“Hey honey, would you bring me my list?”
JC Claus sat back in his oversized wing-back chair, sipping his spiked hot chocolate.
“Here you go, sir,” a curvy woman in a skimpy yet still tasteful elf outfit said as she handed JC a leather-bound book of names written in gorgeous calligraphy.
“Thank you, honey,” JC said with a toothy grin.
“Ah now, let’s take a look at who’s been naughty this year,” he said.
Santa had his red suit and nice list, and JC had his hot pink suit, complete with white faux fur lining, and a naughty list.
Each year, thousands of women and quite a few men worked the entire year to make JC Claus’ naughty list.
“Oh ho ho,” JC said with a smirk and a laugh that came from his chest, “She’s stepped it up this year,” looking through the list.
JC had a pretty good gig. For the last few years he was in charge of awarding the naughtiest women - and men - around the world with their fantasies. The naughtier they were, the better their gift.
From lingerie and sleepwear that leaves little to the imagination to a special visit from JC Claus, the presents varied, but all were very carefully selected.
Logan Comtome had the distinction of being JC’s head elf and was in charge of assessing the list before it got to JC’s hands.
Her work started Dec. 1. That was the make or break time. If they hadn’t gotten on the naughty list by then, there was little hope. While there were some last-minute exceptions, the list was pretty much set by the second week of December.
She was not looking for anyone breaking any laws, but how risqué they could take their most intimate encounters. Sex on the beach, getting a little extra cozy under the tree, hosting an adult sleepover with relatives in the next room; it all had its ranking.
Now, to be clear, JC was not there to award unsafe situations. No; there were still some rules. Consent, respect and safety were some key factors to being on the list. Break any of those rules and it’s an automatic disqualification.
Logan thumbed through the pages of parchment making sure no one needed to be taken off or added to the lists. While tedious at times, she couldn’t say she disliked the work. She got a few ideas most years, from new positions to try to new locations to check out during the off-season.
JC’s naughty list was divided into three categories: bad, nasty and ultimate naughty.
The bads got the sex toy on their list. The nasties got the lingerie or sexy pajamas they requested.
Those on the true naughty list received a special visit from JC Claus. It took a lot to make that top list. Typically, the list consisted of only about 5 people. They got the special treatment with JC granting their fantasy wish. Most of the time that meant holding them by the fire with a glass of wine.
Dec. 23 rolled around and JC was making final preparations.
The wine was bottled, and the bags were packed to the brim with goodies to share Christmas Eve.
As Santa and his reindeer took to the skies, JC Claus set out on his own path as his Mercedes coupe lifted off the ground, traveling through space and time.
House by house, JC left the meticulously wrapped gifts under each tree or in stockings.
He left the naughty houses for last. As he neared the end of the nasty list, he pulled out his Leo necklace. A quick tap paused time for everyone but him and the person he was with.
His first stop was Sherrie. She and her fiancé had a three-way that even JC was jealous of. Coincidentally, his second stop was Carrie who was the third part of Sherrie’s puzzle. That didn’t know it, but they got each other on the list.
For their behavior, both received an extended near-nude cuddle session complete with candles, a glowing fireplace and red wine. JC was careful to clean off any wine that lingered on their lips.
Then, Betty Jo, who took her husband while sharing a saddle on a trail ride, got a steamy tickle session in the barn.
Ian was the only man to make the ultimate naughty list this year after he and his partner, Ben, acted out the scenarios described in Chicago’s “Cell Block Tango,” taking extra care with the spread eagle in particular.
Since Ian was the one who wrote to JC Claus, he got the gift of a warm bath and massage with wine and a dramatic reading of “Digital Get Down,” since he and Ben had met on a dating site.
After leaving Ian’s, JC was on to the last house on his list. Corinne. Corinne had been a regular on his list, but this was her first time on the elite list and she earned her spot.
Not only did she have her way with her man in the shower, on the countertop, on the tile floor, against the wall and on the beach, but the two trained free divers even took their play to the - public - hotel pool for a late-night quickie underwater during their honeymoon. Her list must’ve included 100 different ways they tried.
JC tapped his necklace and let time stand still as he led Corinne out of her bed and into the living room.
“You dreamt big, didn’t you?” JC said more than asked looking at Corinne’s wish.
“He already knows you’re my hall pass, so why not shoot for the stars,” she said with a shrug.
“Well, I’m here,” he said with his arms wide open.
Corinne jumped into his arms as they both collapsed to the ground. She rolled them under the deceptively tasteful Christmas tree.
He laid on his back as Corinne rested her arm and head on his chest as he stroked her dark brown hair that took on red and green highlights from the multicolored lights on the tree.
“Ok, now then,” JC said. With a snap of his fingers, they were both stripped down to their underwear. “You’ve been very naughty this year, Corinne. You not only made my list but were at the top of it.”
“That’s what I was hoping for,” she said. “So how much of my Christmas wish do I get?”
“Let’s see what you earn,” JC said with a wink.
Without another sound, Corrine repositioned herself directly on top of JC, crushing his lips with hers.
JC let out a soft moan and wrapped his arm tightly around Corinne.
He shifted under her and she felt a little extra dimension to him.
Instinctively, she rubbed her hands along the sides of his body, making him shiver, not once breaking their lips’ connection.
“Fuck,” he said as her fingers moved back up his body, this time using the tips of her holiday nails to trace the outline of his toned body.
“I want you inside me,” she whispered into his ear as she ruffled his hair and he began nibbling her neck.
Now it was her turn to let out a moan as he bit down just a little harder than before.
“You think you want me?” he asked her.
Without saying anything she reached down and stroked his hard member. “I think the better question is do you want me,” she teased right back.
“Yes I do,” he said as he flipped her onto her back and ripped off her lace panties.
She unclasped her bra and reached for his boxer-briefs, which matched his suit.
“Show me just how beautiful you’ll make my tree,” she challenged him.
JC playfully bit Corinne’s ear as he guided his glistening tip into her. Corinne sharply sucked in air as he eased himself in further.
“Is that what you wanted, naughty girl?” he asked.
“Almost,” she said with a twinkle in her eye.
“Almost?” he questioned.
“Pound me like a bass drum,” she said in a breathy tone.
He didn’t need to hear anything else. He withdrew almost completely and slammed into Corinne hitting spots no one had ever reached.
“Oh my, God! Yes!” she screamed as he repeatedly pounded into her.
Soon he was grunting alongside her moans and yells.
“I’m getting close!” she said.
“Let it all go,” he encouraged her. “Baby, here I come.”
With one final push, they exploded together, sinking into each other.
He rolled off her, completely spent.
“I’m glad I came to you last,” he said turning his head to face Corinne as his smile widened.
The two got to their feet, heads still spinning.
“This is one Christmas I’ll never forget,” she said looking directly into his eyes, “thanks to you, JC Claus.”
“That’s what I’m here for, sweetie,” he said, pulling her in for a hug. “I’ll be watching you. Santa sees when kids are awake and sleeping. I see when my grown girls and boys are being naughty and freaky. I hope to see you next year, Corinne.”
Then, with a tap of his necklace, time was restored and all of the special moments JC Claus brought to Sherrie, Carrie, Betty Jo, Ian and Corinne became the most colorfully satisfying dreams any of them had experienced.
Corinne woke up in bed next to her husband, Jeff, more turned on than she’d ever been. Giving him a kiss as he slept, his eyes fluttered open as he returned the gesture, quickly deepening the kiss.
“Merry Christmas to me,” he said as Corinne straddled him.
“Let’s not leave the house today,” she said.
“I’m not against that proposal,” he said.
In the back or her mind, Corinne felt her vivid dream was more than just a dream, but she had no reason to believe any of it really happened. I mean she had obviously spent the night in bed next to her husband, not under the tree with JC.
After round one was complete, the couple moved to see the gifts under the tree. As Corinne was getting the final gifts out from behind the tree, she noticed a new ornament.
In beautiful script, the engraved ornament read, “It’s beautiful under your tree. I’ll see you next year. JC Claus.”
“What is it baby?” Jeff asked.
“Nothing,” Corinne said through a smile. It wasn’t a dream. She had been with JC. He was there with her. They were together here under this tree. “I was just admiring the tree from this angle.”
Jeff laughed. “You’re so strange! But that’s why I love you.”
Sitting back in his wing-back chair, JC Claus smiled as he sipped his hot cocoa, spiked with, what else, Hot Sex.
“Hey, mami,” he said looking up. Logan stood in the doorway. “Ready to try underwater?”
“I prefer land,” she said with a smile sauntering toward her husband. “But I wouldn’t mind going back to the spread eagle. It’s been a while.”
“I’ll get the Gatorade,” JC said with a smile.
Have a freaky, deaky Christmas!