She's a cutie. Are you sure she's Chris's?” Lance teased as he held the newborn who was sound asleep, swaddled up like a burrito. “She has your ears and nose, Kirkpatrick.” He smiled at his friend who was watching him carefully. He looked at the baby again and smiled, remembering when Olivia was born. As proud as he was of Liam, a little girl was something else entirely. “You're in so much trouble, man.”

“You got two more minutes before I'm taking my baby back,” Chris told Lance, looking over his shoulder at his daughter. “She is kinda cute though, huh? I tried to tell Mel not to drink the funny koolaid. See where we ended up...” he smiled at his wife who was talking with Addy.

Melissa looked over at Chris and raised an eyebrow. “I hardly think it was all my fault,” she told him, laying back on the hospital pillows. “You seem to think you carried a baby for almost nine months and then had a c-section after hours of labor. All you did was make the koolaid.”

“I'm not sure I need to hear this conversation,” Addy said with a chuckle. “Chris, I'm amazed you didn't pass out. Lance and I had a bet going...and well..I lost.” She smiled at him and got up and went over to Lance and looked at him. “Give me that baby,” she said. “You and Chris have hogged her since we came in.”

Lance shrugged a little. “You lost but how bad is it? You have to take my car to get it detailed. That's so hard.”

“Your car is disgusting. And Liam and Olivia don't even ride in your car so it can't be them.” Adeline carefully took the baby from her husband. “Oh Hads..you poor thing,” she cooed, holding her close, enjoying the feel of a newborn. “Between your Daddy and uncles, I'm afraid for you.”

Chris rolled his eyes as he went over to his wife's bed and sat down next to her, leaning down to kiss her forehead. “You did great, Weston. I know I told you that already,” he said softly, smiling at her. “You look exhausted, baby.” He wound his fingers through hers as she leaned on him and nodded.

“The medication is kicking in again. I could sleep for a few hours,” Melissa admitted to him, sighing. “And my name's not Weston, Kirkpatrick.” She loved it when he teased her like that. “We made a beautiful baby, Christopher Alan.”

“We did. Our little Hadley Nicole,” he said, pulling his wife's hand up to kiss her knuckles, watching her doze off after thanking Lance and Addy for coming to see them.

Lance caught the moment and smiled as he looked at the baby in Addy's arms. “We won't get any work out of Chris now,” he commented as his wife handed the newborn off to Chris who had taken the seat Lance had vacated. “Congratulations again. Let us know when you're home so we can bring some meals over or give you a chance to get a shower or a nap.”

Chris chuckled and shook his head a little. “You were right you know,” he told Lance, rocking Hadley gently back and forth. “I needed to get me one of these.” He told his friends goodbye, enjoying the quiet moment. His family and Melissa's were either down in the cafeteria or at the hotel next to the hospital getting some sleep. It had been a very long night and was now well into the next day since he'd called them to say that they were going to the hospital. Chris wasn't sure himself how he was still going.

A small yawn made him smile. Hadley had a head full of blonde hair and tiny fingers with tinier little fingernails. It was safe to say that he was in love. He'd loved feeling their daughter kick when Melissa was pregnant, singing or talking to her stomach. Now he was holding her close, watching her sleep. “I'm in so much trouble, Hads. You look so much like your Momma...” he kissed her softly, knowing life would never be the same again.

Chris laid in bed next to Melissa, glancing at the clock. He smiled and slid a hand up his wife's shirt, her skin soft as he found a breast and kneaded it gently. Getting a soft moan out of her, he kept going and kissed the back of her neck. “Hi, baby.”

“Mmmm, hi,” Melissa responded softly, rolling over to face Chris. She smiled at him, running a hand over his beard that had grown in. “You kinda look like that one guy...you know. He sings in some boy band.” Kissing him softly, her fingers found their way to run through his hair and pulled at it, getting a moan in return.

“Oh really? Which one would that be? Backstreet Boys?” Chris teased, kissing down Melissa's collarbone as his hand that had been in her shirt was still there, his fingers tugging on a nipple. “O-Town? One Direction...”

“God..Chris,” Melissa sucked in a breath when his mouth found where his hand had been. “Who cares if you're him or not,” she smirked as he looked up at her. “You better hurry, Kirkpatrick.”

With one child, finding a chance to have some private time wasn't that hard. When their second daughter Kenna Riley was born, time got shorter. It got manageable once all of them got more sleep and things somewhat got back to a normal craziness in the house. Then Melissa announced she was pregnant for the third time when Hadley was four and Kenna was three. Cameron Christopher Kirkpatrick arrived, much to the delight and then displeasure to his older sisters. He was Chris' doppelganger and into everything. Now two years old, Cam was the reason all of the cabinets had locks on them and Chris kept his music room locked after one of his favorite guitars got a 'makeover' with some of Melissa's make up. In any case, time for sex in a household with three smallish children came when it could happen.

“Fuck,” Chris murmured when his wife's hand wrapped around his cock and stroked him from base to tip. “Come on, Mel,” he whispered in her ear, his tongue flicking her earlobe, groaning when she got faster. She was naked beneath him and he was ready, moving to where he could enter her. Chris kissed her hard on the lips, his tongue slipping into her mouth as he kept going. “So good,” he said, one of his hands running through his wife's hair after stroking her cheek, moving in and out of her.

“Yes..better than good,” Melissa told Chris, kneading his shoulders, her fingernails digging into his back. “Keep going, faster. Harder.” She let out a whimper when she felt her husband's thumb rub her clit, causing her to thrust a little harder in time with him. “Fuck. Christopher.”

“Yeah?” he smiled, loving the look he was getting. “You like that?” Chris nipped her neck and half growled in her ear. “That's it. You know what you want.” He moaned loudly when he was rewarded with her teeth on his chest, knowing it would leave a slight mark.

It wasn't until they were laying together in a heap of limbs and bedsheets trying to breathe did they hear noises at the door.

“Daddy, can we watch cartoons on the big tv?” Kenna asked through the door.

Chris lifted his head up and cleared his throat, hoping he sounded somewhat normal. “Sure, baby. Momma and I will be out in a few minutes. What are Hads and Cameron doing?”

“Sissy's tryin' to find Fairly Odd Parents. We want Chip Skylark. Cam is here.” They heard a bang on the door and the knob turned with a loud yell of 'Mama' with no success of opening the master bedroom.

Melissa's quiet laughter met his ears and he pulled her close and goosed her ribs. “Totally your fault,” he whispered after answering , kissing her once more before getting up. “What time is Hadley's ball game?” he asked, reaching for his underwear and shorts.

“11:30,” Melissa answered, slowly getting out of bed and finding her panties and some clothes to put on before going to fix breakfast. “What time were you riding this afternoon?” she asked, knowing he had plans to meet up with some buddies to ride motorcycles for a few hours.

“Around three,” Chris told her, pulling her to him once more. “I love you,” he said, kissing her.

“I love you too,” she replied, wrapping her arms around him for a moment. Melissa smiled when she heard Cam yell for her. “I'm being paged by my other favorite man. Nice shirt,” she added, grinning at his Steelers t-shirt.

“I finally got it back after I did the laundry. For some reason some woman thought it was hers.” Chris chuckled as they opened the door to find Cameron sitting in the hallway with a pretend microphone. “Hey killer. You singing?” he asked, picking up his son and making a face. “Dear sweet baby Jesus. Sometimes I think you're related to Joey...Let's go change you, bucko.” They were working on potty training but Cam wore a diaper at night as he carried his son to his room.

“Daddy!” Kenna and Hadley hollered at him and pointed to the television, where Chip Skylark was singing about his “Shiny Teeth & Me”.

“Let me guess, your mama recorded it,” he said, pausing as they both smiled and nodded. “Mel, our kids have blackmail on me!” he yelled before going on.

“I have blackmail on you too. It's called the year 2000 with those plastic clothes,” she hollered back with a grin as Chris didn't answer. She loved their house, that the kitchen and living room were open so she could enjoy the kids and still cook and that it was one level so they didn't have to worry about stairs. They'd bought the house five years ago, wanting more room. It was close to Lance and Addy, making things easy for both families to get together often.

“Momma can we have rabbits?” Hadley asked.

“And bacon?” Kenna added.

“Sure,” she said, getting out the pancake mix and the cookie cutters that looked like rabbits. The girls and Cam loved them and it was a fun way to make breakfast. “You want any eggs?” she asked, watching them giggle at the cartoon that was on after saying yes.

Hadley was her made over, while Kenna was their surprise. Dark blonde hair with Chris' brown eyes. They were close, but different personalities. Hadley was athletic and sporty, enjoying softball and being outside while Kenna liked books. Both girls took dance class, keeping the family busy. Melissa stayed at home, still catering for a few select events that Chris was a part of as host or special guest, sometimes asked by their friends for a private party. She loved getting out of the house at times, but was happy with her life. She and Chris made time for dates and mini vacations for themselves as well as a couple of family vacations a year.

“Much better,” Chris said, coming into the living room with Cameron running into the kitchen to his mother. “Morning babies,” he said, hugging and kissing his daughters as they snuggled on him and watched television. “What's Momma making for breakfast?” he asked, hearing Cam babble to Melissa.

“Rabbits an' eggs an' bacon,” Kenna said, flopping over on his lap. “Daddy, can I go with you on your ride?” she asked, giving him a pout.

“Kenniebear, you already know the answer. We're all going to Had's game and probably out to eat and then I'm coming home and riding my motorcycle. I'll only be gone a few hours.” Chris smiled at her and goosed her ribs, getting a giggle.

“Will you sing us a song?” Hadley asked, bored with tv. “One like Mom likes.”

“Gee, Hads, that's such a broad spectrum of songs,” Chris said, sitting up.

“I heard that,” Melissa said, putting the pancakes in the oven to keep them warm. “You have five minutes until breakfast is ready.” She'd already put Cameron in his high chair and was feeding him his pancake and egg. “Sing them an old NSYNC song.”

Chris thought for a moment. “Lying in your arms, so close together, didn't know just what I had. Now I toss and turn, cause I'm without you, how I'm missing you so bad..where was my head, where was my heart, now I cry alone in the dark. I lie awake, I drive myself crazy-”

“This is the video where uncle Joey goes crazy and the girl slaps him!” Hadley says with a big grin.

“An' Daddy's hair had braids. Did they hurt?” Kenna asked, basically starting a whole other conversation, peppering Chris with questions before he told them to go wash their hands.

“I forgot what it was like when I lived at home with four sisters. Girls talk a lot,” Chris told Melissa as he came into the kitchen and washed his own hands and stole a piece of bacon off the plate. “Mmmm...good bacon.” He looked at Cam who was eating the head off a rabbit. “That good, son?”

“Cake..want more,” he said, doing the 'gimme' motion, his mouth full.

“He's definitely your son,” Melissa said, looking at Chris with a smile. “There you go, bubby. More cake.”

“I like cake too,” Chris whispered in his wife's ear and smacked her ass quickly.

“You're a bad man, Kirkpatrick,” Melissa told him with a smirk, getting the girls' plates ready. “Fix them some juice please?” she asked as Chris nodded. It wasn't anything fancy, nothing like she would have thought back before she'd ever come to New York and met Lance, Chris or any of the guys. She loved that they had a normal life. A busy one, with Chris gone part of the time in the studio with different bands as well as a new NSYNC album to promote and another tour-albeit shorter then the reunion tour, to get ready for.

“You're thinking awfully hard there,” Chris told his wife when he saw her lost in thought. “You okay?” he asked, smiling when she nodded.

“Just thinking about you touring again. The bed will be lonely. We'll be lonely,” she told him.

“You've still got a bit, baby. Don't start worrying now,” he told her, kissing her lips softly. It drove him crazy at times, but he secretly loved how much his wife loved him; that she'd start missing him even weeks before he'd be leaving.

*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^**^

Chris swung his leg over his Harley Davidson, starting the machine up. He backed it out of the garage and smiled at his wife who was holding a fussy little boy who was trying his hardest not to take a nap. “Be good for Momma, Cam. Take a nap, okay?” he said, watching his son who just shook his head before laying it on Melissa's shoulder. “See you in a few hours, baby,” he told Melissa, kissing her. “I love you.”

“Love you too. Have fun, be careful,” Melissa told Chris. She watched the black motorcycle with gold ghost flames disappear with the familiar 'potato' sound of the Harley engine fade as he got farther away. Even when he was on his other motorcycle, he was always safe, wearing protective clothing and a helmet. Of course he still had the biker look, smirking when she'd give him a once over after he got ready. “Come on baby, let's go take a nap.”

“No seepy, Momma.”

“What if I let you sleep on Daddy's side of the bed?” she asked as they went back into the house. The girls were quietly playing in their room, knowing Cam was trying to take a nap. “Or do you want me to hold you?” Melissa smiled when he nodded and got still after she sat down in her chair. Cameron was all boy and most of the time his mannerisms made her think of Chris. Their personalities were similar and she could see why her husband was so close to his younger sisters. He was a caring person and affectionate with those he loved. Their youngest child mirrored his father the same way; her love bug.

Ten minutes later, Melissa put Cameron down on the couch, covering him up with the fleece Pittsburgh Steelers blanket that laid over the back. She smiled as she watched him, wondering what little kids often dreamed about. The phone rang and she rushed to answer it before her son woke up, seeing that it was Addy.

“Adeline Bass,” she said, a smile on her face, sitting down in the chair she'd vacated to put Cameron down. “How are things two blocks over?”

“I hear no noises coming from the Kirkpatrick brood. Did you drug all of them? Kick Chris out of the house?” Adeline asked with a chuckle.

“Actually Chris is riding his motorcycle with some buddies, Cameron finally fell asleep and the girls are playing quietly. I'm not sure how long it will last and I should get up and check on them, but I may wait and enjoy the silence a few more minutes.” Melissa's eyes went over the pictures on the mantel, pictures of her and Chris and of their children. Chris always teased her about moving them around and changing them throughout the year. However, he always picked out some of his favorites and more than once she caught him staring at them, a small smile on his face. Melissa heard a yell and Addy cover the phone and say something. “It sounds busy on your side of the phone.”

“I have two children, but some days Lance is my third that makes the other two more crazy than if they were left on their own,” she sighed. “We need to go out for dinner and drinks. Or just dinner. Heck, at this point I'll take a trip to the grocery store and a gas station Slurpee as going out.”

“Wow...that sounds desperate,” she said, a smile coming to her face. “Lance and Chris are capable of holding down the fort for a few hours in the next week. We can order them some pizzas and make sure uncle Joey's on speed dial for when it gets bad.”

“You forget Joey is worse than both of our husbands.”

“Yeah, I-” Melissa heard her phone beep and looked at the caller ID. It was an unknown number but a New York one. She ignored it and then it called back immediately. “Addy, I will call you back, I have a call I need to take,” she said, switching over. “Hello?”

“Is this Melissa Kirkpatrick?” a female voice asked.

“Yes,” she answered, not sure who was calling.

“This is Hackensack University Medical Center. We're calling in regards to a Christopher Kirkpatrick. You're listed as his emergency contact. He was in a motorcycle accident and in surgery.”

Melissa swallowed a lump in her throat, wondering why none of Chris' buddies had called her but pushed that thought out. “Will he be okay?” she asked softly, trying to keep from crying.

“He was struck by a drunk driver who ran a stop light. His injuries are very extensive and they lost him once in the ambulance. They said to tell you that you need to be prepared for the worst, but hope for the best.” She gave Melissa directions to the hospital and instructed her where the surgery waiting room was.

Hanging up, she let the phone fall to the floor beside her with a thud. She swallowed hard and sucked in a breath, not sure of what to do next or who to call first. Grabbing her cell phone, she dialed Addy back. When Lance answered with a jovial 'Hello', her composure broke. “Lance, I need you,” she got out after a moment. “Chris has been in an accident.”

By the time Adeline and Lance came, Melissa had called Chris' mother, Beverly and her own parents. She wasn't sure exactly what she said to them; her mind was on auto-pilot, thinking of her husband and praying that he would be okay. 'They lost him once in the ambulance. Prepare for the worst, but hope for the best.' She had no idea what to tell the girls, not wanting them any more upset than possible until she knew what was going on. Her eyes landed on Cameron, who was still sleeping, unaware of what had happened to his father.

“Oh god,” she breathed, swallowing the lump in her throat. She felt a pair of arms around her and the smell of Lance's cologne. Melissa allowed herself a moment to lose it on him. This wasn't happening. Her husband was supposed to be coming home in a few hours so they could grill steaks and chicken for dinner outside.

“It's okay, Mel. Let's get over to the hospital,” Lance said, looking at Addy who was trying not to cry. “I called Joey. He's meeting us over there and getting a hold of JC and Justin. Come on, while the kids are playing...” he said softly, pulling her toward the front door so they could get into his SUV.

She got into the passenger seat of Lance's vehicle, not sure of what she should be doing. Her phone buzzed and it was a text from Justin.

'Be there asap. Let me know anything.'

“Justin said he's on his way soon,” she said softly, sending out a text to him and JC. Her phone rang and it was one of her sisters in law. “Hey Molly,” Melissa answered. “I'm on my way to the hospital..They said it was bad. I don't know anything really...Addy, Lance's wife, is with the kids. I left Cam asleep on the couch.” She started crying, and took the Kleenex that Lance offered. “Lance is driving me and Joey's meeting us there. I'm not sure who all is coming... I will call you as soon as I know more. Actually it sounds bad, but a group text would be easier...” her voice trailed off. “Not for bad news, Mol. Just for updates. I wouldn't do that. I know.. Love you too.”

Lance glanced over at the woman who had her forehead leaned against the window, tears coming down. “Chris is a fighter, Mel. He won't just give up,” he said, praying it was true. As much as he didn't want to admit it, they were all older. The body didn't bounce back the way it would even ten years ago. And depending on internal injuries, his friend could be on borrowed time. Of course he didn't say that, letting out a soft curse when the light turned red.

“Molly thought I was going to send a text out if her brother died. Is she kidding me? She apologized, but...” Melissa licked her lips and shook her head. “This is a bad dream, right? I fell asleep in my chair for a few minutes.”

Her phone buzzed again and she looked down. Joey had sent a text.

'Press already here. Fuckers. Come into ER and tell them you're Kirkpatrick family. Will take u 2 private waiting room.'

Melissa sent on Joey's message to everyone who needed it and sighed. “A drunk driver, Lance. Someone ran a red light..Don't they realize he has a family. What do I do if something happens?” she asked, her voice wavering once more.

Lance knew he'd have to go have a moment later, but right now he had to be strong. And he was thanking God that Joey would be there as well. “Those types of people don't think about anyone but themselves, honey. And right now...” he reached for her hand and squeezed it, giving him a moment to swallow the lump in his throat, “ right now we just have to pray that God will be with the surgeons and with Chris. And us.”

She nodded, not saying anything more until they got to the hospital, ignoring the reporters and paparazzi that had already descended on the hospital grounds. Melissa informed the ER nurse of who they were with and they were taken up to a smallish room filled with chairs and a television in the corner in a quiet part of the hospital.

“Yeah, she just got here. I'll call you back, Mom. I'll let her know, love you,” Joey said, hanging up the phone. He got it into his pocket and pulled the blonde woman to him. “I always wanted you to myself, but I never meant like this,” he teased slightly, listening to Melissa give a slight laugh before clenching Joey's shirt in her hands and letting out a sob. He ran his hands over her back. “They came in earlier to tell us that he has a few more hours of surgery at least.”

“At least?” Lance said, raising an eyebrow, standing next to Joey, his hand on Melissa's shoulder comfortingly as she stood there, quietly crying on the other man.

“Yeah, uh..He was hit on the right side and then the motorcycle and Chris were thrown across the intersection and then skidded ten feet beyond that. The Harley landed on top of him,” one of the guys who'd been riding with Chris said, still in shock. “He looked bad when they took him...”

Melissa looked up from where she was holding on to Joey and studied the men who'd been with Chris. She'd met them half a dozen times and liked them all, some guys he knew from doing charity work that rode motorcycles. “Thanks for coming and waiting...” she said softly, letting go of Joey and going to sit down. She wasn't sure what else to do or say. The nurse had given her papers to fill out that she'd put in one of the chairs. Things she could recite by memory. Patient's name, date of birth, social security number.

She paused at one of the questions. 'Does the patient have a living will?' Wiping a tear, she checked the correct box and went on. Her mind couldn't go there; life without him. Even the eight months they were separated when she'd been taken, nothing had been in dire straights like this. Melissa finished with the paperwork and took it to the nearest desk and dropped it off.

“Thanks, Mrs. Kirkpatrick,” the woman said, the radio playing softly in the background.

'Don't act like it's a bad thing to fall in love with me, cause you might look around and find your dreams come true with me' her husband's voice sang from the radio.

Melissa nodded, swallowing hard. “My parents and Chris' family will be coming in,” she said after a moment. “I know it may not be possible, but can we get an update even if he's still in surgery when they get here?” she asked.

“Let me call and find out down at the surgery desk, honey,” she gave her a small smile. “Chris was my second favorite after Justin. I know you don't care about that right now, but he has a lot of people thinking about him.”

Melissa gave her a small smile and listened to the woman talk, pulling out her phone. Social media had blown up with notifications to Twitter and Facebook, tagging both her and Chris. She noticed that Lance had logged into the @NSYNC Twitter account. She wasn't going to give a play by play, but it was much easier to let fans know what was going on herself than for them to speculate and believe the hype the media would come up with.

'@NSYNC: Prayers for our brother @IamCKirkpatrick, involved in a motorcycle accident.'

Pulling up her own Twitter account, she sent out a quick message. '@melly82: At hospital, Chris still in surgery. Will keep updated as can. Thnx for prayers and thoughts.' After that, she pulled up her pictures and tweeted out one of Chris and Cameron, both of them with the same expression on their face as they watched Hadley's game. 'Earlier today. Chris with his mini me, Cam. My two fave men ever.'

It got favorited and re-tweeted immediately and she put her phone back in her pocket when the woman got off the phone. “Any good news?” she asked hoping she'd be able to tell their families and friends something.

“At least five hours more of surgery. However, they got your husband's leg reset and all of the pins and screws in to keep it together. It was shattered in three different places. Now they are working on his shoulder and arm. It will take longer because his hand was crushed. A specialist is coming in as soon as possible.”

Melissa felt sick. She leaned on the desk and stared blankly for a moment before focusing back on the person in front of her. “Thank you,” she studied the woman's name on her badge, “Ashley.” Melissa gave her a watery smile, feeling better with the promise that they would be notified of what was going on. Walking back to where everyone was waiting, it felt like it had been an hour, but it had actually only been about ten minutes. She smiled a little, seeing Justin sitting and talking to Lance. Clearing her throat, all of them looked at her.

“We will get updates on Chris during surgery. It will be at least five hours longer. They got his leg fixed...” Melissa wiped a tear quickly. “Next is his shoulder and arm. A specialist is coming in to do his hand. It was crushed.”

“Fuck,” Justin muttered, running a hand through his hair. He had called in favors to get a private plane to bring him to New York from Los Angeles as fast as it could go. His manager had balked when Justin shut down recording and canceled all appearances for the next few days. Those could be rescheduled. Courtney would come in later, flying in from Memphis. Getting up, he pulled Melissa in for a hug. “Hey, Mel,” he said, giving her a smile. “I've been wanting to come see you, but not like this. Joey keeps telling me you make him cookies every couple of weeks. You should share that shit.”

“You don't ever open your mail, so why would I do that? I sent Court cookies last month for a party for her dance classes. You missed out, Timberlake,” she told him, thankful Justin was there, chuckling when he just shook his head. “I don't even get cookies at my house, so I know your pain.”

^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*

Five hours came and went with the makeshift waiting room filling up. Melissa kept staring at the television and then at her phone, checking the time. She bounced her leg, letting a breath out. “Five hours and twenty minutes,” she murmured to herself, swiping across the front and opening it up. She went to the pictures and looked through a few of the latest ones she'd taken. A smile came to her face when she pulled up a picture of Chris reading to Kenna. The best part wasn't that, it was the fact her husband was sporting barbie pink fingernails on one hand that was showing as he held a Harry Potter book.

She scrolled to another picture of her and Chris, dressed up for a charity event. He always looked handsome, not caring if he was seen in a pink or purple shirt. He was comfortable in who he was and loved to help those that needed it. A tweet came to her phone and she saw it. Fans had flooded her feed with thoughts and prayers. It was needed. Melissa had called to check on the girls and Cameron. Addy had assured her everything was fine with five children and that she would stay and help.

A hush came over the room when a tired looking man in scrubs came in. “I need to see Melissa Kirkpatrick,” he said, looking at the group of people. “And if she wants, two others so I can give an update and you can spread the word,” he explained. “Doctor/patient confidentiality prevents me from addressing everyone.”

Melissa stood up quickly. “Beverly and Mom,” she said, deciding on her mother-in-law and mother. The three women went outside and into a small room next to where they were. The surgeon looked at them after the door was shut, his face a bit grim. X-rays were up and lit up.

“I'm Dr. Glen Chitwood,” he introduced himself. “The orthopedic surgeon is in right now, trying to repair what he can of Mr. Kirkpatrick's hand. I'm afraid the best news I have is that the patient was very lucky. His internal injuries were ones that were on his extremities and the only trauma to his head happened to his right ear and eye. He had no brain swelling or injury to his head,” he said, pointing out the X-rays, explaining the surgeries he did, repairing Chris' leg, shoulder and arm. Essentially, Chris was now part bionic man.

The thought made Melissa smirk a little and she wiped tears. She had to chuckle slightly or she would break down completely. “What about his ear and eye?” she asked when he quit talking.

“We won't know until he wakes up, but from what we can tell, your husband will be at least fifty percent blind in his right eye. And his eardrum took a major impact when his head hit the ground. I cleaned out blood inside his ear and can say with confidence that he will be partially deaf. More than likely almost fully deaf in his right ear,” he explained softly, looking at the women.

“How long will it take for him to recover?” Beverly asked softly, concerned about Chris being able to overcome all of the injuries.

“It depends on him. Some people bounce back quicker than others. His arthritis in his knees isn't doing him any favors. He will almost certainly have to use a cane the rest of his life. Or at least when he gets tired or does too much. He will be in a lot of pain. Once he's out of surgery, we are going to keep him in ICU for a couple days and keep drugs in him to let his body rest and heal. Then we will slowly wake him up,” Dr. Chitwood explained. “I know he has a lot of concerned people waiting in there, but there can only be two people in ICU at a time to visit. And it's fifteen minutes every hour...and no children under the age of fourteen. Once he gets in a regular room, he can have more visitors at one time and his kids can come see him, if you want them to,” he added.

“Will he have a private room? The media was crazy outside the hospital...” Cathie Weston asked, glad that they didn't know who she was so she walked in with no fanfare with Paul to be with their daughter to wait for word on their son-in-law.

“Yes. We will make sure that it's noted that Mr. Kirkpatrick's visitors are limited to a list you provide and updates are only given to those who you want.”

They asked a few more questions and the surgeon held Melissa back after Beverly and Cathie had headed back to the waiting room.

“You have to understand, your husband slid on the asphalt with a motorcycle on top of him. He will have some scarring on his face and arm. The nurse shaved him and we got as much of the dirt and debris out as we could. He will need you...more than anyone else in that room.”

Melissa nodded, wiping tears, thanking the doctor once more. He said it would be at least another hour before the orthopedic surgeon was done and came to see them. She was numb. Chris was alive. His internal injuries were limited to parts of his body they could fix somewhat easier than others. She was in shock he had no broken ribs or internal bleeding. Walking back into the waiting room, she sat down next to her father and looped her arm through his, not saying anything. Listening to various conversations, she had no idea what to say or think.

“Come on, Kirkpatrick,” JC held his hand out to Melissa. “Let's go take a walk and find where they have all the junk food.” He didn't like hospitals and being here was enough to freak him out, much less all of Chris' injuries and thinking about the needles. “Don't make me drag you,” he said, giving her a slight smile.

Melissa took JC's hand, telling her father she'd be back. They found the break room with vending machines, getting drinks and junk food in silence. She was glad JC didn't say anything, dumbly pressing buttons, emptying the food machine of Ho-Ho's. “You know, Chris wanted his grooms cake to be Ho-Ho's with frosting,” she told JC with a small smile, sniffling. “I told him no...” her voice got quieter. “I tell him no a lot. With some of his crazier ideas...I wish I had told him yes to some of them. They weren't all bad...I just..I didn't want to deal with the mess it would make or the fact I just thought to myself it was silly.” Her lip quivered and she looked up at JC as fat crocodile tears rolled. “I wanted him to get the motorcycle.”

JC put the two drinks down that were in his hands on the table and walked over to Melissa, giving her a hug. “You telling Chris no isn't bad. I think Steph tells me no at least five times a day,” he told her, thinking of his wife who was at the hotel just down the street with their 10 month old son, Cooper. “You did nothing wrong, Mel. We all have our own ideas on things. I'm sure in true Chris fashion, he thought of something else to do just as quick after you told him no...” he smiled as she nodded. “And the motorcycle isn't a bad thing. I was a little jealous you were as excited about it as you were... I mean, how cool are you?” JC got serious. “He loves you, Melissa. None of this is your fault... Him going out to ride or anything you did.”

It didn't make her feel any better really, but she knew somewhere in the back of her mind that JC was right. “Thanks, C...” Melissa said, pulling away from him to gather up the snacks to take back to the waiting room for everyone. It was probably going to be this way for a very long time. Hurry up and wait.

Melissa paused outside of the ICU waiting room where Chris was, taking a deep breath. She could see him through the glass and from his side that was facing out, he looked okay, other than the IV's hooked up and the beeping machine monitoring his blood pressure and heart rate. When the orthopedic surgeon came in and told them that Chris was in recovery, they'd decided to let him wake up enough to make sure he could answer a few simple questions and assess his pain level before giving him some high dosage pain medication. Once they could go visit, everyone had decided to let her go by herself.

Stepping inside the room, she looked at her husband. They had shaved his face, and his right side was bandaged and his eye and ear were covered as well. They had Chris' shoulder immobile with a cast that went over his shoulder and wrapped around his torso. His arm was in a cast that traveled all the way down to his hand with his fingers and thumb separated but not able to move. Her husband's leg looked the scariest; a metal halo went around the length of his leg with metal rods coming out of his skin attaching to the contraption. Her stomach lurched, hating to think of how it felt and that she couldn't do anything to make it better.

Her fingers brushed his and she smiled a little when his eyes opened barely. “Hey...” she said softly, leaning in and kissing the left side of his lips. When Chris' hand squeezed hers a little harder, Melissa sniffled, her other hand brushing his hair softly. “I love you.”

“Love you,” Chris said softly, looking at her. He sighed and closed his eyes. Even though he was awake, there were some very good drugs in his system. When he opened his eyes again, he wasn't sure why he couldn't see out of his right one, reaching gingerly to feel around it. He looked at his wife questioningly when she pulled his hand away gently. “Is it bad?” he asked, wanting to know. When she didn't answer right away, he squeezed her hand again. “S'okay baby. Tell me.”

Sucking in a breath, she blew it out and wiped a few stray tears. “Your right side was basically put back together. Your leg, arm, hand and shoulder,” she explained what the surgeons had done as best as she could, watching Chris look away from her and a tear rolled down his cheek. “Your eye and ear took a hit also when you hit the asphalt...You're probably going to be mostly deaf in your right ear. And partially blind...” she wiped another tear that was on his face. “I'm sorry, Chris.”

Chris looked at his wife and pulled her hand to his lips and kissed it gently. “Not your fault...” he said and was quiet for a few minutes, lost in thought. He'd never seen it coming, riding through the traffic light when it was green for their lane. One moment he was on his motorcycle, the next he was being catapulted through the air. When he hit the pavement, the impact had knocked him out. He was sort of glad for that, not sure he'd have wanted to be awake when he skidded. Now he was laying in a hospital bed not able to move and... disabled. It was the only word he could come up with.

Then another thought hit him. “I can't play guitar,” he said finally, tears coming again. It wasn't that so much as that he couldn't do what he did before, which was make music and perform. Something that he was proud of, that he loved doing. Melissa was always the first person he'd go to for her input on a song or just to pick up one of his guitars and sing her a song. Now he didn't know if he'd even be able to use his right hand at all. More than music, would he be able to pick up his girls or hold his son. That thought hurt the most; having to not be the same father he was before. Or the same husband, looking down at his leg with the metal coming out of it. “Do you still want me?” he whispered, afraid of the answer and in pain.

Melissa bit her lip and ran a hand over his cheek lovingly. It hurt her heart to see him vulnerable like this. Afraid that for some reason she would decide not to love him. “Christopher Alan Kirkpatrick, you're my best friend and my husband. My lover and father of our children...my heart. I will always want you.”

Chris nodded and looked at her, feeling better in that sense. His head was still a mess of thoughts, grimacing when he shifted wrong in the bed.

“Let's worry about you getting better,” Melissa said, leaning in and kissing him once more. “Do you want anything?” she asked.

“More pain meds,” he said. When Melissa got up, he held her hand. He was drugged up and wanted her there. Chris wouldn't admit it, but he was scared that if she left he wouldn't see her again. That they wouldn't let her back in his room. “Can you come back?” he asked, glad when a nurse came in before she could leave.

Melissa looked at the nurse and then at him. “You can have more visitors in an hour. Your mom and sisters..the guys are out there. My parents... You have a waiting room full of people. Even the guys who were riding with you,” she said, watching the nurse change out some of the IV's and a what she figured was a catheter bag. “Right now you need to rest. I'm not going anywhere. I'll still be here later. Addy is watching the kids.”

Chris nodded a little and answered yes when the nurse asked if he hurt. When she told him she was going to knock him out for a little while, he just closed his eyes for a moment before opening them again and looking at Melissa. “Stay,” he said again.

“I will until you fall asleep, baby. I promise.” Melissa stroked her husband's cheek as he dozed off, glad when his breathing became deep and even. She kissed him again and got up, looking him over once more before she left ICU.

*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^

Chris heard the door to his hospital room open and he shut his eyes, pretending to be asleep. That wasn't hard, the pain medication he'd been given was working quickly. As much as he appreciated everyone visiting, he wanted to be left alone. Finally in a private room, it was nice to not feel like he was on display. Somewhere in his mind, he knew that wasn't the case but it was what he felt like. Hearing voices, his heart clenched when he recognized the little whispers.

“Momma, he's sleeping,” Hadley whispered, looking at her daddy. “Is he okay?”

“Yes, baby. He's okay, just hurt... You can go sit in the chair next to his bed if you want and hold his hand. Daddy won't mind,” Melissa said. She'd wanted to wait to bring the kids, but she figured it would be okay if they came for a few minutes. Her mother had come to take them home and leave her there for a little while to sit with Chris.

Chris felt a small hand grasp his lightly and opened his eye a little and saw Hadley looking at him, concern etched on her face. “Hey Hads. How are you?” he asked, seeing Kenna come into his view as well. “Hi Kenniebear.”

“Daddy...can you come home?” Kenna asked, putting her head near his. “We miss you.”

“I miss you too,” he said softly, hating that he couldn't move more. Chris saw Melissa, giving her a small smile before looking at the girls again.

“I won my ball game, Dad,” Hadley said after a moment. “Uncle Joey and Grandpa took me and yelled the loudest. And Cam ate two cotton candies.”

“Really? That's good,” Chris told her, accepting kisses on his cheek from his daughters. “Daddy's gonna take a little nap. They gave me medication before you got here,” he explained.

“Well, they weren't going to stay long. My mom is taking them back to the house,” she told him, listening to the girls make over Chris, giving him kisses and asking him questions quietly. Melissa squeezed Chris' hand. “I'm going down to the cafeteria but will be back.”

“M'kay,” he said softly, mumbling bye to the girls. Chris heard them leave and settled back on the pillow and closed his eyes. At the moment he wasn't in pain and thankful for that, drifting off to sleep.

*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^

Melissa sat in the cafeteria, eating a hot ham and cheese sandwich after the girls and her mother had left, trying to give Chris some time to sleep and not have anyone in his room. She knew everyone had the best intentions coming to see Chris: to sit and check on him; to see if they needed anything, but after three days of constant calls and people she was about to go crazy. She figured Chris was as well, although he was drugged up quite a bit. Especially after they tweaked his halo around his leg.

She'd stepped out for that procedure and tears came when she heard Chris yelling and went back in and her husband had tears rolling down his face. They were tightening the whole thing so the bones would line up. Even with the screws there were still small gaps in the bone and the halo kept them all still. It could be moved slightly, but it wasn't pain free by any means.

Getting up, Melissa threw her tray away and made her way back up to Chris' room. Another thing Chris hated was the casts on his shoulder and arm. He said it itched and was hot. That wasn't quite the wording he used with her, but he told the nurse as much when she asked. The doctor hadn't let Chris see the right side of his face yet, keeping the wounds medicated and healing. When she'd taken a peek, it was clear that he was a very lucky man that it was just going to be scarring.

“He's asking for you,” the nurse said who was just coming out his room. She frowned a little and took Melissa's hand. “The doctor said to take the bandages off his face and around his ear and eye.”

They both jumped when they heard a yell and something crash from inside the room. Going in, Melissa found her husband yelling at the other nurse.

“Why the hell did you give me a mirror? Do you think I wanted to fucking see myself? I can't even see out of my right eye!” he yelled, throwing his hospital cup that was full of ice water in the nurse's general direction, along with the lunch tray that landed partly on Melissa.

“Christopher Alan!” Melissa said loudly, getting his attention. It took her breath when he looked at her. A long scar ran from his forehead along his nose and back over his cheek, with more skin healing. She ignored the jello and mashed potatoes and chicken strips covering the bottom part of her legs and feet, stepping over to the bed where Chris' fist was clenched and he was crying angry tears.

“Don't tell me it's okay...It's not okay,” Chris said through clenched teeth, looking at his wife. “I look like some sort of freak,” he muttered, letting more tears fall into his wife's shirt as she held him close. He felt wet on the back of his neck and knew she was crying too. He felt like a failure; stuck in a hospital bed not able to move or do anything like before and now his face looked like it had gone through all five Rocky movies and come out the loser. “Just go home, Mel.”

He felt bad when she looked at him, seeing the hurt in her eyes. “Come back tomorrow or something. Or wait a few days. I don't care...” he said, handing her the mirror. “Tell everyone else to go home. I don't want to see them either.” It was either say that or yell at his wife, which he was trying hard not to do. He looked at her pants and saw the food on her, feeling worse.

“I...They may not listen to me,” Melissa said softly.

“Tell them I don't want to fucking see them. Or you..for a few days. Just go away.” Chris growled, turning his head away when Melissa kissed him and told him she loved him, not replying to her. He listened to her make apologies to the nurses and help them clean a few minutes before he heard her leave. That was when a gut-wrenching sob left him.

“Moooooommmmaaaa.”

Melissa rolled over in the king size bed and squinted at the clock. It was almost two in the morning and she hoped if she left Cameron alone that he would go back to sleep. It felt weird not to have Chris beside her in bed. She let out a breath she didn't know she'd been holding when the baby monitor went quiet a few moments later.

Picking up her phone off the nightstand, she unlocked the screen and browsed through missed messages. One made her smile. It was from Chris.

'R u coming 2morrow? Miss u, love u.' The time stamp was just a little while ago and she replied.

'Yes. In the morning and can stay for a couple hours or longer. Up to you.' A minute later, her phone vibrated, showing 'Kirkpatrick' on caller ID with Chris' picture. “Hello?”

“Hey...How are you? Why are up?” Chris' voice was soft but didn't sound sleepy.

“I'm alright. I miss you. I'm up because a little boy yelled for me over the baby monitor and went back to sleep,” Melissa told Chris. “How are you?” She snuggled with her husband's pillow, getting a whiff of his cologne. She'd sprayed some on it the first night she'd come home. Even though she was exhausted, Melissa took a long time to get to sleep and that had helped.

Chris sighed and looked at the television that was playing an infomercial. “I'm hurting, Mel. They gave me some pain meds and it's supposed to make me tired. That was two hours ago,” he said, trying to shift in bed. “I just hurt and have a bad attitude.”

“You're allowed to have a bad attitude. Half of you is like the Terminator,” Melissa told Chris, hearing him snort. “I'm sorry, I shouldn't be joking baby.”

“I'd rather hear you joke about it than cry,” he told her honestly. “I just want to come home... And watch my own television in my house. I..I'm sorry about the other day. I was pissed off,” he explained, his voice more quiet than before. “I keep hoping every day the door opens that it's you or maybe Joey or Lance. Mom came to see me before she and Taylor left.”

Melissa swallowed the lump of emotions that was in her throat. “It's okay, Chris. I can't even imagine what you're going through.”

“The doctor ordered tests for my hearing on my right side. They said I was eighty percent deaf in that ear. And blind in my right eye. What a bitch,” he growled. “I wish I had some alcohol. It wouldn't help anything but it sounds good.”

“I'll get you some when you get home,” she told Chris. “I love you.”

“I love you too. I'm not quite sure why you do. I'll have to come home and have help wiping my own ass. Doesn't that sound like something you want to do for your husband?”

Melissa tried hard not to sniffle and let Chris know she was crying. She didn't know what to do for him, hating that he was so bitter and angry. However, she didn't think she'd blame him for how he felt. “I will do whatever I have to,” she told him. Melissa listened for a sound on the other side of the phone and heard a big sigh after a few minutes. “Are you okay? Chris?”

“Yeah, I'm okay baby. I just..I missed hearing your voice,” he finally said after a few minutes. “I'm gonna get off here and try to sleep. You need some sleep. The kids won't care I called in the middle of the night. They'll want breakfast early,” he told his wife. “I miss my kids. Give them hugs and kisses for me.”

“I will. I love you, Kirkpatrick.”

“I love you, Weston. See you later today,” he said, hanging up before Melissa could chastise him about using her maiden name. Chris put his phone down and frowned. He was tired enough to sleep now but his brain wouldn't shut off. The television was playing another infomercial and he watched that until he dozed off.

*^*^*^*^*^*

“Daddy said to tell you he loves you and to give you hugs and kisses,” Melissa told her children as they clamored to the kitchen for breakfast. She accepted hugs and kisses from the girls, while Cameron just puckered up his lips and sloppily kissed her on the cheek when she bent over to pick him up.

“Love you, Momma,” Cam said, holding her face, patting it gently.

“I love you too, little boy.”

“Mom, can we go see Daddy today?” Hadley asked as they sat down with a bowl of cereal and fruit.

“Yeah, we want to see Dad. Can he come home?” Kenna asked, her mouth half full of banana.

Melissa was working on putting Cameron in his high chair when they asked and she shook her head. “No, I'll take you to go see him in a couple days. He can't come home, Kennie baby. They want him to heal some more before he can come home and be with us.” She turned to look at the girls who were both frowning. She felt bad for them, knowing they missed their Dad. Chris hadn't been away from them much since they'd been born. Not only that, he was always ready to play tea party or make up, even coming into the kitchen with bright blue eyeshadow and Nicki Minaj pink lips and a feather boa around his neck. He'd made the excuse they needed more cookies for the tea party and shrugged, making Melissa laugh.

It was when Hadley started crying that her heart broke.

“I want my Daddy! I want him home now!” she yelled as she balled up her fist and hit the table. “I want Daddy now,” she howled, causing Kenna to start crying and Cameron wasn't far from bawling at the noise his sister was making.

Melissa pulled Hadley to her, trying not to cry herself. “I know Hads. Believe me, if I could have Daddy here, I would,” she whispered, holding the 7 year old as she cried. She looked at Kenna who was wiping tears. Their 6 year old wouldn't break down like Hadley. She was quiet, but tough in not wanting to throw a fit about something. 'Drama free' is what Chris called her. When Hadley's sobs turned into sniffles, Melissa pulled back to wipe her daughter’s tears. “Are you okay baby?”

Hadley nodded. “I still want my Daddy.”

“I know baby. He loves you and misses all of you so much.”

Melissa held it together for the rest of breakfast, cleaning up the mess and getting the kids settled in the living room, watching 'Frozen'. She didn't like the television being a baby sitter but at the moment it would work. Picking up her cell phone, she dialed Addy.

“I can't do this, Ad,” she said as she slid down the master bedroom door after it shut, tears coming down her face.

“Can't do what? Is everything okay? Livy, go color baby... Talk to me, Kirkpatrick.”

Melissa cleared her throat and tried to keep it together. “I just..Hads had a meltdown. And Kenna is sad even if she doesn't say much. And Cam is too young but he misses Chris. I miss Chris. Why did this happen? What did we do wrong?” she asked, her head leaning against the door. “I know Chris is going out of his mind being stuck at the hospital. I keep asking him what he wants me to bring him and he just says nothing. That he wants to go home. And he has that monstrosity in his leg...”

“Mel..honey..take a breath,” Addy instructed, listening to her take a few breaths. “You did nothing wrong. Chris did nothing wrong...Sometimes these things happen. It's not fair, and I can't even imagine if it was Lance what I would feel like. I know it's not a good answer. Do you need me to come over early?” she asked her.

“No. Lance is coming to get Hads and Kenna for Hadley's ballgame. I think they're meeting Joey and Briahna and Kloey. I'm not sure if that will go well or not. They might be broke buying snacks,” Melissa told her friend. “Are you sure you don't mind watching Cam?”

“I wouldn't have offered if I didn't want to. Liam is going with Lance so all I will have is Olivia and Cameron. And he's way cuter than Chris, even if he looks like his Daddy.”

Melissa chuckled a little. “He's Chris' mini me,” she told her friend. “Is it bad I want to go stay the night at the hospital? But I feel like I would be abandoning the kids. They need me too...”

“But how much good will it do you if your mind is on Chris? Will you be paying attention to them or just halfway there? It's not fair to either one of you. I'm sure we can find a place for the girls to stay and I'll keep Cam,” Adeline said. “And I will come over early to let you take a hot bath and get ready. Just have the girls pack a bag...and you pack a bag.”

“Thanks, Ad. I don't know what I'd do without you,” Melissa said.

“I love you too, Mel.”

They talked a few more minutes before Melissa let her go. She was feeling better about things and closed her eyes, sending up a prayer for Chris that today would be better than the day before.

*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^

Chris clicked over to VH1 to watch the “Nirvana Takeover” that was being played. A small smile crossed his lips as he caught the middle of “Smells Like Teen Spirit”. He mouthed the words, watching Kurt Cobain sing. When the door opened, he smiled wider at seeing his wife. “Hi baby,” he said, turning the volume down on the television.

“Hey yourself,” Melissa said, putting her purse down and coming to give him a kiss. “I would have been here sooner, but traffic was awful. And our son decided that he didn't want Aunt Addy, he wanted Momma. So I left him screaming at the front door. I don't win parent of the year,” she told him, looking him over. “You look different.”

“They decided to get me up a couple hours ago and see if I could walk a little and pee on my own. Well, I was helped to get up and someone watched me pee, but it was nice to stand up and take a piss. And then they said I could get a shower if I thought I could stand it. At least the parts of me that aren't in a cast. And my leg stayed out,” he gestured to the leg still in the halo. “I asked when that would come off. They said hopefully a few more weeks. It will be after I'm home...”

She nodded at him. “Did they say when you'd get to come home?” she asked softly, her hand loosely in his.

“No. I'm asking the doctor when he comes in. Unless you're going to start smuggling in food. And I hurt, but they gave me something that made me feel good, so you could probably sawz-all my leg off and I wouldn't care.”

“Smuggle in food? Like what kind of food?” Melissa asked Chris, a smile on her face.

“Tacos, pinwheels, apple pie. Lots of apple pie, some ice cream..” he said, pulling her closer. “Come here with me. In bed,” he demanded, looking at her. “I'm not hurting and in a pretty good mood, Weston. I want to hold you.”

Melissa kissed him and got into the hospital bed and looked at Chris, squished against the rail. “How..romantic,” she smirked when he gave her a look. “Take a picture with me. Please.” She got her cell phone ready on the camera feature.

“Just don't share it,” Chris told her, giving a smile for the picture. He still hated how he looked, even though his face was healing up. He would always have the scar and he doubted he could grow a full beard, which was disappointing. It was just facial hair, but it was his face. “Here,” he said, taking the phone, moved his face to where the left side was showing more than the right. “Make a funny face, Mel.” He stuck his tongue out and his wife did the Elvis lip curl. “There. Share that one.”

Melissa took the phone from him and share the picture on Twitter and Facebook.

'@melly82: with @IamCKirkpatrick at the hospital. Bein' silly. Thank God for the good days'

“Here's one you might like,” Melissa told Chris as replies started. “Taylor said we look cute and she's glad to see you looking goofy as usual.”

“How long are you staying?” Chris asked, not wanting her to leave. He didn't mind the nurses coming and going, but tv and magazines and his phone got boring. Talking on the phone wasn't the same as having an actual living, breathing person there.

“Well, Hadley had a meltdown and then I had a meltdown..so Addy thought it was necessary for the girls to go spend the night at Joey's house while Cameron stays with the Bass family so I can spend the night with my husband,” Melissa explained, running her hands over Chris' face. She was thankful that his right eye wasn't too discolored, only on a little of the iris. “Is that okay?”

Chris nodded, hating that he still couldn't move more. “It's fine baby. What did Hads have a meltdown about?” he asked, running his fingers through her hair with his good hand.

“She wanted you. Kenna cried too, but didn't say anything. I had to calm her down and then had to call Addy and have a meltdown myself. We miss you. I know you want to be home... the kids are missing their Daddy. Their play buddy and person to get in trouble with,” she smiled when Chris harrumphed. “You're a big softy, Kirkpatrick.”

“I like making them smile,” he told her honestly. “And you can't say Cam isn't spoiled. He just bats those eyes at you and you give in.”

“I seem to recall someone else who does that and gets what he wants,” Melissa replied, laying there with Chris in comfortable silence, save for the hospital noises. She figured this was a rare moment when her husband would be in a pleasant mood and they could have time like this. Her phone buzzed and she showed Chris the picture. It was of Briahna, Kloey, Hadley, Kenna and Liam all eating ice cream. 'Uncle Lance and Uncle Joey got suckered into Steak and Shake.'

“Sometimes, Lance is a bigger sucker than me. Tell him I said that,” Chris said, smiling at his wife's reply to their friend. “And tell him thanks. I needed you here with me.” He'd not told her yet, but the doctor put him on anti-depressants and he hoped those were working. It had been a bad few days when she wasn't here, but he figured Melissa didn't need to know that. It could be his little secret.

“Daddy, does your leg hurt?” Kenna asked Chris, looking at the halo that still was around his leg. “Can I kiss it and make it better?”

“No,Kenniebear. It doesn't quite work that way,” Chris said, giving her a small smile, “but thank you baby.” He'd been home all of five hours and halfway wished he was still in the hospital. The kids had been happy to see him, smothering him with hugs and kisses after being told to be careful of his injuries.

It wasn't his kids or even Melissa, who'd made sure he was comfortable as she could make him in his chair and gave him his medication and a kiss and left him alone to try and relax. It was his sisters and mother who'd come to see him out of the hospital that were making him crazy. Every time he'd get comfortable and almost asleep, one of them would ask if he was okay, if he needed anything. Kenna ran off to play with Hadley and a couple cousins and he closed his eyes.

“Chris, you feeling okay?” Kate asked, coming to sit in Melissa's recliner, looking at him.

“I would be if people would leave me alone and let me sleep,” he mumbled, not opening his eyes. “I love you, but go away. Take my wallet and give it to my wife and tell her to take everyone out for dinner and then, I don't know, do something fun. Go to the park, go to a movie, get ice cream...Just get out of my house for a few hours.”

He didn't see Kate's face fall a little, but he did hear her sigh. Chris opened one eye. “You all act like I can't do anything without someone up my ass. It hurts like a mother fucker, but believe it or not, I don't need someone to go with me while I go take a piss.” To reinterate the point, Chris lowered the footrest on his recliner and reached for the cane that the doctor had prescribed him. He liked it better than the walker event though it took him a few minutes to get up. A sheen of sweat covered his face and he glared at his sister and then Taylor who'd come in the living room.

“Do you want any-”

“Leave it alone, Tay,” Chris got out, moving slowly toward the master bedroom, cutting off his youngest sister's question. He could hear music softly playing when he got to the door and opened it slowly to see Melissa rocking Cameron. He came in their room and sat down on the edge of the bed, running a hand over his face. “Weston, do you love me?” he asked softly, hearing Cameron whine and her whisper something.

Melissa looked at her husband who was sweating from the exertion of just walking and nodded. “You know I do, Kirkpatrick,” she replied softly, shifting the blanket over their son as she continued to rock him.

“Then for the love of all that is Holy, take my family and get them out of our house for a few hours. I told Kate for you to take my wallet and everyone go out to eat. Do something..I want the house to myself where I can sleep. I love my sisters but they are driving me bat shit crazy.”

“They're worried about their big brother, Chris. What are you going to do when it's just me and the kids? We're going to make noise and the only reason the girls aren't hovering is because they have their aunts and cousins and your Mom and Step-Dad here,” Melissa pointed out. She didn't want to make him mad, but it would be different until he could rest in a bed.

“I know, but it's...different. I'm exhausted and now I have to get up and make it to the bathroom...” his voice trailed off and he looked at his wife. Chris was wearing a pair of sweatpants with one leg cut out to make room for the metal around his leg. He pushed himself awkwardly off the bed with his one good arm and the cane, biting his lip. “Fuck,” he swore softly, looking down. “Come help me..please.”

Melissa nodded, thankful that Cameron had fallen asleep, putting him down in the middle of their bed before moving to Chris' bad side and helping get him to the bathroom. “Need help with anything else?” she asked.

“I've been pissing on my own for the last forty one something years, baby..I think I got that part,” he told his wife, kissing her temple before she let him go. Chris hurt and wondered if he could get more medication. Or take more, especially when his leg hurt. The fleeting thought had entered his mind once or twice to see how many he could take at once. That thought surprised and disturbed him. He wasn't suicidal, just tired of hurting. Everything hurt all the time.

Chris looked at himself in the mirror and made a face. He'd never thought of himself as a guy who girls thought was 'hot'. Women liked him, sure, back when NSYNC was the biggest thing ever and his name got them one step closer to Justin or JC. Of course his self confidence was now subjected to what was staring back at him. A forty-three year old who was now incapable of listening to music on headphones or dancing around with his daughters when they watched old NSYNC videos. Albeit, it had been a little slower, but he remembered the moves. His left eye focused behind him to see Melissa slip into the bathroom and put her arms around his stomach and hug him lightly. “This sucks,” he told her softly, his left hand moving to cover hers. “You sure you want me like this?”

“Like what? I see my husband...the man I love. Your cast will come off and that halo will be taken out and off your leg. You're still Chris Kirkpatrick. That didn't change,” Melissa told Chris as he frowned at her in the mirror.

“You make it sound so easy. You're not the one hurting if you even move slightly. That can't even get dressed without help or drive a vehicle or play an instrument...see out of one eye. My depth perception sucks,” he told her. Sucking in a breath, he saw the hurt on her face and then her attempt to cover it up. Chris was thankful when she didn't try to argue with him.

“I'll go see where everyone wants to eat at,” Melissa told Chris softly, letting herself move away from him and picked up Cameron and put him down in the pack n play that was in their room, covering him with a blanket. She watched Chris looking at his son and loved that moment. Slipping out of their bedroom, she said a quick prayer that everyone would cooperate to go out. Melissa wasn't sure she could handle more stress with more family members and Chris not resting. She could tell he was exhausted and hadn't even been home a full day. It was going to be a long healing process and she just prayed they'd all get through it.

*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^**^*^*^

Chris was settled in his chair, the house silent. He'd napped for about forty-five minutes and now was awake. And bored. He'd watched enough television in the hospital that it wasn't even interesting at this point and time. He awkwardly went through the magazines on the table beside his chair and then reached for the object underneath them. He smiled at a little when he pulled it out. It was his and Melissa's wedding album full of pictures and their engagement announcement, along with notes from their friends. He was sure the girls had wanted to look at it at some point; giggling over pictures of them.

It had been one of the happiest days of his life, along with the births of his children. The first picture was of Melissa getting ready, Addy applying some lip stick on her. Then the next was one of him and Joey. His friend had a serious look on his face, tying his bow tie so it would lay right. Of course that was after a few choice curse words.

He smiled at a picture the photographer had taken. It was him standing at the door that said “Bridal Party” on the outside on a piece of paper, the door open just slightly and him with a smile on his face.

Chris ran his fingers down the palm of Mel's hand, reassuring her.

“How about I be the last voice you hear tonight?” she whispered.

“And every other night for the rest of the nights that there are,” he responded, smiling at the reference of the song he'd written with Lance that was hers.

“That's a good place to start.”

“How about we go get married, Mel?” he asked, feeling better than he had a few minutes before. He hadn't had doubts, but Chris just needed to hear her voice.

“I think that's a good idea,” Melissa replied. “I love you, Chris.”

“I love you too, Mel.” Chris squeezed her hand and felt her fingers linger on his. “See you in a few minutes, Weston.”

“My last name won't be Weston in about twenty minutes.”

Chris chuckled and nodded. “I love you,” he told her again before letting her hand go. He was more than ready to make her his wife. He went toward where he was sure the guys were waiting. Smiling sheepishly, he shrugged at Adeline who was pointing at him.

“Please for all that is Holy, tell me you didn't see the bride?” she hissed, pulling on his arm to hurry him up. “You know the wedding was supposed to start twenty minutes ago.”

“I had to go say hi,” he told Addy, chuckling when she gave him a dirty look before going back toward where Melissa was. “I'm going, I'm going.” Chris opened the door to where the men were waiting. It wasn't just JC, Justin, Joey and Lance. His best man was one of his best friends from high school, plus Paul Weston who was waiting with them to go walk his daughter down the aisle.

“She wouldn't have run off, son,” Paul told his almost son-in-law with a smile. “Was she ready?” he asked.

“Yeah,” Chris told him with a smile. “Let's go get me married, boys.”

“When someone asks if there's an objection, I'm saying yes. You're marrying way above you, Kirkpatrick,” Justin said, squeezing Chris' shoulder good naturedly. “I'm fuckin' happy for you dude,” he half whispered.

*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*
Chris looked at another picture, one of them dancing. He had no idea if it was the first dance or not. Melissa had taken dance lessons from Courtney as well as Joey and Justin and him. Surprisingly, Justin was the most patient, declaring that she was the female version of Lance when it came to learning steps. Joey had laughed at that, but Chris had appreciated his help when they would find an empty room backstage to practice in. He knew it was important to Melissa to be able to have a real first dance instead of just shuffling around on the dance floor, so beyond rehearsal and sound check and a full show he was dancing. And it was worth every minute.

“How will you know if I love you for life? How will you know? Girl, you will know when you look in my eyes..I could never hurt you, I would never break your heart. And I'll love you til the day that I die, gonna love you for life..” Justin Guarini's voice serenaded them as they celebrated being married.

“How are you Mrs. Kirkpatrick?” Chris whispered, looking at his wife with a smile.

“I'm not sure I can be any happier,” she told him, kissing him softly.

They ignored the cat calls and whistles, Chris shaking his head at their friends after he broke off the kiss. “You sure we can't just go up to our room? Leave the rest of them to their own devices?” he asked with a bigger smile and a heated look. He knew they were both exhausted from the last week of trying to get everything done and just nerves. They'd agreed to go to their room and crash after the reception.

“And leave Justin and Joey down here with a dance floor to themselves?” Melissa looked at Chris like he'd gone crazy. “Along with food and alcohol, cake..As much as I love you and as tired as I am, there's no way in hell we're going early. Suck it up, Kirkpatrick.”

He raised an eyebrow at her as she smirked at him. “Now it starts. We haven't even been married an hour,” Chris teased. “Remind me to put you in your place later, baby.”

“I hope that's underneath you,” Melissa grinned wider as Chris' eyes widened at the sexual innuendo.

“We're not getting any sleep on our honeymoon...You remember I'm old?” Chris told her as they moved across the floor.

“Quit whining. I promise to make it worth any sleep you lose,” Melissa held his face lovingly. “I love you so much.”

“I love you too...” he pulled her closer, his lips brushing her forehead. Chris was looking forward to spending the rest of his life with his wife, starting a family. It had been worth the wait since he was younger, the past broken relationships and everything he'd been through to get to this point. He was sure life could only get better.

“Yeah right,” he muttered to himself at the last thought, shutting the photo album. Chris never saw this coming and wondered if life would be anything like it was before. Shifting in the chair, he grimaced and groaned when his right leg didn't want to move. He reached over with his left hand and tried to physically move it and let out a yell when the Halo pulled on his skin and the bone. The pain was nauseating and it pissed him off. It was at that moment, Chris was thankful his pills were put up because if he could have reached them, he would have taken the whole bottle.

“Shhhh...Daddy's sleeping,” Kenna's voice stage whispered as she and Hadley came into the living room. They were awake early on a Tuesday morning and wanted to watch cartoons. She grabbed the remote and turned the tv on.

Chris heard the girls and tried to ignore the noise. He'd not slept well at all, his leg and right side hurting and he wasn't able to get comfortable. The halo had come off, along with the cast that had been around his shoulder, arm and body. The longest three months he'd ever been through and he'd been looking forward to sleeping in his bed, except that it hurt too much when he laid down. The doctor had said it would hurt and ordered physical therapy to start the next day.

So he'd gotten up and moved, albeit slowly, to his chair. The cast on his hand had come off, but his fingers barely bent at his knuckles. That had pissed Chris off as well; not able to grip anything, pain causing him to not be able to hold both of his daughter's hands. Someone would have to be left out. And Cameron had come earlier that evening and wanted Chris to play with him, not understanding that he couldn't use both of his hands to catch a big bouncy ball. It broke his heart when Cam got frustrated when Chris let it go past him, yelling at his sisters who tried to play.

“This show is stupid,” Hadley told her sister, grabbing for the remote.

“No it's not, I want to watch it,” Kenna said, raising her voice and holding the remote away. “You're not the boss of the tv.”

“You always watch this.”

Chris barely opened his eyes and looked at the girls, who were now about to get into a physical fight over the control to the tv. “Girls..” he said, not opening his eyes more. “Give Daddy a little peace and quiet. Go watch tv in the playroom.”

“We don't like that tv,” Hadley said, wrestling the object away from Kenna.

Chris heard Kenna whimper and the channel change. He'd listened to them fight the last five minutes. Melissa had been up with Cameron early that morning, so he figured she was asleep with their son in the bedroom. “Hads, what did I say?” he opened his eyes and looked at the blonde who sat there and ignored him. He'd tried not to notice the attitude she was getting, most of the time letting a lot of things slip by thanks to his own issues, but he'd caught that. “Hadley Nicole, come here.”

Hadley got up and trudged over to Chris, sighing and crossing her arms at him, avoiding his leg and right side in general. “Yes?” she asked, not happy.

“Did I not tell you to knock it off and go watch television somewhere else?” Chris asked. “I didn't sleep well...”

“Why didn't you sleep in your bed with Momma?” she asked him. “You're always in here. We can't do anything without it being noisy...” she huffed. “And you don't even play with us anymore. You're no fun.”

Chris swallowed hard and tried not to let it hurt, but it did. He knew that things had been hard on all of them. “I can't play with you a lot Hads. You know that...Daddy hurts all the time.”

“Then you shouldn't have ridden the stupid motorcycle!”

Chris opened his mouth to start to say something, not hearing the bedroom door.

“Hadley Nicole Kirkpatrick!” Melissa halfway yelled, causing them all to jump. “Go to your room and when you've decided you can be nice, come apologize to your Daddy. No tv for the rest of the day. Do you hear me?”

Chris watched his oldest glare at his wife but go to her room and slam the door. He looked at Melissa who was trying not to cry. “It's okay, Mel...” he said softly, trying to get out of the chair, going slow. “I'll go try and lay in the bed again,” he told her.

“It's not okay, Chris. Hadley can't yell at everyone because she's mad. And it's not your fault-”

“Technically it is,” he said after he groaned, getting up. “If I hadn't ridden that damn motorcycle I wouldn't be fucking handicapped. She's just saying what everyone is thinking. Even if you don't want to admit it,” he muttered as he passed her.

“That's not fair and you know it,” Melissa told him. She watched Chris stop, leaning on his cane and then turn to face her.

“So you're saying you like me like this? Unable to do anything...can't drive myself anywhere or get dressed on my own,” he watched her face redden and she looked away. “Thanks a fucking lot, baby. You'd rather me be like this-”

“I'd rather you be like this than dead! Yes Christopher, I would!” Melissa yelled at him, surprising herself at her outburst. Her hand went to her mouth and she stared at her husband, not sure of what to say.

“You wouldn't be saying that if you were me,” he told her, glad Kenna had gone to her own room. “The last three months has been Hell. And it doesn't look like it's getting any better. And don't get on to Hads ;she doesn't understand. And you getting mad at her doesn't help...”

“So you want our daughter to think it's okay to say whatever she wants?” Melissa asked.

“When she's right.” He shrugged. “Just..lay off the girls. And me.” Chris was pissed off and he wanted an outlet. Something to make him feel better and right then it was the person standing in the living room talking to him that would get his wrath. He held up a hand before she could say anything. “You're not a damn physical therapist and surfing the internet for exercises for me to do doesn't make you one. You cook, you clean...make sure everything is taken care of. That's what I need you for. Not to drive me bat shit fucking crazy about every damn thing you think I need to be doing or not doing.” Momentarily, he felt bad when he saw her face fall but figured that he'd apologize later. Right now he was exhausted, going to their room. He frowned at the piles of laundry that were at the end of the bed and on the dresser.

Chris did give a smile at the sleeping baby on their bed, clinging to his *NSYNC marionette. He sat down on the bed gingerly and then laid down. Grabbing one of the decorative pillows off the floor, he propped himself up a little. The door opened and he watched Melissa come in and not even look at him, going to their bathroom. The bathroom door shut and locked and Chris sighed.

“Fuck,” he muttered, grabbing another pillow and trying to move his right leg enough to get it propped up as well.

Melissa sat with her back against the bathroom door and listened to Chris curse and the noises from him moving around. She held the balled up Kleenex in her hand and let tears fall. The last three months had felt like a roller coaster that didn't have an off switch. Between Chris and the kids, the house had been neglected. Joey and Lance had helped take Chris to a few doctor's appointments and Addy and Kelly had watched the kids, but for the most part, she had done it all. And her husband had never talked to her like he had a bit ago. Chris used to be mild tempered and so loving. Now he was just...angry...about life. She jumped when she heard a loud thud and a yell. Getting up quickly, she opened the bathroom door and didn't see Chris on the bed but Cameron was sitting up, watching him.

“Daddy fall,” he said, looking at Chris.

“Don't touch me,” Chris said, seeing Melissa come into view. “Take Cam out of here and leave me alone...”

“Are you hurt?” she asked him, seeing Chris lay there on his right side, breathing hard.

“For the love of God, shut up and leave me alone. Can't you listen to me at all? Jesus Christ, Mel..” he half yelled. “I'll get up on my own.” Chris was hurting enough he would have done something bad if he could have moved, closing his eyes as tears came. His body wouldn't have bounced even ten years ago, but now the metal that was holding him together didn't give and there was no bounce in anything. He heard his wife whispering to Cam and leaving the room. Rolling over a little to his back, Chris stared at the ceiling, wondering if God was playing some sort of joke on him as his mind wandered.

“Nurse Ratched, I need some assistance,” Chris yelled as he came in the door of their apartment, dropping his bag. “Wade tried to kill us tonight. Even Justin told him to lay off a little,” he huffed, kissing his girlfriend's cheek as she came and helped him limp to the couch. “A couple of pain pills and Gatorade. I'm dying,” Chris groaned, wincing as he straightened out his legs. “And ice packs.”

“What about dinner?” Melissa asked him, bringing him the pills and drink first, then the ice packs. “The roast and carrots and gravy are still warm in the crock pot. With mashed potatoes.”

“I'm surprised Joey didn't try to come home with me,” Chris said with a tired chuckle, leaning his head back and closing his eyes. “Tell me I'm not too old to be doing this. I feel too old...”

“Not old. Experienced,” Melissa said with a smile, kissing Chris softly as she sat his dinner down on the coffee table in front of him.

At the time he hadn't hurt his knee much less had major surgery to one whole side of his body. He wasn't sure how long he'd been on the floor, but he saw the door open and heard Joey's voice. Chris figured his wife had called their friend, watching the younger man come in and shut the bedroom door.

“You want help getting up?” Joey asked.

Chris sighed and closed his eyes a moment. “If that gets people to leave me alone and some pain meds, I guess so.” He saw Joey frown. “Yeah, man. Help me up so I can fall out of bed again since it was so fun before.” Reaching up with his left arm, he gripped Joey's hand and grimaced when the pain hit him.

“I'm driving you to physical therapy, so you better get your ass up.”

Chris didn't ask about Melissa and Joey didn't offer an explanation. He saw Melissa stick her head in and look at the two of them as Chris sat drenched in sweat from the exertion of just getting up. “We'll be back before you get him home, Joey. Thanks again.” He frowned more when she didn't even say goodbye to him, the kids saying goodbye and Cam coming to hug his 'Uncle Chewy'. He watched Cam run off and looked at Joey. “Thanks..for coming I mean.”

“When your wife called me, she was in tears and wouldn't tell me why,” Joey said after a moment. “You know how I am about women crying. So do I need to beat the shit out of you or what?”

Chris looked away, hearing Joey's accent come out more. He could take his anger out on his wife, but he knew his friends wouldn't let him get away with it. “I...” he sighed. “I jumped Mel's ass earlier. And then again when she wanted to help me up. I told her to leave me the hell alone.”

“Yeah, because that's just what she needs from the man she loves. Not like she spent 8 months hearing she was a piece of shit from another guy,” Joey muttered.

“That was what? 8 years ago?” Chris said, defensive. “And like you're the official guru of marriage. You're like a damn doorknob. Everyone's had a turn...” When Joey didn't answer, Chris looked at him. Joey was pissed and he knew he'd hit below the belt.

“Let's get you to your appointment,” Joey said, getting up and offering Chris his hand. “I'll let it slide this time since obviously your brain has disconnected from the rest of you and you're being a fucking asshole to everyone.”

Chris didn't reply, getting up and getting around. Joey helped him get dressed and get his shoes on. “Do you know where Mel and the kids were going?” he asked as he went to the living room to grab his wallet and cell phone. It had been an adjustment to see out of one eye, depth perception was still a struggle but had gotten better thanks to occupational therapy.

“Back to school shopping,” Joey said. “They were having some good sales at Old Navy and Target. She said something about Cam going to pre-school for half a day since he was potty trained,” Joey watched Chris and prayed things would get better. He hurt for Chris, missing his happy go-lucky friend who saw humor in everything.

Chris nodded, remembering Melissa mentioning something about Cam going to pre-school. He hadn't thought about school starting for the girls either. If he was honest with himself, the last three months had been sort of a blur.

*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*

Coming in the door, the Kirkpatrick household was at normal, for the kids anyway. Kenna was watching television and Hadley was busy on her tablet with Cameron banging on the coffee table with drumsticks. He was exhausted and even more sore than when he left with Joey. And he had some news that his wife wouldn't be happy with. Even though he'd been a complete jerk, Chris realized that this was a big deal.

He could hear music coming faintly from the kitchen and went in there to see Melissa cooking dinner a little earlier than usual and smiled at hearing Britney Spears playing. “What's cooking good looking?” he said, his smile falling a bit when she didn't even look at him. “How was shopping?” he asked, hoping for an answer from that.

“It was fine, Chris. I'm fixing shrimp tacos and rice,” Melissa replied, chopping up some onion to cook with the shrimp. “How was therapy?”

“It hurt like a bitch...” he told her. Chris handed her a paper, looking sheepish. “Those are the exercises they said to do.”

Melissa looked at the paper and swallowed a lump of emotion. They were the same ones that she'd told him about. Her eyes flicked to his and then back to the paper. “That's good,” she responded simply. She wouldn't admit it, but she was exhausted. Dinner was going to be early and she was going to bed after getting baths and the kids settled. Her heart hurt from what Chris had said earlier, replaying his words over in her mind. She sprinkled a little taco seasoning on the shrimp and tossed them in the skillet with the onion, checking the rice.

“Joey gave me a good ass chewing for making you cry,” he told her, watching his wife try and ignore him. Chris didn't hear a sniffle but he saw his wife reach up quickly and wipe a tear. “Come on, Mel...Let me apologize. I had no right to bitch you out. I just..You were there.”

“So that makes it okay, Chris? I've spent the whole day wondering what the hell I'd done...I'm exhausted and you seem to think it's okay for me to be your personal punching bag.” Melissa wiped tears again and stirred the food, moving to put the tortillas in the oven. “I'll take a lot of it. I can't imagine what you're going through but if you think for one moment that I like hearing you talk like you'd rather be dead...” she pointed at Chris, trying to keep her voice down. “I can't deal with that. And then with Hadley-”

“I was wrong,” Chris interrupted Melissa. “I mean, she has right to be mad, but I'd already gotten on to her and then you did and it was...easier to yell at you. You always take it and never say anything. You have for three months. I'm sorry, Melly.”

She sucked in a breath and looked at Chris, reaching up to stroke the right side of his face. When he put his hand over hers, she shook her head a little. “You're still my husband. No matter how you see yourself, I love you.”

“I may never be able to use this hand for much,” Chris said, barely gripping her fingers with his right hand. “The physical therapist said I could gain back almost all of the strength in my leg and my arm and shoulder. There's more we need to talk about, but later..” he told his wife, letting her to go finish getting the food ready. “Need any help?” he asked, watching her.

“Just get the kids to wash their hands and come sit down,” she told Chris. When he left to go into the living room she sighed once more. It made her feel better that he'd apologized but still. A part of Melissa wondered if things would ever be like they were. It was sad to think about, figuring that it wouldn't.


*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^

“How's that?”

Chris nodded, feeling foolish laying in a sea of pillows, propped up in bed. However, he felt comfortable enough to try and sleep in his bed. A glance at the clock said it was just shy of 8:30. The kids had all went down without a fight, much to his and Mel's relief. They'd all been more tired than they let on. Also, Lance had come by after dinner to take the kids all to the park for a couple hours to run some of the energy out of them. So while they were gone, Melissa cleaned and Chris did his physical therapy exercises and took a shower. He'd smirked at his wife looking at him as she washed his legs. “You keep looking at me like I'm some hot commodity.”

“If I didn't think I'd hurt you, I'd try to ride you like a ten cent pony,” Melissa replied, causing him to groan.

“Baby, as great as sex sounds, I'm not sure I'm up for that. But the sentiment is noted,” he said. “Are you still mad at me?” Chris watched her pause a moment before she pushed him back under then hot water to wash the soap off.

“Not mad..just trying to appreciate the moment where you're in a good mood.” She moved and grabbed the towel when Chris turned the shower off. Standing still, she let him use her to step out of the shower, his limp more noticeable in his leg. “What did the doctor say?”

Chris hadn't replied and now as he laid in bed, he looked over at his wife. “He was recommending that we move somewhere warmer so that it won't aggravate my arthritis even more. Winters here would make everything a lot worse because of the cold and all of the metal I have in me. He said there was a good place in Orlando for physical therapy. And the weather is warmer.”

For a moment, Melissa wished she'd heard wrong or that Chris was kidding. “So..we need to move?” she asked quietly, looking at him. She wanted to argue or refuse; not wanting to leave New York City. She felt safe and her friends were here. Swallowing hard, Melissa rolled over away from Chris, letting tears fall.

“You don't have anything to say about it?” he asked, looking at her back. Chris felt bad when she turned back over and looked at him, tears streaming down her face.

“Don't make me out to be the bad guy. Do I want to move? Not really. I love our house and our friends...I feel safe here. And if I said no, that makes me seem like I don't care about you getting better. So we'll move. The only people I know in Orlando are Joey's parents.”

Chris sighed, not sure what to say. “I'm not trying to take you away from your friends, baby. And the kids have to switch schools. There's a lot to think about.”

“I know...” Melissa wasn't sure what else to say, feeling heartbroken. She felt like nothing that was happening was anything under her control. She'd want to move soon, before school started so the kids wouldn't have to change right after it started. Hadley would want to be involved in sports, so there was that to look at, and Kenna would adjust fine. Cameron wouldn't mind one way or the other. And Chris still had friends in Florida. The only one who was going to not be happy was her. And she'd have to just deal with it. Rolling back over, Melissa laid there in the darkness. Usually on nights where they went to bed early, Chris would hold her, singing to her softly. Now she listened to him try to get comfortable as she cried. Melissa felt like life was falling apart again and she was just along for the ride.

“Come on, baby, we have to get ready,” Melissa told Cameron who was trying his best not to get dressed. She got his shirt on and then some pants. “Don't give me that look your Daddy does..that one,” she said as Cam stuck out his bottom lip and batted his eyes.

She sighed and pushed back tears. Their things were all boxed up on a moving truck except for four large suitcases and a couple of carryons. They were flying from La Guardia to Orlando International Airport and moving into the house they'd bought just from seeing pictures online in a neighborhood that Chris had lived close to before he'd moved to New York. There were five bedrooms and four bathrooms, a spacious kitchen and a large famiy room and a pool. Melissa had tried to be optimistic, but she was having a hard time picturing a house with all their things in Florida.

“Are you ready?” Chris asked as he paused at the door, looking at his wife and son. He leaned on his cane and watched Cam be still to let her put his shoes on. He didn't miss the tear tracks on her face as she wiped them quickly and he felt bad. If he'd had a choice, he wouldn't have left NewYork. However, school was starting soon in Florida and they'd wanted Hadley and Kenna to be there at the beginning of the term.

“Yeah, come on Cam. Let's go make sure for the fifth time that we have everything to go to the airport and then the hotel for a couple days,” Melissa said, not looking at Chris.

Chris watched her go and give a long hug to Joey as he came in, frowning more. “Hey man,” he said, greeting his friend. “She hates me, I think,” he said softly, looking at the empty room. “It's not like I tried to get in a damn motorcycle wreck and screw up my life and everyone else's.”

“She's upset about moving. I don't think she hates you,” Joey pointed out. “If she hated you, Kirkpatrick, she wouldn't be moving to Florida. It's hotter than balls in a fur vest in summer down there right now.”

“Thanks for reminding me,” Chris said, moving slowly toward the front door, seeing Briahna, Kloey and Kelly talking to Melissa and the kids. “Lance and Addy came by earlier and said goodbye. You'd have thought we were moving to Mars...Lance looked like we'd kicked his puppy, holding on to Mel.”

“You know they're close,” Joey pointed out. “We'll miss crashing your place for impromptu cook outs and beers and shit, man. And there's the tour....” his voice trailed off, looking at Chris. “We tried to keep Johnny from scheduling a lot but we'd all lose a lot of money if we didn't tour the dates that were already set.”

“I know,” Chris said softly. “I can barely get around now with a cane. I can't dance and sure as hell don't want to look like the circus freak out for show,” he said. “I understand, man. You have to do what you have to do. It still sucks...” he told his friend.

“Dad, the taxi's here,” Hadley said loudly, grabbing her backpack with her things in it.

The girls been unhappy about moving until they'd told them about dance classes and the school they'd found that had plenty of sports. It was a private school close to their house, better than the public school that was father away. Chris hadn't wanted to pay for schooling but he couldn't deny that the girls would have a good education. So he'd relented.

Chris gave a small smile to Joey and hugged him. “Thanks, man. For everything...See you in Florida. Stop in when you're down visiting,” he told him, watching Hadley and Briahna hug.

“You know we'll be down and a pain in your ass...” Joey told him, moving to hug Melissa. He smirked and leaned in and kissed her cheek. “You know it would have never worked out between us, darling.”

Melissa giggled through her tears at his lame attempt at Captain Jack Sparrow and smacked his shoulder after she hugged him. “Kelly's going to shank you and dump your body in the Hudson now that I'm gone. And you won't have any cookies.”

“He just loves you for the cookies, Mel. You and I know that,” Kelly said, moving in to hug her. “Call me if you need anything. We'll be down in a month or so to see Joe and Phyllis and everyone. I'll bring you some real pizza and your second husband back to you,” she told Melissa as they both laughed.

“He's a good man but I prefer mine to be part machine, shorter and not as mouthy,” Melissa said, looking at Chris. She knew she couldn't linger there forever with the Fatones, standing just inside the empty house. The suitcases were loaded and kids situated then she helped Chris get in the front seat and she took the back. Melissa gave a small wave to their friends, biting her lip and hugging Kenna, who was trying not to cry.

“It's okay Kenniebear,” she whispered, kissing her daughter's hair. “We have a pool waiting for us and we'll get to decorate your room how you want.”

Chris heard the quiet conversation and looked at his family. He just prayed that things would get better for them; for him. He'd not mentioned that the doctor had upped his anti-depressants again. It would only make Melissa worry more than she did already. And there was enough guilt on his mind that he just wanted a little time to sort things out. He hoped that would happen in Florida.

*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*

“Welcome to Florida,” Joe Senior said as he met them at the terminal. He frowned at Chris and Melissa, one of them looking mad at the other tired. “Let's get your things and get you all to the hotel,” he offered as Chris nodded.

“The sooner I can get off this leg, the better it will be,” he said, nodding when Joey's dad told him where Phyllis was parked in hour parking near the door. He took Kenna and Hadley with him, letting them lead him through the crowd.

“How was the flight?” he asked Melissa who was wiping tears. He walked with her to the baggage claim, Cameron asleep in his stroller.

“Between a son who cried and got sick three times, a husband who hurt the whole time and two girls who didn't want to stay in their seats, it was lovely,” she said softly, shaking her head. “I just want to get everyone fed, and bathed and in bed including Chris...Thank you for picking us up,” Melissa added as she got two of the bags and Joe, Sr got the other two.

“You're family, you know that.”

*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*

“Momma, I want a bath first,” Hadley said, dropping her carry on onto one of the beds.

“No, I want to go first, you went first last night,” Kenna retorted, glaring at her sister as her bag fell next to the bed.

“Let me help your Daddy get comfortable and then we will figure out what we're doing,” Melissa told the girls as she quickly set up Cameron's pack n play. They had a room with a suite, that meant a couch that folded out into a bed and two queen size beds. She put Cam down, thankful he'd fallen asleep ten minutes before they'd landed and would be out for hopefully another hour for his nap.

“Girls, quit arguing,” Chris told Hadley and Kenna, who were still shoving one another. He was covered in sweat from exertion and hurting. He watched Melissa put Cam down and he got up slowly and limped torward the bathroom. “Tell your Momma to come help me,” he told the girls, thankful they'd turned on the television and had gotten quiet.

“I heard,” Melissa said as she opened up her and Chris' suticase, grabbing clothes and toiletries and medicine. “If Cam wakes up, come tell me,” she told Hadley, who nodded before following Chris in the bathroom. She could tell her husband wasn't in the mood to talk, getting his clothes off him and helping him into the shower.

“You're going to have to help me today,” Chris said, sighing when the hot water hit his body. He leaned on the shower wall and closed his eyes. He opened them again when Melissa asked him to move, frowning at the tears she was blinking back. “I'm sorry baby,” he said, watching her wipe under her eyes quickly.

“It's alright, Chris. I'm just tired. We're all tired,” she replied softly. “What do you want for dinner?” she asked him, knowing they would just order something instead of going out.

“Honestly, I just want some pain pills for dinner,” Chris told her, groaning when she used her fingernails on his scalp. “That feels so good.”

Melissa smiled, doing it a few minutes longer before shutting the water off. “Minus the three kids and all of the suitcases, I don't think I've been this tired since the night of our wedding...” she said, helping Chris dry off.

“We didn't fall into bed until almost five in the morning and had to be up in three hours to catch a flight to Turks and Caicos,” Chris told her, giving her a small smile at the memory.

“Why is the alarm going off?”Chris groused as he opened one eye and looked at the time. He shut it off with his left hand, catching a glimpse of his wedding band. The black tunsten band still felt foreign to him, but right. It made him happy, kissing his wife's forehead as she snuggled up closer to him. “We have about half an hour,” he half whispered, kissing her once more.

“Good, so I can sleep,” Melissa mumbled, pulling her husband's arms around her. “We can be freaks in the sheets later, Kirkpatrick.”

“I better write this down. The woman who can't ever get enough of the ol' man wants to sleep. Come on, Weston,” he smirked, snaking a hand up Melissa's shirt and caressing a breast. “I mean, Kirkpatrick.”

“I'm going to remember that,” she told Chris, moaning softly when he tugged on a nipple. “Chris.” Her voice came out like a whine and she tried to glare at him, unsuccessful at being mad.

“Yes, my love?” he half whispered, his lips meeting hers once more. Chris didn't figure they'd do much sight seeing the first week, which was why he was going to surprise his wife with a second week on their honeymoon. She didn't need to know that now; giving a tug on Chris' hair, making him growl. “I thought you wanted sleep.”

“Kiss me and be nice.”

They both heard the girls arguing and sighed. It had been a long time since they'd had a night to themselves and the way it was now, it was hard to know if that would happen for a while, if ever.

“Help me with my shirt and I can get my shorts on,” Chris told her, standing there in his underwear. “I just want to go lay on the bed. Girls, enough!” he hollered and heard it get a little quieter and then a cry from Cameron. “Go make sure the kids don't kill one another. I'll manage,” he said, squeezing his wife's hand.

“Alright,” Melissa told him, going out of the bathroom. Kenna and Hadley were bouncing up and down on the bed she was going to sleep in. “Do you jump on the bed at home?” she asked them as she passed to get Cameron, who was trying to get out of his pack n play.

“Only when Daddy lets us and you aren't home,” Kenna answered before her sister could shush her.

“Thanks for ratting me out, K,” Chris said as he went to the other bed. “After this moment, no jumping on any bed or my belt will find your behind. Got it?” he told them, sitting down on the bed across from the girls.

“Yes, Dad,” they both answered as Cam ran to Chris after getting free.

“Hey bubba. Did you have a good nap?” Chris asked Cam who held his arms up.

“Up, Dadda. Up..” Cam insisted, frowning when Chris didn't immediately move. He looked from him to Melissa.

Melissa frowned and lifted Cam up on to the bed. “Daddy can't lift you, baby. At least not yet,” she told Cameron as he went over to love on Chris. She smiled at Cameron hugging on his Daddy. “How about we order a pizza and some hot wings?” she suggested, getting a resounding yes from the girls and even Chris. She put in an order and added bread sticks with marinara sauce. “They said it will be about forty minutes.”

Chris grimaced when Cam grabbed his fingers. “Yeah, I doubt I'll last that long. Just save me some food for later,” he said, pulling his right hand away. “Take him, Mel. I'm not in the mood to keep moving around a lot.” Chris frowned when Cam thought it was a game and bent Chris' fingers.

“No baby,” Mel cood, taking Cameron and putting him down. “Want help?” she asked Chris, who shook his head. “I'll wake you up in an hour or so for food.”

“If I'm passed out good, let me sleep,” Chris said, moving slowly and pulling the covers back. “I'd rather have sleep than food at this point.”

Melissa was thankful there was another smaller television in the suite. She moved the girls and Cameron to the couch in there where it was more quiet for her husband. Or at least not blaring the television with some annoying cartoon. At least that was something she could be thankful for.

She wasn't sure about anything at that moment, just happy they weren't on a plane. “Welcome to Orlando. Where everything's made up and the points don't matter,” she muttered, sitting down on the bed with a sigh. Melissa looked over at Chris sleeping and wished this was a dream that she could wake up from and find herself back in New York.

“Can we go swimming?” Hadley and Kenna asked, bored with unpacking boxes. “Please, Dad,” they looked at Chris, hopeful.

Chris sat in his chair in the kitchen and opened another box marked 'dishes' and grimaced when he straightened his back. “Not today, girls. Probably tomorrow, depending on if your mother and I can move,” he said, watching Melissa put things up, muttering to herself.

The kitchen was big, but the layout wasn't what he expected. It was a galley kitchen and while it had plenty of counter space, there was a cut off feeling from the rest of the house. They could do some remodeling, but for now it would have to work.

“Here's more cups, babe,” he said, watching Cameron who was playing in the living room with a wooden spoon and an empty box. He looked at his daughters, who were still standing there. “Did you get your toys picked up and put up?”

That was the first thing they did was help the girls get their rooms somewhat situated, along with the jack and jill bathroom between their rooms. Besides the movers putting the furniture in the correct room, Melissa had done most of the work. Chris had helped some, but he was already exhausted.

“Not all of them..there's still boxes,” Hadley said with a shrug. “Come on Kenna. We won't get to swim anyway.”

“The pool will still be there tomorrow,” Chris said with a sigh and got up slowly with the help of his cane. “I can't sit in this chair anymore, Mel. It's killing my back,” he told her. “I'll go supervise the girls and help them put their stuff up.”

“Okay...” Melissa replied, knowing there were things that wouldn't fit in this kitchen. And she wasn't going to ask Chris to sit longer. He'd already helped more than she thought he would have been able to. If he hadn't have gotten hurt...Her mind couldn't help but go there, angry that nothing seemed to be going the way it should have.

They'd sold his other motorcycle and gotten insurance money for the other. Chris had acted indifferent about it before they'd moved, but she knew he missed it. She did too, if truth be told. They'd spent a lot of hours on his motorcycles, going to different places. One of the first places they'd gone was to Poughkeepsie, New York for a project for culinary school.

That had been one of the first times they'd gone out after they were 'officially' together. Melissa couldn't remember a more fun time and it had been the beginning of weekend trips to different places. When she'd asked why he always took her places, Chris told her it was because he enjoyed watching her reaction when he'd tell her to pack a bag.

*^*^^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*

“What are you doing?” Chris asked, sneaking up behind Melissa and kissing her cheek, watching her dice up mushrooms and onions.

“What does it look like I'm doing, Kirkpatrick? You always enjoy eating and I like cooking so...” her voice trailed off and she grinned at him. “I missed you.”

“I was only gone a few hours, babe. How can you miss me?” he raised an eyebrow at her when she stuck her tongue out at him. “Be nice...” Chris chuckled when Melissa made a noise and shook her head at him. “I also need you to pack a bag for this weekend.”

“How big of a bag?” Melissa asked, putting the vegetables with some minced garlic in the skillet, stirring it around with some oil.

“It doesn't matter,” he told her with a shrug. “Just make sure you're ready to go by tomorrow around two,” Chris added, loving the confused look she gave him. “Enough clothes for a long weekend, baby. Five days or so...” he explained, watching her cook. “Want me to do anything?”

“If you want to make some lemonade or tea..grab a couple beers,” Melissa shrugged, kissing Chris. “Now you've got me curious as to where we're going.”

“Don't start that, Weston. It's a surprise,” he replied, kissing her once more.

“Momma,” Cameron said, distracting Mel from her thoughts and pulling on her pants for her to pick him up.

“Hi baby...” she said, picking Cam up and kissing him, smiling when he snuggled into her. “It's someone's nap time.” She carried him to his bedroom that was still mostly in boxes except for his bed. Melissa got him changed and laid down, watching Cam drift off to sleep. Things seemed so simple for their son, that he didn't have the worries she did. The girls for the most part, were naive as well, just knowing that they had to move for Chris to get better. Her mind went back to what she'd been thinking about before.


“You're acting suspicious,” she told him, giving him a look.

Chris feined indignation and stared at his girlfriend. “Suspicious? I always do stuff like this and this time I'm acting suspiciouus? Weston, the last time I whisked you away for a weekend, we spent it holed up in a cabin in the Rocky Mountains in Colorado. I didn't hear any complaining other than you didn't want to leave.” He chuckled at a blush coming to Melissa's cheeks.

Melissa sighed and tried to not overthink anything. “Fine. I'm sorry. I'm overthinking things and it's making me a stick in the mud.” She leaned over and kissed Chris' scruffy cheek. “I love you, Kirkpatrick.”

“I know.”

Her eyes focused and the memory faded as she heard her husband grunt as he walked down the hall. She moved from Cam's room to see Chris moving slowly to their bedroom. “Need help?” she asked softly.

“If you're volunteering to cut off my right side, that would be awesome,” Chris said through gritted teeth as he limped. “Who the hell said we needed to move? Oh right, that would be me...The person who can't do a fucking thing except open boxes with a box knife. Hooray.”

“You helped a lot today, don't be so hard on yourself, Kirkpatrick,” Melissa said, going into their room behind him. The bed had been set up but not made, boxes still everywhere. “Let me make the bed real quick and then you can take some pain pills and rest, okay?” She didn't miss the heave of his shoulders and pissed off look that he tried to mask.

“Fuck the bed. I'll go back out to the chair,” he snipped, leaning on his cane. “Damn it. I hate this shit,” Chris muttered, looking down. “Why did you agree to move here, Mel?” he asked after a moment. “I mean...you have everything to do with no real help. I've got maybe a couple hours in me..four if I take pain meds. You know no one here except a couple people. It's hot as shit...” he moved and sat down gingerly on the mattress. “You should have just kept you and the kids in New York.”

“And let you come to Florida by yourself? That's the dumbest thing I've heard you say in a while...I couldn't do that. I'm your ride or die bitch,” she told Chris matter of factly as she sat down next to him and slipped her arm into his. “You're my Prince Charming. Or maybe Shrek.”

Chris couldn't help but smile a little. He was still hurting and pissy, but he knew his wife was right. Some women might have left, but she was still there with him. It meant a lot. He squeezed her hand gently. “I'd say Shrek for sure. A mean, old, smelly ogre.”

“Then let me help you up so I can make the bed. We labeled the boxes and I found the sheets and pillowcases and pillows, because if you try to sleep in your chair you will be Shrek and I will find a pitchfork.”

Melissa gave him a small smile and was surprised when Chris leaned in and kissed her. It wasn't that he wasn't affectionate, but since the accident physical affection hadn't been as frequent. Her hand went up and stroked his cheek lightly, starting to deepen the kiss when he pulled away.

“Get the bed made, babe. Please,” Chris said, pretending to not notice the disappointment on her face as Melissa nodded and got up. He wouldn't admit this to his wife, but he still felt like a circus freak when he looked in the mirror. When he kissed her and she tried to keep things going, he was afraid of getting too carried away and things not going right, so he stopped it before then. Melissa hadn't complained any, the kids and him keeping her busy, he figured. Heaving himself off the bed, he watched it get made and take the offered pills with some water. “Thanks, Weston. I love you.”

Melissa gave him a small smile, praying she wouldn't cry. “Love you too. Get some rest.” She turned and left Chris alone in their room, making it to his recliner before covering her mouth and letting out a small sob and tears fall. It wasn't just the kiss. It was everything. Melissa missed the old Chris. She knew it wasn't fair to think that, since he'd never be 'old Chris' again, but she did. The man who would cop a feel while she was cooking dinner or send a text and ask what color panties she had on. Now she couldn't even hardly kiss him. It seemed like a whole different life, thinking back.

“Chris,” a moan came from Melissa as he kissed her neck, pushing her against the front door of their apartment. “You said we were going...” her voice trailed off as his mouth found hers. She smiled when he ignored her, deepening the kiss. When he'd come out in his leather chaps and leather motorcycle jacket and their weekend bags, Melissa had swallowed hard as she looked him over. That had started the make out session.

“We'll go when I'm done,” he murmured, giving her a look as he kissed her again. It was about to get too cold to ride his motorcycle and Chris wanted to take her out for one last ride of the season. Not only that, but his girlfriend didn't have to know that.

*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^**

“It's so gorgeous out,” Melissa said loudly to Chris who nodded as they rode down backroads in upstate New York. It was a little chilly but it wasn't raining and the sun and clouds moved back and forth with the fall foilage being at its height. She loved this time with Chris. He'd worked hard to get her to relax and enjoy the weekends when he wrecked all of her plans to drag her with him to a performance or just out for a trip for the two of them.

Chris pulled over at an overlook, waiting until Melissa was off the Harley to swing his leg get over and get off. “Damn. Getting old sucks,” he groused, his knee throbbing slightly, but taking his girlfriend's hand. “Come on, Weston, let's go see if I can get you to get close to the actual over look,” he teased, knowing she didn't like heights.

“It doesn't look that bad. And you're not old, Chris,” Melissa told him, squeezing his hand. It actually was high up and she paused when they got close.

“Come on, Mel...I won't let you go over the edge. It has a barrier,” he added, watching her follow him slowly. “Besides, we have to get a picture,” he said as she nodded, getting her phone out of her pocket of her zippered leather jacket. He was glad they'd made it a 'thing' to take a selfie whenever they went out somewhere. Chris watched her fiddle with it, turning the camera around to face them and kissed her cheek as she snapped a picture. “I love you.”

“I love you too, you crazy man,” Melissa said, intending to take another picture after she sent that one to Addy with a smiley face. “Let's get one more,” she told him as she got the camera ready. It was then she noticed that Chris was down on one knee behind her. “What in the world are you doing?”

Chris smiled as he watched his girlfriend realize what was going on, blinking back tears himself when she gasped as he pulled out the emerald and diamond ring that had been with him for almost a year and a half. “I was going to wait until we were at the restaurant tonight, but you know me,” he said with a small smile and continued, “I never thought I woud find someone who would love me for just being me. That I could love them back just as much, or more. Marry me, baby?”

“Oh my god...Christopher Alan,” Melissa said through tears, looking at him and the ring. “Yes, I'll marry you,” she answered, kissing him softly,her hands stroking his face.

“Now that you said yes, help me up,” Chris said with a smile after putting the ring on her finger. He grimaced when he got up but didn't mind the pain at all. “Now take another picture with me, Weston.”

This time, when Melissa took the picture she held up her hand and smiled, with Chris making a surprised face, the ring clearly visable.

'And I will take you in my arms, and hold you right where you belong, til the day my life is through, this I promise you... He proposed, I said yes' she sent off a few minutes later to her parents and Chris' family.

That had been one of the happiest moments of her life, save for getting married and children. Melissa sighed when she looked around the living room and things to put up. Her phone rang and she heard 'Summer Nights' play, but didn't have the heart to answer and talk to the person on the other end. She had too much to do, and unlike Danny and Sandy, she didn't figure she'd get the time to get those moments back that were now just memories.

“Hi, I'm Kiley,” the tall brunette said with a smile. “You've got to be my 9 o' clock appointment. Chris Kirkpatrick right?”

Chris nodded, a little dumbstruck at the woman talking to him. It had been a long time since he'd seen a woman who was just naturally beautiful. She was wearing makeup, but not enough to be obnoxious. “Yeah, I'm Chris, nice to meet you Kiley,” he said, glancing over at his wife who was sitting in the waiting area engrossed in something on her phone. Melissa's hair was pulled up in her usual messy ponytail, no make up and a t shirt and some capris. Something she'd woken up and thrown on.

“There is no way you're almost 54. Maybe 44,” Kiley said, reading over Chris' chart.

“Ha ha ha..My body tells me every day I feel about 80,” he told her, liking the slight flirting. Chris had slightly accepted how he looked, liking the compliment on his age. “So, you're new here?” he asked, not having seen her before.

“Yes, I got transferred from Miami to here,” Kiley said, instructing Chris to do his stretches. “Who brings you to therapy every day?”

“My wife. She's sitting in the waiting area,” Chris told the younger woman.

“Oh, that's nice. What else does she do?” Kiley asked, helping Chris stretch and then to start walking on the treadmill for a few minutes.

“Not much,” Chris muttered, sighing. He'd spent the weekend trying to help his wife with some housework and by Sunday it was a moot point. The kids made messes faster than it could be kept clean and Melissa had spent part of Sunday night in bed with a migraine. He'd given up after that, leaving wet laundry in the laundry basket for someone else to deal with. Dinner had been box macaroni and cheese with hamburger meat and taco seasoning along with some green beans. A far cry from a more home cooked meal that he was used to.

“Well, I'm sure she's busy,” Kiley told him. “Do you have kids?”

“Yeah, our oldest is going to be 8, then 7 and an almost 3 year old,” he said, telling her about the kids. “Do you have any kids?”

Kiley gave Chris a shy smile and shook her head. “No. Haven't found the right person I guess...All the good ones are taken.”

Chris knew a line when he heard one. Instead of feeling slightly uncomfortable, it made him smile slightly. “Well, I'm sure it will happen for you. You never know who you'll meet.”


Melissa didn't miss the smile on her husband's face and the physical therapist helping him. Actually she was talking and touching Chris a little too much for Melissa's liking. However, after the weekend had went abysmal, it wasn't worth it to fight about this small thing. Hopefully the woman would be assigned to someone else tomorrow. Along with that, there was the fact that both clean and dirty clothes were scattered everywhere from the kids trying to 'help' with laundry. So her outfit had been quickly chosen and make up was something she looked at longingly before running out of the bathroom to take care of Chris or the kids.

“You're sure chipper,” Melissa told Chris after therapy, not able to keep her mouth shut. She watched her husband pretend to ignore her as he buckled up.

“I don't know what you're talking about,” Chris huffed, turning away slightly. “She was just a new person..I'm a friendly guy. What's wrong with that?”

“If she touched you any more, I'd have asked her for dollar bills to stuff them in your pants, Chris. You spent more time laughing and talking than you did getting any therapy done,” Melissa told him as they made their way home.

“At least she did something,” Chris said. “The house looks worse than it did Friday. I even helped you clean and nothing still got done. I mean, what good is it for you to not work if you can't get anything else done? I don't have to have a babysitter, Mel.”

Melissa bit her lip and kept driving, willing herself not to cry. “You know what, you're right. I'll go to work and then no one will be there to pick up Cam or the girls from school or take them to dance class. Or Hads to whatever sport she's playing.”

“I'm just saying...you could try a little harder. I'm trying to relearn how to use half of my body.”

Melissa pulled into the driveway and looked at Chris. “Fine. I'll try harder. Excuse me I'm not young and hot and bat my eyes at you like that girl did. Anytime I try, you pull away and make some excuse. It's not for lack of me trying in that department.”

Chris winced when Melissa slammed the car door and went into the house, leaving him sitting outside in the car. He knew he wasn't being fair to her. That thought left though when he thought of Kiley promising to see him tomorrow, giggling when he'd told her Bye Bye Bye.

*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^

“Hi honey, how are you?” Cathie's voice said to her daughter, hearing Cameron yelling in the background for 'Nana'. “How's my baby boy?”

“Cam's fine. The girls are fine...” Melissa said, pinching the bridge of her nose to keep from crying. “Mom, am I not trying hard enough?” she asked after a moment, willing her voice not to crack. She was sitting in the car with Cameron while the girls had dance class for an hour.

“What do you mean, not trying hard enough? You're doing everything you can...Taking care of your kids and your husband. Who said you weren't?”

“Chris seems to think I'm not doing enough,” Melissa told her softly. “I mean, I'm really struggling with everything and now he says that. He's never been mean before, Momma.”

Cathie Weston heard the sadness in her daughter's voice and frowned. She didn't know what to tell her, knowing that her son in law was dealing with a lot mentally and physically. However, Melissa was her daughter and it broke her heart to hear her upset. “You know everything happens for a reason. And I can't imagine what you and Chris are going through still...I'm sure he loves you, he's just looking at everything differently now.”

Melissa bit her lip and nodded. “ I need to go Mom. Thanks for listening even for a few minutes,” she said, telling her mother she loved her.

Her phone beeped and she saw it was from Chris.

'Don't worry about dinner 4 me. Heated up leftovers...again'

Tears pricked Melissa's eyes as she looked at her phone. She'd meant to get out a roast to put in the crock pot and left it in the freezer. And she needed to go to the grocery store. Mel sighed, shaking her head.

'I'm sorry'

There wasn't an answer until she was getting out of the car to get the girls and it made her even more upset.

'Don't bother, Mel. I'm going to bed in the guest room'

The kids were good for the most part as she traipsed through the store a little while later, getting food. Melissa got everything to make an apple pie and some pinwheels, something she hadn't made in a long time.

“Mom, are you and Dad getting a divorce?” Hadley asked in the middle of check out.

Melissa froze, looking from the cashier to her oldest daughter who was looking to her intently waiting for an answer.

“No, Hads, what make you ask?” Melissa said as the cashier kept ringing up items.

“Cause one of the girls at school said when her Mom and Dad quit talking and kissing and stuff that they decided to get a divorce. And that her Daddy moved away,” she said matter of factly. “An' she said since Daddy's famous, she said he'd not want us anymore.”

“Hads...” Melissa warned, closing her eyes and swallowing hard before looking at her 3 kids. “Let's get our groceries and go home, okay? No one's going anywhere....Daddy and I are alright.”

“But you and Daddy don't kiss anymore,” Kenna spoke up as Hadley nodded.

Melissa wasn't sure how she managed to get all the kids to the car and help the carry out person get the food in their car and get home. It was a gut punch and took her breath when she thought about it. It was true. She and Chris hadn't been affectionate like they'd been before Chris got hurt. It had been disappointing at first, but now Melissa realized she was trying to ignore it. In doing so, the kids were seeing their parent's relationship suffer.

Not only that, but Melissa had started going to counseling while Chris was at physical therapy. She knew that Kiley was still working there and that her husband always smiled now when he came out to the car. It felt like a competition; one that she was losing.

Once the kids were in bed, Melissa started putting up the rest of the groceries that didn't need to go into the freezer or fridge. Before starting, she'd went in to check on Chris, who was sound asleep in the guest room like he'd said. Mel caught a reflection of herself in the mirror on the dresser in there and paused. She looked exhausted. More than that, she looked sad. Her clothes looked like she'd dug through a plastic bag to find them. It had been so easy to get into the habit of finding something to wear without thinking about it. Just trying to survive the day and make it through had been the plan. She stared at the mirror image of herself and didn't blame Chris for looking at another woman, at least for a split second. While putting up food, she hit play on Spotify, hoping that music would help her mood.

'Where are you now, when I need you around? ...I gave my best it wasn't enough, you get upset, we argue too much, we made a mess of what used to be love..You say it's better if we love each other seperately...' Usher sang as Melissa let tears fall from her face. She put up everything else and then grabbed the blanket and laid down on the couch. It had been hard enough to sleep in the bed without Chris there when he was at the hospital, but she wasn't even going to try when he was just a couple rooms away.

*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*

Chris got up and sat on the guest room bed, looking around. It still had boxes from moving sitting in there. A lot of them were kitchen things. He'd not realized in moving how little space there actually was in the kitchen. He'd felt bad that he and Melissa hadn't flown down to Orlando to actually look at the house, but it worked at least for now. Chris grabbed his phone to look at the time. It was almost 4 in the morning but hadn't slept well since around midnight.

Getting up, Chris made his way to the master bedroom, frowning when he turned on the bathroom light and there was no sign of Melissa in their bed. The comforter hadn't even been disturbed and his mind went back to coming home and finding a note from her saying that she'd left. He knew that wasn't the case, that she was home and the kids were all asleep. That still made him pause a moment, going to look and finding her asleep on the couch. He watched her sleep, her face still looking upset and he frowned when she said his name softly.

He should have woken his wife up and comforted her, asked what dream she was having, but didn't. Chris sighed, knowing later in the morning it would be the same as it was the day before. He never asked where his wife went while he was at therapy and she never asked him any more about Kiley. It was the only bright spot in his day. Well, that and his kids coming home from school. All the medication he was taking and dealing with Melissa seemed like the time before the accident was a lifetime instead of just months.

Walking back to the bedroom, he gave thought to asking Melissa for a separation. It would be easier on them both, at least in his way of thinking. She could have the kids and not have to worry about him. Chris wouldn't feel guilty about another woman being on his mind and the thoughts he'd given to being unfaithful. Kiley had expressed more than just a passing interest in him and more than once mentioned meeting up for drinks. He'd declined every time, but lately it seemed like a more promising thing.

You're up early,” Melissa told Chris, surprised at seeing him in their bathroom as she was going to get ready for the day. “Happy Birthday” she told him, giving him a smile as he brushed his teeth. She frowned when he just nodded and didn't even get a muffled 'Thanks' in return.

“Do you want to go out for breakfast before your appointment?” she asked after he'd spit the toothpaste out and rinsed his mouth off. Melissa had cancelled her appointment for that day, wanting to spend time with Chris.

“I already have breakfast plans...Sorry, babe,” he said, watching her in the mirror. Chris wondered if she'd ask. Or if she would shrug and go on, leaving him to his own thoughts.

“So what are those plans?” Melissa asked after a moment, not sure who he'd be meeting up with.

“Kiley said she'd take me out after therapy for breakfast if I wanted. I know you weren't going to be there so I told her yes. It's not a big deal,” he said with a shrug. He turned to watch his wife glare at him, chewing on her bottom lip.

“Do you know where I go while you're at physical therapy, Chris? Do you even have a clue? Because you've never asked. I keep waiting on you to ask, but you don't. I'm going to see my own therapist. I go lay on a couch for an hour and try to work out all of my feelings while I know you're flirting with another woman,” she told him, her voice breaking with emotion. “You get so mad at me for not getting housework done. Or for not cooking every night....Do you not realize what I do?” When he ddn't answer, she continued her voice getting louder. “I make sure our children are dressed and fed before I take them to school and preschool five days a week. I come home and help you get ready for your appointment. I go to my therapy appointment. I come home and pay bills, I make sure we have groceries, I do yard work. I answer mail and calls because fans want to know how Chris Kirkpatrick is doing since he decided to become anti social to everyone. I do the work of 2 people, Chris. You used to help with the kids and laundry and housework...”

“I've helped with housework,” Chris said, glaring at her.

“One or two days isn't going to magically fix everything. You know what? Don't worry about it. Happy fucking birthday,” Melissa said, leaving him standing in the bathroom.

Chris snorted and rolled his eyes, going out of their bathroom. He paused when he saw a Steelers jersey laying on the bed and a couple of boxes wrapped in comic book character wrapping paper. He picked up the envelope and studied his wife's handwriting. Swallowing, Chris put it down and got dressed, going out to his chair. There he found another envelope with Hadley's handwriting and a wrapped present as well.

“Daddy are you gonna open your presents?” Kenna asked as she came out of her room, holding her shoes. “Momma let us pick them out,” she said with a proud smile.

“Yeah, Kenniebear. I'm waiting until Hads and Cam are in here too,” he said.

“Are you letting Momma take you to Pittsburgh?”

Chris was confused until he thought about the presents on the bed. “Oh..I..I don't know Kenna,” he said softly, noticing when Melissa came into the living room that she didn't even look at him, going to their bedroom and shutting the door.

Melissa sat against the door and cried, listening to the kids telling Chris happy birthday and the excited noises of them watching him open presents. She wasn't sure what to think or do, getting dressed and ready to take them to school. She saw that her husband hadn't even opened her presents to him, which was just as well, she thought.

“Joey's dad will be here in half an hour to take you to your appointment,” Melissa told Chris as she herded kids out the door. It broke her heart to think about what he'd be doing afterward, trying hard not to care she'd been pushed aside.

“Why aren't you taking Daddy?” Hadley asked when they got into the car. She didn't miss much when it came to her parents.

“Because Daddy has other plans for today, Hads. So I have other plans,” Melissa answered simply. “I'll be there to pick you up from school, okay.” She gave the kids a small smile knowing she had to keep it together for them.

“Love you, Momma,” Cam said, giving her a smile that was just like Chris'.

“Love you too, Cam,” Melissa said, wiping a tear quickly.

**^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^**^*^*^*^*^*^*^

Chris had ten minutes until Joe, Sr got there. He sat on the bed and opened the envelope that had his name on it. A birthday card was tucked in there, along with tickets to a Pittsburgh Steelers game in November.

'Surprise! I guess this year I'll cheer for 'your' team. I love you, Kirkpatrick. Love, Melly'

Chris put the card down and opened one of the presents. He stared at the object in his hands and felt a knot grow in his stomach. It was Melissa's diary she'd gotten back before they were married. She'd written it in when Derek had taken her and then kept writing in it afterward. She'd jokingly told Chris she'd give it to him when she'd filled it.

Now he wasn't sure if he wanted to read it or not, skimming through a few pages. He set it down and grabbed the other package. It was about the same size as the journal but Chris had no idea what it might be. It was a box of custom guitar picks from his favorite place to get intruments with a note from the owner of the small store in Nashville, Tennessee.

'Chris, Happy Birthday man. Your wife has gifted you with these guitar picks and we've thrown in the guitar when you get ready to play again. Just give us a call and let us know when you're in town to come by and pick out the guitar you want. Cheers, Greg'
Chris flexed his right hand and watched his fingers bend. It had hurt at first and he still had no feeling in his middle finger but they worked enough to grip things now for small periods of time. He swallowed hard when he realized what Melissa had done. She was making him do what he loved, whether he liked it or not. A knock at the front door paused any other thoughts he had, getting up and making his way to answer the door.

“Hey, Joe. Thanks for taking me today,” Chris said, making sure he had his wallet and phone along with a house key.

“Not a problem. Melissa called and said something had come up...” Joe didn't say anything else as they got into the car. “Any big plans today?”

“Nope. Just coming back to the house...”

“Oh. Melissa said something about you having a breakfast date. With her?”

Chris shook his head no, looking over at Joe at a red light. “With..a friend.”

“A friend?” Joe looked at Chris, raising an eyebrow but didn't say anything when the other man nodded.

*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*

“Are you not eating?” Kiley asked Chris, watching him push food around on his plate. “I mean, I thought you were excited about this,” she said, frowning a little.

“Sorry...” Chris sighed and took a bite of his omelette. “I'm having a good time. Thanks for taking me out.”

“You're welcome. I'm glad we got some time alone that's not at my work,” she said with a big smile. She'd known Chris for over a couple months and they'd connected quickly in that time. “No one complained you were going out today?” she questioned, watching Chris shake his head.

He looked down at his phone that dinged and lit up with text messages before he could reply.

'Happy birthday asshat' from Joey

'Old man...HBD fucker' Justin

'Someone said it was your birthday. I had to look on caveman drawings to check' JC

'Have a great day today. We miss you. Actually I miss Mel more than you, but it's only cause she's prettier. Happy Birthday!' from Lance and it made Chris pause. He scrolled back up and saw Facebook notifications as well as Twitter.

Chris swallowed hard when he saw one he'd missed earlier.

'melly82: Happy Birthday to the worst patient I've ever had to take care of. I love you @IamCKirkpatrick.' Attached was a picture from a month ago that Hadley took of them. Chris was pretending to snarl at Melissa as she kissed his cheek.

Below that was a reply from one of his sisters.

@melly82 @IamCKirkpatrick @itstaylor: Ewwwww, kids look at this stuff. ;) Get a room. And Happy Birthday I guess, big bro. Still like Mel more than you. hehehe

He looked up at Kiley who was staring at him. “Sorry,” he said, putting his phone down.

“So did you want to do something after this? We could go to a movie or back to my place...”

Chris paused at the question. He glanced down at his wedding ring. It hadn't moved in over ten years. He'd worn it other than his time in the hospital. Flirting and going to breakfast was one thing. Going back to Kiley's place was something else entirely. She was pretty. She had no other responsibilities except for work and taking care of her own obligations.

“I...I can't...” Chris said softly, looking at her. “I mean, you're a nice girl,Kiley-”

“I get it Chris,” she replied with a small smile. “You're married. Most guys wouldn't care..I didn't think you'd even be interested in me. She's lucky as hell to have you.”

“Not that lucky. I'm out with you and not her,” Chris said, throwing a couple of twenties down on the table to pay for their meal and leave a tip.

“I'm sure she still considers herself lucky,” Kiley told Chris. They got out to the parking lot and she leaned in and kissed him softly on the lips. “Happy Birthday.”

“Thanks,” Chris said, not sure how to feel as they went to her car. He glanced around the parking lot and froze for a second. Melissa was sitting there in the pick up parking spot, staring at him. She'd seen the kiss. He didn't do anything except get in Kiley's car. “Take me home, Kiley,” he said softly.

Chris had no idea what was going to happen, but he figured whatever it was that it wouldn't be good. While his wife was trying her best to do everything to save their marriage, he'd managed to tear it apart in a matter of a few seconds. The song playing on the radio seemed to ironically mimic real life.

'Let it rain, let it pour, she don't love me anymore, let it come down on me, let it come down on me...Let it rain.”