trying to take the shake out of his voice which had been present ever since she’d fallen to the floor earlier. “Nice to see you awake.”


She smiled and nodded. “Yeah. What happened?”


He shifted in his seat and leaned closer to her on the bed. “You had an allergic reaction to the fish. They must have used peanut oil to fry it.” He gripped her hand gently and added, “I’m so sorry, it’s my fault I didn’t ask-”


She shook her head quickly but then groaned at the movement. “It wasn’t. It’s my responsibility to make sure I can eat something before I do.”


He leaned forward and kissed her hand gently. “I should have thought of it too. But no matter, you’re going to be okay and someday I’ll recover from you scaring the shit out of me.”


He grinned wryly after those words and she chuckled hoarsely before coughing a few times. He quickly stood and offered her a few sips of water from a styrofoam cup on the table near her.

She smiled and nodded when she was done with the water and he placed the cup back on the table.


“When can I leave?” She asked, looking around the room and down to the IV’s on her hand.


He sat back down. “In a few hours they said. After you’ve gotten some rest and gone through that whole bag of stuff they have up there.” He pointed to an almost full IV bag hanging over her head on a rack.


She sighed. “You don’t have to stay, I’m probably just going to fall back asleep. I’m really tired for some reason.”


He shook his head. “I’m not leaving. And it’s normal, a combination of medications and because your body went through a lot just now. It needs time to repair itself. Just sleep,” he said as he brought her free hand up to his lips and kissed it gently. “I’ll still be here when you wake up,” he added but he wasn’t sure if she’d heard him because suddenly she was again fast asleep.


*


JC opened a drawer and pulled out a few folded pairs of underwear and socks. “Yeah. I know, Ma.” He rolled his eyes as she stuffed the items into his duffle bag and sat on his bed.


His Mom had called him to confirm his and Kyra’s presence for Thanksgiving that weekend and he’d mentioned what had happened a few days before with her being hospitalized for her allergic reaction. This had unleashed a litany of questions and concerns from his Mom, not to mention the ones he could hear from his Dad in the background, that made him feel like his family had suddenly turned into the Costanzas.


“I said she’s fine, Ma. She’ll be even more fine when we get to Florida. Just don’t put any nuts in the stuffing and she’ll be triply fine, okay?” He sat down on the corner of his bed and ran a hand over his face. “I don’t know about Christmas yet.”


He’d known all along that Kyra accompanying him home to Bowie for Christmas would be an uphill battle. Although he hadn’t been sure how hard it would be until he’d broached the subject and he’d realised that she hadn’t been back since the house had been sold. He realised that it must be impossible for her to separate the holidays and the loss of her Mom, but he was hoping that he may be able to start helping her cope. It had been close to ten years since the accident now and he thought that if he brought her back around, having family and friends near could help her once again remember the good things about home. The good times with him, with his family, with her Mom.  That’s what he’d hoped anyway.


“Yeah, I’m still here,” he said when his Mom asked. “I’ll let you know if she’s coming with me. We’ll see how Thanksgiving goes first.”


He listened for a few more minutes as his Mother told him about the preparations and then fielded a question that he knew he’d get, a lot, during the holidays. “No, she’s not coming as my girlfriend.” He sighed and ran a hand through his loose hair. “I don’t know what we are okay, Ma? We’re just...us.”


He thought he’d have to explain further but just then he heard the kitchen door downstairs slam shut and Kyra calling out for him. He covered the mic on his cell phone and yelled that he was upstairs. “I gotta go, Ma. I’ll see you in a few days. Yeah, love you too.”

 

He barely had time to flip his phone closed before Kyra burst through the door of his room clutching a thick envelope. Though he’d been scared that something was wrong, the look on her face indicated the total opposite: her skin was flushed, her smile was wide and though her left eye still had a blown vein (which was the only lasting result of her episode), her eyes were bright and clear.


“Guess what?” She asked moving closer to him while showing him the thick envelope.


He chuckled. “What?” He loved seeing her so pleased and alive.


“They’re buying it! The film company is buying the rights to my book. They want to make a movie and they want me to help with the screen adaptation and the script and...oh my god. I’m going to have to go back to New York. Do you think they’ll force me to include Allison?I mean, she suggested it and sort of brokered the deal for me...but I don’t really like her. I mean, she’s just made me a lot of money...like a lot of money and maybe even more if the film ends up being produced and released. Do you think that could really happen? How do things like that work-”


JC grinned and reached forward to place his hands on her shoulders. “Woah, slow down Ky.”


She finally took a break and a small, slightly hysterical giggle bubbled from her lips and he laughed. “Sorry, I’m-I’m a bit excited.”


He nodded and squeezed her shoulders gently. “I can see that. Rightfully so. Congratulations, Ky. I’m really happy for you.”


She grinned back and let herself be pulled into a hug, the thick envelope between them.


“You had no idea?” He asked against her hair and she shook her head, pulling away before they both sat on the edge of his bed.


“Not really. Allison had called me to let me know that we have received an answer back from the company and that she’d couriered it to me. When it was delivered I almost passed out when I read it!”


He laughed. “Please don’t do that again any time soon.”


She laughed and shrugged before she reached over and took his hand. “I guess I never really properly thanked you for everything you did then.”


He shook his head and looked down at their joined hands, as if embarrassed by her words. “You really don’t have to thank me.”


“But I still want to,” she said quietly and he felt her small hand brush against his cheek, making him look up. She pressed her lips sweetly against his and whispered, “Thanks.”


They smiled at each other for a few moments before she seemed to snap out of it and took a deep breath. “So, I should probably start doing some research. I wonder who they would want to play Scott? Oh my god, do you think they could get like...Freddie Prinze Jr.? Or Paul Walker? Or no, Ryan Gosling. Oh my god, Ryan Gosling.”


JC brought his hands up to his mouth theatrically. “Oh. My. God! Ryan Gosling!”


She giggled and rolled her eyes at him. He loved making her laugh like that.


“Funny.” She sighed and threw herself back onto his bed, looking up at the ceiling. “Ryan though, he’s not so little anymore. I doubt he remembers meeting me.”


JC laughed again. “He might. He was obsessed with you for a little while. Always asking me when you’d come around again, if you’d talked about him…”


He watched as Krya quickly leaned up onto her elbows to look at him skeptically. “Are you serious?”


JC smirked. Of course it was true, he’d had to fend off both Ryan and Justin’s burgeoning hormones whenever Kyra came to visit the MMC set back when they were all on the show.

 

He barely had time to wander too far back into nostalgia though before he suddenly felt a blow on his arm, rather more forceful than expected, by an agitated Kyra.


He bristled. “What the hell was that for?”


Kyra flopped back down onto the bed and crossed her arms over her chest. “For not telling me I could have been hooking up with Ryan Gosling all this time!”


He could tell that she was trying hard to keep a straight face as he rubbed his shoulder slowly and plastered an indignant look on his face. “Gosling? You’re excited about Gosling? What about me? You forget that I’m JC Chasez or what? A lot of women would be really happy to be in your position right now.”


Kyra broke and laughed, which he wasn’t sure he should be very happy about or not. But then her face turned more serious and he could see some red start creeping up the sides of her neck. He watched as she nervously licked her lower lip and his body responded instantly. The air between them had changed. It felt heavy, as if the air was permeated with little sparks that all could instantly transform into a flame at any moment. This was his chance. He knew she’d be receptive with months and years of tension and yearning culminating into the possibility of this one moment.


She moved first. The hand closest to him reached up and grabbed the side of his shirt in an invitation to lean down. When she spoke again all he could look at was her lips; smooth and soft. “And what position would that be?”


He couldn’t help the grin that spread over his own lips as he turned and leaned down toward her. He stopped less than an inch from her lips to answer, “Whichever position you want really…”


She smiled and he couldn’t take it anymore. It was like two magnets that had slowly inched toward each other until they were close enough to stick together. His lips crashed down against hers and his body molded itself to hers in a way only past lovers knew how. And though it had been years since they’d shared this kind of intimacy it instantly felt to him as if he were coming home.


*

End Notes:
...leave me a review? Hope you liked it!
Thanks(!)giving by LadyX
Author's Notes:

Updating this story due to the site crash. Hope it attracts new readers!

“So he asked you out?” Laura, Kyra's mom, asks as she reaches up into a high cabinet and pulls out a heavy ceramic mixing bowl. She sets it down on the counter. “Do you like him?”


Kyra shrugs one shoulder not looking up from her task of peeling an apple. She glides her paring knife over the last of the skin and then sets it down onto the cutting board in front of her. “I guess. He's nice...and he's sort of cute, you know.”


She probably sounds about as convincing as she feels because her Mom stays quiet until Kyra looks up to meet her mother's smirk.


“What?” She chuckles and starts slicing the apple thinly, dropping each piece into the large bowl full of other apple slices next to her on the counter.


Laura chuckles and it's her turn to shrug. “But he's not Josh, right?”


Kyra can feel her face fill colour but she tries to cover it by adding the last of the apple slices into the bowl and then walking over to the sink to rinse her hands. “I don't know what you mean.”


Laura looks at her pointedly before she starts measuring out some granulated sugar into a measuring cup. “Don't even. I'm your mother.”


Kyra shakes her head as she wipes her hands on a towel, her cheeks still flaming. “It's not like that Mum...we're not like that.”


Laura hums something intelligible and nods as she pours the sugar into the mixing bowl and motions for Kyra to hand her the flour.


Kyra hands her the flour and grabs a wire whisk from inside a drawer then shuts  it with a swing of her hips. “Listen, I know you and Karen have this messed up idea that Josh and I are going to get married or something...but it's not gonna happen,” she says sticking the whisk into the bowl and stirring its contents somewhat more moodily than she’d meant to.


Laura shakes her head and reaches forward to set her hand comfortingly on Kyra’s arm. “I'm sorry. I didn't mean to strike a nerve there.”


Kyra somewhat mollifies and Laura continues, “And yes, as two old ladies that love their children we have our own opinions as to who we’d like them to be with...but that has nothing to do with who you choose to like or not like. I think that if you like this Duke,” she looks up confirming his name and Kyra nods her head. “Then I think you should go for it. No harm in just one date.”


Kyra licks her lips and shrugs again. She walks to the refrigerator and pulls out a bag of fresh cranberries.“I know. I just...I guess you're sort of right about him not being Josh though,” she admits in a small voice.


Laura chuckles softly. “Oh, I know that. I'm just trying to be a supportive Mom here.”


Kyra rolls her eyes. Of course her Mom would know: she knows everything about her.


It’s always been just the two of them. Well at least since she’d been five years old and they’d moved to Bowie after her mother had accepted a full time nursing supervisor job there. Her father and mother had been young college students when they’d met at a party and one night had changed the course of their lives. They’d decided to go their separate ways when Kyra was only a few months old and her Mom had never hidden the fact that sometimes people weren't meant to be in love with each other or have children together.


But Kyra had never been devoid of any love for the lack of a father in her life because thankfully her mother had always had more than enough love to give her. And she hadn't grown up completely without a father figure, as her maternal grandfather had been a big part of her life until he’d passed when she was five. He’d been the one to take care of her while her Mother continued and eventually finished nursing school.


She’d been young when he’d passed, but to this day had never forgotten the smell of his cigars or the feeling of his rough and weathered lobster fisherman hands, wrapped around her tiny one during their walks along the coast spotting boats and puffins in the cool, salty air of their small hometown in Maine.


Even though at first it had been difficult for Kyra to be away from everything she’d ever known after they'd moved away, she’d adjusted quickly and ended up loving their new home. They had quickly settled into a routine just being the two of them and so had grown closer and closer as time went by. They talked about everything, spent hours together in complete silence as they read books or watched movies. Every holiday they created their own traditions like making apple cranberry pie together from scratch for Thanksgiving and green bean casserole for Christmas dinner.


“Got everything you need?” Karen asked over her shoulder from the other kitchen counter as she prepared her famous savoury stuffing for the turkey.


Kyra blinked back the tears that she hadn’t realised had formed behind her eyelids. She cleared her throat which all of a sudden felt a little tight and swallowed as she set the handwritten recipe card onto the counter in front of her.


She’d known that Karen had her Mother’s recipe for their traditional apple and cranberry pie somewhere in her recipe box but what she hadn’t been expecting was to see the very familiar, hurried scrawl unique only to her Mother on it. Strange how though it had been years since her passing, little things like that could creep up on her and catch her off guard.


She nodded quickly blinking her eyes a few more times. “I think I do. I just needed to check the recipe, I haven’t made this in years.”


“I figured it would help make this place feel like home you know? We’re not in Bowie but we love our home here and since it’s your first time, I wanted to make sure everything was perfect.”


Kyra smiled and turned. “Thank you, Karen. This means more to me than you know.”


Karen smiled and nodded as Kyra walked over to the sink and filled a large bowl with water. She set the bowl on the kitchen island facing Karen and hopped up onto the stool.


“So Josh tells me you have a beautiful home in Boston,” Karen said as she pulled a large loaf of bread from a paper bag.


Kyra smiled and nodded, squeezing two halves of lemon into the bowl of water she had set in front of her then grabbed an apple from a bag already resting there. “I love it. It’s a work in progress but the bones are there and I’m enjoying putting my personal touch on it. Josh has been a big help too.”


“He has?” Karen sounded slightly surprised and Kyra laughed.


“Yeah, he has. He’s got many more talents than we knew about apparently.”


“Well that’s nice to hear,” Karen said as she swept her hand over the counter, gathering crumbs into her other hand and then walking them over to the trash under the sink. “So, um I guess the both of you have been living together then?”


Karen sounded like she was trying to ask the question delicately but Kyra definitely heard the hope in her voice. She cleared her throat and answered, “Sort of, I guess. He’s been helping me with the house in between his projects and travels. He’s staying in one of my spare bedrooms.”


Karen hummed in response as she washed her hands at the sink. Kyra bit her lip as she tried to focus on her task of peeling the apple in her hand. It was true, he had been staying in the guest bedroom the entire time he’d been essentially living with her, but they weren’t living together, together. They weren’t a couple or anything were they? Sure, they’d kissed. And okay, they’d slept together on the last night they’d been in the house before he left for Atlanta, but they hadn’t really discussed it afterwards. They were just them, weren’t they? Nothing official, nothing set in stone.


“Hey Ma, you got any pretzels or anything? We’re hungry,” JC’s voice coming from behind her caught her off guard as he came into the kitchen from where he, his father and his brother were watching football on TV.


“There should be something in the cabinet there,” Karen answered as she pointed to one of the lower cabinets near where Kyra was standing. “But don’t ruin your supper.”


JC chuckled and walked over to where Kyra was standing at the kitchen island. “Don’t worry, I’m looking forward to all this other food too much to spoil my appetite.”


It all happened so quickly. He grinned, slipped his arm around Kyra’s waist and before she knew it his lips were against hers. It certainly wasn’t a full-on aggressive kiss, but simply an affectionate peck that conveyed a level of intimacy that she hadn’t been expecting.


Especially not in front of his mother: a mother that was certainly watching at that very moment and who had just obviously been probing as to the status of their relationship.


She didn’t pull back or break the kiss, though she certainly felt awkward about it and stiffened slightly in his embrace. He seemed not to notice though because as he pulled away he squeezed her waist affectionately before he released her and reached down into the cabinet  to grab a bag of chips. She stayed silent as she ducked her head to resume her task of peeling apples, but couldn’t help catching the look on Karen’s face as she did.


She could feel the color rising up her neck and over her cheeks as JC, totally non-plussed and apparently oblivious to what had just transpired hummed in satisfaction as he saw the apples and the bag of cranberries on the counter in front of her. “Oh man, I haven’t had that pie in forever. It’s going to be awesome.” He grinned before he walked back to the living room, but not before laying a kiss on his Mom’s cheek.


**


JC leaned back in his chair, feeling full and satisfied as he looked around the table. People were laughing and finishing up their desserts. Kyra laughed in her spot next to him and he grinned, turning to look at her in profile as she spoke with Heather, recalling something that had happened years ago when they were in high school together.


This was good. This was right. It had been years since he’d been able to relax and enjoy the holidays with his family without feeling rushed about leaving that night or the next morning. It had also been years since his family and Kyra had spent any time together and it was nice to see that it was like time had never passed. Earlier when he’d gone into the kitchen to get a snack, the sight of her and his mother getting dinner ready had sort of pulled at something within him that he hadn’t realised had still been there.


And now as he sat back with his arm lazily draped across the back of her chair he wondered why she’d been acting quiet with him ever since then. It wasn’t obvious or anything, especially not to other people, but he’d noticed it and it had caused him to pause. He wanted to ask her about it, but figured it would be easier to address it when they weren’t surrounded with people.


As if she could feel him watching her, she turned to look at him but only briefly before averting her gaze from his and then looking back down at her empty plate. He gently touched her shoulder causing her to look up at him again. When her eyes met his, he narrowed them slightly in question, wordlessly asking her if she was okay. Her slight shake of the head let him know that she didn’t want him to worry about it but he still did.


“Anyone want more coffee?” He asked as he stood, picking up the empty carafe on the table and motioning to the kitchen. When a few people nodded he then motioned to Kyra. “Mind giving me a hand?”


Kyra nodded, lifted her napkin from her lap and gently placed it on the table in front of her. She followed him into the kitchen and as soon as they were out of earshot from everyone else in the dining room he turned to speak with her. “What’s up?”


She seemed taken aback by his direct question and leaned against the kitchen island, looking uncomfortable. “I’m not sure,” she answered, eyeing him for a moment. “I’m just a little...confused I guess.”


He filled the coffee carafe with water and poured it into the coffee machine. “About what?” He asked as he pulled out a can of coffee and started pouring some into the machine.


“You kissed me,” she answered as if it was the most obvious answer in the world. “In front of your Mom.”


He flipped the on switch on the coffee maker then placed the can back on the counter before he turned to face her. “So?”


Her eyes narrowed slightly. “So? Are we doing that now?Or what?”


He narrowed his own eyes and lifted his hands in question. “What do you mean are we doing that now? I thought the other night made it pretty clear what we were now.”


“Oh, okay.” Was the only thing that she was able to say before she crossed her arms over her chest and started nibbling at her lower lip .


“Oh, okay?” He chuckled and moved closer to her, setting his hands on the counter on each side of her. “Unless I’m totally off base and wildly assumed here.”


She shook her head slowly. “Not really, I just...we hadn't talked about it. And well...in front of your Mom?” She screwed up her face a little and he could see the blush on her cheeks.


He chuckled again and slipped his arms around her waist. “Don't worry about it, I'm sure she's ecstatic.”


Kyra finally smiled and he leaned forward to kiss her gently again. He was just about to deepen the kiss when his mother popped her head into the kitchen asking if they needed help.


She seemed embarrassed to have interrupted them but he could tell she was trying to contain a large grin on her face so he couldn't help himself. “Nah Ma, you're just interrupting a makeout session with my girlfriend,” he said trying to sound angry, but the look on his face and the smirk he directed to his Mom over Kyra's shoulder indicated otherwise.


Karen laughed while Kyra rolled her eyes and pushed him away playfully. “What?” He grinned down at Kyra while his Mom returned to the dining room.


Just as she was about to reply, the loud voice of his brother drifted through the doorway interrupting her as he yelled, “About damn time!”.

The Long Road by LadyX
Author's Notes:

 



Kyra’s eyes flutter closed as she clutches her journal against her chest. The wall behind her feels cool against her back and she welcomes the sensation, having been feeling slightly feverish these last few hours. She’s not getting ill; it’s just him. She’s been trying to fight it all week, but every day it’s getting harder and harder.


Thankfully she’s returning to the States on a flight early tomorrow morning and she’ll no longer have to hide how color fills her cheeks and creeps up her neck when she watches him for too long or too closely. They’ve been living in close quarters for the last week during her visit to Germany and though at first she’d been hesitant to take the trip, she’s now glad that she did. She knows she hasn’t been dealing with her mother’s death in the most healthy of ways, disappearing into her novels and studies by choosing to strive for the best grade, or to enter into a fantasy world where someone other than her hurts. The poker face she’s developed over the last year seems to be working because she doubts anyone else knows how heavy everything feels inside of her. How each time she smiles or laughs, she feels guilty about it. Or how she wonders if she’ll ever truly feel happy again.


But he’s not fooled. He knows. And he helps. When she’s with him she doesn’t have to explain anything. He constantly tells her that time will heal and that with each passing day she’ll eventually start to feel a little bit lighter. Some days she believes him and the knot in her throat loosens a little more. He’s her comfort; her attachment to home, her tether to memories that once were filled with laughter and sunshine.


This last week has been the best in her recent memory.  When he’d first suggested she visit him during her spring break, she’d been unsure if she’d wanted to travel all the way to Germany only for a few days but it had been months since they’d spent any time together in person and she sincerely missed being close to him.


The moment she’d rounded the corner at the airport baggage claim and seen him, she’d instantly conceded that the hours of travel had all been absolutely worth it.He’d looked mostly the same as when she’d seen him last, though his hair had thankfully grown out more and he’d seemed to have gained even more muscle mass. One thing that definitely hadn’t changed though were his eyes, as they’d remained as unapologetically blue and utterly knowing as ever. She’d instantly felt her poker face slip away and her true self reemerge the moment his arms had wrapped around her and he’d told her how happy he was that she’d come.


They’ve spent almost every moment together since then as she’d tagged along to his different rehearsals and interviews. She’s come to enjoy the small house near the record company office that the boys are staying in, with its tight living quarters and worn wooden floors. The lack of space doesn’t seem to bother them much as they enjoy each other’s company. And although she really does like all of the guys, she’s glad that she and Josh have their own space to retreat to at night. The room isn’t  much more than a glorified closet but it’s quiet and since it’s so small, he doesn’t have to share. So far, they’ve spent their nights talking and laughing together until one or both of them drifted off only to awaken to another day full of plans.


But now as she sits in that quiet room she thinks about how tonight will be different, how the only plans for tomorrow include her getting on a plane and returning to her own cramped room in her college dorm. How tonight will be the last night he’ll physically be near her for possibly many more months...and she’s not sure how she feels about that. There’s no point in denying that the attraction she feels towards him has been bordering out of control in the last week. The combination of their emotional connection paired with the now physical proximity has her reevaluating all of the reasons why she needs him. Because she does. As much as she tries to deny it at times, she needs him. What bothers her the most is that she’s never been able to figure out exactly how she needs him and that scares her. And though they usually are able to talk to each other about anything and everything, she doesn’t know how to talk about this. So she writes: she writes it in her journal, she writes it in her stories and uses that pent up emotions as fuel for her compositions. Maybe someday after writing it out in so many ways, she’ll figure out the right words to use to tell him exactly how she needs him and how much he means to her.


And sex always makes things more complicated, everyone knows that. Especially when a relationship, just as theirs, isn’t necessarily clearly defined. So they can’t. They shouldn’t. Not again.


But goddamn does he make it hard. So hard that she’s starting to think that he’s doing it on purpose. Just over an hour ago she’d left early from watching their dance rehearsal, telling them that she needed to get packed and ready for her flight the next morning. But that hadn’t been entirely truthful. Yes, she does need to pack. And of course she’d wanted some quiet time to update her journal with a few final thoughts, but it was also because she just couldn’t take it anymore.


She couldn’t watch him be focused and dedicated to every single dance move anymore. She couldn’t watch his body move smoothly to the rhythm of each song. She couldn’t watch the sweat sliding down the sides of his face as every muscle in his body seemed to flex and stretch at the same time. It was torture. Plain and utter torture. And of course he’d make it worse every time he caught her watching him in the mirror, because he’d flash her a confident smirk or wink at her. And then she’d had to think about something else, anything else, because she didn’t want to make it so obvious how much she wants him. Like the coals of a campfire that were never completely been doused with water or suffocated with sand could grow hotter and hotter until they started to glow with an intense heat that lit a fire once more. She’s been feeling like those embers all week.


Brought back from her heated thoughts by the cacophony of noises floating up from downstairs, she takes a deep breath and opens her eyes. The boys are back from their rehearsal and she needs to compose herself again. Before she can prepare herself any more, she hears a soft knock on the door before it cracks open and he sticks his head into the room. When his eyes settle on her and she smiles at him, he returns the smile before opening the door wider to come inside.


“Hey. I wasn’t sure if you were taking a nap,” he says as he shuts the door behind him. He’s still dressed in a loose pair of track pants and a sleeveless black t shirt. His sneakers squeak on the old wooden floor as he drops to a sitting position on the edge of the bed.


She shakes her head and puts her journal down. “Nah, I packed up and wanted to write a few things down.”


He nods and crosses his arms. He seems uncomfortable as he glances around the room and his eyes settle on her luggage. “So you’re all ready to go then?”


She nods quietly. He smells like sweat and deodorant. It doesn’t smell bad, it just smells like him. She can see his hair is sticking out every which way, probably due to him running his hand through it dozens of times. He hasn’t had long hair in almost a year but it seems old habits die hard.


“I’m sure you’ll be happy to have your bed back. That camp bed can’t have been all that comfortable all week,” she says quietly, nodding over to the place where he’s been sleeping on the floor.


He shrugs. “Meh, I don’t really care. It was comfortable enough,” he says nonchalantly as he looks down and picks at a thread on his pants. “I’m really going to miss you,” he adds quietly then looks up and his eyes meet hers.


There are several inches of empty space between them but it feels too close. Much too close.


She shifts, lowering her knees so her legs are stretched out on the bed. “I’ll miss you too.”


He smiles sadly and she can tell by his eyes that he’s thinking about something else, but he says nothing. He simply reaches forward and the tips of his fingers connect with the skin of her neck as they follow the thin golden chain that encircles it. Her pulse quickens as his fingertips dip lower to touch the small fountain pen charm that hangs only slightly above the hem of her tank top.


“You still wear it,” he says softly and it’s not a question only a statement.


She nods, feeling like she has no breath left in her lungs. And that’s when it happens. The fire roars to life when his fingertips move lower and caress the curve of her breast over her shirt. It feels like a blur as everything moves so quickly and clothing gets discarded between heated kisses and sighs of need. Apparently he’s been holding back too, because the things he whispers in her ear and says as his tongue journeys across her skin stokes the fire ever hotter than she’d ever thought possible. Everything feels familiar but at the same time utterly different because this time there is no hesitation of their first encounter or the emotion of their second. This time it’s pure need and want. All of the tension and emotion she’s felt over the last week building and building to culminate in this one moment. It feels like she’s never experienced this before: the roughness of hurried need coupled with the tenderness of longing touch. It's all encompassing, her every thought and feeling is wrapped up in him and the feeling of him. Every breath and moan that slips from his full lips finds its way directly to her core, and every hurried movement and heated request makes her shiver even though everything about him is hot. So hot. His breath, his skin, his words. God, his words. And she thought she was the writer.


It goes on for a long time. They stop and then start again, never actually letting go of each other. It must be really late now but he's still whispering things in her ear. And he's still caressing her in ways that are less heated but more loving.  And then he's telling her that he loves her. And that he wants to be with her. And she doesn't know what to say. So she doesn't say anything and simply looks into those beautiful blue eyes. There will be time to talk about tomorrow, but that time isn't now.


**


Kyra glanced at the open map in the passenger seat of her rental car. She was familiar enough with the route but hadn't done it in over five years and had never done it alone. She returned her eyes to the road and sipped at the cooled coffee in the styrofoam cup in her hand. She grimaced at the taste and set the cup back in the cupholder where she’d just pulled it from.


When she spotted an exit sign announcing a gas station and food outlets she took that exit and pulled into the gas station. She parked her car and fished her cell phone from her purse. She’d heard it vibrate earlier but hadn't wanted to check it until she’d been off the road. She smiled when she flipped her phone open and saw a text from him saying he wished she were there.

She didn’t reply but glanced at the time on the phone. She’d been driving a little more than two hours which mean she had about that or a little less to go, depending on traffic, before she pulled up in front of the house and surprised him.


Surprised them all she guessed, including herself. She momentarily felt bad about imposing herself at the last minute on Karen, but they’d been expecting her to accompany him until very recently when she’d put her foot down and told him she wouldn’t be. He’d been at her for months, probing gently most of the time until last week when he’d become more insistent and she’d made what she’d thought would have been her final decision on the topic. He’d been hurt, but he’d said he’d understood and had made his solo travel plans to leave a few days earlier so he could spend extra time at home.


She was a coward really. Hadn’t been able to tell him no to his face and had had to tell him over the phone while she’d been in New York. She’d known that having him in front of her, his eyes boring into hers, she’d never been able to stand firm because he always knew what to say. Always knew how she was feeling even though sometimes she didn’t understand herself.


Like just yesterday, she’d still been convinced that there was no way that she was going to go home for the holidays. She still didn’t think she was ready and had been planning on returning to her home in Boston to spend them alone. He’d offered to stay, several times, but she’d been adamant that he go home. She wouldn’t hear of him staying in Boston for the holidays because of her when he hadn’t gotten to spend a proper holiday season with his family in years. She certainly wasn’t that selfish and she didn’t want him to suffer because of her reservations.


But then yesterday evening something in her mind had clicked. She’d been arguing with her agent, Allison, about one of her character’s storylines in the third book. Allison had questioned her as to whether the character would really have reacted the way she’d written based on what the readers already knew about her past. She’d found herself defending her character, trying to make her understand that someone’s past shouldn't always dictate every part of their future. Later that night in her hotel room, that conversation just wouldn’t leave her mind as she’d gone over it again and again, not to amend anything in her novel, but settling something in her mind as well as her heart.


She could go back. She could return to her past without it having to continue to define her future. It wouldn’t be easy, but she knew that she’d have him with her as he’d promised over and over again. She’d have plenty of people that loved her; that had loved her as a child, loved her as a teenager and now would continue to lover her as an adult. Moving on with her life didn’t mean that she have to leave her mother behind. She could go home and enjoy all of the things that made it home all the while embracing the reasons why it hurt. Her mother never would have wanted her to bar that entire side of her life forever. It was time for her to move forward.


So, that morning she’d rented a car and started on the road trip that would take her from New York down to Bowie. She’d been blessed that the weather was clear and crisp, with no snow squalls or rain to dampen her resolve to make it home for Christmas Eve. She didn’t have any presents or cards with her, but she thought that maybe, just maybe her decision to come home would be enough.


*




Christmas Morning by LadyX

Kyra looks up from her journal as she hears a soft knock on her bedroom door before it quietly swings open from its previously ajar position.


“Hey Ky, I’m about to leave for the night,” her mother says as she walks in wearing a pair scrubs adorned with little candy canes and Christmas hats. “You need anything before I go?” She asks as she walks into the room, her feet padding quietly against the thick carpeting.


Kyra shakes her head and smiles. “Nah, I’m good. Hopefully for you tonight won’t be as rough as last night,” she says to which her mother sighs and nods.


“Hopefully. I’m hoping that since it’s Christmas Eve people will have other things to do than to come to the emergency room for a cough,” Laura chuckles and absently straightens some lotion bottles on Kyra’s chest of drawers. “But then I’ll be off for a few days, so we’ll at least be able to spend Christmas and New Year’s together.”


Kyra nods and smiles at her mother. “I know. It’s fine Mom, I won’t be alone tonight anyway, I’ll be over at the Chasez’s.”


Laura nods. “Right. I have a salad and a plate of Christmas cookies ready in the fridge that you will bring over when you go.” She glances out of the window behind Kyra then says, “I’m surprised you’re not there already, I thought you wanted to be there when Josh got home.”


“Yeah, but he’s not th-” Kyra stops mid sentence when she also glances out the window and sees what she’d been waiting for all day; his jeep parked in the neighboring driveway. “Damn it,” she groans as she hops off her window seat and quickly rushes over to her mother to place a peck on her cheek before flying down the stairs to the kitchen backdoor. After jamming her feet into a pair of old boots, pulling on her jacket and stuffing a knitted hat over her hair she quickly makes her way out into the cold to reach the Chasez back door in record time.


She knocks as she pushes the door open, calling out his name as she toes off her boots and quickly sheds her jacket and hat. When she hears voices coming from the living room she heads toward the sound but then as if out of nowhere she walks into something solid. A pair of very familiar arms wrap themselves securely around her and she looks up already knowing who they belong to.


“Hi,” he says with a wide smile, his eyes crinkling familiarly at the corners. Have his eyes always been that blue? Has he always used that low, sexy voice when speaking to her?


“Hi,” she responds, her voice a little lower than usual. “I’ve been waiting for you to get here all day, then I get distracted for a minute and you show up.”


He chuckles and shrugs his shoulders. “I’ve only just gotten here, you didn’t miss much.”  She feels that chuckle all the way down into her toes and she suddenly feels really warm. Has he grown taller in the last two months since she’s seen him?


She clears her throat as she realises that he’s still holding her. “I um, I figured...but I really wanted to see you,” she finally says, unable to avoid looking at his lips as runs the tip of his tongue across them. Now she wishes that she’d spent a little more time getting ready.


“Oh yeah? Miss me that much?” He teases but then somewhat dismissively turns his head toward the voices coming from the living room.


She narrows her eyes for a moment but then decides to let it go as he returns his attention to her. Had he grown older all of a sudden? Had she? Had the kiss they’d shared the last time they’d been together changed anything? Everything?


With a steeling breath she reaches up with one hand and touches the tips of her fingers to his jaw. “Josh, before you leave again I think we need to ta-”


“Oh my god, JC! Is this her? This is Kyra right?”


Kyra pulls her hand away from his face and they both look over his shoulder to see a tall brunette who’d stepped out of from the living room looking at the two of them. She feels him tense for a moment then let go of her as the girl comes closer to them. He smiles at the girl but she can tell that it's forced.


“Uh, yeah. This is Kyra, you’ve met her before though,” he says sounding embarrassed.


The brunette steps forward and genially hugs Kyra, who, totally unprepared for it, sort of stays stiff in the friendly embrace. “I’m so happy to see you again, I didn’t recognize you right away.” She sets Kyra away from her and looks her up and down as if appraising her. “You’ve grown so much in the last year!”


Still unable to make her mouth form words, Kyra stands there quietly as the girl shifts away from her to wrap her arm around JC’s waist and sidle up to him. “JC talks about you all the time, I feel as if I know you. It’s like you’re just like my little sister too!” She laughs and JC seems to grow even more uncomfortable as he fidgets his fingers and then scratches the back of his head.


“His little sister?” Kyra finally finds her voice and she fakes a smile as she tries to catch JC’s now downcast eyes. “How sweet,” she says sarcastically then turns to look at the girl once more. “And you are? I’m sorry, he’s never mentioned you.”


The girl seems taken aback only slightly, her smile falters then it returns. “I’m Cam. Carmen, actually but I go by Cam. JC and I are on the show together, I think we met there before.”


Kyra can’t help the words from coming out of her mouth. “Yeah, but it was dark in the utility closet.”


A light hue of redness creeps up on Cam’s cheeks as she momentarily looked away from Kyra and down at the floor. Josh shakes his head slightly as his eyes find Kyra’s:  he’s not happy, she can tell, but she doesn’t care right now.


Before any of them can say anything else, Karen walks by interrupting the suddenly tense moment. “Kyra, sweetheart do you have the salad your mom was supposed to make? We’re about to have dinner.”


Kyra shakes her head. “Sorry, I forgot it. I’ll go get it right now.” Before anything else can be said she’s off to the back door; boots, jacket and hat back on before she beelines it back out into the cold.


The kitchen door of her house barely has time to close behind her when it opens again. “What the hell was that about?’ JC says to her back as she walks toward the fridge after quickly taking her boots off.


“What do you mean?” She asks as innocently as possible, her back still turned to him as she pulls out the large salad bowl from the fridge and sets it on the counter.


“All...that…” he stutters as if he doesn’t know how to say it.


“All that what?” She repeats as she grabs the cookies from the fridge as well and places them on the counter before shutting the refrigerator door.


“Come on Ky, you know what I mean. That wasn’t very nice,” he says crossing his arms over his chest.


She sighs dramatically and turns to face him. “It’s not like I didn’t say the truth, you really haven’t mentioned her lately.”


“Yes, I have! I told you I really liked her!”


Now it’s Kyra’s turn to cross her arms over her chest. “You never said it was official,” she says and curses herself for how petulant her voice sounds.


He blushes and clears his throat. “It’s not official, official…”


“Bringing her home for Christmas sounds pretty official to me…” She mumbles and looks away.


He sighs. “Why are you acting like this?”


Kyra shrugs, still not looking at him. He prompts her by repeating her name once more and she finally sighs, her shoulders sagging. “I don’t know...I just...I don’t know.”


He shifts uncomfortably in his untied boots. “Are you jealous or something?”


Kyra’s eyes connect with his and before she can really think of the consequences, the word “Yes,” slips from her lips.


*


JC slipped away from the crowded living room to look for Kyra who had quietly disappeared several minutes ago. He had a good idea where she’d gone and his suspicions proved to be true when he laid eyes on her sitting on the window seat in his childhood bedroom. Being the oldest, he’d been lucky enough to have the furthest bedroom down the hallway which, though slightly smaller than his brother’s or sister’s room, had the benefit of being a corner room with two windows instead of one, as well as being the room furthest away from his parent’s room. He’d spent many nights sitting on either window seat, either looking out into the backyard or looking at the side of Kyra’s house where incidentally her bedroom window faced his. This had come in handy many times as they’d been growing up; being able to communicate with hand signals and even flashlights through the shared window views. As they’d grown older he’d even caught her changing with the blinds open a few times, for which he’d come to find was another reason he’d been thankful his room was far from his parents’.


“Did you know I saw you changing a few times with the blinds open when we were growing up?” he asked teasingly as he came into the room.


She laughed softly and she looked away from the window to glance at him over her shoulder. “Did you not realise I could see you too?”


That realisation left him momentarily speechless, then he laughed. “So you did it on purpose?”


She shrugged, then a small smile spread over her lips. “Not the first time.”


He chuckled again and she turned to look out the window once more. He could tell that she was bothered. She’d been smiling and laughing all evening through dinner and the festivities, but he’d been able to tell that those smiles never completely reached her eyes.


“You okay?” he asked softly to her back as he moved forward to take a seat next to her.


She nodded as she fidgeted with a loose thread on an old throw pillow she had in her arms. “Mostly,” she answered quietly her eyes never leaving the window.


“What are you looking at?” he asked, even though he knew she was looking at her old house. He’d noticed she’d been stealing glances ever since she’d gotten there earlier that morning.


“I don’t know….just the house I guess. For some reason I keep wondering who’s living there now, you know? Is it a family that’s enjoying the house or a couple waiting to build their family or even someone looking for a quiet retirement? I don’t know, I just can’t help but wonder…maybe that’s just the writer in me…”


She trailed off and he nodded. “Probably,” he answered then unable to help himself he also looked out of the window and stared at her old house. It looked pretty much the same as it did in all of his memories, except for the now darkened inside of the house only lit by the red glow of Christmas candles adorning each windowsill.


“I asked your parents about the new neighbors and they said they’ve never really seen them. That a company comes by every so often to mow the lawn or clean the snow but that no one really seems to live there yet. Isn’t that weird? It’s been almost four years since I sold it.”


JC shrugged. “Maybe the person who bought it has other plans for the house.”


Kyra shrugged as well and he reached forward to touch her chin with his fingertips. “Now, how about we go down and kick everyone’s ass at cards then come back up here and reenact some of your teenage fantasies in my old bedroom?”


She laughed and blushed before she rolled her eyes. “Your fantasies you mean?”


He laughed too as they both stood up and took her hand in his as he headed toward the door. “Well, come to think of it, we probably had pretty similar fantasies...but I’m better at acting things out than writing about them so we’ll go with mine.”


*



The End? by LadyX

JC drops down onto his bunk with a sigh. He wishes he could just close his eyes and take a nap, but he has to call his parents. They’ve called three times in the last few days but he’s always been busy and they’ve been playing phone tag ever since. And now, since sound check just finished and he has a few minutes of free time before the show tonight he figures he might as well try to reach them. After flipping open his cell phone, he dials with his thumb as he pulls his bunk curtain closed and waits until a familiar voice answers.


“Hey Dad,” he says quietly, propping an arm onto a pillow behind his head. “How’s it goin’?”


“Fine, Son. How are you? Busy it seems?”


His heart swells a little when his Dad doesn’t sound mad at all, only happy to speak with him. Thank heavens for supportive parents.“Yeah, really busy. Always something going on, you know?”


They make small talk for a few minutes about things going on at home, on his tour, with the family. And then as much as he loves his father he’s suddenly growing more and more tired. The abnormal quiet of the usually rambunctious bus, the feel of the soft mattress of his bunk underneath him and the warmth of the air trapped behind the curtain of his bunk all meld together to create the perfect combination for his exhausted body to start drifting off. But then, his Dad says Kyra’s name and all of a sudden it feels like a jolt to his system. His eyes pop open and his body tenses slightly.


He clears his throat and apologizes, “Sorry, what was that?” He blinks his eyes forcefully a few times, begging them to cooperate with the pace of his thoughts.


“Kyra. She’s here. Did you want to talk to her?”


It’s like his mouth has momentarily forgotten how to form words and all he can utter is a jumble of sounds and half sentences. “What? Um, uh. Yeah. Sure. What is she...um, what is she doing there?”


He can hear some shuffling in the background, a few muffled words and then his Dad is back on the line. His heart drops a little and he realises that maybe he had been hoping that it would be her voice on the other side.


He recovers quickly but doesn’t have the chance to say anything before his Dad says, “I guess she just went into the shower. Anyway, yeah, she’s here to sign papers to renew the realtor’s contract for the house.”


JC frowns. “What house? Her house? She’s selling it?”


“Well, yeah. She says she doesn’t figure she’ll move back here after college. It’s too big of a house when she’s all alone, and it’s a big expense to keep even when it’s empty. I don’t blame her for wanting to sell it and use the money to pay for her studies. Though I figure she might have to move back if she doesn’t sell it before she graduates from school, you know?”


“Yeah,” JC says quietly as he shifts in his bunk. There’s a weird, tight feeling in his chest and he’s not too sure why. “Has there not been any interest in the house?”


“A few visits here and there over the last couple of years. I try to keep the outside looking nice, you know? Mow the lawn in the summer, shovel in the winter. But the market isn’t so hot right now, so I don’t know. It’s all empty and everything, so it would be a fast move in for whoever buys it. That’s why she’s staying here overnight, she’ll head back to college tomorrow. Kinda weird to see her hanging about the house again, sleeping in your old room no less,” he chuckles.


JC chuckles too, but it’s forced because that pressure in his chest has turned into a knot at the bottom of his throat. “Yeah, must be.”


A moment later, the sound of the tour bus door opening followed by someone calling out his name confirms to him that his alone time is up. He clears his dry throat again.


“Hey Dad, I gotta go. Tell Mom I love her. I’ll call again soon.”


After listening to his Dad’s goodbye and his promise to let Kyra know he had called, JC flips his phone closed and lets it drop onto his chest. For a moment he simply closes his eyes and lets his racing heart start to slow. But then his racing thoughts start to catch up and the pressure around his chest intensifies. He’s not sure why he’s reacting this way but it feels like everything is hitting him at once; Kyra’s toothy smile as she laughs at something he says, the fluttering of her eyelids as he leans in to kiss her for the first time, her pleading eyes begging him not to confirm that her mother has died, her tear stained face as she looks back at him in anger telling him she doesn’t know who he is anymore. His fingertips start to tingle and her face in his mind’s eye is getting obscured by spots of bright light and suddenly he can’t breathe.


“Hey C, you in there?”


The close up voice of someone right beside his closed bunk curtain startles him back to reality and he gets a big gulp of strangled air. He sits up quickly, almost banging his head on the top bunk as his chest rises and falls quickly. It’s like he’s just run a marathon, but really he’s been absolutely still.


“C? You okay in there?”


JC coughs, trying to cover the quiver in his voice as he brings a shaky hand up to the curtain partition and pulls it slightly ajar. “Yeah….yeah, man. Just fell asleep,” he says as loudly and calmly as he can. “I’ll be right out.”


As he listens to the heavy steps of security heading back out of the bus he takes a moment to take a few more deep breaths. The first couple are still a bit shaky but as he continues they get more and more even and he feels his heart rate start to settle once again. Then, as he pulls apart his curtain more widely and swings his legs off of the bunk, he can’t help wonder what the hell he’s going to say if she actually does call him back.


**


The smell of sweet, rich cinnamon rolls baking in the oven combined with the earthy, briny scent of sizzling bacon wafted from the kitchen into the lively Chasez living room on Christmas morning. Ripped pieces of festive wrapping paper and open cardboard boxes littered the worn hardwood floor as pyjama clad family members laughed and talked over the streaming sounds of Bing Crosby still dreaming of a white Christmas. Kyra, who was seated on the stuffed loveseat nearest to the window, quietly sipped at the cup of coffee she clutched in her hand as her eyes darted back and forth between the window and the lit Christmas tree not far from her in the corner of the room.


What a beautiful Christmas morning this was, she thought as her eyes flickered again to the window where very large, fluffy snowflakes were slowly drifting down from a cloudy winter sky blanketing the yard and nearby houses with a thin coating of white. She could still see the now faded glow of Christmas candles on the window sills of her old house but could not tell if a Christmas tree had been erected in the large bay window at the front where she and her mother used to place theirs.


It had been both harder and easier to be home during the holidays for the first time since her mother had passed. Harder in the sense that every time she was anywhere near a window, her eyes would automatically glance over for at least a moment to the familiar structure next door. Harder in the sense that being in the Chasez home sometimes made her feel like everything used to be like it was before. That her mother would be walking in through the kitchen back door any moment, wearing a horrid Christmas sweater while balancing plates of cookies, pies and cakes for everyone to share. That walking into the kitchen she would find Karen and her mother laughing as they drank wine and prepared the large family meal that was always scheduled for 4pm sharp every Christmas evening since she was four years old.


But it was easier for much of the same reasons. Being with the Chasez family made her feel like she was home again. She was the prodigal daughter that had finally found her way back and everyone was so excited that she had come. Old stories and jokes were shared around the crowded kitchen table while quiet encouragements and reminiscences were fondly remembered in front of the warm fireplace at night.


And JC.


He’d been everything she could have wished for during this time. He’d been patient. So patient with her through this entire thing and she would be hard pressed to find the words to express just how all of this was making her feel.


“Ky,” his voice suddenly broke into her thoughts. “You okay?”


She blinked her eyes a few times and turned to look at him sitting next to her on the loveseat. “Yeah,” she smiled. “I’m good. Are you?”


He smiled and her heart skipped a little. Funny how twenty years later, after all they’d been through, he could still do that to her. He nodded but then seemed to mull something over in his head before he set his mug on the coffee table in front of them. He reached for hers and placed it next to his before he stood.


“Come with me,” he said as he stretched out his hand to her.


She narrowed her eyes and unfolded herself from her seat as she took his hand. She would let him take her anywhere, but she still was a bit weary due to the apparently sudden decision on his part. Still, she let him pull her through the living room dodging piles of wrapping paper and unwrapped gifts.


“Where are we going?”


He ignored the question as he pulled her into the small kitchen. The air seemed colder here and the voices and noises from the living room grew softer. He stopped them near the back door and let go of her hand, suddenly seeming nervous.


“I uh...well, I…” he stammered before clearing his throat and running a hand quickly through his untidy chestnut curls. “Just hear me out okay?”


Kyra’s eyes narrowed in question once more but she didn’t say anything so he continued.


“I didn’t think you were coming, so your present is back at the house in Boston-”


“You seriously didn’t have to get me anything,” she interrupted. “I don’t even have your present here either, I wasn’t-”


He shook his head and waved away her concern, interrupting her as well. “I don’t need anything. You being here with me is about as good a present as anyone could have ever given to me. I just...um, well here.”


He walked over to the kitchen back door and reached up to the crowded row of coat hooks quickly pulling off her jacket and scarf. “Here, put this on.”


Though she accepted the jacket and scarf, she felt like her heart was going to squeeze out of her chest. The way he could say things like that without even pausing or realising how much they meant to her just seemed to always reinforce how beautiful his soul was.


She blinked again as he stuffed a beanie on top of his head. “Where are we going? I’m not really dressed,” she added motioning to her well broken-in pyjama pants and old faded U of Ohio t-shirt.


He shook his head as he leaned down and tossed her boots toward her feet before sliding his feet into his own. “Just get dressed. You look perfect to me.”


The moment her jacket was on and her feet had slipped into her boots he was pulling her once more, this time out of the kitchen door, across the snowy back deck and steps and finally out toward the backyard. The air was humid with a cold that went right through her clothing and sidled itself against her bones. When he suddenly stopped walking he turned to her and she watched as he seemed to become really uncomfortable once again. He readjusted the beanie on his head needlessly and stuffed his hands into his jacket pockets.


“So uh, I wasn’t really planning on doing all this now…” he trailed off, his eyes lowering to the tips of his snow covered boots. “But I think you deserve to know and well...I just can’t keep it from you anymore.”


For a moment Kyra’s heart dropped and her eyes settled on the top of his head since he’d shielded his face from hers. She’d been weary but half amused with his hare brained idea until now when she realised that he might have been intending to drop a bomb on her.


Why the hell would he do this on Christmas day of all days? Now? Just when she was starting to feel normal? Just when she had started to wade through her past memories and weave them into the forefront of her present? My gosh, had he cheated? Again? Was he going back to the JC that had shattered her entire being and torpedoed her heart back in that tiny hotel room almost five years ago? Why had she opened herself up to him again?


Her racing thoughts must have been evident on her face because he stepped forward and cupped her face gently with his large hand. He forced her to look into his eyes and said, “It’s not bad, sweetheart. Just...follow me.”


He released her face and grabbed her hand again to lead her across the small area that separated the Chasez property with hers. As he pulled her up the side steps of her old house she started trying to keep him from pulling her along, instead she tried to pull him back toward her.


“What the hell are you doing?” She asked in a panicked voice, her eyes darting around the property half expecting someone to pop out from nowhere to yell at them.


He said nothing but released her hand and climbed up the three steps by himself. She was just about to whisper-yell at him again when she noticed him stick a hand into his pocket. Then, everything seemed to fall into place and she grew absolutely silent and still. She watched with wide eyes as he pulled out a key ring holding two golden keys from his pocket and easily slid one of them into the lock on the door. His eyes found hers again as he turned and looked at her.


“I want to explain myself,” he started in a quiet voice. “But it’s cold and I don’t want to do it over there,” he added as he motioned with his head over to his parents’ house. “Please come in?”


She blinked a few times and stood there as he watched her with a sheepish look on his face. She could tell by his expression that he wasn’t really sure how she was going to react. Hell, she didn’t even really know how to react herself. Her entire body seemed to buzz with shock and her boots suddenly seemed to be filled with lead.


She continued to stand still, her eyes wide and her mouth seemingly glued together until he repeated his request. “Ky, please come in.” This time he reached out his hand to her and again, her body seemed to act on its own. She always followed him, would always follow him.


Her leaden feet clumsily climbed up the steps and before she knew it his hand was pressing the small of her back forward. The moment she stepped into the house the whole room seemed to spin but she forced her eyes to settle on what she knew was a stationary object. After taking a deep breath her vision settled and she took it all in.


The inside of the house looked the same as when she had left it last. The kitchen was empty but for the cabinets, appliances and the lone kitchen island in front of the sink. She felt JC move away from her and watched as he toed off his boots before walking over to the island and pulling out one of the two custom sized stools from underneath the counter.


Then, her eyes started to wander around the house; to the right where a flight of carpeted stairs led down to the basement where the wood stove and a small den used to be; to the left down the hall to the living room where she used to watch TV and where the stairs to the upstairs bedrooms was located. When her eyes settled once more on a silent JC who was patiently watching her from his perch on the stool she lifted her brows.


“Chordea Corp, that was you?” She asked in a quiet voice, her lips barely moving. She already knew the answer. She had always remembered the name of the corporation that had bought her house, having found it strange at the time of the transaction.


He adjusted the beanie on his head nervously again and nodded. “Yeah.”


She nodded and slowly toed off her own now dripping boots. Her socked feet touched the cold ceramic of the kitchen floor and it propelled her to walk forward. When he seemed to want to stand up she shook her head and said, “I need a few minutes.”


He nodded quietly and leaned back against the counter. She felt his eyes on her back as she walked past him and down the hallway, her fingertips gently gliding along the painted wall. When her feet felt the plush carpeting of the living room she continued across the room to the stairs leading up to the second floor. Her fingers continued to follow a path beside her on the wall as she ascended slowly, her fingertips encountering the rough edges of long empty nail holes from picture frames that used to hang there. She walked down the hallway and peered into the empty bathroom and then stopped at the door which used to be her mother’s bedroom.


Although it was empty now she could still picture the bed up against the window at the back of the room with its colourful duvet cover and mismatched pillows; the reading chair in the corner that never held anything but work scrubs and worn sneakers; a dresser that used to be covered in framed pictures of herself at different ages and a well used stethoscope. When she finally moved away and walked through the next door on the right. It was like second nature for her feet to take her across the carpeted room to the window at the far side of the room. She sat down on the padded window seat her mother had sewn in a happy pattern that matched the colour on the walls.


She pulled her legs up to her chest and rested her chin on her knees as she looked around her empty bedroom. It was all sinking in and she didn’t really know how to feel at this point. She hadn’t been back inside the house since she had left it a few days after her mother’s funeral. She had hastily packed everything of importance into boxes which she had put into a storage facility in town. A lof the the furniture had gone to Heather, JC’s sister, who had recently moved into an apartment and had gladly accepted the free stuff. Whatever hadn’t gone to the Chasez’s she’d arranged to have an estate appraiser come and take everything for an agreed price. And then, she had locked the door for the last time and handed over the keys to the realtor.


Now, years later she had realised that it may have been a rash decision to close everything off and distance herself from the place where she once loved, fell in love and felt safe. Dealing, or rather not dealing, with the death of her mother on the grander scale of things had caused her some issues with trust and anxiety which she still dealt with today. And at times, she had mused that maybe going back home may have helped with that, but then the house had sold and she had lost her chance.


And now she had it.


Because of him.


She bit her lip and as if he’d read her mind, she turned at the sound of someone quietly approaching her door from down the hall. Seconds later his sheepish face came into view again and he leaned against the door jamb of her bedroom. She could tell that he was unsure if he was welcome at this point, if she was angry at him.


To be honest she probably should have been angry with him, at least a little bit. He had gone behind her back and done this. But at the same time….


She sighed then asked quietly, “Why?”


He shrugged his shoulders as his fingertips worried the edge of his jacket on one side. “I don’t know. I just...I did it. We hadn’t spoken in over a year. I was over being an asshole and had been trying to reach out to you for a while--no don’t, I deserved it.” He said as he rightfully deducted that she had been about to apologize.


He continued, “I didn’t know what to do anymore. And then while I was on tour I called my parents and Dad mentioned that you were at our house to sign realtor papers. He said that you were having a hard time selling it…”


He shrugged and sort of faltered. She felt bad for him and motioned him over to sit beside her on the window seat. He complied and sat next to her before he continued, apparently emboldened by her accepting his presence.


“I don’t know...it just sort of hit me. That night during the show I was off, all I could think about was you and everything that happened. All I wanted to do was tell you I was sorry and try to make it up to you...but I couldn’t figure out how. And then that thing with the house...it just sort of fell into place for me you know? So after the show I called my lawyers and asked them to contact the realtor company and make an offer. Whatever the full price was, I was going to pay it. The only thing I made sure was that you wouldn’t know, that no one would know, not even my parents. Because whatever had happened between us I knew...I knew that if you knew it was me making the offer, you never would have taken it.”


He chuckled a bit and a small smile formed on her lips.


“So I made the offer through my corporation and it went through. I don’t know...I just felt that well, if this could in any way make your life easier...if I could just make sure you were okay…”


He shook his head and looked away.


“I just wanted you to be able to do whatever felt right eventually. Say goodbye to the house, or move back in...whatever you wanted. I didn’t want you to have to be pressured into making any decisions just because of finances or emotions that were still so fresh to you.”


He seemed to run out of things to say so he stopped talking. She reached over to touch his arm gently and he looked up at her again.


“I...um, I’m not sure what to say honestly…” She said quietly and it was true. She wasn't sure she would be able to process all of this for another little while. But one thing she did know was that she wasn’t angry with him and that she loved him. So much.


“I love you,” she said to him her eyes meeting his.


He smiled. “I know. I love you too.”


She always had. And she had a feeling she always would. She wasn’t sure where things would lead now, what would happen to her, to them, to the house...but what she knew for sure was that he had just handed her the pen that would enable her to now turn the page and eventually, finally finish the book.


**


End Notes:
Hope you enjoyed reading (or re-reading) this story!
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