The bus stopped in what I’m assuming is the next city.  I don’t usually have a problem falling asleep on the bus but I’m just too pissed off.  Not even pissed off, just annoyed with everyone on the fucking tour. I looked over at Dallas who is having no problem sleeping, even when she’s pissed at me.  Maybe when she wakes up she’ll forget about it.

            “Dallas,” I shook her lightly.

            She opened her eyes but didn’t say anything.

            “We’re at the hotel.”

            She nodded her head and stood up, pulling the hood over her head, not saying one word to me. I guess it’s safe to say she’s still pissed.  I followed her outside and waited in line to get the keys to our rooms. Usually people are fooling around at this point. I mean, everyone is always tired but it’s hard for us to be serious even when we’re tired. But today there is complete silence. I think it has something to do with the fact that everyone hates each other right now.

 The tour’s been going on too long. We need a break. It’s good to have a break for a couple weeks or a month at this point. We all put on a better show when we can stand each other. Thankfully we’ll have a couple weeks off after this show. It’s only two weeks but it should do the trick.

            I was handed my key and followed the crowd to the elevator. Of course they all squeezed in not leaving any room for Dallas or me. I don’t know which would have been the worse situation.

            “Where’s your room?” I asked as we got on the next elevator.

            Dallas held up the key so I could see the room number. Clearly she’s not in the mood for talking.  We stopped at her floor and she stepped off the elevator without so much as a nod in my direction. I don’t even know why she’s mad, but I can’t deal with it much longer. Everyone better wake up and be in a better mood.

            I woke up in a better mood and I’d say half of the people on the tour also woke up in a better mood. The other half were just as cranky as they were before going to sleep. I didn’t see much of Dallas before the show; she seems to be keeping her distance. Before we went on stage we did our usual pre show rituals.

            “Last show before the break. Let’s make it a good one and try and act like we can stand each other,” I joked and everyone laughed.  It’s funny because it’s true. “Let’s put on the best fucking show we’ve ever put on,” I looked over at Mandy. It’s her hometown and we always make sure we do it up when it’s someone’s hometown, “Do it for Mandy. Let’s go.”

            The tour was on a two-week break. I don’t know if that’s what it’s called, but we’re on vacation I guess. All I know is we’re not doing another show for two weeks. I’m actually excited to have some time off. We’ve been on tour for a while and everyone was getting cranky.

            So now we’re back in LA. Everyone is home but since I don’t have a home I’m staying with Rachael in Justin’s guesthouse. I’m actually having fun, she’s probably the one person on the tour that I wasn’t sick of by the time the break came along.

            Justin, on the other hand, I’m still sick of. I shouldn’t say I’m sick of him, I haven’t even seen him in the past couple of days. He’s been with his girlfriend pretty much 24/7. I shouldn’t complain about that. I guess he’s just one of those guys that gets a girlfriend and looses all contact with the rest of the world.

            I heard a soft knock on the open door and looked up from my book to see Rachael leaning against the doorframe, “What’s up?”

            “I have to go run some errands for the superstar. Wanna come?”

            “Yeah,” I stretched my hands over my head before standing up, “Where do you have to go?”

            “I have to drop off some things at the post office and get his dry cleaning,” she continued as I followed her through the house, “Oh and take the dogs to the vet.”

            “For what?”

            “They need their rabies shot,” Rachael laughed at the expression I made. Doctors make me nervous, even vets. I just can’t watch the dogs getting shots, especially these dogs that are usually so crazy and happy. I guess I’ll manage; I’ll just sit in the back and let Rachael do the dirty work. She is the one getting paid for it.  “You can wait in the waiting room,” she read my thoughts.

            “I might have to. I hate shots.”

            She laughed as we walked through the yard, “You’re a loser, you’re not the one getting it.”

            “I can’t even see needles Rach, deal with it,” I answered with a smile.

            “Yeah yeah, you’re crazy,” she smiled as she walked into Justin’s house, “I just need to see if he needs anything else.”

            I nodded my head and followed her inside. Justin was sitting at the counter with his face buried in a bowl of cereal. He looked up, offering a smile, before putting his head back in the cereal, “What’s up ladies?”

            “We’re going to take the dogs and go to the post office, need anything else?”

            “Just the dry cleaning,” he smiled.

            “Yeah, the dry cleaning, that too. That’s it?”

            Justin nodded his head before stuffing the last spoonful of cereal in his mouth, “So Dallas, when are you going to do my room?”

            “What?”

            “The room you said you’d design. How quickly we forget.”

            “I never… said…”

            “You did actually,” he stood up and motioned for me to follow him upstairs. “It’s not that big, have you seen it?” Justin didn’t wait for an answer. He opened the door and let me in, “You can do whatever you want with it. I’m just not into plaid so try to stay away from it. I know you have that weird obsession but…”

            “Yeah, whatever,” I laughed, “I guess I could do some sketches.”

            “Thanks Dallas, that wasn’t so hard,” he smiled. “When did you want me to help you look at apartments?”

            “Oh, no I’m not going to look.”

            He gave me a confused look, “Why are you liking having Rach as a roommate?” I shook my head, “Marty?” I shook my head again, “Then won’t you need an apartment? Where are you staying?”

            “Home.”

            “Home?” he asked skeptically, “Dallas home?”

            “Yes, that is home,” I answered.

            “You’re going back to Dallas?”

            I didn’t think it was that hard to understand. “Yes Justin.”

            “Why the fuck are you going back to Dallas?”

            “The tour will be over. Why would I stay here?”

            He was quiet for a few seconds, “Because you’re a dancer and you’re not going to get any work in fucking Texas.”

            I walked around the empty room to escape his glare. It’s like he’s pissed at me for not wanting to stay here. I don’t have any reason why I would stay. “I’m not a dancer. I told you that from day one.”

            “So you’d just move back home and forget about everything out here?”

            “I’m not forgetting about anything,” I answered with a laugh. He’s acting like a child. “I was just here to visit Marty. I never planned on staying here.”

            “Then why did you want me to help you look for an apartment?”

            I shrugged, “I guess it was just a moment of stupidity,” I laughed but when I looked up at him he was not finding the humor. “I’m not a dancer Justin.”

            “I am so fucking sick of hearing you say you’re not a dancer,” he threw his head back and licked his lips, “You’re the best dancer in the city.”

            I laughed at that and now he’s really getting pissed. “I don’t want to dance.”

            “That’s ridiculous,” he took another deep breath, “And so fucking stupid.”

            “OK,” I answered before turning to look out the window and roll my eyes.

            “What about the European tour? We’re starting that soon, you’re just going to quit? You’re just going to go back to fucking Dallas and room with Audrey?”

            “I don’t know,” I answered honestly, “I’m not planning on like leaving. I’m just saying I’m not going to move out here. I don’t know why you’re getting so fucking paranoid.”

            “I’m not getting paranoid. Whatever Dallas, do what you want.”

            “OK,” I don’t understand why he’s getting so mad at me. “I’ll get you the sketches.”

            Justin nodded his head before running his hands through his hair. I took that as my cue to leave.

            Why the fuck is Dallas planning on leaving? She’s a complete idiot to think that she doesn’t want to dance. Hell she’s an idiot to think that she can go on living her life NOT dancing. I don’t know why the girl won’t admit how much she loves it. She’s an idiot.

            I don’t want to think about her leaving. The show would suck without her; I don’t think we’d be able to find someone even half as good. But beyond that, the tour won’t be any fun without her. What am I supposed to do on all those long bus rides if I don’t have her ass to kick on Wii bowling? This is fucked.

            It just pisses me off that she thinks she could live without dancing. I’d like to see that.

            Dallas has been acting really weird recently. I mean I haven’t really seen her in a couple days. I admit, before the break I was cranky, hell everyone was. But we’ve all had a few days off and away from each other. I do think that has done everyone well. She’s still acting cranky though.

            It wouldn’t bother me if I knew what she’s pissed about. If she even is pissed. Maybe its just PMS, although, I haven’t really noticed it with her before.

            I paced around the empty room wishing I could have the secret as to why girls are so fucking confusing. The reason why I clicked with Dallas from the beginning was because she’s never been so fucking girly. She’s always been the girl that’s just one of the guys. And now all of a sudden she’s a pissy, distant, cranky, girl. I don’t like the new Dallas. I want the old Dallas back.

            That vacation went by way too fast. Just when I was getting used to sleeping in a normal bed we’re back on this bumpy bus.  As for Justin, he’s still acting weird. I guess that’s what happens when people get girlfriends.

            The good news is everybody is back to normal as far as their attitudes. I have gotten more hugs today that I’ve ever had in my whole life. Absence makes the heart grow fonder; I guess that’s true. I did miss everyone and it’s refreshing that we’re all back to being friends. I couldn’t take the rest of this tour with everyone at each other’s throats like we were before the break.

            I was just finishing my lunch when Justin sat down next to me.  “Hey guys, Dallas. Do you have those sketches?”

            “You’re like obsessed with the sketches.” He forgot about them for the whole time since I met him and then now it’s like the most important thing in the world to him.

            “Do ya got um?” he asked with a smile. I nodded my head, “Can I see um?”

            “Now?”

            “Right now,” he gave me a look and licked his lips, “Are you done eating?” I nodded my head, “Then yeah. Now.”

            I stood up and followed him. I grabbed two bottles of water, tossing one over at him. “Thanks,” he answered, “I’m excited.”

            “I know,” I laughed, “You’re like a little kid in a candy shop.”

            “I want to see um!” he rubbed his hands together. I think he has something wrong with him.

            “They’re not that good, don’t get too excited.”

            He laughed at that and plopped himself down on the couch, “Dallas, I’ve learned not to take anything you say seriously with that. They’re not good, just like you’re not a good dancer?”

            I sat down next to him and he grabbed the book from my hands, “OK, calm down. I didn’t really like put too much time in them. You didn’t give me much time.”

            “Shut up with the excuses,” he flipped through the book.

            He’s not even looking at it; he doesn’t know what he’s doing. “OK, slow down,” I moved closer and turned back to the front.  “You want it to be an office right? So you have the desk over here and like the chairs. Turn the page, those are some of the desks I like, like the huge chestnut wood.”

            “Mmhmm,” he nodded his head.

            “You don’t like it?”

            “I do, I just don’t really need a desk.”

            I watched Dallas’s mouth drop and laughed, “What?”

            “You said you wanted an office.”

            “I do,” I nodded my head.

            “You need a desk in an office.”

            “Says who?”

            She took a deep breath, “What office does not have a desk? You need something to put your computer on and your phone.”

            I shook my head; “I have a laptop and a cell so I’m good.”

            She laughed at that, apparently it’s funny now. She was getting pissed but now it’s just a joke, “The point of having an office is so you don’t have to just be good and you’ll have somewhere to do all your work. I swear it’s like someone just told you that you need an office and you have no idea what you’re doing.”

            I nodded my head; she’s got that pretty dead on. “I don’t like desks, it’s too business man.”

            “What about a table? I found some really cute tables.”

            I cut her off; do I look like the kind of man that wants I really cute table? “I don’t want a cute table. What about a pool table?”

            “You have a pool table!” it’s funny to watch her get so annoyed.

            “I could get another one,” I shrugged.

            Dallas rolled her eyes and shook her head, “So basically you just want a play room?”

            “Basically,” I agreed with a chuckle and grabbed the book from her hand, “Forget it. Let’s play.”

            She looked at me like I had two heads. I stood up and plugged in my Wii, I’m seriously addicted while we’re on tour. “What are we playing?” Dallas asked before standing up, it’s good she’s just as obsessed as I am. “Dance Dance Revolution?”

            I hate playing that with her because I suck and she’s so good. She makes me look bad. But that smile on her face is hard to turn down. “Battle?”

            “Of course, we have to battle. I haven’t kicked your ass in a long time, superstar.”

            “We’ll see about that,” I act confident but I know I don’t have a chance. 

            We battled and she kicked my ass. The only time she missed a step was when she was on the ground laughing at my lack of skills.

            “It’s not that funny,” I crossed my hands over my chest.

            “It’s hilarious,” she could not stop laughing, “You’re a dancer, you do it for a living.”

            “I am not a dancer, you’re a dancer. I’m a performer.”

            “Oh please, you’re such a sore loser. You’ve been dancing longer than I have.”

            “This is hardly dancing Dallas.”

            “What is it then?”

            “Hopping, jumping.” I sat down on the couch; I’m done playing this. I’m too much of a perfectionist and honestly there aren’t many people that make me look bad at these things. But damn Dallas is just like me and even fucking better at a lot of things. It wouldn’t bother me so much if she didn’t put it in my face every other minute. I shouldn’t be talking; I do the same to her.

            “You’re ridiculous. So you’re done?” she sat down next to me.

            I nodded my head, “Let’s do bowling.”

            “You’re on,” she smiled. I can kick her ass at bowling. “Or we could do golf.”

            I faked a laugh, “Cute.” She can kick my ass at golf, whether it’s putt putt, 18 hole or fucking Wii. “Go ahead, brains before beauty.” I held out the remote for her.

            “Ha ha,” she laughed sarcastically as she grabbed it from my hand.

            I watched Dallas carefully as she took a deep breath and pulled her arm back. I don’t think she understands she’s not actually bowling. She acts like she’s out there with a literal ball.

            “Strike!” she shouted, throwing her hands up, “Yeah!”

            I grabbed the remote from her hand, “Is there anything you’re not good at?”

            Dallas tapped her chin, “Nothing comes to mind,” she laughed.

            I stood up and managed to get a spare, not so bad. I handed it back to her and sat down, “Were you serious about going back to Dallas?”

            She looked back at me and laughed, “I just said I didn’t want to get an apartment.”

            “Why not?”

            “Seriously Justin?” she handed me the remote, “We talked about this like three weeks ago.”

            “I know,” I nodded my head, “It’s been bothering me.” Did I just admit that out loud? I must have because Dallas is giving me a strange look.

            “Why?”

            “I don’t know, I can’t have my star dancer leaving.”

            “I’m not going to leave in the middle of the tour.”

            I nodded my head; glad she took it that way. I definitely didn’t mean it as far as the tour is concerned but we’ll go with that.  “Then you’re coming on the European leg?”

            She shrugged, “I don’t know, do I have to give you an answer right now?”

            “What else are you going to do Dallas? Golf? Design offices for people who don’t want offices?”

            She laughed sarcastically and rolled her eyes.

            “I need you to do it,” once again my mouth just doesn’t listen to my brain. Dallas gave me that look again and I don’t know how I’m going to get out of this one.

            Luckily she didn’t ask for an explanation with that one, “It’s your turn.”

            “Justin,” I heard a knock on the door and Rachael walked in handing me a cell phone, “Johnny wants to talk to you.” I love my cousin. She’s amazing and she saves me even without realizing it.

            “We’ll finish this later,” I pointed the remote at Dallas, she laughed and left with Rachael.

            I think it’s safe to say Justin has lost his mind. He’s like a totally different person when his crazy girlfriend isn’t around him. It’s the old Justin; I think everyone likes him better when she’s not around.

            “Come here, come here,” Rachael pulled me into another room.

            “What?”

            “OK,” she sat down grabbing a magazine in her lap, hiding the cover against her chest, “First you know we’re not supposed to like, be reading these things. And he would flip if he knew I was getting my information from this but I didn’t buy it. It was here.”

            “OK?” I asked with an uncomfortable laugh. She’s taking this very serious so I probably shouldn’t be laughing. Rachael handed me the magazine, with Justin and Jess on the cover, the pictures of Jess with a bunch of other celebrities that she once dated. “I don’t get it.”

            “Look at all the people she’s dated, each one a little more famous. I just don’t trust her, she’s shady. She’s so fake and she’s totally using him.”

            I nodded my head.  They all really have each other’s back in that family and it’s really refreshing. “Then tell him?” I suggested.

            “He doesn’t listen, he’s like so naive when it comes to that shit,” she paused and tapped her fingers against the arm of the couch, “I’m overreacting, right Veda? I just don’t like her.”

            “I don’t like her either,” I answered honestly.

            “Well, she’s coming tomorrow so, maybe we can talk to her.”

            I shook my head, “Why are you getting me involved?”

            “Because you’re like his best friend. He’ll listen to you.”

            “I doubt it,” I answered honestly. I think he knows what he’s doing. He’s a big boy; I think he’s smarter than we’re giving him credit for. Maybe he doesn’t mind being used, maybe he’s using her just as much as she’s using him. She is pretty, maybe that’s all he’s looking for.

            The show was amazing. I never realized how much I missed going out on stage every night until I got back to it. I walked out of the venue with Justin, “Try to trip me one more time Dallas.”

            I laughed, “Pay back is a bitch.”

            “I never tripped you on purpose, you were in my way,” he answered with a chuckle.

            “And you were in my way,” I smiled as I followed him on his bus, “That was awesome though, I missed going on stage.”

            Justin nodded his head, “So you’re coming to Europe?”

            I rolled my eyes, “I didn’t say that. What movies did you get for the ride?”

            “Oh, I uh… didn’t get any. I don’t know if you should ride on here.”

            “What?” I asked out of disbelief. Is this a joke?

“She just… gets jealous.”  She, as in, his crazy girlfriend. I’ve been on his fucking bus every day since the tour began, and now I’m not allowed on it?

            It’s so hard for him to say it; he should just fucking say it. “So you want me to go on the other bus?”

            He ran his hands through his hair and took a deep breath, “I just…” he stopped and started to rub the back of his neck, “I don’t know, I mean if you want to stay…”

            “No, I don’t want to stay.” I walked off the bus before he could say anything. Not only is he dating a bitch that he has nothing in common with.  Not only is she a fucking money hungry whore that is only with him because of his name and how he can help her get famous. Not only is that little bitch making him paranoid and unable to do anything without worrying what his little insecure bitch of a girlfriend will think, but she’s taking away my best friend. I can’t even stay on his bus anymore. What is he even going to do by himself? He hates being on the bus alone. He’ll probably call her and talk to her for the four hour bus ride and let her plan even more of his life.

            I pulled my hood up as I walked on the other bus. Everyone stopped talking and looked at me. I heard a lot of people asking if I was ok or what was going on but I ignored them. I just climbed onto my bunk, closed the curtain and blasted my IPOD. This bitch is driving me fucking crazy and she’s on the other side of the country. She’ll be here tomorrow; I might have to slap a bitch.

            I heard the curtain open and saw Marty standing in front of me, “Are you alright?”

            I seriously considered pretending I was asleep or my IPOD was too loud I couldn’t hear him. But then I remembered its Marty who is like a brother to me, and made me do this tour in the first place. I owe him more. “Yeah, I’m fine.”

            “You’re on my bunk.”

            I looked around to see his pictures of his family pinned against the wall. “Oh, sorry. I though…”

            “One up,” he pointed.

            “Sorry Marty.”

            “Nah, you can stay. I’m just letting you know. You’re never on here so you forget. Everyone’s got their shit on it.”

            I nodded my head, “I can sleep out there on the couch.”

            “Not if you want to sleep,” he answered with a smile, “We’re playing poker. Why don’t you come play?”

            I bit at my lip and weighed my options. I could stay in this bunk and be pissed off all night or I could go play poker with my true friends and get my mind off that other kid.  I nodded my head and followed Marty to the back of the bus. 

            A hush formed over he crowd as I sat down in an empty seat. “Whoa, Veda has surfaced,” someone said with a laugh. It took a little while for everyone else to join in. I think everyone’s afraid that I’m just going to break down. It’s not that big of a deal, I’m just pissed, it’s not like I’m going to start crying or something.

            I sat quietly for the first few hands, not really ready to join in the conversations. Luckily these people are so much fun it’s impossible to be pissed off when I’m around them. I heard the engine turn on and the bus took off, beginning the four-hour trip to the next hotel. Now there’s no escaping. 

            I didn’t sleep very well that night.  I feel bad that I told Dallas to go on the other bus; she’s been going on my bus since the tour started.  But I know it would cause drama with Jess. It’s like a lose lose situation. I figure I have to take the side of my girlfriend; I don’t want to get her upset already.

            But Dallas was pissed. Things have just been awkward between us and I don’t know why. I felt the bus stop and grabbed my bag quickly so I could talk to Dallas.  Everyone was laughing and fooling around, that is until they saw me. Each one of them stopped laughing and gave me a dirty look before walking into the hotel.

            Dallas wasn’t laughing when she came out.  She was the last one off the bus, all by herself. The hood of her sweatshirt was over her head and she walked right past me.  There is no possible way she didn’t see me standing there waiting, but she sure as hell didn’t look up for a second.

            “Dallas, wait up,” I called after her. She didn’t slow down so I jogged to catch up with her, “Dallas.”

            I feel like I’m talking to a fucking wall. She’s overreacting just a little.  Dallas got on the elevator and I managed to get on with her before she pressed the door close button, although she tried.

            “Were you trying to ignore me?”

            She looked up at me, “What?”

            I took a deep breath, “Are you coming to my room?”

            Dallas laughed at that, full out laughed, “I can’t go on your bus but I can go in your room?”

            I took a deep breath; she’s gone fucking crazy. “What’s your fucking problem?”

            “My problem?” she shouted, “I don’t have a problem. I’m tired, and you’re annoying the hell out of me. So leave me alone.”

            I made the mistake of looking into her eyes. There is obviously something bothering her, I just don’t know what. But she looks hurt, like someone took a knife and stabbed her in the back.  I hope I’m not the cause of all this, but I don’t really know what I’ve done. She can’t be jealous about Jess. I mean, Dallas has made it pretty clear from day one that I didn’t have a chance with her.

            “You’re just tired?” I asked softly, I’m really starting to worry about her.

            “Yes,” she answered, looking away from me. I swear I saw her eyes water up. What is wrong with her? She’s been so emotional recently.

            “Want to go golfing tomorrow? We can go early and be back in time for the show.”

            “I thought Jess was coming,” she answered in a whisper.

            “Oh yeah,” I bit at my lip. I don’t know how I forgot she was coming. “We could still go. I mean, she could stay at the hotel, by the pool or something.”

            Dallas shook her head, as the elevator door opened, “No, it’s ok I’ll see you later.” She opened the door quickly and closed it even faster, leaving me face to face with a door.

            I took a deep breath and ran my hands through my hair before turning around and walking back to my room. I honestly don’t know what I’m supposed to be doing.  The last thing I want to do is hurt Dallas, but I don’t understand why she’s so depressed recently. Maybe there’s something else going on. It’s a little selfish for me to think this is all about me. But maybe it is. Maybe she is just upset that we’re not spending so much time together anymore. I mean, we were pretty much attached at the hip. I’ll have to hang with her more, even with Jess, we can all do stuff together, that could work.

            I fell to the ground as soon as I got into my room and cried. I’ve been holding it in for a while because I couldn’t cry in front of everyone so now it’s coming out pretty much nonstop. I’m not exactly sure why I’m crying.  All I know is I’m not having fun anymore and I want this stupid tour to be over. I want to go home.

            I had fallen asleep on the floor by the door to be woken up by someone knocking.  I stood up, still wearing the clothes I had on the night before, and opened the door to see Rachael who walked right past me and sat on my bed.

            “Did you make your bed at a hotel?”

            “No.”

            She looked at the fully made bed and shook her head to clear her thoughts, “OK, whatever. The pool is like beautiful. It has like a lagoon and a lazy river. Want to go swimming? It’s so nice out.”

            “Not really,” I lay on the bed, covering myself with a blanket.

            “What’s wrong?”

            “Nothing,” I lied, “I’m just not feeling that well.”

            “Do you want me to get you something? Or someone. Some medicine or something?”

            I shook my head, “I just need to rest.”           

            “OK, well I’ll be at the pool… by myself… with all the hot guys. I swear, there’s like a hot guy convention down there.”

            I smiled, “thanks Rach.”

            She left me alone and I pulled the covers over my head. I think I just need to catch up on some sleep.

            I woke up again to someone banging on my door. I looked at the clock, 2:49, shit. How did I sleep that late? Marty stood at the door smiling when I opened it. “Just wake up?”

            “Yeah,” I nodded my head and walked back in my room, “I was so tired.”

            “And sick?”

            “No, not really. Just tired, I’m fine now. We have to go huh?”

            Marty nodded his head, “You sure you’re alright?”

            “Yes, everyone’s so worried about me,” I laughed and grabbed onto my bag, figuring I could just take a shower at the venue. There’s always so much downtime but we have to be there by 3. I don’t understand why, but Justin is kind of OCD about those things so I don’t want to make him any more annoying. Plus now that his girlfriend is here he’ll probably be even crankier.

            Marty and I walked to the venue down the street; there were already a lot of kids outside. Some of them recognized Marty, it’s really cute because he’s so quiet and he doesn’t like the attention. He signed autographs and took some pictures and then we walked into the venue, showing our passes before being let in. I’m really glad people don’t ask me for pictures or autographs, I’d feel really stupid signing a piece of paper.

            When we got inside there seemed to be something going on. Everyone was walking around and looked annoyed or pissed. No one was talking or fooling around like usual. “What’s going on?”

            “Ask the fucking superstar,” Kenny spoke up, “He wants us all out there to do a run-through in ten. Apparently he got a tape of last night’s show and someone was off. He said we haven’t gotten the show right since the break and now we need to practice.”

            Marty took a deep breath. It annoys him when Justin takes charge like that without even discussing it with him. Marty is the chorographer, so he should be the one Justin talks to if he has any problems. But who knows, maybe now that the girlfriend is here he has to pretend like he’s the one in charge of everything.

            “I’ll be back,” he told me as he went searching for Justin.

            I followed Kenny to get a bottle of water, “He’s gone fucking crazy.”

            “As if we need more practice,” someone else joined in, “I’m sure it has nothing to do with the fact that we’ve been doing this shit for so long and we’re tired.”

            I kept my mouth closed as everyone else talked about their problems. I followed everyone to the stage and saw Princess Jess sitting at the bar while Justin was already on stage. Rachael sat down at the bar, but on the opposite side. I laughed to myself at how blatantly obvious she is about her dislike for the girl.

            “We’re just going to do the whole show.” Justin spoke up. No one said anything to complain now; they just went under the stage. I followed while people whined underneath, until Justin came down.

            We ran through the whole show, just as Hollywood wanted. It was really awkward for the two of us, especially with his girlfriend in the front there watching Justin put his hands all over me.  He totally fucked up one of the moves, elbowing me in the eye, “Ugh, what the fuck?”

            “Sorry, you were in the way. Don’t stop.”

            “Don’t stop? I can’t see out of my fucking eye!” I rubbed my eye, it’s stinging and I see stars.

            “You’re fine,” he answered, “I hardly touched you.”

            “Justin, you elbowed me in the eye. How many times have we been through it that you need to move your arm up more? We’ve been on tour for fucking months.” I know I’m probably screaming a little too much, but I’m letting all my anger out. My eye is killing me and he’s acting like it’s my fault he can’t life up his arm enough. Everyone else was quiet, surprised that I was actually talking back to the superstar. “If I get a black eye, I swear to god.”

            “You’re not going to get a black eye, calm down,” he answered calmly, “I hardly touched you.”

            “Then why the fuck can’t I see out of my eye?” I screamed. My eyes were watering now, I’m not sure if it was because of the pain or for other reasons.

            I felt Marty’s hand on my arm, “Come on Vay, let’s get that checked out.”

            Justin didn’t say anything as we walked away, but as soon as we left I heard him telling everyone that they weren’t done and had to finish the show.

            “Are you alright?” Marty asked, putting his arm around my shoulder. I knew he wasn’t asking only about my eye. He knew there was more to my crying than that pain, but he didn’t have to say anything else.

            I nodded my head and sniffled the tears back, “Seriously, if I get a black eye…”

            “You should be fine.”

            “Why can’t he raise his fucking arm? It’s not rocket science. And then he says we’re all the ones that don’t know what we’re doing.”

            Marty nodded his head, “He’s gone mad,” he laughed as he brought me into the first aid room.

            I feel like I’m back in high school, not that I went to high school, but I feel like I am in high school for the first time. Everyone has their clicks, and right now it seems like it’s me against everyone else. I don’t understand why everyone is so moody and I don’t appreciate everyone talking about me behind my back.  They think they’re being sneaky, but I’m not a complete idiot.

            After we ran through the show I went back to my room with Jess. She just came out here; I hate to be in such a bad mood, but honestly, I kind of wish she wasn’t here. It’s hard enough dealing with all this stress but now I feel like I have to keep her entertained as well. As I walked to the room I heard the whispers, everyone worried about Dallas, like I purposely punched her in the eye. I hardly even touched her; she’s being a drama queen.

            I left Jess alone in the room and had Rachael spread the word that I wanted to talk to everyone. They all met in the locker room area and I took a deep breath before walking in myself. I’m not exactly sure what I’m going to do or say, but I hope the words will just come out. I didn’t start right away because Dallas and Marty weren’t there so I sat down waiting. Everyone else was quiet, I’m sure you could hear a pin if it were to drop.

            Marty walked in first, followed by Dallas who had her hood up over her face and a bag of ice over her eye. My heart sank a little; it looks like I really hurt her. It was an accident, but I sure as hell didn’t want to hurt her or give her a black eye.  Everyone looked at Dallas, and then back at me. Well they looked at Dallas with sympathy but glared at me like I did it on purpose.

            “Alright, everyone’s here,” I began, running my hands through my hair nervously, “I just… don’t understand what’s going on with everyone. We’re getting really fucking clicky. Everyone’s talking behind everyone else’s backs. Me mostly, behind my back. If you got something to say just say it to my face. I’m sick of all this high school bullshit.”

            No one spoke up, everyone kind of looked at each other. My gaze fell to Dallas, but she was just looking at the wall keeping the ice on her eye.

            There was awhile of silence before Kenny spoke up, “You’ve been acting like a douchebag recently, treating everyone like shit.”

            “We’ve all been doing our best, we’re tired from everything, we make mistakes,” someone else added.

            “You act like we don’t want the show to be kick ass, like we’re not even trying. We’ve all put our heart and soul in this show.”

            Now everyone’s talking at once. I guess I asked for it, but damn I didn’t think so many people would have so many problems. It seems like everyone has something to say, that is everyone except Dallas.

            “And you’re treating Veda like shit,” Marty spoke up; I didn’t expect him to say anything, although Dallas is like a sister to him. Everyone else got quiet as he spoke, “You’re treating everyone like shit, but especially her. You went from spending every minute with her to cutting her off completely.”

            Dallas stood up and walked out of the room before he finished.

            “I’m not cutting anyone off. You don’t know shit, don’t act like ya’ll know everything.”

            Everyone was quiet after she left, but no one moved. I didn’t know what else to say. “Look… everyone just put all this shit aside while we’re out there. We’ll talk about everything later.” I stood up, leaving them all in the room so they could talk about me some more.

            I’m so sick of all this bullshit; I’m about to bring in a counselor. Everyone’s taking Dallas’ side, not that there’s really sides to be taken.  Everyone is just stressed out and taking it all out on me since it’s my tour. I’m ready for this shit to be over. They sure as hell better be able to focus through the show, or I will find a whole new crop of dancers for the next tour. 

            I can’t believe Justin had the nerve to call everyone into a room and tell everyone that we all have problems. What has happened to him that he thinks he’s the only one stressed on this stupid tour. I really think it should be over now, if it weren’t for those stupid snow dates we’d be almost done.

            It’s nice that everyone is looking out for me, but they’re taking it a little overboard. I don’t care that Justin has a girlfriend; in fact I’m happy he found someone to laugh at his stupid jokes. Now he doesn’t have to annoy me as much. But I hate that they all brought me up during the meeting. Everyone was airing their problems, and that’s great, but Marty didn’t have to say my name and call me out. It’s kind of annoying.

            After the show I walked right back to the hotel. I didn’t wait for anyone, but we have another night here so there’s no need. The problem is that I got stuck with the crowd of kids leaving, but I made it back to the hotel soon enough. I jumped right in the shower and pulled a pair of sweatpants and a hoodie over my head. There was a knock on the door as soon as I got out and I took a deep breath before answering, afraid of who I would find on the other side.

            Justin stood in front of me with a weak smile, “Hey.” He said softly and walked right past me.

            “OK, come on in,” I answered softly.

            “Why do you always have your hood up?” he smiled as he sat down on my bed.

            “What do you want Justin?”

            “What? We can’t hang out anymore?” I took a deep breath, why is he here? Shouldn’t he be spending time with his girlfriend? “How have you been Dallas?”

            “Um, fine. My eye hurts a little.”

            Justin laughed, and reached his hand out to touch my eye, “Sorry about that. It was an accident.”

            I nodded my head, I know I’m being a bitch but I really want him to leave me alone.

            “I’ve been stressed,” he continued softly.

            “We’re all stressed. You act like you’re the only one.”

            He took a deep breath, putting his hands through his hair. “You act like I’m the only one, everyone’s been moody as fuck.”

            “Not as bad as you,” I answered honestly.

            Justin shook his head, his face turning red, “And what’s your excuse? You’ve been quite the bitch recently.”

            “Wow,” I answered softly, I can’t believe he just called me a bitch, “You can leave now.”

            “I’ll gladly leave now,” he stood up and walked to the door, stopping in front of it.

            “Bye!” I shouted, about ready to throw something at him. Why is he stopping, get the fuck out of my face. 

            Justin looked at me before opening the door. I’m so sick of him.  I’m done. He’s been so self centered and obnoxious recently. I can’t take it. I don’t need to take it. The tour is over soon and I’m gone. I’ve made up my mind; I don’t want to do this anymore.

            I grabbed my key and headed downstairs. I don’t know exactly where I’m going but I need to get away from my room. I need to walk or run or do something to keep me occupied. I stepped out of the elevator and looked around the lobby, trying to decide which way to go. Instead of looking the way I was walking, I continued looking around, crashing right into someone.

            “Gosh, sorry,” I looked to see a man on the ground picking up all the papers I made him drop.

            “It’s alright, I’m ok,” he answered with a smile, “Are you ok?” I nodded my head, getting lost in his multicolored eyes, they’re gorgeous, he’s gorgeous. His dark brown hair was shaggy, and he was wearing a blue button down shirt and a pair of khakis.  “Sweetheart, you look like you’re running from a ghost. Are you sure you’re alright?”

            “Yeah, sorry,” I giggled like a little girl, unable to stop, “Sorry I messed up all your papers.”

            He smiled, “You can make it up to me. How about a drink?”

            “I could really go for a drink right now.”

            “Perfect. I’m Matt,” he held his hand out.

            “Veda,” I grabbed onto his hand, “Nice to meet you.”

            “Likewise,” he has a really sexy smile.  He pulled the chair out for me at a table at the bar before sitting down himself.

            Rachael wasn’t kidding when she said there were a lot of hot guys at the hotel “Are you here for the hot guy convention?” I can’t believe I just said that out loud.

            Matt laughed, “I’m the president,” he threw his head down to hide the fact that he was blushing, but it’s kind of adorable, “No, it’s a marketing convention actually. It’s crowded here tonight. It was empty here yesterday.”

            “It’s for the concert.”

            He nodded his head and took a sip from his drink, “Anyone good?”

            I shook my head as I took a sip myself, “Justin Timberlake.” I should probably say that Justin is someone good, especially since I’m in the show, but I’m kind of over Justin right now so we’ll just pretend I’m not.

            “Are you a big fan?”

            I shook my head again, “The show is really good though.” I answered with a smile.

            “Oh yeah?” I nodded my head, “What is it that you do?”

            “I’m a dancer.”

            “For Justin Timberlake?” he raised an eyebrow.

            “Yes,” I laughed.

            “I heard his dancers were amazing.”

            “You did not, shut up,” I laughed.

            He smiled a very sexy smile and grabbed onto his beer, “Honestly, there were some girls screaming in the lobby and I asked them what the big deal was and they said they saw him.”

            “Yeah, he tends to have that effect on little girls.”

            “Worth it?” he asked, grabbing a handful of popcorn.

            “Not at all,” I grabbed some popcorn myself. “So, where are you from Matt?” I don’t want to sit down here and bore this poor, good looking, sexy as hell man with my issues.

            “I’m from Texas, Irving. Near Dallas.”

            “I know where Irving is, shut up.” He looked at me like I was crazy, “I’m from Dallas.”

“No way,” he smiled, “Interesting. When is the tour over?”

            “A couple weeks.”

            “Then back to Dallas?” I nodded my head, although there is a very slim chance I will be going to Europe. But that chance is getting smaller and smaller.

            Dallas had me pretty pissed off so I went right back to my room and passed out.  Jess doesn’t seem really phased by it; in fact I don’t think she noticed. She’s sitting in bed reading a script.

            “Can you turn that light off? I’m real tired.”

            “Sure, no problem,” she answered happily, placing her script on the nightstand and turning off the light. “That was a really great show, I’m glad I got to see it.”

            “Yeah, me too.” I closed my eyes, hoping she would just go to sleep.

            “You look good up there, like you’re having the time of your life.”

            She will not shut up. “Yeah,” I answered softly and wrapped my arms around her. Now I’m just going to pretend I’m asleep if she keeps talking.

The next morning I woke up early. Jess was still asleep, and I didn’t want to wake her, partially because I need some piece and quiet. Honestly, I like the girl but she talks so much. She’s always happy too, it’s almost too much, like it’s fake. I’m not saying she’s fake; I’m saying she’s bubbly.

I’m not exactly the kind of guy that likes the bubbly girls, they get annoying real fast. I’d rather have a real girl.  I wonder if Dallas is up yet, I think I’ll go for a run.

            It was possible for me to sneak out of bed and leave Jess without waking her up.  I went downstairs to see if Dallas was up.  As soon as the elevator door opened I saw her room open, good timing. It would be good timing, except Dallas didn’t come out. Well, she did come out, but first a guy came out. A guy I’ve never seen before. I couldn’t hear what she was saying, or what he was saying, but he laughed, then she laughed. I put my arm in the elevator door to stop it from closing and watched carefully as the guy gave Dallas a hug.

            I moved my hand out of the door and let it close in front of me. I don’t really want to see anymore. My head is racing and I suddenly feel really lightheaded. I sat down on the floor, taking a deep breath. Who was that guy? And why was he leaving her room in the morning? He stayed over. Whoever he is slept in her bed. I don’t know why this is bothering me so much.

            The elevator door opened and I was face to face with the guy. He looked at me, sitting on the ground, and stepped in. I stared back at him, returning the gaze. The truth is he wasn’t gazing at me, he looked confused, almost worried.

            “Do you know what floor you need?”

            I couldn’t speak; instead I just keep staring at him. He pressed the button he needed and stood with his back towards me, sneaking looks back at me.

            “Are you alright man? Do you want me to get something for you? Or someone?”

            I watched him; he looks like he’s having an inner crisis wondering what to do with the crazy Justin Timberlake sitting on the floor of an elevator not able to speak.  He looked away, and then back at me again.

            “I can get you some water,” he offered, “or I can bring you somewhere. I don’t know where… or who… I know uh, one of your dancers. Veda, she’s just… in her room. I can go get her.”

            Yeah, that’s the last person I want you to go get buddy. I’d also appreciate it if you never fucking thought about her again, that means keep your fucking hands off her.

            “I’m fine,” I glared at him, “Just go where you gotta go bro.”

            He nodded his head, surprised that I actually have a voice and am able to talk. The rest of the elevator ride to his room was silent; he didn’t even look back at me when he got off. The door closed after he got off and I still sat there, trying to gather my thoughts.

            I managed to stand up, and against my better judgment I pressed the button for Dallas’ floor. I walked, more like stomped, to her room and banged on the door.  It took a while before she answered it; I heard her yelling for me to hold on before she opened it.

            “Hey,” she answered softly.

            “Yeah, hey,” I answered. Her hair was wet; she just got out of the shower. 

            “What’s up?” at least she’s in a good mood, oh fuck, why is she in a good mood? I don’t like this.

            “So uh… who was that guy?”

            She looked at me for a second, as if she were embarrassed she had been caught, “Just some guy I met downstairs.”

            I nodded my head, “Just some guy you met downstairs,” I repeated.

            “Yeah, why are you yelling?” she answered calmly. I guess I am yelling. I didn’t realize it.

            I took a deep breath, to try to calm myself down, “You just met a random guy and brought him up to your room?”

            “It’s not a big deal.” How can she possibly say that it’s not a big deal, this is the girl that has had sex with one man in her whole life.

            “I think it is. You used to think it was.”           

            Dallas is surprisingly calm; I’m the only one freaking out. “You’re making a scene, people are looking,” she whispered, “Come in the room.”

            I walked inside and sat down on her bed before realizing I was sitting on her bed with covers thrown all over the place. The place that she spent her night… with that guy. I stood up quickly and starting pacing around the room.

            “Are you ok? What’s wrong with you?”

            I took a deep breath, “You had that guy in your room.”

            “OK?” she doesn’t seem to get what the big deal is, how does she not?

            “OK?” I shouted, “OK? Dallas, you don’t even know him. He could be dangerous.”

            “He’s not dangerous.”

            “How do you know? Nevermind, I don’t want to know how you know. Did he get you drunk? Did you have tequila?”

            “No, don’t assume,” now she’s getting pissed.

            “They why? What the fuck?” I paused to try and gather my thoughts, “You know, one out of five people have herpes. Did you know that?” She’s looking at me like I’m crazy, I feel like I’m crazy, but I can’t stop, “And 90% of them don’t know they have it. Do you get that Dallas?”

            “OK, thanks for the herpes fact of the day,” she laughed and started putting her clothes in her suitcase.

            “It’s not funny Dallas.”

            “You’re right, it isn’t funny. You are funny though, like what’s going on? You’re acting like you’re my dad.”

            I took a deep breath, she doesn’t get it. “You had a guy in your room.”

            She nodded her head, “We’ve established that.”

            I don’t understand how this isn’t a big deal to her? What the fuck happened within the last 24 hours that she’s changed her thoughts on the matter? Maybe it hasn’t sunk in yet, maybe she doesn’t regret it yet. She will though, she has to. She knows she’s not the kind of girl that hooks up with random guys that she meets at hotel bars.  She couldn’t have changed so much over night. There’s no way. 

The alarm clock went off way too early and I cursed the fact that I told Justin I would go golfing. It always sounds like a good idea when it’s the night before, but when that alarm goes off at six o’clock in the morning; I wish I had said no thank you when he asked.  I’m trying to be mature, even though Justin has been pissing me off and his girlfriend is a pain in the ass, I miss spending time with him. And I guess there is a chance, as microscopic as it may be, that I’m a little jealous of the girl. So I’m going to be mature and take what I can get.

            I changed into my plaid pants that Justin got me for my birthday. I don’t think I’ve actually worn them yet, but they’re kind of cute. Plus, I haven’t gotten my laundry back so it’s kinda my only option.  There is a chance I’m still asleep, so I walked slowly down to the lobby and sat down on the couch when I didn’t see them. My head fell to the back of the couch and my eyes closed. I just want to go back to sleep.

            “Hey Veda!” a way too bubbly voice woke me. My eyes shot open and I was face to face with Jess herself. She’s crazy like Justin as for being so happy in the morning; maybe they are perfect for each other.

            “Hey,” I answered in an equally bubbly tone, although mine is clearly not as real as hers. Hers isn’t too real either, but that’s beside the point.

            “Morning Dallas,” Justin smiled, handing me a cup of tea and a bag from Starbucks. I opened it up and saw a cinnamon scone. I can’t believe he remembered that. “Cinnamon scone right?”

            I nodded my head, “Thanks J.”

            “No problem, ready?”

            “What about Marty?”

            “He wasn’t feeling well,” Jess answered, still bubbly and fake, “He called Justin this morning, so I guess it’s just the three of us!” she smiled.

            Oh, yippee. I must remember to kill him.

            We drove to the course and I swear I did not have a second of silence. Jess just talks and talks and makes me want to look for a gun or something. And her voice is so high I’m about to get a migraine.

            As soon as we got out of the car Justin grabbed the clubs from the trunk, before putting on the plaid cap I got him for his birthday. He looks like a huge dork, so I couldn’t help but laugh when I saw him.

            “What?” Justin asked with a smile.

            “You look like an old chimney sweeper,” I laughed, “It’s adorable, I love it.”

            “Yeah, thanks Dallas. I like your pants, by the way.”

            “Thank you,” I smiled as I grabbed my clubs, “Does she have clubs?”

            “Nah, I thought she could use yours,” he answered seriously. He has to be out of his mind. There is no possible way I’m letting this girl touch my clubs.

            “Um… no offence to her but…”

            Justin’s laughing stopped me from finishing. “I’m fucking with you Dallas, relax. I know you don’t let anyone touch your clubs. She’s using Rachael’s.”

            I gave him a very fake smile and grabbed onto my clubs, walking away from him and making my way towards Jess. Justin left me alone with her while he went in to get the cart and everything settled. She talked, and talked, and talked. I don’t even know what the fuck she’s talking about, she just won’t stop.

            “Have you played before?” I asked so she would stop talking about stupid shit for a couple seconds.

            She shook her head, “Never. I’m excited to learn.”

            It’s going to be a long day. I hate playing with people who have never played because it takes so long. Plus, I’m pretty sure she’s not one of those natural athletes that can just learn how to do it right away.

            “I know how much Justin loves to play, so I thought I’d give it a try. Plus it’s like really important to him. I mean what’s the worst that can happen? It’s just one day right? You know how into golf he is. I guess you’re into it too, I mean you always go with him. That’s cute that he has someone to play with all the time, especially when I’m not here. ”

            I nodded my head and stopped listening when I saw Justin in the distance. He needs to come back and save me now. How does he put up with all the talking? I don’t get it. I’m trying to be nice but I’m about to snap and we didn’t even start yet.

            Luckily it didn’t take him long to drive the golf cart over. Jess got right on it, still talking, while I helped Justin put my clubs in. Justin laughed at the look I gave him, “She talks a little huh?”

            “Are you fucking kidding me? Is she always like this?”

            He nodded his head, “Always.”

            “Good God.” I’m glad he agrees with me, but damn.  I hopped into the cart and Justin drove away, looking back and giving me looks as she continued talking. He even cracked a couple times and laughed, but Jess was too busy talking to realize it.

            We stopped at the first hole, “This place is small huh?” I said as I looked around.

            “It’s so small you don’t yell Fore, you yell three!” Justin laughed at his own lame joke. Jess laughed too, in fact she acted like it was the funniest thing in the world. I just rolled my eyes, at least he found someone to laugh at his stupid jokes, “That was a good one Dallas, come on.”

            “Just hilarious, you’re a comedian.”

            Jess decided she wanted to go first. Justin suggested she let one of us go first so she knows what to do, but she wanted to be first, so she got to be first. She tried to hit the ball, multiple times, and almost knocked herself over. Justin kept giving me looks and I couldn’t stop laughing. I don’t mean to be the asshole that does that but I can’t stop.

            “Maybe you can like… let Justin go first and he can show you how to do it.” I suggested. It’s all fun and games but it’s been like ten minutes and I’m ready to move on.

            Thank God things are getting back to normal with Dallas, I couldn’t take the weird shit anymore. Now I’m standing here trying to keep my cool while Jess looks like she’s hitting a ball that doesn’t exist. I’m failing miserably I can’t stop laughing. It’s Dallas’ fault.

            “OK! I’m done, this is stupid” Jess answered, I’ve never seen her get annoyed, she’s usually happy (too happy).

            “Maybe you should like… wait in the cart,” Dallas suggested. I had to laugh at that one, but they both shot me death glances so I stopped quickly. Jess huffed and puffed and went to the cart. Meanwhile, Dallas laughed to herself and took her shot, she’s too fucking good for her own good, “Go ahead Superstar.”

            I am getting better, it may be slow, but I’m getting it. I just need to play more.  “I don’t think she’s having fun,” I looked back at Jess.

            “Really?” Dallas answered sarcastically, “Take her back to the club, there’s a bar, let her drink away her suckiness.” I laughed at her suggestion, “I’m serious.”

            I nodded my head and walked to the cart, “Not your thing huh?” I asked Jess and got a fifty-word response, “Want to go in to the bar or something?”

            She nodded her head, “I feel bad though. This is really important to you.”

            “No, it’s not a big deal. I don’t mind,” in fact I’d much rather her leave so I can hear myself think.

 I dropped her off and sped back to Dallas.  She clapped, “Well played my friend.”

I shook my head and laughed, I’m probably going on being the biggest asshole but I couldn’t take it. “She does not shut up.”

“I noticed,” Dallas laughed, “I can’t take you serious with that cap.”

“You got it for me.”

“I know, but you seriously look like you should be cleaning people’s clubs. And the little pompom on the top,” she stopped to laugh and I seriously thought she would fall over, “You look sexy J, I like it.”

“It is pretty badass Dallas, I’ll give you that.” I watched her turn red; she definitely said I look sexy. I’ll let it slide though; I’m not going to bring attention to it. Normally I would call her out, but she seems to be real embarrassed she said it so I’m not going to make her feel uncomfortable.

“When is she leaving?”

I laughed at her bluntness, “Tonight, after the show. You don’t like her huh?”

Dallas shrugged, practicing her swing trying to come up with a way to break it to me nicely. I’m not an idiot, I know she’s not to fond of Jess, neither is Rachael, or Marty… or my mother, “She’s fine. She just talks a lot, but so do you so I guess you’re perfect for each other,” she answered with a smirk.

“I do not talk that much.”

“You kinda do,” she laughed, “but hey, as long as you’re happy.”

As long as I’m happy. I’ve heard that a lot in the past few weeks.  As long as I’m happy. Am I happy? I’m happy that I have a girlfriend, mostly because I’m one of those guys that always need to be in a relationship. I know that the relationship seems to go better when we’re on opposite sides of the country. There’s only so much of Jess I can take. That’s never a good sign.

I nodded my head, “So what was up with that guy the other day?”

Dallas laughed and shook her head. I know I’ve brought it up plenty of times but she hasn’t given me a real answer yet. “You’re really concerned about that huh?”

“Yeah, I am,” I answered honestly.

“Why?”

I shrugged, “I don’t like guys fucking with you Dallas.”

“He wasn’t fucking with me,” she answered and rolled her eyes at the look I gave her, “OK. This is exactly what happened so you can stop worrying about me like I’m your little sister.”

“I don’t worry about you like you’re my little sister.”

“You totally do,” she laughed. I do not, there’s more to it than that. I’m not ready to admit to it out loud, but I definitely don’t worry about her like she’s my sister. “I will forever be that girl you have to save when she has too much tequila.”

Not exactly the truth Dallas, but let’s move on. “Stop stalling.”

“OK, fine. I went downstairs and like literally bumped into him. So we started talking and then we went to the bar and got a drink,” I knew he got her drunk, “A drink. Relax.  It was late, so they kicked us out and we went to my room to watch a movie. Fell asleep, the end.”

“That’s it?”

“I’m afraid so. I can’t believe you, of all people, think we had sex. Especially since we’ve slept in the same room how many times? And we’ve had sex how many times? Oh yeah, NONE.”

“That’s different.”

“It’s not really.”

“It definitely is. You’re my best friend, that’s fine. But this is just some random kid you met.  Not your smartest move, Dallas.”

“Yeah, I guess I’m lucky you didn’t find me with a sword through the heart,” she answered sarcastically, “But hey, thanks for thinking I’m a big slut.”

I shook my head, unsure how she could possibly think that’s what was going through my mind. Sure, I thought she may have done something stupid, but I would never think of her as a slut. I know better. I was just a little nervous. “I don’t think that Dallas, I was just worried.”

“Well you don’t have to worry about me. I’m a big girl, I can take care of myself.”

“Yeah, that’s obvious,” I laughed, “So you’re coming to Europe then?”

Dallas shook her head, “I don’t know! Stop asking me every ten minutes.”

“You do know the tour is over in four days, right?” she nodded her head and rolled her eyes, “I mean, really Dallas. I need to know. If I have to go home and audition during my few weeks off and teach some new girl the whole dance I’m going to be really pissed. I shouldn’t make any plans if my whole vacation is going to be ruined,” I smiled.

“Actually, you don’t do that shit, Marty does. So if anyone’s vacation will be ruined it’s his. Plus, I wouldn’t just leave him; I’d help him find someone. Just stop worrying about it. Move on.”

“I just don’t understand why you wouldn’t want to.”

She took a deep breath, “Because I’m sick of you! Is that what you want to hear?” she laughed.

“Not if it’s not true.”

“Oh my god J. it’s not true, please relax and stop worrying about it. I’ll let you know soon.”

“Did you get another offer? I can give you more. Just realize that it’s not always like it seems. A lot of these artists are assholes, they make you put in all this extra time. It won’t be like it is here, it won’t be as laid back and chill.”

Dallas laughed, “I’m not going on another tour. The question is if I want to tour in general, there’s no way in hell I’d want to start over with a totally new obnoxious celebrity. I’m finally learning to deal with this one,” she smiled, “Can you please stop worrying and play golf? You need to focus on your game or we’re going to go back and you’re going to be making all these excuses. I can’t deal with it.”

I am worrying about it. Honestly, it scares the shit out of me. I can’t even think of how much the tour would suck without her. The actual show would suck because no one can move like she does. As for the tour, and traveling around Europe without her, that will probably be unbearable. I don’t even want to think about it.

“Is she going to be pissed?” Dallas spoke, waking me from my thoughts.

“Who?”

She laughed, “Who? Are you serious? Jess.”

“Nah, she’ll be fine, I don’t really care.” I wasn’t about to let Jess ruin my game with all her talking and the fact that she couldn’t even hit the ball one time. We clearly need to start slow with her, like at the driving range, or putt putt. I’m not doing it though; she’d probably talk the whole time so I couldn’t even help her.  I know it sounds horrible, but it’s the truth, I can’t wait for her to go back to LA. I’ve been ignoring more important people on the tour, and there’s only four days late. We all need to spend time together now, because who knows if all of us will be on tour again. Probably not. Too much stress. 

            We just got off stage after the last night of the tour.  The last night. It’s actually really sad, it’s just sinking in now. We just started and now it’s over. I don’t really want it to end; now I’m getting all emotional. I felt an strong, sweaty arm over my shoulder, before feeling Justin’s warm breath whisper in my ear, “Get in the fucking room.” Justin pushed me towards one of the locker rooms.

            There were a couple people already in the room, and people were slowly sprinkling in. I sat down on the edge of a locker, watching everyone carefully. We’re all like a family. It’s so true. We fight like we’re siblings, but in the end we’re best friends. I’m going to miss this.

            “Girl, what was up with you?” I heard Kenny’s voice while he sat down next to me.

            “What?” I asked with a laugh.

            “What? You were all up in my space.”

            “I was not!” I laughed and hit his arm, “get out of my face.”

            Kenny shook his head and stood up, looking down at me before he left, “You coming to Europe?” I didn’t answer him, probably because I’m still not sure. Part of me wants to go, but the other part knows I shouldn’t. I have this weird childhood crush on Justin and I feel

 like I’m setting myself up for failure. He, obviously, doesn’t feel even remotely close to the way I fell and he has a girlfriend. Every time I see her I want to slap her. I feel like it would be smart for me to move on and go home.

            But on the other hand, I wouldn’t mind seeing Europe. Plus I’m really enjoying my experience touring and I’m not quite sure if I’m ready to end it. I know I’ve been acting like I’m not into dancing but seriously; there is no feeling like being out there on stage in front of thousands of screaming people.

            “Alright,” Kenny continued, breaking me from my thoughts, “It’s cool, I’ll wait for the big announcement. Stand up, give me a hug.” I did as I was told, “It’s been fun girl. You got the moves, thanks for schooling us out there every night.” Schooling tends to be the word of the tour. Everyone is always schooling eachother. Honestly, before the tour I’ve never even heard that phrase.

            “Says the guy that tours the country giving lessons.”

            “Ay, you could do it too,” he threw his head down and smiled before moving on to talk to someone else.

            I stayed standing, since it seemed like everyone was making the rounds in search of hugs. Everyone is getting emotional, I don’t really know why. They’re all going to Europe, and then they’ll be together all the time just like they were here for the past few months.

Justin and Marty ran into the room screaming and dumping bottles of Champagne on everyone. I should have known that’s what they wanted everyone in here for. “Ya’ll come get a shot. I’m from the south, you know how we do,” Justin said as he held up a bottle of Jack Daniels.

            Justin handed me a glass before looking up and pulled it away with a smile, “No, I got the good stuff for you.”

            I made a face and he laughed, “You’re never going to give that up are you?”

            He poured extra Jack Daniels in my glass, “Later then, I got it,” he winked before handing me the glass. Why must he do these things to me? I grabbed the glass and rolled my eyes, ready to move out of the way, but he grabbed onto my wrist, “Don’t go too far, stay here.”

            Everybody formed a circle, “Alright, everybody got one?” Justin began, “Ya’ll know I’m going to be the sappy bastard but seriously, thanks to everyone so much for giving your all every night of the show. Ya’ll brought your own thing to the show and it would have sucked without each one of you. We were at each other’s throats for a good part of the tour, but, for real, this has been the best tour I’ve ever had. We schooled America, now we’re off to school Europe!” everyone shouted ‘schooled’ and laughter filled the room. Justin held his drink up and everyone else did the same, “Alright now, seriously, thanks to everyone for working so hard and putting up with my perfectionist ass. Put um up! For the best fucking show anyone’s ever seen!”

            I drank the shot and watched everyone giving hugs. People looked like they were about to cry, I’m not really into all these emotions. I turned around and Justin was gone, where the hell did he go? The rest of the dancers were making their ways back to the bus so we could go back to the hotel and get ready for one last party.

            I walked by Justin’s dressing room and heard him inside getting his things together, “Why are you hiding?”

            Justin laughed, “I’m not, I’m getting my shit together.”

            He looked up at me and his eyes were definitely looking like he was about to cry, “Then why do you look like you’re about to cry?”

            “Shut the fuck up,” he said with a smile, wiping his eyes, “I’m not about to cry, I have allergies.”

            “Yeah, ok” I laughed, “Allergies.”

            “Allergies Dallas, get over it,” he grabbed his bag and put his arm around my shoulder, “Did ya have fun?”

            “Yeah, a lot of fun. Thanks J.”

            These have become the moments I live for on this tour. The time where it’s just Justin and I. There’s no drama and it’s just like it used to be when we started. I’m glad everything made a full circle and we’re back to that.

            I followed Justin into the Escalade waiting to take him back to the hotel since everyone else already left. “So what was up with you chasing me around on stage?”

            Justin laughed, throwing his head back, “You liked that huh?”

            He literally chased after me, like we were playing tag in the middle of the show. The whole show was a lot less professional, being the last one, but he scared the shit out of me. You have no idea what it’s like to be in the middle of dancing and have a man come running straight for you, not even thinking about stopping. I had to run away. And I ended up doing laps around the stage until the song ended and he finally gave up.

            “How do you sing and do that at the same time?” I asked honestly. It doesn’t make sense.

            “It’s called talent Dallas. I didn’t get here on my good looks alone.”

            “Obviously,” I rolled my eyes.

            “You’re coming out right?” I nodded my head, “Good, gotta get some Patron then,” he finished with a crooked smile.

            We walked into the lobby of the hotel and my heart stopped beating when I saw who was standing by the elevator. “Surprise!” Jess shouted, holding her hands up in the air while giggling like a schoolgirl.

            “What are you doing here?” Justin asked, not exactly hiding the shock in his voice. It almost seems like he isn’t excited to see her.

            “I came to surprise you! On your last show! Congratulations!” she clapped her hands together. “Hey Dallas, congratulations!”

            Did she just call me Dallas? Please tell me she did not just call me Dallas. I felt my teeth clench and my hands form fists. I really need to slap this bitch. It’s my last day, I might as well go out with a bang.

            “Easy there, Killer,” Justin whispered in my ear before moving his arm off my shoulder, “I’ll see you over there, ok?”

            I nodded my head and headed towards the elevator. I really hate her.

            Why the fuck is this girl here? Honestly, she just left a few days ago and now she’s back. It’s not like I should be upset that she’s here, but it’s the last night of the tour, I’d like to chill with the people that I’ve been touring with for the past four months. She wrapped her arms around my neck and kissed me gently, “Hey baby.”

            “I thought you were filming.”

            “I have the weekend off,” she smiled, she’s always so damn happy, “I just got in though, I missed the show. I really wish I could have seen in,” she pouted her lips out.

            “You’ve seen it before.”

            “Are you mad I’m here? I probably should have called, but I wanted to surprise you.”

            “No, it’s cool. I just wanted to chill with everyone on the tour tonight.”

            “Oh, well you can still go out. I mean, I don’t even have to come. I don’t mind staying at the hotel. I wanted to see you before you leave for Europe though.”

            Why does she have to be so understanding? Even when I’m a complete asshole and tell her I’d rather spend the night at the bar with my friends she’s ok with it. And she’s still fucking smiling.

            I felt like I had to tell her she can come, “No, of course not Jess, you can come.” but I’m not exactly going to be paying attention to her, that’s for damn sure.

            I jumped in the shower as soon as I got back to my room and realized I still didn’t know if Dallas was coming to Europe or not.  When we got to the club everyone was already partying. I saw Dallas sitting down talking to the girls; they looked like they were getting into some deep conversation. That worries me because they’re usually laughing and fooling around.

            Jess went off somewhere and I didn’t bother looking for her. Instead, I found Dallas and grabbed her with me. “Gosh, just drag me.”

            “I will,” I smiled bringing her to the bar, “I’ll have a Jack and Coke and she’ll have a Tequila Sunrise.”

            I heard Dallas laugh over the music, but she grabbed the drink as soon as it came out. I grabbed her hand again and brought her to the outside area so it would be quiet enough so we could talk and actually hear each other.

            “Where’s Jess?”

            I shrugged. I don’t really care. “Getting a drink I guess.”

            “She just showed up?” I nodded my head, “Didn’t she just leave?”

            I nodded my head again. It’s safe to say I can add Dallas to the list of people that don’t like Jess. “So, you’re coming to Europe, right?”

            Dallas didn’t answer me, but when I looked over at her she was shaking her head.

            “What?”  I shouted, she can’t be serious. My heart started pounding, “Are you serious?”

            “Yeah, calm down.” Why is she acting like this isn’t a big deal?

            “Why the fuck not?” I realize my voice is a lot louder than it should be, but I can’t help it.

            “I just don’t want to dance Justin, it’s not my thing,” she answered calmly.

            “That’s such bullshit. I’m so sick of you pretending you don’t have the time of your life when you’re up there. I see you up there Dallas; you’re not just doing it because you have to. You want to dance, it’s your fucking life.”

            “No, it’s not.  I had fun, don’t get me wrong, and it was cool. Thanks for taking me. But I did it. I gave it a try and I enjoyed it but I want to get going on my career. I’m not a dancer. I just finished school and I want to be able to do what I went to school for.”

            “You do not get that fucking feeling you get when you’re on stage in front of thousands when you’re drawing up a fucking room.”

            “You’re taking it personally,” she answered, still extremely calm. I’m the only one screaming like an idiot.

            “I am taking it personally, of course I’m taking it fucking personally. It’s my fucking tour Dallas. What the fuck do I gotta do? I need you to come on tour.”

            “You don’t need me.”

            “Yeah Dallas, I fucking need you on this tour,” I could feel my eyes getting watery and I can’t believe I’m getting so emotional over it. If I honestly thought that she wasn’t going to come because she didn’t like dancing I’d be fine with it. But it’s a bullshit excuse. There’s more to it, I don’t know exactly what, but it’s all bullshit.

            “You’ll survive Justin. You’ve got plenty of people on the tour that know how to dance.”

            She doesn’t get that there’s more to it than that. There’s so much more to it than that. And if I didn’t have my fucking girlfriend in the other room I would tell her that. I’m having a fucking crisis here. She has to come.

            I looked at Dallas and she looks like she’s about to cry herself. “I’m going to go back to my room, I don’t feel good.” She answered quickly, her voice cracking halfway through. She stood up and wiped her eyes but the tears were already starting to come.

            “Yeah,” I stood up wiping my own eyes, “These fucking allergies are killing me.”

            “I can’t believe you’re leaving,” Rachael said the next morning on the golf course. It’s our last day so of course Justin insisted we all go golfing. I guess this is his last chance to beat me. I am not going to let him win.

            “You’re leaving too Rach, hate to break it to you,” Marty answered with a smile.

            “Shut up, you know what I mean,” she laughed and slapped his arm, “It’s just weird. What am I going to do without you? I’ll be stuck with these two losers by myself.”

            “Rach, you’ll survive, there’s like five hundred other people on the tour.” I don’t understand why it’s such a big deal to everyone.

            “Yeah, but no one will give it right back at them like you do.”

            “I’m sure her replacement will be just as good,” Marty stared me down before giving me a smile, “Or even better.”

            “Probably,” I answered softly.

            “You have to come visit at least. Like if you hate being home you can still come back.”

            “Oh, I don’t know about all that,” Marty answered sarcastically, “What, we’re just going to kick the new girl out?”

            “Yeah, obviously,” Rachael’s getting defensive now, “Like this new girl is going to move like Veda moves.”

            “Shut up, you’re so fucking annoying,” Justin came out of nowhere. He was wasn’t talking, or even listening, or so I thought, “Go, it’s your turn.”

            “Cranky,” Rachael said with a soft smile as she walked away.

            “I’m not cranky, you’re just so fucking annoying. Just shut up and play the game.”

            I heard Marty chuckle as he moved to the side and practiced his swing. Justin is acting pretty cranky. I’m not exactly sure why.

            “What time are you leaving?” Justin asked me quietly.

            “When you are, a little earlier I guess.”

            Justin nodded his head, “Who got your ticket?”

            “Expedia.”

            He looked right at me, “You’re flying coach?”

            I nodded my head and laughed, “Yes superstar, I’m flying coach.”

            “You got all your money right? From the tour?”

            “Yeah.”

            Justin nodded his head, and it’s official this whole thing is getting weird.

            Dallas still kicked my ass. It’s the last chance I had to at least get close but I couldn’t.  My mind wasn’t in the game, that’s the excuse I’m using. I really would have liked to kick her ass at least once while she’s here. Who knows when I’ll see her again… if I’ll see her again. Oh, fuck. I get a sick feeling in the pit of my stomach just thinking about it.

            “Want to get lunch?” I asked her when we got back to the hotel, after Marty and Rachael were already inside. I don’t want us all to go, I just want her to go.

            “I need to pack,” she answered softly. I looked at my watch, we have to leave in an hour, I guess there’s not enough time.

            “Alright,” I nodded my head, “I’ll see you later then.”

            Dallas went to the elevator and I sat down on the couch in the lobby, I took a deep breath and threw my head back, what the fuck am I doing? Why is this bothering me so much? More importantly, why the fuck am I sitting down here in the lobby by myself when we need to go to the airport in an hour and I’m not going to see Dallas for months, if I ever see her again.

            I stood up and went outside, pulling my hat lower on my head and grabbing my sunglasses from my pocket. If someone stops me for an autograph I’m likely to kill them. I noticed a barbeque restaurant down the street and jogged inside.

            “Just one?” the hostess asked.

            I shook my head quickly, “Nah, I just want take-out, do you do take-out?”

            “No sir, we don’t.”

            I took a deep breath, “Can you? I really need you to. Fast, real quick. I’ll give you… mad money, I just really need it, quick.”

            She smiled, as if she understood what I needed it for. I’m sure she just recognized me but whatever, “What can I get you?”

            “Pulled pork, and ribs. And some baked beans and French fries and greens, do you have greens?”

            “Yes sir, anything to drink?”

            “Sweet tea. Two of them.”

            “Sure, I’ll put it right in.”

            “How long?”

            “About ten minutes? Fifteen?”

            “Ten is good,” I answered quickly, my manners are gone, “I’ll be back.”

            I jogged outside; I’m not exactly sure where I’m going.  I ended up finding a store and I bought her some candy and shit for Dallas to have on the plane. I’m an idiot. I need serious help.  By the time I got back to the restaurant the food was ready.

            “Thanks so much,” I said sincerely as I handed her a hundred dollar bill.

            “Oh my god, thank you. Can I get your autograph please? I’m a huge fan, I went to your concert the other night and oh my god, it was amazing.”

            “Thanks sweetheart, sure, but I’m in a rush.” I signed the paper she handed me and thanked her again before I left.

            I ran back to the hotel and caught my breath as I stood in the elevator. I took a deep breath before knocking on Dallas’s room.

            “Hey,” she answered with a slight smile.

            “Hey, I brought food,” I held up the bags.

            “I’m starving, thanks,” she moved in and I followed her, “Are you all packed?”

            I nodded my head.

            “I’m just about done,” she continued looking into the bags, “What’d you get?”

            “Ribs, and barbeque.”

            “Perfect, where’d you find it?”

            “There’s a place down the street.”

            “Thanks J.”

            “Yeah, sure,” I grabbed the containers before realizing that girl didn’t give us any silverware, “No utensils though.”

            Dallas laughed, “Seriously? That’s ok, we’ll manage. I’m starving.” She sat down cross-legged on the bed and I sat with her, placing the food containers around the bed. “Mmm baked beans? How are we going to do that?” she laughed, “Oh, I got it!” she jumped up and went into the bathroom, coming out with two plastic cups, “So gross.”

            I laughed as I grabbed a cup from her hand, “All this for fucking baked beans, they better be good.”

            “They’ll be good, look at them,” she grabbed a rib, “Oh my god, so good.”

            I handed her a cup of baked beans and grabbed a rib myself. It is amazing, almost like I’m back home. She started laughing uncontrollably, making me laugh as well, “What?”

            “This is like one of those things I’m going to remember forever. Touring with Justin Timberlake, world famous, sitting on my bed eating pulled pork with my fingers and baked beans from a cup.”  The laughter turned to tears, then she caught herself and it became some kind of a mixture.

            “Don’t say it like that.”

            “Like what?”

            “World famous Justin Timberlake,” I mimicked, “It’s not like that.”

            “I know. I’m going to miss you Justin,” she said in a whisper.

            I nodded my head and felt my own eyes start to water, “Then don’t leave.”

            “Ridiculous,” she wiped her eyes and laughed, trying to hide the fact that she was crying and pretending like she didn’t hear what I said, “So ridiculous. Ahh,” she took a deep breath, “I’m ok.”

            I nodded my head. She’s not ok. I’m not ok.

            “Thanks for lunch, it’s really good.” I nodded my head again; I need to figure out what the fuck I’m doing, “Do you have to get your bags?”

            “No, I already put them down.”

            She nodded her head, “We should probably head down.”

            I think this is honestly the worst day of my life. I’ve never had such a hard time saying good-bye to people, and I’ve only known them all a couple months. It wasn’t even this bad after college, and I knew most of them for four years.

            When we got to the airport I felt like I was going to throw up. I can’t believe it’s over. We made it through security and I had to get to my gate while everyone else had to go through the extra security to get to international travel.

            I made my way around saying goodbye to everyone. There were only three of them that it was real difficult to say goodbye to. I’ll miss everyone but the four of us were extra close before the tour even started.

            “God Vay, I can’t believe you’re not coming,” Rachael hugged me tightly. We’ve gotten really close while on this tour, and it’s killing me that I’m not going to be able to walk down the hall to her room when I’m having an issue. “You better keep in touch and call me once in a while. And when we get back we’re getting together again. I’m going to miss you, hoe.”

            “I’ll miss you too. Have fun.” I hugged her one more time and then moved on to Marty. He was standing with a smile, his arms crossed over his chest, “Marty,” I called out.

            “Veda,” he hugged me tightly, “Call me if you change your mind.”

            I nodded my head, “Thanks for making me do this,” here comes that whole laughing and crying thing at the same time, “Seriously Marty,”

            “I know,” he nodded his head, “Tell your parents I said hi. And Audrey, have fun with that,” I laughed and wiped my eyes, “Good luck, I’ll see you soon.”

            “K, thanks,” I elbowed him in the side and he grabbed my arm and twisted, “OK, I give.”

            He laughed and pulled me into one last hug, “Bye Vay.”

            I waved goodbye and then stood in front of Justin. I’m crying already. “I’ll walk you over,” Justin said softly.  I nodded my head and waved to everyone as we made our way to my gate.

            Neither of us said anything, but I had to sit down because I felt like I was going to fall over. Justin sat down next to me, neither of us able to speak. This shouldn’t be this hard. I shouldn’t be so upset. It’s my choice; I’m the one making the decision that I don’t want to go.

            “Isn’t your car in LA?” Justin spoke. I nodded my head, “But you’re going to Dallas? So what, you’re just going to go home without a car?”

            “I guess I’ll just use my parents, I haven’t really thought about it.”

            He leaned forward and ran his hands through his hair, “I just don’t get it Dallas, I don’t get why you’re not coming.”

            I wiped my eyes, I really wish I could stop crying, “I just need to go home for a little.”

            Justin took a deep breath and leaned back in his seat, “It’s only a couple months. It’s not too late to change your mind.”

            I don’t understand why he’s taking it so personally. “I don’t want to.”

            Why doesn’t she want to? Why the fuck is she fine with leaving on that plane and going back to Dallas? If she was fine with it and she wanted to go back home then she wouldn’t be crying like she is. It doesn’t make any sense. None of this shit makes sense.

            The announcement came over the speakers that it was her last boarding call. She stood up, and I stood up quickly, “I got you some stuff,” I handed her the bag.

            “Thanks,” she said softly and stuffed it into her backpack, “You didn’t have to…”

            “I know,” I broke in, “Have a safe flight,” I heard my voice crack as I spoke. God, I need to be a man and stop this bullshit. She’s leaving, that’s it.

            “Can I get a hug quick?” She asked and fell into my arms before I could answer. Now she’s really crying, harder than she was before. I rubbed her back as if to comfort her, but I need some fucking comforting me. “Thanks so much J, for everything. This has been an amazing opportunity,” she paused to catch her breath and tried to compose herself enough to continue, “Seriously. I had so much fun, and I’ll remember everything forever. We’ve been through a lot kid.”

            “Then don’t go,” I said again before catching my breath. It doesn’t have to be the end. I held onto her longer than I should have, but she wasn’t letting go either.

            Dallas ignored what I said; again, “You’re a good kid, even though sometimes you’re a cocky bastard and a shitty golf player,” she finished with a laugh.

            “Yeah, alright,” I laughed, “I’m still going to kick your ass someday. You’re going to be surprised.”

            “I hope so,” she smiled and pulled away from me, “Have fun in Europe, school them.”

            I nodded my head; “Call me when you get home.”

            “You’re going to be on the plane.”

            “I got airplane mode.”

            She nodded her head, “Bye Justin.”

            “Later Dallas.”

            I watched her walk away; she waved before going through the terminal. I sat down and took a deep breath. What the fuck am I doing? How the fuck am I letting her just go back home? What is wrong with me that I can’t swallow my fucking pride for a minute and tell her how I really feel? I stood up and jogged to the terminal, pulling at the closed door.

            “Sir”

            “Dude, I need to get on that fucking plane.”

            “They’re taking off sir,” the man answered softly and I took a deep breath. I slid down to the ground because I can’t stand anymore. Is she really gone? She can’t really be gone. What the fuck am I going to do? “Can I book you another flight?”

            I shook my head and pulled my hood over my face and my sunglasses down. I had to wait a few minutes to compose myself before I went back to everyone else. I’ve gone fucking crazy.

            I took a deep breath before standing up and walking back to everyone. Luckily, it was a little ways away so I had some time to check my shit. When I got back, most of the dancers were sitting on the ground in a circle playing some dirty game I’m sure. Marty was sitting in one of the uncomfortable chairs all by himself. He looked at me when I sat down next to him, “You alright man?”

            I nodded my head even though it’s pretty obvious I’m not.

            “You’ll see her again, when we get back.”

            I nodded my head again, still unable to talk.  Rachael came over and grabbed onto my arms, pulling me up, “Come with me.” I stood up and followed her through the airport. “I don’t know why you didn’t just tell her.”

            “Rach, shut up.” I can’t deal with her shit right now.

            “I’m just saying you should have told her.”

            “And I’m telling you to shut the fuck up.”

            She didn’t have a smart remark, instead she pulled me into a tight hug, “I’m going to miss her too.”

            I shook my head and pulled my glasses up so I could wipe my eyes. “Come on, we’re boarding.”

            After what felt like the longest plane ride in history I finally stepped off the plane and into Dallas. I walked through the airport like a zombie, not exactly sure how I should be feeling. To my surprise, as soon as I got past security my father was standing there smiling. I pretty much ran into his arms and started bawling as soon as I got there. There’s really no reason for me to be crying, but I’ve been crying just about the whole plane ride here, not to mention the past two days, that I feel like this is just another excuse to cry.

            “Hey Lady Bug. Welcome home.”

            I held onto him tightly and laughed to hide the tears. Luckily my father talked the whole ride home, not exactly giving me a chance to speak, so I was able to get myself together before my mother saw me.

            After seeing my mother and sister I managed to head up to my room alone. I did have to tell them I was a little sick from the plane ride. They seemed to buy it, so I fell onto my bed trying to figure out what the hell I was doing. I don’t know why I feel like something’s missing. It’s obvious Justin doesn’t care about me that way. He has a girlfriend, first of all, and he didn’t really care that I wasn’t going. He would have told me if he felt something.

            “Are you sleeping?” I heard Audrey’s voice and quickly closed my eyes. I’m going to pretend I’m sleeping so she’ll go away. I just got home. This is not good. “Veda! Are you up?”

            “I am now,” I answered softly and turned around to face her, “What’s up Audrey?”

            “I missed you! Welcome home!” I sat up and forced a smile as she sat down on the bed and hugged me.

            “Yeah, thanks I missed you too. It’s good to be home. I’m really tired though, I was going to take a quick nap.”

            “Oh, ok, I’ll let you sleep. Do you think that um, you’re going to see Justin again?” here we go.

            “I don’t know Audrey, maybe.”

            “I just was wondering if like he has a new video do you think you’d be in it?”

            “I’m not sure, I’m just really tired,” there better not be these questions the whole time I’m here. I will not be able to deal with it.

            “Alright, I’ll let you sleep. Did you take any pictures? I want to see them.”

            I took a deep breath, “I didn’t Audrey. Please let me sleep and we can talk about it tomorrow.”

            “OK, gosh. You don’t have to be so cranky.”

            Just leave me alone. This is so not going to be something I can deal with. I need a lock on the door.

            When we landed in London it was 9am. I hate overnight flights because I can never get comfortable enough to sleep. Not that I should be complaining, I was in upper class far above everyone else in coach, and my chair went all the way back to a bed. I should have switched with someone though; I knew I wouldn’t get any sleep.

            There’s still that feeling in the pit of my stomach, the feeling telling my I really fucked up. I should have gotten over my pride and just told Dallas that she had to come, not because of the tour but because I want her to come. I can’t even think about what it’s going to be like being away from her for two months. I have fucking issues.

            As I stepped off the plane I met up with Rachael who looks abnormally wide awake. “You look like death,” she laughed when she saw me.

            “I couldn’t sleep. I’m tired and hungry. Please tell me we don’t have to do shit today.”

            “We don’t just tonight. You can sleep as soon as we get to the hotel.”

            I hate London because there are so many fucking people screaming and taking pictures. It seems like it’s worse here than anywhere else, although that may have something to do with the fact I just got off a plane and haven’t slept in what seems like days. Then there’s the whole Dallas thing adding more fuel to the fire.

            Speaking of Dallas, she didn’t call me. I’ll call her when I get in my room so I don’t have to deal with Rachael’s assumptions. I can’t believe before we got on the plane Rach had the audacity to say I should have just told her. What the fuck? How does she know what I should have told Dallas? She doesn’t know. How could she fucking know? I don’t even know.

            I fell right in the bed the second I got to my room. I walked right past the tray of fruit and Danish, fuck it I’m more tired than I am hungry, that’ll be there when I wake up. I grabbed my phone to call Dallas before I fall asleep.

            She answered it after five rings, I was getting worried something had actually happened, “Hello?” She sounds like she’s sleeping, shit I forgot the time differences.

            “Hey, you didn’t call me.”

            “Oh, I forgot, sorry.”

            “It’s ok, sorry to wake you up. I just wanted to make sure you made it home.”

            “I did, thanks. How’s London?"

            “Cold and overcast, same as always,” she laughed and the sound made me smile, “How’s Texas?”

            “Dark,” she paused to yawn, “Lots of stars.”

            “Go back to sleep.”

            “No, it’s ok. I’m up now. Is there a show tonight?”

            “No, tomorrow. I have to go to some dinner tonight.”

            “Sounds like fun, at least they talk cool.”

            “Yeah,” I laughed, “What are your plans? Starting the job hunt?”

            “Yeah, I guess at some point. Did you sleep on the plane?”

            “Nah, not for a minute,” I yawned but somehow talking to her wakes me up.

            “That sucks. Go to sleep, tell everyone I said hi.”

            “I will, call me sometime. Don’t loose touch.”

            “Alright. Bye Justin, goodnight.”

            “Sweet dreams.”

            Come to London. Fuck, we just left not even a day ago and I’m already missing her. That’s fucked up. It’s also fucked up that every time I go on a plane the first thing I do is call my mother. I didn’t even call my mother yet and I called fucking Dallas. What does that say?

            “Are you up? Veda, are you awake?”

            I opened my eyes slowly to see the clock, it’s 9:30, I’m up now.

            “Veda, are you awake?” Audrey kept talking; I swear I’m going to kill her if she keeps this up.

            “Yes Audrey, I’m up. Good Morning, what can I do for you?” I sat up in bed to see she wasn’t alone; she was joined by three of her friends. “Hi,” I said softly, why do I always wake up with an audience watching me?

            “Hi. Did you really go on tour with Justin Timberlake?” the tall brunette asked. I should know their names but they are escaping me right now.

            “What’s he like? Is he as hot in person as he is in magazines?” the short blonde with glasses spoke.

            “Hotter actually,” I answered with a laugh, remembering what he told me to say if that question came up.

            “He is, he’s totally hotter,” Audrey began, “He invited me back to his hotel, didn’t he Veda?”

            “To go swimming Audrey, don’t say it like that. You’re going to get him in trouble, you’re underage.”

            “Whatever, I saw him half naked.”

            “In his bathing suit,” I corrected her, she’s crazy. “I’m going to go get some breakfast, see you guys later.”

            I have a feeling we’re going to be talking about Justin all day every day the whole time I’m home.  I came home so I could be away from him and she’s not making it very easy. My mother was standing by the stove making oatmeal so when I sat down on the counter, “Morning Momma.”

            “Good Morning sweetie, are you well rested?”

            I nodded my head, “I’d be better rested if Audrey didn’t come in and wake me up with her friends. Seriously, I can’t deal with all the questions.”

            My mother laughed, “She’s just excited that you’re home.”

            “No she’s not. She’s just excited because OMG her sister came back from touring with Justin OMG Timberlake.”

            She smiled and handed me a bowl of oatmeal, “How are you doing?”

            “Fine.”

            “Fine? Do you want to talk about it?”

            I stuffed a spoonful in my mouth to give me a minute before answering, “Talk about what?” I decided to play dumb.

            “Veda, sweetie, you’re acting like a girl that’s got her heart broken.”

            I almost choked on my oatmeal, “My heart is not broken.”

            “OK,” she nodded her head, “Why didn’t you go to Europe?”

            “I just didn’t want to, why is it such a big deal? I’m not a dancer; I don’t want dancing to be my life. I want to design, I just finished school and I haven’t even done anything with it yet.”

            “Alright sweetie, calm down. I’m just saying it’s only a few months, it’s not like you to quit.”

            “I didn’t quit, it’s a different tour,” I know I’m getting really defensive and it’s not helping the cause. If she was questioning it before, now she knows for sure “I don’t get why it’s such a big deal with everyone.”

“I’m sorry hunny, I just thought you loved touring.”

“I did, but I wanted to come home, I needed a break.”

“Did you tell him how you feel?”

I looked away from my mother because I felt myself about to cry. How does she know everything? Why did she ask me that? “I don’t know what you’re talking about,” I whispered the lie.

“Maybe he needs to hear it. Maybe he feels the same way.”

“He has a girlfriend,” I reminded her.

I was pulled into a hug before my mother spoke again, “It’ll work out hunny. It always does.”

I wiped my eyes before pulling away from her. I wasn’t crying my eyes were just getting a little watery. “I’m going back to bed.”

            As the days passes life in Europe was getting more and more annoying. I have absolutely no idea what I’m supposed to be doing when I’m not working. Everything is so boring. Without Dallas here, I feel like there’s nothing to do. I have no one to play Wii with, no one to watch movies with, it’s like I’m all alone out here. It sucks.

            I paced around the stage at the venue for the first show. We had a couple days off before we start. Marty’s been spending the days off training this new girl and now I’m here for the first time trying to see how she moves.

            The stage is smaller because the venues over here are smaller. I fucking hate that. It’s like everything is scaled down and it’s not as good as it was back home. In reality, I know it’s not much of a difference but I’m used to it being bigger and I hate having to change everything.

            Running through the show for the first time without Dallas was weird. I don’t like it. The new girl is shorter than Dallas, so at least I don’t have to worry about putting my arm up so high during the song that I had all those issues with. That’s the only good thing about this girl being here, and I’d rather strain my arm out every day if Dallas could come back. There’s just something about this new girl I don’t like, although it’s probably just because she’s here and Dallas isn’t. I shouldn’t hold it against her; it’s obviously not her fault.

            I know I’ve been quiet the past few days. It sucks and I should be able more outgoing and shit but honestly I just want to go crawl in my bed, pull the covers over my head and sleep this whole tour away. Either that or fly to Dallas and drag her on the fucking plane with me. I’m not above that.

            This girl doesn’t even know what she’s doing. She’s literally bumping into people. And now she’s on the ground, screaming, and holding her ankle.

 Fan-fucking-tastic.

“You do know you’ve been in bed for like the past week,” of course it’s Audrey; I swear to god I’m going to kill her.

“You do know you’ve been waking me up every day for like, the past week.”

“Yeah, cause you’re like dead to the world.”

“I’m really tired. And maybe if you didn’t wake me up every day I’d get a good nights sleep and I wouldn’t be sleeping, like, every day” I mimicked.

She took a deep breath, “You’re so boring.”

“You’re so annoying.” I know I’m being so mature.

“Do you miss seeing Justin every day?”

Oh God, help me. “Would you stop?” I screamed, “I swear to GOD Audrey, every fucking day! You ask me about him twenty times a fucking day. Would you get over it? You’re a stalker do you get that? He’s too old for you; he’s not interested in going to jail. And even if you were older, he still wouldn’t be interested because he has a fucking girlfriend. I was on tour with him, I’m not anymore, and it’s over. It’s done. You’re probably never going to see him again, get over it. I swear to god Audrey, every fucking day!”

“God, chill. I just asked a simple question.”

“You ask the same simple question a hundred times a day. Leave me alone, get out of my fucking room.”

My cell phone rang and I took a deep breath to calm myself before answering it, “Is it him? Do you think it’s him? Have you talked to him since you got home? Does he call you?”

“You’ve got to be fucking kidding me! Get the fuck out! MOM!!!!!!”

“Alright, alright, I’m going, chill.”

I saw Marty’s number on the caller ID and took a few quick deep breaths. Why did I come home? “Help me.” I answered.

Marty laughed, “Help me. What’s the problem?”

“Audrey is driving me up the fucking wall. I’m going to kill her. I can’t stay here.”

“You still have the key to my place right? Go back to LA for a little.”

“And do what? Everyone I know is in Europe.”

“That works out incredibly well actually.”

“What?”

“We need help Vay, serious help.”

I fell back on the bed and took a deep breath, “What kind of help?”

“The girl that took your spot, number one, can’t dance,” he laughed, “She couldn’t dance from the beginning but now she really can’t dance.”

OK, I’ll bite. “Why can’t she dance?”

“She fell during rehearsals and broke her fucking ankle,” he laughed, “It’s not funny, we’re stuck. We need you Vay, get on the next flight and get your ass over here and help us school Europe.”

“Like it’s broken?”

“Yeah, broken. She’s going back home. We’re stuck.”

“You have backup dancers,” I reminded him.

“That suck,” he reminded me, “Are you really going to make me beg? Audrey is driving you crazy and you know you want to go to fucking Europe. Plus, we need your help with Justin. He’s driving everyone crazy, acting all depressed and shit.”

“He probably misses his girlfriend.”

“Yeah, that’s probably it,” he answered sarcastically with a laugh, “You guys are so fucking stupid it’s unbelievable, but whatever, I don’t care. It’s your life, be fucking stupid. Just come to Europe. Please Veda, we seriously need you to come.”

“I don’t know Marty.” I still feel the same way about going. Sure, I want to go to Europe, but how can I? So, say I do go, and then I’m there with Justin and fucking Jess? I can’t do that. But I can’t take Audrey either. There’s no winning.  “I need to think about it, I’ll call you back, ok?”

“Yeah, hurry up though, if you’re coming you need to get here soon.”

            “Hello?” I answered the phone softly, I’ve been ignoring her calls long enough, it’s about time I man up and actually talk to her. How is it possible for her to annoy me so much when I’m on the other side of the world? It’s possible, only for Jess it’s possible.

            I don’t even know exactly why she annoys me.  She’s probably one of the nicest girls I’ve ever met. I think that’s it, she’s too nice. She’s always doing everything to please everyone else. I need a girl that knows what she wants. I like to fight, life is boring if everything always goes as planned. Sometimes I just need to yell, and I need a girl that will yell right back at me. Jess is not that girl.

            “Hey baby!” she answers way too bubbly, “I’ve been trying to call you for days, how have you been?”

            “Yeah, my bad. I’ve been busy, plus with the time difference,” I cut myself off mid sentence, “So look, can we talk for a minute?”

            “Yeah baby, that’s why I called, to talk. Tell me about everything. How’s everything going? Did your first show go alright?”

            Oh dear god shut the fuck up. All she does is talk; I don’t get a fucking second to say anything. “Yeah, I guess everything’s fine. One of the dancers broke her foot, but besides that,” she’s still talking but I figure she doesn’t listen anyway so I might as well get it out and speed this whole thing along.

            “Oh no! Is she all right? Who is it?”

            “The new girl, I don’t even know her name.” I stopped talking but she continued, I can’t do this anymore. “Can you shut up for two seconds and listen to me?” I shouted. Probably should not have done that.

            “Yeah J, gosh sorry. I just haven’t talked to you in so long, I miss you.”

            “Yeah, about that. I can’t uh… look Jess, it’s not working out. You’re a nice girl and everything but I’m… going to be in Europe for awhile and I’ve got so much shit going on I don’t really have much time to talk to you and…” yeah, this is going great, “We’re done, alright? It’s not working, it’s been fun. Don’t call me anymore.”

            Hey, I never said I was good at break ups. I can’t take it anymore though; even when I’m here and she’s there it’s still annoying the fuck out of me. And yes, I did just hang up on her without waiting for a reply. Talk about a wuss.

            I don’t know what I’m doing. I have absolutely no idea why I am currently sitting on a plane that just landed in London as we taxi to the gate.  The whole idea of me not going to Europe clearly didn’t work out as planned. I wasn’t going because of Justin, and guess what? It’s still the same situation with him. Talk about stupid.

            I guess I’m here because of Marty, I know how stressed he is and that really sucks that the new girl is hurt already. And, of course, I don’t want Justin’s show to suck.  Not even to mention Audrey is already driving me close to insanity.

            Finally I got off the plane and got past customs to see Marty and Rachael waving. I didn’t think I’d be this excited to see them, but hell, I fell like I haven’t seen them in years. “Hi! Hi, hi hi! What’s up?” I practically ran into Rachael’s arms. I really missed this girl. It seriously is like I’ve known her my whole life.

            “Thank god you’re here Vay, fuck, I feel like I haven’t seen you in years!”

            “I missed you!” I hugged her one more time before moving on to Marty, “What’s up Marty?”

            “You made it, how was the flight?”

            “Fine. Give me a hug jerk, I missed you too.”           

            “I know someone you missed more,” he offered in a singsong, enough for me to elbow him in the ribs. Rachael seemed to find it funny, I’m not above elbowing her as well. It’s weird with Marty; I’ve known him my whole life. But he’s been in LA for years now, so I haven’t seen him that much besides holidays. After being on tour with him for the past few months, and even when he let me crash on his couch when I first went up to LA, it’s like things went right back to the way they were when we were kids. It’s just like he’s my older brother. In just about every way I would imagine an annoying older brother is.

            “Is the show tonight?”

            “Yeah,” Marty nodded his head, “Tonight. You ready?”

            “Of course, it hasn’t been that long. What going on with everyone today?”

            “He’s at the hotel, if that’s what you mean by everyone” Rachael answered with a smile.

            I rolled my eyes and followed them to the baggage pick up, “No, that’s not what I mean by everyone.”

            When we finally got to the hotel everything was really chaotic. I dropped off my bags and had literally about three minutes to wash my face and brush my teeth before it was time to go to the venue. I just want to see Justin, but I can’t act like I do, so instead I’m just following Marty around, doing whatever he said to do.

            We walked into the venue and Justin was on the stage talking to the band. He had a microphone in his hand, in the middle of sound check, and walked around the stage as he checked the microphones. I know I smiled when I saw him. I tried to hide it, but Marty saw it and laughed.  When Justin saw me he stopped in his tracks and just looked at me. It’s hard to tell if he’s happy or pissed, he’s not really moving. Now he’s staring, and wiping his eyes as if he were in the middle of a dream.

            Is this a joke?

            Have I really gone that crazy that I can see Dallas standing mere feet away from me when she’s on the other side of the world? I wiped my eyes again, like an idiot, to see if she was still there when I was done.

            She is.

            And now she’s waving.

            I wish I were calm and collect, but fuck that shit. I ran over to the edge of the stage and jumped down. “What the fuck are you doing here?”

            Well, on the plus side, I didn’t want to sound like I missed her too much. But that came across like I wasn’t excited at all, more like I was upset she’s here.

            “Well gosh Justin, nice to see you too.”

            I pulled her into a hug before I could stop myself and didn’t let go. I’m not really planning on letting go, I need to take it all in.

            The sound of her laughing made me realize I was probably hugging her a little too long, “What’s up Dallas?” I asked with a smile when I finally pulled away.

            She’s smiling too, I’m sure we both look like idiots but I don’t even care, “Hey. Marty called me and told me the situation so I couldn’t let ya’ll down. So here I am.”

            “For the whole tour?” she nodded her head. Shit. I feel like I just got my deal all over again. “Let’s get lunch, you hungry?”

            I didn’t really wait for her to answer. I found myself grabbing onto her arm and pulling her away with me. Everyone’s looking at us, I don’t give a fuck. I missed this girl and I don’t want to share.  We went through the line quickly then made it to my dressing room. I sat down next to her and took a deep breath. She just smiled, “So how was Dallas?”

            “Fine. Boring.”

            I nodded my head; “Tell me about it, this place is so fucking boring. I have nothing to do when I’m not working. I’m glad you’re here, it won’t be boring anymore,” I continued quickly because I can’t believe I just admitted that, “Do you remember the show?”

            “Yes, it’s only been like a week.”

            “Five days,” I corrected her.

            “Really? That’s it? It seems longer.”

I nodded my head in agreement. “Been golfing?”

She laughed, “No. Just once. How about you?”

“Not yet. Just once? It’s been five days Dallas.”

“I know, but I thought you’d be practicing. I was getting worried.”

“Yeah, I’m sure,” I answered with a chuckle, “How was your flight? Alright?”

“Yeah,” she nodded her head and leaned against me. It’s comfortable, natural even. I want to put my arm around her my I feel like that’s not a good move. “I’m tired.”

“Well wake the fuck up, we go on in a couple hours.”

            Things are like awkward now. I don’t want things to be awkward. He has a fucking girlfriend Veda get off his fucking shoulder. What is wrong with me? I sat up and grabbed a piece of bread to get away from the situation.

            “I have to go do an interview. I’ll see you later?”

            I nodded my head and fell to the couch as soon as he left. I should not have come here. We’re back to the bullshit and I’m back to just sitting on the sidelines. I can’t do it.  “UGHHH!”

            “UGH!” I heard Justin laugh, “What’s the problem Dallas?”

            I sat up quickly, “I’m just tired,” I lied.

            “Yeah. Forgot my phone,” he held it up with a smile, “Take a twenty minute power nap. I’ll wake you up when I’m done with the interview. Go ahead,” he laughed as he walked out of the room, after mimicking my “UGH” one more time.

            Sometimes I want to punch him. But I am tired; maybe a quick nap will calm me down a little. I’m thinking too much. It’s just Justin, I need to chill with it.

****

            “Dallas,” I heard his voice but chose to ignore it, “Dallas, wake up. Dallas.”

            I felt his hands on my stomach and opened my eyes before sitting up quickly. Justin laughed, “You always wake up in a completely different world. You’re a weird sleeper.”

            “I am not,” I slapped his arm, “How was the interview?”

            “Amazing, like always,” he answered sarcastically. “We have to get ready, it’s almost 7.”

            “Not uh, is it really?”

            “It is, really. You slept for a long time. Now wake the fuck up and get ready. Don’t fuck up my show,” he answered with a half smile.

            “Oh, that was like the whole plan,” I said sarcastically, “That’s what I came all the way here for, now what am I going to do?”

            He laughed and put an arm on either of my shoulders before pushing me into the dressing room. I’m getting like knots in my stomach when he touches me. What the hell is wrong with me? This needs to stop.

            It felt so good to be on that stage again. I guess Justin was right I do love dancing. I didn’t realize how much until I was out there again. It’s the best feeling in the world. The stage is smaller and there are not as many people, but honestly I think I might like it more. It’s kind of cool to be able to actually see people and get their reactions.

            It might have just been in my head, but I swear when I danced with Justin is was more than it usually is. I mean more like his hands were wondering a little more than they usually are. It’s probably in my head because I’m so fucked up as far as can be with him. I need to get over it and just talk to him. I’ve never been shy; I’ve always been able to say what’s on my mind. But there’s something about what I’m about to tell him that makes me become this crazy shy baby.

            After the show I walked with him through the hotel. Neither of us is really talking, I don’t know why. He usually never shuts up.

“Can I just talk to you for a minute?”

            “Yeah, what’s up?” I took a deep breath and followed him into his room.  I can’t believe I’m going to do this.

            “I just… I know you’re like stuck in a hard place. And I know that Jess is beautiful, like gorgeous, and she laughs at your stupid jokes and she’s bubbly and I know you like that. But I’m real, and you’re a good person and I care about you. If I really thought that she was good for you then I’d be ok with it because I want you to be happy. But I really don’t think you’ll be happy with her, I really don’t.  She’s one of those girls that will fuck you up Justin, and you’re already fucked up enough you don’t need her to fuck you up anymore.” I’m crying, and he’s laughing. This isn’t going as planned, “I just… I know I’m not perfect like she is but I’ll go golfing with you and I can hit the fucking ball. And I don’t talk so much that you can’t even concentrate on your game.  And I’ll go to basketball games and actually like it and know what’s going on and she won’t. And I love you,” I finished softly, afraid to look at him and see his reaction, “You know how hard it is for me to say that but I do. I really do. I’m telling you this now because…” I paused, “I don’t know why, it’s just been bothering me. It’s why I didn’t come out here in the first place because I can’t just like sit back and watch you with her anymore. But I want you to do what you want and if you don’t pick me I’ll go back home and you’ll never have to see me again. I just had to put it out there. But I really want you to pick me Justin, please pick me.”

            He didn’t answer me fast enough. So that must mean no, obviously he’s not going to pick me when he can have the perfect girl. I walked to the door, “Wait a minute Dallas, you’re just going to leave?”

            “I don’t want things to be weird,” I turned around.

            “It’s not weird, you just said all that shit and now you’re just going to walk away?”

            I nodded my head but he closed the door, walking closer to me, backing me against the door. “I don’t know. Sorry.”

            Justin laughed again, “Why are you crying?”

            “I don’t know, sorry. Why are you laughing?”

            “It’s funny,” he laughed. I’m glad this is a joke to him. “Alright, sorry. Can you stop crying? I don’t know why you’re crying.”

            “Sorry,” I felt his thumbs brush under my eyes wiping the tears away.

            “Stop apologizing.”

            “Then say something! God, tell me to leave, or do something. Why are you just standing here laughing after I just told you-“ I felt his lips on mine before I could finish talking. Oh my god. Thank god I was already leaning against the door because I felt my knees go weak. His lips are so soft and he tastes so good, this is the best kiss I’ve ever had in my life.

Then he started laughing again, mid kiss and pulled away.  “I’ve wanted to do that since that first night, when we were watching that movie at my house and you fell asleep.”

“What?” I threw my hands up and he continued laughing, “What the hell? All that time? And I’m here like freaking out because I think something’s wrong with me.”

“There is something wrong with you, but it doesn’t have anything to do with me Dallas,” he gave me a sexy smile and I pressed my lips into his. His hands ran through my hair, pulling my face closer to his and I felt his tongue slide into my mouth.

“Wait, wait,” I pushed him away, “What about Jess?”

“What about her?” he asked before kissing my neck.

“Justin,” I laughed, “you can’t just…”

He laughed, like he’s been laughing the whole night, “I’m fucking with you, relax. It’s over, I ended it a few days ago.”

His lips were back on mine before I could answer, but I was more excited than I ever thought I could be. Before I knew it I fell to the bed with Justin on top of me. He removed his lips from mine and laughed, “Are you crying again?”

“Shut up,” I slapped his shoulder, “That was stressful, I didn’t see you making the first step, being a man.”

He won’t stop laughing. “Come on now Dallas. I love you too. I pick you. Does that make you feel better?”

“Yes,” now I’m laughing and crying at the same time.

“Good, now stop crying,” he laughed.

“Stop laughing,” I said as I pulled his shirt over his head.

“Oh, we’re playing it like that huh?” he smiled as I raised my arms above my head so he could pull my shirt off.  “Seriously, you need to stop crying, it’s getting weird.”

“I’m not even crying, shut up,” I laughed as I lifted my ass so he could pull my pants down. He kissed above my panties as he pushed them down my body. And I’m seriously about to come already.

Justin laughed as I moaned, “I hardly even touched you.”

“Seriously, shut up,” I laughed, turning red, “It’s been a long time.”

“I see that,” he gave me that sexy smile that makes me ready to beg for him to just get to it, “Hey, I’m not complaining. You make my job a lot easier.”

I laughed as he pulled his pants down before kissing my legs again. I really feel like I’m going to explode, “You know I really don’t need the foreplay right now.”

He threw his head back as he laughed and crawled on top of me, “Whatever you want Dallas.”

“I just want to… do it.”

“You just want to do it,” he answered with a chuckle, “Then let’s do it.”

I felt him at my opening and felt my whole body ready to give in already. I need to get myself together.

“I’ll go slow,” he whispered,

“I don’t really want you to go slow. I just want you go fuck me.”

Here comes that chuckle again, “Damn, where’s this girl been hiding the whole tour?”

“Justin,” I put a hand on either side of his face and pulled him so he was an inch away from mine, “Shut. Up.”

He smiled for a half a second before attaching his lips to mine as he slid inside of me.  “Shit, you’re tight baby.”

“No shit, I haven’t had sex in over a year, I’m probably reverginized by now. Is that a word? Oh god,” I swear I’m coming after he’s been inside me for less than a second. But oh god, it feels so good and he’s not slowing down for a second.

“Shut up Dallas,” he answered softly before attaching his lips to my neck.

I felt my body tense up and I’m breathing faster, Justin continued working it like only he can. There is definitely something to be said about dancers. Just watching him on stage makes me ready to cum, but fuck I couldn’t even imagine how good he is in bed.

I bit at my lip, trying to hold my second orgasm in a little longer when Justin moved his head away from my neck and looked into my eyes. He let out a quick chuckle, “Doing alright there, Dallas?”

I nodded my head.

“Let it out baby, I’ll be right behind you.”

I hardly waited for him to finish talking before I was screaming his name. I have never felt it like this, ever. Justin called out my name, along with a few obsanities and kissed my lips one more time before I felt him cum inside me.

He stayed inside of me for a few seconds and I felt him soften up before he slid out. Justin lay on his back and pulled me so I resting my head against his chest, both of our breaths to the same beat.

“You have the best face when you’re about to come,” Justin said with a chuckle.

“Shut up.”

“I’m giving you a compliment, god. It’s hot.”

“Oh. Thank you,” I smiled as I traced his shoulders with my finger.

He pulled me now so I was on top of him completely, “Thanks for coming out here Dallas.”

“Thanks for showing me what the big deal is with sex,” I tried to answer seriously but found myself giggling after a second of speaking.

Justin laughed as he flipped me over so he was now on top of me, “Any time Dallas, that’s one thing I can help you with anytime.”

“I’m sure,” I’m still giggling like a twelve year old. I wish I could stop.

“Thanks for jumping for me.”

What is he talking about? “What? You say these things that make sense only in your head and not to anyone else.”

“Thanks for taking the chance, for putting it all out there.”

“Oh, well yeah. I kinda had to since it didn’t seem like you were ever going to.”

He laughed and ran his hand through my hair, “I was going to. I was waiting for the right moment.”

“Yeah, I bet,” I laughed, grabbing his hand in mine, “Your welcome.”

Justin kissed my hand, “You know, now that we’re…” he kissed up my arm between every word, “together, you can let me win on the golf course every once in awhile.”

“Yeah right,” I laughed and pushed his head away from my arm to see him laughing as well.

He stopped and his face turned serious, that scared me a little, “I do love you Dallas, and I have for a real long time.”

“I know,” I smiled as I stood up on the bed, “We’re jumping together. Come on, get up,” I pulled him up with me and laughed, “Jump with me Justin.”

“I’m jumping,” he laughed and jumped with me in his arms right down so we were lying back on the bed.

“How’s your mother?”

“Good, she’s coming out next week.”

“Cool, I’m excited to see her.”

“Yeah, she’ll be excited to see us.”

“Is that sarcasm?”

“Not at all. She’s been wanting me to get with you since the first day you met.”

I laughed as I intertwined our fingers, “She’s a smart woman.”

“That she is,” he laughed, “How are your parents?”

“Good.”

“And Audrey?” I looked up to see his smile.

“Driving me absolutely crazy. She’s telling all her friends that she went back to the hotel with you and saw you half naked.”

He got a kick out of that, “If only she could see her big sister now.”

“Shut up,” I laughed and tried to push him away but it wasn’t possible, so instead I just kissed him to shut him up myself.

“All this without tequila,” he chuckled with that crooked smile, “Imagine how much fun we’re going to have when you get a little tequila in you.” He kissed my forehead, “Some other time. Go to sleep Dallas.”

“I’m not tired.”

“Good, me neither,” he smiled as he crawled on top of me, “Round two.”