“Thank you for coming in, Ms. Pollard.  We’ll get back to you when we reach a decision…”

She shook the woman’s hand, walking out of the conference room, down the hall, and out of the district office. She carried a black leather folder that belonged to her father, with a notepad and copies of her resume. 

She walked to her car, a gold 2000 Chrysler Concorde, opening the door before slumping into the driver’s seat.  She pulled her cell phone out of her dress slacks pocket.

“Hey,” the voice said on the other end.  “How did it go?”

“The usual.  'Thanks for coming in, we’ll let you know…' Except they never do.  I’ve had 15 interviews since summer started, and not one second interview or job offer.  I’m running out of my emergency fund, which I’m lucky I had any to begin with… Paying off student loans, insurance, rent, it all adds up on a teacher’s salary. We’re in a teacher shortage, and I STILL can’t get a job. Every year or two I get pink slipped; budget cuts or they can’t guarantee a case load…”

“You’re general ed anyway, you’d have had to get a whole other credential just to keep going, and you only took that job cuz no one else was offering…”

“I know. I mean, is there something I’m doing wrong in the interview process that I’m not good enough for even desperate schools?  I’m seriously running out of money to cover gas, let alone rent and stuff…”

“Jenna, you’ve got this. Something will come up.”

“Can you sell blood? I’m getting desperate… I wish I could afford bills working retail.  Maybe get two retail jobs…”

“Jenna, come home,” the female voice said. “We’ll get pizza and drink some wine, ok?”

“Thanks, Kelly.”

“Oh, one more thing…”

“What?”

“Blast *NSYNC on your way home. They always make you feel better.”

“Bye, Kelly.  See you soon.”

Jenna hung up the phone, leaving the parking lot and driving home. She had an older car but a newer stereo, playing her Spotify playlist through Bluetooth.  The music was helping, but she couldn’t get the stress of her situation out of her head.

I’ve always had great reviews and things, the kids like me, parents like me, what am I doing wrong in the interviews?  Every year or two it’s like this.  At least before I was living with my parents.  Shit, if I don’t get a job soon I’ll have to move out. I can’t afford to live with Kelly, mooch a free room.  I always feel confident when I’m in the interviews, Dad has looked over my resumes, I just don’t get it.

The stress of everything was making her want to cry, getting the beginnings of a headache.  She grabbed her water bottle from the center console, taking a sip. She was sure the room she’d been in had AC, but she couldn’t feel it at the time, only when she stepped outside to feel the warm August heat.  The fact that she hadn’t gotten a headache earlier surprised her. She always got headaches doing IEPs in the school office, not having AC in the room they used.  That mixed with pressure to do well and the heat of summer was a perfect storm.

An uneasiness came over her.  She felt off, like things were getting fuzzy in her head. Suddenly, her vision became clouded, doing her best to pull over.  There was no time, as she turned the steering wheel, she lost the ability to step on the brake, driving without control before things went dark.

…

He was driving back from a meeting with his manager, a new project to work on. Not that it mattered. Most everything he did lately had the opposite effect they wanted. Instead of a song being a hit, it was another flop. Something he got credited for writing or producing, but it was never a hit. Not like they used to be. 

Am I too hard on myself? he wondered.  I’m over 45, I’m not the young, cool artist to work with anymore.  I get more buzz when I log onto social media and like a post from one of the guys than when an artist I work with has a new song out.  But that’s just fans, I should expect that. It’s nice that they’ll support me when they see I’m hyping a new artist or something, but it’s not what it used to be. Not that I need things to be like back in the day…

He was on autopilot on his way home when something caught his eye. A gold colored car was veering right. At first he thought it was pulling over, then the turn went sharper, not stopping, going over the curb and into bushes before hitting a cement pillar around a light pole in a parking lot. 

He was a couple car lengths behind the car, just the two of them on that side of the road.  He immediately pulled over, flashing on his emergency hazards, jumping out of the car. 

He rushed to the driver’s side door, finding it locked. The car was still in gear, the driver slumped in her seat.  He grabbed his phone. 

“911, what’s your emergency?”

“I have a woman slumped at the wheel of her car, it ran into a light in the parking lot.  I can’t open the door to see if she’s ok…”

“May I have your location?”

“Wilshire and Barry, in front of the 7 Eleven and Baskin Robbins.”

“Are you safe, sir?”

“Yes, I was behind her and saw it happen. I thought she might be pulling over, then the turn went sharper before she went up the curb and sidewalk.”

“Ok. The police will need you to stay as you were a witness.  Emergency response is on their way.”

He could hear sirens getting closer, seeing a fire truck round the corner into view.  It pulled up on the wrong side of the road, firemen rushing out to respond to the woman.  The woman was breathing, he heard them say, but nonresponsive.  The car was already totaled, and they needed to cut her out to get her out in case she wouldn’t wake up.

Police and an ambulance came, police getting a statement on what he saw.  They cleared him to go, but he needed to make sure she was ok.  They were able to get her out of the car, the woman barely conscious.  He heard the police call for a tow truck to take her car, police beginning to take any personal items out of her car.

“I can take those,” he offered.

“Are you family or anything?”

“No,” he sighed.  

“We’ll take it with us to the hospital, but thank you.”

He stayed back, letting them get her into the gurney and into the ambulance. He walked to his car, giving the ambulance some space.  He got in, following behind at a distance.  He saw the ambulance unload her into the ER, himself deciding to grab an iced coffee and come back later. 

For all I know, I’m the only person that they can link her to. What if they can’t find someone to contact? SOMEONE needs to know she’s ok…

He returned to the hospital a short while later, hoping he could even see her.  He approached the desk at the ER.

“Hi, ummm, there was a woman brought in a while ago, she was unconscious and crashed her car… I want to make sure she’s ok.”

The nurse on the other side of the desk blushed, knowing full well who he was.  “That’s very sweet of you. How do you know her?”

“I don’t, actually. I saw the accident she was involved in. I wanna make sure someone knows if she’s ok or not.”

“She’s still under observation and undergoing some tests.  You’re free to wait in here, or I can find you somewhere more private…”

“Recognize me, do you?”

“Yeah.  Technically I shouldn’t be allowing you to see her, but given you’re being such a Good Samaritan, I couldn’t let that go unnoticed.”

“Is she conscious?”

“I don’t know. I’ll have the doctor talk to you once they know more. I’ll say you’re her boyfriend, that’ll be enough to let you see her.”

“Don’t say that too loudly, the last thing I need is someone overhearing misinformation.”

“If anyone asks, tell them that. I’m ok with you checking on her, but others might not.  You’ll need to be someone she’s close to in order to see her.”

He nodded, understanding the rules she was breaking for him.  He didn’t fully understand it himself, feeling compelled to make sure she was ok, a complete stranger.  But here he was, in an emergency room waiting room ready to pretend to be her boyfriend so he could see her.

His phone rang.  “Babe, where are you?  I thought you’d be home by now. I’m glad you picked up, I was starting to worry…”

 

“I’m at the hospital…”

“What?! Are you ok?”

“I’m fine. I saw a woman drive off the road into a light pole.  I called 911, I’m wanting to make sure she’s ok.”

“You don’t think…”

“I don’t know. I mean, maybe.  It crossed my mind. I guess that’s why I need to make sure she’s ok.  That I might have seen her last moments before…”

“Yeah.  You’re a good man. I love you.”

“Love you too, babe.  I’ll be home once they let me see her, make sure she’s ok.”

He hung up the phone, sipping his iced coffee as he waited. He picked up a magazine on the table next to him, flipping blankly through the pages in an attempt to kill time. He grabbed his phone, scrolling through emails and social media.

He heard footsteps approach, seeing a doctor in a white coat.  “You’re here for Jenna Pollard?” the doctor asked. 

At least I know her name, he thought before nodding to the doctor. 

“Come with me.”

The doctor led him down the hall to the ER rooms.  “She had a seizure while at the wheel. From what she told me, I’d guess it was stress related. Try and help keep her stress down for a while. She’s still a little out of it, which is normal for this type of seizure. Right now she’s mostly sleepy, again, fully normal.  You’re aware she has epilepsy?”

“No,” he said,” “I had no idea.”  He was being honest.  “So this wasn’t some type of suicide attempt?”

“Do you have reason to believe she would do that?”

“No, I just had never seen anything like this, maybe thought she was trying to end things.”

“I won’t deny that the stress that brought this on might have been strong enough to tie to that possibility, but she never gave any indication of that being the case to us. Maybe she’d tell you.  I just wanted to give you as much as we know so far before you went in to see her.”

The doctor walked him to a curtain, one he assumed had the woman on the other side. He was alone, his hand on the curtain, somehow nervous about who was on the other side.

He opened the curtain slowly, her red hair the first thing he saw. Her car window had made it look more brown, but the lighting in the hospital showed just how red her hair was. Her eyes were closed, but her frame was petite. She was breathtaking, he noticed her features despite the exhaustion her body was in.  A small nose, soft chin, full lips.  Despite her hair color, she didn’t have many freckles, but did have a fairer skin tone. There were the beginnings of bruises from where she hit the steering wheel, but she was still a beautiful woman. She moved, her eyes slowly opening. Without directly looking at her, her eyes were the brightest blue he had ever seen in real life. He was sure the blue eyes he’d seen in photographs were touched up to look that way, but hers were all natural.

He was nervous as she turned to face him.  Her eyes fixed in him, her face curious before widening, her mouth gaping open. 

Yup, this is happening… he thought. 

…

She felt groggy, everything was a blur. She knew she was in a hospital, but not sure how she ended up there.  She saw a body in front of her that wasn’t wearing a white lab coat, turning to get a better look. 

He was in dark wash jeans and a black t-shirt, so effortlessly put together.  She saw his face, trying to figure out why she knew him. Then it clicked. His face has been plastered all over her walls as a late teen.  Since the pandemic, she’d bought more merchandise to please her inner teen.  The blue eyes were unmistakable.

“You’re…” she gasped. He nodded silently. “But why are you here?  Why am I here?”

“You had an accident.  Totaled your car…”

“I didn’t hit you, did I?”

“No.  I was a couple car lengths behind you. I saw you lose control and pulled over to make sure you were ok.  I made the 911 call.”

“You saved my life…” she sighed. 

“I doubt I did THAT much…”

“Was I conscious when you pulled over?”

“No, you were slumped over the steering wheel. I tried opening your door, but it was locked. I banged on the window and you did nothing. That’s when I made the call.”

“Thank you for the call, but why are you here?  How did they let you see me, a complete stranger?”

“The nurse told them I’m your boyfriend.  I went along with it. I needed to know you were ok, that I hadn’t just seen the last moments of your life.”

“Well, 16 year old me would never believe this, coming full circle…”

“Full circle?”

“It’s how I became a fan. Well, a diehard fan. I was ready to kill myself, knife in my hand.  I asked God for one reason not to go through with it. I got this feeling to turn on my stereo, and God Must Have Spent was playing. You’ve saved my life twice, only this time you know about it.”

“They said you’re epileptic…”

“I have epilepsy, it doesn’t have me. Well, not most days.”

“They said to reduce your stress, that brought this on…”

“I’m super great about taking my meds, so it makes sense that with everything I’m going through…”

He sat down in the chair next to her bed, looking intently at her.  “Tell me about it.”

“You don’t need to hear about my problems…”

“Maybe not, but I want to.”

Jenna sighed. “I’m a teacher. At least I was. I got laid off at the end of the school year. I’ve slowly gone through my savings, unemployment payments only cover so much… I was on my way home from another failed job interview when it all happened. I can’t afford to stay living with my roommate, I’ll have to move back in with my parents.  I’m an over 35 year old college graduate and can’t keep a job; not one using my degree and will pay the bills.  Sorry, this must sound so foreign to you…”

“I still understand the struggle, the way you’re feeling.  I was feeling the same way, in a way.  Any project I’m on lately goes nowhere. The fans find out, but nothing on a bigger scale. Not that I NEED it to, but I’m starting to feel like I’m just another has been.”

“Not to the fans, not the ones that really care.  But I guess that’s like me. The kids and parents love me, but the school can’t keep me on because of budget cuts and stuff… It doesn’t matter how much people like you if you aren’t working.”

“Something like that.  So you have no job, now you have no car…”

“I can’t drive for the next 3 months, as long as I don’t have another seizure.  I get to take the bus to interviews, assuming I can even GET interviews…”

“Could you borrow your roommate’s car?”

“She’s a nurse, long hours, wouldn’t work… Shit, what am I gonna do?”  She felt overwhelmed, starting to cry.  “Great, now I’m crying in front of you, just when I thought there wasn’t a rock bottom…”

He saw her phone sitting on the table, grabbing it.  He turned it to face her to unlock it. “What are you doing?” she sniffled.

His fingers started flying. “I’m in your phone now. Call me when you need a ride to an interview or anything.”

“That’s too much, I can’t ask you to do that.”

“I insist. My other option is to buy you a car…”

“Ok, I must still be dreaming.  Why do you care so much?”

“I don’t know, but it’s clear the universe had us cross paths for a reason,” he said, taking her hand in his.

She looked down at her hand, her body starting to shake.

“Another seizure?” he asked, worried. 

“No, just nerves and freaking out that a famous pop star is touching my hand…”

“Well, that’s a start.  I’m just a regular person underneath it all.”

His phone began to buzz.  “I’m sure you need to get that, I’m sure you have somewhere to be.  I should call Kelly, my roommate, I’m surprised she hasn’t freaked out that I’m not home yet…”

He looked at her. “Seriously, call me if you need ANYTHING.  They said you need to keep your stress down. I wanna help do my part. I’ve saved your life twice now, I can’t just let you down.”

She watched him walk past the curtain pulling it mostly closed. He looked at her one last time, a soft smile on his face.

“Thanks, JC.  I’ll call if I need anything,” she said, pressing his contact in her phone. “Now you have my number, should I need to call you…”

“I hope you do.”

“What kind of boyfriend would you be if you didn’t?” she smiled.  He laughed quietly at her reply before closing the curtain.

She hadn’t even looked at the phone contact until just then.  She wasn’t sure whether to smile or cry again. He’d saved himself in her phone as “Josh- Guardian Angel”.

 

A few minutes later, Jenna heard the curtain open. She locked eyes with Kelly, who was wide eyed and jittery.

“You’d think YOU just had a seizure,” Jenna laughed. 

“I… on the way to see you… I saw, almost ran into…”

Yup, I know who she saw…

“Your dream boat was here, Jenna!”

“You’re going to need to clarify…”

“JC from *NSYNC was here!”

“Ok, hang on.  I was a Justin girl, still am…”

“You love all the guys, you can’t deny you thought he was hot even back then.”

“I mean, I have eyes,” Jenna laughed. “He was too old for me then, he was 23 when I was 16…”

“He’s still older than you, but that doesn’t make a difference.  Did you get to see him?  I wonder why he was here… You don’t think something happened to Jen, or God forbid, Justin??”

“I’m sure it was nothing.  I don't think this hospital is in any of their insurance networks.  Shit, I don’t even have medical coverage right now, how am I gonna pay for this?”

“Being unemployed, you might qualify for Medi-Cal.  Just let them know you need to apply.”

“I hope I’m approved quickly, I’m running out of my meds.”

“The generic isn’t that expensive, I can help cover that.”

“Kelly, I’m gonna have to move out. Even with Unemployment, I won’t have enough for rent…”

“We’ll figure things out,” Kelly said.

Jenna knew she’d have to call JC at some point, the question was why and for what.

“So what happened? We talked on the phone about you coming home, and then an hour later I get a call saying you’re here…”

“I was so stressed about everything that not even listening to *NSYNC was helping me feel better. Next thing I know, I’m here.  Someone saw my accident, called 911 and checked on me, made sure I was ok. They left a few minutes before you got here.”

“Please tell me it was a handsome guy, you need to get laid…”

“Pretty sure he has a girlfriend,” Jenna replied. 

“You talked to him?  Was he cute??”

“Yes, very hot.  The kind that would definitely already be with someone else.  Definitely not someone like me.”

“You’re beautiful, Jenna.  You need to own it.”

“I’m a redhead, there’s still plenty of people that have a fear of us, for some reason. Even Apple hasn’t added emojis for people with red hair yet… I should know, I signed the petition to have them add one.”

“I signed that too, you went on about it for a couple days…”

“Either way, I’m not his type.  Unemployed without a car isn’t a good look, either.”

“You talked to him, right? Thanked him?”

“Yeah. He gave me his number if I needed anything…”

“Like a date?” Kelly smiled. 

“Like a ride to an interview…. His girlfriend called before he left. I could tell by the ringtone.  Nothing is ever going to happen.”

“Maybe that’s your problem, in the interviews.  You have great answers but are so nervous you don’t come across as confident.  You’ve been single for way too long, maybe a date or two would get your confidence going…”

“Yeah, cuz that’s the answer to all my problems.  Find a man so I won’t need to work and shit.  You’re sounding like my grandmother, rest her soul.”

“Not meaning it like that, though if he’s rich, why not?  Be his trophy wife.”

“You know I’d still teach, at least sub.  I do it because I love it, not because of the money.  Though right now, having money would be nice…”

Her phone vibrated on the stand.  SHe looked at it, a soft smile spreading across her face.

Hopefully you’re in good hands.  Seriously, if you need ANYTHING, let me know.  Are they keeping you overnight?

“Ooh, what’s got you suddenly smiling?”

“Just him, the guy.  Checking up on me.”

“I’d say his girlfriend is gonna be an ex soon enough…”

“Doubtful, she’s beautiful, like… gorgeous…”

“You saw a picture?”

“Yeah,” she lied.  There was no way Kelly would react normally to JC Chasez being her guardian angel.  Maybe she’d find out eventually, but right now, she’d be freaking out, asking him for all kinds of things just because he offered.

She pressed the call button, waiting for a nurse to come by.  “Do you need something?”

“Can you see if they’re keeping me overnight or not?  I’d like to go home if I can…”

“Sure, let me have the doctor talk to you.”  The nurse went off, Jenna curious on how long it would take.  She was sure it had already been a couple hours since the accident, her interview had been before lunch time.  She looked at her phone, seeing it was almost 6.

“Kelly, you really waited this long to come see me? You weren’t freaking out or anything?”

“I mean, I was a little but I thought maybe you needed a little space before coming home and decompressing with me.  Then once I heard from the hospital I headed over.”

Her ER doctor came to her bed. “You were looking for me?”

“Am I staying for observation, or will I be getting discharged?”

“You’re doing better now, have a ride home, though I admittedly thought your boyfriend would be doing that particular task…”

“Boyfriend?” Kelly wondered, Jenna giving her a look.

“I see no reason to keep you overnight. We’ll start on discharge paperwork and get you on your way, Ms. Pollard…”

Kelly waited until the doctor walked around a corner, looking back at Jenna. “Care to explain?”

“The nurse up in the waiting room of the ER said he was my boyfriend so they’d let him in to see me. It’s not like it’s the 90s anymore and you can just waltz right into a hospital room, especially in an ER post COVID… This isn’t While You Were Sleeping. I know I’m no Sandra Bullock…”

“But is he your Bill Pullman?”

“It’s not gonna happen, Kelly…”

“He pretended to be your boyfriend to check on you.  This SCREAMS romance…”

“It really doesn’t.  He was just a nice guy that wanted to make sure I was ok.  Just a random Good Samaritan…”

She looked at her phone.  I’m being discharged as we speak.  It might be a bit, but I won’t be at the hospital tonight.  That’s a relief.

You want dinner?  I can order something for you…

Wouldn’t I need to give you my address?

Smart one, you are.  It would help so they aren’t just driving around, yeah…  What do you like?

We were supposed to do pizza and wine when I got back, before everything.  I won’t be having wine for a while, just in case, but pizza sounds good still…  There’s the Koreantown Pizza place near us.

Ok, we are going there sometime, that sounds AMAZING!

Jenna smiled as she saw his latest text.  The idea of having pizza with JC Chasez was a little hard to believe, but it made her smile.

“Good Samaritan?” Kelly asked.

“Yeah.  He wants to get us dinner.”

“Oooh, Pepperoni Pizza Company?  The usual?”

Jenna nodded.  Pepperoni Pizza Company, a No Pepperoni and a Sausage and Fennel.  Address is 3540 WIlshire Blvd, Apartment 3C.

No pepperoni pizza?  You mean, cheese?

I’m just telling you what’s on their menu, but yes.

You got it.

Pun intended? She smiled, quite sure he had done that unintentionally.

What?  Oh.  Haha.  No, not intended.  Just let me know when you’re leaving and I’ll place the order.

It’ll be a while, as much as they need the room, they can still take a while with paperwork.

On cue, a nurse came over with her discharge papers, going over her next steps of care.  All things that she knew, things she had been doing, reminding her that she’s not allowed to drive for at least 3 months.

So, they just gave me my papers, but it’ll still take a bit to get home.Maybe wait another 20-30 minutes to get home, settle in a bit.  You don’t have to do this, JC…

It’s the least I can do, you’ve had a terrible day.

I must say, being saved by JC Chasez made it a hell of a lot better.  I owe you in ways I know I can never repay.  

You owe me nothing beyond taking care of yourself.  Get home and enjoy the pizza later.

Jenna put her phone down, Kelly having a look on her face.  “Awfully long text chat for someone you don’t stand a chance with.”

“Just giving him the update that I am discharged and to give us time to get home before he orders the pizza.  Nothing more than that.”

“You forget I know your PIN to unlock your phone, I can look at your texts while you’re asleep tonight.”

“And now you just talked your way into me changing my PIN so that won’t happen.”

“Ok, I’ve made that joke before and you’ve just laughed it off.  You really don’t want me to see what you’re texting this guy.  Something is up and you’re keeping it from me.  Oh god, you weren’t saved by one of my exes, were you?”

Jenna laughed.  “Definitely not one of your exes.  If so, you’ve been holding out on me…”

“Seriously, though, you don’t want me to see who it is, what you’re saying to each other?”

“Because you’ll make it this big thing, and get these ideas in your head…”

“This guy could have left you on the side of the road, Jenna…”

“I ended up in a 7Eleven parking lot, someone eventually would have called 911…”

“Or left you thinking you were a drunk or homeless person…”

“That crashed my car into a light pole?”

“Stranger things have happened, this IS LA, for crying out loud.  I’m still curious why JC was here, but I know you didn’t see him.”

“Why’s that?”

“Because you would have ripped out the IVs, jumped out of bed, and ran down the hallway just for a glimpse of that man.”

“I told you, I’m a Justin girl,” Jenna laughed.

“But he’s the unicorn.  If JC is somewhere, you are lucky to be in his presence.”

“Even with IVs and bruises on me?”

“He’d still look at you and tell you how beautiful you look.”

“See, that shit right there is why I’m not telling you about who I’m texting.  Romanticizing it when the guy saw the accident, did what he could, and made sure I was ok after.  That’s it, the end.”

 

She wished JC had done even half of what Kelly had suggested.  To hear him call her beautiful would have been too much.  It was enough he rescued her, saving her life, then holding her hand, listening to her.  But she knew it was out of concern, not anything romantic.  He had Jen, and she was no competition for a woman like that.  Sexy, important, driven, everything she felt she wasn’t.

They were a couple episodes into a Friends binge when Jenna grabbed her phone, taking a picture of the pizza on the coffee table, Jenna’s glass of sweet tea, and the TV on in the background, sending it to JC.

Thanks for the pizza.  Perfect after a day like today.

Glad I could help.  What’s on in the background?

Friends.

Never seen it.

Jenna almost choked.  What?!  It’s been off the air for years, in syndication on major networks even before it went off the air.  Maybe that’s what you can do, we can watch Friends together so you aren’t an uncultured swine…

I’m not big into sitcoms.  I’m more of a drama, thriller, horror type guy.  I mean, I like a good comedy, but TV shows aren’t my thing, they're over too quickly.

Each episode has it’s own problem, sure, but there’s the overarching storylines woven through the season, through the series.  The pull of the ‘will they/won’t they’...

I’ll look into it.  But the pizza’s good? I had to look up where the pizza place is, where your apartment is.  You’re kinda far out there…  Almost the other end of Wilshire from where I found you.

Just cuz you live up in the hills…  And it’s LA, everywhere takes at least 30 minutes to get to, if not longer…  Thank you for the pizza, but thank you much more for earlier today.  Words can’t express what you did.

I’d say anyone could have done it, but let’s be real… people suck.

I like to be the optimist, give people a chance.  Some people are just garbage, but usually put their best face forward to make a good impression.  I should let you go, I’m sure Jen would like your attention.  You guys are great together.

She says she hopes you feel better, I told her everything when I got home.  I still say it wasn’t that big a thing, just doing the right thing.

Honestly, I could’ve died if you’d just left me.  I know it’s LA, someone would’ve gotten curious, maybe the business owners would have called… But you called 911, then stuck around the hospital to make sure I was ok, pretending to be my boyfriend just to check up on me.

Yeah, didn’t tell Jen that part.  

This is group chat worthy.  You saved someone’s life, and she happened to be a fan.  I mean, I haven’t even told my roommate, so it’s not like it’ll make the papers. Not like when you saved that baby on the beach from that rogue umbrella. See, more being in the right place at the right time.  Admit it, you stopped doing *NSYNC to focus on your superhero career…

If only. 

Well, you’re my superhero, take that for what it’s worth.

Have a good night, Jenna. 

Have a good night, JC.  Someday I’ll learn your alter ego. 

JC is my alter ego. I’m really just Josh, a normal guy that found out he’s really good at a lot of things.

Maybe so. Either way, I owe you my life.  Good night.

JC closed his chat with Jenna, opening another open chat. 

So, I saved a woman’s life today…

Lance: Wait, what?

I was driving down Wilshire and this car ahead of me runs off the road. I pull over, call 911, follow the ambulance to the hospital to make sure she’s ok.

Chris: I’d ask if she’s hot, but you have Jen, that’s not your motivation.

She was unconscious, I knew I had to do something…

Justin: You did the right thing.

I told the doctors I was her boyfriend so I could see her

Joey: Ok, shit just went sideways…

Chris: couldn’t have said you were her brother?

She has red hair, so no…

Joey: You’ve never had a redhead. They’re fun…

Lance: They’re not toys you play with, asshole…

Joey: I know that… but still fun.

Fuck, I knew this would happen…

Another text thread updated. Proud of you, C.  Don’t let Joey fuck this up. You helped someone today, made a difference. 

T, she’s a fan.

Of course she is. 

Told me things came full circle. She tried killing herself when she was 16, back in the day, but one of our songs stopped her.  She told me at least this time I actively saved her life. 

Damn… 

I gave her my number. We’ve been texting. 

Careful, C…

I am.  She’s not like that, I can tell. I offered to drive her to things, since she can’t drive for a while and her roommate works long hours, she barely let me buy her pizza tonight.

Like a date?

Like delivery to her apartment…

Is she some spoiled LA girl?

She’s an unemployed teacher running on fumes. All the stress she’s under triggered a seizure. 

Oh shit…

Yeah. I guess that’s why I wanna help her. I offered to buy her a car, T…

For real?!

I felt like she needed something…

You know what Joey would suggest in the group chat…

Yeah, some sleazy sex reference. Have I told you lately I love how grown up our friendship is? I’ve known you since you were 12 but you can act like an adult around me…

Some of us are more mature than Fatone…

More like ALL of us…

Chris has his days…

His phone buzzed, another text coming through.

Are you ok after what you saw today?

JC sighed. I’m fine, Lance. I was nervous and worried for a while, afraid she died.  But once I saw her, I knew she was ok…

Just making sure you don’t need to bring this up to your therapist.

I never should have told you guys I’m in therapy…

Hey, everyone needs it at some point. 

Can I have them bill Chris and Joey instead of me? Half the shit they pulled is why I need therapy…

I can think of others that should pay it more.

Yeah, but that’ll never happen. I’m in a good place. Things are great with Jen, I’m working outside the spotlight…

And saved a woman’s life. Ride that high as long as it lasts, buddy.  You did the right thing. 

JC put his phone away, his mind still thinking of Jenna. He wished he could help her more. He knew people, but that was in the entertainment industry, he had no connections in education to get her something. He wondered if she had other skills she could turn into a job, curious if Jen’s work had any openings.  Lance already had a nanny, so that wasn’t really an option.  

He picked up his phone again. Hey, any chance you can look into if Si’s school is hiring?

You looking to change careers, buddy?

For Jenna, the woman from today. She’s a teacher, between jobs right now. 

I’ll look into it, sure.  Doing an awful lot for a random stranger…

She could’ve died, T.  Her doctor says she needs to keep her stress down so she doesn’t have another one.

You saw her doctor?

He talked to me before I saw her in the ER. Pretended to be her boyfriend, remember?

Doesn’t mean you have to take that on though, C.

Someone has to, to make sure she’s ok.

Just be careful.

I will. It’s nothing like that. Things are good right now. 

Good, not great?

You know what I mean.

Night, C. 

Night, T.

JC looked at Jen, curled up beside him on the couch. “You know of any temp agencies or anything? Or is there an opening somewhere at your work? I’m wracking my brain trying to figure out something for Jenna…”

“She’ll be fine, Josh. I love how caring you are, though.  My man saved someone’s life today. My personal superhero. Makes me feel like Lois Lane.”

“Does that make me Superman? Just don’t tell Joey…” JC laughed. 

 

Jen got up from the couch, grabbing JC’s hand.  “Superman may be faster than a speeding bullet, but what I have in mind will take hours…”

Jenna woke up the next morning, grabbing her phone. She opened her texts, smiling at the last text thread. She hadn’t dreamed it, JC Chasez was texting her. Had texted, not like he will anymore, she thought to herself.  He saved your life, bought you pizza, but that’s it.  She scrolled through the text thread when her phone buzzed. 

Good morning 

Her eyes widened. This couldn’t be happening…

Good morning

You eat already?

No, just woke up.

Wanna grab a bite? Or wait until lunch?

She blinked. There was no way this was happening.

Ummm, sure.  Whatever is fine.

Can you be ready in an hour?

As in you’re at my door in an hour, or you’re leaving your place in an hour?

Which would be better?

The latter. Gives me time to get ready. 

Am I coming up to your door?

Meet me in the lobby?

Sounds good. See you soon.

Jenna scrolled back through the messages, needing to make sure it actually happened. Go shower, idiot! JC is picking you up to go eat!!

She wasn’t going to question the why of it all, knowing where that would lead. She definitely felt undeserving of such attention, but tried to remain realistic. He has a girlfriend, this is nothing romantic. 

She finished showering, wrapping a towel around her and looking in her closet. She settled on a black jumpsuit with a scoop neck and the pants ending just below the knee. She wanted to look nice without seeming like she was trying too hard to impress him. She pulled her hair back into a braid down the center of her back, knowing it would be warm again by afternoon. She spritzed a little lilac lavender body spray before slipping into a pair of black sandals and heading down to the lobby. 

She waited with baited breath, not wanting to keep him waiting and draw attention to the fact that he was even there.  Her phone buzzed in the pocket of her jumpsuit. 

Hey, I’m just getting up. Where are you?

Out for the day, I’ll be back later.

Home for dinner?

Yes, Mom…

Hey, just checking. Anything fun?

Grabbing something to eat with a friend.

Have fun. See you when I get home. 

Jenna was glad there were magazines and things in the lobby, sitting down in a chair as she waited for him.  She heard the door open several times, looking back at her magazine as each person wasn’t JC.  She pulled out her phone, scrolling through her social media.  She heard someone clearing their throat, looking up to have her eyes lock with his.

“You ready?” he asked with a soft smile.

“Yeah.  I didn't even hear you come in.  I literally checked every time the door opened so you wouldn’t be waiting for me.”

“I’m parked outside, there was a metered spot open.  Fed the meter, so someone will get a nice surprise when we leave.”

“I do love when that happens,” she smiled as she stood.

Her eyes widened as he pulled her into a hug.  “You feeling ok?  You look great, you’d never guess anything happened yesterday…”

“A good foundation covers a multitude of flaws,” she sighed.

He rolled his eyes.  “I doubt they’re flaws.”

“Hid my bruises on my face, so I’m not complaining.  Just glad I don’t have any other interviews this week so far, give everything time to heal.”

They walked to his Jeep, JC opening her door for her, Jenna smiling to herself.  She smiled wider as she listened to his eclectic taste in music as they drove through the city.  Some of it she expected, others she didn’t.  It wasn’t on very loud, just enough that it broke the silence, but could still have conversation over it.  The GPS on his phone led them through turns, Jenna curious where they were going.  

Eventually they got onto Santa Monica Blvd, JC turning off the GPS.  Jenna looked around, her eyes widening as JC turned a corner before parking in a small rear parking lot.  She tried to keep herself calm as she realized she was walking with JC into Rocco’s.  He opened a back door, Jenna walking into an empty restaurant, save for the sounds of the cooks prepping food for the day and joking as music played.

“I’m not complaining, but why are we here?  It’s a random weekday, they aren’t even open…”

“I wasn’t sure if you’d been here, but definitely not with someone like me.  That sounded weird, sorry.  I figured if you hadn’t been here, having your first time being here be with a friend of the owner…”

“I’ve always wanted to come, but never made it over.  I kicked myself the night of the Big Brother party where 3 of you were here, I could've gotten pictures with you, Chris, and Lance… School night though, so I couldn’t make it, or so I thought.  Turns out you guys were pretty much done with time for me to get a decent night’s sleep, but oh well.  I’m here now, and not awkwardly walking up to you asking for a picture.  You’re bringing me here, though I still don’t understand why.”

They sat in a u-shaped small leather booth, one of the staff bringing them water.  “Your usual, JC?” the guy winked, JC nodding with a smile.

“What do you want?” JC asked Jenna.

“Is it too early to get the pesto fettuccine?”

“I mean, It’s 10AM, but if that’s what you want…”

The young man looked at Jenna.  “You’re here with JC, we’ll make you whatever the fuck you want, darling.”

“Mushroom, spinach, and bell pepper omelet?” Jenna asked.

“Cheese?”

“Monterey Jack if you have it.”

“Any drink for you?  Remember, it’s 5:00 somewhere…” the young man winked.

“Ummm, pineapple juice and a splash of rum.  Really shouldn’t be drinking too much.  Not that I drink a LOT to begin with…  Oh god, now I’m rambling…”

“It’s cute, honey.”  he looked at JC.  “No Jen this morning?”

“She’s got work,” he shrugged.

The young man walked away, leaving the two of them alone as the staff continued to prep for the day.  

“You’ll have to show me ‘your’ table when you would come for the Sunday drag brunches.  I loved seeing you on the Rocco’s lives from time to time.”

“Yeah, this is more the bar area, away from any cameras, not that I expect any at 10AM in an empty restaurant…”

Jenna was quiet for a moment. “JC, why are you doing all this?  You saved MY life, not the other way around.  You don’t owe me spending time together, you don’t owe me anything…”

“I think we’re all wondering that,” a familiar voice asked.  Her eyes widened as she saw Lance walking toward her, trying not to freak out.  He sat next to her in the booth, a bloody mary in hand, one guy on each side of her now.  “I suggested he bring you here after he told us what happened yesterday, had to meet you.”

“Wait, I made the group chat?” she asked in surprise.

“Sure did,” Lance chuckled.  

“Justin and Lance were the more helpful two,” JC said, rolling his eyes.

“Had to make sure you weren’t a crazy fan,” Lance smiled.

“Pretty sure I am, but I think we all are, on some level.  Maybe not NOW, but I’m sure back in the day you had moments of ‘oh my god…’ when you met someone.”

“We still get that way.  C, you gonna answer her question, on why you’re spending time with her?  I’d like to know the answer.”  He sipped on his bloody mary as he waited for JC.

“I figured you needed someone, after what happened…”

“So you pity me.  Great…” Her face deflated, knowing her suspicions were correct.

“I wouldn’t say pity…  Out of… concern more than anything I guess.  Make sure you’re ok.”

“You did that yesterday at the hospital, and bought me pizza.  Honestly, just making the 911 call was enough.  You could have walked away, or checked with the doctor and left knowing I was ok, without seeing me.  Why give me your number, bring me to meet another member of *NSYNC?”

“I can call Justin if you want,” JC laughed.  Her face turned bright red.

“Don’t tell me we have a Justin girl…  JC, I hope you aren’t disappointed,” Lance joked.  “I was going to ask who your favorite is, at some point.  Thanks to C here for not making me have to put you in the spotlight like that…”

She looked at Lance, trying really hard not to look at JC.  “I describe myself as a Justin girl with heavy JC tendencies…”

Lance looked as JC turned red, a smile spreading across his face.  “Well, tell me about yourself.. Jenna, right?”

“Oh my god, you told them my name?” she gasped, looking at JC.

“Again, just Lance and Justin.”

“It’s funny. I live in LA but figured you two would be the last ones I would meet.”

“Now we’re the first?” Lance laughed. 

“No,” Jenna said. “I had VIP tickets for Man of The Woods, Justin grabbed my hand. Then I was in Vegas when Joey did the After Party thing last year, and I am flying out in October to see Chris host Pop2000 in Nor Cal. Figured I could tour San Francisco, see part of where you filmed This I Promise You…”

“So we’re still kinda last, except Chris.”

“This is definitely not how I thought this would happen, especially JC.  I figured at some point I’d make it down here for a Sunday brunch and JC would be here, or maybe an event you’re hosting here or at Heart.”

“I wanted to get to know you, Jenna, to answer your earlier question. If I can, help you find a job. I gotta ask, you were so far from where you live when this all happened, what were you doing that far down Wilshire? Like, almost to the west end of it…”

“Job interview.  You saw me in a hospital gown, but I had worn a pantsuit ensemble yesterday.  I feel like I’ve applied literally everywhere, so if I have to make that commute every day to get paid, then so be it.  It’s LA, there’s always traffic.”

“Was it a job you actually wanted?” JC inquired. 

“I’ll take any teaching job I can get, I need the money. I took a special education job one year.  It was hard, but they were desperate enough to take me.”

“You shouldn’t have to settle on a job you aren’t passionate about,” JC sighed, looking at Jenna. 

“A lot of people do it,” she replied. “I’m glad I can use my degree. I have a friend who majored in Youth Ministry because she’d had fun in high school, volunteering in college, then once she had to run a program, found out how hard it was and quit. Now she’s working at Starbucks.  So at least I enjoy what I do and use my degree.  Sometimes you gotta take jobs you don’t like to pay the bills.”

Lance looked silently at JC, JC avoiding his eye  contact.

“I thought maybe meeting you would be a story I tell on an *NSYNC fan podcast I listen to, but this, I can’t take advantage of that.”

“There’s seriously podcasts about us?” JC asked. 

“I knew there had been one, I was on it, sang their little intro…”

“It’s new, started in January. It’s called ‘Ready to Fall’.”

“Like the song from On the Line?  Don’t ask me how I remembered that…” Lance laughed. 

“Yeah. They were ready to fall in love with you guys back then, and ready to fall again with whatever is next.  Next month is their month long celebration of JC, for his birthday.”

“Yeah, definitely not listening…” JC sighed. “It’s flattering, but…”

“They had girls on that met you guys at the Big Brother thing, or met Justin at the golf thing he did in Tahoe.  This is a different kind of story with you guys.  One I’ll keep to myself, or tell very few people.  It’s too special to brag about like that.  I mean, it shows what a great guy you are, JC, but I want that to be a story I tell my grandchildren, not the whole world. You’d hate the attention, for one thing…”

“It’s like you know him,” Lance laughed. “I’m surprised no one at the hospital said anything and it’s not all over the news. ‘JC Chasez saves woman after seizure behind the wheel’, ‘woman has seizure while driving, JC Chasez makes live saving 911 call’…”

“Please stop saying my full name…” JC groaned, putting his hand over his face.

“JC Chasez is suspect in murder of Lance Bass…” Lance laughed, Jenna joining in. Eventually even JC cracked a smile. 

Their food came, Jenna impressed by their ability to make whatever she wanted. She knew it was because of the men she was sitting between, and that things like this wouldn’t last long.

“I’ll be right back,” JC said quietly, getting up from the table, walking down a hallway.

“So, what’s the verdict?” Jenna teased. “Am I a crazy fan?”

“No, you’re amazing. Maybe too amazing…”

“How so?”

“If I didn’t know any better, I’d say that he…”

“Don’t say it, Lance.  Don’t tell me he has feelings for me. My roommate has it in her head that he’s gonna dump his girlfriend for me as it is, not even knowing it’s JC.  I’m not his type, I’m not Jen.”

“You just have the easiness about you, seeing you together.  Like you aren’t bothered by this.”

“Whatever this is, isn’t going to last long. It’s gone on longer than it should. He called 911 and saved my life, it’s not like I did anything to deserve this. I still say it feels like pity.  It hasn’t even been a full 24 hours yet. At some point, he’ll be bored with this, and it’ll be a nice story I tell when I’m old.”

JC returned to the table, Jenna getting up to use the restroom. Lance looked at his friend. 

“You like her,” Lance smiled. 

“Lance, no.”

“You LIKE her…”

“Lance, stop!  Am I glad I did the right thing and didn’t leave her for someone else to find? Yes.  Am I enjoying being a hero? A little. But I have Jen, who made it very clear last night how much of a hero she thinks I am over this.”

“Hang on. You save Jenna’s life, and Jen banged you because of it?”

“Best sex I’ve had in a while, not that I’m complaining, but damn…”

“I’m looking for anyone or anything to save and see if Michael feels the same way,” Lance chuckled. “So you don’t think she’s attractive?”

“I have eyes, Lance, but I also have a girlfriend I love, and I respect our relationship enough to not jeopardize it.”

“Does Jen even know you’re here?  With her?”

“No,” JC sighed. 

“Be careful, C.  Someone’s gonna get hurt here, and none of you deserve that…”

Jenna returned to the table, JC moving over to let her sit.  They talked for a while about her; where she grew up, things she liked to do.  JC could tell she was getting uncomfortable talking about herself at length, but at the same time felt glad to know they were interested.

“Well, you guys should probably go before they open for lunch.  It was nice to meet you Jenna, don’t be a stranger.  Seriously, come in and I’ll make sure you’re taken care of.”  He grabbed his phone, taking a picture of Jenna.  “I’ll make sure this is posted in the back, maybe call ahead so they know you’re coming.  Nothing extreme, but you get a good server, good table, whatever.”

“You’re sounding like this one.  I didn't do anything deserving of any of this…”

“Maybe we feel it’s the least we can do for an appreciative fan?” Lance tried to rationalize.

“I’m still processing that I met you today, Lance…” Jenna replied.

“So taking you to a BBQ at Justin’s would be out of the question?” JC laughed.

“I think I might literally die,” Jenna answered.

“Guess I’d just have to save you again…”

 

It was just before noon, JC leading her back out the rear entrance and back out to the Jeep.  They buckled up, JC starting to drive off.

Jenna had a thought pop into her head.  “Where were you that you were out that way yesterday?”

“I went to the beach to clear my head a bit.  Just a lot of shit I’m dealing with right now…”

“I’m so sorry.  You wouldn’t know it, but you’re also so private.”

“I worry about my dad, he’s 70 and I worry about the cancer coming back.  Then there’s work shit.  I love making music, but dealing with labels and shit, it’s just tiring sometimes.”

“You’re at the point where you’re more picky on who you work with and what you do, and you give everything to those special projects.  Oh god, I’m not some special project, am I?”

“I’ll admit, I’m trying to find you a job, even if it’s not in education…”

“JC, you don’t have to do all of this for me…”

“I was brought into your life for a reason, Jenna.  What if this is the final culmination of that?  That yesterday was just the catalyst to lead you to an amazing career opportunity?”

“I mean, maybe.  But what if your leads don’t go anywhere either?  I don’t want to be some charity case…”

“I really don’t see it that way, Jenna.  I have disposable income, sure, but I’m not gonna blow all of it.  My mortgage is paid off, I can afford your part of rent to keep you independent…”

“Wow, that’s like THE biggest oxymoron ever.”

“You know what I mean.  Being on your own instead of with your parents again.”

“Not like I have a boyfriend I’d have to sneak in and out…”

“You are a beautiful woman, the lucky guy could be around any corner.”

He drove back to her apartment, finding a metered spot outside.  He fed the meter, walking her into the building.

“I’ll talk to you soon?” Jenna wondered.

“I mean, I hope so, I was wanting to go up, see your place…”

“Oh, ummm… ok.  What did you have in mind?”

“Binge watch Friends? I never got into it, but maybe I should.”

“There’s 10 seasons…”

“Maybe this becomes a regular thing? If I’m not working on anything, your roommate is at work, we watch Friends together?  I promise, no Netflix and Chill, just wanting to see what the fuss is about and get to know you.”

“Did you really need to preface that with the ‘no Netflix and chill’?” Jenna asked. 

“Would you have thought that’s why I was coming in?” JC countered. 

“Honestly, no. I love you and Jen together.  I know you don’t see me that way, no one does.”

“Jenna…”

“I’m seriously considering dyeing my hair, see if the redhead is throwing people off.”

“Don’t. You realize how rare being a redhead with blue eyes is?  I mean it, you're beautiful.”

“Still not your type…”

“Doesn’t mean I don’t have eyes, Jenna. Pretty sure I know my share of beautiful women, and you fall into that category, even if you don’t see it.”

A blush rose in her cheeks. “Thank you.  Let’s get up to my apartment so we can watch TV and have the focus not be on me for a bit.”

JC smiled softly, nodding silently. They took the elevator up, going down the hall to her apartment.  She unlocked the door, opening it for him. 

“Ladies first…” JC sighed. 

Jenna walked in, putting her shoes just inside the door. JC stepped in, looking around. Everything was new and modern, the couch looked comfortable but worn.

Jenna walked into the kitchen just off the entryway. “Anything to drink?”

“Just water, thanks.”  He smiled, seeing art on the fridge, clearly from her students the last year.  “What grade did you teach?”

“Kindergarten. Such a fun age.  I wish I could see them, this group was super fun. My principal put that I’m an *NSYNC fan in my Back to School packet. It made for some great parent interactions, other fans.”  She looked at the drawings on the fridge. “This one right here… Gaby drew it for me. That’s me with all of *NSYNC.  They all thought Joey was my favorite cuz I met him at the start of the school year.  They all LOVED you…”

“Why’s that?” JC laughed .

“Different reasons. Mainly cuz your name was easiest to spell… I can’t tell you how many times they draw pictures of a person and then write your name and give it to me.  You and AJ… had to have one Backstreet fan. It’s ok, she couldn’t pick AJ out of a lineup, but they could name all 5 of you guys…”

“Quality education there,” he chuckled. 

“I had no complaints from parents.  At the end of the day I’d set a timer, and if everything was cleaned up before it went off, we’d have a dance party. My alarm sound was Pop, so they loved cleaning up so they could dance. All it takes is a little bribery with *NSYNC music to get kids to do what you want.”

“Ok, let’s watch Friends to take the heat off of ME this time,” JC laughed. 

They sat on the couch, Jenna leaving some room between them. As great as this all was, she didn’t need to set herself up to get hurt thinking she stood a chance with someone like JC.

“How late does your roommate work?”

“How late are you staying?  Kelly should be off by 10 I think, assuming nothing goes wrong to extend her shift.”

“Not sure how late I’ll stay.”

“Jen won’t be expecting you home?”

“She doesn’t know I’m here.”

“JC, that’s not ok.  There’s nothing to hide. Have her meet me, FaceTime her…”

“Her boyfriend hanging out with the beautiful woman he saved. THAT won’t sound suspicious…” JC scoffed. 

“Then leave. You either want to get to know me or you don’t, but I’m not having you sneak around on Jen to do so.  You said so yourself, this is strictly platonic.”

“I never said that. Implied, sure, but not in those words.”

“Tell Jen we’re hanging out.  I want no secrets, there’s nothing to hide.  You don’t like me that way, and I’d be stupid to even try.”

JC sighed, pulling out his phone. Took Jenna to brunch, now we’re watching TV.  Not sure when I’ll be home, nothing too late. Love you.

He showed the text to Jenna before pressing send.  He knew Jen trusted him, he’d never given her reason not to, but he wasn’t sure how receptive she’d be to him spending extra time with Jenna like this.  He wasn’t sure why he felt this pull to Jenna that he did.  He recognized she was beautiful, but he loved Jen, nothing more than noticing it and moving on. 

Jenna started the show, trying not to jump in with the dialogue, letting JC discover it for himself.  She waited with baited breath for his reaction. He laughed at jokes, Jenna unsure why it was so important that he liked the show.  If he didn’t, they could always find something else.

The episode finished, Jenna looking at JC.  “So, are we watching more, or finding something else?”

“I’ll give it a try. Not sure some of the jokes would fly now…”

“Oh, they totally wouldn’t, but keep that in mind I guess.  A lot of is still funny now so that helps in watching them now. For me it’s a nostalgia thing. A lot of people went into nostalgia mode during lockdown. I won’t say I rediscovered my love for *NSYNC then, but it definitely came out harder, in a bigger way.  I mean, even before COVID I was a big Justin fan. While I had the money, I paid a lot of money to get VIP tickets to Justin’s tour.  Totally worth it and I think pushed me into hardcore fangirl mode. Oh god, now you’re gonna think I’m weird.  I admit it, I’m one of those girls…”

JC smiled softly.  “We’ve all seen an uptick in support the last few years.  It means a lot, actually. Sometimes it’s still weird to be recognized for something I did 20 years ago, but it’s always fun to interact with fans.”

“Even saving one’s life,” Jenna smiled.

“Little did I know…”

“I’d be dead right now if you’d known, wouldn’t I?” she laughed. 

“No. I still would’ve saved you.”

“Would you have waited around to see if I was ok? If you’d known when I first saw you in the hospital, would we be hanging out now?”

JC was quiet for a second.  “Yeah, I think we would. I like what I know of you so far.”

“You like that I’m an unemployed teacher?  Kinda weird thing to like.”

“You’re smart, funny, caring.  Who wouldn’t like you?”

“A lot of people.  Apparently I’m ‘extra’ in expressing my fandoms.  Always have been. Then there’s my big breakup, THE ex.”

“Do I wanna know?”

“Probably not.”

“Why not?  It helps to have someone listen.”

“I’ve been told I talk about my ex too much on dates, that’s why I don’t even have a boyfriend…”

“I’m glad this isn’t a date, then.”  He meant that to be supportive, but he soon realized his mistake when her face fell, any good feeling wiped away.  “Jenna, I’m sorry… I didn’t mean…”

“Well, this will seal the deal, then. My ex had told me when we first got together that he didn’t stay friends with exes.  Too many lingering feelings and all that.  So he messaged ALL of our friends, his and mine, after the breakup. He told them if I’m at a party or something he’s invited to, he’ll leave. If he knows I’m coming beforehand, he won’t even show up. He made our friends choose sides. I lost a lot of friends in that, at a time where I felt so alone to begin with. Only to be shown I’m not worth being friends with.”

JC sat silently for a moment before pulling her into his arms.  The move surprised Jenna. “You are worth it, Jenna. You are so worth it and I’m sorry he put you through that…”

There was pain in his voice, like he was struggling to speak. Tears that had formed in her eyes spilled over, her body wanting to shake.

“You having another seizure?” JC asked carefully.

“No, thankfully. Just really emotional.”

He looked into her eyes, they were starting to redden from the tears.  He put a hand on her cheek, his thumb rubbing against her slowly. His face moved closer to hers.  They could feel each other’s breath on their lips. 

“JC…” Jenna sighed. He gently pressed his lips to hers, only for a second.  He pulled back.

“What was that for?” Jenna wondered. 

“To let you know you’re worth something.”

“You’re with Jen…”

“It wasn’t romantic, Jenna.”

“A pity kiss for the charity case. Even better.”  She stood up, walking towards her room. “You should go…”

“Jenna, I…”

“Stop, JC. I knew this wasn’t romantic, but thank you for making that abundantly clear.”  She left the room, JC hearing the slamming of her bedroom door.

He walked to the closed door, knocking lightly on it. She wouldn’t even answer him, no words or opening the door, just silence. He leaned close and could swear he heard her crying. His heart broke, realizing he’d hurt her in a moment where he was trying to make her feel better.  He accepted her silence, going downstairs to his car and driving home. 

The drive was silent, thinking things over. How had he gotten here? He grabbed his phone, pressing a contact.

“Hey C, what’s up?”

“T, you’re in a successful relationship…”

Justin chuckled. “Successful how?”

“You’re still married, aren’t you?”

“Why is Jen mad at you?” Justin sighed. 

“Not Jen, Jenna…”

“Who?” Justin asked curiously. 

“The woman I saved after her car crash…”

“What happened?”

“I took her to brunch at Rocco’s, then I went back to her place to watch TV.  We got to talking, and she told me she didn’t have many friends, including a heartbreaking story of her ex making her friends choose sides after their breakup.”

“What did you do?”

“I hugged her, then I kissed her, but just for a second. I told her it didn’t mean anything…”

“Well, there’s your answer…”

“What?”

“You told her it didn’t mean anything?”

“Yeah…”

“Jesus, C.  Have you even MET a woman before?!”

“What?”

“She thinks it was a pity kiss, you felt bad for her.”

“I just wanted her to feel better, to know I think she’s worth getting to know.”

“The hug was probably fine. The kiss was where you went wrong.”

“I have to tell Jen, don’t I?”

“Probably, otherwise it’ll eat at you. Even though it meant nothing to you.  Which, by the way, not something you say to a woman. Like… ever.”

“I’ll tell her when she gets home from work,” JC sighed.

“Good luck, buddy…”

…

JC sat on the couch at home, spending more time analyzing and overanalyzing what had happened earlier.  He was admittedly nervous to tell Jen, even though nothing had really happened.

He heard the front door, his palms almost sweating.  Jen jumped a little when she saw him.  “I thought you were gonna be out for a while…”

“I did something stupid.”

“I’m afraid to ask, seeing the look on your face.”

“Sit down.”

Jen sat down next to JC, giving a little space between them in case she needed to be upset.  “What happened?”

“We watched an episode of Friends, then we got to talking a bit.  I listed things I liked about her, platonically, and she got really personal about a story with a shitty ex and how she lost a ton of friends.  I felt bad, she’s such a great person from what I’ve gotten to know about her, and I hugged her.”

“That’s not so bad…”

“Then I kissed her.”

“Ok, not liking that part,” Jen said.

“Just for a second, nothing romantic.  Apparently telling her it didn't mean anything was where I went wrong, according to Justin.  She felt like it was out of pity, walked into her bedroom and wouldn’t talk to me.”

“Wow… you really are an idiot.  You save her life, get to know her, and then you set up for a kinda perfect romantic moment, and tell her it meant nothing.”

“But it did.  Or Didn’t… Fuck.  I just… shit, I guess you’re right.  I mean, not out of pity, but… fuck… She said she likes the two of us together, she’d never try and get between us.  She knows she’s not my type, whatever that means.  She said it was platonic before I did…”

“But you still said it.  We started off as friends, seeing each other at parties and things Eric did.  You were with Kathryn, I didn't think I stood a chance.  If you’d told me things were platonic, even though I knew that, I don’t know that we’d be here today.  Fans know they have no chance with you, but to actually TELL them that…”

“Ok, I could see how that would be painful.  I didn’t mean it to be…”

“I know.  You have a good heart, Josh, and I love you for it.  You helped her. Saved her life.  Maybe things have run their course.”

“I suppose, yeah.  She was bothered by the fact that I was wanting to spend time with her, feeling like it was all out of pity.  Maybe she was right, and I feel like an asshole for it.”

“Don’t.  You did the right thing in that moment, pulling over, checking on her, making the 911 call.  You’ve done all you can for her, Josh.”

 

Or have I? JC wondered to himself.

Jenna had watched out her window as JC left earlier that day, honestly curious how long he would wait before leaving.  She kicked herself for not opening her bedroom door when he knocked, or telling him to come in, but it just hurt too much.

She knew that was never an option, but to hear it from his mouth, over and over in one day.  She had fallen asleep after he left, having no appetite and needing sleep to let her body heal.  Jenna lay on her back, looking up at the ceiling, contemplating how her life was shitty one moment, great for a sliver of a second, then back to shit so quickly.

She heard the front door, realizing how late it was, Kelly finally being home.  She heard a soft knock on her door, Kelly poking her head in.

“There’s no dishes out anywhere, no proof you were home.  Just wanted to check you were here.”

“Where else would I be?” Jenna sighed.  “Not like my hero is an option…”

“Ok, something happened, and I need to know, now.”

“He took me out to eat, then we came back here.”

“Oooh, some Netflix and chill?”

“No. He made that very clear. We got through one episode of Friends.  We started talking, and he said some really nice things about me. He said ‘who wouldn’t like you?’”

“And you went into self sabotage mode…”

“I told him about Steve…”

“Oh, honey, tell me you didn’t.”

“I did. He looked at me after, he looked like he was hurting for me.  He hugged me, told me I was worth more than that.  Then he kissed me.”

“What did you do?”

“Nothing. I asked why he kissed me, he said so I knew I was worth something. I brought up his girlfriend, and he said the kiss wasn’t romantic…”

“Oh, Jenna…”

“I’ve just been this pity case.  I wish he’d just never entered my life. Been some random guy that called 911, but then I never got to meet.  Instead…”

“You got your hopes up.”

“No.  I knew right away nothing would happen like that. He’s way too good looking.”

“Describe him,” Kelly pressed. 

“Mid 40s, takes good care of himself. Longish hair for a guy, but not like ponytail long. Between his ears and his shoulders.  Got the salt and pepper thing going, facial hair.  Killer blue eyes. Seriously, he's like out of a movie handsome.”

“Did you get a picture of him, or the two of you together?”

“No,” she gasped, realizing she had a bittersweet memory and no proof. If she wanted to forget it ever happened, she very well could. She didn’t want to forget, as much as it hurt.

“Well, maybe it’s for the best.  I dunno, he’s either trying really hard to convince you that it’s platonic, or to convince himself…”

“I just… I thought he liked me. I mean, not like that, but…”

“It took away that possibility, yeah.  You got his number, obviously, give him a couple days and text him or something.”

“I scared him off, I always do this. Even if he wanted to be friends, he clearly felt weird around me that it needed to be clarified. I can’t just meet a hot, established guy and find someone to settle down with, or even have as a friend.  He introduced me to one of his best friends this morning, and he said I was cool.  He owns the restaurant we went to so I got great treatment.  But to get such a short window of time where my life feels great for a while, only to come crashing down around me again…”

She started to shake, her eyes glossing over. “Jenna, oh god…” Kelly got Jenna onto the floor, letting her ride out the seizure. It wasn’t a grand mal, but did last for a while. 

Kelly kept an eye on Jenna while also getting her medications.  She opened the bottles, seeing one last pill in each bottle, her heart sinking.  She knew money was tight for Jenna, but to not have her refills, risking her health like that, it had to be bad.

She called the hospital, hoping to get something ready for when they arrived so she could go right in and not have to wait in the ER.  She was grateful for the elevator in their building, not having to take her down flights of stairs to get out. 

An hour later, Jenna was sleeping in a hospital bed, again.  Kelly was exhausted from her shift, then literally dragging her best friend in.  She grabbed Jenna’s phone, going through her recent calls out texts. She saw a string from “ Josh-Guardian Angel” and opened it. 

Hey, just giving you a heads up that Jenna is back in the hospital. She had a breakdown when I got home and is on the last of her meds. I don’t know if you wanna see her, but just letting you know. Play the boyfriend card again if you need to, but she’s not in the same unit as last time, thank god.  

Kelly gave her name and number just in case before putting the phone down and going home. 

…

JC woke up the next morning, surprised he slept at all the night before.  He was sure he hadn’t dreamed about her, but he couldn’t get Jenna out of his mind. He felt guilty about what he’d said, how he’d said it.  He just wanted to comfort her, be a friend.  

I guess BEING a friend while saying it was a bit much. She’d already said she liked me and Jen together.  I just wish she’d had a little more confidence in herself. Being unemployed probably didn’t help, then everything with that ex.  I don’t know how long ago that was, so maybe things are still fresh.  I can’t imagine being in that position. Even with my exes, we run in similar circles, we’re bound to see each other once in a while.  But to make people choose a side… 

He reached for his phone, his eyes lighting up at seeing a missed text from Jenna. His eyes widened as he read it.  Jenna was back in the hospital, and he felt like it was his fault. He’d saved her, only to hurt her.  

He sat up, looking at Jen sleeping beside him.  He couldn’t let go of this, he had to make things right somehow. 

He waited for Jen to leave for work before heading for the hospital.  He checked in with the front desk to see where she was, then checked in at the nurse’s station in her section.   Jenna was sleeping, JC catching her doctor.

“She’s running low on her medications.  Can I arrange for like 6 months worth to be bought so she has enough?”

“It doesn’t work like that, unfortunately.  We can write the prescriptions again and you can set up an automatic payment to go through each month. You can set that up while she’s sleeping so you’ll have time with her later.”

“Thanks,” JC said quietly, having no intention of seeing her and risk hurting her again. He wanted to make sure she was ok, but he wanted to give her some space. He wasn’t sure he should get too close, ruining things again by sticking his foot in his mouth.  He’d give her a few days, see if she reached out. If she did, he’d try again. If she didn’t, she clearly wasn’t interested in being friends, not that he’d blame her.

He went down to the pharmacy, getting things set up on auto pay. He then pulled out his phone.

Kelly,

I went to see Jenna. She was asleep, which is probably for the best. I didn’t mean to hurt her, and I’m sorry that it led to another seizure.  I am covering her prescriptions, she just needs to call to renew each month. If she asks, you’re paying for it, or something. Don’t tell her I am, I’m worried she’ll take it the wrong way. None of this was ever out of pity, but genuine concern that she was safe. I didn’t want her to think I was looking for some kind of reward for what I did, expecting her to sleep with me or anything like that. She’s great, and I’d like to get to know her more, but I worry me being around will only hurt her more. I’ll wait for her to text me, if she ever does. Don’t tell her, I want it to be genuine, not because she feels she has to, for my sake. If she never wants to talk to me again, I’ll be sad, but I’ll understand. Please let me know if she needs anything else, I want her to be taken care of. 

Josh

 

He walked back to Jenna’s hospital room, watching her sleep from the doorway for a few minutes.  She looked peaceful, as if none of the pain he’d accidentally caused had never happened.  He left before she woke up, hoping he’d hear from her again, someday.

“They’re really not gonna charge me for anything?” Jenna asked. 

“Yeah. Being unemployed you qualified for Medi-Cal.  Everything will be covered,” Kelly lied. She had qualified, but it wouldn’t cover everything she needed. It would help, for sure, but JC had left his information to bill things to. Kelly knew something had been arranged after speaking to people in the billing department, but they couldn’t divulge the name or information of her generous benefactor. 

“It’s been 2 and a half weeks since you had the seizures, don’t worry about anything else. Stress caused this, so stay as stress free as you can…”

“Kelly, I used the last bits of my savings to pay this month’s rent. Unless I get a job soon, unemployment isn’t going to make ends meet.”

“You let ME worry about that,” Kelly sighed. 

Jenna’s phone rang.  “Hello?”

“Yes, is this Jenna Pollard?”

“Speaking…”

“I’m with Hawthorne School, and we’d like to schedule an interview.  When are you available?”

“Oh, ummm, any time.”

“Does this afternoon work for you? Say... 2:00?”

“Sure. Absolutely. I’ll look up your address and see you then. Thank you…” Jenna stammered better hanging up.

“What was that?” Kelly wondered. 

“I have a job interview.  Funny thing is, I don’t remember sending this school a resume… I’ve sent so many, maybe I’m just losing track of everywhere I applied to?  I mean, it could be one of the first ones I applied to at the start of the summer.”

“What difference does it make?! You have an interview, and you’re going to ace it!  It’s my day off, I’ll help you get ready!”

“I’m not wearing the pantsuit again.”

“Why not? You look great in it…”

“I totaled my car, it’s bad luck.”

“Or it’s good luck cuz he saved your life that day…”

“Can we not? He hasn’t texted or called me since. He doesn’t even want to be friends.  Nothing good came out of that.”

“You’re still alive, that should count.”

“I guess.”

“You’re so glass half empty… Fine, what do you want to wear then?  That had been your go to interview outfit.”

“And maybe that’s where I went wrong. I was dressed like the admin and less like a teacher.  It’s August, maybe a dress?”

“You have that blue marbled tank wrap dress! It’s perfect. Sophisticated but fun.  I’ll help with your hair, a little makeup, I’ll even drive you there.”

“Ok. Let’s do this,” she sighed, determined to make this different. 

Her hair was pinned back on the sides, the rest down. Her eyes were in a neutral palette that made her blue eyes pop against her dress.  She finished the look with a pair of silver ballet flats she had. Kelly drove her to the school, Jenna beginning to feel intimidated.

“I don’t remember applying here, and it’s a super fancy private school. I hope I’m good enough…”

“Jenna, you got this.  You love teaching, find a way to make it shine through.  Text me when you’re done. I’m gonna run errands and I’ll be ready with a celebratory Starbucks when you’re done.”

Jenna pressed the buzzer at the gate, telling the small camera that she was there for an interview.  The gate clicked, Jenna opening it tentatively. The office was right in front, the white two story building feeling imposing. She suddenly thought back to the things JC had said about her, the positive qualities she possessed. She’d tried to push him out of her mind, but his voice and those words broke through. 

She stood taller and walked in with confidence.  She carried her leather folder with copies of her resumé, ready as she could possibly be.  She was greeted by the receptionist, given a seat waiting for the principal.  A kind faced woman walked out of an office, admittedly not what Jenna was expecting. She had a good feeling wash over her, relief and confidence and relaxation taking over her body.

…

“Hey, I need you to take me somewhere,” Jenna said over the phone.

“Where?”

“Maybe not tonight, but somewhere awesome, cuz I’m gonna teach kindergarten!!!”

“Jenna, that’s exciting!  It’s been a few hours, I was starting to get worried…”

“I went in and they wanted to see me teach a lesson after I toured the classroom, saw the kids in the summer program.  Some of them will be in my class in a couple weeks.  I saw a book on the bookshelf and went with it.  I read the book, asking them questions along the way, then we did an art lesson.  The principal was impressed.  I have my credential, but they had me take a general knowledge exam just to be sure, and now I just need to sign some paperwork and get my ID badge to start on Monday!”

“You realize what Monday is, don’t you?” Kelly asked.

“”What?”

“JC’s birthday!  OMG we HAVE to go somewhere and celebrate your new job, and I know just the place.  We’ll go on Sunday!  Shit, how will you get to work?”

“I guess I’ll take the bus…”

“No, we can’t have that.  I’ll drop you off, my shifts don’t start until later.  Even on my days off I’ll take you and then go back to sleep.  Take the bus home or whatever, but start the day without smelling like the LA bus line…  When does school start?  You said they were doing their summer program?”

“Next week is their last week of summer. The next week is to set up classrooms and stuff, do workshops and things, so it’s really perfect timing.  I’ll be working with another teacher in the room, we can have up to 30 kids in a room with 2 teachers.  I met the teacher I’ll be working with, she’s great.  I’m really looking forward to this.  School starts the following Monday, the 22nd.”

“I’m so happy for you, Jenna.  Let me grab Starbucks for us and I’ll be right there.”

…

Jenna woke up late on Sunday morning, enjoying the ability to sleep in one last time. She was excited to start her new job, going in to get things started on her classroom. 

There was a knock on her door. “Get dressed, we’re gonna be late,” Kelly said.  “Dress up a little, we’re going somewhere special.”

“Where are we going?” Jenna wondered. 

“You’ll find out once we get there.  Get up and get ready!”

Jenna got up, looking through her closet. She settled on a black jumpsuit, with a neckline that could be scoop neck, or stretch to be off one or both shoulders.  Being fancy, she opted for off both shoulders, with a simple white gold necklace. Her hair was pulled up and back into a twist, a natural eye palette and light color on her lips.  She slipped into a pair of silver strappy sandals and was ready to go.

They got into Kelly’s car, Kelly following her GPS.  Jenna began to recognize the area, especially once they got onto Sunset Blvd.  Her stomach churned as they got closer. No, please no…

“Kelly, where are we going?” she asked nervously. 

“We’re crossing off a bucket list item. We’re going to drag show brunch at Rocco’s!  I figured maybe we’ll see Lance or the birthday boy himself!”

Jenna felt like she was going to be sick. She was nervous to see either of the men Kelly was hoping to see, especially the latter of the two.  Kelly parked the car, the girls walking up to wait to get in. Jenna scanned the area nervously, hoping not to be recognized. Kelly got her reservation up on her phone for when they were ready to start seating people.

A server grabbed Jenna’s hand. “Girl, you should have said you were coming! Let’s get you girls a table right up front!”

Kelly gave Jenna a look. “You know him?”  Jenna shrugged, not fighting the option of getting a better table. The server scanned Kelly's ticket before taking them in. “Let me know what you want, ANYTHING ladies.”

“Give us a minute to look over the menu,” Kelly said quietly. The server nodded but walking away.  “I know red hair is rare, and you’re beautiful, but this is a gay bar. He’s acting like he knows you…”

“Working for a big tip, I guess,” Jenna tried to play things cool.  She looked over the menu, it being different than the ones she saw the last time she was there.

The server returned to take their order. “I’ll take the eggs benedict and a glass of pineapple juice,” Jenna ordered. 

“She’ll also take the chocolate chip pancakes, we’ll share the avocado toast, and I’ll have the rainbow waffle stack and a bloody Mary.”

“Anything to drink drink?” the server asked Jenna.

“I shouldn’t mix with my medications. Can we do like a mai tai, heavy on the pineapple juice but light on the alcohol?”

“I’ll grab that for you,” a male voice said as he approached their table. Kelly’s jaw dropped as Jenna’s face reddened as the man walked away. 

“Was that… Lance Bass?!” Kelly whisper yelled.

“Pretty sure, yup…”

“Oh my GOD, he’s getting our drinks himself!”

A few minutes later, Lance returned with their drinks, sitting down next to Jenna. “I’m glad your server recognized you, it’s good to see you again,” Lance smiled, hugging Jenna. 

“Wait, you’ve met before?  You met Lance and didn’t tell me?!”

“Kelly, stop…”

“Yeah, she was here a couple weeks ago…”

Kelly’s jaw dropped. “Wait, did she come here for brunch?”

“Oh god, no…” Jenna gasped, realizing what was happening. 

“Yeah.  She came with…”

“Don’t say it…” Jenna begged quietly. 

“You went to a restaurant his friend owned. He’s Josh in your phone…”

“Kelly…”

“JC CHASEZ SAVED YOUR LIFE?!” Kelly screamed, people turning to look at them. 

 

“And now I wish I was dead,” Jenna sighed. 

“Keep it down, Kelly…” Jenna begged.  “Yes, JC is the one who made the call.”

“It all makes sense now.  I saw him leave the ER that day, the reason why you got hurt the way you did.”

“What?” Lance wondered.

“He didn't tell you?  This didn’t make the group chat?” Jenna asked Lance.

“Shut up, you made the group chat?” Kelly asked excitedly.

“Not now…” Jenna replied.  “After we came here, we went up to my place to watch TV.  He assured me several times things were strictly platonic.  We got to talking, and I told him how I don’t really have that many friends.  My intensity for my fandoms is apparently off putting, and my ex made all our friends choose sides after our breakup.  He listed great qualities about me, how I deserved better.  He hugged me, looking sad, as if it was happening to him.  Then he kissed me, promptly ruining it by saying it meant nothing.  I felt like such a pity project, something to stroke his ego…”

“Jenna, I know JC, that’s not him at all.  He genuinely cares about you, making sure you were ok,” Lance assured her.

“It’s true,” Kelly agreed.  “When you went back into the hospital after what he said, I unlocked your phone, found his number, and sent him a text.  He came to see you the next day, Jenna.  He’s been texting me, not a lot, but he’s paying for your pills, paying whatever insurance doesn’t cover of your hospital stays, doctor visits, all of it’s being billed to him.  I’ll hand you my phone if you want.”

“If he’s been doing all of this, why hasn’t he texted ME since all of this?” Jenna wondered.

“Because he wanted to make sure you were ok.  He was afraid it would give you another seizure or something.  He hopes you’ll make contact, eventually.  He’s still being your guardian angel, looking out for you.”

“Then what are you ladies here for, if you didn't know we’d met?” Lance asked Kelly.

“I got a new job, so we’re here to celebrate.  I’ll be teaching kindergarten.  It all happened so fast, literally getting a call to come in and interview on Friday.  I hadn’t even applied to their school, but they found me somehow.  I even asked the principal about it, and they said someone had referred me, so I guess I need to thank an old coworker somewhere…  Do you think I should contact him?”

“I won’t lie,” Lance sighed, “he’s been a bit out of sorts since that day.  So maybe you should, if you feel comfortable.  If he wants to give you space, then take your time.”

“I’ve been trying to keep it out of my head, but something he said popped into my head yesterday, and I think it helped in my interview.  It was kinda nice, thinking JC cared about me, not just pitied me…”

“I really think he does,” Kelly said.  “I doubt he’d go this far out of his way for someone out of pity.”

“That’s not who he is.  I think you know that already,” Lance said softly.  

“He’s not gonna be here today, is he?” Jenna asked, worried.

“Probably not. He tells me in advance. He’s got some dinner thing with Eric tomorrow night, I know that…”

“Eric?” Jenna asked. 

“His manager…” Lance said.  “Surprised you didn’t know that.”

“Like I said, I’m a Justin girl with JC tendencies,” she shrugged, pink warning her cheeks in embarrassment. 

“I feel those tendencies are going to become more frequent,” Kelly smiled. 

“No. He’s made it clear he doesn’t have feelings for me like that.  Just getting to be friends with him, if I can call it that, is enough.”

Their food arrived, Lance leaving them to eat and enjoy the drag show in peace. If only Jenna could have peace, her mind racing with excitement for her new job, but also curious of what she should do about JC.

“I can see why JC loves coming here, these drag queens are AMAZING!” Kelly said.  “I wonder which one he wrote that song about, and if we’ll ever get to hear it…”

“Doubtful,” Jenna sighed.  “The closest we get is someone else singing his songs at this point.  We all know that’s not the same as hearing it from him.”

“You’re talking about him, that’s a good sign,” Kelly noted.

“I’m not ready to contact him, Kelly.  Not yet.  It really hurt, like he didn’t want me to get the wrong idea with things.”

“He didn’t, and you don’t want to split them up anyway, God knows why…”

“Because they love each other.  You see how they look at each other when they’re pictured together.  Like it’s straight out of a fairy tale.”

“You know that’s not how things happened, right?  If anything, how YOU met him…”

“Stop.  Stop putting ideas in my head that will never happen.  This was a mistake, we never should have come here.  Now you know and you’re not gonna drop it.  Like I’m the heroine in a romantic Hallmark movie, the nobody that makes a pop star fall in love and go for his dreams.  That’s not what’s happening.  I’m a friend, at most, a sidenote on his life if we’re being brutally honest.  At some point this is going to end.  I’m not from his world.  Lance is nice to me because JC told them about me.”

Kelly’s eyes widened, Jenna feeling a hand on her shoulder.  “You don’t really think that, do you?”

Jenna looked up, seeing Lance once again.  “I'm nobody, Lance.  If JC hadn’t brought me in here, you’d have no interest in me beyond being a customer or fan.”

“I’ll give you that, but once he brought you in, I got to know you, I could see why he likes you, even as a friend.   I’m sorry that he made you feel a certain way, but it wasn’t meant to hurt you.  If I didn’t like you, I wouldn’t have told you to come back, and if you did, I wouldn’t have come to your table, twice…”  

“I guess I hadn’t thought of that,” Jenna admitted.

“You are welcome here any time, I mean that.  If we’re having an event here or at Heart, let JC or me know and I’ll get you on the VIP list.”

“It’s so weird, we figured we’d meet you like this, but to actually have it happen…” Kelly sighed.  “Though we’re missing JC.”

“Been there, done that,” Jenna smiled.

“Are you going with her to Pop2000?” Lance wondered.

“No, I can’t get the time off.  It’s just a couple days, but other people asked for it off with better reasons than to see a former pop star host a concert.”

“You really didn't tell them that, did you?” Lance chuckled.

“No.  But I still got denied time off.”

“She’s a nurse.  At least now I’ll have time off built into my life.  I can’t wait to start tomorrow.  Most of the room is set up already, just need to reset some of it for the start of the year.  We’ll pick borders and stuff for the boards, move the desks around.  We won’t have class lists yet, so we can’t make their tags for desks and cubbies and stuff yet…”

“Wow, you are excited, aren’t you?” Lance chuckled.

“She could go on and on if you let her.  Ask her what she did for an impromptu lesson she did during her interview…”

“I just wanted to come by and say hi one more time.  I’m glad you came in, Jenna.  Your whole meal is on me, it was a treat seeing you and I hope you talk to JC soon.  Sounds like it might be good for both of you if you do.  When you’re ready…”

“Thanks, Lance,” Jenna smiled softly.

They left  Rocco’s after the show, getting back into Kelly’s car.  “Ok, am I allowed to freak out now?” Kelly asked.

“Can we get out of the parking lot first?”

 

“Fine…”  Kelly drove out of the parking lot, turning to head towards their apartment.  “Cover your ears,” Kelly warned, before giving the loudest scream she could.  “I just met Lance and JC saved your life!  OMG, how is this real life?!”  Kelly proceeded to blast *NSYNC the rest of the way home, Jenna smiling as she thought about what Lance had said.

JC sat on his deck watching the sunrise with his hot mug of coffee in hand. It had already been doctored with a good measure of Maker's. He was trying to ward off the foul mood he had been in for the last few days. He woke up over an hour before, not able to sleep so he had come out and sat.

Today he was 46. And what the hell did he have to show for it? He had a house in the hills and could live comfortably for the rest of his days, and a beautiful girlfriend. But, all he felt was empty. He was running on fumes and had been for awhile.

He was working with a new artist he couldn't stand, doing appearances for Eric when need be. But otherwise, nothing. He had messed up the one good thing that had happened to him in a while.  Sticking his foot in his mouth with her had really screwed with his mind somehow and he couldn't shake it.  Even knowing she was taken care of wasn't enough.  He had been thinking about her constantly.

He stood and walked to the edge of the balcony, looking out over the valley. People kept asking him what he wanted for his birthday. He finally had an answer for them. Peace. He wanted peace of mind. Just a little peace.

…

Jenna stood in front of her mirror getting ready for her new adventure in life.  She could barely sleep the night before thinking about how to set up their room. What her lesson plans were gonna be like. How her co teacher was gonna be. Excited did not describe how she felt at the moment.

She heard Kelly humming a familiar tune as she walked out into the kitchen. She found her there, making coffee and she had small cupcakes set out with happy birthday logos on them. 

"Good morning," Kelly said, handing her a cupcake.  Jenna smiled and took the cupcake and set it down. 

"Are you gonna contact him today?" Kelly asked

"I don't know." Jenna said, shaking her head. She was still really hurt by what he had said, but blown away by what all he had done for her.

"Come on, Jenna. Put him out of his misery and at least wish him a happy birthday  You know you want to.”

She looked at the cupcake. She slid out her phone and went to the text string with his name on it and tapped out a message and sent it. 

Hey. Just wanted to say thank you.  You are a great guardian angel. Hope your birthday is good one, you deserve it. Jenna

…

His phone chimed and he pulled it out of the pocket of his jeans.

His heart skipped a beat when he saw that it was a message from Jenna.  He read it and smiled.  He tapped out a message and sent it back.

Hearing from you was the best birthday gift I could have received today. Thank you.

He could not help the grin that spread across his face as he made his way back upstairs to the bedroom. He laid down on the bed, and fell fast asleep with the smile still on his face.

…

"I just don't understand why you don't want to go to this dinner. Eric has done a lot to make this happen for you and your birthday, Josh."

"I don't care, Jen. I don't want to go. I'm tired of being the one that gets him photographed everywhere. I just want to stay home, kick back and have a beer and watch TV or a movie.  It’s not about me. It's about publicity . " 

"What do I tell him? That you have lost your mind? Or maybe you are finally having a midlife crisis?" 

JC’s blood started to boil, the good vibe he had after Jenna’s text was gone. He stood up and grabbed his keys off the table. "I don't give a damn what you tell them, or him.  I'm out." He walked past her and to the front door, Jen hot on his heels.

"Josh, what's wrong with you? " she asked with genuine concern. He never acted like this. 

"Nothing," he said, starting the Jeep and driving away before she could say anything else .

…

Jenna had just gotten home from the bus stop when her phone began to buzz. It was a number she did not recognize, but she answered anyway. 

"Hello? "

"Hello, is this Jenna?" A deep bass voice asked.

"Lance? " she said with surprise.

He laughed, and said, "I guess my voice gives me away."

She giggled. "What's going on? Wait, how did you get my number?!" 

"First things first. I was wondering if you had heard from JC?"

"No. I sent him a birthday text this morning and he responded but not since then. Why? "

"He and Jen got into it, and he left the house around noon. No one has seen or heard from him since. " 

"You want me to call him, see if he answers? "

"Only if you want to."

"Let me call him. I'll call you right back."

She hung up from Lance and dialed JC’s number. 

It rang and rang and rang, then went to voicemail.  She waited until she heard the tone and said,  "JC….It's me. Lance called me. You have everyone worried. Call someone back. Please. " 

She called Lance back.  "He wouldn't answer for me either."

"Justin went out looking for him.  This is not like him. "

 

"Can we come back to my second question for a moment? How did you get my number?"

 

Lance chuckled.  "Let's just say I stole it from JC's phone one day.  If nothing else, it let me put you in my phone for when you come to an event.  Now you have my number to tell me directly, in case you aren't talking to JC beyond wishing him a happy birthday."

“I will Lance, when I’m ready.  It felt nice though, getting back into things with him.  I hope he’s ok.  We know he hides form the public, but to hide from his friends…”

“He doesn’t wanna go to the dinner Eric is doing.  I think it’s because of you.  He wants to make things right somehow.”

“We will, I hope.  Someday, somehow.”

“If this was a musical, now would be a great segue into a musical number…”

“I gotta go, it’s my first of my new job.  It’s just us for now, but still…”

 

“OK.  Bye, Jenna.”  There was silence as he waited for her to say goodbye.

 

"Lance…?

"Yeah?”

"Please keep me in the loop. "

"Will do."

…

Justin had gone to all of JC’s haunts, and found nothing. Now he was really getting worried. Until finally, when he was driving through the parking lot at the Pier on Santa Monica Beach. He finally saw JC’s Jeep. Once he saw it, he knew where he was. 

He walked up the old Boardwalk to the surf shop and walked in the open door. And there he was, standing there talking to the owner of the shop, Jerry.

"Bout time you showed up," JC said, without missing a beat, not even looking at Justin, seeing him in his periphery.

 “I've been looking for you for hours.  What the hell man? Hey Jerry." Justin said, shaking the old man's hand.

"I didn't want to be found…" JC sighed.

"Let's walk man," Justin said, and Jerry went to help a customer.

"Jen called you, didn't she?"

"No. Lance did.  We are all worried about you. " 

"I'm not gonna jump off the pier, T. I just needed some space. " 

"That thing with Jenna still has you fucked up, doesn't it?” he asked as they moved down the sidewalk. 

 “I guess." 

"Has she made contact?" 

"This morning.  She sent me a text." He grinned thinking about it.

"Maybe you should go talk to her, now that she made contact. You and I both know you won't be at peace with yourself until you do."

"Maybe " 

"What do you want me to tell them? "

"That I'm safe.  But I want to be left alone."

Justin shook his head and took out his phone.

…

Jenna set herself up for a night of Friends and pizza. She had just sat down on the couch when the buzzer buzzed on the door. She got up and went to the door and hit the button.

"Can I help you?"

"It's me," the male voice said into the speaker. She hit the button again and waited. Minutes later, there was a light tap on the front door.

She stood up and went to the door, and opened it. There stood a somewhat disheveled JC in front of her. 

"Get in here," she said, ushering him in the door, shutting it behind her. He opened his arms to her, and she gladly went into them. He engulfed her with those arms. They stood there for several minutes like that. He kissed the top of her head, and let out a big sigh.  

Jenna looked up at him and asked, "Are you ok?" 

"I am now," he smiled, feeling better than he had in weeks. 

"Happy birthday, JC ." 

“It is now," he said, releasing her. He saw the pizza on the coffee table. "Got any more of that?" 

"Yeah. On the counter, beers are in the fridge." 

"Do you mind? I'm starving. "

 

"No. Not at all. Go sit, I'll get it," she said as he went and sat on the couch. She walked the plate and beer over to him and sat down next to him. 

 

They sat and ate and watched Friends in silence for a long time. He had worried it would be an awkward silence, but it was comfortable, Jenna unconsciously scotting closer to him on the couch.  His body was aware of her warmth against him, lifting his arm for her to scoot further into him.  This is nice.  I missed this, I missed her.  I finally got what I wanted, somewhat.

They didn’t talk about what had happened the last time he was there.  Things were comfortable, as if nothing had happened at all.  They both knew that wasn’t true, but were feeling good about things not being awkward between them at the moment.  Eventually, he noticed that she had gone to sleep with her head against his shoulder and he pulled her tighter into his arms and continued to watch the show, sinking down into the couch. The exhaustion of the day finally hit and he drifted off as well.

Jenna looked around at her classroom, the walls bare of student work, feeling the need to be filled.  She went through the books in the student and teacher libraries, noting which books from her own collection to bring in. 

She heard the door open, seeing her co-teacher walk in. She was shorter than Jenna, straight blonde hair, about 5 years older than Jenna.

“Wear your fandom on your sleeve, do you?” she asked. 

“What gave me away?” Jenna laughed. 

“Between the music playing and your shirt… I was crazy for New Kids back in the day. Still am I guess.”

“Did you see them when they were here a couple months ago?”

“I grabbed Donny’s hand as they were heading to the rear stage…”

“Justin grabbed my hand at a show in 2019…”

“It’s amazing how things stick with you, isn’t it?”

“Kim, what else can I do before we get our class lists?”

“Well, what theme do you want for the borders? You can check the supply closet to see what they have, or just go to Lakeshore and pick a theme.”

“What would you think of stars?” Jenna asked with a smile.  

“I’m fine with it,” Kim answered. “Might as well go to Lakeshore and get name tags, stuff for their cubbies, all of that.  You wanna go and do that while I go through the curriculum binders and get what we’ll need for the first couple months pulled out?”

“Sure.  I wanna see what your lesson plans and such look like and all that.”

“I’ll show you that tomorrow. For now, go to Lakeshore and we’ll get the room set up as best we can.”

“Ummm, I don’t drive. I mean, I DO, but I don’t have a car and my license is suspended…”

“Is there something I need to know?”

“I have epilepsy. Most days, I win. Last month I had a big one and crashed my car, was pretty banged up. I have medication I take, but extreme stress can cause them, too. I have to stay seizure free for 3 months before the DMV will let me drive again.”

“I’ll drive us then, we can pick up some food on the way back.”

“Sorry,” Jenna sighed. 

“Nothing to apologize for.  Hopefully you stay mostly better.  At least I know now instead of if you have one during class or something.”

“Hopefully that never happens, but yeah…”

They walked to the parking lot and got to Kim’s car. The drive was about half an hour, typical LA traffic, giving them time to talk. 

“Is Justin your favorite guy from *NSYNC? I mean, he grabbed your hand…”

“Well, he is.  But I met Joey at a show he did in Vegas last year, and I saw Lance and JC at Lance’s restaurant last month. I’m going to meet Chris next month, flying up after school to a show he’s doing up north of San Francisco.”

“Wow, that’s pretty cool.  Who was the nicest?”

“Well, they each were in different ways. I always thought of JC as this enigma, but he’s really just a laid back guy. Lance covered my meal, which was nice. Joey was super sweet, I saw him two weeks after my grandfather died, so that was special by itself. I feel like I picked the right group of guys to be a fan of.”

“I’d say so.  Out of curiosity, why do you want the star theme?”

“I’ve always loved stars, wishing on them, watching meteor showers or the night sky when it’s pitch black and I’m somewhere with no lights to ruin my view.  Then there’s the subtle *NSYNC reference. They got a star on the Walk of Fame, there’s a star in their name and logo. I feel like it comes full circle a bit.”

“You know what you COULD do…” Kim started. 

“Hmm?”

“I say we make a boyband theme. Do stars, definitely, but use our boys for different things around the classroom. Maybe like ‘step by step, walk inside’.  Something like that.”

“I love it!” Jenna smiled, knowing this was going to be a great year.

“The moms will love it, for sure,” Kim laughed. 

“Something I did with my last class was to set a timer as they packed up for the day. If they could finish before the timer went off, we’d have a face party to my timer alarm.”  Jenna pulled out her phone, pulling up the clip of Pop that she’d bought as a ringtone. 

“I like it!” Kim replied.

“I also use Justin’s song from Trolls, GoNoodle did a dance along video to the song, it’s great on hot or rainy days when we can’t go outside.”

“I think this is the beginning of a beautiful friendship, Jenna.  This is going to be a fun year.”

“I think so too,” Jenna smiled.

…

They finished putting up the borders, putting the large stars up where their student work would go, the room full of stars on just about everything.  They even bought magnetic borders for the white board, to split up the workspace.

“Tomorrow I can show you a sample of boardwork we’ll have them do, get started on the first week’s worth except for their names.  It’s pretty simple.  Let’s grab plenty of the lined paper we need from the supply closet.”

“Will we look at curriculum and such too?  I can help with lesson plans and things…”

“It’s almost 3:00, let’s wrap up here and call it a day.  Do you need a ride home?”

“I can take the bus,” Jenna answered.

“Yeah, that’s a no.  Summer school is over, let me pick up Olivia and we’ll take you home.”

“Olivia?”

“My daughter.  She’ll be in kindergarten this year.  She’ll be in one of the other rooms, you can’t teach your own child.”

They walked next door and got Olivia, an almost spitting image of her mother.  They walked to Kim’s car and Jenna began guiding her home.

Her phone buzzed, a smile on her face.

Good day at work?

Got the room mostly set up until I get the kids’ names.  I’m just lucky they’re paying me for it.  It’s usually unpaid for the staff to set up their rooms, which sucks.  Everyone else gets paid starting next week, once they start requiring teachers to be here.  Anyone setting up now is doing so without pay.

There’s always some way to get people to work hard for what they love but also take the joy out of it.  I know what it’s like to work your ass off and have nothing to show for it.

You guys all got screwed the first few years, but I can see how that could also be your solo career.  You have plenty to show for it, the Internet is full of proof, and the fans you still have, clamoring for any tidbit they can get.  Kim, my co-teacher, ran with my star theme for our classroom, and we’ll have some *NSYNC themed little posters around the room.

How do you mean?

For example, and this is only an idea so far… A picture of you guys in the doctor scrubs from the NSA tour, and the text will say “It makes me ill when you don’t wash your hands.”  An artist on Instagram made a picture of you guys from Sesame Street that says “Believe in Yourself”, things like that.

Wow, that’s oddly cool.  I’d love to see this classroom when you’re finished. Send me pictures?

Yeah, I guess JC Chasez coming to my school would attract attention.

Not as much as you’d think.  Your school is THE school for the Hollywood elite.  I think you’ll be surprised by some of the families that attend the school.

I guess I’ll have to find out.  Kim is driving me home, so I really should be paying more attention.  Talk to you later, see you Friday.

“Texting your boyfriend?” Kim wondered.

“No boyfriend.  Remember how I told you about my accident?  I was texting the guy that saved me, he saw everything and made the 911 call.”

“All I know is you had the biggest smile on your face just then.  Seemed like something from a special someone.  Definitely sounds special now that I have some backstory.”

“Special, yes.  Boyfriend?  No.  He’s seeing someone.”

“Not for long, I’m sure.”

“It’s not like that.  We’re just friends.”

“That smile says otherwise.”

“He saved my life.  I’m allowed to smile like that for someone who saved my life.”

“Jenna, you’re really pretty.  Like Ariel when she’s not a mermaid…” a little voice in the backseat said.

“Thank you, Olivia.  I almost wish I wasn’t teaching with your mommy so I could have you in my class.”

They reached Jenna’s apartment, Jenna saying goodbye before walking into the building.  She took the elevator up to her floor, walking down the hall and unlocking her door.  Kelly was on the couch.

“Check the kitchen table,” Kelly called.

Jenna looked, her eyes bulging as she saw a beautiful floral arrangement.  Simple, but beautiful.  She looked at the card.

Not sure how your day went, but hoping it went well.  Can’t wait for Friday.  See you soon.

“If I didn't know better, I’d swear you’re gonna be the next Chasez girlfriend…” Kelly smirked.

“Stop, Kelly.”

“JC Chasez sends you flowers for no reason, excited to see you on Friday for pizza and TV.  He’s into you.”

“He isn’t.  I like him and Jen together.  He’s being really nice, but only to make up for what happened.”

 

“Tell yourself that on Friday…”

What time am I picking you up?

Not sure. It’s summer, so the parents have to come in to pick up their kids. You could come in and see the classroom.  Kim had to take her daughter to a doctor’s appointment, so I’m just working on board work papers for the kids.  I can show you the mini posters we came up with.

Sure, why not? No one is there right now, as far as parents, right?

You should be good.  The code for the gate is 7435. If anyone asks, you’re with me.

Got it. 

Jenna was suddenly excited, the thought of JC seeing her classroom, seeing her in general.  She continued what she was doing, using a highlighter to write letters on lined paper for the children to trace.  They figured it gives everyone a level playing field at first and allows the teachers to see who needs more assistance.

She heard a knock on the door before it opened.  She looked up, surprised to see JC so soon. “That was fast…”

“I was already in the area,” he shrugged, walking towards her desk.  She stood as he opened his arms to greet her with a hug.

They held the hug longer than they should have, each not wanting to let the other go.  Jenna finally pulled back.

JC looked around the room. “Nice setup. Colorful, it came out really great.”  He looked at the sign above the sink. Sure enough there was a picture from the No Strings Attached tour when they were in the doctor coats for It Makes Me Ill. 

“You really made this,” he chuckled.

“Look above the whiteboard…” Jenna suggested. 

He looked, large colorful letters saying “Do Your Thing” on the wall, surrounded by lots of smaller stars.

Their daily schedule made him smile. Next to the morning board work it said “Here We Go”, and next to dismissal it said “Bye Bye Bye”.  He looked confused by what was next to lunch. 

“What’s with lunch?” he wondered. 

“It’s a Justin and Joey thing from an MTV thing you guys did. There’s a little song they made up…” She pulled out her phone and played a video of it on YouTube.

“I should’ve known,” JC chuckled. He looked at the papers on her desk. “What’s that?”

“Morning board work. For a while it’ll just be tracing letters and numbers on the paper, then they’ll move to writing down things we put up on the board. They use it to review things, especially once they really get into math and their spelling lists.”

“Do they get homework?”

“Yeah, but it’s all easy. Well, I guess it’s easy cuz we’re adults… Kim has been teaching here for a while, she knows what they can handle.”

“Do you need to finish that before we go?”

“Oh, let me show you something by the cubbies…”

Jenna walked him over, and on the wall between the cubbies and the door was a little sign with a mirror in the middle. The sign read “Who’s having a great day? It’s gonna be ME!”

“Ok, I need that around my bathroom mirror,” JC laughed. 

“We can go. Did anyone give you any trouble?”

“No. Just put the code in. I did ask a teacher which room you were in, you left that bit out of your text.”

“Sorry.  I also figured you wouldn’t be coming in, I’d come out to your car in the parking lot.”

“Fair enough moving forward, but you invited me to see your room without telling me which one it was,” he laughed. 

“At least you know where my bedroom is,” she smirked, her eyes practically popping out of her head once she heard what she’d said. “I didn’t mean that… I meant… shit.”  She buried her face in her hands as they rode to her apartment. 

“You’re fine, Jenna.  We’ll watch some Friends, order some pizza, and forget all about it.”

…

“Kelly should be home soon, you wanna watch a couple more episodes or call it a night? I’m sure Jen misses you…”

“I guess I’ll go, I’ve been here almost 6 hours.  I look forward to this though, a few hours relaxing and sharing pizza with you.  Hearing about your day or week…”

“It’ll be really fun once school starts. Next week is boring, more setup and meetings and boring stuff that could’ve been an email.  We get to be in this nice little theater for the keynote speaker, they’ll feed us too, so I guess that’s ok. I just wanna meet my kids.”

“How many will you have?”

“Up to 30, but probably closer to 25. At least there’s two of us.  My last job I had that many by myself.”

“Still sounds like a lot. I can barely handle my two nieces.  Never saw myself having kids, my lifestyle certainly doesn’t help.”

“You mean having money to pay a nanny?  Justin does fine, and he’s super busy.”

“Cuz he’s all over the place. Me, I focus so hard on whatever I’m working on. I worry that would get in the way of a family.”

“I guess that part makes sense, but I know plenty of driven people that became great parents and found a work/life balance.”

“I’m 46, Jenna.”

“Chris was your age when he had Nash…”

“Fair enough.  How did this get to be about me?” JC laughed. 

“Once you said you never saw yourself having kids…”

“I should go now before you critique me some more.”

“Hey, if you and Jen are happy, then that’s what matters.  Anyone that knows you will respect what you want.”

“You ever want kids?” JC asked. 

“I guess that’s why I teach.  Never found the right guy to settle down with. The one I did changed his mind.  Some things aren’t in the cards, no matter how much you want them,” she shrugged. She’d made peace with being over 35 and not being married or having kids, knowing Kelly was right there with her.  Not that Kelly wanted kids, but still. 

“But you wanted them?” he asked, sensing disappointment.

“Yeah. But I was in my twenties then, I had my whole life ahead of me. Career, marriage, kids, in my head I had it all.”

“You still could.  Any guy would be lucky to have you.”

“Tell THEM that, Jenna comes with a high recommendation from JC Chasez…” she laughed. 

“I’ll put an ad out in the papers.”

“Do people even READ papers anymore?”

“Fine, I’ll post it on my Instagram page, see how quickly that gets shared.”

“By the wrong people, people either jealous of me for getting such a report, or people thinking we slept together to get it.”

“I mean, if it helps,” he chuckled.  “Sorry, that was in poor taste.  I’ll get going, but it’ll be nice to have this every week.  Talk to you soon, Jenna.”

“Let me know you got home safe.  Tell Jen I said hi, and thank you for letting me borrow her boyfriend for a while.”

JC planned to do no such thing, knowing full well he’d lied to Jen about where he was.

…

“JC was gone and you were in bed by the time I got home last night.  He didn't stick his foot in his mouth again, did he?”

“No.  We hung out a little earlier than expected, and he decided to go home.  I didn’t want Jen to worry too much about him being with another woman, especially for over 6 hours…”

“You sure it was just Netflix, no chill?”

“Plenty of chill, just not the kind you mean.  We just watched Friends and ate pizza.  He had a beer, I had an Arnold Palmer.  Nothing more than friends watching Friends.”

“You keep saying that…”

“Because it’s true.  As much as I MIGHT be getting a crush on him, he’s a celebrity, I’m a teacher.  He already has a beautiful girlfriend that checks all the boxes of what his type is.  I’m none of that.  Hair color, eye color, all wrong.  I don’t look like Eva, or Kathryn, or Jen.  We’re friends and that’s all it’ll ever be.  I like him because he’s 1/5th of my favorite band, and I never thought I’d get to meet him, let alone see him and text him on a regular basis.  I’m living my best life just being friends with him, I don’t need more than that.”

“It’s been years since you’ve been properly fucked, I know the toys in your nightstand would agree with me…”

“That’s not where things are going with JC.  He kissed me once, it’s not like he’s gonna sleep with me.  I mean, sex.  He’s already SLEPT with me, but you know what I meant.”

“I did, and I say it’s bound to happen someday.  Men and women can’t just be friends.”

“If that’s true, maybe I need to hang out with Justin more.  If I’m gonna split up a relationship, at least get a man with kids so I can be a mom…”

“You know you’d hate yourself for splitting them up.”

“Yet you’re pushing me to break up JC and Jen…”

“They’re not married with kids.  You can get as close to Justin as you want, but you'd hate to be the other woman.  The media would be much more forgiving of you with JC than Justin.”

“Neither are an option, so let’s drop it.  He’s happy with her, I'm happy I get to even be friends with him, let’s just call it even.”    

“Ok, I’m sorry.  I just want to see you happy, you need a guy in your life.”

“I have a guy in my life, a great one, and it doesn’t involve sex or ways my heart can break all over again.  Life is good for once, and I’m tired of waiting for the other shoe to drop.”

Kelly looked at her phone, scrolling through Instagram.  “Hey, there’s something at Heart on Friday, and something at Rocco’s before that.  Wanna celebrate the first week of your new job with some partying with your new friends?”

“You’re using me to hang out with Lance and Michael, aren’t you?”

“Maybe… I mean, Lance loves you, though.  In a platonic way.”

“So does JC.  It could be fun.  What’s the thing at Rocco’s?”

“Drag Queen karaoke.  You LOVED doing karaoke back in the day, before COVID.”

“They’re gay bars, so I’m less likely to get hit on while wearing something sexy.”

“Even though that’s exactly what you need…”

“I’ll try and DM Lance…” Jenna said, pulling out her phone.  She opened Instagram, her eyes widening.  “Holy shit…”

“What?”

“Lance posted a story, but it’s got the green circle… I’m on his favorites list!”

“DM him, I’m sure he’ll respond!”

Hey Lance, any chance Kelly and I can come to the events at Rocco’s and Heart next Friday?  Not asking for VIP, but what do we do to get in?

Her eyes bulged as she saw the 3 dots.  “He’s replying!  Lance is replying!!! How is this real life, Kelly?!”

Hey!  Just show up for the thing at Rocco’s and we’ll take you over to Heart.  We’re definitely taking pictures together in the booth, so you better look amazing!  I can send Lisa over to get you some great outfits…

We’re good, but thank you for the offer.  I’m just some woman, I don’t need all this fuss.

JC has let you into his life.  We know what a big deal that is.  I’ll let him know you’re going, see if they’ll wanna go to both.  Close down Heart with us, it’ll be a blast!

Ok, see you then.  Can’t wait!

 

She put her phone down.  “We’re going shopping, Kelly…”

“Are you ready?” Kelly asked. 

“So ready. Nervous, but excited.”

“If I didn’t know any better, you were getting ready for sex, not to teach kindergarten…”

Jenna playfully shoved Kelly. She’d worn a royal blue wide strapped tank and light grey capris, with blue shoes that matched her top. Her hair was pulled back, not wanting it in her face. It was the end of August, still very much in summer.  She wanted to be comfortable but also look professional.  

She gave herself a once over in the full length mirror on the back of her bedroom door.  She pulled out her phone, snapping a picture.

Ready for my first day of school!

It was early, so she was surprised when she got a text back. 

You look great.  Have a great first day. Do your thing ;)

She smiled to herself, ready to begin her day.  She and Kelly went down to Kelly’s car, getting a ride to school. Kelly turned her stereo all the way up, blasting her *NSYNC station on Spotify. 

“I don’t think JC would let you play this if he was taking you to work,” Kelly laughed. 

“Probably right. He seemed impressed by the *NSYNC references I have around the classroom, though.”

“You need a picture of you with him and Lance to put on your desk. Or on the wall, somewhere to remind you every day of the lucky bitch you are.”

“You’re lucky by association.  I know I’m excited about my first day, but I can’t wait for Friday to wear the outfit I got.”

“I totally wasn’t expecting it, but I love it and you seem so confident in it. Some guy is gonna notice, you just might turn somebody Friday night…”

Jenna made sure she got there early so Kelly wouldn’t have to worry about the long line of cars for drop off. Summer has been light traffic compared to what was to come. 

Jenna turned down the music as they approached the school, Kelly turning into the parking lot. 

“Have a good day at school, sweetheart,” Kelly joked. 

“That’s the plan,” Jenna smiled. 

She got out of the car, walking to the gate.  She put in her code to get in, putting her lunch away in the staff room.  She saw a spread of breakfast type foods on the table, along with juice and extra coffee fixings.  There was a small sign on the table that read: Have a great first day! -Admin

“How personal,” Jenna said quietly.

“Hey, they’re feeding us, don’t complain,” Kim smiled as she walked in.  “They do this from time to time, especially the first and last days of school.  You ready?”

“Yeah.  Everything is ready and in place for them- name tags, cubbies, everything.  All we need now is our kids in the room.”

They walked to their room, getting situated before opening their door to students.  They began to hear students outside, their classroom facing the playground.  The students lined up with their parents, anxiously awaiting the door to open.  Excitement buzzed in the air.  

Kim stepped to the door, her hand on the doorknob.  “You ready? Kim asked.

“Here we go,” Jenna smiled.

…

The first half of the day had gone smoothly.  They traced papers, practiced how to line up, got their spots on the rug for math time and reading, mostly going over procedures of how to transition from one thing to another.  They practiced unpacking their backpacks, putting their snacks in the baskets, where their water bottles went, everything they would need to do for the next 179 school days.  

At lunch time, Jenna and Kim went into the staff room, expecting to see the thinned spread of the morning’s goodies.  Instead, they were greeted by trays of various pastas and salad and garlic bread.

From a thankful parent.  Happy first day everyone!

“Wow, this is incredible.  They must have planned this for a bit, to get all of this for us,” Jenna sighed.

They loaded up plates full of food before sitting down at the large table in the middle of the staff room.  They talked about how their day was going with other teachers, Kim asking how her daughter was doing.  

She pulled out her phone.  No new messages from JC, but it wasn’t going to stop her from sending him a text.

On my lunch.  A parent bought us tons of food.  I wish it was Friday so I could bring some home.

I’m seeing you Friday night at the event, right?  I’m sure you don’t want to miss it if Lance is hosting…

We’re definitely on the list.  I’m excited to see it all firsthand.  I told him I don’t need VIP, I just wanna get in.

You’ll get VIP for sure, I know Lance.  If not, I’ll ensure that it happens.  You’re one of us now, so get used to it.

Does “one of us” status get me cheap tickets to see Justin? When he finally releases that album he’s been teasing…

I think I can swing that. Still a Justin girl?

Til the day I die. My JC tendencies are hitting pretty hard tho.  I mean, he saved my life…

And look where it led me.

You poor man.  

Quite the opposite.  Have a good rest of your day, Jenna.

She put her phone away, Kim looking at her.  “Your ‘not boyfriend’ again?”

“Yeah.”

“Oooh, this sounds juicy,” one of the other teachers said. 

“I have seizures.  Not a lot, but sometimes, even with medication. I had one while I was driving home a couple weeks ago, and this guy behind me pulled over and called 911. He wanted to make sure I was ok, and since then we’ve become friends,” Jenna explained. 

“The way she looks when she’s texting him, it’s like she’s in love with him,” Kim laughed lightly. “I think it’s cute.”

“We’re just friends. He has a girlfriend, they’re great together.”

“We’ll see how long that lasts. Pulling for you,” the teacher said.

Jenna scrolled through her Instagram, her eyes bulging. “Justin released a new song! It’s on someone else’s album, but still…”

“One of THOSE, huh?” the teacher laughed. “Does she know?”

“Know what?” Jenna asked. 

“Nothing,” Kim said quickly. 

Jenna clicked the link, listening to the song. It was mid tempo, but sexy as hell, her new favorite song. Not that that meant much, she wasn’t too much into the current music scene, just playing playlists of music from high school and college years.

They talked a bit before lunch was over, Jenna excited by what the rest of the day would bring. 

…

“I’m so glad I get a Friday off for once,” Kelly said, putting on her makeup.  “We don’t have to worry about IF we’ll run into Lance or JC, we’ve already met them…”

“I wanna meet Michael.  He’s commented on things I’ve said on his lives, it would be nice to talk to him in person, face to face.”

“You are KILLING IT in that outfit.  Just saying. It’s a hot summer night, and that’s a hot summer outfit.”

Jenna was wearing a short black jumpsuit.  It had a halter style neck that tied around her neck, was backless except for strings that tied there, and the shorts stopped about mid thigh. It was covered with black sparkly fringe, almost like a 21st century flapper.  She opted for her hair down and a natural eye palette.  She wore her favorite pair of knee high boots to complete the outfit.

Kelly went bolder with a black mini dress with a deep v neck that laced up the front. She wore a bold red lip and killer black heels.

Jenna grabbed her phone. Are you coming to Rocco’s first? You wouldn’t dare miss a good drag show, would you?

Are you going? I’ll see if we can head over there before the main party.

You better come, I’m gonna sing! I was the QUEEN of karaoke before COVID.

I guess I’d better then. You better pick something good.

I have a list I go through. You’ll just have to come and find out. 

See you soon.

“You ready to party til dawn?” Kelly asked. 

“So ready,” Jenna smiled. 

They got in Kelly’s car, Jenna playing Justin’s new song a couple times, picking songs to amp them up for the night ahead. 

They parked a short walk away from Rocco’s, the small parking lot nearby being full. They walked in, the staff recognizing Jenna and getting them good seats.

“Looking FIERCE, ladies!” their server smiled.  “Any drinks?”

“Vodka cranberry,” Kelly said.

“Midori sour.  Light on the Midori, I’ve heard you get heavy handed with the alcohol…”

“All to help you have fun, darling…” the server replied. “Don’t worry, we know ALL about you, honey.  We’ll take care of you.”

“I’m ok if my drink is heavy on the vodka,” Kelly smiled. “Keep em coming.”

“I can’t drive, Kelly…”

“Ugh, fine.  Just the one, make it worth it.”

“You got it.  Anything to eat?”

“Zucchini sticks,” Jenna said softly. 

The night began, alternating between a drag queen performing and someone singing karaoke.  Some were better than others at karaoke, Jenna waiting for her turn. 

“Alright, Anya Knuts is coming to the stage, followed by our next karaoke singer, Jenna!”

Anya took the stage, wowing the crowd with her outfit and moves. Jenna was definitely getting pumped up for her turn, it had been too long since she’d sung for people. 

Anya finished her number, Jenna walking to take the mic. She took a deep breath as she stared at the people in the crowd. 

You can do this, she thought to herself.  Make JC proud.

The song started, Jenna getting a boost of energy from the cheers from the crowd before she sang a single note. She figured her outfit was getting attention, feeling a confidence she hadn’t had in a while. 

You got me some type of way

Ain’t used to feeling this way

I do not know what to say

But I know I shouldn't think about it

Took one fuckin' look at your face

Now I wanna know how you taste

Usually don't give it away 

But you know I'm out here thinkin' 'bout it

Just as she finished the first verse, she saw Jen walk in. She knew JC was there, he would see her any second. Jen had on an ivory off the shoulder top and black shorts with strappy sandals, looking effortlessly flawless.  

Then I realize she's right there

And I'm at home like, "Damn, this ain't fair"

Jen took a seat, watching Jenna.  She had no idea who Jenna was, beyond singing karaoke. The servers said hi to Jen, Lance coming out to give her a hug.

“Wow, Jenna can sing!” Lance smiled. 

“Jenna? As in the girl Josh saved?”

“Yeah. You should say hi when she’s finished.”

 

“Oh, I plan on it,” Jen said with a smirk.

Jenna continued the song, singing the chorus when she saw JC. His eyes widened, a smile spreading across his face as he saw her. He was wearing a white tee under his leather jacket, dark wash ripped jeans, and his rainbow checkered Vans. He was the definition of cool and casual.

This shit always happen to me 

Why can't we just play for keeps?

Practically on my knees 

But I know I shouldn't think about it

You know what you're doin' to me

You're singin' my songs in the streets, yeah, yeah

Actin' all innocent, please

When I know you out here thinkin' 'bout it

She made eye contact with JC as she went into the next pre chorus.

Then you realize she's right there 

And you're at home like, "Damn, she can't compare"

JC’s smile lessened as Jen walked up to him, almost like she was hurting him, grabbing his arm. He wrapped his arm around Jen, giving her a kiss, Jenna watching everything unfold before her.

She finished the song, the crowd cheering for her. She saw someone grab JC’s attention, Jenna walking back to her table.

“You think that’s funny?” Jenna heard someone say. Jenna looked up, seeing Jen in front of her.  “Pretty shitty song choice given I know you and JC…”

“Are just friends.  I’m a fan, sure, and I’m thankful he saved my life, but that’s it. I actually LIKE the two of you together. I think you’re great together and would never want to split you up. I picked the song because it was fun and had an *NSYNC song within it without having to pick an *NSYNC song to sing.  There’s nothing between JC and me.”

Kelly kept quiet, not wanting to provoke Jen further. The look on Jen’s face went from angry to regret, knowing she had overstepped.

“Hey,” JC said as he walked over. “Great song. Did I miss anything?”

“Jen and I were just getting acquainted,” Jenna said calmly.

“Great,” JC smiled.

They sat down with Jenna and Kelly, Jenna feeling very nervous and on edge. They began talking, but the women tried to not let the tension between them become noticeable.

Kelly decided to push Jen’s buttons a little.  “So, what have you been doing while JC is watching Friends with Jenna the last couple weeks?”

“Catching up on work stuff, watching TV.  I’m glad they’re able to hang out, being friends and all,” she lied, having no idea they’d been spending so much time together.

They soon moved across the street to Heart, Jenna excited to get to dance and cut loose. While she’d done karaoke, it had been years since she’d been to a proper club, even years before COVID.

Lance of course had to take photos with them all, JC wanting Jenna in some of the pictures.  They soon went up to the VIP area, Kelly getting Jenna another drink.

“Jen was such a bitch to you earlier, what the hell?  It’s like she didn’t know you were still hanging out…” Kelly said, watching JC and Jen dance together, Jen pulling JC into a heated kiss.  

Jenna watched, feeling torn between seeing him happy with Jen, but also wishing it was her.

They danced, when Jenna heard a familiar intro. “It’s the new Justin song with Romeo Santos!”

“Pretty sure it’s the other way around, but sure,” Kelly said.

Jenna felt something brush her arm. She turned to see JC in front of her.  “Dance with me? Just once?”

Jenna silently nodded, hoping no one would notice that he was dancing with her. She tried to not look at him, like she wasn’t having feelings stronger than a teenage fangirl crush.

“You look great,” he smiled, pulling her chin up to look into her eyes.  The world could have ended right then and there, one of the happiest moments of her life.  

His hands rested on her hips, admittedly a little firmer against her than he should have.  She didn’t care, no longer fighting his attention, enjoying that he was looking intently at her.  Under different circumstances, this would have been the point in a rom-com where they kiss on the dance floor.   She knew that wasn’t going to happen. She smiled, dancing with JC while listening to Justin, JC either unaware or indifferent to who was singing.

The song ended, Jenna not wanting to leave his arms.  She reluctantly pulled back, both of them joining their group for the night. Jenna was glad to be included in their circle, having felt on the outside even with her friends for so long.

“Jenna, officially meet Michael,” Lance said, walking up with Michael. 

“So YOU’RE the famous Jenna!”

“Guilty as charged.  It’s nice to meet you in person, I join your lives on Instagram when I can. You’ve responded to some of my comments before…”

“You sound like you’re as big a fan of me as you are of these guys…”

“I mean, kinda…” Jenna gushed.  “I wanted to get you guys something for the twins, but I had no idea how to get it to you.  I guess I don’t have that excuse anymore…”

“You better bring something good,” Michael joked.  

“Only Target’s finest…” Jenna laughed.

Jenna and Michael started talking as she noticed JC and Jen getting cozy.  That nervous ball in the pit of her stomach felt like it was getting bigger.

“You’re still in shock this is all happening, aren’t you?” Michael asked.

“Kinda, yeah.  I mean, I’ve had JC in my apartment, in my bed,” she let slip.

“Girl, spill…” he said, his eyes wide.

“The night of his birthday.  He was supposed to go with Jen to something, probably dinner with Eric, and he took off…”

“Yeah, I remember Lance being freaked out.  He called you, didn't he?”

“Lance did, yeah.  Justin was the one that found him, still not sure where.  He talked JC into talking to me about things, and he showed up to my apartment.  We talked for a bit, then watched some TV.  I fell asleep on the couch, so did he, then he said he’d stay with me until I fell asleep.  I woke up the next morning and JC was in my bed.  Well, ON my bed, he slept over the covers.”

“Ok, if it were me and Lance, and you were a guy, I’d never let Lance near you again.  How Jen is being so cool about this right now is beyond me.”

“Yeah.  I mean, I never meant for it to happen, I never meant for ANY of this to happen.  I had no idea the man that saved my life would be JC, and that I’d be spending hours watching TV with him the last couple Fridays.  It’s been less than a month since my accident and it’s just, I’m still adjusting to it all.  I’ve always been like ‘I love you and Jen together’ and stuff, making sure he’s telling her, so I guess she's ok with all of it.”

“You know he’s telling her?” Michael asked.

“Why would he keep it from her?  I saw him text her the first time, I can’t imagine why he’d keep this from her.  We’re just friends, we both have made that clear, as much as it hurt hearing him say it the way he did.  I have no intention of breaking them up, and I’m totally not his type anyway.”

“If a smoking hottie isn’t his type, then maybe he’s playing for the wrong team…”

“I’m not Jen, or Kathryn, or Eva.  He has a type, and I’m none of those things.  I’m taller, red hair, blue eyes.  Not at all what anyone would expect him to be into.”

“This again?” Kelly sighed, rolling her eyes.  “You are rocking this outfit and really gonna say you aren’t hot?”

“I’m not saying that, I’m just not JC’s idea of hot.  Not that I even want to be…”

“That’s a lie,” Kelly said, looking at Michael.  Michael had a smirk on his face.

“What’s that look for?  Michael, no…  Whatever you’re thinking, just… no.”

“You like him,” Michael nudged. 

“Shut up, he’ll hear you!”

“It’s a loud nightclub, he won’t hear me…”

“It doesn’t matter. I’m not his type, he doesn’t see me that way.  Drop it. I’m not gonna get my hopes up and then be heartbroken when nothing happens. I mean, I’m sure he and Jen won’t get married, that’s not his thing, but it’s not like there’s trouble in paradise.  Not the way they look at each other.”  She turned to look at him, kissing Jen deeply as he held her against him.  “There’s no way they’d do that in public if anything was wrong.”

“You’re kidding, right? You pretend in front of people.  Has he said anything to Lance about any problems?” Kelly asked Michael.

“No, they’re great…”

“Not helping, Michael,” Kelly huffed. 

“Just being honest.  Enjoy the rest of your night, we’ll hang out throughout the night, I promise.”

The girls danced the night away, the bar announcing the last call.  They sat in a private area with JC, Jen, Lance, and Michael.  Softer music was playing as the club had cleared, just them and staff cleaning up to fully close the club.

“I’ve never stayed at a club after last call,” Jenna said.  “Karaoke was different, and I was at a pub when it closed, but I always had to leave, never getting to stay like this.”

Jen got up to go to the bathroom, the group still talking. The song changed, no one really noticed. 

“JC,” Michael started, “Dance with Jenna.  Then we can all go home.”

“Shall we?” JC asked, looking at Jenna.  He stood, pulling her up from her seat and a couple steps away from their table. He held her close, the smell of his cologne filling her senses. He was warm, inviting, and safe.

In that moment, he tilted her chin up, looking into her eyes.  She couldn’t help but hear the lyrics of the song, wishing for them to come true.

And I want to walk with you

On a cloudy day

In fields where the yellow grass grows knee-high

So won't you try to come

Come away with me and we'll kiss

On a mountaintop

Come away with me

And I'll never stop loving you

And I want to wake up with the rain

Falling on a tin roof

While I'm safe there in your arms

So all I ask is for you

To come away with me in the night

Come away with me

No one had looked at her the way JC was.  There was such a softness to him, his eyes bright but soft. If she didn’t know any better, she’d think he was in love with her.  She’d been wrong before. THIS was the moment where the rom-com couple would kiss.  A quiet, perfect moment.

 

And Jen saw all of it as she stepped out of the bathroom and back to their table.  Her heart broke and anger bubbled inside her.

The drive home was surprisingly quiet for JC and Jen, not that JC minded. It had been a long day, he wanted to get home and go to bed. They hadn’t planned on staying that long, but he wanted to stay as long as Jenna was there, keeping an eye on her.

He’d been caught off guard by what she’d worn for the night, pleasantly surprised. Jenna didn’t seem confident all the time, and tonight she shone bright.  There was a light in her he hadn’t seen before, but it suited her well.

He pulled the Jeep up to the house, letting Jen into the house before he closed the door behind him.

“Did you have fun tonight?” Jen asked.

“Yeah. It’s fun to see Lance and Michael, get out, dance with you, have some fun. I’m sure pictures will be everywhere tomorrow if they aren’t already…”

“Jenna wasn’t what I pictured,” Jen admitted. “I’m glad I got to meet her.”

“Did you have fun tonight?” JC wondered. 

“I did.  But for now, I want you to make me feel beautiful, needed.”

“Yeah?” he asked with a grin.

“Make love to me, Josh.  Like it’s the last time you’ll see me…”

…

JC tenderly kissed her lips.  “I love you, Jen.”

Jen looked him right in the eyes.  “I’m breaking up with you.”

JC’s jaw dropped.  “We just had sex, and you’re breaking up with me?!  What’s going on?  Is there someone else?  Oh god, there’s someone else…” he began to panic.

“There is, but it’s not me.  You’re in love with Jenna.”

“Jen, no, that’s not what this is…  She likes us together.  I like us together…”

“She could’ve picked a better song to sing at karaoke.  The timing of it all was too coincidental.”

“You know Ari sampled us on that song, I sang part of it at Coachella when we first came on.”

“That’s what she said. She tried to say it’s a song she’s done before and I’m reading too much into it.”

“You’re making a mountain out of a molehill.”

“I also saw how comfortable you looked with her dancing out on the floor tonight, then I saw the moment you two had after everything closed down.  You haven’t looked at me like that in a long time, Josh…”

“I love you, Jen, and we just had sex.  What do you mean?”

“You need to explore your feelings for Jenna.  I’m gonna grab my stuff this weekend, give you some space.  If you really mean that you don’t have feelings for her, then we’ll pick up where we left off.  If I don’t hear from you, at least I have one hell of a goodbye memory.”

“Jen, stop.  You’re not thinking.”

“You hid seeing her from me.  Why?”

JC sighed.  “I knew how you felt after I hurt her feelings.  You wanted me to be done with it, to be done with her.  I couldn’t.  She had another seizure, because of me, what I said.  Even if nothing had happened to her, I would’ve still wanted to see her.  But I knew I had to see her again, even if she was asleep, which she was.  I knew her situation wasn’t the greatest, so I did what I could to help her.  I’m paying whatever her insurance won’t cover, though now that she’s working that might change a bit.  I knew you wouldn’t be ok with any of that for a random person I came upon.”

“Wrong, Josh.  You’re an incredibly kind and generous person.  If you had told me, I would have understood.  But instead you hid it, and are refusing to see that you have feelings for her.”

“I admit, I’ve been feeling in a rut, but that’s just in general, not with us.  I mean, we do what we can to change things up, but I guess I was feeling in a rut with us.  That wasn’t the only thing bothering me though.  That’s why I took off on my birthday, I was in a rut and not really wanting to celebrate my birthday.  Justin found me, and told me I needed to talk to Jenna.  I went over, we watched TV, and we fell asleep on her couch, then I took her to bed…”

“I don’t need to know, Josh.”

“No, you do.  I laid on her bed until she fell asleep, falling asleep myself in the process. Nothing sexual happened. I didn’t even wake up turned on.  It’s not that she means nothing to me, but you’ve been my world for so long…”

“As the world turns, so they say,” she sighed. “All I know is that you hid seeing her, paying for her care, and I saw the way you looked at each other. There’s something there, whether either of you want it or not.  Explore your feelings for her, and I hope you’ll come back to me.”

“Jen, don’t leave. You don’t have to do this. You know I love you.”

“You’ve been pulling away from me, JC, admit it.”

“You never call me JC.”

“I am now,” she sighed. 

“What about Bronson?” JC asked. 

“If you want him, keep him.”

“Jen, you don’t…”

“Yes, I do. You need to see if there’s still anything there between us.”

“We just had sex, that didn’t prove anything?”

“If I were to have done this before having sex, would you be able to?”

“I’d probably try even harder,” JC answered honestly.  “I can’t lose you.”

“The fact that you’d try harder to not lose me speaks volumes compared to trying harder just because you love me.”

“Jen…”

Jen got up from the bed, pulling her clothes back on, pulling clothes out of a drawer and grabbing a suitcase from the closet. He watched her, unable to move.  His mind told him to move, but his body had given up. He knew if he tried to stop her, it would make things worse.

She walked to the bedroom door, turning to look at him. “Goodbye, JC.  I hope you call me, but best of luck if you don’t.”

He sat there, naked and surprised by what had unfolded just then. He felt like things were crashing down around him. He slowly got up, pulling on his underwear and jeans, grabbing his phone. 

Please be awake, he pleaded as he began the call. It rang three times before it picked up. 

“C, do you have ANY idea what time it is?!”

“Jen just left me.”

“Left you?”

“Left me. Packed up her clothes and left, Justin.”

“Fuck.  Ummm, lemme get dressed and I’ll be right over.  You gonna call Lance?”

“I was with him all night, I’m sure he’s tired. I’m exhausted, but my brain won’t shut off…”

“I’ll be there as soon as I can. If you need to drink, wait for me. Pour one for me and we’ll start together.  I got you, C.”

“I know, T.  Thanks.”

JC put on a shirt, walking slowly through the house.  He noticed certain things were missing, Jen grabbing them on her way out. It wasn’t everything, not even all her clothes, but enough that he noticed she meant business.  The best he could hope for in the morning was being so drunk he’d sleep like the dead for the next 12 hours. He then realized that meant waking up to even more of her things gone, his guts churning at the thought. 

He made his way to his liquor cabinet, grabbing his bottles of scotch and whiskey. He’d need plenty of both to get him through talking this over. He got two glasses, eyeing them, figuring out whether to pace himself or just fuck it and pour a full glass. He opted for the latter. He was starting to pour the second glass when he heard Justin walk into the room. 

“Starting with whiskey, huh? It’s gonna be a long night,” Justin sighed. 

JC looked at his watch. “Fuck, it’s 4am. I didn’t wake you, did I?”

“No, you’re fine.”

“Did I interrupt… anything?”

“I wouldn’t have answered my phone, C.  We’re good. I brought something just in case,” Justin said, pulling out a bottle of tequila.  He grabbed two shot glasses, pouring one for each of them. 

JC took the shot glass, looking at Justin. “Not sure what we could toast to…”

“To friendship. Next year will be 30 years since we met, C.  Not a lot of people have friends like that, not that are as strong as this.”

“To friendship,” JC said, clinking glasses before knocking back the shot.

Justin took the large glass of whiskey, JC grabbing his, along with the bottle, and sitting down on the couch. 

Justin tipped his whiskey towards JC.  “To your health, happy belated birthday.”  Justin took a sip, watching JC drain his glass in one go. “Oh, ok… that kinda night. Well, I mean, if she left… that makes sense. What did she say? Is there someone else?”

“Yeah, Jenna,” JC sighed. 

“Jen dumped you for Jenna? Did NOT see that coming…”

“No, Jen thinks I’m in love with her.  Told me I need to figure things out.”

“What made her think that?”

“Well, hiding the fact that I saw her the night of my birthday, fell asleep on her couch, then laid next to her on her bed.  I’m paying any medical bills, we’ve been having pizza and binge watching Friends… Then there’s her job.”

“How did she find out?”

“We were at Rocco’s and Heart with Jenna and her best friend, and it came up in conversation. I didn’t tell Jenna I was hiding things from Jen, so she figured it was common knowledge. She sang that Ariana song where she sampled It Makes Me Ill, she was in this sexy short jumpsuit thing covered with fringe.  Jenna had a confidence I'd never seen before.  Then we got over to Heart, I asked her to dance, right as they started playing that new song you’re on, great job by the way.  It felt good dancing with her, she looked and smelled incredible, there was a light in her eyes… Then after the bar closed, we sat at a table, and Michael told me I should slow dance with her. I held her close, and there was this moment.  I didn’t want to let her go.”

“C, sounds like you love her to me… more than that.”

“What?”

“I couldn’t help but notice you’re… well…”

“What?”

“How do I say this gently? You’re hard as fuck, C, I can see it in your jeans.  You love her, you wanna bang her.  Were you like this at the club?”

“Yeah, but I was dancing with Jen, kissing…”

“She was trying to show Jenna you’re hers.”

“She left me, Justin.”

“I agree with Jen.  You love her, and you need to explore things.”

“I don’t, I love Jen. I always will. I don’t feel that way towards Jenna.”

“You’re paying her medical bills, you hid seeing her from Jen… You used ME to get her a job at Silas’s school.  You’re either in love with her, or have blown brain cells and are going crazy over a random stranger…”

“I just want her to be taken care of.  I couldn’t handle the guilt knowing I’d caused her second seizure, I need to make sure she’ll be ok. “

“It’s like you’re obsessed with her, C.”

“I’m not.  I only see her once a week.”

“Do you text every day?”

“Not much, she’s busy with work.”

“JC, just admit you’re in love with her and get it over with already!”

“I’m not in love with her.  I broke her heart once telling her that, I can’t imagine doing that again.”

“You care how she feels.  Sounds like love to me.”

“It’s called being a friend, not an asshole.”

“Well, I’m done talking.  This was short and I’m ready to go home.”

“Justin, I can’t be here when Jen comes back for her stuff.”

“I had just the shot and a couple sips of whiskey.  I’m taking this in a different cup so I’m not just dumping it.  I know you brought out the good shit, I have more respect for my liquor than that.  Come stay at my place tonight, take one of the guest rooms.  Are you gonna tell Jenna?”

“No, cuz there’s nothing there.  Well, not NOTHING, but I’m just protective of her right now.  She’d think it’s her fault.”

“Because it IS, cuz you looooove her…”

“I’m gonna smack the shit out of you once I get to your house.”

“Maybe I deserve it, but there’s bound to be more to this.  I’m gonna have Lance and Michael come over tomorrow, we’ll hash this out with people that were there.  Jess would love to see the twins.”

“So she’s gonna have 4 kids by herself while we all talk?  That sounds fair…” JC said sarcastically.

“Silas is capable of helping.  He’s really good with Phin, it’ll be fine.  If she needs me she can grab me so you can chat with Lance and Michael.  Grab a change of clothes and let’s get back to my place, I’m exhausted.”

 

JC went back upstairs, trying not to think about everything being gone once he came back, that Jen was really gone.  He hoped in a week’s time or so, she’d be back in the house and things would go back to normal.

“Not that I’m ungrateful for the invitation, Justin, but why are we here?” Lance wondered.

“Consider this an intervention,” Justin said.

“Wait, for who?” Michael asked.

JC quietly raised his hand, having his head face down on the table, his other arm cushioning his head.  “I may be hung over, but I can still hear you…”

“He had a lot to drink this morning…” Justin recalled.

“He was fine last night,” Michael said.

“Until he got home.  You gonna tell them, or should I?”

“I should, but I’m too busy keeping my head from exploding.  I’m feeling every one of my 46 years… Fuck, how does Chris do this?!”

Justin looked at Lance and Michael as he sat next to JC.  “Jen left him last night.  Banged him then went on her way, packed a bag and everything.  She’s probably there now packing up everything else.”

“I get to keep Bronson…” JC said, trying to be positive.

“What the fuck happened?  You guys were so happy last night,” Lance wondered.

“No…” Michael gasped.

“What?” Justin and Lance asked.

“Is this because of Jenna?”

JC gave a thumbs up.  “We have a winner…”

“She thinks he’s in love with her.  Told him to sort out his feelings,” Justin replied. 

“I love Jen!” he groaned.  “Why can’t I keep a woman?!”

“You know she’s right, don’t you?” Michael replied.  “You totally are.”  He left out the part where Jenna is just as in love with him.  If this was going to happen, they needed to figure it out themselves instead of doing it because other people told them to.  He loved drama, but this was different.

“We’re.  Just.  Friends… Why is that hard to understand?!  Oww, the sound of my own voice hurts…”

“Jesus, how much did you drink?” Lance asked.

“We had a shot of tequila and he chugged a full glass of whiskey, then by the looks of it, drank half my liquor cabinet…”

“Did not.  Maybe an eighth… FEELS like half though…”

“You’re replacing the bottle you emptied,” Justin said, JC giving him a thumbs up, not looking up.

“You danced with her twice, both were kinda big moments…” Michael said.  “I saw how you looked at each other.”

“She just has a celebrity crush on me.  It’ll fade once she knows the real me.”

“And she gets to know the caring guy that’s been taking care of her for the last month… the horror, how will she ever find you attractive?” Lance laughed.

“Not my problem.  I want Jen…”

“Uh.  You want Jen-UH…”

JC gave the middle finger.  “I want my life back.  Can I redo last night?”

“You’re saying you wouldn’t do the same things again?”

“You made me dance with her after things closed down.”

“I didn't MAKE you do anything.  I just put a suggestion out there.”

“We danced to Norah Jones, you asshole.  You knew what you were doing.”

“Just giving you a nudge.  I didn’t realize Jen would react like that.”

“Nudging me into another woman’s arms in front of my girlfriend?  You’re sadistic.”

“You’re taller, I nudged her into YOUR arms,” Michael corrected.

“Why?  For fun?”

“She’d had such a great night, a great week at work, I wanted it to end on a high note.”

“Well, for me it ended terribly.”

“Did it?” Justin asked.

“Yes!” he shouted, pounding his fist. “I love Jen, this was never the plan.”

“What WAS the plan?” Lance asked. 

“I just wanted to make sure she was ok. That was it.”

“Then what happened that things went deeper?”

JC was quiet for a moment, collecting his thoughts.  “I saw her. I talked to her, however briefly. I knew I needed to make this more than her not dying, getting to the hospital ok.  I heard her story, the stress she was under.  I wanted to help her.”

“You wanted to be the hero, there’s no shame in that. But why bring her to Rocco’s?”

“I wanted to get to know her.  I learned so much about her in a short time frame. In spite of the shit she’s been through, she has this amazing aura about her. She’s been hurt, not always the confident woman I saw last night, but I want to bring that out more. I loved seeing that side of her, I love her…”

“What did you just say?” Michael nearly choked. 

“I loved that side of her, I want her to feel that way all the time.”

“After that. You said you love her,” Justin said.

JC paused. “Fuck, what do I do?”

“You pray that she feels the same way. That this isn’t some celebrity crush, that it’s real.”

“And if it’s not?” JC sighed.

“You go back to Jen, everything the way it’s always been.”

“I don’t want that.  I want Jenna,” he said, sitting up. “I need time, but she’s who I want, if she feels the same way.”

…

“I’ll be home late tonight, it’s back to school night. Might as well just stay here since by the time I get home on the bus, I’d need to come back to school.”

“Are you nervous?” Kelly asked. 

“Not really. I’ve done these before, though, thankfully I have Kim to help with any questions I don’t have answers to.  She’s picking up food for us in a bit, gotta clean up the room a bit, make sure it’s perfect for tonight.”

“Let me know if you need me to pick you up or if Kim is giving you a ride home, ok? Pulling a JC and making sure you’re ok…”

“I’ll be fine. Is it bad that night feels like a dream?  I danced with him, twice…”

“I could see you and Michael becoming besties.  Maybe you’ll get to meet the twins, feed your biological clock a bit…”

“I’m 39, pretty sure that ship has sailed…”

“That’s why you need to see the twins, feed your body a little bit if only to satisfy those motherly urges but not have to actually have one…”

“We’ll see. I gotta go, see you at home.”

Jenna put her phone on her charger, trying to figure out what needed to be done. 

“What happened that feels like a dream?  You danced with someone?  Did you meet a new guy?” Kim asked. 

“No, no new guy,” Jenna sighed . 

“Don’t tell me you danced with your hunky hero…”

Jenna nodded, a blush rising to her cheeks.

“Do you have pictures?!”

“I got to see JC and Lance, I went to Lance’s new club…”

“Did you plan on meeting your hero at the club?”

“Yeah.  It was incredible.  Like a sexier version of Cinderella, but no glass slipper.”  She grabbed her phone, showing the pictures they’d taken together that night, glad she was none the wiser about just who her hero was.

“I’d take pictures with these guys over ones with your hero any day,” Kim said.  “I mean, you look like you’re one of them in this picture.  And that outfit…”

“They’re really nice, down to earth, they made me feel like I was part of their group.  It was a fun night, for sure.”

“How did things go with your hero?”

“I danced with him twice, one fast and one slow as they were closing the bar.  I won’t lie, it felt nice to be in his arms.”

“You totally like him.”

“He’s got a girlfriend.  I saw them making out a lot that night.”

“Wait, he brought her and danced with you?”

“I’ve come to accept that I”m a pity project.  Yeah, he wants to be friends, but that’s all we’ll ever be.  She’s gorgeous and I’m not his type.  I’ll take what I can get, he’s been really nice to me and a level of friendship I haven’t had for a while.”

“You aren’t wanting more?”

“I am, but I know I’ll never get it.  I’ve seen the way he looks at her.  As much as I wish, he’ll never look at me like that.  I’m used to it by now.”

“Jenna, we gotta find you the right guy.  You know, that’s actually single…”

“Let’s focus on the classroom and tonight before I cry,” Jenna requested.  They cleaned the desks from an art project they’d done that day, making sure the desks were just so, everything in its place.  

Kim quickly grabbed dinner from somewhere nearby, both of them eating as quickly as possible before the parents came.

The room filled with parents, some greeting Kim as they knew her from their older children at the school, making conversation with Jenna before things started.  Once all the parents were seated, they began their presentation of what their child would be learning that year.  They reviewed the curriculum, going over field trips, specialty classes they offered during the school week like music, PE, and foreign language.  They discussed the extra curricular activities for after school, touching on everything they would need to know for the year.

Jenna had been confident in what she was presenting, not needing to deflect to Kim on any questions.  The night was soon over, parents leaving to go home.  The room was empty when she heard a knock on the open door.  “Kim?” a familiar voice asked.

Jenna looked up and about jumped out of her skin.  She tried to keep calm, but seeing him… in her classroom…

“Hi, Justin,” Kim smiled.

Jenna looked at Kim.  “You knew about my fandom and didn't tell me you’re on a first name basis with Justin Timberlake?!”

“You partied with JC and Lance last Friday, so…” Kim began, shurgging innocently..  “Silas was in my class when he was in Kindergarten.”

“You’re Jenna, right?  Heard a lot about you…” Justin smirked.

Jenna’s face began to turn a deep red.  “I’m sure.  Kim, can you excuse us?”

“Sure,” Kim said, leaving the room.

“Did you come to see Kim, or me?” Jenna wondered.

“You.  JC won’t stop talking about you.”

“Yeah, well, the feeling’s mutual.  Too bad he’s got Jen.  Yeah right, like I ever stood a chance even if he WAS single…  He’s done a lot for me lately, I don’t know if he told you.”

“He’s done more than you realize.  You’re welcome, by the way.”

“For what?”

“The lunch on the first day of school, that was from me.  Mainly to try and make sure you got it.  I’m the thankful parent.  And, well, there’s something else.  Not sure JC wants you to know…”

“What?”

“I helped get you this job.  He asked if I knew if they needed a teacher.  I reached out and luckily they did.”

“I knew it seemed fishy that a school I never applied to somehow got my resume…  So he got me this job, too?  Since he knew I couldn’t get one on my own…”  She was torn between thinking it was sweet for him to at least try, but sad that she couldn’t do it on her own.

“We got you the interview.  YOU got yourself the job.  There was no quid pro quo situation.  I recommended you be interviewed, but they made it clear that they wouldn’t hire you if you weren’t a good fit.  I’m glad it worked out.  Kim’s great, you’ll love working with her.  Silas really liked her.”

“Doesn’t your nanny come to stuff like this for you?”

“Usually, yeah.  But knowing that you were working here now, I had to say hi.”

“I gotta admit, it’s taking everything I have to stay calm right now.”

“Kim said you partied with JC and Lance, which I know about, by the way.  I heard all about Friday,” Justin said, his voice shifting a bit.

“If I’m being honest, you were my favorite, still are.  I mean, I’ve met all of you except Chris at this point, though I’m gonna try and meet him at his Pop2000 show in October up north.  I really made the group chat?”

“Oh honey, absolutely.  I can introduce you to Chris now, just FaceTime him…”

“I can wait.  You’re the first one I interacted with.  You grabbed my hand during one of your LA shows for Man of The Woods.”

“Guess you freaked out a bit once you knew JC had saved you?”

“Yeah.  Though I’m also not surprised, the more I get to know him.  Anyone else might have left me to die, but JC, well, he always does the right thing.”

“He tries to, for sure.  That day changed both of you, that’s for sure.”

“So you came to meet the woman JC saved?  Is that it?”

More like meet the woman JC is completely in love with, Justin thought.  “Yeah.”

“I should get going, I have a bus to catch…” 

“Let me take you home,” Justin offered.

“Justin, I can’t…”

“Enough.  I insist.  Would you tell JC no, or Lance?”

“No, I suppose not.  Just feeling like a charity case at times.”

“Definitely not.  If Lance likes you enough to have you be part of their entourage, that’s good enough for me.”

“JC’s opinion doesn’t matter?” Jenna giggled.

“It definitely does, but he’s biased, saving your life and all.  I was glad to help you get the job, do my part to help you.  But not out of pity.  If you’d become friends with any of them, and needed this, I’d still have done it.  We’re all team Jenna,” he said, meaning it in more ways than one.

Jenna pulled out her phone, texting Kelly. Getting a ride home. She looked up at Justin. “Any way you’d wanna come up to my apartment?” she asked with a smile. 

“Surprise your roommate?” he replied. 

She nodded silently, Justin chuckling. “Has she met JC and Lance?”

“Yeah. We were at Rocco’s when she pieced together JC was my ‘hero’.  Then went with me last weekend.”

 

“Hey, you don’t need to use quotes around the word hero with JC. I’ll openly admit he was one of mine for a lot of things, especially my teen years.  Let’s get to my car and I’ll meet your roommate.”

They got to Justin’s car, Jenna trying to contain her excitement at being so close to her teenage heartthrob, the one she’d dreamed of marrying back when she was 17 and 18.  This wasn’t the same man, though still the apple of her eye.  She gave him the address, Justin putting it into his GPS.  

“How long have you wanted to be a teacher?” he asked, making small talk.

“Since I was about 13.  I’ve worked all kinds of jobs to work with kids while I was in high school and college.”

“You from around here?”

“Born and raised.  We don’t have to talk if it’s too awkward, Justin.”

“Not awkward.  I want to get to know you.  JC and Lance already do, I want a head start on Joey and Chris.”

“Is it always a competition between them?” she laughed.

“No, but I definitely have the advantage, you being in my car.”

“What made you choose to put Silas in our school?  Surely you had lots of choices.”

“In our research, which jess took to a whole other level after preschool, we saw it was the best.  Not just based on scores that probably mean nothing because you either rave about something or bitch about it, no middle ground.  We knew that stuff was important, but we asked friends who had kids in school around here, and getting their recommendation helped.  We had him do a shadow day, sit in on a day in the classroom.  I don’t know if it was his personality or the classroom, but he felt so welcome and comfortable, already started to make friends…”

“Well, he IS a Timberlake, that’s for sure.”

“It felt right.  Not just good stats, but good staff and environment to back up the stats.  It could have been the best reviewed place in the world, but if he wasn’t feeling it, we wouldn’t have either.  How is it as a teacher?  There’s always two sides to any business.  The customers, that felt weird to say as a parent, and those doing the work.”

“It’s great.  I mean, it’s like most schools, there are meetings that should have just been emails, but I feel like most businesses have some form of that.  It’s still new, but the staff have been inviting and welcoming. I love having Kim as my co teacher.  The fact that she let me make our room an *NSYNC themed room…”

“Looked like it was star themed, to me,” Justin interrupted.

“It is, but with *NSYNC in mind.  I guess you didn't look around to see song lyrics and things posted around the room.  JC kinda liked it.  Probably thought it was cheesy and weird, but he didn't complain.”

“I was more focused on you, for sure.  Trust me, cheesy and weird is right up his alley, so you’re fine.  He gets it, we all do.  The fact there are still people out there buying the merch we keep putting out…”

“Cuz it’s the only thing we get that we know all 5 of you have talked about.  It’s the closest thing we feel we’ll get to a reunion.  Thank you, by the way.”

“For the merch?”

“For being the fall guy on why there’s no reunion.  So many people still blame you and your career, your ego.  I know you’d be open to the possibility of a reunion, I could tell in how you answered Lance’s question when you were on his podcast back in 2020.  It was nice to hear you talk about the past with fond memories, not like it was something you were trying to repress.”

“I’m more used to being dragged for things, as much as I hate it all the same.  Most of the time it just rolls right off my back now.  I try not to look at anything that has my name in it if it’s something in the press.  Doesn’t matter what I’m doing.  If I’m doing nothing, they do it because they’re bored.  If I have a project I’m working on, I’m focusing on my career instead of getting the band back together.  It’s the same old same old, but it really is getting old.  I understand why people keep asking, keeping throwing my name out there, but still…”

“No pun intended, but you don’t have to justify yourself to me.  Fans that really know you pick up on the little things.  The tone in the interview you had with Lance, that was genuine.  Your little references to *NSYNC over the years, especially the subtle ones in your music or tours, like the mic stand…”

“Wasn’t sure people would know that, actually,” Justin said, eyebrows raised in gentle surprise.  I’ve known you for all of 20 minutes, Jenna, and I can see why JC…”  He cut himself off before giving too much away.

“Why JC what?”

“Why JC likes you.  You’re not like most fans, not how he sees them.  You’re open and vulnerable, not trying to put on this perfect front of ‘I’m your biggest fan’.  You’re easy to talk to.”

“I feel like it’s more the other way around.  I was practically shaking when I saw you in my classroom.  I’d always wondered when I’d interact with you again, but nothing ever like this popped into my head…”

“Again?  We’ve met before?”

“I was wearing a black one shoulder lacy top and a purple knee length skirt.  My hair was pulled back.  You grabbed my hand during Higher Higher, and I’ll never forget it.”  She was thankful it was dark, that he couldn’t see the red coming to her cheeks.

“Well, hopefully we can add more to that now.  Since you’re apparently part of our ‘group’ as it were now.  I mean, you’ve partied with JC and Lance, so you’ve met Michael…”

“It’s everything younger me dreamed of, and more.”

“Yeah?  What did you dream of back then?”

“Well, you’re my favorite, so a lot of it was about you.  Not sure you wanna hear that.  Part of my plan included opening for you guys on your next tour.”

“Ok, I may not be the best at math, but if you’re 35, wouldn’t you have been like 15 in 2002?”

“I wasn’t honest about my age.  I’m 39, not 35.  My plan was to be the next Britney and steal you away from her.  That was in 2001, so I had no idea how easy that could have been by the timeline I had set out.”

“Nothing would’ve happened.  At least nothing like you’d imagined.  Depending on when we met, it might’ve been a one thing and moved on, or been too close to everything and not happened at all.  Not exactly the romantic fairy tale you’d probably envisioned.”

“Definitely not.  Now, I…”  Her voice trailed off, not even wanting to express her feelings for JC.

“You like him, don’t you?” Justin asked softly.

“He’s a great guy, I don’t think anyone would deny that.”

“That’s not what I meant and you know it.  Where do I park?” Justin asked, seeing he was close to her apartment.  Jenna pointed to the metered parking, Justin thankful someone had just pulled out of a spot.  

They got out of the car, Jenna getting them into the building. They got into the elevator, Justin glad no one else was there.

“You like him,” he pressed.

“Doesn’t matter,” she replied, not looking at him. “He has Jen.”

“What if he didn’t?”

“He does, so I’m not entertaining that thought.”

“Jenna…”

“Ok, IF that were the case, I’m not his type.  I’m not like any of the women he’s been linked to, ever.”

“Kinda close to Bobbie,” Justin chuckled. 

“Still no.  We’re just friends, he’s made that clear.  I’m not his type, there’s nothing there beyond friends, a fan and one of her idols.”

“Ok, what if I was single?” Justin asked, hoping to lighten the mood.

“You’re not. If you were, you’d have hit on me already instead of asking me about JC.  Again, I doubt I’m your type, I’m not any kind of celebrity or attached to the entertainment business in any way.”

“Wrong on a couple counts, but this isn’t about me.”

“Why are you pushing this so hard?” Jenna asked, the elevator doors opening.

“Forget it,” he sighed.  They walked down the hall to her apartment, Jenna signaling him to wait just outside. 

“You decent?” Jenna asked as she opened the door.

“Am I dressed? Yes.  Are we talking personality? Hopefully also yes…” Kelly laughed from the couch. 

“Good, cuz I brought something home…”

“We can’t have animals,” Kelly said, turning to look at Jenna. Her eyes widened at the sight of the front door.  “Please tell me that’s a lookalike…”

“Nope, the real deal,” Justin said.

“Jenna, give me a heads up with this kinda thing! Could have told me JUSTIN was bringing you home.  I’m in my PJs on the couch for god’s sake!”

“This is more fun,” Jenna smiled. “Justin, you are welcome to stay and talk with Kelly.  You both seem to think there’s something between me and JC, you can entertain that fantasy land together.”

“You really brought me up here and then are leaving me here?” Justin teased.

“We surprised her. Whatever happens next is up to you.  Feel free to go home now that she has an embarrassing story of her first time meeting you…”

Jenna’s door clicked closed. Justin looked at Kelly.  “She’s stubborn…”

“You have no idea.”

“Can I tell you a secret?  Though I don’t know if it’s really much of a secret…”

“What?”

“You can’t tell Jenna. She won’t believe it anyway, apparently.”

“What, Justin?”

“Jen left. That night after the thing at Heart,” Justin whispered.

“No…” Kelly gasped.

Justin nodded. “Told him to figure out his feelings for Jenna.  At first he was all ‘I love Jen’, then he started talking about Jenna and it clicked. There was also a lot of alcohol involved, but he was hungover at that point.  But yeah, he’s single and has romantic feelings for her.”

“She’ll never believe it unless it comes from him. Even then, she might not believe it.  He’d have to kiss her before she finally believed it.”

“Well, I hope she realizes how she feels. He’s afraid of getting hurt if it’s nothing more than a celebrity fangirl crush.”

“I think she has her walls up to protect her if he didn’t like her that way.  Yeah, we don’t tell her. It has to be between the two of them.  This isn’t middle or high school anymore, where your friends push you together.  I just hope they can get over the awkwardness of that vulnerability.”

“That’s 4 on team Jenna and JC.  I’m gonna go, but it was nice to meet you and get a little more information.”

“Sorry I wasn’t more presentable,” Kelly sighed. 

“It’s your home, you do you.  Have a good night, Kelly.”

“Goodnight, Justin. Team Jenna and JC…”

He smiled. “Team Jenna and JC.”

 

“Why am I so nervous?” Jenna asked.  “It’s just pizza and TV night…”

“Because you like him,” Kim said as their class was packing up.  

“Kim, we’ve been over this…”

“You don’t talk about any other guy but Josh.  I’m just glad I finally got a name out of you.  I still have yet to even see a picture of the guy.”

“I’m glad we’re not on dismissal duty this week.  I can go meet him and not worry about him being seen.”

“Why can’t we see him?  Not even me?”

“It’s… complicated.”

“Try me,” Kim said.

“It’s JC, from *NSYNC.”

“I’m sorry I didn't tell you about Justin a couple days ago, but to say that to get me to drop it…”

Jenna wanted to defend herself, but she also wanted to drop it if Kim didn’t believe her.

Jenna’s phone buzzed. I’m here.  See you soon?

Yeah.  I’m gonna walk my class out and then I’ll head over.

Their class finished packing up, beating their timer.  “You know what that means,” Jenna smiled.

“DANCE PARTY!” the kids yelled.  They put their backpacks down and went to the large carpet.  Jenna pulled out her phone and played Pop and Bye Bye Bye.  The class then got their things and lined up, Kim leading them outside.  Jenna took up the rear, walking out the gate with her things once her class was in place for dismissal.

She walked down the street, seeing the overflow of parents' cars coming to pick up.  She wasn’t paying attention, walking towards their designated meeting spot.  She heard a honk, turning her head to see JC’s Jeep in line.

“I’m here to pick up from the school,” he smiled.

“You’re lucky you’re still on the street, that no one can see you,” Jenna said, getting in the car.

“I don’t know why you’re so bothered by us being seen together…”

“Because you have a girlfriend!  I don’t want pictures up everywhere that I split you guys up, the fandom would hate me.  People love you and Jen together, myself included.  I admit she wasn’t super nice to me last week, but…”

“She was definitely not in the best headspace that night,” JC sighed, remembering what happened in crystal clear detail, almost reliving it every day when he’d look at a part of his home where something of hers had been, seeing the space empty.  

“Is everything ok?”  Jenna wondered.

“She’ll be fine. She was admittedly intimidated by you, I think.  I made it clear to her how I felt.”  He might have shifted who his feelings were for, but he knew in his car was not the time or place for that discussion.  It had only been a week since the breakup, he wasn’t ready to be with anyone else, even if it was the woman he was crazy about.  His relationship with Jen needed some respect, she’d been the love of his life, or so he thought.  To jump right into something so soon felt like it had all meant nothing.  

“Intimidated by ME?  She knows who she is, who she’s dating, right?  I doubt I’d look half as glamorous as she does in those fancy dresses, she makes it all look so effortless…”

“Trust me, a lot goes into all of that, even for me.”

“Well, even with a team of professionals, I couldn’t pull that shit off.  Once they leave, at the event, I’d be a hot mess express.”

“I doubt that.  You looked great last week, super confident, like you were the woman you want to be and never get to be.  Between you singing at karaoke, to dancing and having fun, like you really just relaxed into who you really are, not hiding anything from the world.”

“I’d say it was the alcohol, but I only had one drink the whole night.  I do notice I’m a better version of myself when I’m singing.  I can’t dance for shit, though.  I try.  I’d say that’s why guys don’t stick around, but I’ve had plenty of coffee dates not go well, so that can’t be it.”

They got to her apartment building, going up to her place to start watching Friends, ordering their pizza later.  Jenna grabbed a beer for JC, keeping it stocked in the fridge just for him.

‘Worst first date ever?” JC wondered.

“Hmmm.  There’s a couple.  I mean, it couldn't be THAT bad cuz I had a second date with both of them…  Ok, be ready, this is crazy.  Ok, maybe not CRAZY, but…”  She collected her thoughts.  “We met online, had talked for a bit beforehand if memory serves.  We agreed to go on a date, grab dinner and see where the night took us.  We went to a deli for dinner, then we drove in our own cars to a Jamba Juice.  I had never white the White Gummy Bear before, so he had me get it.  Wait, maybe it was the pink Starburst one.  Something based on a candy I loved, it was yummy.  Anyway, we decided to go see a movie at a small theater right by where we’d had dinner.  We decided to see Date Night, with Steve Carrell and Tina Fey…”

“Yeah, I’ve seen it.  It was pretty funny.”

“Well, you know the scene in the strip club?  We’re about halfway into the scene when I notice his eyes are closed.  I think we were holding hands or something, and he asked me to tell him when the scene was over.  So I now feel uncomfortable sitting next to a man that can’t even watch a movie where there’s no nudity, but women dressed in skimpy outfits.  I mean, it was rated R, and didn’t seem like it would be THAT kind of movie to have anything explicit.  So I’m watching to make sure it’s over, my eyes keep flitting over to him, his eyes still closed.  The movie ends, and we go home.”

“No kiss?” JC asked.

“Maybe a hug, but no kiss.  You could imagine my surprise when a couple days later he asks me on another date.”

“Did that one go better?”

“Yes and no.  He told me he’d pick me up at 7AM, and we drove to the beach.  Well, not just any beach, Santa Monica.  It’s super early, the only people out there were fishing, and even then we didn’t go onto the pier.  We went onto the beach and walked along the shore.  It was kinda romantic, I won’t lie, basically just us and the beach.  Nothing much was open, so we left after a bit, not even getting anything to eat.  He took me to this nice park, and we walked around a bit, talked.  Then he took me home.  Again, no kiss.”

“Sounds like a pretty great date though,” JC said.

“I thought so, but then he ghosted me.  I found out a few years ago, once I started doing karaoke, that he married a girl from his church and they’ve got a couple kids.  So definitely not in the cards.”

“And the other guy?”

“The date itself wasn’t bad, I’ll probably seem really petty.  Again, we met online and talked a bit.  We met at a sushi restaurant.  I hate sushi, I’ll get teriyaki chicken or the shrimp stuff since it’s cooked.  We talked about anime and things, but I couldn’t get past two things.  At that point, his hair was longer than mine was, and well…”

“What?”

“Ok, this is gonna be a weird reference point, but the best I could give.  His normal speaking voice sounded like something on helium doing a Mickey Mouse voice.  I’m a first soprano, so I have a pretty high singing voice, but when a man’s speaking voice is a higher register than mine, it was… off putting.”

“But you went on a second date with him.”

“I did, 6 weeks later.”

“It took him THAT long to ask you out again?”

“He’s in tech, computers or gaming or something.  He’d just started a new company with some of his friends, so he’d been super busy.  Again, no kiss after our first date.  None of the guys I dated kissed me on the first date.  But we went to a Chinese place I love, it was very short notice.  Like ‘hey, are you free tonight?  Can you meet for dinner in an hour?’ type short notice.  He let me pick where we ate, so I went for something similar but also I was more comfortable with.  Everything was fine, I think he might have actually liked me, but his schedule wouldn’t allow for much of a relationship, and I couldn’t get past his voice and hair.”

“Is my hair too long?” JC asked, running his fingers through his hair, self conscious.

“No, I love your look.  You do whatever you want, JC.  You look great no matter what.”

“You’re too kind.”

“I saw the TikTok you posted, you just know how to blow up the internet and get fans in a tizzy.”

“Yeah, I keep seeing stuff like ‘silver fox’.  I’m not even 50, am I too young to go full gray?”

“Whatever you wanna do, JC.  You’ve had some… interesting looks over the years.  I think we can handle this.”

“Define ‘interesting’...”

“Your soul patch phase, the Karen hair.  I mean, your hair is just as long as then, but it’s styled differently.”

“The soul patch was my ‘teenage dirtbag’ phase, as the social media craze right now goes.”

“You should do one!  Lord knows there’s enough pictures online and what you must have of your own memories with the guys or solo…”

‘I don’t even know where to start on stuff like that.  Maybe you should run my social media stuff…”

“I get ideas but have no follow through or even knowhow to do so.  But yeah…”

“Going back to your stories, those guys were idiots not to see what was right in front of them.”

“Now YOU’RE the one being too kind.”

“When was the last date you went on?”

“Pre COVID.”

“How many relationships have you been in?”

“A handful.  I was kinda in one a few years after Steve, my ex.  But it wasn’t my thing.  He wanted to be casual, and I’m a commitment type girl.  Turns out I chose correctly, he was dating 4 girls at once…”

“I get it,” JC said.  “On the one hand you wanna have fun, see what your options are, but once you find someone you really click with, that should be it, ya know?  That was me and Jen.  I wanted casual for a long time after Eva, and eventually Jen was like ‘you’re in or you’re out’.  I didn’t want to lose her, so I went all in.”

“Think you’ll ever get married?”

“Probably not.  The way things are, I’m happy.”

“Then that’s what matters.  You ready to jump back into the show?”

“Yeah.”  He was sitting next to her on the couch, leaving a little room between them. He wondered if he was trying too hard to not give away his feelings for her.

His phone buzzed. Hey, wanna bring Jenna over tomorrow? She wanted to meet the twins…

“Hey,” JC began, “you wanna go to Lance’s tomorrow?  Meet the twins, hang out a bit?”

“Sure.  Let me know if I need to bring anything.”

“Just yourself is fine, but I’ll ask,” JC smiled. 

Yeah. Need us to bring anything?

There’s an “us” now?  Bout damn time!

No, it’s not. No “us” us, but I’m sure I’m not just dropping her off at your place by herself…

I mean, you could… one of us would drive her home or something.  It’s warm still, wanna go for a swim? Let’s shoot for noon? Hang out and tire out the twins for their nap… Just bring yourselves, I’ll have Lisa pick something up.

Sounds good. See you then.

“Don’t need to bring anything. Well, a bathing suit. Lance thought it would be fun to wear out the twins in the pool before their afternoon nap.”

“They’re almost a year old already.  That’s crazy…”

“They’re so cute, such personalities already.”

“Do you see them a lot?”

“I stayed away for a bit. I felt intimidated a bit, I dunno. I didn’t see my nieces right away, either. Newborns are just so… little. I was scared I’d break them the first time I held them.”

“They’re pretty resilient, actually. Most of the time you’re sitting with them anyway, so it wouldn’t be that bad.  That’s actually your protective instinct kicking in, knowing to be careful with them. Sometimes it almost over-corrects into TOO careful.”

“They’re excited to see you again, have you meet the twins.  Further proof you really are one of us.”

“Sometimes I feel like I’m a charity case. Justin told me about you two getting me my job.”

“Just the interview.  When did you talk to him?”

“He came to back to school night this week, knowing I would be there. Probably gave Silas’s teacher and some of the moms a thrill that he showed up instead of sending the nanny or something.  He told me he came just to meet me.”

“Chris is excited to meet you next month, he’s super curious about you.  You’re staying at the casino?”

“Yeah, Friday night and Saturday night, I’ll fly back here Sunday so I’m home in time for school on Monday.”

“I’m sure he’ll want to hang out, so be prepared for that.  Ok, nicest place you’ve been to on a date…”

“Why all these questions about my dating life?”

“Just making small talk,” JC shrugged, knowing full well it was more than that.

“I mean, I was in college at that point…”

“At 25? Do you have a Masters?”

“I wish. I didn’t get good guidance on what to take at community college, so when I thought I was about ready to graduate, I was still missing half my classes needed.  Similar thing once I transferred to the university, I didn’t have a guidance counselor so I ended up taking the same classes I’d already taken.  Took me 8 and a half years, but I did it.  My parents met in community college. Dad never finished, mom got her AA, but that was it. They’ve worked together since 1977 I think?  Met while opening a JCPenney at one of the malls, then found companies where they could work together.”

Jenna started to blush.  “What?” JC wondered. 

“I have a habit of telling these long winded stories that have nothing to do with anything.”

“It was still on topic.  So nowhere fancy?”

“No.  I was broke, the guys I dated were broke, our friends were broke. My idea of a big night out was going to Red Lobster or Olive Garden, Buca di Beppo when I got older…”

“Ever go to any of those on a date?”

“No.”

“Not even with Steve?”

“No. We saved up for a group trip to Disneyland with friends, that’s where he proposed.  He was so nervous I’d find the ring in his pocket that he made a beeline for the castle.  Even then… sorry.”

“For what?”

“This is where my dates would go bad, talking about Steve.”

“I asked, so keep going.”

“I don’t even know if he asked. Half our group went to Disneyland, the other half went to California Adventure.”

“They didn’t know he was proposing?”

“He never got to tell them, I was always around.  So we’re taking pictures in front of the castle. I'm posing with our friend’s wife.  Steve was holding something of mine, hands it to me, then pretends to tie his shoe. I turn around and he’s on one knee with the box and the ring in his hands.  Other people were cheering for us, I’m sure I’m in other people’s vacation photos.  At least they can imagine we lived happily ever after.”

“You’ll get that, someday.”

“I’m…” she hesitated.  “I’m 39, JC.  It’s just not in the cards.”

“You don’t know that. May I say you look great for your age. Ok, that came off weird.  I didn’t even think you were 35, to be honest.”

“Flattery will get you nowhere, sir,” she teased. “Enough talking, let’s start watching the show. It’s almost time to order pizza at this point…”

They started watching the next episode, getting through season 1 and into season 2. JC wondered if Jenna would be like Rachel if she figured out his feelings for her, or someone said something.  He wasn’t really sure what he felt, wanting to hold onto what he’d had with Jen, but knowing there was a pull towards Jenna.

They ordered pizza, eating as they watched. Jenna had fallen asleep on his shoulder, JC wrapping his arm around her to be more comfortable. She curled into his embrace, everything feeling right. 

 

JC sighed. I don’t know how, I don’t know when… but I know I want more with Jenna.

“What do I wear to go swimming at Lance’s house?! Seriously, how is this my life, Kelly?”

“I don’t know, but I’ll take an invite next time.”

“Why not this time?”

“Let JC have you in a bathing suit all to himself.”

“Lance and Michael will be there, the twins…. I have that one piece…”

“You are wearing something sexy. You’re with two pop superstars. What if Lance goes live or posts pictures? You gotta be looking GOOD, girl.  Let me see what I’ve got in my room, or we’re doing a shopping run.”

“It’s September, everything is ready for Halloween or Christmas, summer is over.”

“Hang on,” Kelly said, heading to her room.  Jenna could hear her opening drawers, rifling through her things.  “AHA!” Kelly yelled triumphantly.

She came out, handing Jenna a dark maroon 2 piece. “Go try it on. Make sure you shave…”

Jenna rolled her eyes, going into the bathroom. She put on the bikini, raising her eyebrows in surprise at how good she looked. She opened the door, walking out to see Kelly’s response.

“Ooh, hot! It brings out the red of your hair, makes the blue of your eyes pop… Shows off that ass and your boobs.  JC is gonna eat you up!”

“I don’t think so. I’m sure Jen will be there, too.”

She definitely won’t be, Kelly thought to herself.  “Ok, throw on something cute over that and go have fun!”

Jenna threw on an off the shoulder shirt and frayed capris, finishing the look with her silver strappy sandals.  Her hair was in a braid that cascaded down her shoulder, but could go back when swimming.  She waited for JC to buzz for her to come down.  Soon enough she heard the buzz and went downstairs.

…

JC sat waiting in his Jeep, his eyes fixed on the front door. He saw a beautiful woman walk out, only realizing it was Jenna as she approached his car with a smile. She was stunning, very well put together.  He was speechless as she got in.

She gave him a quick hug, JC glad he was sitting down, arm over his lap, his body ready to give him away.

Jenna buckled up and JC pulled onto the street to drive to Lance and Michael’s.  “I’m so excited I get to meet the twins today.” Jenna said, leaning into JC’s shoulder. 

 

He had been spending a lot more time at Jenna and Kelly’s apartment lately, not that she minded. He seemed distant since that night at Heart.  She had tried to get him to talk about it, but then decided that if he wanted her to know he would tell her. She would settle for him being around and soak it all in for as long as it lasted. 

“Are you ok, JC?” she asked out of nowhere. 

He looked at her, into those beautiful, almost violet eyes of hers.  “Just a lot of stuff on my mind lately. Nothing for you to worry about.  We’ll be there soon,” he smiled, the smile that made her knees weak every time she saw it. 

Michael was waiting there at the door when they pulled up out front. He flew through the door, with a now mobile Violet not far behind her daddy.  Michael went straight for Jenna, giving her a huge bear hug while JC scooped Violet up off the ground and gave her a giant kiss and blew raspberries on her belly, until she was shrieking with laughter.

Michael and Jenna watched JC with Violet. “He’s good with her. He has had a thing for her ever since we brought them home. Not that he doesn’t love Alexander, but he has always had a deeper relationship with Violet.“

“Who am I? “ JC asked Violet as they walked into the house. 

“C!” Violet shrieked.

“Ummm, did she really answer him?” Jenna gasped.  “Wow, she’s really smart.  Like, shouldn’t be possible, smart…”

“ Uncle C!”  he smiled as he nuzzled Violet close. She reached up and grabbed his glasses off of his face triumphantly, holding them away from him as he tried to get them back. Lance saved the day and took Violet off of his hands as well, giving JC his glasses back. 

“Want a baby?” Michael asked, as he handed Alexander over to Jenna. Alex took one look at his new friend and smiled a huge toothy grin.  Michael grinned as well, “ Well it’s clear who he likes.“ 

“I’m good with kids, Michael. It comes with the territory. I see them 5 days a week in class. I love kids. “

“I know who else you love, too,“ he said, looking over at JC and Lance talking in the kitchen.

“Hey babe. You want a beer?” JC called.

“No. Water is fine,” she called back , not even thinking about what JC had just called her. 

“So, you’ve graduated up to BABE? “  Michael asked, eyes wide and an even wider smile. 

“No.  Not exactly. That’s the first time he ever called me Babe,”  she said, really thinking about what he’d said.

“Sounds like things are going well.” 

“‘Michael, we are….”

“I know, I know. You’re just friends. I got it,”  Michael said, rolling his eyes.

“We are,“ she repeated firmly.

“For now.”

“What is that supposed to mean.?”  she asked, “You know something that I don’t . What do you know about, Michael?”

“I’m not supposed to say anything,” he said, laughing nervously. 

“I’m not letting you out of my sight until I know what you do.”

“Let’s go out by the pool,” he said, taking Alexander and putting him in the play yard.

“We’re gonna go out to the pool, so I can show her the backyard,” Michael said.

“Alright, we’ll be out in a little while.” Lance said, watching them go out the back glass door.

He then turned, and said, “So, have you told her that Jen Left?”

“No. I have just been enjoying spending as much time with her as I want.”

“You really need to tell her, C.” 

“I know, I just don’t want her to think it’s her fault Jen left.” 

“Well…” 

It was at that point in their conversation that they heard Jenna shriek outside. 

They both ran out  to the back, Jenna stood there, staring at JC. She looked upset.

“We need to talk,” she said, and the boys scurried back into the house, shutting the door behind themselves. 

“Damnit, Michael told you, didn’t he?”

“What I can't figure out is why you didn’t tell me. “

“There’s not much to tell.”

“I know this complicates things, but… is it something I did?”

“What?” JC wondered.

“Michael said Jen isn’t coming to things if she knows I’m going to be there.  Is this because of what happened last week?”

“Oh,” JC sighed, knowing Michael hadn’t told her everything.  “Well, honestly… yes.  No matter how much I try to convince her, she thinks you have feelings for me.  She doesn’t want to cause any arguments or stress you out, and honestly, neither do I.”

“JC, what do we do?  I don’t want to come between you and Jen.  This isn’t how this was supposed to go.  Not that I had any kind of plan on anything…  You came in and saved my life, and I’m just trying my best to…” she stopped mid sentence, her face scrunching as tears welled up in her eyes.

“Please don’t cry, Jenna,” he said, moving closer to her. 

“JC, we can’t do this anymore.  We can’t be friends if…”

“Jen is just going to have to deal with it.  I like being around you, Jenna,” he said, pulling her into his arms.

“Don’t. Don’t say anything else. Please. Let’s go. I need to go home.”  She said, walking away from him. Then he got mad.

“Damn it Jenna, Will you listen to me? I was not finished” he said, exasperated. 

“ What, JC?  What more is there to say?  We’re just friends, we’ve made that quite clear to each other…" she countered. 

“Jenna, please.  It’s something she’ll get over, eventually.  She didn't like Autumn at first.  Do you really think she’ll get in the way of our friendship?”

“I’m more worried about being in the way of your relationship with your girlfriend.  I’m just some pitiable fan with a big enough sob story to keep you busy playing the hero…”

“Hey,” he said, pulling her back into his arms, tilting her chin up to look at him.  Their eyes met, and all he wanted to do was kiss her.  It wasn’t the moment, but he was about ready to stop giving a fuck and do what felt right.  “I care about you.  So do the rest of the guys.  Do you think Justin would have helped me get you the interview if you were some random fan I wasn’t going to care about in 6 months?”

“JC, you really see us being friends… long term?”

“ Yeah,” he smiled.  “I’d really like that, Jenna.  I’m sorry if you’ve felt less than during any of this.  Jen will get over it, she will.  Please stay, meet the twins properly, hang out.  Please?”

“Ok,” she sighed.  “But promise me that I won’t come between you and Jen.  If there’s more drama, I need to walk away.”

JC swallowed hard.  “Ok.”  He was suddenly nervous how she would take the truth, whenever it came out.  “Let’s go inside.”

They walked inside, the twins playing in their little play area.  Now that they were crawling, they were penned off to keep them from wandering and getting lost.  “They need bells around their necks if we just let them loose,” Michael joked.  They’ll be playing with one thing, you turn around for ONE SECOND, and they’re down the hall the next…”

“Oh yeah.  I teach kindergarten, but that still tracks.  We have some kids we have to separate cuz they’ve known each other since they were babies, so they’re too intense when they play together.  We try to keep them apart, but you look away for one second and they start playing together again.”

“Wanna head out to the pool and they can splash around a bit before we eat?  Lisa’s bringing food in a bit,” Lance said.

“Lance, I could have…” Jenna started.

“It’s fine, Jenna.  You don’t need to do anything.  Being around us is enough.  I take it back, putting up with this guy is enough.  You’re a saint,” he laughed, nodding toward JC.

“He makes it easy, I’ll say that,” she smiled.

They walked out to the backyard, Jenna suddenly nervous about getting into the pool.  Lance and Michael had no qualms about pulling their shirts off and getting into the pool with the twins.  She was enjoying the view, but nervous about JC seeing her with so little on.  As confident as she’d felt in it earlier, he wasn’t there to actually see it.

Her eyes caught JC pulling his shirt off, feeling her legs clench as she saw parts of him she’d only imagined after all these years.  He wasn’t cut like Lance and Michael, but he’d lost weight since the White House dinner, not that she felt he needed to.  If he was happy, that’s all that mattered.  She loved Justin’s “dad bod” look, so she was just happy being close to JC to see what she knew women all over Instagram would kill for.  There was some definition in his stomach, just enough that she could tell he’d been working out.  She suddenly looked away so he wouldn’t catch her staring at him.

“You gonna stand there Jenna, or you gonna get in?” Michael teased, having seen her look at JC.  JC gave her a reassuring smile.

She sighed, shaking off any insecurity, or at least trying to.  She was the only one not in the pool, feeling like all eyes were on her.  She felt like a brand new stripper on her first night of dancing, afraid to expose herself but knowing she needed to do it anyway.  She pulled down her capris before pulling the top over her head.

She looked at JC, who had a smile on his face.  It looked different somehow, like he liked how she looked in the bikini.  She wondered if he was looking at her the way she’d looked at him only moments earlier.  She shook off the feeling, knowing he was in love with Jen.  JC was glad he was in the water, obscuring some of what he was thinking and feeling.  Lance, of course, could read JC like a book, and smiled as he saw JC try to contain himself.

“That’s a great color on you,” JC said, trying to make conversation that didn't sound creepy.

“That’s a great cut,” Michael said, giving zero fucks.  "Damn, Jenna, you might turn me,” he teased.

“You look great,” Lance smiled, being sincere and less awkward than his husband.

JC grabbed Violet from Lance, holding her out a short distance and slowly spinning around in the pool.  Violet squealed in delight, Jenna watching and seeing how good JC was with her.  She knew he had his two nieces and the twins, but damnit he’d have made a great dad if he’d wanted that.  She sighed, knowing she’d never get that chance for herself.  The smile from her face soon faded.

“You ok, Jenna?” JC asked, snapping her back to the moment.

“Yeah, just something that popped into my head,” she shrugged.

“Wanna talk about it?” Lance asked.

“We’re great listeners…” Michael added.

“Maybe it’s different cuz you’re men, but how is it being an older parent?  Let’s be honest, you’re likely gonna be the oldest parents in the play groups and classroom.”

“I won’t lie, it was a consideration as different attempts failed.  But if it’s something you want, you go for it.”

“I just wonder if I missed my chance.  I’ve been single for so long, not that I could have done much about that, god knows I tried…”

“Life will lead you to the perfect people and moments in your life.  When God closes a window, he opens a door.  Something like that,” Michael laughed.  

“You’ll find someone that you can have that with,” JC said softly, Lance and Michael looking at him, trying to hide the confusion in their heads from showing on their faces.

Jenna got to play with both of the twins in the pool, forgetting all about her doubts and focusing on the twins, feeling more at ease around them, as well as their famous dads.  

The sliding glass door opened, Lisa walking through with a couple large bags.  “Lunch is here!”

They sat down at the table, Lisa pulling out bbq chicken, Hawaiian rolls, a pesto pasta salad, fresh fruit, roasted veggies skewers, and a 6 pack of Mike’s hard Lemonade.

“We got that instead of hard seltzers cuz you don’t do vodka,” Lance said.  “It’s a shame, though.  So many great vodka drinks.”

“You’re free to have those, I enjoy the room not spinning…” Jenna laughed.

They enjoyed the afternoon talking and eating before playing with the babies some more inside. As they afternoon wore on, Violet crawled over to Jenna, almost pulling herself up to stand.

“I think she wants you, Jenna,” Michael said.  Jenna pulled her into her arms, grabbing a couple toys and books nearby to entertain her.

JC smiled as he watched her with Violet.  He’d never thought about being a dad, but after realizing his feelings for her, and seeing how good she was with the twins, he was reconsidering, if he was being honest with himself.  

Violet was sitting in Jenna’s lap, her eyes were heavy, she had her head nuzzled on Jenna’s chest.  Michael came out of the nursery from putting Alexander down and said, “I’ll take her, Jenna.”

“Please, let me. I haven’t done this in a while.”  She smiled and got up and carried Violet into the nursery. The boys watched her on the video monitor in the living room. She sat down on the rocker and began to sing “Baby Mine” from Dumbo to Violet.  Violet was asleep in minutes, and she was quiet. It was then that Michael noticed something was different.

 

“ JC? What’s going on with Jenna?” 

“JC? What’s going on with Jenna?” 

He looked at the baby monitor and saw Violet sleeping on her lap, but Jenna was staring forward. Her arms twitched.

He sprinted down the hallway to the nursery, Michael and Lance right behind him. Michael took the baby off her lap and put her in her crib.

JC got in Jenna’s face. "Jenna, baby can you hear me?" He shook her shoulders lightly. No response.  

"Help me get her down on the floor…"  Lance helped him get her to the floor, laying her on her side.

"Jenna, wake up, come back," JC said softly, almost pleading, shaking her shoulders again.  She turned her head, and looked up at him dazed, a glossed over look in her eyes. 

"Baby, look at me,” he said, her eyes closed again. 

She opened them again and said," JC…What happened?"

"I'm calling an ambulance," Lance said, grabbing his phone.

"No," Jenna said weakly. 

"Honey, you need medical attention," Lance said.

"They will load me up with drugs I'm already on and send me home. No. I just want to go home. Please." 

"That can be arranged," JC said, picking her up in his arms and carrying her out of the room. He carried her out to the Jeep and belted her in. Lance and Michael followed them out of the house, Michael with Jenna's bag. 

"Are you gonna be ok?'' Michael asked her.

Jenna nodded. "I'll be fine.  Take my meds and sleep it off. I'm sorry it happened while I was holding Violet. "

"Honey, Vi is ok. I'm more worried  about you. Are you sure you're OK? "

“I'll be fine. I just need to go home. " She smiled at her new friend. 

*****

As they drove back to  her apartment,  she nodded off. He took this time to call Kelly and let her know what was going on .

Her phone rang 2 times and she picked up.

"Hey, how did meeting the twins go?"

"A little rocky at first, but things are good now.  She had a seizure at Lance’s  place. He was ready to call an ambulance.  " 

"Is she ok?"

"She is alert, and said she wants to go home and not the hospital.".

"I'll be waiting for you when you get here . "

“Should be there in 20 minutes."

She opened the door for JC, who was holding a very sleepy Jenna in his arms.  He went straight to her bedroom, and placed her onto her bed.

Kelly watched JC take care of her best friend tenderly.  It made her want to cry, honestly.

"Did she take her meds?" Kelly asked.

"When we first got into the car. It was weird. She was putting Violet to sleep in the rocker, singing to her, then she just... stopped.  No shaking or anything.  Just not responding."

"Petit Mal, absent seizures. It’s a good thing you guys noticed.  They usually slip by people as just spacing out.  She has those from time to time, though more so lately.  I guess it's from all the stress from this summer. They still haven't gotten her medications right." Kelly smiled at him.  "You take good care of her, like you've been doing it your entire life. She needs that."

"She doesn’t know Jen left.  Michael fed her some BS story that Jen is jealous and not coming to things if Jenna’s going to be there.”

“I mean, she won’t be, but there’s more to it than that,” Kelly said.  ‘Seriously, you look so natural in how you take care of her.  Maybe you missed your calling in the medical profession.”

“I hate needles, I wouldn’t last 5 minutes in an ER or doctor office,” JC chuckled.

"I'm glad you’re in her life," Kelly said, "I'm gonna go to bed now. I have an early shift in the morning . Stay as long as you like. Just lock up if you leave. "

JC looked down at a sleeping Jenna and said, "I'm staying right here. Next to her." 

"In that case, good night."

"Night. " He waved as Kelly shut the bedroom door behind her. He kicked off his shoes and laid down beside Jenna and wrapped his arms around her. It felt like home.

…

She woke up the next morning in a t- shirt and her underwear, and had no idea how she had wound up there. She felt a warm body next to her. She settled into him. 

She sucked in her breath when she felt his length, hard and firm against her butt, her eyes widening.  She turned to look at the person next to her, seeing JC in just his boxer briefs. 

"You ok? " Josh asked

“Yeah. How um... Did we?" Jenna asked, not sure what was going on. 

"No, you had a seizure at Lance and Michael's, and were pretty out of it for the rest of the night. You said you were hot, so you wanted to take off your clothes and you did. Down to the t-shirt I talked you into." 

“And why are you, well…?”

“You told me to get comfortable.  Sorry about… you know…”

“It’s morning, I get it,” Jenna shrugged. 

You really don’t, JC chuckled to himself.

“Well, I’m going to take a shower, feel somewhat human again.  I’ll meet you in the living room in a bit and start on breakfast?”

JC nodded, trying not to stare at her ass as she pulled the covers off of her and got up out of bed.  She walked out the door, turning to head into the bathroom.  JC slowly got out of bed, pulling on his clothes and sitting on the couch.

He sat, thinking about what had transpired between him bringing her home the night before to them waking up that morning.

…

He was holding her in his arms, enjoying the moment, when she started to squirm.  JC was anxious, not sure whether to hold her tight or let her go.

“I’m hot…” she groaned, JC letting her out of his grip.  He was surprised when she got out of bed and started peeling off her clothes.

“Jenna,” he said, turning to face the wall.

“JC, don’t,” she said softly.  “I want you to look at me.”

This isn’t Jenna, she’d never be ok with this.  She was nervous just getting down to her bathing suit earlier…

“Look at me, JC.  I like you.  I want you to like me back, but I know you don’t.  You have Jen, but let me have this moment.  Let me have a night where my fantasy comes true.”

She’d gotten down to her underwear, reaching behind her to unclasp her bra.  She smiled at him seductively as she lowered it.  JC honestly tried not to look., knowing this wasn’t Jenna, but god did he ever want to look.  Seeing her in the bathing suit, he couldn’t help but notice her breasts.  Now seeing them on full display, his body was giving zero fucks about being turned on by her. Her nipples were erect, JC wishing he could touch them, tease her with his fingers and mouth.

 She put her hands on her low waisted panties, turning around to show him her ass.  As she bent over, he could almost swear he saw her turned on, glistening in the moonlight.  It was getting hot as hell in that room, even with her fan on and the window open.

“Jenna, put a shirt and some underwear on, please.”

“Do you like what you see, JC?” she asked with a smirk.

“Y… yes,” he replied honestly.  

“Shit.  Jen…” she sighed, a change in her eyes, like she was coming back to reality.  She put on a t-shirt and panties, looking at JC again.  “Are you leaving soon?”

“I’m staying right here by your side.”

She smiled.  “Hmmm, you wrote a song about that…”  JC thought she sounded more like she was drunk, knowing she wasn’t fully out of her daze.  “Get comfy, JC.  I’m sure sleeping in jeans and that shirt aren’t what you normally wear, and can’t be comfortable.”

He pulled the covers back for her, letting her get into bed before covering her up.  He got up from the bed, almost feeling like this moment was leading somewhere, that she’d want something.  He wanted it too, but he knew not to take advantage.  She likely wouldn’t remember any of this in the morning, and he didn't want that.  He pulled his jeans and shirt off, climbing back onto the bed and laying next to her, over the blankets.

“You can get under the covers with me, JC.  It’s ok, I promise.”

“Jenna, no…”

“Please?” she quietly begged, her eyelashes fluttering lightly.  

Fuck.  He almost lost control then and there, wanting to just kiss her and see how the moment played out.  Almost.  If she didn’t remember in the morning, he still would, and would feel like shit that he did it while she wasn’t in her full mind.  If that was how she really felt about him, turned on in his presence, he wanted her fully awake and aware of what was going on.  Give them both something to remember.

…

She came out into the living room, JC smiling at her choice of outfit.  She was wearing the purple tee from their latest merch release, along with the white and purple tie dyed sweatpants.  

“Nice outfit,” he smiled.  

“Thank you, I’m glad it got the JC seal of approval twice…”

“Twice?”

“Once to put it in the merch release, and now with me wearing it.  Like when Jen was walking Bronson in the green set.  We all just about died.  Then waiting almost a year to get the chance to buy them…”

“You look super comfy, that was the plan.”

“The sweatpants fit me perfectly. I run warm normally, and I feel comfortable in these. I bought them for when we have pajama spirit days at school. I just need the perfect shoes.”

JC smiled, a plan forming.  “Any idea when that would be?”

“Probably around Christmas?  I’m sure that would make sense, right before the holiday break.”

JC sat quietly, not saying anything, his mind working on several different thoughts at once.

“JC, nothing happened last night, did it?  You mean it?”

“Nothing happened.  You started to change, I made sure I didn't look, I merely suggested you put on something, mostly for when you woke up.  I’m going to ask this carefully, but do you normally sleep naked?”

“No.  That must have just been me in my post seizure state.  Oh god, did I say anything?  Kelly told me I can be a bit like a drunk person, saying things I probably shouldn’t, DOING things I normally wouldn’t.”

“No, you didn't say anything.  Do you need to see your doctor about this?  I know you refused going to the hospital…”

“I’ll make an appointment as soon as possible, yeah.  I’m taking my meds like I’m supposed to, and still having seizures.”

“I just… worry that things between us are too much for you to handle,” he sighed.

“How do you mean?”

“You’re so set on not coming between me and Jen, and you’re not.  But almost like you’re wanting to push me away at the same time you want to be friends.  Maybe you’re draining yourself emotionally and it’s having this effect?”

“I don’t know.  Honestly, I’m happiest since meeting you, JC.  You saved my life that day, but you brought me back to life in other ways.  As weird as it is, I have new friends, people I feel like actually care about me.  I just never thought they’d be members of my favorite band.  After yesterday, I’m not just a charity case, I’m a friend.  That means a lot to me…”

Tears welled up in her eyes.  “You sure you’re ok?” JC asked.

“16 year old me would never believe this.  The things I’ve been through, that your music got me through… it almost makes sense that I’d be here, but at the same time, it sounds too good to be true.  This is either a huge delusion in my head and I’m in a coma somewhere, or I’m really living the best version of my life, everything I’ve ever wanted for myself but never thought I’d get.  Most fans would kill to trade places with me right now.  We consider you guys friends in our heads, but to actually be friends with you, to be invited to Lance’s house, meet the twins, not just meeting you for a brief moment at something like the party at Heart or at Rocco’s, it’s a dream come true and then some.  These are tears of joy, the people I’ve looked up to the last 20 years are the people I hoped they were.  I’ve never really felt like I belonged anywhere, but the fandom gave me a place that was mine.  I feel like I’m a ‘lot’ for some people, so even within the fandom I don’t have friends, just people I interact with on a very basic level of being a fan.  So for you to take me as I am like this " 

He stood and walked over to her, and put his fingers up to her lips, "Don’t you know you are perfect the way you are, Jenna? Whoever made you feel that way was an idiot.”

She reached up and touched his hand. He took her hand and kissed the back of it. He moved their hands to stop over his heart. She felt his heart racing under her hand. She looked up and into his azure colored eyes. They smoldered, and made her entire body tingle. “Don’t ever let anyone make you feel less than, Jenna. You are so much more than that. Anyone would be lucky to have you.”

“You think so?” she whispered.

“I know so,” he said, dropping her hand and cupping her cheek.  Their lips so close to one another's that they could feel each other’s breath. She closed her eyes, and he pulled away, leaving her standing there alone. 

He slammed the bathroom door behind him. He held onto the counter and took several deep breaths. His heart was racing.  He felt like he was going to puke. Great Chasez, you better get your shit together. You can’t fuck this up. He dry heaved into the toilet, but there was nothing to throw up.

“JC, are you ok?” He heard Jenna’s voice on the other side of the door. 

“I’m fine.” He lied. I have to get out of here. I want you so bad I can’t even control myself. God, please help me. He prayed silently.  He collected himself and opened the door to a very concerned Jenna. 

“I need to go home. I need to take Bronson for a walk. I’ll call you later. OK?” he said, grabbing his shoes and lacing them up and grabbing his keys off the kitchen counter. 

“ JC…” she said as he was walking toward the door. He stopped and looked back at her. She walked up to him and kissed him on the cheek. “ Thank you for last night. Taking care of me. You didn’t have too. But, I’m glad you did.” 

“I’m glad I did too,” he said, kissing her on top of the head, and pulling away from her.  “I really do need to go. I’ll see you Friday,” he said, touching her face one more time. He brought her close to him and brushed his lips lightly against hers.  And with that he was gone. 

 

Jenna stood at the door, her fingers against the lips he had just kissed. She shut it behind her, all the while thinking to herself What the hell just happened?

JC sat in his Jeep outside Jenna’s apartment for a good 30 minutes trying to get himself together. Finally he pushed the starter and the Jeep roared to life.  He pulled away from the curb and set his sights on going anywhere other than his house.  

While he made his way to Highway 101, a phone call came through on his bluetooth. 

“Hey. I just called to check up on Jenna.” Lance’s voice boomed into the car.

“She’s ok. I actually just left there. She is much better,” JC said, trying not to think about last night or what had just happened between them. 

“You spent the night? How’d that go?” Lance asked. 

“She slept through the night,” he said nervously.

“C. What’s going on? Are you Ok?” 

“I didn’t sleep very well. I was worried about her. “ He lied. 

“Ok, Well, I just wanted to check in and make sure everything was ok with her. I’ll let you go and get some rest,” Lance said, ending the call.

He continued to drive north on The PCH, not really knowing where he was going . Just that he needed to clear his head. 

...

He drove until the gas light dinged in the Jeep. He looked around and realized that he was a long way from home, and he was still not in his right mind. He pulled off at the first gas station that he found and gassed up, then later pulled off the highway when he saw a stretch of beach that looked secluded.

He sat there in the Jeep for a long time, staring blankly out over the water. 

His phone ringing broke him out of his trance.  He looked down and saw that it was a FaceTime from Justin.

He sighed and slid the icon to the right and answered the call. 

Justin looked less than thrilled to be making this call. 

"Hey, what the hell do you keep taking off for? This is the second time in a month," he said, exasperated. “If this is about Jenna, just fuck her and get yourself out of this misery you’re in.”

JC felt his blood start to boil. He was not in the mood to have this conversation with Justin or anyone for that matter.

"Will you fucking just stop?!" he said, "If that's all you called me about, I'm hanging up." 

"No. Don't hang up, man. I'm sorry.  I'm just worried about you. Jenna called me when you didn't call her this afternoon.  She said you acted funny when you left the apartment. She said you went home so you could walk Bronson, and you weren't at home. I went there an hour ago, and you weren't home earlier today.  Where are you?”

"I'm at a beach in San Simeon.  I had to drive to try and get out of my head.  After I saw her naked last night, I can't get her outta my head." 

Justin was shocked to say the least.  "You saw Jenna naked and you didn't tap that ass? Maybe you did lose your mind or something, man." 

"She had a seizure at Lance’s place last night.  I took her home and stayed with her. She said she was hot. Then she got up and proceeded to strip for me. Not in her right mind, I might add. Then told me to get comfortable. I had to talk her down and make her put on a t- shirt and underwear. I think I slept about 2 seconds last night. "

"Is she ok?"  

"Yeah, She was fine this morning when I left. She has no idea what she did. I didn't tell her. She asked me to look at her, I couldn’t help BUT look  at her…  She wanted me to let her have one fantasy come true…"

"Fuck, yeah, I’d be wound up too.  You wanna do everything and nothing at the same time.  And you still haven't told her about Jen leaving, have you? "

"No." JC shook his head back and forth.

“Do you ever plan on telling her?” Justin asked, obviously perturbed.

“In my own time.”

“Or to use as an excuse not to be with her? Why can’t you just be with her, C? You both know that’s what you want deep down,”  Justin said, rubbing his brows. 

“I know that, now that I know how she feels, unfiltered. I don’t know why I can’t tell her. “ 

“Do you want me or Kelly, or maybe Michael or Lance to tell her?”

"No. It needs to come from me. I guess with all of the seizures she's had because of me lately,  I'm afraid it will trigger another one. It was scary.  The one she had came out of nowhere. "

 "C. I really don't think you caused her to have a seizure. "

"Maybe not, but I'm still worried about her.”

"Because you are in love with her, C."

He hung his head, knowing that Justin was right. He was head over heels in love with this girl and needed to stop fighting it so hard .

"You're right,” he replied.  He looked at the clock In the jeep. It said 5:30 pm.

"I've got a long drive ahead of me. I should go.  Thanks for talking me down again, T."

"No problem. Go get your girl."  

JC smiled and ended the call.

…

She woke up to the buzzer from downstairs ringing. Getting up off the couch, she answered.

"It's almost 11 o'clock, this better be good…”

"Jenna, It's me. Please, can I come up?"

"The door is unlocked,” she said, buzzing him in..

She heard the door open, and she stood up and practically ran to him, hugging him tightly.

“I was so worried about you. Are you ok? " she said, looking up at him, trying to read him.

He didn't say anything, just held onto her.

"JC, what’s wrong?" He was almost trembling.  She could tell he was really upset.

" Jen left," he replied, not even looking at her, just relieved that he had finally told her.

"Oh my God. I'm so sorry. This is my fault."  She dropped her arms from him and walked away.

Shit. I knew she was gonna think this was her fault.

"Jenna. This was not your fault. It was mine." 

"You’re sure?” she asked, her violet eyes full of tears.

"I'm sure." He opened his arms up to her, and she fell into them. She looked up at him, he looked exhausted .

She pulled him by the hand down to her bedroom door.

"Jenna, no…”

"Come in.  Let's go to sleep." She led him to the bed, he laid down, clothes and all.

"JC, you can't be comfortable like that." 

"I'm fine. Get in," he said, pulling the blankets up. She settled into his arms, and snuggled up  against his warm body. 

...

He spent the better part of 12 hours sound asleep in Jenna’s bed. Truth be told,  there was no place he'd rather be than with her. 

He opened his eyes to find that she was gone. He picked up his phone and looked to see what time it was.  It was well after noon. He sat up and stretched, and got up off the bed in search of the bathroom.

He looked at himself in the mirror, seeing just how tired he looked. He had needed the sleep, that was for sure. 

He walked into the living room, the quiet of the apartment was almost deafening.  Yet he felt more at home there than in his own home.  He smelled coffee, knowing it would be cold.  But coffee was coffee, and he could use some right about now.  He’d told her part of the truth, now he needed to come out with the rest.  As hard as it was to tell her Jen had left, he felt it harder to tell her he was in love with her.  She had been so open and vulnerable with him, literally naked in front of him, and he couldn’t tell her.  He was afraid of setting her off again.  Hell, she might think he made up Jen leaving to justify wanting to sleep with her and “cheat” on his girlfriend.  

He walked to the coffee maker, finding it still warm, almost fresh.  There was a folded note with his name on it with a mug over one corner.  He pulled the note free, opening it slowly.  In the most perfect handwriting he’d ever seen, he read her words to him.

JC, I’m not sure what time you’ll wake up, so I hope the coffee is still warm. I tried to set it for later in the morning.  Since it’s Monday, I’m at work, but believe me when I say I’d rather be at home.  Call it being chicken, taking the easy way out by leaving it in a note, something you might not even see or read, but I like you.  More than I should.  I hope Jen leaving isn’t because of me, but part of me is relieved.  You can come over whenever you want.  I doubt you feel the same way, I felt how much you were shaking just telling me she left, this must have you shaken up pretty bad.  But I figure you should know.  I know we’re just friends, I’m not your type, but you miss 100% of the shots you don’t take.  Enjoy the coffee and feel free to throw this note in the trash, assuming you read it at all.  Jenna

 

He wasn’t about to throw the note away, not now, not ever.  This was the kind of thing you held onto, showed your kids and grandkids in memories of how you met the love of your life.  Is that what Jenna was?  As much as he thought Jen had been that for him, the pull he felt for Jenna was more intense, not just because it was new.  He knew he’d never felt this for anyone, not even Jen.  As much as that broke his heart a little, he hoped this meant there was a chance for him to be really, truly happy with someone.

“Good morning,” the receptionist greeted.

“I have an appointment with Dr. Chu, Jenna Pollard…”

“Sign in here and we’ll call you soon.”

Jenna signed in on the sheet, also giving the receptionist her insurance card.  She was glad it had come in the mail so quickly, she needed to see a doctor after her recent bout of seizures, even on medication.

She went onto Instagram, scrolling through her *NSYNC related posts that popped up on her feed.  It was fun to watch the fan made videos and things, but she knew people would freak out if she posted about being friends with any of the guys.  She wasn’t anyone, but finding out she was close to them could get her the wrong attention.  She’d stopped reading fanfic, the last thing she needed was to get thoughts into her head that she stood a chance with JC.  

“Jenna Pollard,” the nurse called, Jenna walking down a hall.  She sat in a fairly stark exam room.  She pulled out her phone again, looking through her text thread with JC.  He apologized for worrying her after taking off on her, but she worried that maybe it was getting to be too much for him.  She wished she knew why he took off, but was glad he was ok.  She smiled as she looked further back, little jokes he sent her based on episodes they’d watched.

She straightened up when she heard the door open.  “Jenna, what brings you in today?”

“I’ve been having seizures even with my medication being consistent.  I had an absent seizure on Saturday…”

“You’re supposed to report those, you know that…”

“I know.  I didn't want to go to the hospital, knowing I could do the same treatment at home, but that’s part of why I came in today.  To make you aware.  I know I’d been under some stress with the one that caused the accident, but my life has been better, less stressful.  I’m lucky I didn't drop the baby I was holding Saturday, that my friends could see me on the monitor in the nursery and took quick action.  I’m getting worried.”

“We’ll review the scans they took when you were last admitted, I don’t want to run more scans at this point unless necessary.  The petit mal could be a sign that we need to change your dosage, nothing major.”

“So that’s it for now?” Jenna wondered.  “I’ve been getting headaches, too.  More than usual.  Nothing severe, Tylenol usually helps, but yeah…”

“Is your vision changing?”

“A little blurry at times, but I can manage.”

“Let’s make an appointment to see if you need glasses.  You’re almost 40, it’s not a bad idea.  That might help the headaches for sure.  Otherwise, we’ll look at changing your dosage and things if we can avoid doing another scan.  We’ll look over your file and let you know if we change your dosage.  If you have more petit mals, just send me an email to add it to your file, ok?  I know it doesn’t help you get to drive sooner, a seizure is a seizure, but if we can figure this out so you don’t have more, we can help you return to your normal life.”

Normal life, Jenna thought.  Her life had become anything but, and she wasn’t complaining.  “Thank you, Dr. Chu.”

She took the bus to work, hoping the kids would be a distraction.  For the most part they were, especially when she was actively teaching.  But during breaks and lunch, she was lost in her own thoughts.

“You ok?” Kim asked.

“Yeah.  They’re gonna try and change my dosage, and I need to get my eyes checked.  I’m just worried something will happen while I’m at work…”

“It’s just us, so what would I need to do if it did?”

“Get me to lie down, whether it’s a big or small one, away from everyone.  Have me lie on my side so I won’t choke.  Time everything, and if it lasts longer than 5 minutes, call 911.  Our classes are all connected, see if you can get the kids to another room, just tell them I’m not feeling good.  Try to stay as calm as possible.  Hopefully I only get the small ones here, that’s easier to pass off as being sick or tired than a grand mal.  Once I stop, see if I’m responsive.  I might be really out of it, but I should wake up, be breatheing.  My accident was the only time I didn’t really wake up.  I was breathing, but wasn’t responding to Josh banging on my car window.”

“Are you going to tell Josh about the doctor visit?”

“No.  It was all in response to what he was there for on Saturday.  It’s weird though, I’m getting flashes of what feels like memories, or maybe more like fantasies…”

“Fantasies?”

“I was naked in front of him, and told him how I felt.  It does fall into what I’d say or do after having a seizure, though a bit extreme.  But he would’ve told me, wouldn’t he?”

“How DO you feel about him?” Kim asked.

“It doesn’t matter, he has a girlfriend, or at least he DID.  She left this weekend,” she sighed.

“How do you feel?” Kim pressed.

“I’m in love with him…”

…

Jenna was on the playground at work the next day when her phone started buzzing.  It was Dr. Chu’s office.  She was afraid to know why they’d call so soon after her visit yesterday.

“I need to take this, I’ll be right back,” Jenna said, heading towards her classroom.  

“This is Jenna,” she said, answering the call as she opened the door to her classroom.  

“Yes, this is Dr. Chu’s office.  Dr. Chu reviewed your paperwork  and recent scans.  They found an abnormality.  We’d like to have you come in and do an MRI so we can run another scan.  I’m sorry that whoever at the ER didn't notice this.  It’s hard to say what we’re looking at for sure, but another MRI will help us get a clearer picture.  You can schedule an appointment in radiology through the app.  We'd also like you to schedule a visit with Dr Black. He is one of our Neurosurgeons that deals with brain tumors."

She shook her head, sure she heard her wrong. "Brain tumor?" 

"Yes. I sincerely believe that is what triggered your seizure that caused your accident.”

“I’m at work, so I need to go, but thank you, I’ll schedule those appointments,” she said, hanging up.  There was a pit in her stomach.  They’d found something, wanting to look into it more.  This couldn't be good.

The look on her face showed something was wrong.  “Everything ok?” Kim asked, the other teachers looking at her briefly.

“Just the doctor’s office in response to my visit yesterday…”

“Wanna talk about it at lunch?” Kim wondered.

“Not sure there’s much to tell, but yeah, away from the kids.”

…

The kids had all gone to lunch, Jenna having grabbed her lunch from the staff room before going back to their classroom.  She wished they had room for a mini fridge, but also wasn’t sure it would be allowed.  She started heating up her food as the other kindergarten teachers came in and sat down.

“So what was the call earlier?” Kim started.

“Well, I had a petit mal on Saturday, an absent seizure.  I basically spaced out, no shaking, but still a seizure.  I was holding a friend’s baby, so I’m lucky nothing worse happened.  I have no memory of it.  I went in because I’ve been having seizures even with my medication on track.  They think I might need a change in dosage.  Then they called earlier, saying they found an abnormality.  They want to do an MRI as soon as possible.”

“Jenna, I’m sorry,” one of the other teachers said.  “I had no idea.”

“It’s about time you knew, in case I have one while at work.  Here, they’ll want to send me to the hospital.  I worry it’ll be in front of the class and traumatize them seeing me have either a grand mal or even space out and need to be taken away.”

“I’ll take you after dismissal duty today, I don’t want you taking the bus there and then have to worry about getting home.” Kim offered.

“I made an appointment for Thursday, that was the soonest time.  What about your daughter?  I can’t have her worried about me.”

“I’ll drop you off, leave her in extended care, and then pick her up after I drop you off at home.  If it takes a while, I’ll get her and take her home first.  My husband should be home, or my older daughter can watch her.  We’ll get this figured out so you aren’t worrying about getting there and home.”

“I feel like I’m being a burden,” Jenna sighed.

“Would you feel like that if Josh offered to take you?”

“Oooh, who’s Josh??” one of the other teachers cooed.

“He’s the guy that saved my life.  Made the 911 call.  We’ve gotten to be friends.  I might feel like it’s a lot, but at the same time, he’s done a lot for me in regards to this…”

“I’m closer, you wouldn’t have to wait for him or anything like that.”

“I’ll let Kelly know so she doesn’t worry when I’m home late.”

She took out her phone, texting Kelly about needing to get an MRI, not wanting to worry JC.

…

JC was sitting at the mixing board in the studio with his new artist, Sasha. She had been wailing  for hours and he was just over it .

His phone jingled in his pocket, and he pulled it  out. He saw that it was a message from Kelly. His eyes widened when he saw the message. 

Call me. 911

He set his phone on the counter and hit the mic. "Let's take 20. I need to make a phone call."

The girl with a face full of piercings rolled her eyes "Come on, man. I'm in the zone."

That statement  got an eye roll from him. If your zone is sounding like a wounded moose on its way out.

He got up and left the sullen girl alone in the booth and walked out in the hallway. 

His phone started ringing, and he picked up the call.

"Kelly, what’s  wrong?"

"Jenna needs you. Right now. I can't talk about it on the phone, but you need to be here."

"Did she have another seizure? " he asked, feeling his anxiety level rise. 

"No. Please JC. She is gonna need you. I'll explain once you get here."

“Let me wrap this up, and I will be over,” he said, and thanked Kelly silently for getting him out of this session.

He hung up  with her, and went back into the studio.  He hit the mic and said, "Sasha, I have an emergency that I need to take care of.  I have to go. Call the office and we can try again for next week."

"I'm gonna tell Eric about this,” she said,  snotty attitude and all.

"I hope you do. See you next week," he said, grabbing his bag and walking out of the studio to his Jeep. 

He drove over the speed limit to her apartment building. A feeling of dread set in with him. He did not like this at all. He buzzed and the door automatically opened and he hit the number 3 on the elevator keypad and waited impatiently for the doors to open.

He headed down the hall and Kelly was standing in the hallway waiting for him. Her face said it all. She pulled him into the apartment quickly.

"Kelly,  what's going on? Where’s Jenna? " he asked, looking around the apartment. 

"In her room," she said quietly. He headed down the hall.

"JC, wait. She got a call from that Neurologist, Dr. Chu, she saw after her last seizure. It was one of his NPs. She said they found something in the last CT that the doctors at Good Samaritan didn't find."

"What did they find? "

"She said it was an abnormality. But they want to be sure. They wanted her to schedule an MRI ASAP, and see a neurosurgeon." 

"A surgeon?" The color started to drain out of his face. They said the same thing to Dad when he was diagnosed with…..

He couldn't breathe for a second. He must've been worse than he thought, because Kelly steered him over to the couch.

"JC? Are you Ok? I don't need everyone fading out on me today," Kelly said, snapping her fingers to get his attention. He stared wide-eyed at her and came back to reality. 

"I'm ok. I need to see her," he said, standing up and going over to her door and knocking softly. He got no response, but opened the door anyway and stepped into her room, closing the door behind him. 

She heard the door open, and turned over to see him standing there. She sat up on the bed and he sat down next to her hugging her so tightly that she could barely breathe. 

She could feel his tears in her hair.  He loosened his grip on her and looked down into her violet colored eyes.

"I…" He tried to find the words, but nothing came out.

" I'm scared, JC…" was all Jenna could say .

He pulled her close again and whispered into her ear. "I'm right here and I'm not going anywhere.  Please, you can call me Josh.  I haven’t been JC in a long time… " 

She laid her head in his chest and cried. They stayed that way for a long time.

"I scheduled the MRI for Thursday,” she whispered 

"I'm canceling everything on my calendar for the foreseeable future," he said, running his hand through her hair. 

"No. Josh. I can't have you doing that for me," she protested as his fingers were flying on his phone.

"It's already done. I'm available whenever you need me," he said, matter of factly.  "Nothing is as important as your health right now.  That's the end of it." 

 

At this point she didn't care anymore, she just held onto him for dear life.