Disclaimer

I'm not affiliated in any way, shape or form with the public figures I may have a whim to write about. Don't know 'em, have no dealings with 'em at all. Other characters and story elements are simply figments of my twisted imagination and wild creativity. Any resemblance, likeness or similarity is completely unintentional. Any borrowed elements (song lyrics, themes, etc.) are given their proper credit.


Story Notes

Feedback is a greatly appreciated thing. Let me know if I'm wasting my time, if you want to see it go on or if you have constructive criticism that I might put to use. I'm pretty much an open book, so if you've got something to say, lay it on me.

This is Jen.  I do not own this photo, and I have no idea who this beautiful girl is (I believe I saw the name Kelley Thompson somewhere in the tags, but who knows), but I saw her during a Google search and my brain just screamed "That's her!"  So, everybody please meet Jen.

Credits

Story Title and Description Song credit: Come Down to Me by Saving Jane

Chapter Two

Movie reference is to Teen Wolf - one of the absolute best cinematic offerings in my lifetime. *laughs* Love that movie. The nickname Boof is introduced in this chapter and will be used frequently throughout the duration of the story.

Chapter Three

Song credit is to Michael Jackson's Black or White, of course. And yes, I tend to dance just like this in my own kitchen, in my socks and at top volume. *grin* Just imagine a fat girl doing the moonwalk across linoleum . . . yeah, makes me giggle, too.

Chapter Five

I think this one's kind of obvious, but the lyrics at the end of this chapter belong to When I See You Smile by Bad English. I know it's corny and absolutely full of cheesiness, but isn't that what those old prom songs are supposed to be? *laughs* JC seems to approve, since he throws back to it in Chapter Six as well.

Chapter Seven

First of all, obvious song credits go to Richard Marx's Now and Forever. Awesome song and I personally think JC did an awesome job with it back in the day.

Secondly, I too have read FictionLyn's It's Only Me. There are elements contained in this chapter that also appear in some capacity in IOM, only I believe I've used them in different contexts. The bracelet scene is kind of similar and there is a section with a few references to Disney characters that appears in a similar fashion. After some consideration on my use of those elements - the situations are different, Lyn used colored beads rather than charms/Robin Hood instead of John Smith, different characters/settings/dialogue/etc. are involved, etc. - I believe that these elements appear in a different light here. If she'd like credit for these ideas, then I'm more than happy to give Lyn that honor.

Lastly -- I'm obviously not using a timeline to arrange the layout of my little story here. Dates are more than likely not going to match up and I don't really plan on stressing over getting them exactly right, either. I'm already putting some extensive research into other portions of the story line and having it match exactly with true to life events is a little bit beyond me. *laughs*

Chapter Eight

Several song credits and references: Here and Now by *NSYNC, Don’t Worry, Be Happy by Bobby McFerrin, Brown Eyed Girl by Van Morrison and Foolish Games by Jewel

Also, in case you’re interested, when I refer to Jen’s singing, I imagine her to sound like Tori Kelly. Look up her performance of Soul’s Anthem (It Is Well) on YouTube and I think you’ll understand why.

Chapter Nine

In case you're interested, the instrumentals that Jen submits to Alex are Homeward Bound by William Joseph and I've Always Thought of You by Tommy Emmanuel

Violet Beauregarde: The gum-chewer from Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory

Other song credits:  You're Still the One by Shania Twain and Champagne High by Sister Hazel

Chapter Ten

Song credits:  One Sweet Day by Mariah Carey & Boyz II Men and Commitment by LeAnn Rimes

Chapter Eleven

Song reference:  Kiss Me by Sixpence None the Richer

Chapter Twelve

Song references/credits: Sailing by Christopher Cross, Stand By Me by Ben E. King and One Sweet Day by Mariah Carey and Boyz II Men

Chapters Fourteen & Fifteen

There is a very heavy reference to the musical Les Miserables for the duration of these chapters, with direct lyrical content from the songs I Dreamed a Dream, On My Own and A Little Fall of Rain.

Spoiler Alert!  If - by some outrageously odd coincidence - you haven't seen or heard of this musical, specific plot details are discussed that give away key elements of the storyline.  I was exceptionally happy to give Jen the role of Eponine, as I felt it was perfect for her character.  :-)

Chapter Eighteen

Madusa: A little throwback to one of the ladies of nineties wrestling.

Chapter Twenty

Lots of song titles through this one, but the only lyrics included are from God Must Have Spent a Little More Time on You by *NSYNC

Chapter Twenty Two

Movie reference is to While You Were Sleeping - one of my absolute favorite Sandra Bullock flicks.  And yeah, I might have had my own little crush on Jack back in the day, too.  *laughs*

Song reference: If Not With You, For You by Chris Klafford

Chapter Twenty Four

Song reference: If You Wanna Be Happy by Jimmy Soul

(Totally not a song that would get air play today - definitely not PC - but I have very fond memories of bopping to it as it blared from my Dumb Ditties eight track in the eighties. And it's definitely on my Apple playlist. *laughs*)

Chapter Twenty Five

Song references/credits: God Must Have Spent by *NSYNC, Iris by Goo Goo Dolls and Uninvited by Alanis Morrisette

September, 1982

Back, forth.

The squeaking of the swing chains echoed through the little girl’s thoughts as she stared into space.

Back, forth.

The world swayed before her as she swung lightly, her toes scraping through the dirt and her fingers gripping tightly around the chains as the other kids ran in groups around her.

The first day of school was the absolute worst. It was a day of first impressions, when kids judged whether you were someone they would hang out with, if they thought you were cool or if you would be the class 'geekwad'.

Apparently, she’d been voted 'geekwad' for Ms. Morgan’s first grade class. Not one person had spoken to her, save for the teacher, and that was only when roll was called this morning. Of course, that was how the new kid was usually treated. She’d seen it a few times last year. This class was full of kids who knew each other from kindergarten, knew who would be the coolest friend to have and who to ignore.

She didn’t know anybody and nobody knew who she was, either, so she was going to have to make that extra effort to fit in, to meet the others. But she was shy and really didn’t have the guts to stand up and announce her presence to the entire class. She was much more comfortable right here, sitting by herself on the swing set, watching everybody else run around and play on the other equipment.

The soles of her sneakers dragged the ground as she looked down at her neatly pressed jeans and Smurf t-shirt, a small smile crossing her features when the theme song from her favorite cartoon escaped from her throat in a hum. The smile quickly faded as she realized how kindergarten the cartoon was. It simply wouldn’t work for a first grader. Determination made her eyes narrow, and she vowed to find a new favorite television show before she fell asleep that night. Something not so babyish. Something more suitable for a kid who’d turned six a few weeks ago.

She didn’t realize she’d come to a stop until the swing creaked softly, swaying gently with the soft breeze that had picked up. Lifting her small hand, she let it move with the slight wind, not minding one bit that she wasn’t swinging. She turned her face into the breeze, closing her eyes and taking a deep breath, letting the pure air cleanse her spirit and clear her thoughts.

“Do you need a push?”

Her head whipped around, wide brown eyes flying open to clash with brilliant cobalt.

He was smiling shyly at her, his hands shoved into his pockets.

She recognized him as the boy from the back of the classroom. He was quiet, but his smile, though somewhat crooked, was soothing, prompting her to smile back at him. “If you want. I’m not gonna make you, though.”

Stepping forward, he placed his hands firmly on her back and gave her a good push, sending her rushing forward.

Within moments she was flying.

She threw her head back, letting her ponytail stream behind her, her smile unmistakable from his view every time she whizzed past him, the expression on her face revealing exactly how she felt … free.

----------------------------------------

November, 1984

“Are you sure you want to go all the way to the top?”

“Yeah. Come on, it’s not that much higher. Just a few more branches.”

“Well, you go right ahead. I’m happy right here.”

“Chicken. Live a little.”

“I’m eight. I live plenty.”

“Whatever.”

“Be careful, okay? It’s really high up there.”

“It’s fine.” He stretched upward, determined to make it all the way to highest branch, rolling his eyes at her caution.

Her eyes widened when he grabbed onto a weak-looking branch. “Josh, don’t try that one, try a different one.”

“I know what I’m doing, okay?” His hand tightened on the limb, which bent dangerously as he pulled up his weight.

“Josh …”

The limb snapped in his hand, and she caught his terrified expression as he scrabbled for a solid branch as he fell.

She was already swinging herself down when he landed with a thud in the pile of leaves at the base of the tree. Her feet hit solid ground right next to him and she immediately fell to her knees, her eyes scanning for blood that might stain his clothing. “Josh, are you all right?”

He didn’t respond. No movement, twitch, moan. Nothing.

“Josh?” Her hands traveled from his head to his shoulders then moved down his arms, unsure of what she was looking for, but she’d seen it on television, so there had to be some point to it. “Josh?”

Still nothing.

Tears began to stream down her cheeks as she smoothed her hands over his head and face once again, brushing the leaves from his hair. “Josh. Come on, Josh.” She could hear her own tears as her voice wobbled.

Her arms snaked around her legs, hugging her knees to her chest as she sat next to him, crying quietly as she scrambled for an idea of what to do. The only thing she could conjure up was a panicked, frightened blank and she buried her face in her knees, the tears soaking through her jeans as her shoulders hitched with her deep breaths.

Then, in a moment of silence, she heard it.

Quiet laughter. Crunching leaves as he rolled.

“Hey, don’t cry.”

She raised her head to meet his eyes, which quickly turned from laughing to regretful when he saw her tear-streaked face.

“Oh, man. I was just kidding. Don’t cry. I’m all right.”

The trembling of her fingers was obvious as she wiped her eyes, then swung a fist to punch him sharply on the shoulder. “Don’t you ever do anything like that again, you jerk! You scared me to death!”

“I’m sorry. Come on, get up.” He helped her to her feet, pulling her into a hug. “I’ll never do it again, I swear.”

Her hands clutched at him desperately, then she pushed him away, wiping her eyes again to glare at him. “Right.”

He followed her as she walked away from the tree and toward her house. “Come on, Jenny. I’m sorry.”

“Just give me a little while to get over it, okay? For a minute there, I thought you were dead.” She turned to face him in her driveway. “I’ve never been so scared in my life.”

“Is that why you freaked out? You thought I was dead? I was breathing, Jen. You thought of everything but that.”

“I panicked. So sue me.” Her shoulders rose in a poor attempt at a noncommittal shrug, and he could still tell that she was shaken.

When she turned to go up her front steps, he grabbed her arm and turned her around, pulling her back into another hug, where she started sobbing against him again.

“Hey. Everything’s okay. I’m fine. You’re fine. The tree’s fine.” A watery laugh escaped, muffled by his shirt, reassuring him slightly. “There’s nothing to worry about. I was stupid and I’m sorry.” His brow furrowed when he felt her trembling, her whole body shaking as she fought to take deep breaths. “Come on, calm down. I’m right here.”

Finally, she was able to raise her head, her fingers coming up to dry the fresh tears. “You’re my best friend and I thought I’d lost you. That … that scared me. Losing you is the worst thing that could ever happen to me.”

“Wow.” His eyes widened. “I didn’t know you cared so much.”

She rolled her eyes as she unlocked the door, then motioned him in. “Guys are so dense. Don’t you know by now that I love you?” He stopped to look at her, and she grinned. “Through thick and thin, friends to the end. Right?”

With a smile, he leaned over and wrapped an arm around her. “Right.”

----------------------------------------

April, 1988

“I still can’t believe she said yes!”

Jen rolled her eyes as she bent to dig the baseball out of the bushes. “Yeah, shocker. She’s just been after you all freakin’ year.” She muttered to herself as she got down on her knees and crawled into the branches, until she finally found it underneath some low hanging leaves. As she stood, she plastered a grin on her face and dusted off her jeans. “Yeah, Josh. It’s awesome.”

“Candice Patterson said yes to me, Jen.” He was bouncing in place, that silly smile still lighting up his eyes as he swung the baseball bat back and forth. “The most popular girl in our grade is going with me to the sixth-grade prom. Not Adam Levine. Not Mike Hill. Me.”

“Adam and Mike are both losers. You know that.” She tossed the ball up and caught it in her glove. “Why everybody wants to be around those jerks … I just don’t get it.”

“They might be losers, but they’re the popular guys.” He laughed. “And she said no to them and yes to me. This is gonna be such a blast.”

“It’s the last dance of the year for us, of course it’ll be a blast.” Her eyes followed the ball as she flipped it into the air and caught it just before it hit the ground. “I really don’t think it’ll matter who you’re there with.”

“Oh, yeah, it matters.” A deep breath escaped as he looked to the sky, his voice going dreamy again. “Dances are always fun, but … well, Candice makes this one perfect.”

At his words, a pang of hurt streaked through her. Every other dance, they’d gone together. And while she knew he wasn’t trying to say that Candice was better company, his words caused a pain all the same. Ignoring the lingering sting, she shook her head, the ponytail on the top of her head swishing over her shoulders. “How long have you had a crush on her, Josh?”

His head jerked down and he stared at her. “What?”

“Candice. How long have you had a crush on her?”

“Oh … um, well …” The tips of his ears turned red with his blush. “I don’t know. I think … maybe since October.”

“October, huh?” She tilted her head and studied him. “What do you like about her?”

“Well, she’s cute. And she’s a cheerleader. And she’s smart.” The bat went around again as he thought. “And she’s nice. And funny.” He lifted his eyes and grinned as he watched her toss the ball once more. “She’s not like the other girls in our class.”

“Yes, she is.”

“What?”

“She’s exactly like every other girl in our class. They all want to be her, so she’s probably more of a ringleader than anything else.” Her knuckles turned white as she gripped the ball, pressing it into the palm of her glove forcibly. “You’re a guy, so you don’t see it.”

“No, you’re a girl, so you don’t see it.” Blue eyes moved over her contemplatively. “She reminds me a lot of you.”

“Me?” The disbelief was written all over her face, and she had to fight to keep the disgust out of her tone. “You can’t be serious.”

“Why not? Smart, nice, cute, funny …” He ticked the adjectives off on his fingers. “She’s a blonde version of you. The cheerleader part is just an added bonus.”

A laugh escaped and she kept her eyes on the white sphere as she tossed it in the air once again. “I’m cute? Yeah, right.”

“Seth Akers thinks you are.” His smile turned evil as he kept going. “He told me so.”

She froze, not even noticing the ball hit the ground at her feet. “You’re joking, right?”

“Nope. He stopped me in the hall the other day to ask about you. Wanted to know if you were coming Friday night. I had to tell him I didn’t know.” If possible, his expression became even more devilish. “He’s got your phone number, though. He may just ask you for himself.”

“No way.” Eyes wide, she shook her head back and forth, stammering as her words caught in her throat. “I’m not … I don’t … He’s not …”

Ignoring her stuttering, he tightened his grip on the bat and swung it around again. “Just face it. You won’t be able to tell him no. And you’ll come to the dance and we’ll have a good time, just like always.”

She blinked several times, then shrugged. “Well, yeah. I guess.”

He sent her a knowing smile and took a hitting stance. “How about you stop guessing and throw me a good one?”

“Sure. If you can hit it, I’ll be amazed.”

As always when he was at the plate, everything slowed into half time as his grip tightened around the bat. Blue eyes locked on the ball in her hand as she wound up, her arm whipping forward to let it fly. He bit his lip as the ball flew toward him, then swung the bat, the wood connecting with the ball in a very satisfying cracking noise. The ball sailed high over her head and they both just stood back and watched it sail …

Straight through the Lawson’s living room window.

The glass shattered with a loud crash, followed immediately by a second breaking sound … the lamp by the couch.

“Holy God in Heaven.”

Her hand was covering her mouth, her eyes wide as his voice was the only thing she could hear. Turning to look at him, she saw his horrified expression, the bat still poised over his shoulder as if he’d just finished the swing.

“I’m dead. I’m so dead.”

“Jennifer Nicole!”

The scream from inside the house was deafening and it snapped her brain back into action. Josh had broken the window. A broken window meant definite grounding. For her, grounding meant no dance. She really wanted to go, but not nearly as badly as he did. There would always be another dance to go to.

For him, grounding meant no dance, but that also meant no Candice. He was looking forward to that, so excited about being there to hang out and dance with the popular kids. Dances weren’t a rarity by any means, but chances were, there wouldn’t be another time that he could say he’d taken the Princess Candice to a school dance. Plus, backing out on Candice Patterson, no matter what the circumstances, was a major social no-no.

A quiet sigh escaped when she realized that there was no way she’d be able to live with herself if she let him take the blame and miss his sixth-grade prom. He deserved better than to be stuck going to every dance with his best friend, who rated no higher than just being one of the guys. Her heart sank as she realized how badly she wanted him to have the chance to go on a date with one of the prettiest girls in their class.

Glancing down at the glove covering her hand, she swallowed hard, knowing that she’d do anything for him to be that happy, no matter what it cost her. Without another thought, she was pulling the soft leather from her fingers and rushing over to him, taking the bat from his hands and shoving her glove against his chest. “Get over there.”

“Huh?”

“She didn’t see who did it.” She groaned and pushed him until he was positioned where she’d been standing. “Stay here!”

He looked around, dazed, his eyes widening as he realized that it would seem as though he’d been pitching. “Wait. Jen …”

“Shut up! Here she comes.” She was able to send him a reassuring glance before the front door slammed open and Lisa Lawson was storming across the yard, just the sight making them both tremble in fear. By the time the woman had reached them, the bat was visibly shaking in Jen’s hands. “Oh, God. Mom, I’m sorry.”

“How many times have we told you to hit the ball away from the house?”

“Mom, I ..”

“Just wait until your father gets home, young lady …”

“He’s already home.” All three of them turned at the new voice, surprised to see Steve Lawson coming around the corner and into the side yard. “What happened here?”

“Your daughter just shattered our living room window.” Lisa glared down at Jen. “And my grandmother’s antique lamp.”

Jen swallowed hard as she watched her father’s eyes flicker over to the house, then back to give her a stern look. “Jennifer?”

“I didn’t mean to, Daddy. It was an accident.” She flinched when the bat slipped from her fingers to land on the ground.

The paternal gaze moved from her over to Josh. “And you?”

The glove on his hand began to tremble and his eyes widened as though he were trapped in a set of headlights. “I … I …”

She saw his terrified look and jumped in before he could blow the whole thing. “He didn’t do anything but throw the ball, Dad. It wasn’t his fault.”

“Uh huh.” Steve stood there silently for a minute, a measuring glance moving between the two kids before turning to his wife. “What’s that smell?”

“Oh! My bread!” Lisa took off at a run for the back door, leaving the group behind to sort things out between themselves.

Jen looked at the broken window, then down at the ground. “I’m really sorry, Daddy.”

“I know you are. I’ve broken my fair share of windows, so I know what it’s like.” His eyes shifted back and forth between them again. “Okay, kids. I’m not buying it, but I’m not going to push it, either. Joshua, take your bat and head home. Jenny and I have some talking to do.”

Josh stared at Jen as he took off the glove, shaking his head at her as he stepped up next to her father. “Mr. Lawson, I …”

“He didn’t know I could hit the ball that hard.” She interrupted, pulling her gaze up until she could see them both. “Right, Josh?”

“Um …” He took in her slightly widened eyes, saw the well-masked threat hidden there, and cleared his throat. “Y-yeah. That’s right.”

“Okay.” Steve nodded shortly, his focus never leaving his daughter. “Go on, Josh.”

“Yes, sir.” Josh stooped quickly, picking up his bat and mouthing a silent I’m sorry to Jen before turning to walk down the driveway.

Father and daughter watched as he left, then slowly turned back to each other.

“Any particular reason why you’re covering for him?”

“What?” Jen did her best to keep an innocent expression. “I’m not …”

“I saw the whole thing from the street, honey. I know you were pitching, not him.”

She flinched. “You saw?”

“Yeah, I did. Your shoving him around was quite a show.” He arched an eyebrow at her. “So, why the cover up?”

A deep sigh escaped before she answered. “Okay, so I couldn’t let him get grounded three days before the prom.”

“The prom, huh? What’s so special about a sixth-grade prom?”

“Candice Patterson.”

His eyes narrowed at the name. “Who?”

“Candice Patterson makes it special.” She heaved another sigh. “She’s the most popular girl in our grade and she said yes when Josh asked her to go with him.”

“Ah.” The deep voice above her was tinged with a mix of laughter and understanding. “I think I get it.”

“Yeah. It’s the first dance where he has a date.” Steve’s brow furrowed at her words, his mouth opening to argue, but she barreled on. “His first dance with a real date, Dad. The times we went together don’t count, because I’m just the best friend, not girlfriend material.” Her arms crossed over her chest. “He hasn’t talked about anything else all week. He’s been so excited and happy, I couldn’t let him miss it.”

“And you didn’t want to go?”

“Oh, yeah, I wanted to go. Dances are always a blast and … and I think Seth Akers was going to ask me to go with him.” She tilted her head up to look at the sky. “But I couldn’t live with myself if I took that away from Josh. Not when I know how much it means to him.”

“You’re willing to take his grounding so he can go to the dance with this Candice girl?”

“Yeah, I am. I threw the ball, so that really makes it at least half my fault, doesn’t it?” Brown eyes moved over to study him. “Remember when I was little and you were teaching me about the difference between right and wrong?”

“I sure do.”

“You told me that if it felt wrong, then it probably was wrong.” Her teeth bit on her lip and she cleared her throat. “Well, when I thought about him missing the dance, it felt wrong.”

“And you missing the dance feels right?”

“Kind of. I guess.” She didn’t give voice to the confusion tumbling in her chest, fighting down the overwhelming feeling that going to a dance with anyone other than him was definitely the opposite of right. “Josh is my best friend, Dad. If taking the blame for him gives him a chance like this one, then I’d do it a hundred times.”

“Really?” Steve smiled slightly, fighting to keep the knowing look from spreading across his features. “A hundred times?”

“Yep. In a heartbeat.”

“Well, all right, then.” Silence settled for a few minutes, until he reached up to take off his hat and run his fingers through his hair. “That window still needs to be replaced, Jen.”

“I know.” She bit her lip again, thinking of the money she’d painstakingly saved, dreaming of buying one of the awesome mountain bikes on display at the Outdoor Store. “I’ve been saving my allowance and leftover lunch money for over a year. Take that and I’ll make up the difference somehow.”

“Hmm.” His eyes widened. “What about that bike you wanted?”

“They’ll always make bikes, Dad.” Slender shoulders shrugged, trying to appear indifferent. “I’ll just start over.”

“And there’s always going to be other dances …”

“Not with Candice Patterson, there won’t be.” She interrupted. “Just take the money. It’s not that big of a deal. Besides, I might change my mind and want something else.”

He looked her over carefully. “Do you think he’ll pay you back?”

“He doesn’t have to. And I won’t ask him to, either.” There was a jingling sound as she shoved her hands in her pockets, making her change from lunch clink together. “So … grounded for three weeks, no dance and I pay for the window. Sound fair?”

“For something you really didn’t do? Sounds kind of rough to me.”

“It doesn’t matter if I did it or not. I’m owning up to it and that makes it my responsibility to fix it.” A small smile played across her lips. “Besides, if I’m not grounded, Aunt Karen is going to know something’s up.”

“True.” He scratched the back of his neck. “Tell you what. You give us the money you’ve got saved and I’ll make up the difference. Then, grounded for one week, but we’ll relax it a little bit.”

“Relax it? How?”

“No dance and no phone, but I don’t think there’d be a problem if Josh wanted to come over. You can’t leave the yard, though. Deal?”

“Deal.” With a bright grin, she threw her arms around his waist. “Thanks, Dad.”

“She’s thanking me for grounding her. Who knew?” He laughed, hugging her back. “And I won’t tell Josh’s parents, either. I’ll leave that between you guys.”

“Great.” She pulled away and began walking toward the house. “How about I go get that money before I start regretting this?”

“Sure thing.” He trailed behind her through the door. “Get washed up while you’re at it, I think dinner might be ready.”

*********************

Friday night

She propped her elbow on the desk, then rested her chin in her hand as she stared out the open window at the night sky. “Well, Josh … I hope it was fun.” Her gaze moved over the moon, picking out a few of the largest craters. “And I hope she was worth it.” With a sigh, she pushed herself out of the chair and moved toward the bed, working her hair into a loose ponytail before pulling back the covers and climbing in.

As she settled herself under the blankets, her eyes fell on the newly empty jar sitting on the dresser. She bit her lip, wishing for just a second that she could have that money back. With a shake of her head, she pushed back the regret, knowing that tonight probably meant more to Josh than a new bike would ever mean to her.

Just as she was reaching out to turn off the lamp, there was a sharp cracking noise against the metal framing of the window, the sound nearly sending her tumbling to the floor when she jumped in fright.

Fighting to catch her breath, she just sat there, waiting to see if the sound would come again. When it did, she pulled herself out from between the sheets and cautiously inched over to look out the window. For a moment, squinting into the darkness as her eyes tried to adjust, she couldn’t see anything. But then she heard it.

“Jen! Hey, Jenny! Over here.”

She turned her head, trying to find where the whisper was coming from, until she finally saw a shadow underneath one of the trees in the yard. “Yeah? Who’s there?”

“Who else would it be?” He stepped out into the moonlight, waving up at her. “Come on down.”

“Are you crazy? If they catch me out in the backyard with you when I’m supposed to be grounded …”

“Go on down there, honey.”

She whirled around, biting her lip when she saw her parents standing in her doorway. “Um … what?”

“Go on down.” Her mother smiled as she walked across the room. “He asked us first.”

“Jen!” He wasn’t even trying to be quiet now, openly yelling at her. “Jenny!”

“Seriously?” She leaned back toward the window. “Shut up before you wake up the neighbors!”

“If you’d get your butt down here, I wouldn’t have to yell.”

“Hang on a minute.” Her eyes wide, she turned back to her father. “What did he ask you?”

“It’s a surprise. Just go on down and find out.” Steve gave her a gentle push toward the door just as another yell came from the backyard. “Hurry up before he really does wake up old Mrs. Ruleman.”

“I’m going, I’m going.” She didn’t even try to hide her smile as she walked out the door and down the hall.

“Don’t stay out there too late, okay?”

“I won’t.” Jen turned back once, sending her mother a quick grin before dashing down the steps and out the back door, pausing only to slip on the pair of shoes she’d left in the back hallway. She stopped on the porch, blinking in the darkness as she tried to remember which tree he’d been next to.

“Are you just gonna stand there, or are you coming out?”

“What do you think? You got me down here, didn’t you?” The corners of her mouth twitched in a smile as she turned toward his voice. “I’m trying to figure out where you are.”

“I’m over here.” He laughed. “You know, you could always turn on the porch light.”

“Yeah, but what fun would that be?” Finally, her eyes adjusted in the sparse moonlight and she could see him leaning against the house a few yards away. “What are you doing out here?”

“Cute pajamas. Are the frog pants new?” He dodged her question expertly, his smile evident in his voice.

“Yeah, they are.” The moon came out from behind a cloud, allowing her to see his khaki pants and suit jacket. “Wow, you look really nice.”

“Thanks. I try.”

Blinking quickly, she got her mind back on track. “What are you doing out here, Josh?”

“I’m paying you back.”

“Paying me back?” Her forehead wrinkled in confusion. “For what?”

“For tonight.” He pushed away from the brick wall and walked to her. “You took the blame for the window so I could go to the dance.”

“You don’t have to pay me back, Josh.” She shook her head. “I knew what it meant to you, so I made it happen. That’s what true friends do.”

“No, a true friend would have let me vent and gripe, sympathized that I couldn’t go and went to the dance without me.” He shoved his hands in his pockets. “You didn’t only save me from getting grounded, you gave up something I know you really wanted so that I could go out with Candice.” His smile shone through the darkness. “That’s more than just a true friend, Jen.”

“I didn’t want to go to the dance that badly …”

“I’m not talking about the dance. I’m talking about your bike.” White teeth worked over his lip as he stared at her. “You’ve been saving your money for over a year, talking about it for nearly that long … but you gave it up for me.”

“You’re more important than any bike, Josh.”

“And you’re more important than a school dance, no matter who said they’d go with me.” His fingers combed quickly through his hair. “I should’ve been quicker to figure that out, Jenny. I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be sorry. I did what I thought I had to do.”

“But I still owe you.”

“No, you don’t.” Her arms crossed over her chest. “I wouldn’t have done it if it hadn’t been the right thing.”

“I don’t care. I’m still going to pay you back and I’m starting right now.”

“You are?” A dark eyebrow arched suspiciously. “How?”

“Come on.” He grabbed her hand and pulled her out into the yard. “You had to miss the dance because of me, so I’m bringing the dance to you.”

“What?”

“Stay here.” Releasing her, he jogged back to the side of the house, taking off his jacket to reveal his white dress shirt before kneeling down and fiddling with something on the ground. Music started playing and she had to smile as he walked back to her. “I stole one of the tapes from the teacher’s lounge, so this is about as close as I can get it.” He looked around. “Well, minus the gym and decorations.”

“Josh …” She trailed off in a laugh. “You didn’t have to do this.”

“Yeah, I did.” His arms spread out in invitation. “Well? Are you gonna dance with me or not? I won’t bite, you know.”

“Yes, you will, but you’ve had your shots, so I’ll risk it.” Stepping forward, she wrapped her arms around his neck, immediately finding the beat of the song and swaying with him. “Was it fun?”

“It was okay. I hung out with Seth and Mike for most of the time, so that was different.” He laughed. “If you’d been there, I would’ve danced more.”

“Really? What happened to …”

“She decided that she’d rather sit with her friends and brag about the New Kids concert tickets her mom was able to get.” She could feel him sigh. “When she told me to go get her another drink, I split.”

“I’m sorry, Josh.” Her arms squeezed around his neck in a comforting hug. “I wish she’d been what you wanted her to be.”

“Hey, it’s all right. You tried to tell me, but I wouldn’t listen.” He smiled at her. “She just proved me wrong.”

“Wrong about what?”

“She’s not another you. She doesn’t even come close to measuring up.” His arms tightened around her. “I don’t want to talk about her right now. Let’s just dance, okay?”

“Okay.” She nodded, smiling when he kissed the side of her head. The music changed and she had to laugh when he swung her around in time to the Culture Club song pouring over the backyard with the moonlight, completely oblivious to the watchful eyes of her parents, who were exchanging wide smiles on the other side of her bedroom window.

----------------------------------------

October, 1989

“Have a good day, Love.”

She looked up from her bowl of cereal as her father leaned down to give her a hug, swallowing quickly so that she could grin at him and kiss his cheek. “You too, Daddy.” Her head tilted as he stood, reaching for the lunchbox on the counter. “Which site are you working today?”

“The new hotel going in on Fourth.” He checked his watch. “And I’m going to be late if I don’t get going.”

“Jenny! Karen and Josh are here!” Her mother’s voice rang from the living room. “Hurry up or you’re going to be late!”

“Guess that makes two of us.” He cast a stern look at his daughter. “Behave yourself today.”

“I will.” She grinned at him again. “You too.”

He laughed and watched as she dumped the milk from her bowl into the sink and ducked into the bathroom, then turned to move to the door.

“I love you, Daddy.”

Stopping in the doorway, he jingled his keys as he looked at her standing there with her toothbrush in her mouth. “I love you too, kiddo.”

She watched him walk out and get into his car before her mother yelled again. “Jennifer!”

“Coming!” She finished up with her teeth, grabbed up her backpack and lunch, and ran to the front door, stopping only to give her mother a quick hug before hurrying out to the van, calling back over her shoulder. “Bye, Mom!”

*********************

Blue eyes moved restlessly around the room, finally settling on staring out the window at the dark sky, the worry rising in him once again. She’d promised to call and let him know what was going on as she’d packed up her stuff to leave class that afternoon. Her face had been puzzled, her confusion over why she was being picked up early from school obvious in her actions.

“It’s probably a dentist appointment or something. I just can’t remember it. I’ll call you when I get home.”

He could still hear the doubt in her voice as she zipped up her backpack and slung it over her shoulder.

But she hadn’t called and he couldn’t focus on the math book in front of him for more than a few seconds at a time, different scenarios flying through his mind every time he tried to work out the equations.

Surely she was okay. He would have heard if she wasn’t. Turning away from the window, he focused back on his math, determined to keep the panic at bay until he had finished the assigned work.

A little while later, he’d just finished up the fifth of the equations when he heard the phone ring, the sound pulling his attention away from his homework. His brow furrowed, his ears straining to hear the tone in his mother’s voice as she spoke.

“Josh!”

His eyes widened at her call and he got to his feet, moving quickly out the door and down the stairs. “Yeah, Mom?”

“Come here, son.”

“Sure.” He followed her voice into the kitchen, his wide eyes narrowing when he saw her posture. “What’s up?”

“Sit down.” She patted the chair next to her, a sad smile on her face. “We need to talk.”

“What’s going on?” Obediently, he sat, his eyes never leaving her face. “Who was on the phone?”

“That was Jenny’s grandmother. Josh … Mr. Lawson passed away today.”

He visibly jerked in shock. “What?”

“He was in an accident.” Karen took a deep breath, shaking her head. “At work. The doctors tried their best, but they just couldn’t save him.”

“Jenny …” The words refused to set in, his mind going in a million different directions. “How’s Jenny?”

“She’s upset right now. She’s sad and she’s hurting.”

“I need to go see her.” He stood from the chair. “Can we go, Mom? She’ll … she’ll need me.”

“I don’t know, Josh.” She looked at the clock on the wall. “It’s late. We should probably wait until tomorrow.”

“No.” Serious blue eyes met hers dead on. “Jen needs me now. If you’ll take me, I’ll stay over there tonight.”

“She might end up at her grandmother’s tonight.”

“Then I’ll go with her.” His voice was stubborn. “Mom, I know it’s dark, but she’s just around the block. Or just through the woods. I’ll walk to her if I have to.”

Mother and son stood there, measuring each other until she finally sighed. “Get some clothes together. I’ll call and make sure they’re still at home.” She watched as he practically ran for the door. “What are you going to do about school tomorrow?”

“If she’s not going, then I’ll stay with her.” A dark eyebrow rose when she opened her mouth to protest. “Mom, she’s my best friend. I’m not going to leave her alone right now.” He gave her a smile, then turned to rush out the door and back up the stairs, leaving her staring at his retreating form.

“You can’t tell him that his heart isn’t in the right place, Karen.” Roy spoke up from where he was leaning in the doorway to the kitchen. “At least he’s got his priorities straight.”

“I know. He makes more sense than most adults I know.” She shook her head as she reached for the phone again. “I swear, that boy is thirteen going on thirty.”

Fifteen minutes later, they were pulling up in the Lawson’s driveway. The car hadn’t even come to a complete stop when he opened the door and jumped out, backpack over his shoulder as he walked to the front door, then waited for her to join him. “I don’t want to be the one to knock, Mom.”

His eyes pled with her and she couldn’t help but smile. “It’s okay. I’ll do it.” She put her arm around him before reaching up to knock softly on the wood.

Not more than a minute later, the door was pulled open to reveal an older woman with curled white hair. “Karen. Joshua. Come in, come in.” She closed the door behind them. “Lisa is in the living room, Karen.”

“Hey, Grams.” He stopped to hug her on the way in, watching as his mother walked into the living room and sat beside Jen’s mother on the couch. Lisa looked as though she hadn’t slept in days, her eyes red-rimmed from the tears and her posture slumped in exhaustion. At the moment she was hugging Karen, her shoulders heaving with heartbroken sobs.

“I hear you argued your way over here, young man.” Grams’ voice drew his attention and he looked up to intercept the stern look she was giving him.

“I didn’t argue. She didn’t have to bring me.” He tilted his head as her eyes narrowed on him. “I could’ve walked. This way was just safer.”

The old woman gave a quiet laugh, patting his back. “That’s my boy.”

“Where is she, Grams?” His expression became questioning as he hoisted the backpack higher up on his shoulder. “Where’s Jenny?”

“She’s upstairs in her room.” Before the words were even out of her mouth, he was already moving, taking the stairs two and three at a time.

He blinked, his vision adjusting to the darkness as he walked down the dark hallway, his eyes narrowing when they focused on the thin strip of dim light coming from underneath her bedroom door. Pausing, he took a deep breath before knocking quietly and pushing the door open. “Jen?”

“Hey.” Her voice was watery as his head came through the doorway and she sniffled as she sat up on the bed. “Come on in, Josh.”

He stepped inside the room, dropping his backpack next to the door as his gaze moved over her. One of the bedside lamps was on, providing the only light in the room, illuminating the bed while keeping the corners in shadow. She was sitting cross-legged in the middle of her full-sized bed, shivering despite her sweatshirt, jeans and socks. Her face was tear-stained, her posture defeated, her eyes red-rimmed … an exact replica of the picture Lisa had made sitting on the couch.

“I’m sorry I didn’t call. I just … I couldn’t …” She sniffled again, pulling her knees to her chest and hugging her arms around them.

“No. Don’t worry about that.” Without a second thought, he slipped off his shoes and got on the bed with her, pulling her to him in a tight hug. “I’m so sorry, Jen. So sorry.”

She swallowed hard as she looped her arms around his neck, burying her face in his shoulder. “He’s gone, Josh.” A sob ripped from her throat and she gripped him tighter as the tears began to flow again. “My dad’s gone.”

“I know.” His arms tightened around her, his palms pressing into her quivering back as he hugged her to him. “I know, Jenny. And I’m so sorry.”

Neither said a word for a while. They just sat there, holding each other until the wave of crying was over and she was left sniffling in his arms. She lifted her head, wiping at her eyes. “I’m so tired.” A shaky yawn escaped. “I just want to sleep.”

“Go ahead. I’m not going anywhere.”

“I … I can’t.” She whispered. “I’m scared.”

“Scared?” He tilted his head, studying her. “Scared of what?”

“If … if I fall asleep … what if I forget him?” Her eyes welled up again, but only two tears escaped, one running down each cheek. “I don’t want to forget him, Josh.”

“You won’t forget him, Jenny.” His hands came up, his fingers brushing her hair away from the wet spots on her face. “I promise. You have so many memories of him that it would be impossible for you to forget.”

She leaned forward, her forehead resting on his shoulder as she took another shaky breath. “But what if …”

“If you feel like he’s starting to slip away, then come to me and we’ll talk about him.” He tightened his arms around her again, rocking back and forth to help her relax. “We’ll pull out the old photo albums and tell stories of everything that we did with him. You can tell me about things he did with you, things that only you know and maybe I can tell you some things you don’t know.”

“I know everything about Daddy. Everything he said, everything he did …” Her voice grew soft as she began to drift off. “He never kept anything from me.”

“Maybe you’re right. Maybe he did. But maybe I know a thing or two that you don’t.” He spoke softly and continued to rock, knowing she wouldn’t be awake much longer. “There are so many things you can do to remember, Jen. Dreaming … dreaming is one of them. He’ll live forever in your dreams.”

Her breathing had grown deep, her arms loosening their hold on him, and he knew she’d fallen asleep. Twisting, he pulled her arms from around his neck, slowly laying her down so that she wouldn’t awaken. He backed away from her and off the bed, moving around to turn off the lamp, shrouding the room in darkness before settling himself back on the oversized comforter.

He heard her give a quiet whimper, turning on her side and curling into herself as she slept. Carefully, he moved so that he was right behind her, spooning her, his fingers lacing through hers as he tried to comfort her in the only way he knew how. She sobbed quietly, her body tensing against him, and he tightened his hold on her once again.

“It’s okay, Jenny. I’m here.”

The words were whispered to her, his fingers tightening on hers, and she sighed, relaxing back against him.

He blinked in the darkness, biting his lip as he tried to imagine being in her position. Just the thought made him choke up a little bit and he had to fight back his own tears. Shaking his head, he released her hand just long enough to pull the comforter around so that they were cocooned in its softness. Then he took her hand again, stretching up to kiss her cheek before settling down behind her, resting his head on her pillow.

“I’m trusting you to take care of her, Joshua. She’s the only Jenny I’m ever going to have.”

Mr. Lawson’s words rang through his head, a warning he’d received years ago, when she’d gotten hurt attempting a bike trick he’d dared her to do.

“She won’t get hurt again. I promise, Mr. Lawson. I won’t let anyone hurt her.”

As he lay there, listening to her shaky breathing as she slept, that promise took on an all new meaning. He bit his lip as she instinctively snuggled back into his chest, sighing softly as her breathing grew less shaky. His head tilted forward until his forehead rested against the soft hair on the back of her head.

“I’ll always be here, Jenny. No matter what.”

July, 1990 

She looked down at the book, then concentrated on her fingers, trying to position them just right on the strings.

A few seconds later her fingertips were burning from pressing down so hard, but when she strummed, she was rewarded with a rich chord that resonated from the wooden chamber.

“Cool.”

Her grin grew wider as she pieced together her work from the last hour, shifting her fingers from one position to the next while she strummed, stringing together the combination of chords in the melody as it was written in the book beside her.

She hummed along quietly as she played it again, her hair falling into her eyes as she leaned over to see the strings she was pressing down, completely oblivious to the shadow moving toward her house.

“Hey, that’s awesome, Boof.”

Keeping her attention on the strings, she shook her head and laughed.  “You’re seriously gonna start calling me that?”

“Yeah.”  His tone was light, and she could hear his grin as he continued.  “Why not?  You love that movie.”

“The movie’s great, but the name . . . it’s kinda stupid, don’t you think?”

“Nope.  Besides, you could be Boof, so it works.”  He watched as she continued to strum, then plopped down on the steps next to her, smiling as he looked over the instrument in her lap.  “Where’d you get the guitar?”

“I found it in the attic.  It was Dad’s.”  She looked up, shaking back the brown hair around her face with a growl.  “I need a haircut.”

“Or a rubber band.  Turn your head.”  His hands came to the back of her head when she obeyed, his fingers combing her hair into a ponytail before securing it with the band from his wrist.  “I didn’t know your dad played.”

“He didn’t.  He bought it and wanted to take lessons, but he never got around to it.”  The playful tug on her hair told her that he was done and she turned back to grin at him.  “Thanks.”

“No problem.”  His eyes came to the redness of her fingertips and he winced before reaching out to pick up the book.  “How long have you been sitting out here?”

“A little over an hour.  Not too long.”  Pain shot through her index finger and she brought it up to put it in her mouth, hoping that the moisture would soothe the dry, cracked skin.

“It’s only been an hour and you’re already halfway through the beginner’s book?”  He arched an eyebrow at her as he turned the pages.

“Well, yeah.  Most of it is remembering the finger positions for the chords.  It’s not that hard until you start putting them together.”

“No kidding.”  The pages moved quickly as he flipped through them.  “Are you gonna take lessons?”

“I don’t think so.”  Her fingers strummed over the strings once again.

“No?”  His head jerked up at her tone.  “Why not?”

“Mom’s pretty tapped out by the piano lessons, Josh.  I can’t ask her to let me do anything else.”

“So drop the piano for a while.”

“I can’t really do that, either.  I begged for those lessons.  And I like to play . . .”

“I’m not saying to quit the piano, period.”  He tilted his head as he thought about it.  “You’re at an advanced level on the keys.  Maybe you could do some practicing on your own to keep that stuff fresh while you work on the guitar for right now.”  The sun reflected off the polished wood in her lap, making him squint.  “Just think how awesome it would be to learn to play on your dad’s guitar.”

She was silent for a few minutes, strumming quietly as she thought over what he’d said.  Finally, she looked back up at him.  “I think you’re right.  I love the keys and I can keep them up on my own for a few months.”  Her smile faded as she remembered.  “But the guitar lessons are more expensive than the piano lessons.  How do I get around that?”

He grinned at her.  “Easy.  Mom’s been after me to start taking lessons.  If you’ll teach me, I’m sure we can work something out.”

“You’d do that for me?”

“Well, yeah.  I want to learn, anyway, so it’s not like I’m getting the short end of the stick here.”  His shoulder bumped against hers.  “Plus I’ll get to spend more time with the coolest girl I know.”

She laughed.  “You have no idea what kind of teacher I’ll be, Josh.  What if it doesn’t work?”

“It’ll work.  I’ve seen you in action.”  He saw her doubtful expression and sent her a wink.  “Come on, Jen.  You could teach me to play piano with your eyes closed.  You need to concentrate on the guitar for a while.”  He laughed.  “Besides, you’re the only one I know who has the patience to put up with me.”

“That’s true . . .”  Her sentence trailed off as she arched an eyebrow playfully.  “Okay.  Let’s talk to your mom first to see what she thinks, then we’ll talk with mine.”

“Great.  This is gonna work, Jen.  I promise.”

“Whatever you say.”  She strummed once more before looking up again.  “Hey . . . since when am I the coolest girl you know?  What happened to Amanda?”

“Eh, you know how it is.”  He shrugged flippantly before leaning back on his elbows to stare at the sky.  “She got over it and so did I.  We’re starting classes over at the high school soon, anyway . . . if it hadn’t ended now, it would’ve ended then.”

“I’m sorry.  I know you liked her.”

“I’m not.  Like I said, better now than later.”  He snickered.  “Besides, my ‘coolness’ factor dropped a few notches when I told her off last week.”

She put down the guitar and turned so that she could look directly at him.  “You told her off?  Why?”

His eyes slid closed as he relaxed.  “She . . . uh, she didn’t like that I hung around certain people.”

“Certain people?”  Her brow furrowed.  “Me?”

“Yeah.”  He sighed.  “She thought I spent too much time with you and not enough with her.”

“And she’s right.  You can’t expect . . .”

His eyes opened to see her uneasy expression.  “Don’t even think of saying it.  You’ve been my best friend since first grade and I’m not trading you in.  Not now or a year from now.”  When she still gave him a doubtful look, he shook his head.  “No girl, no matter who she is, is going to come between us.  Ever.  I promise.  Got it?”

“Josh, you can’t promise me . . .”

“I can and I will.”  His eyes locked with hers.  “I won’t let it happen, Jen.  Got it?”

“Y-yeah.  Yeah, I get it.”

“Good.”

They were silent for a few minutes before she finally spoke again.  “I wish you hadn’t . . .”

“Just let it go.”  He sighed.  “It’s over and done with.”

“Well, I’m still sorry you felt you had to do that.”  She gave him a small smile.  “But even you have to admit that things are gonna have to change sometime.  I mean . . . we’re growing up, Josh.  Starting high school.  It’s kind of obvious that we’ll both start to date.  And to tell you the truth, I can’t say that I would’ve acted any differently than Amanda if I was in her shoes.”

“That’s stupid.  Our friendship shouldn’t have to change just because of a girl . . . or a guy.”

“Maybe it shouldn’t.  But . . .”

“I really don’t think we need to talk about this right now.”  He shifted into a more comfortable position.  “We’re not even fourteen yet, Boof.  Let’s worry about this later, when it’s an issue.  Okay?”

“Okay, but we’ll have to talk it out sometime.”  Her eyes moved over him and she couldn’t help but wonder if they ever would talk about it.  “Promise?”

“Yeah, I promise.  Just not right now.”

“Okay.”  She grinned as she stared across the front yard.  “Your ‘coolness’ factor dropped, huh?”

“You could say that.”  He smiled.  “I’m not tops on her list, anyway.”

“Well, if it helps . . . you’ll always be the coolest guy I know.”

Sitting up quickly, he hugged her, his grin lifting his voice as he threatened playfully.  “I’d better be.”

----------------------------------------

February, 1991

“I bet you couldn’t.”

“I bet I could.”

“No way.  You’d freeze up on the spot.”

“That’s what you think.”

“Put your money where your mouth is.”

“Fine.  How much?”

“Forty bucks says that you freeze under the pressure.”

“Fifty says that I make the cut.”

“Brave man, raising the stakes.  You sure about that?”

“Positive.”

“Great.  When are the auditions?”

“The fifteenth of next month.”

“I’ll clear my calendar.”

“Clear your calendar of what?  Hot date?”

“Shut up, Josh.”

*********************

“I can’t believe they picked you!”

“Kind of excited, aren’t you?”

“Not as excited as you should be.  This is great!”

“I have to move to Florida, Jen.  For part of the year, anyway.”

“I know.”  There was a momentary silence on the line.  “I’ll miss you.”

“You’d better.  This is all your fault, you know.”

“My fault?  How is this my fault?”

“You shouldn’t have tried to bruise my ego.”

“Ha.  What ego?”

“Ouch.  That hurt.”

“Poor baby.  You can’t tell me you aren’t excited about this.”

“Are you kidding?  I’m ecstatic!  I’m going to be on TV!”

“Right on!  I’ll make sure to tape every episode, so I can’t miss it.”

“Since when do you watch the Disney Channel?”

“Since now.  Who knows?  I might capture some valuable black mail material.”

“Very funny.  Hey, Boof?”

“What?”

“Pay up.”

A growl carried over the line right before she slammed the phone down and he couldn’t help but laugh.

----------------------------------------

May, 1991 

“Jennifer!  Thank God you’re here!”

Jen froze in her tracks halfway across the Chasez’ front hallway.  “Um . . . hi, Aunt Karen.  What’s up?”

“He’s packing.  That’s what’s up.”  The woman pointed to the stairs.  “Go up there and straighten him out.”

“You want me to straighten him out?”  A brown eyebrow arched sharply.  “What’d he do?”

“It’s not what he did, it’s what he’s doing.”  Karen took a deep breath.  “He’s throwing everything all over the place and I really don’t think he knows what he wants to take with him and what he can leave . . . I can’t take it anymore!”

“So he’s just being the Josh we all know and love, huh?”

“The boy is driving me insane!”

Jen fought back the smile that was twitching at her lips.  “He hasn’t taken Heather or Tyler hostage and tried to pack them, has he?  This isn’t a rescue mission?”

“You’re rescuing me.”  Karen pushed her toward the stairs gently.  “Just wait until you see his room.  He needs you up there.  I need you to go up there.  Please . . . fix this, Jennifer.”

“Okay, okay.  I’ll see what I can do.”  Shaking her head, she ran up the stairs and down the hall until she was standing outside his bedroom.

At least, she thought it was his bedroom.  There were clothes, shoes, books, cassettes, videos and half empty suitcases covering every surface, leaving a small trail that led from the door to the closet and then to the bed.  The drawers in his dresser, desk and nightstand were all pulled open, some empty while others had their contents spilling over and onto the floor.  The items that had actually made it into the luggage weren’t in any order at all, just piled there as if he was waiting for someone to come behind him and make it work.

“Oh, my God . . .”  Her voice was soft with wonder as she looked around the room once again.  She couldn’t see him in the mess, but when a jacket flew from the closet onto the bed, she couldn’t help but smile as she stepped carefully into the room.  “I think you’re getting more on the floor than you’re getting packed, Josh.”

His head poked out of the closet and he gave her a quick grin.  “Hey!  When’d you get here?”

“About five minutes ago.”  Her eyes widened even further when she saw all the empty hangers still on the bar above his head.  “And I think I’m right on time.”

He’d already turned away, ducking back through the doorway to find . . . something.  “What?”

“Never mind.”  She just stood there for a few minutes, trying to figure out where to start first.  “Hey Josh?”

“Yeah?”

“Can you think of any reason why your mom was ready to kiss my feet when I walked in the front door?”

“She’s been trying to help me get this finished since eight this morning.  She finally gave up about twenty minutes ago.”  His upper torso leaned out of his closet as he passed her a stack of jeans and shorts.  “Could you put these in the suitcase on the bed?  I think that should finish up that one.”

“Why do I have to be the one to help you with this?”  She set the stack down on top of the piles of clothing already in the case, her eyes widening when she saw how it overflowed.

“Because you know I’ll be your best friend forever if you do.”

“You’d better be my best friend forever even if I didn’t.”

“Okay, you’ve got me, but you know you want to help me.”  He dropped down on his knees and rummaged around in the floor of the closet for a few seconds.  “Where are my black shoes?”

“You mean the ones by your feet?”  She watched as he snatched up the sneakers and put them right next to the closet door, then turned back to the mess on his bed.  “You’ll be back for a visit in a few months, right?”

“Yeah.”  His voice was muffled by the wall.

“Then why are you getting so freakish about this?”

“I’m not getting freakish.”

“Yeah, okay.”  She looked around at the disaster area his room had become and had to laugh.  “You might not be, but your mom is going to hit the roof when she sees this room.”

“Trust me, she’s seen it.  That’s why she’s so worked up.”

“She’s worked up?  Your mom?”  Her voice was laced with mock disbelief.  “No way.”

“Just get that suitcase closed, okay?”

“Yes, sir.”  With a sigh, she maneuvered the clothes until they were packed as tightly as she could get them, but the zipper wouldn’t budge.  She climbed up and sat on top of the case, leaning over to try and work the zipper along the track, but it still refused to move.  “Good Lord, Josh.  Are you afraid you won’t be able to do laundry down there?”

“No, I just want to make sure that I have options.”  He walked out of the closet carrying four different pairs of shoes.  “You never know what’s going to come up.”

“So you’re just taking everything you own?”  She climbed off the bed and lifted the case open again, her eyes narrowing at the messy pile inside.

The shoes landed in a heap on the other side of the bed.  “I’m not taking everything.”

“Oh, that’s right.  I forgot that you were leaving the tuxedo you wore in your cousin’s wedding four years ago.”  Her sarcasm was thick as she dug through the fabrics in the case.  “What all do you have in here?”

“The stuff I think I’ll need.”  He watched her for a second.  “What are you doing?”

“ . . . eight, nine, ten . . . You’re taking ten sweatshirts?  Josh, it’s the middle of summer and you’re going to be in Florida.  You won’t need ten sweatshirts between tomorrow and when you come home for that long weekend in September.  Especially since they’ll be running you through their wardrobe people for whatever you wear on the show.”  She pulled out the stack of thick shirts and passed them over to him.  “I’d think that three or four would be plenty.  Pick out your favorites and set them right here.”

Taking the stack of shirts, he eyed her warily as she walked around the bed to where he’d piled some other stuff to go through and pushed it all off the comforter and onto the floor.  “Are you crazy?  What are you doing?”

“Forget about everything but your clothes for right now.  They’ll take the longest, but it’ll give you a better idea of what else you’ll have room to take with you, and it’ll go faster if you take it one suitcase at a time.”  She arched an eyebrow at him and pointed at the shirts he was still holding.  “Are you finished with those yet?”

Thirty minutes later, the suitcase was repacked tightly and neatly, and everything that he’d decided to leave behind had been either put back in the dresser or hung in the closet, clearing up much of the floor.  She smiled in satisfaction as the zipper moved around, securing the case easily.  “And we didn’t even have to sit on it.  See?  That wasn’t so hard, was it?”

He looked doubtfully around the room.  “There’s still an awful lot that didn’t fit.”

“That’s what the other four cases are for.  Help me get this to the hall.”  Together, they pulled the case from the bed and lugged it out into the hallway.  “This one has most of your shirts and all of your jackets, shorts, pajamas, socks and underwear.  By the time we get finished, you’ll have enough there so that you won’t wear the same thing twice in two weeks and you’ll have some nicer stuff for if you go out.”

His arm tightened around her shoulders and he gave her a quick kiss on the cheek before he turned and went back into the room, picking up a few sweaters to hang in the closet on his way through.  “You’re a lifesaver, Jen.”

She looked down at the case in the hallway, biting her lip when she felt a heavy weight settling around her heart at the evidence that he was really leaving.  This time tomorrow, he’d be on a plane heading for the land of Mickey Mouse and beaches . . . leaving her behind.  Her eyes moved over to the empty suitcase lying next to his bed, wishing that she could fold herself up into it and go with him.

Blinking back the sudden sting of tears, she took a deep breath and walked into the room, picking up the case she’d been looking at and putting it on the bed.

“Boof?  Are you okay?” 

Her head jerked up and she found him looking at her, his eyes narrowed in concern.  Clearing her throat quickly, she forced a smile and reached for the pairs of shoes lying next to her feet.  “Yeah.  I’m fine.  Let’s get this one finished and that should be it for your clothes.”

They worked quietly for a few minutes, the case filling up quickly.  “There’s a few pictures I want to take.  Let’s put them between some of the shirts so they won’t get broken.”  He moved to the dresser and picked up three frames before walking back to the bed, where he began passing the remaining clothing to her, watching as she arranged everything so that it would fit.  “I think that’s all for that one.”  He eyed the case critically.

“O-okay.”  She’d kept herself together as she situated first the shoes, then the belts, jeans and dress pants, but when he handed her three of his flannel button-down shirts . . . she paused to pick up the shirt on the top of the stack. 

Her fingers ran over the soft fabric of the blue and green checkered shirt . . . his favorite.  She was always forgetting a jacket and he’d always been quick to give her whatever extra shirt he had with him.  More often than not, it was this one.  It was oversized on him – huge on her – and comfortable, it smelled of him even when it had just been washed and it was always warm, as if he’d just taken it off.

The sobs built in her chest and she tore her eyes away from the material, forcing herself to look at something else . . . anything else.  Unfortunately, her gaze landed on the pictures he’d laid out for her to pack and she had to swallow hard, trying to force down the lump that had formed in her throat.

He’d picked out the portrait of his family, of course, but the other two frames were what made her want to cry.

The first was an older picture of the two of them on the playground of their elementary school.  They’d been sitting on the swings, in the exact same spot where they’d met, and while she couldn’t remember exactly what it was that he’d said, he’d put her in hysterics.  She was on the left side of the photo, her head tilted back as she laughed, while he sat on the swing next to her, smiling as he watched her.

The second was, again, of the two of them, this one from their eighth grade graduation.  They were standing together, his arm around her shoulders and hers around his waist, their smiles happy as they posed for the picture next to the gym.  The ceremony itself had been long, boring and totally unnecessary, but she was glad that it had given them an opportunity to make a memory of another milestone in their lives.  That transition from grade school to high school had been an awkward thing to go through, but they’d worked it out.

Together.

For as long as she could remember, it’d been that way.  They’d worked together, been a team . . . attached at the hip, as her mother would say.  They’d watched each other’s back, stood up for each other . . . and, while they each had other friends that they talked and hung out with, there wasn’t another person on the planet that she trusted as much as she trusted him.  She knew that she could go to him about anything and that he’d not only keep it to himself, but he would understand what she was saying.

Her mother had always told her that they’d probably be split up after they graduated high school, had warned that they needed to branch out and make new friends, so they’d be able to do it when they were separated at different universities.  As immature as it may be, she’d always just assumed that they’d go to the same college.  They’d stuck by each other this far, why couldn’t they stick together then?

But now . . . here she was, helping him get packed to move nearly a thousand miles away.

They weren’t even fifteen yet, let alone old enough for college, and he was already leaving her.  It didn’t matter that he’d be coming back fairly often, hopping a plane whenever the show took a break for a few days or even the weeks between seasons, when the network would air reruns . . . her mind could accept that, but her heart felt as though it were being torn in half, as if she were packing up a part of herself and sending it away.

Her eyes came back to the shirt in her hands and she felt the tears welling up again.

Clearing her throat, she finally found her voice.  “Josh?”

“Yeah?”

His voice was closer than she’d expected and she turned to find him next to her, his eyes moving up from the photos on the comforter to meet hers.  “I . . . I know it’s your favorite . . . and it’s okay if you say no . . .”  She swallowed hard as the moisture in her eyes came closer to spilling over.  “Can I keep this?”

The first tear ran down her cheek and he wrapped his arms around her, hugging her tightly.  “It’s yours.  Anything you want, just name it and it’s yours.”  He could feel her shaky breathing and wasn’t surprised when the shirt was dropped to the ground, her arms going around his neck as she sobbed into his shoulder.

There was a sound in the doorway and he looked up to find his mother standing there, concern etched across her features.  “Is she okay?” was mouthed silently.

He nodded as he felt his own tears threatening, watching her walk back down the hall before closing his eyes and leaning down until his forehead rested against the girl’s trembling shoulder.  “It’ll be all right, Jenny.  I promise.”  His voice was weak, the first of his tears falling to soak into her shirt.

“You’re leaving.”  Her hold tightened desperately, her voice hoarse.

“I know.”  He raised his head, taking a deep breath.  “I wish I could take you with me, but I can’t.”

They stood there silently for a while, holding each other as they let the tears run out.  Finally she pulled away from him, her fingers rubbing the moisture from her cheeks.  “Sorry.  I kinda lost it there, didn’t I?”

“It’s okay.  I was right there with you.”  He bent down, picking up the shirt and shaking it out.  “Turn around.”  When she obeyed, he draped the shirt over her shoulders, smiling slightly when he saw how the fabric hung loosely around her.  His hands gripped her shoulders gently as he turned her back around to face him.  “If you start missing me, just . . . just wear this, okay?  It’ll be like I’m right here giving you a hug.  I know it’s not exactly the same thing, but it’s the best I can do.”

“I know.”  She nodded, putting her arms through the sleeves.  “This . . . it’s not easy, you know?  I don’t want you to go, but I know that you’d be a complete idiot to pass this up and I’d kill you if you did, but I just needed to get it off my chest and you know how I hate all that clingy, girly, mushy crap, but still . . .”

“It’s gonna be rough in the beginning, but I’ll be on the phone with you as much as I’m able.”  He cut off her rambling.  “I’ll be home at least once a month during taping then for the weeks between seasons.  We can hang out and be normal then.”

“It just . . . it’s not gonna be the same.”

“I know it’ll be different for us, but that doesn’t mean that everything has to change.”  He sat down on the bed and pulled on her arm until she was sitting next to him.  “We’ll be as close as always, I just won’t be right here with you.”  A small grin lifted his features.  “At least you’ll be able to see me pretty much everyday, right?”

“Well . . . yeah.”

“Between the TV, phone and the time I’ll get to be home, you won’t even have a chance to miss me.”

“Don’t be so sure about that, Josh.”  She looked down, pushing the sleeves of his shirt up until her hands were free of the fabric.  “I’d miss you just as much if your face wasn’t going to be plastered across my TV on weekday afternoons.”  Her fingers played with the bracelet circling her wrist, her gaze zeroing in on the medium sized dark metal beads and an idea popped in her head.  “Take this with you.”

“Wait a second.”  His eyes widened when he saw her unclasping the bracelet.  “Jen, your Dad gave you that bracelet.”

“Right.  Just like yours gave you this shirt.”

“It’s not the same and you know it.  Shirts like that one are all over the place.  If something happens to it, I can always get another one.  You can’t get another bracelet and say that it was your Dad’s.” 

“Josh . . .”  Her eyes narrowed as she concentrated on latching the beads around his left wrist.  “I haven’t taken this off since he died.  It’s important to me.  Just like you are.”  The bracelet clicked into place and she turned it so that the clasp was at the base of his palm.  “It’s a little loose, but I think it’s a perfect fit.”  She tilted her head, a small smile curving her lips.  “It looks good on you.”

“Jen . . .”

“I wouldn’t trust anyone else with it.”  She turned her eyes up to meet his.  “Wear it.  Take care of it for me.  And no matter what comes out of this whole Club thing – if you become famous and go off to be in the movies and on the radio, or if you just end up coming back here to Bowie – then you’ll know that you’ve always got a fan in me.”

He sat there quietly, staring down at his wrist, his eyes moving carefully over the beaded chain.  “You’re sure?”

“Positive.”

The tone of her voice was sad, drawing his gaze back up to her.  “Okay.”  He leaned over until his shoulder nudged hers.  “How about a smile, then?”

“A smile?”

“Yeah.  Come onnnnn . . .”  His fingers tickled her side as he cajoled her.  “Give me that Jenny smile that always makes my day.”

She cringed away from his fingers, trying her best to keep a straight face.  “Why should I smile?”

“Because I’m not doing too good of a job if my number one fan is all sad.”  He tickled her again.  “I’m supposed to be entertaining, not depressing.”

Twisting to get away from him, she slipped off the bed and fell flat on the floor, screaming when he followed her down.  She rolled, desperate to crawl away from him, but he caught her, expertly flipping her over on her back and pinning her down.  Her hands pushed against his shoulders, sending him toppling to the side and giving her room to escape, but she was laughing too hard to get very far before he caught her again.

Back and forth they fought, until they were finally lying flat on their backs, gasping for breath and just too worn out from laughter to get up.

He looked over to catch her wiping her eyes and grinning up at the ceiling, her chest heaving as she tried to calm down.  “Ah.  There it is.”

The smile disappeared immediately and brown eyes shifted over to him, their brightness betraying her efforts to keep the corners of her mouth from raising again.  “Yeah, okay.  You win.”

Standing up, he offered her a hand, waiting until his fingers were securely around hers before pulling her up next to him.  “Feeling better?”

“Yeah.”  She nodded, turning her hand so that she could give his fingers a squeeze.  “Like you said, it’ll be okay.”

“It will be.”  He hugged her once again, his cheek resting on the side of her head.  “I’m gonna miss you, too, Boof.”

She pulled back, an eyebrow raised as she stared at him seriously.  “You’d better miss me.”  The battle was lost, the grin reappearing as she punched him on the shoulder gently.  “Just don’t let those Florida girls make you forget the little people back home, okay?”

His eyes moved over her, from the top of her head, over her bright smile, then on down her confident stance to her crossed arms and finally to the toes of her shoes, peeking out from under the baggy legs of her jeans.  He finished his perusal, bringing his gaze up to take in the full picture of her standing there, swallowed whole by his favorite shirt, and couldn’t keep from grinning.

“Are you kidding?”  He laughed as he moved past her, reaching up to tug on her hair playfully.  “Why would I want a Florida girl when I already have you?”

August, 1992

She chewed on her lip, staring down at the sheet music in front of her with concentration before leaning forward to make a few notes in the margin of the page.  Taking a deep breath, she leaned back against her pillows, trying to relax before taking it again from the top.

Her patience was wearing thin, frustration setting in as she battled to get the sound required for the assigned piece.  She closed her eyes, running through the strum patterns and chord changes in her mind before sitting up, resting the guitar on her crossed legs.  Putting the pencil between her teeth, she bit into the wood as her fingers strummed quickly, finding the correct rhythm at last.

Three minutes later, she’d spit the pencil out, her eyes narrowing as she played it through two more times, grinning when she was satisfied with both turns.

“Yes!” 

The guitar was placed safely on the comforter before she leaped off the bed, both arms raised above her head as she did a quick victory dance around the room.  She slammed into the wall in mid-turn and sent herself sprawling to the floor, knocking her head against the dresser as she went down.  Her groan echoed off the walls as she shook her head, blinking quickly to get the room to stop spinning.

The phone on her desk began to ring and she tried to sit up, thinking better of it when her head spun again.  Twisting around, she crawled across the room, reaching up blindly until she finally pulled the handset away from the cradle and to her ear.  The room spun once more, wobbling in front of her as she sat with her back against her nightstand. 

“Oh, God.”  She realized that she was speaking into the phone and quickly corrected herself.  “I mean . . . hello?”

There was a silence on the other end before an unsure male voice came over the line.  “Uh, hi.  Is . . . is this the Lawson residence?”

“Um, yeah.”

“Oh, good.  For a second I thought I’d dialed the wrong number.”  He cleared his throat.  “Is Jennifer there?”

“You’ve got her.”  Her fingers massaged the sore spot just behind her temple.  “Good Lord, that hurts.”

There was a strange choking sound on the other end, but she was too distracted to care that he was laughing at her.  “As much as I’d love to know what you’re talking about, I’m going to steer far away from it.”

“Sorry.  I hit my head on the dresser when I fell.”

“Ouch.  Are you okay?”

“I think so.  I’m just seeing all kinds of spots.”  She blinked slowly.  “And the room keeps spinning.”

“Okay.”  His tone was bewildered.  “What exactly were you doing when you fell?”

“A happy dance.”

“A . . . a happy dance?”

“Yeah.  But I hit the wall.”  Her mind slowly focused.  “Wait, wait, wait.  Who is this?”

“Tony.”

“Tony?”  She closed her eyes and rested her forehead against her knees, trying to place the name but drawing a blank.  “Okay, Tony.  My brain’s pretty much soup right now, so you’re going to have to help me out here.  Do I even know a Tony?”

“Well, I guess you do.  Kind of.  By association.”  It was obvious that he was trying not to laugh.  “Tony Lucca.”

“Lucca . . .”  After a second, it finally clicked.  “Oh, right!  Tony Lucca.  You’re in the Club with Josh.”

“Yeah.”  He was silent for a second.  “Wait.  You’re a friend of Josh’s?”

“What?”  Her brow wrinkled in confusion.

“You know Josh?”

“Of course I know Josh.  He’s like my brother.”

“He’s like your brother?”

“Well, yeah.  The last time I checked, he was.”  She pulled the phone away, staring at it in frustration before moving it back up to her ear.  “I’ve known him for as long as I can remember.”

“Hang on, I think I might have the wrong number after all.”  His voice became muffled, evidence that he was speaking to someone else in the room with him.  “This is Jen, Chasez’s friend, right?”

“Right.  Jen would be me.”  Her head shook back and forth in irritation as she groaned.  “As if that made any sense.”

“Okay, great.”  Quiet laughter carried over the line.  “So you’re not some friend of Ackerman’s?”

“Ackerman?  Who’s . . . ”  Her voice trailed off as it finally made sense.  “Oh, I get it.  You’re talking about the other Josh.”

“Other Josh?”  She could hear his confusion.  “Do we have more than one?”

“Crap, I keep forgetting that you guys call him JC.  My Josh is your JC.”  A sigh escaped.  “Can we just start this whole conversation over?”

“Nope, sorry.  I think we’re on the right track now, anyway.”  His smile carried on his voice.  “You’re JC’s friend Jen and I’m JC’s friend Tony.  If that’s straight, then we’re good.” 

“Okayyy . . .”  She drew the word out, giving herself a second to gather her thoughts.  “So, Tony Lucca who’s in the Club with JC . . .”

“Yes?”

“What can I do for you?”

“Oh, that’s right.  I actually had a reason for calling.”

His flustered tone brought a smile to her face.  “You did?  And here I thought you just wanted to hear a random girl make a complete idiot of herself.”  He laughed again and she decided that she liked the sound.  “And that reason would be . . . what, exactly?”

“Well, you know his birthday’s coming up this weekend.”

“Right.  Sunday.”

“We were gonna throw him a party after the show on Friday.  Make it a surprise and all that.”

“Ahh.  Cool.”  She pushed herself up from the floor, carefully settling down in her desk chair.  “He’ll appreciate that.  Just . . . if you get a cake, make sure it’s chocolate.  It’s kind of a tradition with him.”

“Really?”  His surprise was obvious.  “Well, I guess that would explain the cupcake thing from last year.”

“Cupcake thing?”

“Yeah.  He went out and got one of those Hostess cupcakes . . . wait, we’re getting off track again.”  He cleared his throat.  “Where were we?”

“Birthday party.  Friday after the show.  I suggest a chocolate cake.”  Her elbow propped on the desktop, her forehead dropping into her hand as she tried not to laugh out loud.  “Do you need a gift idea or something?”

“Actually, no.  We’ve already thought of the perfect present, but we need your help to pull it off.”

“Okay.”

“When do you go back to school?”

Her eyes moved over to the calendar.  “Like the 18th or something.  Not for a few weeks.”

“Great.”

“Tony . . . spit it out.  What do you need me to do?”

“Could you fly down here for the weekend?”

She stared down at the desk, thinking she must have heard him wrong.  “You’ll have to run that by me again.  You want me to what?”

“Fly down here for the weekend.”  Her mouth opened, ready to tell him how crazy that was, but he barreled on before she could make a sound.  “I know it’s short notice, but the older cast members have pooled our money together . . . we have enough for a round trip ticket from Maryland to Florida.  I’ve checked it out, and we could get you on an early flight Friday morning, so that you’d be here for the show that afternoon.”

“Are you serious?”

“Yeah.  You know that he hates spending his birthday here, when his family’s up there.  Usually his dad is here, but he’ll be leaving out Wednesday for some kind of training deal he has to do in Chicago.  He won’t be back until next week.  Like, Wednesday or Thursday.  JC’s going to be stuck here by himself and . . . well, that kind of sucks.  We want to surprise him by having you here to celebrate with him this year.”

“That’s . . . that’s really nice of you guys.”  Her teeth worked on her lip.  “You know that’s too much for a birthday present, right?”

“This is going to be birthday and Christmas rolled up into one.”

She fell silent as she thought about it.  “Round trip.  How many days are we talking about?”

“Well, I figured it’d be better to check with you first.  You can go back anytime you want, but I need to have an idea of how long you’ll be here before I book the flights.”  Pages began rustling on his end of the line.  “You could just stay for the weekend or you could hang around for a few days.  No matter when you leave, it won’t affect the price.”

“Okay.”

“Well, what do you think?  Can you make it?”

“God, I’d love to fly down there and see him.”  Her fingers combed through her hair.  “I’ll have to talk it over with my mom, but I think it’s possible.”  The sound of the front door opening carried up the stairs and she turned to look out into the hall.  “Listen, can I call you back in about an hour?”

“Sure.”

“What’s the number?”  She grabbed a pen and scribbled as he rattled off the digits to her.  “All right, Tony.  I’m going to be as persuasive as I can and try to work something out.  I’ll let you know in a bit, okay?”

“Okay.  Good luck.”

“Thanks.”

She reached over to hang up the phone, then stood and stretched.  Moving quickly over to the dresser, she stared at herself in the mirror, practicing the hopeful look that always got her what she wanted.  “Okay, here we go.  Josh.  Florida.”  She turned to walk out of the room, talking softly to herself.  “Going to Florida for his birthday.”  A smile crossed her face.  “If that’s not motivation, I don’t know what is.”

*********************

Friday

Her eyes moved around the crowd at the gate, wondering how she was supposed to recognize anyone.  Someone bumped into her from behind, pushing her to the side, and she stepped back, moving to lean against the wall and continue her perusal of the faces.

It took a few minutes, but she finally focused on a younger guy holding a little sign that had her name on it.  Sighing in relief, she slung her duffel over her shoulder and pushed her way through the crowd toward him.

“Hi.  I think you’re looking for me.”

He turned to face her, his eyes widening as he got a good look at her.  “Whoa.  Um . . . you’re Jen?”

“In the flesh.”  She noticed how his eyes moved over her again and gave him a tentative smile.  “And you are?”

“Oh . . . right.”  Shaking his head, he extended a hand for her to shake.  “Tony.”

“Ah . . . the infamous Tony.”  Her laugh carried over the terminal noises.  “You’d think I’d recognize you from watching the show.”  She paused when he gave her yet another look over.  “So . . . do I look like the crack head you pictured?” 

“No.  Definitely not.  Far from it.”  He cleared his throat, reaching out to take her bag.  “Actually, I’ve seen a few pictures of you . . . but you’re not exactly the same, are you?”

“I’ve grown up a little since eighth grade.”

“You don’t say.”  His smile grew as he took her arm, gently pulling her away from the crowd.  “Do you have any other bags or is this it?”

“That’s it.”

“Okay, let’s get you out of here.”  He led the way, going out a side exit and walking quickly to the closest parking structure.  “Sorry for the rush.  I had to pull in a few favors to get free so I could come pick you up and I really need to be back in time for . . .” 

“Hey, it’s no problem.  I needed a run today anyway.”  She laughed.  “Josh isn’t exactly the easiest person to surprise, is he?”

“No, he’s not.  It’s like he knows everything.”  They stopped beside a blue car and she waited while he put her bag in the trunk and unlocked the door.  “It’s a mess, but there’s nothing in here that’ll bite you, I promise.”

With a grin, she slid into the passenger seat, fastening her seatbelt as he got comfortable behind the steering wheel and started the engine.  “So, how’s this going to work?”

“The skits for the show start filming in about half an hour.  I arranged to be the last person suited up so that I could run you by to drop off your bags and stuff before we head to the studio, but you only have the one bag, so we’ll just go straight there.”  He paused his thought to check both ways, then pulled into traffic.  “I figure we’ll hide you in the audience during the taping, since it’d kind of suck if you came all the way down here and then didn’t get to see everybody in action . . .”

“Well, I’ll be here for a week, so I wouldn’t worry too much about me catching the show, but I think that’ll work.  He’ll be too into what he’s doing to even notice who’s in the crowd.  I think you probably need to worry more about where you put me before show time.”  Her fingertips played with the switch for the automatic windows.  “Are you going to hide me somewhere or is it safe for me to just walk around?”

“You can hang out in the girls’ dressing room until they start letting the audience in, then one of us will sneak you out there.”

“And then, after the show . . .”

“Party time.  They’ll clear out the audience, we’ll go get ourselves back to normal and then we’re just going to use the set.  Music, dancing and all that jazz.”  His eyes slid over to her.  “Maybe by the time he gets over the fact that you’re here, he’ll have some time to dance with you.”

“You make it sound like he . . . like he gushes over me or something.”  She shook her head.  “He doesn’t.”

“That’s what you think.”  A knowing grin lit his features.  “I’ve seen how he stares at your picture when he’s on the phone with you.  You’re . . . you’re his Boof, whatever that’s supposed to mean.  He won’t explain it to me.”  Questioning eyes moved over to her.  “Care to shed some light?”

“Nope, I don’t.  If he doesn’t want you to know, then I’m not gonna be the one to spill the beans.”

“I didn’t think you would.”  Slender shoulders rose in a sigh.  “Anyway, he talks about you more than he talks about his family.”

“Okay, so we’re close.  He’s the closest thing to a brother that I’ve ever had.  But that’s all.”  Her eyebrow arched at him.  “Surely you’ve figured out that guys and girls can be just friends.”

“Oh, I know that.  But I’ve never seen two people as close as you guys are without there being something more.”

She looked up when he turned into a parking lot.  “We’re best friends.  That’s all there is to it.”  Her eyes focused on the building across the lot, taking a deep breath as she thought about him being inside those walls.  “The couple stuff has been said before and that’s not what we’re about.”

“Okay, okay.  I’ll buy that.”  He put the car in park and turned to look at her.  “Since you two are just friends . . . think I could have a dance or two?”

Her perplexed look quickly became a grin as she met his smiling eyes.  “Sure.  I still have to prove to you that I’m really not all whacked out in the head.”

“You’re best friends with Jace and you just agreed to dance with me.  I’d say that makes you pretty twisted.”  His laughter rang out as he opened the door.  “Come on.  He’s gonna go nuts when he finds out you’re here.”

*********************

The ending music finally faded out and the entire cast made a mad dash to get off the set, more than ready to get out of the stage clothing and into their own.

“Hey Jace!”

He turned when he heard the yell, finding Josh still standing on the set.  “What’cha need, Ackerman?”

“Can we run over Break It Down Again before you head to the house?”

His eyes narrowed.  “I thought we weren’t using that one this season?”

“Yeah, I know.  I just want to make sure it’s still good, since we haven’t done it in a while.”

“Okay.  Let me go get changed and stuff.”

“Meet me back here?”

“Yeah.”

Turning back around, he jogged off the set and into the wings, not paying a bit of attention to the people moving around behind him as he made a bee line for the guys’ dressing room.

Twenty minutes later, he’d showered to get all the stage make-up washed off and was pulling an over-sized T-shirt over his head, not caring that his hair was still wet.

He had just knelt down to tie his shoelaces when Josh’s head came through the doorway.  “You still alive in here, Jace?”

“Man, take it easy.  I’m working on it.”  His voice lowered to a growl.  “You can’t give a guy time to shower and change?  What’s the hurry, anyway?  You got a big date?”

“You could say that.”  Josh leaned against the doorjamb with a grin.  “Hurry up.”

“Okay, okay.”  Finishing up with the laces, he stood and pushed his way through the door.  “Let’s get this over with.”  He took off down the hallway, making the younger boy rush to catch up, grumbling the entire way back to the set.

Josh kept pace with him as they moved through the wings and onto the set, laughing softly when he saw how his friend’s head was down, his eyes on the floor, completely unaware of the crowd of people standing quietly in front of them.  “Jace, man.  Check this out.”

“What?”  His head turned to look at Josh, then . . .

“Surprise!”

He jerked around with a jump when he heard the yell, his eyes widening when he saw the people crowded around a table in the middle of the set.  “Whoa . . . what . . .”

“Happy birthday, C.”  Tony stepped forward, clapping a hand over his shoulder.  “Not all of us could make it on Sunday, so we’re partying today.”

“Wow.”  Music started playing on the speakers around the set and a bright grin spread across his features.  “Thanks, guys.  This is awesome.”

The whole group started milling around, talking, laughing and dancing to the upbeat music.

“You haven’t seen it all yet.”  Tony pushed him over to the table holding a large sheet cake.  “Chocolate, as per tradition.”

“Wait.”  His brows knit in confusion.  “How’d you know about the chocolate cake?”

“I made a few phone calls.  You know some pretty cool people.”

“Yeah, right.”  An eyebrow arched in distrust.  “How’d you really find out about it?”

Tony’s eyes focused on something on the other side of the room and he couldn’t help but grin.  “Forget how I knew.  Why don’t you take a look at your present?”

“There’s more?”  JC’s head shook back and forth.  “Man, the party was plenty.”

“Maybe, but I think you’ll like this.  Turn around.”

“Why?”

“Because it just walked in.”

“Oh, God.”  He ran his fingers through his hair, closing his eyes with a sigh.  “Tony . . . I don’t care if you’re my friend.  If you’ve dragged out another of those girls you like so much for me, I’m going to kill you.”

“Jace . . . just turn around.”  When he still didn’t move, Tony reached out and grabbed his arm, physically turning him.  “I tried to put a big pink bow on it, but I was kind of afraid that I’d lose a hand or an arm or something.”

“Good call.  I can’t be held responsible for the violent tendencies I get when I’m around pink.”

JC’s eyes flew open at the female voice, widening in surprise when he saw her standing there.  Silently, his gaze moved over her from head to foot, studying her as if trying to make sure that she wasn’t a figment of his imagination.  “Jen?”

“I’m not that shocking, am I?”  She gave him a bright smile.

“What . . . how’d you get here?”  He blinked quickly.  “You are really here, right?”

Her arms crossed over her chest, a dark eyebrow arching sarcastically.  “No, I’m having an out of body experience.”

Almost cautiously, he reached up so that his fingers could tug gently at her hair, an affirmation that she was really standing in front of him.  “Okay . . . but how . . . why are you here, Boof?”

“As if it isn’t obvious.”  She gave an exaggerated roll of her eyes.  “I’m here because you have some friends who are out of this world and wanted to give you an awesome birthday.  Now thank them so you can give me a hug.”

“I think the hug should come first.”  The words weren’t even out of his mouth before he took a quick step forward, wrapping his arms around her waist, pulling her so tightly against him that her feet left the floor.  He grinned when he felt her forehead rest against his shoulder and her arms go around his neck, the fingers of her right hand threading through his hair.   She sighed against him and he instinctively began swaying side to side, pressing his lips to the side of her head, not caring one bit that all eyes were on them.

After a few minutes, she pulled back as well as she could with him holding her off the ground.  “Josh . . . I can’t breathe.”

“If I let you go, you’ll disappear.”

His words were soft, nearly swallowed by the loud music, but she heard them all the same.  “No I won’t.  Not for a week, anyway.”

Blue eyes opened, zeroing in on her face.  “Promise?”

“Yeah, I promise.”  She felt her feet touch the floor, but he still didn’t release her.  Tilting her head, she let her gaze move over his face.  “Hey . . . are you okay?”

“I’m fine.”  He gave her one last squeeze, then let her go for only a second, his hands grasping her shoulders gently as a smile lifted the corners of his mouth.  “I’m just really glad to see you.”

“Um . . . okay.”  Suddenly, she became aware of all the stares directed on them.  Clearing her throat, she offered him a grin.  “Well, it looks like you have their attention.  Maybe now would be a good time for you to . . . you know, thank them.”

He looked around quickly, his grin growing by the second.  “You guys are the greatest.  Thank you so much.  This is . . . wow.”  Even as he spoke, his eyes kept coming back to her.  She never noticed, as she was busy trying to keep from focusing on any one person for too long, certain that she’d be on the receiving end of those knowing looks she’d been subject to since they’d turned eleven.

“This is the best present I’ve ever gotten.”  His voice drew her attention, her mind centering on him in time to return the smile he was giving her.  Not two seconds later, he’d pulled her back into his arms, swaying in time with the slow song that carried over the speakers.  Over his shoulder, her gaze fell on Tony, standing a few feet away with that familiar ‘yeah, right’ look on his face, an eyebrow arching when her eyes met his.

Her forehead furrowed in frustration and she shook her head at him in denial.  Then she allowed herself to simply enjoy that she was there, that they were together, and with a soft sigh she dismissed the whole idea.

*********************

 Sunday 

He stretched under the covers, sighing deeply as he came awake.  Pulling the blanket tighter around him, he fought against the bright light shining in his face, refusing to leave behind the peaceful sleep he’d been enjoying.

Then the smell of something cooking hit his nose, immediately forcing his eyes open.  “Pancakes?”  His eyes narrowed at the ceiling as he took a deep breath, inhaling the delicious aroma.  “She’s seriously fixing pancakes?”  Without a second thought, he threw back the covers and rolled out of bed, running his fingers through his disheveled hair with a yawn as he walked out into the living room area of the apartment.

Music was playing in the kitchen and he could hear her humming along, something making a clattering noise as she dropped it into the sink.  He was already grinning by the time he’d made it into the doorway, stopping to cross his arms over his chest and lean against the door frame, fighting not to laugh out loud as he watched her.

She’d already showered and dressed, her worn blue jeans secured around her waist with what appeared to be a Native American beaded belt, the ends of it hanging below the loose-fitting Mickey Mouse Club tee shirt that one of the crew members had dug out for her.  Her dark hair was still damp, secured into a ponytail, the strands softening as they dried in the heat from the stove.

“Now I believe in miracles, and a miracle has happened tonight . . .”  Her sock-clad feet made her move easily as she spun on the linoleum and, using the pancake turner as a makeshift microphone, she let go and sang along with the Michael Jackson tune pouring from the radio on the counter.  “But if you’re thinkin’ about my baby, it don’t matter if you’re black or white.”

Bopping her head to the beat, she stepped back to the stove, flipping the pancakes in the pan before setting the turner down on the counter and reaching for the door of the refrigerator, imitating the guitar riffs vocally as she pulled out a pack of bacon.  The package was deposited on the counter next to the sink and she whipped around to dance back to the pancakes, flipping them once, twice, then giving a final pat with the turner before moving the finished cakes to the platter that already held a small stack of steaming, golden brown discs. 

“Protection, for gangs, clubs and nations, causing grief in human relations . . .”  She launched into the rap without missing a word, moving the platter of pancakes to the small table in the middle of the room and grabbing the bacon, ripping through the package and peeling out several slices to toss into the pan, where they immediately began to sizzle.

He bit his lip roughly, forcing himself into silence as her hips moved to the music, her hands busy with turning the bacon.  Leaving the meat to cook for a while, she took a few steps to the right, moving dirty dishes into the sink, clearing off part of the counter.  “If you’re thinkin’ of being my baby, it don’t matter if you’re black or white.”  A pop sounded from the pan and she turned once again, doing a weird combination of the Moonwalk and the Egyptian, moving backward until she was in front of the stove.

A few turns with the fork and she lifted the pan from the stove eye, carefully transferring the cooked bacon to the plate waiting on the counter then moved to put the pan in the empty side of the double sink.  Once it was down safely, she tilted her head back, raising her arm up and holding the fork toward the ceiling as she imitated the signature “Whoo!” at the end of the song.

Unable to hold it in any longer, he burst out in loud laughter, the sound making her jump in mid-spin.  The shocked movement made her feet cross over each other, tangling just enough to send her tumbling down onto the floor, the fork flying across the room to bounce harmlessly off the wall.  For a second, she just lay there, staring at the ceiling with a startled expression, then she began to turn a bright shade of red, her hands coming up to cover her face.

“I can’t believe you just caught me.”

He moved over and knelt down beside her, still laughing.  “I wish I had a video camera.  The only thing that could’ve made that better would’ve been catching it on tape.”  His fingers grasped her wrists gently, pulling her hands away from her face.  “Are you okay?”

“Yeah, I’m fine.”  She gave him an embarrassed grin and sat up.  “Enjoy the show?”

“You have no idea.”  He closed his eyes and took a deep breath, inhaling the aroma of the bacon.  “Since when do you cook?”

A short laugh escaped as she got to her feet.  “Since I took Foods as an elective last year.”

“Really?”

“Yeah.  It’s fun.”  She turned, picking up the plate of bacon and moving it to the table.  “Do you want eggs too, or is this enough?”

“Pancakes and bacon?  Yeah, that’s plenty.”

“Not just any pancakes . . . chocolate chip pancakes.”

“Seriously?”  He grinned, grabbing her into a quick hug.  “Boof, you rock.”

“I know.”  She handed him a plate and sat down.  “Dig in.”

His eyes widened as he watched her douse her pancakes in topping.  “You’re going to be bouncing off the walls by the time you finish that.”

“Well, it’s better than the alternative.”

“What’s wrong with Aunt Jemima?”

“Are you kidding?  Aunt Jemima shouldn’t go anywhere near chocolate chips.  That’s just disgusting.”  Her nose wrinkled and she passed him the containers she’d just finished using.  “Here.  Have fun.”

“Chocolate syrup and Reddi-Whip?”  His eyebrow rose at her.  “Are you eating pancakes or ice cream?”

“Just try it.”  She took a big bite, sighing as the mixture melted in her mouth.  “It’s good.”  Her eyes followed him as he picked up the bottle of syrup and stared at it for a second.

With a shrug, he took his time covering the pancakes, then proceeded to make quick work of the food, barely pausing to nod his approval.

She laughed softly, reaching to grab a piece of bacon from the plate, chewing thoughtfully until she suddenly remembered, jumping up from her seat.  “Be right back.”  As she left the room, she finished off the bacon, wiping her fingers on the legs of her pants to get rid of the grease before pawing through her duffel.  Her fingers closed over a small box and she smiled, lifting the lid to make sure the folded paper was still inside, then made her way back to the kitchen, dropping the box next to his plate as she sat down.  “Happy birthday.”

His eyebrow arched as he picked up the box.  “Expensive things come in small boxes.”

Shaking her head, she laughed.  “I like to think of it as ‘it’s the little things that count’.”

He sent her a quick smile, lifting the lid and tilting his head when he saw the paper.

“Heather printed this off for me.”  She reached out, unfolding the page for him.  “She was doing a paper or something on her zodiac sign for . . . I forget what class it was for, but she looked up the entire family.  I read this and thought it fit you perfectly.”

“Leo.”  His eyes moved over the page, narrowing as he read the highlighted words and phrases out loud.  “Generous.  Ambitious.  Spontaneously warm-hearted and plainspoken.  Faithful.  Courageous.  Never lacking in kindliness.  Strong-willed.  Enthusiastic.  Is open, sincere, genuine and trusting.  Creative.  Uncomplicated.  Knows what he wants and strives to achieve it.  Loving.”  He looked up, studying her carefully.  “You . . . you think this is me?”

“I know it’s you.”  She took another bite of her pancakes, chewing slowly as she thought out her next sentence.  “I’ve known you long enough to see every possible side of you, good and bad.  But those . . .”  Her fork gestured to the paper.  “Those are the things I love most about you.”  She watched as he pulled out the black corded necklace, his eyes focusing on the silver pendant hanging from it. 

“It’s a lion.”

“Your sign.  And even though I don’t totally buy into that whole thing where the positioning of the sun or stars or whatever at your time of birth has anything to do with how you turn out . . . I can’t argue with the description on that paper right there.”  She took the last bite of her sugary breakfast, letting her fork clatter down on her plate as she chewed.  “The only thing is, I don’t think you see that those qualities are what make you who you are.  I wanted to give you something that represented . . . well, you.  And the person I hope you’ll always be.”  Her cheeks turned slightly pink and she grinned, laughing lightly.  “I almost got the key chain, but I thought it’d be too tacky, so I went with the necklace instead.”

“I . . . wow.  I don’t know what to say.”  Fumbling with the clasp, he opened it easily, but had trouble getting it to latch around his neck.

“Here, let me help.”  She stood, walking around behind him to work on the necklace, fastening it quickly.  “Is it too tight?”

“Nope.  It’s good.”  He looked up at her, rising to his feet to pull her in for a hug.  “Thank you.  How can you take the smallest thing and make it mean something so much more?”

“It’s a gift, I guess.”  Her fingers patted the pendant, pressing it against his bare chest.  Then she met his gaze, her trademark bright grin lighting up her face.  “Either that, or I’m just really desperate to justify a cheap present.”

She laughed again and he let his eyes move over her face, forming a smile of his own as her voice bounced off the walls around them.  He studied her, taking note of the subtle changes in her appearance, the evidence that she was growing up.  Her eyelashes were longer, her cheeks thinner, the sprinkling of freckles across her nose – once jumping out at him – faded to the point of being barely noticeable.  The lines of her jaw and chin were more defined, appearing more stubborn and strong.  Her lips were still the same reddish color, the corners still turned up in a natural smile, but they were fuller, more pronounced.

No matter how she changed physically, he knew that her heart, her spirit, would always be the same.  She’d always be the light-hearted, sassy, stubborn, loyal, laughing, perfectionist Jen that he’d grown up with.  She would always know when he needed to be brought down a peg or two, when his ego needed a little deflating, and she’d be more than happy to tell him straight out that he was being a jerk and needed to adjust his attitude.  Without a doubt, he knew that she’d always have his back, that she’d do her best to keep him grounded . . . and that she’d keep him smiling while she was doing it.

 Never change, Jenny. 

“Do I have chocolate sauce on my face or something?”

Her voice pulled him out of his thoughts and he realized that she was staring at him.  “What?”

“You’re staring at me.”  She ran a hand over her mouth.  “Do I have something on my face, or am I just that gorgeous?”

“You’re just that gorgeous.”  He answered with a grin, laughing when her eyebrow arched and she turned away from him to clear the table.  “I was thinking.  Sorry.”

“Anything important?”  Her head turned, looking up from where she was stacking their plates together.

“Nah.  Nothing worth talking about.”  Picking up the dishes she couldn’t carry, he followed her over to the sink.  “You never did tell me what you thought about the show.”

“It was great.”  She turned on the water, her fingers testing the warmth before she put the stopper in the drain and added the soap.  “It was different to see it live and in person, though.  When it’s on TV, you can’t see all the crew people running around between skits and stuff.  They do a really good job of making it seem like it only takes half an hour and that you’re really seeing a live show.”

“And the video?”

“Your song was awesome, Josh.  Runaway Train was a really good pick for you.”

He gave her a questioning look.  “Why do I sense a ‘but’ coming?”

“Because there is.”  She laughed and picked up a washrag, starting in on the dishes.  “You sound good on all the other stuff, but your best sound is on Richard Marx songs.  Why haven’t they let you do one yet?”

“It’s never come up.  Why don’t you request one?”

“Yeah, they’re really gonna listen to me.”  Her voice pitched upward, imitating a little girl.  “Hi!  Could you please have JC sing Now and Forever for me?  It’s my fa-a-a-avorite!” 

“You never know.  It could work.”  He intercepted her doubtful look.  “Okay, so don’t talk to them.  Maybe I can work something out for next season.  Would that make you happy?”

“Extremely.”

“I’ll just tell them that my number one fan wants me to sing Now and Forever for her.  Dedication and all.”

“You wouldn’t dare.”

“Uh, yeah, I would.  What could you do about it?  Turn the TV off?”  Suds came flying his way and he laughed.  “You’d love that, wouldn’t you?  Admit it.”

“If there’s ever a dedication of any kind, I’ll reach right through that television screen and choke the life out of you.” 

“But what about all my other fans?”  His lower lip jutted out in a pout.  “You know they’d miss me, Boof.”

“Aww.  The poor babies.”  She grinned, tossing a drying towel to him.  “Now make yourself useful.”

He caught the fabric and saluted her.  “Yes, ma’am.”

“Don’t call me ma’am.”

A snicker escaped.  “Yes, sir.”

“Shut up.”

March, 1993

She groaned, running a hand roughly through her hair as she leaned forward to read the same paragraph over for what seemed to be the tenth time.  Or maybe it was the eleventh.

“Why won’t this stuff stick?  Seriously, how hard is it to explain the kinetic-molecular theory?”  Her eyes moved over the page once more and she let out a long sigh.  “Who am I kidding?  This may as well be in Latin.  God, I hate chemistry.”

Her elbow propped on the desk and her forehead fell into her hand, giving herself a minute to fight back the full blown panic that was building.  Taking deep breaths, she tried to calm down.  “It’s going to be okay.  It’s just one test.  If you fail it, you have a full grading period to make it up.  No biggie.  Just relax and . . .”

The phone rang next to her, bringing her out of her pep talk.  “So much for studying.”  Sighing again, she pressed the button on the handset and brought it to her ear.  “Hello.  You’ve reached the help desk.  Did you know that the kinetic-molecular theory states that a gas consists of molecules in constant, random motion?  This is just one of the many questions on my test tomorrow that I will undoubtedly get wrong.”  She took a deep breath.  “But enough about my problems.  How on Earth can I make your day better?”

“Whoa.”  The familiar laugh carried over the line, bringing a smile to her face instantly.  “Bad day, Boof?”

“Slightly.”  Her chin rested in her hand, her eyes moving over the book in front of her.  “I’ve had better, that’s for sure.”

“What’s going on?”

“Let’s just say chemistry sucks and leave it at that.”

“Ah.”  Understanding rang in his voice.  “Yeah, chemistry sucks.  Big test tomorrow?”

“Yep.”

“Are you ready for it?”

“Nope.  Not even close.”

“Should I let you go so you can study?”

“No, don’t go anywhere.  I think I’m just overly stressed this week.”  Her eyes dropped closed.  “I have this test tomorrow, an algebra test Wednesday, a term paper due on Thursday and a presentation for my speech class scheduled on Friday.”

“That’s . . . wow, Jen.  That’s a lot of stuff.”

“Yeah.”

“How’s it looking?”

“Well, the algebra is nothing.  Easy stuff.”

“Right.”

“And the paper and presentation are nearly finished.  The paper needs to be proof read and I need to time the speech, but that shouldn’t take more than fifteen minutes.”

“Okay, so you’re pretty much set except for the chemistry?”

“Yeah.  It’d be better if I didn’t have so much trouble with science, but there’s really nothing I can do about that.”

“Don’t stress over it so much and it’ll be easier.  Trust me.”

“Yeah, I know.”  She flipped the heavy book closed.  “Maybe I’ll just put the book under my pillow and hope to absorb it by osmosis.”

He laughed.  “Yeah, you could try that.  I wouldn’t count on it working, though.”

“Me, neither.”  Quietly, she got up from the desk chair and laid down on her bed, staring at the ceiling as she talked.  “So what’s up with you, Josh?  This isn’t your usual night to call.”

“No, I know.  I just . . . I guess I needed to vent and you were the only one I wanted to talk to.”

“Vent?  Is everything okay with the show?”

“Yeah, the show’s fine.”

“Awesome performance today, by the way.  Tell Blain that he’s more than welcome to call me up and sing me to sleep anytime.”

“I’ll definitely pass that along.”  His grin was obvious.  “How about that choreography?”

“The choreography?”  She blinked at the ceiling, trying to think of the right descriptive words.  “It was . . . it was . . .”

“Crazy.  And stupid.  I felt like an idiot up there, waving my arms around like a fool and the jumping and crap . . . it was awful.”

“But you did your job and you made it through it.”

“Yeah, I guess.”

“And the little girls ate it up.”

“Right.  That’s all that counts.”

His sarcastic response made her smile.  “Exactly.  You’re eye candy for the ’tweens.”  He groaned and she laughed.  “Seriously, Josh . . . it wasn’t all that bad.  Besides, you weren’t the only one up there.  Tony, Matt, Blain and Kevin had to do it, too.  With all of you together . . . the whole performance came out well.”

“Okay.”

“Do you feel better now?”

“About that, yeah.  Thanks.”

“Was there something else bothering you?”

“Well . . . yeah.  You just got me off track when you started talking about the show.”

“Oh, sorry.”  She settled her head further into her pillow.  “What’s wrong?  Vent away.”

He took a deep breath.  “Jennifer and I broke up.”

“Oh, man.  I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be.  I wasn’t counting on it lasting too long, anyway.”

“What happened?”

“The same old, same old.”

Her eyes narrowed at the ceiling.  “You have a usual reason for breaking up?  Josh . . . that’s not normal.”

“For me it is.”  He sighed.  “I accidentally let it slip that you and I went to a few movies when I was at home last month . . .”

“And she got mad, right?”

“Right.  You’d think I was cheating on her or something.”

“Well, to her . . . it probably seemed that way.”

“How?”

“You went to a movie with another girl, Josh.  That almost automatically constitutes a cheating situation.”

“Not when it’s you, it shouldn’t.”

“Uh, yeah.  No exceptions to that rule, I’m afraid.”

“Why not?  You’re going to have to explain this one to me.”

She sighed.  “Welcome to this tour of the female mind.  Please remain seated, with the seatbelt tightly secured and keep all hands and arms inside the car at all times . . .”

“Okay.  I’m entering dangerous territory.  I get it.”  He let out a short laugh.  “Just get on with it.”

“Look . . . when a girl is dating a guy, she wants to be the primary girl in his life.  Well, after his mother and sisters or whatever.  It’s common nature.  She focuses on you.  You focus on her.  Nobody else enters the picture.  Your basketball buddies or other guy friends are okay in limited quantities and time increments, but absolutely no outside female interference is allowed.  End of story.”

“But she’d met you and she knew . . .”

“Yeah, we met last year.  She wasn’t too keen on me, either.  And that was before you were dating.”  Her fingers picked at the comforter as she tried not to laugh out loud.  “I seriously think she was jealous that we had the same name.”

“That’s stupid, you know.”

“Uh huh.  But girls and jealousy are something even I’m not brave enough to try to explain.”  She sighed.  “We get jealous easily and quickly.  And when we think another girl is zeroing in on our territory . . . well, it can get vicious.  But ask us why . . . and we can’t tell you.  It’s nothing that can be explained without getting into all those different brain chemicals and attitudes and crap.  Probably something you should take up with a psychologist.”

“And you’re not a psychologist.”

“Nope.”

“I still don’t get it.  She knew about you going in . . .”

“Josh, she probably didn’t know exactly what she was getting herself into.”

“How could she not have known?  Like I said before . . . she’d met you.”

“We were around each other for a few days.  There’s no way she could’ve gotten the entire picture while I was down there for your birthday.”

“Okay . . . okay, yeah.  I can see that.”  He sighed.  “But . . .”

“Did you break up with her, or did she break up with you?”

“She dumped me.  Why?”

“What exactly happened, Josh?  What were her reasons when she broke up with you?  Start with the little stuff and work your way up.”

“Well, she was upset about something with her name . . . something about how I have a nickname for you, but not her.”

“She wanted the pet names thing.”

“I guess.  Is that an issue?”

“To her, yes.  What next?”

“Apparently it’s a crime for me to have pictures of the two of us around.”

“Pictures of you and her?”

“No . . . of me and you.”

“Do you have any pictures of you and her?”

“Nope.  She’d never mentioned it and I never thought of it.”

“Hey, you’re a guy, so she shouldn’t really fault you for that . . .”

“Then why did she?”

“Because you made the effort to have pictures of me, but didn’t really care when it came to having any of her.”  She shook her head and closed her eyes.  “You put her lower on your list of priorities whether you realized it or not.”

“I . . . I never thought of it that way.”  He sighed.  “I just figured that I had her right in front of me, but you weren’t here . . . so I needed more reminders of you than of her.”

“And that would be another strike against you.  Girlfriends don’t want their guys to have reminders of other girls.  If she’s not family, you shouldn’t be thinking about her.”

“You’re almost family . . .”

“No, I’m not.  No blood relation, no dice.”

“Okay, I’ll buy that.”

“Anything else?”

“She had issues with my calling you, hanging out with you while I’m at home . . .”

“It should be obvious why those are problem areas.  Josh, you can’t expect to convince one girl that you care for her and only for her if you’re spending time on the phone and going out to movies with another.  Even though I’m just a friend . . . that doesn’t fly.”

“You’re more than just a friend.  You’re my best friend.”

“But you have to consider that most guys have another guy as their best friend.  There’s nothing there for a girlfriend to feel insecure about, because the testosterone pretty much overrides everything.”

There was a brief pause before his incredulous voice came through.  “You’re joking, right?”

“I’m dead serious.  With your guy buddies, you talk sports, tell nasty jokes, do handshakes . . . whatever.  It doesn’t get overly personal.”  She twisted a piece of hair around her index finger.  “With you and me . . . it’s deeper than that.  We understand each other.  How would you feel if you were dating a girl whose best friend was a guy who, more than likely, knew more about her than you could ever hope to?”

“That’s not a great example, Jen.”  He laughed softly.  “Because I know how it feels to have a friendship like that.  You know more about me than anyone else and you still take me as is.  I know without a doubt that if I need you, you’ll be there in a snap.  There’s nobody else who can read me the way you do, because you know exactly what to look for.”  Silence carried over the line as he sorted through his thoughts.  “I’ve had plenty of guy friends over the years and not one of them could come anywhere close to doing that.  In all honesty, I think everybody should have a chance to have a relationship like ours, just so they can see what it’s all about.”

“But not everyone has had that kind of friendship.  They don’t know what it’s like to have another person out there who knows every little thing about you, and can read you like a book.”  The hair unwound from her finger, the strands taking on a gently curled look.  “We know each other backwards and forwards.  But that kind of relationship . . . that’s what you’re supposed to want from someone you’re dating, right?” 

“Well . . . when you put it that way, I guess so.”  His tone was unsure.  “But Jen . . . I don’t . . .”

“It’s simple, really.  If you meet someone who you think could be, you know, the one . . . just let me know and we’ll handle it.”

“Now hang on a second.”  Suddenly his voice was sharp, alert.  “It sounds like you’re telling me that you’d . . . you wouldn’t back out on me just because I got into a serious relationship, would you?”

“Not for just a serious relationship, no.  But . . . we’re growing up, Josh.  Someday you’re going to find a woman and fall head over heels in love with her . . . and she’s not going to appreciate how close we are.”  She swallowed hard.  “One day, you’ll have to leave this – us – behind so that you can have a future with her.  We may as well prepare ourselves for it now so that we don’t end up seriously hurt when that time comes.”

“Don’t you think you’re jumping the gun just a little bit here?  I mean . . . I’ve tried dating a few girls and it hasn’t worked out.  So what?”

“I just . . .”

“We’re sixteen.  I highly doubt that either of us will be looking to get married in the next few years.”

“You’re right, but I still think . . .”

“Let’s forget about that whole mess for right now.  It’s a can of worms that shouldn’t even be picked up yet.”  He sighed.  “I think what I’m trying to say here is that I don’t want to date anyone who can’t accept that you – a girl – are my best friend.”

“Even if you’re up front about it, it’s going to be hard for you to find anyone that’ll take you seriously, Josh.”

“Then I won’t date.”  He paused as she laughed.  “I’m serious here.  I want to be able to go grab a bite with you every now and then, to go out and do things together.  I like being around you, doing things with you, and I’m not going to stop just because Potential Girlfriend Number Seven thinks I’m too close to you.”

“And what if she’s right?  What if we are too close?”

“I don’t think we are.”  He fell silent for a few seconds.  “I’m not going to trade you in, Jenny.  I couldn’t.”

“You couldn’t get rid of me that easily and you know it.”  She laughed.  “All I want to do is let you know that if you ever meet that girl . . . the one you think could be your meant to be . . . then you just need to let me know and I’ll back away or whatever and it’ll be fine.”

“Uh huh.”  His disbelieving tone spoke volumes.  “Yeah, I can just see that.”

“Okay, so maybe it won’t be fine . . . but I’ll deal.  Really.”

“Right.  Whatever you say.”  A mental image of him shaking his head at her crossed her mind.  “Why is it that I’m the only one with this problem?  You’ve never said anything about it.”

“Probably because I haven’t found anybody worth the effort.”  She sighed.  “Nobody local, anyway.”

“You know, Tony asks about you quite a bit.  I keep telling him he should call you.”

“He did.  A few months back.  He still does, every now and again.”

“And?”

“At first it was a little weird.  A thousand miles makes a big difference, you know.”

“Yeah, I know.”  He sighed and she could picture him running his fingers through his hair.  “Do you think it’ll work out for you?”

“No.  Tony’s a good friend, but there’s nothing else to build on.”  A grin formed on her lips.  “Besides, long distance relationships aren’t exactly my thing.”

“Okay.  But don’t count it out . . . and you never know when somebody new will come around.”

“I know.”

“And remember that I have to approve.”

“Yeah, right.”  The laugh that followed was loaded with sarcasm.  “Like you let me approve who you date.”

“Hey, I got rid of Alex, didn’t I?”

“That was because she called and threatened me with bodily injury if I ever spoke to you again.”

“She was kind of . . . odd, wasn’t she?”

“Odd?”  Her voice was incredulous.  “Try nutso.  A few fries short of a Happy Meal.  Forget the light being on, there wasn’t even a switch installed.  Living proof that God has a serious sense of humor.”

“Okay, okay.  She was a whack job.” 

“She wanted me to send her a pair of your underwear.  Like I’d have them.”

“No way.”

“Yes way.”

“Do I want to know what you did?”

“Probably not, but I’ll tell you anyway.”  She bit her lip, trying not to laugh.  “I took a pair of Tyler’s old Muppet Babies underwear and mailed them with a note telling her to enjoy.”

“Please tell me you’re joking.”

“Nope.  I’m totally serious.”  Her laugh carried over the line.  “She probably has them framed or mounted somewhere.  I wish I could’ve seen her face when she opened that bubble mailer.  Talk about priceless.”

“Oh, God.”  He groaned, then laughed right along with her.  “Boof . . . you’re horrible.”

“Yeah, I know.  You have to love me, though.”

“I guess.  It’s what makes you who you are.”  His grin showed in his voice.  “You’re a handful and you know it.”

“Yep.  I sure am.”

There was silence for a few moments, then he laughed again.  “What if God really does have a sense of humor and we end up together?  That’d be freakin’ hilarious.”

She blinked, thinking over his words, then arched an eyebrow at the ceiling.  “Hey . . . it wouldn’t be all that bad, would it?”

He fell silent . . . and stayed quiet for several seconds, causing her mind to run wild with all sorts of things that he could be thinking.

God, I’m not totally horrible, am I?  If he’s having to think this hard about it . . . 

“No . . . no, I don’t think that’d be too bad at all.”

She let out a quiet sigh of relief.  “Really?”

“Yeah . . . you’re an awesome girl, Jen.  Whoever catches you is going to be extremely lucky.”

“Good answer.”

“Did I score any points with that one?”

Her grin reappeared.  “Yeah . . . I’ll give you a few points for that.”

--------------------------------------------------

November, 1993

The car stopped in the driveway and her eyes widened when she saw the bodies flying across the front yard, each desperate to get their hands on the ball sailing through the air.

“They started the game early this year.”  Lisa laughed from the driver’s seat as the wrestling match on the lawn grew by the second.

“Yeah, they did.”  Jen watched the melee for a few minutes before turning large eyes to her mother.  “Maybe this means they won’t ask me to . . .”

“Hey!  Jen’s here!”  Tyler had pulled himself from the tangle of limbs and was pointing toward the car.  “Now we can have even teams!”

“. . . play.”  She finished with a groan, sinking down into her seat.

“You don’t want to play?”  The older woman waved back at the boy on the lawn, her surprise evident in her voice.  “The football game has always been your favorite part of Thanksgiving.”

“Yeah, I guess it is.”  A sigh escaped.  “I just get tired of them acting like I’m going to break.”

“Well, honey . . . you’re a girl.  The Chasez boys know better than to hit a fragile female with a full-out tackle.  Karen and the rest of their mothers would be out for blood.”  She grinned as Karen waved from the side yard, camera dangling around her neck.  “See?  She’s even standing guard.”  A short laugh echoed in the small space.  “Not to mention that Joshua would kill anybody who put a scratch on you.”

“But that’s the whole point of football.  To take out the guy who’s trying to get the ball around you.”  Brown eyes rolled in frustration.  “They don’t even let me touch the ground.  What kind of tackle is it if you’re just gonna maneuver it so that you cushion the fall for your target?”

“Like I said . . .”

“I know, I know.  The Chasez boys know better.”  She ran her fingers through her hair, sighing again.  “But I won’t break, so there’s really no reason to worry all that much about it.  I’ve got more fight in me than half those guys out there have in their little finger.”

“And they know it.  But consider this . . .”  Lisa turned to face her, a serious look on her features.  “Those boys out there know you.  They’ve known you since you were little.  And they’ve always treated you like a sister, whether it’s a younger one or an older one.  Did you ever think that maybe they’re easy on you because you’re important to them?”

“I . . .”  The idea struck her speechless.  “No.  I hadn’t thought of it that way.  I mean, I knew Josh cared, but . . .”

“Josh is one of their own.  You’re important to him, so you’re important to them.  Either by association, or personally.  You know them all pretty well, don’t you?”

“Well, yeah.  We’ve been spending Thanksgiving with them ever since . . .”  Ever since Dad died.  She almost let the words slip, but caught them just in time, knowing that the holidays would always be the time when they missed him most.  Clearing her throat quietly, she redirected her statement.  “For what?  Four years?  Something like that.  We’ve always gotten together for Josh, Heather and Tyler’s birthdays.  And they come out for summers and stuff.”

“Right.  So you know them . . . and they know you.”

“Okay.  So what?”

“Honey . . . those boys range from Jake at nine all the way up to Steven at twenty-two.”

“Uh huh.”  Jen was becoming aware of the odd looks they were getting from the guys on the front lawn and she grinned through the window, waving quickly, generating a wave of ‘come on’ gestures.  “And your point is?”

“Sometimes, I seriously doubt that you’re my daughter.”  She shook her head in exasperation.  “Jen, you’re smart.  Figure it out.”  At the girl’s puzzled look, she groaned.  “You really don’t get it, do you?”

“Well, apparently not.”  Slender shoulders shrugged.  “What’s there to get?”

“Open your eyes sweetheart.  You’re seventeen.  You’re attractive.  You’re smart.  You’re comfortable with them.  They know that you’re all bark and no bite, unless it’s over something you care about.  Plus, you’re fun to have around.”  She gestured to the group of guys horsing around on the grass.  “There’s nine of them . . . and chances are, at least five are more interested in something other than football when you’re out there.”

“Five of them?”  A surprised laugh escaped.  “Are you out of your mind?  No way.”

“Pay close enough attention and you’ll notice it.  I’ll bet it’s not so much that they want to win, but that they’re trying to impress you and keep you from getting hurt at the same time.  What girl wouldn’t want a guy who’d put her well-being before his own . . . and in a football game, of all things?”

“Hey Jen!  Come on!”

The yell broke through their conversation.  “You’d better get out there before they rush the car.  And don’t complain that they’re gentle with you.  It just shows they care.”

Jen was still shaking her head as she opened the door and stepped out, quickly pulling her hair back into a ponytail.  “You’re crazy, Mom.”

“Sure I am, but at least I know what I’m talking about.”  She laughed, heading over to where Karen was standing.  “Just remember what I said, Jen.”  Lisa turned and walked away, smiling when she could still hear her daughter’s grumbling behind her.  She reached the side of the house and leaned against the brick beside Karen, her smile becoming knowing when she turned around to see Jen being slung over nineteen-year-old Aaron’s shoulder, a broad grin lighting his features as she screamed in surprise.

Yep.  There’s number one. 

He walked across the yard, two more boys following closely behind him, tugging at her hair, trying to tickle her and smiling as she laughed.

Two and three. 

Tyler began racing after the group and smiling eyes moved over to the other team, finding eighteen-year-old Ben watching after them intently.

Four. 

Then her gaze moved further to the left, landing on a smiling JC, whose eyes were locked on Jen as his cousin carried her over to be on the other team.

And there would be number five.  Whether he knows it or not. 

*************************

“Maybe we should change your position.”

Her head jerked up, meeting Aaron’s eyes across the huddle as she tried to catch her breath.  “You think?”

“Yeah.  He knows every move you’re getting ready to make.”

“It’s that psycho connection, isn’t it?”  Tyler grinned next to her, nudging her shoulder with his.

“That’s psychic connection, Ty.  Not psycho.”  On her other side, fourteen-year-old Mike snickered, shaking his head.

“Actually, I think he had it right the first time.”  She laughed, draping her arms over the shoulders of the guys on either side of her.  “We probably hit the point of psycho a long time ago.”  Taking a deep breath, her attention turned back to Aaron.  “Anyway, it won’t do any good to change my position.  If I change, he’ll change and you know it.”

“So what do we do?”

“Well . . .”  Her voice trailed off, her eyes darting over to the other huddle, only to find JC looking in their direction.  “He’s trying to figure out what we’re doing.”  She moved her arms, looking down as she talked quietly, trying to throw him off.  “How about we try faking it?”

“Faking it?”  Sixteen-year-old Shane furrowed his brow, giving her a quizzical look.

“Yeah.”  Her hands worked at the sleeves of the shirt she’d tied around her waist, the green and blue checkered fabric finally coming loose.  “He knows that I like to fake left when I’m the receiver, so he’ll automatically want to go to my right.  If I keep going left, it’ll knock him off balance and he’ll have to recover.”  She shrugged into the shirt, pulling it over her loose fitting tee shirt, glad for the warmth it provided in the cool breeze.  “Get me the ball and we score.”

Aaron arched an eyebrow at her.  “You sure you can do that?”

“It’s worth a shot, isn’t it?”  When they just stared back at her, not saying anything, she sighed, rolling the sleeves of her overshirt up to her elbows.  “Come on.  I’m pretty fast for a girl.  I could beat any of you in a fifty yard dash any day.”  Her gaze moved around the huddle.  “Let’s do it.” 

“I don’t know . . .”  Heads began shaking around the circle.

“Hey.  This isn’t cool, guys.”  Her eyes narrowed on each of them.  “If we’re gonna play, then let’s play.  I won’t break.  I promise.”  She grinned.  “Besides, look who’s covering me.  If I get hurt, he can’t blame anybody but himself.”  Her hand reached out into the center of the group.  “All right?”

“Yeah.”  Tyler immediately reached in, putting his hand over hers.  He looked up, taking in the amazed looks of his team mates.  “What?  She’s right.  Josh won’t hurt her.”   

“Good point.”  Mike nodded, adding his hand to the mix.  “I say we do it.”

Shane covered the pile of hands with his own.  “Yeah.  I’m in.” 

All heads turned to Aaron, who placed his hand on the top, still appearing wary.  “All right.  Just . . .”  His eyes moved over her, not even bothering to try hiding his concern.  “Just be careful, okay?”

She grinned, nodding quickly.  “I will be.”

The huddle broke apart and they lined back up, facing the other team.

“Took you long enough.”

She looked up, smiling at the teasing look in JC’s eyes.  “Well, you know . . . talking strategy and all.”

“Uh huh.”

They crouched down, waiting for Aaron’s signal that the ball was in play, and she made sure to position herself as she would if she were running her regular receiver’s route, fighting back a smile when JC shifted slightly to his left, anticipating her usual pattern.

“Hike!”

She shot forward, focused on positioning herself to receive the ball, not even batting an eyelash as she whipped herself around and to the left, taking the opposite direction of what she usually ran.  Out of the corner of her eye, she could see JC trying to correct his mistaken block, tripping over his own feet and costing himself several precious steps.

Her upper body turned and she looked toward the sky, immediately finding the football as it sailed overhead.  Reaching up, she snatched it in mid-stride, bringing it down to cradle the leather protectively against her body as she barreled on, all too aware of the pounding feet scrambling after her.

Just as she was crossing between the trees that served as the entrance to their end zone, two arms wrapped around her waist and tugged, sending her careening off balance.  Since she’d already scored the desired points, she released the ball, letting it bounce harmlessly to the grass as the momentum of the grab brought them tumbling over and to the side.

JC tried to halt the movement, twisting around so that she’d land on top of him as he always did, but rather than just hit the ground, they rolled down the slope of the side yard, coming to a stop inside the huge pile of leaves his father had raked the day before.

“Oof!”  The air rushed from her lungs when he landed on top of her, his head pressing squarely on her chest, his body crushing her into the ground as the leaves settled back down over them, burying them underneath a thick colorful blanket. 

For a moment, it was just leaves around him, crunching under his knees as he realized that she was pinned underneath him, her chest rising and falling with heavy breaths, her heartbeat thundering beneath his ear. 

He didn’t even consider the softness pillowing his cheek, just laid there for a second to regain his bearings.

She tried to sit up but couldn’t and settled for raising her head, her shoulders barely leaving the ground when she felt his hair on her chin.  “God, that hurt.”

The words came from just above his ear and he could feel her jaw moving against the top of his head before she let herself fall back to lay flat on the ground, her voice vibrating in her chest below his cheek.  His eyes widened as it sank in exactly where his head was laying . . . and when he realized what he was using as a pillow, he stiffened, raising his head immediately.

“Hey . . .”

Her voice was soft as she shifted a little, rising up just enough that she was pressing against him.  With his sense of sight being limited by the darkness of their cover, his sense of touch was amplified, suddenly making him fully aware of every inch of her that was between him and the ground.  His eyes closed, his teenage male mind instantly bringing up an image of her in her usual loose clothing, mentally tightening the material until it resembled the curves he could now feel.  Long legs, rounded hips, flat stomach . . .

Whoa. 

He forced his eyes open, focusing on one small beam of light that pierced the darkness, illuminating her lips.  They were slightly upturned, as if she was trying not to smile, and full . . . and just a few inches away from him.

“Josh?”

His eyes stayed glued to her lips, studying the way they moved as she said his name, and he suddenly found himself considering how short of a distance those few inches really were.  All he had to do was move forward a little bit . . . let his head fall just a little and . . .

What if I kissed her? 

The thought was unexpected, shocking . . . and surprisingly appealing.  For just a second, he let his imagination run wild, scenarios of what it would be like, how it would feel flying through his mind.  He knew her lips would be soft . . . they’d always looked soft, had felt soft against his cheek, so he could just imagine how they’d actually feel against his own . . .

Are you crazy?  This is Jen, man.  Boof.  Your best friend.  You can’t kiss her!  What are you thinking? 

Out of nowhere, a little voice began screaming in the back of his brain, warning him of the consequences if he went through with what his instincts were telling him to do.

Yeah, it’s Jen.  And I want to kiss her.  What’s wrong with that? 

He blinked, disturbed by the internal argument, his attention still focused on her lips despite the conflict.

You want to kiss her?  When did that happen? 

I . . . I don’t know.  Maybe I’ve always wanted to kiss her.

That thought shook him a little, and he was slightly relieved when the negative voice fired right back.

No, you haven’t always wanted it.  There’s no way. 

But then those pesky instincts kept right on badgering. 

But . . . but I want to! 

No.  You can’t kiss her.  What’s she going to think if you kiss her right now?  Think, man! 

But . . . 

What’ll she do to you if you make a move on her right now? 

There was an internal sigh.

Knowing Boof . . . 

He groaned softly, his eyelids sliding closed as he gave up the fight with a whisper.  “She’d punch my lights out.”

“What?”  Her voice was worried and she lifted her hands, bringing them up to his shoulders so that she could give him a gentle shake.  “Josh?  Are you okay?”

His eyes popped open once again as she spoke, the sound penetrating through and bringing him back to his senses.  “Uh . . . y-yeah.”  He cleared his throat, forcing the unusual thoughts out of his mind.  “Yeah, I’m okay.  You?”

“I’m good.”  Her voice was laced with first relief, then laughter.  “Well?”

He blinked at her expectant tone.  “What?”

“This is cozy and all, but I’m kind of pinned here.”

“Uh huh.”  Even as the sound was leaving his mouth, his body refused to react, perfectly content in its present position.

“Josh.  I can’t breathe with you crushing me.”

“Oh . . . sorry.”  Cringing at the reluctance he could hear in his own voice, his hands moved through the leaves, searching for the ground so that he could push himself up.  Instead, his fingers brushed bare skin, her shirts having ridden up on their journey down the hill.  He froze, his fingertips not moving from her stomach, even more images leaping through his imagination.

“Yeah, that would be me.”  She took a deep breath and the smooth flesh moved beneath his touch, making her laugh.  “Okay, that tickles.” 

He remained quiet, hearing her but not comprehending a thing she said, completely focused on this new discovery.  Absently, his thumbs brushed back and forth over the baby soft skin just above the waistband of her jeans as his eyes trained on her lips once more.

Come on, man.  Just go for it. 

Don’t.  You’re not ready to go there, and neither is she. 

“Josh.”

“Hmmm?”  His voice was distracted as it carried through the darkness.

“Did you hit your head or something?”  Her fingers snapped next to his ear.  “Josh.”

He shook his head quickly, finally coming back to reality.  “What?”

“Are you sure you’re okay?”

“Yeah.  I’m fine.”

“Okayyy . . .”  She trailed off uncertainly.  “Well?”

There was that expectant tone again.  “What?”

“Are we going to get out of these leaves, or are you going to cop a feel while we’re under here?”  The grin rang clearly in her voice, her joking tone lowering to a dramatic whisper as she tightened her fingers on his shoulders, squeezing him through his sweatshirt.  “I won’t tell if you won’t.”  She laughed immediately after, making it obvious that she was nowhere near serious, but that didn’t soften the impact of her words.

And once again, he found himself considering something he’d never thought possible.

Go ahead.  Do it.  The worst she can do is hit you.  Or laugh at you.  Nobody’s going to see, anyway, so you can always . . . 

The voice faded away gradually, cheering him on as it went, and his fingers flexed against her instinctively.  Taking a deep breath, his eyes focused on her lips through the darkness and he felt himself moving down, down, down, until he was only a few inches away.  The sound of her breathing was so close, he could almost feel each exhalation against his lips.  He swallowed hard, closed his eyes and . . .

“He’d better not cop a feel under there.  Do you hear me, young man?”  Karen’s voice rang out loudly from somewhere close by their leafy prison, followed almost immediately by an explosive round of laughter from the direction of the front yard.

His head dropped onto her shoulder, completely missing the target he’d been aiming for just seconds before.  “Yeah, Mom.  I hear you.”  He groaned, feeling the blush spread up his neck, over his cheeks and all the way to the tips of his ears before speaking in a mortified whisper.  “She just had to yell it, didn’t she?”

“Oh, you know you want the guys out there to think that you might’ve gotten at least a little bit lucky.”  She was laughing full out now, her hands pushing gently against his shoulders.  “Come on, stud.  Let me up.”

The humor of the situation set in, and he began laughing along with her, letting his embarrassment melt away, taking the blush right along with it.  He kissed her on the cheek and let his hands release her to finally find the ground, then backed out of the leaves to sit beside the pile, reaching out to grab her legs and pull her out after him.

As he dragged her, she could feel her shirts moving up even further, her fingers immediately grabbing the hem of her tee shirt and yanking it down before her stomach was exposed to the entire Chasez clan.  The sun shone brightly and she blinked for a minute, her eyes adjusting to the light.

Karen was standing a few feet away with her camera, taking shot after shot, but neither of them paid her any attention, still laughing as they tried to dust off their clothing. 

Jen sat up with a grin, laughing even harder as she reached up to brush the leaves from his hair.  “You’re a mess.”

“Look who’s talking.”  A dark eyebrow arched as he raised his hand, pulling a twig from behind her ear.  “You look like you went three rounds with a leaf blower and lost.”

Her hair had come out of its ponytail and was hanging around her shoulders, leaves sticking out all over the place and making her neck itch.  His fingers combed through the dark strands, raking out the bits of leaves and twigs that were tangled there.  While he was working, his eyes focused on the shirt she was wearing and he couldn’t help but smile.  “I can’t believe you still wear that shirt.”

“Of course I still wear it.  It reminds me of you.”  She shrugged as her own smile appeared.  “Like you said . . . it’s like having a hug from you all the time.” 

“That’s only supposed to apply when I’m gone, Boof.  If you want a hug, all you have to do is ask.”  Without hesitation, he hauled her over and into his arms, hugging her soundly and trying to ignore the feel of the soft curves that he’d never paid attention to before.

When he pulled away, he felt her fingers brushing a smudge of dirt away from his cheek and he saw that she was grinning brightly . . . with a thin strip of red liquid trailing down the left side of her face.  His brow furrowed.  “Oh, man . . . I’m sorry.”

Her expression became confused.  “For what?”

His thumb brushed over the area next to her eye, uncovering the small scrape on her forehead before turning his hand to show her the blood.  “Are you sure you’re okay?”

“Yeah, I’m fine.”  She touched the spot gently.  “It’s just a scratch.  Nothing to worry about.”

“Maybe we should go inside and get you fixed up.”

“Josh.  It’s fine.”

His eyes moved over her from head to toe, checking her over to see if she was hiding anything else.  “I just . . .”

“Hey.”  Her hand came up to squeeze his shoulder.  “You can’t protect me from everything, you know.”   

He looked over her face again, taking in her small grin before letting his eyes rest on the scratch marring her otherwise smooth forehead.  She was smiling, in one piece, clearly not seriously hurt . . . but despite all that, he felt a pang of guilt for having allowed such a little thing to happen.

And you wanted to kiss her.  You think a little scratch is bad?  How badly would that have hurt her?  You idiot. 

Blinking against the voice in his mind, he shook his head slightly before returning her smile.  “Maybe not . . . but you can’t keep me from trying.”

“Okay, so you have a point.”  Her eyes narrowed.  “But don’t stress over it too much, okay?  I’m a big girl now and I can take care of myself.”  She smiled at him, then pushed against his shoulders until she was on her feet, holding a hand out to help him up.  “How about we go finish up the game?  I do believe my team was winning.”

He reached out and grasped her hand, pulling himself up with a grin.  “Yeah, you were winning.  But that’s probably gonna change, you know.”

“We’ll just see about that.  Come on.”  She took off running back to the front yard and toward her waiting team, leaving him behind to watch her.

His eyes moved of their own volition, traveling over her once, then twice, starting at the top of her dark hair and moving down her back, over her rear end and on down her legs as she moved toward the group of waiting boys.  Her shirts and jeans fit loosely, not hugging her at all, but if she would wear clothes that weren’t one or two sizes too big . . .

You don’t want to go there. 

Slowly, he started making his way up the hill and toward his own team, never taking his eyes away from her.

He watched as Aaron leaned closer to her, bringing his hand up to brush his fingers over the scratched area next to her eye.  The touch lingered a little too long to be simply concern and when she shook her head with a laugh and leaned into a tight hug, he felt a pang of . . . something shoot through his chest.

“Hey, Josh . . . come on, man.”

Jake’s voice caught his attention and he tore his eyes away from her and over to the group of guys to his left, intercepting the odd look that Steven was giving him.  “Sorry guys.”  He moved over to join the huddle.  “What’s the plan?”

Steven’s shoulder bumped against his.  “Hey, are you okay?”

“Yeah.  I’m fine.  Why?”

“You keep watching . . .”  Steven’s voice trailed off as realization set in, an evil grin spreading across his features.  “What exactly happened under those leaves, Josh?”

“Nothing.”  He shook his head quickly in denial.  “Absolutely nothing happened.”

“Uh huh.  The look on your face doesn’t say ‘nothing’.  It’s screaming ‘something’ loud and clear.”

“Well . . .”  His eyes shot back over to the other huddle, focusing immediately on the way Shane and Mike’s arms were draped around her shoulders.  That strange pang shot through him again.

“Seriously, man.  If I didn’t know any better . . . I’d say you were jealous of our cousins over there.”  Steven studied him for a moment.  “You are jealous.  Because they’re getting up close and personal with Jen.”

“Steve . . .”

“Hey, I’m just stating the obvious.”  His grin grew.  “You landed on top of her, didn’t you?”

“Steve!”  Blue eyes widened warningly.

“I can’t think of anything else that could’ve happened under there.  You finally figured out that she’s growing up in more ways than one.  You were on top, weren’t you?”

“Yeah, I landed on her.”  JC groaned quietly.  “God, Steve . . . I thought I finished puberty a few years ago.”

“Oh, it’s not that, kid.  Trust me.”  Steven laughed loudly.  “You just got torn violently out of the world of ‘Jen’s my best friend’ and thrown into the world of ‘Dang, Jen’s hot’.  And she is hot, Josh.  She’s a total fox.  I’m surprised it took you this long to figure it out.”

“Hrmm.”  He stared at the ground, at a total loss for what to say, and a grunt was all he could respond with.

“Aaron’s after her, you know.”  When JC’s eyes jerked up to meet his, Steven nodded.  “He has been for a while.  I think he knows that he’s not really the one for her, but he doesn’t care.”

“How do you know he isn’t?  Aaron’s a great guy and he’d be good to her.”

“Yeah, I know he’d treat her right.  But he isn’t . . .”  Steven’s voice trailed off and he studied JC carefully.

“He isn’t . . . what?”

“How can you not see it?”

“See what?”

“Man, do you really not see how perfect for each other you two are?”

JC’s eyes widened in surprise.  “What?”

“You and Jen.  I . . . I don’t even know how to explain it.  You guys just fit.  It’s like . . . well, she’s Boof.”

“Don’t call her that.”  The blue-eyed stare sharpened immediately.

“See?  I’m not even interested in her and you’re getting all edgy.”  A grin quickly followed the words.  “That’s not quite the reaction you should give when you’re trying to convince someone that she’s just your friend.”

“She’s more than that to me and you know it.  Jen is . . . she’s like my sister.”

“Yeah, right.”  Steven snorted.  “If I ever saw you look at Heather the way you were just looking at Jen . . . well, that’d be extremely freaky, Josh.”

“Oh shut up.”  JC reached up and punched his cousin’s shoulder.  “You know what I meant.”

“It’s obvious that you two love each other.”

“We’re best friends, Steve.  Of course we love each other.  But it’s a family kind of love.  That’s all.”

A dark eyebrow rose sharply, green eyes taking on an unreadable expression.  “You sure about that?”

No. 

He ignored the tiny, nagging voice and met Steven’s gaze confidently.  “Positive.”

“Okay, then.  How about we bet on it?”

“Are you serious?”

“Yeah.  If you’re so sure . . . then you don’t have anything to lose.”

JC’s eyes narrowed suspiciously.  “What kind of bet?”

“I’ll bet you five hundred bucks that you guys end up together by the time you turn . . . let’s say twenty-two.  That’ll be . . . what?  Thanksgiving of ninety-eight?  That gives you five years to pull those blinders off and see what you have right in front of you.”

“Do you even have five hundred dollars?”

“I’ve got five years to get it together . . . but I seriously doubt I’ll need it.”

JC looked back over to the other team, his eyes focusing on her once again.  He considered the chances, the possibilities and the random thoughts he’d had during those few minutes under the leaves.  Mentally, he stacked those up, measuring them against the odds . . .

There’s no way.  It’s not possible.   

With a confident grin, he turned back to his cousin.  “You’ve got a bet.  Will you even remember this in five years?”

Steven reached out and shook his hand.  “We’ll get it in writing after dinner.”  He watched as JC nodded, then turned back to the huddle, immediately joining the strategy talk.  Green eyes moved from his own team to the other, watching as she hugged Ty, her laughter carrying all the way across the yard.  He shook his head quickly, talking quietly to himself as he moved to join the huddle.  “You’d better start saving up, man.  You have no idea what you’re going to be dealing with in a few years.”

January, 1994

He could hear the phone ringing as he fumbled with the key in the lock on the door, finally getting it open just as the answering machine picked up.

“Hey, you’ve reached me. Either I’m not here, or I don’t feel like talking …”

With a quick lunge, he grabbed up the receiver, cutting off the message before it could send through to record. “Hang on, I’m here.”

“Uh, hey. I didn’t think you’d be there this early.”

“Jen?” His eyes strayed over to the clock, his brow furrowing in confusion. “You’re, like, two hours early.”

“Yeah, I know.” Her voice had an odd tone to it.

“What’s going on? Are you all right?”

“Yeah. I’m fine. I just … I didn’t think you’d be there yet and I’m not going to be here tonight. I didn’t want you to get worried later when I didn’t call.”

“So you were just gonna leave a message?”

“Something like that.” He could hear her taking a deep breath. “I was kind of hoping you’d be there, but I know it’s Friday and it takes forever for you to get off the set before the weekend and I didn’t really think I’d catch you, so a message was the best thing I could think of.”

“Okay.” He smiled at her rambling and settled back into the couch cushions. “You sound nervous.”

“That’s because I am.”

“What’s up?”

“I have …” She trailed off with a quiet groan, obviously trying to find the right words. “God, this is so weird for me. I’m going out tonight.”

“What’s so weird about that? You go out all the time.”

“No, this isn’t like that.”

“Okay.” An image of her twisting her hair nervously leaped into his mind. “Then how is it?”

“Josh … I have a date tonight.”

With those five words, he got the eerie feeling that something inside him had shifted and it didn’t feel good. It didn’t feel right. There was something out of place, but he couldn’t quite put his finger on what it was or what he needed to do to fix it. Then that sick feeling streaked through him, forcing him to close his eyes until the unusual wave had passed.

“Josh?”

“I’m here.” He cleared his throat, trying his best to shake off the odd feelings and focus his attention back on her. “That … that’s awesome, Boof. Who is he? Do I know him?”

“It’s Luke. Dingess.”

“Luke?” His brain raced through memories until he thought he had a match. “Wasn’t he the kid who pushed you down the bleachers in the fifth grade?”

“Yeah. That’s him.”

“And then I punched him and got detention for a week.”

“But his black eye was around for days longer than you were in detention. I still don’t think he’s forgiven you for that.”

“Really?” For a second, confusion wrinkled his brow. “How do you figure?”

“He said something about it. That he’d made sure to wait until you left last week to ask me because he didn’t want you to take another swing at him.”

“Smart guy.”

“Josh …” She sighed at his rough tone.

“What? You can’t say he didn’t deserve it the first time.” His voice became exceedingly defensive. “He pushed you from the top of the bleachers and laughed when you started crying. Somebody’s got to look out for you, Jenny.”

“I think I do well enough on my own. I’m not a little kid anymore.” Muted laughter carried over the line. “It’s just dinner. Maybe a movie or something. I don’t think it’s anything for you to get all worked up about.”

“Has he really changed that much?”

“I think he has. It’s been more than six years, so I’d hope he’s matured since that whole mess went down. He … well, he treats me differently.”

“Oh, I’m sure he does.” Blue eyes narrowed at the ceiling, that burning feeling rising in him no matter how hard he fought against it. “You’re positive he’s changed? He’s actually a good guy?”

“Well, everybody at school seems to think so. He’s captain of the soccer team, senior class president, shoo-in for Prom King. You get the picture.”

“Wow.” He listened to her breathing for a moment, trying to figure out the right way to handle the situation. “Are you excited?”

“I’m more nervous than excited.” She swallowed loudly. “My first date and it had to be with him? Why couldn’t I have started out with the chess club or the debate team and worked my way up?”

“Boof, dating isn’t like a boxing tournament.” The laughter came out before he could stop it. “You don’t start out easy and work your way up through the ranks. You start wherever you get the opportunity.”

“I’m just getting a later start than most.”

“Well, that’s their loss, then. Isn’t it?” He shook his head, knowing that she’d know he was doing it. “Just because nobody’s taken a chance with you until now doesn’t mean anything other than they missed out on something fantastic.”

“Thanks.” She took another deep breath. “So … you approve?”

“You’re the one who’s going out with him. Would it really make a difference what I thought?”

“Well, yeah. It would.”

“It would?” The surprise in his voice was unfiltered, making it obvious that she’d caught him off guard. “Why?”

“I figure that my Dad should be the one to give his approval, but he’s not here to do it. And I trust you more than anyone else on the planet.” There was a brief pause on her end. “I need to hear it, even if you aren’t here with me.”

His teeth worked over his lip as he considered what she was telling him.

“If you don’t like him, I’ll play sick and get out of it.”

“No, you won’t.”

“Yes, I will. You know I will.”

That was the kicker. He was well aware that yes, she would back out of the date if he didn’t think she should go. Everything in him was screaming to do just that, to find fault in Luke so that she wouldn’t go out with him. But he could hear the nervous excitement in her voice, could sense her anticipation for the night ahead, and knew that he couldn’t do that to her. His protective instincts would have to take a backseat this time, along with his lingering dislike for the guy that he could only barely remember.

“If you’re so sure about him …” With a quiet sigh, he pushed down the lump in his throat. “He’d better keep his hands to himself. And if he tries anything, you’d better be the one to let me know.”

“Well, yeah.”

“And be home before midnight.”

“You’re being generous.” He could hear the smile in her voice. “Mom says eleven.”

“That’s even better.” His fingers pinched at the bridge of his nose. “All right.”

“All right?”

“Have fun.”

“You’re sure?”

“Positive. Go out and have fun tonight.”

“Josh, I …” Whatever she was about to say died on the line. “Thank you.”

“Hey, no problem.” He sat up, his eyes locking on the wall in front of him. “When’s he picking you up?”

“At seven.”

“It’s nearly six now. Don’t you think you should start getting ready?”

“It won’t take me that long.”

“Said like a true amateur.” A smile crossed his face at her affronted tone. “Give yourself the extra time, Boof. You’re about to enter the freak zone. Trust me.”

“Uh, okay.” Her voice became unsure. “Can … can I call you tomorrow?”

“Sure. Or tonight after you get in. I’ll be able to sleep easier once I know whether or not I need to fly home and go another round with Dingess.”

“It’ll be fine.” She laughed softly. “But I guess you’re right. I should probably go.”

“Okay. Have fun.”

“I’ll talk to you later, Josh.”

The dial tone sounded in his ear and he just sat there, holding the phone and listening to the monotonous buzzing. The buzz turned into a busy signal, and he finally regained enough of his senses to end the connection. He continued to stare at the handset, that burning feeling rising up in him once again.

“Okay, what’s up with this? She’s going out on a date. So what?” His voice seemed to echo through the empty apartment as he spoke aloud, finally dropping the phone so that he could run both hands through his hair. “It didn’t feel weird when I started dating, so why does it feel weird when she does?”

Because you didn’t have anything to be jealous of when you started dating.

“What? No.” He blinked quickly. “I’m not jealous.”

Yes, you are. Admit it.

“That’s crazy. Why would I be jealous?”

You’ve always been the guy in her life. Now you’ll have to start sharing her.

“That … that’s not a big deal.”

Yes, it is.

“No, it’s not.”

She’s going to have someone else to share her secrets with, to call when she has a problem, to laugh with. She’ll have another shoulder to cry on …

“Okay, that’s enough.” His teeth clamped down on his bottom lip, the burning reaching an all new level. “Stop it.”

The calls every other night will have to stop, you’ll have to share her phone time. No more movie nights, he won’t like that. No more dinners out, her nights will be booked.

“That’s not totally true. She’s still going to be my best friend. We … we have an agreement.”

It’s not going to be the same.

“No, it won’t be the same, but …”

You’ll have to sit back and know that she’s out with someone else instead of hanging out with you. And you’re so jealous you can’t see straight.

“All right. Yes, I’m jealous. Are you happy now?”

Are you?

“I can’t believe I’m sitting here arguing with myself.” A deep sigh escaped. “Yes, I’m jealous that she’s giving Dingess her time. But if that makes her happy, then that’s what she should do. We’ll have to change some things, but it’ll all work out in the end.”

You sure about that?

“Yes. No matter what, we’ll always be friends. If she’s happy, then I’m happy.”

Right. Just keep telling yourself …

He snatched up the remote and flipped on the television, drowning out the voice inside his head. Settling back to watch the mind-numbing evening sitcoms, he relaxed down into a slouch, content to sit and nurse his jealousy until it finally faded with the opening credits of Family Matters.

--------------------------------------------------

April 19, 1994

“I can’t believe it’s already the middle of April.”

“I know, right?” Lisa looked up from where she was peeling potatoes, her eyes shifting over to Jen, who was watching over a pot of pasta. “Time’s flying, isn’t it?” She sighed. “In six weeks, you’ll be a high school graduate.”

“You make it sound like you didn’t know it was coming.” Jen let out a quiet laugh. “I didn’t become a senior overnight, Mom.”

“I know. It seems like it sometimes, though.” The older woman studied her daughter for a moment before turning her attention back to the potato in her hand. “Have they announced the dates for the end of year stuff?”

“Yeah. They gave us a handout with all that last week.” Grasping the pot firmly, she lifted it over to the sink, carefully draining the water from the slithery noodles. “Seems like they want everything later than usual and crammed it all into May. Prom’s on the thirteenth, then they have the senior class picnic on the twenty-first and all the other stuff like chorus and band concerts and honors and sports banquets and all that spread out all over the place.”

“And graduation?”

“The first weekend in June.” She shook the pot, loosening the noodles from the bottom. “The Class Night ceremony and dance are on the third and graduation is on the fourth.”

“Sounds exciting.”

“It will be. I don’t think it’s going to really sink in until they start making the announcements for half days, though.”

“That was always the best part.” Lisa laughed, moving over to rinse the skinless potatoes so that she could start cutting them. “Have you bought your prom dress yet?”

“Yeah, but I’m thinking I won’t be needing it.”

“You won’t?” The surprise in her voice was obvious. “What happened to Luke?”

“We … uh, he kinda dumped me. Last week.”

“Oh, honey. I’m sorry.”

“Hey, it’s no big deal. He fell victim to the cheerleader skirt.”

“What?”

“Macie Wilkins grabbed his attention.”

“Who’s Macie Wilkins?”

“Life-size Barbie doll. Head cheerleader. Most likely to be Prom Queen.”

“Hmmm.” Lisa’s forehead puckered. “And he just dropped you like that?”

“Yep.”

“I thought better than that of Luke.”

“Yeah, well, he’ll get his.” Jen laughed under her breath. “Macie is … let’s just say she’s dumb as a rock. And has a personality to match.”

“Okay, but just because Luke is out of the picture doesn’t mean you shouldn’t plan on going.”

“Nobody’s going to ask me, so why waste the money on a dress I’ll never wear? I was going to take it back tomorrow.”

“Jen, it’s your senior prom. You should go.” Lisa finished with the potatoes and dropped them into the pan, stepping back when the oil coating the bottom began to pop and hiss. “It’s all right to go by yourself, you know.”

“Now, that would show what a winner I am.” She raised her hand and waved it wildly over her head. “‘Look everybody, I came alone to the prom!’” Shaking her head, she opened the cabinet and pulled out a jar of Prego. “Nothing says ‘loser’ better than that.”

“It’s three weeks away, sweetie. Keep the dress. I’m sure one of the guys out there will come to his senses and ask you.”

“I don’t know, Mom. I could always save the money and do something special this summer.”

“Sure, you could do that. But this is your senior year. The last prom you’ll ever have. You’ll regret it if you just give up and don’t go.”

“Well …” Her fingers played with the edge of the bottle’s lid, tapping for a second before twisting it open. “Maybe you’re right.”

“Hang on to the dress. You can always take it back if you decide not to go.”

“Hmm.” Silence fell over the room as she thought it over. “You know what, Mom? I think I will.” Pouring the sauce over the pasta, she looked up with a smile. “What do you think? Should I doctor it a bit, or do you want it as is?”

“By all means, doctor away, honey.” With a laugh, Lisa glanced over as Jen began reaching up into the cabinets for a collection of spices. The girl’s sleeve slid down with her movement, revealing a bruise that seemed to be healing on her right arm. “What happened, baby?” She put her hand on Jen’s shoulder, taking a closer look when she noticed the reddened skin of her forearm. “Did you hurt yourself?”

“Yeah.” Blinking quickly, Jen let out a shaky laugh as she moved away, pulling her sleeve back into place. “I was trying to go around some kids in the hall and cut it too close to the lockers. Knocked myself pretty good.” Shrugging indifferently, she began shaking one of the seasonings over their pasta. “It looks a lot better now than it did last week.”

“Didn’t you say you fell down the stairs last week, too?” Lisa gave her a concerned look. “Your hip was bothering you. Are you sure you’re okay? You aren’t feeling dizzy or anything, are you?”

“I’m fine, Mom.” Swapping containers, she carefully added some spice to the bowl. “I’ve just been in a hurry lately and had a bad week. Clumsiness heals, I promise.”

“Okay.” Her maternal instincts were waving huge red flags, but she knew better than to push. “Just be careful, okay?”

“I will.”

*********************

Two Weeks Later

“Hey, Mom?” Footsteps moved softly overhead, moving toward the stairs. “You down there?”

“In the dining room.” Lisa leaned forward across the table, waiting for the shadow to appear at the foot of the stairs. “What’s up?”

“Could you do me a favor?”

“Sure, hon. What is it?”

“Hang on.” Jen stopped beside her, sifting through the slips of paper in her hand. “Let me find the right one.” Reaching in her pocket, she pulled out another handful of receipts. “If I’ve lost it … oh, here it is.” She held out the slip of paper. “I’m going to get the dress packed back up in its bag, but I’m not going to have a chance to run it by the store. Could you return it for me whenever you get a free minute?”

“Return it?”

“Yeah.” Her brown ponytail bounced as she nodded quickly. “It’s a good thing I’ll be able to get the money back for it. I can’t believe I laid down a hundred and fifty dollars for a dress.”

“Wait. You’re returning your prom dress? Why?”

“Mom, it’s a little over a week until the dance. Everybody who’s going to have a date has one.”

“You don’t have to have a date to go to the prom, Jen. Find a few friends and go together.”

“All my friends have dates. I’d stick out like a sore thumb.”

“Since when do you care about that?” Motherly eyes trailed over her from head to toe, taking in the miserable shifting of her feet. “You know you want to go. Why won’t you?”

“I don’t want to have to go and see him having the time of his life while I’m stuck by myself.” With a deep sigh, Jen sank into the seat across the table. “They throw it in my face every day as it is, and I don’t want it to ruin something as special as this is supposed to be.”

“So you’re just going to duck and run?”

“I guess so.”

“Jen, what happened to the girl who wouldn’t let anybody knock her down?”

“She got knocked a little harder this last time.” She took a shaky breath. “It hurt, Mom. I try to pretend that I’m okay with it and that it doesn’t faze me at all, but it hurt. More than it should have.”

“Sweetie, we all get hurt. It’s part of life. Especially high school life.”

“I know that.”

“Was he really so important to you?”

“No, it wasn’t that he was important. It was just so nice to have somebody that I thought cared for me, you know?” Raising her hands, she covered her face, her elbows resting on the tabletop. “He could’ve picked any of a hundred girls, but he picked me. That made me feel special. And when he finally figured that he’d wasted enough of his time …”

“He wasn’t wasting his time, Jen.”

“Actually, yeah. According to him, he was.”

“What?” Lisa’s eyes widened in surprise. “He had the nerve to come out and say that to you?”

“Yep. He pretty much always had something to say.” Her teeth worked on her bottom lip as she refused to look up. “I’m not tall enough. A size eight isn’t small enough. I’d look better with blonde hair.” She cleared her throat quietly. “And he’ll be surprised if another guy is dumb enough to waste his time on me.”

“This boy … someone needs to have a serious talk with Luke Dingess.”

“No. It’s okay, Mom. He’s …”

“Don’t you dare tell me that you think he’s right.” Her eyes flashed with anger. “You couldn’t possibly …”

“Mom. Stop.” Jen held up a hand. “I know he’s full of crap and just trying to make me feel bad. It hurt at the time, but it’s fine now.” The older woman’s eyebrow arched sharply and she looked down sheepishly. “Okay, so maybe it’s not fine, but I’m working on it.” A grin spread across her face. “That rush I got from knocking him flat in front of the guy’s locker room definitely made up for some of it.”

“Really?” Anger melted away to laughter. “Face or stomach?”

“Umm, both. But I think he felt the one to his face more.” Her fist clinched. “I was sore from that one for a few days myself. Those self-defense classes they had us take didn’t warn us how much it’d hurt when you weren’t wearing the boxing gloves.”

“That’s my girl.”

They laughed together for a little while, before sobering.

“I still don’t think it would be very smart for me to put myself through that, though.” Jen slid the receipt across the table to leave it next to her mother’s hand. “Not by myself. And since nobody else is stepping up to the plate …” Brown eyes became pleading. “Could you please do this for me?”

“You’re sure?”

“I’m positive. Just … please, Mom?”

“Okay.” With a sigh, Lisa picked up the slip of paper and leaned over to tuck it into the side pocket of her purse. “Get it ready and lay it out for me. I’ll take care of it when I can.”

“Thanks.” A small smile graced her features as she stood, then made her way back up the stairs and to her room.

After a few minutes, Lisa stood and followed, moving quietly until she was just outside the bedroom door. Jen was standing in front of her mirror, holding the dress to her front with a sad smile just slightly lifting the corners of her lips. With a quick shake of her head, she turned away, clipping the dress back to its hanger and carefully sliding it into the clear garment bag hanging on the back of the closet door. Once she was sure that the long skirt was clear of the zipper, she zipped it closed and took a step away, biting her lip as a tear went sliding down her cheek.

“Ugh. Don’t be stupid, Jen.” With a frustrated sigh, she wiped the tear away, giving herself a mental shake. “You can’t be attached to a dress. It’s just a bunch of purple fabric. There’ll be plenty others. No matter how perfect it is, you can let this one go.” She looked up when her mother walked in, pasting a quick smile on her face. “I’ve got it ready.”

“Go ahead and take it down to the car. I’ll try to get to it this week, but I can’t guarantee anything.”

“That’s okay. It doesn’t really matter when it gets there, as long as it does. Just don’t lose the receipt and we’re good.” Her voice trailed off as she made her way down the stairs, leaving Lisa standing in her room. “Too bad I can’t take back the shoes. That’d be another fifty bucks.”

Lisa just stood there, her eyes moving carefully over the room until they landed on the photos displayed across the top of the dresser. She studied the smiling pair in each picture, a photographic history of the past decade or more, and an idea began to spring to life. Her conscience – or maybe it was her common sense – immediately kicked in. “No. She’ll handle it all right on her own. I shouldn’t butt in.”

With that, she turned and walked out of the room and back down the stairs, shoving the idea away, ignoring it completely. At least, until two days later, when she was parked in front of the store the dress had come from. She twisted in the driver’s seat, looking over her shoulder at the dress, tucked safely away in its protective bag. Turning back around, her gaze landed on the receipt sticking out of the side pocket of her purse. Then she remembered the sad look on Jen’s face as she’d stood in front of the mirror, modeling the look for herself one last time, and knew she’d never be able to return it.

The key was turned in the ignition, the car was put in gear and, after a quick stop at the bank, she sped home, hoping that she’d have an empty house long enough to get everything done.

Carefully, the dress was hung in her own closet, bag and all, before Lisa returned to Jen’s bedroom, this time to search through the address book that was always on the desk, between her journal and phone. Flipping through a few pages, she quickly found the number she was looking for and grabbed a pen and a piece of paper so that she could jot the digits down, then she shut the book and looked over the desk, making sure that everything was exactly as she’d found it.

Reaching into her pocket, she pulled out the green bills and laid them on the desktop, pausing long enough to write I took the shoes back, too on a slip of paper for her to find with the money. She made her way over to the closet and picked up the box with the new shoes, taking them to her own room and hiding them with the dress.

Then she was sitting at the dining room table, the phone number and the cordless phone lying in front of her. Biting her lip, she contemplated whether or not this was the smartest thing to do.

“He’ll be surprised if another guy is dumb enough to waste his time on me.”

The anger sparked in her once again and she reached out to snatch up the phone. “She’ll have my nosy head on a platter, but heaven help me, she’s going to show that boy just what he’s missing out on.”

Her fingers moved quickly over the numbers and she took a deep breath as she waited for an answer.

One ring. Two rings. Three …

“Hello?”

Please let this be the right thing …

--------------------------------------------------

May 13, 1994

“Mom! What do you mean I have a date for tonight?” Jen’s face turned red in embarrassment. “I don’t need you getting dates for me! Do you have any idea how pathetic that makes me look?”

“Well, honey, I didn’t think you’d take it that badly. I’m sorry I stepped on your toes, but this young man is in town for the weekend and he used to go to your high school. He thought it’d be nice to go, and I figured you wanted to go, so I worked it out.”

“I don’t even know this guy! What if he’s a complete loser?”

“Would I set you up with a loser? Come on, sweetie. Give it a chance. You’ll go to the dance like I know you’ve wanted with a perfectly nice young man and you’ll get to wear that gorgeous dress you bought.”

“The dress?” Brown eyes widened instantly. “I don’t have a dress! You took it back, remember? The shoes, too.”

“It’s hanging upstairs in my closet. The shoes are there, too.”

“You … you didn’t return them?”

“No. After seeing your face, I couldn’t.”

“But that money …” Jen’s brow furrowed and she shook her head. “Two hundred dollars is a lot, Mom.”

“Consider it an early graduation gift.” Lisa smiled, reaching up to push her daughter’s hair out of her face. “Now go hop in the shower. You don’t have a lot of time and your hair will take a while.”

“Mom, I just don’t think …”

“Look, Jen. I know you want to go. You know you want to go. And this way, you can show the Dingess boy that there is a guy out there who’s smart enough to take full advantage of the awesome girl that you are.” She looked pointedly at the clock on the wall. “Now go on and get ready. It’s after four and he’ll be here at six thirty.”

Jen sighed, chewing on her lip as she studied her mother’s face. She’d seen that look before. Persistent. Stubborn.

Yes, she’d definitely seen that look before. Many times. In the mirror.

“Okay. Whatever. But if this is a disaster, it’s all your fault.” She threw her hands in the air as she turned and made her way up the stairs, grumbling quietly. As she walked into her room and closed the door, she weighed the situation in her mind.

She had a date. A blind date, but a date, nonetheless. If it went sour, she could blame her mom. If it went well … well, maybe this could be a life-changing experience.

Knowing that she was stuck, she heaved out a sigh and made her way to the bathroom for a quick shower. By the time she’d come back into her room, everything that she needed was laid out for her: dress, shoes, makeup and all.

A smile spread across her face when her gaze landed on the strapless purple gown. The material had been her main reason for buying it, a heavenly cotton with almost a silky feel that hung all the way down to her feet and swished around her legs when she moved. The bodice fit the curves of her figure perfectly, the cut leaving her collar bone and upper back bare, showing just the right amount of skin to classify as respectable.

She reveled in the feel of the gown as she worked her dark hair into a simple up-style that left her neck bare, but let a few loose strands frame her face. Carefully, she applied a light coat of makeup to her tanned skin, using the smallest amount of color to accent her brown eyes and high cheekbones, her lips tinted with a shimmering gloss.

Time flew away from her and the next thing she knew, the doorbell was ringing downstairs, jarring her from her concentration.

With a quick glance at the clock, she saw that it was already six thirty, meaning that, if nothing else, her date was punctual. Rising quickly from her seat, she spritzed on the tiniest bit of perfume, slipped on the high heels dyed to match the gown and grabbed up the small beaded bag that had come with it.

“Honey, he’s here!”

“Be right down!” One last look in the mirror, a deep breath to calm her nerves, and she was on her way down the stairs. Her heart was beating so loudly, blocking all noise from her ears, she was sure it could be heard all through the house. As she descended the staircase, her eyes darted back and forth across the foyer, suspicion setting in when she saw no one.

Agitated, she pasted a welcoming smile on her face and rounded the corner into the living room, freezing as the flash went off in her eyes. “Good grief, Mom. You don’t have to blind me.” She blinked to clear the spots from her vision, only to see Lisa standing alone in the room. “Okay, what’s going on? Where’s this mystery guy you’ve talked into taking me?”

“He’s right here.”

Whirling around at the familiar voice, her eyes widened in shock when she saw him leaning against the doorjamb. “Josh?”

“Hi.” He smiled, stepping away from the doorway. “Were you expecting someone else?”

“Oh. My. God! You’re here!” She moved the few steps toward him and threw her arms around his neck, hugging him with all her might. “You’re really here!”

“Yeah, I’m here.” His grin widened and he tightened his arms around her, his eyes closing as he held her as closely as he could. “I wouldn’t miss this for anything, Jen.”

For some reason, she couldn’t make herself let him go. She turned to look at her mother, her head resting on his shoulder. “How did you …?” When the flash went off in her face again, she paused, trying to blink away the temporary blindness. “You know what, never mind. I don’t want to know how you pulled it off.” Her head tilted back, allowing her to smile at him again. “I’m just glad you’re here.”

“Okay guys. Let me get a few more pictures, then you can go. You look great together.”

“Wow.” His eyes grew large as they moved over her, taking his first good look. Giving a low whistle, he wrapped his arm around her waist, pulling her to his side for the traditional dance photo. “You look fantastic, Boof. I’m gonna have to beat all the guys off with a stick.”

“Thanks.” She looked up at him, her smile lighting up her eyes. “You don’t look too bad yourself. Maybe I can get a dance or two in before the girls take you away from me.”

“Not a chance.” The last flash dimmed, and they turned to leave, his hand still resting on her hip. “I’m all yours.”

“Have fun, kids!” Lisa leaned out the door as they talked all the way to the car. “Be careful!”

They waved back before he put the car in reverse and backed out of the driveway.

*********************

“I’m gonna go grab some punch.” She stepped away from him as the song ended, smiling as she gestured to the refreshment table. “Do you want any?”

“Sure.” His eyes followed her as she walked across the room, watching as she was stopped by several people for a quick chat, always ending with a bright smile and a laugh. A soft smile was just beginning to lift the corners of his mouth when he felt a crawling sensation on his neck, as though someone were staring at him. With a quick shudder, he turned his head, doing a quick scan of the room until he spotted the pencil-thin blonde who’d been tailing him since she’d arrived, her blue eyes trained pointedly on him.

She gave him a flirtatious smile, not even looking away when a masculine arm went around her waist. When she crooked her finger at him in an obvious summons, he just rolled his eyes, ignoring the slightly shocked look that crossed her face at his dismissal. His gaze moved over to her companion, dark eyebrows arching when he found Luke Dingess standing there, his attention focused on something other than the attractive girl he’d snagged as a date.

Ah. So this must be Macie.

As he made the connection, he unconsciously followed the direction of Luke’s stare, coming to land on Jen, standing a few feet away from the refreshment table, talking to the guy who’d been acting as DJ. Of course, she was oblivious to the attention, continuing on with her conversation as if nothing was out of the ordinary. But when Luke entered his line of sight, moving purposefully toward her, JC knew that things were about to get very un-ordinary. He tensed, taking two steps before a hand grabbed his arm, holding him still.

“Don’t run off now, cutie.” Blonde hair was tossed over her bare shoulder as blue eyes batted innocently up at him. “What’s your name?”

“People who matter call me Josh.” His gaze moved over her quickly, his expression darkening in something akin to disgust. “You can call me JC. Let go of me.” He shook her off and made quick tracks across the room, where Jen was now standing with Luke, her expression incredulous as he spoke to her.

“You can’t be serious.” Her voice was soft, but he heard her loud and clear. And by the narrowing of Luke’s eyes, JC was positive that he’d heard her, too.

But that didn’t keep him from yammering on. “Jen, come on. You know you want me.”

“Seriously? After what you put me through?” She laughed humorlessly, shaking her head. “You must be joking.”

Without a second thought, JC pushed his way next to her, his arm going around her and pulling her to him. “Of course he’s joking.” He smiled at her quickly, leaning down to kiss her cheek before turning to let serious eyes move over the guy in front of him, making no secret to the people watching them that he was sizing up the jock. “But then, I guess he really could be as dumb as he looks.”

A measuring look was passed between the two teens, Luke turning red at the insult and JC fighting not to join in with the laughter around them. He felt Jen’s arm sliding around his waist, her hand flattening against his hip, and when he looked down he was met with a set of worried brown eyes, darting back and forth between the two of them, and he finally realized how dangerous the situation could get.

The DJ turned the volume of the music up slightly, the beat of the song pulsing around the room, bringing more people to the dance floor.

“Come on, Josh.” She stepped back until her hand could grab his and pulled on him gently. “Forget about him and dance with me.”

He didn’t say another word, just let her lead him away and out to join the other dancing couples, his attention torn away from Luke, who was grumbling behind them, to focus solely on her.

They finally came to a stop on the other side of the crowd, where she turned back to him with a shaky smile. “Josh …”

“I know, I know. I’m sorry.” He sighed, relaxing slightly when he felt her arms around his neck. “He just … God, he’s such a jerk.”

“Yeah, he is.” She blinked quickly, taking a deep breath as the panic left her. “But he’s twice your size and wouldn’t have given a second thought about taking you down.”

“No.” His head shook back and forth in denial. “He …”

“He could’ve hurt you.” Her fingers fisted behind his neck and he was surprised to see the wetness forming in her eyes. “Don’t shield me like that, okay? I know what he can do, and I couldn’t handle it if you got hurt for me.”

She took a ragged breath, the trembling of her hands obvious against his skin, and he instinctively hugged his arms around her, pulling her tight against him. “Hey, it’s all right.” His voice was soft, his head bent down so she could hear him over the music. “Nobody got hurt. Everything’s fine.”

“I know.”

“He’s not going to hurt anybody.” He straightened up just enough to be able to see her face. “He can’t hurt you again, Boof. Not unless you let him.”

“Yeah.” Another deep breath, then she nodded, her eyes closed tightly. “I know.”

“Okay.” One of his hands moved to the side of her face, his thumb brushing gently across her cheek. “Then how about you open your eyes and convince me that you mean it?”

Immediately, her eyes opened, meeting his stare dead on. “I know he can’t hurt me again. I’m not stupid enough to give him the chance.” A smirk lifted the corner of her mouth. “Besides, I think he figured out a few weeks ago not to tangle with me.”

“He figured out … oh, no way.” He laughed softly, his arm moving back down until his hand was on her hip. “You punched him?”

“What else was I supposed to do? He’d just gotten finished telling me how lousy a girlfriend I was and … well, I got mad. He wound up falling through the door into the guy’s locker room.”

“Doesn’t that door open outward?”

“Yeah.” She shrugged. “What can I say? He’s a big guy and he was falling pretty hard.” Her face lightened with her grin. “Coach Jacobs saw the whole thing and wanted to give me a place on the boxing team. I had to decline.”

They laughed together for a while, relaxing against each other, forgetting about the negatives from a few minutes earlier and focusing on the positives of being able to be there, dancing through a long string of slow ballads and driving rock songs.

Suddenly, the music stopped, a loud “All right, kids, listen up!” ringing across the P.A. system. A collective groan rose from the crowd as every head turned to the stage in the corner, where the teachers who headed the dance committee had gathered.

“Oh, don’t give me that.” A short woman had stepped up to the microphone, an envelope in her hands. “Mr. Everly would have my head if he didn’t have pictures of the King and Queen for the yearbook, so let’s get this over with and you all can go back to dancing. If you were nominated, come up on the stage.”

He turned when he heard her grumbling, reaching out to grab her hand as she began to walk away. “Hey. Going somewhere?”

“Yeah, I guess I am.” Her lips turned up slightly as she gestured toward the stage with her free hand. “I was nominated, so I should probably get up there.”

“Seriously?”

“My name was on the ballot and everything.” Even if it was just another way for Luke to torture me. She mustered up a grin for the people who were staring at them, then turned, looking pointedly down to where he was still grasping her hand. “Think you can let me go? It shouldn’t take me very long to lose this thing.”

His eyes moved quickly from side to side before landing back on her, his own smile forming as he released her. “Sure thing. Good luck, Boof.”

A laugh carried back to him as she walked away, his smile growing as he saw how many people tapped her shoulder, wishing her luck. She climbed the steps, joining Macie and two other girls on the right side of the stage while Luke and three other guys stood on the left.

There was no surprise when Luke was announced as King and he grinned widely as he leaned down for them to place the crown on his head. He turned and winked at the girls across the stage, earning an exaggerated eye roll from Jen and a knowing smile from Macie, who had already begun inching forward and closer to the center of the stage.

“And your Prom Queen for the class of 1994 is …” The elderly teacher, Ms. Gibbs, paused for emphasis, then read the name. “Jennifer Lawson.”

The crowd erupted into applause, the cheers melting into laughter at the shocked expressions on the girls’ faces as they looked at each other, both having fully expected for Macie to take it by a landslide. The petite redhead standing beside Jen pushed her gently, forcing her to step ahead of Macie and accept the crown.

Embarrassed tears began to form as the plastic crown was arranged on her head, and wide brown eyes moved over the faces, stopping only when they found that familiar blue gaze. When she spotted him in the crowd, grinning proudly and giving her a thumbs-up before applauding and cheering loudly with the rest of the well-dressed teens, she had to swallow back her mortification, forcing what she hoped was a passable smile.

“Come on, Jen. They need to take the picture now.” She was pulled over to the side of the stage, where she found Luke and a photographer waiting. “Just stand right there next to him and ya’ll can do the dance thing.”

“Do we have to do this together?” Luke smiled at her as she came closer, not caring that she looked far from pleased at the idea. “Can’t you just have a picture of him and a picture of me?”

“Sorry, kid.” The photographer shook his head. “One page, one picture. Come on, move on in. He won’t bite.”

“Yeah, right.” Reluctantly, she stepped over beside him and pasted a smile on her face. He shifted, moving his arm behind her, and she turned her head to send him a deadly glare. “Don’t you dare touch me, Luke, or that crown’s going to get shoved in a place it was never meant to be.” Her voice was loud, carrying over the room, and a swell of laughter rose from the crowd as Luke’s ears turned red in embarrassment. His arm fell back to his side and she returned to smiling at the camera, relief spreading through her when the flash went off for the last time.

“Not so fast, honey.” She was moving away, ready to go down the stairs and back into the safety of the crowd when a hand grabbed her arm. “You’ve still got the King and Queen dance.”

“Oh, God, this is a nightmare.” Her shoulders heaved with her groan and she shook her head. “Ms. Gibbs … I can’t dance with him.”

“Sure you can. Come on, kids.” The older woman gestured to Luke, summoning him over as she stepped back up to the microphone. “Now we’ll have the traditional King and Queen dance. Please clear the dance floor.”

Jen felt fingers grasp her wrist and turned to find Luke steering her down the stairs and out onto the empty floor. “It’s gonna be kind of hard for me to not touch you when we’re supposed to dance, isn’t it?” The lights dimmed and the music began, a slow melody carrying over the room, and he opened his arms to her. “Come on, Jen. Dance with your king.”

Her eyes darted around the dark room, searching the shadows intently before she finally smiled at something over his shoulder. “There’s just one problem with that, Luke.”

“Really?” His brows arched in surprise. “What’s that?”

“I didn’t vote for you, which means you aren’t my king.” Grinning up at him, she patted his shoulder and stepped around him. “So I think I’ll have to pass.” A murmur went around the room as she moved quickly across the floor, her features growing brighter with each step until she was able to hold out her hand in invitation. “How about it? Think you can dance with a queen?”

“Sure, but only because it’s you.” JC smiled, allowing her to take his hand and pull him out onto the floor. When her arms went around his neck, he let his own tighten around her waist, pulling her just that little bit closer. “You’re blowing tradition out of the water, you know.”

“Yeah, I know.” She laughed softly, leaning forward until she was resting against his shoulder, her forehead brushing the side of his neck. “But this is our song. I can’t dance to it with anybody but you.”

“We have a song?” His head tilted down, his whisper surprised. “Really?”

“Uh huh.” The crown scratched the sensitive skin beneath his ear as she nodded, her eyes closing. “Just listen. You’ll see why.”

He fell silent and listened to the music, trying to ignore the feel of her fingers on his neck, the chills that kept going down his spine, as they swayed slowly to the beat.

When I see you smile, I can face the world
Oh, you know I can do anything
When I see you smile, I see a ray of light
Oh, I see it shining right through the rain
When I see you smile
Baby, when I see you smile at me

Of their own accord, his arms tightened around her and he didn’t even realize that his head was moving until he felt his cheek resting against her temple, the soft strands of hair framing her face tickling his chin. She sighed, settling herself comfortably against him, and he closed his eyes when her fingers began combing through his hair, breathing deeply as he smiled.

In that moment, something clicked. He felt a peace settle in, happiness surging through him as they continued to dance, oblivious to any and everything around them. His heart skipped a few beats as he kissed the side of her head, a grin forming when he realized that for the very first time, everything felt right.

“Are you serious?” She widened her eyes in amazement before bursting out laughing. “No way.”

“Yes way.” Her laughter was contagious, and he chuckled with a grin. “He thinks you’re his soul mate.”

“Who is this again?”

“Justin.” His foot pushed against the ground, sending the bench seat swinging lazily. “You know, the blonde kid from the gorilla skit.”

“Oh, yeah. The gorilla kid. You’re rooming with him and his mom since your dad came home, right?”

“Right.” He sighed. “They’re awesome and all, but he keeps sneaking into my room and going through my stuff to find new pictures of you. I swear, he’s obsessed.”

“And he’s how old?”

“Thirteen.”

“Oh, God.” The groan that escaped was loud in the darkness of the front yard, followed immediately by a soft chuckle. “The first guy who actually thinks I’m it for him and he’s a thirteen-year-old Mouseketeer. Go figure.” An evil tone came to her voice. “I’ll have to meet him someday. Rock his world a little.”

“I don’t know about that.” He shifted, his arm stretching along the top of the swing as he turned to look at her. “You don’t want to traumatize the kid.”

“So now I’m traumatizing?” She crossed her arms in a mock huff, fighting to keep the smile from her lips. “Thanks a lot.”

“Hey, the truth is hard to swallow.” Another push and the swing went a little faster, keeping up with the playful tone of the conversation. “Rocking his world probably isn’t something you want to try, anyway. Knowing him, he’d like it and come back for more.” He grinned as she laughed, straining to see her face as the moonlight dimmed.

“Thanks for tonight.” Her voice was soft, but he could feel her eyes on him. “I really needed this.”

“No problem. Anytime you need to get revenge on somebody, I’m there. Besides, I couldn’t just let you skip your senior prom.”

“It wouldn’t have been right for me to go with anybody else, I don’t think.”

“Mmhmm.” He bit back a yawn. “For a blind date, I’m not all that bad, am I?”

“Nope.” She smiled over at him. “I thought it was pretty much perfect.” Her eyebrow arched questioningly. “This was a date?”

His heart skipped a beat when he met her gaze and he had to force himself to respond. “Yes, this was a date, but we’re not dating.” He paused, thinking over his phrasing. “Did that even make sense?”

“Yeah.” Her head bobbed in response. “It made sense.”

“All right.” There was an audible sigh and he could feel the swing moving as she relaxed back into the seat. “About tonight … are you sure you’re okay with the whole Dingess thing?”

“I don’t really have any choice but to be okay with it.” She tilted her head back, staring at the stars as she talked. “It was just rough. You know?”

“Did he tell you why?” The words were out before he could stop them and he cringed, not wanting to pry. “Sorry. You don’t have to …”

“Of course he did.” He went silent as she answered, surprised at her interruption. “In great detail.”

She sounded stuffy, as though she were fighting not to cry, and his brow furrowed, his eyes narrowing on her when she cleared her throat and sniffled. “Boof … come here.” Reaching out, he pulled her over until she leaned against him, his arm around her shoulders, and he felt her relax. “Do you want to talk about it?”

“I just …” She paused, absently reaching up to take his hand while she cleared her throat again. “In the beginning, I was happy with him, Josh. At least, I thought I was. But at the same time, I never really believed that it could actually be true, you know? Him wanting to be with me. I couldn’t shake the feeling that something about the whole thing was off. It was ridiculous and weird and amazing and crazy all at the same time.” Her fingers tightened around his. “I think I just wanted so much for somebody to care about me and want me that I talked myself into thinking he would.”

“Jen …”

“I mean, seriously. Could I have been any more wrong?” Without even acknowledging that he’d spoken, she barreled on, needing to get it all out. “I shouldn’t have been surprised how it went down. He cheated on me, I caught him, and it just got messier from there. And he even had the balls to stand there and tell me that it was all my fault we were so wrong for each other.” Her free hand came to rest on his knee, fisting in anger. “I’m not tall enough, or pretty enough, or preppy enough. It’s a sin that I’m not a cheerleader and I spent too much time working on the spring concerts and not enough with him. I need to dye my hair blonde and lose fifteen pounds so that I can squeeze into whatever anorexic size is ‘in’ right now …”

“Okay, I’ve heard enough.” He pulled his hand from hers, tightening his fingers over the back of the swing. “Let me up.”

“What?” She broke out of her tirade when she heard him, her eyes widening when she felt how tense he was. “Why?”

“I’m gonna kill him.”

“Josh, no.” With an effort, she loosened her fist, pressing her hand down on his knee in what she hoped was a calming manner. “It’s over and done with. He’s a jerk, everybody knows it. And I’ll get over it.” A thought popped into her head and she couldn’t keep the smile from reaching her voice. “Besides, he’s with Macie. I think that’s punishment enough, don’t you?”

“She’s not exactly all there, is she?” His voice was still slightly harsh, but he leaned back in the swing and she could feel the tension draining out of him by degrees. “I mean, I didn’t get the vibe that she was running on all cylinders.”

“Forget cylinders, she’s lucky if the hamster stays on the wheel.” She sighed when he finally relaxed enough to laugh. “She’s a human toothpick with blonde hair. That’s about as far as it goes.”

“Then what’s the attraction?”

“She’s a cheerleader. She’s popular. And she’s got that vacant look down to a science.” His hand moved down, resting on her shoulder as she shrugged. “She’s happy to stand there and be decoration. I guess that’s what he needs.” A quiet laugh escaped. “Looks beat out brains hands down, I suppose. According to him, I always had an opinion and wouldn’t just blend into the background. It drove him nuts, so he traded me in for a better model.”

“Better model?” His brow arched in surprise. “I seriously doubt it.”

“Maybe so, but most guys would do the exact same thing he did.”

“What?” His eyes narrowed as he looked down at her again. “What makes you say that?”

“I can remember a time when even you were blinded by a cheerleader skirt with blonde hair, Josh. Besides, it’s kind of obvious.” She reached down, her fingers plucking at the material of her dress. “I’m not exactly beauty queen material here. That goes a long way. They say you should look for the ideal package. You know … looks, brains, personality and all that mess. Brains and personality, I’ve got, but those are the minor checks. If you’re missing that major check, then you can pretty much forget about it.”

Silence settled heavily as he studied her, carefully gauging the battle she was having with her insecurity, not quite achieving the indifference she was aiming for. “He really did a number on you, didn’t he?”

“Huh?”

“Since when do you worry about how you look or what some guy thinks of you?”

“Everybody’s self-conscious. Why do you think the people behind M-A-C, Neutrogena and American Eagle are billionaires?” The corner of her mouth quirked slightly. “I’ve always worried about it, just like every other girl our age. There’s just no sense in making a big deal out of it when there’s really not much I can do to improve it.” Her head bobbed back and forth. “Well, except for plastic surgery, but I’m not into that.”

“Don’t ever change yourself, Jen. For anybody.” She looked down when his fingers wrapped around hers, his thumb brushing over her knuckles. “You’re gorgeous, inside and out, with or without M-A-C and American Eagle. You’re smart, funny, sarcastic, honest, opinionated and caring. If a guy can’t appreciate you for what you are, then he isn’t worth your time.” His free hand moved up to tuck a few stray curls behind her ear. “Just be patient. Someday, a guy’s going to come along and completely sweep you off your feet, and all those jerks who missed out will be kicking themselves for passing up on one of the best.”

“Thanks. I needed to hear that.” A smile curved her lips as she stretched up to kiss his cheek. “Why can’t I find a guy like you?”

“Because I’m one of a kind.” His arm squeezed around her in half a hug, his silly grin making her laugh. “Come on, Cinderella. It’s late and I should be getting back to the house.” When he heard her groan, he pushed himself up from the seat and reached down to pull her up after him. “Let’s go. I’ll walk you to the door.”

He followed her up the steps and waited on the porch until she was standing on the tiles in the foyer. She dropped her small purse, keys and crown on the table just inside the door, then gave him a bright smile and stepped forward to wrap her arms around his neck, hugging him tightly. “Thank you so much, Josh. This was the best night ever.”

“It was my pleasure.” Without a second thought, he leaned down and pressed his lips to her cheek, then pulled away slightly before turning to kiss her softly on the mouth.

The jolt that passed through him was unexpected, a lightning bolt streaking from the top of his head all the way down to his toes, a tingly crawling sensation on the back of his neck, where her fingers were. After only a few seconds of contact, he moved back, unable to keep his eyes from going directly to her lips. There was a moment’s hesitation as he stared at her, making a quick decision to step away completely, ignoring that urge to pull her closer and show her what a real kiss would be like. Instead, he pasted a smile on his face and gestured toward the stairs. “Go on and get some sleep. I’ll talk to you later.”

“Good night.” He could feel how her gaze stayed on him as he turned, watching him until he was almost to the car before he heard the soft thump of the door closing.

Taking a deep breath, he opened the car’s door and slid behind the wheel, only to run his hands over his face, staring hard at her window until he saw the white curtains moving, her shadowy form appearing behind the glass. He sat there for just a second longer, his fingers tapping against his lips, then heaved a sigh and started the car, throwing the gear into reverse and backing out of the driveway.

*********************

Jen slipped her shoes off at the door and ran up the stairs, her dress whispering against her legs as she went. She flew through her bedroom door and jumped on the bed, scooting over to the window. Resting her cheek on her hand, she watched him back out of the driveway and head down the street until he turned at the corner. A dreamy smile formed, and a sigh escaped from her lips. Then she realized exactly what she was doing.

Wait, wait, wait. What’s up with this?

Her eyes widened, her head turning to catch her shocked expression in the reflection of the mirror. She stared at herself, well aware of the softened areas around her eyes, the relaxed places around her mouth, evidence of the things she’d been trying to ignore all night.

What am I doing? He’s my best friend. I can’t fall for him.

She shook her head against the insanity, immediately trying to remind herself of all the reasons why it was impossible that they’d ever be able to make it work. Everyone at the dance had been shocked to see him, even more so to see him there with her. Not that there was anything wrong with her. As he’d said, she was some type of pretty, smart, funny. She’d been voted Prom Queen, for God’s sake.

A fact that hadn’t been appreciated by some, even if it was a joke.

Macie’s words kept echoing in her mind, making her flinch against the thoughts they evoked. At the sink in the women’s restroom: “It’s just a stupid crown, anyway. I knew Luke was getting you nominated, but I didn’t think people would actually vote for you.” And then, as they were walking back out to find their dates: “You know, it’s a total waste that he’s here with you. Maybe he’ll be open to more adult company.”

In a way, she had to concede that the irritating, self-centered blonde was right. He’d grown up a lot over the past couple of years, was making a place for himself in front of those cameras in Florida. Down there in Mickey Mouse land, he’d changed his name and perfected the image they wanted him to portray, while she’d been up here, living an ordinary life and being the everyday average teenager, still holding on to her innocent, naïve view of the world.

And it had been painfully obvious that things were changing when they’d walked into the dance. People who’d never said a word to him before the show stopped him to chat, as if he was their close friend. Everyone had called him JC all night – something she just couldn’t bring herself to do. At least, not yet. Maybe with time, she’d grow accustomed to calling him that. It was only a nickname, anyway. Not such a big deal.

To the world, he was JC but, to her, he was still just Josh.

Josh, her best friend.

Like always.

But tonight … tonight something had been different.

When she’d finally gotten over the shock of seeing him, she hadn’t been able to help noticing how … well, how utterly gorgeous he was in his suit. For the first time, she’d looked at him and hadn’t seen the boy she’d grown up with, but had seen a guy – a good looking guy – standing there, waiting to take her out. She’d never noticed his dark features before. Or how he knew exactly what to wear to accent those blue eyes of his. Or that grin.

Good Lord, that grin.

Shaking her head, a sigh escaped, common sense telling her that the last portion of that thought wasn’t entirely true. Ever since they were kids, she’d been the biggest victim of his smile, letting it sway her even when she had the strongest of resolve. It didn’t matter what he’d done, all he’d had to do was smile and she’d given him the forgiveness she’d always tried to hold back.

That smile of his had always been her weakness, but tonight it’d made her want to go weak in an entirely different way.

Her eyes narrowed, considering her previous train of thought. All of those things were just on the appearance front. The way he’d acted … now that was a completely different story. Finally moving away from the window, she pulled the pins from her hair and thought over the night, picking out the small details.

Some of the things he’d done – putting his hand on the small of her back to lead her through doors, the way he’d held her as they’d danced, the odd looks he’d been giving her since he’d picked her up, draping his jacket around her shoulders as they’d left the country club – had definitely seemed more than friendly.

He’d been openly staring all night, watching her like a hawk. By now, she was well aware of what his stare felt like. She’d grown up with it, and while she was oblivious to any other person’s focus, she was definitely acquainted with his. From time to time, she’d been able to pick it out during class, or when she’d gone shopping with her mother and hadn’t known that he was anywhere around, but he’d never used it as intently as he had tonight. She’d felt his eyes on her, nearly burning her, almost never leaving her whenever she was away from him for any amount of time. If she was honest, she had to admit that, while it’d been a tad bit unnerving, she’d liked being the center of his attention.

He’d acted overly protective – nearly possessive – of her, not allowing anyone to cut in once the entire night. Not that she was going to complain, she’d rather enjoyed having him hold her, breathing in his cologne, but it hadn’t been what she was used to. She wasn’t quite sure what she had expected, but it certainly hadn’t been for him to act like he was …

Stopping her thought short, she stared at her reflection in the mirror, trying to convince herself that she hadn’t been about to compare his behavior to that of a boyfriend.

Sure, he’d been clingy, but he usually was when he came home. For those first few days, he tended to hover, always needing some kind of contact, whether it was a hug or just an arm around her shoulders. It’d been that way since the show started, so it wasn’t anything new.

And he’d always been protective of her, ever since they’d met. It was as if he’d made it his mission to be her hero. Tonight, he’d taken that to an all-new level. The look on his face as he’d sized up Luke had been outright lethal. Josh wasn’t the fighting type – he was too laid back for that – but she truly believed that if Luke had made any kind of move to touch her while they were standing there, he would’ve lost his cool and started swinging.

Again, her brain told her that this wasn’t anything new, he’d always taken the role of older brother, trying to shield her from what he thought would cause her pain. But she’d seen his expression when she’d turned to him for the King-Queen dance, that odd mix of relief and something else softening his eyes, and she’d felt how tightly he’d held her as they’d swayed to what she’d come to think of as ‘their’ song. She’d seen the knowing glances in the crowd over his shoulder, and something in her was screaming that this time, those looks were justified.

Immediately, she shook her head against the thought, common sense leaping in to deny that anything of the sort was even possible.

But even denying it couldn’t change what had happened downstairs only a few minutes ago.

He’d been kissing her on the hand, cheek and forehead for so long, she couldn’t even remember when it had started, but tonight … he’d kissed her on the lips. That was definitely different. She would have expected his typical quick peck, but not what could very well have been a real kiss. And she certainly hadn’t expected to feel the electric sizzle that had coursed through her at the contact. Absently, her fingers touched her mouth, as if trying to remember the soft feeling of his lips against hers, the tightening of his arms around her as contact was made.

Sure, Luke had kissed her several times during their time together, but he’d always acted as though she was sub-par, leaving her with an indifference about the whole thing. With Josh … as soon as it’d been over, she’d had to fight against her instincts, forcing herself not to wrap her arms around his neck and pull him back to her, kissing him in the way that she’d suddenly found herself wanting to be kissed. By him. She couldn’t keep herself from imagining it: the clinging, the contact, the closeness, arms, hands, lips. Everything she’d read about in her mother’s hand-me-down romance novels.

Her mind rejected this idea as well, just as a peculiar melting feeling settled around her stomach, making her groan softly in acceptance.

Okay, so maybe I can fall for him. But there’s no way he feels the same.

There’d been an odd look across his features as he’d pulled away, a mix of surprise and … something else. But it had disappeared almost immediately, his signature smile taking its place.

What had that look meant? Had he felt the same spark she’d felt? Was he as confused as she was? Or had her mind finally taken a long walk off a short pier, leaving her absolutely dim-witted?

The questions remained unanswered, her mind whirling round and round as she thought of how he’d be leaving soon, going back to the Club set and all the ‘beautiful’ people in the cast. No way would he settle for her when he had Nikki and Keri and whoever else hanging around him – all the girls who’d made it clear they weren’t happy to see her when they’d brought her down for his birthday a few years ago. Not that it even mattered. She’d known since the sixth grade that he only saw her as a friend, a confidante. In no way was she girlfriend material. Not for him, anyway.

This wasn’t one of her romance novels. She and Josh definitely weren’t the images she conjured up when she read about people who were meant to be, coming together and building relationships that could only happen in her dreams.

And she wasn’t even positive that she wanted more than the friendship.

But if it meant that he’d kiss her again …

She sighed, trying to banish the confusing feelings and thoughts from her world.

Minutes later, when she laid her head on her pillow, visions of him and that grin leapt behind her closed lids, her lips tingling as if he’d just pulled away from her. Swallowing hard as she stared through the darkness at the ceiling, she allowed the tears to fill her eyes, spilling over to run down her cheeks.

This is going to hurt. A lot.

*********************

He sat at the dining room table, trying his best not to stare at the pictures spread across the tabletop.

For the first time since he’d come home, he was alone in the house, blessed silence hanging all around him. He was grateful for the quiet, but at the same time, he’d give anything for an interruption to the thoughts seeming to fly in circles around him, rapidly driving him to mental dizziness. Forcing his gaze to the window across the room, he focused on the squirrels running through the branches of the tree in the side yard, but couldn’t stop his body from swaying to the beat of the song repeating over and over in his head.

“When I see you smile, I can face the world …” The words escaped his throat before he could stop them and he groaned, running a hand over his face. “My God. I really have lost it. It was just a dance. That’s all. She’s the same Jen that she’s always been. She’s still Boof. There’s nothing different about her.”

The more he tried not to think about it, the more memories rushed forward to replay yet again. He chewed on his lip and looked at the photos again, sighing heavily when he finally gave in and let his mind roam free.

She may not have changed, but he’d definitely seen her differently the other night. When her eyes had lit up at the sight of him, that smile he knew so well brightening her face, and she’d thrown her arms around him … something had clicked. Maybe it was the light floral scent of her perfume or maybe it had been the way she’d felt against him, her soft curves grabbing his attention and refusing to let go. Whatever it was, he couldn’t explain it. But something had changed.

He just wished he knew what it was.

They’d been to dances together before, had been going as a pair since grade school, but they’d always pretty much gone their own ways, dancing with each other several times, but networking out to other partners as well. This time, he hadn’t wanted to let her go, hadn’t let anyone else dance with her. She hadn’t seemed to mind one bit, but then she hadn’t given any kind of sign that she noticed something felt different, either.

So maybe it was just him. Or maybe she truly was oblivious to the male eyes that always seemed to turn her way. His included.

He hadn’t been able to keep from looking at her, watching her whenever she’d walked away to go talk to someone or to hit the punch bowl, trying to tell himself that he was just trying to figure out if there was something about her appearance that had changed. The heels she’d been wearing had made her a little taller – almost the perfect height to be held against him – and she’d styled her hair differently, but neither of those could be it. It wasn’t something that simple.

For a split second, he wished with everything he had that it was simple, so that he would know what was going on. He wanted to know why he couldn’t get this song out of his head, why it reminded him of her in every way. He wanted to know why he’d kissed her … and why, after he’d pulled away, he’d immediately wanted to do it again, take it further.

The only explanation that he could come up with was that he’d missed her. But that didn’t make sense, because he’d been missing her since he’d moved to Florida and there hadn’t been anything different whenever he’d come home before or when they’d talked on the phone.

Well, except for the little incident last Thanksgiving. And the time she’d called to tell him she was going out with Dingess.

But other than those times, everything had been normal.

Kind of.

“Ugh!” He sat back in the chair and covered his face with his hands. “Maybe I’m just losing my mind. Maybe I need a girlfriend. God only knows.” The shrill ringing of the cordless phone lying beside him made him jump, and he fumbled with it for a minute before hitting the button to answer. “Hello?”

“Hey man, how’d it go?”

“Hey.” His eyes rolled sharply as he shook his head. Justin. Perfect. Just what he needed. “It went fine. It was just a dance.”

“Yeah, right, it was just a dance. You went to the prom with your best friend, who happens to be one of the finest things I’ve ever seen. I’m telling you, she’s the reason why God created women. Can you bring her back with you? I want to meet her.”

“J, she’s staying here. But I will bring some of the pictures with me.”

“Great. Something new for me to drool over. How’d she look?”

“She was … beautiful. Gorgeous.” He cleared his throat quickly, averting his eyes from the photo in front of him, trying to distract himself from the unnerving thoughts the image provoked. “Every guy was staring at her all night, even before she won Prom Queen.”

“That doesn’t tell me much, but tell her congrats from me. That’s awesome.”

“Will do.” His gaze automatically strayed back to the picture and he gave a quiet sigh, flipping it over so he couldn’t see it. “Listen, will you and your mom be going out of town anytime soon?”

“I don’t think so. We’ve only got two weeks in this break, so I think we’re just sticking around here until the show picks back up.”

“Okay.” Agitated, his fingers tapped the table nervously, then flipped the glossy paper over again, revealing their pose. “Great.”

“Why?”

“No reason. I was just thinking about coming back early. Like, maybe tomorrow.”

“Really? I figured you’d want to spend as much time as you could with your family and Jen.”

“It’s great being home, but …” His voice trailed off and he ran a finger over the photo, his fingertip tracing her arm as his stare glued to her smile.

“But what?”

“But …” An odd tingling feeling came to his lips as he studied her mouth and he closed his eyes with a frustrated sigh. “But if I spend much more time with Jenny, I think I might do something stupid.”

“Stupid? What do you …” Justin’s voice faded out as realization dawned. There was a moment of silence, then he burst forth with a laugh. “I knew it!”

“Of course you did.” A raspy groan rattled at the back of JC’s throat as he shook his head. “Go ahead and say it, kid. Here’s your chance.”

“This is awesome!” The glee in his voice was obvious. “I told you it would happen sooner or later.”

“I didn’t believe you then and I’m really not sure that I believe it now.”

“What?” Justin’s tone was tinged with confusion. “Man, that totally made no sense.”

“Maybe not to you …”

“What happened?”

“I don’t know. One minute I’m waiting for her to come downstairs so I can surprise her.” He paused, swallowing as he remembered. “The next, she’s hugging me, all decked out in this amazing dress, and I can smell her perfume and …”

“And what?”

“I think …” His fingers rubbed against his closed eyelids, trying to avert the headache he felt coming on. “I think it finally sank in that she’s a girl.”

“Right.” A short laugh carried over the line. “Well, Jace, I hate to break it to you, but she’s always been a girl.”

“Okay, that sounded stupid.” Another groan reverberated through his chest. “It’s just … I’ve never thought of her as anything but Jen. You know, my buddy, my friend, the person who knows me better than anybody else.”

“Save that load of bull for someone else. I know what happened at Thanksgiving, remember? You and Steve were talking about it.”

“Yeah, I know.” The answer was growled into the receiver. “And I remember Lynn catching you listening in on that conversation, too.”

“That’s not the point. The point is that you’ve seen her as a girl for a while. It’s nothing new.”

“Well, yeah. I guess you’re right. But it’s not the same as that now.”

“What’s different about it?”

“Before, it was kind of like I was just seeing pieces of it, but not putting it together. Now, it’s slapping me in the face. It’s like … I can’t stop looking at her. No … I don’t want to stop looking at her.” For a moment, he only stuttered as he tried to put it into words. “And I keep noticing … stuff.”

“Stuff, huh?” The grin was evident in Justin’s tone. “What kind of stuff are we talking about?”

“Like how pretty she looks with her hair pulled up, and how nice it felt to dance with her, and how hearing her laugh makes me want to smile, and … and …”

“So, back in November you finally started seeing her as something other than the person who was always there. Now, you’re realizing that she is definitely a female – a very fine female – and you’re noticing all the things that come along with that. Right?”

“Yeah. I guess.”

“That’s perfectly normal, Jace.”

“No, it’s not. This is anything but normal.” He slapped his open palm against the table. “Good God, Justin. I kissed her!”

“Seriously?”

“Yeah.”

“Well, how was it?”

“Um, right.” Blue eyes rolled to the ceiling, an exasperated laugh bouncing off the walls. “Like I’m gonna give you details.”

“Fine, keep quiet. But just so you know, that gives me a pretty good idea, C. What did she do after?”

“She … she smiled.”

“And then what did you do?”

“I said good night and went and sat in the car for a few minutes. At least, I think I said good night. It’s kinda fuzzy. But that doesn’t really matter, I don’t guess.” He sighed. “Anyway, I just sat there and stared at her window, like some kind of psycho stalker.”

“You just sat there? Why?”

“Because I couldn’t decide if I wanted to go back and kiss her again.” His hand ran over his face. “My God. This can’t be happening.”

“Okay, so you kiss her, she doesn’t punch you and you’re acting like the gates of hell have opened and Satan himself is about to push you in.” The younger voice rang with confusion. “What kind of crack are you smoking? When you make a move like that on a girl like Jen and she smiles at you, it’s always a good thing, Jace.”

“You’re joking, right? I kissed my best friend!”

“Yeah, I got that part. I also get that she wasn’t complaining.”

“But … ugh!” His groan was so loud that it echoed through the house and he stood, moving around the table to burn off some nervous energy. “This is the worst thing that could happen.” There was a rustling in the bushes outside as the squirrels began playing underneath the window.

“Why?”

“Because this could ruin everything. Everything, J.” He tapped his fingers over the photo yet again. “She’s such a big part of my life …” His voice trailed off.

“Exactly. That’s why it’s so perfect. You’re already pretty much joined at the hip, so why don’t you just go with it?”

“Because I don’t want to do anything that’ll hurt us. I don’t want to screw up our friendship.”

“Just think, Jace. This … this could be so much better than the friendship. Go with it and see what happens. Trust me on this.”

“Yeah, like I’m going to take the advice of a kid who still thinks Ariel is one of the hottest women he’s ever seen.” He rolled his eyes and laughed dryly. “I’m leaving soon, Justin. The last thing I want is to start up something and have to make it a long distance thing right at the start.” A deep sigh escaped and he plopped back down in the chair. “She doesn’t do long distance, anyway. That’s why she didn’t give Tony more of a chance.” His stare focused on the wall across the room, his brain moving at warp speed. “Besides, what if I’m going through withdrawals? I haven’t dated anybody in months. What if I’m just looking for that, and she’s the first person I’ve seen? I can’t do that to her. I can’t wreck what we’ve got just because I’m looking for the next available girl to come along.”

“So what are you gonna do about it?”

“Do about it?” He looked back down and flipped the picture over, hiding the image once again. “Nothing.”

“Jace, you can’t just do nothing. Come on, man. What are you so scared of?”

“I’m more than scared, man. I’m terrified … terrified of what something like this could do to me. To us. I just can’t risk it.” A lump began to form in his throat, and he swallowed hard to fight it down. “We’re friends, J. The best of friends. She’s the only person I can go to with absolutely anything, who won’t judge me unless I ask her to, who I can trust to give me a totally honest opinion. I can’t take the chance of screwing that up. I can’t risk hurting her.”

There was a brief pause, then Justin spoke quietly. “You can’t risk hurting her, or you can’t risk hurting yourself?”

“I think … both.” His teeth worked on his lip. “I don’t want to hurt her, but I don’t want to get hurt, either. I’ve seen her hurt before, I know exactly how it feels to see her going through it. If I had to see that look on her face and know it was because of me … it’d kill me, J. It’d kill me.” He sighed. “And if I take the chance on it, there’s a huge possibility she’s going to laugh in my face …”

“She wouldn’t do that, Jace.”

“No, I know.” He closed his eyes and rested his forehead on the table top. “But if she gave me the look I’ve seen her give before, to other guys … I couldn’t handle that.”

“So you do nothing.”

“Right.”

“And when she calls to tell you about how she’s going out with one guy or another?”

“Then I’ll deal with it.” Just the idea made him flinch. “I’ve dealt with it before, so … I’ll have to deal with it, because I can’t take the risk of my other choice.” His forehead tapped painfully against the wood of the table. “This has to be a phase. It has to be. I’ll get back to the set, ask one of the girls out, and everything will go back to normal. The way it’s supposed to be.”

“And what if it’s not a phase? What if it just gets worse the next time you see her or talk to her?”

“That’s not going to happen.” He sat up, running his fingers through his hair roughly. “I’ll get over this, whatever it is. I will.”

I have to.

*********************

“I kissed my best friend! Ugh, this is the worst thing that could happen.”

She heard him moving toward the window and turned to race back up the path that joined their houses, her legs catching in some of the bushes as she ran. Stumbling, she fought to right herself, then put her head down and made her way home as fast as her feet would carry her, never even realizing that tears were streaming down her cheeks until she was up the stairs and back in the safety of her bedroom.

“Well, I guess that answers that question.” A watery laugh escaped as she reached out for the teddy bear he’d brought her from Disney World last year, cuddling it to her chest as her shaky knees gave out and she dropped down to sit on the floor by the bed. Burying her face in the bear’s fur, she felt the dam – and her heart – shatter into pieces, sobs wracking her entire body as her tears soaked into the stuffed animal.

For what seemed like hours, she cried out her pain, curling onto her side on the carpet, the bear abandoned as she wrapped her arms around her midsection in a weak attempt to keep herself from flying apart.

Finally, there wasn’t enough energy left for another sob or sniffle, and she pushed herself up from the floor, picking the bear up and returning him to the bed. Turning toward the door, she caught a glimpse of herself in the mirror. Moving closer to her reflection, she couldn’t fight back the wry, self-admonishing smile she’d been giving herself since February.

“Seriously, Jen?” Her fingers combed through her tangled hair before her hands came down to scrub at her tear-stained cheeks. “You really thought there was a chance he could want you?” Brown eyes trailed over the image of her small frame, her curved figure draped in the old shirt he’d given her. She was a far cry from fat – or even thick, for that matter – but she certainly wasn’t blessed with the figure and stature that most of his girlfriends were equipped with. “Look at yourself, stupid. Sure, he tried to make you feel better about everything, but he pretty much came straight out and said you couldn’t have him.”

“He’s one of a kind, remember?” She glared at the mirror. “As idiotic as he is, Luke was right about a few things. You’re a dime a dozen, girl. Nothing special. Totally unremarkable. You haven’t grown an inch since eighth grade, pasta is one of your favorite foods and you had to do your own makeup and hair.” Her eyelids squeezed shut as she tried to imagine what she must have looked like coming down those stairs. “A juvenile, brunette Miss Piggy, less a bit of bacon. Why would he ever want you?”

“This was a date, but we’re not dating.”

“My God.” She froze as another part of their conversation from the other night came rushing back to her, dropping down into the chair she’d used while applying her makeup. “He practically told me so, tried to let me down easy. And that was before he gave me the pep talk.” Covering her face in embarrassment, she groaned to herself. “Mom called him, he came home a few days early and took me to a dance. I was a damn pity date.”

Suddenly, everything that had seemed so special about going to the prom with him lost its sparkle, common sense casting a dark shadow over the entire night. He hadn’t been staring at her because he’d been seeing her differently, but because he was her friend and wanted to make sure she was okay. The odd looks were probably because it’d been the prom, so she’d dressed accordingly – far more formal than any other dance they’d ever gone to. He’d given her his jacket because it was cool outside, and her dress had been completely lacking in coverage. The knowing glances from the crowd hadn’t been because they thought there was more between them than friendship, but rather an expression of how she was delusional if she believed that were the case.

He hadn’t held her closely while they danced or refrained from other dance partners for any other reason than Luke being there, watching the entire thing. Her gaze jumped around the room, taking in all the photos of them growing up together. He was her best, closest friend and – as he’d said – he would always be there to help dish out a little revenge. It was her mistake in assuming he’d been referring to just the King-Queen dance, rather than the night as a whole.

And never mind how easily hearts got tangled up when revenge was involved.

But what about that kiss? Why would he have kissed her at the front door? There was no one there to watch, so unless he knew something she didn’t, revenge hadn’t carried all the way home. Unless …

What if he’d been legitimately curious?

Her eyes widened as she looked once again at her reflection in the mirror, swallowing hard at the inevitable conclusion. They’d been a fixture in each other’s lives for so long, it wasn’t a stretch to consider that maybe he’d held a bit of wonder about how it’d be to kiss her. He hadn’t had a girlfriend in a while, and – as far as she knew – it didn’t seem that he’d been dating recently, either.

“Ugh, this is the worst thing that could happen.”

She hadn’t been able to hear the other side of his conversation, and it didn’t take much to imagine that not only had the kiss been his worst, but the very fact that he’d kissed her could potentially be one of the worst things he’d experienced.

“You really need to work on the ‘hands on’ part of a relationship, Jen. You barely moved me at all.”

Luke’s cruel words rang in her ears and she cringed, hugging her arms around herself again as – impossibly – a fresh wave of tears began building. “Okay, Luke. Score two for you.” Getting up from the chair, she retrieved her journal and a pen from the desk, then sprawled across the bed, flipping to the next fresh page, jotting down the hurtful words from today. Once she had those down, she turned to the next page, paying no attention to the tears staining the paper as they fell from her chin, scrawling quickly through line after line, some making up small poems, some becoming phrases or choruses that would eventually grow into songs.

Some time later, her writing slowed until she felt a numbness in her fingers, and she knew that she couldn’t put another word to the paper. The pen fell to the comforter, her journal flipping closed as she pushed it aside and rolled onto her back to stare at the ceiling.

“Luke is a waste of space, but Josh … I can’t be without Josh.” She spoke to the empty room, working out the situation in her cluttered mind. Getting past the whole incident and retaining a sense of normalcy in their friendship was necessary, because she knew that she couldn’t lose him. It didn’t matter that she was likely connected to one of his worst experiences. He was the bright spot that kept life bearable, the other half of her sanity, and he was essential to her sense of self.

Despite what she’d heard him say, she had no doubt that he would never intentionally hurt her. If he knew that she’d heard his conversation, that he’d crushed her … it would turn his world upside down. Things would never be the same between them again.

And that was unacceptable.

“Get over it, Jen.” Sitting up on the bed, she sent a determined glare toward her reflection. “You’ll get over it, or you’ll lose him. He’s your best friend. You can still love him, but it’ll never be what you were stupid enough to hope for. Accept that you’ll never be enough for him and move on. Be normal. Be happy. Smile around him. Just keep it up for another week, then he’ll be back in Florida and you can fall apart. By the time he comes home again, it’ll all be okay.” A quick nod at herself closed the pep talk and she rolled off the mattress and strode out of the room.

It turned out that she needn’t have worried herself, as he was gone the next day, the light blinking on her answering machine alerting her to the only parting words she would get out of him. The message ended, a few tears fell, and she felt a bit of her spirit beginning to shrivel as she reached for her journal again, wondering if things were already beyond repair.

But it wasn’t until two weeks later – when Ty let it slip about his latest girlfriend, Andrea – that Jen realized the lingering effects of falling for him. The news ripped her heart to shreds … and part of her soul lost its joy.

August 26, 1994

Wearily, she dragged herself through the front door, closing her eyes in the silence of the empty house. Nine hours of looking at the Gap and dealing with its mostly middle school and junior high clientele was enough to make her want to crawl under the covers and hibernate for a week. Especially considering that she had to be up bright and early tomorrow morning to go through it all over again, this time with the Saturday, weekend crowds.

She walked through the kitchen, dropping her keys and wallet on the table before moving to the refrigerator, her gaze darting over to the clock on the microwave.

8:10.

The evening was already nearly halfway gone, and she was worn down, ready to crash on the couch with the remote and whatever leftovers her mother had left for her. Another Friday night spent alone in front of the television.

“So much for partying my way into eighteen.” With a sigh, she reached out and pulled the wrapped plate from the refrigerator shelf, then let the door fall shut behind her.

Not even inspecting what was on the covered plate, she peeled back the cellophane wrap and popped it into the microwave, sinking down into one of the kitchen chairs as she waited for her supper to heat. Her eyes darted over to the stack of textbooks on the counter, a small smile forming as she became thankful for the end of the summer semester. It’d taken a chunk of her savings, her scholarship not taking effect until the fall semester began, but she was glad to have those pre-requisite classes out of the way. The more basics she could cram in this year, the more she could concentrate on her core classes once she transferred.

Of course, her mother had insisted on using her college fund for this one year, but Jen had dug in her heels … just as she had at the offer of a car. The long hours working were horrendous, but the money she’d been able to put away had enabled her to buy her own vehicle – a little blue Tracker that she loved – and she felt better knowing that the fund would be there for whenever she made it to a university.

Scholarships were handy, but not always available, and she knew the more classes she could take each semester, the fewer years she’d have to spend in the classroom, draining whatever funds she had at her disposal. She’d done her research, choosing three universities as possible transfer schools, determining what general classes were potentially transferable credits, counting as courses already taken toward her Bachelor’s degree.

A beep sounded as the microwave cut off, announcing that her dinner was heated to her liking, and she mentally checked off her course list for the upcoming semester as she got up to fetch the food.

At this rate, she figured she could have a good start on her general education requirements, allowing for a lighter course load in semesters to come. With any luck, some of the courses required for her Music Composition concentration would carry over as well, or, in the very least, prepare her for courses that were coming later. If she committed herself to classes during the summer semesters as well, she could be finishing up in four years or so.

That was the plan, anyway.

The hot plate burned her fingers and she hissed, quickly setting it down on the counter to cool and moving to the sink, running cold water over her fingertips until the tingling stopped. Looking over, she saw the smoke rising from the food and shook her head at her tired foolishness.

She reached out and cut off the water, standing still in the silence. Back in February, her mother had taken a second shift clerical job at the hospital where she worked. The hours were longer, but there was less stress and more money, so it’d obviously been the right thing for her to do. While Jen was reaching the final leg of her work day at six or seven in the evening, Lisa was just reaching the halfway point of hers, the hours stretching late into the night.

Usually, it was fine. After being surrounded by the masses all day, Jen loved having the house to herself, enjoyed the freedom of being alone during those evening hours.

But tonight, she’d give anything to have company.

“Spending your birthday alone sucks.”

The words echoed off the kitchen walls as she walked back over to the fridge, pulling out an icy bottle of water to go with her dinner. She reached into the drawer for a fork and the heavenly smell of the food on the plate wafted over to her, pulling her eyes up to finally take inventory of the steaming meal. Lasagna, corn, mashed potatoes and garlic bread … an odd combination, but her favorites, nonetheless.

There hadn’t seemed to be a point behind having a cake laying out when they couldn’t sit down and enjoy it together, so she’d made the logical request for no cake to be made, promising her mother they could go out for dessert one day the following week. Of course, Lisa had protested, insisting on making the traditional chocolate cake, but Jen had assured her that it would be fine.

Now, she regretted the decision, longed for the sweet, sugary dessert that always seemed to be the highlight of the party. But there really wasn’t anything she could do about it, unless she wanted to make the cake herself and that would sort of defeat the purpose. It’d be fun, if she weren’t too tired to deal with the mess. So she’d leave it be. It was just a cake, after all. Nothing major.

Cautiously, her fingers tested the rim of the plate, a small smile forming when it was just the right temperature, and she gathered up her food and drink to make her way to the love-seat sized couch. Sole possession of a television remote was a wonderful thing. The plate was set down on the coffee table, the water taking residence on a coaster as her eyes narrowed on the square of paper covering the controller.

I taped the show for you. Make sure you watch it before nine. Happy birthday, sweetie. Mom.

“Before nine?” She checked the clock on the VCR. “Thirty-five minutes. Just enough time.”

Her finger pressed the buttons on the remote, smiling at the familiar opening scrolling brightly across the screen, and settled back to enjoy her dinner while she watched.

Twenty-five minutes later, her plate had been cleared, her shoes had been kicked off and she was curled up on the sofa, not really seeing what the big deal was. Her eyelids were becoming heavy and she could feel them sliding closed halfway through a skit, but when the announcement for the closing number was made, they flew open wide and she sat straight up on the cushions.

“No way did she just say …”

As the familiar chords floated from the speakers, the camera panning back to show JC and Tony sitting on the stage, the denial died on her lips, unfinished.

Whenever I’m weary
From the battles that rage in my head
You make sense of madness
When my sanity hangs by a thread
I lose my way but still you seem to understand
Now and forever I will be your man

“Oh my God … he did it.” She slipped off the couch, sliding over until she was on her knees in front of the television. “He really did it.” Her fingers came up to the screen and, ignoring that weird fuzzy feeling against her fingertips, traced the areas around him on the picture. His eyes were closed for much of the performance, opening only briefly to view the audience, his hand seeming to move of its own accord as he lost himself in the lyrics. A smile spread across her lips as she let her thumb move over his forehead on the screen. “That’s it, Josh. Perfect.”

The song was over entirely too soon, and she immediately reached up, pressing the rewind button to play it again.

Just as it was ending for the second time, the phone rang, jerking her out of the semi-trance she’d lost herself in. Absently, she paused the tape and, her eyes still glued to the television set, backed away to grab the cordless unit from the side table, turning it on as she brought it to her ear. “Hello?”

“Happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you …”

She grinned as the familiar voice sang the child-like song, leaning back until she could rest against the front of the couch. “Hey.”

“Hey, Boof. So, how’d you like it?”

“I can’t believe you did that.” Her head shook back and forth, as if he were there to see it. “It was perfect.”

“No dedication or anything …” His smile was obvious in his tone. “But I thought it’d work.”

“I love it.” She laughed. “I was just getting ready to watch it again.”

“Yeah, I figured.” He cleared his throat, the rough sound carrying softly over the line. “Before you do that, though, go up to your room.”

“My room? What for?”

“You’ll see. Just go.”

“Okay, I’m going.” Her brow furrowed as she pushed herself up from the floor and moved out of the room. “What are you up to?”

“Nothing.” The overplayed innocence in his voice made her grin as she ran up the stairs.

“Yeah, right.” She paused with her hand on the doorknob. “Just tell me if I need to get ready to be scared to death.”

“Nope. It’s all good. Just go in.”

“All right. Here goes.” Turning the knob, she pushed the door open, laughing when the multi-colored balloons littered across her ceiling danced. “What’s this?”

“Part two of your present. Be careful, or they’ll get stuck in your hair.”

“Huh?” Her eyebrow arched in confusion.

A sigh escaped. “Check the balloon strings, Jenny.”

She reached up, catching one of the strings and pulling it closer so that she could get a better look at the small object she could now see dangling from the ribbon. “A piano charm?”

“Yep.” His voice lifted, bringing her an immediate mental image of the grin he undoubtedly wore. “The bracelet should be hanging there somewhere.”

“Josh …” Her fingers tightened around the small silver piano. “Thank you. I’ve always wanted a charm bracelet.”

“I know. I had a blast picking out all the little pieces. Remind me later to explain the charms. Some of them should be obvious but the rest …” He trailed off and she could picture him shrugging. “Look over at your desk.”

Brown eyes turned quickly away from the charm, focusing on a stack of leather-bound notebooks. “More journals?”

“A little birdie told me you were almost out of space in the ones I got you for Christmas.”

“Yeah, I’ve only got a few blank pages in the last one.” She walked over, letting her fingers move over the smooth covers, tracing the J that was burned in script in the upper right-hand corner. Biting her lip, she thought of all the pages she’d filled this past summer, pouring her heart out over that one perfectly horrendous night. “You realize I’ve already got three shelves full of these, right?”

“Well, I’m hoping that one day I’ll turn on the radio and hear some famous person singing your thoughts.”

“You and me both.” Her smile grew as she picked up the book on the top of the stack and flipped it open. “They’re perfect, Josh. Thank you so much.”

“You’re welcome.” Soft laughter met her ear. “But I’m not done yet. Part three should be getting there any minute.”

“Are you kidding?” Her eyes widened. “The song was enough for me.”

“I kinda figured you’d think so. But it wasn’t enough for me.” The doorbell rang downstairs. “There it is. Can you handle all those balloons?”

“Yeah, I can get them.”

“Good. Take them with you and answer the door.”

“Yes, sir.” She saluted the empty room with a laugh, then gathered up the strings and hurried down the stairs, cradling the phone between her shoulder and ear so that she could pull the door open.

Heather and Tyler stood on the porch, all smiles as they pushed past her, carrying what looked like a cake box. They walked into the kitchen, set the box down and lifted the lid, revealing the iced cake that she’d requested not be made.

“A cake? But I told her not to …”

“She made it over at our house this morning and left it there. Give the kids a hug and tell them thanks from me.”

She obliged, hugging both of them tightly with her free arm, mouthing a quiet thanks before they walked out the door, pulling it closed behind them. “Okay, are you finished now?”

“Not quite. Read the cake.”

“What?” Shaking her head, she read the words aloud. “‘Happy Birthday, Jen. Go open the door.’” The doorbell rang and she blinked quickly. “Again?”

“Yeah. This is the last part, I promise.”

“If it’s a stripper, I’ll love you for life.”

He laughed loudly. “Are you sure that’s what you want?”

“Definitely. I’m absolutely positive I want a stripper for my birthday.”

“Well, open the door and see.”

She jerked the door open once again, focusing first on the sight of Tyler running around the corner and disappearing into the night, what looked like a telephone clenched in his left hand. A quiet cough jerked her attention to the figure standing on the porch, her mouth dropping open in surprise when he stepped forward to lean against the doorjamb, a plastic bag dangling from the same hand that held what appeared to be videos.

The balloons flew freely to the ceiling, the phone fell from her shoulder and he couldn’t hold back his grin. “I’m not exactly the stripping type, Boof, but I can give it a shot if you really want me to.”

Her shock immediately melted into a bright smile. “Maybe later.” The words were barely out before she laughed and practically jumped into his arms. “How’d you get here?”

“On a plane.” He chuckled at her exasperated sigh, then tightened his hold around her, lifting her off the ground as he stood up straight.

“Okay, this is ridiculous.” She clung to him and stretched her toes toward the ground. “You’re officially too tall for me, Josh. I don’t even reach your shoulder anymore. Did you really have to go and grow like that? Your mom must be having a fit.”

“Only a little bit of one. Most of my shirts are still long enough.” With a grin, he leaned forward until her feet could touch down. “All my parts on today’s show were recorded, so I didn’t have to be there for airing. I got on an early flight this morning and Mom picked me up from the airport around noon.” Pulling back just a little, his eyes met hers. “I had to leave before your graduation, and I couldn’t come home for my birthday. There’s no way I’d miss your eighteenth, Jen. That’s a big one.” He checked his watch quickly. “We’ve got about three hours left to party. We’d better make it good.”

“Party?” Her eyebrow arched at him. “Isn’t it a little late for a party?”

“Not if it’s just the two of us. I’ve got ice cream to go with that cake and a few of your favorite movies. We can put your bracelet together and just … talk.” Stepping away, he let a small smile curve his lips. “I miss those nights when we’d stay up until two or three just talking about nothing.” His brow furrowed. “It feels like I haven’t gotten to talk to you at all this summer.”

“Uh huh.” She nodded, turning quickly so he wouldn’t see her flinch, then followed him through the hall and into the kitchen, where he put the bag and videos on the table. “It’s been a while, hasn’t it?”

“Yeah. I figured we could just kick back and relax tonight, then we’ll do some major partying tomorrow.” A grin carried on his tone. “I’ve got the whole day planned.”

“I … Josh, I can’t tomorrow.” Her face fell in disappointment. “I’ll be working until seven …”

“I’ve got it covered. Your mom called and told your boss that you had a last-minute family thing going on this weekend and you couldn’t miss it. You’re off the hook until Monday. Or whenever your next day is.” He looked up from where he was working the lid off the ice cream, meeting her unsure expression. “I know I probably shouldn’t have done it, but I just don’t get very many chances to do things like this. I wanted some time with you and I’ve only got until Sunday afternoon to fit it in. Call me selfish if you want.”

“That’s not selfish. That’s sweet. This whole thing is sweet.” She tilted her head, laughing lightly. “I’d even go so far as to say that you’re sweet.”

“Yeah. Thanks.” His cheeks turned pink. “Every guy wants to hear that he’s sweet.”

“Well, you are.” When the corner of his mouth kicked up in a smile, her heart stuttered in her chest. Don’t get caught up in his smile, Jen. You can’t have him. Remember how miserable you’ve been? You’re the worst thing that could’ve happened and you’re still not over it. Taking a deep breath to steady herself, she forced out the only question that could put a damper on any lingering thoughts of him. “How’s Andrea been?”

“Andrea?” He shook his head at the lightning-fast change of conversation. “She’s all right, I guess. Nothing different, other than maybe getting a little too clingy. I’m not that crazy about how she tries to hang all over me.” Looking back down at the lid as it finally came free of the container, he brought his thumb up to his mouth, catching the cold smudge of ice cream with his tongue. “Man, that’s good. How about we dig into this stuff before the ice cream gets all gooey?”

“Heaven forbid the ice cream be gooey.” Her grin was mirrored in the kitchen window as she turned to the counter, pulling two plates out of the cabinet and fishing forks from the drawer by the sink before coming back to the table and picking up the spatula from the cake pan. “How big of a piece do you want?”

Forty-five minutes later, they’d polished off nearly a third of the cake and half the ice cream, the dishes had been dropped in the sink and Ghostbusters 2 was playing in the background, the sound turned down, as they worked through the balloon strings, removing the pieces that would make up her bracelet.

“You’re right.” Her eyes moved over the small silver shapes that were scattered over the coffee table. “Some of these are obvious, but the others … I don’t have a clue what they’re supposed to mean.” She picked up the silver chain link bracelet. “Is this all of them?”

“Yeah, that’s it.” He shifted closer to the table, using his fingertip to arrange the charms into a specific order. “Okay, this one goes first.” The little J was passed to her, his eyebrow arching. “If it’s not a no-brainer, then this is gonna take a while.”

“I’m a J. Cool.” She laughed, fixing the tiny letter to the first link in the chain. “What’s next?”

“The piano. Again, it’s obvious.” The charm was passed to her and he moved quickly to the next one, talking as she worked with the bracelet. “This one’s a star. I remember when we used to lay out in our backyards and watch the stars come out. You’d always make a wish …”

“And it always drove you nuts when I wouldn’t tell you what I wished for.” Her eyes lit up with her grin as she fastened it on the next link. “I just kept telling you it wouldn’t come true if I said it out loud. Wow, I’d forgotten all about that.”

“We don’t do that anymore, but don’t stop wishing. With or without stars.”

“I haven’t.”

“Good.” He held up the next charm. “A treble clef. I think it’s awesome that you’re focusing on something you’ve loved for so long. I know you’re going to be one of the best composer-songwriters in the business.”

“That’s the plan, anyway.” She chewed on her bottom lip. “I just hope I’m not setting myself up to crash and burn.”

“I don’t think you are. Keep your mind on it and you’ll be amazing.” A short laugh escaped as he moved on, passing the tiny Mickey Mouse head to her.

“Okay …” Her eyebrow arched at him. “My love of Disney movies?”

“No, not really.” His head shook back and forth slowly as he watched her attach the familiar shape to a link. “The Club was because of him. I guess it’s an indirect connection, but he’s kind of the first real hurdle that’s been thrown between us. That day when you were helping me pack, I was terrified that I’d get down there and it’d turn weird and we’d never be the same.”

“But it didn’t.”

His teeth worked on his lip as he continued. “I was so sure that we’d end up growing apart …”

“And we haven’t.” Brown eyes came up to meet his. Not yet, anyway.

“I know. If anything, we’re closer than ever.” A smile formed slowly. “In a way, I guess I should be thanking Mickey for that. To me, that charm represents the fact that nothing’s ever going to come between us. If we’ve made it this far, with the separation and all that, then we’ll make it through anything.”

“Exactly.” She nodded in agreement, tilting her head forward so that he couldn’t see how she was fighting to swallow. “Through thick and thin …”

“Friends to the end.” With a sigh, he looked down, focusing on the next shape briefly before passing it to her wordlessly.

“A feather?” Her brow furrowed in confusion. “What …”

“For your spirit. Your attitude. Your stubbornness. The smile that’s purely you. Your confidence. Your laugh. Your temper. All the things that make up the person you’ve always been.” His fingers tapped across the tabletop as his gaze moved to meet hers. “Sometimes you get frustrated and ask me why you have to be the way you are. You wish you could change one thing or another, be someone else. You don’t seem to realize that you’re absolutely perfect as is.” He paused just long enough to clear his throat. “I wouldn’t have you any other way, Jenny. Never let anybody make you feel like you need to change. You don’t. And you shouldn’t.”

Without a sound, she simply nodded, acknowledging that she’d heard him loud and clear.

“A guitar.” Knowing that she wouldn’t say anything, he moved on. “Again, no explanation needed.”

“Right.” She grinned, maneuvering the tiny instrument onto the chain and letting her eyes move over the bracelet, counting to herself. “How many more do you have over there?”

“Three. A charm for every link.” He let his finger move over the next piece before he slid it across the table to her. “A heart. Because yours is so strong, even when you let your guard down enough to let people see that you’re a softie way down deep. You try not to show it, but you really care a lot more than you’d probably like to about a lot of things.” As he spoke, her hands trembled and she fumbled with the chain, prompting him to smile. “You’ve got a vice grip on it, won’t let it go for just anyone and you try to put walls up to keep people out. But for some reason, way back when we were only little kids, you let me in.”

“I never tried to keep you out.” Working to swallow around the lump forming in her throat, she waited for him to go on.

“I know. And that’s one of the biggest gifts you could’ve ever given me. Knowing that I’ve got even a little place there …”

“You’ve got more than just a little place, Josh.” She took a deep breath. “You’re special.”

“And you should know that you’re just as special to me.” He reached across the table and wrapped his fingers around hers, seeming to wrestle with what he wanted to say next. Indecision flickered through his eyes and his forehead creased minutely, marred for only a brief second as he quickly made up his mind, visibly switching gears from his original train of thought. “You’ve got the biggest heart I’ve ever seen. Even though I know you’re … selective, sometimes I get scared that you might let the wrong person in, and you’ll get hurt when I can’t be here to fight for you.”

You mean like when I decided to give Luke the chance to tear me to shreds? Or when I thought that maybe you might want more from me? Too late, Josh. Biting her lip, she pushed the thoughts away. “You can’t be my hero every time I make a mistake or things get hard. It’s not possible.”

“I’ve finally realized that. We’re both becoming adults and you’re branching out, trying new things and meeting new people. I know I have to let you go, even if it’s only a little bit …”

“No, don’t let me go.” Her gaze came down to where their hands met. “When you left, I didn’t let you go. Just because we’re getting older doesn’t mean that we have to back away. You may not be able to fight my battles for me, but I still need you. I’m always going to need you, Josh. No matter what.”

“Me, too. I mean, you’re my girl. Nothing’s gonna change that.” He squeezed her fingers briefly, then pulled away, leaning back against the couch as his hand skimmed over the table, moving the next shape over to her. “An angel. It’s been almost five years since you lost your dad, but I know you still miss him. It’s in your eyes on special days and sometimes – when you think nobody’s watching – you zone out and concentrate on remembering him.”

“It still hurts.” She blinked, and he could see the tears she was fighting to hold back. “I’ve had such a long time to adjust, but it still kills me when I think of all the stuff he’s missed. He … he didn’t get to see me grow up, graduate high school. He won’t see me graduate college or hear any of the songs I write or walk me down the aisle if I get married. I guess you’ll have to do that, huh?” A tear slid down her cheek as she sniffled. With her gaze on her hands, she missed the stricken look that flashed in his eyes as her words sank in. “There’s so many things I want him to be here for. But he’s gone and he’s never coming back.” The charm twisted between her fingers as she looked up at him, smiling slightly through the moisture clouding her vision. “It helps that I have you, though. You remind me so much of him.”

“I … I do?” His brows lifted in surprise.

“Well, yeah.” She laughed quietly, turning her attention back to the silver angel. “You care about me. You’re protective of me. And you’re always there when I need you. Just like he was.” Her head tilted to the side as she studied the smooth lines etched into the shiny wings, the tears spilling over in earnest when she realized her thumb was moving over her father’s initials. “You give me support in everything I do, no matter how stupid or ridiculous it may be to everybody else. When I think something’s impossible, you know exactly what to say to make me try that much harder. Then, if it turns out that I screw everything up, you do whatever you can to make the fall easier.”

Silence settled as one trembling hand came up to wipe the wetness from her cheeks, then reached out for the bracelet, trying her best to attach the charm onto a link despite her shaking fingers.

After watching her struggle for a moment, he cleared his throat and leaned forward to take the silver pieces from her, quickly working the metal rings together as he spoke softly. “You’re giving me a little too much credit, don’t you think? It’s not like this is one-sided, Boof. You do the exact same things for me.”

“We’re still a little unbalanced, though.” Closing her eyes, she breathed deeply, taking a minute to get herself under control. “Because sometimes it feels like he’s able to see everything I’m doing through you. And that just makes me want even more to make you both proud.”

“You always have. There’s no way you could ever disappoint me. Or him.” His finger traced a circle around the last charm slowly before he picked it up, fastening it to the last open link on the chain. Once again, he paused, mulling over his explanation for several minutes. With a sigh, his shoulders lowered slightly as he looked up at her, a smile curving his lips once again. “This last one is another J. I had a hard time picking out what I should finish up with, but I finally decided that no matter how many things about you I could find a shape for, the best part was that it would always begin and end with you.”

“Wow.” She stared at him, astonished and fumbling for words. “Josh, I …”

“When you gave me my necklace, you said it was because you wanted to give me something that represented what you saw in me.” He held out his arm, the silver beads resting just below the base of his hand catching the overhead light. “And you gave me this bracelet so that I’d remember you while I was gone. It’s made all the difference for me, so I wanted to do something like that for you.” Reaching out, he gestured for her to lift her wrist so that he could clasp the chain in place. “These charms represent you, the amazing friend you’ve always been to me and what we’ve had to go through to keep that friendship. And no matter where I go or what I end up doing, I swear that there’ll never be a day that I won’t take time to remember you.”

“Josh.” She shook her head slowly. “You can’t promise me that …”

“Have I ever made you a promise that I didn’t try my absolute best to keep?”

“But …”

He looked up from straightening the bracelet on her wrist, his eyebrow arched sharply. “Have I?”

Her shoulders heaved in a sigh. “No.”

“Well, I’m not about to start now.”

“I wasn’t trying to say that you were.” She chewed on her lip and stared at him. “It’s just … you have no idea where you’re going to be in two months, let alone a year or two down the road.”

“I know exactly where I’ll be. Right here.” He smiled when her eyes narrowed on him. “This is the last season, Jen.”

“What?”

“They’re canceling the show.”

“What?” Her jaw dropped in shock. “Can they do that? I mean, didn’t you guys sign contracts and all that?”

“Our contracts state that we’ll be employed as long as the network sees fit to carry on the show. They didn’t set a specific time span.” His shoulders shrugged in an attempt at indifference, but the effort fell just short. “The ratings aren’t nearly as high as they were two seasons ago, so they’re moving on to different ideas.”

“Wow. That’s rough.” She fell silent, searching for the right thing to say. When the words refused to come, she scooted across the carpet until she was seated beside him, letting her arm slide around his waist, her head tilting until it rested against his shoulder, giving him the best half-hug she could while they were on the floor. “I’m sorry, Josh.”

“Hey, it’s all right. I never thought it’d last forever, you know?” His arm moved, going around her and giving her a squeeze, pulling her closer to him as he returned her embrace. “It’s kind of a win-win situation for me, anyway. On one hand, I love doing the show, but on the other, I’ll get to be back here with my family.”

A smile curved her lips, knowing that he was including her in that statement. “Were the ratings their only reason?”

“It was their main reason, but there were others that factored in. We’re all getting older, the fans are growing up and there are newer things out there to grab the kids’ interest. After what happened to Kids Incorporated last year, I think we all knew it was just a matter of time before they pulled the plug on us, too.”

“Did they give you any kind of time frame? They’re not just going to yank it off the air with no warning, are they?”

“No, they won’t let it just disappear.” He cleared his throat, shifting until they were more comfortable against each other. “We’ll finish up the year as usual, taking a break for the holidays, then they’ll bring us back in January to go ahead and tape all the spring shows. Taping will be finished by February or March and they’ll use re-runs as filler through the season, like they always do. Then they’ll air a special finale show in May or June, on the day the regular season would be ending.”

“And that’s it?”

“That’s it. I’ll be home by the end of March at the latest.” His chest rose as he inhaled calmly. “I’ve had a blast with it, and I’ll miss the performing and the people …”

“Even Justin?” She smiled mischievously up at him.

“Yeah, even Justin.” He chuckled under his breath. “He might be a pain sometimes, but he’s really a great kid. Lots of opportunities are gonna open up for him. I know it.”

“You’ll have opportunities, too, Josh. Maybe not right away, but they’ll come along. With the popularity the show had, the CD you guys released and the promo and tour and stuff, they can’t overlook you for too long.” Twisting, she reached until she could wrap her free arm around his neck, bringing him into a more secure hug. “There’s still a lot of amazing things left for you out there. You just have to be patient until the offers start coming in.”

“Thanks, Jen.” His features lifted in a smile as she gradually loosened her hold on him and he watched the overhead lights glitter off the silver around her wrist before shifting his gaze over to the television, where the credits from the movie were crawling over the screen. “Hey, this wasn’t supposed to be a pity party. It’s your birthday. And there’s a copy of Pretty In Pink around here somewhere.” She pulled away from him completely and he stretched his arms over his head, sending her a questioning look. “You up for it?”

“For Pretty In Pink? Do you even have to ask?” Her own bright grin formed, just before she leaned over and kissed his cheek. “You’re the only guy I know who’s willing to sit and watch eighties chick flicks with me.” She snickered, pushing herself up until she could slide onto the comfortable couch cushions, then reached out to ruffle his hair as he moved to stand. “You know that makes you just about perfect, right?”

“Not perfect. Insane.” He shook his head as he pushed the new video into the VCR and hit play. “I wouldn’t watch this with anyone but you, Boof.” On his way back to the couch, he noticed her yawning and reached out to flip the light switch, leaving the room dimly lit by a single corner lamp and the television. “Besides, in some weird, girl-next-door, skinny-redhead kind of way, Molly Ringwald might actually be almost hot.”

Without even looking at her, he knew that her eyes were widening, watching him as he calmly settled down on the cushion next to her and rested his arm over the back of the chair. Just as he expected, it didn’t take more than a minute for her to completely lose it, her hysterical laughter flying through the darkness, drowning out the old previews on the video, until she was reduced to clutching her sides as she tried to catch her breath. Shaking his head with a smile, he let out a quiet laugh and moved his arm down, draping it over her shoulders to pull her until she was against his side.

The happy smile never left her face as she turned her head to look at him. He didn’t meet her gaze, but she knew he could feel her watching him, certain of it when she felt his arm tighten around her as the opening scenes of the movie began to flash across the screen. She automatically relaxed, settling into him as she always did and turned her full attention to the movie.

When he leaned down to kiss her forehead, his fingers beginning to comb through her hair, she simply let her head rest against his chest, neither of them giving it a second thought as the story of Andie and Duckie played out before them.

----------------------------------------

April 18, 1995

“Stop hogging all the popcorn.”

“Then pass over the chips.”

Food was quickly exchanged before they settled back down on the couch.

“I’m going to miss this.” She sighed, relaxing back against the cushions. “You just got to come home and now I’ve got to leave in less than a month.”

“Well, UCF can’t exactly come up here to you, so you’ve got to go to it.”

“But …”

“Jen, it’s the best school you could’ve chosen. You blew them away with your auditions and they gave you a full ride. You’ve worked your tail off for this, and you can’t back out now.”

“I know, but …”

“No buts. Don’t let me be something that makes you doubt yourself.”

“It’s not just you, Josh. I mean … I don’t know anybody down there.” Her teeth worked over her bottom lip. “I’m going to be completely on my own. No family, no friends. Nobody to talk to. And you know how hard it is for me to open up to people.” She sent an insecure glance his way. “It’s going to be just like when I was little, but without Mom. I’ll be totally alone.”

“Okay. I get it.” Chewing on a potato chip to mask the sting of her correction, he let his eyes slide over to meet hers. “You’re going to be fine, Jenny. Get to campus and meet your roommate. There’s no way she won’t love you.” With a brief shrug, he gave her a confident smile. “And if she doesn’t, then just call me and vent. We’ll talk every night if you want. You’ll be home on breaks, your mom and I will visit whenever we can. It’ll be great.”

“I guess.” Her voice was uncertain, but she nodded. “You’d really let me call you every night?”

“If that’s what you need, then absolutely. We’ll set a time and I promise that I’ll be here to answer.” He reached over and gave her hand a quick squeeze. “But the more you think about it, the quicker the time will seem to go. So how about we concentrate on the TV, okay?” He watched her nod again, then picked up the remote to turn up the volume on the television.

“I’d forgotten how much I love this movie.”

“Um, Boof … we’re watching Pocahontas.” Another chip made its way into his mouth. “It’s not exactly cinematic brilliance.”

“Shut up.” She threw a handful of popcorn at him. “Disney movies are the best.”

“Uh huh.” Brushing off the fluffy white kernels, he looked up with a grin. “You nearly lost it when the lion died in the last one.”

“Hey, The Lion King was a tear-jerker. You’re a guy, so you don’t get it.” A laugh escaped when a potato chip bounced off her leg to hit the floor. “Besides, Pocahontas is completely different.”

“Really?” He arched an eyebrow at her. “How?”

“Hellooo. Have you seen John Smith? He can explore my territory any day.” Her head tilted as she looked at the screen, chewing a handful of buttery popcorn, considering the rugged adventurer before finishing her thought. “Well, as long as he has Mel Gibson’s voice.”

“You’re checking out a cartoon character?” Blue eyes narrowed on her, looking for any sign of humor, but finding none. “Jen, you can’t be serious.”

“Hey, you can’t judge me.” She grinned brightly at him. “Remember that little thing you had for Jessica Rabbit?”

“Oh, man. I’d forgotten all about that.” He laughed, shaking his head. “But that was years ago. And Jessica was a fine specimen of animation. Smith is just …” His hand gestured toward the screen as he tried to come up with the right words. “Well, he’s no Jessica.”

“Maybe not, but he’d still be a good catch.”

“You think?”

The loose ponytail at the back of her neck swayed as she nodded. “Yeah, I do.”

“Okay, I’ve got to hear this.” Turning on the couch to face her, he propped an elbow on the back cushions and rested his head against his fist. “How do you figure?”

“Well, just watch him. He’s an adventurer, so he’s not afraid to try new things. He’s in control and can handle rough situations. He’s a quick thinker.” She pointed at the television. “See? He knew that he’d said something stupid, but he also knew exactly what to say and do to calm her down and get her to stay.”

“It’s scripted. Of course he knew what to say.”

“But it’s still part of his character. He stands up for what he knows is right, even if it’s not the popular thing. He’s not stuck on himself, even though the other sailor guys give him plenty of opportunities to be. The only personal gain he gets from the trip is being able to explore new land.” Her brow knit in thought as she stared at the wall above the television. “He’s loyal, willing to give himself up so the kid who shoots the Indian can go free, then risks his life so her dad doesn’t get killed. His comfort zone is next to nothing, so it’s not a stretch for him to be attracted to her. He’s completely open to anything she throws at him, because he’s fascinated with how she views things. They couldn’t be more different from each other, but he doesn’t really care about that … he just cares about her. And he’s not afraid to admit how she changed his life for the better.”

He just watched her as she went silent, a soft smile lifting the corners of his mouth as a slightly dreamy expression came to her face. Without a second thought, he let out an exaggerated sigh and pitched his voice into a girlish tone. “Can we talk about his voice now?”

She looked over to find him fluttering his eyelashes, the heavy exhalation lifting his shoulders, and couldn’t keep herself from laughing. “Enough chick talk, huh?”

A dark eyebrow arched as he nodded forcefully. “Um, yeah.”

“Hey, you asked.”

“I didn’t know you were going to wax girly with it, or I wouldn’t have.” He sent her an evil grin as she rolled her eyes. “You know, maybe you and Justin could have made it work. He’s got a thing for animation, too.”

“There’s a difference. I don’t do anime.” She wrinkled her nose in disgust before reaching for a handful of chips. “That stuff’s freaky.”

“What’s so freaky about it?”

“All the anime stuff I’ve seen had something to do with weird creatures or bondage-dominatrix-ninja type women whose mouths don’t come anywhere close to matching the dialogue.”

“Bondage-dominatrix-ninja type women?” The look on his face was stunned, bringing her to laughter once again. “What kind of …” His question was cut short, the telephone ringing sharply on the table beside the couch, making them both jump in surprise, then laugh at each other’s shocked expression. After a few more shrill rings, he reached out for the cordless unit, still laughing as he checked the caller ID. “Speak of the devil.”

“Who is it?”

“Justin.”

“Ah.” She arched an eyebrow at him. “Do you want me to pause it?”

“No, that’s okay. Just don’t molest the TV and it’ll be all right.” He grinned and pressed the button to interrupt the shrilling buzz. “Hey, J.” Then he sent her a wink. “We were just talking about you. What’s up?” There was silence for a few seconds. “Wait. You’re positive? What did he say exactly?”

Her eyes followed him as he rose from the couch, dropping the chip bag onto the vacated cushions before walking away and into the kitchen, where his voice was nearly impossible for her to make out. With a shrug, she turned her attention back to the movie, sneaking a handful of the abandoned chips while she was sure he wasn’t looking.

“Okay. Sounds good.” Minutes later, he came back through the doorway, only stopping to lean against the couch. “Yeah. I’ll talk to you later and we’ll work out the details.” Blindly, he reached down, scooping some of the popcorn out of the bowl propped in her lap. “Take it easy, man.” The phone clicked as he cut off the connection. For a moment, he just stood there silently, staring at the floor and munching on the fluffy white kernels, obviously trying to work something out in his mind.

“Josh? Everything okay?”

“What?” His head jerked up, meeting her concerned stare. “Oh, yeah. Everything’s fine.” He dropped the phone on the coffee table and grabbed the remote to pause the movie. “You know how you’re going to Florida next month?”

“Uh huh.” She nodded, an eyebrow arched at the odd question. “Why?”

“What if we were down there together?”

“What?” Her jaw dropped, eyes widening as she focused on his serious expression. “You’re joking, right?”

“Nope.” A slow smile lifted his features and he crossed his arms over his chest. “Justin’s been talking to this guy – Chris – who’s gotten together with this other guy and has been working on putting together a group. I went to sing for them before I came home from the finale show.”

“You auditioned?” She grinned, leaning forward until the bowl tilted dangerously toward the floor. “And they want you?”

“They’ve extended an offer. The spot’s mine if I want it.”

“That’s … that’s fantastic!” With no regard to the white kernels scattering across the floor, she jumped up and threw herself at him, giving him only a few seconds to catch her against him. Her arms wound around his waist, his chest muffling her laughter as she began bouncing in excitement. “I told you they’d be crazy not to see what you’ve got!”

“I know you did. I just stopped believing it, I guess.” He laughed against her hair, beginning to bounce a little himself. “This could be it, Jen. This could be my big break.”

“And I get to be there with you. How cool is this?” She pulled away, looking down when she heard the popcorn crunching under her feet. “Oh, man. Your mom’s going to kill me if she finds this stuff all over her floor. Where’s your vacuum?”

“Don’t worry about it. She’ll understand.”

“Yeah, right. Sure she will.” Her gaze came back up to him. “So they want you. What happens now? Do you start working right away or what?”

“We still need to find a bass to round out the parts.” His fingers raked through his hair, the excitement building with every word he said. “I’ll probably head down in about two weeks to get settled and help look for a fifth. Once we find him, we’ll start running with it.” As his thought progressed, he grinned. “I’ll be there to help you move into your dorm.”

With a bright smile, she hugged him tightly once again. “We won’t really have to say goodbye this time.”

“Nope. Just a ‘see you later’.” He laughed. “Orlando’s not going to know what hit it once we’re both there.”

“Well, they’d better duck and cover then, because we’re coming. Whether they like it or not.”

May 7, 1995

She pulled the Tracker into a parking space, then sat there, staring up at the tall building that housed a small portion of the UCF student body. It was a solid structure, but her heart sank at the roughness of the perimeter. Basically, her new home – for the next semester, at least – had all the classic appearances of being in a less than desirable section of campus.

Okay, Mom … maybe you were right about using that college fund for housing.

A quick horn blast came as a Jeep with three guys crammed into the front and a pile of boxes stacked in the back pulled into the space next to her. When she saw who was driving, she laughed and got out to greet him. Her knuckles tapped across the hood and she sent a smile to his passengers as she made her way around to where he was hopping out to hug her. “Perfect timing, Josh. I literally just got here.”

“I see that.” He grinned and wrapped his arms around her before leaning down to kiss her cheek. “We had a little trouble trying to figure out how to get your boxes to fit in one load, so I was sure you’d be looking for us.” His eyes widened as he took in their surroundings. “Are you sure this is the right place?”

“Yep. Lake Claire Apartments.” Uneasiness colored her tone as she stepped away from him and looked back at the building. “I’m hoping it’s nicer on the inside.”

“Well, I’ve seen worse, that’s for sure.” The new voice had her turning toward the passenger side of the Jeep, where a twenty-something guy with dark hair was moving her direction, smiling as his gaze trailed quickly over the residence hall to settle on her. His grin widened as he held out a hand. “Chris. We thought you and Jace might need a little help.”

“Jen. Nice to meet you.” She shook his hand and tilted her head a bit. “I think you’re probably the one I should be thanking for getting Josh down here, aren’t you?”

“Well, I guess so …” His shrug ended abruptly when she went on her toes, her arms going around his neck, hugging him tightly. “Make that yes. A definite yes.” He returned her embrace, raising his eyebrows as he looked to JC and mouthed a silent Wow over her shoulder.

“Hey, now. It’s only fair to point out that Chris wouldn’t have even known about Jace if I hadn’t suggested him.” The younger teen spoke up next to them and Jen looked at him, taking in the way he bounced on his toes before spreading his hands out to his sides. “Does that earn a hug, too?”

“Yeah, that gets a hug, too.” She laughed at his bright grin and stepped into his arms. “It’s good to finally meet you, Justin. I’ve heard a lot about you.”

“Probably not as much as I’ve heard about you.” He chuckled under his breath at the warning glare JC sent his way. “Seriously, I feel like I’ve known you for years.”

“The feeling’s mutual.” An eyebrow arched as she leaned back to see his face. “Do I need to be worrying myself over infatuated fourteen-year-olds, or have we grown out of it?”

“Wow. Okay, that’s embarrassing.” A hand rubbed the back of his neck and a blush stained his cheeks as the others began to laugh. “Honestly, though … can you blame me?”

“You’re sweet, but there’s not much here to crush on, I’m afraid.” She laughed as she turned back to the building. “How about we figure out which piece of paradise is mine? I’ve already got the key.” Her eyes landed on the boxes in the back of the Jeep. “Maybe we should just start with my car. That stuff’s easier to carry.”

Minutes later, she had a pack on her back and a guitar case in hand as they stared at the Out of Order sign hanging on the elevator.

“Stairs it is.” Chris kicked open the door to the stairwell and held it open just long enough for her to pass through, laughing evilly as he let it swing back on Justin, who let out a yelp of protest.

With no signs for direction and limited unit numbers posted, it took a while for her to land in front of a scarred wooden door, loud music blaring on the other side. “Guess my roommate is already here.” She knocked quickly before opening the door and walking in. “Hello?” The music was so loud, her voice was swallowed up completely. “Hello!”

Sudden silence took over and a head of curly red hair appeared in one of the bedroom doorways. “Hey! Sorry, I couldn’t hear you.” She came out and carefully crossed the space that served as a living room. “You must be Jen. I’m Maggie.” A hand waved around the room. “Welcome to the seventh circle of hell.”

“Surely it’s not all that bad.” Maggie’s eyes widened at Chris’ attempt at positivity as the guys came in from the hallway. “At least you have walls.”

“Barely. Don’t ask what our neighbors do at night. I’m still trying to forget about it.” Her bright green gaze sparked with humor as she took in the group. “You’re not all planning to stay, are you? No complaints from me, but I’m fairly sure they’d kick us out over it.” A laugh escaped as she studied Justin. “Especially if we’re harboring jailbait.”

“Nope, we’re just here to help Jenny get settled. We’ll take the boy wonder with us as we go.” JC set a duffel down on the couch and looked around the room, his brow furrowing at the random pieces of duct tape covering various portions of the floor as he made quick introductions. “I’m JC and this is Chris and Justin. What’s up with all the tape?”

“I took the liberty of marking the mine field.” She pressed the toe of her sneaker down on a silver square and a hole immediately appeared. “If there’s tape, there’s already a hole. If there’s a rug, there’s a hole in the near future. If the switch is taped down, don’t turn it on, ’cuz something might catch fire.” A weary sigh moved her shoulders. “The university is remodeling all of their dorms, but they’re only working on half the buildings in the Lake Claire section right now. Once they finish the first phase, they’ll swap out these units, but demo isn’t scheduled to be completed until sometime next year.” Looking around in frustration, her hand gestured around the apartment again. “Some folks were lucky and got moved into Tower Apartments, but those units filled up pretty quick. Which means this is the only housing available for the summer term. Oh, and we’re about twenty units down on the maintenance list to see why the fridge spits at me every time I open the door.”

“Fantastic.” Jen’s eyes widened, taking in the kitchen area as she set her guitar down beside the couch. “Does anything work?”

“One of the burners on the stove gives off heat. The microwave works as long as the lights are off, which really doesn’t matter, since half the lights don’t have power.” Maggie’s foot tapped as she concentrated. “Oh, and the A/C works, as long as you don’t mind having a lake in the middle of the bathroom.”

“Okay.” Her mind racing, Jen walked cautiously over to look through the doorway of what would be her bedroom and grimaced at the way the ceiling sagged over the foot of the bed. “Okay. Guys, I hate to be a pain, but I think what’s made it up here is all that we’re moving today. Josh, do you mind hanging on to those boxes for a little while longer?”

“Sure thing.” He stepped to the side and looked up when something wet hit his cheek. “Are you sure you don’t want to come back with us? Lance won’t be in until next week and even then, there’s an extra bedroom. We’ve got space for both of you until you can work something out.”

“I think I can handle it for one night.” She looked over to the redhead, who was casting a worried glance toward the ceiling, which suddenly had a suspiciously wet look. “What do you think, Maggie? Can you suck it up for another twenty-four hours? Or at least until I can get over to Administration tomorrow?”

“If I survived last night, I think I can make it for another …” As she was speaking, the ceiling began a slow tear and descent, wet plaster coming down in large sheets to expose the beams above. A piece came loose, and Jen hopped to a designated safe place to avoid the mess, only to have her foot go straight through the floorboards, the wood digging into her ankle and sending her sprawling into Justin’s arms.

“Well, what do you know? Looks like I caught you anyway.” Justin laughed and held her upright, keeping her from going further into the floor.

“We’ve talked about this … you couldn’t handle her, kid.” JC knelt and grasped her calf, trying to work her foot from the damaged boards without sacrificing her shoe. She cringed as he wrenched her free, leaning against the couch cautiously as he tested her ankle with gentle fingers. “You okay, Boof?” At her nod, he looked over to the others. “All right. Chris, how about you and J help Maggie get her stuff packed up and I’ll start getting Jenny moved back down?”

“Yep.” Chris was already moving, grabbing an empty box on his way to the bedroom Maggie had exited earlier. “Sorry, ladies. Nobody’s staying here tonight.” He looked back as more of the plaster fell free from the ceiling, landing in a wet pile. “Or anytime soon, I’d say. It looks like that leak’s been going for a while.”

“Hey, Jen?”

She looked up from where JC was pulling splinters from her skin, smiling at her roommate’s relieved expression. “Yeah?”

“Do hunky heroes follow you around everywhere you go, or is it just my lucky day?” Maggie fanned herself dramatically and laughed as Justin passed by her, then winked before grabbing a box and following them into the bedroom.

“Hear that? You’re a hunky hero.” JC laughed and released her as she grinned down at him, her fingers ruffling his hair. “I guess it’s my lucky day, too.”

*********************

Two days later, Jen was already awake and pulling ingredients out of the refrigerator when Chris came down the stairs and into the kitchen. She was humming and swaying to the music coming from the radio on the counter as she put eggs, shredded cheese, peppers and an onion next to the stove, the blue and green shirt tied around her waist swinging as she turned around.

He watched her for a minute, smiling at the picture she made, before clearing his throat. “Singing and dancing before eight in the morning? You’re really not human, are you?”

“Morning, Chris.” She laughed as he leaned against the fridge. “You’re just in time to help with breakfast. Grab a knife and get to dicing.”

“Peppers?” His brow arched as he opened a drawer and pulled out a butcher knife. “What exactly are we making?”

“Breakfast casserole.” Reaching into a lower cabinet, she took out a baking dish and two large bowls. “Dice the peppers like I showed you yesterday, but we only need about a quarter of the onion.”

“You just fixed us dinner last night and you already want to feed us breakfast?” A soft chuckle escaped as he worked over the peppers. “Exactly where did Jace find you? And are there more of you? Maybe a few years older?”

“Correction: I showed you guys how to fix an easy taco salad. Now, I’m teaching you how to make a ridiculously simple breakfast casserole. Seriously, you boys can’t survive on pizza and take out three meals a day.” She patted his shoulder on her way to open the freezer and pulled out a bag of hash browns. “Josh found me on a playground in the first grade … you know, way back when he was too young to realize how hard it would be to get rid of me. And Lord help us all if there’s more than one of me. The universe wouldn’t survive.”

“Yeah, that’s a shame. And as excited as he was about you coming here, I don’t think getting rid of you has ever crossed his mind. The guy hasn’t talked about much else for the last week.” He finished the peppers and left them in a pile, reaching for the onion. “What time is your mom coming over?”

“She and Lynn were planning to be here around nine.” Her glance flicked over to the clock above the microwave as she opened the refrigerator again. “Just in time to eat with us.” Leaning down, she dug through the meat drawer. “We didn’t think to pick up any ham. Sausage okay?”

“The majority of this house is male, kid. If it’s edible, it’s okay.” Within minutes, she had the sausage browning and had instructed him on the preparation of the other ingredients. “I hate that your dorm fell through – like, literally – but I’m really glad that everything seems to be working out. Your mom was already planning to come down and between the house and the apartment Lynn is renting, we had enough room that nobody wound up in a hotel. Did Maggie get her housing fees back?”

“Yeah, the folks over at Administration really had no idea of the shape those units are in. We both got a full refund, since my scholarship doesn’t cover summer terms. The rest we’ll have to work out after we find a place. Mom didn’t seem too worried while we were looking through the ads last night, so I’m not freaking out just yet. She keeps reminding me about my college fund, and I’m hoping it’ll give me some time to find a job.” Deciding the sausage was done, she lifted it from the stove. “Okay, drain the grease and mix the sausage in with your potatoes, veggies and cheese, then dump it in the pan and pour the eggs over the top. Add a little more cheese, then bake at 350 for about half an hour and you’ve got breakfast.”

“You weren’t kidding. That was really easy.” He slid the pan into the oven, set the timer, then headed for the sink.

“Just you wait. Tonight, we’re doing chili.” When he began to turn on the water to do the dishes, she stopped him. “Best part is, we cooked, so they get to clean.” With a laugh at his gleeful expression, she turned to the coffee maker. “I don’t drink it, but I know Josh does. Do you do coffee?”

“Not usually. Jace and Joey are the ones who need the boost in the morning.” He shook his head. “The kid has tried it a few times, but he hasn’t acquired the taste for it yet. Lynn usually grabs a cup, though.” As she added water and turned on the machine, he hopped up on one of the bar stools and picked up the leather book laying on the counter. “What’s this?”

She glanced over at him. “Oh, that’s my journal. I’d just finished a little writing when you came in.”

“Journal, huh?” His brows arched as his fingers flipped along the pages. “As in, you’ll get upset if I take a look?”

“Is there a purple dot on it?”

He turned it over, checking the binding. “Nope.”

“Then go right ahead.” Moving to a stool across from him, she smiled. “It’s really just a bunch of randomness. Thoughts, poems, lyrics … I don’t think there are any full songs in that one, but I’ve got a whole box of them with me. I started writing stuff down when my Dad died. You know, for therapy.” Her fingers played with the napkin holder as she watched him read. “I was never able to really open up and talk to anybody but Josh, and I was going through some pretty heavy stuff for a thirteen-year-old. He started getting me these leather books when he first moved down here for the show. By now, I’m pretty sure he’s figured out how to get them in bulk.”

“That’s rough. I’m sorry, Jen.” He paused on what she’d been working on that morning, lyrics scribbled down the center of one of the pages:

Here and now
Is the way I live
Unafraid of what life gives

And there’ve been times in my life
I couldn’t see a difference
In pain or in joy, or in sun or in rain
They just seemed the same

But I’m only human
Branded by ambition
But I’m going to make it count

“Hey, this is really good.” Closing the book, he handed it back to her. “When you’re done with it, can I see the whole thing?”

“Sure. An objective eye before I actually have to start handing stuff over to an instructor would be great.” She smiled and traced a finger over the initial burned in the cover. “My summer courses are really just getting a few of the credits that didn’t transfer out of the way. I’m nervous about going into fall term and having somebody else rip my work to shreds. Mom and Josh aren’t exactly the most critical of me, if you know what I mean.”

“I’ll look over anything you want to show me, Jen. I’ll even listen if you need me to.” An upbeat song came on the radio and he slid off the stool and came around to her, taking her hand and pulling her to stand with him. “But for now, we dance.”

Laughing, she let him spin her and began singing with him as he twirled her around the kitchen. “’Cuz when you worry, your face will frown, and that will bring everybody down. So don’t worry, be happy.”

By the next verse, Joey and Maggie had joined them, dancing and singing as the smell of freshly brewed coffee began to bring the house to life.

The song changed and Jen found her sock-covered feet sliding across the floor to where JC and Justin were coming down the stairs, watching in amusement. JC caught her before she could fall, and she grinned up at him. “Morning. Care to join us? Breakfast will be ready in a little bit.”

“Kitchen dancing seems to be your thing, huh?” He straightened her up, then spun her again, laughing when she stumbled back against his chest. “Let’s see if we can keep you off the floor this time.” Justin moved past them and took Maggie from Joey, who poured a cup of coffee and claimed a stool next to Chris.

She shook her head as he began dancing her across the room. “I seem to remember that it was your fault I wound up on the floor the last time. And you weren’t exactly my dance partner then, either.”

“Doesn’t matter. Only difference is location and we have friends with us this time.” He pulled her close to avoid a spinning Maggie and began to sing. “Slipping and sliding all along the waterfall with you, my brown-eyed girl. You, my brown-eyed girl.”

The song was still going when Lynn and Lisa arrived, and Jen heard the stove timer go off as JC twirled her again. “Chris, that’s your signal. Perfect timing, ladies. Coffee’s in the pot and breakfast is served.”

*********************

“Shouldn’t we be starting with the rentals we talked about?” Confusion lifted her tone as Jen watched Lisa steer the car off University Drive and into a subdivision. “I mean, this is a really convenient area, but isn’t this where the house that was for sale is?”

“Yep. The agent is meeting us in about twenty minutes for a showing.” Lisa glanced over at her daughter, amusement flashing across her features. “Is that okay with you?”

“I guess, but how am I going to afford payments on a house? Between Maggie and myself, we could handle at least the smaller of the rentals, even if it is on the other side of town.”

“You really do have selective hearing, don’t you?” Lisa sighed in exasperation, shaking her head. “How many times have I asked you to please use at least some of your college fund?”

“But, Mom … I just didn’t want to waste it …”

“Really, Jennifer. Your father and I started that fund before you were even born.” Pulling into the driveway of a large two-story home, she put the car in park, then turned to face Jen. “Steve always wanted to make sure that his children would have the opportunity for any education they wanted. We’d planned on providing for at least two, but when it took so long for us to have you, we knew that there would be enough for you to do anything you set out to do. There was plenty enough in it before he passed, but I added to it even more with a portion of his life insurance. Then we won the lawsuit against the construction company and it grew again.” Her fingers tapped against the steering wheel as she continued. “But you turned out to be an overachiever just like him. You just had to work until you could buy your own car instead of letting me give you one – that money went into your fund, too, by the way. You got a scholarship to the community college last year, earned a full ride down here. Then you refused to take any money for your summer classes and housing.”

“Okay, well …”

“When they awarded you that scholarship, I switched gears and started thinking you would use it for your first house, or a vacation after you graduated … maybe even your wedding. Truth is, you could use it for all the above and still not need a job while you’re working on your degree.”

“Wait. What?” Brown eyes widened in surprise. “Seriously?”

“I might crunch numbers for a hospital every day, but I happen to be fairly good with investments, you know. And your tastes have never been exactly high class.” A hand gestured toward the baggy plaid shirt she wore over her T-shirt and jeans. “You’d rather wear hand-me-down flannel than any designer label I’d buy for you.”

“There’s nothing wrong with appreciating a good deal. And this was a gift.” She defended her wardrobe choice, her fingers tangling in her beloved shirt. “But … what about you? Will you be okay if all that is mine?”

“Honey, I work because I want to, not because I have to.” Lisa smiled softly as she looked blankly out the window. “Your father took very good care of us, I just wasn’t a very good stay-at-home mom. By the time you were old enough to go to school, I was beyond ready to get out of the house. Even after he passed, I only worked because I couldn’t stand being alone all day.” Her gaze flicked back over to her daughter, an eyebrow arching. “They’ve offered me early retirement at the end of this year and I’ve decided to take it. Mostly because I’d like to be free to come down whenever I want to see you, which will be often. It’d be nice if I didn’t have to stay in a hotel every time I’m here.”

Jen sat in silence, mulling over what she’d just been told as she looked over the brick house in front of her, appreciating the column details at the front door. “I can buy this house if I want it?”

“If you want it, yes.” The driver’s door opened and Lisa moved to get out. “Come on. I wanted us to get here early so that we could take a look at the property and exterior.” Jen stepped out and followed, looking down at the paved path that cut through the grass and led around to the back of the house. “I checked other listings in neighborhoods further from campus and if you like a bargain, you’re not going to find one much better than this. The agent told me that the owners are motivated to sell. They’ve been renting out the property for a few years and are leaving the area to move north. This is a university area and most of the neighbors are college students renting during term, so families aren’t likely to be their target.”

“I like the columns and the shutters.” As they moved around toward the back of the house, she took in as many details as she could, noticing the basketball goal further around back. “The garage is nice … and Josh would love the basketball court.”

“Don’t think about what Josh likes. Focus on what you like.”

“Okay … oh, I love the bay window! Do you think there’s a window seat?” She could feel herself getting excited as they came to the back yard, taking in the screened-in porch and full basketball court with surround lighting. “The privacy fencing is awesome. And the landscaping is beautiful.”

“The agent has the names of the companies the owners use for upkeep. All you have to do is set up a contract with them and they’ll take care of you.” Lisa looked through the screening of the porch, then turned and winked. “There’s a good space for entertaining out here. The furniture is in really good shape. And there’s a built-in grill, too. You’ll have to make some friends and put it to use.”

“I’m sure between myself and Maggie, we’ll have plenty of folks over.”

“Maggie?”

“Yeah. She’s great and I could see us being good friends. We’d talked about splitting rent, since we were already roommates, but if I’m buying a place, she may want to share space. With our experience so far in campus housing, I think I could offer her a better deal. Maybe just enough in rent to help with utilities and keeping the kitchen stocked.” Jen shrugged. “If she doesn’t want to, that’s fine, but it’d probably be nice not to have the place all to myself.”

“Smart girl.” Lisa smiled approvingly. “Although, realistically, if this is your choice, it’s not even fifteen minutes from where Josh is staying. Seeing the reactions of those boys to your food last night and this morning, you’re likely to have company more often than you imagine.”

“Uh huh. I was trying to teach them to cook, but I think it backfired.” They were both laughing as they came back around to the front yard, just in time to see the real estate agent’s car pulling into the driveway.

The woman gave them a friendly smile as she approached, folder and keys in hand. “Good morning, ladies.” She nodded in Lisa’s direction. “Shana Stevens. I believe I spoke to Lisa last night, but I’m showing to Jen, is that right?”

“I suppose so.” Jen gave a smile in return. “To be honest, I’m already impressed just by seeing the yard.”

“Isn’t it beautiful? A very well-maintained property. If you’ve already seen the exterior, we’ll head right in, then.” Shana led the way toward the front door and began sorting through her keys. “Of course, you know that this is a university neighborhood. All of your neighbors will be students. In fact, all of the previous tenants of this house were students as well.” Finding the key she was looking for, she unlocked the door and pushed it open. “I need to tell you that some of those tenants made additions and had remodeling done with the owner’s approval. The basketball court was installed about four years ago and a portion of the basement was renovated into a rehearsal studio the year before last.”

“Okay.” They went inside and Jen had to pause when she stepped out of the entrance hallway and first saw the details of the interior. “Oh, Mom … it’s fabulous.”

“The sellers own a construction business, so they were able to make several improvements before listing. All of the appliances were updated after the last renters vacated. New refrigerator, stove and oven. The floors and cabinets have been resurfaced, the walls retouched with fresh paint and the carpets in the bedrooms are new.” Shana reached to the side, flipping on the overhead lights to better reveal the large oak dining set that divided the space from kitchen to living room. “As you can see, some furniture is included, mostly items they found too large to move.” She cleared her throat and gestured around the open space. “The living room area is oversized and accessible from the back patio by sliding doors. There are two half baths in the living areas of the main level, along with two bonus rooms – I believe they’ve been used as office space and game rooms on separate occasions – and there are extra closet spaces on all three levels.”

“This would be a perfect spot for a piano.” Jen paced out a large carpeted corner space tucked beside the staircase, lit by a window overlooking the back yard. “I’ve always had a keyboard, but a piano … I’d love to have a piano. Maybe someday. A baby grand.” She bit her lip as she envisioned it. “I could have an area here for my guitars, too. And a bookcase for my journals and stuff to the side of the window.”

“Let’s head upstairs to the bedrooms.” The trio made their way up the stairs as the agent relayed information about the laundry room, garage and security system. “The system is ready, it just needs to be activated with the company and they’ll set up the new codes for you.” She pushed open the door to the first bedroom. “The house was originally designed as a rental property for as many as ten inhabitants. Two of the bedrooms on this level could potentially hold two full-sized beds, with an attached full bath and a sizable walk-in closet. The other two are smaller, made for a single queen-sized occupant, with a standard closet and a full bath. The main floor has one bedroom of the same design as the larger rooms up here, down the hallway off the garage entrance. The basement also has a small finished apartment – a large bedroom with a separate full bath and a living area with a kitchenette. You’ll find it divided from the studio area by a wall addition that has a set of double doors. About half of the basement is still unfinished. That area is closed off, accessible by the doors on the left side of the hallway leading away from the studio. The doors on the right side give access to large storage areas.”

Moving to the next door, Jen gasped when it opened to reveal a space filled with walnut furniture, already placed perfectly to accent the bay window. “Oh, wow.” She walked around the foot of the bed and laughed when she saw the cushioned seating at the base of the window. “I knew it would have a window seat.” Her fingers slid across the smooth wood of the dresser as she tested the softness of the cushions. “What size is the bed? It just needs a mattress and it’ll be perfect.”

“Should be a queen. This set was brought in about a year ago, but the last renters were male and didn’t find it appealing. This is one of the larger rooms, but I don’t think it’s been used in a while.”

“I’ve never had a bed that large …” Shaking her head, she sent Lisa a happy smile. “Mom, it’s perfect. I love it.” She looked around the room again, her gaze traveling to look out the window and over the back yard. “This is … it’s home. I know it.”

--------------------------------------------------

July 1995

Step, slide, step, jump, turn ...

He ticked off each move silently, his feet racing to keep up with the pounding beats that echoed around the large warehouse. Gasping for air, he threw his body into the next jump, focusing for only a second on the labored breathing that served as an undercurrent to the sliding and scraping of rubber soles against hard cement.

At the familiar key change, he dropped to his knees – jolting painfully against scorching stone – and switched his concentration to the arm movements Matt had choreographed especially for the bridge. Sixteen beats on the floor, then back to his feet for another minute of full body work before the end.

Sixty more seconds and they would have completed their first uninterrupted run through.

After weeks of repeating the same numbers over and over, he allowed himself the tiniest spark of hope that they were finally getting it.

Step, turn, kick, slide ...

“Lance! What are you doing?”

The music came to an abrupt stop and he let himself collapse heavily onto his back, doing his best to ignore the sweltering heat curling up around his skin and focus on drawing in deep breaths, making a futile attempt to get his racing pulse under control.

“We’ve been over this a thousand times! It’s turn, kick, slide and then down. I can’t dumb it down any more than that, kid.”

JC wiped the sweat from his brow, glancing over to see the younger blonde lying a few feet away, cringing against the hateful tirade being flung at him. The familiar bass voice growled in a soft groan and he grimaced in misery before his hands covered his face and muffled what could have been an apology.

“Get up. We’ve got work to do.”

Muted groans rose in almost comical harmony and blue eyes swept the area around the makeshift dance floor, confirming that all of them were on the ground, chests heaving as they gasped for breath, too weary to even sit up, let alone start the high energy routine over again. His eyelids sank closed, his body throbbing in time with his heartbeat.

“Come on. Get your lazy asses up.”

“Give it a rest, Matt.” The angry voice came from just inside the door, growing louder as it moved closer to the group. “What are you doing to them? And why are they doing it here? This isn’t a practice space, it’s an oversized oven.”

“We lost the space we were using, so this is what we’ve got.” Even being in his late twenties, the choreographer was wary of the young brunette with the fiery temper. Matt eyed her cautiously as she approached quickly, a lioness ready to protect her cubs, none of which had moved an inch since she’d walked in. “It’s not all that hot in here …”

“Says the one who’s only standing around yelling at them. If you’ve been working them this hard all morning, they’re lucky to still be breathing, and you know it.” There was a heavy thud as something was set down next to him and JC breathed deeply, catching the faint scent of berries and cream. He blinked quickly, taking sporadic peeks at a worried brown gaze, her brow wrinkled with concern as she pulled a wet cloth from the large cooler she’d brought and pressed it lightly to his face. “Josh? You okay?”

At first touch, the cold against his cheek stung, then his pulse began to slow as the chill became heaven, the cool soaking up the heat as it moved over his forehead. He reached up, covering her hand with his until she let go, leaving him to hold the cloth himself, eyes still closed as he managed what he hoped was a small smile. “Yeah, I’m good. Thanks.”

“Drink something as soon as you feel up to it.” He could feel her stare on him as she set an ice-cold bottle on the cement next to his arm, then she turned to growl at the choreographer. “They’re nearly dehydrated and exhausted. Were you going to work them until they all dropped from heat stroke?”

“If that’s what it takes.”

“Figures. Idiot.” The words were mumbled under her breath, and if he’d had the energy, he’d have laughed. As it was, it took all his concentration just to follow their conversation. Ice rattled together and he forced his eyelids up when he felt her move away, shifting over until she could reach first Justin, then Joey. “They need a break, Matt. Give them an hour to ...”

“Not happening. Mr. Pearlman wants this set presentable by Friday and they’ve still got a lot of work to do.”

“Like I give a damn what Lou wants.” Her voice rose dangerously as she moved on to Lance, squeezing his shoulder gently as she pressed fabric against his cheek, earning a small smile as his eyes opened. “He’s a snake, and right now, I don’t think much better of you.” Matt opened his mouth to respond, but she cut him off quickly. “It’s 110 degrees outside and you’ve had them dancing nonstop for five hours in a metal warehouse with no air conditioning and apparently no running water ...”

“It’s all we’ve got to work with. If they’d get it together, it wouldn’t be this bad.” Slumped shoulders rose in a weary sigh as his gaze shifted to glare at Lance. “I don’t like it any more than you do, but there’s nowhere else for us to go and I can’t just kick out the slackers.”

“Oh, I know exactly where you can go.” She growled, eyes narrowing as she sent him a quick glare. “They need time to rest. Isn’t it time for you to have lunch or something?” Kneeling beside Chris, she immediately ran her fingertips over his nearly dry forehead. “Chris? You’ve gotta drink something for me, okay?”

When he didn’t respond, she took the last cloth from the cooler and began wiping his forehead. “Chris? Are you all right?” Worried, she grabbed his shoulders, pulling him up and shaking him until he began to come around. “Come on, Spazz. Help me out here.” She propped him against her upper body and dipped the cloth back into the melting ice, streams of cold water running down his forehead as she doused his hair.

He groaned when the water began soaking into his shirt. “Jeez, Jen. You didn’t have to give me a bath in it.”

“Shut up. Are you okay?”

“Yeah, I’m cool.” His hand trembled as he pulled a Gatorade from the bottom of the cooler. “This looks like heaven right now, though. Thanks.”

When he sat up away from her, she looked around the weary group, then back to Matt. “If you think you’re going to get anything else from them right now, you’re crazy.”

“All right, take an hour. Be ready to get back to this after lunch.” Matt glared at the five who still hadn’t moved from the ground, grabbing up his bag when his stare landed on the only one having trouble. Shaking his head, he spun on his heel, rolling his eyes sharply as he stalked to the door. “If you’re not ready to get it right, then I don’t want to see you.” He pushed his way outside, the force of the door slamming behind him increasing her temper.

She stared at the metal door, her breath speeding up in lividity as she looked back to JC. “How long have you guys been working out here?”

“About three weeks. Today’s not as bad as it was last Tuesday.” Joey’s voice was muffled by the cloth still covering his face. “It literally hurt to breathe once it hit 115.”

“That’s not rehearsing. It’s cruel and unusual punishment.” Shaking her head, she jumped up and jogged for the door, determined to catch the choreographer before he left the parking lot. Pushing out into the hot summer sun, she found him putting his bag into the backseat of his car. “Matt, listen …”

“I’ve got no choice here, Jen. Do you think I like putting them through that?” He sighed and leaned against the driver’s side door, his haggard expression making him appear far older. “If I had a kid and knew somebody was running him through the wringer like this, I’d be out for blood. But we really have nowhere else to go.”

“Not true.” She reached into her pocket and pulled out a receipt. “Do you have a pen?”

“Yeah, sure.” Confused, he fished through his bag until he could pass her a pencil. “What are you doing?”

“If I’d known about all this …” Her hand waved to indicate the building behind her before writing her address on the white square. “I’d never have let you all work here. My basement is a studio space. There’s a floor and mirrors down there, it’s air conditioned and has all the facilities you need. There’s even some padded mats if you need them. Give them two hours to rest, and it’s all yours. The fridge will be stocked before you get there.”

“Seriously?” Matt blinked in surprise as she handed him the address and pencil. “But, Lou …”

“I really despise that man.” She shook her head in disgust. “Tell him you’ve found a space that’s half the price he’s paying to rent this disaster, cash payment only. He’s all about the bottom line, so I doubt he’ll argue with you. I don’t care about the money, but I’m not going to let them kill themselves rehearsing in a furnace.”

“But aren’t you in class most of the time? Or working? How are we supposed to …”

“You’re kidding, right?” Her brows arched. “Josh and I are basically joined at the hip. He’s got his own key and comes and goes as he pleases. Each and every one of those guys knows they’re welcome anytime. And they usually show up when it’s my turn to cook.” The choreographer gave a startled laugh at her frustrated tone. “I can’t promise to feed you every day, but the basement’s yours as of right now.” An idea began to form, and her tone lifted with possibility. “And I might even be able to get some help for Lance.”

He snorted in disbelief. “Kid, you might can hand me the keys to the Taj Mahal, but even you can’t work miracles.”

“I’m not a miracle worker.” She shrugged with a smile. “I just have an awesome basement and a few friends in the dance department at school. Be at my place in two hours, take it easier on them this afternoon and I’ll see what I can do about getting him a little extra help.” Her gaze met his steadily as she held out her hand. “All without Lou’s shorts getting twisted. Deal?”

“This I gotta see.” Taking her hand with a chuckle, he gave it a firm shake. “You’ve got a deal.”

*********************

A few weeks later, Matt was thanking the heavens above that this particular group had come equipped with Jen Lawson.

“All right, guys! Looks great!” He clapped his hands as the music ended. “Lance, I’m impressed, kid. Good job.” The two dancers standing to the side of the floor smiled his direction, nodding with approval as the group left the floor and started gathering their things. “Sam and Jake, you two are a godsend. How much longer can you stick with us?”

“As long as you need us.” Sam leaned down and grabbed the bag at her feet. “This has been a blast. And if the track that Jen is working on for us sounds anything like the sample we heard, we’re definitely getting the better end of the deal.”

“Great. That’s awesome.” The choreographer went to remove the discs from the sound system and stacked them on the counter. “I’ve got other work booked for this weekend, so unless you’ve got something else scheduled, I’m guessing you might have a break for a few days. Get some rest, guys … just don’t forget what we’ve worked on. Next week, you add in the vocals.”

As he was finishing, the upper door opened, sending the aroma of something baked and cheesy floating down to them.

“Oh, God. How does she do that?” Joey groaned, his stomach growling in anticipation as they began tromping up the stairs. “I didn’t even know I was hungry.”

“Don’t you know, man? She’s got a sixth sense when it comes to you and your stomach.” With a laugh, Chris gave him a shove and sent him slamming through the doorway and sprawling on the floor.

“If you scratch my floor, you’ll be doing more than just dishes, Joe Bear.” The cool voice came from around the corner, followed immediately by the keys of the piano tinkling out a melody. “Calzones tonight, guys. Plenty for everybody, so eat up.” She paused to make a notation on the sheet music laid out in front of her. “Sam, Jake, Matt … you, too. If you’ve got no other plans, grab a plate and join us.”

“You don’t have to tell me twice.” Jake dropped his bag in the hallway and headed for the kitchen. “Thanks, Jen. You rock.”

“She’s not kidding, guys. There’s enough here for a small army.” Maggie smiled at Lance, who was pulling pitchers of drink from the fridge, and came around the counter to carry a full platter toward the table. “J, grab the other one, will you? Chris, Joey … you know where the plates and stuff are. Get to it.”

“Hey, Mags, the extra sauce is still simmering on the stove. Bowl’s on the counter. And don’t forget the pies. Bottom shelf.” Her fingers began moving over the keys again. “Just the chocolate ones, though. The strawberry ones are for the open house at the Center tomorrow.”

“How’s that going, by the way?” JC slid onto the bench next to her, picking out a higher harmony in the upper keys. “Are you liking the job?”

“I get to entertain kids three afternoons a week.” She smiled over at him. “And my boss is awesome. I’ve even gotten some responses to my ads for piano and guitar lessons. So, yeah … it’s kind of fantastic.”

“Girl, if I keep coming over here, I’m going to be in no shape for fall performances.” Sam groaned as she carried one of the pies to the table, smiling at the music filling the room. “And whatever you’re working on over there sounds awesome. Any chance we could we use that one, too? Sounds like it would be perfect for our contemporary assignment this semester.”

“You can use anything you’d like. It all goes in my portfolio, anyway.” Jen grinned over her shoulder. “But be warned … I just finished reading Wuthering Heights for my Lit class. The lyrics for this one aren’t exactly in a loving mood.”

“Doesn’t matter to me. We can choreograph to anything, as long as it sounds like that. What’ve you got?”

“Yeah, Boof.” Jen glanced over when JC lifted his fingers from the keyboard and nudged her with his shoulder. “Let’s hear it.”

A dark brow arched as she kept looking at him, her fingers automatically launching into the melody. Her eyes closed as she listened, trying to find the perfect place for the lyrics, then began to sing.

You took your coat off and stood in the rain
You were always crazy like that
And I watched from my window
Always felt I was outside looking in on you

You were always the mysterious one with
Dark eyes and careless hair
You were fashionably sensitive but too cool to care
You stood in my doorway, with nothing to say
Besides some comment on the weather

Well, in case you failed to notice
In case you failed to see
This is my heart bleeding before you 
This is me down on my knees

These foolish games are tearing me apart 
And your thoughtless words
Are breaking my heart
You’re breaking my heart

The music continued as she stopped singing. “There’s another verse, but it’s not quite done. I’m thinking some violin and a little percussion could finish out the arrangement, but I’ll have to play with it a little more once I get it to my computer.” Absolute silence met her comment and she stopped playing to look toward the table. “What?”

Every seat around her dining room table was occupied, food on every plate … and everyone was staring at her, dumbfounded.

“Okay, was it that bad? Or did I just put too much seasoning in my crust this time?”

“Jen, I’ve been in the business for a while and I’ve never heard anything like that.” Matt put his fork down beside his plate. “Have you been submitting your work at all?”

“Well, no.” She shrugged. “I don’t actually start my Music Comp class for a few more weeks. I’m just gathering everything together so I can turn it in as I build my portfolio. We’re supposed to add to it until we graduate, but I’ve already got so many …” Her hand gestured toward the shelves of journals against the wall. “All I need is to print the arrangements to sheet music and I could turn in something every week and never have to write anything new.” Her gaze landed on Sam and Jake. “Then there’s the instrumental compositions. It’s ridiculous, really.”

“Yeah, definitely don’t stop writing. I don’t know how your advisor will operate, but if they set you up with somebody to handle the legal side for you, make sure I get their information. I don’t just work for Lou, you know. I run into people looking for new material every day.” He nodded at her. “If everything you have is like that … you’re going to be big.”

“And girl, you can sing.” Maggie shook her head and pointed at her with her fork. “Sneaky, sneaky, Jen … hiding a voice like that. You knew I’d want you to audition with me, didn’t you?”

“Oh, no. I do not perform. I’ll record my demos, but that’s it.” The denial was immediate, fear flashing across her face at the thought. “I could never get up in front of people like you guys do.”

“Just what do you think your final project is supposed to be?” Jake laughed, forking a bite into his mouth. “We all have to present our work in an open showcase before a panel of professors in our field – choreographed numbers for us, performance of portfolio for you. Every senior gets assigned a date in their last semester and you’re awarded your degree based on their impressions of your program.” He took another bite. “Of course, there usually isn’t a very big turnout for those, so it’s really just the panel and whatever friends or family can make it.”

“Man, stop.” Lance nudged him with an elbow. “She just turned green.”

Everyone at the table went back to their plates, conversations picking up from where they’d been a few minutes ago, and she turned to JC, her eyes wide with panic. “Josh … I can’t. I … what am I gonna do?”

“You keep working.” He stood, pulling her up with him. “Keep playing for us. Pretend your audience is filled with friends. Maggie seems more than willing to help you. Let her.” A smile lifted his features as he brushed her hair out of her face. “Even if it means going to an audition or two.” His hands cupped her cheeks. “You’re going to be fine, Jenny. Better than fine. I promise.” He kissed her forehead and released her. “Now let’s eat. I’m starving.”

“You’re always starving.” Laughing, she followed him to the kitchen, pouring their drinks as he filled their plates from the table and pulled a stool away from the counter for her. “Thanks.”

“Okay, what’s their deal?” Sam spoke with a lowered voice as she watched the pair at the counter. “Jen says they’re friends – that you’re all friends – but … really?” Her brows arched. “Truth?”

“They’ve been best friends since the first grade and there’s a lot of water under their bridge.” Chris leaned forward to refill his glass. “There’s a lot of flirting back and forth, and it’s rare for them to go much longer than a day without seeing or talking to each other. Honestly, I think there’s something more, but if it’s there, they don’t know it yet.”

“Oh, he knows it, he’s just chicken.” Justin lifted a piece of pie to his plate. “I’ve known Jace a few years now. He’s probably the most laid-back, chill guy I’ve ever met. Before she came down for her summer semester, the only times I’d ever seen him really come alive were either on stage or when he had her on the phone. He’d talk about her all the time and I really thought she was too good to be true.” He looked over when Jen began laughing at something JC had said. “But when I met her, it totally made sense. It’s like he just sparks to life when she’s around.”

“She’s in my math class this summer and I’ve never seen her without a smile.” Jake reached for the pie. “My first impression was that she was one of the happiest, sweetest people I’d ever met. When she came and asked us for help, I actually considered asking her out. Then I saw her around him and she just … well, I don’t really stand a chance, do I?”

“Sorry, man. I had the same idea.” Joey sat back in his chair, sighing at his empty plate. “And if it looks like things cool down on that front, I call dibs.” His gaze landed on Maggie and he smiled. “Unless her housemate is interested. I’d be down with that.”

“Yeah, right.” Maggie snorted and stood from the table, gathering up empty plates. “Sorry, Joe. Nothing personal, you’re just not my type.” She glanced over toward the kitchen and smiled. “It’s going to be fun to see how they turn out, though. Glad I’ve got a front row seat.”

August, 1995

"Good afternoon!"

A hush came over the crowd of students as the instructor breezed into the classroom, dropping a stack of folders and books on her desk before turning to face her audience.

"I’m Professor Alexandra Summers and this is Music Composition I." She crossed her arms over her chest. “If you intend to major or minor in anything other than music, then you are here by mistake. If you aspire to be anything other than a lyricist, songwriter, composer or – at the very least – a performer, then you are here by mistake. If you do not know the difference between a lyricist and a songwriter ..."  Her brow arched at the class as she paused.

“Then you are here by mistake.” The class chorused behind her, some students chuckling at her humor.

“Exactly.” Professor Summers leaned back to sit on the edge of her desk with a smile. “Facts are facts: over my years of teaching, this class has achieved a forty-five percent dropout rate by the second week and a sixty-five percent dropout rate by mid-term. Of those who survive the first term, less than half return. Of those who complete the Bachelor’s program, less than two percent are successful.” Her blonde hair swayed as she turned her head to take in the young people before her. “This class and this program are designed to bring out the absolute best in those who have the drive to succeed. But only those with the grit to work hard will get there.”

A twitter passed through the students as they fidgeted and looked among themselves, then the focus turned back to the head of the class.

“It’s one thing to have a dream. It’s another to achieve it.” The professor nodded as she continued. “On the same token, it’s one thing to aspire to greatness. It’s another to possess the talent that obtains it. Most of you have probably been scribbling poems and lyrics, strumming or tinkling out tunes for years. Your parents and your friends have convinced you that you have what it takes. That’s all well and good. However, the goal of this four-year track is to establish a well-rounded and distinguished portfolio. Ideally, that portfolio will include instrumental compositions, songs with full arrangements and standard lyrical submissions.”

“The doors of this classroom will be open three times a week, to allow you to submit works for consideration. You may also present work to me at my office. My hours and contact information are in the packet you’ll receive as we dismiss. Outside of this classroom, I expect you to spend hours upon hours fine-tuning your work – this is a perfectionist’s field, people. If you are striving for less, drop this class today.”

“As demos are required to accompany your arrangements, you will be expected to log enormous amounts of time in the music labs – the recording technicians will become your best friends. Get to know them, and quickly. They are your assets. Some of you will prefer not to provide your own vocals on your demos. If that is your circumstance, I suggest you make nice with the folks over in the Vocal department – they’re willing to provide voices, and most are easily directed.” She cleared her throat and took a drink from the mug on the corner of the desk. “Keep in mind that you will be required to perform during your final Senior showcase presentation. In order to obtain your final degree, you must vocalize at least a portion of your own work before a board of your professors. If that poses a problem for you, perhaps you should enroll in a vocal course as one of your electives.”

“For those of you who were able to purchase the software programs suggested during your class orientation, you have an advantage. And those of you already familiar with how to operate it are a lucky bunch indeed. You’ll be able to achieve far more without having to utilize the campus facilities, especially if you’re submitting an instrumental composition. Those demos may be finalized using that software and submitted without using the campus labs.”

“By each term’s end, you are required to have submitted exactly twelve completed works for my approval. You may submit as many pieces as you’d like – darken my door every day, if you must – but under no circumstances will you pass this course if you attempt to submit less than twelve. Do not fear if your work is rejected. Very rarely is a student allowed to enter all of their work into their portfolio.”

“For anyone participating in the Bachelor’s program, I will serve as your advisor. I encourage you to use me. Ask for my advice. Seek for my direction. On occasion, I encounter a student with great potential. For those who impress me, I have contacts that I am happy to utilize to their advantage.” She straightened from the desk and picked up one of the folders. “Strive to impress me. It will be to your benefit. Class dismissed.”

As the students filed out the door, she distributed packets, measuring who she would likely not see again.

“It’s wonderful to meet you, Professor Summers.” A petite brunette greeted her as she accepted the packet, a smile lighting her features. “I look forward to working with you.”

She was the only student to engage, and it was a bit of a surprise, given her gentle appearance, but upon further scrutiny, the determination was obvious behind her brown eyes. This girl had a spark, a grit to her that told of her willingness to fight for achievement. “I look forward to it as well, Miss …”

“Lawson. Jen Lawson.” With a nod, she pulled her bag up higher on her shoulder as she began to move toward the door. “I think we’re going to get to know each other very well.”

*********************

“Three?” The next day, she found herself staring at Jen across her desk as she was handed three packets of sheet music accompanied by three demo discs. “Already? When did you find the time to complete three pieces?”

“I did my research and bought the software over a year ago. It seemed like a good idea to go ahead and learn how to use it.” The girl shrugged. “I’ve been working on instrumentals for as long as I’ve been writing, so all I had to do was connect my keyboard and start playing.” A smile began to form. “I love my piano, but being able to work up the string and orchestral arrangements was fun. And streaming from my guitar is so much easier than trying to hand write all those notations.” Her brow furrowed. “I have a few other things almost ready, but I wasn’t able to make it to the labs last night, so none of these have vocals. Is that okay?”

“We’re only two days into the term, you’re already done with a quarter of the assignment and you want to know if it’s okay that they’re instrumentals?” Shaking her head, the professor sat back in her seat, studying her student intently. “You know what? Close the door and have a seat. Normally, I’d critique a demo alone and get back with advice, but let’s listen together.”

“All right.” Jen immediately pushed the door closed, pointing toward the middle packet as she sat down. “Can we start with that one? I’d really like to know what you think.”

Professor Summers placed the disc in the system beside her desk, pressed Play and sat back with her eyes closed as piano music filled the room. “Very nice.” She spoke softly. “Lovely.” After a minute and a half, the orchestration swelled to join in and she sat up, the hairs on her arms raising with the rich emotion flowing from the speakers. Too soon – but in perfect fashion – the piece ended, silence suddenly falling over them.

Her hand trembled as she removed the disc, placing it back with the sheet music for the piece. “When did you write this?”

“I started it a few years ago.” Clearing her throat, Jen looked down at her hands. “My father passed away when I was thirteen, and music was my escape so I could cope. Composing, writing lyrics and my best friend were the only things that kept me sane afterward. I wanted to write something that I could dedicate to him and while I have notebooks and journals full of material, this was the first one I finished. I call it Homeward Bound.”

“I’m sorry for your loss, Jen. But this …” Fingers tapped over the packet. “This is astounding. You’re so young. How old are you?”

“I’m about to turn nineteen.”

“Nineteen.” Wonder filled her voice as she reached for the next disc. “Can we listen further?”

“Sure.” A smile spread when she saw the selection. “I wrote this one this past spring. I was so excited to move down for school and Josh – my friend – was coming with me for an opportunity of his own. I have a few other songs with lyrics that came about at the same time, but this was just a fun session on my guitar and I love how it turned out.”

Both sat to listen as the whimsical guitar melody began to fill the room. Jen closed her eyes and began to sway with the rhythm, her fingers strumming absently against her leg as she relived the piece.

“I think I’ve heard enough.”

“Professor Summers …” Concern etched lines across her forehead. “Was it okay?”

“Jen, as long as we’re in this office, call me Alex.” She stood and came around the desk, her hands settling on the girl’s shoulders. “And it was beyond okay … these instrumentals are phenomenal. If your composition work is any indication of your lyrical work, then I’m beyond excited to see what else you submit. Make sure to go down to the lab this week and work with one of the engineers on some vocal demos. In fact, when you go in, ask for Brian and tell him that I sent you. We need to see what you’ve got as a songwriter.”

*********************

“Hey Amber … I’m late!” Jen jogged down the hallway of the community center, pausing only long enough to wave into her boss’ office and drop her guitar case by the door. “Where are they?”

“I know you are. Maggie’s got them in the viewing room, I think.” Amber made it to her door in time to see the younger girl skidding around the corner, heading for the kids’ area. “What’s going on?”

“We’ll talk later! Maggie’s gonna kill me!” As she neared the room that housed a large television and an array of bean bag chairs, she took a deep breath, trying to calm down before pushing through the door and into the darkened room. Allowing a moment for her eyes to adjust, she finally located Maggie sandwiched between two kids, fixated on Peter Pan teaching Wendy how to fly.

“How’s it going?” She whispered, kneeling behind them.

“Fine. It’s been a good day for movies. Nobody’s really in the mood for much, since school just started.” Maggie extracted herself from the chair, and the children took the opportunity to stretch out. “By the time this is over, the parents should be getting here.”

“Awesome. Sorry I’m late.”

“No problem.” The redhead shrugged, then suddenly focused. “Wait a second. You were meeting with your advisor. Did you turn in your demos? How’d it go?”

“We’ll talk about it later.” Jen’s lips twitched into a smile. “But we’re having celebration pancakes tonight.”

“Ooooh … I love celebration pancakes!” Maggie gave her a quick hug. “Can mine have the cinnamon-sugar stuff like you did the last time? Those were delish.”

“Yep. Now get going, or you’ll be late for class. I’ve got Chloe’s guitar lesson after this, but I’ll see you at home.”

“Don’t be too late, Jen. You look tired.” With a quick glance to her watch, she picked up her bag and dashed out the door. “See you later. Have fun!”

True to her word, the movie ended with just enough time to get everyone’s things gathered to go home. After the last car had pulled away, Jen made her way back to Amber’s office to collect her guitar and student. “Hey, Chloe. Are you ready?”

“Yeah.” Looking to her mother, the girl stood. “Are you gonna listen tonight, Mom?”

“I’ll be there in a minute, sweetie.” Amber glanced up with a smile. “I’ve got a little more paperwork to do, then I’ll lock up.”

Not long after, the ten-year-old was tapping her foot as they strummed through Sweet Caroline, laughing when Jen and Amber sang the ‘Bum-Bum-Bum’ that accented the chorus.

“It’s almost six, girls. We need to be wrapping it up.”

“Okay, Mom.” Chloe packed away her guitar, then hugged Jen around the waist. “Thanks, Jen. That was fun!”

“You’re doing great, kiddo.” Jen returned the embrace with a smile. “Pretty soon, you’ll be getting all those chords on your own.”

“You think so?” Wide blue eyes glittered with childish joy.

“I know so.”

“You hear that, Mom? I’m getting good!” She didn’t wait for a response, just picked up her case and dashed for the office to grab her bag.

Amber grinned at her daughter’s back, shaking her head. “She loves learning to play. Thank you for being so patient with her.”

“Hey, there was a day when somebody had to be patient with me. I get it.” As she always did, Jen immediately thought of Matt when she heard her boss’ laughter. Tilting her head, she studied Amber carefully: late twenties, mid-height, long blonde hair, great smile. They’d be cute together.

“You’re staring at me. Did I drop my lunch or something?” Amber brushed her hands down her shirt, looking for stains in the fabric.

“No, but I wanted to ask …” Jen smiled tentatively. “There’s a guy I’d like you to meet. I’ve been considering giving him your number, but I figured I’d better ask first.”

“Guitar teacher and now matchmaker?” A blonde eyebrow arched. “That’s a stretch.”

“Hear me out. His name is Matt, he’s cute and he’s single. He’s working with a friend of mine and I’ve spent quite a bit of time around him. Kind of busy, but a great guy.” She shrugged. “No promises, but it couldn’t hurt for me to pass it on.”

“Well …” Amber bit her lip. “It’s been a long time, Jen.”

“I figured. That’s why this is perfect. No strings attached. I’ll give him your number and if he doesn’t call, then he doesn’t call. You won’t even have met him.”

“When you put it like that, then sure. Why not?”

“Great.” Jen pulled a scrap of paper from her bag. “Do you want him to have this number or your home number?”

“Home. He can leave a message if I’m not there and it won’t lead to a million questions from the secretary.”

“All right. Home it is.” She scratched the number down and pushed the paper in her pocket. “Sorry I was late. I had a meeting with my advisor at school.”

“Really? Everything all right?” Amber picked up her bag and started toward the door, where Chloe was waiting impatiently.

“Actually, everything’s great. I turned in some demos for my portfolio and she loved them.” Jen dug her keys out of her pocket as she stepped outside and headed for her car with a wave. “I’m heading home to celebrate. You ladies have a great night.”

*********************

An array of vehicles was in the drive when she pulled into the garage … rehearsal was running long tonight. She could hear music beneath her feet as she hung her bag in the hallway and returned her guitar to its stand.

A smile formed at the smooth blend of voices coming up from the basement and she trailed her fingers over the piano, making her way to the kitchen to begin assembling the ingredients for the meal she’d been planning. Before long, she had sausage patties and seasoned potatoes cooking in skillets on the stove and a pan of bacon crisping in the oven, the smells making her mouth water as she set out various types of syrups and sauces for pancakes. A glance at the clock told her that Maggie would arrive shortly, so she began mixing together a triple portion of batter and gathering various add-ins, mixing up a deep saucer of cinnamon-sugar and melting some butter for her friend’s requested coated cakes.

Jen was just setting the bowl of potatoes on the table when the door to the garage opened and a familiar groan carried into the room. “Girl, you seriously need to teach me how to cook.”

“I’ve tried, but you seem to think that food tastes better when someone else is fixing it. Remember?” She laughed and headed back to where her griddle was heating. “They’re still working downstairs. If we hurry, you can have your plate fixed before they make an appearance. Do you want your cakes plain or do you want chocolate chips before I coat them?”

“Chocolate chips? Heck, yeah.” Maggie stole a piece of bacon from the platter and was crunching through it as she walked into the kitchen. “So, your meeting was good?”

“It was better than good. It was fantastic.” Jen smiled as she poured three round circles of chocolate chip batter on the griddle. “Professor Summers was … I got the feeling she was impressed.”

“From what I hear, that’s something to be more than happy about. Rumor has it that she really doesn’t get too excited over much.”

“Well, she seemed excited today.” Turning over the cakes expertly, she gave each a pat. “Guess I made a good first impression. Hand me a plate, will you?”

The music from downstairs came to an end as Maggie fetched the plate and studied her calm demeanor for a moment before grinning. “You’re dancing on the inside, aren’t you?”

“You’d better believe it.” She managed to get the cakes off the griddle before she started bopping across the tile floor. “She said my demos were phenomenal!” Her hips swung back and forth as she spun in a circle. “And she can’t wait to hear what else I have!” Laughing, she brushed each pancake with melted butter before tossing them in the cinnamon sugar and stacking them on the plate to hand over to Maggie. “Chocolate Chip Snickerdoodle pancakes, as ordered. Toppings are on the table, if you need them.”

The basement door burst open and a chorus of groans accompanied the group filing out of the hallway as she quickly mixed more chocolate chip batter and poured four circles on the griddle. “Pancakes made to order, guys. Grab a plate and figure out what you want. I’ve got four chocolate chip cooking.”

After a rush of shuffling, she turned to find Joey standing first in line, charming smile in place. “How is it that you don’t have a man, Hot Stuff? Your food alone should have them lined up around the block.”

“Why do I need a man?” She flipped the pancakes onto his plate with a sigh. “I’ve already got at least six to feed most nights.” Arching an eyebrow, her hand playfully patted Joey’s stomach. “Besides, my dating would probably have me somewhere else right now. You wouldn’t want this thing to suffer, would you?” A smile flashed across her face as she steered him out of the way. “Get out of my kitchen. What’ll you have, J?”

Four plates later, the adrenaline was fading and weariness was setting in. She glanced over to JC, who had avoided the line and propped against the counter, talking to Chris and Lance until she sent them to the table, sneaking chocolate chips from the bowl when he thought she wasn’t looking. “Did you leave any for us?”

“Uh …” His eyes met hers like a guilty toddler who’d just gotten caught with his hand in the cookie jar. “There’s enough. Maybe.”

“It’s okay.” Laughing, she went on tiptoe and struggled to reach for a high cabinet. “There’s another bag.”

“Hang on. Let me …” He stepped behind her and put a hand on her waist, reaching over her head easily to open the cabinet and retrieve the bag she’d been grasping for. “These?”

“Yeah. Thanks. You guys sounded great as I was coming in.” She took the chocolate chips and set them down, trying to act unfazed when his hand stayed where it was. “I think we deserve extra tonight, don’t you?”

“Are these celebration pancakes?” His arm went around her, pulling her back until she leaned into his chest. “How did your advisor meeting go?”

“She said my compositions were phenomenal and she can’t wait to hear what I’ve got with lyrics.” Jen relaxed, letting her head rest against him. “I’m supposed to meet with Brian in the lab to record some vocal demos this week.” She looked up at him. “I thought I’d go over after my classes in the morning. Want to help me pick out a few to take?”

“I’d love to.” He squeezed her tightly in a hug and dropped a kiss against her hair. “That’s fantastic, Boof. I’m proud of you.” Blue eyes trailed over her face, darkening with concern. “You look exhausted.”

“Well, I was up late last night finishing out that third piece. And my first class was at eight this morning. It’s been a long day.” With a small smile, she pushed gently against his arm until he let her go. “Long, but great. And I’m starving. How many do you want?”

“You’re doing too much.” Tearing open the bag she’d laid on the counter, he poured some chips into the batter, added what was left in the bowl and stirred it together quickly before letting her approve. “Enough?”

“Yeah.” She watched with a raised brow as he began ladling the last of the batter into five pancakes on the griddle. “Are you seriously cooking for me?”

“Kind of, yeah. I’m a little late to the game.” Picking up the turner, he laughed. “And I probably need supervision, or these might turn out a little crispy. Long enough?”

“Not quite. Give it another minute.” When the edges appeared more firm, she nodded. “Okay, flip them, then pat each one down.”

He obeyed, smiling at the evenly browned surface of the cakes. “How long on this side?”

“Just a minute or two. The center was mostly cooked before the turn.” She reached over and picked up two plates from the counter. “Flip again to make sure they’re brown. Good. They look good.” Her elbow gestured toward the right side of the griddle. “I’ll take those two, you take the rest.”

His eyes cut toward her as he put two of the larger pancakes from the left side on her plate, reserving the smaller ones for himself. “Celebration pancakes, right? Go wild, Jen.”

“If you insist.” With a laugh, she turned off the griddle. “I can’t remember the last time somebody cooked for me. You know, other than in a restaurant. You’re the best, Josh.”

“Really?” He followed her to the empty seats at the table, pulling out her chair with his free hand so she could sit next to Matt. “Surely it’s not been that long.”

“Hmmm …” She thought about it as she poured chocolate sauce on her plate and passed the bottle to him. “My birthday last year. Mom was on second shift, so she fixed lasagna. And you had her make that cake because you were surprising me.” A smile formed as she scooped some Cool Whip from the container. “So, yeah, it’s been about a year.”

“You’ve cooked for yourself every day for a year?” Chris looked around at the plates littering the table with wide eyes. “God, Jen … why?”

“Well, I don’t cook like this every day, Chris. Jeez. I know I’m not exactly skinny, but I’m no Violet Beauregarde ready for the Juicing Room, either.” She laughed and shook her head as she took a bite. “Mom’s appetite never caught up to working seconds and I was afraid that she’d never get back to eating right, so I started cooking our meals together and leaving hers for when she was ready for it.” Her fork stabbed into a potato as she continued. “I’ll eat in a restaurant, but I’m really not a fan of fast food, period. And I’m not above having a bowl of cereal or a sandwich if I’m on my own and seriously not in the mood to fire up the stove. But I know you guys work hard when you’re here and I’d rather you all have a good meal after being active all day.” She lifted her shoulders in a shrug and added another piece of sausage to JC’s plate. “You know me. I have to take care of everybody.”

Her focus went to her plate for a few bites and silence took over as the others traded glances around the table.

“I appreciate it, Jen.” Matt leaned over and draped an arm around her shoulders, squeezing lightly. “More than you probably know.”

“Oh, I might have an idea.” Jen grinned at his empty plate, then her eyes widened and she set her fork down to reach into her pocket. “And I have a gift for you, by the way.” She held a folded piece of paper out to him. “Use this wisely.”

“Use what?” He unfolded the paper, then looked back to her. “Who is Amber and why do I need her number?”

“Amber is my boss and she’s absolutely fabulous.” She sent him a smile. “I know you’re a busy guy – she’s not expecting anything – but if you have any free time at all, she’s single and easing back out of a rough time.”

His brow arched sharply. “You’re setting me up?”

“No, I’m giving you a great opportunity to meet a wonderful woman.” Her head tilted. “She’s around your age, blonde, about Maggie’s height. Every time I hear her laugh, I immediately think of you. Just a head’s up, though … she has a daughter, Chloe, who’s ten and just the sweetest thing. If that’s an issue, then forget all about it.” She reached out and tucked the paper more securely into his hand. “But if you’re really the type of guy I’ve seen you to be, that won’t matter. Like I said, no expectations. I’d just really hate for you to miss out on her.”

“She’s not wrong, Matt.” Maggie spoke up from across the table. “Actually, she’s pretty much a genius. I’ve been trying to figure out who Amber reminded me of since I met her.” She sent a thumbs up to Jen. “Right on!”

“Okay.” Matt slipped the number into his pocket. “I’m not saying yes, but I’ll definitely think about it.”

“That’s all I ask.” Jen nudged him with her elbow. “Who knows? If this music thing doesn’t work out, maybe I should just open a restaurant and start hosting mixers. What do you think?”

“Oh, don’t let her fool you. She was on Cloud Nine earlier because she seriously impressed the professor who has the highest drop out rate on campus.” Maggie laughed. “I don’t think I’ve ever seen anyone with a happy dance like that.”

“Hey, I got positive feedback. That’s deserving of a happy dance, at the very least.”

“That’s great, Girlie.” Lance smiled her direction. “Who’s the professor?”

“Professor Alexandra Summers.” Jen took the last bite off her plate. “She’s direct, no-nonsense, absolutely scary beyond all reason, and wants vocal demos recorded by the end of the week, so I need to make some really good choices, fast. I’m terrified.”

“Alex Summers? Really?” Matt sat up straight. “She was one of the heads at Universal Publishing until she decided to retire a few years ago. I had no idea she was teaching now.” He looked over at Jen and nodded. “Even after retiring, she’s got connections like you wouldn’t believe. Get her to back you, and you’ll have a foot in doors most folks couldn’t even dream of.”

“Great. That totally relaxes me.” Turning an alarming shade of white, she buried her face in her hands. “I’m gonna take the wrong stuff in there and she’s just going to kick me right back out of her office.”

“And that’s definitely what isn’t going to happen.” Maggie stood up and started gathering dishes. “We’re gonna clean up and you’re going to your office for some quiet time before you pick the songs that’re gonna blow her socks off.” She looked over at JC. “Jace, go with her and keep her calm. She’s headed for a major freak out.”

“Yep. Let’s go, Boof.” He took her hand and pulled her from the chair. “You need a little time out and then we’ll figure it out together.”

She didn’t say a word as he led her through the living room and into her office. Once the door was closed behind them, she walked directly to him, fisted her fingers into his shirt and just leaned against him, taking deep, shuddering breaths. He wrapped an arm around her and buried the other hand in her hair, pulling her closer until her arms went around his waist, then started swaying slowly, humming a nonsense tune until her breathing calmed down.

“Josh?”

“Mmhmm?”

Her chest heaved with another deep breath. “I think I need to sit down.”

“Okay.” He took two steps back, only releasing her long enough to get settled on the couch across from the computer desk, his arms going back around her as she curled into his side. “Better?”

“Yeah.” She closed her eyes and rested her cheek against his chest, listening to his steady pulse.

“Overdid it a little today, didn’t you?” His fingers combed through her hair and he rolled his eyes when he felt her shrug. “We get that you’re the mama bear around here, and you can do it all. But you can’t just take care of everybody else, Jen. You’ve got to take care of yourself, too. If you need help with anything, ask. There’s plenty of us around.”

“Uh huh.” Her tone was sleepy and non-committal as she moved, crawling onto his lap and looping an arm around his neck, snuggling further into his chest.

“Hey, I’m serious.” He shook her just a little, until her eyes opened to look up at him. “It’s just the beginning of the term. If you’re this worn out in the first week, then you’re headed for real trouble once testing starts. You’re acting like it’s a race to the finish when you’re still at the starting line. Don’t push yourself this hard, okay? Please? For me?”

“I promise.” She nodded with a sigh, then tucked her face against him again. “My classes start later in the morning and I seriously need a nap. Will you still help me go through some stuff tonight?”

“Yeah, I’ll stick around.” He chuckled and pressed his lips to her forehead, settling back into the cushions when he realized she was already asleep, breathing steadily against him. “Like I’ve got a choice.”

About half an hour later, a knock came at the door before it opened, and Chris poked his head in the room. “You guys decent?”

“As decent as we can be, I suppose.” JC looked up with a grin, shaking his head. “What’s up?”

“Just checking that everything’s all right. It was awfully quiet in here.” Chris studied them for a minute, taking in how his friend was basically acting as a body pillow, Jen sleeping soundly on him. “Man, I’ve never seen anything like the two of you.”

“Yeah, we’re definitely one of a kind.” He glanced down when she began stirring against him, his hand making slow circles over her back. “She’d worn herself out and then stressed into a panic, I guess.”

“Is she okay?”

“She’s fine.” Jen turned her head to look blearily at Chris. “Just needed to chill for a little while. We’re good now.” She removed her arms from around JC’s neck, sitting up straight to stretch out the kinks before kissing his cheek. “Now I know why you’re so into napping. I feel awesome.” Standing up, she stretched again, then moved toward the door.

“Well, I’m glad.” His hands began massaging his thighs, working out the numbness. “I’ll let you know when I can walk again.”

“Wow.” Chris let a laugh escape, biting back the obscene comment hovering on the tip of his tongue. “Okay, then. Matt headed out a little while ago and Joey just took the kids back to the house. Apparently, air hockey brings out violent tendencies in Timberlakes. Especially when there are pool cues hanging around.”

“Oh, my.” Her eyes widened. “Everybody still in one piece?”

“Yep. Between me and Lance, we rescued both Joey and your pool equipment. At least he didn’t go for the darts.”

“And to think I nearly cleared that room out when I moved in. What joy we would’ve missed.” She laughed, then glanced back to JC. “I’ll be right back. Are you still okay to help me?”

“Yeah, I’m good.” He was straightening out his legs slowly, wincing as they came back to life. “Chris, are you ready to go? I can stay here tonight if I need to.”

“Do you care if I sit in, too?” Chris looked to Jen. “I still haven’t gotten to hear any of your finished stuff.”

“I can use all the advice I can get. Grab a seat. Or better yet, start looking.” Her hand gestured toward the bookcase that was filled with thin manila packets as she walked out of the room. “They’re in alphabetical order and each one has a full arrangement disc, a backing demo disc, lead sheet and sheet music in it.”

“Wow.” He walked over to the case, his fingers flipping along the envelope edges until he pulled one out. “She has to have more than two hundred songs here.” Dark eyes darted over to JC. “Any chance any of these are about you?”

“Not that I know of.” JC grimaced as he got to his feet. “But then, the journals with purple dots are off limits to me, too. I’ve got no idea what’s in those. She could’ve killed me off a million times and I’d never know it.”

“Oh, I can make a few educated guesses at what’s so off limits. Seriously, though … you’ve never snuck even a little peek?” Chris slid a few pages of sheet music out to read, grinning as JC shifted his weight slowly. “And do you really think I’m buying that your only issue right now is numbness?”

“I’d like to remain in one piece, so no. She says it’s off limits, then it’s off limits.” A bit of crimson stained the back of his neck. “And did I say my only issue was being numb? No, I didn’t. But there are some things she really doesn’t need to know.”

“Hey, I’ve got eyes, Jace. I don’t blame you one bit.” With a nod, he put the packet back together and set it on the desk. “But Jen’s a really smart cookie. As clingy as you two are, it’s not likely she hasn’t caught on by now.”

“Then avoidance is our game, and we play it well.” JC joined him in flipping through the envelopes. “We’ve had years to practice.”

“Forget that, man. We’ve all seen how you guys dance around each other. As fun as it is to watch, it’s got to be exhausting.” Taking out another packet, he shook his head. “Do you have any idea what it does to her whenever you touch her?”

“We’ve always been touchy and as far as I can tell, she doesn’t react any differently now than when we were kids.”

“That’s because you’re not paying attention. She’s a real pro, you know. She goes stiff, then makes herself relax almost immediately. You totally affect her and she’s really good at not letting you see it.” Chris added the song to the desk. “There’s a flip side here, though. What does it do to you whenever you touch her?”

“I know exactly what it does to me, but it doesn’t matter. Until she lets me know she wants something more, her journals aren’t the only thing off limits.” Blue eyes narrowed dangerously as he glanced over. “For me or anyone else in this group. Look all you want, but don’t even think about trying to touch. She deserves better. Understood?”

“Oh, believe me … we all understand. Any guy who gets close enough to see you two together has no choice but to get the hint.” Dark brows arched. “But do you honestly think there’s any chance she’s going to find someone better for her than you are? If you really can’t see that you’re already the best thing in her world, Jace, then keep your distance. But one good kiss, and I’m pretty sure you’d be changing your own rules.”

“Whatever.” They both went quiet as they heard Maggie and Jen approaching the door. JC’s thumb brushed over a name on the envelope below the song title. “Who do you think Mrs. Novak is?”

“You don’t remember the Novaks? They lived on the corner between us when we were in high school.” Jen smiled as they came in the room, passing them bottles of water. “Mr. Novak got really sick after you left for the show and I started doing grocery runs for them. He passed away not long after that, and Mrs. Novak was so sad that I made a point to stop in and visit her.” She took the packet from him, pulling out the disc and lead sheet. “She always made the best peanut butter cookies – I’ve got the recipe somewhere – and loved to talk about how they met. Their parents were against them being together, but even after sixty years of marriage, she said that he was the only one she’d ever wanted.” Powering on the sound system, she opened the disc tray. “The day after I finished this, I took my guitar over and played it for her. She just hugged me and cried. A few weeks later, she was gone, too.”

Piano and guitar music filled the room, accented by a simple percussion track, and she leaned against the desk, nodding her head to the beat as she followed along with the lead sheet in her hand. By the second verse, she’d put the page down and was mimicking the guitar chords against her legs, reciting the words from memory.

Ain’t nothin’ better
We beat the odds together
I’m glad we didn’t listen
Look at what we would be missin’

They said "I bet they’ll never make it"
But just look at us holdin’ on
We’re still together, still goin’ strong

You’re still the one I run to
The one that I belong to
You’re still the one I want for life
You’re still the one that I love
The only one I dream of
You’re still the one I kiss good night

The chorus repeated once more, then Chris glanced over at JC when the song ended, eyes widened. “I know I’ve joked about it before, but she’s seriously not human, is she?” When JC just grinned, he shook his head and turned back to Jen. “You wrote that in high school and you’re worried about your lyrics not being good enough? What planet are you from?”

“One that breeds bleeding hearts, apparently.” She sighed. “You know, weaklings who go hunting for a recipe I haven’t seen in years just because you lit up at the words ‘peanut butter cookies’?”

“Score!”

“Home planets aside, definitely take that one. That was awesome. You really need to use the song you were working on for Jake and Sam, too, if it’s finished. You know, the foolish games one? And how about the one you were writing for me?” Maggie headed across the room, then turned to the desk when she noticed a note on an envelope laying on the edge. “Hey, who’s ‘Guy from Smoothie Shop’?”

“Literally what it says – a guy from a smoothie shop.” Jen laughed as she took the packet Maggie was holding. “The Saturday after we moved in, I had to run to a few stores and skipped lunch, so I stopped in this little shop for a smoothie. I’d only been there a few minutes and this guy in a suit just sat down across from me and started talking. When he realized I wasn’t who he thought I was, he tried to leave, but I felt bad for him, so I got him to stay and vent. He’d just been the best man at his cousin’s wedding and the bride was his ex-girlfriend. They’d dated all through high school and into college, then she dropped him just as he was about to propose. Not even a year later, there they were. He wasn’t totally over her, but he did right by his cousin and stood up for him.” She made sure she had the full arrangement disc before putting it in the tray. “I never got his name, but he seemed like a nice guy. His heart was still a little broken, and the only negative he could come up with was that he’d hated the champagne at the ceremony. I came home and wrote this. It’s really for a male vocal, but I don’t see why it wouldn’t work. I love the arrangement, and the third verse and bridge are one of my favorites.”

“Can I?” JC held his hand out for the sheet music as the disc began to play, sight-reading quickly as the song progressed, paying close attention to the part she’d said was her favorite.

Your wagon’s been hitched to a star
Well now, he’ll be your thing that’s new
Yeah, what little I have you can borrow
’Cuz I’m old and I’m blue

And for the million hours that we were
Well, I’ll smile and remember it all
Then I’ll turn and go
While your story’s completed, mine is a long way from done

Chris leaned over and followed along for the last choruses, adding a higher harmony to the lead line.

Jen grinned at Maggie as the music closed and gestured to the duo, who were still studying the sheet music. “And that’s when I’ll know I’ve made it.”

“What?” Chris looked up from where he was pointing something out on the pages with an approving nod. “When?”

“When you guys are huge – you know it’s going to happen – and I write something your powers-that-be actually want you to record, I’ll know I’ve made it.”

“Somehow, I think you’re going to get there before we do.” Chris looked back down at the lyrics. “You’re more than a songwriter, Jen … you’re a storyteller. I’ll bet you have songs on those shelves that big names are going to be fighting over long before we get to release anything.”

“Well, I guess there’s only one way to find out, huh?” She walked over to the bookcase, flipped through and quickly pulled out five more packets. “Give me a few more minutes and we’ll call it a night. Tomorrow could just be the day that makes or breaks my career.”

The Music building was beautiful, she noticed, striving for the appearance of an actual production company’s offices. The open, airy atmosphere of the commons area blended seamlessly into four floors of classrooms, rehearsal spaces, lesson rooms and recording studios. She was really looking forward to starting her regular classes on the second floor in the morning, but right now, as she made her way to what seemed to be a reception desk, Jen had to consider that maybe breakfast hadn’t been such a good idea.

“Hey. You look a little lost.” The young guy behind the desk sent her a friendly smile, crossing his arms as he swiveled in his chair. “Which class are you looking for?”

“Hi. I’m looking for Brian …” Jen blinked quickly, suddenly realizing she didn’t have a last name. “Actually, that’s all I’ve got.” She laughed and shook her head. “Professor Summers just directed me to Brian in the labs. Any idea if he’s in today?”

“Yeah, he came in earlier. Hang on a sec.” Grabbing a cordless phone from beneath the desk, he punched in a few numbers, then waited for a second. “Hey, man. You in the middle of something? I’ve got …” He glanced at her quickly. “What’s your name?”

“Jen. Jen Lawson.”

“Yeah, I’ve got a Jen Lawson here looking for you. Summers sent her over.” The chair spun again as he listened. “Okay, yeah. I’ll send her up.” The phone beeped in disconnect. “He’s just closing out a session, but he’ll be ready by the time you get there. Take the elevators at the end of this hall to the third floor, then go right. Follow the signs to the Green Rooms and he’ll be in studio four. If the light by the door is off, just knock and go on in.”

“Okay. Thanks, uh …”

“Adam.”

“Right.” She flashed him a smile then turned to make her way down the hallway toward the elevators. “Thanks, Adam.”

“Good luck, Jen.” He swung the chair around to watch as she moved out of sight and sighed. “With the way he just sounded, you’ll need it.”

As she stepped onto the third floor, Jen immediately found a sign directing her to the Green Rooms. Swallowing hard, she pulled her bag higher on her shoulder and started walking, making a turn down another hallway just as a door ahead of her opened, a blonde girl rushing out and past her, making an odd choking noise as she went.

“Hey. Are you okay?” Alarmed, she almost turned to follow her.

“No!” The girl looked back, revealing the tears running down her face. “He’s … he’s awful!” And just like that, she was gone, barreling around the corner and back the way Jen had come.

Brows raised high, wide brown eyes turned to read the sign on the door the girl had just escaped from.

Green Rooms

“Oh, great.” She sighed as she opened the door, stepping into a waiting room surrounded by doors marked with studio numbers. Every light was off, so she found the door labeled with a four and knocked, then pushed it open cautiously. “Hello?”

“Hey, come on in.” A tall, dark haired guy was seated at the board, his back to her as she walked in and dropped her bag in an open seat. “Jen?”

“Yeah. Brian?”

“That’s me.” His fingers adjusted a few settings, quickly moving over the switches and knobs before him. “Summers sent you over?”

“She did.” Jen crossed her arms, studying his posture. “You didn’t happen to just send a blonde girl running for her life and sobbing as if the world was falling apart, did you?”

“Probably. She wasted an hour of my life on some tuneless drivel about a pickup truck and an ice cream sandwich.” He laughed, spinning the chair around to face her and coming to a sudden stop, his gaze freezing on her face. “Well, this is a tiny world. Smoothie girl?”

“Wow. Yeah, I guess it is.” A grin brightened her features when she recognized him. “You look much better than you did the last time I saw you. How are you doing?”

“I’m good. Glad I have a name to put with the face, Jen.” He smiled, gesturing for her to sit down. “I didn’t thank you for letting me vent that day. You probably should’ve just kicked me out of your booth.”

“Nah, you needed an ear.” She sat in the cushioned chair across from him and shrugged sheepishly. “And to be honest, I went home and wrote about it.” Her hand motioned toward her bag. “I hope you don’t mind. I didn’t think I’d ever see you again.”

“If it’s a hit, then I don’t mind at all.” Brian leaned back in his chair and studied her carefully. “Summers doesn’t usually make a habit of sending folks my way. What gives with you?”

“I turned in some composition pieces that she liked.” Her shoulders lifted in another shrug. “She really wanted to see what I could do with lyrics.”

“Trust me, if she’s sending you directly to me, she more than liked them.” His brow lifted. “I’m the student director of the Music Technology section. I train the guys who work with everybody else and take on the odd jobs when there’s nobody else available, if I’m not booked at my own studio.” He crossed his arms over his chest. “I’m not gonna lie, Jen. If it sucks, I’ll say so. Some people – like Tiffany who was just here – don’t have skin thick enough for this business. If you don’t have the grit to handle criticism, you’ll never make it.”

“Be as brutal as you want. If I can improve, I want to.” She nodded, the corner of her mouth lifting in a slight smile. “I’m a big girl. I can take it.”

“Okay. Let’s see what you’ve got.” The chair squeaked as he leaned forward. “Do you need musicians? Or did you bring arrangements?”

“I have my own.” Reaching for her bag, she unzipped it to reveal a stack of envelopes. “Just simple piano and guitar, minimal strings and maybe a little percussion if I felt the rhythm needed to be established.”

“Perfect. You don’t want to embellish too much on a demo. Most artists want to choose material that they can do their own thing with. But I do hope you’ve got full arrangements to record over, too. Having the sheet music ready will make putting together your Senior showcase easier.” His eyes widened when he saw how many she’d brought with her. “I can give you two hours, but that’s about it for today. We might make it through two or three if we can keep it to five takes.”

“I’m not the best vocalist in the world, but I’m passable. And these are my babies. I know them backwards and forwards. We probably won’t need to do them more than twice, unless you say so.”

He laughed. “Confident little thing, aren’t you?”

“Not really. I’m just well practiced.” She shook her head. “And I know that you don’t want a lot of vocal gymnastics on a demo, anyway. Straight and simple is the best way to sell a song.”

“Exactly.” Pulling a few of the packets from her bag, he stacked them next to the board. “Just tell me where you want to start and we’ll get going.” Another laugh escaped when he saw the notations on the top envelope. “I guess I’m ‘Guy from Smoothie Shop’, huh?”

“Yeah.” Grinning, she stood. “Let’s save that one for last, if you don’t care. I think it’s really more suited for a male vocal, but I’ll let you make that call.”

“Okay. We’ll start with Foolish Games, then.” He put the disc in the system and started loading the track for playback. “There’s some water in the cabinet over there. Help yourself.” Sizing her up, he measured the height of the microphone in the booth. “And we don’t want you to be standing on your toes, either. Let’s make sure you’re comfortable.”

“Sounds good.” She collected her sheet music and followed him into the booth, her fingers playing with the label on her water bottle. “So … how many people do you make cry on a daily basis?”

“Maybe two or three.” His shoulders shook with quiet chuckles as he lowered the microphone to her height. “I’m not that bad, I promise. I just know good work when I hear it. We get a lot of horrible stuff that comes through here.”

“Well, here’s hoping I don’t fall in that category.” With a smile, she pulled a stool over to the rigging and adjusted the height of the music stand. “Do you want me right up on it, or does it matter?”

“You want to be close to the filter, but you don’t have to eat it.” He checked the set up one last time before moving to the door. “You’ll be able to hear me in the headphones, but I won’t bother you while the track is going unless I think we need to stop. Okay?”

“Perfect. Thanks.” She took a deep, cleansing breath, then a drink of water as he took his place behind the board. The headphones settled into place just in time for her to hear his voice.

“You ready?”

“As ready as I’m ever going to be.”

“Relax. It’s okay if you don’t get it with the first take. We’ve got plenty of time.” He pushed a few buttons. “Just give me a thumbs up if the volume is okay.”

When the music began, she nodded and signaled to him, then edged forward in anticipation of the intro for the first verse.

On the other side of the glass, Brian made sure he was muted so he wouldn’t disturb her with his reactions, then leaned back in his chair and closed his eyes as the music swelled around him. “Please, God … don’t let her be another Tiffany.”

By the first chorus, he was leaning forward, completely disregarding any of the adjustments he would’ve normally been making as he watched her. She had her eyes closed, not even needing the sheet music as she used a shockingly clear tone to tell her story over one of the most impressive demo arrangements he’d ever heard. Not only was the lyrical content stellar, but the track left plenty open for interpretation, and he knew that the voice would be selling songs to chart-topping artists before anybody knew what was happening.

Too soon, it was over and he was closing out the session, glancing up only when he heard her clear her throat and take a drink.

“Should we do it again? I thought it went well, but you’re the expert here.”

“Uh, I think we’re good. That was fantastic.” He laughed at her doubtful expression and shook his head. “Really, you got that in the first take. It couldn’t have been better. You didn’t happen to bring the full arrangement, did you? I’d love to hear how you fleshed it out.”

“I didn’t even think of it. I’ll make sure to bring both next time.”

“That’d be great. Summers likes to hear finished products as well as the demo version. Makes it easier for her to help with putting together your Senior project.” Putting a blank disc in the burner, he set to finalizing the demo. “I’m going to make individual discs for your portfolio submissions, but I’ll also make you a compilation so you have something to keep at home.”

“Great.” She looked down as she tightened the lid back on her bottle. “Thank you.”

“Tell me something … who played for your arrangement?”

“I did.”

“Yeah, right.” His expression was unconvinced as she arched a brow at him. “Seriously?”

“Yep. All of my arrangements are totally me, with my computer providing any orchestral strings or percussion I need. I started playing piano when I was eight and picked up the acoustic guitar when I was thirteen.” Her head tilted as her fingers played with the edges of her sheet music. “I bought an electric as a graduation present for myself. I’m passable, but I don’t think it shows up on any of these.”

There was that word again. For a second, he wondered what her definition of passable might be. “Okay, then one more thing: who in their right mind would break that heart of yours?”

“What? Nobody.” She looked up, confused, then laughed. “Oh, right. Wuthering Heights.”

“The book?”

“Yeah. We had to read it for my Lit class this past summer. Hated the book, loved the inspiration.”

“Well, there you have it.” He reached over when the disc finished, labeled it and slid it into a case before flipping through her collection. “You good to go for Commitment?”

“Whatever you say. Bring it on.” She turned to the right pages, then settled on the stool. “Anytime you’re ready.”

With a wave, he loaded the track, prepped the board and set the disc, sitting back once again to watch her work. The country sound surrounding him was a surprise, but she tackled it like a pro, even getting a slight southern edge to some of the lyrics.

Four songs later, he was reaching for the cordless unit by the desk, quickly dialing the number for an office a few buildings over. “Alex? You’ve got to hear this.” He held the phone out so she could hear what was reverberating around the room.

Sorry I never told you all I wanted to say
And now it’s too late to hold you
’Cuz you’ve flown away, so far away

Never had I imagined living without your smile
Feeling, knowing you hear me
It keeps me alive, alive

And I know you’re shining down on me from heaven
Like so many friends we’ve lost along the way
And I know eventually we’ll be together
One sweet day

“Brian? Is that Jen in your studio?”

“Who else would it be?” Spinning the chair around, he checked to make sure the girl behind the glass was doing all right. “Where did you find her?”

“Music Comp I. Bachelor’s track.”

“You’re kidding. She’s a freshman?”

“Basically. She was taking care of core credits at a community college before she came here, but only the foreign language met transfer requirements.” Silence carried over the line, and he could picture Alex reclining in her desk chair, listening. “She’s even better than I’d hoped. Isn’t she astounding?”

“Uh, yeah. I’d say so. Her lyrical content is killer and her demo arrangements are the best I’ve ever heard.” Leaning back, he ran a hand through his hair. “We’re going to finish eight demos today. Eight. And we’ve only been here a little over an hour. She’s incredible.”

“What do you suggest?”

“Get Mac on the phone. Like, today.” He gave Jen a smile and a nod as the track ended, then started closing it out. “If you’re looking to make a splash, I’d place my bets on her.” Twisting back around, he picked up the packet that had his ‘name’ on it. “Student or not, this girl is gonna be huge and she’ll need someone to mind the business for her. Mac’s involved, honest and fair. He’s your guy.”

“That’s what I was thinking.” She gave a satisfied sigh. “Send her to my office when you’re finished. I’ll give him a call and set up a meeting to get the business squared away.” The smile in her voice was genuine. “And I can’t wait to hear what else you two accomplished today.”

“Will do.” He glanced back toward Jen, grinning as she did a happy little jig when she thought he wasn’t looking. “Really, Alex … you’ve got something special here. Take care of her.”

*********************

The Jeep was in the drive when she pulled in that evening, a few cars she didn’t recognize parked next to it, and her brow furrowed as she wondered if she should’ve been expecting the guys to be there. She couldn’t remember any changes to their schedule, and she shrugged as she parked.

“Josh must’ve needed a break from the Funky Bunch.” Her gaze landed on Maggie’s little car parked on the other side of the garage. “And she must have a study session tonight. Great.”

The garage door whirred as it came down to close, and she paused when she saw Maggie’s backpack lying next to the door leading into the house. “Lot of good that’s doing her.” Leaning back across the front seat, she grabbed her bag and the file of papers Alex had given her before sending her out for her afternoon class.

“I’ve contacted Peter MacArthur, a colleague of mine. He’ll be coming in to advise us on the best way to handle your portfolio. Make sure to read over the details of the contract carefully. Mac will take good care of you, but he won’t sign unless he’s sure you’re well-read on the small print. He’ll break it down for you when we meet next week, but please be prepared when you arrive. Put in more time with Brian over the next few days to finalize more demos and to record over any full arrangements you have ready. And bring any other composition work you have completed with you as well. Your portfolio needs to grow, and quickly.”

Shaking her head, she bent down to pick up Maggie’s bag, then pushed her way into the house. Some sporting event was playing on the TV, the cheers of the crowd echoing down the hallway as she hung her bag on its hook and reached in for the disc Brian had sent with her. Tucking it between her fingers with a smile, she flipped open the folder and began reading the first page as she walked to the foot of the stairs, not even looking up as she set Maggie’s pack on the bottom step.

“Hey, Mags, you left your bag in the garage!” She had to yell to be heard over the television, then her stomach clenched in hunger when her senses clued in to the delicious smell around her. “And whatever you had delivered smells awesome!”

Still engrossed in the contract, she was halfway to her office when a hand gripped her arm, giving her a tug. She jumped and screamed, the disc falling to the floor and skittering underneath one of the couches, papers scattering as the file flew from her hand when she whipped around and swung her fist upward, landing a solid right hook to her attacker’s face.

“Ow!”

She’d settled into a boxing stance, terror spiking through her veins, when she looked down to see Joey sprawled at her feet, hands covering his face and writhing in pain. “Joey?” Staring at him, she took deep breaths, calming down enough to realize what she’d just done. “Joey!” Horrified, she dropped to her knees next to him, pulling his hands away from his face to inspect the damage and grimacing at the blood coming from his split lip. “I’m sorry! Are you okay?”

“My God, Jenny … I think you broke my jaw.” He mumbled, but it was swallowed up by the blaring of the TV and the laughter shrieking from the kitchen.

“Seriously, guys?” She glared in the general direction of the peanut gallery, then focused back on Joey. “Somebody wet a dish towel and get some ice.” Cheers rang out again and she growled. “And turn off the damn TV!” The room suddenly went quiet and she ignored the pain in her hand to let her fingers press gently against his cheek and jaw, already bright red and swelling from the force of her punch. “I’m so sorry, Joe Bear. I didn’t mean it, I swear.”

“Yeah, sure.” He winced when the words worked over his injured lip, sending blood flowing more freely. “You’ve got some pent-up rage there, Hot Stuff.”

“I’ve been taking self-defense classes since my senior year. The boxing is my favorite part.” A bundled, wet towel appeared in front of her and she didn’t even look up as she took it, immediately pressing the blue fabric against his face and using the corner to dab at his lip. “I don’t think anything’s broken. Are your teeth okay?”

“I think so.” A sigh escaped as the coolness of the ice pack settled against his cheek.

“Can you get up? You didn’t hit your head, did you?” He shook his head as she helped him sit up. “Jeez, Joe. You shouldn’t sneak up on people like that.”

“Well, I didn’t know you were a UFC fighter in another life, or I would’ve been more careful.”

“Here, take this.” She gestured for him take over holding the ice pack to his face, her brow furrowing when she saw the red stains all over his shirt. “That’s not blood, is it? I didn’t think a split lip could do all that.”

“No, that’s my attempt at tomato sauce.” His shoulder shrugged toward the kitchen. “Right, Mom?”

“That’s right.” A woman with Joey’s build and a sparkle of humor in her eyes had her arms crossed over her chest, obviously fighting back laughter. “A definite attempt.”

“Oh, hey, Mrs. Fatone.” Jen blinked, wondering why Joey’s mother was standing in her kitchen before looking back to him. “I may joke about killing him sometimes, but I promise I wouldn’t actually do it. For some strange reason, I like having him around.”

“It’s Phyllis, Jen.” She had turned back to stir something in a pot on the stove and point Maggie in the direction of the oven, her smile lifting her tone. “And trust me, we’ve all threatened his life at least once or twice.” Joey snorted, shaking his head again. “He’s just too darn loveable to stay angry with, isn’t he?”

“Something like that, sure.” JC knelt beside her and took her hand, reaching out with another iced towel. “What’s that for?”

“You.” Only when he pressed the wet fabric to her knuckles did she hiss against the pain. “You didn’t break it, did you?”

“God, I hope not. That’d put a real kink in things.” She lifted the corner of the towel, wincing when she saw the red and broken skin across the top of her swollen hand. “Maybe it’s just bruised.” Suddenly realizing that there were people moving through the living room, she looked around quickly. “Hey, be careful of the paperwork, please. I doubt they’d be impressed if I showed up with shoe prints all over it.”

“We’ve got you covered, Jenny.” Chris had bent down to pick up a few of the scattered sheets and began reading the page in front of him. “What’s this?”

“A contract.” She leaned against JC as he helped her stand, then raised her wrapped hand closer to her chest as she looked around for the disc she’d been carrying. “Anybody see a CD lying anywhere?”

“It went sliding this way.” Justin was on his stomach, fishing underneath first one couch, then the other, until he found the case. “Got it.”

“Great.” A relieved sigh lifted her shoulders as she watched Lance give Joey a hand up. “I don’t know if Brian deletes sessions after he’s done. That may be my only copy.” She shot a quick look over to Maggie, who was helping locate the rest of the scattered pages. “Speaking of … you’re never going to guess who Brian is, Mags.”

“No?” The redhead picked up the folder and began sliding pages inside. “Who is he?”

“Guy from Smoothie Shop.”

Maggie, Chris and JC all turned to stare at her.

“You’re kidding.” Maggie laughed. “What’re the chances of that?”

“I know, right?”

“Wait.” Lance glanced between the four of them, eyes widened in confusion. “What guy from a smoothie shop?”

“Some dude with a broken heart busted up into Jenny’s booth in a smoothie shop and she let him vent. Turns out he’s the recording engineer her advisor wanted her to use.” Chris chuckled under his breath, then raised his head with a bright smile. “Best part is, she wrote a song about him and took it with her for a demo session today. I’d love to hear how that went over.”

“Actually, it went really well. He had me change the gender of the lyrics, but he really didn’t mind at all.” She put a little pressure on her hand, wincing when the massage sent pain through her wrist. “Probably a good thing, since we’ll be working together for at least this term. I’m not sure when he’s supposed to graduate … or if he’s even really a student. He mentioned having his own studio already.” A brow raised questioningly as she glanced back at Maggie. “Are student directors actually students?”

“They can be, I guess.”

“Anyway, he was great.” Jen shook her head suddenly, looking at the group of people around her. “Wait. Why are you guys even here? Not that I mind at all, but did your schedule change?”

“They’re here having a lesson in spicy chicken rigatoni with tomato sauce, salad and homemade garlic bread.” Phyllis spoke up from the kitchen. “Which wasn’t necessarily a success, but it’s ready, if you all are.”

“You’re joking.” A nudge from JC sent her walking into the kitchen, looking around Joey’s mother’s arm to get a whiff of the delicious dishes spread across the counter. “It looks wonderful to me.” She leaned closer and lowered her voice. “Did it end up being all you?”

“Pretty much.” The older woman laughed. “Bless their hearts, they were willing, but totally unskilled. Okay, boys … to the table it goes.” As they carried the platters and bowls to the table, Phyllis wrapped an arm around Jen’s waist. “It’s the thought that counts, though. They’re a bunch of sweethearts.”

“I won’t argue, but what brought this on?”

“It appears they decided you needed a break. Hearing the way Joe talks about you, I’d have to say that I agree.” She led Jen out of the kitchen and toward the table, where JC pulled out a chair for each of them. “You’ve been spoiling them since you got here. Not only do they come here to relax, they spend half their time rehearsing in your space, then you feed the entire crew after you’ve been at school and work all day.”

“It’s not all that much …”

“Honey, I raised that one and putting up with him – and that stomach of his – on a regular basis is enough.” Phyllis met Joey’s slightly offended expression, made more wounded by the ice pack he was still pressing to his face. “No offense, son, but you’re just like your daddy. You and your brother both came by it honest.” She laughed when he shrugged sheepishly, then paused to scoop some salad into a bowl for Jen. “Anyway, that’s just one. You’ve got five of these man-children that you handle nearly daily. That qualifies you for sainthood in my book.”

“And you’ve got a housemate who requires constant attention, too.” Maggie chimed in from across the table. “You rescued me from campus housing hell and put me in a spot most underclassmen would kill for. You went to a job interview and walked away with work for both of us. And how many times have you helped me with my classes? You listened to me memorizing monologues all summer and helped me study for that God-awful algebra final – you knew that I was already a year behind because of Mom being sick and made sure I didn’t get even further off schedule by having to retake that class. Not to mention your work with the kids at the center, putting together pieces for Sam and Jake’s choreography projects and then working on your own stuff, too.” Her features lit with a smile. “I’m glad I was able to make a good friend, but you’re all kinds of extra, girl.”

“You don’t get it. I love having a full house.” Brown eyes moved across the people around her table. “I’m an only child of only children. No uncles, aunts, or cousins. My parents were both older and couldn’t have more kids. Dad kept getting different contracting assignments and we moved around a lot those first few years. I hated being alone so much and I really didn’t have anybody until Josh found me. When his family adopted mine, I thought it was the best thing ever, because I’d always wanted a bunch of brothers and sisters and there he was with not just Heather and Tyler, but this whole crew of cousins that were always coming around.” She noticed distractedly when JC dipped a healthy portion of pasta onto her plate. “I knew things would be different when I came down for school, but I figured he’d be here, so it’d be all right. And it is. You guys are family. I don’t mean to be so motherish, but I’d rather surround myself with good people and spoil them than to ever think about being alone again.” A laugh escaped when he added bread on top of the pasta, and she turned to him. “Really? Are you going to feed me, too?”

“Well, somebody has to, Boof. You just tried to break yourself on Joey’s face, remember?” He gestured toward the hand still cradled against her chest and arched a brow. “Can you even hold a fork? Because I know you’re a total disaster doing anything left-handed.”

“Good point.” Heaving an exasperated sigh, she grinned, then reached for the bread. “So, the fork’s out, but I can still handle this on my own.” Taking a bite, she closed her eyes at the delicious flavors that flooded her mouth. “Wow, that’s good. I may need to take lessons from you, Mrs. … Phyllis.” She quickly corrected herself when a brief glance cut toward her. “I’m okay with biscuits and pizza dough, and I can hold my own with cakes and stuff, but I’ve never really mastered a good loaf bread or rolls.”

“Any time, honey. You just yell and we’ll do it.” Phyllis sent a smile her way. “Actually, we can trade secrets. Joe brought me one of your calzones and it was dynamite. I’m determined to figure out what you put in the crust and sauce.” With a quiet chuckle, Jen leaned over and whispered in her ear, then sat back with a playful wink. “You’re kidding! I never would have thought to try that.”

“Some things we learn by happy accident.” JC nudged her and she turned to find him holding out a loaded fork. “Josh … this is really kind of embarrassing.”

“You want embarrassing? I can totally make airplane noises.” He laughed at her glare, then nodded toward the offered bite. “Open up.” Rolling her eyes, she leaned forward and took the food. “Good girl.”

“Shut up.” She muttered around chewing, shaking her head at the laughter from around the table. “Mmm. That’s delicious, Phyllis. Thanks, guys.” Her eyes narrowed as she stared down at her injured hand. “I’m not sure how I’ll be able to follow through on house rule number one, though. We’ll figure it out.”

“Rule number one doesn’t apply tonight. We’ve got it.” Chris nodded as he finished off a piece of bread. “You’ve got a contract to look over, don’t you? What’s up with that?”

“Honestly, I’m not really sure.” Taking another offered bite, she thought about it. “After we finished in the lab, Brian sent me over to see Professor Summers. She didn’t take the time to listen to the demos from today, but she was telling me that she’s contacted a friend and we’re scheduled to meet with him next Wednesday. He’s supposed to be handling my portfolio and taking care of the legal stuff, I think. I didn’t get that far into the paperwork.”

“Really? Already?” JC glanced over as he speared a bite of salad for her. “Does that happen for everybody?”

“I have no idea. Considering the reactions I’ve gotten from her and Brian, I’m gathering that this isn’t a normal situation for any of us.”

“How many of your songs did you get through today?” Maggie took a drink from her glass. “I’m kind of excited to hear how mine turned out.”

“All of them.” Jen nodded toward the disc Justin had laid next to the sound system. “The entire session is on that CD I brought in. I’m supposed to go back in the morning to get others on disc for submission, and they want to hear my full arrangements along with my demo tracking.” She glanced down at her hand, biting her lip. “I don’t have classes at all tomorrow, so if the swelling doesn’t go down with ice, I’ll head over to the Health Clinic early and make it to the labs by ten. Brian’s giving me three hours and said to bring as many pieces as I can carry.” Her gaze bounced around the table. “He didn’t seem to believe me when I said I’ve got plenty to choose from. Do I even need to worry about being picky at this point?”

“I wouldn’t think so.” Chris had risen from the table, heading for the living room and loading the CD. “The worst they can do is tell you one or two don’t make the cut. Just take anything you feel strongly about.”

Foolish Games began to fill the room, JC continuing to alternate between clearing both of their plates as the others listened intently.

“I didn’t know you were doing the same thing as the boys, honey.” Phyllis looked at her and nodded in approval. “Very nice.”

“Oh, I’m not.” Swallowing the last bite, Jen shook her head. “I’m aiming to be the one writing the songs, not performing them. Being in front of people is definitely not for me.”

“Well, that’s a shame. You have a beautiful voice, dear.”

“Exactly. And we need to work on that stage fright of yours.” Maggie tilted her head as the music changed. “Country? Really?” She laughed when the lyrics began and shook her head. “You made mine a country song? That’s fantastic!”

“When did you learn how to add twang?” JC arched a brow at her. “Do you even listen to country?”

“Not really, but she was talking and I was taking notes, and by the time the lyrics were done, it just seemed like a country song.” Jen shrugged as the chorus began. “I think it works.”

Commitment
Someone who’ll go the distance
I need somebody with staying power
Who’ll make me go weak in the knees
Commitment
And everything that goes with it
I need honor and love in my life from somebody
Who’s playin’ for keeps

“It more than works. You pretty much nailed it.” Lance nodded, grinning as he sat back in his seat and crossed his arms. “And don’t listen to Jace about the twang. It really sounds natural, and that’ll be a selling point.”

“Well, if it’s got the Mississippi stamp of approval, then it’s a winner.” She winked at him and laughed, then grimaced when pain shot through her hand. “I think it’s time for more ice. How’re you doing over there, Joe Bear?”

“It’s not exactly better, but I don’t think it’s any worse.” He lowered the towel and worked his jaw a bit. “I’ll be all right. I’ve survived bigger fights than that.”

“Whatever you say.” Pushing back her chair, she stood and moved toward the kitchen. “I’m gonna be the wimp who needs more chilling.”

She draped the soaked towel over the rack beside the sink, then turned to find that JC had already found a Ziplock bag and was dropping some cubes in it. “Do you have an Ace bandage? It’ll do better to hold it in place and apply pressure.”

“I don’t know.” She took the bag and sighed as the cold began spreading back through her hand. “There might be one in the cabinet beside the fridge. It looked like a jock had stocked it when I moved in, but I never went through it.”

He dug around the shelves for a minute and came out with a roll of athlete’s tape. “It’s not a bandage, but it should do. Come here.” With a shake of her head, she obediently stepped over to him, holding out her hand. His brow furrowed as his fingers gingerly touched the swollen skin to secure the tape and begin wrapping. “Are you sure you don’t want me to take you to the ER? That looks nasty.”

“I think it’ll be okay.” She wiggled her fingers slowly. “If it was broken, I don’t think I’d be able to move it that much.” A laugh escaped. “Besides, what would I tell them? I think I broke my hand punching a guy?”

“Always have to be the tough one, don’t you?” He finished wrapping and tore the tape, tossing the roll onto the counter.

“Yep.” A smile formed quickly as she leaned against him for half of a hug. “Thanks, Josh.”

“No problem.” His glance moved over to Joey, taking in the painful state of his face, and a different scenario formed in his imagination, prompting a grin as he pulled her closer to him, leaning down to whisper in her ear. “I can just imagine Luke Dingess on the receiving end of those fists of fury.” She laughed with him. “For this second, I don’t hate him quite as much.”

By the time the recording of that day’s session had ended, the table and kitchen had been cleared and the guys had adjourned to the basketball court, giving Phyllis hugs of thanks and calls of goodbye as she headed the opposite direction and out the front door, leaving Maggie and Jen to relax in front of the TV.

Maggie leaned over to look at the group in the back yard, then nudged Jen’s foot with her own. “Girl, do you have any idea how lucky you are?”

“Luckier than I deserve, I’m sure.” She glanced up from flipping through her journal, arching an eyebrow. “Why?”

“You’ve got that guy wrapped around your little finger and you don’t even realize it.” A dreamy sigh carried through the room. “I’d give anything to have somebody look at me the way he looks at you.”

“Josh doesn’t look at me any differently than he does anybody else.”

“Oh, shut up. You walk in the room and he lights up.” Maggie bit back a laugh. “You do the same thing. Get the two of you together and it’s basically blinding.”

“Mags …” Jen rolled her eyes and snapped her journal closed. “We’re best friends. That’s it.”

“It sure doesn’t look that way.”

“Look, I know Josh better than anyone on this planet. If he wanted more, he’d say so. He hasn’t, so he doesn’t.”

“Simple as that, huh?”

“Absolutely. Simple as that.”

“So he hasn’t said anything.” Maggie shrugged. “What about you? Don’t you want more?”

“It doesn’t matter what I want.” Jen turned her gaze down to where the fingers of her left hand were playing with the edges of her ‘bandage’. “It never has, and it never will.”

“That definitely wasn’t a no.” The redhead leaned closer. “Jen … do you have feelings for him?”

“I think I’ve been falling for him since the sixth grade, when I got myself grounded so he could go to the prom with that Patterson brat.” She let out a quiet laugh and shook her head. “He and I both know the type of girl he’s going to end up with, and it’s definitely not me. The only thing she and I will have in common is hair color. He tends to lean toward brunette for his girlfriends.”

“How can you say that? You’re perfect for each other.”

“What I say right now goes nowhere else, understand?” Her gaze locked on her friend, serious and unflinching. “You’ve got to swear. Nobody else knows about this, not even my mother. I’ll know if it gets around.”

“I swear. It stays right here.”

“Well, you’ve seen the pictures, so you know he took me to my senior prom.” She waited for Maggie’s nod. “When he was dropping me off after the dance, he kissed me goodnight and totally rocked my world – we’re talking electric here, Mags – and I was confused at first, positive that it was all in my head. A few days later, I’d actually gotten up the nerve to talk to him and see if maybe it wasn’t just me. You know how jittery I get when I’m nervous and this was twice as bad, so I decided to walk over to his house. All of the houses on our block have trees on the back property line, so there’s a little bit of a forest in the middle.”

“Well, we’ve gone back and forth so much, there’s a path connecting our houses that takes you right beside the windows of their dining room.” Her knees came up so that her arms could hug around them. “When I got there, the windows were open and he was on the phone with somebody. I don’t know who, but it doesn’t matter, because I’ll never forget what he said.” She swallowed hard. “‘My God, this can’t be happening. You’re joking, right? I kissed my best friend! Ugh, this is the worst thing that could happen.’” With a grimace, she blinked back tears. “I know without a doubt that Josh is the last person on earth who would ever intentionally hurt me. He didn’t know I was there, so he said exactly what he was thinking, and I got the message, loud and clear.”

“Oh, Jen. Did you still go in and talk to him?”

“How could I? I’d just heard him say that kissing me was the worst thing he could’ve done.” She shook her head. “The only reason he’d taken me to the dance in the first place was because my jerk of a boyfriend had dumped me weeks before and Mom called him when nobody else asked me to go. Yes, he’s the best friend I’ve ever had, but hindsight is definitely twenty-twenty, and I know a pity date when I’ve been on one. I’m pretty sure he even tried to tell me so, in a roundabout way.” Her teeth worked over her bottom lip. “The next day, he got on a plane back to Florida while I was at school, even though he was supposed to stay almost another week. He gave up days he could’ve spent with his family just to get away from me, Mags. And he didn’t even really say goodbye, just left a message on my answering machine that he had to go.” The tape on her hand caught the tear that escaped. “Two weeks later, he was dating some girl he’d met in the audience of the show. Andrea was exactly his type: tall, built, tan and photographer ready.”

“Have you ever actually felt yourself changing?” She didn’t wait for a response. “Something about me was different after that. I think … I think I lost some of my joy. I filled three journals that summer and I could tell that some of my spark was gone. I’ve never gotten it back, and I honestly don’t think he ever noticed. It was my birthday before I saw him again, and it took nearly that entire time to make myself feel normal around him again. Or at least as normal as you can be when you’re pining away for something you know you can’t have.” Watery brown eyes came up to meet concerned green. “More than half of the songs on my shelves are for him, whether they’re happy or heartbroken. And he has absolutely no clue, because telling him could ruin everything. So, yes … it’s safe to say that what I want has absolutely no bearing on what happens between us. If more is in the cards, it’ll have to come from him, because I don’t have it in me to be even one of the worst things in his life when he’s so many of the best things in mine.”

“My God, Jen. I had no idea.” That green gaze glanced out the back doors again, watching as JC passed the ball to Justin, who made a three-point shot as the court lights came on in the twilight. Something about Jen’s side of this story just didn’t fit. From what she knew of him, Maggie felt fairly sure in her assessment that JC found Jen to be one of the brightest spots in his world. It was obvious that he went out of his way to be near her, finding ways to touch her, giving her his undivided attention. She’d seen the special smile he reserved just for Jen, knew that sparkle in his eye when he looked at her was a hint at feelings he held close to his heart … but something had obviously gone very wrong somewhere down the road. Biting her lip, she turned back to her friend. “How do you do it? I know I couldn’t.”

“He’s the most important person in the world to me. As needy as it sounds, I’m not me without him.” A small smile curved her lips. “We’ve always been clingy, he flirts with me all the time and I give it right back – no matter how crazy it makes me – so things won’t get awkward. Truth is, I love him and as pathetic as it makes me, I’ll take whatever part of him I can get, for as long as he’s willing. And when he finds the girl who’ll take my place, then I’ll do the best thing for him and let him go. I’ll step aside because I know I’ll be okay as long as she makes him happiest.” She laughed softly. “I guess Brian’s song was a bit of foreshadowing on my part, too, huh?”

“So, then … what? You just carry on like all is well?”

“Exactly. Because in some twisted way, it really is. He’s in my life right now and that’s all I’m going to hope for.” Jen stood from the couch, glancing toward the game outside as she headed to her office. “And since there’s nothing more I can do about him, I figure my efforts right now are probably best spent on being sure I’m not making a huge mistake in signing that contract.”

“I hope you don’t mind that I asked Brian to be here. I’ve read this contract over until I feel like I can recite it. I understand what it says, and I can’t find anything that causes me concern, but I still feel a bit like a fish out of water.” Jen glanced around at the people in the room. “This is moving a little too fast for me to totally understand exactly what’s supposed to be happening right now.”

“What’s happening right now, my dear, is we’re finding out we may have a treasure that we don’t want to lose.” The tall, thin gentleman who had entered the room moments ago leaned forward in his seat. “I’ve listened to each of your demos and not only is it astounding that you’ve completed such a volume of songs at your age, but the number of potential hits you’ve already accumulated is beyond belief.”

“Mr. MacArthur …”

“Please, call me Mac.” His smile was warm and inviting. “Not only am I experienced in the legal side of this business, Jen, but I have a keen ear for what studios and artists are looking for. You already have a gold mine of a portfolio that I can’t wait to shop around. Plus, I’m eagerly anticipating what other material you have to add to it.” He reached down and opened the briefcase that lay beside his chair. “You’ve already got a collection of forty-five lyrical demos with arrangements and fifteen compositions. How many more would you estimate adding this year?”

“This year?” Her brows arched in surprise. “Sir, I’ve been collecting and fine-tuning lyrics and arrangements since I was thirteen. This isn’t even a fraction of what I have ready to demo. And new material is always coming.” Nervous fingers danced over the journal in her lap. “As long as you see me with one of these, I’m either playing with new ideas or finishing out old ones.” She glanced over to Alex. “I’ve already been working on the extended orchestral piece that will be required for Spring Junior Composition and I’m hoping to use it for my Conducting credit as well. If I submit it to you, will I still be able to present it for my classes?”

“Absolutely.” Alex nodded strongly. “Any work that you complete in a university capacity will be eligible for your portfolio to be considered at completion of your program. As long as Brian or one of his trainees acts as your engineer, then you’re clear.”

“And those pieces can be included in this as well?”

“Of course. One portfolio, two purposes.”

“You have to understand, I have no expectations at this point.” Jen bit her lip as she considered her words. “But if I have pieces that are successful, then how am I able to still submit them toward my degree?”

“Because you completed the demos within the parameters required by the university, they must be considered as part of your body of student work.” Mac steepled his fingers and leaned back in his chair. “With Alex as your advisor, you should have no problems whatsoever, but if the university gives you an issue, then that’s where I step in. The legal workings are my expertise. The relationships I have in the network of record labels and the professional connections I possess are simply a bonus that will be used to your advantage.” He sent her a smile. “In fact, I was so confident in the first batch of recordings Alex sent me that I went ahead and put out a few feelers, just to see what the reaction would be. There are three artists ready to sign for recording rights – one in particular needing to move immediately so they can include it on their next project – and at least five more with a serious interest in your work. We just need to get the contracts finalized so I can make good on my word.”

“Three? Already?” Brown eyes widened, darting over to Brian, who was biting his lips to hide his grin. “You don’t seem surprised.”

“Why should I be?” He leaned forward, his hand resting on her shoulder. “I knew you were special with the first verse you recorded. I’ll bet I can even guess which songs they want.”

“You know what? I’m not sure I want to know.” Jen turned her attention back to Mac. “That’s the catch for me. At this point, I want to focus on school. It’s great that this side of it seems to be working out, but if the only involvement I want for now is to simply build my portfolio and be kept up to speed on anything major that happens, are you willing to do all the other work?”

“I already am. In fact, that could be the permanent nature of our relationship, if you prefer.”

“And what’s in it for you? I understand that you’ll receive twenty-five percent of any earnings my portfolio generates, but isn’t that standard?”

“Actually, no.” Mac nodded in her direction. “In the case of most students, I would only withhold ten percent of earnings, with the potential of raising that percentage if a long-term contract was signed upon graduation. Your case is unique, as I anticipated you may wish to be kept apart from the business side of it all. The higher rate is to accommodate for the extra leg work you’ll require. Upon your graduation, you’ll have the option to continue our arrangement with an extended contract, or you may elect to seek representation elsewhere.”

“Okay.” She nodded. “That’s fair.”

“There may be instances, of course, where the artist or producer requests your presence – if they’re interested in not only the lyrics but the arrangement, they may want you there for the recording process to provide input. Should that occur, you’ll need to make an appearance, which could mean travel.” Clearing his throat, he continued. “And there’s not just potential for contracted artist interest. Film studios will also occasionally send out requests for demos, looking for music to fit their soundtracks. There may be times where I email you a synopsis of a movie in production, just to see if you can come up with something to submit for consideration. You won’t be required to respond to those, but I do encourage you to give it serious thought. Film work can be quite profitable.”

“You’ve thought of everything haven’t you?” A grin spread quickly, followed by a quiet laugh.

“That’s my job, Jen. Anticipate even what seems impossible.”

“I like that. And I think I like you, Mac.” She took a deep, cleansing breath as her anxiety melted away. “Where do I need to sign?”

----------------------------------------

September 1, 1995

“Okay, does that get it?”

“Yep, that’s the last one.” Brian took the disc from the burner and wrote the title in black Sharpie. “I really liked that, too, even if it’ll probably end up in a chick flick someday.” He laughed. “So, who’s the lucky guy that’s striking up the band and making the fireflies dance?”

“Right now? Nobody.” She grinned and took off the headphones, walking over to push through the door. “When I was in high school, though … have you ever gone on one of those dates that made you all dreamy and left you hoping for more?”

“Not lately, but yeah, I can remember that.”

“Well, I had one that was almost that kind of special. It kind of stuck with me, even if it didn’t go anywhere.” Sighing, she picked up her bag, reaching out to begin fitting in all the discs and arrangements she’d be delivering to Alex’s office. “Speaking of going, I think I’m gonna drop these off and start my weekend early. I’ve got my hours in at the center for this week, all my class work is already done and the only thing I’ve got going on between now and Tuesday is that ‘know your neighbors’ thing my neighborhood is sponsoring Saturday night.”

“Ah, yeah. All the university areas have something like that going on for the Labor Day weekend.” He reached around to cut the power to the board and equipment. “It’s really just an excuse for most of the guys to get together and drink.”

“That’s what I figured.” She shook her head. “I’ve invited some friends over and my housemate is bringing some of her drama friends. I can’t decide if I want to fire up the grill for burgers or just have some pizzas delivered.” Thinking over the mess likely to follow, she laughed. “Pizzas, definitely.” Her gaze jumped over to him as she zipped up her bag and slid it over her shoulder. “You should join us.”

“I’ve got a few housemates myself. Probably shouldn’t just leave them hanging.”

“Bring them with you. No alcohol, since the majority of us are underage and I’m not really that kind of partier, but the guys will probably be playing most of the time, anyway. You’d fit right in.”

“Playing?”

“Yep. Basketball, air hockey, pool, darts. I’ve even got a few game systems and a big screen TV.” And Maggie’s gonna love meeting you. Her teeth bit the inside of her lip, hiding her smile. “And plenty of food. A college guy’s paradise.”

“You’re sure you wouldn’t mind a few extra?” He arched a brow as he locked the door behind them. “Mark’s out of town for the long weekend, but Adam – you know, from downstairs – and Nick tend to be slightly excitable.”

“You haven’t met my bunch yet.” Another laugh escaped as they headed for the elevator. “Like I said, you’ll fit right in. The more, the merrier.”

“Well, thanks. Which neighborhood are you in?” She rattled off her address and he turned to look at her. “Really? That’s not even two blocks from my place. You’ve got the house that always has a bunch of cars in front and a court in the back, right?”

“That’s me. The rotating door for future pop stars and drama queens.” They stepped in when the elevator doors opened with a ding. “Home sweet home. It’s definitely never boring.” Glancing his way, she pressed the button for the main floor. “We’re getting started around seven, food delivered a little after.”

“I’ll be there for sure. You might want to plan on the others, but I’m not going to swear to them.”

“Perfect.” She sent a wave to Adam as they passed through the lobby and out into the bright sunshine. “See you then.”

*********************

Jen was taking a pan of hot bean dip out of the oven when the doorbell rang. “Can somebody get that?” As she put the pan on the table, she took a quick glance around to make sure someone was headed for the door, then turned back to the kitchen to collect the platter of boneless chicken wings she’d prepared that afternoon. “Thanks, Spazz. If it’s the pizza, I’ll be there in a minute.”

“Okay.” He jogged down the front hallway when the bell pealed again and pulled open the door to find three college-aged guys on the front porch. “Hey, can I help you?”

“Yeah, hi.” The tallest one sent him a grin. “I’m hoping I’ve got the right place. Jen invited us.”

“Oh, right. She said we may have a few more.” He stepped aside, motioning them by. “Come on in. We’ve already got a crowd, but there’s plenty of room.” As they made their way toward the main rooms, he called out. “Hey, Jenny! We’ve got a few more!”

“Be right there!”

“I’m Chris.” Noticing JC leaning against the wall, looking toward the staircase and shaking his head, Chris nodded his direction. “And this is JC.”

“Brian.” He gestured over his shoulder. “Adam and Nick. I guess you could say we’re classmates of Jen’s.”

“Ahh … Smoothie shop guy turned recording guy. We’ve heard a lot about you.” JC smiled and shook his hand. “Nice to meet you. The demos are sounding great.” He jerked a thumb toward the teenager studying the banister at the top of the stairs. “That’s Justin. For the next few minutes, anyway. If she lets him live.”

“Whoa. Wicked Strat, guys.” Nick had moved into Jen’s practice area, his fingers touching the polished instrument reverently. “Which one of you plays?”

“That would be Jen.” Blue eyes widened as JC watched Justin throw a leg over the banister, preparing to slide down. “The kid’s about to die.”

“She’s got an electric?” One brow arched skeptically as Nick shook his head. “So, it’s just for decoration, then. Right?”

Chris coughed back a laugh. “Man, don’t let her hear you say that.”

“Justin Timberlake, if you fall off that banister and break my piano, there won’t be enough of you left for your mother to identify. Get. Down. Now.” She stepped around the corner, glaring at Justin as he grinned sheepishly and came back down the staircase on foot. Once he was out of sight, she sighed and turned to the group who had just arrived with a smile. “Sorry. Welcome to the jungle. Hi, Brian, Adam.” Her gaze skipped over to where her guitars were being admired. “And we haven’t met. Nick, right?”

“Yeah. Nice to meet you, Jen.” He smiled, gesturing toward her instruments. “Cool set up.”

“Thanks.” She sent a glance in Chris’ direction. “Don’t let me hear who say what?”

“Well, Nick was just wondering about your Strat.” Adam spoke up, ignoring the warning look Brian was giving him and sending an evil grin toward his other housemate. “He seems to think it’s an excellent decoration choice.”

“Decoration, huh?” Her tone was neutral as she moved over next to JC, meeting his amused expression with a ghost of a smile. “She is pretty, isn’t she?”

“Definitely.”

“Hey, what’s going on?” Joey walked up to stand beside Chris, watching as Jen chatted casually with Nick, moving around him so that he had to step back between JC and Brian in order to see her.

“Challenge accepted.” Chris laughed under his breath. “Our little Jenny is about to show out to the new guy.”

Lifting the Strat from its stand, her lips curved slightly as she made sure the strap was adjusted correctly before sliding it over her neck and leaning down to plug in to the amplifier at her feet, keeping the volume on the lower side of blaring. “You know, Nick, there’s a reason most guitars are referred to in a feminine tense.” She slid her finger guards in place and selected a pick from the collection laying on the piano, strumming a quick warm up chord. “They react just like women. If you treat her well, you might get to first base … maybe Smoke on the Water.” A few bars of the riff flowed from the amp as her hands cradled the instrument. “Or Money for Nothing might be more your speed.”

As the melody changed, Maggie came over to join the crowd, grinning when she saw her friend giving a determined but friendly smile to a group of guys as she worked skillfully over the strings. “Awesome. You school ’em, Jen.”

“That’s nice and all, but most guys like to make it to second base, at least. Put in a little extra effort and you might get Walk This Way.” She switched songs effortlessly, not even glancing down to adjust as she nodded her head, her body grooving to the rhythm. “Third base? Sweet Child O’ Mine.”

“Would you look at that?” Chris nudged Maggie with his elbow, pointing out the slightly dazed expression on Nick’s face as he watched her tackle the difficult riff. “Dude just fell in love.”

“Whatever good that’ll do him.” The redhead nodded toward a grinning JC, who was obviously enjoying the little demonstration. “Poor guy doesn’t stand a chance.”

“Home base … now that takes work. Personally, I kind of missed the draw to the whole hairband, glam rock thing. But there were still a few gems.” Her fingers changed position, picking out the familiar lead in. “It may not be the most impressive of riffs, but the Top Gun Anthem is everything a girl wants – steady, warm, slow and building to the excitement toward the end.” She let the guitar scream through the promised crescendo, then let the piece end and moved to lift the strap back over her neck.

As she turned off the amp, the doorbell rang again and she straightened with a smile, reaching into her pocket for the cash for the pizza delivery and patting Nick’s shoulder as she walked by. “But if you really want to just let her sit there and be decoration, then all the power to you.” Turning quickly, she motioned toward Maggie. “Maggie, this is Brian. Brian, Maggie.” With a quick wink in her direction, Jen gestured toward the crowd in the living room. “Why don’t you introduce him, Adam and Nick around? Maybe get a drink. Pizza in a few minutes.” Her gaze landed on JC. “Care to give me a hand? I’m sure I ordered too much.”

“Uh huh.” He laughed as he followed her down the hallway. “That wasn’t obvious at all.”

“What?” Her expression was innocent as she opened the door and nodded at the delivery girl. “Thanks. Keep the change.”

Taking four of the boxes, he turned to hold the door for her to go ahead of him. “Maggie and Brian.”

“Oh, just you wait.” She grinned over her shoulder, a twinkle lighting her eyes. “They’re perfect for each other. Give them some time and I’ll be two for two.”

“Really? Matt finally called Amber?”

“More than once, apparently. Judging by the dreamy look she’s had this week and the hug she gave me as I was leaving Thursday, I’d say she’s kind of excited about their date tonight.” Setting a stack of boxes on the table next to the dishes she’d just put out, she turned in the direction of Maggie’s laughter, smiling when she saw her sitting on one of the couches with Brian. “I don’t think it’ll take so long with these two.”

“I always knew you were a real softie, but you’re leveling up, aren’t you?” He shook his head with a grin, putting an arm around her shoulders and pulling her close to his side.

“I just want everybody to be happy.” Looking up, her eyes met his as she let herself lean into him. “Is there something wrong with that?”

“Not at all, Boof.” He dropped a kiss on the top of her head, then turned his attention to the couple on the couch, his brow creasing slightly as he cleared his throat and tightened his arm around her. “But what about you? Don’t you want somebody, too?”

“Well, yeah. Of course I do.” She could feel her heart sink a little bit as her gaze moved over his profile. “I figure I’ll know it when I find him.” And if I can’t have him, then I’ll just have to take what I can get.

----------------------------------------

October 3, 1995

The bell above the door jingled as JC pushed it open, his eyes immediately sweeping over the crowded restaurant. College students filled the booths and larger tables, textbooks and laptop computers scattered across most of the tabletops. The aroma of burgers, fries and caffeine-laden drinks filled the air, encouraging his stomach to growl with hunger.

It took a minute, but his gaze finally found familiar brown hair, falling forward to hide her face as she leaned over the notebook spread open next to a stack of books on the vinyl table, her hand moving quickly, her pencil making short strokes as she marked against the paper. A waitress stopped by the booth and he could feel a little skip in his chest when Jen grinned brightly up at her. Two drinks were set on the table, the girls making small talk and laughing as the waitress made a few notes on her order pad, then headed back toward the kitchen, Jen turning her attention back to her work.

He shook his head with a smile, then pushed through the maze of bodies and chairs to drop down into the seat across from her. “Hey, Boof.”

“Hey.” Without even glancing up, she passed a drink over to him. “How did rehearsals go? You guys got an early start this morning.”

“We’ve got three new numbers we’re working on. Between yesterday and this morning, I can barely move.” There was a pause as he took a sip of soda. “But I think we’re finally getting it down. Even Lance.”

“Good for him.” She smiled, tearing her attention from the page to finally focus on him. “He just needs to loosen up a little bit. Poor kid’s wound so tight all the time ...” The sentence died away, brown eyes darkening thoughtfully for just a second before a quiet laugh escaped. “So, things are good?”

“Better than good. Lou got us a booking at Pleasure Island toward the end of this month.”

“Really?” Her face brightened as she let the pencil fall to the table. “Your first real gig?”

“Something like that, yeah. We’ve got a showcase spot on the 22nd, so he’s really pushing us to have a solid set performance ready. And he mentioned bringing out a few potential managers to shop us to.”

“That’s awesome!” The exclamation brought a few stares their way, but she didn’t care. “Am I invited?”

“You’d better be there. Who else can keep us all in check?” He laughed, his stomach rumbling again. “I’m starving.”

“I’ve already ordered.” She checked her watch, then looked back to the book she’d been writing in. “They should have it out pretty soon. Cheeseburger and fries okay?”

“Sounds great.” His eyes began skimming around her hand, his brows lifting as he studied the chords scribbled across the staff paper. “What’s this?”

“Maggie’s in a quartet this term and she asked if I had anything they could use as a warm-up piece.”

“Really?”

“Yeah.” Her fingers combed through her hair. “I already had a few things that would work, so Brian suggested I work out the harmonies for female voices.”

“That’s cool.” Tilting his head, he looked more closely at her work. “How’s it coming?”

“I’m to the point where I’ll have to put it on hold until I can get to my piano.” White teeth worked over her lower lip. “It’ll go a lot faster when I can play it out so I can hear the parts and get them just how I want them.”

His eyebrow arched as he leaned back in his seat. “Yeah, and it probably doesn’t help that you’re a perfectionist, either.” A sheepish shrug lifted her shoulders, a smile pulling at her lips, and he laughed, stretching his arms above his head. “Maybe you could let us use something of yours. Scales and chord harmonies get boring after a while.”

“Sure. It’s not original, but I was playing with a cool acapella arrangement of Sailing the other day. I could add a few parts … you guys would sound awesome on it.” She started packing her books into her bag, clearing off a large portion of the table. “Or I just finished up the lead on Here and Now. Wouldn’t take much to add harmonies to it.”

“We’re game for anything you have for us, Boof.” He gestured toward her overstuffed bag. “What’s with all the books? Are you carrying extra?”

“Yeah.” Nodding, she picked up the pencil and began tapping the eraser against her notebook. “I’ve decided to try testing out of my General Ed courses.”

“Really? Why?”

“I thought more of what I took back home would transfer, but the course requirements didn’t match, so I can’t count those for credit.” A sigh escaped. “With the exception of my Spanish credits and introductory music classes, I’m really starting over as a Freshman. I lucked out this past summer by getting to take the three classes they offered, because core credit courses aren’t normally offered during the summer term. They don’t always offer elective courses that will count for me, either, but if I’m able to enroll in two or three classes every summer, I’d finally graduate with the spring class of 2000.” She shook her head, dropping the pencil. “I don’t want to wait that long and I’d really like to have my summers mostly free. If I can test out, it’ll really lighten up my course load per semester. Even with the extra lab time required for my degree, I’d be able to arrange my schedule so I have more free time during the week.” Her gaze met his. “I’ve talked it over with Professor Summers, and she thinks that if I test out and take a self-study elective each summer, I’ll only have to enroll in one extra term to catch the last two required courses and complete my Senior project. I’ll finish up with Maggie in winter of 1998.”

“You’d earn your degree in three years?” He studied her carefully. “That sounds intense, Jenny. Are you sure you’re up for that? When would you be testing?”

“The fall test is in six weeks and I can still sign up for it. It’s not a lot of time to prepare, but it’ll be next April before they test again. Considering how much easier it would make things, I think it’s worth it to see if I can pass this time around.”

“Just as long as you don’t overdo it. Remember what you promised me?”

“I remember. I’ll be fine, I promise. I stopped by the Student Center and picked up the outline of the tested subjects and they all look like basic topics. I’m really only worried about the science part.” She grimaced. “You know I’ve always hated anything even remotely related to science. If I fail one section, I fail it all, and I’d hate for that one thing to keep me behind.”

“Ask around. Maggie, Brian or one of the others might can help you out.” He shook his head with a laugh. “Or maybe you should just write little songs about everything you aren’t sure of. You remember more lyrics than anybody I’ve ever met. It’s insane.” His attention jumped to a waiter slowly loading plates onto a tray and turning their direction. “I think our food is coming.”

“Good.” She flipped the notebook closed and shoved it and the pencil into her bag, taking a look toward the kitchen. “Oh, God.”

“What?”

Twisting around quickly, she paused for only a brief second before reaching across the table and grabbing his hand, lacing her fingers through his. “Play along, okay?”

Distracted by the feel of her hand in his, his gaze fixed to where she touched him. The realization of how perfectly their fingers fit together registered briefly before he tore his focus back to her and widened his eyes. “Uh …”

“Just pretend for five minutes that you can’t live without me.” Brown eyes begged him as the waiter quickly approached. “Please?”

No problem. He shook his head slightly, brows arching questioningly. “Okay, but what …” His voice trailed off as she pasted a bright smile on her face and turned toward the guy who’d just stopped by their table, trying desperately to balance the tray of food as he attempted to fix the little white hat that refused to stay put on his curly black hair.

“Hi, Jen.” The tray teetered precariously in his hand before he finally propped it against the tabletop, leaving the hat askew so he could distribute the plates.

“Hi, Mark.” She eyed him warily as he leaned over her. “How are you?”

“I’ve had better days.” His stare was fixed to their linked hands as the ceramic dishes clattered down, then green eyes turned to clash with blue. “This must be JC.”

“Yes. Josh, this is Mark Stillman.” Her head tilted as she made the introduction, not worrying that neither was paying her any attention. “Mark is Brian’s last housemate. We’re in the same guitar ensemble and Music History class this term.”

“I see.” When he felt her fingers squeeze his, he reached out with his free hand. “Nice to meet you, man.”

“I’ve heard a lot about you. I was sorry that I missed the party Labor Day weekend. The guys all seemed to have a blast.” The waiter had a firm grasp, exchanging a quick shake before shifting his gaze to Jen. “Your girlfriend here can do some wicked things with the strings. She’s taught me quite a bit.”

Girlfriend? Astonished, JC switched his attention to her, amusement settling in when he saw her posture stiffening, the faint blush creeping onto her cheeks betraying her discomfort. His teeth clamped down on the inside of his cheek, forcing himself not to break into a grin as his eyes widened inquisitively. “Really?”

“No, not really.” She shook her head in denial, expertly masking the pleading look that crossed over her features. “I’ve just shown him a few easy tricks. Nothing major.”

“Stop being modest.” Mark laughed, resting a hand on her shoulder, never looking away from her as he spoke in a strong Southern drawl toward JC. “The only playing I’ve ever done is country-western and she had me strumming out Spanish style in less than a month.”

A dark eyebrow arched slightly in consideration of the ‘please-pay-attention-to-me’ expression etched across Mark’s face as he stared at Jen, eyes darkened with what could only be longing. His heart twisted painfully, and JC forced his gaze back on her, relief rushing through him when he saw her discomfort with the attention from her classmate. Letting out a silent sigh, he squeezed her fingers with a soft smile. “You don’t have to sing her praises to me.” Without missing a beat, he lifted their hands, pressing his lips across her knuckles. “I know exactly how amazing she is.”

For a moment, she simply stared at him, an odd mixture of emotions playing in her eyes until the grip on her shoulder tightened in a quick squeeze.

“Well, I should probably get back to the kitchen. Lindsay was covered up for a little bit, but she’ll be by in a while to see if you guys need anything.” The hat was straightened one last time as he finally released her and tucked the tray under his arm. “I’ll see you in class tonight?”

“Yep. See you later.” Forcing another smile, she popped a fry into her mouth, chewing quickly to distract herself from both pairs of male eyes.

“Great.” His gaze leveled on JC once again before he turned away. “Hold tight to this one, man. She’s a keeper.”

As his footsteps faded away behind her, she groaned softly, covering her face with her free hand. “Is he gone?”

“He’s gone.”

“My God.” Her fingers released his, coming up to better hide the scarlet coloring flaring up from her neck. “That was …”

“So, how long have we been dating?” Laughter laced his voice as he picked up a fry of his own. “And is there anything else I should know about us?”

“A little over a year.” The tips of her ears turned an amazingly fiery color and she shook her head, still refusing to look at him. “I didn’t know he was working here, or I wouldn’t have … I’m sorry, Josh.”

“Hey, no problem. Any particular reason why you’re using me?”

Her hands came away from her face, fingers fidgeting as she took a quick look back toward the kitchen. “He wouldn’t stop badgering me to go out with him.”

“Well, what’s wrong with that?” He glanced down, picking up his burger before focusing back on her, forcing a neutral tone. “He seems like a nice guy. He’s in some of your classes and he obviously likes you.”

“Yeah, he does. To the point of irritation.” With a deep sigh, she shook her head as she played with the saltshaker. “He’s okay in small doses, but there’s something about him that hits me the wrong way. He’s not …” You. She barely kept the word from escaping. “I’m just not feeling it.” Her shoulders shrugged. “But Brian’s already warned me that if I do any work with him over the summer, Mark is one of his studio guys. I’m not going to be able to avoid him, so I really didn’t want to insult him … and I was too nice to tell him that I don’t want to be more than friends.”

“So you lied to him instead?”

“Yeah. Adam and Nick already thought we were together, so I didn’t correct them, but Brian knows the truth. He’s been sworn to secrecy.” Tearing her eyes away from the thick glass between her fingers, she watched him chew slowly. “I was going to keep it up until he found somebody else, then we were going to break up.”

“Is that so?” His eyebrow arched again, teasingly this time. “And whose fault would that have been?”

“Like I’d ever have it in me to walk away from you.” Her tone lifted, hiding laughter. “A tall, blonde and gorgeous Lit major from FSU was going to steal you away, leaving me devastated but strong enough to move on with life.”

He was quiet, his gaze trailing over her slowly as she began to eat, her features bright with humor. “You know me better than that, Boof. Blondes don’t do it for me. Brunettes …” He reached across the table until he could twirl a lock of her dark hair around his fingers. “Brunettes hit me where it hurts. And do you really think you’re the only one who wouldn’t be able to walk away?”

The breath caught in her chest and she had to swallow hard to get the bite to go down as her eyes met his. For a moment, he only smiled softly and played with her hair, then a playful wink was sent her way and he turned back to his food.

You can’t have him, Jen. Closing her eyes, she inhaled deeply and gave a slight shake of her head. Lord, help me.

----------------------------------------

October 22, 1995

“Fifteen minutes!”

She joined them as they gathered at the side of the stage, checking equipment and bouncing in anticipation. “Okay, guys, I’m heading out front and getting out of the way. You’re gonna be fantastic.”

“That’s it?” Joey sent a surprised glance her direction. “I’m disappointed, Hot Stuff.”

“Disappointed?” Her brow creased in confusion. “In what?”

“You.” He grinned, gesturing her direction. “I expected more than just a ‘you’ll be great, see ya’. What kind of good luck charm are you, anyway?”

“Oh.” She rolled her eyes. “What more can I do, Joe Bear? Double-knot your shoelaces?”

“How about hugs?” Chris took his place at the foot of the stairs, smiling as he spread his arms open. “Yours always seem to have just a little bit of magic in them.”

“Magic. Right.” Laughing, she moved into his embrace, reaching her arms up and around his neck. “You don’t need magic, Spazz. They’re gonna love you no matter what.”

“Having you in our corner is a definite plus.” He kissed her cheek before pulling away. “You’re the perfect cheerleader.”

“Sure.” She stepped over to Joey, who was wiggling his eyebrows suggestively. “What now?”

“Cheerleader, huh?” He leaned down and wrapped his arms around her waist, pulling her off her feet and against his chest. “Does that mean we get the skirt, pom-poms and everything?”

“Oh, shut up.” With a groan, she punched him playfully on the shoulder, then hugged him in return. “You have no idea what it would take to get me in a cheerleader skirt, Joe … and you never will.”

“But I can fantasize, can’t I?” Laughing, he set her back to her feet, his eyes crinkling with his smile. “A guy has to dream, Jenny.”

“You just keep right on doing that.” Shaking her head, she turned to look up at Justin. “All right, kiddo … your turn.” Holding her arms out to her sides, she closed her eyes and prepared to leave the ground again. “Hit me with it.”

“Wow.” He chuckled and surprised her by coming down to her level, bending at the waist until she could reach his neck. “You have no faith in me, Shorty.”

“It’s not that. I’ve just never been very good at flying.” Her fingers ruffled his hair before she hugged him tightly. “And you’re already trying to give the Jolly Green Giant a real run for his money. At least, in comparison to me.”

“You’re not really all that short.” His eyes widened when he straightened up, paying attention to how far off the ground she came. “Wow. Okay … how tall are you?”

“Four foot eleven. Haven’t grown an inch since the eighth grade. I prayed every night for a growth spurt during high school, but I guess I took after my dad’s side. None of them appear to be very tall in the photos I’ve seen.”

“Well, you have more than enough spunk to make up for it.” A grin lit his features. “Our very own Mighty Mouse.”

“Ha ha. Very funny.” She laughed, turning her head to speak softly. “Knock ’em dead, J.”

“You bet, Jenny.” He winked, then leaned down and released her, moving closer to where Chris and Joey were waiting to run up the stairs and allowing her to focus on a very shaky Lance.

“You’re nervous, but it’s going to be fine, I promise.” She gave him an encouraging smile before he could pull her to him almost desperately. “Just remember what Jake and Sam were teaching you.”

“But what if …” His deep voice was muffled by her hair.

“Hey, push comes to shove, just follow along and keep singing.” Her hand made comforting circles on his back. “Nobody out there knows what your routines are supposed to be, anyway.” Pulling back a little, she let her eyes meet his. “Have fun today, Lance. You’ve worked so hard these past few months for this. Don’t let fear keep you from giving your best performance. You’re so good at what you do. Now go show out to everybody. Okay?”

“Yeah.” He nodded and took a deep breath, determination erasing the terror he’d been trembling with as he moved away. “Thanks, Girlie.” A smile broke across his face before he laughed softly. “Your hugs really do have a little magic in them, don’t they?”

“For you? Absolutely.” She laughed, turning to face a grinning JC. “What?”

“You.” He kissed her forehead, then wrapped her up in his arms. “You’re incredible, you know.”

“I’m incredibly something, that’s for sure.” As her feet left the ground again, she took a steadying breath and hugged him tightly around the neck, hiding her face in his shoulder. “I’m so proud of you, Josh.”

“We haven’t done anything yet.” A chuckle escaped and he began swaying from side to side. “Tell me again when it’s over.”

“Five minutes!”

“Okay, I really should go find Lynn. She’s saving me a spot so I can get a good video.” She grinned as he lowered her to her feet. “I promised your mom I wouldn’t miss anything.” Going on her toes, she pressed her lips to his cheek. “Have fun. I’ll meet you back here after.”

“See you later.” Another quick squeeze and he let her go, watching as she grabbed her camcorder bag and jogged toward the front of the stage. Exhaling raggedly, he turned toward the others, picking up a microphone and hopping in place a little bit, ignoring the knowing looks Chris and Justin were sending his way.

It took her a moment to locate Lynn, and she had to work her way through the crowd to get to her. “Wow.” Eyes widening at the number of people gathered in front of the stage, she draped the bag’s strap over her shoulder and glanced at Justin’s mom. “Do they always have a crowd like this?”

“I don’t know. I’ve never been to one of these.” Lynn laughed, reaching out to take the bag from her. “Here, let me hold that. How are they?”

“Good.” Jen unzipped the bag and took out the small camcorder, tightening the strap to secure it to her hand. “Lance needed a pep talk, but I think they’re ready.” She centered the stage on her viewing screen and pressed Record just as the emcee began introducing the group. “I guess we’re about to find out.”

They hit the opening harmony perfectly, and she couldn’t help but cheer when the crowd began grooving with them fairly early into the first number. By the second verse, they’d visibly relaxed, smiling at each other as they moved across the stage, beginning to enjoy themselves. The crowd cheered encouragingly as the song came to an end, waiting with anticipation for the second number to begin.

“They’re really good, aren’t they?”

“Oh, they’re better than good.” Jen turned toward the voice beside her, meeting the smile of a taller black man in a baseball cap. “Just wait until you hear them when they focus on harmony. They all love to entertain, but I’m hoping they put at least one slower number in their set. That’s where their heart is.”

“Really?” His focus came to her, interest lighting his features. “Are you with the group?”

“You could say that. I was appointed group cheerleader about twenty minutes ago.” She laughed. “I didn’t think it’d be polite to turn them down.”

“Of course not.” He turned back to watch the show, nodding as the song ended and the group came together in the middle of the stage. “This would be the perfect spot for a breather …”

She zoomed the camera in so she could frame all of them in the shot, her gaze jumping over to Lynn when they began the familiar acapella tune. “Really? Did you know they were going to do Sailing?”

“Justin told me to keep it a surprise.” The older woman smiled warmly at her. “They love the arrangement you worked up for them, and I have to say that it’s my favorite, too.”

“Wow. It sounds even better than it did when they were learning it.” She noticed the entire group looking directly at her and grinned widely, giving them a wave and a thumbs up. “They’re the sweetest …”

“Did I just hear that you arranged this for them?” The man was still beside her, his attention on her once again. “How did that come about?”

“I’m studying Music Comp at UCF and was working out some warm-up pieces for an ensemble on campus.” She gestured toward the stage. “JC – the one in the middle – and I have been best friends since we were kids, so he asked if I had anything they could use. I guess you could say you’re watching the end result.”

“Impressive.” A thoughtful expression on his face, he nodded and glanced back toward the stage. “The voices and the arrangement. You were right. This is where their heart is.” He held out a hand in her direction. “Johnny Wright.”

“Jen Lawson.” Carefully, she reached her free hand over to grasp his, trying her best to keep the camera from bouncing. “Nice to meet you. Do you come to these showcases often?”

“Only when I’m invited.” Johnny grinned as the song ended, generating screams from the girls who’d moved forward, trying to get closer to the stage. “I’ll be honest … I almost backed out of this one. Something tells me I’m going to be very glad I didn’t.” He watched her adjust the settings on her camcorder as the next up-tempo number began. “Doubly glad. Enjoy the rest of the show.”

“Thanks. You too.” She sent him a smile before he walked away, heading for the area over by the side of the stage opposite from where the guys had been getting ready. “Well, he was nice.” Glancing over to Lynn, her brow furrowed slightly. “Did you know him?”

“Nope.” Lynn shook her head. “I thought maybe you knew him from school.”

“No, I don’t think I’ve ever seen him on campus.” Jen shrugged, puzzled, then turned back to focus on the last three songs of the set. “They’re going to be so excited after this. I don’t think it could’ve gone better.”

The guys landed in their last positions, then jumped up and began slapping hands with some of the people closest to the stage, calling out thanks and appreciation as they headed back toward the stairs they’d run up thirty minutes before.

“Here.” Lynn handed her the bag and began to steer her out of the way. “We should probably head their way before we get trampled.”

It took a little while, but they finally pushed through the crowd and to the side of the stage where the group was waiting. Jen couldn’t help but smile when she saw them posing for photos, various family members and one of the park employees trying to get a good shot before they scattered.

“Hey, Shorty! Get over here!” She was just setting down her bag when Justin called over the noise. “Group picture!”

Her arms crossed over her chest as she turned to look at the grinning bunch. “It looks to me like the group is already there. Why do you need me?”

“Come on, Jen. Don’t make us send Jace after you.” Joey’s eyes lit with amusement. “You know you can’t tell him no.”

“It’ll look awesome on your wall of fame.” JC smiled, already moving to her and taking her hand, pulling her with him. “It’s just one photo, Boof. Please?”

“I’m so much shorter than you guys …” The protest died when she saw the others moving to sit on the stairs, making a spot for her in the middle. “And you’ve already thought of that.” She sighed, looking up at him. “I don’t get to say no, do I?”

“Nope.” He laughed, lifting her up the impossibly steep staircase so she could take a seat between Chris and Lance before sitting down in front of her. “Just think, you can leave it hanging as proof that you were here when it all started.”

“All right, guys. It looks great, but you need to squeeze in so you all fit.” Lance’s mother, Diane, smiled from behind her camera as they all started shifting, Chris and Lance scooting in next to her, Justin and Joey hunkering down on the stair behind. Jen moved her legs to the side so JC could switch from sitting to kneeling, one arm draping across her thighs to steady himself. She wrapped an arm around his shoulders, pulling him back to lean against her and his hand came up, his fingers closing loosely around her forearm. “That’s got it! Hold it!” A few clicks later, she was satisfied. “Perfect!”

As they stood, Lance leaned over to give her a tight hug. “Thanks, Jen. For everything.”

“You are most welcome.” She smiled, turning her head and lowering her voice so that only he could hear. “You were amazing. Never doubt yourself. Okay?”

“Yeah.” He nodded with a grin, then released her and followed the others in jumping down the stairs to scatter among their family members, leaving her to maneuver the ladder-like staircase on her own.

“Seriously?” A sigh escaped as she judged the distance down, determining she wouldn’t land a jump as easily as they had. “What a bunch of vertically blessed punks.”

“Come on.” JC returned to the side of the stairs, chuckling at her predicament. “I’ve got you.”

“Yeah, right.” She moved closer to him, smiling a little when he had to look up at her. “This is different. I’ve never been taller than you. Feels powerful.”

“I’m sure it does.” A playful twinkle sparked in his eyes as he wrapped one arm around her thighs, the other going around her midsection as he pulled her off the stair and against his chest, letting her slide down as he worked out a more secure grip on her. “Did you enjoy the show?”

“It was wonderful.” Her hands framed his face as she rested her forehead against his. “I’m so proud of you, Josh.” She smiled as he stretched up to kiss her cheek. “And thank you for including Sailing. It sounded better than I ever hoped it would.”

“We had a hard time deciding between it and Here and Now.” His hold loosened as he leaned down, her feet finally touching the ground. “But Sailing is your favorite, so it won.”

“There are my boys!” Lou’s voice carried over the commotion as he came around the back side of the stage, Johnny Wright following on his heels. “Fantastic show, kids!”

JC looked down when he felt Jen withdraw, her happiness shuttering into a wary expression, her hand lightly touching his back as she nearly hid behind him at the large man’s approach. His arm went around her, pulling her protectively against his side, before letting his attention turn back to their benefactor.

“Gather around, folks. I’ve got someone you need to meet.” Once he had everyone’s attention, Lou clapped a hand over Johnny’s shoulder. “This is Johnny Wright, of Wright Entertainment Group. You were better than ever tonight, boys … and you’ve impressed this man right here. Say hello to your new manager.”

“You guys were better than impressive. You showed heart.” Johnny let his gaze move over everyone in the crowd, stopping when he found Jen, a smile crossing his features at the sight of her underneath JC’s arm. Her eyes widened in recognition, and she nodded at him, then grinned when he sent her a wink. “Heart is what it takes to make it in this business. Lots of heart and even more hard work. I’ll work hard for you, if you’ll work hard for me.” He seemed to make a point by stepping away from Lou. “I’ve already got a few labels in mind to shop this group to and as soon as I can get some meetings set up, we’ll get started. Be prepared to go to auditions in the next few weeks.” A murmur of excited chatter began to spread. “This is just the beginning, boys. Things are about to get exciting.”

November 2, 1995

“Okay, guys. Call it a night. I’ll see you in my office at ten, then we’ll head over to BMG. You’re scheduled with them at noon, so we’ll do a quick run through, then take our time getting there.” Johnny gave them a nod as he headed up the stairs, Matt following on his heels. “Get some rest, boys.” As he pushed the door open and stepped into the hallway, Johnny looked down and stopped in his tracks, puzzled by the cooler blocking the front door. Moving closer, he found two smaller bags sitting on top – one labeled with his name, the other with Matt’s. “What’s this?”

“What?” Matt leaned around him to take a look. “Jace wasn’t kidding. She really is a mama bear.” A quiet laugh escaped. “I’m betting that’s our dinner.”

“Mama bear?” Johnny’s brow arched as he glanced at the choreographer. “Who’s a mama bear?”

“Jen. She has this habit of taking care of everybody. Giving us the studio to work in, feeding us, arranging help for Lance, letting them invade her space whenever they need to relax. She even set me up with my girlfriend.” Leaning down, Matt picked up the note anchored to the cooler and smiled, reading out loud as the others gathered in the hallway behind him. “I know it’s late, but you’ve got a busy day tomorrow. Take it with you and eat at least a little bit tonight. I’d wish you good luck on the audition, but this one’s going to be it. Just do your thing and they’ll love you.”

“Oh, man. What’d she fix?” Joey nodded at Johnny. “Open it up and let’s see.”

“She really doesn’t have to feed me.” The older man shook his head as he picked up the bag and unzipped it, groaning when he saw what was inside. “Ham salad. Sandwiches and some extra with crackers. Looks like the good stuff, too. Man, I haven’t had a good ham salad since my gram passed on.” His fingers tugged at a Ziplock bag tucked to the side. “And cookies. Peanut butter, I think.”

“She must’ve found the recipe she was looking for.” Chris smiled, turning to look down the hallway toward the dim lighting in the main rooms. “Hey, Jace, isn’t her test tomorrow, too?”

“Yeah. She was stressing earlier. I guess she thought cooking would be a good distraction.” JC walked away from the front door, pausing to slide his duffel toward the doorway of the downstairs bedroom. “Will you guys fit in your car, or do you need my Jeep? I’m gonna stay here and meet up with you in the morning.”

“We can fit in mine.” Chris took the keys out of his pocket and tossed them to Lance. “You guys load up. I’ll be there in a minute.” He sent a wave to Johnny and Matt as they walked out the door, then made his way after JC, following him into the kitchen. “You sound worried. Is she okay?”

“I’m sure she is. It’s just … this test is so important to her and she didn’t even have a full six weeks to study for it. I don’t want her to psych herself out.” A tired sigh floated through the semi-darkness as he opened the refrigerator and reached for a bottle of water, laughing quietly when he found the covered plate of food with a note for him on it. “And it actually scares me a little that she knows me so well.” He put the plate on the counter, grinning at Chris as he read the folded paper. “That means you, too, Josh. Water doesn’t cut it after the day you’ve had. Stop worrying about my test, eat at least half of this plate and get some rest. There’s some extra cookies for Chris in my special jar.”

“All right!” Going directly to the jar with music notation around the lid, Chris reached in and pulled out a bag with another dozen cookies in it. “I don’t care if she’s scary sometimes, she’s the best.” He took a bite, humming softly as it melted on his tongue. “Give her a hug for me. And tell her good luck on her test. I should probably run before the kids clear out that cooler. See you in the morning.”

“Yep.” JC took a bite out of a sandwich, chewing quickly. “Care to hit the alarm on your way out? I’ll catch the dead bolts before I turn in.”

“Sure thing.” With a two fingered wave, Chris spun and headed for the door. “Later, C.”

“Later.” Moments later, the beep of the alarm sounded, and the door thumped firmly as it closed. Blue eyes turned back to the note on the counter. “Stop worrying … yeah, right. One of us needs to.” Shaking his head, he finished the sandwich and a handful of crackers before draining his water and returning the plate to the refrigerator.

After making sure the locks were secured, he stopped to change into a pair of pajama pants and an old sleeveless undershirt, then began making his way up the stairs to check on her. Before he was halfway up, a noise drew his attention and he looked down into the living room, his eyes widening when he found her asleep on one of the couches, a book open on her chest and headphones over her ears.

Laughing under his breath, he turned around and came back down, his bare feet padding softly across the wooden floor until he stood above her. Closing the book, he laid it on the coffee table, then removed the headphones, taking extra care not to get them tangled in her hair. Quiet music carried to him and he listened for moment, grinning when he recognized her style in the catchy melody.

He stopped the disc, setting the headphones next to her Discman, and turned back to look at her, a soft smile forming as he took in her peaceful expression. Bending down, he slid his hands underneath her until he was sure he had a good grip, then very carefully lifted her up against his chest.

She breathed deeply and stirred, not quite coming awake as she turned her face into him, her sleepy voice muffled by his shoulder. “Josh?”

“Yeah.” Holding her closer as he moved toward the stairs, his head lowered until his chin rested against her hair. “Bedtime, Boof. Let’s get you to your room.”

“’Kay.” One of her arms wrapped around his neck and chills raced over his skin as her lips moved against him. “Did you eat enough?”

“You know I did.” Humor lightened his voice as he began climbing the staircase. “You always get your way, don’t you, mama bear?”

“Hmmm.” She hummed, still hovering in sleep as her fingers combed into his hair. “Not always.”

Silence settled and by the time he was carrying her into her bedroom, she was breathing steadily against him once again. Table lamps were lit on both sides of the bed, sending a warm glow through the room as he maneuvered around the furniture, laying her down on the side closest to the alarm clock, her brow furrowing when he reached up to pull her arm from around his neck.

He checked that the alarm was set, turned off the lamp, then brushed the hair out of her face before leaning down to kiss her forehead. “’Night, Jenny. Dream well.”

“Josh …” Her voice was little more than a whisper as one of her hands twitched his direction, her head turning slightly toward him. “Stay … please.”

The words gave him pause and he debated the wisdom behind sharing her bed for the night rather than heading downstairs to the room she’d declared as his whenever he wanted it. The decision was easy when she made a restless noise, turning on her side to face him, her hand moving further toward him as she came dangerously close to the edge of the bed.

“Okay, okay.” He spoke softly and pushed against her shoulders, moving her onto her back and toward the middle of the mattress. Shaking his head, he made his way around to the other side, switching off the lamp as he settled on the bed, releasing a deep breath as his body hit the soft comforter.

He’d no more than laid down when she rolled, her arm going around his neck once again, her cheek pressing into his chest as she snuggled herself to him. His heart skipped a few beats when she sighed and relaxed against him.

“What does it do to you whenever you touch her?”

The question Chris had asked him months ago came rushing back as he wrapped his arms around her and moved until he could press his lips to the top of her head. The answer he’d given then had been the absolute truth: he was well aware of what it did to him whenever he touched her. Looking back, he now realized that he’d been having the same reactions to her since he’d turned sixteen: his pulse became abnormal, his body relaxed, breathing became easier … there was peace. Any time she hugged him, touched his hand or leaned into him, happiness came. And whenever he had to leave her behind, every time she had to go away, there was a pain he couldn’t describe.

Which could pose a problem, considering the warnings Johnny had been giving them. It seemed that their type of act wasn’t exactly in demand for the American music scene. More than one of his groups had been sent overseas to break into the international market, attempting to create an interest stateside. Sometimes it worked. More often than not, it didn’t.

The chances of having to leave her again if they signed a deal were astronomically higher than the odds that they’d get to stay in the United States. They’d likely be able to visit, just as he had when he’d been performing for the Club. But those trips were sure to be fewer and farther between … and he’d have to make the impossible decision of splitting his time between his family and her.

“A thousand miles makes a big difference, you know. Besides, long distance relationships aren’t exactly my thing.”

His heart sank as he remembered her reasons for not getting more serious with Tony all those years ago. A thousand miles was only a fraction of the distance they could be travelling, and he knew there was no way he could be what she needed if they were on different continents. Forget being physically available, he wasn’t even sure if regular phone calls would be possible. Even if she could cope with not being able to see him, she needed someone who could be readily emotionally available to her, at the very least.

It didn’t appear that was going to be an option for him. And until the direction their future was headed became more clear, he couldn’t bring himself to allow them the choice.

With a silent groan, he buried his face in her hair and pulled her closer.

God, what I’d give to be able to have you.

----------------------------------------

November 9, 1995

The letter was lying in her mailbox when she got home, a deceivingly nondescript envelope that held results directly impacting the next three to five years of her life. Glancing quickly over at the collection of vehicles in the drive, she did a mental headcount and determined that Johnny must be meeting with the guys this afternoon. Looking down at the letter, she had a brief hope that she could make it to the privacy of her room without attracting attention from the group downstairs.

It was quiet as she walked quickly through the main rooms, grabbing the cordless phone from its cradle before dashing up the stairs and into her bedroom, closing the door behind her. Taking a deep breath, she hopped onto the bed and stretched out, getting comfortable and saying a silent prayer as her fingers tore open the flap and pulled out the single sheet of paper.

She read it quickly, then blinked, shaking her head as she read it again. Sitting straight up, she let her eyes travel over the words one last time before allowing a smile to form.

I passed.

Rolling quickly, she let her feet hit the floor and immediately began a dance of celebration around the room. “I passed!”

Picking up the phone, she dialed quickly, grinning as she listened to the answering machine greeting until the beep sounded. “Hey, Mom! I know you’re at work, but I wanted you to know that I just got my results. I passed! Looks like it’s Winter Class of ’98 for me. We’ll have to celebrate when I come up for break. Love you, Mom. Talk to you later.” Bouncing on her toes, she ended the connection and moved toward the door.

There was a commotion from the basement as she stepped out onto the landing and she heard a stampede heading up to the main level. Distracted by someone calling her name as the door banged open in the hallway, she didn’t realize she’d missed a step until her heel caught the very edge of the stair and slipped off, sending her tumbling onto her back on the staircase. She slid all the way down, her head slamming into each stair until she landed in a heap on the floor, the phone in her hand shattering into pieces with the impact.

For a moment, she just lay there with her eyes closed, holding her breath and trying to focus past the pain in her skull, the faint sound of quick footsteps surrounding her. Finally, she rolled to her back and groaned in agony as the pain made its way from her head and down her neck, radiating all the way through her body until it reached her fingers and toes. “Oh, my … owww.”

“Jenny?” JC’s voice came from somewhere around her and she felt his hands on her arms, releasing her immediately when she whimpered in pain. “God, Boof. Are you okay?”

“I don’t know yet. Give me a minute.” Taking a few deep breaths, she gathered enough of her senses to release the remaining shards of the phone, a slight relief setting in when its jagged edges quit cutting into her left palm. “Okay, I can’t tell. Am I still in one piece?”

“I’m not sure, but I hope you’re in better shape than the phone.” Lance began picking up the scattered pieces of plastic, making sure she didn’t cut herself. “I think it’s pretty much history.”

“If it makes you feel any better, I’ve never seen anybody fall down the stairs that gracefully. It almost looked choreographed.” Chris laughed when she made a face toward the ceiling. “Hey, I’ve finally got a nickname for you. Gracie.”

“Fantastic.” She finally opened her eyes, her brow furrowing as she grimaced, trying to sit up. “My God. I’m going to be feeling that for a few weeks.” Hands gently grasped her shoulders, helping her until she was upright, leaning back against … she turned her head until she could see who was behind her. “Thanks, J.”

“No problem.” He glanced back at the staircase. “What’s the rush, Shorty? Hot date?”

“Something like that.”

“Really?” Joey’s brows arched in surprise, ignoring the elbow Chris jabbed into his side. “Seriously?”

“No, not really.” She laughed, then groaned, shaking her head. “My results came today. I passed the exit exam for my general ed requirements.” With a sigh, she tried rolling out her shoulders. “If I get creative with my program electives and throw in a few summer courses, I should graduate a year and a half ahead of when they expect me to.”

“Looks like good news is going around all over today, huh, boys?”

Jen looked toward the kitchen, where Johnny was leaning against the counter, a half-eaten cookie in his fingers. “What happened?” Her gaze bounced to each smiling face around her, finally stopping to study JC. “You did it, didn’t you? They signed you.”

“As if you didn’t already know they would.” JC grinned, reaching down with both hands to help her stand. “You called it, Jenny. They signed the deal today.” Once she was on her feet, he pulled her into a gentle hug. “We were just on our way to grab you and go celebrate.”

“I guess we’ve all got a reason to party, then, don’t we?” She made her way slowly around the group, hugging each one of them. “If I hadn’t just tried to cripple myself, I’d be a little more enthusiastic about it, but I’m so proud of all of you.” Her hands came to her lower back, massaging the protesting muscles as she turned back to Johnny. “So, where are they going?”

“Sweden.”

“Oh, good.” A relieved smile crossed her features. “I was afraid they’d end up in Japan.”

“What?” JC’s fingers grasped her arm, turning her to face him. “You knew we’d have to go overseas?”

“Yeah.” She nodded her head in their manager’s direction. “I’ve been kept in the loop on pretty much everything. Johnny’s awesome like that.” Her gaze moved over his face and he could see her excitement for them, burying the touch of sadness she felt. It was that tiny bit of dimness in her smile that had him pulling her into his arms, hugging her tightly. “You’re going to have such an amazing time, Josh. When do you leave?”

“We were just getting to that part.” Johnny looked over the group around her. “Most studio work is going on hold because of the holiday season, so we have until January to make travel arrangements and get the paperwork straightened out. WEG has a property in Stockholm that will be your home base, similar to what Lou has for you here, but we’ll be on the move a lot, trying to generate interest with producers in Germany.” His arms crossed over his chest. “Getting the deal signed is just the beginning. The real work starts when we get there.”

“We’ll work then. Right now, we eat.” Joey looked around at the others. “Mexican? We haven’t done Salvador’s in a while.” There was a chorus of agreement and they began moving toward the door, grabbing up keys and bags as they went, pretending not to notice that they were leaving JC still holding Jen at the foot of the stairs.

“I’m glad we got the deal, but I was really hoping for other terms.” With a groan, he rested his chin against the side of her head. “I was praying that we’d at least get to stay in North America.”

“It’s okay, Josh. You have to go where the demand is.” Her smile was genuine as her fingers combed through his hair. “If they love pop groups in Germany, then to Germany you’ll go … or at least as close to Germany as you can get.”

“It’s five thousand miles, Jen.” He raised his head with a sigh. “Five thousand miles.”

“Hey, at least it’s not seven thousand miles.” She put a hand to his face, tapping her fingers against his cheek until he opened his eyes. “If you’re there long enough, maybe I can come visit. I’ve always wanted to see Europe.”

“If they like us, we could be over there for years.” His hands came to her hips, squeezing her as his brow furrowed. “And if we don’t grab somebody’s interest over here, we might have to stay there permanently.”

“Then I guess I’ll get to see a lot of Europe.” One side of her mouth quirked up. “If I pick the right time and you have a little wiggle room in your schedule, maybe we can go to Paris. I’d love to see Paris. Or Rome. Or you could meet me in Scotland. All those castles must be fantastic to see. I could bring H and Ty and we’ll check out Loch Ness, see if we can’t find any signs of Nessie.”

“Boof …” A frustrated sigh escaped.

“Josh, stop it. This is a great opportunity … the best opportunity. Don’t let a little thing like distance make you regret what you’ve worked so hard for.”

“Yeah, I know.” A dark brow rose questioningly. “I kind of imagined that you’d take it a little harder than this. Maybe be just a tad bit more upset?”

“Oh, just you wait. I’ll be a complete mess the week you’re supposed to leave.” She leaned forward and laughed softly into his chest. “You’ll be running for the plane just to escape the waterworks.”

“I doubt that.” He closed his eyes again and hugged her tightly, taking a deep breath when her arms went around his waist. “I don’t want to leave you here alone, Jenny.”

“I won’t be alone. Maggie, Brian, Adam, Matt, Amber, Chloe, the folks from the Center … they’re all here.” A sigh escaped as she pressed her cheek against him. “Mom’s retiring next month, so she’ll be here all the time. I’ll have to tell her to bring your mom down, too. Mrs. Fatone still wants a lot of my recipes – and keeps telling me to set aside time for a bread lesson – so I’m sure she’ll be around. Big Joe is determined to beat me at chess, so he’s threatening me with a rematch. And I’d thought about asking your parents if the kids could visit during a few of their school breaks. The whole family could come, since I’ve got so much room. We could do the Disney thing. Or maybe Busch Gardens. I haven’t been there yet.”

“Just make sure you still have room for me, okay?” A crooked smile formed across his features. “I’m not sure how I feel about you having a list of people ready to take my place.”

“Your place is permanently reserved. Always.” She grinned up at him. “And I’ll have a room for you, too. I know it’s more like a guest room right now, but before you go, we need to make the suite down here yours. It’s basically an apartment, anyway … it just doesn’t have a kitchen. Anything you can’t take with you can stay here and whenever you cross back over to this side of the pond, you’ll have a place to stay when you aren’t in Bowie.”

“You really want me to move in?”

“Well, you already stay here a few nights a week. And I’ve been telling you for months that if the Funky Bunch got to be too much for you, then you could just move over here.” Shaking her head, she laughed. “Honestly, I’m surprised you haven’t caved before now. You know I love them to death, but being trapped with them all day, every day would have me flying off my rocker.”

“Yeah, I know.” He leaned down, kissing her forehead. “Thanks, Jen. You’re the best.”

“Sure.” She pulled away from him when she felt his stomach growling. “Think they’ve already got a table? I’m suddenly in the mood for chimichangas.” As she turned to grab her keys, her lower back and legs protested painfully. “And maybe we should hurry. I get the feeling I’m not going to be very mobile in the next little while.”

“I’m not surprised.” With a laugh, he took the keys from her. “Let’s go, Gracie. Your chariot awaits.”

----------------------------------------

November 18, 1995

“The canvas can do miracles, just you wait and see.” Jen breathed between lines, letting her gaze travel over the circle of toddlers napping on mats around her on the floor, making sure all was well. “It’s not far to Never-Never Land, no reason to pretend …” She shifted carefully in the rocking chair, trying to jumpstart the blood flow to her still-bruised legs without jostling the little chatterbox lying on her lap. “Sailing takes me away …”

“Miss Denny?”

No such luck. Sighing, she turned a smile to the big green eyes staring up at her. “What is it, Sophie?”

“Why sing dat song?”

“Because my Daddy sang it to put me to sleep when I was your age. It was his favorite, so now it’s one of mine.” With a quiet laugh, she lowered her head to kiss the crown of black curls leaned against her shoulder. “Don’t you like it?”

“Wike.” A tiny hand came up to pat her cheek. “Sing mo’?”

“You want more Sailing?”

“Sumpin’ else?”

“Okay, but you have to close your eyes first.” A sound came from the hallway and she cringed, looking around for movement among the others. “Nap time won’t be over for a little while longer.”

“’Kay.” Sophie obediently closed her eyes, snuggling into Jen as she relaxed again. “Sing mo’.”

“When the night has come and the land is dark, and the moon is the only light we’ll see …” After some quick thought, she began a different tune and set to rocking the chair, carefully shifting the toddler into a more comfortable position as her breathing deepened. “No, I won’t be afraid. No, I won’t be afraid. Just as long as you stand, stand by me. So darlin’, darlin’, stand by me …”

A louder noise came from the doorway and Jen swallowed hard, looking down at the child who was beginning to stir in her arms, her eyes blinking open again.

“Miss Denny?”

A silent groan was masked by another smile. “Yes, Sophie?”

“Why sing dat song?”

“Because it reminds me of my friend.”

“Oo have fwien?”

“Yep. I have lots of friends, but this one is special.” She leaned down to whisper in Sophie’s ear. “He’s my best friend.”

Green eyes widened, intrigued. “He spesho?”

“Very special.”

“Berry spesho.” Sophie was quiet for a moment, her head tilting as she looked across the room. “Miss Denny?”

“Hmm?”

“Who dat?”

“Who’s … who?” Jen followed the girl’s pointing finger to the doorway and found JC and Chris leaned on either side, grinning at her. Shaking her head, she sent them a smile and turned back to Sophie. “That’s JC and Chris. They’re friends of mine.”

“Daycee an’ Cwis?” Sophie looked up for confirmation.

“That’s right. JC is my very special friend. Okay, I’m going to set you down, sweetie.” Sliding the girl off her lap, she began fishing in her pocket. “You want to know a big secret?”

Black curls bounced with a vigorous nod.

“Okay, but you have to promise to keep it. Promise?” Retrieving her car keys, she watched as Sophie nodded again. “JC gives the best hugs in the world.”

“Inna whirl?”

“Uh huh. In the whole wide world.” She pressed the keys into the little girl’s hand and pulled her close. “If you take these keys to him and ask really nicely, he’ll give you one. How does that sound?”

The toddler looked down at the keys in her hand. “Keys to Daycee an’ hug?”

“That’s right.” Jen turned Sophie toward the doorway and pointed to the left. “Take them to the man in the blue shirt, okay?”

Without another word, little feet took off at a run toward JC, stopping just short of slamming into his shins. Sophie craned her head back to look way up. “Daycee?”

“That’s me.” With a laugh, he knelt in front of her, smiling into the cherubic face. “Hi, sweetheart. What’s your name?”

“Is Sophie.”

“Oh, what a pretty name!” He exclaimed, crossing his arms over his knee and sending a glance over the girl’s head to find Jen biting her lips to hold back laughter. “It’s nice to meet you, Sophie.”

“Nice meet.” The keys jingled in her tiny fingers as she held them out. “Miss Denny say keys to Daycee an’ hug.”

“The keys are for me and you want a hug?” As he took the keys, he waited for clarification.

“Hug.” Sophie nodded. “Peas? Miss Denny say Daycee bes’ hug inna whirl.”

“Is that so?” A grin lightened his face as Chris covered a laugh with a fake cough. “Well, I guess we’ll find out, huh?” Very carefully, he gathered the toddler to him in a tight hug, lifting her from the floor so that she could wrap her little arms around his neck. Standing to his feet, he began swaying from side to side, letting his cheek rest on her black curls. “How’s that, Sophie?”

“Bes’ inna whirl.” She sighed against him. “Miss Denny say Daycee berry spesho fwien. Sing song fo’. Daycee me spesho fwien, too?”

“Sure thing, kiddo.” His hand patted her back as her head turned on his shoulder, her gaze landing on Chris.

“Cwis hug, too?”

“Me, too?” Dark eyes widened in mock surprise when her arms stretched his direction. “Are you sure? You just had the best hug in the world. I’d probably disappoint.”

“No hug depoit. Peas?” A pout marred Sophie’s face as she reached further for him. “Cwis spesho fwien, too?”

“Yeah, I’m special, too.” Chris took her from JC, smiling when she immediately put her arms around his neck and cuddled into his chest. “Aren’t you just a little princess?”

“No pwincie. I jus’ Sophie.”

“Oops. My bad. Just Sophie it is.” He bent down, putting her on her feet and pointing her back to the napping group. “We’ve got to go, Just Sophie, but we’ll see you again.”

“’Kay. Bye bye bye. Nice meet, Daycee, Cwis.” Without a backward glance, she took off, running across the room to where Jen had turned the chair around to watch them. She grinned and held her arms out when the toddler came close, expertly hiding her grimace as she scooped her right back into her lap.

“Bye guys. Have fun.” Jen leaned down and whispered into Sophie’s ear, smiling as the little girl waved goodbye before looking back toward the doorway. “Pick me up at four?”

“See you then.” JC nodded and waved, turning to follow Chris out into the hallway. Pausing just outside the door, he glanced over his shoulder, taking in how Jen hugged the toddler into her body, automatically rocking in a soothing motion and humming. She smiled softly when little fingers patted at her face, then pressed her lips against Sophie’s cheek.

“Hey, Jace … we gotta go, man. Stop mooning over Gracie and get a move on.”

Shaking his head, he took off after Chris, heading for the parking lot.

*********************

Four o’clock couldn’t come fast enough, but when four thirty arrived and she still had children at her feet, Jen knew it was going to be a long evening. With a sigh, she made sure her backpack was secured in a spot on her back that would cause the least pain before leaning down to pick up a whimpering toddler in each arm and making her way out the door and down the hallway. The little ones clung tightly to her, each limb pressing against her bruised skin, tiny fingers tangling painfully in her hair as she stopped at the reception desk.

“Hey, Kara. Any sign of Clowers and Bright?”

The girl working the desk looked up at her exhausted tone, her eyes widening at the trio standing in front of her. “Oh, hey, Jen. Are you still here?”

“Yep. We’ve got two stragglers.” The children looked back and forth between the young women, lips beginning to tremble in warning of oncoming waterworks. “Parent pick up running late today?”

“I didn’t think so, but I guess I didn’t realize what time it was.” Kara glanced toward the doors as they came open, both of the parents under question rushing in, full of apologies as they claimed their offspring and ran back out. “Well, that was convenient. Did you have the Romper Room to yourself today?”

“All by myself.” Jen released a weary breath. “And I’m hoping it doesn’t happen again. They’re sweet, but eight little ones are really too much for one person.” She shifted uncomfortably under the weight of her bag. “And it doesn’t help that I’m too stiff to really chase after them.”

“Yeah, I heard what happened.” Kara grimaced as she recalled the description. “It’s a miracle you didn’t break something. Good thing you’ve got a vacation next week. Maybe you’ll be healed up before you come back in.”

“Hopefully. A little TLC from my Mom will work wonders, I’m sure.”

Both girls looked up when the door opened again, JC stepping into the lobby and looking around, smiling when he found her. “Hey, Boof. You ready?”

“Yeah. Be right there.” She turned back to Kara. “Have a great Thanksgiving.”

“You, too.” Kara’s eyes moved over JC twice and she nodded appreciatively before leaning across the counter and lowering her voice. “And I’d think a little TLC from him would work more than wonders. Just saying.”

“Uh huh. Okay.” Jen laughed as she walked slowly toward the door, shaking her head. “See you later.”

“Later.”

“Sorry I’m late.” She apologized as she came closer to him, reaching for the straps on her shoulders to adjust them again. “We had a few to stay over.”

“No biggie.” He held the door for her, letting her get just in front of him before hooking his fingers through the top loop of her pack. “Here, let me take it.” She didn’t argue when he slipped the bag from her arms, sighing in relief when the weight left her back. “Are you okay?”

“I’ll be fine. I’m just stiff. And tired.” A grin formed as she looked up at him. “I love working the Romper Room, but it’s hard enough when it’s just me, let alone when my body feels like it’s ninety years old.”

“Well, ninety won’t last forever.” He laughed quietly, letting his arm rest lightly on her shoulders as they walked to the car. “You’ll be back to normal before you know it.”

“I hope so.” She shook her head when he tried to hand her the keys. “No, you drive. Until we get to where you’re going, anyway.” With a sigh, she pulled open the front passenger side door and reached for her bag. “After I leave you, I get to run to the grocery store. I’ll take any resting minute I can get.” Her gaze traveled to the back seat, one brow raising when she found Chris and Justin quietly trading punches. “Oh, hey guys. Along for the ride?”

“Hey, Shorty.” Justin grinned. “Fun day?”

“Sure … the funnest, as the two-year-olds like to say.” She sat back in the seat, shifting until she was almost comfortable before digging through her bag for her grocery list and giving it a quick review. “Kind of glad it’s almost over.”

“Change of plan, guys.” JC started the engine, casting a sideways glance her direction, just in time to catch her pained grimace. “Grocery store, then Jen’s place.”

“What? No, you guys don’t have to …”

“Cool. Let’s see your list.” Cutting off her protest, Chris reached between the seats and plucked the paper from her fingers. “You itemize by aisle number? Damn, Gracie. Just split it into three and we’ll knock it out in no time.” He studied the list, then handed it back to her. “What are you making, anyway?”

“I’m getting a head start on prepping for my Christmas baking. I have a few extra treat baskets to make this year.” Pulling out a pen, she added a few more items. “And Joey’s mom asked me to bring potato and pasta salads and a few desserts for their pre-holiday thing this weekend.”

“There wouldn’t be a Reese’s pie on that menu, would there?” Justin leaned forward, giving her his very best puppy-dog expression. “The last one you made was yum.”

“Yum, huh?” She laughed and put her hand on his face, pushing him into his seat. “I guess that would work. It’d be easy enough to make a larger version in a cake pan.” In the rearview mirror, she caught the fist bump between the two in the back. “Seriously, you guys are such pushovers. A little chocolate, some peanut butter and you’re helpless mush.”

“Just for you, Gracie. You spoil us on purpose, and you know it.” Chris winked at her in the mirror as JC pulled into a parking space. “It’s okay.  Even if you didn’t, we’d know you love us.”

“Like you give me a choice.” Her smile cut through her exhaustion and she split the list evenly as they piled out of the car. “Okay, you guys take the sides, Josh and I will take the middle. I’m kind of picky about my baking ingredients and seasonings.”

“Sure thing. We’ll meet you in the baking aisle, then.” Justin gave a quick wave as he and Chris each grabbed a basket and split to opposite ends of the store, leaving Jen to take a cart.

“They’re going to be finished before we are.” Her tone was apologetic as she looked over at JC, who matched her slow pace through the store. “Sorry. I know this isn’t exactly a guy thing.”

“Take your time. We’ve got nowhere to be.” He smiled, following her as she selected jars of smooth and chunky peanut butter, then reached up for the pickles and spiced olives she pointed out on a high shelf. “How do you shop when you’re by yourself? There’s a lot of stuff you can’t reach.”

“Stock boys are actually pretty nice.” Glancing down at her list, she bit back a grin. “There’s usually one going by just when I need him.”

“Uh huh. I’m sure they’re all kinds of handy.” Rolling his eyes when she couldn’t see him, he shook his head as he focused on a guy in a grocery store apron hovering around the head of the aisle. “Anyway, you should definitely check Tweedle Dee and Tweedle Dum’s baskets when we find them. They’ve probably made bets on who finishes first, so there’s no telling what you’ll end up with.”

“Thanks for the tip.” She paused, then laughed as they turned into the baking aisle. “I think J ended up with the candy aisle on his side. Do I need to be worried?”

“More than likely.”

“Great. Well, I could always make cookie bars with the extras.” She tossed in a variety of pudding and cake mixes, a box of graham cracker crumbs, a few packages of chocolate chips, a bag of powdered sugar, some Marshmallow Creme and a large tin of cocoa before stopping in front of the spices, her gaze falling on a plastic jar of Pumpkin Pie Spice. “Oh, that reminds me. I need to make sure Mom picks up the stuff for a pumpkin roll next week. Your dad and Heather always like one at Thanksgiving.”

“You know, Chris wasn’t kidding. You really do spoil everybody.”

“Except for you, now that I think about it.” Her teeth worked over her lip as she turned her attention to him. “I can’t think of one time when you’ve asked for anything special.”

“Jenny, you’re too good to me and you know it. You’re letting me move in with you … even if I won’t actually be here much, you’ll be housing my stuff. Besides, you already know my weaknesses.” He laughed, pulling her to his side and kissing the top of her head. “Anything chocolate and I’m at your mercy.”

“Noted. I’m thinking a Death by Chocolate might be on the menu, too.” She picked up a few packages of brownie mix and grinned at his mock groan, then pointed to a row of spices just out of her reach. “Can you hand me two cinnamons, a paprika and a red pepper? With the black label?”

As he was reaching for the containers, the song over the store radio changed and she immediately focused on the familiar melody, her eyes widening as the first verse began.

Sorry I never told you all I wanted to say
And now it’s too late to hold you
’Cuz you’ve flown away, so far away

She grabbed his wrist, jerking him to a halt.

“You did say paprika, right?” He turned to look at her. “Jen?”

“Shh! Listen.” Bouncing on her toes, her pain was forgotten as she grinned brightly. “Listen!”

“To what?” His brow furrowed as he listened carefully, his gaze meeting hers at the familiar lyrics. “Is that Boyz II Men?”

“That’s my song.” She gasped, hopping up and down as a new voice came in. “They made it a duet with … Mariah Carey?” He could see the excitement in her eyes when her other hand instinctively reached for him. “Josh, Boyz II Men and Mariah Carey are singing my song!”

With a wide grin, he dropped the spices in the cart and grabbed her up against him, her feet leaving the floor and her arms going around his neck as he spun with her, both of them laughing. Their excited ruckus earned more than a few stares and drew Chris and Justin to the head of the aisle, curious about the commotion.

“That’s my song!” Without thinking – and with total disregard to their audience – her hands came to his face, her lips meeting his in a giddy, friendly peck. As she pulled away, brown eyes locked on blue and she felt him take a shuddering breath, his eyes darkening as he leaned into her, connecting again.

For a split second, she was startled, then she closed her eyes and tilted her head to give him a better angle as his mouth moved against hers. With a nearly silent whimper, she responded, her fingers sliding around and into his hair as she relaxed into his arms. He lowered her so she could stand, his lips catching hers over and over again as one arm tightened to pull her closer, his hand coming to her face as he proceeded to blow their kiss from her prom night completely out of the water, setting off a riot of fireworks through her that would rival any Fourth of July display.

Vaguely aware of the twittering among the shoppers watching them, he lightened the pressure and tried to back off, but she went on her toes and followed after him, her arms wrapping around his neck as she showed him that she wasn’t ready for an ending yet. Sighing into her, he kissed her softly a few times more before finally pulling away, resting his forehead against hers as he licked his lips, catching the surprising flavor of berries and cream. Smiling inwardly, he let himself focus on her mouth, wondering if she knew how much of a turn-on the flavored lip gloss was … and he briefly considered asking if this was the only flavor she wore, or if there were others she used.

Her eyes opened after a moment, meeting his for only seconds before softening with a confused smile, a faint blush staining her cheeks as she tried to gather herself enough to form a coherent thought. “Well, that … Josh, I … I, uh … Wow.” As the stuttered mess of words tumbled out, she grimaced with an embarrassed moan, her face instantly blazing a bright crimson. He chuckled under his breath, straightening up to press his lips to her forehead then pulling her to him so she could hide her face in his chest.

That’s one way to put it, Boof. Definitely wow.

“Now that was a kiss!” An elderly man shuffled down the aisle, his eyes sparking with amusement as he clapped a gnarled hand over JC’s shoulder on his way by. “Always kiss her like that, son. Trust me, time will fly away before you know it. Don’t waste a day, don’t waste a minute.” He smiled as he moved away. “I’d give anything to be able to kiss my girl like that again.”

A glance further down the aisle had him meeting the gleeful, triumphant expressions his bandmates were sporting. Chris raised his eyebrows suggestively and Justin was grinning like the Cheshire cat as they both gave him nods of approval and a comically synchronized thumbs-up. Looking at them, reality came crashing down on him, and he groaned silently as he turned back to her, leaning down to bury his face against her hair.

Time’s not the only thing flying away, old man. So am I. Five thousand miles, Jenny. How could I possibly ask you to be mine with that between us?

January 11, 1996

“Is this the last one?” JC grunted as he took the box Chris passed to him, maneuvering it into the stack on the left side of the largest basement storage room.

“Yeah.” With a quiet groan, Chris moved through the double doors and plopped down on the new couch, running a hand through his hair as he stared at the new TV across the room. “She really didn’t have to do this, Jace. I mean … you, I understand. Me?”

“You were gonna be homeless, man.” Closing the door in the hallway, JC came into the living room of Chris’ new apartment and collapsed on the other end of the cushions. “What did you expect her to do?”

“I know, but …” He paused, gesturing with one hand around the redecorated room. “I just … really? All I needed was a place to sleep. She didn’t have to update everything and add furniture down here, too.” Running his fingers over the fabric covering the armrest, he shook his head. “This was already nicer than the last apartment I had.”

“You should’ve been there when she made me go shopping for my space. All I wanted was a new comforter for the bed, but she corrected me fast.” JC’s tone was light with humor. “Trust me, just go with it. She’d originally planned to put you in one of the rooms upstairs, but thought you might like to have a little more privacy. Plus, Maggie and her drama group are down here all the time because of the studio, so it’s not like they won’t be using it while we’re gone.”

“Yeah, okay.” Closing his eyes, Chris leaned his head back and yawned. “Are you ready to go? Tomorrow’s gonna be a hell of a day.”

“As ready as I can be, I guess. My bags are in the hallway next to yours.” A sigh carried through the room. “I’m glad the others stopped by today. Jenny’s already a wreck, and too many big goodbyes at one time might’ve done her in.”

“She’ll be okay, C.”

“I know. But she’s hurting right now, and it tears me up because I know I’m the main reason for it.”

“Well, like he said, I’ll be okay.” Both looked up at her voice, finding her leaning against the doorjamb. “It won’t be the first time I’ve missed you, Josh. I’ll get used to it, I promise.”

“Hey, Gracie.” Chris smiled, getting up from the couch to go to her for a hug. “Thanks again …”

“Don’t mention it, Spazz.” Jen glanced around, noticing how all the boxes had been removed from the living area. “Everything work out okay?”

“It’s perfect.” His expression dimmed when he saw her red-rimmed eyes and he stepped back, raising his hands to her shoulders. “I don’t know how long it’ll be …”

“As long as you need it, it’s yours. Mi casa es su casa.” She stretched up to kiss his cheek. “I can’t believe I bought a house this big just because I fell in love with a window seat. I have to fill it somehow.” Laughing softly, she pulled away. “You guys have been down here for hours and Maggie is due in anytime. I’ve got chicken tortilla soup with fresh chips ready if you’re hungry.”

“Sounds great, Boof. Thanks.” JC rose to his feet, sending her a grateful smile. “We’ll be there in a few.” As she headed back through the studio and up the stairs, the guys looked at each other, concern mirrored on their faces. “You see what I mean?” Distress colored JC’s voice as she disappeared into the hallway. “I feel like I’m ripping the soul right out of her.”

“Well, Jace, of course she’s upset. You haven’t exactly been Mr. Happy-Go-Lucky these past few weeks, either.” A dark brow rose in challenge. “I’d guess that’s because you love her just as much as she loves you.”

“Yeah, I know.”

“Well, that was easier than I expected. Usually you fight me a lot harder.” Chris laughed in surprise. “What gives?”

“Why try to deny it? You and J were both in that grocery store and saw the entire thing.”

“Oh, you mean that time you tried to set a fire beside the brownie mixes? Now that was some heat.” He grinned at the blush spreading up JC’s neck. “I guess the real question is how many times has that been repeated since?”

“None. I didn’t want to string her along.”

“But you explained that to her, right?”

“Not exactly.”

“Not exactly? What does that mean?”

“Okay, so we haven’t talked about it at all.” JC cringed at Chris’ incredulous expression. “When she didn’t bring it up, I avoided the entire thing.”

“And that’s where you’re screwing up, C. You can’t be hot one second, then cold the next. You’re just going to confuse her and frustrate yourself.” His hands came to his friend’s shoulders, forcing him to make eye contact. “She’d wait for you, you know. All you have to do is ask.”

“Wait for how long? One year? Five years?” An exasperated sigh escaped as he shook away and moved toward the stairs. “That would be the most unfair thing I could ask of her. I can’t do it, Chris.”

“I think it’s more unfair that you aren’t giving her the chance to decide for herself.” Shaking his head, Chris followed him up to the hallway. “It might be easier on her if she knew you wanted her to. At least her heart wouldn’t be breaking as badly as it is. You need to be honest with her and tell her how you feel.” He grabbed JC’s arm, pulling him to a halt before they reached the main level. “And not just the parts you think she needs to hear, either. Tell her everything. She won’t disappoint you, I promise.”

“I never thought she’d disappoint me. I’m terrified that I’ll disappoint her. I can’t be here for her and it’s killing me.” Horrified, JC felt tears gathering in his eyes. “No matter how badly I want her to wait for me, a bigger part of me wants her to have someone who can be here for her. She doesn’t just need that … she deserves that. She should have someone who can stand beside her and support her, someone who can hold her hand, take her out and kiss her goodnight.” He turned and sat down on the steps, dropping his face into his hands. “It makes me sick just thinking about someone else being that person for her, but I love her enough to want her to be free to find him, since it can’t be me.”

“But what about what she wants? And don’t you think she should be the one deciding what she needs? I know the distance sucks, but it’s not like you’re never going to talk to her or see her. They have phones over there, you know. Lance got us set up with that e-mail thing so the time difference won’t be such an issue. The deal states we’ll have regular visits home, and she’s already said she’d like to see Europe. You’re totally overthinking this, Jace. Don’t shoot yourself in the foot by blowing it out of proportion.”

“But I …”

“Josh? Chris?” Suddenly, she was there, standing in the hallway, obviously confused at their odd positions on the stairs. “Are you guys okay?”

“We’re absolutely fine.” Chris smiled, putting out a hand to help JC up. “C was having a bit of a stress-out moment. It’s all good.”

“Okay …” Her eyes were narrowed suspiciously, traveling from one face to the other as they came to stand in front of her. “Yeah, I’m not buying it, but I’m not gonna push. Soup’s simmering on the stove, chips are on the counter, there’s sour cream and shredded cheese in the fridge if you need it. I’m heading up to take a shower.” She glanced to JC with a tired smile. “Can we watch a movie later? Or something?”

“Anything you want, Boof.” He pulled her into a tight hug and rested his cheek against her hair, his brow furrowing when he felt how her fingers clutched at his shirt. “I’ll grab a bite to eat and then head for a shower, too. Go get comfortable and I’ll meet you in the living room in a little while.”

“Okay.”

“Uh … hey, Jen?” Chris cleared his throat quietly. “I was thinking about calling Mom and my sisters tonight. Is that okay?”

“Of course it is.” She stepped away from JC with a sigh. “There are separate lines in the office and basement if you don’t want to stay in the main rooms.” Her hand patted his shoulder on her way by. “Just pick one and take as long as you want.” As she started up the staircase, her voice floated back to them. “Josh, you might want to do the same thing. Aunt Karen probably wouldn’t be too happy if she didn’t hear from you before you left.”

It was eight o’clock before he could finally head for the living room, baggy lounge pants swishing around his legs, hair still damp from his shower, a few stray water droplets soaking into the collar of his t-shirt. He found her curled up at the end of one of the couches, hugging a pillow to her chest as she flipped through the channels on the television. “Hey, Jenny. Sorry it took so long. The entire clan was over for game night, so I had to talk to everybody. They all said to tell you hi.” Making his way around the furniture, he paused behind her to lean down and kiss the top of her head. “You still in a movie mood?”

“Yeah.” She looked up at him with a smile, trading remotes so she could control the VCR, pressing play so the previews would start. “Do you want popcorn?”

“Nah, I’m good.” He relaxed back into the cushions, grinning when he saw that she was wearing the fuzzy tie-dyed pajama pants he’d gotten her for Christmas, topped by an oversized Beatles shirt … a gift from Justin, if he remembered correctly. “I’m glad you like those. Do they fit?”

“They’re a little too big, but that’s how I like them. And they’re the softest things I’ve ever worn.” Her fingers rubbed against the material, pressing it against her leg as she looked down at the bright fabric. “Too bad I can’t wear them to class. I’d have it made.”

“Go ahead. Make a fashion statement.” His teasing earned a small grin, and he turned to the movie, laughing as the opening credits began. “Spaceballs? Really?”

“I wanted something funny, and I thought The Princess Bride probably wouldn’t cut it.” A brow arched as her glance cut over to him. “Is this okay?”

“As you wish, Boof.”

“Ha ha.” She whipped the pillow she was holding toward him and he caught it, sending her a triumphant look as he began hugging it himself, not inclined to give it back. “Fine, you win.” Shaking her head, she laughed quietly, shifting until her feet were on the cushion beside her and propping her elbow on the armrest so she could rest her chin in her hand.

He knew how hard she was fighting to keep things light and easy, and he felt a twist in his stomach when he saw her biting her lip to keep it from trembling. By the time Princess Vespa had escaped from her wedding to Prince Valium, tears had escaped, and she was trying to choke back sobs. “Jenny, come here.” Sliding across the cushions toward her, he pulled her into his arms. “It’s gonna be okay.”

“I know.” Twisting around, she straddled his lap until she could press her face into his shoulder and wrap her arms around his neck, just as she’d done whenever she was upset as a little girl. “I know …”

His arms tightened around her as her sobs increased, his head tilting down until he could feel her hair against his cheek. “You’re breaking my heart, Boof.” He began rocking side to side when he felt her tears soaking through his shirt, trying to comfort her. “Maybe you shouldn’t come with us to the airport. I’ll never be able to walk away from you if you’re this upset.”

“I’ll b-be fine.” She forced the words out between hiccupping sobs. “Just l-let me get this p-part over with.”

Continuing to rock her, he let the fingers of one hand slide into her hair and pressed his lips to the side of her head, letting loose a few tears of his own as he prayed that she was right. In the past, whenever she was upset, it only took one good cry for her to begin settling down, and he hoped that this time would be no different. For both of their sakes.

The spaceship had just gone plaid on the television when she began to calm down, taking deep, steadying breaths as she relaxed against him, sniffling away the last of her tears. As she backed away, her hair caught in the black cord around his neck, pulling his necklace out from underneath his shirt. “Sorry.” Combing her fingers through the strands to untangle it, she focused on the silver pendant on the cord and froze, a small smile forming as she looked up at him. “I can’t believe you still wear that.”

“I’ve had to replace the cord a few times, but I really haven’t taken it off since you gave it to me.” His hands came up to her face, his thumbs wiping the tears away from her cheeks. “And I never will. You’re always with me, Jen. No matter where I am.” A flash of something sparked in her eyes and he couldn’t help a smile as he kissed her forehead.

She shifted forward, raising up so she could touch his face, her gaze trailing repeatedly over his features, committing them to memory. Her lips pressed against the skin just below his hairline, then moved down to make contact on each of his cheeks. Brown eyes softened as they met his and he could feel her fingers brushing against his jaw, heard her take a breath, saw her eyes close, and then she was kissing him, her lips catching his tentatively at first, then with more confidence when he responded.

His hands fell to her hips, squeezing her tightly for just a moment, until he felt her fingers moving, sliding into his hair. He groaned quietly, his arms pulling her closer to him, one hand flattening between her shoulder blades as he raised his chin just slightly, giving her more direct access.

Again and again, her mouth moved over his, until she tilted her head with a whisper of a moan – a sound that he felt more than heard – and pressed herself even more fully against him. For a moment, he couldn’t think past how perfectly her curves fit to him, as if she were made specifically to be held in his arms. Then her fingers tightened in his hair and he felt her tongue touch his, setting off a shivering reaction through him so intense, he had to try to put a little space between them.

“Jen …” Another kiss cut him off and another shudder went through him, his body responding eagerly despite his efforts to keep himself in check. Everything in him was begging to turn her onto her back, press her down into the cushions and go with the feelings, to hell with the consequences. But his brain won over his body, his hands grasping her waist and pushing her away from him. “Jen … Jenny, stop. We really need to stop.”

“I know.” She let her forehead fall to his shoulder, her breathing just as ragged as his as she tried to regain control, cringing as words from the past began bouncing around in her memory. “I know. I’m not very good at this.” He felt her shake her head slightly, clearing her throat. “I’m sorry, Josh.”

“What?” His brow furrowed in confusion as he reached up for her, pushing against her shoulders until he could almost see her face. “You’re not very good at what?”

“This.” Her gaze briefly met his before lowering to stare at his chest, a blush seeping into her cheeks as the old insults resurfaced. “The … uh, 'hands on' stuff.”

“You’re joking, right?” Incredulity lifted his voice as he touched her chin, making her look at him. “Please tell me you’re not serious right now.”

“Well, at first I thought he was just mad because I wouldn’t have sex with him …”

“Who was mad you wouldn’t have sex with him?” A hot fury burned through him, his voice sharpening. “Luke?” He growled when she nodded. “I really wish you’d have let me deck him. Just once.”

“It wasn’t just him, really. I tried dating a few other guys and apparently …” Insecurity flared in her eyes, dimming them just a little as he studied her. “Considering recent events, I think I’m finally realizing that it’s a popular opinion.”

“Jen …” Pain streaked through him at the thought of her with guys he hadn’t even known about, then his heart sank when he realized what she was telling him. “I’d never … if I made you feel that way, then I’m so sorry.” She leaned into him and he gathered her to his chest. “God, I’m sorry, Boof. I didn’t think … okay, here’s the deal.” He took a deep breath. “I really didn’t mean to start anything between us back in November. Not because I didn’t want to, but because I’m leaving, and I didn’t want to be unfair to you. Then you took me by surprise, and I couldn’t help myself.” Out of habit, he licked his lips, the faint flavor of cupcakes prompting a smile to enter his voice as he combed his fingers through her hair. “Once we were alone again, you have no idea how hard it was to not pick back up where we left off in that grocery store. Just … wow.”

“Huh?” She straightened up to look at him. “What do you mean?”

“Well, that’s how you put it.” With a quiet laugh, he leaned forward and kissed her cheek quickly. “You, Jennifer Lawson, are completely wow. At least, you are for me.” He cleared his throat. “And it’s not just when we’re 'hands on', either. It’s pretty much anytime I’m near you.” Tilting his head, he looked at her with a thoughtful expression. “Although, I don’t think we’ve ever really been 'hands off'. Have we? We’ve always been clingy and … well, touchy with each other. It never crossed my mind to be anything else.” One eyebrow arched questioningly. “I’ve never thought twice about touching or holding you. Does … does that bother you?”

“No, of course not.”

“And when I kissed you in November, did it weird you out?”

“Did it seem like I was weirded out?” She shook her head, staring at him. “I’m pretty sure my kissing you back showed I was more than fine with it. Even though …” Her nose wrinkled slightly as she felt the blush starting to deepen. “Tonight was a little more than just wow.”

“Yeah, that was intense. That’s why I had to stop.” He leaned his forehead against hers, smiling softly. “I know part of it was because you’re upset about tomorrow, but … you know, I’m a guy and I’m going to respond like one. You were getting dangerously close to the Point of No Return, Boof. I’d say you’re pretty fantastic at the 'hands on' stuff. Especially with me.” His smile became a grin when she groaned in embarrassment. “But that’s not somewhere we need to go.”

“Right.” Her voice was uncertain as she pulled away from him. “Because we’re just friends.”

“That’s not what I was trying to say. How we react to each other should prove it’s not true, anyway. But we’re not even dating, so taking us and jumping all the way to that step in one night … you would’ve totally regretted it, Jen. There’s so much that should happen before that. If it had gone any further tonight, we wouldn’t have even made it to my bedroom, and you deserve much better than a quickie on your living room couch. It would’ve changed everything between us, at ludicrous speed.” His brow arched as he referenced the movie they were supposed to be watching. “We’re nowhere near ready for that. Not like this. And definitely not right now.”

“It’s okay, Josh. I understand.”

“Do you?” A sigh lifted his shoulders. “The timing on this is just horrible. In twenty-four hours, I’m gonna be on a different continent and there’s no telling when I’m gonna be home again. I’ve been fighting with myself for months over how I feel about you and … and I really don’t know what to do.” One of his hands came up to her face as his gaze met hers. “I know what I want to do …”

“What’s that?”

“I want to kiss you senseless and beg you to wait for me until it works out so we can try for something more.”

“Seems reasonable.” Do it. Kiss me, beg me. Please. Make me forget I was ever the worst thing that could’ve happened. She covered his hand with her own, her expression not giving away her inner dialogue. “So why don’t you?”

“Because it’s the most selfish thing I could ever do, and it’s totally unfair to you.” A touch of sadness entered his tone. “How could I ask you to waste years of your life waiting for me when Mr. Right might be walking across campus with you next week? I want that for you. For you to have someone who can be here for you, hold your hand and laugh with you.”

“I want that for you, too.” The lie passed over her lips easily, and she swallowed hard as a sick feeling settled in her stomach at the thought of him with someone else, yet again. “What if your Meant to Be is in Sweden or Germany right now, waiting for you to get there and sweep her off her feet? How unfair would it be if you missed out on her just because you were wasting time thinking about me?” Pain shot through her and she fought back fresh tears as she began to consider that – despite his words indicating the contrary – he was probably trying to let her down easy. Again. “Please don’t waste your energy on me when there could be something amazing out there for you.”

“Jenny …” His eyes narrowed as he studied her carefully. “Time and energy spent on you would never be wasted.”

“And years spent waiting for you wouldn’t be, either.”

“Point taken.” Shaking his head, he pulled her back into his chest. “I’ve got this awful feeling that I’m about to leave something really amazing behind, and no matter what I do, it’s gonna hurt. I don’t want to hurt you, Boof, but I’m afraid we’re not going to be able to avoid it.”

“I’ll be okay. I promise.” She sighed against him, determined to do whatever it took to keep him happy. “So, what do we do?”

“Well, I …” He paused, his brain skipping, desperately searching for the right thing to say. “Okay, so I think there’s potentially something else here. What do you think?”

“Agreed.” Her voice was muffled in his shirt, but he felt her nod. “Obviously.”

“But we have literally no time to see where it could go. I have no choice but to leave tomorrow and you’ve got to stay here for school. I don’t want you to miss out on anything …”

“And you shouldn’t miss out, either.”

“Sure.” A lump formed in his throat when he realized where things were going, and he tried his best to talk around it. “So how about we do like we did when I was here for the show and you were back in Bowie? We won’t be waiting on each other, but we’re going to be in contact as much as possible. I won’t be home as much, but I promise to try to split my time between Bowie and here whenever I can, or you can meet me there for a visit. Whenever we’re together, I want it to be as if I never left. And if things change for either one of us, then we just let the other know. But until that happens, please don’t hold it against me if I need to kiss you every now and again.”

“All right.” It sounded perfectly terrible, but she was grasping for whatever she could get. “We just keep on keeping on, huh?”

“Right.” His hands came back to her face, moving her so that he could meet her eyes. “And if a time comes where I’m back in the States to stay, or if you graduate and decide Europe is for you … if neither of us is attached and we still want to try, then we need to say so.” A small smile lifted his features as his thumbs brushed over her cheeks. “No matter what happens, you’re always going to be the person in my life. You’ll always be my girl. Someday, I’d love to have a chance at something amazing with you, Jen. I want to be able to take our time, enjoy each other and – if it feels right – maybe even work our way back to where we were headed tonight. But for now, the timing just doesn’t fit.”

“I understand.” Another pang shot through her, and she suddenly wondered if there would ever be a time when her heart wasn’t breaking over him. One tear trailed down her face, only stopping when it hit his fingers, and she allowed herself a brief, useless fantasy of an ending where he made his way back around to her. “Is it pathetic of me to wish that someday would hurry up and get here?”

“I hope not, because we’re in the same boat.” Leaning forward, he pressed a kiss to her forehead. “Are you all right?”

“Not really, but I’ll get there.” Her fingers ruffled his hair as she backed out of his arms, trying to give him a convincing smile as she moved over to the cushions she’d vacated earlier. “I’ll be fine, Josh. I just need some time.” I have to get over you all over again.

“Okay.” He glanced at the TV, laughing when he saw the last of the end credits scrolling across the screen. “So much for watching a movie.” His brow arched and he looked her direction. “Wanna try again?”

“Yeah. I promise not to cry all over you this time.” She cut her eyes over to him, biting back a smile as she set the video to rewind. “And I’ll do my best not to attack you again.”

“That part really wasn’t so bad, you know.” Winking at her, he reached over and took her hand, raising it to his lips. “You can attack me anytime, Boof.”

A snort preceded her laughter, the sound making him breathe easier around the knot in his chest as his gaze landed on the hand he still held. Once the movie was playing, she leaned against him as she always did, her hair falling down to tickle his arm, and he turned his hand, lacing his fingers through hers and giving a squeeze before letting them rest on his thigh. For one desperate moment, he tried to memorize the feeling of their entwined hands, knowing he’d just forfeited his chance to lay an immediate claim on this wonderful, precious, beautiful girl … and trying to get around the ugly feeling that he was making a major mistake.

******************************

“Norwegian Air flight D3584 to Copenhagen will begin boarding at Gate 16C in twenty minutes. Norwegian Air flight D3584 to Copenhagen will begin boarding at Gate 16C in twenty minutes. First class passengers please be preparing for the pre-boarding pass check.”

“That’s you guys.” Jen looked over at JC with a smile before moving to get up. “I’m gonna get hugs in before things get crazy. Be right back.” She made her way to the pair closest to the boarding area, laughing quietly as she watched Diane dig frantically through her carry-on bag for something, nodding in agreement to whatever her son was saying.

“Hey, Girlie.” Lance grinned as she approached, draping an arm over her shoulders to pull her into his side. “It’s about that time, huh?”

“Yeah, I figured I should collect hugs while people were still kind of calm.”

“So you started with the least travelled of the bunch?” His brow arched teasingly. “Smart move.”

“I started with the one I thought might need more encouragement.” She laughed and turned into him, looping her arms around his waist. “You know you’re awesome, right?”

“Before I came here, I’d probably have argued with you, but I think I’m getting there.” He tightened his hold on her, leaning down to speak softly in her ear. “I was about to quit, you know.”

“No, you weren’t.” Pulling back, her gaze darted over to see Diane nodding, then returned to him, studying his grave features. “Seriously? Why?”

“Because I wasn’t cutting it and I knew it. Half my bags were packed the night before you came to the warehouse. I’d already talked to Mom and we were going to give it a few more days, then book a flight back home if the next rehearsals didn’t go better.” His expression lightened with a small smile. “And then you swept in like some tiny Wonder Woman, tossed us into your basement with a few of your school buddies and things just magically clicked.”

“There wasn’t anything magical about it. You worked your butt off those first few months and you know it. You just needed a little extra help. Everybody does sometimes.” Her eyes narrowed at him and she poked his shoulder. “They need you, Mississippi. It wouldn’t be the same without you. And don’t you ever forget it.”

“I won’t.” He hugged her close again. “I’ve found a family here, and I’m so glad you’re part of it, Jenny.”

“Lance …” She found herself fighting back tears, trying to swallow around the lump in her throat. “Ugh, Josh is going to kill you if you make me cry.” As if he hasn’t made me cry enough. A quiet laugh escaped into his chest and she took a deep breath, leaning her cheek against him as she turned to face Diane. “Thank you both again for the print. It’ll look great in my rehearsal area.”

“I was happy with how it turned out.” Diane smiled, reaching out to place a hand on Jen’s arm. “We meant to have it for you at Christmas, but the framing took longer than expected. I wanted it to be perfect.”

“It is. I kind of feel bad about trying to get out of it.” The group photo from after their Pleasure Island showcase had turned out beautifully, and Diane had selected a gorgeous walnut framing that accented the coloring perfectly. “Thank you so much.”

“After all you’ve done for not just Lance, but for all of them, it was the least we could do.” The older woman held out a white envelope toward her. “I forgot about these when we stopped by yesterday. It’s just a few other photos I found while I was packing up last week, but I thought you’d like to have them.”

“Awesome.” She took the envelope with a grateful nod. “Thank you.” Reaching up, she ruffled Lance’s hair and smiled. “Take care of yourselves over there, okay?”

“We will. You, too, Girlie.” He leaned down to kiss her cheek. “We’ll keep in touch.”

“You’d better. I want to hear all about it.” Her hand squeezed Diane’s as she began to move away, sliding the photos into her back pocket. “See you later.”

“See you later, Jenny.”

Jen had to steady herself as she walked over to the next pair, Justin already bouncing with a grin as she approached.

“Come here, Shorty.” He didn’t wait for her, just grabbed her up in his arms and swung her around, pressing a quick kiss to the side of her head. “You doing okay?”

“Yeah, I’m all right.” She laughed, hugging his neck tightly. “Just wondering what I’m going to do without you and Joe trying to destroy my house on a daily basis, that’s all.”

“Aww, that’s so sweet.” His voice dripped with sarcasm. “I’ll miss you, too, Jenny.”

“You’re just saying that because you’re going to miss my fried chicken and spaghetti with meatballs, right?”

“Don’t remind me. You’ll get me crying and I’ll lose my man card before we even get on the plane.”

“I think you got a head start on that when you got yourself pierced.” A grin lit her features as she flipped at one of the sparkling studs. “What man wears diamonds in his ears?”

“Lots of us do, if you haven’t noticed.” He leaned down with a laugh, letting her feet hit the floor but refusing to let her back away. “I really will miss you, Jen.”

“And I’ll really miss you, too, kid.”

“I meant what I said yesterday.” Straightening up, he tightened his hands on her shoulders. “I might’ve had a crush on you to start with, but you’re the closest thing to a big sister I’ve ever had. If you need me to beat somebody down, just say so. I’ll be on the next flight home.” His eyes cut over toward where JC was sitting. “Or, you know, if I need to knock some sense into anyone in my corner of the world, I can do that, too.”

“Thanks, J. I’ll keep that in mind.” She sighed and glanced over at Lynn, who was shaking her head and rolling her eyes at her oversized son. “Don’t drive your mother crazy over there, okay? Behave yourself.”

“But it’s so hard.” The fake whine trailed off into a cough, and he squeezed her into one more hug, not noticing the look of appreciation Lynn sent toward Jen. “I’ll be a perfect angel, I promise.” He shook his head when neither of the women could hold back their laughter. “Yeah. Anyway, keep us posted, okay? We want to know all about what’s going on with you.”

“I will. I promise.” She went on her toes and still had to pull him down so she could kiss his cheek. “Later, little bro.”

“Later, Shorty.”

******************************

“You think she’s doing okay?”

JC jumped, startled, as Chris plopped down in the seat Jen had vacated a few minutes prior. “I guess so. She looked like she was getting a little teary with Lance, but she seems to be fine now.”

“Well, she’s about to get to Joey’s bunch … just look at them. I think they have an unwritten rule against sadness or something.” A dark brow rose as he glanced back at JC. “As long as you guys worked everything out last night, then it’s all good.”

“Yeah, we did.” He smiled as he watched Joey dancing with her, spinning her until she landed in his father’s arms, laughing.

“I’ll say you did.”

“Huh?” Blue eyes narrowed, focusing on his friend. “What do you mean?”

“Really?” Chris laughed. “Dude, you guys were so into it, you didn’t even hear me walking through the room.” A devilish grin lit his features. “I passed right in front of her. If she hadn’t been so focused on you, she could’ve reached out and touched me.” He shook his head. “I’ve never considered Spaceballs to be a make-out worthy flick, but maybe I’ll have to try it.”

“Chris …” JC groaned, covering his face with his hands. “That was before we talked.”

“You’re kidding.”

“No. She was upset and crying, then she started to calm down and noticed I still wear the necklace she got me when I turned sixteen …”

“Ahh. I’ve been wondering about that. Mystery solved.”

“Okay.” A confused look crossed JC’s face, but he shook it away to continue. “Anyway, one thing led to another and the next thing I know, I’m having to keep her from taking it too far.”

“Damn, Jace.”

“I know.” He groaned. “Hell, if I hadn’t pushed her away when I did, we would’ve ruined everything without thinking twice.”

“But you stopped it and you talked it out.” Chris put a hand on his shoulder. “That’s good, C. Did we end up with a happy ending?”

“Not really.” JC sighed, then smiled when he saw her giving Joey another hug and a kiss on the cheek. “I told her everything: that I thought there could be more between us, how I didn’t want to hurt her and I really didn’t know what to do about it.”

“And?”

“She said basically the same thing.” He swallowed hard as she turned away from the Fatones, walking slowly toward them. “We both think there could be something more, but neither of us wants the other to miss out on anything, either. We’re not waiting on each other, but someday, if the timing is right, we’ll give it a shot.”

“Seriously?” Chris stared at him as if he’d grown another head. “After all that, you guys are just leaving it at 'maybe someday'? What the hell are you doing?”

“I have no idea, man. I literally have no damn idea what I’m doing.” He ran a hand through his hair in frustration. “Probably screwing the entire thing up.”

“Jace, you love the girl. Lock her down. Right now. Be honest with her.” Concerned dark eyes jumped back and forth between JC and the quickly approaching Jen. “If you don’t, you’re basically telling her to find somebody else. And she will, no doubt. I’ve seen Brian’s crew around her, and Joey’s brother isn’t exactly keeping it quiet, either. They’re just waiting for you to be out of the picture.”

“We have an agreement, Chris. I can’t go back on it now.” He pasted a smile on his face as she came close, still giggling quietly over something. “Hey, Boof. You all right?”

“Joey gifted me with the Fatone Family Hedge of Protection, whatever that’s supposed to mean.” She shook her head in bewilderment. “It kind of feels like I just got served with a protective order by the mob or something.”

“Well, they are from Brooklyn, you know.” With a laugh, Chris stood up and moved toward her. “My turn, Gracie. What’ve you got for me?”

“All I’ve got are hugs today, Spazz.” A smile softened her features as he pulled her to him. “Will that be enough?”

“That’s plenty.” His lips moved against her hair before he kissed the top of her head. “You’ll be okay, right, Jenny?”

“Yeah, I’ll be fine. The spring semester’s starting up in the next few weeks, and I’ll be busy with classes and stuff. And Mom said she might be coming down to escape the snow up north, so I’ll have all kinds of distractions.” She leaned back to look at him. “Just drop a line every now and again so I know you’re still alive, okay?”

“Sure thing. Same to you.” He squeezed her tightly. “And if you figure out that file share thing, be sure to use it. You might have missed out on Song of the Year at the Grammys this year, but it still got two artist nominations. I’ll bet you’re a real contender for next year, and I want to be one of the first to hear it.”

“Yeah, I’ll get with Brian and see if he can’t help me out with that.” Her brow furrowed. “Or maybe Adam already knows how to use it. Whatever, we’ll work it out.” A quick glance over his shoulder gave her a brief glimpse of JC, checking his watch and the departure board on the wall, and she leaned in closer to Chris. “Take care of him for me. Please?”

“Of course. He’s in good hands, Gracie. We’ll do right by him.”

“I know, but …”

“But it still hurts that he’s going to be so far out of reach. I get it.” He took in her slightly distressed expression. “You’re going to wait for him, aren’t you?”

“I want to, but if that’s not what he wants, then I don’t see any reason to.” She gave an almost silent laugh. “He has a valid point about not wanting me to miss out on anything. I want that for him, too, even if a big part of me wonders if he isn’t just trying to let me down easy again.” Her eyes trailed over his shoulder once more, completely missing the alertly confused look on Chris’ face as she took in another view of JC’s profile. “I love him, but what if all the best things for him are waiting over in Europe?”

“There may be some opportunities there for him, but he’s never going to find anyone better than you, just like you’re not going to be able to find anyone else who lights up your world the way he does.” Hugging her again, he turned her slightly away. “Please don’t give up on him. He’s fighting against himself because he’s trying to do whatever’s best for you, no matter what he really wants. I still think it’s gonna work out, just maybe not today.”

“I hope you’re right, Chris. I guess we’ll just have to wait and see.” For a moment, her focus landed on the hoops and studs in his ears, and she shook her head before leaning back. “Enough about my drama. Yours was the only duffel I could get to that had any extra room, so I snuck some treats in for everybody. They’re labeled, if you don’t mind sorting them out once you get settled over there.”

“Oh, man. Already spoiling us from a distance.” Grinning, he set her away from him. “I’ve got you covered, Jenny.” Leaning in to kiss her cheek, he lowered his voice. “Now, go give him a farewell that’ll make him think twice about walking away from you.”

“Yeah, right.” She gave a short laugh, reaching up to punch him on the shoulder. “Talk to you soon, Spazz.”

“You got it, kid.”

“Norwegian Air flight D3584 to Copenhagen will begin boarding at Gate 16C in ten minutes. Norwegian Air flight D3584 to Copenhagen will begin boarding at Gate 16C in ten minutes. First class passengers please appear for pass check. All other passengers be on standby for row announcements.”

“Hey.” JC put his hat on his head and stood as she approached him, studying her carefully. “We’ve only got a few minutes …”

“Yeah.” Stopping in front of him, her gaze traveled over his face. “Do me a favor?”

“Sure.” His brow arched questioningly.

“I know they’re going to restyle you and everything, but …” She tilted her head. “Do not let them pierce your ears.”

“Hey!” Chris’ voice carried to her, making her laugh at his affronted tone.

“It’s not personal, Chris.” JC laughed quietly and reached for her hand as she kept her focus on him, her smile lighting her eyes, her cheeks turning slightly pink. “It’s just … a preference.”

“No problem, Boof.” Leaning down, he grasped the strap of his duffel with his free hand, then straightened and hitched it over his shoulder, looking around for any place that could offer a little privacy. “No piercings, no tattoos. You know how I feel about painful, sharp things.”

“Yeah, I remember. I just wanted to be sure.” She followed him as he pulled her along toward a vacant corner not far from where Lance and Diane were waiting. Once there, he tucked her against the wall, dropping his bag to the ground. “What are you doing?”

“This is the quietest place that’s close …” Shaking his head, he looked her over again. “Are you sure you’ll be all right?”

“I’ll be fine.” Her hand came to rest on his arm. “Your dreams are coming true, Josh. Enjoy every minute. Soak up all the fabulous things that are heading your way and get rid of that worry. Okay?”

“I know, I know.” He pulled her close, taking a deep breath when her arms went around his waist. “I’m gonna miss you, Jenny.”

“You’re gonna be so busy, you won’t even notice I’m not there.”

“Not a chance.”

“Josh …” She anticipated his next move, reaching up to take off his hat so the brim wouldn’t hit her in the forehead as he lifted her off the ground, dropping it next to his bag before hugging him tightly around the neck, burying her face against him. “Please … please be careful. Please stay safe.” Her chest heaved in a shuddering breath when she felt him pressing kisses into her hair. “Take care of yourself, okay?”

“I will. But you have to do the same.” His chin rested against the side of her head as he squeezed her tighter, beginning to sway back and forth. “God, it’s killing me that I have to leave you here. Who’s gonna have your back while I’m gone? Who’ll make sure you keep yourself at the top of your priorities list? Who’ll keep you from running yourself into the ground?”

“Stop. It’s gonna drive me crazy, knowing that you’re worried about me all the time.” Hugged against him as she was, she felt the outline of his necklace through his shirt and pulled back just enough to see him, her fingers pressing the pendant into his skin. “I don’t want you to worry about me, but could you just … think of me?”

“Always.” His hand came up to cover hers. “I promise.”

“That’s going against our agreement.” Her mouth curved slightly as she reminded him, the sadness in her eyes sending a jolt of pain ripping through him. “I don’t need 'always', just an 'every now and then'.” She pressed her lips to the back of his hand. “Take a sight-seeing boat trip, go up in the SkyView, meet a producer, visit a museum, record a hit song … whenever something amazing happens, or you see something you never thought you would, think of me. Because I’ll never stop believing in you, or in all the fantastic things I know you’re gonna do.”

“My God, Jen.” He closed his eyes, letting his forehead rest against hers as he lowered her to the floor. “I know what we agreed to, but to hell with it. I’m seriously close to dragging you on that plane with me.”

“Not this time. Maybe …” She thought quickly, figuring out her planned class schedule as his eyes opened to meet hers. “Maybe next spring? I know it’s a year away, but if you’re still there, I’d like to come out.”

“Yes. Definitely. Just set a date and we’ll make it work.” His teeth worked over his bottom lip, his gaze moving slowly over her features. “We could take that boat trip together.”

“That’d be nice. And maybe …” Her words were cut off when his fingers slid into her hair, tipping her head back so he could press his lips to hers. Responding to him was almost second nature by now, her arms going around his waist as she matched his every movement, all fears of being his worst anything flying out the window. Yep. Screw the agreement. I’m totally waiting for you. She smiled against him as she made the decision, going on her toes to chase after him when he tried to pull away.

His hands came to cradle her face and she reached up to wrap her fingers around his wrists, holding him to her for a few more kisses before she let him back away completely. “Wow.” A rough sigh shook his chest as he hugged her closely, shaking his head at himself. “I can’t believe I thought I could … God, I’m an idiot.”

“At least you own up to it.” Her hand went to the back of his neck, pulling him down until she could kiss him again. “Just make sure you think about that whenever Gisele or Marta tries to make a move on you.” She laughed against him, her arms going back around his waist as she pressed her face into his shirt and took a deep breath. “Or, you know, every now and again, for the heck of it.”

“Count on it.” He laughed, holding her even tighter. “I’m about to be incredibly selfish, Jenny.”

“Thank God.” Her voice was muffled by the cotton across his chest, and she tilted her head to see him. “What’s wrong with being selfish?”

“With us being so far apart, things could still change. Mr. Right could show up with perfect words and flowers and sweep you off your feet. If he does, just let me know. I’ll understand.”

“My Mr. Right will come bearing stuffed animals. I’d rather have a teddy bear than flowers.” A soft sigh escaped. “And Marta could be your Meant to Be. If it turns out that way, it’ll be okay.” A slight grimace crossed her face. “At least, I’ll do my best to pretend it is until I get over it.”

“Yeah, sounds about right for me, too. But until then …” She felt him moving, then his voice was directly beside her ear. “I still don’t think we should call it dating, because we’re really not going to see each other much, but everything in me wants to wait for you. So, wait for me, Boof. Please?”

“Yes.” Her arms tightened around him. “That’s all I wanted.”

“Thank God.” The knot in his chest suddenly released, allowing him to breathe deeply for the first time in what felt like weeks. “It might be a few years …”

“You’re worth it.” Turning slightly, she raised her chin to kiss him, almost crying in relief at the whisper of joy that fluttered in her heart when he responded. “Months, years … I don’t care how long. You’ll always be worth it.” He felt her smile before her lips caught his again. “And unless you give me a reason that I shouldn’t, please don’t hold it against me if I need to kiss you every time I see you.”

“Oh, I won’t.” His chest shook with quiet laughter at her rephrasing of his words. “And that goes both ways, you know.”

“It’d better.”

“Norwegian Air flight D3584 to Copenhagen is currently boarding first class passengers at Gate 16C. First class passengers please appear for boarding. Row announcements for all other passengers will begin momentarily.”

“Okay, you’re up next.” Putting a little space between them, she looked up at him. “There’s a gift for you in your bag. It might make the flight a little easier.”

“Thanks.” He pressed his lips to her forehead, smiling against her skin. “I left something for you on my bed. I hope it makes you think of me.”

“Always.” She repeated his promise from earlier, huddling as closely to his chest as she could and allowing herself just a brief moment of total honesty. “I love you, you know.”

“Yeah, I know.” His fingers clutched the fabric of her shirt, then he wrapped his arms tightly around her and leaned down until his cheek rested against her hair. “I love you, too, Jenny.”

Pressing her face into him, she took in a deep breath of his scent. Even though she knew he didn’t mean the words to the same extent as she, they were healing all the same. She knew he had no clue what a balm they were to her injured spirit, had no idea how they repaired the small pieces of her that had been chipped away each time she’d found herself lacking, unworthy of him. Hope sprang up in her chest, just slightly stronger than the flutter of joy from a few moments ago, and she thought that maybe she could feel a bit of the spark she’d lost so long ago trying to sputter back to life.

“Norwegian Air flight D3584 to Copenhagen is currently boarding passengers seated in rows A through G at Gate 16C. All passengers please appear for boarding.”

And now she had to let him go.

“That’s you.” Stepping away from him, she bent down to retrieve his hat, then reached up to put it on his head. “E-mail or call whenever you get a chance, okay?”

“I will.” He lifted his bag, adjusting the strap over his shoulder and checking that his boarding pass was in the side pocket before bringing his hand to her face. “It might be nice to have a message waiting when I get there.”

“I think I can do that.” She smiled, turning her cheek into his palm. “Talk to you soon?”

“Not soon enough.” Leaning down, he gave her one last kiss. As he backed away, he let his thumb stroke her skin, then felt himself freeze at the realization that he hadn’t seen the happy spark now lighting her eyes in a long time. Studying her carefully, he tried to remember when he’d seen it last. Yes, she’d been content, and he’d thought she’d been happy, but it just now became clear that the fire he’d loved about her since they were kids had been missing. When had she lost it? And why? What had happened to dim the spirit she’d always had about her?

And – looking at her now – he suddenly knew that whatever had chased it away, she’d needed him to bring it back. He fought against a grin as he thought about the gifts he’d left for her, knowing how perfect they were, hoping she’d be able to see what he’d been trying to tell her. Tugging her close, he hugged her tightly, breathing in the familiar scent of her shampoo, wondering if she could feel the quick pace of his pulse in his chest.

“Hey, Jace! Let’s go, man!”

Justin’s voice carried from the boarding line, and JC glanced over to see the rest of the guys already waiting, boarding passes ready to hand to the agent. Lowering his voice, he bent until only she could hear him. “I can’t just stay here with you, can I?”

“Nope. I wish you could, but ...” She leaned into him, squeezing him in a quick hug. “You’ve got people depending on you. And your dreams are waiting.”

But half of my dreams are right here. Groaning quietly, he let his lips graze her forehead before stepping away from her. “Okay, I’m going. I’ll see you later, Boof.”

“Go make me proud.” The way she was looking at him made his heart stutter, her smile sending a warm wave through him. “Have a safe flight, Josh.”

He could feel her eyes on him as he made his way toward the line at the counter, stepping into place behind Chris, who was sporting a rather pleased expression. With a sigh, JC pulled his pass from his bag and shifted his stance. “Not now, Chris. Please?”

“I wasn’t going to say a word, C. I think the smile you just put on Gracie’s face says it all.” Dark eyes flashed with his grin. “Happy looks good on her, man.”

“The terms of our agreement have changed.” He arched one brow, waiting for the other shoe to drop. “And?”

“And if you don’t want Joe and J making your life hell for the next sixteen hours, you might want to get that shine off your mouth.” Chris laughed under his breath, reaching out to take his pass from the agent at the counter. “Just a suggestion.”

“Right.” Automatically, he ran the tip of his tongue across his lips, groaning slightly when he tasted chocolate. Handing over his boarding pass, he glanced quickly back across the waiting area, his gaze clashing with hers as he licked his lips again. She only grinned sweetly, then laughed and waved before sending him an exaggerated wink. With a laugh of his own, he shook his head and retrieved the paperwork being held out to him, waving back at her before turning and following Chris down the hallway to board the plane, knowing full well that he was leaving his heart behind.

January 22, 1996

“Hey, Maggie?” Jen made her way through the living room, glancing up at the redhead’s bedroom door and finding it open, the room dark. “Mags? You still here?”

Suddenly, she heard music from the basement, the orchestration muffled through the floor, and walked to the door in the hallway. Pulling it open, she paused as the sound of Maggie’s voice carried up to her, clear and emotional over the track resounding through the studio.

Then I was young and unafraid
And dreams were made and used and wasted
There was no ransom to be paid
No song unsung, no wine untasted

As Maggie allowed her voice to swell with the arrangement, Jen moved down the stairs, stopping only when she could sit and watch her performing to the mirror, somehow managing to both remember the lyrics and study how her movements could accent the interpretation of the song. Whenever a hand gesture or a head position didn’t seem to work, her brow would furrow and she would adjust, seeming to make a mental note of how to improve the delivery for the next run through. The music came to an end and she gave a nod to the mirror before turning to move toward the sound system.

“Wow, Mags. That was awesome.” Jen stood and came down the rest of the stairs, grinning as her friend plopped down on the couch, pressing buttons on the remote lying on the armrest, sending the discs in the player to spinning. “Is that for one of your classes?”

“No, I’m auditioning for a show the Orlando Orchestra is putting together with my Theatre Players group. Les Miserables.” Maggie let her fingers comb through her hair as she smiled. “The rehearsals are all semester with performances in April, so if I can get a part, I’ll be able to get the director to sign off for it and it’ll count as a performance elective without actually having to take a class.”

“Really?” Jen tilted her head. “Well, if that’s what you’re auditioning with, I don’t see how they’d turn you down.”

“Thanks. We put on a small-scale version of it in high school and I played Cosette.” A grimace settled over the redhead’s features. “I don’t have that range anymore, so I thought I’d try for Fantine, Cosette’s mother.” Laughing quietly, she shrugged. “She dies in the first act, but her part is fabulous, even if I’ll have to dye my hair. No redheads in this show.” Glancing over at Jen, an idea began to form, and she picked up the remote again, skipping forward on the disc. “You know what? Listen to this.”

Both girls sat back as the song she’d selected reverberated through the room. A few lines in, Jen found herself closing her eyes, losing herself in the orchestration and lyrics, beginning to hum along as she became familiar with the melody. “This sounds different. Would it be one of your songs?”

“No, this belongs to Eponine in the second act.”

“It’s beautiful.” Taking a deep breath, Jen twisted sideways on the couch and relaxed into the cushions. “Play it again.”

“Here.” Reaching down, Maggie picked up a score book from the floor. “It’s on page fifty-two. Try a dry run.”

“Okay.” A dark brow arched questioningly as she flipped the pages, catching up quickly with the recording and following along with the sheet music. She made it through the number fairly easily, her brow furrowing whenever she had to search for the right note. “Well, I guess that wasn’t too bad. You know, for a sight read.”

“Not too bad? Girl, I’ve heard rehearsed professionals who didn’t perform it that well.” Green eyes sparked with enthusiasm. “You should come audition with me on Friday.”

“Oh, Mags, I don’t know.” Jen was already shaking her head, fear flashing in her eyes. “I’m not ready for something like that yet …”

“You need to get past your stage fright if you want to be ready for that senior showcase you’re so worried about.” Her shoulder nudged Jen’s in encouragement. “It’s just one audition. One song to learn. You’re the queen of lyrics, so you’ll memorize it in no time, and I’ll help you with the delivery.” A smile brightened Maggie’s features. “You’re almost there already, Jenny. Just a little work and we’ll have you show ready.”

“You think so?” Interest sparked in Jen’s expression. “I’m a total novice at this, you know. I’ve never been on stage unless it was to play in an instrumental ensemble.”

“Seriously, let’s get you up for an audition. It’s a huge group of performers, so the chances that either of us will get a part is kind of slim, but at least it’ll get your feet wet.” Maggie bounced in excitement. “Auditions are in a full theatre and they keep the lighting set up as if a show is running. You won’t even be able to see the director and staff. And this is a community group that’s not connected to the school. Adam is helping with the sets and plans to audition, and there’s a few other students involved, but I don’t think you’d know any of them. They’ll audition each part individually, so I promise I’ll stick with you in the wings for support.”

“Well …” Jen let her teeth work over her bottom lip as she read over the sheet music again. “Is it a large part?”

“Not really. Eponine doesn’t show up until toward the end of Act One and she dies around the middle of Act Two. She has some supporting and background vocals, the one solo song and then a duet with one of the male leads as she dies.”

“Both of these characters die?”

“Yeah, it’s not really an overly happy musical. The title translates to 'The Miserable Ones'. Or something like that.”

“Wow.” With a quick laugh, she let her fingers flip through the book. “Where’s the duet? Let’s hear it.”

“It’s on page seventy-eight.” Maggie skipped ahead on the disc. “Eponine is dying after being shot and she’s made it back to Marius just in time.”

“I love the orchestration.” Jen glanced up quickly. “The music is fabulous.”

“The Orchestra has been working on it for about six weeks and they’re ready to begin full rehearsals. The crew has been building sets about that long, so we’re finally to the point where casting can begin.” Reaching out, Maggie’s hand gripped Jen’s arm. “Do this with me. Please?”

“I …” Brown eyes met green, and she sighed, feeling herself caving. “Okay. Let’s get to work.”

*********************

Hey guys,

So, Jen’s audition is today and she just walked into her office with the sleeve of that plaid shirt she’s always wearing wadded up in her hand, looking totally wigged out. I went to the laundry room and found the rest of it in pieces on top of the dryer.

What gives? Is this like a make-or-break thing for her?

If anybody gets this in the next few minutes, give me a call.

- Mags

“God, Girlie.” Lance’s eyes widened as he read over the message that had just popped up in his inbox. At the sound of footsteps in the hallway, he leaned back in his chair to see Justin headed for the stairs. “Hey, J. Where’s Jace?”

“I think he’s already downstairs. We’re supposed to be out of here in fifteen minutes.” Justin glanced down at his watch. “Make that ten. Get a move on, Bass.”

“Yeah, I’m coming.” Leaving the computer powered up, he grabbed his jacket from the bed and jogged down the hallway, then bounded down the stairs, passing up his younger friend.

“Dude, what’s your deal?”

“Jace needs to call Maggie before we leave.”

“What? Why?”

“Hey, C …” As the two made their way into the living room, Lance spoke quickly. “Jen’s audition is today and that flannel shirt of hers just went to pieces in the dryer. Call Maggie.”

“Damn.” JC shook his head as he moved into the kitchen and picked up the phone, his thumb flying over the numbers. “She must be freaking out.”

“Hey.” Before it could ring twice, Maggie’s voice came over the line. “Please tell me this is a pop star wannabe who’s got the answers to fixing my friend.”

“Well, I think I might.” His voice shook with laughter. “Is she there?”

“Yeah. Hang on.” A light thumping sound was in the background as she skipped down the stairs, then came the rapping of knuckles knocking on a door. “Hey, Jen? Jace is on the phone.”

“What?” Jen’s voice was muffled at first, then more clear as the phone changed hands. “Josh?”

“Hey, Boof. How’re you doing?”

“Well, I … uh …”

“It finally fell apart, didn’t it?”

“Y-yeah.” Her voice was puzzled, and he could picture her shaking her head. “How did you …”

“I’ve only got a few minutes, so let’s fix it.” He interrupted with a smile, leaning against the wall beside the phone base. “Go to my room, okay?”

“Okay.” She still sounded confused, but he could hear her moving. “Why?”

“Because I noticed the fraying on that shirt last year and knew this would happen.” He heard her opening a door. “Are you there?”

“Yeah.” A deep breath carried over the line. “Now what?”

“Go to the dresser and open the third drawer.”

“The third drawer?”

“Yep.” The drawer scraped as she pulled it open. “Take your pick. I thought you’d probably like the purple one, but green would look good, too. Or you know my favorite color on you is blue.”

“Josh …” She laughed and he could imagine her reaching into the drawer, her fingers testing the softness of the variety of flannel shirts. “Did you actually wear these?”

“I had to have something when I gave you that other one, so I bought new after I got moved for the Club. They were shorter than I like to wear after that last growth spurt and Mom had them in a stack for Goodwill, but I rescued a few for you. I’m pretty sure they’re worn out enough to be as comfortable as that old one.”

“You’re the best, you know.”

“Just watching out for my girl.” He glanced at the clock on the wall. “We’re meeting a new choreographer in twenty minutes, so we need to get on the road.” Clearing his throat, he lowered his voice. “Are you wearing your necklace?”

“Uh huh.” She reached up toward her neck, her fingers playing with the silver-plated heart engraved with a J, one of the gifts he’d left for her to find after seeing him off a few weeks ago. “Every day.”

“Good.” A smile lifted his tone. “You’re going to be amazing today, Jenny. Wear your new shirt, keep that necklace on and put on your bracelet. It’ll be like I’m right there with you. Just let me know how it goes. Okay?”

“I will.” Her sigh carried to him and his heart skipped a beat. “Thank you so much.”

“No problem.”

“Yo, Jace! Get a move on!” Joey’s voice boomed from the living room. “Tell Hot Stuff good luck from all of us and let’s hit it!”

“I guess you heard that.” He laughed quietly. “I’ve gotta go. Have a good day and I’ll talk to you later.”

“Tell the Funky Bunch hi for me. And have fun dancing tonight.” The grin was obvious in her tone. “Talk to you later.”

*********************

“I don’t sound anything like that.” She gripped Maggie’s hand as they stood in the stage right wing, shaking her head as the girl on stage worked her way through the required audition piece in a fashion almost identical to the previous ten girls. “And I definitely don’t look like that. There’s no way I’m getting this part.”

“Don’t count yourself out, Jen. You’re fantastic. You just need to have the confidence to show everyone else.” Maggie smiled, stepping closer to give her a supportive hug. “You’ve got this. Just pretend we’re back in the studio and you’re staring at yourself in the mirror with Brian and Adam making those faces at you.” Both girls laughed quietly. “Okay, she’s finishing up. Deep breaths.”

“Here we go.” Taking a cleansing breath, Jen closed her eyes, letting it out slowly as she listened to the music ending, the seemingly obligatory polite smattering of applause echoing in the backstage area. “I can do this.”

“Of course you can.” Reaching into her pocket, Maggie pulled out a scrap of the ruined shirt from that morning. “I know Jace gave you a new shirt, but this might help, too. Give me your arm.” Very quickly, she tied the strip around Jen’s wrist, then pulled down the sleeve of the purple shirt to hide it. “There, it’s like he’s all around you, isn’t it?”

“Yeah, he is …”

“Thank you, Emily. Next Eponine, please!”

“That’s you. I’ll be on the other side when you’re done, just exit the stage straight across from where we are now and you won’t be able to miss me. Go knock ’em dead, girl.” An excited grin lit the redhead’s face. “Do yourself proud.”

With another deep breath, Jen straightened her shoulders and walked out to center stage, blinking in the bright lights and sighing in relief when she realized that it was impossible to see anything past the front of the stage. Clearing her throat, she nodded toward the center of the room and stated her name as the others before her had done. “Jen Lawson.”

A moment later, she closed her eyes as the music began, centering herself into the character that Maggie had been introducing her to for the last four days. As she opened her mouth and began to sing, she lost herself in Eponine – the lonely girl who hid behind a brave attitude, willing to do anything for the friend who had her heart, only to have him fall in love with her polar opposite. Her eyes came open, focusing on the darkness before her as she told the story, relaying the thoughts of the poor thieves’ daughter, pouring out her heart to the man she loved while walking alone through a rainy Paris night to deliver a note to the girl who’d stolen his affections.

As if on autopilot, she moved around in the area lit by the stage lights, allowing her body language and expressions to give life to the piece. Her head tilted back and her hands clasped to her chest as she came to the heartbreaking crescendo and she could almost feel the energy draining out of her, a tear rolling down her cheek as she finished with the quiet admission of one-sided love, the music fading away as the orchestration came to a close.

For a moment, there was nothing but silence, and she blinked in surprise that it was already over, reaching up to wipe the tear away. Looking from side to side, she tried desperately to remember which way she was supposed to exit, relief crashing over her when she caught a quick glimpse of red hair in the left wing. Before she could take the first step toward the safety of her friend, thunderous applause filled the auditorium, the tidal wave of noise freezing her where she stood. Wide brown eyes searched the rows of seats behind the lights, whistles and cheers cutting through the darkness toward her.

“Jenny!” Maggie’s voice came through the racket. “Take a bow!”

She obeyed, bending slightly at the waist and giving a nod to the not-so-empty auditorium, just barely able to hear the director’s dismissal over the din. A smile was forming as she left the stage, the noise still echoing through the building. Once safely behind the curtain, she grasped Maggie’s hands and began bouncing up and down with giddy laughter. “I did it! I did it!”

“Come on, let’s get out of the way.” Shaking her head with a smile, Maggie pulled Jen further away from the stage, beginning to laugh herself when she saw the childish glee on her friend’s face. “Jen, do you hear that? They love you. You’re amazing.” Green eyes glanced back toward the stage, where the next singer was taking her place, looking their direction with a nod and a thumbs up before turning to face the auditorium, shrugging as she gave her name. “I think you just set the bar, girl.”

As the music began again, a door opened next to where they stood and Adam came through, a bright grin on his face when he found them. “Jen, that was awesome!” His arms went around her in a tight hug. “You even had the guy next to me crying. If you aren’t our Eponine, then somebody’s paid off the director.”

“I-I … wow.” Jen smiled against him as her brain still tried to process what had just happened. He released her and she stepped away, her fingers playing with the fabric tied around her wrist. “All I wanted was to prove to myself that I could get through one song on a stage without losing it. If I actually got the part …”

“We’ll cross that bridge when we get to it. Right now, I think we need to celebrate the little victories.” Maggie turned to Adam. “What do you think? Can we tear Brian and Nick away from the studio to go for some pizza?”

“Actually …” He glanced down at his watch. “I think they should be home by now. I’ll run to the office and call to see if they’ll meet us. Gino’s?”

“Ooh, breadsticks. Yeah, definitely Gino’s.”

“Okay. Be right back.”

After he left, Maggie turned her focus back to Jen, who was still staring at the strip of fabric, her brow furrowing. “Jen? Are you okay?”

“I wish he was here, Mags.” Jen’s voice was quiet as she pulled the purple shirt tighter across her body. “I just … I just really wish he was here right now.”

“I know.” Maggie hugged her, trying not to get choked up at her friend’s faint sniffles. “And I know that he’d much rather be here than where he is.”

“Well, I don’t know if I’d go that far.” A watery laugh escaped as Jen’s arms came around to return the hug. “I’m just missing him. More than I thought I would.”

“Send him an e-mail tonight and tell him all about this. He’ll be so proud of you.”

“Yeah, I will.” Jen stepped away, shaking her head as she wiped away her tears. “Look at me. This was so awesome and here I am crying because I’m missing some guy. Mom would be smacking the back of my head.”

“He’s not just some guy, Jen. He’s your guy.” A red eyebrow arched as Jen opened her mouth. “Don’t bother denying it. You two complete each other and if he’s got any sense in that head of his, he’ll be coming home real soon.”

“They don’t know when they’ll be back. Maybe in the spring. April or May?”

“That would be perfect.” Maggie smiled and draped an arm over Jen’s shoulders. “Put a bug in his ear about getting back here in April. Then you get this part and your boys will make it home in time to see you being fabulous on stage.”

“There’s no guarantee of any of that, but it’d be really cool if they could be here, whether I get the part or not.” Letting out a long breath, Jen felt a smile forming again. “How many shows are there, anyway?”

“Every weekend after Easter. Friday and Saturday nights, matinees on Sundays except for the last weekend. It’s a Thursday night show for that week.”

“Wow. I guess that’d be a quick cure to my stage fright, huh?” A spark of excitement lit her eyes. “This was really fun, Mags. I loved getting to pretend to be someone else for a while.”

“Well, like Adam said, they’d be crazy not to cast you.” Maggie looked up when he came back through the doorway. “Hey. Were they home?”

“Yep. They’ll meet us there. Mark, too.” He sent an apologetic look in Jen’s direction. “Sorry. I know he gives you weird vibes, but he’d just walked in and they couldn’t not invite him.”

“It’s all right. Just make sure he’s not next to me, okay?” Jen bit her lip. “I’m sure he’s a perfectly nice guy, but there’s something about him that doesn’t sit right.”

“No problem. Maggie will be on one side, I’ll take the other and we’ll put Nick across from you.” His gaze bounced between the two girls. “Ready to go?”

“We rode together and we’re in the back lot, so we’ll see you there.”

“Sure.”

They split up on the sidewalk outside the back entrance to the theater and the girls chatted animatedly as they walked toward Jen’s Tracker. As they came close to the car, Jen’s eyes narrowed when she noticed something laying across her driver’s side windshield wiper. “What’s that?”

“It’s a rose.” Maggie smiled, coming up beside her as she picked it up. “Someone must’ve wanted to wish you good luck.”

“Who’d leave me a rose?” Brow furrowed, Jen twirled the flower in her fingers, searching for any clues. “I can’t think of anybody who'd leave me flowers. Maybe it's supposed to be for you. Did Brian know we were riding together?”

“Yeah, he knew, but I’m allergic to roses, so it wouldn’t be for me.” Maggie shrugged and moved around the car to open the passenger side door. “I guess you’re just becoming little Miss Popular, aren’t you?”

“Ugh, no. Unless being Miss Popular gets me free pizza. Then I’m all in. Otherwise …” Jen paused with a laugh, laying the rose on the dash as she turned the key in the ignition. “God, I hope not.”

*********************

“Okay, so Chris is still convinced that You’re Still the One could be the next big thing for you.”

“Really?” Jen smiled, twisting back and forth in her chair as his voice carried over the speaker phone on the desk. “What do you think?”

“I’ve got three more discs to go through, but I’m really liking Whiskey Lullaby.” He sighed, and she could picture him relaxing back on his bed, one arm behind his head, the phone cradled to his ear. “There’s not a story sheet for it in my binder, though.”

“That was one of the last masters we were able to finish before you left, so I didn’t get a chance to add it.” Leaning back in the chair, she propped her feet on the corner of the desk and closed her eyes, grinning as she imagined him leafing through the pages of stories that accompanied the CDs she’d hidden in his bag the morning of his flight. She’d taken the time to type out the journal entries and memories, then printed out the sheet music for each song, compiling it into a large binder. And she hadn’t been able to resist getting him a new Discman with sound-canceling headphones to go with it. “I was able to get most of the tracking done on my own, but Brian had to pull a few strings to get the folks we needed to record it. We were really lucky that Adam was hanging around that day.”

“Yeah, I love that it’s a duet. You guys blend really well together.” She heard him clearing his throat, then shifting on his mattress. “But what’s the story, Boof?”

“Well, when we were out decorating Gram’s headstone last spring, I noticed a willow tree in the far corner of the cemetery and went to check it out. There were two headstones hidden under the vines. They were both heart-shaped, with angels etched around the names. It struck me as odd that they had the same last name but were separated. I thought if they’d been married, then surely they’d have shared one headstone. So that made me wonder if something had happened between them – maybe they’d gotten divorced or something – and that’s why they weren’t together.” Taking a deep breath, she let the memory resurface. “Then I saw the bottles of whiskey sitting on the base of each stone. They weren’t opened and looked like they’d been there a long time, maybe even as long as the stones had been there. The date on the guy’s stone had him passing away in 1972. The woman died about two years later. Neither of them were that old. Mid-thirties.”

“Wow.”

“I know. It didn’t look like there’d been any decorations there in a long time, so I figured that they probably hadn’t had family left in the area. By the time we got home, I was already blocking out a whole scenario around those whiskey bottles and a pair of broken hearts. It didn’t take too long to finish it.”

“I know you did the acoustic work, but is that a fiddle in there, too?”

“Yep.” She laughed quietly. “I’ve met a lot of new people since December.”

“I’ll say.” His grin was obvious over the line. “It still cracks me up that you’re so good at country music.”

“Well, I guess you can blame Lance.” Her fingers played with the edge of the CD case lying on the edge of the desk. “After he heard Commitment, he lent me some stuff by Martina McBride and George Strait and got me hooked on the style.”

“Whatever works, Boof. You know …”

“Hey, Jen!” Before he could say anything else, there was a quick knock at the door, then it burst open as Maggie came dancing into the room. “Girl, check your e-mail!”

“What?” Jen’s feet hit the ground as she sat up. “Why?”

“The director got an early start on notifications.” Maggie hopped in place. “Guess who gets to die a fabulous death in Act One?”

“Really? That’s awesome, Mags!” Standing up, Jen gave her a quick hug. “Congratulations.”

“Congrats, Maggie.” JC’s voice shook with laughter as it carried into the room. “How exactly are you going to make dying fabulous?”

“Oh, hey, Jace.” Casting a sheepish look toward her friend, she mouthed a silent apology. “Don’t you know by now that I make everything fabulous?” Rolling her eyes, she shook her head. “Anyway, get to it, Jenny. Let’s see the good news.”

“Okay, okay.” Jen sat back down, bringing the computer to life and opening her inbox. “Just … don’t get your hopes too high, all right?” The mouse hovered over the director’s message. “There were a lot of girls there with a lot more experience.”

“And not one of them brought the house down like you.” Maggie’s toe tapped impatiently. “Open it!”

“Okay, here goes.” Taking a deep breath, she opened the message and read the text slowly, her eyes widening in surprise as she sat back in stunned silence.

“She just went quiet, and that could go either way.” His tone was inquisitive. “Help me out, Mags. Which is it?”

“Hang on.” Leaning over Jen’s shoulder, she read the paragraphs quickly. “Oh, she got it. She totally got the part. As if they’d have gone with anyone else. You should’ve seen her, Jace. She was perfect.” Letting out a quick laugh, her eyes ran over the short sentences at the bottom of the screen. “And get this. The director says the decision to cast her was immediate and unanimous across the board. He’s eager to work with her and hopes that her experience with our group is gratifying.”

“I got it.” Jen’s voice was a little detached and her skin took on a slightly green tinge. “They actually cast me. I-I think I’m gonna be sick.”

“Okay, we’re in musical theater, not opening for Alice Cooper.” Maggie reached for the trash can as a precaution. “This is a great thing, Jenny. You were fantastic. The best one for it. Remember how much fun you had?”

“Yeah. It was a blast.” Her head shook back and forth. “I’m just not used to … to being the center of attention.”

“Well, you’ll have months of rehearsals to get used to it. Just think of how good it’ll be for you. And you’ll be earning a performance elective credit, to boot.” The redhead raised her voice so he couldn’t help but hear her. “Consider this your warning, C. Shows are the last three weekends in April. You need to make sure your butt is in one of those seats so you can see your girl do her thing.” A sigh escaped. “Bring the Goof Troop with you, if you must.”

“I hear you. I’ll do what I can.” Concern sharpened his voice. “Boof? How’re you holding up?”

“I’ll be okay.” With a deep breath, she sat back in her chair. “I’m just freaking out right now, but it’ll be fine.”

“Hey, Maggie? Think I could have her back?”

“Sure.” Maggie sent a wink Jen’s direction, a knowing smile lighting her features as she headed for the door. “Later, Jace.”

“Later.” He waited until he heard the door close before he continued. “Go ahead and take me off speaker, Jenny.”

Leaning forward, she picked the cordless unit off the base, pressing the button to activate the handset. “All right.”

“Are you okay? Be honest.”

“I’m terrified.” Her hands trembled as she shook her head. “What if I can’t repeat what they liked so much? What if the whole thing was a fluke and I completely blow it? What if …”

“Hey, hey. Stop psyching yourself out. You’re going to be wonderful.” She heard him sigh. “Apparently, you’ve already been wonderful. I wish I could’ve seen it.”

“I kinda fell apart after it was over, wishing you were here.” Her nose wrinkled a bit at the admission. “But it’s okay, Josh. Like I said, I’ll get used to it.”

“I’m so sorry, Boof.” His regret was clear. “Is Coda close enough to grab?”

“Yeah.” She reached out to retrieve the stuffed white bear with patches of black fabric printed with a rainbow of musical symbols accenting his paws and a multicolored treble clef on his overstuffed belly, cuddling him to her chest. With a quiet laugh, she pressed her cheek into the soft fur on top of the bear’s head. “He pretty much lives on my desk, unless I take him upstairs with me.”

“Well, go ahead and give him a hug for me.”

“I already am.”

“Good. Squeeze him extra tight, okay?” An unusual roughness entered his voice. “God, I wish I was there with you right now.”

“I know. Me, too.” Another laugh escaped. “Sucks, huh?”

“Like hell.” He took a deep breath. “You know I can’t guarantee that I’ll make it, but I promise to do my absolute best to get home for your show.”

“All I need is to know you’ve tried.” Her finger traced the stitching on Coda’s belly. “Anything more than that is just a bonus.” Brown eyes drifted over to the clock on the wall. “I should let you go. It’s nearly one o’clock where you are.”

“It’s all right.” She could hear him fighting back a yawn. “I’m good.”

“You’re going to be asleep in five minutes.” Her voice trembled with humor. “Go to bed, Josh.”

“I’m already in bed.” His grin carried over the line. “Comfy under the covers, lights out, talking to my favorite person.”

Her gaze traveled over to the framed photograph that Coda usually sat next to and she couldn’t help her smile. The bear had been sitting on his bed when she made it back in from the airport, a little tag tied around his foot: Whenever you start missing me, just hug this guy as tight as you can. The box holding her necklace had been cradled in his lap, a folded piece of paper tucked inside: Wear this every day and think of me. Lying next to him on the comforter had been the photo of the two of them after he’d helped her off the stairs at Pleasure Island, a sticky note attached to the frame: Kissing you is amazing, but this is what I’m going to miss the most.

She hadn’t needed to look twice to know what he meant. That photo made her question any doubts she’d ever had about possibly being right for him. The way they smiled at each other with their foreheads touching, her hands on his face as his arms held her tightly … even in print, it was glaringly obvious that there was more between them than friendship. Much more.

Besides, her Mr. Right would bring stuffed animals, wouldn’t he? Coda had already been laying on his bed when they’d said their goodbyes at the airport. Jen couldn’t help but grin as her fingers rubbed across the bear’s fur. Either JC was a mind reader, or he knew her better than she’d thought.

“Yeah, you’re my favorite person, too.” She bit her lip when she heard his breathing deepen. “Get some sleep and I’ll talk to you later.”

“Uh huh.” His tone gave away how close to sleep he really was. “’Night, Boof.”

“’Night, Josh.”

----------------------------------------

February 14, 1996

“Somebody’s wasting a lot of money.” Jen shook her head as she lifted the rose off her windshield, twirling it between her fingers for a moment before choosing another car to leave it on and heading toward her next class. The flower she’d found after her audition last month had only been the first, one flower – or sometimes two or three – showing up on her car each week since. She’d find them between classes, when she’d stop by her car to swap bags before heading into the Music building for sessions with Brian, and there was never a hint as to who they were from.

She’d sent Chris a message, asking if he or the guys knew anything. None of them were involved and none of the people in her circle of friends had any reason to be leaving her the gifts. After the first few, she’d come to the conclusion that someone was mistaking her car for someone else’s and began passing them on, hoping they’d land on the vehicle they were really intended for.

If nothing else, she had to applaud the persistence.

Three hours later, the answer was lying underneath a full dozen roses that had been delivered to the hood of the Tracker. The card was pristine, with crystal clear calligraphy addressing the gift to Alexis.

“Ah. Yeah, no Alexis here.” Picking up the bouquet and card, she quickly scanned the other vehicles in the lot, looking for anyone driving a similar model to hers. Walking down the next row, she focused on a small black SUV with a vanity plate sparkling with the letter A.

A blonde girl walking down the opposite side of the lane crossed over, heading for the vehicle, and Jen sped up, hoping to catch her before she left. “Excuse me! Is your name Alexis?”

“What?” The girl’s head turned in surprise, her eyes widening as Jen approached with the flowers. “Yes. I’m Alexis.”

“I’m pretty sure these are for you.” A relieved smile spread across Jen’s face as she handed over the bouquet. “I think someone’s been mistaking my car for yours. They’ve been leaving single roses for the past couple of weeks, but they didn’t say who they belonged to.”

“Oh, wow.” Alexis took the flowers, her fingers working on the flap of the envelope until she could pull out the card to read it. “Aw, he’s so sweet!”

“You wouldn’t happen to be working on a production with the Orlando Orchestra, would you?”

“I play the violin.” Blue eyes focused on her, sparking in recognition. “You’re in the cast, aren’t you?”

“Yep.” Jen shook her head and laughed. “I think you might want to make sure he knows which car is yours. And tell him that I’m sorry about all the others. I’m hoping they went to good homes.”

“Thank you so much.” Alexis sent her a bright smile, holding the roses just a little tighter. “I’ll be sure to let him know.”

Just in case, Jen laid a note on her dash, making sure anyone standing outside would know that she was Not Alexis. Two days later, a large artificial sunflower was on her windshield, with a tag thanking her for straightening out the mix-up. She couldn’t help her smile when she read that Alexis and Ben were now making beautiful music together.

Backing out of the parking spot, she never noticed the rose left mangled by the driver’s side front tire.

----------------------------------------

April 26, 1996

The sky was sparkling with stars as he pushed through the door, thanking the heavens that he’d remembered his keys, and cringed as the alarm began beeping in the hallway. Quickly, his fingers flew over the code and he sighed when all was quiet again. Making sure the door was locked behind him, he reset the alarm and headed toward his bedroom, blinking wearily in the darkness.

A dim light shone through the doorway and his brow furrowed until he stepped into the room, his gaze immediately focusing on the glowing bathroom light, then turning to the bed. A smile formed when he found her laying there, curled on her side, shivering a bit as she burrowed into the comforter.

Letting his duffel drop to the floor, he walked to the bedside and leaned over her, his fingers brushing the hair out of her face. “Jenny?” She gave no response, a sigh lifting her chest as she pressed her face deeper into the pillow. With a quiet laugh, he kissed her forehead and moved around the bed, kicking off his shoes and tossing his jacket onto the chair in the corner.

He almost groaned in relief as he settled onto the comforter, his eyelids becoming extremely heavy the instant his head came down on the pillow, only to become slightly more alert when she moved next to him. Taking a deep breath, she rolled over and into his arms, never coming awake as she hugged him around the waist and snuggled herself to him, her cheek settling against his chest.

Every ounce of the tension he’d been carrying since being notified of the cancellation of his morning flight drained away, having her in his arms suddenly making the stressful rush to book and make a late flight from D.C. entirely worth it. She shivered again and his hold tightened on her, pulling her closer to his chest as he reached across to tug the comforter over them both, creating a cocoon of soft warmth. He tilted his head down to inhale the floral scent of her shampoo and finally relaxed completely, drifting to sleep as she breathed against him.

What seemed like minutes later, he felt her suddenly tensing in his arms and knew that she was waking up. Wearily, he opened his eyes to find her blinking sleepily in confusion, staring at his chest. “Hey, Boof. I’m home.” With a tired smile, he pressed a kiss to the top of her head. “Do you have class today?”

“No … no classes today. If I have my way, I’ll never have another Friday class.” Her brow furrowed as she shook her head, raising her eyes to meet his. “How are you here? I wasn’t expecting to see you until after your showcase thing tonight.”

“Morning flight got canceled, so I had to rebook for a late flight with a layover in Knoxville. Got in a little after three.” His arms squeezed her as his eyes closed again. “The others are all getting into town at different times, so we’re not meeting up until just before we have to be at the high school for a warmup.” He arched his back in a stretch, moving her with him. “What time do you need to be at the theater?”

“I have to appear for makeup and wardrobe by six.” The warmth of his body was tempting, but she kept her gaze on his relaxed features. “You did say you wanted seven tickets for tomorrow night, right?”

“Yep. Diane and Lynn wanted to come, too.” He let his fingers comb through her hair. “If you don’t have to be anywhere until six, how about we just nap for a few more hours and then head out for some lunch?”

“Sounds perfect.” She settled back against him, one hand reaching to touch his face. Brown eyes lit with a smile when he turned to kiss her palm, his eyes blinking open to look down at her, and she scooted herself closer to him, brushing her lips against the side of his chin. “I’m so glad you’re here.”

“Me, too, Jenny.” A sigh rattled through his chest as he hugged her tightly, his lips moving against her forehead as his heavy eyelids lost their battle, quickly falling closed as sleep returned. “Me, too.”

April 27, 1996

“Seriously?” Joey’s eyes widened as they made their way into the theater, following Brian down the center aisle until they found a section of seats large enough for all of them to sit together. “She went from not wanting to be in front of people at all to this?”

“Guess so. Maggie’s a miracle worker.”

“And why are we here so early?” Justin spoke up, stepping into a row close to the stage. “It doesn’t start for another hour.”

“Every show sold out, J.” JC sighed as he took the seat next to him. “It’s closing night. If Jen hadn’t reserved tickets for us, we wouldn’t have been able to make it in. Personally, I wanted a seat where I could actually see her.”

“If you’ll look around, dearest, you’ll see that we just beat the crowd coming in.” Lynn leaned forward from the row behind them, thumping her son on the back of the head before gesturing to the streams of people entering the doors. “Pay attention.”

“Hey, Jace. I thought she said it wasn’t a major role.” Chris glanced up from where he was flipping through the program. “She’s got, like, sixth billing. Cast photo and everything.”

“You’re kidding.” He turned to the section holding the cast listing and smiled when he found her on the second page, just below Maggie. “Well, look at that. Good for you, Boof.”

“Why do you call her that, anyway?” A dark brow arched in his direction. “Boof? It’s not exactly a common nickname.”

JC simply looked at him, a deadpan expression on his face.

“Not today, huh?” Chris laughed, tapping the program against his knee. “Okay, so how about the teddy bear? You could’ve gotten a bear from anywhere, but you literally found one in the gift shop out front. Really? Roses probably would’ve been nice, you know.”

Yeah, but her Mr. Right will come bearing stuffed animals. And God, I’m hoping she knows that I’m her Mr. Right. He kept his thoughts to himself and shook his head, grinning down at the fluffy brown bear in his lap with a quiet laugh. “Not today, Chris.”

Trying to ignore the usual banter from the friends surrounding him, JC let his gaze travel over the theater, a feeling of awe settling in as he took in the impressive auditorium. He could only estimate that there were enough seats for about two thousand people. If every show had sold out … a smile began to form as he studied the balcony, pride blooming in his chest at how far she’d come in the last few months. According to Maggie, Jen’s performances had garnered the best crowd response, earning more than one standing ovation during curtain call.

Knock ’em dead, Jenny.

Before he knew it, the seats were full and the orchestra had completed its warmup, the house lights dimming to darkness as the stage lights came up and the curtain rose to reveal the detailed set pieces. The music drew him in and he completely forgot who was sitting next to him until he felt an elbow in his side.

“Dude, is that Maggie?” Justin leaned over to whisper in his ear. “She’s totally different as a brunette.”

Cutting a glance toward his friend, he nodded, then turned his attention back to the stage. A little while later, he was chuckling under his breath as she did, in fact, manage to present a fabulous death. There was a sniffle and a shifting in the row behind him, and he looked back to see Lance passing tissues between Diane and Lynn. Lance’s expression held an ounce of humor as his eyes met JC’s and he simply shrugged with a grin before focusing back on the actors.

Not too much longer and there she was, notably smaller than the others around her, dressed in worn greyish-brown pants and a stained white sleeveless blouse, her hair pulled up and covered by an old-fashioned men’s hat. Even as she was obviously part of the group of characters, their placement on the stage had her clearly apart from the crowd, her shoulders tilted confidently, her chin raised with a rakish grin as she flirted with Adam, who was playing her friend and love interest. JC wasn’t prepared for the streak of jealousy that passed through him as she gazed at Adam with a look of pure adoration and he could feel his grip tightening on the bear he’d bought her.

Cool it, man. It’s just a play. Not real. He swallowed thickly, trying to relax his fingers on the soft fur. If it was real, she would’ve told you.

Adam’s character sent Jen off stage, presumably to search for the blonde girl who’d crossed the stage earlier with the male lead, and Chris leaned close to his ear. “She’s a convincing little actress, isn’t she?” Blue eyes turned to him just in time to see his glance drop to where JC was still clutching the bear. “But it’s just a show, Jace. I’ve seen her giving you that look more often than you probably realize. She wasn’t playing a part with you.” Chris’ brow lifted questioningly. “You okay?”

“Yeah.” With a deep breath, JC relaxed into his seat, eased by the reassurance. “I’m fine.”

She returned to the stage to participate in one of the most popular group numbers, the audience reacting to its familiarity. Then she grabbed Adam’s hand and led him off stage, the set pieces turning so that she could deliver him to the girl she’d located. A little music and suddenly she was standing apart again, participating in the scenes, but something of an observer, chiming in with her thoughts though no one else acknowledged that she was there. Her voice rang out between the others, rich with sadness and heartbreak as the couple came together, leaving her in the cold to protect them from the gang of thieves that dragged her off stage as she let out a scream that shot straight to his spine and made both Justin and Chris jump in their seats.

The next time she was visible, her arms and face had been dusted with just enough stage makeup to give the impression that she’d endured a beating, a tattered trench coat gripped in her hands as she joined in with the Act One closer. The cast held the last harmonies, allowing the orchestra to take them to the end of the piece, then froze in place, the heavy stage curtain slowly descending as the audience applauded their efforts during the first half of the program.

“Jace …” As the lights came up for the intermission, Lance leaned forward and placed a hand on JC’s shoulder. “She’s fantastic. The people behind us were already talking about her when she first came on stage. They’ve been here every weekend and keep saying that she’s better every time.”

“Did anybody else know she could scream like that?” Justin’s eyes widened. “Dear God, she’s got a set of pipes hidden in that little body.”

“Oh, just you wait.” Brian stood at the end of the row, reaching up to stretch out his shoulders as he smiled at JC. “She hasn’t hit her stride yet.”

“Excuse me.” An older woman sitting in the row ahead of them turned around, her gaze bouncing between the guys. “Are you boys here for the little brunette?”

“Yes, ma’am.” Chris sent her a friendly smile. “She’s a very good friend of ours. We’ve been out of town, so this is the first chance we’ve had to see the show.”

“Oh, goodness, we just love her.” A happy grin lit her features. “Jenny is our granddaughter’s piano teacher over at the Community Center in the University area. Chelsea is simply besotted with her. She was so excited when we brought her last weekend for the Sunday matinee.” Her elbow nudged the man sitting next to her. “We enjoyed it so much, we came back for a date night. An absolute star, our Jen.” The lights flickered in warning that the intermission was ending. “That girl does so much for the children at the Center, and she doesn’t even realize what a gift she is. If you talk to her later, please tell her that the McKameys said hello.”

“We definitely will.” JC took his seat as the house lights began to dim, looking around as an enthusiastic twitter began to stir through the auditorium. “Something exciting about to happen?”

“Wait for it.” Mrs. McKamey noticed the bear in his lap and winked with a knowing smile, reaching over her seat to pat his knee before turning around. “You haven’t seen anything yet, son. Your girl’s just getting started.”

The heavy curtain lifted to show Adam and a few other men in front of a wall of debris, talking among themselves until Jen moved across the stage, now wearing the trench coat. A brief conversation ensued, with the men telling the stupid girl to get out of there, she’d be shot. In a quick decision, Adam reached in his pocket and handed her a note, asking her to deliver it to the blonde – an attempt to both get his friend out of danger and let his love know what was happening.

The set moved to the side – cast and all – as a painted curtain descended between Jen and the men, giving the stage a backdrop of a city bridge and streetlights. The orchestra transitioned into her lead-in, and she began to sing the opening phrases, glancing down at the note in her hand before slipping it into her coat pocket and walking slowly toward center stage, making it to the middle of the curtain as the introduction ended. The music brightened, a smile gracing her lips as she stepped lightly in front of the bridge. Closing her eyes, she hugged herself as she let her imagination take control.

On my own, pretending he’s beside me
All alone I walk with him till morning
Without him I feel his arms around me
And when I lose my way
I close my eyes and he has found me

Twinkle lights embedded in the curtain began to sparkle delicately, and she looked upward, stretching out a hand toward the stars flickering in her description.

In the rain the pavement shines like silver
All the lights are misty in the river
In the darkness, the trees are full of starlight
And all I see is him and me, forever and forever

And suddenly, the orchestration became heavy, the smile leaving her face as her hands slid into her pockets. The stars lost their twinkle, going dark as reality came rushing to her.

And I know it’s only in my mind
That I’m talking to myself and not to him
And although I know that he is blind
Still I say, there’s a way for us

I love him, but when the night is over
He is gone, the river’s just a river
Without him, the world around me changes
The trees are bare and everywhere
The streets are full of strangers

Her hand lifted from her pocket, pulling out the square of paper that she’d been sent to deliver, even more despair entering her voice as she stared at the note. After a moment, her gaze turned out to the audience, and she clasped the paper to her chest as her tone became rough with the emotion of the crescendo.

I love him, but every day I’m learning
All my life I’ve only been pretending
Without me, his world will go on turning
A world that’s full of happiness
That I have never known

There was a beat of silence as she let the last line cry through the darkness, seeming to take all the oxygen out of the room with her shaky breath as she softened her voice for the last tags. A sad smile settled across her features as she let her fingers caress the letter, her eyes coming down to focus on the paper. Her last lines were a powerful confession, tender as a whisper as they floated out from the stage.

I love him
I love him
I love him
But only on my own

As the last words died away, the audience came to their feet and erupted in applause, whistles and cheers, the ruckus echoing around him as he grinned, glancing to the side when he heard both Chris and Joey adding shrill whistles to the fray. Never breaking character, she looked out into the noisy, dark room, her fingers tucking the note back into her pocket before reaching up to remove the hat from her head, holding it over her heart for just a moment. Two beats of a pause as the curtain rose, then she whipped the hat back into place and turned to quickly cross the stage, approaching the blonde’s father and delivering the note before disappearing into the wings.

It took a few minutes to get the crowd under control, but once the roar had subsided and seats had been taken, the orchestra picked up as if there had been no interruption, returning the action back to Adam and the men at the barricade. There was some conversation, some scuffling and then yelling as the men climbed up on the wall and fired their weapons, the sound of the block-barreled guns echoing sharply around the theater.

The firing stopped, and a little boy crouched below the top of the wall looked behind it, calling out that someone was climbing up. One of the older men leaned across, reaching to pull Jen up and over, and held her until the others could get in position to help her down. She carried on a brief, halting exchange with Adam as the men passed her along the barricade, her hat falling off her head to show the streaks of red liquid trickling from her hairline, and when he grasped her waist to lower her to the floor, her coat came open, revealing the dark, bloody stains on her blouse.

Adam tried to set her down, but her red-tinged fingers grasped his shirt as she collapsed, taking him with her to land in a heap on the stage. As the strings began a delicate tune, he sat up and pulled her into his lap, cradling her to his chest as she pressed her hands to her abdomen and chest and began to sing. She blinked drowsily and tried to focus on his face, her voice tender as it weakened, reflecting what bit of joy could be found at finally being held in his arms, even if it was as she was dying.

Where Maggie had delivered a loud, dramatic death in the first act, Jen knew that her character’s passing should be gentle – no matter that it was the result of violence – and she managed to present it perfectly, her voice blending smoothly with Adam’s during the last lines she would deliver.

And you will keep me safe
And you will keep me close
And rain will make the flowers ...

She raised trembling fingers to his face, smearing 'blood' against his cheek as she struggled to breathe, her words fading to silence as she let the life drain from her body. Going limp, her head fell back against his arm, her hand dropping away from him as he finished out the song alone.

There were sniffles and sobs carrying around the auditorium as Adam leaned down to kiss Jen’s forehead, then clasped her lifeless form in his arms and began to rock back and forth, grieving the friend he’d tried to protect. The scene was filled with anguish, the stage lights glinting off the tears streaming down not only Adam’s face, but the faces of everyone on stage. The little boy had climbed down the barricade, clutching the pant leg of a young man standing to the side, both of them openly sobbing as the leader of the group held Adam back so that others could lift Jen away from him, carrying her over to lay her in the back of a wooden wagon next to the set.

JC swallowed around the hard lump in his throat, then heard a sniffle next to him and glanced over to see Justin accepting a tissue from his mother. His young friend rolled his eyes at himself and wiped his nose, shaking his head with a quiet sigh. Leaning over, he whispered in Justin’s ear. “You all right?”

“Yeah.” With a shrug, he laughed under his breath. “She just …”

“I know.” Nudging him playfully with his elbow, JC sent him a smile. “Tears your heart out, doesn’t she?” At Justin’s nod, he chuckled quietly. “She’s had me in knots since we were kids. It gets easier, I promise.”

Settling back in his seat, JC took a deep breath and returned his attention to what was happening on stage. The cast handled themselves wonderfully, delivering the right amount of emotion in each scene to convey the despair behind each death – the little boy’s demise earning an appropriate reaction from the audience. Even the inspector’s suicide seemed to beg for sympathy, despite the hatred the character had inspired since the beginning.

Finally, a dimly lit set showed the lead character in a rocking chair in front of a darkened curtain, writing something in a book on his lap. Adam and the blonde came rushing in, crossing the stage to him, going back and forth as the older gentleman tried to prepare them for his death. Maggie entered and made her way toward him, white robe flowing around her as she came to a stop beside his chair, smiling at the blonde playing her now adult daughter. Then Jen appeared wearing a similar robe and crossed the same way, sending her own smile in Adam’s direction, her voice a perfect harmony to Maggie’s as the gentleman rose from the chair and took their hands, allowing them to lead him to center stage.

Lights slowly lit behind the curtain, illuminating the full cast as they began to sing the closing number quietly at first, then building power as the leads began to join in. Adam and the blonde came to stand beside Jen, the inspector and the little boy coming in from the side to join Maggie as the orchestra swelled into the final choruses. All the voices came together, holding the last harmonies until the maestro cut to finish, and the audience rose to its feet, cheering as the cast all ran into the wings until time for their final bows.

JC tucked the teddy bear under his arm as he clapped, smiling as the racket swelled for the ladies’, men’s and children’s choruses. Brian let out a whistle as Maggie came out for her bow and she grinned, waving in their general direction before stepping to the side and waiting as Jen came out to join her. The room went wild as she took a bow and waved, some of the people in the balcony stomping their feet to add to the ruckus as the girls clasped hands for another deep bow, then moved to the side for the next pair.

The noise swelled again as the lead actor took his bow and the house lights came up, allowing him to indicate the orchestra, the maestro turning to take a bow. The older man reached out to either side, taking Jen and Adam’s hands as the lead cast all raised joined hands for one last bow. Then the maestro motioned toward them, the orchestra launching into the music for Jen’s solo, sending the crowd into cheers and whistles again.

Her eyes widened as she looked up at the man holding her hand, who just smiled with a nod and pushed her back to center stage, the rest of the cast encouraging her into an encore. Taking a deep breath, she smiled quickly then glanced toward the orchestra, returning the maestro’s nod as he skipped the intro and went directly into the main portion of the song. She began to sing, looking around at all the people in the audience before her, then turning to the cast behind her, grabbing first Maggie’s hand, then Adam’s, silently asking them to join her. By the second verse, the entire cast was singing with her and she motioned toward the audience, encouraging them to join in as well. By the third verse, she was leading the entire building through her encore.

As the final notes rang through the room, Jen looked between Maggie and Adam, then started an acapella round of the final chorus of the show, the entire cast finishing out with them before taking one last bow, waving to the audience as they began to exit the stage.

“Hey, Jace!” Brian’s voice carried to him from the main aisle, where he was dodging the rush of people headed for the exit. “Come on. I’ll take you to her.”

“Great.” He looked around at the rest of the crew. “Are you guys gonna meet us somewhere, or do you want to wait here?”

“We’ll wait.” Joey grinned and stretched. “Just don’t keep her back there all night.”

“Right.” Rolling his eyes, JC stepped around Chris and followed Brian toward a door at the side of the stage. His eyes widened when he saw the chaos in the hallways. “Are you sure it’s okay for me to be back here?”

“Are you kidding?” Brian laughed, turning down a hallway to the right. “She’d kill me if I left you out there. I have strict instructions to deliver you to her dressing room ASAP.”

They made another turn and JC came to a sudden halt when he saw a grinning Adam knocking on a door, teddy bear in hand. “Uh, maybe …”

“Stop.” A hand clapped over his shoulder when he began to turn away. “Stay. It’s not what you think.”

The door opened and he heard Jen laughing. “It’s perfect! She’ll love it!” There was a brief exchange and she went on her toes to hug Adam around the neck, the white fabric of her costume billowing around her. “Hang on a sec.” She moved back into the room, reappearing a minute later with three roses in hand. “Here. I have no idea who sent these, so I guess they can’t be mad if I decide to pass them on.” Adam took the flowers, his shoulders raising in a deep breath as her hands straightened his stage jacket. “You’ve got this. Now, what are you gonna do?”

“Use my words.” The deeper voice carried down the hallway.

“Why?”

“Because she can’t read my mind.” He smiled down at the bear and flowers. “And the bear can’t talk for me.”

“Exactly.”

“Thanks, Jenny.” Adam bent down to kiss her cheek. “You’re the best.”

“Whatever.” She laughed, then pushed him down the hallway. “Lila awaits. Go get her.” As she watched him walk away, a door opened across the hall. Jen smiled when the older man who’d played the lead stepped out, still in half of his costume. “Great job, Jim. You brought the house down.”

“I’m thinking you’ve been the star of this show, young lady.” Jim came toward her, pulling her into a hug. “I hope we get to work with you again. I’d love to have a chance to sing with you.”

“I never thought I’d be a theater person, but I’ve had a blast. I guess we’ll have to wait and see what the next show is. If it fits in my schedule, maybe …”

“Lila?” As the new conversation carried on in front of Jen’s door, JC arched a brow questioningly. “Who’s Lila?”

“The blonde.” Brian chuckled under his breath. “Now that the show’s over, Adam needs an excuse to keep seeing her. Jen thought dating her might be good enough.”

“Of course she did.” A grin lit his features. “So she’s trying to go three for three?”

“More like five for five.” Shaking his head, Brian leaned against the wall. “Your girl’s something else, man. She got Sam and Jake together sometime around Valentine’s Day. A few weeks after that, she found the perfect match for Nick – one of Maggie’s drama group girls.” His eyes landed on Jen’s face and he knew the second she noticed them standing there. “Jace, I’m absolutely positive that Maggie loves me, but sometimes I wonder what I’d have to do to get her to look at me the way Jen looks at you.”

“Try being gone for months at a time. That should do it.”

“It’s not that.” Brian sent him a glance. “Whether you’ve been out of the country or you’ve just come up from the studio and you’re crossing paths in the kitchen, she looks at you as if you hung the moon.”

“Both you and Chris have mentioned it tonight.” JC sighed, running a hand through his hair. “I guess I’m not paying attention, because I’ve never noticed it.”

“Really?”

“Yeah. We’ve been in each other’s lives for so long, we kind of mastered the whole avoidance thing. I think we’re trying to get past that, but maybe she still isn’t letting me see it?”

“Could be.” Brian shrugged. “She’s told me a little bit about how you rescued her when she was six.”

“That’s not quite the whole story.” JC’s fingers played with the teddy bear’s fur. “She rescued me, too. I was adopted about halfway through kindergarten, so my parents had to enroll me in the class late. I was shy, I didn’t talk much and I wasn’t very good at being social. The kids in first grade knew me about as well as they knew her.” A smile tilted his lips. “When I saw her sitting on that swing, looking so lonely, I thought there wasn’t a much sadder picture than that, so I asked if she needed a push. She reeled me in with a smile and I guess the rest is history.”

“Do we have to talk about how pathetic I was as a little kid?” Her voice was light with humor as she came to stand next to him, Jim at her side. “Jim, you know Brian.”

“Great job tonight, Jim.” Reaching up to pat him on the shoulder, Brian began moving down the hallway. “I’d better get to Maggie before she sends out a search party. Later, guys.”

“Josh, this is Jim Meadows. He played Jean Valjean.” She glanced over to Jim. “This is my … uh …” For a second, she looked stumped, her brow furrowing quickly before she recovered with a smile. “JC. This is JC.”

“Ah, your young man.”

“Well, not really.” Her eyes cut to JC, her cheeks turning slightly pink beneath the stage makeup. “I mean … we’re not …”

“Yes, sir.” He smiled down at her, wrapping an arm around her to pull her into his side, where she immediately relaxed. “Whatever I am, I’m definitely hers.”

“That’s what I thought. Smart boy.” Jim bit back a laugh as he reached out for JC’s hand. “We’ve heard a lot about you, son. I hope Sweden is treating you well.”

“Sweden is wonderful, but it’s not home.” Passing her the teddy bear, he shook the older man’s hand. “I really enjoyed the show tonight. Everyone did an awesome job.” A quick glance her direction let him see her cuddling the bear to her chest with a happy smile, and he couldn’t help a grin as he leaned down to kiss the top of her head. “You were fantastic, Boof. I’m so proud of you.”

“Thanks, Josh. He’s adorable.” She leaned in as if to hug him, then remembered the makeup still caking her face and pulled away. A strange look crossed his features and she let out a laugh, gesturing toward her face. “You look really nice and I don’t want to get this junk all over your shirt. I need to go get cleaned up before I can hug you.”

“It was nice to meet you, JC.” Jim sent him a wink as he turned back to his dressing room. “I hope you’ll join us for the cast party next Friday night.”

“Nice to meet you, too. You just might see me there.” Following her down the hall and into her dressing room, he let the door close behind him. “Is that okay?”

“Is what okay?” Her eyes met his in the mirror, where she was already wiping at her face with a towelette, grimacing at the amount of grime left on the cloth. “Ugh, I hate this stuff.”

“My coming to the cast party.” He came over and propped his hip against the vanity, facing her. “You didn’t mention it.”

“I’d love for you to come with me.” She sent him a grin. “I just didn’t know for sure how long you’d be home, and I didn’t want you to feel bad if you couldn’t stay.” Pulling her hair back into a quick ponytail, she reached for a fresh wipe and began working over her forehead and mouth. “It’ll be a double celebration for me, anyway. Finals are next week, and my term is over as of Thursday.” Giving herself a quick once-over to make sure all the makeup was gone, she wrinkled her nose and showed him the stained cloth. “That’s why I don’t wear lipstick much. Stains everything.”

“Okay.” When he saw her reaching into her bag for her lip gloss, a teasing smile formed as he tried to read what flavor it was. “Yeah, I like the lip gloss better, too.”

Her hand froze in mid-swipe, the tube of gloss against her bottom lip, and she let her gaze meet his, a laugh escaping when she saw the expression on his face. “Prefers lip gloss. I think I can remember that.” She finished with the gloss and dropped the tube back into her bag, then stood and turned her back to him. “Can you help me with the zipper?” He hesitated, and she looked over her shoulder with a smile. “Don’t panic. I’m dressed underneath.” Turning around, she reached back to pull her hair out of the way. “Just be careful of my necklace, okay?”

“Uh huh.” The zipper moved easily, revealing the white tank top and khaki capris she’d been wearing since her costume change. As the back of the gown came open, he noticed the silver chain hanging low and lifted it higher around her neck so it wouldn’t tangle in her hair. “Is that far enough?”

“Yeah. Thanks.” She let her hair fall and shrugged out of the sleeves, careful that her slip-on tennis shoes didn’t leave prints on the long fabric as she stepped out of it and moved to hang it on the rack in the corner. “I hope they put on a kids’ program or something so they can reuse this.” With a grin, she came back toward him. “Okay, now I can hug you without making a mess of your clothes.”

“I wouldn’t have cared.” He breathed deeply when she stepped into him, her arms wrapping around his waist as she let her cheek rest against his chest. Hugging her tightly, he leaned down until he could kiss the top of her head again, his lips moving against her hair. “And I really am so proud of you. You were amazing, Jenny.” Beginning to sway back and forth, he let his gaze travel over the small collection of gifts on the table in the corner. “Looks like you already have fans, huh?”

“Just a few.” A soft laugh was muffled by his shirt. “Mom brought the music vase and some flowers on opening night. The Fatones were here last weekend and brought the cute little giraffe – ironically, his name is Short Stuff. Big Joe and Steve were full of themselves for finding him.” Moving closer to him, she leaned herself more snugly into his embrace. “The baby owl is from Sophie and her parents, and Matt, Amber and Chloe brought the Tigger.” She tilted her head back so she could see him. “And now I’ve got my theater bear from you. I’ve almost got a zoo to take home.”

He couldn’t hold back a smile at the happiness in her eyes and raised one hand to the side of her face. “I’ve missed you.”

“I’ve missed you, too.” Her head turned, pressing her cheek into his palm. “More than I thought I would.”

“It’s not been easy, huh? I’m sorry.” His thumb brushed over her skin, his gaze dropping down to her lips. “I haven’t really kissed you since I got home.”

“I noticed.” Shrugging, she gave him a little smile. “It’s okay. You were leaving and that put us in a different place. We haven’t seen each other in months, so I just figured things had probably changed.”

“They haven’t.” Clearing his throat, he closed his eyes and let his forehead rest against hers. “Not for me, anyway. I know you’ve been expanding your circles since I left – trying new things, meeting all kinds of new people – and I’m scared to ask.” Swallowing hard, blue eyes blinked open to meet hers. “Has anything changed for you?”

“Nope.” Her smile grew as she looked at him. “I’m still waiting on you.” Tilting her head, she went on her toes, her arms tightening around his waist as her lips caught his. A little thrill went through her when she heard him sigh, then felt him hug her closer and respond, moving his mouth against hers in a series of kisses even better than the ones she’d been dreaming about since January. His hold changed, the hand on her face moving down until he could lift her up against him, straightening until her feet left the floor and her fingers slid into his hair.

A few kisses more, and he pulled back with a grin. “Yeah, that’s better than I remember it.”

“I know, right?” She laughed, burying her face against his shoulder and hugging him around the neck. “You really don’t have anything to worry about, Josh. Nobody else measures up.”

“Same to you, Boof.” His hand came to the back of her head, holding her to him as he pressed his lips to her hair. “We’re in a weird situation, and I know it’s frustrating. If I wasn’t headed back overseas in two weeks, I’d be taking the next steps right about now, but I still think that would be unfair to you.”

“It’s okay. Really.” Her eyes met his as he lowered her to stand. “I understand more than you know. You’re finally getting into the serious work of making a go of the group. I want to support you, and I will – without being a distraction.”

“And I don’t want to be a distraction for you, either. You’ve got great things happening here, and I won’t be something that could possibly hold you back from becoming something even more amazing.” Leaning down, he kissed her cheek. “Just be patient with me, okay? At least until you graduate. If nothing changes, I think we could really be something worth waiting for.”

“I’m kind of liking this whole 'more than friends' thing we’ve got going on, too.” Smiling up at him, she took his hands in hers. “If waiting is what works, then that’s what we’ll do. And if your Meant to Be hasn’t come looking for you by the time I graduate – and you don’t move fast enough – then I’m coming after you, no matter where you are.” A sheepish expression crossed her face. “I was trying to figure out how to double up on classes somewhere so that I might finish even sooner …”

“Jenny.” His eyes glinted in warning. “Don’t even think about it. You promised, remember?”

“Yeah.” She sighed, leaning back into his chest. “It doesn’t matter, anyway. There are two classes that I absolutely can’t get into any earlier, so I’ll just have to ride it out.”

“Take your time.” He released her hands so he could wrap his arms around her again. “You only get the college experience once, Jen. Please don’t wish it away because of me. Enjoy every minute of it.”

“I am. Between my work in the labs with Brian and the extra-curriculars, I’m having a blast.” Excitement brightened her features when she lifted her head to look at him. “I’ve got a whole new set of final mixes for you to take back with you. Some of my best work so far, I think. I got to play piano for the jazz ensemble this semester – the youngest accompanist they’ve ever had. That was awesome. In the fall term, I’ll try for Women’s Choir. And I think I’ve decided I want to learn drums as an elective instrument.”

“Drums?” An image of her sitting behind a giant drum kit flashed before him and he laughed. “Seriously? Do they make a kit in your size?”

“Shut up.” Reaching up to tap him playfully on the shoulder, she tried to hold back her own laughter. Stepping out of his arms, she moved to the wardrobe rack, taking the blue flannel shirt off a hanger and putting it on. “I’ve got great rhythm. And using the percussion pad with my composition software is almost my favorite part of the process.” Her fingers rolled the sleeves up to just below her elbows, combed her hair out from underneath her collar, then pulled on her necklace until the heart pendant was freed from her tank top. “Plus, it’s probably a great stress reliever.”

“I’m sure it is.” His grin grew at the sight of her in his old shirt, the fabric hanging almost to her knees and swallowing her whole, her necklace settled over her chest. “You look cute.”

“Cute, huh? Great. That’s exactly what I was going for.” With a shake of her head, she laughed, pausing on her way back across the room to go on her toes and pull him down, kissing his cheek. “Most of the animals will fit in my bag, but could you carry the vase?”

“I think I can handle that.”

“Thanks.” Her thumb moved over his skin, rubbing away the shine her lip gloss had left behind. “You’re a little shiny.”

“Good.” Leaning down, he pressed his mouth against hers once more, then pulled away with a sigh. A playful spark flashed in his eyes as he licked his lips, then chuckled under his breath. “Chocolate cake? I think that’s probably my favorite so far.”

She laughed again, her cheeks turning slightly pink as she stepped away and started loading her little zoo into her duffel, the giraffe’s head poking out the top of the front of the bag and the bear waiting to be carried in her arms. “Every time I find a new flavor, I buy it. The ladies at the pharmacy must think I’ve bought stock in the company or something.”

“That’s my girl. Keep me guessing.”

“Whatever you say, Romeo.” A smile lit her eyes as she pulled the strap of her bag over her shoulder and hugged the bear to her chest. “We should clear out. Are the guys waiting?”

“Yep. Make sure to give a little extra attention to the kid. You kinda got to him.” He cradled the vase in his arm and reached to open the door for her. “After you, superstar.”

---------------------------------------

July 27, 1996

“Jen! Mail’s here.” Lisa flipped quickly through the envelopes, tossing out the obvious junk mail before settling on what appeared to be a statement from a local bank. Her brow furrowing, she glanced toward the office door, still closed as her daughter continued to work on whatever it was she was working on. With a shrug, she slid her finger under the flap and pulled out the papers, not paying a lot of attention until her focus landed on the numbers at the bottom of the last page. “Jenny!”

The office door came open, Jen stepping out with a sheepish shrug. “Sorry. I couldn’t hear you.” Walking across the room, she suddenly became aware of the look on her mother’s face. “What’s wrong?”

“Did you transfer your 'whatever' fund down here?”

“No. I can’t. Both our names are on it, so we both have to be present to sign and finalize the paperwork.” She opened the refrigerator and pulled out a bottle of water. “We should probably do that while you’re here, since you’re spending more time with me. Is that okay? Or do you think I should leave it in Bowie?”

“You really haven’t touched it?”

“Mom, I swear. Between my paycheck, the money for lessons from the kids at the Center, Maggie’s rent and what Lou was sending me for letting the guys use the studio, I haven’t needed to use it. Once I finished getting stuff for the house, I decided to leave it alone unless it was absolutely necessary. And even then, if I did need funds, I’d still need you to handle the transfers and stuff.” Her brow bunched questioningly. “I opened a local account so I could deposit my paychecks and the rent checks. Why?”

“Jenny, what is this?” Lisa passed the pages to her and Jen read over it quickly. “Is this a mistake?”

“Oh my God. This is …” Jen flipped to the front of the statement, taking a quick glance at the account number and assigned name. “Mom, this is my portfolio account.”

“Your what?”

“My portfolio account.” Shaking her head, Jen looked over the numbers again. “When Professor Summers advised me to sign the contract with Mac, he suggested I open a separate account for any royalties generated by my portfolio so I wouldn’t have to worry about him having access to my daily account. It sounded like a great idea, so I did.” Tapping her fingers on the counter, she blinked in confusion. “I literally used a hundred bucks to open it, gave him the depositing information and left it alone. I knew the song with Mariah and Boyz II Men was a hit, but …”

“Jenny, sweetheart, there are six digits on that page. And the first one is definitely not a one.”

“I can see that, Mom. I just don’t know …”

“Haven’t you been getting statements before now?”

“Well, yes, but I really wasn’t expecting for there to be enough activity to worry about.” Jen let her eyes meet Lisa’s. “I swear, I was collecting the envelopes and wasn’t going to do anything with them until tax time. I didn’t even open them, just put them all in the filing cabinet in my office. I didn’t think there would be enough to have to report, but I guess …”

“I’m guessing you were wrong.”

“Yeah.”

“It looks like there were only a few deposits made. All this year.” Lisa was quiet for a moment, staring into space as she tried to gather her thoughts. “Could all this really be from that one song?”

“Well, I think so.” Jen shook her head again. “I was shocked to hear that I actually had a song recorded, let alone released as a single by two of the biggest artists on the planet. It topped the charts in December last year and stayed there until sometime in March. Sixteen weeks at number one. And I’m pretty sure that’s just single sales and radio play. That doesn’t include album sales. I think the album was number one for three or four weeks.” Her eyes widened. “And international play is a totally different thing, too.”

“How could you not know that it was being recorded?” Lisa blinked at her. “Don’t they have to sign agreements and contracts for the rights to record your work?”

“That’s what Mac is doing. He handles all the legal stuff for me, collects the royalties, and represents my portfolio. If it wasn’t for him, my songs wouldn’t be getting out there at all.” Brown eyes closed as she sighed. “When I signed my contract with him, I specifically told him that I had no expectations and wanted to concentrate on my classes and building my portfolio. He agreed to do all the heavy lifting and I was happy with that.”

“Jen, you still need to be on top of what’s happening. Don’t you want to know when a popular artist is interested in your work? Don’t you want to be able to celebrate those successes?”

“I’m beginning to figure that out.” Jen walked over and picked up the phone, ready to dial until she realized it was Saturday and laid it back down. “Okay, so first thing on Monday, I’m going to call and see if we can’t get together with him next week. I’d like to see what’s going on, and I think you probably need to meet him.”

A middle-aged black woman glanced up as Jen and Lisa pushed through the door of the office, each trying to keep a basket from getting caught by the door handle. “Can I help you ladies?”

“Hi.” Jen smiled, setting the basket in a chair and tucking her hair behind her ear. “I’m Jen Lawson, and this is my mother, Lisa. We have a meeting …”

“My goodness!” The woman rose from her seat, coming around her desk toward them. “Jenny Lawson! He’s told me so much about you!” Without warning, she threw her arms around the younger girl, squeezing her in a tight hug. “It’s about time you came in to see us.” Leaning back, she gave Jen a quick once over. “You’re a tiny thing, aren’t you? Much younger than I imagined.”

“I am?” Startled, Jen glanced quickly at her mother. “I … uh …”

“Oh, I’m so sorry.” With a laugh, the woman stepped away. “I’m Tessa, Mac’s assistant.” She gestured around the large room. “His only staff, really. He’s very particular about who he represents, so we don’t see a lot of foot traffic through here.”

“Okay.” Laughing quietly, Jen shook her head. “It’s nice to meet you, Tessa. I already feel welcome.”

“As you should. I haven’t seen him this excited about a client in a very long time.” Tessa reached out, placing a hand on Lisa’s arm. “Your girl has been working magic and doesn’t even know it.”

“Well, I hope your version of magic includes sweet stuff, because she’s been baking up a storm.” Lisa held out the basket. “As her official taste-tester, I suggest either the peanut butter brownies or the chocolate chunk cookies. They’re killer.”

“Honey, you should’ve seen my men tear through the holiday basket you sent.” With a bubbling laugh, Tessa took the basket, peering intently through the gift wrapper. “My husband and sons were fighting over the chocolate fudge and peppermint bark before we even had it unwrapped. And that hot chocolate mix? Lord, girl, that was heaven in a cup. I hid the tin away so nobody else could find it.” Setting the goodies down on the desk, she glanced back over to Jen. “Thank you so much. Mac is good to share his gifts when he can, but this was the first year that anyone actually sent a staff gift.”

“The business doesn’t get done if you don’t have the right support.” Jen nodded. “A good assistant deserves perks, too.”

“Oh, there’ve always been perks, but lately they’ve been in abundance.” Tessa returned to her seat behind the desk. “We’ve been blessed these last few months. In fact, if it wasn’t for you, I wouldn’t have made it to visit my Daddy before he passed away.”

“I’m so sorry.”

“Don’t be. I’d guess that he’s happier now than he ever was on this earth.” Clearing her throat, she reached toward the phone on the desk. “He’ll be after me if I don’t let him know you’re here. He was over the moon when he saw you were on his schedule today.” Her finger paused over the button. “Mac has a heart of gold, but this business can really wear a body and spirit down. You’ve put new life in him, Jen. He looks better than he has in years.” Not waiting for a response, she lifted the receiver to her ear and pressed the intercom button, grinning when he picked up. “Mac, honey, you didn’t mention that this girl is as cute as a pixie. And she bakes, to boot.” Jen snorted back a laugh as Tessa winked at her. “Yes, sir, I think she brought some for you, too.” There was a pause. “Yep. You’ve got it.” Hanging up the phone, she leaned back in her chair. “He’ll be right out.”

Lisa had just picked up the second basket when the door behind the desk opened and Mac came breezing through, all smiles. “Jenny! So glad you came in.”

“Hi, Mac.” Jen grinned as he approached, stepping into his hug. “It’s good to see you.” She let out a laugh. “We come bearing treats.”

“So I’ve heard.” He released her, turning toward Lisa with a welcoming smile. “And you must be Lisa. It’s a pleasure.” Stepping back, he held the door open. “Please come in, ladies.” As they passed by, he sent a glance toward Tessa. “I’m expecting to hear from John Stevens today. If he calls before we’re done, just take a message. I’ll get back to him.”

“Yes, sir.”

“Thank you, Tessa.” Closing the door behind him, he turned to find that the basket had been placed on his desk, both Jen and Lisa wandering to look at the framed pictures on the walls. “So, Jenny, Lisa … what brings you in today?”

“Is this Eric Clapton?” Jen’s voice was filled with awe as she gestured to one of the photos.

“It is. I’ve had the pleasure of meeting a few of the heavy-hitters over the years.” With a smile, he took the seat behind his desk. “Whenever a client is nominated for an award, there’s a possibility I get to tag along as a seat-filler. That was taken at the Grammy Awards in ’93.”

“Tears in Heaven is one of my favorites. I think it was the first major acoustic piece I taught myself after I completed the Advanced Theory book.”

“Well, my dear, I’d wager that one of these days, there’s going to be young people across the country learning your music in the same fashion.” He leaned forward, his arms crossing on the desktop. “As happy as I am to see you, I must say I was surprised that you wanted a meeting. Is everything going well? Do you have questions?”

“Yes and yes.” Jen laughed quietly, taking a seat and looking over as Lisa did the same. “I actually opened a bank statement over the weekend, and you can imagine my shock at how different it looks lately. It’s come to my attention that even though I generally keep my hopes low, being completely unaware of what’s happening with my business may not be the best track for me to take here.”

“I see. It’s amazing what one hit record can do, isn’t it?” His fingers ran through his hair. “That’s all it takes to get the ball rolling.”

“One Sweet Day really did that well?”

“Between single sales, album sales and radio play, yes. It’s a phenomenal song, Jen.”

“How is that possible?” Lisa shifted in her seat. “I know I’m not familiar with the entertainment industry at all, but wouldn’t the artist receive the bulk of the royalties?”

“Believe it or not, unless the artist writes, arranges and publishes the song, he’s the low man on the totem pole.” Mac leaned back, his arms raising to cross over his chest. “Not only did they attain the rights to record the lyrics, they also kept much of the original arrangement. Since they didn’t provide an entirely new backing track, she also retains a portion of that credit as well.” The corner of his mouth kicked up. “Add that to the fact that we’re operating as our own publisher, and the percentage of royalties payable to Jen is well above what your average songwriter would receive.”

“I’m my own publisher?” Jen’s brow furrowed. “That was the paperwork I had to sign for the whole JennyTunes thing, right?” She glanced over to Lisa. “That’s the business name on the portfolio account, but I never really understood what that meant.”

“One of the reasons I left Universal with Alex was because I felt we were stripping the clients we were representing of a large portion of the earnings they were due.” His chest lifted with a sigh. “Publishing companies have the potential to make a killing on a portfolio like yours. Yes, you would probably still have seen a rather impressive payout for your work, but a large portion of that income would’ve been withheld by the company. Not only would they receive the publisher’s portion of the royalties, they would also likely be entitled to a percentage of your portion as well, depending on your agreement.”

“And Jen’s agreement with you is … what, exactly?” Lisa tilted her head, studying him across the desk. “How is it any different than what she would’ve had if she’d signed with a large publishing firm?”

“Rather than having all the strings attached, our agreement is for a single percentage of royalties. I represent Jenny as songwriter, arranger, composer and publisher. Word is traveling fast, and it’s not unusual for me to field multiple requests to view her portfolio in a day. Each artist represents potential earnings, so responses are made promptly, and we hope that they result in agreements for recording. After royalties are compiled and paid to my agency, I deduct my twenty five percent and the rest is deposited directly into the business account she set up.” Mac let his eyes meet Lisa’s. “Upon her graduation, she is free to decide if she wishes to keep her agreement with me, or if she would prefer to move to a larger agency. My hope is that she’ll extend our contract, but that’s her choice.” His focus moved to Jen. “I don’t think we discussed the government’s portion of the royalties. Taxes are not withheld from your deposits and things are about to begin booming, so I strongly suggest acquiring an accountant. I have all the financial paperwork that you’ll need to handle the filing process. You can either have the taxes withdrawn from each deposit or submit a single tax payment when you file at the end of the year.”

“I guess it’s a good thing I know a fabulous accountant.” Jen smiled sweetly toward her mother. “What do you say, Mom? Can I bribe you out of retirement to crunch my numbers and maybe play with some investing?”

“I’d consider it.” Lisa’s brow arched playfully. “What’s the bribe?”

“Chocolate chunk cookies for life?” A laugh escaped. “Or how about a new car? Heck, I could buy us both a new car.”

“Don’t get too excited, Jenny …”

“By all means, let her get excited.” Mac leaned forward over the desk. “She has reason to. One Sweet Day was just the beginning.”

“There’s more? What else is going on?”

“Where would you like to start?” He gestured to a pair of large filing cabinets across the room. “That’s all you. The one on the left is for requests to view material. The one on the right is signed contracts for either lyrics, or both the lyrics and arrangements. Those are the ones most likely to end up on an album, if they haven’t already. You’ve also had a great response to some of the material you’ve submitted for the film projects I’ve sent you. I’ve been grinding it out over payment contracts with different studios for the past few months, making sure you’re getting the best deal I can finalize.”

“Really?” Jen blinked in surprise. “Which ones?”

“Disney acquired the rights for Go the Distance for an animated feature currently in development, used both in the body of the film and as a pop single during the credits. A representative from Fox tells me they’ve narrowed their selections down and will likely run with At the Beginning for one of their animated features.” Rising from his chair, he moved to the cabinet and pulled open the top drawer, flipping through the files until he found the folder he was looking for. “Tom Hanks is producing a movie that will feature and be named after That Thing You Do. It releases later this year. He wanted it pretty badly, and I was able to get a sweet deal signed for it.”

“Tom Hanks?” Lisa’s hand gripped Jen’s wrist. “You wrote a song for Tom Hanks?”

“Well, I didn’t know it at the time, but yeah. I guess so.” Her head shook back and forth slowly. “It’s just a silly little song that wrote itself in thirty minutes. All I had to do was play with the track and it was done. This is crazy.”

“Who Would Imagine A King has been acquired for a Christmas film release this year, with Whitney Houston performing the track.” Biting back a grin, Mac continued. “And your friend Eric up there recorded a version of Change the World for the Phenomenon film soundtrack. It was released as a commercial single on the fifth. The Wynonna Judd version was included on her February release, but won’t likely be a single.”

“You’re kidding!” Brown eyes sparked with excitement. “I loved that guitar melody. Did he keep it?”

“I believe he did. You could always go buy a copy to hear it for yourself.”

“I can, can’t I?” Jen cast a quick glance toward Lisa. “We’re stopping on the way home.” Her focus came back to Mac. “Anything else I should know?”

“There’s a few notables that aren’t movie related.” He returned the file to the cabinet, his fingers flipping over the tops of the folders. “She Drew A Broken Heart was included on the last Patty Loveless album. There’s a possibility that it’ll be released as an eventual single. Don’t Speak was recorded by a group out of California and released as a radio single in April. It’s getting great airplay response so far, but they don’t intend to release a commercial single at this time. Gloria Estefan recorded Reach for her latest release, and I’m not sure if you’ve been watching the Olympic Games, but it was selected as one of the themes for the event. It’s getting quite a bit of prime time airplay and they’ll include it on the album released after the closing ceremonies.”

“Oh, wow.” She sat back, her head spinning. “Is that it?”

“Almost. After the success she had in Japan with To Love You More, Celine Dion is constantly checking over your new material. Call the Man was included on her March release in the U.S., which is selling remarkably well. You’ll see a great payout for that one, even if it never becomes a single. Several contracts have been signed for the recording rights to other songs, we just have to wait and see if they get released. There’s been some interest in your composition work for commercial use, but nothing solid yet. I’m finalizing the agreement for the printing rights for the simple sheet music of One Sweet Day.” Mac opened the other cabinet, his brow furrowing as he looked over one of the files. “And I’ve gotten numerous requests for updated material from a Johnny Wright.”

“Oh, really?” Jen felt a smile forming. “Johnny’s a good friend, so we want to do anything we can for him. If he’s looking for something specific, please let me know.”

“Certainly.” Removing the pen from his pocket, he made a few notes in the file. “For right now, that’s all I have to report. There’s several possibilities floating around, so I’ll let you know if anything else becomes definite.”

“Thank you.” Standing up, she moved across the room and hugged him. “For everything. I never dreamed anything like this would be happening.”

“This is all you, Jenny.” With a quiet laugh, he gave her a squeeze in return. “You’ve built this vehicle, and I’m just trying to help you steer it.” Looking down at her, he grinned. “I’ve gotten some great feedback on your full vocal arrangements as well. It seems more people are wanting to know who the voice is behind the songs. I don’t handle artist representation, but if that’s something you’re interested in, I can make a few calls. Even if you never want to release a vocal recording, your instrumentals could make for a fabulous series of albums.” A slight redness entered his cheeks. “Brian was kind enough to put together a few discs that I keep at home. I hope you don’t mind.”

“Of course I don’t mind. If you hear something you like, it’s yours.” She looked over toward Lisa. “I think we need to celebrate, don’t you?”

“Sounds good to me.” Lisa stood with a smile, stepping around her chair and toward the door. “What did you have in mind?”

“I know a great little pizza place downtown. The breadsticks practically melt in your mouth.” Glancing at the clock on the wall, Jen turned to Mac. “It’s past lunch time. Would you and Tessa be able to join us? My treat.”

“I …” Trailing off in uncertainty, his eyes moved over his young client, then skipped up to her mother, who was nodding encouragingly behind Jen’s back. “That would be wonderful. We’d love to.”

He held the door open for them, and as they passed through, Lisa paused briefly before him, her hand resting on his arm as she leaned in to speak softly. “Thank you for taking care of her. It’s a relief to know that she has good people watching out for her whenever I’m back home.”

“It’s been my pleasure.” Mac smiled, propping the door with his foot so that he could cover her hand with his. “She’s a wonderful person who has a magic I’ve never seen in any of my other clients. I’ll do everything I can to protect both Jenny and her work.” With a wink, he nudged Lisa on through the doorway so that they could both see his assistant talking to Jen, gesturing animatedly with a half-eaten cookie in her fingers. “And I believe Tessa will be more than happy to tear apart anybody who might make it around me.”

January 13, 1997

“She’s not a guest, Sara. She’s family.”

Diane’s voice carried from the door of the warehouse, and JC opened his eyes, careful not to tilt his head too far as he looked around the woman applying his makeup for that day’s filming, trying to see what was going on in the mirror. A grin quickly formed when he saw the reflection and he sat back, sending a glance to the teen sitting in one of the chairs to the side, waiting for his turn with the makeup artist. “Hey, J.”

“Hmm?” Not even looking up, Justin flipped a page and continued to focus on the article he was reading.

“Look who’s here.”

“What?” Brow furrowed, blue eyes came away from the issue of Sports Illustrated in his hands. “Who’s here?”

“Seriously, man.” JC laughed, gesturing behind them with his thumb. “Check it out.”

“What?” Still confused, Justin turned his attention in the direction JC was pointing, a bright smile breaking across his features as he dropped the magazine and jumped up from his seat, taking off at a sprint across the large room. “Shorty! You made it!”

“Barely.” Her eyes were wide as he descended upon her and she braced herself for his exuberant hug. “Blondie back there really didn’t want to let me in the door.”

“Oh, that’s just Sara. She’s one of Johnny’s crew.”

“She looks familiar.” There was a tug on her bag, and she glanced down to see Diane’s fingers wrapped around the strap. With a grateful smile, Jen let her take it, then looked over in the blonde’s direction. “Isn’t she the girl from your last video?”

“Yeah. She was already there and being paid, so Johnny had her pulling double duty.” Picking her up, he started walking toward the wardrobe area. “You’ve got perfect timing, Jen. Jace is still in makeup, so the rest of us get you for a little while.”

“I can walk, you know.” She laughed, hugging him around the neck. “It’s so good to see you, J.”

“You, too. I was really bummed we weren’t able to meet up before we had to be here for filming.” His arms squeezed her tightly and he pressed a kiss into her hair. “We head back to Sweden as soon as we finish the video, and it wouldn’t have been right to not see you again this trip, sis.”

“Yeah, I know. I’m sorry, kiddo.” Turning her head, she caught JC’s wink in the mirror as they passed, returning it with a smile and a wave. “I’ve been kind of busy.”

“I’ll bet you have.” He stepped around the corner, where the others were being outfitted in black pants and various types of white shirt. “Hey guys … look who’s here!”

“Gracie!” Chris glanced up first, grinning as he pushed between the clothes on the rack and moved toward them. “How does it feel to be both a Golden Globe and a Grammy nominee?”

“Weird.” She heard footsteps approaching and released her hold on Justin’s neck, trying to twist around so she could see them. “People suddenly want to know who I am.”

“That’s what happens when you come out of nowhere and take the world by storm.” With a laugh, he reached up to thump Justin on the shoulder. “Dude, put her down. The rest of us need hugs, too.”

A playfully defiant expression came across the teen’s face and Jen groaned over his shoulder. “Come on, J. I had to be on the road by four to make sure I got here before filming started.” Leaning back, she gave him a pleading look and kicked her feet. “It’s already been a long day. No funny stuff. Not before I’ve had a nap. Please?”

“You had to break out the sad eyes, didn’t you? Damn.” Rolling his eyes to mask his concern at the weariness in her tone, he sighed and leaned down until she was standing. “Okay, okay. There you go.”

“Thanks, little bro.” She smiled up at him, squeezing him around the waist before turning to the others. “I was kind of afraid I wasn’t going to make it, but Mac agreed with me that all those interview requests could wait until either closer to the ceremony, or afterward.” Stepping forward, she leaned into Chris’ hug. “It builds mystery or whatever. And nobody wants to make a big deal out of the losers, anyway.”

“Hey, now.” Chris looked down at her, brow furrowed. “Why do you think you’re going to lose?”

“Because I’ve learned to keep my hopes low.” Her shoulders shook with laughter. “If I start out with no expectations, then I can’t really be disappointed, can I?”

“After the year you just had, I’d say you’re already winning, Hot Stuff.” Joey spun her around until she slammed into his chest, then wrapped his arms around her. “This would just be a bonus, right?”

“Exactly, Joe Bear.” Returning his hug, she grinned. “Icing on the cupcake. Besides, I’m not too amped for the Globes, anyway. Mac says our focus should be more on the Grammys, so I’m not even going to the other ceremony.”

“Smart thinking. Change the World is unique and has a really cool groove. Wynonna’s version is fantastic, but Clapton was the perfect way to deliver it for wide release.” Lance joined them, scratching his neck. “I think you’ve got it in the bag.”

“Tell that to Diane Warren and Babyface.” She sighed and shook her head, then moved over for her last hug. “I wish I had the confidence you guys have. Considering who I’m up against, I’ll just be happy to be there.” Letting out another laugh, she glanced around at them all. “I’ve never even been to New York and my first visit is for the Grammy Awards. How crazy is that?”

“Just make sure to have a great acceptance speech ready, Boof. I’m pretty sure you’re gonna need it.” JC approached the group, shrugging into a long-sleeved white button-down shirt. “They’re ready for you, J. Stefan’s finishing up blocking a few things, then he’ll be getting us going.” As Justin walked away, he turned toward Jen with a smile, arms lifted slightly at his sides. “My turn?”

“I suppose … if I have to.” With a half-hearted shrug, she went to him, fighting back a smile when she felt him pulling her tightly into his chest. Closing her eyes, she rested her cheek against the soft fabric of his shirt and looped her arms around his waist. For a moment, she relaxed into him, then took a deep breath and let her eyes blink open, meeting the icy glare Sara was sending her from across the room. Her brow furrowed in confusion, then she let it go and tilted her head back to grin up at him. “You look good in black and white.”

“Thanks. This is one of the dancing and photo shoot outfits. They had us in all black yesterday.” He leaned down and kissed the top of her head. “How long can you stay?”

“If I can get a hotel room, I was hoping to be here until Wednesday. There’s a payphone in the parking lot, so I’ll check for a phone book and call around from my cell to see what I can find.”

“Don’t worry about it. They’ve got us in rooms at the hotel down the block and you can just crash with one of us.”

“Yeah.” Lance spoke up, kneeling to make sure his shoelaces were tied tightly. “I can move in with Mom and you can take my spot with Jace.”

“Are you sure?” Jen looked toward Lance with an appreciative smile. “I don’t want to put anybody out.”

“Oh, absolutely. She’s got a suite at the end of the hall, so there’s lots more room with her.” Laughing quietly, he stood and arched an eyebrow at her. “Did you really just say you got a cell phone?”

“Mom decided to throw her weight around.” With a sarcastic eye roll, she looked to the ceiling. “When she saw how busy I was with last fall’s schedule, she took over as my go-between with Mac and thinks she needs to be able to contact me at all times, just in case something monumental happens. Or, you know, if I end up broken down in the middle of nowhere, then I can call in the cavalry.” Her fingers slipped into her pocket and pulled out the compact, folding phone, passing it over for him to check out. “It’s handy, even if it does look like something straight out of Clueless.”

“Cool. I can see how it’d be awesome to get updates with that.” Joey leaned over, watching as Lance flipped it open and played with the antennae. “Is that how you found out about your nomination?”

“Actually, we were standing in the kitchen when Mac called.” Her eyes came up to meet JC’s, sparking with humor. “If you think my kitchen dancing is something to see, you should’ve seen us right then. We didn’t even hang up the phone, just went crazy and let him hear it all.” Giggling quietly, she tightened her arms around his waist and turned to face Lance. “But I did get some good news during my drive here. Tim McGraw signed a recording agreement for one of my tracks.”

“No way.” Green eyes skipped up to her, flashing with excitement. “Seriously?”

“He’s working on an album right now, so we’ll have to wait and see if it makes it onto the final cut, but he’s definitely interested.” With a smile, she watched as her phone was passed to Joey. “Amazingly, I’ve got people now, so I’m hoping to wrangle up a promise for an autographed copy of the project.”

“Girlie, you’re the best.”

“I’m trying, anyway.” She laughed when he began bouncing on his toes. “Your mom took my bag when I came in. If you can find her, there’s something in the side pocket to hold you over until we see if I can deliver on Tim. I hope Martina ranks as high as he does.”

“Oh my God. Martina?” Not caring that she was still hugged against JC, Lance leaned over and kissed her cheek, then took off in search of her bag, nearly skipping like a little kid.

The group laughed as they watched him pull out the CD case, gesturing animatedly to Diane as he pointed out the colorful cover art, and Chris turned to her with a grin. “We never get to see Lance act his age. Good job, Gracie.”

“Well, I’m glad I could make his day. She was nice enough to offer me an advance copy of the country single mix of Valentine. I don’t think they’ve even decided if they’re going to release it to that format yet.” Taking her phone from Chris, she tucked it back into her pocket and smiled as she returned Lance’s wave of thanks, her gaze clashing once again with the blonde girl’s angry stare. “I wish everyone was that easy to please.”

JC leaned down until he could whisper in her ear. “You made my day just by walking in the door.” Kissing her forehead, he straightened up and released her as the director began yelling loudly, calling everyone into their spots. “Time to go to work.”

“Have fun.” She gestured around the warehouse. “Where can I hang out that’s out of the way?” A deep yawn escaped. “Or maybe take a nap?”

“Tired, huh?” His eyes narrowed when he saw the exhaustion in her expression. “They haven’t started getting the non-dancing shots ready yet, so I don’t think we’re using the couches until tomorrow. There’s some pillows floating around with the furniture, and you might even be able to see the routine from there.” He pointed out a crowded corner. “Hospitality is set up over there, so grab a drink or something to eat and get comfy. I’ll come find you when we get a break, okay?”

“Okay.”

His hands came to her face, tilting her chin up until he could kiss her lips quickly. “I’m so glad you made it, Boof.” With a wink and a grin, he spun around and jogged over to where the others were waiting, taking his place and listening to the director’s instruction.

The track began echoing around the warehouse, and she stood there watching them go through the dance routine for the opening and first verse of the song a few times – never with the same combination of guys, flashing strobe lights creating a camera shot effect – then made her way to collect her bag and a hug from Diane. They chatted for a few minutes before Jen left her with a few crew members and walked over to the couches JC had pointed out earlier, sending a friendly smile to the staging guys working to assemble a bed further on down the warehouse. With a quick glance toward the direction of filming, she was satisfied that she’d still be able to see what was going on and made herself comfortable on the soft furniture.

A shadow fell over her as she was reaching into her bag for her journal, and she looked up to find Sara standing over her. “Hi.” Jen abandoned the book with a smile, hoping to soften the girl with a nicer introduction. “I’m Jen.”

“I know.” Stone-faced, Sara dropped down on the cushions next to her, making no secret of how she was sizing Jen up. “Sara.”

“Nice to meet you, Sara.” Hiding her discomfort, Jen tried to start a conversation. “Have you worked with the guys long?”

“Johnny brought me on back in August, when they were recording the first single.” The blonde blinked at her, as if trying to decide if she were worth the effort. “I manage their calendar, arrange their transportation and lodging … you know, make sure things run smoothly.”

“An important job. I’m sure they appreciate all you do.”

“They do.” Blue eyes looked her over once again. “More than you probably think.”

“O-okay.” Jen’s brow wrinkled a bit in confusion, her gaze skipping over to where the staging crew had gathered behind the couch. “Is there something I can do for you?”

“At first, I thought you might be a little sister, because you look really young, but you don’t resemble any of them at all.” Sara tossed her hair over her shoulder. “So now I’m just wondering which one you’re with.” One eyebrow arched questioningly. “Or are you equal opportunity?”

“I … I …” For a second, Jen thought she might have misunderstood her, but then she heard a choked sound from the crew nearby. “Excuse me?”

“Are you a bed warmer for one guy in particular, or do they pass you around?” Sara’s expression didn’t begin to hide that she thought Jen might be slow. “From their reactions when you got here, I figured they probably shared you, but then I thought you might have at least a little bit of sense to stick to the ones that are of age.”

“I’m sorry. What?”

“You don’t really have the classy look of somebody they’d pay for. In fact, you don’t look like something anyone would pay for. Are you working off a debt to Lou or something?” That icy glare moved over Jen once again, making her skin crawl with a dirty feeling. “Johnny won’t go for that, you know. He tries his best to run a clean ship.” There was a silence between them as Jen simply stared at her, her tired mind trying to decide how to react, and a smirk settled on Sara’s features. “Do you want me to call you a cab, sweetie? I highly doubt your services are going to be needed during this shoot. Even if it’s just for the hotel rooms, they expect someone who’s a little easier on the eyes.”

Across the room, one of the staging crew stopped beside Diane, leaning down so that he could lower his voice. “You might want to rescue your girl.”

“What?” Diane looked at him, then glanced in the direction he was nodding, her eyes widening when she saw Jen and Sara sharing a sofa closer to the filming area. “What’s going on?”

“Blondie over there just asked her if she was the group prostitute, then offered to call her a cab because she didn’t think she was classy enough to be paid.”

“Oh, God.” Jumping to her feet, Diane fairly ran toward the girls, her pace only slowing to keep from drawing the attention of the group dancing in front of the camera. Once she was close enough, she called out. “Jen?”

“Yeah?” The response was uncharacteristically clipped, and Diane couldn’t tell if she was about to burst into tears or start ripping out Sara’s hair.

“Jenny, honey, why don’t you come with me to get a snack?” Sending a sharp look toward Sara, Diane reached out to touch Jen’s arm. “We haven’t gotten to talk in weeks, and I’d like to catch up. Lance was showing me the new single earlier …” As Jen stood, Diane leaned in closer and whispered. “Do not leave your bag here. Bring it with you.”

“That sounds great, Diane. I’d like that.” Bending down, she picked up her bag, then turned back toward Sara. “Nice talk, Sara. Let’s not do it again.”

“You run along, sweetie.” Sara slid over to the spot Jen had just vacated and settled further into the cushions, a satisfied smile crossing her face as her eyes shot icy daggers at the small brunette. Her shoulders shrugged dismissively, her attention turning to where the guys were dancing. “I’ll keep an eye on him … them and you just make yourself scarce. You’re not needed here.”

“Start walking, Jen. Don’t look back.” Diane’s hand tightened around Jen’s arm, steering her away from the couch and toward the opposite side of the warehouse. “I’m so sorry. I wasn’t paying attention and she got away from me.”

“What … what was that?” Wide brown eyes looked to the older woman, weary confusion evident in her gaze. “Does she do that to everybody? Or is it just me?”

“Oh, she’s a perfect angel when Johnny’s around.” With a sigh, Diane led her to a chair and let her drop into it. “The rest of us … well, let’s just say that Lynn isn’t here because she refuses to be anywhere near her unless we’re traveling. And she had poor Janine in tears when she came over to see us last fall. At least, until Joey made it clear that his sister wasn’t to be messed with.”

“So she really just told me to stay away from Josh?”

“Afraid so, honey. She’s been after him since she joined the crew.”

“But … does he …”

“Even if he could see past you to anyone else, he’d never give her the time of day.” Sitting down next to her, Diane’s hand covered Jen’s. “I promise, Jenny. He’s only civil to her because he has to be. None of them have any use for her other than what she’s hired to do. Even then, they barely tolerate her.”

“Then why is she still here? I can’t imagine Johnny would …”

“Johnny gave her the job, and those boys aren’t about to rock the boat.” She shrugged, shaking her head. “They’ll do anything to keep this thing going, even if it means putting up with the daughter of Satan on a daily basis.” Forcing a smile, Diane gestured toward where the food was set up. “I was actually serious about the snack and chat, but I can tell you’re worn out.”

“I’m running on fumes. Between the pieces I’m trying to finish, my lessons and volunteering at the Center, prepping for the new semester and now the Grammy stuff, I’ve been pulling long hours since Christmas. I probably shouldn’t have come down, but I just …” Her eyes skipped over to where JC was running through the routine again. “I needed to be here. This morning was an exceptionally early start on not nearly enough sleep.” Casting a longing glance toward the couches she’d just fled, Jen cleared her throat. “If I’d had a little more time before the harpy invaded, I would’ve been pretty much unconscious.”

“Give me a few minutes, and I’ll try to work something out.” Another member of the staging crew paused on his way around their table and leaned into their conversation. “Do you want to be able to see the filming?”

“That would be awesome.” She sent him a grateful smile. “Are you sure you don’t mind?”

“They brought in too much furniture for this shoot, so we’re having to move some of it anyway.” He chuckled under his breath. “We’ve not had the best of experiences with her, either, so it’ll be my pleasure to ruffle Blondie’s feathers a bit.” Pointing in the direction of where they’d been setting up the bed, he nodded. “They’re not using that area until later this evening, so I’m going to move one of the larger couches over there. By the time you grab something to eat, we’ll have you ready to go.” Looking to Diane, his brow arched. “You’ll probably want to stick with her. It might keep the Ice Queen from trying anything else.”

“Thank you so much.” Diane stood and motioned for Jen to do the same. “It’s just a little after nine, so they still have breakfast set out. Let’s go see if there are any muffins left and we’ll get you situated, okay?”

“Sounds fabulous.”

True to his word, by the time she’d finished a muffin, drained a cup of orange juice and picked up a bottle of water, the staging crew had completely rearranged the area where she’d been before and one of the crew members was tossing a few pillows on the promised couch that was now placed at the foot of the bed. As the ladies approached, he sent them a wink and walked away, leaving them to get comfortable.

Dropping her bag to the floor and slipping off her shoes, Jen grabbed a pillow and curled up against the armrest, sighing in relief as she settled in. “This is heaven.”

With a laugh, Diane sat down on the other end and reached out to pat the girl’s leg. “Get some rest, honey. I’ll make sure she doesn’t get to you again.”

“Thanks.” Blinking sleepily, she pressed her cheek into the pillow, focusing on JC dancing in front of the cameras. A small smile lifted her lips and she felt her breathing deepen, darkness coming over her as she fell asleep.

About an hour later, there was a break to reset for a different type of shot and the guys all headed in various directions. JC went directly toward the couch, noticing that it had been moved from earlier, a grin brightening his expression as he saw how relaxed Jen was. “Hey, Diane.”

“Hey, Jace. It’s looking good.” Standing up, she stretched her arms over her head. “This isn’t lunch, is it?”

“No, they’re just resetting for the next shots. We’ve got about twenty minutes to rest and lunch will be in a few hours.”

“All right. Are you okay to stay with her for a little while? I need to visit the little girls’ room.”

“Yeah, I’ll be here.” He glanced down at Jen, then back up to Diane. “Why? Is she okay?”

“I lost track of Sara earlier and … I’m sorry.” The older woman shook her head in frustration. “She got to her. By the time I was able to run interference, it was too late.”

“Damn it.” The smile dropped from his face. Crouching next to the couch, he let his fingers run through Jen’s hair. “How bad was it?”

“I couldn’t tell. The poor girl was so exhausted, I don’t think she really knew how to react.” Diane looked around, making sure Sara wasn’t close. “One of the staging crew had to come get me. Apparently, the witch implied that Jen was the group prostitute, and a sad excuse for one, at that.”

“That piece of …” He growled under his breath. “I’ll take care of it.”

“Please do. I’ll be back soon.”

As she walked away, he stood up, then leaned down close to Jen’s ear. “Jenny?”

“Hmmm?” With a deep breath, she stirred slightly.

“Sit up for a second, Boof. I’m gonna hang with you for a little bit.”

Her eyes never opened as she sluggishly tried to sit up, and he let out a laugh, reaching around her and picking her up so that he could settle on the couch with her in his lap. She automatically snuggled into his chest, one arm looping around his neck as her breathing steadied. He tilted his chin down, pressing a kiss to the side of her head and beginning to rock slightly from side to side. When Sara entered the edge of his vision, approaching them quickly, he tightened his arms around Jen, pulling her even closer to him.

“Hey, Jace, do you need …”

“No.” He cut her off, not even sparing her a glance.

“But, I just …”

“Back off, Sara.” His tone was hard, slicing through the air. “Now.”

“Okay.” She let out an exasperated huff. “What’s got you so pissy?”

“You really have to ask?” Stormy blue eyes came up to her, and his anger was evident. “We all know you’re a bitch on the highest level, but Jen is off limits. Leave her alone.”

“My God.” A trilling laugh bounced around the warehouse, and the rumble of voices from the crew went silent as all attention was drawn to them. “She’s gonna be gone in a few days, Jace. She’s not even a blip. It’s not like she matters.”

“She matters far more than you ever will.” He looked down when Jen stiffened against him and let his fingers comb into her hair to comfort her. “Jenny has been a part of this family since the beginning, and you’ll treat her as if she’s one of us, or you won’t be around her at all. Yes, she’s only here for a few days … this time. She will be around in the future, and whenever she’s with me, she’ll feel welcome, or we’ll remove you from the equation completely. Do you understand me?”

“Whatever.” Sara shrugged indifferently, shaking her head as she began to mumble. “Little tramp isn’t worth …”

“Excuse me?” If possible, his voice became even more sharp, carrying clearly around the entire building, and Sara’s eyes widened. “Do you want to finish that a little louder, where we can all hear you?” There was a shifting sound, Chris emerging from the crowd around the hospitality area and coming their direction with a few bottles of water, his brow furrowing when he saw the deadly fury blazing a deep red across JC’s face. “If you want to have any chance in hell of keeping this job, then you’ll listen to me very closely. You will never refer to her as a tramp or imply that she’s a prostitute ever again. She’s mine, and you will show her respect. Pull back the bitchiness or consider yourself gone.” The fire snapping in his gaze would’ve burned her alive if he’d had the power. “Is that clear, Sara? Or do I need to dumb it down for you?”

“Johnny wouldn’t …” For the first time, there was a hesitation in the blonde’s expression. “You can’t …”

“Try us.” Chris came upon them and dropped the bottles on the cushions before facing her and crossing his arms. “Johnny probably wouldn’t have given us a chance in the first place if it wasn’t for Gracie. He holds her in fairly high regard, so I’d bet that he wouldn’t take too kindly to one of his staff using terms like tramp and prostitute to describe her.  The odds of him giving up a good relationship with a musical goldmine just to keep on a bitchy little assistant probably don’t fall in your favor.” Tilting his head, he grinned when Sara swallowed nervously. “Jenny tries to keep things lowkey, so most people don’t realize who she is. Not only did she write the current number one song on the Billboard chart, she wrote the longest-running Billboard number one of all time and she’s the youngest Song of the Year nominee in Grammy history. Not to mention that she spoils Johnny with the best peanut butter bars on the planet.” Glancing to the side, he took in JC’s unusually hostile expression. “There’s really no reason for you to be here. It’s not like you’re doing anything other than pissing people off. If I were you, I’d take a long walk and keep my head down for a little while.”

It was so quiet as Sara turned and walked away that everyone could hear her sneakers scraping against the warehouse floor, then the squeaking of the door hinges as she pushed her way outside. The slamming of the door behind her was a trigger, setting off the activity of the video shoot as if there hadn’t been an interruption. Crew members turned back to working on getting the cameras reset, moving around the rigging so that the angles would be different. The makeup artist had Lance in her chair, touching up his forehead as the hairdresser quickly worked on his hair.

“Well, that was exciting.” Plopping down on the couch, Chris reached for a bottle of water. “You okay?”

“Yeah.” Taking deep breaths, JC closed his eyes and tilted his head down, his lips moving against Jen’s hair. “I’m all right.”

“How’s it possible that she slept through all that?” Dark eyes twinkled with humor, taking in her peaceful face. “You were practically screaming right next to her ear.”

“She’s just like me. Normally a light sleeper, but once she hits the wall, she’s out.” With a self-deprecating grin, he straightened up a bit. “I could tell she was wearing herself out when I talked to her the other day, and I almost told her that it would be okay if she didn’t make the trip. But I was selfish because I really wanted to see her before we left.” His arms tightened around her. “I don’t care if she sleeps the entire time she’s here. She’s where I can keep an eye on her – at least for a few days – and that’s all I needed.”

“It’s okay, Jace. Her world is starting to go a little crazy, so I’m pretty sure you’re what she needs right now, too.” Clearing his throat, Chris arched an eyebrow. “For a guy who’s so dead-set against putting names on anything, mine is a really strong label to be throwing around.”

“I know. It just kind of slipped out.” JC chuckled quietly, one hand beginning to rub slow circles on Jen’s back. “My brain decided to take the back seat for a little while.”

“Maybe it wouldn’t be such a bad thing if your brain stayed in the back seat.” He offered a bottle of water, only to set it back down when JC shook his head. “You know she’s just waiting for you to give the word, right? All you have to do is say it and she’d be all in.”

“You have no idea how badly I want to.” Sighing deeply, he shifted her against him. “But I know how she is. When she’s in, she’s in one hundred percent, and I won’t be something that distracts her from what she’s doing here.” Blue eyes met brown. “She’s always talked about getting her degree and doing something amazing with her life. If I go ahead and make us more, her focus will be divided, and she might decide to step away from things for me. I’m not gonna let her do that.”

“So you just keep letting her wait?”

“She’s not the only one waiting, you know. But if that’s what she wants, then yes.” He looked down when she tightened her arm around his neck, humming softly into his chest before settling again. “If nothing changes, she knows that once she graduates, I’m coming after her. And when I do, she’s gonna have a hard time getting away from me. On the flip side, she also knows that if she finds someone else who’ll make her happier, then she’s free to move on.”

“Sure.” Chris snorted back a laugh. “Right.”

“Yeah, that’s what I’m hoping for.” A smile lifted JC’s features, the angry redness from minutes before fading away. “I’m really hoping I end up being the best thing in her world. But first, I want her to experience everything she can while I’m out of pocket.”

“That’s a good way to look at it. But you’re already the best thing in her world. If you weren’t, I don’t think she would’ve left home before the crack of dawn and driven four hours just to sit on a couch and watch you do the same dance routine over and over for days.”

“She didn’t drive that far to watch him dance.” Diane spoke up as she propped her hip against the arm rest of the couch, a small bottle of juice in her hand. “She came so she could be with him before he left again.” With a smile, she nodded toward the girl in JC’s arms. “That’s love, boys. Not just for Jace, but for all of you, in one way or another.” They all looked up when the director began calling everyone back to their places. “That’s you. I know Sara’s gone for now, but I’m still going to stay here with her.”

“Thanks.” JC grinned toward her as he stood, lifting Jen with him. Leaning over, he laid her back on the soft cushions, reaching for the pillow so he could wrap her arm around it instead of his neck. Making sure she was comfortable, he kissed the top of her head and straightened his clothes, bending down to grab a bottle of water, draining half of it on his way back to set.

*********************

By the time they were given a lunch break, Jen was upright and alert, even if still a little weary. Hugging her pillow to her chest, she smiled as JC headed her direction, then continued her conversation. “Well, I don’t know, Mac. At this point, I’m not exactly a popular face. How many seats are they giving me?” Swinging her feet to the ground, her hand patted the cushion next to her so he’d sit down. “Five? Wow. Okay, so Mom and Maggie, definitely. And you.” Her tone turned warning. “And don’t you dare think of yourself as a seat filler. You’re family.” Lowering the mouthpiece to her shoulder, she gave JC an impish grin. “How about you? Want to come to the Grammys next month?”

“You know I’d love to, Boof, but I just can’t this time.” His arm went around her shoulders, pulling her into his side as he let his chin rest on the top of her head. “We’ll have to shoot for next year.”

“I knew you’d say that, but I wanted to ask anyway. Next year it is.” Jen smiled, stretching up to kiss his cheek before putting the phone back to her ear. “That makes four. How about we count Brian? He’s been so good to me, and I’m sure he’d like to mingle with the Clapton crowd.” She went silent, listening as Mac gave her instructions. “All right. I’ll call Maggie after lunch and get her to talk to him. I’ll have a definite answer for you by four. Will that work?” Shifting with a sigh, she pressed into JC until she could lean her head against his chest. “Sure. Wait, what was that about clothes? Seriously? It has to be designer? You know I’d much rather just look in the shops around Orlando until I find something formal, right?” A groan escaped and she closed her eyes. “Okay, okay. You win. We’ll book the flight for a few days early and look for something in New York. Yes, off the rack. I don’t care what Mom says, I’m not about to pay a fortune for a few yards of fabric that I’ll probably wear once just because it’s got some man’s name not attached by a tag. Especially when we aren’t even doing the red carpet. Thank God.”

JC snorted in laughter, his fingers squeezing her shoulder when she rolled her eyes at him.

“I’m fine. That was Josh, choking on his tongue. Oh … okay.” Her brows rose in surprise, then she held the phone out to him. “He wants to talk to you.”

“Really?” Startled, he took the phone, bringing it up to his ear. “Hello?”

“Ah, the infamous Josh. Or is it JC?”

“Nowadays, it’s mostly JC. Or Jace, if you prefer.” He let out a quick laugh. “Jenny kind of gets special treatment.”

“That’s something you and I have in common, apparently.” Humor was evident in Mac’s tone. “But she and I seem to be having a difference of opinion.”

“I can tell, but I’m not going to be much help, Mac.” Hugging her to him, he smiled when her arm wrapped around his waist. “I think she looks fantastic in pajama pants and a T-shirt, so the dress doesn’t matter to me. Plus, she’s probably the only girl you’ll find who’s actually excited that she doesn’t have to do the red carpet.”

“I was afraid of that.” With a sigh, Mac took a moment to collect his thoughts. “Would she at least agree to shop in the Fashion District?”

“I don’t know, maybe.” Laughing under his breath, he looked to her. “How about if you agree to go shopping in the Fashion District? I’m not sure exactly what that means, but surely you could give the poor guy a break.” Jen narrowed her eyes at him, biting her lip. “Come on, Boof. It’s your first Grammys. Even if you aren’t walking the carpet, don’t you want to look fabulous when you’re accepting your award in front of music’s finest?”

“You’re banking on the exceptionally slim chance that I’ll actually win.”

“Okay, how about this?” He lowered his voice. “I can’t go with you, but I’ll definitely be watching. You could always pick something so I know you’re wishing I was there, whether you win or not.”

“I …” Surprisingly, she hesitated, her brow furrowing as she looked at him. “Josh …”

“Please?” Leaning down, he kissed her softly. “For me?”

“Ugh … okay.” Closing her eyes, she shook her head, mumbling under her breath as he grinned triumphantly. “Totally not fair.”

“All right, Mac. You’ve got a winner.” His body shook with quiet laughter. “She’ll do the Fashion District, but don’t be shocked if she still ends up with something off a rack somewhere.”

“At least it’ll be a very trendy something off the rack.” Mac’s voice was satisfied. “And nobody said she could only wear it once. I’m sure there’ll be plenty of events in the future where it’ll be appropriate.”

“That’s true.” Looking down at her, he squeezed his arm around her. “Once she gets in the swing of it, she’ll get excited. I think she’s just worn out right now.”

“I could hear it in her voice.” The older man’s tone took on an almost paternal edge. “She is getting some rest while she’s there, isn’t she? I know she got an early start this morning, but she shouldn’t have much of anything on her plate other than spending time relaxing and watching you film.”

“We’re keeping her comfortable. The napping is totally up to her.” She huffed in exasperation, sending him a mock glare. “By the time you get her back, she should be well-rested and ready to work. Right, Jenny?”

“That’s right.” She reached up and took the phone from him. “And that’s enough worrying about me. They just broke for lunch, so I’ll call you back later, okay?” For a second, she listened, then smiled, her gaze jumping back to JC’s face. “Uh huh. I hear you. Yeah, me, too. Okay, bye.”

“I like him.” JC watched as she ended the call and flipped the phone closed. “He’s obviously looking out for you.”

“Well, he likes you, too. He just threatened to drop me as a client if I ever let you get away.” Her hand patted his thigh, then she leaned forward to drop the phone into her bag and reach down for her shoes. “I’m starving, so I’m sure you’re hungry. Ready to eat?”

“Yep. I was just making sure you were okay before heading that way.” He stood, matching her pace as they walked slowly toward where lunch was being served. “I’m sorry about earlier. Sara’s not exactly our favorite person on the crew.”

“She’s a real piece of work, huh?” Jen laughed under her breath. “As extreme as she was, I don’t guess I can hold it against her. She was just defending her territory.”

“Her territory, huh?” Arching a brow at her, he draped his arm across her shoulders. “Exactly what would her territory be?”

“If looks could kill, she’d have had me buried ten times over, so I’d guess she’s decided to claim you, lover boy.”

“And that will never happen.” He came to a sudden stop, pulling her to a halt and turning to face her. “You know you don’t have to worry about her, right?”

“With her winning personality? I’m not exactly shaking in my boots.” She shrugged light-heartedly, smiling up at him. “She is really pretty though, Josh. And accessible. I wouldn’t blame you if …”

“She’s nothing compared to you.” Tugging her into a hug, he shook his head in frustration. “How can you not see … Joey doesn’t call you Hot Stuff for nothing, you know.”

“As much as I love him, Joe Bear doesn’t really have the highest of standards.” A laugh escaped into his chest. “It’s okay, I promise. I have other strong points to make up for it.”

“One of these days, you’re going to see yourself the way I see you.” She felt him leaning down closer to her ear. “I’ll make sure of it.”

“Whatever you say.” Pulling away, she began walking again, joining the end of the line for what appeared to be deli sandwiches. “One question though. Sara said that she handles your schedule and the details. Does that include guests, too?”

“Yeah. Why?”

“I got my trip booked for May and I’m not too into the idea of having to work everything out with her.”

“Really?” His eyes lit up and he couldn’t help his grin. “Don’t worry about it. E-mail me your details and I’ll take care of it. When are you coming out?”

“I’ll be flying out late on the 18th, landing in Stockholm the afternoon of the 19th, then staying for three weeks. If you check your calendar and I need to fly in somewhere else, just let me know. Tessa set me up with an awesome travel agent who should be able to make changes fairly easily.” She picked up two plates, passing one to him before casting a glance his direction. “Think you guys can put up with me that long?”

“Are you kidding?” He wrapped an arm around her, pulling her back against his chest. “You could stay all summer and it wouldn’t be long enough.”

“Good answer.” She laughed, leaning into him. “Very good answer.”

----------------------------------------

February 28, 1997

JC looked up when he heard someone coming down the stairs, grinning when Joey came into the living room, rubbing the sleep out of his eyes. “Hey, Joe. Is the TV too loud?”

“No, I just woke up and remembered why you were down here.” Scratching his stomach, Joey yawned and plopped down on the couch. “Tonight’s the night, huh?”

“Yeah. I’m just hoping I’ve got the right channel.” He reached out and picked up the remote, raising the volume just a tad. “A live broadcast from the U.S. is kind of hard to find at two in the morning.”

“The Grammys are pretty much a world-wide thing. I’m sure it’s on there somewhere.” Chris shuffled into the room, his fingers combing through disheveled hair. “You should probably be more concerned that they leave it in English.”

“It’s live. I figure they can’t really dub over it that fast.” A commercial ended and the familiar ceremony graphics began flashing across the screen, Swedish subtitles scrolling rapidly across the bottom. “Or they could just do that.” Settling back into the cushions, he looked between the guys on either side of him. “You guys don’t have to stay up with me. We’ve got a big day tomorrow.”

“Hey, we can sleep on the plane, too.” Justin spoke up as he and Lance came through the door, each taking one of the recliners. “We want to see Jenny’s big debut. Did they talk her into performing with them?”

“Not even Eric Clapton could get her up on that stage.” JC laughed, shaking his head. “She said they were respectful of her decision, especially after she reminded them that he and Babyface were the ones nominated for Male Pop Vocal and Record of the Year and she wanted them to have that recognition.” Fighting back a yawn, he stretched out his legs. “They’re supposed to be sitting right behind Clapton’s group, though. If we see him, we should be able to find her.”

“You mean like that?” Joey gestured toward the screen, where she was perfectly visible, seated on the aisle. He let out a low whistle. “That’s a killer dress, man.”

The strapless gown was fitted across the bodice, and sparkled under the production lights, but it was difficult to tell exactly what color it was. What drew JC’s attention were her gleaming accessories: his necklace and bracelet, shining brightly as the camera panned back over the audience until she was no longer on the screen. Biting back a smile, he glanced over when Lance let out a deep yawn. “We may have to take shifts. Three hours is a long time, and I’m pretty sure hers will be one of the very last categories.”

“Don’t worry, Jace. We won’t let you miss her.” Pushing up from the couch, Chris headed for the kitchen. “I think we’re gonna need some coffee, though.”

“You don’t drink coffee.”

At that moment, Ellen DeGeneres launched into her opening number, leaving them all in silence as Chris chuckled, stepping out of the room. “If that’s a sign of things to come, then I drink it tonight.”

It was a good call, and by the time they were getting to the biggest awards of the night, they’d gone through nearly three pots.

“Okay, here we go.” Justin sat forward, resting his arms on his knees as he focused on the television. “This is her.”

They all imitated his position, leaning toward the television, intently watching as the nominees were announced. JC grinned when they zoomed in on Jen for her announcement, her smile genuine, but he could see the nerves in her eyes.

“And the Song of the Year Grammy goes to …” The dramatic pause seemed to go on forever, before the presenter finally read the card. “Jennifer Lawson for Change the World.”

The group around him jumped to their feet, cheering, just as the people around her stood, applauding her victory. That’s my girl. JC smiled as he watched her slowly rise from her seat, a dazed look on her face as she turned into Lisa’s tight hug, then reached out to grasp Mac’s arm, a trembling smile lifting her lips. She took a deep breath, then moved into the aisle, only to be stopped after two steps by Eric Clapton putting a hand on her shoulder, pulling her close to lean down and say something in her ear.

Whatever he said was exactly what she needed to hear, because she rewarded him with a bright grin, said “Thank you” and gave him a quick hug before pulling away to head for the stage, pausing only when Celine Dion reached out and grabbed her hand, giving her a big nod and a thumbs up. As one of the ushers helped her up the stairs in the long gown, the stage lights reflected off the glittering fabric, finally revealing the vibrant blue color that flowed around her legs like water. It swirled as she moved across the stage, accepting the trophy from the presenters and turning to face the arena, humor entering her expression when she had to look up at the microphone, laughter flowing across the audience as she waited for them to lower it to her level.

“I may be little, but I am fierce.” She laughed with the crowd before taking a steadying breath. “This is definitely unexpected, and I’m so unprepared, it’s not even funny.” Both of her hands gripped the base of the Grammy, supporting its weight. “This has been such a crazy year, and there’s so much to say, but it seems they like to keep these things short, so if I forget someone, please forgive me. Mom, thank you for everything. I love you.” Swallowing thickly, her eyes turned upward. “Daddy, I hope you’re proud. I miss you.” She lowered her gaze back to the room. “Josh, I wish you were here. Thanks for always having my back, for having faith in me even when I don’t, and for making me smile when I don’t feel like it. Now it’s your turn. Show them what you’ve got, and I’ll see you soon. Mac, none of this would’ve been possible without you. Thank you so much for taking such good care of me. Professor Summers, thank you for seeing something special in me. Maggie, Brian and the rest of my Orlando family, thanks for helping me create a place to call home.” Looking down at the gleaming trophy, she laughed under her breath. “Thanks to the Funky Bunch for having confidence when I lose it, hugs when I need them and for keeping me laughing.”

Clearing her throat, she raised her head. “Mr. Clapton, it was an honor to meet you tonight, but to have you take my little song and breathe life into it is a dream come true. I can’t imagine that it could’ve been better.” She paused as there was a wave of applause, the camera cutting away briefly to show Eric nodding at her with a smile. “I was seventeen when I wrote the lyrics for Change the World, and it took a year for me to finally decide that I was happy with the arrangement. If I could possibly end this with an inspirational thought, it would be this: We are never too young, and we are never too old. But we must be driven, because it’s up to us to do the work that makes our dreams a reality.” A deep breath lifted her shoulders as her fingers came up to play with the heart pendant around her neck, bringing it to her lips quickly before dropping it back against her skin and sending a bright grin toward the cameras, raising the trophy as high as she could. “Thank you so much.”

“Now that was a shout-out.” Joey dropped back down on the couch as she followed the presenters off stage, his elbow nudging JC in the side playfully. “We should leave her a message for when she finally gets to break away.”

“You guys go ahead.” JC smiled as Lance reached for the phone. “I’ll leave my own after you’re done.”

Their abundance of coffee was obvious as the four of them left her a long – and hilarious – voicemail, all of them chiming in with their own version of congratulations, sometimes trying to talk over each other. JC held back his laughter as they decided to wind it down with a very harmonious goodbye before ending the call. “You’re all nuts.”

“Yeah, but she loves us anyway.” Lance winked as he handed him the phone, then passed a look over the others as he strode out of the room. “I think I’m gonna turn in for at least a few hours before we hit the road.” The hint was obvious, and they followed him toward the stairs, Chris casting a knowing glance toward JC before grinning and pushing Justin out the door.

Shaking his head, JC laughed quietly as he dialed her number, sitting back against the cushions as he waited for the indicated tone. “The Funky Bunch got their turn, so now it’s mine. Congratulations, Jenny. You deserve it. I wish I could’ve been there with you, but you can totally look forward to a little celebration when you come out in May. The next three months had better go by fast, because I can’t wait to see you. Until then, hug Coda really tight and give that necklace another kiss for me.” He felt humor lighten his tone. “We’ll definitely have to find somewhere to go so you can wear that dress again. You look gorgeous in blue, and I’d love to see you in it, knowing you’re wearing it just for me.” Clearing his throat, he leaned his head back and closed his eyes. “I can’t believe my girl just won her first Grammy. The first of many, I can feel it. I’m so proud of you, Boof. Soak it all in and enjoy your night. We hit the road in a few hours for the tour, but I’ll call again as soon as I’m able. Talk to you soon.”

His thumb cut the connection before the next words could roll off his tongue.

“I love you.”

May 19, 1997

Jen couldn’t help laughing when she saw the mountain of a black man waiting in the arrivals area of the airport, looking bored as he held a sign printed with her name in black. As she came closer, she saw that not only was 'Jenny' in bold marker on his poster, but the guys had all written their nicknames for her around it in various colors. The rest of the space was filled with sparkly stickers, smiley faces and other silly little pictures. Shaking her head and adjusting her oversized backpack, she carefully pulled her blue carry-on bag and picked up her pace, determined to put the poor guy out of his misery.

“Hi. I think you’re looking for me.” Flashing back quickly to another airport a long time ago, she tilted her head back to see his arched brow and gave him a tired smile. “I’m so sorry you’re having to hold that. Have you been waiting long?”

“Jenny?” The surprise was evident in his tone. “Jen Lawson?”

“In the flesh.” Her nose wrinkled as she sighed. “I’m sorry. They didn’t tell me who I was meeting.”

“First, tell me who calls you what.” His big fingers tapped on the edges of his sign. “Just so I can be sure.”

She let her eyes move over the board, laughing at the scrawled names as she identified each one, then arched an eyebrow at him. “They swapped nicknames before they wrote them. Who wrote what?” She bit her lip to keep from grinning. “Just so I can be sure.”

“Jace told me you’d ask that. To be honest, I can’t make out half of what any of them write, so I wouldn’t be able to say for sure.” He let out a booming laugh. “I’ve seen a few pictures, Jenny, but they don’t do you justice. I’m Lonnie, your boy’s keeper.”

“It’s nice to meet you, Lonnie.” Beginning to move forward, she hesitated. “Are you a hugger? Or should I keep my distance?”

“I …” Surprised again, he started, looking down at the girl who wasn’t even tall enough to reach his chest. Her smile was impish, giving her a child-like expression and he couldn’t keep from propping the sign against her bag and opening his arms. “Bring it in, kid.”

The smile became a grin as she stepped into his arms and sighed, barely able to reach around him. “Thanks. It’s been a really long day.”

“No problem. Just … never tell those guys I was hugging you in the airport. They’d never listen to me again.”

“I won’t say a word. I promise.” She laughed, stepping away from him and claiming her bag again. “I had to check two bags, so we’ll need to grab those before we can go.”

“Sure thing. It’s down this way.”

Moving down the large hallway, they veered to the right and rounded a corner into the baggage claim area. They had perfect timing, both of her bags floating around the carousel minutes after they arrived. Once the bags were on the ground, she let her backpack swing around so that she could unlock the zippers. “Can I go ahead and give you something?”

“Yeah, sure.” Lonnie eyed her curiously as she pulled out a sturdy gift bag and held it out to him. “What’s this?”

“I asked Lynn to make sure how many were on your team. There’s a gift for each of you.” Smiling up at him, she straightened the pack again and grasped the handles of the two smaller rolling bags. “Just a little 'thank you' for taking care of my guys.”

“Well, thanks.” Reaching for the largest bag, he began leading the way toward the exit. “We’re just doing our jobs.”

“No one simply works with the Funky Bunch. You become family.” She sped up to keep up with his large strides. “Did they really send you out by yourself to pick me up?”

“Not exactly.” As they crossed the parking lot, he looked down at the bag he was pulling behind him. “This thing’s kinda heavy. I know ladies pack more than men, but did you bring the kitchen sink with you?”

“Nope. That would be the treat bag.”

“The treat bag?” He arched a brow at her. “What’s the treat bag?”

“You’ll see when they open it.” Shaking her head, she sighed. “I’m pretty sure they’d have me sleeping on the street if I’d left it at home.”

“Okay then.” He stopped behind a black van, tapping on the tinted window of the rear doors. “This is us. Bags in the back, then you’re in the middle.”

Not giving it a thought, she helped him load the bags – keeping her backpack – and moved around to the side of the van, reaching for the door handle.

“Hold on a second, Jen.” Lonnie leaned against the van casually, keeping an eye on a family a few cars away, two teenage girls laughing as they pulled bags from their trunk. “Did you have a good flight?”

“I suppose. The first flight was overnight, so I got to sleep a little.” Glancing toward the family as they began walking toward the airport, she turned her attention back to the man beside her, giving him an odd look. “It makes me nervous to travel alone, so I don’t usually get a lot of rest. I’d rather have a buddy with me, but it is what it is.”

“That’s cool.” Once the girls were far beyond hearing distance, he focused back on her. “Sorry. Teen girls tend to go a little crazy.”

“It’s okay.” Her brow furrowed in confusion. “Crazy over what?”

“This guy.” He reached out and slid the door open for her, revealing JC sitting on the far side of the bench seat. “He’s a bit of a crowd pleaser.”

“There’s my girl.” JC smiled, already sliding toward her on the seat. “Hey, Boof.”

She didn’t say a word, just grinned brightly and scrambled up into the van and into his arms. Hugging him tightly around the neck, she closed her eyes and buried her face in his shoulder, breathing deeply to take in the scent of his cologne. His fingers worked their way into her hair, and she sighed against him. “I’ve missed you, Josh.”

“I’ve missed you, too, but let’s get this backpack out of the way so I can really hug you, okay?” He kissed her forehead, then pulled away with a laugh, his hands coming down to work on the straps of the pack. “This thing’s almost as big as you are. How were you standing up straight?”

“Very carefully.” Her brow arched as she let the bag slide down her arms and fall to the floor of the van, immediately leaning back into him.

“See? Much better.” Wrapping his arms tightly around her, he lifted her onto his lap, smiling when she curled into his chest and relaxed against him. Leaning down, he kissed the side of her head, then pressed his cheek against her hair. Unconsciously, he began rocking back and forth, his breath tickling her ear as he spoke softly. “I can’t believe you’re finally here.”

Neither of them reacted when Lonnie closed the door, the van lurching as he got into the passenger side front seat. Looking over his shoulder at the pair behind him, he began to grin before turning to his partner behind the steering wheel. “Well, Kenny … this is Jen Lawson.”

“This little fairy is what all the fuss is about?” Kenny’s eyes widened as he took a good look in the rearview mirror. “I expected her to be … I don’t know. Definitely taller.” He laughed quietly as he put the van in reverse. “She kind of sparkles, doesn’t she? Looks like a dark-haired Tinkerbell.”

“Tink. I like it.” Lonnie nodded to himself with a smile. “It fits. That’ll be her code on the radio.”

“She gets a radio code?” Brows rose sharply as Kenny glanced his way, then pulled into traffic. “Is she going to be around that much?”

“All I know is all five of our guys have declared her precious cargo, so she gets the royal treatment.” Taking another look at JC and Jen, he furrowed his brow. “We’ll have to sit him down and get the full picture. I swear I’ve seen her somewhere before.”

Completely unaware of the conversation in the front seat, Jen let the fingers of one hand comb through his hair, her fingertips scratching lightly against his skin. Looking up, her eyes met his and she returned his smile, then stretched to kiss his cheek. Her voice was soft as she leaned closer to him. “I couldn’t wait to get here.”

“You’re all we’ve been talking about for days.” One of his hands came to her face, his gaze bouncing over her features until he focused on her mouth. Running his thumb over her lips, he lowered his voice to a whisper and let his forehead rest against hers. “Has anything changed for you?”

Brown eyes sparkled with her grin. “Not at all.”

“Good.” Taking a deep breath, he leaned into her, his lips covering hers for a kiss that felt so good, she wanted to cry. When she pressed further into him, he tightened his arm around her, allowing no space between them as his mouth caught hers again. He felt her sigh against him, and his heart skipped a few beats when she took charge for a few more kisses.

“Ahem.” Lonnie cleared his throat loudly from the front seat, not bothering to try hiding his grin. “Look alive, kids. Another few minutes and we’ll be home.”

Jen backed away a few inches, her eyes widening as she remembered where they were. JC laughed when her cheeks began to burn a bright red and she groaned, hiding her face against his chest. “Sorry, guys. I’m not really into PDA …” Suddenly, she sat up straight, her face still pink as she turned to look at Lonnie. “Actually, no, I’m not sorry. I haven’t seen him since January, and I forgot where I was. Get over it.”

“And Tink’s had her first twinkle fit.” Lonnie choked out before both he and Kenny burst into laughter as the van pulled into a driveway and parked. “It doesn’t matter, Jenny. You’ll just have to get used to one of us always being around. Eventually, you won’t even consider us ‘public’. Besides, this guy is ridiculously tame compared to most of the bodies I’ve had to guard. I’ve had his back for nearly six months without even a blip on his radar. It’s about time he got some action.”

“Six months, huh?” Her brows arched in humor as she looked back to JC, who just shrugged with a smile and quickly kissed her lips one last time. “And why did he call me Tink?”

“Are you really surprised? You haven’t exactly been in touching distance. And you do kind of look like Tinkerbell.” She felt his hands on her waist, then he was sliding her off his lap and onto the seat. “Let me grab your bag, then I’ll help you down.” As he stepped over her and hopped out of the van, she saw him licking his lips, laughing quietly as he put on her backpack and reached for her. “Come on, Boof. J’s probably watching the door, just waiting for you to walk in.”

He lifted her from the van, holding her up just long enough to whisper in her ear. “Dr. Pepper, huh? You keep finding new favorites for me. Still doesn’t live up to the chocolate cake, though.” With a wink, he kissed her cheek and set her down, looking back to where Kenny and Lonnie were unloading her bags. “Do you guys need any help?”

“Nope. We’ve got it.” Kenny waved around the door. “Get her on inside. We’ll be right behind you.”

“Please be careful with the blue bag. Special things in that one.” Jen reached into the front seat to pick up the gift bag. “And I’m taking your bag in, Lonnie.”

“Sure thing, kid.”

JC draped an arm across her shoulders as they walked to the front steps. “Is the blue bag the treat bag?”

“Nope.”

“You did remember the treat bag, right?” He fought a grin. “Chris might rebel if he doesn’t get his cookies.”

“Oh, don’t worry.” She laughed. “I definitely brought the treat bag.”

“Then what’s in the blue bag?” Blue eyes focused on her, trying to read her expression. “What did you do?”

“You’ll just have to wait and see.” When they made it to the door, he stepped back, motioning for her to go ahead. “Are you tossing me to the wolves or what?”

Before he could answer, the door flew open and Justin was stepping out, wrapping his arms around her and lifting her off the ground. “Get in here, Shorty. It’s been too long.”

“Hi, J.” With a bright smile, she flung an arm around his neck, her face pressing into his shoulder with the strength of his hug. “I think you’ve gotten even taller, haven’t you?”

“Maybe a little, yeah.”

“Well, stop it.” She laughed against him, just barely getting Lonnie’s bag on the table by the door as Justin carried her through the front hall toward what appeared to be the living room. “Or I really will have to start calling you Jolly Green.”

“Just try it. I know all your weak spots, sis.” He chuckled quietly, kissing the top of her head and putting her down before turning to yell toward the staircase. “Hey guys! Jenny’s in the house!”

A rumble of footsteps came from several different directions above them, all headed for the stairs. Chris was the first one down, grinning widely as he pulled her in for a tight hug. “Good to see you, Gracie. How was the flight?”

“Long, but worth it.” There was a little weariness in her voice as she went on her toes and looped her arms around his neck, but the excitement in her eyes lessened his concern. “If you think last year was incredible, just wait until I tell you what’s been happening the last few weeks. You’re Still the One finally found a home, and she took two other tracks with it.”

“That’s awesome. You can tell us all about it over dinner.” He looked down at her with a smile. “Right now, we’ll get the hellos out of the way and let Jace get you settled in, okay?”

“Sounds great.” She kissed his cheek, then released him as Joey’s arms came around her from behind. “Okay, Joe Bear. Your turn.”

“Damn right, it is.” Laughing, he spun her around and picked her up against his chest. “We’ve missed you, Hot Stuff. And it dings my pride a little bit that my parents can’t stop telling me how they wish they could adopt you.” Leaning in, he lowered his voice. “You know, since neither of their sons is going to be able to snag you.”

“Whatever, Joe.” Shaking her head, she laughed under her breath. “But they kind of already have, I guess. My Family Dinner crowd seems to keep changing, but they’re pretty much always there.”

“Family Dinner?” His brows arched as he kissed the side of her head. “What’s Family Dinner?”

“Every other Friday, I host Family Dinner for anybody who can make it.” Her smile grew as he set her back down. “Maggie and Brian, Adam and whoever he’s dating, your folks and Steve, Matt, Amber and Chloe, Mom and Mac, and Tessa, Shan and their three boys are my regulars. Nick, Sam and Jake, Mark, Janine, and a few others float in and out, depending on whether they have plans.”

“Damn, Jen. Seriously?”

“Yeah. It’s fun. I fix the main dish and desserts, and everybody else just brings whatever sides they’re in the mood for. Your mom always has to take a copy of my recipes for the night home with her, and Big Joe won’t leave until we’ve either played a game of chess or I’ve spent some time on the piano for him.” She laughed again. “And Steve somehow manages to take a plate of leftovers home every time.”

“That’s one of the things I really miss, Girlie.” Lance stepped to her side, his arm going around her shoulders.

“What? Leftovers?” Jen hugged him quickly, then moved back enough to pull at his shirt. “It looks like you need a few, Mississippi.”

“Not leftovers. And I’m eating fine.” He rolled his eyes and she laughed as he pulled her back to him. “The meals were always amazing, but my favorite part was listening to you play and hum or sing while you were working on something. Jace plays on his keyboard all the time, and he’s really good, but it’s just not the same.”

“Well, I’d hope he’s really good.” Her brow arched at him playfully. “I taught him.” Lowering her voice, she spoke softly. “Maybe he’ll let me borrow it once or twice while I’m here. I’ve got some new stuff I’m working on that I’d like you guys to hear.”

“That’d be awesome, Jen.” With a smile, he kissed her cheek. “Can’t wait.”

Jen had made her way over to say hello to Lynn and Diane when she noticed Justin about to drag the largest suitcase toward the stairs. “Hey, J. Not that one.”

“What?” He gave her a confused look and let the heavy bag settle back on the floor. “Jeez, that thing has to weigh nearly as much as Chris.”

“That’s why it’s got wheels, little bro.”

“Okay, well … if you don’t want it upstairs, then where do you want it?”

“Right here.” She went to him with a smile and took the handle, moving it to the middle of the floor and laying it down. Looking up as she removed the lock from the zippers, a wary glance was passed around the room. “No pushing and no fighting. Everybody has their own, and it has your name on it. Get yours, step aside, and I’ll sort out the rest. Understood?”

“Oh, man.” Chris bounced on his toes, drawing an odd look from Lonnie. “The treat bag. Sweet!”

“Just remember to make sure your container is closed when you’re done, or your stuff will dry out before you can finish it.” Taking a deep breath, she unzipped the bag and flipped the top flap open, revealing stacks of sealed rectangular food containers before moving quickly out of the way. “Okay, guys. Have at it.”

“Holy hell.” Lonnie laughed as bodies dove for the middle of the room, intent on being the first to claim their treat. He glanced to where JC was leaning against the wall beside him, watching the brawl with amusement. “You’d think she just opened up Christmas in here. Aren’t you getting in on that?”

“No way.” With a grin, JC shook his head, snickering when Justin came out of the fray first, hugging the plastic container to his chest as if it were a baby. “Jen always takes care of me, so even if she didn’t make me my own, I’m sure there’ll be something left.”

Joey came toward them, slightly rumpled but looking triumphant as he carried his treasure. “She made zeppole. My favorite.” Carefully lifting the lid, he groaned as the scent of the sugary dessert floated up to him. Turning around, he sent her a grin. “Thanks, Hot Stuff! Love you, baby.” As she shook her head and laughed, he took one of the little powdered sugar-coated treats and popped it in his mouth, then offered the bowl to Lonnie and Kenny. “Seriously, guys. You haven’t lived until you’ve eaten something from Jen’s kitchen.”

“Okay, thanks.” Kenny reached in and took one, looking it over before shrugging and popping it in his mouth as Joey had. His brows shot up as he began chewing, the sweet, buttery flavor flooding over his taste buds, the little puff so light that it seemed to just dissolve on his tongue. “My God. She made that?”

“Yep. She’s a whiz with lyrics and magical with a whisk.” Joey narrowed his eyes playfully at JC and nudged him with his elbow. “Lucky dog.”

“You know it.” With a laugh, JC moved across the now empty floor, crouching by the bag to pick out his container before looking up at Jen. “Do you need help with the rest?”

“Sure.” She came over and knelt next to him, sorting out the unlabeled containers. “Diane and Lynn, these are for you. I’m sorry. The guys were around all the time, so I know their favorites. I didn’t know what you’d like, so I just put together a mix for each of you.” A smile formed as the ladies took the plastic bowls. “The next time you’re all at home, I’ll have everybody over. I’ll do better, I promise.”

“Honey, you were feeding a small army of men at least four times a week.” Lynn stepped close to give her a hug. “You didn’t need us adding to it.” Lifting the container to look through it, she hummed. “My Lord, are those fudge brownies?”

“With extra fudge and chocolate chunks.” Jen winked at JC, then reached up to pat his shoulder. “This one likes his chocolate.”

“Really?” Looking through the clear bowl, he saw the fudgy squares stacked tightly against each other. “You’re gonna kill me, Boof.” He groaned, then leaned down to kiss the top of her head. “Thank you.”

“You’re welcome.” She laughed, hugging him around the waist before reaching back into the case, stacking up several other containers before pulling out one larger bowl. “This one is for Johnny. Will we be seeing him at all?”

“Oh, yeah. With the album releasing next week, he’ll definitely be around. We’ll probably meet up with him in Berlin.”

“Okay. I’ll make sure to pack it in when we leave on Wednesday.” Setting Johnny’s bowl to the side, she gestured to the rest. “And these are for the security team.” With his help, she gathered the bowls and delivered them to Lonnie and Kenny. “There’s a mix for each of you. I figured you guys could trade things around until you have what you like.”

The door behind them opened and three more large men came in, waving quickly before opening a door in the hallway and heading to what she assumed was the basement. Kenny joined them, jumping in with the bowls still in his hands. A laugh came from one of the new faces, and Kenny’s voice carried back to them. “No, seriously. You’ve got to try this stuff. She’s like their own personal Betty Crocker.”

Lonnie nodded to the last in line, then picked up his gift bag and turned back to her with a smile. “Thanks, Jen. That was the rest of our team. We need to discuss some things before we head out tonight.” His glance skipped to JC. “The reservations are for eight, so we probably need to be ready to load up in about an hour. Is that doable?”

“Yeah, I think so.” JC looked at Jen. “I know you’ve had a long day, but we wanted to take you out for your first night here. Maybe see some of the lights on the way back. Are you up to it?”

“For food and sightseeing? Absolutely.” She gestured to the jeans, tank top and flannel shirt she was wearing. “I heard 'reservations' … do I need to change? I don’t think I brought anything really dressy.”

“No, you’re perfect.” His arm went around her, pulling her to his side. “You look great. It’s just that anytime we all go out together, we have to call ahead so the restaurant isn’t locked down by how large our group is.”

“Ah. Okay.” Nodding, she glanced at her watch. “So I’ve got an hour to get settled, then?”

“Yeah. Let’s get your things upstairs and maybe you can relax for a little while.” JC reached down for her backpack and grabbed the larger of her suitcases, then let his focus land back on Lonnie. “We’ll be ready to go whenever you guys are.”

“Great. See you in a bit.”

Jen grasped the handle of the blue bag, looking up to see JC waiting for her at the foot of the staircase. He smiled, tilting his head toward the stairs. “After you.”

“I don’t think I ever actually said hello.” She glanced around and started up, stopping on the second step to turn for a quick kiss. “Hi.” He leaned toward her as she pulled away and she couldn’t help her grin. “Where am I going?”

“Uh …” He blinked for a second, clearing his thoughts. “Right at the top, first door on the left.”

“Okay.” Up the stairs she went, giggling under her breath until she realized there were no footsteps following her. At the top, she turned around, looking down to where he was watching her. “You coming?”

“Yep.” Nodding, he sent her a look she couldn’t quite read, then bounded up the steps toward her. “I’m just … come on.” Grabbing her free hand, he pulled her after him into the bedroom, closing the door behind him and setting her bags by the free bed. Taking the blue bag from her, he laid it on the comforter, then gathered her against him. “I’m just really, really happy you’re here.”

“Me, too.” She snuggled into him, sighing deeply as she relaxed in his arms. A smile tilted her lips when she felt him moving, his fingers combing into her hair as he lowered his chin to the top of her head. Leaning back so she could see him, her gaze met his, one of her hands coming to his face as he came closer, his eyes closing as his lips met hers once, twice, three times, the last kiss deeper than any of the others.

Pulling away, he let his forehead rest against hers, his eyes clashing with hers. “And you have no idea how badly I wish I didn’t have to let you go back.”

“Welcome to my world.” Laughing quietly, she wrapped her arms around his neck. “It hurts every time.”

“God, Boof.” Blue eyes darkened in regret. “I’m so sorry.”

“It’s okay, Josh.” Stretching up, she kissed him softly. “It’s really okay. Because then I come home after a long day and there’s this e-mail waiting from you that makes me laugh until I cry. Or we get to talk for hours on the phone – sometimes until you fall asleep – and it’s like you’re right there with me.” She let her fingers gently massage his neck. “Some days, I’ll be just about ready to throw in the towel and all of a sudden, I get this peaceful feeling … and I wonder if maybe that’s when you’re thinking of me.”

“All the time.” He lifted his head to press his lips to her forehead. “I think about you all the time, Jenny. I promise.”

“I know you do. Probably about as much as I think of you.” With a smile, she stepped away from him and toward the bed. “Which brings us to the blue bag.” Reaching in her pocket, she pulled out her luggage key and unlocked the little padlock on the zippers. “I’ve either missed or am going to miss everybody’s birthdays, so I’m catching up in this one trip.” Lifting the flap, she revealed a collection of brightly wrapped packages. “But I’ve got a few extra things for you.”

“Jen. You didn’t have to do that.” His arms wrapped around her from behind as she began unloading the bag. “Just having you here is enough for me.”

“And I appreciate that.” She leaned back against him, her fingers squeezing his forearms as she tilted her head to look up at him. “But I’ve made more money in the last year than I’ll ever know what to do with, and things definitely don’t seem to be slowing down. Some really cool stuff is in the works that we’ll talk about over dinner. Mom’s been playing with some investments for me that have totally paid off, I have a few ideas for some things in the future … and I know for a fact that as hard as you guys have been working at this, you still haven’t been paid a dime. So for now, just let me spoil you. Please?”

“I don’t want …” He sighed when a pleading expression crossed her face, and he tightened his arms around her, kissing the top of her head. “Okay, okay. Thank you.”

“Don’t thank me yet. You haven’t seen what I brought.” Laughing quietly, she continued to sort the packages. “The other guys should be happy, though. A Bulova sports watch for J, this awesome Superman necklace for Joey, an autographed promotional print of Enter the Dragon for Chris – don’t even ask how I found it – and a pre-release copy of Tim McGraw’s new album for Lance. Tim was even nice enough to autograph an extra CD and liner notes so I could have it framed for him.”

“They’re going to think it’s Christmas, Boof.” He let out a chuckle, looking down as she handed him a small, flat package. “What’s this?”

“Santa thinks you’ve been a good boy this year.” Grinning up at him, she picked up a stack of gifts. “The rest are yours. Mom sent that one and said you needed to open it first.”

“Really?” He moved to sit on his bed and she followed him. “What would your mom have sent me?”

“I have no idea.” She shrugged, tilting her head. “She wouldn’t tell me.”

“Huh.” His brows arched as he lifted the lid off the box, a grin immediately brightening his face as he pulled out the framed photo. With a laugh, he kept the frame facing him as he took the sticky note off the edge, holding it out so she could read it: Josh, Jen would never have given this to you herself, so I’m doing it for her. Enjoy.

“Good God.” Her eyes widened, her brain racing through the possibilities. “Do I even want to know?”

“It’s really cute.” He turned the photo around, and she laughed at the image of herself blowing a kiss at the camera before climbing into the car for the ride to the Grammy ceremony, the blue dress sparkling behind her. “Actually, it’s kind of perfect.” He let his thumb run over the glass, taking in every detail. “That dress …” Trailing off, his gaze came up to her. “Boof, you blew it out of the water.”

“Hold that thought.” A smile formed as she passed him another small box. “This one next.”

“Okay.” The photo was set aside, his fingers working over the seams of the paper. Once he had the box opened, his brow furrowed for a second before he pulled out a somewhat shiny blue tie. “A tie?”

“You said we needed to find somewhere to go so I could wear it again, and I’m holding you to it.” She took the tie from him and held it next to the lamp, setting off a few sparkles in the material. “The shop where I found the dress was owned by a girl named Cassie. She’s just getting started trying to build her business and when she heard that her design would be on national television, she was more than willing to finish the alterations I needed in the time frame I had. Then I heard your message, so I stopped back in to see her before we had to fly out. She was totally thrilled to make a matching tie for me and promised that she could do a redesign of the dress so I could wear it again.” Handing it back to him, she grinned. “You don’t have to wait until then to wear it, but if we’re going somewhere that requires me to be shiny, then you’re going to sparkle, too.”

“I’m not sure where we’ll go, but I’ll figure it out.” He smiled, tucking the tie back into its box. “And now I’ll be prepared, whenever I do.”

“Exactly.” Turning, she picked up the largest box and set it in his lap. “I’m hoping you like these.”

Making quick work of the wrapping on this one, he lifted the lid to find a multi-colored collection of short- and long-sleeved dress shirts. “Oh, wow. You got every color, didn’t you?”

“Actually, yeah.” She laughed. “I don’t know much about fashion, but I know you’re picky about your dress shirts. These came from Cassie, too. I can’t tell you what the fabric is, but it’s the most comfortable stuff I’ve ever worn. I bought a few shirts for myself when I got the dress, then I called a few weeks later to see if she could find it in more guy friendly colors. She e-mailed me a list with photos of the samples, and I couldn’t decide which ones I thought would look best on you, so I sent back an order for your size in all of them.” Her fingers rubbed over the sleeve of the dark purple shirt. “It’s so soft and light, I knew they’d be perfect for you. Anti-wrinkle, easy care, relaxed fit and well-tailored … all the good things.”

“Awesome. I’ve pretty much hated everything they’ve put us in for the promotional stuff we’ve been doing, so I’ll make sure to take at least a few of these with us for the album release. Maybe they’ll let me use my own clothes.” Leaning forward, he pressed a kiss to her forehead. “You’ve got good taste.”

“That’s what I’m hoping. There’s one more.” This box was small, but had some weight to it. “I was a little iffy about this one. If you’d rather have something different, I can trade it.”

The paper came away easily and he had to blink at the watch case for a moment, taking in the details of the shiny silver design. He focused on the logo and brought wide eyes up to find her biting her lip. “Jenny, this is a Rolex.”

“I know.” Her expression became hesitant. “When I saw it, I just knew it belonged to you, but then I started doubting myself as I was packing.”

“Jen, this one watch must’ve cost more than both our cars put together.”

“No, definitely not. I know I might’ve gone a little overboard, but you know how I am about finding a good deal …” She trailed off. “I found it at the same shop as J’s, and by the time I added in a watch for myself and Mom, then ordered the gifts for Lonnie’s guys, the owner was jumping at the chance to give me a bulk discount.” Clearing her throat, she looked at him. “Just try it on. Please?”

He carefully worked the watch out of its case and slid it over his hand, snapping the silver clasp into place. “Oh, wow.”

“It looks awesome on you.” A small smile formed as she watched him admiring his wrist. “Do you like it?”

“I love it.” Sliding across the bed, he tugged her into his lap and hugged her tightly. “It’s perfect.”

“Good.” She let out a sigh of relief as her arms went around his neck. “It’s already got your initials engraved on the back cover.”

“Really?” He laughed, kissing her cheek. “Thank you, Boof.”

“I’m not done yet, that was just the fancy stuff.” With a grin, she slid off him and went to unzip the backpack. “I didn’t think the rest required wrapping.” Pulling out a stack of discs and a thick manilla envelope, she set them on the dresser. “My last round of final arrangements and sheets for your binder. I’ve decided once I’m done at UCF, I’m going to invest in Brian’s studio. Maybe become a silent partner. Maggie let it slip that he’s keeping his agreement with the school just so he can keep up with the rent payments. Apparently, working with me is a bonus.”

“Of course it is. And that’s a great idea, Jen.” Picking up the top case, he flipped it over, reading the track list. “He’s done an awesome job putting together your mixes.”

“I know. He’s been a godsend. I’m just hoping he’ll let me return the favor.” Next came a handful of videos. “You said you were having a hard time finding movies in English, so I brought you a few new ones.”

“Oh, cool.” He smiled as he read over the titles. “I’ve wanted to see these. Awesome.”

“And I just finished reading The Green Mile last week. I thought you’d like to try it and a few others.” She passed the books to him, then met his eyes with a grin. “I added to your menu collection, too. We ate at the Hard Rock in Times Square while we were there, and I was able to sweet talk them out of one of theirs. It’s in your bedroom with the rest.”

“Nice. You may have to use your magic again, then.” His fingers flipped open one of the books to read the description on the jacket. “After we do some touristy stuff, we’re finally going to the one here tomorrow night. And I’m hoping we’ll get to the one in Berlin, since we’re supposed to have at least one full free day while we’re there.”

“All right. I’ll do my best.” Looking back into the bag, she bit her lip. “This last one is kind of silly.”

“It’s okay. Hit me with it.”

“Well, someone told me that the crowd throws stuff on stage when you’re performing and sometimes you’ll keep a stuffed animal for the bus or van. You’ve given me so many that it’s only fair if I give you one, since I haven’t been able to see one of your shows.” A fluffy teddy bear appeared, and she laughed as she tossed it to him. “Consider it a gift from your number one fan.”

“This one will stay right here.” He caught it against his chest, grinning as he let his fingers run through the soft fur. “I wouldn’t want anything to happen to him.” Leaning forward, he set the bear on top of the pillows. “And I want to get you a few while you’re here, too. One from Sweden and one from Germany. Maybe Berlin.”

“That’s sweet. Thanks, Josh.”

“It’s nothing compared to all this.” Standing up, he crossed to her and hugged her tightly, straightening so that her feet left the floor. “You’re the best, Boof. Thanks for everything.”

“You’re welcome.” Her arms wound around his neck as he lifted her higher against him, and she leaned forward to kiss his cheek. “You’re not so bad yourself.”

He’d just tilted his head, his lips meeting hers, when there was a knock at the door. “Hey, Jace?”

At Chris’ voice, he let out a quiet groan, broke the contact and let his forehead rest against hers. “Yeah? It’s open.”

“Hey.” The door opened slowly, and Chris peeked his head around cautiously, biting back a grin when he saw the pair in the middle of the room. “Sorry to interrupt, but Lonnie wants to talk to you before we leave.”

“Sure.” He set her down, kissing her one last time. “There’s a bathroom right across the hall if you need it. Just head on down whenever you’re ready, okay?”

“Yeah. Be there in a little bit.”

“Dude, did I miss Santa, or what?” Chris laughed as JC passed into the hallway, taking in the torn wrapping paper littering the bed and floor, his eyes settling on the sparkling silver watch. “Looks like you scored.”

“An elf paid me a special visit.” JC sent a wink to Jen before he turned and headed for the stairs.

“Speaking of elves …” She waved Chris into the room, pointing to the gifts still sitting on the bed. “Want to help me make some deliveries?”

----------------------------------------

Wednesday came quickly, and Jen found herself sitting in one of the black vans, tucked between JC and Justin, waiting patiently outside the airport for the okay that it was time to board their night flight to Stuttgart. The guys were chatting excitedly with Chris, their energy raising as they prepared to promote the album they’d put so much work into. Sara came out the sliding glass doors and headed for the other van, her hands full of documents, and JC’s hand squeezed hers, a smile lighting his face as he looked to her. “You ready?”

“Shouldn’t I be asking you that?” She laughed as his leg began to bounce. “How much coffee did you have today?”

“Not nearly enough.” He yawned, then shook his head. “I’ll be out before we take off.”

“Yeah, right.” Biting back another laugh, she glanced at her watch. “How long are we going to be in Stuttgart?”

“We don’t fly out for Hamburg until early Friday morning. We’ll check in to the hotel when we get there, then we have a few morning show interviews and a radio thing after lunch.” Cutting a glance toward her, his brow arched. “We have free time after we finish at the radio station. Wasn’t there a castle you wanted to see?”

“Really?” Her eyes brightened with her smile. “Can we go?”

“Sure.” He lifted her hand and pressed his lips across her knuckles. “As you wish, Boof.”

The side door of the van opened, and Sara stuck her head inside. “Okay guys, you know the drill. Security and talent first, Lonnie has your boarding passes and you’ll go around security and directly to the gate. All bags are already checked and ready to go, but make sure to keep your hands on your carry on. Everybody else goes with me to check in and we’ll go through airport security before boarding. Boarding time is in forty-five minutes, so let’s get a move on.”

JC leaned over, kissing Jen quickly before releasing her hand. “See you on board.”

“Yep.”

It seemed as if the van was suddenly empty as the guys and their ‘shadows’ hopped out, leaving Jen with Lynn and a few of Johnny’s crew. Lynn came around to sit next to her, grinning as she looked down at the backpack at Jen’s feet. “Planning on camping?”

“I hope not.” A laugh escaped as Jen’s fingers closed around one of the straps. “I have this nightmare that out of all the bags on board, mine will be the one to get lost. I’ve got a couple changes of clothes and all my irreplaceable things with me, just in case.”

“Smart girl.”

“All right, people. Let’s go. Have your ID and passport ready when you get to the counter.” Sara’s voice was tired as she began walking away from the vans, not waiting for anyone to catch up to her.

With a quick glance at each other, Jen and Lynn grabbed their bags and followed the large group into the airport, joining the bunch at the check in desk. Finally, Lynn had presented her ID and passport, and she was holding her boarding pass. As she picked up her bag, she sent a smile to Jen. “I’ll be waiting for you over in security.”

“Okay.” Jen nodded, smiling at the desk agent as she passed over her paperwork. “Hi.”

“Hello.” The agent typed quickly into her computer, frowned, then keyed in the information again. “Do you have a confirmation number?”

“I’m sorry.” Jen blinked in confusion. “A confirmation number?”

“From where you booked your flight. Did you jot down the confirmation?”

“I didn’t book this flight.” She shook her head. “I’m with the group that just came through.”

“I’m sorry, Miss, but your name isn’t on the flight manifest.”

“It’s not?” Jen glanced to where the group was waiting for their security check and found Sara staring back at her from the other side of the barriers, an odd expression on her face. A smirk lifted the blonde’s lips, just before she turned and quickly made her way toward the gate. A sinking feeling began in the pit of Jen’s stomach. “Let me guess … the flight is full, isn’t it?”

“There are no available seats, Miss.” The agent’s eyes darkened with sympathy. “I can check for a later flight, perhaps? Or maybe even on another airline?”

“I don’t really know what to do.” Leaning around, she caught a glimpse of Lynn, just arriving at the check point. “Am I allowed to go to the security area, as long as I don’t try to pass through? I need to let somebody know what’s going on.”

“Absolutely. Please stay on this side of the barricades.”

“Thank you.” Fighting back her panic, Jen scooped up her ID and passport from the counter and fairly ran toward where Lynn had just finished with the security agent and was picking up her bag. “Lynn! Hang on a second!”

Lynn turned, her brow furrowing when she saw that Jen wasn’t in the security check line. “Jenny, you’d better get a move on.”

“I didn’t get booked on the flight.”

“What?” The older woman’s eyes widened. “How did that happen?”

“Sara’s in charge, that’s how.” Jen sighed, running a hand through her hair. “I’m going to try to catch a later flight and meet up with you guys, but I really don’t know where I’m supposed to be going. Do you have a copy of the schedule?”

“Of course. Lonnie gave us a printout this morning.” Lynn began digging through her bag, sighing in relief when she found the packet of papers with their itinerary for the next two weeks. “Is there anything else I can do?”

“I’ve got my cell phone with me and an international plan. Does anybody on the team have a phone?”

“I really don’t think so. Here.” She tore a corner off the last page of the schedule. “What’s your number? If someone has a phone, we’ll stay in contact. Either way, someone will try to keep in touch whenever we’re able.” A spark of fire lit in Lynn’s eyes. “And I’ll make sure Jace knows what happened. We’ll be lucky if he doesn’t tear that plane apart.”

“Don’t let him do that. I’ll just …” Jen swallowed hard. “I’ll work something out. I’ve got my credit card with me, and the cost isn’t a problem. Surely I won’t be too far behind.”

“Okay, honey. I’ve got to go.” Lynn leaned across the barrier, hugging her tightly. “Be careful, okay?”

“I will. You’d better run. I think they just started boarding.” She watched Justin’s mother move quickly down the hall, holding back tears. “Forget about my bag getting lost. I just got lost.” Taking a deep breath, she straightened her shoulders and made her way back to the booking counter, managing a smile at the desk agent as she pulled her wallet from her pocket. “I think I need some help. What’s the quickest way for me to get to Stuttgart?”

*********************

JC glanced over as Sara dropped down into the seat beside him. Fighting back a groan, he forced a small smile. “Sorry, Sara. Jen’s with me.”

“Sure. Whatever.” Not budging, she leaned down to make sure her bag was pushed underneath the seat in front of her.

“Seriously …” He was interrupted by a crashing noise, his eyes jerking up to see a panicked Lynn racing up the aisle. “Lynn? What’s wrong?” His gaze moved behind her, his brow furrowing at the empty space. “Where’s Jenny?”

“She wasn’t booked on the flight.”

“She what?” Fear streaked through him, then a burning anger, his hands fisting as he faced Sara. “How did that happen, Sara?”

“Beats me. Guests are responsible for their own arrangements.” The blonde shrugged indifferently. “Guess she didn’t take care of business.”

“Guests are responsible … since when?” He began breathing heavily, earning a wide-eyed stare from Justin in the seat ahead of him. “My parents were here two months ago. Steve was with us on the last tour. Lynn and Diane are with us all the time. Since when are guests responsible for their own arrangements?”

“Family and crew are provided for.” Sara regarded him coolly. “Guests are on their own.”

“I spoke to Johnny about this when we were first working out the promotional tour. He specifically said everything would be handled and that she’d be with us the entire time. Besides, we didn’t even have a final schedule until this morning.” His voice rose as he argued, drawing Lonnie’s attention. “How the hell was she supposed to know where to go and when?”

“I’m sorry, but that’s not my problem.” Icy blue eyes warmed in sympathy, her tone softening. “I’m sure she’ll work it out.”

“Jace, she’s trying to get on a later flight to meet us.” Lynn interjected, her hand gripping the seat beside her. “But we have bigger issues. I know there’s a language barrier here, but did anybody actually look at their boarding pass? Or listen to the announcements?”

“What do you mean?” Lonnie joined her in the aisle. “Is something wrong?”

“We’re not going to Stuttgart. This flight is nonstop to Hamburg.”

“No.” Lonnie’s hand went to the sheaf of papers lying on his seat. “The schedule we have says Stuttgart, then Hamburg, then Berlin for the release. This was in stone as of this morning.” His dark gaze fell to the blonde who was sitting before him, completely unfazed. “What happened to our 'final' itinerary?”

“Changes were necessary with a few of the interviews. I sent out the finalized schedule this afternoon.”

“This afternoon? I’ve had all the security arrangements made since Monday, with assurances from both Johnny and you that there would be no changes! The hotel in Hamburg isn’t even expecting us until Friday.” The large guard looked about ready to breathe fire. “We can’t just wing a security detail as we go. Somebody’s bound to get hurt. Or lost.”

“Someone already has.” Lynn leaned against the seat as they ignored the flight attendant trying to get them to buckle in. “All I had was the schedule you gave me. Jen is back there trying to get on a flight to somewhere we aren’t even going, with nothing but her credit card and carry on. We can’t get in touch with her until we get to a payphone when we land, and even then, do we really know where she needs to go?”

“Damn.” Lonnie’s large hand fisted on the top of Sara’s seat, and he leaned down to get in her face. “I want an updated copy of that schedule. Now!” The girl’s hand shook slightly as she reached into her bag, pulling out a fresh packet of papers. “Thanks for nothing. Lynn, give me Jen’s number. I’ve got my phone with me and I’ll try to call her as soon as we land.”

“Oh, my God. There’s nowhere for her to go.” JC dropped his face down into his hands as he groaned. “She doesn’t have any cash, so she can’t get a cab. Even if she could get there, she couldn’t get back in the house. There’s no telling when a seat will be available, which doesn’t even matter, since she has no idea where to meet us. I’m supposed to be taking care of her, and I’m leaving her stranded in an airport in Sweden.”

“It’ll be okay.” Sara’s hand patted at his arm comfortingly. “I’m sure …”

“If you really think it’s a good idea to touch me right now, then you’re seriously one crazy bitch.” He seethed, his fingers clawing at her wrist before twisting it painfully, blazing eyes piercing her straight through. “If anything happens to her – if she’s not in perfect condition when I get to see her again – I will end you. We’re talking burned alive, not even ashes left, Sara. Do you understand me?” Flinging her arm back across her body, he took a deep breath. “Lonnie, get her away from me, or I’m gonna rip her to pieces.”

“Get up.”

“But this is my …” Her defensive voice cut through the tension in the cabin of the plane.

“Get. Up.” Lonnie reached down and gripped her arm, physically removing her from the seat as his other hand picked up her bag. “Lynn, you’re with Jace.” He watched as she dropped down into the seat and wrapped her arms around JC, then gestured toward the large man who had the seat next to his. “Tiny, you’re taking her seat. This one’s sticking with me.”