The deadly silence ended the second the door shut behind him. The bomb that had been ticking in me the entire drive finally exploded.

“How could you just tell her?” I exploded, tearing my coat from my body in anger. “What were you thinking?!”

“How the hell was I supposed to know you hadn’t told you mom, Cassie? You could have filled me in.”

“I was going to ease her into it. She DIDN’T need to hear about it from YOU.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“She doesn’t like you! And you know that! You should have known I wouldn’t have told her yet!”

His face hardened and he ran his hand back and forth the top of his shaved head and stared at the wall behind me. When his eyes finally met mine, they were narrowed. “It’s not right that you can’t tell your own mother that you’re moving in with your boyfriend who you have been seeing for over a damn year,” he stated in a monotone voice.

“She doesn’t like you, Justin,” I insisted.

“That’s not my problem anymore, Cassie. Your mom’s a bitch.”

My eyes widened when the word exited his mouth. “Don’t call her that!”

A frustrated noise left him. “You call her that all the time!”

“She’s MY mother. I’m allowed to call her whatever I want. You aren’t!”

He shook his head. “Bottom line, you should have told her before we went over there today. It’s been a week since we decided to move in together. You should have told her before today.”

“I was going to tell her when the time was right.”

“What, when she came over here and you weren’t living her anymore?”

He was being sarcastic and it was pissing me off even more. I struggled to keep my voice at a normal level. “No, but not today. Not how you did. Did you see her face? If she didn’t hate you before, she sure as hell does now.”

Now he was mad. He was clenching his fists and his jaw was clamped. Good. “I’m well aware that she doesn’t like me. You telling me that over and over doesn’t help anything.”

“For someone who’s so well aware of it, you sure don’t use any discretion when talking to her,” I said.

His hands flexed a few times before relaxing out of the fists and hanging by his side. I watched him swallow and tried to read the expression on his face but found it impossible. I stood there defensively, waiting for his response but after a minute of silence, I couldn’t take it anymore.

“Well?” I demanded.

“You know, the real issue here isn’t that I told your mom about us moving in together,” he said, his voice calm and I instantly knew he had decided in his mind that this fight was not going to end anytime soon. “You’re pissed off because I told her and you weren’t planning on her finding out for a long time. You weren’t planning on telling her today or ANYTIME in the near future that we’re moving in together.”

“I was-”

He talked over me, raising his voice so mine would be drowned out. “In fact, you weren’t even going to have to tell her because it was never going to happen, right, Cassie?”

My eyes narrowed at him. “What?”

“I ask you to move in and you say yes. But it’s never going to actually happen, is it? That’s just too much of a commitment for you. It doesn’t matter that you hardly ever spend any time over here, it’s too much of a security blanket for you to give up.”

I began to shake my head and opened my mouth to respond but I couldn’t get that far.

“Telling your mom wasn’t ever going to happen because moving out was never going to happen,” he repeated, like he always does when he’s trying to make a point. Like it somehow makes him more right or something.

I rolled my eyes and put my hands on my hips. “Why would I agree to move in with you if I wasn’t actually going to?”

“I don’t know the reasoning in your warped brain but I would think probably to appease me. You think that maybe if you agree to move in than I’ll stop bugging you about moving this relationship forward.”

“You’re being really stupid right now.”

“Am I? Then enlighten me.”

I took a step towards him and began to list off things on my palm. “For starters, this IS about you telling my mom because it was NOT your place to do so. Second, I don’t appease people by telling them I’ll move in with them. And third, you know what, you ARE constantly nagging me about moving this relationship forward and it’s really irritating.” His earlier words came back to me. “And I DON’T have a warped brain.”

He laughed, actually laughed, not only at my last comment, but at me. “Just admit it, Cassie. You don’t want to move in with me.”

The words left me before I could water them down. “FINE! I don’t! Are you happy?”

In his mind he must have believed that but maybe he was hoping I was going to deny it. The look on his face told me that I had actually surprised him with my words. “Yeah, I’m thrilled, Cassie. Thanks for the heads up.”

“What the hell was I supposed to do, huh, Justin?” I demanded. “You won’t lay off about our relationship and you always want more. If I hadn’t said yes you never would have given up on it.”

Just looking at him was pissing me off further and I turned to go to the kitchen just to get out of this situation. He wasn’t going to let it end at that and his voice stopped me mid stride.

“I guess I should have known better than to try and get you to commit to anything. The girl who couldn’t even commit to a first date for a month.”

I stopped and whipped around to face him. “Are you kidding me? Grow up, Justin. That was a year ago. Are you seriously that low on ammunition that you have to bring that up?”

“It sure applies to this. You can’t commit to a first date, you can’t commit to anything. You can’t commit to anything but work.”

“If you-”

“Oh, and of course, Kyle.”

My mouth dropped and my heart started thumping against my chest as my anger raised a hundred notches. “What?” I bit out.

“You heard me.”

Maybe if this was the first time Kyle Pitman had been brought into one of our fights I would be able to brush it off. But it’s like anytime we fight, even if it’s about something petty, Justin always has to bring Kyle into it. It’s like second nature to him.

“You know what, Justin? I’m not going to have this same fight with you over and over.” I turned to go to the kitchen, fully prepared to just leave it at that and let the unresolved fight be buried until the next time we go at it. But Justin wouldn’t let it go and he was hot on my heels.

“Don’t walk away just because you don’t have any good defense.”

“I don’t need a good defense!” I snapped, yanking open the cupboard and pulling out a glass. “You bring Kyle into every single thing and it’s old. GROW UP.”

“Kyle-”

“What do you want me to say? That I’m committed to Kyle? Well, newsflash, Justin! I work with him every single day so I kind of have to be. If you could get your head out of your ass, you might be able to just accept that.”

“Don’t even tell me all that you and him have is business.”

“We’re friends. And that is not a problem.” I slammed my glass on the counter but made no move to put anything in it. “This isn’t about Kyle. You can’t continue to bring him into every single little fight we ever have.”

“Everything always somehow comes back to him.”

“No, you MAKE everything come back to him. You know, I wouldn’t have ever gotten into this relationship if I knew what an insecure prick you can be.”

He laughed at me again. “You’re telling me to grow up and here you are calling me names? Take your own stupid advice.”

I had been fully prepared to have an adult fight. I really had. When we got home, I was going to get him to realize how dumb he had been to tell my mom about us moving in and that was going to be the end of it. But then, just like every single fight we had had the past few weeks, it had to turn into a fight about a million other things. And it was like he tried to get me fired up just so I’d blow up. When did our relationship turn into this?

“Just shut up! You know you’re wrong about telling my mom and so you have to bring all this other shit into this. For once, how about you just accept that you’re wrong.”

“This isn’t just about your mom. Fights with you are never just about one thing. And this is about how you can’t ever commit to anything.” He gave me a mocking look. “Except your business partner.”

I was too mad to take any kind of high road. “It’s pretty rich how you’re constantly coming down on me about Kyle when you’re the one with a million girls all over you in your videos and at every single public appearance.”

He snorted. “Oh yeah, Cassie. Go there. Yeah, real mature.”

I hit my hand on the counter. “It’s the same damn thing!”

“It’s different and you know it. Save your breath cause you’re just making yourself look stupid by talking this shit.”

A few angry tears fell from my eyes and I wiped them away quickly. He wasn’t going to win this by making me cry. “You’re such an asshole.”

He rolled his eyes and stalked out of the kitchen. I followed behind him and watched as he grabbed his jacket from where he had thrown it on the bench in the front hallway.

“You can’t just leave!”

He turned around. “Why the hell not? What’s the point in staying here while you deny anything wrong that you do and call me names. Every single fight we have is like this!”

“That’s not my fault!”

He laughed and shook his head as he put on his jacket.

“Stop laughing at me!” I cried, my voice raising into a yell. I wiped my eyes again.

“Then stop acting like a child.”

I fought to stop my chin from trembling as we stared at each other. I hate when he makes me feel like this. Nothing seems right in the world and he’s the cause of it. I know we used to have such good times together but it’s like those are such distant memories that I can’t even bring them to mind. “When did you become this person?” I whispered, not having the energy to yell anymore.

We're going down
And you can see it too
We're going down
And you know that we're doomed
My dear, we're slow dancing in a burning room

“You’re the one who’s changed,” he replied, his arms crossing over his chest. “You’re a completely different person than you used to be. All you want to do is nitpick at every little thing I do.”

I shook my head to try and stop his words but he continued.

“I can’t even breathe around you anymore without you jumping down my throat! Do you realize how exhausting it is to be around you?!”

I drew in a few shallow breaths. “If I’m so exhausting to be around, why did you ask me to move in with you?”

“I don’t know anymore. Maybe it was a last ditch effort to try and make things better between us. But obviously it’s the last thing you want.”

“You’re moving too fast. You always move too fast. I can’t handle it anymore! And I can’t keep having this same fight over and over!”

“Well what do you suggest then, Cassie? How do we fix this?”

More tears fell but this time I didn’t wipe them away. Instead I just hugged my arms around myself and stared at him.

He let out a long suffering sigh and shook his head. Only the sound of my broken breathing was heard in the room for a minute before he spoke, his voice laced with resignation. “Maybe we just need to finally admit that we can’t do this anymore.”

“This?”

“This. Us. You’re not happy. I’m sure as hell not happy. We’re just staying together because it’s comfortable and neither of us wants to admit there’s a problem. But I can’t take this anymore. We can’t do this anymore.”

His words sunk in and formed a heavy block in my stomach. “So that’s it then.”

“What else is there?”

Bits of anger flared up again that he was doing this to me. After all this time, he was just going to end it like this. “Then get out! Get out of my house!”

“Why would I stay?” he mumbled, taking the few steps to the door.

“I hate you!” I yelled, emotions taking over my brain. I just wanted to hurt him as much as he was hurting me. “GET OUT!”

“I’M LEAVING!” he yelled back and those were the last words he said before the door slammed behind him, rattling the pictures on the wall.

An angry scream escaped me and I whipped a throw pillow at the door but the squeal of tires on my driveway let me know that my target was gone and out of my life.

My dear, we’re slow dancing in a burning room

My name was being called and I turned away from one of the models in the show, Anna Andrieux, to see a reporter from some magazine. Putting on my game face, I allowed myself to be pulled to the side. I could do without the tape recorder that she was shoving in my face, but I kept my cool. Only an hour and fifty eight minutes until my body gets to meet those cool, smooth sheets. I can make it.

I have a handy ability to answer questions accurately and eloquently while my mind is elsewhere. Right now, I’m in the middle of some speech about my plans for the future but my eyes are wandering around the large backstage area trying to figure out exactly how many more of these people I’m going to have to talk to.

I was about to resume eye contact with the reporter so I wouldn’t come off completely rude but then my eyes caught sight of him.

I remember it well
The first time that I saw
Your head around the door
Cause mine stopped working

I had seen him in the front row when I had taken the final walk down the runway. With all the lights, I don’t know how I managed to pick out his form from all the people around but somehow my eyes had fallen on him. It was a surprise at first to see him at the show but then I realized it wasn’t that much of a stretch. He was getting into this business and word is that his show earlier in the week went pretty good. Just one more thing under his list of accomplishments. He’s like the King Midas of entertainment.

I was about to tear my eyes away from him when his landed on me. His stride stopped and he stood unblinking for a minute before he started again, this time in my direction. My eyes quickly slid back to the reporter just as she was wrapping it up and I smiled graciously, hoping to undo any damage I may have caused by the lack of eye contact we had shared during the short interview. The last thing I need is to have some magazine tell the world that I’m a bitch.

My eyes follow the reporter as she disappears into the crowd and when I move them forward again, they connect with his. He seemed to materialize out of no where and suddenly he’s right in front of me.

“Hi.”

After a fashion show, there’s generally a pretty standard group of people I talk to and I prepare myself for what I’ll say to the models and any reporters and such. But when someone new comes into the picture it completely throws me off. I was not expecting, nor prepared, to talk to this man and I felt some anxiety kick in.

I fight the urge to run my hands through my hair, a particularly annoying nervous habit of mine. Instead, I plaster my most winning smile on my face. “Hello.”

“It’s so great to meet you. I’m Justin Timberlake.”

A laugh escaped me. At a certain point of fame, I really think it’s unnecessary to introduce yourself because the person would have to be living under a rock to not know who you are. “I’m aware. I’m Ca-”

He cuts me off, which normally would irritate me but he did it so smoothly I hardly noticed. “Oh, I know. The show was great. I had to come back here and congratulate you.”

My smile turned completely genuine. “Thank you. Did you see the whole show?”

“I wouldn’t have missed it. I feel lucky just to get tickets to the show.”

I rolled my eyes playfully. “I’m sure someone like you would have no problem getting tickets.”

“Don’t be so sure. I’ve never had to work my connections so hard before.”

“Are you kidding me?” I laughed, my nerves causing the laugh to come out a little louder than intended. I inwardly winced.

A smile slid across his lips. “Cassandra Reyna’s fashion show seems to be one of the most exclusive shows of the entire week.”

Flattery really does get people everywhere. I could feel myself blushing and only hoped it wasn’t too obvious. “Well I hope it lived up to everyone’s expectations.”

“It was really incredible. You must have worked so hard.”

My shoulders dropped a bit. Just him saying how hard I worked reminded me of how exhausted I was. One hour, forty minutes. “It was quite a bit of work. But it’s worth it.”

“You obviously have a million people who want to talk to you tonight, but I’d love to get together with you for coffee and talk business.”

That surprised me but I kept that from my face. “Oh, um, sure.”

“Do you have time in the next few days? I’m sure your boyfriend must be wanting to spend some time with you.”

A smile slowly spread across my lips. Was he asking if I was single? “No boyfriend.”

He smiled, flashing his white teeth at me. “Well then I’d like to take back the coffee offer and change it to drinks and dinner.”

This guy was nothing like I had pictured in my mind. Usually when someone’s too bold it turns me off, but there was something about him that was drawing me in. “And talking business?”

“We can maybe squeeze that in somewhere.”

My smile widened and I let out a small laugh. “Well I’ll have to check my schedule...”

“Dinner at Carrabba’s around six?”

“I…I…” I tried to remember if I had anything tomorrow night. I’m almost positive there was something somewhere but the more I stared at him, the more I simply couldn’t remember. To hell with it. “Sure.”

He looked completely satisfied. “Great. I can pick you up-”

“I’ll meet you at the restaurant,” I quickly cut in.

It seemed to throw him but only momentarily. “Sure if that works better for you.”

There was almost an awkward moment of silence but someone calling my name saved us from dealing with that. He looked in the direction of the voice and then back at me.

“I’ll let you get back to everyone. Again, congratulations on the show.”

I smiled. “Thank you. And thank you for coming.”

“I’ll see you tomorrow at six?”

I gave a quick nod of the head. “Six,” I confirmed.

“I’ll give you my number,” he said, producing a card from his pocket and handing it to me. “Just in case you decide you’d like a ride to the restaurant tomorrow instead of going solo.”

That made me laugh and I was going to respond but before I had a chance, my name was called again, this time more urgently.

“I’ll see you tomorrow, Cassie.”

I opened my mouth to inform him that it’s Cassandra but he had already turned away and moved back into the crowd, leaving me standing there, a bit bewildered.

Justin Timberlake came into my life like a tornado-fast, unanticipated, and roaring. I guess I should have expected that he’d leave me a disaster in his wake.

You would think that a guy that’s been burned so many times by the opposite sex would be pretty cautious about getting even slightly involved with a girl. If I were smart, I would learn a hell of a lot more about a girl than her name before inviting her out to dinner. But I’ve never claimed to be smart and that is why I am sitting in Carrabba’s at a table in the back, waiting for Cassandra Reyna to join me.

The fact that I’m sitting here waiting for Cassandra Reyna causes me to shake my head slightly and laugh quietly. What the hell am I doing? I had wanted to see her show simply because I think her designs are awesome. I didn’t even know who she was or what she looked like. But then she had walked down the runway with her models at the end of the show and I was freaking spellbound. I had this mental image of her as being older and probably a little eclectic looking. I was definitely not expecting a tall, striking female my age or maybe a couple years younger. One look at her and I was done. Going backstage had been a whim and I’m damn glad I took it.

I probably shouldn’t get my hopes about this girl up too high. I don’t know a thing about her and we only talked for a couple minutes last night. Sure, she was pretty, but for all I know she could be dumb as shit. I was really hoping that wasn’t the case but I couldn’t really tell much about her from the few minutes we talked. I grilled Trace to see if he knew anything about her but he knew less than me. I knew I took a chance asking her out to dinner but it paid off. The easy part’s done. Now I’m just hoping she can actually make conversation.

I got to the restaurant a few minutes early so I’d beat her here and she wouldn’t have to wait. That’s right, my momma raised a good southern gentleman. But now it was almost ten after six and I’m beginning to get antsy. I hate waiting around for people. To me, that’s just a sign of disrespect if you can’t be on time. Especially if you don’t bother to call after I gave you my phone number the night before.

Thinking of that, I quickly check my phone to see if maybe I had missed a call but when I open it, only the date and time flash at me. I wish I had thought to get her number so I could call her and see where she is.

Draining the rest of my water, I lean back in my chair and begin to lightly tap my fingers on the table out of habit. Turning to my head to the left, I look out the window at the street on the other side and stare at the passing people and cars to distract myself. I can see myself waiting fifteen more minutes and then I’m out of here.

My fingers picking up the beat of the music playing in the restaurant, I sigh and wet my lips. This was probably a stupid idea anyways. I wasn’t after a one night stand so what exactly was this? I hadn’t really analyzed it that much last night. I had just turned off my brain and just started running my mouth to her. If I had really been watching myself, I would have just congratulated her and left. Asking her out to dinner was stupid. This is fashion week. She probably has a million things to do and doesn’t even have time for this. She probably said she’d come to dinner just to be polite. She probably-

“I am so sorry I’m late.”

I turn away from the window and my fingers came to an abrupt halt when I see her standing at the table. I smile and sit up straighter. “No worries.” I begin to push back my chair so I can get up and pull hers out for her but she beat me to it. As she situates herself across from me, I take the opportunity to look over her.

She could be late all she wanted if she was going to show up looking like this. She had on some kind of black shirt dress that was cinched at her waist, showing off a pretty perfect hourglass figure. It ended just above her knees, showing off the same great legs that I had seen last night on the runway. If being a designer ever fails for her, she could take up modeling. Damn, I don’t even care if she can’t carry a conversation. Staring at her all night will do.

“Have you been waiting long?”

“Not too long.” There’s no need to let her know about how anal I am with being on time.

“I got a phone call from my mom and she likes to talk.” She pulls her chair in a little closer to the table and smiles at me. “I must have made a horrible first impression.”

She’s got a really great smile. It’s infectious and I find myself returning it. “Seriously, don’t even worry about it. I didn’t mind waiting.” Okay, that’s a lie but she looks so good and I’m so glad she’s here that it kind of made the wait worth it.

She looks like she’s going to say something else but the waiter appears to take our drink orders before she can get anything else. She was good with the wine I wanted to get and that just increases my liking of her. A girl who can appreciate a good wine is good in my books.

“Have you already looked over the menu?” she asks, once we were again alone, as she opens it and begins to look through it.

I stare at her bent head. “Yeah. I’m thinking of getting spaghetti.”

She lifts her head to look at me, a playful glint in her eye. “A little boring, don’t you think?”

I chuckle. “What can I say? I like familiar things.”

“I’m feeling daring tonight. I’ll try something new.” She lifts her menu and shows it to me. “How do you say that?”

I raise my eyebrows as I read what she’s pointing to. “You’re asking the wrong person. I can barely speak English, let alone Italian.”

She pulls the menu back in front of her and continues to look through it. “Maybe I’ll just point to it then. I hate when you can’t say it and the waiter makes fun of you.”

The corners of my mouth lift. This girl was cool. “Can’t say that’s ever happened to me.”

“That you know of,” she replies her eyes on the menu as she turns the page. “Waiters do all sorts of nasty things.”

“Is that so?”

“I was a worked in a restaurant when I was in high school and trust me, you don’t even want to know the things that go on.” She closes her menu and puts it on the table and then makes eye contact with me again.

“Decided?”

“I think I’ll go with lasagna.”

“What happened to being daring, Cassie?” I laugh.

She looks like she’s going to say something but then instead smiles and smooth her hands over the top of the menu before saying, “Maybe another night.”

She’s interesting, that’s for sure. I glance over her once more. “So have you recovered from last night?”

“Hardly. I slept through most of today. I still feel a little out of it.”

I smile. “You don’t look out of it at all.”

She ran her hand through her dark hair that was hanging around her shoulders. “Maybe I’m starting to recover.”

“How long are you in New York for? Or are you from here?”

“I fly out Sunday morning. I live in Seattle.”

“Are you from there originally?”

“California actually. I grew up in San Francisco.”

“So why Seattle? Is there some kind of hopping fashion industry there that I don’t know about?”

She laughs and I relax a bit more. Great smile, great laugh. “Nothing compared to other places in the country. I’ve just grown attached to the city. Eventually I’m sure I’m going to need to move out to a place with a more prominent fashion industry.”

“There’s always LA.”

Her eyes examine me for a second and I’m just beginning to feel scrutinized before she speaks. “And where do you live?”

“LA.”

Her eyes twinkle and she laughs softly as she takes a sip of her wine. “Well how about that.”

“Seriously though. It’s a great place for a designer. A step away from New York, but I’m sure a step up from Seattle.”

“I’m sure.”

I lean back in my chair and take my own drink of wine, my eyes not leaving her face. There was something about her. She’s interesting and I’m intrigued. “You really should check it out sometime.”

“Eventually I will.”

The waiter appeared again to take our order and once he was gone, we fell into a good conversation. Like always, when I’m with someone I don’t know, I was worried about awkward silences but that didn’t really seem to be an issue. I asked her questions about herself and she asked me a few about myself although I think I hounded her with more questions than she did with me. I couldn’t help it though. I needed to get a good gauge on her.

What I did gather was that she was funny, smart, and interesting. And I also gathered that she was hot and had a lot going for her in the looks department. She’s what I would officially call the perfect package.

The two and a half hours we spent in the restaurant went by way too fast for me. I tried to draw it out longer but I could tell she was still tired from the previous day and probably wanted to go back to her hotel.

Parting ways, I wasn’t expecting a kiss or anything. I did manage to grab her number but that was it. It kind of sucked to see her get into her cab and watch it drive away. She was going back to Seattle in a couple days and that was that. There’s a good chance we’d never be seeing each other again and that kind of soured my previously elated mood. As I got my own cab, I tried to reason with myself that there were other hot, smart girls out there. I don’t need to pursue anything with Cassandra Reyna.

Problem is, I can really see myself falling for this girl.

There’s something about stepping into a Starbucks and ordering my drink that makes everything seem right in the world. I may be stressed out and wanting to just crawl into bed and sleep my life away but just saying ‘grande nonfat sugar free vanilla latte’ gives me a warm feeling inside. Things just don’t seem as bad when I’m holding that large cup of hot liquid.

alphabet You know you’re addicted to Starbucks when your day gets ten times better by just stepping into the shop. But when you live in such a rainy, slightly dreary city, it’s hard not to become addicted to it.

The big comfy chairs become available just as I get my drink and I quickly snatch them up and relax into the one facing the window. I take a few minutes to simply sit there and sip at my latte before pulling out my sketchbook from my purse that’s a little too large to even be called a purse and turning to a fresh page.

Thursdays are what I like to call my Starbucks days. I may stop and grab a coffee most other days of the week but on Thursday I make a point to come in and sit down and relax. Sometimes I’ll sketch, other times I’ll read the newspaper or even just people watch. I usually spend an hour or two here and then go to the gym for my kickboxing class. Follow that up with an hour with McDreamy and it turns into the best day of my week. I figure for how hard I work, I deserve at least one day.

I had just finished a rough sketch of a skirt and was trying to decide what type of fabric to use for it when someone sat down in the chair across from me, pulling me out of my designer zone. Startled, I looked up and smiled when I saw Hannah Webb sitting there, grinning at me.

“Fancy meeting you here.”

“Hey,” I said, resting my book on my lap. “What are you doing here?”

“My class got canceled so I have the rest of the afternoon free. What are you drawing?”

I passed her my sketchbook and picked up my latte. Leaning back in my chair, I sipped at my drink and stared out the window. It had started to rain again.

“Are you going to make this?”

“Maybe.”

She put the sketchbook on the table and leaned back in her own chair, crossing her legs. I watched her as she watched me.

“You seem more stressed out than you did before you went to New York.”

“Do I?”

“You sure do. Shouldn’t you be all relaxed now that you’re back home? Or did you get a bad review of your show?”

“No. No bad reviews.” I move my cup a bit, swirling the liquid inside and then take a long drink, the liquid warming my insides. “Everything I’ve read has been really good actually.”

“But you’re still stressed out.”

I sigh. “Completely.”

“Hold that thought, let me grab a drink, and then we’ll talk.”

I nod and smile as she gets up. In her absence, I go back to staring outside at the grey sky and falling rain. Just looking at it is making me cold and I burrow a bit deeper into the chair. On days like this, there’s nothing better than sitting inside with a good cup of coffee.

“Okay.”

I turn my eyes to Hannah as she sits back down across from me with her own drink.

“Spill. What’s the haps?”

I cross my legs and wrap both my hands around my cup. “Work is killing me.”

“But Fashion Week’s over and it went great, right?”

“Yeah. But that’s the problem.”

“I’m not following.”

“Everyone really seemed to love all my designs and suddenly there’s like this high demand for them. Susan wants me to open my own boutique instead of just having my clothes in other people’s stores.”

“But that’s a good thing, isn’t it?”

“It is but I can’t do it from Seattle. If I’m going to have my own store, it has to be somewhere where there’s a good amount of fashion in the area. And that’s not Seattle.”

“No. So you’re thinking you’re going to move?”

“I don’t really want to leave here. But it’ll help my line out so much if I have my own boutique.”

“Are you thinking New York?”

“New York’s too far away from everyone. Susan suggested LA. There’s an location on Rodeo Drive that I could get.”

Hannah’s face lit up. “Rodeo Drive? That would be so cool, Cassandra! You’ve got to do it!”

“I just don’t want to leave here.”

“You’d rather stay in rainy Seattle when you could go to sunny California and have a store on Rodeo Drive? Don’t be crazy.”

“I like it here.”

“Your family lives in California though,” Hannah reasoned. “You’d be closer to them.”

I laughed a bit. “I don’t always mind being far away from them. They’re a bit crazy.”

“Come on, you honestly can’t pass an opportunity like this up. Everyone loves your clothes and they want to see them. This is a huge step for your career!”

I lean my head back on the chair and stare up at the ceiling. “I know. I just didn’t think it would come this soon.”

“You just don’t want to leave because you hate change. You’re too comfortable here.”

I smile at the ceiling. This is the problem with having a best friend who’s getting her masters in psychology. Hannah always analyzes me and usually she’s right. “True.”

“When do you need to decide by?”

“Tomorrow. I have to put in a bid on the store by tomorrow morning.” I sigh and run a hand over my neck. “If I had more time this would be easier.”

“You just can’t let this opportunity slide by.”

I lift my head back up and look at her. “You really think I should do it?”

“You have to. You’ll be kicking yourself for the rest of your life if you don’t do this.”

I know everything she’s saying is right. But I’m still resistant to it. I don’t want to leave here.

Leaning forward in my chair, I run my hands through my hair and then drain the remainder of my coffee. I swear making big decisions gives me anxiety attacks. “I think I might need another latte.”

* * *

“You made the right decision.”

I had been repeating that to myself for the past hour. Every few minutes the words would exit my mouth and each time I said them it was like I thought that it would make me realize that my decision had been right. But each time I said them it felt more like I was trying to talk myself into it.

I have never made a decision this big before. Ever. I had thought the decision to move to Seattle six years ago was a tough one but it was nothing compared to this. This was my future that I had basically just sealed. There was no turning back. I now owned a spot on Rodeo Drive and I was moving to LA.

“You made the right decision.”

I spoke those words and squeezed my eyes shut tightly. I better have made the right decision. Otherwise I was officially screwed.

The sound of my kettle whistling made me crack open an eye and I stared at it for a second before letting out a deep breath and moving to take it off the element. I was hoping a cup of tea would calm my nerves. Who am I kidding though. I need a strong cup of coffee and I drank the last of my coffee this morning before I made the call to put my bid in. And now, four hours later, I can’t force myself to leave my apartment and go get some more. All I’ve got to work with is herbal tea, which isn’t going to cut it.

I poured the water into the pot and added a tea bag before leaving it to let it brew. My nerves had me wound tight and I couldn’t just stand in one place. Pacing the apartment seems like a good idea.

I had tried to get Hannah to come over and calm me down but she was in some seminar all day and couldn’t get out of it. And no one else will know what to say to help me so I’m left alone.

Pacing was working well for me until realization hit me and I stopped midstride. “I’m going to have to find a place to live out there…”

I realized opening my own boutique would involve moving to LA. I knew all that. But the actual thought of finding a place to live had never entered my mind. Where would I live? How would I find a place on such short notice? I’m going to have to get out there within a few weeks. How am I going to find a place to live and move all my things out there all by myself?

The problem with LA is that I don’t know anyone there. I know people all over the world but LA is that one spot where I have no connections. I used to know a guy who lived out there but he moved to Paris last year.

“There’s got to be someone,” I mumbled, running my hands through my hair. I’ve used so many models over the years and LA is full of models. There has to be someone.

I began to pace again but only made it a couple steps before stopping again. Wait. I had one connection in LA. If you could even call it a connection.

I’m not big on calling up people for favors when I don’t even know them. But I guess I had been taking risks all day that one more couldn’t hurt.

“I hate doing this stuff,” I mumbled as I grabbed my cell phone and began to scroll through the numbers in it. “I made the right decision though. I must have made the right decision. I made-”

“Hello.”

I froze up when I heard his voice, completely startled. Why did I expect it would go right to voicemail? It was silent for a second before I realized this wasn’t the way to go about this. I switched myself into professional mode.

“Is this Justin?”

“You got him.”

“Hi, it’s Cassandra Reyna. We met last week-”

“Hey, Cassie. How are you?”

Okay, so he remembers me. That’s a step in the right direction. “I’m fine. How are you?”

“Great. So what’s up?”

“I actually have a really big favor to ask you.”

“Fire away.”

He was being so easy going with this whole conversation and I felt like I was going to be sick. Did I mention that I really hate asking people for favors when I don’t know them? I sucked in a deep breath and decided to just spit it all out. “I’m opening a boutique on Rodeo Drive and I’m moving down to LA and I don’t know anyone in the city except for you so I was hoping you could put me in touch with a good real estate agent.”

His laughter came through the phone. “Whoa, take a breath.”

I relaxed a bit and smiled a bit. “Sorry. I’m a little wound up.”

“No kidding. Okay, so you’re moving to LA?”

“Yeah. Soon. I’m catching the red eye to LA tonight so I can find a place to move into. I’m hoping to be moved out there in a week.”

“Seems like a certain gentleman advised you to move to LA not too long ago.”

I let out a small laugh and relaxed a bit more. This wasn’t so bad. “He must have been onto something.”

“Rodeo Drive, huh? That’s something.”

“Yeah,” I said, my voice softening. “It’s something.”

“Alright well here’s the deal. I can give you the number for my real estate guy but you have to do something for me in return.”

I started to feel nervous again. Just when I thought this call would be easy. “What?”

“How long are you planning on being out here?”

“As long as it takes me to find a place.”

“I’ll hook you up with my real estate guy but you’ve got to promise you’ll hang out with me tomorrow night. We’ll go to a club or something.”

I began to smile. “I’m not really big on clubs.”

“Then we’ll go to a book reading or something.”

This time I laughed. “I’m also not eighty years old.”

I could almost hear the smile in his voice. “I’ll figure something out, alright? Just promise you’ll hang with me tomorrow night.”

I thought back to how much fun I had had with him at dinner and my smile grew a bit. “That can definitely be arranged.”

“Sweet. Hang on a sec and I’ll grab the number for you.”

I fiddled with a picture frame sitting on my coffee table as I waited. I was still completely stressed out at the sudden turn of events in my life and everything it entailed but it’s helping that I know someone in LA now. Fate must have been looking out for me and introduced us. I’d be screwed if I had to find a real estate agent myself. This guy was a life savior.

Once I got the phone number from Justin, I got off the phone with a promise to call him once I was in LA. I had a bit of an urge to keep talking to him but a look around my apartment reminded me I had to pack and be at the airport in four hours.

My tea sat waiting in the kitchen but just a look at it convinced me that I needed a much stronger shot of caffeine than that and I grabbed the phone again. With any luck, Hannah will be done her seminar and she can get some Starbucks and get her butt over here to help me pack.

“Have you even moved since I left this morning?”

I rolled my head to the side to see my cousin, Rachel, come into the room. “I got up to piss an hour ago.”

She rolled her eyes and dumped her plastic bag unceremoniously on my legs. “Thank you for that.”

I moved my legs a bit so the bag moved from my legs to the couch I was stretched out on. “What’d you buy?”

“Some vegetables. The stuff in your fridge is rotten. How long has it been in there?”

I shrugged. “I dunno,” I said through a yawn. “A while I guess.”

“You’re going to get sick if you don’t eat right,” she said in her most adult voice and then pushed my feet to the side so she could sit on the couch.

“You sound like Mom. Is she telling you to get me to eat my fruits and vegetables?”

“As a matter of fact, she is. And take vitamins. I bought you some and they still sitting on the counter unopened.”

“Yeah I forgot about those.”

“One of these days you’re going to get sick from how you treat your body.”

A groan escaped me and I shoved my foot into her hip. “You’re no fun when you try and be all responsible.”

“Get your disgusting feet off of me,” she replied, pushing at my feet again. “Have you even showered today?”

“As a matter of fact, I have, thank you.” I swung my feet onto the ground and sat up. Scrubbing my hands over my face, I yawned again. “What time is it?”

“Six o’clock. Are you planning on staying on this couch all night too?”

I laid my head on the back of the couch and stared up at the ceiling. “No. I’m waiting for Cassie to call me.”

“Cassie?”

“Cassandra Reyna.” Is it stupid that I feel cool just saying her name and letting Rachel in on the fact that I know her?

“Since when do you talk to Cassandra Reyna?”

I turned my head to give her a bored look like this was old news. “I went for dinner with her in New York.”

She didn’t look impressed. “Uh huh.”

“And she’s moving out here. She’s out here looking for a place to live. She called me yesterday to get Jerry Luther’s number.”

Rachel was now focused on the game show I had previously been watching on TV. “Oh.”

“And we’re going to hang out tonight.”

“Oh.”

Would it kill her to show a little interest in this? “She’s opening a store on Rodeo Drive, you know.”

She didn’t take her eyes off the TV but a smirk settled across her face. “Just let me know when you’re done gushing over her.”

I snorted and stood up. “You know, I didn’t even invite you over here.”

“Go put those vegetables in the fridge.”

Heaving a sigh, I grab the bag and go to the kitchen. It’s not like I have anything better to do.

Not that I’d admit it, but I’ve been waiting around all day for Cassie’s phone call. I know her flight didn’t get in until like four this morning and she probably crashed in her hotel before meeting with Jerry at nine and didn’t have a chance to call me. But it’s past six now and I’m getting anxious. I don’t want to seem overeager and call her since she did say she’d call me but I’m almost at that point. Seriously, all I’ve done all day is lay around and I can’t spend my night doing that. I need to get out of the house.

I’ve been sitting by my cell phone for six hours waiting for it to ring. But of course it’s as soon as I’m in the kitchen that it rings.

“Justin!” Rachel yells.

I didn’t pull my head from the fridge. “What?!” I yelled back.

“Phone!”

I yanked my head from the fridge and let out a few curses when my shoulder hit the door as I slammed it shut. I jogged through the house back to the den even though I knew my voicemail was going to kick in before I got there.

“Missed a call,” Rachel said when I made it to the room.

I grabbed my phone from the hand she had stretched above her head. “You could have just picked it up.”

“True, I could have.”

I rolled my eyes and flipped the phone open. I smiled when I saw the missed call was from Cassie and immediately hit the call back button. Raising the phone to my ear, I began to walk out of the room. It rang twice before her voice came over the line.

“Hello?”

“Hey. It’s Justin.”

“Oh hi.”

“Sorry I missed your call. I was in the other room.”

“That’s fine.”

“So how are you? You’re here, right?”

“Yeah. Sorry I didn’t call you when I got in but it was so early and I wanted to sleep before going house hunting.”

I wandered down the hall and into my office. “I figured. So how’d it go? Did you find any potentials?”

“Better than that. I bought a house.”

I raised my eyebrows. “That was fast.”

“I know. But I needed a place by next week and I kind of fell in love with it.”

“Where is it?”

She rambled off an address that was about fifteen minutes away from me and I smiled. Perfect. We weren’t going to be too far from each other. “That’s a good area of town,” I said, sinking into the leather chair behind my desk.

“It’s a really nice neighborhood. And it’s not too far away from where my store will be.”

“That’s good.” I propped up one leg on the desk and leaned the chair back. “So are you there now? Or are you at your hotel?”

“I’m actually at a hardware store getting paint.”

“Wow, you really waste no time. Do you already have possession of the house?”

“Yeah I didn’t think it would go through so fast but the people were anxious to sell it, I guess.”

“Are you going to paint all by yourself?”

“I was planning on it.”

I could hear a voice in the background and then her muffled voice responding. I waited patiently for her to come back on the line.

“Sorry. I’m just going through the register.”

“You got all your paint?”

“Yeah. Now I’m just going to have to find the time to paint.”

Balancing the phone between my shoulder and ear, I cracked my knuckles and stretched out my fingers. “We could do it tonight.”

“Tonight?” she questioned.

“Sure. You promised you’d hang out with me, remember?” Please let that still be the plan.

“I remember. But you want to paint?”

“Why not? Have you eaten?”

“Not since lunch.”

“I can pick up some Chinese or something and we can paint.”

“I didn’t really bring anything that I can paint in.”

“I’ll bring over a t-shirt. Come on, are you really going to pass up on free labor?”

A giggle came over the line. “I guess that would be stupid of me. Okay well that sounds good. What time do you want to do this?”

“I can come over whenever. I’m just sitting at home right now.”

“I’ll probably be back at the house in twenty minutes. Do you know how to get there?”

“Pretty sure. Chinese food okay with you?”

“That would be great.”

“Preferences?”

“Whatever you want is fine with me.”

I dropped my foot from the desk and stood up. “Well I’ll order it and then pick it up on my way over.”

“Sounds good.”

“I’ll see you in a bit.”

“Okay. Bye.”

“Bye.”

I couldn’t wipe the smile from my face as I left the room. I had been pretty sure I would see her tonight but now that I actually knew I was, my mood was pretty high. Spending the night with her is going to be great. Even if we’re painting, which is one of my least favorite things to do. If we’re alone together, there’s not going to be any interruptions and I can actually get to know her.

“What’s a good Chinese food place?” I ask Rachel when I found her in the kitchen.

She looked up from the newspaper. “I dunno. Don’t you have any flyers around here?”

I began to rummage through my stack of take out menus. “Do you have any old shirts around here?”

“No. Why?”

“I’m going over to Cassie’s new house to help her paint and she needs something to wear.”

“All I have here is my concert t-shirt from the Guns N’Roses concert and there’s no way I’m giving you that to paint.”

I pulled out a take out menu and opened it. “I’ll find one of my own.” I spread out the menu and then leaned over the counter, resting my forearms on the surface as I scanned the options.

“So is this like a painting date?”

I didn’t look up. I already knew if I did I’d find her smirking at me. “No. I’m just helping her out.”

“Since when do you offer to help someone paint? I thought you hated the smell of wet paint.”

“I’m just trying to help her out.”

“Sounds like you’re just trying to get in her pants.”

This time I did look up at her. “What would your mom say if she knew you said those types of things?”

“Probably the same thing your mom say if she knew half the things that come out of your mouth.”

My eyes returned back to the menu. “At this point, Cassie and I are friends, if that. Acquaintances. I don’t sleep around with people I don’t know.”

“So do I get to meet her?”

“Why would you get to meet her?”

“Well if you’re interested in her then you should let me meet her. I’ll give you my honest opinion about her.”

“That’s what I’m afraid of. You’re too honest sometimes.”

“You say that like it’s a bad thing.”

I smirked. “I’m gonna order some food to take over to her place. Do you want me to get anything extra for you?”

“Nope. I’m leaving right away. We’re still going to the gym tomorrow, right?”

“Yeah but later in the day. I don’t know how long I’ll be out tonight.”

“Probably all night if you get your way, right?”

Sometimes it’s not even worth responding to her comments. This was one of those times. “See you later, Rach,” I call over my shoulder as I leave the kitchen, her laughter echoing behind me.

I ordered the food and then went upstairs to my room and changed my clothes and five minutes later I was on my way out of my house. It was close to seven once I had picked up the food and made my way to Cassie’s house. Pulling into the driveway, I parked beside a rental car.

The house wasn’t huge but it looked nice from the outside. Lights were on inside and it looked inviting. She had made a good choice.

I walked up the front steps and, balancing the bag of food in one arm, I rang the doorbell. Only a few seconds passed before I heard the lock turning.

This was the first time I had seen her dressed down and it was a cute look on her. She had her hair pulled back into a high ponytail and had on a white t-shirt and a pair of jeans, her toes poking out from under the denim. There was minimal makeup on her face and she looked pretty and fresh.

“I come bearing food,” I said, holding up the bag as I stepped into the house.

Her face broke into a smile. “Great. I’m so hungry. The kitchen is in the back.”

I followed behind her, smiling a bit as I watched her ponytail bounced with each step she took. “I might have gotten too much food. I didn’t know what you’d like.”

“I love all Chinese food. I’m sure we can manage to eat it.”

We got to the kitchen and I put the bag on the counter. “So do we eat first or do I get a grand tour?”

“Mmm…quick tour and then we’ll eat,” she decided and then started to wander out of the kitchen. Realizing this was the tour, I quickly fell into step beside her.

“The whole place seems really weird right now because it’s so empty and white in here,” she said as we walked through the bare dining room and living room. “I’m hoping once I get some paint on the walls and all my furniture moved in it’ll feel more normal.”

“Where are you living right now?”

“I have an apartment in Seattle. It’s a pretty good size but I don’t think I have enough stuff to fill the house with. I might have to go furniture shopping when I get out here for good.”

“When’s that going to be?”

“If all goes right, probably sometime next week.”

We climbed the stairs to the upper level. “That’s so fast.”

“I know. Everything’s moved so fast the past couple days that it all feels like a blur. I can’t even believe I’m here right now.”

“Well I for one am glad you’re here,” I said as we reached the top of the stairs. “It’s going to be great with you living in LA.”

She turned to give me a half smile. “I hope so.”

I followed her into the large bedroom at the end of the hall. “Is this the master suite?”

“Mm hmm. Isn’t it nice?”

“Yeah, it is. It’s pretty big.”

“I know. But that’s perfect. I have a big canopy bed and a big dresser so I need a big room. My room in Seattle is kind of small and it’s so cramped.” She looked around the room and wrapped her arms around her midsection. I had seen her take that position a couple times since I’ve met her. It must be a security thing.

“So yeah, that’s basically it. The outside needs some work but I’m not going to worry too much about that right now.”

I nodded and was going to suggest my landscaper when her stomach growled loudly, breaking the silence of the room. She blushed a bit and I began to laugh.

“Maybe we should eat before you die of starvation.”

She let out a small laugh and pressed her palm to her cheek. “The tour’s basically done anyways. Unless you really want to see the linen closet.”

I led the way out of the room and downstairs. “I can use my imagination.”

Once we were in the kitchen, both of us realized at the same time that we had neither dishes nor anywhere to sit. So we ended up in her dining room, on the carpeted floor, passing the boxes of Chinese food back and forth between each other. And you know, there was something about sitting in the empty room on the floor across from her and talking over take out that was perfect.

That’s one of my tests. If I can have a good time out on the town with a girl, that’s great. But if I can have just as good of a time sitting around and doing nothing, that’s even better. Dinner at Carrabba’s was amazing, but this was better. She seemed a bit more relaxed and was smiling and laughing. At one point I said something that must have been funny and she burst out laughing and a snort escaped her. She was completely embarrassed but I thought it was cute. My mom does the same thing when she really gets laughing and I’ve always thought it was great. My mom was really going to love Cassie.

I had to stop myself at that point because I was getting way ahead of myself. I needed to get through this night first before I start planning meetings between Cassie and my mom. That can definitely wait a month or two.

We talked for a good hour before she mentioned painting. I had kind of been hoping she’d forget about it and just decide to hire someone to do it. I mean, really, why waste your time painting when you can get someone else to do it? But hey, I told her I’d come over and help her and I try to keep my word when possible.

Cassie was basically swimming in my t-shirt but she still managed to make it look good by tying the loose fabric in a knot on her lower back. This would be why this girl is a fashion designer. She can make anything look good.

She had gotten this light blue color for her living room and we went to work on painting that. After ten minutes I was already tired to it but she seemed to be having fun and we were having some good conversation so I dealt with the tediousness of painting the wall.

I like to think I’m pretty good at reading people and if I’m reading Cassie right, she’s interested in me. She’s flirting a little and I’m flirting right back. I still haven’t really sat down and figured out what I’m wanting with her, but I have figured out that I have the tiniest of crushes on her and she’s pretty amazing. And really, if I want to start something up with someone, she would be a good option. Everything about her fits my criteria.

The room took longer to paint than either of us had anticipated and it was close to eleven by time we finished the first coat. I have to admit, it looked pretty good for a couple of amateurs.

“I really wasn’t sure about this color in the store,” Cassie said as she surveyed the room, her hands on her hips. “But it looks really good on the walls.”

“It’s a good choice,” I agreed. “Very fresh and spring like.” I went over to stand beside her. “Could always be an interior decorator if this whole fashion thing falls through.”

She bumped her hip against mine. “Don’t say that. You’ll jinx me.”

I laughed. “I don’t think you have to worry about being jinxed at this point, Miss Rodeo Drive.”

She smiled and left my side to go get the paint supplies. “You’re going to give me a big head if you keep saying that.”

I helped her carry the brushes to the kitchen. “So have you figured out which day you’re going to have movers get your stuff down here?”

“I think I’ll try for next Friday. I’d like to put it off longer but I have to be here for the remodeling of the store and that’s scheduled for Monday.”

“You should give me a call when you have a set date and I can help you unpack and all that shit,” I said as I turned on the faucet and washed off the roller brush, the water turning blue as it swirled down the sink.

“I might just take you up on that.”

“And I can give you a good tour of the city.”

“Sounds like a plan.” She came up beside me and reached in the sink to wash off a brush. Her hand slid against mine and I looked over at her, studying her face. I had come over here tonight mostly to see if we worked well together. We had had a good time at Carrabba’s but I wanted to see if I could get to know the real girl. And I feel like after tonight I got a glimpse of it. The way she talked and the things she said reminded me of myself and I really liked that.

While her eyes were cast down toward the sink, I took the opportunity to really study her profile. She’s not just pretty, she has this classic beauty about her. She almost has an Audrey Hepburn look about her. She just has the kind of face I could stare at all day and not grow bored of.

She must have felt my stare because her eyes cut to me so suddenly that I couldn’t even play it off that I wasn’t watching her.

“What? Do I have something on my face?”

I was about to make up some excuse when I smile spread across my face. “Actually, you do.”

Her hand immediately went to her cheek. “What?”

I couldn’t help but laugh a bit. “You have some blue paint on your nose.”

Her cheeks darkened slightly. “I do?”

She looked completely embarrassed and the fact that she was blushing was cute. Still laughing, I reached for a paper towel and wet it. “Hold still.”

Her brandy colored eyes stare at me as I gently rub the paper towel over the tip of her nose and I can’t help but stare back at her. There is an obvious connection here and there’s no point denying it anymore. The hand holding the paper towel slowly falls to my side and we’re left looking at each other. Figuring I won’t get an opportunity as perfect as this anymore, I lean in for the kiss. It would have been perfect but right before our lips met, she pulled her head back.

Ouch. There’s an ego bruiser for you.

I jerked my head back. “I’m sorry,” I quickly said, hoping my embarrassment wasn’t showing. Not to sound too cocky, but it isn’t often I get rejected like this.

Cassie bit down on her bottom lip. “It’s okay.”

“No, I shouldn’t have done that. I just misread the situation.”

She looked down to the sink and then back up at me. Her cheeks were still a bit flushed. “No, it’s just I have this thing.”

“Thing?”

“I don’t kiss anyone until I’ve known them for at least three weeks.”

That was the last thing I expected her to say and all I could do was stare at her. After a moment of silence, she looked to the side again.

“It’s stupid.”

I quickly jumped in. “It’s not stupid. I just wasn’t expecting you to say that.”

“It’s just this thing…”

“It’s completely respectable.”

She managed a small smile and then turned back to the sink to continue to rinse off the brushes. I leaned my hip against the counter, facing her. In my head I did some quick math.

“So the first time we met was last Saturday. So we’ve known each other for officially a week.”

A smile quickly came to her lips but when she looked up at me, she had a straight face. “That’s right.”

“So March third will be the date when we have known each other for exactly three weeks.”

She rested her palms on the edge of the sink and turned to look at me. “That would be correct.”

I smiled and raised my eyebrows. “Just making an observation.”

She laughed softly and then went back to the brushes. “I see.”

So we don’t kiss for two more weeks. That’s not so bad…Okay, it kind of sucks but I can deal with it. Anticipation always makes things better.

The paint brushes were soon clean and once the water was off, she turned to me. “So I don’t want to come across completely rude, but I need to go to bed. It’s been a really long day.”

“Hey, completely understandable. You’re driving back to your hotel?”

“Yeah.”

I kind of still wanted to just hang out but the poor girl looked like she was about to pass out. Taking the initiative, I started towards the front door and she followed.

“Thanks so much for helping me paint.”

“It was no problem. It was great to hang out with you.”

She gave me a smile. “Yeah, it really was. And I’m definitely going to take you up on that offer to help me get settled in here next week.”

Perfect. “Just give me a call when you have the dates figured out and we’ll make it happen.”

“Great.”

We were in that slightly awkward moment at the end of a night when there was the question of what the next move should be. Deciding to take a risk, I stepped forward to hug her. She accepted it warmly and some relief went through me. I don’t think I could take much more rejection tonight.

She felt really good to hug. Her body fit into mine perfectly, her head coming just up to my shoulder. I pulled away after a second, but noted in my head that she hadn’t made any move to back away. Looking at her face, I found her cheeks again flushed.

I risked my next words. “So I understand your kissing thing, but where are we on a kiss on the cheek?”

She wet her lips and smiled. “I think that would be okay.”

Returning the smile, I leaned forward and brushed my lips against her warm cheek softly and fleetingly. She was still as I pulled back and opened the door.

“I’ll talk to you later.”

I took one last glance over my shoulder as I left the house and saw her pressing her hand to her cheek while she closed the door. A grin spread across my face. I may not be able to kiss her, but I can definitely secure myself into her life without it. And I think that kiss on the cheek may have just done it.

I always thought my apartment in Seattle was an okay size if not a bit on the small size. But now, with all my possessions on the way to California, the place had never seemed so huge. I feel like if I were to say something, my words would echo through the rooms.

I don’t even know how I managed to get all my things packed up in six days. I came home from LA on Sunday and immediately started the task. Hannah had been a huge help. Whenever she wasn’t in class, she was over, helping me sort through my things and get everything ready to go. And then, in true best friend form, she had arranged for a big farewell party last night at her place that had gone until well into the early morning. I’m still recovering from it and the thought of the drive to LA that awaited me was not appealing. But it had been worth it to have the night with my friends.

I’m trying to not concentrate too much on the fact that I’m leaving all my friends and everything that is familiar behind. I think if I do that, I might have a slight panic attack. California isn’t completely unfamiliar to me since my mom lives in San Francisco and I’ve gone down there to visit her a few times over the years. But that’s different from LA and neither place is Seattle and Seattle is what I’m used to.

“I’m really going to miss you.”

Those are an awful set of words. I turn to my left to see Hannah standing beside me and sigh. “I’m going to miss you too. I still can’t believe I’m leaving.”

“I know.” She puts her arm around my shoulders and squeezes me. “But you’re going to do so good in LA.”

“I hope so.”

“I know so.”

“You’re going to come visit me, right?”

Lifting her hand from my shoulder, she hits me in the head lightly. “Don’t be a turd. Of course I’m going to come visit you. You know how much I love road trips.”

I smile. “I’m going to try and come back a lot and see you guys.”

“You say that now but you’re going to be so busy down there that I bet you won’t have any extra time.”

“I’ll find time.”

“Are you going to get together with Justin once you get down there?”

Justin. The fact that I know he’s in LA is making this move a little bit easier. I don’t exactly know the status of our relationship but being around him is a breath of fresh air. If it wasn’t for my three week rule, I would have made out with him all night long on Saturday. Damn that three week rule.

“That’s the plan. He says he’ll help me unpack.”

“A man who is willing to do some physical labor for you,” Hannah sighs. “Better scoop up that hot commodity.”

When I had gotten back from my weekend in LA, I had told Hannah all about my night with Justin. I played it off a little bit though and I don’t think she gets that I’m a little bit into him. She keeps joking about me and him being together and I’ve been joking along with her. I figure that if something actually happens in the next couple weeks I’ll get to shock her with it and that’ll be a fun time.

“I just might,” I say, two thirds joking and one third a little bit serious. Who am I kidding? He’s hot and charming and funny. You can only go downhill from there.

“We shouldn’t have kept you out so late last night. You look tired.”

“I’m not that tired. I have a headache though.” I run my hands through my hair. “I just feel kind of gross.”

“You’ll have to hit up all the Starbucks on the way to LA.”

I smile. “Obviously. What do you take me for, Hannah?”

Laughing, she bumps her shoulder against mine. Her laughter slowly fades out and then we’re left in silence. It was a nice, comfortable silence but I had to eventually break it.

“I need to go.”

“Yeah. You have a full day of driving. How far are you going to go today?”

“As far as I can,” I say as I grab my purse from where it sat by the door.

I kept the radio off as I drove away from the apartment. I hate leaving Hannah and all my friends and everything that I’m comfortable with. I know it’s for the best but that just doesn’t make it any easier. And this pounding headache is doing nothing to motivate me to do this two day drive to LA. At this point I’m wishing I had just taken a flight there and gotten my car shipped but it’s too late to do that now.

I got my coffee from a Starbucks on the outskirts of the city and sipped my latte as I watched Seattle disappear in my rearview mirror. It was only after I was outside Seattle and on a long stretch of highway that I turned on the radio and put my cruise control on, settling in for the next thousand miles.

* * *

My toilet works. After throwing up in it five, yes five, times since I got here at eleven this morning, I can definitely say that it has good water pressure and the self cleaner in it works just great. Of course, it’s hard to really appreciate those things when you feel like you’re dying.

Sometime after leaving Seattle, my headache turned into more of a body ache and I started getting chills. By time I stopped at a hotel at ten that night, I felt like shit but figured it was from driving all day. I’m not quite sure how I managed to make it the remaining four hours this morning feeling as bad as I did. I felt worse and worse every single minute in the car. Thankfully, the nausea didn’t start until I had arrived at my house and was near a toilet. Small favors.

I reach up my hand to flush the toilet and stay slumped on the tile floor as the water swirls down the bowl. This is worse case scenario right now. I’m sure this is just some horrible case of the stomach flu but I don’t even have a doctor here to go to and make sure. And there’s no way I’m going to sit in the ER for ten hours just to see a doctor.

Staying on the floor by the toilet seemed partly appealing just to save me later trips to the bathroom but I was so cold and I knew I’d be more comfortable in my bed even though I was working with just the bare mattress and a blanket I had found in the first box I opened. I’d probably feel a whole lot less rotten if I just had my bed made up but there was no way in hell that I was going to search through the boxes littering my room for all my linens. Not while I’m feeling like this.

I crawl back into bed and just lay there thinking of how incredibly horrible this is. I’m supposed to be at the store in two days getting everything ready and at this point, I can’t see myself ever feeling well enough to get out of bed. I couldn’t have gotten sick at a worse time.

I don’t even know why I thought it would be a good idea to answer my cell phone when it started vibrating from the pocket of my hoodie. If I had been smart, I would have just let it go to voicemail and stayed wallowing in my own misery. But something inside me made me pull it out and press it to my ear.

“Hello?” Ugh, I sound horrible.

“Cassie?”

“Yeah.”

“It’s Justin. Are you in LA?”

“Mm hmm.”

“Are you alright? You don’t sound great.”

I shut my eyes and press the side of my face into my pillow. A wave of nausea rolls through me and I take a few deep breaths, willing the contents of my stomach to stay inside.

“Cassie? You alright?”

“I’m a bit sick.”

“With what?”

“Stomach flu I think.”

“Oh that sucks. Have you gone to the doctor?”

“I don’t have a doctor down here.”

“You sound horrible.” He pauses. “How about I come over? You shouldn’t be all alone.”

The last thing I want is for anyone to see me like this. “I’ll be okay.”

“You sound horrible,” he repeats. “It wouldn’t be right if I just left you there all alone if you’re really sick. I can come over and take you to a doctor.”

His sympathetic voice was causing feelings of self pity to rise in me. I try to push it aside. “I don’t want to go to the doctor.”

“If you’re not going to go to the doctor than I should come over. I’ll feel a lot better if I know you’re not just sitting there alone.”

I swallow, cringing at the bad taste in my mouth. “You really don’t have to, Justin.”

“It’s not problem. I’m going to leave right now. I’ll be over in fifteen minutes, okay?”

He hardly gives me a chance to agree before hanging up. A groan escapes my mouth as I drop the phone on the mattress beside my head. I’d rather just be here alone and ride this out but I couldn’t stand being on the phone arguing with him anymore. It was taking too much strength.

If I could just fall asleep it would make things so much easier. But the nausea and headache were preventing me from that saving grace. It’s pure torture to just lay here feeling like this and not be able to do anything about it. I never get sick and I’ve forgotten just how bad it can be. What did I do to deserve this?

After twenty minutes passes and I begin to think that maybe he had changed his mind about coming over here. Why would he want to be around someone who’s sick anyways? It’s not like he’s my husband or anything and it’s his duty to nurse me back to health. He had absolutely no obligation to me so why would he even bother coming over?

I was actually starting to believe that when my doorbell rang. I open my eyes and blink a few times to clear them as the ring echoed through the house. I don’t want to get up at all. The idea of moving seems torturous. But I can’t just leave Justin standing outside either.

With a cringe and a small moan, I pull myself into a sitting position and rest there for a minute, taking a few deep breaths to calm my stomach. Praying that I won’t throw up again, I stand and carefully make my way to the stairs.

Changing altitude when you’re nauseous, even if it’s even going down some stairs, has got to be one of the worst things. By time I reach the last step, I have to stop and take a few more deep breaths, dropping my chin down to my chest. I would have stayed like that for a few minutes but the doorbell rings again and I have to answer it. It takes me another minute to get to the front door and in that time, he’s already knocked on the door. He’s a bit impatient.

“You had me worried. You weren’t answering,” he says the moment I have the door opened.

“Sorry,” I say softly and step back so he can come in. “But really, you shouldn’t have come all the way over here.”

He takes off his shoes and shuts the door before his eyes rise to me and he really examines me. “Wow, you really are sick. You weren’t kidding.”

If I had more strength, I’d roll my eyes. Why would I kid about being sick? “No.” Feelings of nausea go through me again, this time more intense, and I shut my eyes briefly. “I need to go lay down.”

“Of course.”

I turn to go back upstairs but that movement is too much for my stomach to take and before I can do anything, vomit is rising in my throat. Lucky for me, there’s a bathroom off of the front hallway and I manage to get there just in time. I’m crouched on the floor, gagging into the toilet when I hear Justin come into the room. He squats down beside me, his knee brushing against my back and his hands gather my hair and pull it back from my face.

I feel horrible and sick and now I’m also completely embarrassed. I don’t like throwing up in front of my own mother, let alone a guy I have a crush on. Throwing up is disgusting and gross and he’s here watching it.

I changed my mind. Being sick in LA wasn’t the worst case scenario. Being sick in LA and Justin seeing me at my worst? This has officially become the worst case scenario.

When Cassie said she was sick, I expected that she was probably run down from the trip and had a headache or something. Maybe a little nauseous from all the driving. I didn’t expect her to answer the door looking like death had warmed over her and for her to be sprinting to the bathroom within a minute of opening the door. Sure, she sounded bad on the phone, but I wasn’t expecting this.

“Are you okay?” I ask quietly as she reached up and flushes the toilet.

She rests her cheek on the arm that is laying on the toilet seat. Her eyes are closed and her cheeks are red. A small moan escapes her lips but she doesn’t say anything.

“I should take you to see a doctor.”

Her eyes flutter open and then shut. “No,” she says softly. She wets her lips and then raises her head. “I’ll be okay. I just have to lay down.”

I let her hair drop back around her shoulders and put my hands on her arms to help her as she gets up off the floor. I get the feeling that she doesn’t want me to see her like this but I can’t just leave her here all alone while she’s so sick. My mom would kill me if she ever found out.

I feel even worse for her when we reach her room upstairs. I know that she just got here this morning but for some reason I didn’t think her room would be so bare. There are boxes stacked on the floor and a few random pieces of furniture scattered throughout the room. A large bed is in the center of the room but it isn’t made and only a pillow and a thin, crumpled blanket lay on it. This is not the kind of bed you want to be sleeping on when you’re sick.

I stop a few feet into the room. “You don’t have any sheets or anything?”

She pulls away from me and moves to her bed. “They’re all in one of the boxes.”

I watch as she crawls onto the mattress and then I go to the bed. I help her pull the blanket around her. “Do you need anything?”

She shakes her head and then lays it on the pillow. “No.”

She looks so miserable and my heart goes out to her. “Are you sure?”

“You don’t have to stay here,” she mumbles and shuts her eyes. “I just need to sleep.”

“I grew up in the south and I’d get my ass whopped if my momma ever found out that I left a girl all by herself when she was this sick.”

A smile briefly graces her lips before disappearing. “Just don’t feel like you have to.”

“I don’t.” I brush the back of my hand over her forehead feeling just how warm she is. “You should sleep and if you’re not feeling better by time you wake up, you really should go to a doctor, alright?”

She doesn’t respond or open her eyes and I let my hand linger against her hairline for another second before withdrawing and straightening. Once I’m out of her room and the door is shut behind me, I pull out my cell phone. I generally don’t take care of people when they’re sick and I don’t know what I can do for her. I need to call the expert for this.

“Hello?”

“Hey, Mom.”

“Hi, hun. How are you?”

“Good. You?”

“I’m good. What are you up to?”

“You remember me telling you about Cassie Reyna?”

“The designer? Yes.”

I walk away from Cassie’s closed door and slowly walk towards the stairs. “She got into LA this morning and I’m over at her house. She’s really sick.”

“What kind of sick?”

“She says it’s the stomach flu. I got here and she threw up for like ten minutes.”

“Oh, poor girl.”

“Yeah. She’s upstairs sleeping right now.”

“Has she seen a doctor?”

“No. She just got into the city a couple hours ago. She doesn’t want to go to a doctor. I said if she doesn’t feel better when she wakes up she should go though.”

“You’ll take her.”

It was a statement, not a question and I smile. “Of course.”

“Good boy.”

“But I just don’t know what I should do for her. I don’t know what I can do to help her feel better.”

“There’s only so much you can do when someone has the flu. Make sure she’s comfortable, keep her hydrated. Maybe make some dry toast to see if she can keep it down.”

“Okay.” I walk into the kitchen and over to the fridge. I don’t know what I was expecting but some realization hits me when I see the empty shelves. “She doesn’t even have any food or anything here.”

“Well I guess not if she just moved there.”

“I feel so bad for her, Mom. I took her upstairs to her room and she doesn’t even have her bed made. All her stuff’s still in boxes.”

My mom makes a tsking noise. “Poor girl. There’s nothing worse than being in a strange place away from everyone you know when you’re sick.”

“I know.”

“See if you can find some sheets and blankets for her and once she wakes up, make her bed. Sleeping on a bare mattress is not going to do anything to make her feel better.”

“Yeah,” I say and then hoist myself onto the counter. Switching my phone to my other ear, I let out a sigh. “I don’t really know what to do while she’s sleeping. The place is filled with boxes and that’s it. Maybe I should unpack some of her stuff. I offered last week and she said I could help her unpack.”

“Don’t do that now. I’m sure she doesn’t want you going through her things while she’s sleeping.”

The idea hadn’t sounded appealing anyways. “I guess.” I swing my legs out and let them lightly bounce against the wood of the cabinets below me. “Have you decided when you’re coming out here yet?”

“I was thinking early next month. I was looking at the second to the ninth. So check your schedule and then get back to me if those days are good for you.”

“Okay.” It’s quiet as I stare at the pattern of the tiled floor. “Maybe I’ll go to the store and see if I can find some medicine for Cassie.”

“Sounds like a good idea.”

“I’ll call you later about those days.”

“Sure. Tell Cassie I hope she feels better.”

“I will. Talk to you later.”

“Sure. Love you.”

“Love you too.”

* * *

The four hours of sleep did wonders. Not to say that I don’t still feel like shit when I open my eyes but at least the headache is gone and my stomach isn’t hula dancing inside of me at quite the intensity as it was before.

The blanket covering me is doing nothing to keep me warm and I curl my body into a smaller ball as I lay there. I know I’ll feel better if I get up make my bed but I really don’t think I can expel that kind of energy at this point.

I would just keep laying there and hope for more sleep but my mouth is dry and there’s a bad taste in it and I can’t ignore it. Praying that my stomach will cooperate, I slowly pull myself into a sitting position. I have to stay sitting in that position for a minute but I’m able to keep the nausea down to a minimum. Maybe this means the worst is over. I can only hope.

In the bathroom, I run my hands under cold water and splash some on my face before cupping my palm under the faucet and drinking a bit. With no towels unpacked yet, I use the front of my hoodie to dry my face and then raise my eyes to the mirror. I look really, really bad. With the circles under my eyes, I look like I needed to sleep for another week. With my schedule this week, though, that isn’t a possibility. I’m just praying I’m better by tomorrow morning. I have to be at the store for nine o’clock.

The sound of someone on the lower level of my house causes me to freeze before things start coming back to me and I remember that Justin is probably still here. I forgot that he came over. I actually don’t know why he’s still here. I’ve been sleeping for four hours and if he’s been here the whole time…what has he been doing?

I need to go lay down again but even the short distance from my bathroom to my bed seems too far. Propping my hands on the edge of the counter, I drop my head down and squeeze my eyes shut. After a few breaths, I lower myself into a squat and rest my forehead on the wooden cabinet.

“Cassie?”

Justin’s voice is quiet but with the house so quiet, I hear it even from in the bathroom. I suck in a breath and then answer. “Yeah?”

I can hear him come in my bedroom door and walk through my room. A second later, he appears in the doorway.

“I heard you get up,” he says. “How are you feeling?”

Turning, I slump down completely on the floor and lean back against the cabinet. “Sleeping helped.”

He squats down beside me and puts his hand on my forehead. The coolness of it feels good and I shut my eyes. “You’re still really warm. I can still take you to the doctor.”

I shake my head and his hand pulls away. “No.”

He gives me a half smile. “You’re really stubborn, you know that?”

I try to return his smile but I don’t think it works too well. “I know.”

“Have you thrown up again?”

Him saying that reminds me how he saw me throw up and embarrassment spreads through me. “No.” I can’t help but let a small groan escape me and drop my head down.

“What?” he asks.

“I can’t believe you’re seeing me like this. I’m like at my worst right now.”

I feel him sit down beside me but I don’t look up. He’s quiet for a short moment before speaking. “Well I guess that just means that it only gets better from here.”

I can’t help but smile a bit at that and shake my head. “I hope so.”

“And your worst really isn’t that bad.”

If I had more strength I’d probably roll my eyes. The guy has to hold my hair back for me while I’m throwing up and he says that isn’t bad? Sometimes it seems like he’s almost a little too smooth for his own good. At this point, I won’t be at all insulted if he says I looked like crap.

I raise my head and rest it back against the wood behind me, shutting my eyes. “You didn’t have to stay,” I mumble.

“I said I would,” he states simply.

I open my eyes as he picks up my hand and squeezes it before setting it back on my lap. “Someone as famous as you must have better things to do with his time than sit around an empty house for hours.”

“I didn’t just sit around for hours. I went to the grocery store and then I finished the second coat of paint in the living room.”

I turned my head to look at him. “You did?”

He nods.

He is a breed of man that I have never met before. I didn’t know they made guys this perfect in real life. “Thank you.”

“You’re welcome. And I was thinking that you should come over to my house and sleep there tonight. You shouldn’t be by yourself when you’re sick.”

This is where I draw the line. It’s one thing for him to be over here but I can’t intrude on his life over the stomach flu. “Thanks for the offer but no thanks.”

“But you’re sick.”

“And it’s not going to kill me. It’s really nice of you to offer but I can’t.”

“But, Cassie-”

“That stubborn part of me isn’t easily swayed.”

He shuts his mouth and then smiles. “Fine. But I can’t promise that I won’t stop by here in the morning to see how you’re doing.”

“If all goes well, I’ll be at the store in the morning.”

His eyebrows raise. “That can’t be pushed back? You’re sick.”

“I’ll push it back if I have to but I’m hoping I won’t have to.” I sigh. “We’ll see.”

It’s quiet for a second and I turn my head to look at him. He gives me a smile and then lifts his hand up and places the inside of his wrist on my forehead.

“You’re still pretty warm.”

“I still feel pretty horrible.”

“Are you okay to get up? You’ll feel better if you’re not sitting on the bathroom floor.”

“Yeah…I think so.”

He hops up from the floor and then offers me both hands. I place my hands in his and he gently pulls me to a standing position. My stomach turns in a couple circles and for a second I think I’m going to be sick but it passes. Wrapping my arms around my stomach, I follow him back into my room. He points me in the direction of an armchair in the room and not having strength to do much else, I sink into it and rest my head against the back of it. My eyes half open, I watch him move through the room.

“What are you doing?” I finally ask.

“If you’re staying here tonight you can’t sleep on a bare mattress,” he replies, shaking out a sheet. “I found the box full of your sheets and blankets so I’m going to make your bed.”

I roll my head to the side, my eyes following his movement. “You know how to make a bed?”

He tosses me a smile over his shoulder as he smoothes the sheet across the mattress. “My mom used to make me do this every week when I was a kid. I make a mean bed.”

If I didn’t feel so sick, I’d probably laugh. But for now, all I can do is close my eyes and try and keep the contents of my stomach from exiting me. I don’t open them again until I feel Justin brush his hand over my hair. When I focus my eyes on him, I find him holding a juice box towards me.

“Think you can drink this?”

I take it from him and examine it. “Where did this come from?”

“You had no food and I know you probably don’t feel like eating but I got you some juice and bread and some Gravol.” He sits down on the armrest of the chair and takes the juice box from me. He pops the straw out of the plastic and then pushes it into the top.

I make myself raise my head up from its resting position as he offers me the juice again. Honestly, the thought of drinking anything isn’t too appealing at this point but my mouth is dry and I know I need to get some sort of liquid in me before I get too dehydrated.

As I take a small sip from the juice box, I notice that my bed is made and a few pillows now sit at the headboard. He worked fast.

“Do you want me to grab the Gravol?”

At this point I’ll take any medication he is willing to offer. “Okay.”

He stands and disappears from the room. My eyes follow him and then move to the bed. Now that it’s made, it looks so much more inviting and I pull myself up from the armchair and shuffle over to it.

There’s something about sliding in between cool, clean sheets that makes you feel so much better when you’re sick. I put the juice box on a couple of stacked boxes by the bed and then lay down, curling myself onto my side and letting my head sink into the pillow. This is so, so much better than my previous situation.

“So I couldn’t find the nondrowsy stuff so this is probably going to knock you out.”

I open my eyes and see Justin coming back into my room. He hands me a couple pills and I put them in my mouth and reach over to grab the juice box. As I’m swallowing the pills, he sits down on the edge of the bed.

“Do you think you’ll probably just sleep?” he asks and I nod.

“I’m exhausted.” My eyes shut as he brings his hand up to my head and smoothes it over my hair. His touch is perfectly comforting at this point.

“I’m going to probably go then. With the Gravol you’ll sleep through the night.”

I crack open an eye when his hand withdraws. “Thanks so much for doing all this. You didn’t have to.”

He gives me a smile and rubs his knuckles over my cheek. “You needed someone here though. Don’t worry about it.” He stands up. “And if you need anything else, call me, okay? I can come back over.”

I nod even though I know I won’t call him unless I’m actually dying. He’s done way too much already. Hannah’s going to die when I tell her all this.

Just when I thought he couldn’t get any sweeter, he kissed the tips of his fingers and then placed them on my cheek. “Sleep and feel better, okay?” he said, pulling the blanket up to my chin.

I manage a small smile and close my eyes as he gets up from the bed. A small sigh escapes me as I move slightly in my bed to get more comfortable. If I didn’t have a huge crush on him before, I do now.

A grin slowly stretches itself across my face and I lean back in my chair, my eyes going to the ceiling. “Are we doing a quiz or something?”

“Just answer the question.”

“Maybe…a caramel macchiato?”

“Really?”

“Is that the wrong answer or something?”

“Nope, that’s great.”

It’s quiet on the other end of the line and my eyebrows rise a bit. “So was asking me a prying question the only reason for your call, Cassie?”

Her light laughter comes over the line and my smile grows a bit. “It was hardly prying.”

“Knowing someone’s Starbucks drink is like knowing a piece of their soul.”

“You should put that on a bumper sticker.”

“I might.” My eyes fall on Trace, who’s sitting on a couch across the small room, playing with his Blackberry. He looks about as bored as I am. “How’s the stomach?”

“I ate a bit of lunch and all went well so I’m thinking I’m pretty much better.”

“You know why? It’s cause I convinced you to take yesterday off instead of going into the store.”

She laughed again. “That might be it. Although I think I lost a few million brain cells from watching all those movies.”

I called her up yesterday morning to see if she had ended up going to the store and when she told me she had postponed the renovation until today, I had decided to go over to her place again and chill with her. She had looked better from the day before, although still not healthy, and had eaten a bit of toast although she did end up throwing it up later. But at least yesterday she was smiling and laughing a bit and her fever was down. I hooked up her TV downstairs and we had spent a good portion of the afternoon watching movies.

“I’m sure you’ll be fine.”

“So are you still at the studio?”

“That I am.”

“How much longer will you be there?”

“A while yet.” I wasn’t going to tell her this, but I was actually supposed to be at the studio yesterday but I blew it off to hang out with her. That’s just a perk of producing a song for an up and coming artist. You can basically rearrange whatever you want and they’ll go with it. Not that I’m not paying for it today because I’ve been at the studio since ten this morning and it’s now four and we probably won’t be leaving for another few hours. But a long day is worth it since I got to spend all day yesterday with Cassie.

“Too bad.”

“Are you still at the store?”

“I’m leaving soon. The contractor’s already gone and there’s not a lot left I can do.”

“What’s your schedule look like tomorrow?”

“Most likely same as today. I’m hoping to get some unpacking done at some point too.”

“Well you know my offer still stands.”

“And don’t think for a minute I won’t take you up on that free physical labor and put you to work.”

I chuckle and slouch down in my chair a bit more. Talking with her just puts me at ease. “Don’t make me regret my generosity.”

“I’d never do that.” I hear the sound of a bell and people talking. “Hey, I’ve got to go.”

“Alright. Call me when you’ve got tomorrow sorted out.”

“Sure. Bye.”

“Bye.” I drop my phone onto my lap and stretch my arms above my head, grimacing a bit when my shoulders pop. “Where’s Bridget? She’s been gone for like half an hour.”

Trace doesn’t look up from his Blackberry. “You’re the one who told her to take a break.”

“Yeah, but half an hour? I don’t want to be here all night.”

“I’m sure she won’t be much longer.” Trace smiles and raises his eyebrows but still doesn’t look at me. “You realize that girl has a major crush on you.”

“Bridget?”

“Yeah, man. Don’t tell me you haven’t noticed.”

Of course I’ve noticed. The poor girl was painfully shy when I first met her this morning and blushed at every time I said anything to her. She’s warmed up a bit over the past few hours and it’s obvious she’s got a schoolgirl crush on me. What can I say? I’ve just got that charm.

“Well maybe if she wasn’t like sixteen…”

“And if you weren’t lusting over Cassandra Reyna.”

I scoffed. “I’m not lusting over her. How would you even know?”

He finally puts his Blackberry to the side and looks up at me. “Because I’ve had to listen to you go on and on about her for the past couple weeks,” he says with a smirk as he settles into the corner of the couch. “It’s a bit sickening really.”

I roll my eyes and turn my chair away from him to face the soundboard. So maybe I’ve been talking about Cassie a lot lately. Sometimes I’ll start going on about her to Trace and I know I’m talking too much and he’s losing interest but it’s like I can’t stop. The girl has such a hold on me it’s scary.

“I don’t get a response for that one?”

“You’re such a dick, Trace.”

He laughs loudly but I ignore it. I love him to death but sometimes spending the entire day with him can get to me. Especially when he won’t let the Cassie issue go.

The studio door opens and I look over to see Bridget Sparks burst into the room.

“I’m so sorry. My mom called and I didn’t realize how long I was on the phone for.”

I can’t help but smile. She’s so young and sweet. This is her first record and she’s still so naïve to the business. It’s almost a little refreshing. “No worries. Sometimes when moms get talking it can go on forever.”

The corner of her mouth turns up and she lifts her hand up to play the ends of her hair. “She’s just really worried about me being out here without her. She calls like fifty times a day.”

“Well it’s good you got someone like that in your life.”

She’s just standing there smiling at me and I glance to the side to see Trace silently laughing at me. I shoot him a glare before clearing my throat. “So are you ready to do the second verse?”

She blinks as if she’s forgotten why she’s here in the first place and then shakes her head slightly. “Okay.”

She gets settled back in the recording booth and I adjust a few dials. I start the music to the track and she begins to sing. While she may be young and naïve, her tone and pitch is absolutely amazing. Jive was lucky to have snatched her up.

We’re half an hour into recording the verse when there’s a soft knock on the closed door. I don’t move or look away from what’s in front of me, knowing Trace will get it. But when I hear a familiar voice, my head jerks to the right and a smile jumps onto my lips. Immediately pushing the chair away from the soundboard, I stand up.

“This is a surprise.”

“I hope I’m not completely interrupting.”

“Never.”

Cassie steps fully into the room and it’s then I notice that she’s carrying two Starbucks cups. She hands one to me.

“Caramel macchiato?”

I laugh. “Is that what the whole Starbucks question was about?”

She smiles and raises her own cup to her lips to take a sip.

“You didn’t have to get me this.”

“You’ve taken care of me the past few days plus you finished painting my living room,” she states. “I owe you like a month worth of coffee.”

I raise my drink to her in a mock toast. “Well thank you. This is exactly what I needed.”

“Justin?”

Bridget’s timid voice reminds me that I kind of deserted her in the booth. Quickly going back to the window, I lean down into the mike. “Sorry, Bridget. Wanna take five?”

She nods and exits the booth. “Was the verse okay?”

“It was great.” I turn back to Cassie. “Bridget, this is Cassandra Reyna. Cassie, this is Bridget. She’s the one I’m producing for today.”

Cassie smiles and offers her free hand to Bridget. “Hi. Nice to meet you.”

Bridget studies her for a brief minute before shaking her hand. “You too. Are you the designer?”

“I am. Do you follow fashion?”

“I want to be a fashion designer.”

“Hey, what about singing?” I interject and she blushes.

“I want to do both.”

I chuckle. “You’re just going to be one of those amazing celebrities that does everything, huh?”

Bridget’s face gets a bit redder and she ducks her head. “Whatever.”

A silence falls over the room and I move towards the door, motioning for Cassie to follow me. “Come out here for a second.”

We leave the room and I close the door behind us. When we’re alone in the hallways, I turn to her and am about to tell her how great it is to see her but she speaks before I can.

“Somebody has a not so secret admirer,” she smiles, gesturing to the closed door.

I laugh and roll my eyes. “Yeah well, she’s a little young for me. Besides, I have my eyes on another female,” I say, smiling at her.

Cassie’s eyebrows rise and she laughs lightly. “Is that so?”

“And here I thought I was being obvious.”

She raises her drink to her lips, her eyes never leaving mine. Once she swallows, she speaks. “So we have unpacking plans for tomorrow night?”

“We do. You know, one of these days you’re going to have to let me take you out for an actual date. Seems like all we’ve done together is do home renovations at your place.”

“You don’t have to help me if you don’t want to.”

“Oh, I want to,” I quickly interject. “But at some point I’d like to take you on a proper date.”

She smiles and wets her lips. “At some point I’m sure that can be arranged.”

I watch as she takes a drink and then wipes the corner of her mouth with her thumb. “So let me ask you something.”

“What’s that?”

“What’s your reasoning behind the three week kissing rule?”

She raises her eyebrows, probably not expecting the question. But it’s a legitimate thing to want to know. “Honestly? It weeds out the sleazy guys. Only the decent ones stick around for three weeks.”

“So that makes me a decent guy?”

Her smile returns. “Well we’re only on week two. I’ve yet to see.”

There’s never been a moment since I’ve met her where I’ve wanted to kiss her more. I try to not entertain the thought. “Seventeen days actually,” I correct.

She simply laughs and takes another sip of her coffee. I flash her a grin and lean back against the wall. “If you think about it, your three week rule probably kept me from catching the stomach flu from you.”

“See, we all benefit from it.”

I could seriously spend all day here with her. She puts me in such a great mood. But I know I need to get back to Bridget. “I’d love to stay out here but I should probably get back inside.”

“I was just going to say.”

“Did you want to stick around?” I ask, hoping she’ll say yes.

“I would but I’m exhausted after today.”

“And you should probably get as much sleep as you can so you can get completely better.”

“You know, you’re like my own personal nurse.”

I laugh. “Well you’re a good patient.”

“I try.”

Mindful of both of our cups of coffee, I step forward and give her a hug. “I’ll give you a call later about tomorrow, okay?”

“Sure.”

I hug her probably a few moments longer than necessary but can’t help it. She fits perfectly against me. When I pull back, I bring up my hand to brush my fingers across her smooth cheek.

“Thanks again for the coffee.”

“You’re welcome. I’ll see you later.”

“Bye.”

She begins to walk down the hallway and my eyes follow her. She glances over her shoulder once and laughs as she finds me staring at her but I can’t look away. With a lift of her hand, she gives me a short wave and then disappears around the corner. Only once she is completely out of sight do I turn the doorknob and re-enter the room, hoping the rest of recording will go smoothly so I can get home and call Cassie.

Trace is back on the couch and Bridget’s sitting in my vacated chair when I step back into the room, shutting the door behind me.

“And how is Cassie doing?” Trace asks.

I can’t help but smile. Just hearing her voice does that to me and yes, I’m well aware that is pathetic. “She’s great.”

“She’s gone already?”

“I asked her if she wanted to stay but she’s still a bit under the weather so she’s going home.”

“Are you dating her?” Bridget asks suddenly and my eyes turn to her. I forgot she was here for a second.

Trace begins to snicker. “Yeah, Justin.”

I shoot him a glare and then turn back to Bridget. I never would have expected such a bold question to come from such a seemingly timid girl. “It’s a little complicated,” I say and leave it at that. And it’s no lie. I’m not quite sure what Cassie and I are to each other at this point. We’re definitely past the point of friends, but I wouldn’t define her as my girlfriend at this moment.

Bridget falls back into silence and after an awkward moment, I decide to take charge.

“Let’s get back to recording,” I say, draining the last of my coffee and tossing the empty cup into the trash. Last thing I need is the two of them analyzing my relationship with Cassie. At this point, my brain does that enough all on it’s own.

Justin is stretched out in my leather desk chair and telling me a story about his cousin and I’m watching his lips move but I can’t concentrate on a single word he’s saying.

It’s Sunday. March fourth. It’s Sunday, March fourth and Justin and I have officially known each other for twenty two days. Twenty two days is over three weeks but there has been no kiss. What the hell is this.

I love that he respected my three week rule and didn’t try anything during that time. But when I had first told him about the rule, he had made a point to say that March third was the day in which we had officially known each other for three weeks. He was waiting for the day and then yesterday came and went and I barely heard from him. Given, he had an interview for most of the day and then he had a birthday dinner for his uncle he had to go to, but still. I was expecting something.

At the very least, I expected the kiss when he arrived at the store this afternoon for lunch. But he had merely given me a brief hug and handed me the bag of takeout and then asked for a tour. I don’t even know how to explain this. And it doesn’t help that this has been the longest three weeks and let’s face it, I’ve really been waiting for him to kiss me. Every time we’re together, there’s like this buildup of tension that I know will go away as soon as we kiss.

Anticipation makes everything sweeter but at this point, anticipation is killing me.

I suddenly realize that he’s fallen silent and is staring at me. I blink a few times and focus my eyes on him. I look at his expectant stare for a few quiet seconds.

“Sorry, what?”

His lips curve up into a smile. “Where were you just now?”

I fight off a blush from creeping up my cheeks. “Lost in thought.”

“I asked if you had plans tomorrow night.”

“I do actually. Susan is coming into the city and I’m meeting with her.”

“Who is she again?”

“She’s a friend of the family. She’s almost like my agent but more of a mentor. She’s helping me with the opening.”

“Ahh.”

I shift against the top of the desk I’m sitting on as he lean his chair back into a reclining position. He’s so relaxed and casual right now and I feel like my nerves are on edge. It’s waiting for the inevitable and just wondering at what moment it will come.

But…maybe it isn’t the inevitable. Maybe the reason he hasn’t kissed me is because he’s changed his mind about me. I thought we were kind of a done deal but maybe that isn’t the case. If it were, wouldn’t we have just kissed by now?

I hate how I’m sitting here obsessing about it and how I’ve been obsessing about it since he walked through the front door today. I can’t even remember one thing we’ve talked about because the entire time we’ve been here, all I’ve been thinking about is kissing him.

I should just take the first step and kiss him at this point. It would save all this mental abuse I’m putting myself through. But I like the guy to make the first move. I want him to sweep me off my feet and kiss me like I know he’s been wanting to do since that night we painted at my house. I may live in a fantasy world sometimes, but I’m pretty sure I’m right about his attraction to me. And my attraction for him is growing day by day.

Justin’s hand is suddenly touching my knee and I meet his eyes.

“You really are off in another world today,” he says. “You keep zoning out.”

I shake my head, trying to rid my brain of all thoughts but the current situation. “I know. I’m sorry.”

His hand slides from my knee back to his lap. “What’s on your mind?”

I bite my bottom lip and stare at him, his eyebrows raising a bit as he waits for my response. It’s only quiet for a short moment. “It’s March fourth,” I blurt out.

His eyes glance down at his watch and then back up to me. “Yes,” he confirms.

I give him a look. “And yesterday was March third.”

A smile is slowly spreading across his face. “And the day before that was March second.”

He’s teasing me and it’s only serving to make me flustered. “No, March fourth means that we’ve known each other for twenty two days.” He continues to just watch me with a smile on his face and I press forward. “Twenty two days is over three weeks.”

His smile relaxes for a second but then comes back full force. “Just say it. You’re wondering why I haven’t kissed you.”

“Yes,” I exclaim and a blush promptly covers my cheeks at how loud my voice is. I hadn’t meant for that to happen. I automatically go to run my fingers through my hair but when they get caught in my ponytail, I drop my hand back to my side.

He leans forward slightly in the chair, resting his forearms on the armrests. “After you left the studio on Tuesday, Bridget asked me we were dating.”

Not exactly the response I was anticipating, but I went with it. “Oh?”

“I told her it was complicated because I don’t know what we are to each other.” His eyes briefly search mine. “I want to be able to say yes to that question though.”

My lips twitch into a small smile. “Me too.”

His slightly serious look relaxes into an easy smile. “So, Cassandra Reyna, I’d like to make this official and ask you to be my girlfriend.”

My smile gets a bit bigger and I desperately try to hide the giddiness inside that resulted from his words. “I would love that, Justin Timberlake.”

His face breaks into a full smile and I can’t help but return it. I love when he really smiles. His eyes squint up and his eyebrows go together a bit and it’s like his entire face smiles, not just his mouth.

He brings his leg up and rests his ankle on his knee and then taps his foot against my leg. “And as for the three week thing…” He shrugs as if he doesn’t need to explain and I narrow my eyes a bit and kick the underside of his chair. He lets out a laugh. “You have your three week rule. My rule is that a first kiss should happen when the time is right. All this anticipation…you don’t want to just ruin it by kissing each other just because it’s been twenty one days, do you?”

“Well…no.”

“I’ve never waited this long to kiss a girl before after wanting to kiss her the first day I met her,” he says and a blush promptly forms across my face. “You have your three week rule and I respect that and want it to be perfect for you.” He weaves his fingers together behind the back of his head and cocks an eyebrow at me with a smile. “Is that acceptable for you?”

I let out a short laugh. “Yes,” I reply. I swing my legs back and forth a few times in the space between us and brace my hands on the edge of the desk. We sit there in silence and that’s just fine.

My day started off pretty bad. I woke up late and had to rush to get ready and then on my way to the store, realized that I was low on gas. I probably could have pushed it but I get paranoid that I’ll run out of gas on the middle of the highway, which is not high on my to do list. By time I got gas and got to the store, the contractor was waiting and not exactly happy with me for being late and that is not something I want or need. As if to get back at me, he informed me that it was going to take longer than he had expected to get the store ready for opening and that severely sucks.

But…Justin just made all of that disappear. He wants me to be his girlfriend. He wants to date me and he does want to kiss me and after listening to his reasoning, I’m glad that he didn’t kiss me right away. How perfect is he that he wants it to be at the exact right time and for it to be special? I’ve never had a guy want to do something like that for me before. When you make a guy wait three weeks for a kiss, either he’s running for the hills or can hardly contain himself once the twenty first day hits. Justin is something else.

I want to just sit there with him all day. But when the contractor comes into the room and clears his throat in a not so subtle way, I pull my eyes away from Justin’s and push myself off the desk so I can go talk to the guy. I stand there as he goes over some renovation plans and I’m really trying to give him my full attention but my eyes keep wandering back to Justin. He’s merely sitting there, watching me and smiling. His smile is warming my insides and making me feel giddy. The grumpy contractor is not going to bring me down from my high.

“I should probably let you get back to work,” Justin says once I get rid of the contractor and join him back at the desk.

I want to protest and insist that he stays but I know I need to concentrate. I’m never going to get the store open if I spend all my time with him. “Yeah,” I say and he gets up from the chair.

I try and hide the disappointed expression on my face but I don’t think I do a very good job because he laughs a bit at me and grabs my hands. He weaves his fingers through mine and brings my arms away from my sides before swinging them in between us.

“Busy tonight?”

I begin to smile. “No. Want to change that?”

He laughs and rubs his thumbs over the backs of my hands. “Definitely. Feel like going out or staying in?”

“Staying in.”

“Come over to my place. We’ll watch some movies.”

“Okay.”

“Remember how to get there?”

I’ve been there once before but he was driving and it was night. “Maybe?”

“Give me a call if you get lost and I’ll give you directions.”

“Okay.”

“What time do you think you’ll get out of here?”

“I’m going for six.”

“And you’ll come over right from here?” I nod and he smiles. “Perfect.” He begins to walk to the door and with his hands still holding mine, I’m pulled with him.

“Do you want me to bring anything?” I ask when we reach the door.

“Just your lovely self,” he replies and I blush a bit. This guy knows how to talk to a girl.

He lets go of my hands and then leans down to hug me. I return it, gripping onto his back a little tighter and letting out a laugh when he straightens and pulls me a few inches off the floor. When he lowers me back to the ground, his lips get dangerously close to mine but then at the last minute, they veer to the left and land on my cheek.

“See you tonight.”

My hand comes up to rest on my kissed cheek and I can’t tear my eyes away from him as he strides out of the store and to his car. My hearts beating faster than normal and my whole body feels hot.

That kiss better happen soon. I can’t take much more waiting.

* * *

“When did it start to rain?”

I look away from Cassie and out the window of the front door. “I dunno. I didn’t hear it start.”

She finishes putting on her shoes and straightens. “In a house this size, a bomb could go off outside and you wouldn’t hear it,” she states matter of factly. “Really, I think you should consider what I said before.”

I chuckle. She’s been going on all night about how my house is much too massive for just one person. I tried to defend myself saying that Trace or Rachel stay over a lot so I’m not always by myself but she kept teasing me about it. I think she likes getting a rise out of me and hey, I can’t say I hate it. It’s fun.

“You’re just jealous that my house is bigger than yours.”

She glares at me but her smile gives her away. She likes this as much as I do. “I happen to love my house. Do you think the roads will be bad?”

I’ve noticed she does that a lot. She likes to have the last word in and then she’ll change the subject before you can say anything. I’ll let her have this one. She knows she’s jealous of my house.

“They’re probably not great. You’ll want to drive slow.”

“It’s the other drivers I should worry about more than myself. I swear LA drivers are absolutely crazy. I have never gotten the finger so many times than in the last couple weeks.”

I begin to laugh. “What are you doing out there to get the finger?”

“I have no idea! Apparently Seattle has a different set of driving rules than the rest of the world. Maybe one day you can enlighten me on driving out here so I don’t become the object of hatred for all the other drivers.”

“I’m sure I can manage that,” I laugh. I lean my shoulder against the wall and we fall into a comfortable silence.

I’m not thrilled she’s leaving but it’s past eleven and she has to work early in the morning. I wish she didn’t because I could see myself spending all night with her. All we ended up doing was watching a couple movies but it was one of the best nights I’ve had in a really long time.

I let her pick out first movie and she ended up deciding on this movie that I borderline hate. I don’t even know why I own it. I think I got it for a gift from some family member and I couldn’t bring myself to tossing it. She seemed to want to watch it though so I went along with it and it turned out to be a good thing. She sat close beside me on the couch and a few minutes into the movie when I put my arm around her waist and rested it on her hip, she curled into my body and put her head on my shoulder and stayed that way then entire movie. At that point, it didn’t matter what we were watching. We could have been watching the damn weather network and it still would have been amazing.

Even now, standing by the door, I can still feel her on the couch with me. Her body was so warm and she fits nicely against me. She’s not too big or too small or too tall or too short. It’s just…right.

“Tonight was fun,” Cassie says, pulling me from my thoughts. I focus my eyes on her as she puts on her jacket. “We should-”

“Do it again sometime?” I finish for her and she laughs.

“Exactly.”

I reach past her and open the front door to check out the weather situation. The rain is coming down pretty steady and she’s going to be drenched before she even reaches her car. “I’ll get an umbrella and walk you out to your car.”

She doesn’t protest and I smile as I grab an umbrella from the closet floor. I like that she just lets me be a gentleman with her. I’ve yet to meet a girl who didn’t like it but a lot of times, you offer to do something and they protest and make you talk them into it, which is irritating. I wouldn’t be offering if I didn’t want to do it.

I slip on my shoes and then open the front door, open the umbrella, and pull her to my side. We had only taken a few steps outside when something seemed off.

“What’s with this umbrella?”

I look over at her. “What?”

“Are there ho-” She stops abruptly and brings up a hand to wipe her cheek. “There’s holes in your umbrella, Justin!”

I look up just in time to get a large drop of rain in my eye. Squinting, I shake my head to get the water out. “What the hell…”

She begins to laugh. “Where did you get this thing?”

“I don’t know. I’ve never used it before. It’s always just been laying in the closet.”

The umbrella is suddenly pulled from my hand and tossed on the ground. I look over at her as the rain really begins to hit us.

“It’s not like we were dry anyways,” she says, flicking a bit of water off the tip of her finger at me.

I laugh. “Well we weren’t quite this wet either.”

She shrugs. “It’s just rain.” She grabs my hand and begins to pull me across the driveway to her car. I trail behind her, smiling. With ever passing minute, I’m falling more and more for her. There’s just something about her that keeps pulling me in. I couldn’t stop it even if I wanted to.

She halts abruptly by her car and I bump into her slightly. I give her a tug on her hand and she turns around to face me. The few strands of hair that weren’t in her ponytail were sticking wetly to her face and she brings up a hand to push them away. She stares at me silently for a long minute and I can’t do anything but stare back.

She looks amazing standing there and I feel so lucky that she’s mine. She’s now officially my girlfriend and no one can take that away. I’ve never felt better than I do right at this moment, with the rain pouring down around us.

I reach out to grab her other hand and then pull her the few steps towards me. She smiling as she stands right in front of me and I release one of her hands to run up her arm and then to her face. I brush my thumb over her cheek, taking the water with it and then bring both hands up to run over the top of her head, smoothing her hair back. She continues to watch me and I realize that neither of us has said anything in a while. As soon as that thought comes to me, another does as well that it really doesn’t matter. I don’t need to say anything and neither does she. We just have to be here together.

Her eyes flutter shut as I bring my hands from her hair to her cheeks. I run both thumbs lightly over her eyelids and then under her eyes, wiping away the bit of her mascara that’s run because of the rain. My fingers then pause on her face and this prompts her eyes to open.

The moment her eyes meet mine it catapults me into motion and I move my head down to capture her lips with mine. She’s waiting for it and leans up into it.

Immediately, I know this is a first kiss I will never forget. And at that moment, I realize that for a first kiss to be amazing you need it to mean something. It has to be with someone that who’s been running through your head for twenty two days and who has plagued every thought since meeting her backstage at a fashion show. Waiting for this kiss has made it that much sweeter that I never want to come up for air.

My mouth moves across hers and her hands come to life. A chill goes through me as her hands circle the back of my head and keeps me right where I am. This kiss is so hot, so deep, that I can’t imagine ever not kissing her. This is exactly where I needed to be all along.

It’s easy to become lost in this fantasy but the physical needs of a human body, such as sucking in a breath of air ever few seconds begins to interfere with this heaven. My chest is tight and I force myself to pull my lips from hers.

It would have been easy to just take a breath and go in for more, but I stop myself. There was something so perfect about that kiss that I can’t let this turn into a make out session. The kiss was so perfect that it feels like it just needs to be left at that. So instead of going in to kiss her again, I open my eyes and find her staring at me. When our eyes meet, she wraps her arms around me and hugs me tightly.

“Thank you,” she says, her voice barely audible over the rain pounding down around us. She rests her head against my chest and I move my arms to circle her.

“Thank you,” I return, kissing the top of her head. “That was so worth the wait.”

She lifts her head and looks up at me and smiles and I look down at her and smile as well. I’m not quite sure how long we stay like that but it’s long enough for me to memorize every detail of her face and replay the kiss in my mind a few times. I’m finally pulled back to the present when I feel her shiver against me and I realize we need to get out of the cold rain.

“You need to go to bed,” I say. I don’t want her to leave and she knows that but we both know she has to be up early tomorrow so she nods in agreement.

I reluctantly let go of her and she turns to her car and unlocks the door. She gets in and settles her self and turns on the car. I lean in across her and turn on her heater full blast so she’ll warm up and not get sick from the rain. I begin to pull back out of the car but a hand on my cheek stops me and when I turn my head to her, she brings me in for another kiss. It’s different from the first, quicker, but just as amazing.

“Call me tomorrow,” she says when she releases me.

She didn’t need to tell me that. After tonight, I wouldn’t be able to not talk to her tomorrow. “I will.”

I pull myself away from the car and stand up, shutting the door for her. Shoving my hands in the pockets of my jeans, I step away from her car and stand there as she drives away. I could stand there all night but the cold rain eventually pushes me into going back inside.

I’m in a daze as I go back into my house and shake the water off of me. This girl is some kind of drug and I think I’m getting addicted.

At eleven in the morning, I left Cassie a message on her phone telling her that I had made plans for us tonight and she needed to be ready by seven. It isn’t until two thirty in the afternoon that I hear back from her.

“What are we doing tonight?” is the first thing she asks me when I pick up my phone.

I push away from the soundboard in front of me, my chair rolling back across the floor. “Do you realize that we’ve known each other for over a month and you’ve never let me take you out on a proper date?”

I don’t even have to ask that question. She knows it because I’ve been bugging her about it the past couple weeks. At first it wasn’t a big deal but then it started to stand out to me. Whenever we were together we were at my house or her place. The only time we had really been out in public together was the night after I met her in New York when we went for dinner. But we weren’t dating then and it’s not the same.

Anytime I suggest we go out and do something, she always has a reason not to. Usually it’s that she’s tired or just doesn’t feel like it. And I don’t really care where we are as long as we get to spend time together. Lately though…I just want to take her out on an actual date. I want to go somewhere out in public and you know…maybe I want to show her off just a bit.

“That’s what you’ve been telling me.”

“So tonight I’m changing that.”

“What are we doing?” she asks again.

“Going out,” I say simply.

“But where?”

She sounds like she’s getting exasperated but I’m not going to give in. Surprising her will be fun. “Out.”

An annoyed sigh is carried over the line but it doesn’t bother me too much. I highly doubt she’s really irritated. She just likes to have all the answers.

“Well how am I going to know what to wear?” she counters.

“Something casual.”

“I hate surprises.”

No she doesn’t. “Hm.”

“I’m hanging up.”

“I’ll be at your house at seven.”

All I get is a click in my ear as she hangs up and it makes me laugh out loud. I’ve never met a person who likes to get their way more than Cassie. On her though, it doesn’t bother me. It’s kind of endearing. Of course, when you’re completely infatuated with a person, everything they do is endearing.

“Are you ready to get back to it?”

I look back to my producer, Scott, who had come into the room when I had been on the phone. “Yeah. I’m thinking we need to change some of the lyrics in the second verse. It’s not sounding right.”

“I was thinking that too,” he says. “We can play around with it.”

“Sure.” I check my watch and see it’s close to three. “I need to be out of here by six thirty.”

“Sure.”

Pulling my chair back to the soundboard, I slip my headphones back over my ears and force myself to concentrate on the task at hand rather than my upcoming date with Cassie.

* * *

“Mom, once I get the store open and running I’ll have more time. All I’m saying is if you come up now I won’t have any time to even see you.”

“I only said it would be nice to see you again.”

My eyes close in exasperation. This is my mother and I love her but sometimes, well often, she’s just too much to handle. She can be so passive aggressive with the things she says and usually when I get off the phone with her, I need an hour to simply collect myself.

“Yes, I know you only said that. And I’m just saying that I’m incredibly busy right now and if you come up now I won’t be able to spend any time with you. I don’t want you to come here for nothing.”

“That’s fine, Cassandra. You’ll just have to let me know when it’s a more convenient time to see your mother and I’ll come then.”

I fight back a growl of frustration and instead force a tight smile onto my lips even thought she’s not there to witness my efforts. “I’ll make sure to do that, Mom,” I say in the most pleasant voice I can muster. “Look, I have to go get ready. Justin’s going to be here in a few minutes.”

“Are things getting serious between you and him?”

That’s her way of asking if I’m sleeping with him. “Well, it’s been a month,” I say and leave it at that. Like it’s any of her business. For the time being, I’d like to keep my relationship with Justin private from my mother. “But I really have to go.”

“Fine. I’ll talk to you another time.”

“Sure. Bye.” I hang up the phone and drop it onto the counter. I’m in the process of taking some deep, calming breaths when my doorbell rings. Cracking open an eye, I check my watch and see it’s a bit before seven. I need more time to chill out before I see Justin and he’s definitely early.

I move towards the door before he can ring the doorbell again. He is the most impatient guy I know.

“Hey,” he greets when I open the door and usher him in. “You look…uh, a little stressed.”

I give him a small smile. “Do I?”

“What’s up?”

I usually try not to talk about my family because it’s such a complicated situation. He doesn’t understand my mother. “I was just on the phone with my mom,” I say.

His eyebrows rise. “Did you get in a fight with her?”

“No. Just usual conversation.”

“Usual conversation has you looking like this?” he asks.

“You don’t know my mother,” I reply.

“You’re right. Actually, I realized that I don’t know much about any of your family.”

“And it’s best to keep it that way,” I say, grabbing a coat from the front closet.

He gets a weird look on his face but it disappears quickly when I step up to him and rise on my toes so my lips meet his.

It’s been two weeks since our first kiss and it’s like since that point, I can’t get enough of him. There’s something about his kisses that are completely intoxicating. I start kissing him and it feels like I can’t get enough. I just want to soak him up entirely and never let go.

His lips are soft as he kisses me and he wraps his arms around me, his fingers splayed across my back. I love when he holds me. His grip is so secure and I feel so safe with his arms around me.

I pull my mouth away from his and hug him tightly. Burying my face in his neck, I breathe in deeply, my lips turning up as the smell of his cologne fills my nose. I’ve grown completely in love with his cologne over the weeks I’ve known him. It’s subtle, but always there and purely masculine. One day I’m going to steal one of his shirts just so I can have that smell around me all the time.

Justin’s hands run in soothing circles on my back and I let my eyes drift shut. There’s nothing I’d rather do than stay here with him all night but he’s been so insistent on going out for an “actual date” as he keeps calling it that I know there’s no convincing him to stay in.

“Feel less stressed?” his voice murmurs in my ear and I smile and pull my head back.

“Much. Can you be here every time she calls?”

He laughs. “What exactly is so horrible about her?”

I shake my head and grab my purse. “She’s just a lot to handle,” I say, not wanting to get into it.

He opens the front door and we leave my house. After I’ve locked the door, he grabs my hand and leads me to his car.

“She lives in San Francisco right?”

“Yeah.”

He opens my door for me and waits until I’m in and then shuts it. His mother did a fine job in raising him.

“So where are we going?” I ask when he opens the drivers door and gets in. “Or are you still keeping that on the down low?”

He grins over at me and starts the car. “Patience, Cassie.”

I scoff and buckle up my seatbelt. “You’re hardly one to be talking about patience.”

He pretends to be offended. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

I playfully roll my eyes at him. “How many times have I not answered the door quick enough for you and you’ve rung the bell like ten times?”

He begins to smile and then tries to cover it. “Make fun of me now but you’re going to be thanking me for that the day that you’re lying on the floor dying and I save your life cause I’m persistant.”

I begin to laugh. “Which sounds like something that’s going to happen.”

“It could,” he replies and then flips on the radio and settles himself in his seat. I turn to look out the window, trying to figure out where exactly we’re going. But let’s be honest, I’m still not overly familiar with LA and he could be taking me anywhere and I wouldn’t have the slightest clue. After a few minutes of watching passing scenery, I turn to him.

“Did I dress casually enough?”

He pulls his eyes from the road and they run up and down my body. “Perfectly casual. You have it down to an art.”

“Casual for…maybe…bowling?” my words are drawn out and unsure. I have no idea what he has planned. He smiles but doesn’t look away from the road this time. “We’ll be there in ten minutes. You’re just going to have to wait.”

I give him a frustrated sigh. I hate not knowing what’s happening around me.

He merely smiles at my annoyance and reaches across the console for my hand. He gives it a squeeze and rubs his thumb over my knuckles.

“You make it sound like I’m taking you somewhere horrible.”

I lean my head against the back of the seat and turn it to look at his profile. “Maybe you are.”

He quickly smiles over at me. “Doubtful.”

“But-”

“Just shut up for five minutes and then we’ll be there, okay?”

If any other person were to tell me to shut up, I’d probably jump down their throat. But with the smile on his face, I can’t be mad at Justin when he says it. Instead, I sink down into the leather seat and look back out the window.

True to his word, five minutes later we arrive at the destination. I’m at first unsure about the slightly run down pool hall but after Justin reassures me that they have the ‘best damn burgers in the city’ and that ‘nothing beats a good old fashioned pool hall’, I decide to just go with it.

I’m actually pleasantly surprised at the date destination. Going out to a fancy dinner is always nice but it gets predictable and almost tedious after a while. I’ve gone out with too many guys where to them a date is dinner and a movie and there’s no creativity at all in it. With someone as famous as Justin, I almost expected a big expensive dinner and this is completely unexpected and welcome. This is the kind of place I grew up in and it’s refreshing to know places like this still exist.

There’s not a huge amount of people in the hall and we’re left pretty much to ourselves in a table in the back. After ordering and getting some drinks, we’re left alone. Only a short moment of silence hangs between us before I ask the question I had been wondering all night.

“So why was it so important for you to go on this date?”

Justin leans back in the booth seat and rubs his hands down his jean covered thighs. “Don’t you think it’s a little odd that we’ve been dating for a couple weeks now and whenever we spend time together it’s never around people?”

“I’d never really thought about it,” I shrug.

“Even with me bugging you about it?”

“Okay that made me wonder what the big deal was.”

“Don’t you think it’s a bit strange that this is the first time we’ve really been out in public together since dating?”

I shrug again. “No. We’re still getting to know each other. We don’t need to rush things.”

He gives me a strange look. “How is going out together in public rushing things?”

I’m starting to feel a bit like I’m being cross examined here. “It’s not. But…paparazzi follow you around and if they see you and me together, they’re automatically going to rush to the conclusion that we’re dating.”

“Which is true.”

“Yes, but that doesn’t mean the whole world has to know about it.”

“You don’t want anyone to know that we’re dating?”

“Not the entire world.” I frown a bit. “Why? Do you?”

He shrugs and looks towards the bar. “I hadn’t really thought too much about that. You can hide it for so long but eventually people figure out what’s going on. Why prolong that?”

I follow his gaze and then return my eyes back to his face. “Honestly? I’m not sure I’m ready to be attached publicly to some massive star.”

He turns his eyes back to me and a small smile forms over his lips. “It’s awkward when you refer to me as a massive star.”

I begin to smile as well. It’s the truth but it did feel weird coming out of my mouth. “I know.”

His head tilts to one side slightly and he regards me silently for a moment. When his question finally comes, it surprises me a bit. “You’ve never mentioned your dad. Is he in your life at all?”

Justin tends to switch topics a bit abruptly at times but this is sudden, even for him. I thought we were off the topic of my family. Why the sudden interest in my father? “My dad?”

He nods.

Getting into my messy family history isn’t exactly the way I wanted to spend our first “official date” so I decide to be blunt, to the point, and leave it at that. “He walked out on my mom when I was four. I don’t know him.”

Justin doesn’t say anything and I can tell he’s thinking about something and I wish I could read his mind and figure out what exactly that is. But I can’t and before he can ask any more questions about my family, I decide to change the subject.

“So are we just going to sit here while we wait for food or are you going to let me kick your ass at pool?”

His breaks into a smile. “Kick my ass?” he repeats. “I highly doubt that.”

Poor guy. He has no idea that I was the champion at pool when I was in university. “Are you scared, Justin?”

He scoffs and slides to the edge of the booth. “No. Let’s go.” He stands. When I don’t immediately moves he raises an eyebrow. “Come on, Cassie. I’m expecting that ass kicking now.”

He’s teasing me and I grin as I get up. This is going to be fun.

“He was born in 1926.”

“For an old guy.”

“He’s slept with hundreds and hundreds of questionable women.”

“He’s just a tameless bachelor.”

I don’t even try to hold back the laughter inside of me. “I can’t believe you have a thing for Hugh Hefner, Rachel.”

She smiles and unlocks the front door to Justin’s house. “Hey, I didn’t bash you when you brought up Charlie Sheen so you should lay off.”

I giggle. “At least Charlie Sheen is somewhere near my age. Hugh Hefner looks ready to keel over.”

She rolls her eyes but smiles at the same time. “Well that’s a rude thing to say.”

I smile and shake my head as I slide my shoes off. I’m so glad Justin introduced me to his cousin. He decided that I didn’t know enough people in LA so he randomly sent Rachel to my house one day to “do what girls do” as he put it. It had been a little weird at first considering I had never met her before, but she was easy to warm up to and over the past week we’ve become fast friends. And it’s really nice to have a girlfriend in LA. I talk on the phone to Hannah every few days but it’s not the same as having someone right there.

Rachel starts to walk through the house and yells out Justin’s name. When there’s no answer, she shrugs at me.

“He’s probably sleeping upstairs,” she says and begins to walk in the direction of the kitchen. “I have to call my mom.”

She disappears from sight and with nothing else to do, I start my way up the winding staircase leading to the second level of the house. I still can’t get over how massive his house is. I realize he has a huge amount of money and can easily afford it, but I can’t imagine living in such a big place all by myself.

Justin’s room is at the very end of the hallway and the door is shut. There isn’t an answer when I knock and after a minute I ease the door open and find him on the center of the large bed, sound asleep.

I hang back in the doorway for a moment simply because I don’t want to disturb him. Granted, he was the one who called and told me to come over once I was done lunch with Rachel so he probably won’t care too much if I wake him up. I decide to go with that thought and enter his room.

I walk across the room to the bed, taking in how peaceful Justin looks when he sleeps. He’s sprawled out in the middle of the bed, one arm raised above his head and the other resting on his stomach. His chest rises and falls with each breath he takes but no noise escapes him, which surprises me because I always thought he’d be a snorer.

He doesn’t stir when I sit down on the mattress, pulling my legs under me. I stare at his face for a moment.

He is so hot.

His lips part with a breath and I can imagine those lips on mine, kissing me. The last time he kissed me was at one thirty five yesterday afternoon when he was leaving the store. I had walked him to his car and he had pulled me tight against him and pressed his lips on mine in a kiss that left me dizzy. My mind had gone to mush and I had spent a good portion of the afternoon tracing my finger over my lips, still feeling him.

I’m falling for him fast. Faster than I’d like. I don’t like to rush into relationships because that’s never worked for me. I’ve always found that it’s better to take my time getting to know the person and even hold back a bit. But with Justin that incredibly hard to do. When I’m with him I just want more and more and when I’m apart from him, I’m craving to be near him again. Hannah says it’s true love. I say it’s slowly setting myself up.

Reaching out, I pick up the hand that’s on his stomach and weave my fingers through his and then rest our joined hands on my lap. I only have to sit there for another few seconds before his head turns to the side and he breathes in deeply. My thumb rubbing over the side of his hand prompts his eyes to open and they focus on me.

A smile stretches across his face and he squeezes my hand. “Hey. You’re here.”

“You said to come over when we were done lunch.”

“I just figured that Rach would drag you out shopping or something.” His eyes move to the half open door. “Is she here?”

“She said she was calling her mom.”

“She’ll be on the phone for at least an hour then.” His eyes move back to me and he smiles. “You know, this is the first time you’ve been in my bed.”

“Has that been a goal of yours?”

He merely continues to smile and gives me arm a tug, pulling me down. I slide next to him and stretch out on my side, facing him.

“Were you sleeping long?”

“About an hour,” he says, his hand pushing some hair away from my face. “I didn’t sleep good last night.”

“I can leave and you can sleep more,” I start to say but even as the words are coming out of my mouth, I can see him about to protest. Before he can speak, I continue, this time teasing. “I wouldn’t want to interrupt your beauty sleep. I’ll just go find Ra-”

Before I can say anything else, he’s moved, pushing me onto my back and is now hovering over top of me, his weight pinning me to the mattress. I laugh in surprise and he grins.

“You need to stay right here,” he states, resting his arms on either side of my head.

I giggle and loop my arms around his neck. “Right here?”

“Exactly right here,” he says, the last word coming out a mumble as his lips meet mine. I eagerly kiss him back, feeling like it’s been weeks since I’ve had his lips against mine. There’s something so special, so real, so hot about kissing him that I can’t ever imagine it ending and everything bad goes away with that simple contact. All my brain can manage to focus on is his lips moving on mine and his tongue sweeping into my mouth. This is so perfect.

Justin’s mouth moves lazily from my mouth to my jawline and then to the spot right below my ear. My eyes flutter shut as he kisses me there and they don’t open again until he pulls his mouth away after a few minutes of bliss.

“You look very pleased,” he comments, staring down at me.

A smile pulls at my lips. “Well that was very pleasing.”

He flashes me a smile. “Baby, you ain’t seen nothing yet.”

I laugh lean up to kiss him briefly. “What are the plans for tonight?” I ask when I pull back.

He shrugs. “Don’t know. You don’t have to go back to the store at all?”

“They’re painting and there’s nothing I could do if I was there. So you have to entertain me.”

“I’m sure I can come up with something.” He pushes my hair away from my face, fanning it out across the pillow under my head. “Think you can find time in your schedule for a lunch break on Thursday?”

“Probably.”

“Good. My mom’s coming to LA and I want you to meet her.”

I feel myself blanch slightly. “Your mom?”

He laughs. “Don’t look so worried. Mom keeps saying she wants to meet you.” He leans down so our noses are touching and gives me a quick kiss. “She’ll love you.”

I should probably say at this point how horrible I am when it comes to meeting boyfriends parents. Mothers especially. I don’t think I’ve ever made a good first impression on a boyfriend’s mother. And this isn’t any mother. This is Lynn Harless who Justin talks on the phone to every single day. I’ve teased him about being a mama’s boy countless times and he merely shrugs. And since he and Lynn are so close, she’s going to be insanely protective of him and then I’m going to walk in and make the worst impression ever. This is bad.

“Sounds great,” I choke out and somehow manage to fool him with that.

Sounds great? Sounds like a complete nightmare.

* * *

“It was horrible, Hannah,” I moan into the phone. “So completely horrible.”

“Are you being dramatic and it wasn’t really all that bad?”

“No. It was really really bad. She hates me.”

“What happened?”

I lean my head back against the headrest of my seat and shut my eyes. “I was supposed to meet them at this restaurant at twelve thirty but I was at the fabric store and lost track of time so I was twenty minutes late. So right away I’m setting a bad first impression and then when I get there I’m trying to make up for it and so I try and take the initiative and introduce myself and I call her Mrs. Timberlake.”

“Is that not her name?”

“No, Timberlake is Justin’s dad’s last name and his parents got divorced when he was a kid.”

Hannah’s quiet for a moment. “Oh. Oops.”

“I don’t even know why it came out of my mouth. I know her last name is Harless but it just came out.”

“Well it’s not the end of the world. I’m sure she gets that a lot.”

“Probably not by her son’s girlfriend.”

“Well, honestly, Cassandra, it’s not the end of the world.”

A car horn beeps and I open my eyes to see that the light has turned green and traffic is moving again. “That wasn’t it though,” I groan, stepping on the gas.

“What else happened?”

“After she explains almost a little too politely that her last name isn’t Timberlake, she starts interrogating me on everything. About living out here, my job, my FAMILY.”

“What did you say?”

“I side stepped half the questions. And Justin did nothing to help at all. He just sat there.”

“She probably just wants to get to know who her son is dating.”

“That’s what I kept telling myself but it was just so much. I’ve never been asked so many questions in my life.” Putting on my signal, I switch lanes and receive a series of horns. Seriously, what is with the drivers out here? “So then we order and she starts asking me about my designs and we get onto the topic of fashion and for some stupid reason I start to go on about how I think leopard prints are the tackiest thing ever and then I notice, she’s wearing leopard print. ”

“Wait, she’s wearing leopard print? Can we talk about THAT for a minute?”

“It was just a tank top thing. It wasn’t like a whole outfit. So as soon as I realize that I try and take it back and it just gets so awkward. I basically spent the rest of the meal wanting to sink into a hole in the floor. And to top things off, when I got up to leave, I knocked over a glass of water and it went all over her lap.”

Hannah begins to laugh and my eyes narrow. What good is she.

“It’s NOT funny.”

“I’m sorry. I know. But when did you become so socially awkward?”

“You know I make bad first impressions with boyfriend’s parents.”

“Yeah but they usually don’t involve insulting the mother’s taste in clothing and dumping water on her.”

I groan and take my hand off the steering wheel briefly to pinch the bridge of my nose. The headache that’s been there all lunch is progressively getting worse. “I know. I don’t know what happened. I was just so nervous meeting her.”

“Why?”

“Because Justin’s the biggest mama’s boy I’ve ever met and he’s golden in her eyes. I feel like she thinks no girl is good enough for him.”

“I’m sure that’s not true. He’s lucky to have you.”

I don’t acknowledge Hannah’s compliment. “Plus it’s way too soon to be meeting his mother.”

“Is it?”

“It’s been like three weeks. That’s too soon.”

“Isn’t it more like a month and a half?”

“Since we’ve known each other. Not since we’ve been dating. It’s insanely soon.”

“When I was going out with Ryan, he introduced me to his parents on the second date. Trust me, three weeks isn’t that bad.”

“It is to me. It feels like Justin’s rushing into it.”

“You just have a phobia to commitment.”

I roll my eyes. “I do not.”

Hannah laughs. “Oh please, Cassandra. You do so. You always have.”

I reach my house and park my car in the driveway. “It’s not a phobia. I’m just cautious.”

“Uh huh.”

Grabbing my bags from the backseat, I get out of my car and walk to the door. “I might have a small aversion to commitment but only when it comes too fast. And Justin’s all about commitment. I’ve never met a guy who wants to get serious so fast.”

“Most girls wouldn’t be opposed to that.”

“I’ve just never been like that.”

“I know. So what are you going to do?”

Balancing everything in one hand, I unlock the front door and step inside. “There’s nothing I can do. I’m just hoping Lynn doesn’t absolutely hate me and talk Justin out of dating me.”

“I hardly think that’s going to happen.”

“Probably not. But you know how I like to make things dramatic.”

Hannah laughs. “Exactly.”

I say goodbye to her a few minutes later so she can get back to the homework I had pulled her away from. I’m still completely stressed out about the disastrous lunch date with Justin and Lynn and needing to calm myself down, I take my new fabrics to my sewing room and sit down in front of my drawing board.

With all of the excitement of moving and opening a new store, I haven’t really had a chance to draw or sew lately. I figure since I’m opening an entire store of my designs, I should probably get some new ones going. Plus, I’ve missed it like crazy.

I’m completely in a zone as I finish drawing a dress and begin to move it from paper to actual fabric. The ringing of my doorbell rudely interrupts me and I frown as I look up from the fabric I’m measuring. I decide to ignore, figuring it can’t be THAT important, but when it rings again, I immediately know who it is and know that I need to answer it.

“You know, you take a really long time to answer your door,” Justin says as he steps past me into the house when I open the door.

I shut the door behind him and pull out the elastic that’s holding my hair away from my face. “I was working.”

“Oh.” His eyes glance quickly around the room before resting on me. “So my mom-”

“Absolutely hates me?” I finish, trying to smile a bit. It doesn’t work.

He gives me a strange look. “No. My mom doesn’t hate anyone.”

I sigh and begin to walk back to my sewing room. Justin follows. “I called her the wrong name, insulted her fashion sense, and spilt water all over her lap,” I say, cringing at the memory of the lunch. “I’m pretty sure she was less than impressed.”

I walk in the door of the room and go for my chair but Justin somehow beats me to it and sits.

“I told her you weren’t yourself because you’re really busy with work and stressed out with the renovations at the store.”

“That’s not true.”

“I know. But that’s what I told her.” He leaned forward to grab my hands and then pulled me to stand in front of him. “You definitely weren’t yourself at lunch today.”

“Wasn’t I?”

He gives me a look. I know I might be being just a bit difficult but I’m still trying to get over this stupid lunch and I don’t want to relive it.

“What’s going on?”

I sigh and lean back against the desk behind me. “Meeting your mom was just a bit nervewracking.”

“Why?” he asks and by the look on his face I can tell that he can’t imagine anyone not loving his mother to death.

“Because you and her are so close and if she doesn’t like me…well that’s not good.”

He smiles and squeezes my hand. “She likes you because I like you. She knows I have excellent taste in women.”

A small smile tugs at my lips. “I probably should have warned you that I make horrible first impressions with parents.”

“It really wasn’t as bad as you’re making it out to be,” he assures me.

“Even if it was you wouldn’t tell me.”

“Probably not. But it wasn’t. Really. After you left Mom said you seemed really nice and maybe just a bit frazzled. Which you were.”

“I was hoping it wasn’t completely obvious.”

“It wasn’t as bad as you think it was,” he says with a smile and tugs on my arms until I straighten. His arms go around my waist and he pulls me down onto his lap. “Mom wants you to come over for dinner tomorrow night if you can handle it.”

The thought alone terrifies me but I know I should probably give it another shot. “As long as I don’t come in contact with any liquid that could be spilt.”

He lets out a deep laugh and I manage to smile as I lean my head against his shoulder. Being here with him I can almost forget about lunch.

Almost.

“Cassandra Reyna? I’m Kyle Pitman.”

I have to stare at the man standing in front of me for a few long seconds before recognition dawns. “Right! Susan told me about you.” I hold the door to the store open wider. “Come in.” I wait until he is in the store and then shut the door behind him and begin to walk towards the back of the store where my temporary office is. “Sorry about the mess,” I say over my shoulder. “They’re still kind of in the middle of everything.”

“It’s no problem.”

I quickly clear some of my junk off the chair in the room. “Have a seat.”

“This is a really great store you have,” he comments as he settles himself in the chair. “Great location.”

I sit down in my desk chair. “I know. I’m glad I was able to snatch it up.” Pushing away some hair from my face, I take a deep breath. “So why don’t you tell me about yourself?”

He begins to talk and I take the opportunity to really examine him. Susan has been raving about this guy since I decided to open my own store. She’s told me that if I hire him as store manager, he’ll do wonders for business. Considering she’s never done wrong, I could probably just take Susan’s word for it and simply hire him but I figure I should meet with him just to make sure.

He’s telling me about his background in retail and I’m trying to listen but at the same time, trying to discretely size him up.

He’s probably five or six years older than me and his appearance is impeccable. Good build, his teeth are perfectly straight and white, a nice tan to his skin, and not a hair on his head is out of place. He’s dressed simply in a pair of jeans and button down but in my head I can easily picture him in a suit and running my store. He’s completely articulate in his speech and within two minutes I know Susan was one hundred percent right about him. I could probably just cut him off right here and tell him he’s hired but he has a nice voice and honestly, I’m really just content to sit here and listen to him talk.

I stopped him after fifteen minutes or so and told him he had the job. The next thirty minutes were spent sorting out the terms of his employment and then he wanted to see some of my sketches. I was too happy to oblige and a good portion of the afternoon I spent with Kyle, showing him all the designs I plan to fill my store with on opening day.

Near five o’clock Kyle leaves after we make an appointment to get together again in a few days and I’m left in the store by myself. The construction workers have left for the day and I take a few minutes to simply stand in the front of the store and take it all in.

Everything is going so smoothly and perfectly and the renovations of the store are almost done. Every once in a while I get this thrill as I realize that I’m about to open my own store on Rodeo Drive. I really have made it as a fashion designer.

I could probably stand here forever in my own little dream world but it’s getting late and I need to go. I have that dinner with Justin and Lynn tonight and I cannot be late…again. That would probably seal my fate.

I grab everything I need and then lock up the store for the day and get into my car. As I’m pulling out onto the street, I dial Susan Kelly’s number on my cell phone.

“Did Kyle come see you today?” Susan asks as way of a greeting.

“Hey. Yeah. He’s amazing!”

“You hired him then.”

“The minute he opened his mouth I was ready to hire him,” I reply. “He’s going to be perfect. I owe you so much for sending him my way.”

“Don’t thank me. I mentioned to him that you needed a store manager and he jumped at the chance. Even without me I’m sure he would have found a way to you eventually. Are you still at the store?”

“I just left. I’m going over to Justin’s to try dinner with the mother part two.”

“Part two?”

“Part one didn’t go so well.”

“Are you bringing a gift?”

I smile. Not only is Susan a wizard at everything that is fashion, she is the queen of manners. “I have a bottle of wine.”

“Excellent. So did you get my email about the invitations for the grand opening?”

“Yeah. I like the second option you had there. Let’s go with that.”

“Perfect. I’ll have them made up. I’ll email you the final guest list.”

“Sounds good. Are you still planning on coming out here next week?”

“I bought the plane ticket today.”

“Great.”

“I need to go, Cassandra, but I’ll call you tomorrow, alright?”

“Sure.”

“And I’m just sending that email now.”

“Okay. Thanks so much, Susan.”

“Not a problem. Bye.”

I hang up my phone and drop it back in my purse and then concentrate on the road in front of me. My new goal is to make it on the freeway without getting honked at, sworn at, or given the finger. And talking on my phone probably isn’t the best way to reach my goal.

I was fine when I left the store but by time I’m driving up Justin’s driveway, my heart rate has doubled. After the disastrous lunch, I NEED to make a good impression or this woman is going to think I’m a complete moron.

When I was twenty, I went through this phase where I was really into meditation. I don’t think it’s ever come in more handy than now as I sit in my car and take some deep, calming breaths. Within a couple minutes I’m feeling much less stressed out and I get out of my car and take even steps to the door, not allowing myself to hesitate. Justin answers the door moments after I ring the bell. His smiling face soothes my nerves a little bit more.

“You’re early,” he comments, ushering me inside.

“I figured I better be after being late yesterday,” I reply.

He laughs and leans down to give me a quick kiss. He tastes minty and it lingers on my lips as he pulls away. His hand slips around me and rubs lightly at the small of my back.

“How was your day?”

“Really great. I hired a store manager.”

“Oh yeah? Who is it?”

“This guy that Susan recommended. He’s really great. He has so many amazing ideas for the store.”

“That’s awesome.”

“What did you do all day?”

His face screws up a bit. “Mom made me help her clean the house.”

“I thought you had a housekeeper.”

“I do. But that’s a waste of money when I have two perfectly good hands that are able to pick up a vacuum cleaner and duster.” He gives a slight smile. “Or so I’ve been told.”

I laugh. “Well it’s true.”

“Maybe.” His hand slides from my back and picks up my hand. “We’re having spaghetti for supper.”

“Sounds good.” I hold up the bottle of wine. “I brought wine.”

He smiles and takes it from me. “Great.”

His hand gives me a tug towards the kitchen and I trail behind him. I can hear the sound of someone moving around in there and when we round the corner, I see Lynn standing in front of the stove, stirring a pot of tomato sauce. She looks up when we appear.

“Hi, Cassandra.”

I give my most winning smile. This dinner is going to be different than yesterday’s lunch. “Hi. It smells great in here.”

Lynn smiles and replaces the lid on the pot. “Thank you. Nothing like some home cooking after a long day.”

“Can I do anything to help?”

“Oh no. Everything’s basically done. I’m just waiting on the pasta to finish.”

Justin pulls out one of the stools from under the island counter and motions for me to sit. I lower myself onto it and clench my hands in my lap as a silence falls over us. Before it can linger too long, Justin jumps in.

“Is the painting done at the store yet?”

“Almost. They just have some retouching to do.”

“Then you’ve got to decorate it, right?”

“Yeah. Susan is going to help me with that.”

“Didn’t you say your mom is an interior decorator? You should get her to help.”

Justin clearly hasn’t met my mom yet or he wouldn’t suggest that. “Her taste isn’t quite right for what I had in mind.”

The phone rings before he can pursue the subject and he excuses himself to go answer it. Unfortunately, Lynn picks up right where he left off.

“So your mother’s an interior decorator? That must be interesting.”

“She really enjoys it.”

“You said your parents live in San Francisco?”

“My mom lives there with my stepdad.” I expect her to ask about my father but that particular question doesn’t come up.

“Any siblings?”

What is with this woman and family? “One younger sister and two stepbrothers.”

“Are they in San Francisco?”

My fingers start to tap against my thigh and my eyes dart to the doorway. Justin’s leaning against the frame, his back to us, talking on the phone. I stare at the back of his head, silently willing him to get off the phone and come back. I can’t take all these questions. “My stepbrothers do. My sister, Elodie, lives in San Diego.”

“Married?”

“Mm hmm.” I can predict the next question so I simply answer it. “She and her husband have a six month old baby girl.”

“Oh, that’s nice. What’s her name?”

“Emma.”

“That’s sweet. Do you see them often?”

“As much as I can.”

“It must be hard with such a busy schedule. Especially with opening a store.”

I nod. “Yeah, it is. Once everything’s calmed down a bit I’m planning on going out there and seeing them.”

“And it will be easier to get there now that you’re living in LA. That’s not such a bad drive to San Diego.”

I smile and nod. I can’t take many more questions. Especially questions about my family.

“So your step-”

“That was Rachel,” Justin says, interrupting Lynn and my eyes close briefly as I say a prayer of thanks. “Do we have enough food for her if she comes over?”

“Sure,” Lynn replies. “Is she close by?”

“She said she’d be like fifteen minutes and not to wait for her to start.”

“Alright. Because everything’s about done.”

I push the stool back. “I’m just going to go wash my hands before we eat.”

I make a quick exit from the kitchen and get to the bathroom as fast as possible. I shut myself in there and sit on the closed toilet seat. The meditation and deep breathing makes a comeback.

The worst is over. Lynn has hopefully gotten all the question about my family out of the way and now Justin will be there to help water down any further interrogation. I understand that this woman wants the best for her son and wants to know about my background but honestly. There is such a thing as too many questions.

I’m just finishing washing my hands when there’s a knock on the door followed by Justin’s voice quietly calling my name. I open the door.

“You okay?” he asks, stepping into the bathroom with me and pushing the door shut behind him.

I take a deep breath and nod. “I’m good. It was just a lot of questions.”

“I figured. She just wants to get to know you.”

“I know.”

“I told her to lay off a bit.”

I give him a small smile. “Thanks.”

“All the food’s done. Are you ready to eat?”

Another deep breath. “Yeah.” I raise my hand to run my fingers through my hair but Justin catches it before it can reach my head and pulls it back down.

“Don’t be so nervous.”

I stare at him and can’t help but smile a bit. I hadn’t realized he had picked up on my nervous habit. “I just don’t want her to hate me.”

“Don’t be stupid. She doesn’t hate you. She likes you.” He brings my hand up to his mouth and kisses the back of it. “And after getting to know you as well as I do she’s going to love you.”

I feel like his words could be taken a very scary way for a commitment wary person such as myself but instead of analyzing it too much, I let it drop. “Okay.”

He opens the door and pulls me out of the bathroom, draping his arm around my shoulders as we walk to the kitchen. We all sit down to eat and it isn’t so bad. The firing of questions has stopped and I find myself able to fall into somewhat normal conversation with Lynn. And for the first time I feel like maybe, just maybe, we might end up getting along just fine.

“Cass, seriously, stop sewing and come to bed.”

I look up from the fabric in front of me at Justin’s mumbled words and see him leaning against the doorframe, rubbing his eyes. “What time is it?” I question, going back to the dress.

“Late. Come to bed.”

“I’m right in the middle of the hem. I want to finish. I’ll only be like an hour.”

A groan escapes him and when I look up again, he’s gone from the doorway. I briefly consider calling after him but quickly disregard the idea. He was the one who kept hinting that he wanted to sleep over and I warned him that I had to do some work. He shouldn’t be so surprised that he’s alone in there.

I don’t even know why he wanted to stay over in the first place. Well, okay, so maybe I slept over at his house last night but that was just because I was so tired and didn’t think I could make the drive back to my house. And I’ll admit, it was a pretty good sleep. I thought my bed was comfortable but his brings comfort to a whole new level. And when I woke up and Justin was laying beside me, snoring lightly, it felt pretty good.

Somehow that translated into tonight and now Justin is upstairs laying in my bed. A voice in my head is telling me I’m being pretty stupid sitting downstairs with my sewing machine when I could be with him, curled up in bed, but I really do need to get this dress done. The opening of my store is approaching quickly and I still have a few key pieces that I need to have done for the grand opening. And it’s going to involve some late nights in order to get everything finished.

My eyes stray back to the doorway and my hands still on the fabric. I know I’m almost done with the hem but it feels like it’s never going to be finished. I want to go upstairs. Justin looked pretty good standing there wearing only a t shirt and a pair of flannel pajama pants hanging low off his hips. I’ve come to the conclusion that he can make any article of clothing look good. He should have become a model. Any designer would love working with his body.

I give my head a shake and force myself to concentrate on the dress instead of Justin’s body. I’m never going to get anything done if I don’t focus on what’s in front of me. Still, even as I tell myself to concentrate on this hem, my thoughts wander back to the individual in the room above this.

I was a little wary about sleeping over at his house yesterday, not really knowing what that would entail. It’s been a month since we’ve started going out and I feel like I’m ready for all the physical aspects of our relationship to happen but last night I was so tired and really, I’m so girly at heart and I really just want the first time with Justin to be special not just because it’s convenient. I’ve never actually communicated this to him but I figure that since nothing really happened last night even though there was ample opportunity, he feels the same way. I’m really lucky to have found a guy like him.

I pull my bottom lip in between my teeth as I finish the last tricky part of the hem and a smile pulls on my lips. I love the feeling when I finish something I’ve been working on for so long. It’s such a satisfying feeling I can’t even describe it.

Standing, I stretch my body, cramped from leaning over the table for so long, and then slip the dress over a bustform in the corner of the room. The room’s a bit of a mess but I can deal with it tomorrow. Now that I’m finished, tiredness suddenly lands on me and I’m fighting to keep my eyes open. I’m surprised when I check my watch and find that it’s almost three in the morning. Oops. I hope Justin wasn’t actually expecting it to only take an hour when he came down at midnight.

I shut off the lights in my sewing room and then make my way upstairs as quietly as possible. Ever since I was a little kid I’ve been a night owl and I’ve become pretty good at moving around in the middle of the night without waking up anyone else in the house.

I find some pajamas and change in the bathroom and quickly wash my face and brush my teeth. When I reenter my bedroom, I’m faced with a problem I hadn’t expected. Justin had fallen asleep in my bed, completely in the center and was kind of sprawled out so there wasn’t really a lot of room for me. Standing at the edge of the bed, I try and decide the best way to get him to move would be.

My nose wrinkles a bit at the thought of disturbing his sleep but this morning I found out he’s a deadweight when he’s sleeping and I know I won’t be able to easily move him to one side of the bed.

Giving his shoulder a nudge, I whisper his name in the dark. With no response, I sigh and move the covers away from his body. There’s just enough room for me to slip in beside him. I can’t guarantee that I won’t fall out of bed in the middle of while I’m sleeping but I really don’t want to wake him up when he seems to be in such a deep sleep.

My thinking that he’s in a deep sleep dies when I slide in beside him and almost instantly his feet jerk a bit and his head rolls to the side. I look up at him and watch his eyes slowly open. He lets out a groan.

“What time is it?” he asks, starting to raise his upper body to see the alarm clock.

I pull him back down before he can see that it’s past three in the morning and how I’m two hours late to when I told him I’d be in bed. “Sorry. I didn’t mean to wake you up.”

“Your feet are freezing,” he mumbles, turning on his side.

I burrow my face into the soft cotton of his t shirt. “Sorry. It’s kind of cold downstairs.”

His one arm goes around me and his fingers lightly graze the skin of my back, under the camisole I’m wearing. “Did you get your hem finished?”

The question makes me smile knowing he honestly doesn’t care that much because only a fellow designer would have any interest involving a hem. “Mm hmm. One more dress done.” I shift a bit and can feel the edge of the bed impossibly close to me. “Can you move over? I’m right on the edge.”

He drags himself across the bed, pulling me with him. Once we’re both firmly situated, I let my eyes close again. It’s bad how good this feels to be laying here with him. If it feels this good, I’m never going to want to sleep alone again.

“So are you going to play hooky tomorrow and spend the day with me?”

I smile at his question. Every night I talk to him he asks me that. I don’t think he really ever expects me to say yes, but he asks anyways. “Not tomorrow.”

“What are tomorrow’s big plans?”

I yawn into his chest and tentatively move my feet towards his, hoping they’ve warmed up a bit. When they make contact with his feet and he doesn’t flinch or pull them away, I allow my legs to tangle with his. “I’m going shopping with Kyle for some furniture for the store.”

“I thought you were hiring an interior decorator for that.”

“That’s what Susan said to do but Kyle’s done some work with interior decorating.”

“Why is he being your store manager if he does interior decorating?”

“He’s not an actual interior decorator. He just has some experience in it. Besides I pretty much know what I want to do with the store so there’s no point paying someone to come in and give me ideas I don’t need.”

“I guess. You must have picked up a lot of ideas for interior decorating from your mom.”

“A bit.”

“Is your mom planning on coming out to LA for the opening of the store?”

I inwardly sigh. I know that Justin wants to know more about my family and every once in a while he’ll ask me questions about them. Luckily he doesn’t press too much, probably because he saw how much anxiety I got from his mom interrogating me about them. Usually after a few questions he drops the topic.

“She has a conference that week so she can’t.”

“Too bad. I’d like to meet her.”

I breathe out a laugh. “No you don’t.”

It’s quiet for a minute before Justin pulls his upper body back a bit and I raise my eyes to find him looking down at me. From the moonlight coming in the window, I can make out his eyes examining mine.

“You know, one day you’re going to have to tell me about your family.”

The thought is not appealing. “One day I probably will,” I say as vaguely as possible.

“Families really shape who a person becomes,” he says.

That thought is even less appealing. “I hope not because then I must be really screwed up.”

He smiles. “You’re so dramatic.”

“You don’t know my family,” I reply. “You don’t even know the kind of crazy I’m working with.”

He laughs and pulls me back close to him. I move my body up on the bed a bit so my head is more level with his. He’s closed his eyes but they open again when I lean forward to briefly kiss him. His eyes smile at me and he brings his face close to mine to kiss me back. He pulls back after a minute and I relax my head into my pillow and close my eyes.

“I can’t believe you were working on that dress until three in the morning.”

My eyes open again. I guess he managed to look at the clock. “It took longer than I thought it would,” I reply. “Sorry. I didn’t mean to leave you alone in bed.”

He brings his face close to mine, touching his nose to mine. “Promise it won’t happen again?” he smiles.

With him this close to me, the thought of ever choosing sewing over being in bed with him seems incredibly foolish. I return his smile and move my hand until I’m clutching his shoulder, keeping him close to me. “Promise.”

* * *

Sometimes it’s easy to fall into this fantasy world where nobody cares about what I’m doing and my private life is kept private. That fantasy is usually broken by a call from Cal Friedman, my public relation guy.

“Want to fill me in on Cassandra Reyna?”

“Why do you need to know about her?”

“Because there’s an article about the two of you in US Weekly and I need to know if we’re commenting on this or not.”

I sigh and run my hand over my face. “We’re dating.”

“And is this going to be made public?”

“What did the article say?”

“I scanned it and emailed it over to you.”

Getting up from the couch, I begin to walk towards my office. “Hang on. I’m going to go look at it.”

It really should come as a shock that the press is finally catching on to Cassie and my relationship. We don’t go out a huge amount and I’ve never been aware of any pictures being taken of us together but this is LA and people talk. It was only a matter of time.

My email loads up and I click on the message from Cal. My nose wrinkles in distaste as I quickly scan over the article and pictures. They have a picture of us eating at Carrabba’s in New York but that’s obviously old. The only other pictures are of Cassie. At first I think that she had no idea her picture was being taken but in the last one of her, she’s looking directly at the camera.

“Are you looking at it?”

“Yeah I see it.”

“There’s nothing concrete in there and if you want to deny it I can do that. But you might want to consider how beneficial that will be if this relationship is serious.”

I pinch the bridge of my nose and grimace. I knew everything was going too perfect. I knew I couldn’t keep her to myself for too much longer. “Can you just leave it for now? I have to talk to her about it.”

“Sure but get back to me. Heads up next time would be great too.”

I roll my eyes as I hang up the phone. Cal expects me to call him every time I even look at a girl. I hate getting PR involved in my relationship because it just makes everything so complicated.

Checking my watch, I decide that Cassie should still be at the store if I go there now. I grab my car keys from the kitchen counter and a minute later I’m on my way to Rodeo Drive.

Questions are flying through my head the entire drive. If Cassie knew she was suddenly getting her picture taken by paparazzi why didn’t she say anything? You would think that it’s something you would mention, especially when you’re not used to it.

Cassie keeps stuff to herself though. Sometimes getting any information out of her is like pulling teeth. I know that there’s stuff in her past that’s made her slightly closed off but who knows if I’ll ever find out what that is. She has this way of changing the subject whenever I ask her about something she doesn’t want to talk about.

Whether she wants to talk about getting her picture taken or not, we have to talk about it. Unfortunately, dating me kind of requires dating the media because they hound me and whoever I happen to be dating. She needs to know that.

When I get to the store, I call Cassie’s number. She picks up after the third ring.

“Hello?”

“Hey. I’m outside. Can you let me in?”

“Sure. Hang on.”

I only have to wait for a few seconds before the front door opens and I see Cassie.

“What are you doing here?” she asks as she ushers me into the store.

“I need to talk to you,” I state. There’s a man and woman standing in the corner of the store looking through a photo album but I ignore them and pull Cassie through the store to the back part where her office is.

“Slow down,” she says, pulling her hand away from my grasp. “What’s wrong?”

I make sure the door’s closed before speaking. “Do you read US Weekly?”

“I try and read more stimulating things.”

“My PR guy called and there’s an article about us in there.”

Her brow furrows a bit. “Really?”

I cross the room to her desk and upload the email from Cal. When it pops up, I gesture for her to come over and point to it. I watch her face for a reaction as she glances over it but her expression remains pretty neutral.

“Who exactly are the sources they cite in here?” she asks after she’s finished, looking up at me.

“No one. Just people being paid to say things.”

Both her hands run through her hair. “So I guess our relationship is a public thing now?”

“It doesn’t have to be. Cal can deny it and say we’re friends or some shit.”

Her hands slip into the back pockets of her jeans. “Is that what you want?”

Sighing, I lean back against the edge of the desk. “It would be easier to do that now but it’s kind of inevitable that we’re going to have to make it public at some point. We can’t hide it forever.”

“Then let’s not bother and just come out with it. It can’t be that bad.”

She’s a bit naïve when it comes to Hollywood. “It can be pretty bad.”

She shrugs and smiles. “Well are you worth it?” she asks, a teasing tone laced in her question.

My lips begin to curl up. “I like to think so.”

“Then let’s just go with it,” she says. “I don’t care who knows.”

This surprises me a bit since I’ve come to the conclusion that she has this thing about commitment and being publicly linked to someone is a big step in the commitment area. I’m not going to question it though. “Okay. I’ll call Cal and tell him.”

She steps towards me and loops her arms around my neck. I smile down at her and rub my hands up and down her back.

“There’s worse things in the world than being romantically linked to Justin Timberlake,” she says, her thumbs rubbing the back of my neck. It feels great and I could easily fall into her embrace but my earlier questions come back to mind.

“Cass?”

“Hm?”

“Why didn’t you tell me that the paparazzi were taking your picture?”

Her eyes examine mine and I press on.

“You were looking right into the camera on that last picture. You had to have known someone was taking your picture.”

“A short guy with a huge camera is kind of hard to miss,” she responds.

“Why didn’t you tell me?”

She shrugs. “I didn’t think it was important.”

I lean my head down and rest my forehead against hers. “It is. You should tell me those things.”

“I thought you’d get upset about it,” she says. “And I was right because I can tell you’re upset even now.”

I frown. “I just hate the intrusiveness of it all. It pisses me off.”

“Which is why I didn’t tell you. It was just a couple pictures.”

“It’s going to be like this a lot,” I say, a little scared of her reaction. “If we confirm that we’re dating, they’re going to hound you. It’s gonna be overwhelming.”

She rises on her toes and plants a kiss on my nose. “I can handle overwhelming.”

“You’re sure?”

“Stop asking or I’ll change my mind,” she says, and kisses me again, this time her lips meeting mine. I can feel my body relax as she kisses me, all earlier tension flowing out of me. I know realistically that handling the media is going to be a pain in the ass but while I’m standing here kissing her, it doesn’t seem to matter at all. Anything is worth this moment right now.

She pulls away after a minute, leaving me wanting more, like her kisses always do. Her hands move to the sides of my head and she smiles up at me.

“Now that this is all sorted out, how about we go back out there and you try to make a good first impression for Susan and Kyle?”

My eyes move to the closed door and then back to her. “That’s who’s out there?”

“Mm hmm. And it’s awfully rude of us to be in here while they’re out there.”

“Rude is okay sometimes,” I say, trying to pull her back to me. She merely laughs and gives my stomach a playful smack.

“Come on.”

Smiling, I take her hand and allow her to pull me out into the store, my earlier concerns gone. If Cassie’s not freaked out about it, maybe going public isn’t such a big deal after all.

I’ve come to the conclusion that recording studios are one of the most confusing places in the world to maneuver yourself around in. When you walk in the front door everything seems simple and the cheery receptionist merely pointing to a hallway leads you to believe that finding your destination will be relatively simple. But when one hallway leads into three different hallways and each of those three hallways contains what seems like hundreds of doors, things get complicated. A few signs pointing me in the right direction would help but apparently this is a foreign concept to whoever designed the place.

I’m about to pull out my cell phone and call Justin to get him to come rescue me when a beefy janitor appears. He seems suspicious at first when I ask for him to show me what recording studio Justin is in but then relaxes, probably recognizing me from one of the countless pictures of me that has been displayed in entertainment magazines over the past two weeks. He shows me to the studio I want, but not before making me feel stupid for how effortlessly he found it.

I wait until he leaves before knocking softly on the door. I feel like one day I’m going to barge in and somehow mess up some amazing song that he’s recording or producing or whatever. I actually dreamt that last night and now I’m paranoid that it’s going to happen. It seems like something that would happen to me.

I’m expecting Justin or maybe Trace when the door opens but instead the face of a younger girl greets me. It takes me a minute to place her before I recognize her as Bridget Sparks, the girl that Justin’s producing for.

“Hi,” she says somewhat uncertainly. “Justin’s not here.”

My brow wrinkles. “He’s not?”

“He went to get coffee.”

“Okay.” I wait. Is she planning on making me stand in the hallway?

She opens the door a bit wider and moves to the side. I step into the room and glance around. Usually Trace is with Justin when he’s recording but apparently not today. Just Bridget and I occupy the room and a string of anxiety goes through me. Although I can force myself to make small talk, I absolutely hate it. It completely stresses me out.

Bridget plops down in a chair at the soundbooth and starts picking at her fingernails. I look around the studio again before taking the only other available seat on a chair near her. It’s quiet in the room and I tap my fingers against the chair armrest, trying to fill the silence.

Bridget’s all but ignoring me and I watch as she doodles in the margin of an open notebook. I smile a bit. Her writing is loopy and her i’s are dotted with hearts. She has the kind of writing I always wanted when I was younger. When I was eleven and obsessed with the Baby Sitters Club, I had tried for months to make my writing like Stacey’s before finally realizing it was hopeless. I’ll always have plain writing and there’s nothing I can do to change it.

“Are you writing a song?” I finally ask, needing to break the loud silence.

Bridget’s head jerks up, clearly surprised that I’m asking her a question. She grabs the notebook and clutches it to her chest before nodding. “Yeah.”

Her voice is soft and guarded and I would think that she really hated me except that I remember that Justin had mentioned that this girl was painfully shy. I decided to take no offence and try and keep some type of conversation going.

“So how’s your album coming along? Are you guys getting a lot done?”

She nods and is silent for a moment before speaking. “Justin says we’re about halfway done.”

“That’s great. He’s said a few times how talented you are.”

She perks up at my words and her head lifts up to look at me. “Really?”

She has such an obviously huge crush on him. It’s kind of cute. “Mm hmm. He says you have a great voice for someone so young.”

She blushes and goes back to her fingernails, her feet on the ground spinning her chair back and forth.

“How long ago did Justin leave?” I ask. I know I’ve only been here a few minutes but it feels like it’s been hours.

“A while ago.”

“So he should be back soon?”

She shrugs and I can’t help but let a small sigh escape me. Getting this girl to talk is like pulling teeth. I’m tempted to simply give up but decide to give it one more try.

“So are you from LA?”

Her eyes still don’t meet mine but at least she answers. “I’m from Chicago.”

“Oh really? So did you just move here then?”

“I’m staying with my uncle because my mom can’t afford to move to LA yet.”

“Oh. That must be hard.”

She nods and is silent again. I can’t force myself to ask any more questions at this point and neither can I simply sit here. Needing to do something, I pull out my sketchpad from my bag and open to a fresh page. I’ve just started drawing the silhouette to a dress when Bridget’s voice breaks the silence.

“What are you drawing?”

I glance up to find her intently watching me. A little surprised at her sudden interest, I lower my pad a bit so she can see. “Just an idea for a dress.”

The look on her face tells me that she brimming over with a hundred questions but before even one can reach the surface, the door opens and Justin enters the room, balancing two cups of coffee in one hand and the other hand fiddling with his cell phone. He glances up and when his eyes land on me his entire face lights up and he snaps his phone shut.

“Hey. What are you doing here?”

I put my sketchpad away and stand up. “I needed to get away from the store.” One of the cups in his hand is dangerously close to falling and I quickly grab it. He smiles his thanks and then hands the cup he’s still holding to Bridget.

“I know you said you didn’t want anything but I got you a hot chocolate anyways.”

A smile takes over her entire face. “Thanks!”

He turns his attention back to me. “Can you stay for a while or…?”

“For a bit. Kyle’s interviewing for a sales position and I’m just in the way.”

“That I find hard to believe.”

I smile and open my mouth to retort but before I can say anything, the ringing of a cell phone cuts through the air. We both turn to the sound and find Bridget digging through her bag.

“Sorry, it’s my mom,” she says and then slips past us and out of the room. As soon as the door’s closed behind her, I turn back to Justin.

“That girl is incredibly shy,” I state.

He winces a bit. “I know. She needs to get out of that or else she’ll never make it in the business. She’s better than she used to be.”

“I think she seriously dislikes me.”

He rolls his eyes. “I hardly think anyone could seriously dislike you,” he says, sitting on the very edge of the soundboard. I smile as he puts his hands on my hips and pulls me to stand in between his legs. “What gave you that impression?”

“She just would hardly talk to me.”

One hand leaves my hips and takes the coffee I’m still holding. He brings it up to his lips and takes a sip before responding. “She’s just shy.” A twinkle appears in his eyes. “Or maybe she sees you as competition.”

I laugh. “Probably. She has the hots for you.”

“Well who wouldn’t.”

I laugh again and roll my eyes at his cocky voice. “Uh huh.”

He gives my hip a squeeze and then moves his hand to my lower back, pulling me a bit closer to him. “Want to go for dinner tonight?”

“Mm…how about you come over to my place and I’ll make you something? I have food I need to use up or it’ll go bad.”

He shrugs and drinks some more coffee. “Okay.”

My eyes move across the room before returning to him. “Did I tell you about my sister?”

“What about her?”

“Her husband, Chris, got transferred to LA. So they’re moving here.”

“Really? When?”

“They’re coming here next week to house hunt. His company wants him up here as soon as possible though so it should be soon.”

“Now I’m going to use what little I know about your family and say that you’re closest with your sister, right?”

I smile a bit at his subtle jab that I still haven’t told him much about my messed up family. “Yeah. And I’ll be able to see my niece all the time if they live up here.”

“So is your sister going to like me?”

I pretend to ponder that but can’t hold back a laugh when Justin frowns. “Of course she will. You make excellent first impressions.”

His face brightens. “Do I?”

I lean my body more into him and run my hands up his sides. I’ve grown to love touching him. His body is always solid and warm and being against him gives me a sense of security. And it’s so reassuring to have a person like that with me. It only took me a few weeks in LA to realize how fickle people in this city are. It’s hard to find a real person here who you don’t have to constantly watch yourself around. I love having someone like Justin who I know isn’t out to screw me around and who I can say anything to and not have to worry about it.

“You act like you don’t know how good you are at charming people,” I smile, looping my arms loosely around his neck.

A grin stretches across his face and he dips his head down to kiss me, leaving a coffee taste in my mouth when he pulls back. “I got the invitation for the store opening today.”

I perk up. “Really? Awesome. I was hoping they’d get to everyone quickly.”

“Did you invite a lot of people?”

“About a hundred. Some of them won’t be able to come though. Any more and it would have been too crowded in there.”

“Did you invite any of your family or friends from Seattle?”

“My friend Hannah is coming up a couple days after the opening because she has her last exam on the day of the opening. And I sent invitation to my family but they’re not entirely into fashion so I’m thinking I probably won’t get any RSVPs from them.”

“Not even your sister?”

“Emma’s only six months old so it’s a lot to travel with her.”

“I guess.” He sets his coffee to the side and then joins his now free hand to the other one on my back. I smile a bit when he slides them down to rest in the back pockets of my jeans. “I really want to meet some of your people though.”

I smile at his words. “My people?”

“Sure. You’ve met my mom, you know Trace, Rachel. Those are my people.”

“You met Susan and Kyle.”

“Yeah but they’re business associates. I want to meet people who know you outside of work.”

“Well you can meet Hannah when she comes out here. She’s staying for a week.” I go on my toes and press my lips to the line of his jaw. “And trust me, besides Elodie, you don’t want to meet my family.”

He leans his head down and a shiver goes through me when his lips burn a trail from my chin to my ear. “Yes I do. I can handle your family as crazy as you think they are.”

My eyes flutter shut but I quickly snap them open again. He may be a charmer but charming won’t work on anyone but Elodie. My mom’s more than a bit of a bitch and my stepbrothers are lazy slobs. Don’t even get me started on my stepfather, Grant. He’s got the personality of a wet noodle. It’s hard for someone like Justin, who is incredibly tight knit with his family, to realize that not everyone’s family is like that. And as charming as he can be, my mom is still going to tear him to shreds and Grant is going to critique Justin’s career as much as he can. I’d like to say they do it because they’re looking out for me but I honestly think they just get pleasure out of being rude.

“Justin…” I begin to protest but can’t get much further than that with his lips still connected to my neck.

He bites gently on my ear lobe before pulling back. “Seriously. I want to meet your family. Even if they’re all horrible excuses for human beings, I want to at least have met them. It’s important to me.”

“I know,” I sigh. “I promise I’ll eventually introduce to you to every single deranged member of my family. But I’m going to protect you from them for as long as possible.”

“When I meet them I’m going to win them all over and you’re going to wonder why you tried so hard to keep me from meeting them.”

I give a small smile even though I know his words are untrue. He may believe them, but I’ve lived with my family for twenty four years and I know how they work. They won’t be won over by charm.

I guess I had moved back a bit because Justin pulls me back into him by his hands on my butt and I have to put my hands on his shoulders to keep from stumbling into him. He smiles and leans his head down to kiss me.

“Have I ever mentioned how much I like when you randomly come and visit me at the studio?” he asks against my lips.

I smile and move my hands to hold the sides of his head. “I’m not in the way?”

His lips brush against mine again. “Never.”

I don’t know how long we stand there just letting our lips meet over and over but the sound of the door opening brings me back to the present and I pull my head back just as Bridget enters the room. She blanches a bit when she sees us together and Justin’s hands pull from my back pockets. I step back and to the side, letting him straighten.

“Sorry,” Bridget says, her voice almost a whisper.

“No problem,” Justin says casually, picking up is coffee again. “How’s your mom?”

Bridget shrugs. “She’s good. She just wanted to see how recording’s going.”

“Did you tell her how amazing you’re doing?”

She blushes and plays with her cup. “Yeah right.”

He laughs. “Want to warm up a bit and then we’ll finish up the song?”

She nods and then disappears into the soundbooth. Justin turns to me once we’re alone in the room again. “So are you going back to the store before you go home?”

“I should. See how Kyle’s interview went. I’ve been there since six this morning though so I don’t think I can stay too long.”

Justin’s hands circle my hips and he pulls me a little closer to him. “Once the store’s open are you going to have some more free time? I feel like we’re hardly seeing each other because you’re there so much.”

His words are true. Actually, today is the first time I’ve seen him in four days. We talk on the phone a few times per day but it’s not the same as actually seeing him. It’s so hard though when there’s such a limited time frame that I have to get everything done for the grand opening. Sometimes I’m at the store so early and stay so late that the only thing I can think of is going to bed.

“Things will calm down once it’s been opened for a couple weeks,” I reassure him. “And then I won’t need to be there so much and I’ll have more free time.”

He gives a small sigh but nods. Smiling, I raise up on my toes and give him a quick kiss.

“And you’re coming over tonight.”

His face brightens a bit at that. “I’ll just come over when I’m done here.”

“What time do you think?”

“Maybe around six. I’ll call when I’m leaving.”

“Perfect.” I lean up to kiss him again and this time he keeps me against him a bit longer. I force myself to pull back after a minute and brush my thumb over his lower lip. “I’ll see you tonight.”

He nods and kisses me once more and squeezes my hips before letting me go. I grab my stuff and leave the studio quickly, eager to go back to the store, see how Kyle’s interview went, and then go home and make dinner for Justin and I.

“You’re sure you’re okay with Emma?”

I pull my eyes away from my niece’s sleeping face up to Elodie. “I’m fine. I have everything I need. You need to go meet Chris and the realtor or you’ll be late.”

Elodie gives a distracted nod and glances around the room. “I put bottles in the fridge.”

A laugh escapes me at my younger sister. “Yes you did. Go. I’ll see you in a few hours.”

A smile breaks across her lips and she finally grabs her jacket. “Okay. Call me if you need anything.”

“I will,” I promise. “Good luck with the house hunting.”

“We better find one this time,” she says. “I cannot take one more day of looking through other people’s houses.” She begins to walk to the front door, still talking. “If Chris wasn’t so damn indecisive…”

I smile and resume looking at Emma as Elodie’s words fade and are followed by the sound of the front door closing.

I can’t even describe how happy I am to have my sister, brother in law, and niece here for a few days. Elodie is the sane one in my family and seeing her is so refreshing. And although I’ve adjusted to life in LA pretty good, it’s been so long since I’ve seen people that I haven’t just met the past few months. It had been almost four months since I had seen them last and I don’t know how I went that long.

Emma is so much bigger than the last time I saw her and I can’t believe how much she’s changed. Becoming an aunt was one of the highlights of my life and it was killing me knowing that I was missing out on so much of her life. Now that they’re moving to LA, I can see Emma all the time.

I was more than happy to opt out of going to the store and watch Emma instead while Elodie and Chris go look for a house. I swear I’ve been at the store every day for the past week and I need a break before I go crazy. And spending an afternoon with my niece is the perfect way to de-stress.

Emma tenses in my arms, bringing my attention back to her. Her face scrunches up like she’s going to cry but instead a small sigh escapes her tiny rosebud lips and she relaxes. Her playpen is sitting in the middle of the room and I could just put her in there since she’ll probably be sleeping for the next hour or so, but it’s like ever since they got here yesterday, I can’t get enough of holding her.

I’ve always been a little jealous of Elodie’s life. She’s twenty two, three years younger than me, and is already married and has a baby. Everyone in my family was a little worried about her when she got married to Chris when she was only nineteen and he was twenty but their marriage seems to be golden. It’s strange to me that my younger sister is so much more settled than I am. When we were growing up I always thought it would be the other way around. Going to your younger sister when you need relationship advice is weird no matter how you look at it.

Emma sleeps soundly for over an hour before waking up and needing her diaper changed and needing to be fed. I love just holding her and watching her sleep but having her awake and playing with her is even better. She’s so much more interactive now that she’s older and time slips away as we play peek-a-boo and pat-a-cake. I don’t even notice how late it’s getting until I hear a car drive up the driveway. I look away from Emma and to the clock on the wall.

“I wonder if that’s Mommy and Daddy,” I say, pulling myself up off the ground. I reach down and pick her up, resting her weight on my hip. “Do you think they found a house for you to live in?”

Emma’s content with babbling in response to my question and I smile, reaching my hand up to brush her dark hair away from her face. It’s easy to get lost in a child’s simplistic world. If only life could always stay that way.

I’m still in the living room when I hear the front door open. I’m surprised when instead of Elodie or Chris, I hear Justin’s voice call my name. He hadn’t mentioned he was coming over.

“In here,” I call, gently pulling Emma’s hand away from my hair when she gives it a tug. It’s not the first time she’s done it and I’m beginning to realize that I should maybe wear my hair up while I’m around her.

Justin appears in the doorway “Why’s your door unlocked?” The words leave his mouth and then he sees the baby in my arms. “Emma?”

I smile and nod. “This is her. Isn’t she cute?”

His lips turn up and he steps over the toys on the floor to come over to us. “Yeah. Looks a bit like you too.”

“She looks more like my sister than anyone.” I look away from Emma and up to him. “You didn’t say you were coming over.”

He doesn’t reply right away and leans down, kissing me for a minute before pulling back. “I know. I finished early with my manager and thought I’d come see if you were home. Are you babysitting?”

I sit down on the couch. “Yeah. Elodie and Chris are out looking at houses.” I wince a bit when Emma yanks on my hair again. “Can you hold her for a second?”

He sits down next to me and I put Emma in his lap and then pull my hair into a ponytail. When I finish, I pull my legs onto the couch, bringing them to my chest and shift closer to Justin, watching him interact with Emma.

Justin has this way with people of all ages. He can easily talk to people of any age and immediately put them at ease. I shouldn’t be surprised that the same is the case with babies. Emma is showing no stranger anxiety and giggling as he plays with her toes.

“So can I stay and meet your sister and brother in law?”

I settle myself more closely to Justin, resting my head on his shoulder. “Sure.”

“Just like that?”

I smile. “I’m not against you meeting Elodie or Chris. They’re completely normal.” Reaching my hand out, I straighten the front of Emma’s shirt. “What was your meeting about?”

“I got a script to look over.”

I lift my head from his shoulder so I can look at him. “You’re going to do another movie?”

He shrugs. “If I like the script. Once I’m done with Bridget’s album I don’t have much on my plate. I’m not really ready to record another album and get back into all that.”

I nod and lean my head back on his shoulder. The great thing about Justin is he’s so much like me with his work. He always likes to be doing something. He understands when I’m at work all the time and doesn’t complain about it. It’s hard for me, just like it is for him, to take a break.

“How long are Elodie and Chris staying out here?”

“They leave tomorrow night.” Emma starts to fuss so I take her from Justin’s lap and pull her against my chest. “What’s wrong, Em?” She calms down a bit as I bounce her a few times and I pull myself up and put her in her swing so she can occupy herself, stepping over everything scattered on the floor to get back to the couch. I never realized just how much stuff Emma has. Elodie and Chris are staying with me while they’re in LA and within a few hours of them being here the house was littered with various baby products. I’m a bit of a neat freak with my house but I’ve realized I better get used to it if they’re going to be living out here and I’ll be babysitting for them.

A hand encircles mine and I’m pulled back to the couch. Justin brings me down to sit beside him, practically on top of him and I smile when his arms go around me.

“Do you realize it’s been almost a week since we’ve had any time alone?” he asks, his face nuzzling in my neck.

I squirm a bit when his stubble tickles my skin. “I know,” I sigh. Believe me, I know. A week ago we had dinner together at my house but since then I’ve seen him once when he stopped by the store for a few hours and other than that, we’ve talked on the phone and that’s about it.

“I’m still waiting for that day you promised me where we’re going to spend all day in bed.”

I giggle at his words. I had promised him that last week while we were talking on the phone and he was bellyaching about never seeing me. It definitely wasn’t an empty promise because there is nothing I’d rather do than spend a day in bed with him. But it’s going to have to wait until at least next week after the grand opening.

“As soon as I can take a day off we can do that,” I say, snuggling into his side a bit more. Sitting here with him it’s hard to even think about working and being away from him. I love this point in relationships where you can be around the person hours on end and never grow tired of them.

“I’m going to hold you to that.”

I smile and kiss the side of his head. “I thought you might.”

His hands run up and down my sides, leaving shivers going through me. It’s been a while since a simple touch like that can get to me this much. And it’s not always a good thing either. When we’re in public and he does something a simple thing like run his fingers over my palm or slide his hand around my hip, getting all hot and bothered isn’t the best thing.

I’m close to dozing off in his arms when I hear the front door opening and the sounds of Elodie and Chris talking. Before I can pull back, Justin’s already on his feet. Damn. He is REALLY eager to meet them. He waits for me to go out the doorway before following close behind.

Elodie stops talking and her eyes light up when they land on Justin. She’s been almost as bad as Justin with bugging me to let her meet him. Ever since she started dating Chris it’s been her life goal to find me a boyfriend.

She doesn’t even let me do formal introductions before she steps forward. “Well finally. I thought Cassandra was going to keep you all to herself and never introduce you to us.”

Justin smiles. “Well she said you were completely normal so we could meet.”

Elodie’s never been one to be shy and I’m not surprised when she gives Justin a hug. I’m hardly even needed here because as soon as Elodie pulls away from Justin, she’s introducing him to Chris and they’re sharing a handshake. I’m entirely jealous of how easily he falls into conversation with my sister and brother in law and once again wish I had the ability to do that. My conversations with Lynn could only be described as awkward and uncomfortable.

Elodie moves everyone to the living room and it becomes clear to me that I’m not even needed to be the buffer for Justin. The ease at which he’s getting along with Elodie and Chris is almost giving me a new sense of hope for him meeting the rest of my family one day. Maybe he really can pull this off.

When I enter the living room, Justin is already engaged in conversation with Chris about real estate in LA and is continuing winning Elodie over by playing with Emma while he talks. I don’t even feel the need to have to direct conversation and instead just sit on the couch and listen silently, adding in a few comments here and there. Within twenty minutes everyone seems completely comfortable with each other and I excuse myself and go to the kitchen. I don’t know about everyone else but I’m so hungry my stomach feels like it’s going to eat itself. I’m taking it that Justin’s staying for dinner so I should find something to make for all of us.

“What a catch.”

Elodie’s voice startles me and I jump and pull my head out of the fridge. “Who?”

My sister rolls her eyes and sits down at the table, putting Emma on her lap. “Justin, you moron. Can you grab a bottle?”

I grab one of the baby bottles out of the fridge and stick it in the microwave to warm it up a bit. “I don’t think I’ve ever met someone who makes better first impressions than Justin.”

“He’s great, C. He seems like a genuinely nice person and perfect for you. How long have you guys been dating now?”

“Officially? For just over a month.”

Elodie gives me a weird look. “And unofficially?”

“Like…maybe two months? I don’t know. We were hanging out a lot before he actually came out and asked me to date him.”

“Bet you didn’t hold up your three week rule with him.”

I gave her a triumphant look. “Actually I did.”

“Fool. You can hold off kissing for three weeks for some normal guy. You don’t do that with Justin Timberlake. You take any opportunity you can get.”

I laugh. “He happened to respect my three week rule and if I had tried to break it he probably wouldn’t have even let me.” I grab the heated milk from the microwave and pass it to Elodie. I lean forward, resting my elbows on the counter and watch as she gets settled with Emma. “How long were you dating Chris before you met his parents?”

“Um…maybe a week? But he was still living at home so it was kind of hard not to meet them early on. Why?”

“Justin had me meeting his mom three weeks after we started dating and I just thought it was kind of soon.”

“Are he and his mom close?”

“Extremely.”

“Then it’s not that soon.”

“That’s what Hannah said too.”

“You’re just used to keeping boyfriends away from Mom and Grant that you don’t realize that everyone else’s family aren’t as dysfunctional as ours.”

My nose wrinkles a bit. “Justin keeps saying he wants to meet Mom and Grant.”

Elodie smirks a bit. “Good luck with that. I still remember the first time I introduced Chris to them and I only let him in the house for a grand total of two minutes before dragging him out and saving him.”

“They’ve warmed up to him now though.”

Elodie laughs. “Only reason Mom has is because Chris helped give her a grandchild. And once Grant realized that Chris is a technology wiz and could help fix everything in the house, he became like his second son.”

I ponder that as I grab the steaks I had marinating in the fridge. “I don’t think either of those things will work with Justin.”

“Whatever. Just get the introduction over with and then you can avoid them for a while. Are they coming out for the opening on Saturday?”

“No. Mom has some business conference or something all weekend.”

“Figures. So is everything ready for the opening?”

“Pretty much. Kyle’s been amazing with pulling all the loose ends together. He’s seriously the best person I could have hired for store manager.”

“I want to meet this guy. You keep raving about him.”

“You’ll understand when you meet him tomorrow. You still want to come see the store tomorrow morning, right?”

“Yeah. I wish we could all stay for the opening.”

I wave her guilt off. “Chris has to get back to work and you have to get back to the daycare. I’ll have all the pictures sent to you and it’ll be like you were there.”

Elodie laughs. “With the amount of pictures you take, I can probably make a flip book with them and it actually will be like I’m there.”

I roll my eyes. I can get a little camera happy and take a ton of pictures and Elodie is constantly making fun of me for it. I’ve always figured it’s better to have too many pictures than not enough. And maybe that’s resulted in hundreds of photo albums but you just get another bookshelf and problem solved. “Bitch.”

She gives me a mock chastising face. “Young impressionable ears, Cassandra!” she scolds, making me laugh.

“I’m pretty sure she’s so focused on eating that she’s not hearing a word we’re saying.”

Elodie points her finger at me but smiles as well. “Watch your language around my baby.”

I salute her. “Yes ma’am.”

Elodie’s eyes move away from me and towards the doorway. “You better keep a muzzle on Cassandra when you guys have some babies cause she’s polluting my poor baby’s ears with filthy words.”

Only my dear sister would talk about me having babies with a guy I’ve been seeing for a month. I shoot her a murderous glare as I feel my cheeks go red. The second of silence seems to last hours as I wait to how Justin’s going to respond to her comment. When his laugh fills the room, I feel my shoulders relax.

“I’ll have to keep that in mind.” His hand brushes back some hair that had been hanging in front of my face as I washed the potatoes and I glance up at him, giving what I hope is an apologetic look for Elodie. He simply smiles and winks at me. “Is there enough food for me?”

“I don’t think there’s enough food in the world for you,” I say. I’ve never met a guy who can eat as much as Justin. It’s basically become tradition that when we go out and eat, he finishes his plate and half of mine.

“Smart ass,” he replies.

“You know, I thought this would be a wholesome place for me to feed my daughter but it’s turned into some vulgar poolhouse with all this language and…”

“She gets dramatic,” I say to Justin over Elodie’s continued speech.

“I can see that. I’ll have to watch what I say around her. She looks like she’s gonna wash my mouth out with soap.”

I laugh. “She probably would if she could.” I shut my mouth quickly when I glance at Elodie and see her staring at us silently. “Sorry, what were you saying?”

She ignores me and turns to Justin. “You’ll soon come to find that Cassandra is particularly rude to me because I’m her younger sibling. I’ve come to the conclusion that it’s because she’s bitter about how wise beyond my years I am.”

Justin chuckles at her words and I scoff and grab the plate of steaks. “You keep telling yourself that,” I say to Elodie on my way past her to the patio door. I’m a little worried about leaving her alone with Justin because she has the tendency to say some pretty outrageous stuff. Here’s hoping that she can censor herself.

I’ve only just started the barbeque when the patio door opens and I turn to see Justin stepping outside. He closes the door behind him and walks over to me. I smile when he slides his arm around me and pulls me close to his side.

“I really like them,” he says. His fingers pick up some beat in his head and tap against my hip. “They’re really nice.”

“Yeah they are. And you made another great first impression cause Elodie loves you.”

“See? Me meeting your family isn’t so bad. Now you just have to let me tackle the rest of them.”

Outright refusing that I’ll ever introduce him to the rest of my family is the automatic thing to do but I try and keep Elodie’s words in mind. I do just need to get it over with. “My mom and step dad are coming out in the beginning of May so you can meet them then.”

His eyebrows raise before he can catch it. “Really?”

I force a smile onto my face. “Yep.”

He smiles and leans down to lightly kiss me. “Great.”

I should be happy that he’s so interested in meeting my family. I really should be. But until the meeting is over, I don’t think this feeling of dread is going to leave me.

Rachel jerks her head away from my hand holding the candle. “You don’t have to shove it up my nose,” she replies, taking it from me and smelling it. “It’s nice but a little fruity. It’ll give you a headache after a couple minutes.”

Sighing, I run my eyes over the huge selection of candles in front of me. Seems like there’s every scent known to man and yet every single one I’ve picked up has been wrong. Or wrong according to Rachel. Normally I would have just ignored her opinion but I kind of need it for this.

Grabbing a vanilla candle off the shelf, I toss it to her. “This one?”

“You could. You should just get a couple of these and some unscented ones.”

“Just a couple?”

“If you get a million scented candles it’s going to be overwhelming. Trust me.” She grabs two candles off the shelf and puts them in the basket I’m carrying. She begins to walk down the aisle and I trail behind her. “What next?”

“Thinking of new sheets. The one’s I have are kind of old.”

“That’s on the other side of the store.” Rachel switches directions and as we walk by a massive selection of shower curtains, she gives me a sideways glance. “I would just like to state for the record that I’m a little creeped out that I’m helping you pick out stuff to make your sexual experience with my friend more enjoyable.”

“Do you think you could say that a bit louder?” I ask, rolling my eyes. “I’m not sure everyone in the store heard you.”

“Seriously. Why am I the one you pick to help you get all this shit.”

“Cause you were the first person I saw this morning. And you know Cassie.”

“It still creeps me out. After helping you pick out all this stuff I’m going to like be able to picture it.”

I laugh. “Want me to tape it for you, Rach?”

“Shut the hell up. You’re so disgusting. Do you want my help or not? I will leave.”

Her threat shuts me up because I know she’ll actually walk out if I make fun of her too much. And I desperately need a girl’s opinion on all this stuff I’m getting. I want tonight to be special for Cassie and everything needs to be just right.

“What time are you going for tonight?” Rachel asks as she begins to grab packages of sheets.

“It starts at seven so I’m going to leave at quarter too. Are you going to meet me at my house?”

“Yeah. After we leave here I have a hair appointment and then I’ll have to go home and change then I’ll come over.”

“Just make sure you’re on time. I don’t want to be late to the opening.”

“Don’t get your panties in a knot. I’ll be there.”

Rachel’s bad at punctuality. It drives me crazy. Funny how I can tolerate Cassie’s constant lateness but when Rachel’s late for plans I want to wring her neck.

“I take it I need to find my own way home tonight?” Rachel asks, putting a package of sheets in my basket.

“Ideally.” I pick up the sheets and wrinkle my nose. “Purple? Seriously?”

She laughs and takes them from me to put back on the shelf. “I just wanted to see if you’d go with it.”

“I’m trying to set a romantic mood not give her ammo for making fun of me in the future.”

Rachel doesn’t respond and looks over the sheet selection in front of us. After a minute she tosses a package of copper colored sheets into my basket and I don’t protest, deciding I can live with those.

“So why is this so special?”

I’m not expecting that question and I turn to stare at my cousin. This seems like an awkward question coming from someone who apparently is creeped out with helping me get stuff for tonight. “Uh, it’ll be our first time?” I say, making it a question, my voice carrying an “are you really that dense” tone to it.

Rachel rolls her eyes. “Yeah, I got that. But you’re just putting so much effort into making everything picture perfect.” She grabs some pillowcases in the same color as the sheets and hands them to me. “If you plan things too much you’re asking for something to go wrong.”

I put the pillowcases into the increasingly heavy basket and switch it to my other arm. “Yeah well I’ll take my chances.”

“So you guys have been dating like a month and a half and this is seriously the first time?” Rachel gives me a skeptical look. “Come on.”

When did she become so interested in my sex life? “Do you think I have no control at all?”

“But a month and a half? Seems like a long time to wait. Especially when you guys spend so much time together.”

“She’s been busy.” I say and leave it at that. It’s the truth. The past week I’ve barely gotten two minutes alone with Cassie. She’s been working hardcore, making sure everything is perfect for tonight and has been completely sressed out. Having any alone time is basically out of the question. But I know after tonight goes amazing, she’s going to be relaxed and everything will be perfect.

Rachel starts digging through a sale bin of throw pillows but her questions keep coming. “You really like her, huh?”

I set my basket down on the ground, realizing that Rachel is planning to have a heart to heart in the middle of Bed, Bath & Beyond and I might as well get comfortable. “I wouldn’t be doing all this if I didn’t.”

“Are you in love with her?”

Only Rachel and my mom would come out with such a bold question. Normally I would tell her to mind her own damn business but you know when you’re so excited about something that you’re just waiting for the opportunity to talk about it? Well this is the opportunity and I’m taking it. I keep my voice low so no prying ears can hear. “I think so.”

She looks up from the pillows, seeming a bit surprised. She probably wasn’t expecting a serious answer for her question. Her surprised look slowly turns to a smile. “I thought so. I said that to Trace and he said no way.”

I shrug nonchalantly like it’s no big deal that I’m in love with Cassie. Truth is, it’s huge. It’s huge enough to keep me up at nights wondering if it’s the real deal. I know one of my biggest faults is moving too quickly in relationships and I’ve been trying to slow down and analyze things. There’s nothing worse than falling head over heals for somebody way before they feel the same way about you.

“So you’ve told her?”

Rachel’s question seems pretty stupid to me and it makes me think that maybe she doesn’t know Cassie quite as well as I thought she did. “No.”

“Why not?”

I nudge the basket out of my way with my toe and go over to a display of pillows. I poke my finger into a one a couple times before turning back to Rachel. “What was it that Granny always said about father daughter relationships?”

“Granny says a lot of stuff.”

“About how the father daughter relationships affects other things.”

“Oh. She said that the relationship a father and daughter have affects every single future relationship a girl will have. Or something like that.”

“So issues a girl has with her father will carry into other relationships.”

“Yeah.”

“That’s the problem. Has Cassie ever mentioned her family to you?”

“No. She’s private about that stuff.”

“Her dad walked out on her family when she was four.”

Rachel cringes a bit. “Oh.”

“Yeah. And I’ve noticed that she has this thing about commitment. It took forever to convince her to go on an actual first date with me. It was like going on that date was making our relationship an official thing and she was trying to avoid it.” I grab a pillow and squeeze it in my hands and then let it go and watch it return to its previous shape. “She’s scared of commitment and I think it has to do with her dad walking out on them.”

“Maybe she thinks that every male in her life will do that?”

“Yeah.”

“What about ex boyfriends? Have you asked her about that?”

“No. I really should have asked her about that by now but I get the feeling that that’s another thing she won’t want to talk about.”

“Maybe her ex’s have all been jerks and only reinforced her thinking that she can’t depend on a guy.”

“Maybe.” I toss the pillow back on top of the stack and shove my hands in the pockets of my jeans. “But she obviously has this aversion to real commitment and if I tell her I love her, she might freak out.”

“Or she might feel the same way and say it right back.”

That would be pretty amazing but I can’t help but think it wouldn’t happen that way. “I think I’m just going to give it some time before saying anything. I don’t want to scare her off.”

“I’m pretty sure that if she was going to be scared off, she would have been the first time she smelt your raunchy morning breath.”

And just like that, all the seriousness from our conversation was gone and Rachel was back to being annoying. It’s easiest to not respond to her comments so I just throw a pillow in her direction. A laugh escapes me when her protest is muffled by the pillow hitting her square in the face but quickly have to duck when the pillow is heading back in my direction.

Rachel gestures for me to pick up the basket and then begins to walk towards the checkout. “This is why I don’t take you out in public very often. Idiot.”

* * *

Considering this is the grand opening of the store I’ve always dreamed of having, I really should be paying more attention to everything that’s happening around me and not anxiously watching the door, waiting for Justin to arrive. I’ve schmoozed as much as I can handle for one night and I really just want to see his familiar face to calm my nerves.

He’s late, which isn’t like him at all and that’s probably what is making me the most restless. I’m the one who’s usually late. He’s always on time or even early for everything and the fact that he’s not here when it’s almost eight when the invitation was for seven is strange. He better still be coming. He would call if he wasn’t, right? Maybe I should check my cell phone. He might have already tried to call.

“Cassandra!”

Susan’s voice halts me before I can go find my phone. I turn towards her.

“There’s some people you should meet,” she says, grabbing my arm.

“Who?”

“Head agents for Elite Models. Kyle’s already over there talking to them.”

I allow myself to be pulled across the store to where Kyle stood with two women. It doesn’t take me long to lose interest in the conversation after introductions are done. I’m really not into the business aspect of everything. That’s what I have Kyle and Susan for. All I want to do is make clothes. So as they start talking about contracts, my eyes wander back to the door.

My feelings for Justin have grown so intense over the past few weeks that it’s actually scaring me. I like to take my time with relationships and the rate that Justin wants to move ours is faster than I’m used to. Granted, I really haven’t dated that many guys so I’m not the most experienced person ever but I’m still pretty sure Justin is the kind of guy to get intense fast.

But even if I think he’s moving faster than I’d like, it doesn’t hold back all these intense feelings whenever I think about him or even see him. In the beginning of our relationship, I felt like I didn’t get to know the actual person he was. Sometimes his answers to my questions would seem rehearsed like he had practiced them in front of a mirror at home. He’s like me in that sense and guarded with the information he puts out there.

But lately I feel like I’ve really gotten to know the real him. I now feel that I know him in that way that most people don’t. I know that he treats his dogs better than himself. I know when he watches TV, he usually ends up stretched out on the floor and sleeping within half an hour. I know that he claims to hate pineapple and yet will drink gallons of pineapple juice after he goes for a run.

It’s all these little things that you get to know about a person that makes you feel like you actually know who they are as a human being and not just what the rest of the world sees. It makes me feel special to know I have this knowledge about him that as petty as it can be, it’s stuff that only a few select people know.

And maybe it scares me to be getting this close to him in such a short period of time. I’ll be the first to admit that I’m not the most successful person with relationships and with all the failed attempts it would seem to most people to just give up and become a lesbian. But Justin makes me want to forget all about any failure and start fresh.

My name is said in conversation and I struggle to figure out what exactly we were talking about. No help is coming from Susan so I throw a glance over at Kyle who quickly jumps in.

“We’d love to have some of your models in the next fashion show, right, Cassandra?”

I quickly nod my head, loving Kyle at that moment for keeping me from looking like an airhead. “Of course.”

They go back into discussion and I’m determined to not let my mind drift this time but that soon fails when I see the door open out of the corner of my eye. I turn my head and a smile breaks out across my face when I see Justin, Trace, and Rachel walk in. I quickly excuse myself from the conversation and make my way through the people towards them.

“You’re here,” I say when I reach them. “I thought maybe you weren’t coming.”

“Of course we’re here,” Justin says. “Rachel had a hair emergency that could have been avoided if she had planned her time better but-”

“Shut up, Justin. You’ve said that a million times on the way over here. My curling iron malfunctioned in the middle of doing my hair and I had to get a new one.”

“Don’t worry about it,” I say, not wanting Justin and Rachel to bicker over being an hour late. Those two love each other but fight like they’re brother and sister. “I’m just glad you’re here now.”

“The store looks amazing,” Rachel says, looking around. “It’s going to do so well.”

I hug my arms around myself and glance around. “I hope so.”

A hand on my arm pulls my attention away from the people milling around the store and my eyes turn to meet Justin’s.

“Do you need to be out here or can I steal you away for a few minutes?” he asks.

My lips turn up. “I’m sure everyone can manage for a couple minutes.”

He smiles and I let him pull me through the store towards my office. It’s dark and empty and he turns on the light on his way in as I shut the door behind us. The door is barely closed when I feel his body pressed against mine and his hands sliding around my stomach.

“You look gorgeous tonight,” he says, pressing a kiss against my shoulder.

I tilt my head to the side to give him more access and his lips move to my neck. “Thank you.” A shiver goes through me as he kisses my skin and I bring up my hands to weave my fingers with his. I pull his hands off my stomach so I can turn around in his arms and face him.

“I’m so glad you’re here,” I mumble as I press my lips against his. “I’ve been bored.”

He chuckles against my mouth and pulls back just enough to get some words out. “So I’m just good for entertainment purposes?”

I smile and loop my arms around his neck. “Mostly.”

His hands tickle up my sides and I laugh, trying to squirm away from him but he only pulls me tighter against his body.

“You’re still coming over tonight, right?” he whispers in my ear.

A shiver goes through me. “Of course.” Have I mentioned how excited I am for tonight? It’s been a long two months.

“How long do you think this will go tonight?”

The trail of kisses he’s making along my jaw is making it hard to think straight. “Mmm…maybe eleven? Are you going to tire out by then?”

“Nope. You?”

“No way.” He pulls his mouth away from my jaw and looks down at me. “And do you have to be back here tomorrow morning?”

“Kyle’s going to open in the morning but I need to be here for part of the day. But not until the afternoon.”

“So I can make you breakfast in bed?”

I smile up at him. “Sweet. I’d skip work for breakfast in bed.”

“I’ll have to keep that in mind.” He brings his head down and kisses me again, this time deeper and longer. I could easily get myself lost in this but I know that I’ve probably been away from everyone for too long and I should get back.

“I need to go schmooze some more,” I say, pulling away a little breathless.

“Okay.” He reluctantly drops his arms from around me and I grab his hand, pulling him towards the door.

“Are you going to be able to occupy yourself for a few hours?” I ask as we leave the office.

“I’m sure I’ll manage. I’ve got Trace and Rach to keep me company. Just come visit me every once in a while.”

I give his hand a squeeze before letting it go so I can join Susan. Now that Justin’s here, I’m a little distracted but I’m going to try to push it aside because I only get one grand opening to my brand new store and I want this forever engraved in my memory.

From the glance in my rearview mirror, I look as cool and collected as can be but inside my stomach is churning. Meeting the family is a piece of cake. Meeting the best friend is an entirely different matter. The best friend can be the deal breaker. The best friend has the most influence and them liking you is imperative. I MUST make a good impression with the best friend.

I took extra care with my experience today, making sure to shave and dress in a casual, but respectable, outfit. I don’t want this girl to think I’m a slob. Cassie laughed at me when I asked her if she thought I should get a haircut before I met Hannah. She doesn’t get this anxiety because I kind of just forced Trace and Rachel on her when she wasn’t prepared. But I’ve been hearing about Hannah ever since I met Cassie and how close they are, blah, blah, blah. I get the feeling that Cassie values this girl’s opinion over any one else’s so I cannot screw this up.

Within seconds of ringing the bell, Cassie’s opening the front door. She’s just wearing a pair of jeans and a zip up hoodie but she looks amazing. Lately I can’t get enough of her. The night of her opening…well let’s just say that was spectacular and ever since then I’ve wanted to spend every minute with her. She spent the entire day at work yesterday though so I didn’t really get the chance. Now I’m kind of wishing Hannah wasn’t here so we could just be alone together.

“Hey,” she says, stepping close to hug me. I squeeze her back tightly and breathe in. After weeks of wondering, I snooped through her bathroom to figure out what it was that she always smelt like. When I found a massive stash of everything cherry blossom from Bath and Body Works, I had my answer. I had already sent Rachel to go get some of it from the store to keep at my place so she has her stuff when she stays over. And not that I’d ever tell anyone this, but sometimes I’ll just go smell it because it reminds me of her.

“I’m on time,” I say into her hair.

She laughs and hits me lightly on the back. “Stop feeling bad about being late to the opening. I’m late for most of my life and you don’t hear me apologizing for it.”

That’s true. I pull back so I can kiss her. She has some sort of fruity lip stuff on and I lick the remnants of it off my lips when I pull back. “So?”

She smiles brightly and pulls back, grabbing my hand in the process. “Hannah’s in the kitchen.”

I follow her through her house and find myself taking a deep breath before stepping through the doorway. Sitting at one of the barstools by the island counter is a redheaded girl. She’s sitting perfectly straight and has these glasses on and if it wasn’t for the freckles across her nose and the fact that she’s wearing pajama pants, I would have found her completely intimidating.

“Hi,” she says before Cassie can even introduce us. “Hannah.”

She jumps up from the stool and I’m surprised at how short she is. She’s pushing five feet if that. I shake her outstretched hand. “It’s nice to meet you. Cassie’s always talking about you.”

Hannah’s eyes narrow a bit and they cut to Cassie for a second before a smirk settles on her mouth. “She always talks about me because she has a big crush on me.”

I laugh a bit and move to the fridge to grab myself something to drink. “So do you guys have big plans for today?”

“We were going to sit outside and tan,” Cassie says and my eyebrows raise at her. For anyone else, I wouldn’t think twice about sitting outside and tanning. But both look as though they could get a burn on a rainy day. Besides, Cassie has this peaches and cream skin that I’m completely in love with and I don’t want anything to change it.

“Do they make SPF 100?” I ask, taking a sip of water.

Cassie hits me in the stomach, making me choke a bit on my drink. “We’re not THAT pale.”

I manage to swallow and then laugh. “Hey, I’m looking out for your well being. Just don’t complain to me tonight when you’re burnt to a crisp.”

“This is what I tell her over and over,” Hannah says, drawing my attention to her. “She makes me sit outside with her all the time and we always burn.”

“The burn turns into a tan,” Cassie says, folding her arms over her chest.

“The burn turns into skin cancer,” I respond, receiving a roll of the eyes from Cassie.

She huffs and holds out her arm to me. “If you could completely see your veins through your skin, you’d want to tan too.”

If we were alone, I would show her just how much I love her skin but for now, I’m limited to just run my fingers over the smooth skin of the inside of her arm. “Your skin is beautiful just the way it is.”

She tries to hide it but I can see her smile coming through. “We’re still going to tan. Do you want to sit outside with us?”

“Sure. And I’d like to take you ladies to dinner tonight too.”

Both Cassie and Hannah’s face brighten and Hannah gives Cassie a small nod. A bit of relief goes through me. That looked like the nod of approval.

“Sounds good,” Cassie says. “I’m going to go grab some sunscreen. I’ll be back.”

She exits the kitchen, Hannah and me alone. Before I can even come up with something to say, Hannah speaks up, her head tilted to one side quizzically.

“Can I ask you something?”

“Sure.”

“Why do you call her Cassie?”

My eyebrows draw together at her awkward question and I stare at her for a second, trying to figure out if she’s joking. “Because that’s her name?” It comes out as a question and I hope I don’t sound like a complete moron.

“Her name’s Cassandra. The only person she let’s call her anything else is Elodie. Ever since I’ve known her she’s never let anyone call her Cassie.”

Well that’s brand new information. She’s never said she doesn’t like being called Cassie. Shit, I think I called her that the very first time I met her. Why has she never said anything?

Before I can respond, Cassie is breezing back into the room and tossing a bottle of sunscreen on the counter.

“Are you sitting out there in your pajamas?” she asks Hannah.

“No. I’m going to go change quickly.”

I wait until we’re alone before turning to Cassie. “You don’t like being called Cassie?”

She looks surprised. “What?”

“Hannah says that you never let anyone call you Cassie. Why didn’t you tell me? I feel like an idiot for calling you a name you hate.”

She laughs at my obvious anxiety and wraps her arms around me. “I never used to like people calling me that but ever since you did it’s grown on me.”

My lips twitch into a smile. “Really?”

She moves up onto her toes and presses a light kiss onto the corner of mouth. “Mm hmm. Don’t worry about it, okay?”

“Okay,” I agree and move my mouth a bit to the left so I can capture her lips with my own. I kiss her only for a short moment before pulling back. I don’t want to be standing here making out with her and have Hannah walk in on us and get uncomfortable. I keep my one arm around her waist and reach out to grab the sunscreen.

“Only 30?” I ask, examining it.

“I want to get some color,” she replies.

I pick up her hand and kiss the back of it. “I love your skin the color it is. It’s really hot out today. I don’t want you to burn.”

“Then you’ll just have to let me know if I start getting pink,” she replies and then pulls away from me. I watch her with a smile as she grabs a couple bottles of water from the fridge and sets them on the counter. Without looking at me, she says, “Stop looking at me like that.”

My eyebrows rise. “Like what?”

She turns to look at me and smirks. “Like you’re undressing me with your eyes.”

I can’t help but let out a laugh at her words. So maybe I was doing that just a little. But it’s hard not to in her form fitting clothing. “Hard not to when you’re so damn hot.”

She giggles and tosses the first and then the second water bottle to me. “Save it for later. You are going to sleep over tonight, right?”

My smile widens. “I’m all for that plan.”

* * *

I always thought I was in pretty good shape. Not that I’d ever be able to run a marathon but I can run up a few flights of stairs and not be winded. And to me, that’s a good indication of fitness. That standard is quickly going down the toilet as I struggle to keep up with Justin. I should have never told him I wanted to work out because as soon as the words exited my mouth, he was making me change and dragging me outside to jog through the hills surrounding his house. At this point, I have an intense admiration for anyone goes running outside. The treadmill is a piece of cake compared to this. The sweltering heat is just an added bonus I guess.

“How you doing back there?” Justin calls over his shoulder and I silently curse him for not even being out of breath. At this point I feel like an out of shape blob next to him.

My legs feel like jello but I force them to keep moving so I don’t fall even further behind. “Fine. Can we stop soon?”

“There’s a spot up here we can stop. Race you!”

He’s seriously like a child and I’m not going to encourage this so I let him sprint ahead of me. Once he turns the corner and is out of sight, I slow down to a walk, wiping the sweat from my forehead. I am so not attractive right now. This is not how I wanted to be spending my first day away from the store in a week. I was thinking Justin and I would spend some quality time together, maybe go for a swim and get some take out. This was not what I pictured when I came over to his house today.

I round the corner and spot him leaning against a tree. He shakes his head when he sees me.

“It’s like you weren’t even trying to catch up, Cass,” he says, making a show of checking his watch. “I’ve been chilling here for hours.”

“This is brutal,” I complain as I lean over and try to catch my breath. “How are you not out of breath?”

“I do this four times a week,” he says, stretching out his shoulders. “Once you get used to it, it feels great.”

“I have a hard time believing that this could ever feel great,” I say, lowering myself down to the ground with small groan. “You’re going to have to carry me back.”

“After a couple minutes, you’ll feel fine.” He sits down next to me and I frown at how unaffected he is from the past twenty minutes of jogging. I will never be at that point.

I’m in the process of pulling my hair into a tighter ponytail when Justin pushes up his sunglasses to the top of his head and turns to look at me.

“So I have to ask you something I’ve been wondering.”

It better not be why I’m so out of shape. “What?”

“What’s the story with your ex boyfriends?”

I blanch a bit and my hands still, the elastic only half twisted around my hair. “Excuse me?”

If he sees my immediate tenseness, he doesn’t respond to it. “My past relationships are all over magazines but I know nothing about your ex boyfriends and I should, right?”

“You seriously want to talk about this now? Here?”

He shrugs like he sees no issue with it. “Sure. Is that a problem?”

“I…I guess not.” I finish tying up my hair and drop my arms into my lap. “What exactly do you need to know?”

“How many exs do you have?”

“Four.”

He digests this information with a nod and then fires out another one.

“Were the break ups messy?”

This is beginning to feel like an interview. “No.”

“How long was your longest relationship.”

So I thought this torturous run was going to be the low point of my day. But this interrogation is beating that. Call me stupid, but I really thought maybe we’d never have to discuss my past relationships. “Why do you need to know all this?” I find myself blurting out.

He gives me a look like I’m crazy. “Because it’s important. Is this like really touchy for you?”

“No it’s just…” I trail off and shake my head. “Nothing.”

“So how long.”

Okay, apparently we aren’t giving up on that question. I can feel my face heat up and it’s not from the running. “Five months.”

He coughs and then clears his throat. “Pardon?”

He thinks he heard me wrong but he really didn’t. I feel like Phoebe from Friends when Mike found out that she had never been in a long term relationship before. The look of disbelief on Justin’s face at my lack of long term relationship is stressing me out and I’m about to make up my own Vikram when he finally says something.

“Okay, I guess that makes sense.”

A bit of relief goes through me at his acceptance but it’s quickly replaced with some annoyance. “I’m sorry, why exactly does that make sense?”

He doesn’t pick up on my irritation or he wouldn’t have uttered his next words. “Because you have a phobia of commitment.”

My eyebrows shoot up at his bold words. Did he seriously just say that? “Excuse me?” Okay so I probably said that with more attitude than I needed to but seriously, why would he just throw that out there?

He smiles as if to soften his words but it’s already wounded me. “Don’t take it so personally.”

“How exactly do I NOT take that personally?” I ask and pull myself up, despite my protesting muscles. I begin to walk away from him but within seconds he’s by my side and grabbing my arm to halt me.

“Hey, don’t get so upset. I’m just saying what I’ve observed.”

I try and shake off his hand but his fingers remain curled around my forearm. Not looking at him, I stare out at the dirt path. “I do not have a phobia of commitment,” I mumble.

He chuckles but I’m failing to see what’s funny about this. “It took you an entire month to let me take you out on an official first date.”

I’m still refusing to look at him and I know it’s getting to him. “And that automatically means I have commitment phobia?”

“No. But it’s part of it. Don’t get mad, Cassie. I’m not ragging on you about it.”

I cut my eyes to him and then back to the path. I press my lips together and don’t say anything.

“Don’t be mad,” he says again, his hand sliding down from my arm to my hand. He curls his fingers around mine. “I’ve already decided I’m going to be the one to take anyway any of your qualms about commitment.”

I force myself to take a couple deep breaths and chill out. The heat and the fact that I’m tired are making me more irritated than I should be. I make a conscience effort to push away my bad mood.

“Let’s just not talk about it, okay?” I say, finally meeting his eyes.

He opens his mouth, shuts it again, and then nods. “Okay. I really didn’t mean to make you mad.”

I take another deep breath. “I’m not.”

“Are you ready to go again?”

I shake my head. “I’m not running anymore. I can’t make myself do it.”

“We can walk.” His hand still grasping mine, he pulls me back towards the path. “And when we get back to my house we can take a nice long shower.”

He pauses and I glance over at him.

“Together.”

I can’t help but smile and shake my head. The fact that I knew that was going to be his next word is scary. I’m getting to know him way too well.

“You need to stop freaking out.”

My head jerks away from the window and I look at Justin as he puts his hand on my knee, halting its bouncing movement.

“It’s not going to be that bad.”

“You aren’t allowed to say that because you don’t know them.”

“It’s your mom and stepdad, Cass. How bad can it possibly be? They came all the way out here to see you.”

“They came out here because Grant has a business conference here and my mom hates to be alone in the house.”

“You said your mom’s been wanting to see you so I’m sure she came out for that. This really won’t be as bad as whatever you’ve cooked up in your head.”

If his hand weren’t still firmly on my knee, I probably would have started bouncing it again. Instead I resorted to running my fingers through my hair. I’ve been dreading this night ever since Justin and I started dating. Having your boyfriend meet your parents can always be a bit stressful but that stress is multiplied by a million when it’s Justin meeting my parents.

I’m too worried about Grant because he’s most likely going to be his usual disinterested self. As soon as he figures out that Justin has no real knowledge in banking, he’ll lose interest in him and not bother with conversation. It’s my mom I’m stressing out about. She has very specific ideas in the type of guy I should be dating and I know Justin is none of those things. I’m hoping she’ll at least be civil to him but that could be a stretch.

I’ve been trying to gently let Justin in on this fact ever since we arranged this dinner with my mom and Grant but he doesn’t get it. He’s very much under the impression that he’ll be able to win them both over by the end of the night and I know it’s not going to happen.

“We’re here.”

I jump a bit at his words and focus my eyes out the window to see that we’re approaching the restaurant we’re having dinner at. The drive here did not take long enough.

“Can you just…circle the block once?” I ask.

“Sure.” He goes past the entrance and picks up my hand in his as we continue driving. He doesn’t say anything even though I know he’s dying to tell me for the hundredth time that it will be okay and to stop freaking out. All he does is give me a questioning look when we near the entrance again and after taking a deep breath, I nod and we turn in. He pulls up to the entrance and looks over at me.

“Ready?”

No. “I guess.”

He gives me what would have been a reassuring smile if I weren’t so tense and then he lets go of my hand so we can both get out. He gives the keys to the valet and then waits for me to join his side. Weaving his fingers through mine, he gives me a gentle pull and we walk towards the restaurant.

“So is there anything that I should avoid talking about?” he asks as we walk through the door.

I run my fingers through my hair and shake my head. “Politics and Religion. Grant will eat you alive if disagree with him on either of those things.”

“Politics and religion. Got it.”

We reach the hostess, who is busy staring dreamily at Justin and I clear my throat to pull her eyes to me.

“We’re joining the party of Grant and Isabelle Reyna.”

“Follow me. They’re in the back.”

I was hoping they wouldn’t be here yet but I guess I’m out of luck. We’re led through the restaurant and I sigh a bit. Figures Grant would chose the most obscenely over the top restaurant. He loves to let the world know he’s rich and having dinner at a place where a meal costs the average person’s mortgage is just one of his ways of doing that.

My mom and Grant come into view and I start to lag behind until Justin’s hand gives me a yank and pulls me back to his side.

“It’s going to be fine,” he manages to get out in a whisper just before Mom catches sight of us. She pushes back her chair and gets up.

“Did you get the time mixed up for the reservation?” she says. “It’s already ten minutes past seven.”

This is the greeting I get after not seeing her for seven months. I force a smile onto my face. “No I was just running a bit behind.”

She leans towards me to give me a hug. “Cassandra, dear, what is going on with your hair?”

My hands immediately fly to my hair which was previously in loose curls but after running my fingers through it a million times, is now probably a frizzy mess. I smooth it down and decide not to respond to her. Suddenly realizing Justin is just standing beside me, I make introductions.

“Mom, Grant, this is Justin. Justin, this is my mom, Isabelle and my step father, Grant.”

Justin has his most winning smile on his face as he stretches out his hand to shake theirs. “It’s so nice to meet both of you,” he says.

My mom barely returns his handshake and then gestures to the chairs across from her and Grant. “Well sit. We don’t need to spend the entire night standing here.”

Not seemingly affected by my mom’s rudeness, Justin pulls out my chair and waits for me to sit before sitting beside me. A waiter comes by and fills Justin and my glasses with wine and I immediately take a large gulp of it, receiving a disapproving look from my mother. She takes her own dainty sip of her own wine and clears her throat.

“So how is the store going?” she asks me.

“Really good. The past couple weeks that it’s been open have been running really smooth.”

“I’d like to go see it tomorrow while Grant’s in meetings.”

That’ll be fun. She’s going to point out every single flaw with the interior decoration of the store. “I was planning on going in the later morning if you want to come then.”

“Sure. I’d also like to see this little house that you’ve bought.”

I’m sure there will be more shots about my lack of knowledge of interior design during that. “Okay.”

Her gaze abruptly leaves me and moves to Justin. “So you’re the singer.”

He sits up a bit straighter and nods. “I am.”

“And how exactly did you meet Cassandra?”

“We met in New York during Fashion Week. We both had shows on during it.”

“I’m sorry, I thought you said you were a musician.”

“I am. But I also have a clothing line with my best friend, Trace. It’s called William Rast and-”

“So you sing and have a clothing line? How exactly do you find time for a personal life?”

Justin seems to be taken back a bit at her rude interruption but he covers it pretty well. “Trace handles most of the business for the clothing line and I’ve learned to manage my time pretty well.”

Grant decides at this moment to speak up. “Doesn’t sound like a career like that has long jevity.”

Justin turns to him. “In what way?”

“People’s taste’s and interest’s change and if you can’t adapt to it you’re shit out of luck.”

Ouch. Grant doesn’t speak up much but when he does it’s brutal. My eyes slide to Justin and try to read his face but I find it impossible to gauge his expression.

“I’ve always thought I’m pretty good at adapting to the changing world,” he says evenly. “And being in the business for so long has opened doors for career paths in the future.”

“Such as?”

“Producing for starters. I’m just finishing producing an album for an up and coming artist.”

Grant waves him off and I feel my defenses rise. I can take my mom and Grant but Justin doesn’t deserve this. Especially when he’s so unprepared for it.

“Don’t you think it would be a smarter move to learn some skills that would give you some guarantees for the future? The arts don’t provide a solid future.”

So now he’s not only insulting Justin at this point but me as well. “Don’t you think it’s better to do something you love doing than to hate your job?” I ask, crossing my arms over my chest.

“Cassandra, sweetie, sit up straight,” my mother interjects and I roll my eyes and pull myself into a straighter position. It’s easier than arguing with her.

Grant leans back in his chair and picks up his wine glass. “There’s something to be said for financial security. I wouldn’t expect you to take my advice, Cassandra.”

If I took his advice, I would be sitting in a stuffy office in some huge building working twelve hours a day. In other words, I would be hating life. I’m about to say that when I feel Justin’s hand clasp onto mine under the table. He gives it a squeeze and rest our joined hands on his leg. That simple action lowers my anger a bit and I take a deep breath. “Can we please talk about something else?” I ask. “How’s the interior decorating going, Mom?”

I know that’s a safe topic and we’re good for at least the first course. As Mom starts chattering on about some decorating job, Justin lets go of my hand and brought his hand up to rub at my lower back. I felt some tension leave my body at his touch. Hopefully we’d have a bit of a break before my mom started ripping into Justin’s past. I know that she keeps up with gossip magazines and I can’t even begin to think about what she’s going to ask him.

I don’t feel any bit of real relaxation until we’re back in Justin’s car two hours later. The last thing I want to do is talk after that torture and he doesn’t push for conversation as we drive back to my house. He’s probably too busy trying to figure out how he managed to get involved with a girl whose mother just spent a good forty minutes picking apart his previous relationships. She actually asked him why he thought moving in with his first serious girlfriend when he was so young would be a good idea. I don’t know where her audacity even comes from.

The dinner with my mom and Grant has taken everything out of me and when we arrive at my house, I immediately go for my room. Justin seems to be on the same page and follows me up. Neither of us say anything as we separately get ready for bed. It’s not until he gets into bed beside me that anything is said.

“I think I get what you were saying about your family.”

I shake my head slightly as I stare up at the ceiling. “I’m so sorry.”

“Don’t apologize for them. That’s not your responsibility.” He sighs in the dark. “It was only the first time we met. You could invite them over here for dinner and we could try it again. Now I know what I should expect.”

I squeeze my eyes shut. “I cannot handle them. They were so horrible to you and they don’t even know you.”

“Hey.”

His hand on my cheek prompts me to open my eyes and I turn my head to face him.

“I’ve had people say worse things to me. I’ll be fine.”

I turn onto my side and curl into him. Justin has the gift of acceptance and I guess I shouldn’t be surprised that he isn’t running for the hills after this disastrous dinner. It really is an impressive trait.

His arms go around me as I press against him and he leans down to kiss me softly. It’s exactly what I need after the past few hours. I melt into his embrace and let his kisses lull me into calm.

“You can’t choose the family you’re born into,” he says when he pulls back. “It’s not your fault they are how they are.”

I offer him a small smile and shut my eyes as he reaches up to brush his thumb across my cheek. “I know.”

“And any consolation to you, you turned out amazing if that’s what you were working with growing up.”

Slipping my arms around his bare back, I lean my head down on his chest, giving his shoulder a kiss. “Thank you.”

We both fall silent and his lips press into the top of my head. Within a few minutes, his breathing is slow and steady in my ear. I envy how easily he can fall asleep. After a night like this, I know I’m going to end up laying awake for at least another hour, rehashing every single word that was said in my head. Hopefully it won’t last for too long and I’ll be able to fall asleep. Sometimes the ignorance of sleep is the perfect end to a rotten day.

My judgment is absolutely horrible when I’m half asleep. When I’m still half dreaming I don’t know which way is up. I smell Cassie and there’s all this warmth around me and I moan a bit as I cuddle closer to her.

“Mm, did you leave the blinds open, Babe? The sun’s killing me,” I mumble. I get no response so I try again. “What time is it?”

She’s got to be awake but she’s still not answering anything I say. I try a new approach and move my leg to rub against hers. When I find the lower half of her body missing, my eyes snap open and I realize I’ve been spooning with a decorative pillow that was laying on the bed. Feeling like an idiot, I toss it off the side of the bed. A frown settles on my face as I prop myself up on one elbow and look around the room to find myself alone.

Cassie always gets out of bed before I’m awake. I don’t think I’ve ever woken up and found her laying beside me. Not to say that she shouldn’t move until I’m awake but it would be nice once in a while to share that just waking up feeling with her. I like girls when they first wake up and they’re all warm and natural laying beside you. I’m convinced there’s no better way to start off a day than that.

Sleeping is no longer an option at this point so I kick away the covers around me and get out of bed. I don’t bother with a shower but instead simply splash some water on my face and brush my teeth. I grab a change of clothes I had here and quickly put them on and then went in search of Cassie. Halfway down the stairs, I could hear her voice along with another. Rounding the corner of the kitchen I find her and Isabelle Reyna sitting at the table.

“Justin.” Cassie sounds relieved. “Do you want some coffee?”

“Sure. Good morning, Isabelle.”

Isabelle’s eyes move to me and some unease goes through me as she gives me a once over. I’m getting the distinct impression that I’ve done something very wrong.

“Hello.”

There is a major air of cold coming from this woman. She seemed less than impressed with me from dinner last night but this seems to be taking it to a whole new level. She’s looking at me like I’m a bug she wishes she could just step on.

“Mom, do you want more coffee?”

“I still have half a cup, Cassandra,” Isabelle says and then directs her attention back to me. “You don’t need to be at work this morning, Justin?”

I take a seat across the table from her. “I’m planning on going in later this afternoon. Bridget, the girl I’m producing for, has some press this morning so we can’t do anything until after she’s done that.” I stop talking when I see the disinterested look on Isabelle’s face. Wow. I hate to say it, but this woman’s a bit of a bitch.

“Here, Justin.”

I smile gratefully up at Cassie and take the cup of coffee she offers me. “Thank you.” It’s a relief when she sits down in the chair beside me and I’m not left facing this woman alone.

“Did you sleep okay?” she asks, pulling her feet onto the edge of her chair and wrapping her arms around her knees.

“Yeah, I did.” I consider telling how I had thought that pillow was her this morning but quickly decided against it. Something tells me Isabelle wouldn’t be amused. “You?”

She nods and takes a sip of her coffee. It’s quiet for a minute before she speaks again. “Mom and I were going to go to the store in a little bit. Did you want to come?”

Normally I would jump at the chance to spend any time with Cassie but I don’t think I can handle much more of these looks from Isabelle. I have got to find a way to figure out a way to get this lady to like me. “I need to go home and let my dogs out. They’ve been there alone all night.”

Isabelle clears her throat and I glance over at her but she’s looking out the window. Stifling a sigh, I take one last drink of coffee and push back my chair. “I should go.”

Cassie looks up at me as I stand. “Are you going to be recording late?”

“Probably pretty late. I’ll call you.” I lean down and kiss her quickly and then straighten. “Isabelle, I’d love to take you and Grant out for dinner or lunch before you go back to San Francisco.”

Isabelle gives a short nod. “Well I’ll have to check with Grant to see if he has some free time in between meetings.”

“Of course. Well whenever you have time.” I take my cup to counter and place it in the sink. “I’ll call you later, Cassie.”

I’m only halfway to the front door when I hear light footsteps behind me. I turn and stop so Cassie can reach me. She smiles at me and pulls me towards the front door. Once we’re outside and standing on the top step she puts her arms around my neck and goes on her toes.

“She’s being a bitch cause you slept over,” she says into my ear. A giggle escapes her. “I don’t think she approves.”

I can’t help but roll my eyes a bit. “You’re a grown woman.”

Her lips connect with the corner of my jaw. “I know. She’ll get over it.” She leans back and pats my cheek. “Go home and shave. The stubble’s sexy but you’re scratching me.”

I smile at her and lean down to kiss her once and then pull away. “Call me if you need a break from the family.”

“I will.” I grab her arm before she can go back into the house and pull her back to me. “And next time we have a sleep over, you really need to chill in bed in the morning. This morning I missed you so bad I had to cuddle with one of your pillows.”

Laughing, she rubs her hand over my back. “Next time we have a sleep over I will definitely try.”

Smiling, I kiss her once more and then give her butt a light tap. “Go before I take you with me.”

She laughs again and opens the door. “I’ll call you,” she says and I nod. She throws one last look over her shoulder and then disappears into the house. I wait until the door is closed before making my way to my car. Once I’m inside, I pull my cell phone from my pocket and dial Rachel’s number. Her voicemail picks up after four rings.

“Hey, it’s me. I’m going to be at the studio until late. Cassie’s mom’s in town and she’s a real piece of work. Cassie might need some rescuing later on in the day so give her a call this afternoon. Talk to you later.”

* * *

“And to top it all off she decided that she absolutely loves Kyle and spent half an hour telling my why I should be with a guy like him rather than Justin.”

Rachel looks away from the road to glance at me. “Don’t tell Justin that.”

I undo my seatbelt as she parks the car in front of the recording studio. “Why?”

She stares at me for a moment before shaking her head. “Just don’t. He’ll get weird about it.”

I shrug and open the car door. “Okay. Are you coming in?”

“I have to go home. You’re sure you don’t want to go back to the store and get your car?”

“Justin can take me over there later.” I get out of the car. “Thanks for hanging out with me. I really needed it after today.”

She smiles at me. “Anytime.”

“Bye,” I say and then shut the car door and step onto the sidewalk. I wait until she’s pulled away before going into the building. I’m proud to say I’ve gotten better at maneuvering my way around recording studios and it doesn’t take me long to find Studio 4 where Justin is recording.

The atmosphere is different that what I’m used to when I push open the door. Justin is sitting at the sound board and looking tired while Bridget is curled up in the corner of the couch, a miserable expression on her face. When the door creaks slightly, they both look towards me.

“Hey,” Justin says slowly. He pushes his chair back and stands up. “I thought you were going to come later.”

“I was with Rachel and she had to go home so I thought I’d come now. I glance back and forth between him and Bridget. “Is everything okay?”

He glances at the younger girl and sighs. His voice low, he simply says, “Homesick.” He runs his hands over the top of his head. “Did your mom like the store?”

I shrug. “As much as I thought she would. She offered to redecorate it though. For a discounted price of course.”

His lips turn up a bit. “Gonna take her up on that?”

I scoff. “Yeah right.”

“Have you eaten?”

“Not since lunch.”

“I’m starving. I’m going to go get some McDonalds. Want to come?”

My eyes go back to Bridget. “Can you get me something and bring it back here?”

His eyes follow my gaze and he nods. “Sure. Bridge, you want anything?”

She shakes her head and he shrugs. He leans down and kisses me briefly. “I’ll be back.”

“Bye.” I watch him leave and once the door is shut behind him, I turn to Bridget. “So,” I say, walking over to the couch. “You’re missing home, huh?”

She doesn’t look at me but I can see her chin tremble slightly.

“I’m right there with you,” I say, sitting down beside her. “I miss my home too.”

Her eyes turn to me. “Your home?”

“Seattle. I moved out here a few months ago because of my store.”

Her eyes return to her knees. “Oh.”

“I know it’s hard to be away from your family but at least you’re out here doing what you want to do with your life. Soon you’ll be rolling in so much dough you can fly your family wherever you are.”

That makes her smile a bit and she shifts on the couch so she’s facing me more. “I don’t know anyone in LA except my uncle,” she says softly. “I miss my friends.”

My heart goes out to this girl. I can’t imagine moving across the country at the age of sixteen. “Can you call them?”

She shrugs. “They’re always busy with school.” She sighs. “I just want to tell them about everything.”

“School will be over soon,” I offer, inwardly cringing at how lame the words sound. I’ve never been the best at cheering people up when they’re down. I never know what to say.

She nods and it’s quiet for a minute before she moves so she’s actually facing me. “I have a date on Saturday.”

I smile at the excitement I can hear bubbling in her. “Ooh, with who?”

“My uncle’s neighbor. He’s seventeen.”

“Better watch out for those older boys,” I tease.

She giggles. “You sound like my uncle.” Her fingers begin to twirl her hair. “He’s taking me to his school dance.”

I can’t help but smile at what a cute date it sounds like. “Are you excited?”

Her nod comes quick and her eyes light up. “It’s my first date.”

That’s cute. “Your first date is a very important day.”

She nods but then her face falls slightly. “Except I don’t have anything to wear. None of my clothes are like what other people wear. I don’t want people to laugh at me.”

She looks a little crushed at the thought of people making fun of her and all I want to do at this point is help. “Well we can’t have that. You’re going to have to come to my store and I’m going to hook you up with a new dress.”

“Really?” Her voice is surprised. “But I can’t afford any of your clothes.”

“You don’t have to pay for it,” I say. “But when you’re all famous, I want a signed cd, okay?”

She gives me a huge grin and unexpectedly leans across the couch to give me a hug. Suddenly the sad, timid girl is gone. “Thank you so much, Cassie!”

I laugh and hug her back. “Don’t even worry about it.”

She pulls back and bounces a bit on the couch as she begins to tell me about the guy she’s going on her date with. I lean back and listen contently, feeling as though the past five minutes just made up for any of the crap that happened with my mother during the day.

“I’m going to break up with him, Hannah.”

The silence I’m met with on the other end of the line isn’t doing anything to reassure me and run my hand through my hair, completely agitated.

“Did you hear what I said?”

“Of course I did,” Hannah says, her voice welcoming and somewhat calming to my nerves. “You said you’re going to break up with Justin.”

I jump up from the couch I had just sat down in as her words met my ears. “I said I’m going to break up with Justin.”

“Exactly. So what’s changed in the last twenty four hours? When I talked to you yesterday you said everything was great between the two of you.”

“It was. But then this morning…he told me he loves me, Hannah.”

It’s quiet and then I can hear her drawing in a heavy breath. “Oh boy.”

“LOVE, Hannah. Not ‘I care about you’ or ‘You mean a lot to me’. Love. What do I even do with that?”

“So you don’t love him back.”

“I…” I drop back down to the couch. “I don’t know what I feel.”

“Could it possibly be love?”

“I like him, Hannah. A lot. But love him?”

“It’s been over two months. I could see that being a normal emotion to feel.”

So maybe I more than like Justin. But I was in no way ready to utter the words ‘love’. It’s sad and pathetic but at twenty five, I’ve never been in love before. My longest relationship was too casual to even consider using that word.

“Honestly, I don’t think I’d know it if I felt it.”

“You would know it if you felt it, Cassandra. And from how you talk about him and from what I saw of the two of you together, you’re further into this than just liking him.”

I hate that the thought scares me. I shouldn’t feel like this after hearing ‘I love you’ from someone I care about so much. I shouldn’t be considering breaking up with him over it.

“What exactly happened?”

I close my eyes as I remember this morning. “I was downstairs and making us breakfast and he came down and he just came out and said it.”

“What did you say?”

“I didn’t say anything at first and right away he said that if I wasn’t ready to say anything back, he didn’t want me to.”

“Well that’s good.”

“It was awkward,” I argue with a groan. “You don’t want someone to say that to you and then not be ready to say it back.”

“He was obviously feeling it so he went ahead and said it. And it sounds like he understands that you aren’t ready to say it. So what’s this crap about you breaking up with him?”

I sigh and curl into the corner of the couch, wishing I could sink so far into the cushions I wouldn’t ever have to emerge again. “I don’t know.”

“Correct me if I’m wrong but isn’t this the same thing that happened with Jared?”

I frown a bit. I guess I was hoping she wouldn’t remember that.

“You went out with him for like three months and you broke up with him when he said he loved you.”

“That was different,” I say, trying to defend myself. “He wasn’t in love with me and I wasn’t in love with him and him saying that he was told me that I should end things.”

“Uh huh.” Hannah sounds unconvinced. “Still sounds the same to me.”

“It’s not,” I say with as much conviction as I can muster.

“So why are you breaking up with him then?”

I lean my head against the side arm of the couch and stare across the room. “He just moves so fast and it scares me.”

“He said what he’s feeling, Cassandra. You can’t break up with him over that. And he said he wanted you to wait until you felt it to say it. It doesn’t sound like he’s pressuring you.”

I turn my face into the armrest and close my eyes. I know what she’s saying is true but I can’t help the twinge of panic that’s inside of me. I hate to admit it but people are right when they say commitment scares me. I want to run from it but I know that would be the stupidest thing I could do right now. What I feel for Justin is deep and I don’t want to ruin it.

“So I’m not going to break up with Justin.”

“That’s what I thought. So what you need to do is figure this out and stop freaking out. Having a guy like Justin say he loves you is NOT a bad thing. Trust me.”

She’s telling me what I already know. “You’re right.”

“And when you feel it you’ll know. So don’t stress about it, okay?”

I lift my head from the cushion and nod. “Okay.”

“You going to be alright?”

“Yeah. Thanks for talking to me.”

“Always.”

After hanging up with her, I stretch out on the couch and roll onto my back. I know everything Hannah says is right and I’m freaking out over something I really shouldn’t. But love…Love is permanent. You can’t just walk away from love. Love is commitment. Love is this huge step in comparison to the baby steps I’ve been taking and I don’t know if I’m ready for a leap like that.

* * *

I knew telling Cassie that I love her was going to freak her out. I knew she wouldn’t know what to say and probably wouldn’t respond. I didn’t expect her to leave my house ten minutes after I said it but I guess it shouldn’t be that much of a surprise.

I really hope I didn’t scare her off. I should have waited to say it but when I came downstairs this morning and saw her standing at the counter, simply wearing one of my t-shirts and some socks, making toast, the wave of emotion that came over me was so strong that I had to say it or I was going to explode. It had just burst out of my mouth and she had turned to me, her eyes wide and I watched as her breathing sped up. I had quickly told her that she didn’t have to say it back and she just nodded and went back to the food. Ten minutes later, she was dressed in her own clothes and saying something about needing to go to the store. I was pretty sure that was a lie but I let her go without question, deciding it wouldn’t be a good idea to push things. I said what I needed to say and now she knows.

I tried to go about my day as I always would after she left but a feeling of dread had settled itself in my stomach, making it impossible to pretend things were normal. What if telling her I love her is enough to push her commitment phobia self over the edge? This could just make her distance herself from me. Telling her that I love her when she wasn’t ready for it could have been a really stupid mistake.

My mind was in overtime when the doorbell rang that afternoon. I put down the newspaper I had been attempting to read for the past hour and went to answer the door. When I opened it and saw Cassie standing there, mixed feeling of happiness and dread wove through me. This could either be good or really bad.

“Hey,” I say, ushering her into the house. “I thought you were going to the store.”

“I lied,” she quickly says, pushing her shoes off. She runs a hand through her hair and looks around. She’s nervous. “I have to talk to you.”

“Okay,” I say and lead her out of the hallway and into the kitchen. “Is it about this morning?”

She nods and opens her mouth to speak but I cut her off.

“I know you probably weren’t ready to hear what I said and maybe I should have just waited,” I get out quickly. I lift my hands to run up and down her arms. “Please don’t freak out.”

“I’m not.” She pauses. “Okay, so I was. But I’m not anymore.”

I let my hands rest on her wrists. “You don’t have to feel the same way. I’m not pressuring you.”

“It’s just…” She trails off and looks to the side. She pulls her arms away from me and wraps them around herself. “I’ve…I’ve never been in love before, okay?”

This is news to me and I try and keep the surprised look off my face. “You haven’t?”

A small laugh, lacking in humor, escapes her. “No. Isn’t that stupid? Twenty five years old and never been in love.”

“It’s not stupid,” I quickly say. “Don’t think that. It doesn’t make you any less of a human to have not experienced that.”

“It’s just a little ridiculous.” Her voice lowers to almost a whisper. “I know that I freak out at commitment and that I need to change that because I’m not going to get very far in life if I don’t.”

I don’t say anything, not wanting to risk the chance of her stopping. This is probably the most open she’s ever been with me and I don’t want to ruin it.

“Love means commitment and that does scare me. But that’s okay. Because doing this all with you makes it a little less scary.”

I’m smiling as I pull her tightly against me in a hug. Having her tell me that she loves me too would be amazing but hearing her say this is almost as good. It’s just a promise for our future. “Good.”

Her hands lightly run up my back before settling on my shoulders. “Just…just be patient with me. This is all new to me.”

“Take as much time as you need,” I murmur into her hair. “There’s no rush with any of this.”

She nods and I rest my chin on the top of her head and breathe in deeply. She’s making no move to pull away and I contently hold her close to me. I want to tell her that maybe the reason she isn’t feeling as strongly as I do is because of this mess she’s got going on in her head. All these hang up she has about getting close to someone is making it impossible for her to feel the same deep emotions that I’m feeling for her. I want to tell her that she needs to just let it all go and things will make it so much easier.

Those are things she needs to figure out for herself though. She’s got things that she has to work through and I shouldn’t be doing it for her. Until then, I have to just be content with what she can give me and after hearing what she had to say, I think I can do that.

I’m almost never bored at work. I love sitting in the back and designing and sewing or being in the main show room with Kyle and talking with him and anyone who comes into the store. Often I have to force myself to leave at the end of the day because if I don’t I’ll end up staying all night long.

Today I’m just restless though. I’ve tried everything I can to get rid of the feeling. I’ve talked with Kyle about as much as I could, I’ve tried to finish three different dresses I have on the go. I’ve even gone on two coffee runs just to fill some time. The caffeine’s made me a bit jittery though and now I can’t even concentrate enough on my sketch pad in front of me. Instead of drawing, my pencil has taken to bouncing against my drawing board in an annoying tapping noise.

If it were any other day and I was feeling like this I would just pack up my stuff and go find someone to spend the rest of the day with. Justin was sick yesterday with a fever and he hasn’t called today to say otherwise so I’m assuming he’s still sick. I would go over but Lynn is here until tomorrow and he doesn’t really need two people trying to take care of him. I’ll just be in the way.

After Justin I would call up Rachel to see if she wanted to do something but she’s back in Tennessee visiting her family so she’s out of the picture.

Other than Justin and Rachel, my options are a bit limited, which is sad in itself. I really need to branch out and make some more friends. Kyle’s invited me out a few times to hang out with him and his friends and I should really take him up on that offer. He did mention something about going out to dinner with some people once we closed today and maybe I can join him. It would be better than going home to my empty house and sitting around all night.

“Cassandra, you have a call.”

I look up from my sketch pad to see Kyle standing in the doorway with the cordless phone with him. Grateful for the distraction, I smile and push my chair back.

“Do you know who it is?”

“Said her name was Lynn.”

My eyebrows draw together a bit. “Lynn?” Why would she be calling me? Granted, the more time we spend together, the better we get along, but she’s one of the last people I would expect to call me up to talk. “Did she say what it’s about?”

Kyle shakes his head. “No.”

I take the phone from him. “Okay. Thanks.”

He smiles at me and then leaves, shutting the door behind him. Once I’m alone, I turn on the phone and raise it to my ear.

“Hello?”

“Cassandra, it’s Lynn Harless.”

I’ve never heard Lynn sound anything but calm but right now she sounds completely stressed out and a string of anxiety goes through me. “Hi. Is everything okay?”

“No, it’s not. I’m at the hospital with Justin.”

My heart has never dropped so fast. “What happened?”

“He was feeling worse this morning and when I finally got him to the hospital, they said he had appendicitis. But before they could get him into surgery his appendix ruptured.”

My knees buckle a bit and luckily there’s a chair under me or I would have sunk right down the floor. “Is he okay?” I manage to get out, my voice strained.

“They just took him into surgery about half an hour ago. I haven’t heard anything yet.”

A curse slips from my mouth before I can stop it and I squeeze my eyes shut tightly, trying to keep myself together. You can die from a ruptured appendix. I’ve seen enough medical shows to know that. “Is…is it okay if I-”

“Of course you should come,” Lynn cuts me off, answering my question. “That’s why I called you. Trace is already on his way.”

“Okay.” It’s not hard to get words out with the giant lump in my throat. “Okay. I’m leaving now. Which hospital?”

“St. Mary’s. Sixth floor.”

“Okay. Thanks, Lynn.”

“I’ll see you soon.”

I hang up the phone and let it drop to the table with a thud. In a bit of a daze, I grab my purse and quickly leave the store, mumbling something to Kyle about an emergency on my way by.

I know there’s nothing I can do, but I still want to be at the hospital as quickly as I can and I speed through the streets as best I can. Tears start to prickle my eyes when I finally have to stop for a red light.

Things can change so quickly when you least expect it. This isn’t some joke. Justin could actually die from this and I won’t have had a chance to say goodbye. The last time I saw him was two days ago and I haven’t even really said goodbye to him because I had been late for an appointment and was in a rush. If that was the last time I ever saw him that would kill me. I didn’t even kiss him goodbye.

My mind is all over the place and I can hardly concentrate enough to get to the hospital in one piece. I try to keep any tears at bay but a couple fall down my cheeks as wait for the elevator. By time I reach the sixth floor, my breathing is a bit uneven and I have to keep blinking rapidly to keep tears from falling.

I’ve never been in this hospital and I don’t know the first place to go. Trace is one of the first people I see when I get off the elevator and just seeing a familiar face causes just a bit of relief to go through me. He’s on the phone but his eyes connect with mine and he gives me a smile. He’s always so calm and laid back but even through his smile I can see the slight anxious look on his face and my stomach clenches. He points to the hallway across from him and I walk past him to the waiting room.

Lynn is one of the few people sitting in the room and she’s sitting off in a corner couch. I walk towards her and she looks up at me as I near.

“Oh good, Cassandra, you’re here,” she says, standing up. She looks more put together than I feel but when she reaches out to hug me I find that there’s a slight quiver to her body.

“How is he?” I ask, pulling back.

Lynn takes a deep breath and runs her hands down the front of her pants. “He’s still in surgery. I haven’t heard anything new.”

That’s not what I wanted to hear. I wanted Lynn to say that he was out of surgery and completely fine. That he would be back to normal by tomorrow. “What happened?” I ask, running my hands through my hair. “He only had a fever yesterday.”

Lynn drops back down to the couch and shakes her head. “I think it was worse than he was letting on. It must have been. By noon today he could hardly even stand and that’s when I brought him here.”

I sink down beside her. “Is he going to be okay?”

“He was in surgery minutes after his appendix ruptured,” Lynn says. “Which is good.” She breathes in deeply and a forced smile appears on her lips. “He’ll be fine, Cassandra. He’s a tough boy.”

“I can’t believe this,” I murmur, leaning back into the couch. The cushions are hard and unforgiving and I can’t get comfortable. That doesn’t bother me too much though. I don’t want to be comfortable in this place.

Lynn’s words have lowered my stress a bit but not by much. I can’t tell if she’s just trying to reassure herself and me that he’ll be okay when in reality he may not be. A ruptured appendix is much worse than appendicitis. A ruptured appendix means toxins were coursing through his body.

Vomit rises in my throat at that thought and I swallow hard, forcing it back down. I need to calm down until I know more. He may be perfectly fine.

He has to be fine. I can’t handle it if he’s not fine. I’ve taken everything he is for granted. If it’s all taken away from me…I don’t know what I’ll do.

The next two hours are the longest of my life. I try to distract myself by sketching but my mind can’t concentrate long enough on it. Trace keeps getting up to make phone calls and when he’s sitting with Lynn and I, he’s filling up the silence with meaningless chatter that neither of us want to participate in. And Lynn is mostly quiet, staring out the window beside her and fingering the necklace around her neck.

It’s close to six o’clock when a doctor comes into the room and comes over to us. Lynn jumps up but I stay seated. I don’t think my legs would hold me if the news is bad.

“Is he okay?” Lynn asks before the doctor can even open his mouth.

“He’ll be fine. He’s out of surgery and in recovery. We were able to get in there in time.”

Immediate relief goes through me and a large breath of air that I didn’t know I was holding comes out of my mouth in a gust. I lean back in the couch and shut my eyes as I say a silent prayer.

“Thank God,” Lynn says, wringing her hands together. “Can I see him?”

“He’s still under anesthesia but he should be conscious soon and when he does wakes up someone will come get you to go see him.”

“Thank you so much,” Lynn says. She sits down on the couch as the doctor leaves but then quickly stands up again. “I need to call Paul and let him know.”

I lean my head down to rub my temples as Lynn leaves the waiting room. I don’t look up until I feel a hand on my knee. Trace gives me a reassuring smile when I look up.

“I told you he’d be okay,” he says. “When Justin dies it’s gonna be a cooler death than appendicitis. He’ll die skydiving or some shit like that.”

A small laugh escapes me and that alone causes a million tones of pressure to be released off my chest. “Yeah.” I hug my arms around myself and stare across the room. It’s quiet for a second before I turn back to Trace. “I need coffee. Do you want some?”

“I can’t handle hospital coffee so I’ll pass. But thanks.”

I probably won’t like hospital coffee much either but at this point I need something in me to take off the edge. Any bit of caffeine will help. I pull my wallet from my bag and stand up. “Okay.”

The cafeteria is easy to find and within a few minutes I have the largest cup of coffee I could find in my hands. I stay in the cafeteria for a few minutes, the change in scenery a welcome relief. I’ve come to loathe the peachy color of the waiting room walls over the past few hours and I don’t want to return to it right away. So instead I take a seat at an empty table in the corner and watch everyone around me as I sip at my coffee. I’m so relieved that Justin’s surgery went well that I can’t even form any thoughts as I sit there. I let myself zone out for a good ten minutes before getting up and tossing my half empty cup into the garbage. That was probably the worst cup of coffee I’ve ever had but at least it did the trick of calming me down a little bit.

Trace is in the hallway again when I get back to the sixth floor. He pulls the phone from his mouth as I near him. “He’s awake.”

My heart jumps a bit. “He is?”

“Lynn’s in there.”

“Did you see him?”

“Nah. Out of the three of you I’m pretty sure I’m last on the list.” His eyes move past me and he nods in that direction before turning back to the phone. I turn to look in that direction and see Lynn coming down the hallway.

“How is he?” I ask when she reaches me.

She smiles at me. “A little out of it but he’s awake. He wants to see you.”

Some warmth spreads through me at her words. “What room?”

“I’ll show you.”

I walk with Lynn down the hallway, a bit anxious. I want to see him so bad but I’m scared he’s going to look really sick. I’ve never seen him sick.

Lynn stops at a half open doorway. “There you go, Sweetie.”

My eyes trained on the door, I listen to her walk down the hallway. After a short moment, I take a deep breath and slip into the room.

Justin’s head is turned in the opposite direction but as soon as my feet scrape against the floor, he turns to me and a weak smile spreads over his lips.

“Hey,” he says softly, his voice a bit raspy.

I smile and cross the room to his bed. His face is pale and there’s circles under his eyes but his eyes are the same as always and I feel so much better now that I can see him.

“Hey,” I reply, sitting down in the chair next to the bed. I pick up his hand in mine, careful to not jostle his IV. “How are you feeling?”

“Like a million bucks,” he says, his eyes slowly closing.

I lean in close to the bed and bring my hand up to run over his head. “I was so scared.”

He smiles a bit and opens his eyes to meet mine. “I’m fine, Cass.”

I want to chastise him for letting it get so bad and not going to the hospital earlier but I don’t want to waste our time together doing that. I lean down to kiss his knuckles and close my eyes briefly before opening them to meet his.

“When your mom called me and told me I was so scared. You could have died and I would have lost you.”

“Cass, I’m tougher than I look.”

“Shh…” I say, kissing his knuckles again. “Let me talk for a second.” I keep my mouth pressed against his hand for a few seconds longer before continuing. “It shouldn’t have happened this way but it made me realize something.”

Justin wets his lips and doesn’t take his eyes off me. “What?”

I can feel tears come to my eyes again and I blink a couple times. “I love you so much. The thought of losing you made me realize how much I love you.”

His smile is tired but unwavering. “Cass…”

“It might scare me but it’s there. It’s been there but it took me this to really realize it.”

“I love you too.”

A smile comes from deep inside and spreads across my lips. It felt good to hear him say it but it feels even better to say it back and truly mean it.

“I know I’m a sicky but can I have a real kiss?”

I laugh slightly and stand up so I can lean over the bed. I’m careful when I kiss him, not wanting to hurt him. The kiss is just as amazing as always though and my heart swells a bit more. When I pull back, I rest my forehead lightly against his.

“You have to be patient with me though,” I whisper to him. “This is all new to me.”

He smiles. “That’s fine with me.”

I pull away and sit back down, picking up his hand again. My eyes flicker to the door when a nurse walked by.

“Think they’re going to come in here and kick me out?”

His eyes close but the smile stays on his face. “Until they do, I want you to stay right here with me.”

There’s nothing I want to do more in the world. “Well I guess I can’t refuse a sicky, right?”

Cassie smiles as she fusses with the blankets around me. “Don’t tell her that.”

“She offered to stay for another week.”

“Why didn’t you take her up on it?”

I shrug and lean my head back against the pillow propped up against the headboard of my bed. “Because you hate when I’m a momma’s boy and need her around me.”

Cassie’s face is serious when she looks up at me. “Justin, you had surgery five days ago and if you want your mom here then she should be here. And I don’t hate that you’re close with your mom.”

I smile. “I was kidding, Cass. Mom has stuff she has to do back home and I don’t need her here when I’ve got you.”

Cassie straightens and puts her hand on her hip. “Except I have that meeting I have to go to this afternoon.” Her eyebrows draw together a bit. “Are you going to be okay by yourself?”

Both her and my mom have been treating me like I’m made out of glass. It was actually a relief when Trace came over yesterday, punched me in the arm, and called me a girl for watching Oprah. “I’ll be fine. It’s only like a couple hours you’ll be gone, right?”

She begins to chew on her lip and my stomach drops a bit as I anticipate her next words. “Well the meeting is only supposed to go an hour or two but Kyle invited me out to dinner later with him and some of his friends.”

I don’t bother to hide the emotions going over my face. “Oh.”

Cassie’s eyes move to the window and then back to me. “I can tell him I can’t go,” she says quickly. “You shouldn’t be here all alone. You might need something.”

My first instinct is to just agree with her but my conscience holds me back. I know that it’s been bothering Cassie that she doesn’t know a lot of people in LA and she’s probably looking forward to meeting some new people. Besides, the pain medication I’m taking knocks me out and even if she came over here, I’d probably just be sleeping anyways.

“No, go. If I really need something I’ll just call Rach. I’ll probably end up sleeping all afternoon anyways.”

“Are you sure?”

She looks really concerned at this point and it makes me smile. “Absolutely.” I glance at the clock quickly. “Are you going home before your meeting?”

“I don’t have to.”

I lift up the blankets she’s just tucked around me. “Then get in.”

She smiles and carefully climbs into bed beside me. I put my arm around her shoulders and pull her close to me, her body fitting perfectly against mine. We’re both quiet for a minute before she breaks it.

“I think I’m going to New York in a few weeks.”

I shift a bit before settling back against the pillows. “For what?”

“There’s some fashion shows I really wanted to see going on and I want to meet with some potential buyers there.”

“Are you going alone?”

“Kyle will stay behind to run the store.” She stops and I can tell with a quick glance of her face that she’s struggling with her next words. “Do you want to come?”

It makes me smile when she finally gets them out. She’s always had issues with doing or saying things that are signs of deeper commitment in our relationship. But she’s getting better and loosening up, even if it does sometimes take work to get the words out of her.

“I would have to check my schedule. I would love to go but depends on how much is left with Bridget’s album.”

She doesn’t seem put off by that. “Okay.”

“But I think we should go on vacation.”

She looks over at me and bites on her lip for a second before smiling. “Where?”

“Hawaii, Mexico, Caribean. Somewhere where it’s so hot you’ll just opt to go naked the entire time.”

She begins to laugh and if I wasn’t sporting a whole bunch of stitches, she probably would elbow me in the side. “Perv.”

I keep a straight face. “Seriously. You’d do that, right? We could rent a bungalow on a private beach and it would just be me and you….naked…”

She’s still laughing. “How many drugs have you had today?”

“Not enough.” I move around again, trying to find a comfortable position.

“Have you taken anything this morning?”

“I took a pill when I woke up at nine.”

She looks at her watch. “That was five hours ago. You should take another.”

I start to shake my head but the look she shoots in my direction quickly stops me.

“Stop trying to be all macho and take your dam pills,” she says. “You just had a knife cut through your body and a part of you removed.”

My nose wrinkles a bit. “You really have a way with your words, you know that?”

She gives me a bright smile and then, despite my attempts to keep her still, pulls away from me and crawls out of bed. I close my eyes as she goes to my bathroom and don’t open them again until the smell of cherry blossoms meets my nose once again.

“Pill,” she says simply, handing me my pain killers. “Water.”

I dutifully take it and then grab for her hand again. “Come back to bed.”

She looks like she wants to but a look at her watch prevents it from happening. “I need to go really soon. I have to get gas and stop at the bank.”

I wish I could make laying in bed with me appealing enough but the fact is that I haven’t showered in a couple days and I’ve completely given up on shaving at this point. I should be glad she even laid here with me at all. “Okay.”

“Don’t pout at me like that. You’re going to be asleep within fifteen minutes anyways.”

I let the pathetic look fall from my face since she’s completely right. “So how long will you be out tonight?”

“Um…I’m not exactly sure.”

“Will you come here after? Rach is still in Tennessee and Trace isn’t any help. And now that Mom’s back home I just don’t want to be all alone so-”

Her lips against mine cut me off. “Of course I’m going to come over tonight. Hopefully I’ll be here by like seven or eight.”

“I’ll be awake. And if I’m not, wake me up.”

She nods even though I know she won’t wake me up if I’m sleeping. She kisses me once more, her lips lingering against mine. “I need to go. I’m going to be late.”

I really wish she’d just blow off her meeting and stay but I know there’s no way that’s going to happen. “Okay. Call me if you get bored.”

She nods and gives me a smile. With one last quick kiss, she leaves my room, half shutting the door behind her. I wait until I hear the front door close before moving into a fully laying position on my bed and pulling up the blankets around me. It doesn’t take long for the pill to kick in and within ten minutes I’m asleep.

The medicine completely knocks me out for a good four hours and it’s after six when I wake up. The moment I become conscious I wish I wasn’t. My head is pounding and my neck is sore from how I slept. I make a move to turn onto my side and immediately realize just how much my incision hurts.

“Shit,” I mumble. I squeeze my eyes shut and try to relax the rest of my body. After a few minutes pass and I still feel like crap, I decide the only thing that could possibly help is a hot shower, even though that seems like way too much effort at this point. But after a small pep talk, I manage to get out of bed and make my way to the bathroom.

Although the shower takes a lot of effort, I feel a hundred times better when I emerge. I’m feeling renewed enough to grab my electric razor and shave off the six day stubble that’s covering my face. The final result satisfies me and I know that Cassie will be pleased. She’s been griping about my facial hair ever since I got home from the hospital.

I feel almost human again as I leave the bathroom and find some fresh clothes to put on. I don’t even entertain the thought of getting back in bed. Just looking at the crumpled sheets is making me feel sluggish again and I can’t take one more minute laying there. I’ve been staring at these four walls for the past three days and I’m on the verge of going stir crazy.

I’m really wishing I had someone to keep me company right about now. Cassie’s meeting was at three so she probably ended up going for dinner around five. One hour isn’t enough time for her to be done so I resist calling her cell phone. I’ll call at seven.

My mom made a whole bunch of food before she left so I wouldn’t have to worry about food and I pull out one of the Tupperwear containers of pasta from the fridge. Phone in hand, I sprawl out in front of the TV in the den, eat, and wait for Cassie to either call me or get here.

By seven I’ve exercised enough patience and I pick up the phone to call Cassie’s cell. Some annoyance seeps through me when her voicemail picks up after four rings. I don’t bother leaving a message and with a frown, hang up. She always picks up her phone. What could she possibly be doing that she wouldn’t hear it?

Maybe I’ve just been alone too long and I’m getting paranoid but my brain starts to go into overdrive as I sit there and stare at the TV.

Maybe she’s just choosing to not pick up the phone. Maybe she’s tired of having to take care of me and she thinks that I’m calling her to tell her she has to come here and she’s avoiding me. She’s probably having fun with Kyle and thinks I’m going to ruin it. Kyle.

The frown turns into a scowl. It’s probably just because I’m irritated but suddenly I don’t like the fact that she’s hanging around Kyle. I’ve met him enough times to decide that he’s got some kind of crush on Cassie. It’s obvious the way he looks at her. Before it didn’t matter because I was pretty sure it was just this harmless thing and she would never do anything with him. But now it really matters. I don’t want her hanging around some guy who wants her.

My irritation grows with each passing minute. By time seven thirty hits and the phone still hasn’t rang, I’m completely fed up. I’m sick of being alone.

The phone only rings three times before Cassie’s voice comes over the line.

“Hello?”

She’s laughing as she says it and I can hear people laughing in the background. There’s something about knowing she’s out having fun while I’m stuck sitting here that worsens my mood a bit more. “Are you still at dinner?” I ask, trying to keep the sourness out of my voice.

“Yeah. We’re almost done eating.”

“Why didn’t you pick up before?”

She doesn’t answer right away and instead I hear her laughing with someone. I frown a bit as I wait for her.

“Sorry, what?”

“I called you before and you didn’t pick up.”

“Oh really? I must not have heard it. Did you need something?”

“I just wanted to know when you’d be back.”

“Soon. Maybe half an hour.”

There’s more talking in the background and Cassie is once again distracted for a moment before bringing her attention back on me.

“Okay well we’re going to leave soon and then I’ll come over there.”

“Fine.”

“Bye.”

She hangs up abruptly and I sigh and drop the phone on the couch beside me. Maybe I’m just being selfish but I’m the one who just had surgery and she should be here with me and not out with other people. I should have taken her up on her offer to stay when I had been given the chance. I hate that I’m just sitting in this big, empty house all by myself.

It’s a bit after eight when I hear the sound of the front door closing. I gave Cassie a key to my house a week ago but have yet to receive one back from her. I think that still freaks her out too much.

I don’t bother getting up or even moving as I listen to her move through the house. She calls my name a couple times but responding seems like too much effort at this point. “There you are. Why didn’t you say anything?”

I look away from the TV and to Cassie when she appears in the doorway. I stare at her for a second before shrugging.

“Are you feeling okay? You look better.”

I pull my arm away from her when she touches it. “Have fun with Kyle?” I ask, not being able to hold it in anymore.

She pulls her hand away from me and places it on her hip as she stares at me. “What?”

I don’t respond and instead return my eyes to the TV.

She’s silent for a minute before speaking. “I’m going to put that comment on the fact that you’re tired and not feeling great and not that you would actually ask me that question in that tone of voice otherwise.”

I hate that she doesn’t give in to my obvious attempts to start conflict and is instead a mature adult. It just makes me feel stupid.

“It was just a question,” I mumble, picking up the remote.

“It wasn’t just a question,” she replies and then turns and walks out of the room. I watch her retreating form but make no move to stand. I realize I’m a complete ass for asking her that question in a way to insinuating that she was doing more than just having dinner with Kyle but I couldn’t stop myself. I chalk it up to the fact that I haven’t taken any pain medication since early this afternoon and my side is killing me.

I wait for ten minutes for her to reappear. When it doesn’t happen, I make myself shut off the TV and get up. I slowly walk through the house until I go into the kitchen and through the French doors, see her on the patio outside. She’s simply standing at the railing, her back to me, and her arms wrapped around herself. I stop by the doors and watch her for a minute. Now that I’ve done it, I feel bad for being so rude to her. She’s here to take care of me and I jump down her throat for going out with her friends.

She turns her head when I open the door and doesn’t break eye contact with me as I walk over to her.

“I’m tired and annoyed,” I say when I’m nearer to her. “I wouldn’t have said that otherwise.”

“That’s your excuse?”

I cringe a bit. “It’s not an excuse. I’m just saying.”

“I don’t handle jealousy well,” she says, her arms dropping to her sides. “So don’t start to get upset when I hang around people who aren’t you or Trace or Rachel.”

I silently curse. Is that seriously what she thinks I’m doing? “I’m not upset. It’s just…Kyle.”

“What about him?”

“He likes you. I can tell from the times I’ve been around you and him.”

Her shoulders slump a bit and she shakes her head. “Justin…”

“What? Don’t you see it?”

“We’re business partners.”

“No you’re his boss. And he knows we’re dating.”

She sighs and looks around the yard. “I think that this isn’t the time to be talking about this.”

“You’re skirting around the issue.”

Her eyes meet mine. “You’re right, I am skirting around the issue because I don’t want to go there with you.”

I want to make her see it how I see it but the stubborn look on her face tells me that the subject is closed. And when deciding whether I want to spend the rest of my night fighting with her, the decision isn’t hard.

“Then we won’t talk about it,” I say. “Not now.”

“Good.” She changes the subject abruptly. “Have you taken your pills?”

“Not since you left.”

Shaking her head, she puts her hand on my elbow and pulls me towards the house. “Do you think it makes you look tougher to not take pain medication?”

I smile a bit as we walk into the house. “Absolutely.”

She mumbles something about the male species and then moves ahead of me to go upstairs, leaving me to trail slowly behind her. I’m exhausted by time I reach the top stair and when I get to my bedroom, I go straight to my bed. Cassie comes out of my bathroom with a full glass of water just as I’m getting settled under the covers.

“Are you needing to sleep?” she asks, handing me the water and a pill.

“No. I just need to lay down.” I swallow the pill and then turn my eyes back on Cassie. “You don’t have to, but are you going to stay here tonight?”

She points to the bag sitting in the corner of the room that I’ve somehow missed seeing all day. “I was planning on it.”

“You should change and grab a movie to put in,” I say, praying she’ll agree to do that. After me being a jerk to her, she may not want to hang around me all night.

My prayers are answered when Cassie nods and disappears into the bathroom with her bag. When she reappears, I smile to see her in this pajama short and cami set I picked out for her at Victoria Secret. If I had more energy, I’d say screw the movie. But for now, none of that is possible and I have to be content with her laying beside me, her body curled into mine.

“You didn’t actually put in Sweet Home Alabama, did you?” I ask as the opening credits play across the screen of the TV.

She smiles and kisses the corner of my jaw. “You’re the one who has it in his collection.”

“It’s Rachel’s,” I say with a sigh. “Cass, can’t we watch an action movie or something? This is going to make me fall asleep.”

I can feel her smile against my skin and she kisses me again. “Good. You need your rest.”

I don’t bother protesting anymore. Maybe I’m just whipped, but I guess there are worse things in the world than laying in bed with a gorgeous girl, even if a cheesy chick flick is involved.

True to form, I’m late. My plane was only a couple minutes past the scheduled arrival but I hate fighting to get off planes so I always end up waiting until the aisles are clear. And today, I was really into a sketch that I didn’t even notice that the plane had cleared out until a stewardess came and asked me if everything was alright.

The other side of the arrivals gate was pretty empty when I walk through and it isn’t hard to spot Justin waiting for me. He’s sitting alone on a row of seats and has his phone pressed to his ear. When I near him and he sees me, he snaps his phone shut and stands.

“I thought you missed your flight,” he says. “Everyone else already came out.”

I stand on my toes and give him a quick kiss. “I got distracted and didn’t notice everyone else was off the plane.”

He smiles and shakes his head as his arms wrap around me. I’m pulled into his body and I let my own arms loop around his neck. Now that I’m standing here with him I realize just how much I’ve missed him the past six days.

“I’ve really missed you,” he says, his lips dangerously close to mine.

I wet my lips and I breathe in deeply, the scent of his cologne filling my lungs. “I missed you too.”

“Oh yeah? How much?”

A smile plays at the corner of my lips. “If we weren’t in the middle of LAX, I’d show you.”

He laughs and his arms tighten, squeezing my body against his. “Damn, it’s so good to have you back,” he says with a sigh. His lips trail from my temple towards my mouth and my eyes flutter shut. Any stress from the past couple days disappears when his lips find mine and he kisses me deeply. It doesn’t even matter that we’re in a busy airport and there’s a million people everywhere. All that matters at this point is Justin.

He kisses me slowly and deeply and doesn’t pull back until my legs feel a little weak. I can honestly say I’ve never had a guy leave me weak in the knees before him. Of course, Justin’s blown all of the other guys completely out of the water.

His lips slowly part from mine and he places a couple quick kisses on my nose before pulling his head back from mine.

“We better grab your bags.”

“Mm hmm,” I agree, letting my arms drop from his neck. He steps back and grabs my hand and intertwines his fingers with mine as we walk through the airport. He asks about New York and I tell him everything that’s happened over the past six days. A lot of it I’ve already told him and I’m sure it’s boring him but he just let’s me talk.

I remember one time probably over a month ago I was telling him this long drawn out story and stopped at a certain point because I knew it had to have been boring him to death. But he had said that he didn’t care what I was talking about, he just liked to hear my voice. Ever since then I never feel self conscious about going off on rants or tangents around him.

When we finally reach his car I take a break from talking about New York. “How’s Bridget’s album?”

Justin smiles and puts the car into reverse. “Done.”

“Really?” When I left for New York, they had still had to finish three songs. “That’s great.”

“Bridget wanted you to hear it so I have a copy at my house for you.”

“Perfect.”

I’ve come to completely love Bridget over the past month. Ever since I helped her out with her first date, she’s completely opened up to me and even called me at the store a few times when she needs to talk to which I’m only too happy to oblige. She’s surrounded by males for most of the day and I know I’d go crazy after a while too. She’s reminds me of Elodie when she was younger and I’m glad Bridget feels like she can open up to me.

“So do you want to go straight to your house or what?” Justin asks as he pulls out onto the freeway.

“Can we stop at the store?” I ask. “I wanted to check in and see how everything went. I haven’t talked to Kyle since Tuesday.”

“Sure. Do you need to stay long through?”

I reach across the console and grab Justin’s hand and give it a squeeze. “No. Just long enough to catch up on what’s been happening the past couple days.”

“And then…?”

I smile at him. “And then we’ll go to my house, order some take out, and get a movie.”

His smile turns satisfied and he rests our joined hands on his leg. As we drive towards Beverly Hills, he tells me about Bridget’s album and all the work they’ve done over the past week. I lean my head back against the seat and listen contently. It’s so good to be here with him that I just want to soak up every thing about him and every single word he says. I’m almost sad when he parks in front of my store because I just want to be alone with him longer. But I get him to myself all evening so that will hopefully cure this craving.

Kyle’s behind the main counter and he looks up when we enter. An infectious smile breaks across his face when his eyes connect with me and I can’t help but return it.

“Hey, you’re back,” he says, coming around the counter.

“I came straight from the airport,” I say, flexing my fingers a bit hoping Justin will loosen his suddenly too tight grip on my hand.

“How was New York?”

“Great. I got Saks.”

Kyle’s smile grows. “Awesome. I knew you’d get them.”

Justin’s foot is taping on the floor and I can tell that he’s anxious to go. I kind of want to stay and tell Kyle all about New York but at the same time, I know I’m going to be here all day tomorrow and it’s been a long six days since I’ve seen Justin.

“I just stopped by to grab a few things,” I say, breaking the slightly awkward silence that’s fallen over us. I pull my hand away from Justin’s and move towards my office. “I’ll be back in a second,” I saw before Justin can follow me.

Maybe it’s cruel of me, but I want Justin to be alone with Kyle. Ever since his snide comment on Kyle a couple weeks back, the subject has never been brought up again. I honestly don’t know where the hostility towards Kyle came from but I don’t want to deal with it. If Justin can just spend some time with him maybe he’ll figure out that he’s not a bad guy. They could probably get along great if given the opportunity to get to know one another and I’ve made it a goal to make that happen.

I take my time gathering my things and then regress about ten years and stand off to the side of the door, trying to eavesdrop on their conversation, which I know will be happening. Kyle can’t stand awkward silences and he’ll talk just to fill them and Justin’s not rude enough to completely ignore him.

I can hear muffled male voices but I’m too far away to really hear what words are being spoken. After an unsuccessful minute, I give up and leave the office.

Justin’s face is stony as he listens to Kyle talking about some new LA band. His arms are crossed over his chest and he looks like he would rather be anywhere but here. I step further into the room and when his eyes meet mine, the hard expression melts off his face and he interrupts Kyle mid sentence.

“Are you ready?”

“Yeah.” I turn to Kyle and inwardly wince at the uncomfortable look on his face. Maybe it wasn’t a good idea to leave them to fend for themselves. “I’m coming in early tomorrow morning so I’ll see you when you get here.”

“Sure.” He smiles. “I’ll bring the coffee?”

My lips turn up. “Sounds perfect. Sugar free-”

“Nonfat vanilla latte,” Kyle finishes for me. “I remember.”

I laugh and am about to retort when Justin’s quiet voice interrupts.

“Cassie?”

I glance over at him and quickly nod and turn back to Kyle. “So I’ll see you tomorrow.”

“Sure.”

I give him a wave and then follow Justin outside. I wait until we’re both in the car before speaking, trying to make my question sound light and innocent.

“So what were you guys talking about?”

Justin doesn’t look at me as he turns on the car and checks over his shoulder for traffic. “Some band his friend is in.”

He doesn’t take the bait to go off on a rant about Kyle, which I was kind of hoping he would. I know we need to talk about it but I don’t want to be the one to bring it up and I’m waiting for him to say something.

I really don’t even know why I’m trying to ruin this reunion by trying to broach the subject of Kyle. I should just be happy that I’m back in LA with Justin.

Reaching over, I grab his hand again and pull it towards me. “Do I get to pick the movie tonight?”

He smiles for the first time since we stepped into the store. “Don’t think so. I can’t handle any of your cheesy movies tonight.”

I let out a dramatic sigh, even though it really doesn’t bother me too much. We could be watching the history channel for all I care. It’s not like we ever really watch the movie when we’re laying there together.

“I want to stop by my house and grab a change of clothes for tomorrow. I have a meeting with Scott Morter at ten tomorrow morning.”

It takes me a minute before I place Scott Morter as Justin’s agent. “What for?”

“I got offered a role in this movie and he wants to give me the script and talk to me about it.”

This is news to me. When I first met Justin he was very into his clothing line. By time I moved out to LA, he was all about producing Bridget’s album. I never even thought about him doing another movie and he’s never mentioned it before right now.

“A movie? You never said anything about that before.”

He shrugs. “It hasn’t really been anything until Scott called me yesterday. He just got called about it then.”

“Will you take it?”

“Depends on the role and the script. I’ll have to read it.”

“Can I read it after you’re done?”

He smiles over at me. “You’re more excited than I am,” he teases, squeezing my hand. “Yes, you can read it but you can’t tell anyone I let you. I think that’s kind of something I’m not supposed to do.”

I make a zipping motion over my lips. “Sealed and in the vault.” I rub my thumb over his knuckles. “So how long will your meeting go tomorrow?”

“Maybe an hour. And after that I was thinking I should come get you from work and go for lunch.”

That sounds appealing. “Perfect.”

“And Rachel’s having some sort of dinner party thing tomorrow night and told me to bring you.” He pauses and gives me a side glance. “Okay so now it seems like I’m monopolizing you. We don’t have to do all that if it’s going to make you sick of me.”

I can’t help but laugh a bit at that. “Let’s do it all. I think I’ll survive.”

Sometimes I don’t think he realizes that at this point, I feel like I’m never going to get sick of him. A month ago, that thought was scary. But now…maybe it’s not such a terrifying thing.

There’s that moment in between sleep and fully waking up when all the worries and stress of the previous day are non existent. It’s this blissfully unaware state in which everything is perfect and life could never be better.

I really need to find a way to stay in that state permanently. About ten seconds after I wake up at nine o’clock memories of the day before come crashing down, creating a heavy lump in my stomach.

Yesterday had been like any other day. Probably better in fact because Justin had said he had a surprise for me and made this fancy dinner at his house for us. And everything had been great until he had sprung on me the reason for the celebration. All the contracts for the new movie he was doing were complete and they were starting shooting next week.

In Hawaii. For three months.

That had kind of put a damper on the evening.

Justin is the person I’m closest to and spend the most time with in LA and he’s leaving for three months. And he’s taking Rachel, the second most person I’m closest with, with him as his personal assistant.

Needless to say, after that news was dropped on me, I could hardly even pretend to be happy for him. Three months can go by fast but not when your boyfriend is across the country. Not when I’m going to go from seeing him almost every day to only seeing him on scheduled times that are convenient with my schedule and his.

Justin could see my obvious drop in enthusiasm and he tried to cheer me up by telling me he’d get me down there whenever I could take time off work, even if it was just a day or two. He said that it would be like a vacation whenever I would see him. And that really, three months would fly by and I wouldn’t even miss him.

Neither of us chose to acknowledge what complete bullshit that really is.

I’m not scared of not being able to see him all the time. That’s not the problem. I’m scared something might change.

At four and a half months, my relationship with Justin is closing in on my longest relationship ever and it’s definitely the most serious one I’ve ever had. I love Justin more than most people in my life and at this point I really can’t imagine life without him. But it’s taken a lot to get to this point and I don’t want us being separated by hundreds of miles to change any of that.

I’m more than likely being a little paranoid about the entire thing but even telling myself that I can’t shake the depressed feeling inside. Everything was going so perfectly between us and I don’t want the chance of anything ruining that.

Rolling onto my side, I curl into a ball and stare at the blue walls across from me. I should be happy for Justin. He got a part in this movie he really wanted to do and I feel like I put a damper on his excitement by being sad he’s leaving. I tried to hide it but he saw it and it sobered him up a bit.

I guess I’m a bit of a bitch for making it about me.

Ten minutes after being awake, I close my eyes again and will myself to go back to sleep. At least when I’m asleep I don’t have to think about all this.

I’m actually able to drift into a light sleep but the sound of my front door opening pulls me back to reality. I open my eyes and am slightly concerned for a minute until I remember that I gave Justin a key to my house last week in case of emergencies. I guess he’s putting it to good use.

My eyes are closed again by time the door to my bedroom opens. He’s going to want to talk and I just don’t think I can do that without crying.

“Cass,” his voice says soft. It sounds like he doesn’t even expect a response so I stay quiet. There’s some shuffling and then a bit of cool air hits me as the covers are pulled back. I can’t stop the sigh from escaping me when his warm body slides behind me.

“So you are awake,” he says as he pulls himself close behind me.

I don’t open my eyes until his arm slides around me. “Mm hmm.”

He clasps my hand resting on the pillow by my cheek with his and I watch him intertwine our fingers. Neither of us move for a minute until he nuzzles his face into my neck and kisses the skin there.

“I love you.”

A shiver goes through me at his quiet words and I grip his hand tightly. “I love you too.”

I can feel his breath on the back of my neck. “That’s really all we need to make this work, you know. Three months in different states isn’t going to change that.”

Tears come to my eyes before I can stop them. I blink once and one slides down my cheek. When it falls and hits his hand, he sighs.

“Cass…”

I sniff and curse myself for crying. “I’m sorry,” I whisper, trying to keep the quiver from my voice. “I’m happy you got the part. I really am.”

His lips connect to my neck again. “I know you are,” he mumbles against my skin. “And I know you’re also upset.”

I pull in a deep breath and shut my eyes as tight as I can. “No, I’m fine.”

He lets out a small chuckle. “Babe, you’re not fine. You’re crying.”

I open my eyes in defeat and stare at the wall. “I’m trying not to.”

He laughs again and pulls on my waist until I finally roll to my other side to face him. Not wanting him to see how upset I really am, I press my face into his t-shirt.

“Cassie,” he says, trying to pull back so he can see my face. I merely grip his shirt harder. “Hey, come on. Cassandra. It won’t be that bad.”

I drop my head onto the pillow and bring up my hand to wipe my eyes. “It will because I’ve only ever been in LA when you’re here. I don’t know how to live here without you.”

His thumb catches a tear as it falls from my eye. “I promise you it’s going to be fine. You know people here now and it’s not like we’re not going to see each other at all during the three months. I’ll have breaks and come back here and you’ll have times when you can come down there and see me.”

I blink a couple times, trying to get the tears off my eyelashes, and focus my eyes on him. He looks so concerned and I feel bad that he has to feel that way instead of being happy for the movie part.

“I’m sorry,” I finally say with a sigh.

“Stop apologizing,” he replies and leans forward to kiss me. My body relaxes at his slow kiss and I return it, sinking further into his arms. “It really is going to be okay,” he mumbles against my lips.

I close my eyes when he rests his forehead against mine. I wish we could just stay like this forever. That there would never be a time when I wouldn’t be able to see him whenever I wanted to. I don’t even want to think about how lonely I’m going to be while he’s away.

“Can you take a week off work sometime soon?”

I open my eyes to find him staring at me. “When?”

“A week from Sunday.”

“Why?”

“I want to go somewhere with you before I have to leave for Hawaii. I was thinking we should go to St. Thomas. Have you ever been there?”

“No,” I say softly.

“Do you want to do that? We could rent a bungalow right on the beach and just lay by the water all day.”

He makes it sound so good that I can’t help but nod and smile.

“Think you can break away from the store for a week?”

It’s probably one of the last things I should do since I have so much extra to do with the two new New York buyers we have. But I’ve been working hard for the past five months and if I’m going to be without Justin for an entire three months, I want to spend some real quality time with him before he goes.

“I’ll find a way.”

He smiles and pulls me tight against him. “Good. I’ll book the tickets tonight.”

I nod and tuck my head into his neck, breathing in deeply. He leaves for Hawaii in three weeks and I want to memorize every little thing about him so I have at least something while he’s gone.

The smell of his cologne is completely soothing and that combined with his body against mine is lulling me to sleep. Justin’s breathing is light so I know he’s still awake but he doesn’t make any move to get out of bed. In fact, neither of move at all until the ringing of my phone cuts through the otherwise silence.

I groan softly at the interruption and push my face tighter into his neck.

“Want me to get it?” Justin asks after the second ring.

I sigh but nod. It could be something important.

His one arm leaves from around me and he shifts a bit so he can grab my cordless phone sitting on my bedside table. I keep my eyes close and listen to his side of the conversation.

“Hello?...No, she’s sleeping right now. Can I take a message?”

I smile a bit. I was hoping he would make up an excuse for me not to have to talk on the phone.

“Jordan?”

My eyes snap open at the name. Shit. Why was he calling? Mom must have given him my number because I sure as hell wouldn’t be stupid enough to give it out to him or Greg.

“Sure, I’ll tell her you-” He stops for a second. “Uh, Justin…Yeah.”

I close my eyes again and stifle a groan. Please let Jordan have some sense of grace and not say anything crude or disrespectful to Justin.

“Uh huh.” He utters a dry laugh. “Sure…Yeah, bye.” He clicks the phone off and then clears his throat. “So Jordan called.”

I can’t help but laugh slightly at his obvious statement. “We should have just let it ring.”

“Mm.”

I lift up my head so I can see him. I might need to damage control. “What did he say to you?”

He yawns and rolls onto his back, his arm pulling away from my body. “Nothing much. He wants you to call him. Said something about needing to borrow some money and how you have a lot.”

I groan and bring up my hand to rub my eyes. “Of course.”

“What’s the deal with him and Greg? You hardly ever mention them.”

I sigh. “Jordan’s a year older than me and Greg’s two years younger. They lived with Grant’s ex wife so I didn’t see them a lot when I was growing up. They’re both just…” I trail off as I try to find the right word. “Incredible mooches.”

“Do they work?”

“They both just dick around. Greg’s a professional student and Grant’s gladly paying the way for that. He still lives with his mom and doesn’t pay for a thing. Jordan doesn’t do anything really. He says he’s writing a novel but he’s been saying that for years.”

“And he has no money so he always tries to get you to give him some?”

“He has money. Grant has a trust fund set up for him and he gets a specific amount each month but he blows all the money right at the beginning of the month and then mooches off other people.” I stretch my arms above my body. “He calls every couple months when he’s got no one else. I made a point not to give him my new number but I guess my mom or Grant gave it to him.”

“Are you going to call him back?”

I breathe in deeply. “Not today. I don’t have the patience to deal with him right now.”

“Besides, you’re spending the day with me.”

My lips begin to curve up and I raise my eyebrows. “Oh I am, am I?”

He grins and moves to cover my body with his. “Uh huh. I have it all planned.”

I pull my arms from in between our bodies to run my hands up his back. “And what would those plans be?”

He reaches down and pulls up the blankets around us. “How about I just show you.”

It takes a lot of doing, but I manage to break away from all the movie crew and other actors and get some privacy in my trailer. I’ve been trying to do this since five this morning and it took four hours to do it. It’s always when you need time alone the most when you can’t seem to find it.

But I’m alone now and after grabbing a bottle of water from my mini fridge, I get myself comfortable on the couch and pull out my cell phone. I better not get disturbed in the next few minutes.

The phone is on its third ring and I’m thinking that I’m going to have to leave a voicemail when a groggy voice finally picks up.

“Hello?”

I smile at the sound of her voice. “Hey. Did I wake you up?”

“Yeah.” I can hear her yawn. “I guess I should get up anyways.”

“Happy birthday.”

There’s a pause and then a sigh. “Thanks.”

My shoulders drop a bit. I hate that I’m in Hawaii for her birthday. I tried so hard to get the day off so I could fly back to LA and surprise her but there was no way. Probably any other day but today would have worked. “You have no idea how much I wish I was in LA with you today. I’m so sorry I can’t be there.”

“It’s okay,” she replies like she has the past ten times I’ve apologized for this. But this time she sounds completely miserable and I feel even worse. “It’s just another day.”

“It’s your birthday,” I argue. “It’s a special day and it sucks that I couldn’t be up there for it. I’ll make it up to you.”

“I know.” She sighs again and I can hear the sound of her getting up. “How’s Hawaii?”

“Same as usual. Hot.” I pick up a pillow on the couch and turn it around in my hands. “Too bad you aren’t here.”

“Even if I was you’d be so busy I wouldn’t even see you.”

She’s right but that still doesn’t make me not want her here. Just knowing she’s nearby would make this better. “I still want you here. I don’t want to wait two weeks for you to come here.”

She doesn’t say anything and I realize that my words probably aren’t helping the situation any. I change the subject.

“So what are your plans for tonight? You’re going out, right?”

“Kyle, Molly, and Ryan are taking me out later. None of them would tell me where though.”

Now I really wish I was with her. I thought if anything Elodie, Chris, and Emma would be the people she was spending the day with, not Kyle and his friends. That’s enough to put me in a bad mood.

I know I should be happy that Cassie’s made some friends in LA but I really wish Kyle wasn’t one of them. With each passing day, I’m coming to dislike him more and more. Especially since I’ve been gone. Whenever I call the store for Cassie, he always picks up and half the time she’s mysteriously on another line or has just stepped out. I don’t believe that shit for a second. He’s got a thing for my girl and it’s really beginning to piss me off.

Not wanting to get in an argument about my feelings on Kyle on her birthday, I don’t respond how I want to and instead take out any frustration on the pillow in my hand by throwing it across the trailer.

“Are you going to work today?” I ask as I watch the pillow bounce off the wall and land on the floor.

“I might as well. I don’t want to just sit around here all day.”

“There should be a surprise waiting for you there.”

Her voice lightens. “Really? What?”

I smile and tilt my head up to look at the ceiling. “You’ll just have to wait and see.”

“Is it something I’ll like?”

I can’t help but laugh at her. “Why would I get you something you didn’t like?”

“Shut up. Stop laughing at me. It was just a question.”

I manage to stop laughing but can’t keep the smile off my face. “I’m just teasing you.”

“It’s really not nice to tease someone on their birthday.”

I smile and shift on the couch so I’m stretched out across it so I can stare at the ceiling. I close my eyes as both Cassie and I fall silent. I love that we’re at that point where neither of needs to say anything, even on the phone, and it’s not uncomfortable. She doesn’t have to say anything at this point. Just knowing that she’s on the other line is enough for me.

I miss her so damn much. I flew back to LA last week for a couple days but I had to do some last minute stuff with Bridget’s album so I didn’t get to spend as much time as I wanted with Cassie. And the next time I’m going to see her is in two weeks when she comes down here for three days. I know two weeks really isn’t that long in the grand scheme of things but right now it feels like years.

“What are you doing right now?”

Cassie’s question causes me to open my eyes. “Laying in my trailer. Wondering how long I can go before they find me.”

“Are you shooting all day?”

“Yeah. We already did a scene this morning.” I turn my head to the side and stare at the wall across from me. “What are you doing right now?”

“Sitting on the balcony.”

Her words cause some homesickness to tear at me. I love the balcony attached to her bedroom. Some of my best mornings lately have been spent on that balcony with her. She has a thing for watching the sun rise and she’s pulled me from bed a couple times to watch it with her. I always complain about how early it is but really, I wouldn’t trade those moments for anything.

“I wish I was there with you.”

Her words are soft. “Me too.”

I fall silent as I try and rearrange my schedule in my mind so I can somehow manage to get back to LA, even if it’s just for a day. Before I can get too far there’s a knock on the trailer door and then it opens.

“Justin.”

I look over and see Rachel poking her head in. “What?” I ask, pulling the phone piece from my mouth

“They need you.”

I sigh and raise the phone back to my mouth. “I have to-”

“I heard,” Cassie interrupts. “I should get ready to go to the store anyways.”

“I’ll call you later today, okay?”

“Okay.”

“I love you.”

“I love you too.”

I have to force myself to hang up and I reach up my hands to rub my forehead before pulling myself up into a sitting position.

This is going to be a long day.

* * *

“Cassandra, you have a call.”

I raise my eyes to Kyle without lifting my chin from where it’s resting in my palm. “Can you take a message?”

He gives me a once over and then nods. “Sure.”

Once I’m alone again in my office, my eyes fall back to the bouquet of roses that arrived at the store this morning. I reach out my hand and pick up the note that came with the flowers. I read the words over again and shut my eyes. I don’t think I’ve ever been this depressed on my birthday.

Kyle’s voice suddenly cuts into the quiet. “It’s your sister. She’s pretty persistent and says you need to pick up the phone.”

A sigh escapes me. “Okay. Thanks.”

He disappears again and I force myself to grab the phone.

“Hello?”

“Happy birthday, C!”

“Thanks.”

“You sound less than thrilled for today. I bet a visit from me and Emma would cheer you up.”

I can’t help but smile a bit at that. It’s hard to be in a bad mood when Emma’s around. Her smiles and giggles are completely infectious.

“You’re already on your way, aren’t you?”

“Five minutes away. See you then.”

I hang up the phone and force myself to get up from my chair. I’ve been camped out in my office for the past two hours and staring at the same four walls is slowly killing me. Having Elodie and Emma here will probably make things better.

“You emerged!” Kyle says when I walk into the showroom. “I thought I was going to have to drag you out of there at the end of the day.”

I can’t help the corners of my lips from curving up. “I emerged. Elodie and Emma are coming in.”

“Great! I love Emma.”

“She loves you too.” I look around the showroom. There’s no one in here right now but Kyle did sell a few dresses this morning. He’s done so much for the store. I couldn’t have hired a better store manager.

“So you’re still up for your birthday party tonight?”

I raise my eyebrows. “Party?”

“Celebration,” he corrects. “I don’t want to talk it up too much and then have it fall through.”

“I’ll take anything at this point,” I say. “Anything that’s going to take away from how crappy this day has potential for being.”

Kyle throws his arm around my shoulders in a half hug. “I’ll do my best to ensure that by the end of the night you forget that your boyfriend isn’t here.”

I give him a half smile. “Thanks.”

“There’s your gorgeous niece.”

I look towards the windows at the front of the store and see Elodie at the curb, pulling Emma from her carseat. Pulling away from Kyle, I start walking towards the door. By time I’m opening it, Elodie has Emma in her arms.

“Hey,” I say, stepping outside. “I can take her.”

Elodie smiles and passes me Emma. “Say happy birthday to Aunt Cassandra, Em.”

Emma giggles and a smile immediately comes to my face. I love this little girl so much.

“I got you some Starbucks,” Elodie says, appearing from her side of the car with two large cups of coffee. “I figured that would brighten your day a bit.”

“Kyle already got me some this morning but that was like…two hours ago so I’m sure I can take some more.”

Elodie laughs as I lead us into the store. “I figured as much.”

Kyle’s on the phone when we walk in but he smiles and waves to Emma on our way past him. She giggles and that makes me smile. She took to Kyle faster than anyone I know.

I leave Kyle in peace in the showroom and take Elodie and Emma back to my office. Emma’s perfectly content to stay on my lap and once I’m settled I gratefully take the cup of coffee from Elodie and take a sip.

“So I’m assuming from how you sounded on the phone that your birthday isn’t going the greatest,” Elodie says, sitting down in the chair across from me.

A frown settles on my lips and I put my coffee down. “It could definitely be better.”

“Because Justin’s not here?”

I nod but don’t say anything else. It’s been so hard with him and Rachel both being gone for the past month and I know if I talk too much about it I’m going to get choked up and that’s really the last thing I want to happen while I’m at work.

“It kind of just sucks,” I say softly after a minute of silence.

“It must. Have you talked to him today? I’m assuming those are from him.”

I glance at the roses she’s pointing at. “Yeah. They were there when I got here this morning.” I run my hand over the fine hair on top of Emma’s head. “He called this morning but I only got to talk to him for like ten minutes before he had to go back on set.”

“It’s too bad you couldn’t go out there. Hawaii alone would be enough of a birthday present.”

“Even if I went he still would have been just as busy and I would have been alone all day. He told me before that he’s up by four thirty and not be in bed until midnight.”

“Oh.” Elodie takes a sip of her coffee and her eyes move around my office before landing on me again. “When is your trip down there?”

“Two weeks from tomorrow. By then it’s going to seem like years since I last saw him.” Adjusting Emma on my lap, I reach up a hand to brush over my hair. “I guess I’ve been spoiled with him being around so much that I’m not used to seeing him every day. And he’s been away for a month now and I’m still not used to it.”

“How long is he down there?”

“He’s scheduled to be there two more months. But that’s if everything stays on schedule. And even after that he may have to go back and reshoot scenes.” I drink some more coffee and then balance the cup on my knee and rub my thumb over the lid. “I just keep thinking, today especially, how I don’t think I can do two more months of this.”

When I look up at my sister after a long moment of silence, I find her fighting a smile and immediately my eyes narrow.

“What?”

Her smile breaks through and she shakes her head. “I was just thinking how six months ago you would never have gotten this attached to a guy to the point that when he’s away for a few weeks you’re almost falling apart.”

“I’m not almost falling apart,” I say defensively.

“You have to admit you’re not exactly put together.”

I frown. “It’s my birthday and my boyfriend’s across the country. I don’t need to be put together today.”

Elodie lifts her hands in surrender. “I’m not saying you need to be.”

“Then what are you saying?”

She brings her coffee cup to her mouth and merely gives me a smile. “Simply that it’s a change. That’s all.”

“Coffee?”

I blink a few times and look away from the direction of the catering table to see Sasha standing beside me, a full cup of coffee in her hand. A smile spreads across my face as I take it from her.

“You’re amazing.”

She smiles and curtsies. “I really do try.”

“Seriously. I should replace Rachel with you.”

This time I get a laugh out of her. “Rachel would kill you if she heard you being such an ass. And Grace would never let you take me away from her. I’m the best personal assistant she’s ever had.”

I lift the coffee to my lips and take a sip before speaking. “Except when you’re getting stuff for me and leaving her to fend for herself?” I ask with a smile.

She rolls her eyes. “She’s in the middle of shooting a scene. She doesn’t need anything.”

I take another drink of my coffee and watch as Sasha sits in the directors chair beside me and crosses her legs. She taps her fingers on the armrest for a moment before looking over at me.

“You’re usually more restless than this,” she comments, giving me a once over. “You never just sit here while they shoot a scene. You’re always breathing down the director’s neck wanting to know what’s going on. What the deal?”

I let out a laugh at her words and shake my head. “I’m waiting for somebody.”

“Who?”

“My girlfriend,” I say. The words rolling off my tongue automatically bring a smile to my lips and I bring my cup up to my mouth to hide how excited I actually am before I look like a complete pansy.

“Cassandra Reyna, right?”

“Yeah.”

“She’s coming here?”

“Yeah.” I check my watch. “Rachel went to pick her up at the airport.”

“How long is she staying?”

“Four days.” I start to get excited when I see dark hair that looks like Cassie’s, but sink back into my chair when it’s only one of the extras. I’ve been up since five this morning and I’ve been waiting for her to get here since then. Now, at one in the afternoon, I feel like I’m going to die with anticipation of seeing her. It’s been a long three weeks since I last saw her. I talk on the phone to her almost every day but that doesn’t come close to actually seeing her.

“Did Russell give you some time off?”

I had had to plead with Russell, the director, to move some of my scenes around so I’d have a bit of free time while Cassie was here. Having here is going to be amazing but I don’t want to be shooting for fourteen hours of the day and not be able to spend a lot of time with her.

“Some. Enough.”

“Do you have more scenes to shoot today?”

“Just one later today,” I answer distractedly as I lift my body up a bit when I think I see Rachel walking from the parking lot. This time I’m right with what I see and a warm feeling goes through me when I make out Cassie walking beside her. I don’t get up right away, but instead watch them walk towards the movie set. Rachel is saying something but Cassie looks distracted as she looks around. That makes me smile because I know she’s looking for me.

Leaving my coffee on the armrest of my chair, I get up. “They’re here,” I say, just so Sasha doesn’t think I’m completely deserting her, and then begin to make my way towards them. Rachel gets stopped to talk to one of the makeup artists and Cassie’s standing unsurely beside her. She doesn’t see me when I come up to the side of her and I reach out to touch her hand. She turns quickly and a smile brightens up her entire face.

“Where did you come from?” she asks softly.

I don’t respond but instead pull her to me and give her a tight hug. She feels amazing and she smells amazing and she’s just…amazing. I’m so glad she’s here.

I pull away just far enough from her so I can lower my head to hers and kiss her waiting mouth. Her lips are softer than I remember them and I feel like I’m a starving man just given a feast.

I refrain from really kissing her the way I want to, mindful of all the people standing around us. Instead I force myself to pull away after a short moment.

“You taste like coffee,” Cassie says, her thumb wiping the corner of my mouth where I’m assuming her lipgloss transferred.

“I just had some.” I bring up both my hands to run over her hair. She smiles up at me and I can’t take us being in such a crowded area anymore. I drop my arms from her and twist my upper body to find Rachel. “Rach!”

She turns from the makeup artist. “Yeah?”

“Can you make sure no one bothers us for a couple hours?”

She rolls her eyes. “Sure.”

I turn back to Cassie. “Want to see my amazing trailer?”

She laughs. “Of course.”

Smiling, I grab her hand and pull her to my side as I lead her away from the set to the parking lot where the trailers are set up.

“It’s kind of ghetto,” I warn her as I let go of her hand to climb the stairs leading to my trailer. “Don’t judge.”

“I’ll try,” she laughs.

I step into the trailer and hold open the door for her. My eyes stay on her as she looks around.

“It’s not that bad,” she says after a moment. “Of course the wood paneling leaves something to be desired…”

I grab her sides and she shrieks out a laugh. “You said you wouldn’t judge.”

She turns around so she’s facing me. “I said I would try. But this trailer made it very hard.”

I move my hands down to curl around her hips and begin to walk her towards the back of the trailer where there’s a bed. “You’re gonna pay for that.”

She giggles and brings her hands up to rest on my upper arms. “You’re not as scary as you think you are.”

I merely raise an eyebrow and give her a little push when the back of her knees hit the mattress. She sits down and then moves into a laying position as I crawl over her.

“It’s so good to have you here,” I say as I look down at her. “It’s been so hard not seeing you.”

She wraps her arms around me and rubs her thumbs against the back of my neck. She lifts her head to kiss me softly and then pulls back and rests her head on the pillow. “I know,” she sighs. “I’ve been so bored.”

I lean down and kiss the corner of her jaw, inhaling as I do so. The smell of cherry blossoms immediately brings me back to a feeling of being at home and it suddenly doesn’t matter at all that we’re in my shitty movie trailer and will probably be disturbed within a couple hours. “What about Molly and that other girl?”

“Jaime. I spend time with them sometimes but I can’t spend every single night with them. I don’t want to be a third wheel.”

I pull my head back from hers and reach up my hands to push her hair away from her face, fanning it across her pillow. “I’m sure they don’t think of you as a third wheel.”

“But I can’t spend all my time with them. They don’t know me like you do.”

That makes me smile. I really do feel like over the past couple months I’ve really begun to get a really good grasp on who Cassie is as a person and everything she’s about. She’s opened up about so much that I never thought she willingly would. She’s told me about past relationships, and really, there wasn’t much to tell but I’m glad I know anyways. And she’s told me about some family stuff and it told me a lot about why she is the way she is. I guess after her father walked out on them, Isabelle was in a lot of relationships with different guys and as soon as Cassie began to depend on one, he’d be gone and there would be some new guy in his place. It wasn’t until Cassie was in tenth grade that Grant came into the picture and her mom actually settled down. Knowing that has made it a lot more patient with any commitment issues she has. She can’t help something that was basically ingrained in her head for ten years of her life.

“I guess they wouldn’t.” I move my hands from her hair to cup her cheeks and lower my head to hers. “I feel like I need to relearn certain parts of you though,” I say, my lips brushing against hers with each word.

Her eyes close and lips turn up. “I definitely think that’s an idea I would like to hear more about.”

I cover her lips with mine and kiss her for a minute before pulling back just enough to say, “Talking’s overrated,” and that’s the last of our conversation for a while.

* * *

“So you think this is the take you’re going to use?”

Russell nods and leans back in his director’s chair. “You and Grace nailed it in this one. I like it.”

“Awesome.” I take a glance towards my trailer and then clear my throat. “So…do you need me for anymore scenes tonight?”

Russell finally tears his eyes away from the camera and looks over to study me. After a second he smiles and shakes his head. “Go find your girlfriend.”

Smiling, I give him a pat on the back and then turn in the direction of my trailer. When I left her, Cassie had been sleeping. But that was a couple hours ago so she very well may be up and just waiting in there for me. I made a reservation at a restaurant in the city for us so I hope she’s not too jetlagged to go and enjoy it.

It’s silent in the trailer when I step inside and I walk through it as quietly as I can. Cassie’s still curled up in bed asleep and she looks too peaceful to disturb so I leave her there. We have a couple hours until we have to be at the restaurant and as long as I have time to go to the hotel and shower before we go to eat, I’ll be fine.

I’ve just grabbed a bottle of water from my mini fridge when I hear Cassie’s phone ring. I can see it lighting up in her purse and I reach down to grab it, not wanting the noise to wake her up. My eyes take in the name flashing across the screen before I press the talk button.

“Hello.”

There’s a short pause before Kyle speaks. “Is Cassandra there?”

“She’s busy,” I say, not willing to offer any other information other than that.

“Oh. Alright, can you get her to give me a call when she’s not busy?”

Some annoyance goes through me and I glance back towards where Cassie’s sleeping. “Is this about work?”

There’s another pause and basically gives me my answer. “Yeah. I guess it is.”

“She’s here on vacation for the next four days. When she’s back in LA you can talk work with her then.”

“Will you tell her I called?”

He sounds like he’s getting irritated and a small amount of juvenile satisfaction goes through me. “She’ll get back to you when she’s in LA,” is all I say and then I hang up the phone. I almost expect him to call again but her phone remains silent and after a minute, I put it back in her purse.

Ever since that day right after my surgery when I got irritated with Kyle and Cassie’s relationship, I haven’t been able to get off it. Every time she mentions him or I see him the irritation just grows. I know it pisses her off that I’m feeling like this so I try to not bring it up with her but it’s definitely bothering me. Soon I know I won’t be able to hide it but for now, I’d like to avoid any drama if possible. Especially this weekend when she’s only here for a few days.

I can’t help but have those feelings of irritation linger in me though. The more time goes on, the more things about Kyle are really starting to get to me. I hate how he knows all these little things about her that I thought only I knew. I hate how he sometimes calls her by her middle name, Leigh, as some kind of inside joke that I’m not a part of. I hate how he picks up the phone whenever I call the store and how half the time I go in there they’re together and laughing about some random thing.

Kyle needs to get it through his head quick that Cassie is not available and a very clear line of professionalism needs to be drawn. If he can’t figure that out for himself, I have no problem helping him do so.

Thinking so much about Kyle is beginning to put me in a pretty bad mood so I force myself to push all thoughts of him from my head and instead concentrate on what is right here in front of me. I can worry about him another time.

Cassie’s still asleep when I go back over to the bed and I sit down on the edge of it and I lightly run my finger up her arm. She shifts a bit but it isn’t until I lean down and press my lips to her shoulder that she moans a bit and her eyes flutter open. She blinks a few times before focusing on me.

“Have you already shot the scene?” she asks through a yawn.

I nod and kiss her temple. “Mm hmm. Just finished.”

“Does that mean you’re done for the day?”

“It does.”

A smile stretches across her face and she pulls her arms out from under the sheet to wrap around my neck. I let her pull me down to rest my upper body on hers. “Good,” she says and then presses her lips against mine. “So I get you for the rest of the night? No more work?”

“No more work,” I repeat and then smile. “Normally I’m the one who’s saying that to you.”

“Not this weekend,” she says, kissing the corner of my mouth. “I’m not doing any work at all this weekend. I didn’t even bring my sketchbook with me.”

I chuckle. “You know within a day or two you’re going to have sketches drawn on scraps of paper and paper towel.”

She smiles and shakes her head. “I’ll keep it to a minimum. Only when you’re shooting.”

I rest my arms on either side of her head and stare down at her. “Because the rest of the time is just for us.”

One hand moves to the back of my head and she pulls me down to her mouth again. “Agreed,” she mumbles before our lips meet.

And with that, I decide not to tell her that Kyle called. It’s work related and we just agreed that that’s not what this weekends about. Too bad for him, I guess.

“For goodness sakes,” I mumble under my breath, leaning back against the door of the store after shutting it, blocking out the flashes of paparazzi cameras. “This is ridiculous.”

“Damn, they’re really interested in you today, huh?”

I open my eyes to see Kyle standing there. “Very much so.”

“Welcome back,” he says with a smile, coming over to give me a quick hug. “How was Hawaii?”

Just the mention of it makes me sad to be back in LA. “Amazing. It was so nice there,” I say, handing him the large cup of Starbucks coffee I had picked up for him on my way in.

“You look a little pink,” he comments, touching my forearm.

I look down at my skin, which isn’t it’s normal pale self. “I know. I forgot to wear sunscreen on my last day there.”

“Did you spend a lot of time outside?” Kyle asks as we walk through the store towards my office.

“When Justin was shooting there wasn’t much for me to do so I just sat outside and read.” I set my own coffee down on my desk along with my bag.

“You didn’t watch them shoot the scenes?” he asks, leaning his shoulder against the doorframe. “You had a sneak peak at a big movie.”

“I thought I would be really interested in watching it but after you watch them shoot the same scene fives times it kind of loses it’s magic.” I lean over my desk to start up my laptop. “So I caught up on my reading instead.”

“Read anything good?”

“I read that book you recommended the other day. It was great.”

“I thought you’d like it.”

My computer loads up and I log onto my email account. “So anything exciting happen here while I was gone?”

With his head he motions to the corner of the office and I see a package sitting there. “What’s that?”

“Open it.”

I go over and pull it open. A large smile spreads over my lips when I see the fabric I had specially ordered from Paris sitting inside. “Finally,” I say, fingering the soft material. “I’ve been waiting forever for this.”

“It came on Friday afternoon. That’s why I called you.”

I glance up from the fabric. “You called me? When?”

“Friday afternoon. Justin picked up.”

“Oh. He never said anything.”

Kyle’s silent for a moment before raising an eyebrow. “I don’t think he was very happy that I called you.”

“What did he say?” I ask, hoping he wasn’t a complete jerk.

“Basically that you were on vacation and anything work related should wait until you were back in LA.”

I shut my eyes briefly and sigh. “I’m going to apologize on behalf of him.”

Kyle shrugs. “It doesn’t matter.”

I shake my head. It does matter. If Susan had called me, Justin would have told me. It’s simply because it was Kyle that I didn’t get the message. This is ridiculous. “It does matter,” I reply finally, putting the fabric back in its package to deal with later. “I’m guessing he wasn’t exactly pleasant to you, right?”

He merely raises his eyebrows, which answers my question. “It’s not like it was really important for you to know the fabric came.”

“That’s not the point,” I say, bringing up a hand to run through my hair. “You weren’t doing anything wrong by calling me.”

“That’s what I thought,” he says and then shrugs. “Whatever though. It’s no big deal.” His eyes flicker around the office. “Nothing else too important happened though. Susan called but said she’d email you.”

I glance at my computer screen and see an email from her in my inbox. “Probably about fashion week.”

“Already?”

“I was going to show her a couple ideas I have. And she wanted to talk about revamping the website.”

“You know, I was going to suggest that. The site is a bit dull. No offense.”

“None taken. I know it’s not the most stimulating website ever.”

“I’ve taken some web design classes. I could fool around with it a bit.”

I perk up a bit at that. “Really?”

“Sure. I’ll look at it tonight.”

“That would be awesome.”

Kyle glances over his shoulder towards the showroom. “Someone just came in. I’ll talk to you in a bit.”

I nod. “Sure.” I wait for him to leave and then go and shut my office door. Sitting down at my desk, I stare at my computer screen but make no move to click on the waiting emails. The conversation with Kyle is still going through my head and I’m getting a little pissed off as I think about the fact that I never got the message that Kyle had phoned. Justin’s whole jealousy thing needs to stop now. I had hoped he would just get over it but clearly he isn’t. Every once in a while he’ll say slightly passive aggressive things when I mention Kyle, which is irritating but tolerable up until this point. From how Kyle acted, I know that Justin was rude to him when he called. And then for him not to tell me he called? That has to stop.

I pull my cell phone from my bag and text Justin to call me when he has a chance, not wanting to call if they’re in the middle of shooting a scene. Apparently he’s not busy because less than a minute after I send the text, my phone is ringing.

“Hello.”

“Hey,” he answers, sounding completely relaxed. “What are you up to?”

“I just got into the store.”

“It’s like eleven LA time, isn’t it? You’re there late.”

“I’m still a bit jetlagged,” I reply and then get right to the point, not interested in any small talk. “So when I got here I was talking to Kyle and he mentioned he called while I was down in Hawaii.”

There’s a pause that lasts longer than it should. “Oh, right,” Justin finally says. “I forgot to tell you.”

He couldn’t have said worse words. “You’re full of bullshit.”

“Excuse me?” He sounds shocked and sends some satisfaction through me.

“From what I heard it sounds like it wasn’t just some quick ‘I’ll give her the message’. You said that I shouldn’t be getting work related calls because I was on vacation.”

“Well that’s true.”

“So if Susan had called, would I have gotten the message then?”

He utters a laugh, which only serves to piss me off further. “It didn’t matter who called. I forgot to give you the message. What’s the big deal?”

“You didn’t forget to give me the message,” I reply, my fingers tapping on the top of my desk. “And I know that if it had been Susan you wouldn’t have told her to not call me while I was on vacation. And you wouldn’t have ‘forgot’ to give me the message. You intentionally didn’t tell me Kyle called because you hate him.”

The voices that were in the background fade and I figure he’s moved to a more private area. “Wow, according to you I got a lot of ulterior motives, huh?”

His voice is carrying a bit of sarcasm and I can feel my face heating up as I get more upset. “Well you do, don’t you?” I challenge him, pushing my chair back and standing. “You hate Kyle for some unknown reason and instead of just dealing with it, you’re rude to him and try and make him as uncomfortable as possible.”

“Forgive me, Cassie, for not being overjoyed that you’re best friends with a guy who, regardless of the fact that you already have a boyfriend, has feelings for you.”

I scoff at that ridiculous statement but before I can say anything, he continues.

“You and him are way closer than a business relationship should be and yeah, that pisses me off because you end up spending more time with him than you do with me.”

“You’re not even here,” I cut in before he can say anything else. “Of course I’m spending more time with him.”

“Do you really think I had any say in where the movie was being shot?” A door is slammed and I assume he is now in his trailer, which is probably for the best because now he’s getting upset and raising his voice and I don’t want the entire movie set to hear all this. “Would you rather me just screw my career so I’m in LA?”

“I didn’t say that,” I quickly say, forcing myself to calm down a bit. He’s getting himself worked up and I don’t want to do the same. I walk over to a painting I have on the wall and stare at it. “What I said is that you aren’t here so of course I’m spending more time with Kyle. And I’m sorry if it bothers you so much that we’re friends but I’m we work together every single day and that’s just how it is. If you trust me at all, it really shouldn’t be a problem for you.”

He groans. “Don’t pull out the whole trust thing, Cassie. You know I trust you. I don’t trust him. You don’t see the way he looks at you.”

“You haven’t ever taken the time to even slightly get to know him. You have no reason to hate him.”

“I have every reason to hate a guy who is going after my girlfriend!”

“You’re joking, right?” I ask incredulously. “You’re not around him enough to have the right to say something like that.”

“I can say whatever I want,” he shoots back.

I shut my eyes and don’t say anything. Fighting over the phone is one of my least favorite things to do. And fighting with someone as stubborn as Justin over the phone? It’s completely pointless. “Please just stop yelling,” I finally say softly.

I can hear him take a few deep breaths and when he speaks again, his voice is somewhat calmer. “It’s never going to get to the point where I like Kyle, Cassie, or want to hang out with him. That’s just how it is and that’s how it’s going to be.”

I sit back down in my chair and drop my head into my hand. “I’m not asking you to be friends with him. I’m asking you to respect him as much as you respect me.”

“I can’t do that.”

“Justin…”

“What? Do you want me to lie and say I will? Because that’s what it’s going to be-a lie.”

I don’t say anything. Sometimes he makes it impossible to reason with him. I can only sit there silently and shake my head.

“Look,” Justin finally says. “I don’t want to argue about this, okay? I’m sorry I forgot to give you the message but that’s what happened-I forgot. I really don’t have all this malicious intent in me that you seem to think I have.”

“I don’t think you have malicious intent,” I say with a sigh. I really hate fighting with him and he’s so stubborn that I’m just running around in circles with this. This can just be dealt with at a later date. I can’t deal with this right now. “You forgot?”

“I forgot,” he repeats. “Next time I promise I’ll write it down. Better yet, next time I just won’t answer your phone, okay?”

I have a feeling that’s as good as I’m going to get so I’ll take it. “Okay.”

“So is this all okay? Are you still pissed off?”

I take a deep breath and shake my head even though he can’t see it. “No.”

“Good. Hey, I’ve got to get to set. They keep calling for me.”

“Oh. Sorry.”

“No, it’s cool. They can wait a couple minutes. But we’re okay?”

“Yeah.”

“Okay. I’ll you later once I’m done. Will you keep your cell phone on?”

I hate having my cell phone on when I’m working but I don’t want Justin calling the store and Kyle picking up. “Yeah.”

“Alright. I’ll talk to you later.”

“Okay.”

He hangs up with that and I drop my phone onto my desk and let out a large sigh. At least now I know he wasn’t intentionally not telling me Kyle called. But even with all he said, I just have this feeling like there was something really really wrong with what just went on.

* * *

“So would you like us to have a nice glass of warm milk sent up to your room? Or maybe some extra blankets so you don’t catch a chill?”

I roll my eyes as Grace begins to laugh at Sasha’s words. “You guys are hilarious. Really.”

Sasha giggles and snakes her arm around my side, squeezing me until my ribs begin to ache. “We try to tame it down around you. We don’t want you to get too excited and have a stroke or anything.”

I simply shake my head and fish through my pocket for my room key. Filming for the past two and a half months has really been catching up to me lately and this is the fourth night in a row that I’ve wanted to go to bed earlier. That prompted Sasha to develop a theory that I’m aging at a rapid pace and I’m actually close to eighty years old. The old man jokes haven’t stopped since we sat down for dinner at the hotel restaurant. But really, it’s almost ten o’clock and I have to be on set by five tomorrow morning. It’s not that unreasonable to want to go to bed, is it?

We reach the elevators and I push the up button. “Well ladies, as fun as it’s been to put up with your abuse for the past three hours, I’m going up to my room.”

“You’re really sure you don’t want to come out with us?” Grace asks. “You do realize that you only get thirteen more days with our lovely presence before the filming wraps up.”

The elevator dings and the doors open. “Seems like an eternity,” I reply, laughing when Sasha flips me off. I step into the elevator and hit the button for my floor. “See you guys tomorrow.”

“Don’t forget to take your arthritis medicine!” Grace calls to me and I would respond but the doors close before I can.

The silence of the elevator is actually a nice break. I’ve been around people all day and the constant noise was about to make me go crazy. I can’t wait to get to my room, change into some sweats, and call Cassie.

My plans for the remainder of the evening immediately take a turn when I open the door to my hotel room. For a second I think I’m dreaming but when I blink and still see Cassie standing at the door to the balcony with her back to me, a smile spreads across my face. What the hell is she doing in Hawaii?

“Cass,” I say happily, letting the door shut behind me. “What are you doing here?”

She doesn’t say anything at first and I’m crossing the room to her when she turns around. My smile falters a bit at the look on her face.

“Where were you?” she asks, her voice soft.

I reach her and draw her into a tight hug. It’s been two weeks since I flew back to LA to see her and I didn’t think I would be seeing her again before filming was wrapped. This is an amazing surprise.

“I was out with some people for dinner,” I reply, not missing that she didn’t return my hug but instead kept her arms wrapped around her stomach. “How long have you been here?”

“Since five. When I talked to you last night you said you were coming back to your hotel right after filming today.”

She’s right here in front of me and yet she seems a million miles away. “I was going to but then some of us went for dinner instead.” If only I had known she had planned a surprise visit and was up here just waiting for me. I wouldn’t have wasted the past five hours with people I see every day.

“I tried calling you but it kept going to voice mail.”

I’m becoming more and more anxious as I see moisture developing in her eyes. Her voice is almost down to a whisper now and she hasn’t even smiled at me yet. “My phone’s completely dead,” I say, rubbing my hands up and down her arms, trying to get something from her. Anything. “I’m sorry you’ve just been waiting up here all by yourself.” I lean down to hug her again, needing the contact. “I can’t believe you’re here.”

She’s still in my arms for a moment before she speaks, her voice cracking this time. “You smell like perfume.”

I pull back abruptly so I can see her face. A tear has fallen down her cheek and it looks like it will soon be joined by others. “I was hanging with Sasha and Grace,” I say, anxiety going through me. She can’t possibly think that I was with another girl like that.

Cassie says nothing but her chin trembles a bit and her shoulders drop.

I cup her face in my hands and bring it up so she’s looking at me. “Cassie, I swear. We were just all at dinner together. I would never do that to you.”

Some more tears fall. “I know that.”

I wipe my thumbs under her eyes, drying her skin. “Why are you crying then?”

She brings her hands up to run through her hair, her arms bumping mine out of the way. “I’ve just been waiting here for five hours not knowing where you were. I’ve had this trip planned for weeks and it’s just ruined.” She rolls her shoulder slightly. “And this stupid lace has been scratching me the entire time.”

My eyes slide down her body. One of the first things I noticed when I first walked into the room was what she was wearing but it hadn’t seemed appropriate to comment on it at the time. But I’m pretty sure there’s a present waiting for me under the short silk robe she has on. I move my hand to her shoulder and start to push her robe to the side.

“What have you got on under there?”

She pushes my hand away and crosses her arms over her chest. Okay, so we won’t be doing any of that right now. “Stop it, Justin.”

My hand falls back to my side and I stare at her silently. “You’re mad at me,” I finally state, feeling a sight build up in me.

She looks to the side. “No, I’m not.”

I watch in dismay as her tears start again and she draws in a shaky breath. “Cass, what’s wrong?” I ask softly. “We’re here together. Why are you crying?”

Her tears really start at that point and when she goes to draw in a deep breath, a small sob escapes her. Not caring if she wants me to touch her or not at this point, I draw her into a hug, cradling her head against my chest.

“Cassie,” I whisper into her hair. “Baby, what is it?”

She chokes in a breath and shakes her head against my chest. The only sounds in the room for a while are her crying and I don’t know what to do. At seven and a half months, I’ve seen her cry but never really cry like this. I don’t know what to do or say to comfort her so I simply keep her tightly against me and stroke my fingers through her hair.

A few minutes pass before Cassie finally says something but her words are muffled and I pull my upper body back a bit so I can see her face.

“What?”

She brings her hands up to wipe her face. “I hate this. I can’t just be away from you constantly and only see you for a day or two every few weeks. I miss you too much.”

I lean down and give her a slow kiss. When I pull back, I rest my forehead against hers. “I know. I miss you so much too. But you’re here now.”

“But only until tomorrow night. And then I don’t get to see you again.”

“It’s only for two more weeks,” I say, desperate to make her feel better. I hate how upset she is. “And then I’m back in LA for good and we’ll get to see each other every single day.”

She takes a deep breath and nods slightly. “I know.”

I kiss her again. “We only have to make it through two more weeks and then everything will be back to normal. I promise.” I run my hands up and down her back. “Okay?”

She nods again and I’m relieved to see that her tears have ceased. “Okay.”

I kiss her nose and then forehead. “How about you take a bath? You’ll love the tub. It’s huge.”

“I know. I saw it.”

I drop my arms from around her and pick up her hand instead, pulling her toward the bathroom. “You might only be here for a night but we’ll make the best of it, okay?”

We reach the bathroom and I lean down to put the plug in the drain and start the water. When I straighten, Cassie surprises me with her hands suddenly pushing my t-shirt up my torso. I laugh slightly.

“What are you doing?” I ask, lifting up my arms so she can pull off my shirt.

She gives the first smile I’ve seen yet. “You’re going to join me, right?”

My own smile curves up my lips. Things are starting to look up. “I’d love to.”

“So your flight gets in at four thirty tomorrow,” I say, balancing the phone between my ear and shoulder as I arrange cutlery around the plates on the dining room table.

“Four thirty,” Hannah confirms. “Am I expecting you to be there to pick me up?”

I take a step back from the table and examine it critically. “Yeah,” I reply, moving the vase of roses a bit to the left. “Then I thought we’d swing by the store, get Cassie and go for dinner.”

“She’s going to love you for this. She was going on and on the other day about how I’m too busy and she’s going to have to come all the way back to Seattle to see me.”

I smile and look around the room, trying to figure out where exactly Cassie keeps matches. “She’s been saying that to me too.” I open the top drawer of the desk in the corner of the room and smile when I see a box of matches. “I think she’s been getting homesick.”

“She’s just Hannah sick. It happens to everyone.”

I laugh. I’ve been talking to Hannah more lately since we’ve been planning this surprise trip for her to LA to visit Cassie and she’s really growing on me. She’s funny and snappy and never without a comeback and I like that. And she’s easy to talk to. I’ve only really been talking to her on the phone for the past couple weeks but I feel like I can trust her with anything. And that’s what makes me ask my next question.

“When you talked to her last did she seem a bit weird?”

There’s a slight pause. “Weird how?”

“She’s seemed stressed out lately.”

“She’s starting to get ready for Fashion Week. You should have seen how stressed out she got last year.”

“I don’t think it’s work stress.”

There’s another pause, this time longer. “Well…I think she might be really feeling out of her element.”

That’s not what I was expecting to hear. “Out of her element how?”

“She’s…she’s new at this whole long term relationship thing and she feels like she’s having to practice on you and she doesn’t want to mess up.”

My eyebrows rise. “Are you serious?”

“Maybe you shouldn’t tell her I said that.”

“But…really?” I can’t even find anything to say.

“She’s never been in a relationship that’s lasted longer than five months and I think sometimes she gets overwhelmed by some of the things that come with being in a long term relationship.”

“Like what?”

“She mentioned that you asked her how many kids she wanted.”

That had been an awkward conversation. I hadn’t thought anything about it when I had asked her that question last week but her face had gone white and she had seemed entirely uncomfortable discussing something like that. “It’s the commitment thing, isn’t it?”

“It’s always that, Justin. She’s really trying to not let it be an issue but it’s always there. It underlines everything.”

“I know that.”

“Maybe just try to be careful with some of the stuff you ask her. When you ask her how many kids she wants, she gets to a place where she feels overwhelmed like you’re proposing marriage or something.”

“I’m not proposing but…I mean, come on. It’s been eight months and I’d like to think we’re pretty serious. I don’t think it’s that bad that I ask her stuff like that.”

“I’m just saying you need to be careful with how you ask those things because she overreacts to stuff like that.”

I take look around the dining room and pray that what I’ve planned for tonight isn’t going to make her overreact. “I guess.”

“Look, don’t tell her we talked about this. She wouldn’t appreciate that.”

“I know. I won’t say anything.” I turn my head towards the front window when I hear a car door slam. “She’s here. I have to go.”

“Okay. See you tomorrow. Don’t forget about me.”

I smile. “I’d never hear the end of it if I did,” I say before hanging up the phone and quickly moving to the front door. I run my hands over my dress pants before opening the door. Cassie’s surprised eyes meet mine and her hand that was holding her keys drops.

“I thought you were coming by later to pick me up,” she says, her bag sliding from her shoulder.

I give her a long kiss. “That was just to throw you off my actual plans,” I say. I pull her into the house, careful to not let her look in the direction of the dining room. “Go to the spare bedroom down there and change into the dress on the bed.”

She gives me a suspicious look but moves in the direction of the room. “I’m not a huge fan of surprises, Justin,” she calls over her shoulder.

I smile at her. “I know,” I reply, watching her retreat down the hallway. Once the door closes behind her, I go to the kitchen just to make sure all the food is okay. I can’t cook to save my life but I at least made the effort to put the ordered Thai food into actual dishes.

I take the food out of the oven where I was keeping it warm and set it on the dining room table. Everything looks completely perfect but after my conversation with Hannah I’m not so sure about the situation anymore. Since I was in Hawaii for our six month anniversary, we decided to celebrate it tonight, two months late. I had put a lot of effort into having a fancy dinner and buying a present and I just hope it’s not going to overwhelm her.

I hear a door open and go back to see Cassie coming out of the spare room. A smile comes over my face when I see her. It’s a little intimidating buying clothes for a fashion designer but I think I did a pretty good job with the blue strapless dress. She looked absolutely gorgeous in it.

“You look amazing,” I say, running my hands down her sides. “It fits okay?”

“It does. It’s a really nice dress.” She narrows her eyes at me slightly. “Did Rachel buy this?”

I grab her hand and spin her around once. “I’m proud to say that I picked this out all by myself.”

“Wow, impressive,” she says, going up on her toes to kiss my cheek. “So where are you taking me in this fancy dress?”

“No where too far.” I weave my fingers through hers and pull her along with me to the dining room. When we reach the doorway, I move behind her and put my hand over her eyes. “Are you ready for your socks to be knocked off?”

“I’m always ready for that when I’m with you,” she quips back and I laugh. I move us into the dining room and then pull my hand away from her eyes. Standing behind her, I can’t see her reaction but all my previous fears that it would be too much were tossed to the side when she turned around and wrapped her arms around me in a hug.

“This is so much better than going to a restaurant,” she says, leaning up to kiss me. “Did you think this up all by yourself?”

I circle my arms around her and kiss her nose. “Right down to the candles.”

“It’s perfect,” she breathes out, turning her head around to look at the table again. She looks back at me. “Thai food?”

“Your favorite.”

“Did you make it?”

“Would you believe me if I said yes?”

She laughs and squeezes her arms around me. “Probably not. It’s all so perfect though.”

“Just wait until you see what I have for dessert.”

“Good thing I haven’t eaten since eleven.”

I run my hands down to rest on her hips. “Not good. You’ll waste away to nothing.”

She rolls her eyes and starts to respond but I silence her with a kiss.

“Let’s eat before the food gets cold,” I say when I pull back. She nods and I let go of her and pull out her chair for her. Once she’s settled, I sit down in my own chair. I can’t help but simply stare at her as she loads up her plate with food, so glad that we have this time alone together. Ever since I got home from Hawaii a week ago it’s seemed like she’s been incredibly busy and I’ve hardly seen any of her. But we have all night together and I made her promise that she wouldn’t go into work until noon. Maybe if I’m lucky I can convince her to not go in at all.

“So what interesting happened at work today?” I ask after a short moment of silence.

She swallows her food. “I spent almost all day in the back working on a coat so not much.” She begins to raise a forkful of food to her mouth but her fork stops mid journey. “Oh, but you know what happened? Kyle signed a five year contract with me today.”

Kyle seriously comes up with every single conversation we have. He’s an annoying pimple on the face of my life. “Oh?” I ask, trying to seem interested in yet another story about Kyle.

“We just had that six month trial contract which was already over so today we talked about it and we agreed on a five year contact.” She takes a bite of food. “Which is such a relief because he’s been so amazing with everything.”

I desperately want to spit out some sarcastic remark but I keep myself in check because for starters, I’m not going to ruin our perfect evening with this broken record of a fight and second, I’m pretty sure Cassie kind of wants me to bring him up so she can try once again to prove to me that he’s just the most stellar guy on earth. I’m way too stubborn to give into that though so I force myself to swallow my words and smile.

“Sounds like it.”

My eyes fall to my plate and I stare at it, trying to figure out what exactly is bothering me. It only takes a minute before it hits me like a sledgehammer.

Why is she so at ease with a five year contract with someone? That’s a big commitment to undertake. And from a commitment phobia person such as Cassie, shouldn’t that not sit so well with her? A contract is major. You can’t easily get out of those. And I mean, great if she’s slowly getting over dislike of commitment but shouldn’t I be feeling those benefits too? She signs a five year contract with Kyle but freaks out at me mentioning how many kids she wants? Something about that is really off in my eyes.

I’m starting to stress myself out thinking about this too much and I have to make a conscious effort to push it into the back of my mind. I can lose sleep over it tonight. I don’t need to think about it right now.

Instead of letting the conversation revolve around Kyle anymore, I quickly speak with carefully chosen words.

“Cass, you don’t feel like I’m ever pressuring you, do you?”

I can tell my question surprises her because her eyes widen slightly and she takes a few seconds to respond. “Why would you say that?”

I don’t want to let her know that I was talking to Hannah and I’m in on their discussion. “No real reason. I just wanted to make sure that you don’t think that by certain things I say I’m trying to pressure you to be a different person or think a different way than you do.”

She stares at me for a short moment before her face relaxes into a smile. “I don’t feel like you’re trying to change how I am.” She fiddles with her fork and looks to the side before making eye contact again. “Justin, around you I actually feel…” She trails off and seems to struggle slightly with her words but finally gets them out. “I actually feel completely accepted.”

Her words make me feel so good and I swear I can actually feel my heart warm. I don’t want to completely demasculinize myself but I can feel myself tearing up. I take a minute to compose myself before allowing myself to speak. “I’m feeling the exact same, Cassie.” I swallow hard. “The exact same.”

I’m a little surprised at how bright Cassie’s house is as I walk up to it. It’s almost ten thirty at night and it looks like every single light in the house is on. I didn’t call her before I left my house to come over here and I had a few doubts that maybe she wouldn’t be home but I guess I don’t have to worry too much about that.

I let myself into her house and immediately I’m met with the sound of the television. It’s pretty loud considering the time at night and the fact that I can hear it perfectly from across the house. I guess I won’t have to be searching too hard for Cassie.

Something seems off when I near the den and the sounds coming from the TV sound suspiciously like some pro wrestling show. Cassie is the absolute last person who would watch something like that.

Things get a bit weirder when I round the corner of the den and instead of Cassie, I’m met with a vaguely familiar looking guy sprawled out on the couch. He looks over at me when I step into the room.

“Who are you?” I blurt out before I can manage a more polite way to figure out who the hell this guy is.

The guy doesn’t seem put off at all by my words. “Jordan.”

I run the name through my head a couple times before it clicks who this is. “You’re Cassie’s stepbrother.”

“Yeah. Justin, right?”

“Right.” I step further into the room and offer him my hand. “Nice to meet you.”

He shakes my hand and nods. “You too.”

I glance towards the TV. “Are you just up in LA visiting? Cassie never mentioned you were coming.”

“Yeah I decided this morning to come up for a bit. I don’t know how long I’ll stay.”

Jordan seems more interested in the TV than making small talk so I back out of the room. “Nice to meet you,” I say again and Jordan nods at me and utters a “you too”.

The first place I check for Cassie is her room and when she’s not there, I go for the next most obvious spot, her sewing room. The door is shut and I knock on it as I ease it open.

Cassie doesn’t look up from her sewing machine when I step into the room. “Jordan, I’m in the middle-”

“Hey,” I interrupt her and her head jerks up.

“Oh. Hi.”

I close the door behind me and cross the room to her. She looks exhausted and worn out and I have a feeling that Jordan may be partly to blame for that.

“I didn’t know you were coming over,” she says when I reach her.

“I was going to call but then I didn’t,” I reply, going to stand behind her. I begin to massage her shoulders and she leans her head back to rest on my chest. “So Jordan’s here, huh?”

A sigh escapes her. “He just showed up this afternoon. No call, no warning. Nothing.”

“How long is he going to stay?”

“I don’t know. I can only handle him for so long.”

I work my hands across her shoulders until they meet at the base of her neck. “You could call your Mom. See if she knows why he’s out here.”

“He’s out here because he has nothing better to do. All my mom will do is tell me to let him stay with me because he’s family.”

I lean down and plant a kiss on the top of her head. “He’ll probably only be here for a couple days.”

“I hope so.”

“You look exhausted,” I say after a minute of silence. “You should go to bed.”

She twists her head to look at me. “Are you staying over?”

“Is that okay?”

She gets up from her chair and wraps her arms around me in a hug. “Yeah,” she replies, burying her head in my neck. “You can keep me from killing him.”

I laugh and run my hands up and down her back. “You’re so dramatic.” I kiss her temple and then pull back and grab her hand. “Come on.”

She follows me out of the room and then pulls me in the direction of the den. She comes to a halt in the doorway.

“Jordan, we’re going to bed. Want to turn it down?”

He picks up the remote and the noise from the TV reduces. “Your mom just called.”

“When?”

“Like five minutes ago.” He tosses the cordless phone towards her and she catches it. “I said you were with Justin and she wants you to call her back.”

Cassie tenses up beside me and I run my hand up and down her side, hoping to relax her a bit.

“Do you need anything before I go to bed?” she asks, her voice sounding a bit strained.

“I’m cool.”

“Okay. Can you turn off the lights before you go to bed?”

He nods and then Cassie turns abruptly. She’s barely halfway up the stairs before she’s on the phone calling her mom. By time we’re in her room, she’s already arguing with her and I sit on the edge of the bed as I listen to her side of the conversation.

“If you knew he was coming out here, why didn’t you call and tell me?...Because all he’s done since he got here is watch my TV, talk on my phone, and eat my food! And he’s going to do that until he leaves, which could be in weeks! I can’t deal with him, Mom!” She runs and hand through her hair and goes over to the doors to the balcony. “He’s NOT my family. He’s Grant’s kid. And I don’t have time to deal with him mooching off of me.”

From where I am, I can see Cassie getting more and more agitated and I have the biggest urge to go over and just hang up the phone for her. But I realize how much drama that would cause with her mom so I stay sitting.

“He’s just sitting downstairs with the TV blaring and I’m sure it’s going to stay that way all night. How am I supposed to sleep?” She stops for a second and her eyes widen a bit. “What does THAT mean? Who cares if he’s over here?...Yeah, Mom, I guess it doesn’t matter if the TV’s on all night because I’m going to be having wild sex all night long…What? That’s exactly what you’re implying!”

I guess I’m now being brought up in the conversation. I never have figured out what Isabelle has against me, but I feel like she never misses an opportunity to bash me. Cassie doesn’t need this and I sure as hell don’t need it so I get up and go over to her.

“Hang up,” I say. She stares up at me and I repeat my words. “Hang up. You don’t need this.”

“I have to go, Mom,” she states and then hangs up the phone and lets her arm drop to her side. I take the phone from her and toss it onto the bed and then bring up my hands and run them over her hair.

“Just ignore what she says, okay?”

She nods but her chin is already trembling. “She’s such a bitch.”

The last thing I want is for her to be crying over how stupid her mom is so I kiss her quickly and bend my knees so I’m eye to eye with her. “I know. But you gotta just ignore it. What she says or thinks doesn’t matter.” I kiss her again, this time for longer. “Okay?”

She nods, her head dropping down. Her shoulders heave with a large sigh and I step forward to hug her. “What do you need to do to get ready for bed?”

“I just need to change.”

“Go do that and I’m going to go turn off some lights so you’re electricity bill this month doesn’t break you.”

I get the first smile out of her all night. “Okay. Don’t be long though. We have a lot of wild sex to get to.”

She’s obviously joking considering she looks like she’s about to pass out from exhaustion but I go along with it anyways. “When don’t we?” I say, giving her a quick kiss and then leave her room, planning on turning off the lights quickly so I can get back to her as fast as I can.

* * *

I’m completely in my own world, pinning a hem, when two hands go over my eyes and a voice in my ear goes, “Guess who.”

I twist my head around to see Justin standing behind me. “What are you doing here?”

“I just finished golfing with Trace and I was nearby so I thought I’d come see what you were doing. What are you doing?”

“I’m trying to get this hem right,” I say, turning back to the fabric in front of me. “It won’t work the way it’s supposed to.”

Much to my irritation, Justin pulls my hands away from the dress. “Take a break.”

A particularly annoying habit of Justin’s is that when he wants some attention, he won’t leave you alone until you give him what he wants. I really want to get this hem done but with the look I can see in his eyes, I have a feeling that won’t be happening anytime soon.

“So Jordan left this morning?”

I sigh and take my eyes away from the unfinished dress. It’ll have to wait. “Yep.”

“How glad are you to be rid of him after two weeks?”

I groan and shut my eyes. “So glad you have no idea. I need to do some major grocery shopping though. He cleaned me out.”

“You know, Elodie, Chris, and Emma are awesome. But Jordan…I really couldn’t handle him.”

“I know. He’s a lazy ass who contributes nothing to society. But he’s gone now.”

“Now we can actually go to your house again. We won’t have to hide out at mine.” He smiles. “Not that I minded having you over every night. I could definitely get used to having a roomie like you.”

I brush off his words and change the subject before he starts talking about something crazy like moving in together or something. “What are you doing tonight?”

He cocks his head to one side and gives me a look like I’m forgetting something. “Allie’s birthday, remember?”

Shit. So I am forgetting something. He had told me about his friend’s girlfriend’s birthday party a couple weeks ago and I had said I’d go and then completely forgotten about it. Going on tonight is the last thing I want to do. “Oh right.”

“You forgot, didn’t you?”

“Yeah.” I check my watch and sigh when I see it’s already four thirty. “What time is it at?”

“Eight. I thought we could go back to your place now and you could change and then we could go grab a bite to eat before the party.”

He has this all planned out and I realize there’s no way I can get out of going at this point. “How late is it going to go?”

He shrugs. “Late probably. We don’t have to stay forever. I told her we’d be there though so we should probably stay for at least a few hours. It’s not like you have anywhere to be tomorrow morning. We’ll stop for coffee on the way if you want.”

I stifle a groan and nod. Going out tonight was my last intention tonight. I don’t even know this girl whose birthday it is. But because Justin knows her and she invited him, I automatically have to go too. These couple obligation things can really become a pain in the ass. “I just don’t want to stay out really late.”

“We won’t,” he replies. “So are you ready to go right away?”

“No. Why didn’t you call before just showing up?”

He’s silent for a minute and the carefree look has fallen from his face. “I thought you might enjoy the break,” he finally says slowly. “Why are you in such a shitty mood?”

I drop my head and rub my temples. “I’m tired. I just wanted to have a night at home where I don’t have to worry that Jordan is going to destroy something. I wasn’t planning on going out.”

“You can have any other night to just sit at home. I told you about this two weeks ago.” He crosses his arms over his chest. “Look if you really don’t want to go then forget about it. I’ll just go by myself. I just thought you would want to have a night to go out and finally meet all these people that want to meet you.”

He sounds like he’s getting annoyed and I’m beginning to feel bad for being such a downer. I’m just coming up with the words to apologize when I hear a voice coming from outside the open door of my office that makes me stop. I stand up abruptly and move past Justin, ignoring him as he questions me.

“Mom,” I say, halting her conversation with Kyle. “What are you doing here?”

She turns from Kyle to me. “Now, Cassandra, is that any way to greet your mother? Come give me a hug.”

I cross the showroom and let her hug me, giving Kyle a questioning look as I put my arms around her. He simply shrugs.

“What are you doing here?” I repeat, pulling away. “You never said you were coming to LA.”

“Grant is away on business so I thought I would visit you and Elodie. I thought you would enjoy the surprise…” she trails off and her eyes land on something behind me. “Oh. Hello, Justin.”

I turn to see that he’s come out of my office and is now standing somewhat uncomfortably in the doorway. “Hi, Isabelle. How are you?”

“Fine.” She doesn’t even bother asking him how he is and instantly my previous annoyance at Justin is directed to her. I move away from her and go to stand by him, pulling him a bit more into the showroom.

“So how long are you staying?” I ask, wrapping my arms around my stomach. It’s funny how simply my mother’s presence has the ability to make me uncomfortable in my own showroom.

“A week,” my mother replies and my shoulders instantly slump. “I thought I’d stay at your house since Elodie has her hands full with Emma already.”

I have to force a smile onto my face. This is the last thing I need right now. “Okay.”

“You never told me Kyle knew about interior design, Cassandra,” my mom says, turning back to Kyle with a smile on her face. “He was just saying how he helped with the interior decorating in here. I have to say again how wonderful it looks, Kyle.”

My irritation grows at her words. On her previous visit to the store, she had torn apart the interior design of my store, calling it too modern and tacky. But now that she knows Kyle had helped with the design she suddenly loves it? I think Kyle is great too but I can see exactly what my mom’s doing. She loves Kyle and thinks I should be with him. And she won’t even give Justin a chance.

“Thanks, Isabelle. I can’t take all the credit for it though. I just helped out here and there.”

“Oh hush. You’re being modest. I know talent when I see it. You know I can see why you and Cassandra get along so well. You have so much in common.”

I can feel Justin tensing beside me at this touchy subject and I’m ready to step in and change the subject but my mother speaks again, saying exactly what I was praying she wouldn’t. She says it to Kyle but her voice is loud enough so both Justin and I can hear.

“I still wish she had held off on jumping into a relationship so quickly when she moved here because the two of you would be so perfect together.”

“Mom!” I yell, making everyone jump. “What the hell is wrong with you?”

My mom looks completely shocked at my words and puts her hand on her chest. “Cassandra, watch your mouth.”

“No! You can’t just come in here and say things like that! You’re being completely unfair to Justin!”

She rolls her eyes and sighs. “I said nothing wrong. And you shouldn’t be speaking for Justin. If he has a problem, he can say it himself.”

I don’t want him to say it himself because I can tell that he’s absolutely on edge beside me. When my mom had made that idiotic statement about Kyle he had dropped my hand and his hand had curled into a fist at his side. This unspoken subject of Kyle and me is a sensitive one already and having my mom throw it out there is enough to infuriate him.

“No, Mom, you can’t-”

“With all due respect, Isabelle, you are being a complete bitch.”

Her mouth drops open and I shut my eyes at Justin’s quiet voice. This is not going to be pretty.

“Pardon me?”

“You show up here unannounced and make all these snide comments directed towards me? I have never done a damn thing but be polite and respectful to you and all I’ve ever gotten in return are rude comments.”

He takes a step forward and I reach out to grab his hand but he pulls it out of my grasp and points a finger at my mom. “If you want to hate me for no reason, fine. You don’t have to respect me or what I do. But at least have enough respect for your daughter and her choices to keep your mouth shut.”

My mom’s hand is on her chest like she’s about to have a heart attack and I’m not too far behind. This is bad.

Before anyone can say one more word, Justin’s already on his way to the door. He storms out without a word and the silence only lasts a brief moment before my mom destroys it.

“He has a lot of nerve, Cassandra! How dare he say those things to me!”

Now that his words were out in the open, I actually felt a bit liberated to agree with him. “You were out of line, Mom,” I say, trying to keep my voice under control. “You can’t just say things like that.”

“Oh, I hardly said anything. What do you possibly see in him?”

I can’t handle anymore of this so I stalk into my office, grab my bag and then walk back into the showroom.

“Stay with Elodie and Chris tonight or get a hotel. I can’t deal with this.”

“Cassandra…”

I don’t think I’ve ever ignored my mother so completely before but if I talk to her anymore, I’ll probably explode so I keep walking. She calls my name once more but I don’t turn around and instead push my way out of the door and away from the store.

I’m usually so good at keeping my temper in check even when provoked. I’ve gone through so many interviews where people say things just to get a rise out of me but I’ve almost always been able to deal with it and not let people get the best of me.

But there was something about Isabelle saying what she did that made me lose it. Maybe it was because she kept talking up Kyle. Maybe it was because of how she was treating Cassie. Whatever it was, I was dealing with it until she said her stupid little remark about Cassie dating Kyle. I don’t even quite remember all of what I said because it came out so fast and without much thought.

But you know, I don’t really regret it that much. Isabelle is a bitch and who says what she says in front of their daughter’s boyfriend? If she really thinks that Kyle and Cassie are so suited for each other than she can either keep it to herself or say it to Cassie privately.

I’m realizing that this is just how Isabelle is but it really pissed me off. It’s bad enough that I bend over backwards to try and get Cassie’s mom and stepfather to like me. But it’s made it a million times worse to find out that Isabelle absolutely loves Kyle and wants him to go out with Cassie. I have enough personal issues about Kyle as it is. I don’t need Isabelle putting ideas into Cassie’s head about her dating Kyle.

I probably shouldn’t have said what I did how I did. Not that I didn’t mean it all but it probably came across horribly. If I hadn’t sealed my fate with Isabelle before, I sure of hell have now. I can basically kiss any hope of a good relationship with her goodbye. That thought doesn’t upset me that much considering there wasn’t much there to begin with. But now that I’m a tiny bit calmer, I’m thinking about Cassie. She has major issues with Isabelle but it’s still her mother. She may not be too happy with me and I really don’t want to fight with her. I might have to swallow my pride and apologize.

I may have to do that apologizing faster than I thought because there’s a tap on the passenger’s side window of my car and when I look over I see Cassie standing there. I reach over and unlock the door and she gets in.

“Cass, I’m-”

“There’s paparazzi out there,” she interrupts me, her voice soft. “Can you just lose them?”

I nod, slightly relieved that I don’t have to start my apologizing quite yet. I need to chill out a bit before I do that.

I’ve just turned into some residential streets to get away from the paparazzi when I hear a sniff from beside me and a quick glance to my right confirms that Cassie’s crying. I was planning on waiting until we got to her house to say anything but I don’t think I can wait at this point. Figuring this street is private enough, I pull over to the side of the road and turn off the car. The silence is deafening and I force myself to break it.

“I shouldn’t have yelled at your mom.”

Cassie wipes the stray tears on her cheeks and shakes her head. “I hate her so much sometimes.”

“You don’t hate her. She’s your mom.”

“How can you say that after what she said?”

Okay so maybe I don’t have to be apologizing. “Look,” I say, turning in my seat so I’m facing her. “I was really rude to her. I could have said what I said a lot more nicely and in a different setting.”

Cassie leans her head against the headrest and stares in front of her. “She doesn’t like you.”

That much is obvious but it kind of really sucks when Cassie confirms it. The way she says it makes me think that there’s no hope at all for ever having a good relationship with her mom. That it’s just a done deal.

“Yeah I got that after this afternoon.” I sigh and rub my temples with my fingers, trying to push away the headache that’s rapidly forming. “So do I need to apologize to her?”

“No.”

Her response surprises me a bit and I glance over at her. “I don’t?”

“She was in the wrong and she deserved it. What I said after you left wasn’t much nicer.”

“It’s gonna be an awkward night with her at your house.”

“I told her to stay with Elodie and Chris tonight. I’ll deal with her tomorrow.”

“You actually told her to stay at their house?”

She turns her head to look at me and nods. “I can’t have her at my house tonight. I just need one night to myself.”

“So I take it you aren’t planning on coming to Allie’s birthday.”

She’s quiet for a minute and I can almost predict her answer. She didn’t seem too into it when I had brought it up before and now after all the drama with her mom, she probably just wants to take a bath and go to bed. I’ve already accepted the fact that I’ll be going alone tonight when she surprises me with her answer.

“No, I want to go but I still need to go home and change.”

“Really?”

Her smile looks a little forced but it’s there nonetheless. “I need to drink out my frustration.”

I begin to smile. “Cool. I like drunk Cassie.”

She gives a small smile but it fades pretty quickly. “Just don’t let me get too drunk, okay?”

I reach over and grab her hand, giving it a squeeze. “You got it.”

* * *

“So are you going to be at the house for dinner?” I ask into the phone, checking over my shoulder before switching lanes.

“I’ll be there by five. I’m just leaving the pediatricians but then Emma and I coming back to the house. What did you want to do for dinner?”

“Whatever. I could barbeque.”

“Awesome. So I just talked to Chris.”

“Oh yeah?”

“Yeah. And he’s back on Friday so Emma and I will be out of your hair then.”

“You know I don’t care that you guys are staying with me. It’s been so much fun.”

“Yeah except you haven’t had your house to yourself for weeks. First Jordan and then Mom and now me and Emma.”

“It’s been two weeks since Mom left and I had the house all to myself then. And I’m not going to make you stay by yourself in your house while Chris is away on business. You know I love having you and Emma around.”

“I’m sure you and Justin hardly enjoy having a crying baby around all the time.”

“Well I don’t care at all and if bothers him that much he can easily go back to his very own house instead of being at mine all the time.”

“Ooo, do I sense some resentment in your tone, C?”

I shake my head and then realize she can’t see it. “No.”

“He does seem to be over an awful lot of the time.”

I conceal a sigh. “Sometimes I think he’s under the impression we live together, which isn’t going to be happening anytime soon.”

“Is he that hard to live with?”

“It’s not that. I’m just really not ready to take that step and live with him. It’s been like nine and a half months.”

“By nine and a half months Chris and I were engaged.”

“That’s because you’re insane.”

“I am not,” Elodie says, pretending to be offended. “When you know it’s right why prolong everything?”

Elodie and I can be such opposites with stuff like this. I can’t even wrap my mind around her mind frame sometimes. “It worked for you but that really doesn’t work for me.”

“You should listen to your younger, wiser sister, C.”

I roll my eyes and press my foot on the brake as I near a four way stop. “Uh huh. I think I’ll fend for myself on this.”

“Whatever. I’m getting into the car so I’m going to hang up on you now.”

I smile. “See you later.”

“Bye.”

I get off the phone just as I pull into my driveway. Justin’s car is already sitting there, which has become the norm lately. It’s not that I mind his company but sometimes it’s nice to just come home to an empty house and not have to talk to anyone or be sociable. I’ve said that to him before and he says that just because he’s there doesn’t mean that I have to entertain him. But when I have people in my house I can’t just let myself go and do my own thing. He doesn’t get that.

The house is silent when I walk into it and I don’t say anything to let Justin know I’m here. Maybe he’s sleeping or something and if that’s the case, I can go have some time to myself before Elodie and Emma get back to the house.

Kicking off my shoes, I make my way upstairs, leaving a trail of my things on the ground. I may have some neat freak in me but sometimes leaving stuff laying everywhere is highly satisfying.

My coveted alone time is quickly shattered when I go into my bedroom and find Justin sitting on the edge of the bed. He’s leaning forward staring across the room with his forearms resting on his thighs and he doesn’t look at me when I enter. Everything about him seems off and I stop and stare at him for a second.

“Is something wrong?”

He finally turns his head to look at me and his eyes have a slightly dazed look to them. “Cassie.”

“What?”

He holds up his hand and for the first time I realize he’s holding something in it. “You left this sitting on the counter in your bathroom.”

I stare at the box in his hand for a second before it clicks what exactly he’s holding. I open my mouth to speak but before I can get anything out, he’s already standing and speaking.

“I freaked out at first but then I started thinking about it.” He looks at the box and then tosses it onto the bed. “I’m not freaking out anymore.”

I open my mouth to stop him but he puts his fingers over my mouth, halting my words.

“I don’t really get how it happened since we’ve been careful but things happen for a reason, right? And you know how much I love you and nothing’s going to change that. And if you’re pregnant then we’ll figure it out from there.”

I push his hand away from my mouth and stop him before he can go any further. “Justin, stop.”

“I’m just saying that-”

“Seriously, stop. That’s not mine.”

His eyebrows draw together and he looks completely confused. “But-”

“Elodie’s been feeling sick the past couple mornings and she thought there could be the chance she’s pregnant again. So she asked me if I’d get her a pregnancy test while I was out today. It’s her, not me.”

His mouth drops slightly at my words and a mixture of emotions pass over his face. “You’re not pregnant.”

“No,” I breathe out with a laugh. “Not even close.”

He scrubs his hands over his face and a big breath of air escapes him. “Wow. I was really going over possibilities in my head there.”

I smile a bit and go into my closet to change my clothes. “Maybe next time you should call me before you get all worked up over nothing,” I call out to him.

“Maybe next time you shouldn’t leave a pregnancy test just sitting out right on your bathroom counter,” he retorts.

I smile and pull my shirt over my head and then go back into my room. I quickly check my appearance in the mirror and then head towards my door. “I can’t believe you thought I could be pregnant. That would not be good.”

I’m halfway down the stairs when Justin comes out of my room and catches up to me. “Why would that not be good?”

I give him a look. Is he crazy? “Because I don’t want to be pregnant.”

“What, you never want to have kids?” he asks, following me into the kitchen.

“I didn’t say that. But neither of us are ready to have a child right now.”

“Why not?”

It takes work to suppress a groan. Why is he pursuing this subject? “Because we’ve been dating for like nine months, Justin.”

“Yeah but it’s not like we’ve been just messing around. We both love each other and if it turned out you were pregnant it shouldn’t be a bad thing. If we love each other than what’s the problem?”

I can’t believe we’re actually having this conversation. “I don’t want to have a baby right now, Justin,” I state using a tone that suggests he drops the subject. He doesn’t.

“What if you’re pregnant right now?”

“I told you that test was Elodie’s!” I say, my exasperation growing more and more the longer he drags this out.

“I know that. But what if you actually are and you just don’t know it yet.”

This conversation is getting more and more bizarre and irritating the longer it goes. “Seriously.”

He raises his eyebrows at me and leans back against the counter behind him. “Seriously. Then what would you do?”

“Justin, I’m not pregnant. I would know.” I pull some potatoes from the pantry and let them drop on the counter. “Stop talking about it.”

“Why does it bother you so much?” he asks and I can see the challenge in his eye. He never just lets things go. He has to push and push until you either give in or are just too exhausted to continue arguing. “Why can’t we just have a grown up conversation about this?”

“Because we’re talking about nothing! We’re talking about an issue that’s not even real.”

“But it could be one day so why can’t we just talk about it now?” He crosses his arms over his chest and stares at me. “Why are you so against having a baby with me?”

“Oh my gosh,” I mumble, dropping my head into my hands. Did he seriously just ask that? I don’t know whether to laugh or cry and this conversation. “Justin.”

“What? Is it because that’s too much commitment or something? Do you not want to have an attachment to me like that in case something went wrong?”

“You’re sounding like more and more of an idiot the longer you talk. You realize that, don’t you?”

He rolls his eyes. “You need to-”

“Shut up,” I interrupt him when I hear the front door open. “We’re not talking about this anymore.”

He looks towards the doorway and then back at me. “I’m sure Elodie can give us some privacy for a few minutes.”

Elodie would be more than happy to give us privacy but that’s not what I want. What I want is for this conversation to be over with and never brought up again. “This is a ridiculous thing to talk about and I don’t want to discuss it anymore. Just leave it alone.”

“We’re just ignoring it then?” he asks with raised eyebrows.

“Yes,” I force out. “We’re ignoring this conversation that never should have manifested into a conversation in the first place.”

He opens his mouth to say more but Elodie breezes into the kitchen with Emma before he can.

“Traffic was surprisingly good,” she says, passing Emma to me and then going over to the sink to wash her hands. “I don’t know how we managed to avoid rush hour. Are you staying for dinner Justin?”

He finally pulls his eyes away from me to look at her. “That was the plan.”

“Great. There’s still some of that apple crisp in the fridge for dessert.” She smiles over at him. “That is if you didn’t eat it all this afternoon.”

He smiles but it looks forced. “I think there’s still some kicking around. I need to get that recipe from you though. That stuff kicks ass.”

“It’s our grandma’s secret recipe but I can probably part with it for you. I don’t think you’ll go blab it to the newspapers or anything.”

His face relaxes a bit. “I’ll try and refrain.”

Elodie couldn’t have come at a more perfect time because she keeps conversation going with Justin and prevents him from pulling me back into our previous argument. If only she could be around all the time because I have a feeling that Justin isn’t too keen on ignoring this whole pregnancy discussion. Maybe it’s just some weird reaction to finding the pregnancy test and he’ll forget about it by the end of the night. I can only hope.

“Seattle’s really boring without you.”

I glance away from the price tag on a dress to look at Hannah. “I told you it would be. I’m the life of the party.”

She smiles and hits me in the arm. “I’m serious. It’s not the same without you.”

I push through some clothes on the rack. “I still think you should move down here.”

Hannah’s silent for a minute before speaking. “I’m actually kind of considering it.”

I pause my hand on a silk dress and look over at her. “Really?”

She shrugs. “Well I was talking to one of my old profs about counseling jobs and he mentioned a couple jobs down here.”

“That’s because every person in LA is in therapy.” I follow her further through the clothing boutique. “So you’re actually considering it.”

“I just need a change from Seattle and I’ve always wanted to live in California. And you’re here.”

I smile and throw my arm around her shoulders, squeezing her into me. “And we work better together.”

Hannah laughs and pinches my cheek. “That’s right we do.” She moves over to a table of folded shirts. “I don’t know. I have to look into it a bit more. I was thinking tomorrow I’d go look into those jobs while you’re at that meeting.”

“That would be so much fun if you lived out here.”

“I know. I miss our coffee dates.” She holds up a shirt and then drops it. “Plus my wardrobe has really been suffering without your fashion advice. I don’t know what the hell to buy anymore.”

I pick up the shirt she had dropped. “I like this.”

She grabs it from me. “Done,” she says and I laugh. “Now pick out some pants. My favorite black ones ripped.”

“I know a really good place for pants on the other side of the mall,” I say, giving her a push towards the cash register. “Buy that shirt and we’ll go there.”

“So why haven’t I seen your man at all since I got here yesterday?” Hannah asks as she puts the shirt on the counter. “When you phoned me last week you said he had practically moved in but he wasn’t there at all yesterday.”

I wait until Hannah has her purse and we’re walking out of the store to respond. I don’t need a nosy cashier to go to some tabloid with shit on Justin and I. “I had a talk with him a couple days ago about needing some space.”

She looks over at me as we walk through the mall. “Are you guys on a break?”

“No.” I shake my head. “Not like that. I think he was a little offended when I told him to go home that night but I think I explained myself well enough so that he gets why I just needed a couple nights to myself.”

“Well first you had Jordan staying there and then your mom and then Elodie and Emma. That’s reason enough to need some time to yourself.”

“Yeah. Well that was like three weeks ago when everyone was staying with me but since then Justin had just been over a lot. And it’s not like I hate having him there but I just needed some time by myself.”

“You should invite him over for dinner tonight. I miss that little guy.”

That makes me smile. Hannah and Justin somehow managed to just click perfectly. They really haven’t spent that much time together but when you see them together you would think they’d known each other for years. “I could.” I stumble a bit when Hannah gives me a shove to the side. “What?”

She gives me a look and gestures to the store she’s pushed me towards. “Duh. Victoria Secret.”

I laugh and let her pull me into the store. Hannah is underwear obsessed. Okay, let’s be honest, so am I a bit. We both spend way too much money here and I literally have two dresser drawers devoted simply to Victoria Secret. “I so don’t need more stuff from here.”

“Me neither. But they have a sale on.” She goes over to a table and picks up a black and pink bra. “Look how cute this is.” She tosses it over to me. “Here.”

I examine it. “Why’d you give it to me?”

“Because you actually have someone who will appreciate the underwear you’re wearing,” she says, moving onto another table. “I’ve got no one.”

I take another look at the bra before tossing it back on the table. That thing does not look comfortable. “That lace would kill me.”

“What does Justin like?”

My eyes shoot towards her. “Pardon?”

“For lingerie? Does he like lace? Ribbons? Silk? Leather?” A smile forms over his face. “I bet he likes the kinky stuff, right?”

My eyes widen and I look around to see if anyone is within earshot of her. Thankfully no one is. “Hannah!”

She laughs. “You look so shocked right now.”

I shake my head and press my hand to my cheek. I’m sure my face is bright red. “I cannot believe you asked me that.”

She snorts and picks up a bra. “Don’t be such a prude. I’m just trying to help you pick something out so you guys can improve your relationship.”

I shake my head again and don’t respond. Instead I move around her to the lingerie section. I’m not about to tell her about Justin’s sexual preferences in the middle of a store but maybe she’s onto something with the lingerie idea.

“So ribbons, huh?”

I roll my eyes at her and drop the ribbons I was fingering on a black teddy. “You’re such an embarrassment.”

She laughs and pushes me aside to look at the teddy. “You should definitely buy this. It’s hot.”

I take another look at the teddy and smile. It is pretty hot and I’m really tempted to buy it. “Maybe. It’s ridiculously expensive though.”

“But it’s hot,” she repeats, glancing at her watch. “You should call Justin if you’re going to have him over for dinner. It’s almost four already.”

“I should,” I agree and pull my phone from my purse.

“What’s he doing today?”

“I think he’s at the studio recording.”

“Why is the mighty Justin Timberlake gracing us with another album?”

I smile. “That seems to be the plan.” I dial his cell phone number and put the phone to my ear, moving away from the people around me for privacy.

“Hey,” he greets me after the second ring.

“Hi. How are you?”

“Great. What about you?”

“Good. You never called at all yesterday.”

“Well you said you wanted some space.”

I roll my eyes at his words. He’s so dramatic sometimes. “I said I needed a couple nights in my own bed alone. Don’t be such a drama queen.”

He laughs and I hear the sound of a chair squeaking. I can almost see him sitting in the recording studio, leaning back in a chair in front of the soundboard. “What are you up to?”

“Shopping with Hannah.”

“Right she’s out here for a few days.”

“Yeah. She wants you to come for dinner tonight.”

“Just her?”

I smile. “I’d like you to come over too. If you pick up Chinese food on your way.”

He laughs. “So you want me to come over and supply dinner.”

“Basically,” I smile. A group of young girls near me squeal near me and I cringe and move a few feet away from them.

“Where exactly are you?”

“Victoria Secret. Some high school girls just got really excited about a panty sale.”

“Victoria Secret, huh?” I can hear the smile in his voice. “I like it when you go to Victoria Secret.”

I smirk. “I know you do. Hannah’s trying to convince me to spend my entire life savings here.”

“Well how about this. You find the hottest thing you can find there and use my credit card to get it.”

I had forgotten I had one of his credit cards with me. Man, why didn’t I remember that before? I should be buying everything right now. “Hm, maybe I will.”

“You can wear it later tonight.” He pauses. “That is if I’m allowed to stay over.”

I roll my eyes again. He acts like I cut him off for weeks. It’s seriously been two nights. “I suppose you can.”

“Well now I’m pretty excited for tonight.”

I laugh softly. “Don’t get too excited. You don’t want to scare off your music buddies.”

“I’ll try not to make things awkward,” he laughs. “What time should I come over?”

“We’re still shopping…so maybe six? Does that work?”

“Works perfectly. I’ll see you then.”

“Great. Bye.”

“I love you, Cass.”

I smile at his drawn out words. He always makes a big deal when I try and hang up without saying those words. “I love you too, Justin,” I mimic in his exact tone.

He laughs. “Bye.”

“Bye.” Hanging up the phone, I go back over to where that teddy is. Now that I have a free credit card at my disposal, I think I’ll have to take a closer look at this thing.

* * *

I guess the bass of my music gave my arrival away because I barely have my key to Cassie’s house out when the front door opens and I’m met with Hannah’s smiling face.

“Justin Timberlake.”

I feel my own smile spreading across my face. “Hannah Webb,” I reply. “You look great.”

Her smile widens. “Why thank you.” She opens her arms. “Well put those bags down and give me a hug. I don’t have all day.”

I laugh and do as she says, setting the bags of Chinese food down on the step and wrapping my arms around her in a hug. “How’ve you been?”

She squeezes me back. “Fabulous. And yourself?”

“Great.” I release her and reach down to grab the bags of food. “How long are you out here for?”

“Until Saturday.” She closes the door behind me and then turns back to me. “So did you hear the big news?”

“What big news?” I ask, following her through the house to the kitchen.

“I may be moving out here.”

“Really? Sweet. How come?”

“There’s some job openings here.”

I put the bags on the counter and focus on her. “You’re done school right?”

“I finished in May. So I’m not a licensed psychologist.”

“Now there’s a scary thought.”

She hits my arm and I laugh. “Jerk. Don’t be mean to me or you won’t get to hear my words of wisdom..”

I smile and rub my arm where she hit. The girl’s small but she’s pretty powerful. “So do you have interviews lined up?”

“I’m going in tomorrow to the two places to check them out. I have this one prof who really loves me and he knows a lot of people out here and he gave the impression that if I wanted one of the jobs, he’d make it happen.”

“Score.” I open one of the bags of food. “Where’s Cassie at?”

“She’s upstairs on the phone. She said to get her when you got here.”

“I’ll go grab her,” I offer.

“I’ll get things set up down here.”

I leave Hannah in the kitchen and take the stairs two at a time up to Cassie’s room. Sure enough she’s on the balcony, leaning against the railing, the phone pressed to her ear. I cross her room and slide the door open. She doesn’t turn around and I listen to her side of the conversation, waiting for her to notice me.

“Well no, Monday when I’m in we can look at it together and figure out which girls we want.” She laughs. “Well you say this is your expertise area so I’m going to hold you to that…uh huh, sure, Kyle.”

Damnit. Why is she talking to Kyle? She works with him five days a week, much to my distaste, and now she’s talking to him at six o’clock on a Saturday night? Why can’t this guy just get it through his head that Cassie’s taken and he needs to back off?

“Oh no, for sure. We’ll figure it out…” She trails off when I step beside her and she sees me. She offers a small smile to me. “Yeah. Okay well I have to go but I’ll talk to you later…Sure. Bye.”

“So tell me what exactly it is about Kyle that makes him call you about work constantly?”

Okay so maybe that wasn’t the best way to say hello and I’m already regretting it when I see her smile fade.

“Don’t do this, Justin.”

I take a deep breath and look out at the view from her balcony. Our relationship has felt a bit rocky the past couple weeks and I don’t want to rock the boat by bringing up this issue that she refuses to acknowledge. I can just pretend it doesn’t bother me that she talks to Kyle outside of work. For tonight.

“I’m sorry,” I say, trying to come across as sincerely as possible. “Forget I said anything.”

She looks like she would rather tell me off but after her own glance off the balcony, she nods and looks back at me. “Did you bring the food?”

“It’s downstairs with Hannah getting cold.”

“Then we better go eat.”

She tries to move past me but I grab her hand before she can get too far and pull her back to me. “Hey,” I say softly. I bring my hand up to her cheek and lean down to kiss her gently. “I’m glad we’re hanging out tonight. I’ve missed you.”

Her demeanor softens a bit and she gives me a sincere smile. “I’ve missed you too.” She gives my hand a tug. “Let’s go eat before Hannah eats it all.”

I let her pull me from the balcony and through her room. I’m definitely not thrilled about the whole talking on the phone with Kyle thing but for now, I’m not going to worry too much about it. I want to just get things back to normal between us before bringing up any of that shit.

“Shit!”

The word escapes my mouth and it startles me slightly at the sheer amount of frustration in my voice. I’ve been working on a particular row of stitching on this dress for the past twenty minutes and this is the fourth time I’ve had to rip it out because it isn’t right. I’m getting more and more irritated and I should just leave it for the night but I can’t make myself put it down. Fashion Week is in less than a month and I have so much still to do. I’m slowly getting more and more stressed each day and this ridiculous stitching is doing nothing to help. I’m at the point where I feel like I’m going to scream.

The front door slamming makes me jump and my hands slip a bit, causing the stitching to go off center. A few more curses fall from my mouth as I drop the fabric on my worktable. I think I’m going to lose it.

“Cassie?”

Justin’s voice echoes through my house and I reach up my hand to rub my temples.

“I’m in my sewing room,” I reply, taking a deep breath and then picking up the fabric again.

He appears in the doorway a few seconds later. “Hey.”

“Hi,” I say, not looking up at him as he comes further into the room.

“Are you going to be long? I brought that movie.”

“I just need ten more minutes,” I mumble, pulling the last of the thread from the fabric. “You can start it if you want.”

“I’ll wait.”

I stifle a sigh and bring the fabric down to the sewing machine. It’s going to take me longer than ten minutes to do this if he’s standing there because he’ll distract me. Of course he’s not going to understand that.

“Is this for fashion week?”

“Uh huh.”

“How much more do you have to do?”

“A lot.” I glance up at him and some irritation goes through me when I see that he’s juggling three spools of ribbon. He’s going to wreck something. I have to force myself to ignore him and I look back down to my sewing machine.

It’s quiet for a moment and I’ve just grown accustomed to it when he starts to talk again, making my hand jerk and the thread tangle. I groan and don’t let him continue his words.

“Would you stop?”

His words die mid sentence and he gives me a questioning look. “What?”

I push my chair back and go over to him. “Stop talking and stop playing around with my things.” I grab the spools of ribbon from his now still hands and throw them back in the bin they belong in. Now that I’ve started talking I can’t stop. “I can’t do anything with you standing here so just go. Go get something to eat, go watch TV. Just GO!” My voice is loud when I finish and I run my fingers through my hair in agitation.

His face is pretty unreadable and he just stands there and stares at me. Finally, a few long moments later, he raises his eyebrows and then turns and leaves the room without a word.

A large breath of air escapes me and I feel like I’m on the verge of tears as I go back to my chair and drop into it. I make myself sit there for a minute and calm down before I pick up the fabric and tear out the tangled thread.

Miraculously, after only one more attempt, I keep my hands steady enough and get the stitching perfect. It feels like a huge weight has been lifted off my shoulders and my stress lowers slightly.

Now I just have to go deal with a pissed off Justin.

I find him sitting on my couch, flipping through TV channels. He glances over at me when I come into the room and then back at the TV.

“If you don’t want me here then don’t invite me in the first place,” he says, shutting off the TV.

I can tell by his tone and the way that he’s looking at me that he wants to turn this into a fight. Immediately I’m on the defensive.

“I was in the middle of something and you were distracting me,” I reply, crossing my arms over my chest.

“Yeah you could have told me that without jumping down my throat. I didn’t come over here to be bitched at.”

I try to not let his words get to me but it’s hard. “I have a million things to do before fashion week and I’m stressed. This is how I get when I’m stressed out, okay?”

“Maybe next time you can let me know when you’re stressed so I can stay away from you.”

His words are harsh and maybe I deserve them but that doesn’t make it any easier to hear. My earlier desire to scream is quickly turning into a desire to cry and I try to suppress it.

“Fine,” I say softly. I don’t have the energy to do this right now.

“So should I just go then?”

My eyes are stinging with tears and I begin to walk to the door. “Do what you want.”

I make it all the way to my room without letting any tears fall and by time I’m up there and away from everything, I’m able to push the tears away. I still feel like shit but I’m not going to cry. It’s not worth it.

I’ve only been staring at the ceiling from my bed for five minutes when there’s a knock on my closed door. When I don’t answer, the door opens and Justin comes in.

“Why is it that I’m the one who got yelled at and now you’re the one who’s all upset?”

His words aren’t the nicest but his voice is softer and I guess he’s done fighting.

“Do I even get an apology?”

I draw in a deep breath and keep my eyes on the ceiling. I’m not really sure I need to apologize for anything but I’m tired of thinking about this. “Sorry.”

He crawls onto the bed next to me and I move my eyes to him. “Don’t be so stressed,” he says, propping himself up on his elbows so he’s staring down at me. “It’s just one week and you’ll do great. You did great last year.”

I give a slight nod even though I don’t exactly agree with him. It isn’t just ‘one week’. It’s the most important week of my year and everything has to be perfect. I can’t afford to not be stressed.

“You just need to take a load off,” he continues, leaning his head down to mine. “Just forget about work for one night.”

I keep myself from sighing as he kisses my neck. I’m so not into this right now. I don’t have the energy. When his hand starts to go up my shirt, I come back to reality and pull away. “Stop.”

He pulls his head away from mine and stares down at me. “What’s wrong?”

I turn on my side to face him and his hand slides to my back. “I’m so tired.”

He’s quiet for a minute and his hand rubs my back. “Do you want to just watch the movie?”

Some relief goes through me and I nod. “Yeah.”

He pulls away and gets off the bed and holds out his hand to me. I take it and let him pull me up. Maybe I do just need to forget about work tonight and relax with him. It probably won’t make my stress go away but maybe it will help. I can only hope.

- - -

“Eating all alone?”

I lift my eyes up from the sheet of paper in front of me and I’m surprised to see Trace standing in front of my table. “Hi. Yeah I’m being a loner.”

“Mind if I’m a loner with you?”

I reach my foot out and push the chair across from me away from the table. “Sure. You’re here all alone too?”

He smiles and sits down. “Yeah. I came to do probably the exact same thing you’re doing.”

I return the smile. “Fashion Week stuff?”

He holds up a folder I hadn’t noticed he had. “Exactly.”

I’ve always gotten along with Trace but lately we’ve become especially close with the common bond of fashion. He’s gotten really involved in his and Justin’s clothing line and we now always have something to talk about when we end up together.

“So how’s everything going?” I ask. “Are you ready for your show?”

“I think so. It’s coming together. What about you? Your show has way more hype around it than mine.”

Ugh. I wish he wouldn’t remind me of that. Susan’s telling me that every time I talk to her and it only stresses me out more. “That’s what I’m hearing.”

“So are you ready for it? Are all your clothes done?”

“I finished the last piece last night. Now it’s just the details.”

“Same here.” He pulls my closed menu over to him. “Have you already ordered?”

“Not yet.”

He beings to flip through the menu. “So when are you flying out to New York?”

“Wednesday morning.”

His eyes raise up from the menu to me. “So that’s why Justin wanted to go out a day early. He said some shit about getting all the details sorted out but I should have known it was because it was because that’s when you’d be there.”

I slump in my chair a bit. “Oh really?”

He brings his eyes back to me again and he’s quiet for a minute before speaking. “Maybe it’s not my place to ask you this but are things between you guys okay?”

I’ve never talked to Trace about Justin and my relationship before but maybe it’s wouldn’t hurt. He might get this.

“It’s just…” I sigh and look to the side at a passing waitress. “I’ve just been so completely busy the past month with Fashion Week and this is just such a stressful time and I don’t have time for anything but this-”

“And he doesn’t understand that.”

My eyes snap back to Trace when he finishes my words for me. “Exactly.”

Trace smiles a bit and leans back in his chair. “You know we both made William Rast but it’s more of my thing now than his. He’s still involved but it’s just another one of his things. And it’s my main thing. So he doesn’t quiet get all the time and effort that goes into something like a fashion show.”

I already new al that and I was kind of hoping Trace would give me advice on what I could do to get Justin to understand because I can’t take the way things are going much longer. When I finally let myself take a break from work all I want to have is some time to myself. But Justin’s always wanting to do something. I can’t remember the last time I was able to simply sit at home alone, watching TV in my pajamas. The thought of that is pure bliss but seems so unreachable as long as I’m busy with work and Justin’s being so needy and so unsympathetic on how stressed Fashion Week makes me.

“It’s only for another week and it’ll all be over,” Trace says, pulling me from my thoughts. “I’ll make sure we leave on the Thursday flight, alright?”

A small smile comes over my lips. Trace is more intuitive than I gave him credit for. “Thanks.”

He returns my smile and reaches across the table to rub my arm. “Anytime, Cassie.”