The One Nighter by BrandyRae
Part I:  Chapter 1

Cassidy Nickel was having, possibly, the worst day of her entire life. She had worked so hard to get to where she was. Now she had blown it in ten seconds flat. The network was never going to give her another shot on air. Never.

With a huff she waited for the hotel elevator to stop at her floor. Instead of drinking her sorrows away in the bar, which she’d definitely thought about, she decided to sweat them away in the gym instead.

Finally, as she heard the ding, she pushed her backpack up on her shoulder and stepped into the mirrored room, ready to run five miles if that’s what it took to rid her of her anxiety. Either that, or until she collapsed of exhaustion, whichever came first.

A suited man grinned cordially as he stood casually in the back corner. She didn’t return the gesture. She was too bitter. Instead she turned her back and waited to be transported to her destination.

From day one she’d been beat out by men. It was the complete story of her life, always being looked over and turned down because there was a man that was more suitable for the job.

Until, of course, she’d somehow managed to get her big break -– and then blow it! Unfortunately, that was no one’s fault but her own and for the first time there was no man to blame for her set back.

She wished there was. It would have made her screw up so much easier to deal with. Instead she only had herself to hold responsible, and that was making her feel like pure and utter shit.

It was also making her very bitter towards the opposite sex.

When the elevator dropped her off on the third floor, she didn’t look back at the man behind her. She stepped out and turned to the left, heading towards the exercise facility she’d used earlier in the day.

Only this time when she got there, something was different. Or, rather she say, someone was different. There hadn’t been a 300-plus pound man standing in front of the doorway last time. The look in his eye didn’t exactly sit well with her current mood.

“The gym’s closed,” his gruff voice spoke as he looked down at her with intimidating dark eyes and arms twice the size of her thighs. “Come back in an hour.”

Unfortunately, the scowl she shot back at him didn’t affect him in the slightest. “Really? That’s odd because I called the front desk ten minutes ago and was informed that the gym is always open to guests.” Both of her hands braced at her hips, as she stood up as tall as she could, stiffening her shoulders and trying her best to look intimidating.

There was no way in hell she was coming back in an hour. She would do whatever it took to get in that gym.

“Sorry. Right now it’s not.”

At that she only seemed to get even more aggravated. She folded her arms across her chest and huffed, her feet planted firmly to the ground. “I’m not leaving until you let me in that gym.”

“Look, miss, you’re not getting in there to see him so you might as well just leave and come back in an hour like I said.”

Cassidy didn’t know who the hell the “him” was that this man was referring to, but one thing she did know, no man was going to stand in her way -- again. “Excuse me? I am not coming back in an hour so some man can have the gym all to himself. I don’t care who you are. I don’t care who he is. I’m a guest at this hotel just like everyone else. Just because I’m a woman does not mean you can tell me when and where I can workout!” By the end of her words she was completely shouting, her nostrils were flaring, her eyes were bulging and her fists were clenching. This was not what she needed at the moment.

She braced herself, waiting for his comeback, when instead a quiet yet distinctly male voice sounded from behind him. “Dre, what’s going on out here?”

“Nothing, J. Go finish your workout.”

Cassidy couldn’t see his face, but she was feeling so irate, there was nothing more that she wanted then to give this “J” person a piece of her mind. “Who the hell do you think you are?” she roared. “I have every much as right to use this facility as you do. This is just ridiculous.” Then she started babbling, uncontrollably, and somewhat under her breath. “Men, I swear… They think they rule the world and their God’s freakin’ gift to Earth, which is just bullshit. Bullshit, bullshit, bullshit.”

Dre turned his back to her then, and as he did Cassidy got a glimpse of long legs and a very fit frame. But she was too worked up and angry to feel the attraction any other average female between the ages of 15 and 40 normally would have felt. Besides, he was a man -- the enemy, plain and simple.

When the husky Dre turned back around seconds later, he was shaking his head and staring down at her with an irritated look. “Go in,” he stated simply, finally moving to the side and letting her through the door.

She thought about voicing a thank you, but decided she was too annoyed to bother and headed straight for the treadmill instead, not even taking a moment to notice the man who was curiously eyeing her in the mirror across the small room.



Justin Timberlake had known instantly when he’d heard the shouting in the hall that it had absolutely nothing to do with his status. If the situation had been any different, he never would have stuck his head out the door. But plainly this girl was upset for other reasons. Any fan with half a brain knew that yelling at his bodyguard wasn’t going to get them what they wanted.

Clearly her motives did not involve him in the slightest.

In fact, as he watched her discreetly in the mirror from the weight bench he sat on, he realized she hadn’t even taken a second look at him. She hopped right on the treadmill, started a quick walk, and was now staring intently at the TV, which was showing the same thing as the TV he’d been watching before she’d caused such a ruckus -- the basketball game.

With a smirk he returned to his curls, focusing more on his biceps than the strange woman across the room.

It was a barely a minute later when her voice, still plagued with annoyance, caught his attention. “HELL-LO REF… where’s the foul? Jesus.” Her eyes focused unforgivingly at the television. Her pace had now quickened to a steady jog instead of a walk and the white t-shirt that had covered the top of her just seconds earlier had been discarded to reveal one very toned woman in a pair of form-fitting exercise pants and matching sports bra, with an ass that looked tight enough to bounce a quarter off of.

Justin forced his sight away before she caught him staring. For some reason the thought of her actually noticing him eyeball her was a little frightening. As curious as he was, he wasn’t that curious. She had some obvious issues after hearing her shout in the hallway.

For a good twenty minutes Justin continued on with his workout, occasionally peeking a curious glimpse of her. Mainly he was trying to catch her looking at him, but she never did. As arrogant as it was, he honestly couldn’t remember not having a woman pay attention to him in quite some time.

It was…weird--almost foreign to him, but intriguing nevertheless.

That was the only reason he could figure out in his head for moving over to the treadmill beside her. Normally he didn’t even bother with cardio. He burnt enough calories in his line of work. He didn’t need it. But some reason, that’s where he ended up.

He set his pace at a fairly quick jog and focused his attention at the same TV as her. It was a close game – the Lakers vs. the Supersonics. Personally he was a Laker fan, but more in general he was a basketball fan. He loved the sport.

Obviously so did she.

That’s when it donned on him. She had to be gay. Why else would she have been so bitter and so undistracted by him? He sighed to himself, feeling slightly better about his newfound assumption, and continued with his jog.

This only lasted a couple of unspoken moments when she reached for her water bottle that had been in the cup holder, but dropped it before she had the chance to remove the cap.

Lesbian or not, he was still a gentleman. So before she could stop her machine, he’d paused his own and reached down between the two to grab the plastic Dasani bottle.

When he returned it to her cup holder for her, instead of receiving a thank you, he got the look of death. He couldn’t take it anymore. He had to say something to her. He had to know why she was so angry.

So he grabbed his towel and wiped the sweat off his brow. “Can I ask what happened to you to make you so bitter?” As soon as her eyes focused on him he wanted to take back his words. She had this remarkable way of making him feel about two inches tall for absolutely no reason whatsoever.



Cassidy was well aware of who the man next to her was. And to be completely honest, once she’d realized the man that had taken over the gym had been Justin Timberlake, she’d grown even more irritated. Mainly because she knew he’d been offered to do some correspondence work for the NBA when he had absolutely no sports background at all. Why? Because he’s a male superstar.

She had been working her entire life for just a little piece of that and he had been offered it for no reason at all except for the fact that he was Justin Timberlake. How was that fair?

And if he’d expected her to coo and gawk over him he’d been sadly mistaken. Nope, not happening.

“I’m not bitter.” She hit the stop button on her machine and grabbed her towel. “I’ve just had a very bad day.” Then she reached for her water and put it to her lips.

“Did your girlfriend turn straight and dump you, or what?”

She was so flabbergasted by his remark that the gulp of water she’d just poured into her mouth came spraying right back out -- all over him.

Oops.

Normally she would have felt bad, but after hearing his remark she felt absolutely no remorse whatsoever. “I’m not gay.”

He didn’t look up at her. Instead he wiped his face and tore his sweaty, and now wet, t-shirt over his head. She had to admit, he definitely wasn’t hard on the eyes. He was a little thinner than the men she was normally attracted to, but he definitely had nice muscle definition.

With his soiled shirt dangling in one hand and the towel around the back of his neck, he stared at her with darkened gray eyes that were clouded with a mix of both annoyance and confusion.

Good. She was glad that she wasn’t the only one that was annoyed. His confusion brought on some satisfaction as well, mainly because she knew she’d put it there.

“So if you’re not gay, then why do you hate men so much?”

She didn’t hate men. The fact was she loved men. She just hated that in her field she had to work ten times harder than any guy to get one tenth as far. And after the day she’d had, the feeling was quite intensified. “I don’t hate men,” she found herself explaining. “I work in a very male-dominated field where this afternoon I blew my one big shot. Men are not my favorite people right now.”

“So it was a man’s fault that you blew your one big shot?”

Automatically her eyes rolled. He would ask that. “Unfortunately no, that was all me…” She turned away, focusing her attention on the game. The score was close, the Lakers only had a two-point lead and there was just over a minute left of the game. She tried to stay neutral, but she’d never been much of a Laker fan. She was rooting for Seattle.

Her hope for the underdog was squashed quickly when Shaq hit a two-pointer and got the foul. He was going to the line. Things looked bleak for Seattle.

Audibly she groaned.

“Sonics fan?” Obviously he didn’t share her pain.

Her head tilted just enough to the side to catch a glimpse of his cocky stance, his arms crossed over his chest as his hip rested against the hand-bar on the front of the treadmill. His track pants were hanging a little low on his waist and she could clearly see the band of his white, name brand briefs.

Cassidy brought her sight up quickly before he noticed she’d looked. He was obviously arrogant enough as it was. She had no intentions of bolstering his self-absorbance.

He smirked as Shaq sunk the free throw. “You can’t fight it, you know, they’re the best team in the NBA right now.”

“That’s a matter of opinion,” she spouted off, not daring to look his direction this time.

He chuckled quietly, obviously amused by her. She was beginning to wonder if he would ever leave her alone. “So what is this male dominated field that you’re in?”

She gave in and turned his direction, not able to watch the game anymore anyway since it obviously wasn’t going to end in her favor. “Sports media.”

His head nodded up and then down very slowly just one time. “So what’d ya do to screw up so badly?”

She wanted to ask him why he was so curious, but instead she found herself answering him. “I had my first shot on air today and I completely choked.”

“The camera can be pretty intimidating, especially your first time in front of it.” She’d expected him to laugh or make some condescending remark. She’d never thought he’d actually try to make her feel better. “Don’t worry. You’ll get another shot. You seem pretty determined.” It was at that moment he uncrossed his arms and stuck out his hand. “Justin Timberlake,” he introduced himself.

She accepted the gesture, still slightly taken aback by his words of encouragement. “Cassidy Nickel.”

He grinned and as his hand slipped away from hers both sets of eyes focused on the TV as the final seconds ticked away and the game ended – Lakers 89, Sonics 83.

“Well,” she reached down and grabbed her backpack. “I’m done jogging myself to death.” Slinging her bag over her shoulder, she grabbed her water and her towel and stepped off the machine.

“Yeah, I think I’m about done too. Nice meeting you.”

Now a few steps away, she turned back and for the first time let him see her smile. “You too.” She’d made it almost to the door when she stopped and turned back. He was bent over by his own bag, half way into a clean t-shirt. “Hey, uh, Justin?”

His head popped through the neck of his shirt and craned her direction as his arms appeared out of the sleeves.

“I just wanted to say thanks… for, uh, saying what you said. It helped.”

With a smile he nodded his head. “No problem. Not all men are the scum of the Earth.” She realized he was teasing and for the first time felt somewhat smitten by him. He really was charming when he wanted to be.

“Yeah, well, thanks.” She waved quickly and headed out the door as fast as she could.

© BrandyRae 2004

The One Nighter by BrandyRae
Part I:  Chapter 2

“That was an interesting little episode,” Dre remarked as he rode up with Justin in the elevator.

“Yeah… she actually wasn’t so bad though. I talked to her for a few minutes. Besides, she had one of the best asses I’ve ever seen.” And he’d seen his fair share. That was for sure.

Dre just shook his head. “Man, you just don’t stop.”

“What? I’m serious, D. It was like –- ” His hands squeezed the empty air as if he were squeezing her -- “Nice.”

“Well, too bad you’ll never ever see her again,” the much bigger man remarked. But Justin wasn’t so sure. He had other ideas. For some reason Cassidy Nickel had sparked his interest.

“You think? She is staying here. I could just call her up and see if she wants to hang out tonight.”

“You ARE crazy.” Dre shook his head again. “This is not some random fan that adores you. This is an angry man-hating woman. There’s a difference, J. A big difference.”

The elevator stopped, the doors sliding open. Dre stepped out first and nodded his head for Justin to follow, as the coast was clear. “You’re not challenging me? Are ya, D?”

“No. I’m telling you to leave it alone,” Dre barked back.

But Justin was stubborn and when he wanted something, or someone, there wasn’t much that could stop him.



Cassidy had just got out of the shower and slipped into a comfortable pair of shorts and a t-shirt. She’d made the mistake of returning a call to her boss when she’d got back up to her room. It hadn’t gone so well. Now she was afraid that she hadn’t only lost her chance on air, but that she’d lost her job as well.

Of course it was her own fault. She had a bit of a temper, and she had the tendency to raise her voice whenever that temper got out of control. Prime example of that fact made earlier outside the gym.

It was a quality of hers that she didn’t exactly like. In fact, she wasn’t sure where it had come from. Her mother and father were both very reserved. It wasn’t like she was the product of a verbally abusive household. Actually, it was quite the opposite. She had the absolute perfect, storybook, black and white sitcom, Ozzie and Harriet, Leave It To Beaver family.

So, knowing all that, why exactly did she scream at her boss over the phone?

She had no clue. But she was pretty positive that come Monday she’d be looking for a new job, and possibly anger management classes.

Pulling her thick brown hair back into a single ponytail, she was just about to grab her cell phone and call someone to vent to when there was a knock on her room door.

She’d contemplated ordering room service, but it had only been a thought so she knew that wasn’t it. Curiously she strode across the small room and peeked out the door.

When she realized who the person was, she was completely surprised and almost slammed the door shut again.

--Almost.

Why the hell was Justin Timberlake knocking at her door, holding a brown paper bag in one arm?

She gave him a funny look, becoming very aware of the fact that she was wearing a pair of pretty short shorts and a rather thin white t-shirt with no bra. Automatically she crossed her arms over her chest to shield the view, still not letting the door open completely, her foot keeping it in place. “Um, what are you doing here?”

He reached in the bag and pulled out a six-pack of Corona. “I thought you might want some company after the day you had.”

Had she secretly sent him some sort of non-verbal invitation earlier in the gym? She didn’t think so. She didn’t remember flirting with him or even giving him the slightest inkling that she was interested. Well, except for that split second when she’d sized him up, but that was far from an invite to her room!

Even so, the cold beer did sound kind of tempting and she actually wouldn’t mind having some company. Of course the other more rational part of her brain reminded her that he was a complete stranger and if it weren’t for the fact that his face was so obviously recognizable she wouldn’t even consider letting him into her room.

“Let me just, uh… hold on a sec.” She shut the door in his face before he could speak a word and slipped on a bra underneath her shirt. Then she opened the door and let him inside.



Justin stepped inside her small room, disappointed that she’d managed to put on a bra. He’d caught a quick glimpse of firm breasts with very perky nipples. The last thing he wanted was for her to cover them up.

But she had, just another showing of how different she was from most of the girls he had encounters with. She would be so much more of a challenge.

He needed a challenge. He was ready for a challenge.

Moving across the room, he set the beer on the table and took a seat in one of the only two chairs. He almost forgot what the average hotel room looked like, being that he hadn’t stayed in one in quite a long time. It was small and it didn’t even have a refrigerator, just that one table, a TV, and a bed. But he knew asking her back to his room was definitely out of the question.

She moved across the room after him, tan legs and bare feet strutting across the neutral colored carpet. Plopping down in the chair opposite from him, she reached an arm out over the tabletop. “Well?” she said, waiting.

He figured she wanted a beer so he pulled one out of its cardboard slot and picked up the bottle opener he’d thankfully thought to bring along with it. Popping off the cap, he slid the drink over to her.

Dark brown eyes peered at him from the tops of her lids. “No lime?”

Damn, he’d forgot those. “If you want I can get some.”

She shook her head no. “It’s not necessary.” Then she put the bottle to her lips and took a healthy swig, his eyes following the action attentively. The more he stared at her, the more he wanted her.

Breaking his stare, he grabbed a bottle for himself, opened it and took a drink.

“So, is this something you do often? Bring beer to strange women in hotels?”

He smirked and shook his head no. “I’ve had insomnia for the past couple of days and my best friend isn’t here to keep me occupied.” It was sort of the truth, sort of not. Trace wasn’t with him and he had been having a difficult time sleeping, but even if that weren’t the case he still would have found his way to her hotel room.

The look she gave made him wonder if she bought it. Both of her hands gripped lightly against her beer bottle as her arms rested against the round table. “So you know why I’m here. Why are you here?”

He thought he’d just explained that. He wasn’t sure what to say so he just kind of looked at her funny.

“Here… in Atlanta.”

“Oh, I’m working on a track for a friend.” A track for a friend. Did she know what that meant? He decided to elaborate. “I’ve been in the recording studio.”

Nodding, she took another sip of her beer. There was only a third of it left.

When the conversation seemed to get stuck after that, he realized he had to think of something to say and quick or else his attempt at whatever it was he was attempting was going to die and fast. “So, did your day get any better after you left the gym?”

Her eyes rounded as she looked away momentarily. “Unfortunately, no. I think I’ll be looking for a new job on Monday.”

“Because of one screw up?”

She shook her head no. “I sort of got a little…” she drew in a deep breath, “irate with my boss over the phone.”

He visibly frowned. “Oh. That’s not good.”

“Yeah,” she agreed and then added, “oh well, he was a prick anyway.”

For some reason that caused him to smirk. “One of those evil men you hate so much?”

Noticeably her eyes rolled. She had very distinctive eyes. Even when she was giving dirty looks they were completely captivating. “I don’t hate men. I hate that they don’t have to work as hard, in my particular industry, to get ahead.”

“Can I say something without you biting my head off?”

She didn’t answer. Instead she just stared with those intense brown eyes of hers, waiting.

“It was your choice to go into that field. You could have pursued a career that was a little more female driven, like sewing or nursing or something…”

The fact that she looked about ready to smack him was quite entertaining to him. He laughed out loud and reached for her hand that was hovering in the air.

“I was just kidding. Don’t hit me.”

Gruffly she pulled her arm away. “I wasn’t going to hit you.”

“Has anyone ever told you that you need to lighten up a little?” Her demeanor was way too stiff. He was guessing she never just let go and relaxed. Justin knew the perfect way to help her relax and he was beginning to feel like it was just what she needed. Of course he didn’t feel like they had reached that stage just yet. With a proposition like that, he probably would get decked!

She smirked and leaned back into her chair. “Yes,” she answered simply. Then she grabbed another beer and held out her hand for the bottle opener. He gave it to her.

As he watched her open her second Corona and take a swig, he realized this was a woman with probably no girlfriends, who’d always been “just one of the guys,” even though most of those guys more than likely were trying to figure out a way to fuck her, because she was definitely that hot. Besides, there was something about her shitty attitude that made her that much more fuckable. She wasn’t the sugary sweet he was used to. She seemed much more callused.

He was assuming she was single. One, he doubted she’d have invited him in if there had been a boyfriend back where ever it was she called home. And two, she was way too uptight and too career orientated to be involved with someone.

From what he was guessing, she’d either been burned very badly in the past, or she had absolutely no past as far as relationships were concerned. Of course that didn’t mean she was a virgin, because she was way too brazen for that. He was guessing she’d had at least a handful of partners. She’d just never been able to commit.

Not that he was looking for commitment. That was about the last damn thing he was looking for. Been there, done that.

Finishing off his first beer, he grabbed a second for himself. “So tell me why you love sports so much.”

“Tell me why you love music so much.”

Her inquisition caught him off guard. He wasn’t expecting her to throw that at him. “Uh, it’s kind of hard to explain. Music is just a part of me that’s always been there.”

She smirked, tilted her head to the side and tipped her bottle at him. “There’s your answer.”

“But I’m a huge sports fan too,” he found himself explaining, as if he needed to justify that to her. “Basketball is my first love, then probably golf, football…”

She nodded. “My dad’s a retired football coach. Sports were always on in my house. And if we weren’t watching them, we were playing them.”

“So did you grow up with a lot of brothers?”

She shook her head no. “I’m an only child.”

And there it was--a conversation in the making. Bingo.



An hour later the six-pack was gone and Cassidy found herself enjoying the company of Justin Timberlake very much. Actually, they had quite a bit in common, and now, as they discussed the “greatest basketball player ever”, Michael Jordan, she found herself feeling more and more attracted to him.

She had the distinct feeling his intentions went beyond “just talking” and frankly she was feeling rather “okay” with that. She just hadn’t figured out how to let him know it.

Truthfully, after the day she’d had, a little physical intimacy would do her some good. One-night stands weren’t something she engaged in often but she’d be lying if she said she hadn’t participated in a select few.

A one-nighter with Justin wouldn’t be such a bad notch in her belt, not that she had any girlfriends to share it with, but that didn’t make it any less victorious.

She’d made up her mind. If he made the move, she’d accept it.

When a break hit in the conversation, she excused herself to use the restroom. Those three beers had finally hit her bladder full force.

A couple of minutes later when she stepped out, she was surprised to find him standing right outside the door. “Do you mind?” he asked, pointing inside.

She shook her head no and watched as he stepped inside and shut the door.

For some reason, she didn’t sit back down. She walked over to the table, picked up the trash that sat atop of it and threw it all into the garbage. By the time she finished, he emerged from the bathroom.

“You’re cleaning up. You want me to go?”

Cassidy turned around to face him only to realize he’d been standing right behind her, which made him now right in front of her. Justin was only about four or five inches taller than her as she stood a good five foot nine. Normally her height seemed to intimidate most men. It didn’t seem that way with him, as she looked him straight in the eye, his confidence not faltering in the slightest. “You think you’ll be able to sleep?” she asked, not sure exactly where she was heading with it.

He shook his head no. The scruffy dark blond hair along his jaw was much more apparent at this close proximity. It wasn’t the only thing she was just now noticing. He also had a nice scent about him -- aftershave or cologne or something. It was clean, but not very strong. It was nice. She liked it. “You?” he asked.

She shrugged. The only reason she wouldn’t be able to sleep if he left is because she was hoping that he’d stay, at least for a little while. She felt like she needed to give him a sign, but she didn’t want to be too obvious -- too easy.

So she shifted her weight from one foot to the other and looked away briefly, gently biting down on her bottom lip. “You want me to stay?” he finally asked, his voice soft and whispery. She learned instantly it was a voice she liked very much.

Her eyes shifted until they found him. Instead of saying yes, she stared with welcoming eyes, hoping he’d get the hint without her having to say anything.

His head fell forward a notch, his forehead almost making contact with hers but stopping before it touched. “You want me to kiss you?” He asked even quieter this time, the faint smell of beer escaping from his lips.

She knew she didn’t need to speak her answer. Her body language alone was enough to tell him what he wanted to hear. So rather than voice the words, she inched just a bit closer to him assuming he’d figure the rest out on his own.

And she was absolutely right, as his lips, more soft and smooth than she’d ever imagined, pressed into her. His kiss was damn good and it didn’t take but a second for her hands to find their way to his strong and sculpted shoulders. The more she thought about it, the more she realized this was exactly what her day needed.

His hands slipped around her waist, drawing her near as she found herself completely pressed against him. Was there one single part of this man that didn’t feel good? She was beginning to think not as she tilted her head and let him deepen their already passionate kiss.

Yep, this was exactly what she needed. The feeling was so apparent, next thing she knew, she was telling him so. “I need this so bad,” she voiced breathily between deep and hungry kisses.

His lips curled, smiling against her as he spoke a somewhat arrogant, “I know.”

But instead of his arrogance pissing her off, it only seemed to turn her on even more and next thing she knew they were heading straight for the bed.

When they landed, she was on top, straddling his lean frame and preying over him like a cat. His face held this unabashed grin as he smoothed his hands to her sides, finding the skin beneath her flimsy shirt. She didn’t deny him when he made the move to pull it off her. Instead she obliged willingly and let him toss it to the floor.

Then she made her attack, her lips seeking his out repeatedly as one of his hands smoothed up her side and the other found its way to the back of her thigh. She couldn’t help but moan when his grip slipped up her shorts and found the flesh of her rear. Her eyes curled back into her head it felt so damn good. Luckily her eyes were closed and there was no way for him to see it, but at this point she didn’t figure it mattered too much anyway as all inhibitions had already been thrown out the window.

She kissed him so hard and so deep she almost thought she’d swallow him right up, but it was obvious he liked it as the hand that had been at her side found it’s way to the back of her head, keeping her locked against him.

Another noise escaped her, a muffled groan, as her insides were so wound up and so on fire, already she couldn’t wait to feel everything that he had to offer. In fact, it was then that she let her weight fall on top of him, the uncontrollable urge to grind against him not being held back as she was discovering quickly that what he did have to offer was not going to disappoint her in the slightest.

His fingers pulled at the ponytail holder in her hair, slightly dampened locks falling down her cheeks until both of his hands pressed into her scalp, pushing it away.

Seconds later he successfully flipped them over, their positions switching as he obviously wanted to be the aggressor. She stared up at him with hungry eyes, hoping to convey that she was willing to do whatever it was he wanted her to do.

She had never felt so desperate for sex in her life. It was almost liberating it felt so damn good.

Instantly she reached for his shirt. She pushed the pesky cotton up to his armpits until he took over and yanked it off the rest of the way. His arms bulged with muscles she would have never guessed he had from just glancing at him in passing.

He let all of his weight rest on one arm as he used the other to grab one of her legs and bend her knee against him. His head fell forward until his forehead was pressed up against hers. “You’re fucking hot,” he complimented in a husky voice.

Flattery would get him everywhere. She smiled wide in response. “You spit a good game,” she shot back playfully, seductively.

At that, he smiled as well. He pressed one moist kiss to her lips and then drew back enough to look her in the eye. “You knew exactly what I wanted when I stepped through the door, didn’t you?”

She grinned guiltily, but didn’t answer.

His eyes traveled down the length of her before his lips kissed her once more, thoroughly. “So if you knew,” he asked with weighted breath, parting just enough to speak, “why’d you bother with the bra?”

Her words didn’t quite make it out as his wet lips and the scrape of his teeth pressed into the side of her neck. He stopped before making a mark, but that didn’t stop her from letting out another uncontrollable moan in his honor.

“Well?” he whispered against her ear, letting his lips barely brush against her.

“You had to work for it. I wasn’t about to be that easy,” she finally managed, her head tilting back and her eyes closing as he placed moist kisses down the front of her neck.

“Who said anything about being easy?” he asked, placing a kiss to the hollow of her throat. “We’re just two people satisfying a need.” He skipped down to her breast, his breath soaking through her bra and warming her skin as his mouth circled her, his teeth tugging gently at the hardened flesh that was just asking to be freed.

She was practically gasping for air by the time his fingers found the front clasp and succeeded in undoing it. He pushed one side of the material away and replaced it with his hand, his fingers twisting and kneading until she was so hard that it hurt. Then he looked up at her with a smile on his face before smoothing his tongue across her as if he were making it all better.

Pushing her palms into the mattress, she lifted her shoulders off the bed and he pulled away, a slight look of confusion across his features. She grinned invitingly and backed up towards the head of the bed, finding the three pillows that lined it. He crawled towards her on his hands and knees, but stopped when she rose up and slipped her bra off the rest of the way.

On his knees he met up with her, wrapping both his arms around the bare portion of her flesh. “What do you want?” he asked, his lips pressed up against her ear.

Slipping a hand to the back of his neck, she reveled in the feel of him as she kissed him deeply. She let her other hand glide down his bare chest and then down his stomach, between them, until ultimately feeling exactly what it was that she wanted. “This,” she answered surely, pressing her palm against him, enjoying the hard, thick feel of him even if it wasn’t actual skin to skin contact.

At that he was the one that groaned and it gave her more satisfaction then she could have ever imagined. This was going to be the one-night stand to top them all. She couldn’t wait for it!

© BrandyRae 2004

The One Nighter by BrandyRae
Part I:  Chapter 3

Justin was on fire for this girl. She was not the typical “I love you so much I’d do anything to be with you” lay. It seemed, rather, that she had the exact same agenda as he did--purely animalistic, lust-filled sex.

That excited him more than he expected. And now, as her full lips slipped down the center of his torso, placing moist kisses all over his bare skin, he was having a hard time keeping himself upright. His legs felt a little weak; which he hoped was an affect from his workout and not from her.

It didn’t matter. He would never stop the game they’d started. And he was now convinced that it was a game, one she’d played just as well as he had.

Her teeth scraped against his hip bone and he forced back a grunt, his breath stopping short in his chest as he bit down on his bottom lip. Next thing he knew her hands were pushing down his pants, briefs and all. He maneuvered his legs to kick them completely off, returning to his knees before her, watching as her eyes studied every part of him.

He started to reach for her last piece of clothing, her tiny black shorts, but he didn’t accomplish the task as she closed the distance between him and ran a hand down his arm.

That arm fell from his wrist to his side and then around to his butt, while her lips hovered just a breath away from his own. “You’re body is nicer than I expected,” she breathed into him.

He wasn’t sure if he was supposed to take that as a compliment or not. It definitely wasn’t the kind of compliment he was used to. “Am I supposed to say thanks?” he asked instead.

She smirked, and brushed her lips over his seductively.

Compliment or not, he suddenly didn’t care.

“You look skinnier with clothes on,” she explained. “Remember, I’m used to being around athletes all the time.”

He shook his head slightly and tried to forget that she was basically telling him he wasn’t as attractive as the guys she was used to seeing. “You know what…” he didn’t finish; instead he yanked her shorts down her slim hips in a completely unforgiving fashion. She didn’t seem to mind, as she fell back against the bed and allowed him to pull them off the rest of the way.

He leaned over her, letting her feel his hardened state against the lower portion of her belly.

“You don’t like that, do you?” she asked with a devilish smirk. “You’re used to girls telling you how gorgeous you are all the time.”

She was right, but he didn’t tell her that. He opted for a more non-verbal answer, a very hard kiss to her lips.

When he pulled away, she giggled, and for some reason he suddenly felt as if she was the one that had played him, instead of the opposite. He closed his eyes and shook his head just a notch, set on taking back control of the situation.

She giggled again.

Damn it.

“What?” he asked, sure that he’d probably regret it in a minute.

Her hand smoothed up his neck, her fingers creeping into his short hair. “Don’t worry,” she voiced, looking him straight in the eye. “You are gorgeous. No argument there.”

She was messing with his confidence and he wasn’t sure why that was. He didn’t think she meant to, but the fact was, he was used to being worshiped practically. She definitely wasn’t doing any worshiping.

He reminded himself that this was the challenge. This was what he’d wanted. And instead of wasting anymore time talking he started a journey with his lips from her chest down to her stomach.

That shut her up. Well, at least her words anyway. She definitely wasn’t being quiet, as tiny gasps and peeps escaped her voice every time he seemed to make contact. That was more like it -- definitely more like it.

He let his hand slip between her thighs and the fact that she was dripping wet for him made him want to bury his face right into her. He kissed her low, just at the spot where her hip turned into thigh, and he knew the second he gave into her and tasted her sweet spot, she’d be putty in his hands. That’s what he wanted. That’s when his mission would be accomplished.

He pushed that surefire sexy grin he’d mastered so well onto his lips and looked up at her with hungry eyes. She was intoxicated by him, aching for him, practically begging for him.

His confidence was back at an all time high. Nothing could stop him now.

He pressed a moist kiss just above her neatly groomed hairline and smiled with satisfaction when he felt her shiver. That’s when he made his move, pushing her legs open and bringing his mouth to the place he knew would make her scream and moan.



Cassidy cursed out loud at the feel of his tongue against her most sacred area. One thing for sure, he definitely knew what he was doing. She was glad for that because the last thing she wanted was to spend her evening with a man who couldn’t satisfy her. That was the main purpose for what they were doing and that was the only goal she had in mind.

She didn’t want to try and get to know him better. She didn’t want to pretend that it was more than anything but a one-night stand. She just wanted to let off some steam and feel the release.

And with the way he was working it, release didn’t seem so out of reach.

Her fingers dug into the bedspread, her eyes rolled back into her head, as he continued to suck and lick and nibble in all the right places. Damn, she could let him do this for hours, all night, in fact.

The tension of her day didn’t seem to be weighing on her shoulders anymore. She could give a damn about her job now.

Gently his teeth pulled at her sensitive flesh, his tongue soothing the spot right after. Then he stopped; just when she could feel that sweet release so, so close.

The smirk on his face was somewhat evil as he rose up to meet her face to face, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand. She reached down and grabbed him intimately, firmly, and watched the surprise in his eyes at her boldness. She was enjoying how much she was obviously not the norm for him. It didn’t take a rocket scientist to figure out that he’d had his fair share of one-night stands, but she didn’t care. This had nothing to do with him and everything to do with herself.

He was just an object and she had no problems admitting that.

She stroked him, maybe a little too hard because for a split second she thought she saw pain in his eyes even though he never brought it to her attention. But still she figured it was only fair that she kissed it and made it feel better.

With her hand on the side of his waist, she pushed him off of her and over to the mattress. “Stay right there,” she told him as she hopped off the bed and reached into the closet to grab the necessary precautions for what was to come next out of her purse.

She came back with more than one in her hand and dropped them on the nightstand. Then she maneuvered her body over his legs and gripped him once again, rubbing her thumb over the tip and wiping away the moisture that had surfaced there.

Then she did exactly what she knew he wanted her to, bringing her head down and taking as much of him as she could into her mouth. He shifted slightly underneath her, his breath deepening instantly as he cursed silently under his breath.

His reaction only made her want to continue that much more. It was the power the act gave her that she enjoyed, not so much the act itself. She sucked him hard, and his legs twitched underneath her, as if he were wishing for more control. But she didn’t give it to him. Instead she kept on going, waiting until he was so, so close.

And then she did the same thing he had. She stopped.

He looked about ready to cry as she climbed up his body, leaning into him and letting him feel how hot she was for him. He grabbed onto her hips and guided her up the length of his shaft. The contact made her breath stop as she closed her eyes for just a second, reveling in the sensation that danced through her body.

She didn’t waste another second. Reaching over to the nightstand she grabbed one of the wrapped condoms and ripped it open. Then she took the liberty of sheathing him completely before finally lowering herself to meet him.

The fit was rather snug, a fact she was more than pleased with, as she slowly worked her way down, letting her body adjust to him. His hands found her hips again as he was finally buried inside of her. The look on his face was pure animal lust as he murmured something about “that’s it, ride it…” and she found herself doing just that.

It wasn’t long before she was finally on the verge of what she’d been waiting for, panting wild breaths and whispering his name silently under his breath. She cried out when it hit, not able to control herself, her head lashing back and her teeth digging into her bottom lip.


Justin almost enjoyed watching her just as much as he enjoyed the act itself. She really was a beautiful woman -- long brown hair cascaded down to her shoulders with creamy skin that was toned from head to toe, breasts that fit perfectly in the palm of his hand, story-telling brown eyes and full, supple lips that felt just as good as they looked.

His climax was close, but not quite there. He hated condoms. They cut back some of the sensation and nothing felt as good as skin to skin contact, but protection was a necessity in cases like this.

Finally, as he felt her walls shuddering around him, squeezing him and hugging him, her voice a mere whimper of satisfaction, it hit -- a full fledged orgasm, big and climactic, as he literally felt like he was being drained of everything he’d held inside. His body shook underneath her, his breath heavy as he groaned and grunted and cursed out loud.

Damn, that had been more intense then he’d expected.

She rolled off of him, letting him lie there alone -- still breathing, still reeling in his surge of sexual overflow. She seemed unaffected. Satisfied, but unaffected. He wasn’t used to not having an affect on the girls he slept with.

He turned onto his side to face her. “Do you feel better?” he asked, almost afraid of her answer.

She grinned and he felt immediate relief. “You have no idea.”

“I’m starving. You wanna order room service?”

© BrandyRae 2004

The One Nighter by BrandyRae
Part I:  Chapter 4

Cassidy wasn’t sure if she wanted to share a meal with him. Really, she’d got what she wanted and technically she was done with him. Although, she wasn’t really tired and the thought of a second go was definitely tempting.

Climbing off the bed, she slipped back into her shorts and her t-shirt, this time without the bra, and then plopped back down, her back to him.

“Are you kicking me out?” she heard him ask.

She looked over her shoulder, watching as he slipped his pants up his narrow hips. That’s also when she caught sight of the tattoo between his shoulder blades. She’d failed to notice it earlier. Of course, she hadn’t really studied the back of him. “I thought you were hungry?” she said.

“I am. Aren’t you?”

She was. “I could eat. What do you want?”

He walked around the bed, slipping his plain white shirt over his head. “Personally, I’m like a cheeseburger/french fry kind of guy.”

“I think I’ve burned enough calories for today. That sounds good.” She scooted over towards the phone and picked up the receiver.

“If you need to we can burn more calories after we eat.” She looked over after hearing his words; phone to her ear as it rang and rang, catching the sly smirk on his lips. But she didn’t give him any inclination as to her thoughts on the matter. She liked being a little more complicated than that.

Things were a bit awkward between the time she ordered the food and the time it arrived. It wasn’t exactly surprising. Two complete strangers had just had sex and now they were trying to spend time together alone like they actually knew each other when they didn’t.

She had half a mind to tell him how there was no need to pretend that things were more than they were for her sake, but she didn’t. Instead she participated in the small talk until finally their food arrived.

That’s when they both returned to the table, only this time with food in front of them. She poured some ketchup on her plate and dipped a fry. “So I know you said you don’t usually do this sort of thing, but you were lying, right?”

He looked at her kind of funny, his hamburger mid-way to his mouth. She’d expected him to take his bite first and then answer, but he did just the opposite. “It’s not the first time,” he answered simply. “What about you?”

She shook her head around, sort of between a yes and a no. Admitting that she’d had other one-nighters could make her sound cheap and easy, but by that point she figured it was too late anyway. There was no need to lie. Besides, she didn’t want him to think what had happened had anything to do with who he was. If he thought he was the only one, he might. “There’s been a few.”

He finished chewing and set his burger back on his plate, picking up his can of Coke and taking a big gulp. “You’re not a relationship kind of girl, are you?”

She wondered how he gathered that, especially since it was right on the mark. It wasn’t that she had anything against relationships she just didn’t have time for one. “I’m too focused on my career right now.”

He nodded, this time shoving a fry in his mouth. He really must have been hungry because he’d gobbled down almost double what she’d eaten. “Same here. Besides, I just get burned in relationships anyway.”

“Oh, you mean the whole Britney thing?”

This time he did the semi yes/no head nod thing. She got the feeling it wasn’t a subject he liked to talk about. “That, and others. You don’t want to hear about all that stuff, trust me.” Even if she did, she knew he wouldn’t tell her. She didn’t have to know him well to realize there were some things he planned on keeping private, and rightfully so. She understood. She didn’t exactly want to tell him about her burned relationships either.

“Sorry, I probably shouldn’t have brought that up,” she remarked, finally taking a bite of her plain cheeseburger.

“It’s alright. I’m used to it.” He ate another fry. “So, where you from anyway?”

“Originally? Arizona. Now I live in L.A.”

“How old are you?”

She didn’t mind his questions. Maybe she should have, but she didn’t. She had nothing to hide. “I’m 28. How old are you?”

He looked at her like he’d figured she already knew, but just because she knew who he was didn’t mean she knew every detail about him. She didn’t have time to keep up with all that celebrity bullshit. “Twenty-two.”

Her head nodded just once as she took another bite of her burger.

“You don’t know that much about me, do you?” he asked after a quiet second, wiping his mouth with his napkin. “Have you even heard any of my music?”

She smirked. “Of course I have. I don’t live under a rock.”

“Do you like it?”

“Yeah… I like the one where you’re in the room with all the little lights.”

“Rock Your Body.”

“Yeah, that one.”

He shook his head lightly back and forth, as if he didn’t know how to make out what she was saying. It was obvious he was used to most women just falling at his feet. Cassidy had never been the type to fall at any man’s feet, superstar or not. She’d been around plenty of superstar athletes with their superstar egos and superstar requests. She was sure superstar musicians weren’t any different.




Justin didn’t know what to make of this girl. She was so not what he’d expected. She was so not what he was used to. Of course, he reminded himself, that was the attraction and the challenge in the first place, but still he just didn’t know how to handle it. It was different, which was refreshing, but at the same time, it was weird. She sort of made him feel like she was way out of his league, like he was fifteen again crushing on some older woman he could never have. But that wasn’t the case anymore. He’d had older women. Older women loved him!

He wasn’t even sure why he cared because after tonight he’d never see her again. But for some reason the whole thing was just mind boggling to him.

“So are you ever going to tell me exactly how you blew your big break?” He decided it was a good time to change the subject. “Did you say something bad on air?”

Her head fell. “Worse,” she told him. “I didn’t say anything at all. I just opened my mouth and nothing came out.”

“Why do I find that hard to believe?” he asked. “You don’t seem shy to me at all.” She definitely hadn’t been shy when it came to fucking.

“I’m not. I don’t know what the hell happened. I just couldn’t talk all the sudden. It was awful. They had to cut to someone else.”

“Damn.” He felt for her. He really did. He knew how hard it was talking into a camera. He remembered the first time he had to sing to one without any type of an audience. That was really weird.

“Oh well. No use crying over spilt milk. I’m sure something else will come along. It always does.”

At least she had a fairly good attitude about it, better than she’d had earlier. Hopefully what he’d done for her had helped with that.

“I’m definitely not looking forward to showing my face, though. Unlike you, the majority of men that I’m surrounded by everyday will give me major shit for this. Even my own dad is probably going to give me an earful.”

“Is he hard on you?”

“Yeah, he’s a little tough, but I’m used to it.”

He sensed that he’d managed to bring back the stress of her day, and that was the last thing he’d meant to happen. So he decided to stand up and move around the table. Her intriguing eyes followed him the entire way as he maneuvered himself behind her and brought both of his hands to her shoulders, where he began rubbing her tensed muscles. For some reason he just felt set on making her feel better.

Her head limply fell forward as he worked his fingers up her neck. “That feels so good,” she spoke through a low moan.

“You’re pretty tense. When’s the last time you had a massage?”

“Try never.”

“Never? Like never, ever?” It was such a routine thing for him. He guessed maybe that wasn’t normal.

“Not professionally.”

“Damn girl, you need to let me hook you up with my masseuse.”

She let out a quiet laugh and it donned on him that most people didn’t have their own personal masseuse, but, with all the strain he put on his body, regular massages were a necessity.

Leaning down close to her ear, he continued to rub her neck and shoulders while whispering against her. “I’m serious.”

“I’m sure you are,” she smirked.

“I know you’re thinking spoiled celebrity, but just because I’m not a pro football or basketball player doesn’t mean I don’t work hard in my line of work. Dancing every night on stage can take a lot out of you.”

She craned her head to look back at him over her shoulder and he paused the movement of his hands. “I wasn’t trying to put you down,” she spoke softly. “Swear.”

He nodded, even though she was already looking the other way. “You wanna move this over to the bed?”

Instead of answering, she stood up. He took that as a yes. She lied down on her stomach, resting her cheek into one of the pillows and relaxing each of her arms at her sides. He climbed over her to get in the right position, continuing with his mission of relieving some of her tension.

For a moment the room was completely silent and he could feel her body relaxing underneath him. He wasn’t exactly sure why he felt so set on pleasing this woman. Normally he didn’t go to such an extent when he had these types of encounters. In fact, normally their time together would already have been over. But for some reason he wasn’t quite ready for his time with her to end.

“Your hands work wonders,” she finally muttered, breaking the long stint of silence. Inside her words made him smile. Her compliments seemed to mean a lot more than the ones he was used to hearing. Maybe because he noticed she didn’t give them out too often.

“Thanks,” he told her. “Anything to make your day end on a high note.”

“Are you always this willing to please?” she asked, just as he slipped his hands underneath her shirt.

“Here, let’s take this off,” he prompted. She lifted up and he maneuvered it over her head. His hands smoothed down her bare back as he thought to answer. “Um, am I always this willing to please? I don’t know really. I never really thought about it.”

From her voice came the smallest peep of a noise, a release of air accompanied by a tiny moan, as he molded his hands into her flesh. He couldn’t even begin to describe how much her noises turned him on. It only urged him to continue as he kneaded his fingers lower, down the sides of her spine. For a woman, she had quite a bit of muscle definition in her back. It wasn’t overly so, it was just right. He enjoyed the sight of her and by no means had any problems indulging in what he saw. “Well, you’re doing a fine job,” she said breathily.

He smirked softly to himself, glad to have the confidence booster after she’d chipped away at it earlier. His hands smoothed down to the small of her back where he reveled in the feel of her silky skin, admiring the view of her tanned flesh as he slipped his touch to her sides. She squirmed slightly from the contact and he realized that his touch had tickled her. “You’re ticklish?” he asked.

The answer she gave was a no, but he didn’t believe it. Either way, his mood wasn’t exactly playful at the moment so he decided not to push it. Instead he removed his hands from her back and pushed her long chestnut hair to the side, leaning down and placing a moist kiss to the back of her neck.

She responded with an “mmm” sound, which only pulled at his desire even more. He tasted her once more, his mouth brushing against the warm flesh just below her hairline. A moment later her body was shifting underneath him, her arms curling around him as their lips joined together once again. The warmth of her bare skin against his chest, clothed or not, made him ache with a desperate desire. All he could think about was how much he wanted her -- again.

Long, graceful fingers found their way to his stomach, inching up underneath his t-shirt. Her touch was delicate and sensual. His breath seemed to stop short at the feel of her.

He realized she wanted better access to him and lifted up enough so she could remove his cotton tee. Then she pressed into him, the warmth of her bare breasts against him causing a groan to be stifled in his throat.

She felt really good against him, and he was beginning to think that this would be the one-night-stand to go down in the record books. Maybe after this one he’d quit, because he was starting to feel like he’d never have another that could quite compare. Especially as her lips slipped down his neck, her hands discovering his flesh with urgency.

His eyes closed as her touch smoothed down his back and underneath the waist of his pants, finding bare flesh that she gripped firmly. He couldn’t help but grind into her, pressing his hardened desire against her body, not holding back in the slightest as her mouth once again found his, their kiss hungry and intense.

Her hand flattened against his chest as she pushed him down flat on his back. Then she was reaching for his pants, jerking them off his legs as his eyes studied her with fascination. Next she was pulling down the bedding as he instinctively maneuvered his naked body inside the sheets, where she eventually joined him, her skin just as bare.

She straddled him, not letting their bodies meet, as she leaned in towards his face with a wicked grin across her lips. “Not yet,” she whispered.

His sight roamed down her body and then back up again, where their eyes finally locked. “I’m not in a hurry,” he told her.

“Good.”

“Why? Did you have something specific planned?” he asked with a curious smirk.

She leaned even closer to him; her face nestled close to his cheek. Her lips brushed across his earlobe as she finally spoke. “Besides fucking the shit out of you? No, not really.”

For some reason her dirty words made his whole body quiver, a ball of excitement welling up in his chest. “Damn girl,” he breathed in sharp as her teeth dug into the top of his shoulder and her hand found its way in between their bodies, slipping down and curling against his arousal. She seemed to know how to touch him just right as her hand worked against him, her lips steadily making the journey down his chest. Her teeth tugged at his nipple and a quick pinch of pain shot through him. He almost found himself whimpering in reaction, but instead he was grunting and twitching and trying hard not to embarrass himself because of the crazy affect she seemed to have on him.

He realized where her lips were heading and a part of him didn’t want to fight it, but the other part of him recognized the fact that she was on her way to taking him to a place he might never come back from. He didn’t want this woman to leave such a mark on him, one that he might never forget. So he did the only thing he could think to do. He used his strength and took over, flipping her onto her back.

Deep brown eyes twinkled up at him as he was now hovering above her. She had this amused smirk on her full and pouty lips, one he was ready to just kiss right off her. But her words came before he had a chance to make it that far. “Couldn’t handle it, huh?”

He didn’t mean to show the aggravation on his face, but the look he gave her undoubtedly did. He shook his head. “You’re fucking crazy if you think that.”

She didn’t believe him. It was obvious.

“It’s okay,” she told him, whispering loudly. “I won’t tell anyone how I rocked your world in just one night.”

He couldn’t stand it anymore. Had he finally met someone that was even more arrogant than he was? Damn it. What gave her that right to talk to him that way? He had to shut her up and he did it the only way he knew how, letting his mouth crash against hers in a hard and forceful kiss. But the woman only seemed to feed off his brashness, as seconds later she was shoving a condom wrapper at his chest.

It was a constant battle between his mind and his body. In his head he hated the affect she had on him, but his body screamed something completely different. And just like that he found himself giving in to her, ripping open the wrapper and slipping the thing on. Seconds later he was slamming into her, not holding back in the least bit. Suddenly, he realized, he was the one that wanted to fuck her so hard that she’d still feel it the next morning.

But it seemed being too forceful was just impossible with her. It was obvious he wasn’t hurting her, as she moaned and cried out in ways he’d never even heard before, ways that made his desire wind up even tighter and stronger. She thrived off his energy, off his motivation to please both himself and her. He liked that. It seemed with her there were absolutely no limits and that was something he’d never exactly experienced before.

It wasn’t a five-minute fuck. Or even a ten or fifteen minute fuck. Every time he thought she was there, she seemed to make it last even longer. For him, it was going to be huge. He could feel how strong the build-up was and the release that was meant to follow would be even bigger.

When it got to the point that his legs were beginning to shake, his body weakening, he found himself practically begging for her to come with him, as pleading, breathy words fell from his lips. And that’s when he finally felt it, her entire body clenching. Her walls tightened to such an affect he swore he felt it all the way in the tips of his toes as his whole body quaked in response.

He had absolutely no control over the things he said. In fact, once it was over chances were he wouldn't even remember them, as his mind had been completely somewhere else. His body, and its struggle for satisfaction, clearly in charge at that moment in time.

The release was so intense that his whole world seemed to go completely blank, his surroundings out of focus, his actions made without thought.

Sweat beaded at his brow, his body spitting out everything it had to offer, he finally collapsed, falling off to the side of her, reminding himself to breath, as that seemed to be a difficult task in itself.

He turned to her then, to tell her how absolutely amazing it had been, to admit that she had completely rocked his world in just one night, but he realized instead that she’d already turned her back to him. She’d covered herself with the sheet, rolled onto her side, and, if he wasn’t mistaken, she was already halfway asleep. He was so stunned that he just lied there, stiff as a board and shocked into a stupor.

This woman had just made Justin Timberlake her bitch…

© BrandyRae 2004

Cassidy honestly hadn’t meant to fall asleep so quickly and effortlessly.  When she woke sometime in the wee hours of the morning, she almost hadn’t remembered what had happened.  Until she realized she was naked, and not only that, but a little bit sore to boot.  That’s when memories of the evening had come rushing back.

Of course she realized he wasn’t there any longer.  Not that she had expected him to be, but she felt a little bad at the fact that she hadn’t even told him thank you.

She got up to use the bathroom and when she returned she noticed what was sitting on her nightstand--two twenty-dollar bills.  Anger immediately surged through her at the notion of him paying her for the things they’d done.  She certainly wasn’t a prostitute!  Then even more anger hit as the thought came to mind that he’d only thought she was worth forty dollars! 

“What an asshole!” she cursed to herself, pushing the money off the table and onto the floor out of complete and total frustration.  That’s when she noticed the piece of paper that had fell with it. 

She was almost too angry to pick it up and read it, but her curiosity got the best of her.  The dim light from the lamp that had been left on, for who knew how long, was enough for her to read his scribbled words.  She realized instantly they weren’t exactly kind words.

Sorry I bored you to sleep.  Here’s $40 for the hamburgers.  Justin

For some reason his obvious bitterness made her giggle.  She hadn’t meant to offend him, and if he had stayed, which – again – she had never expected him to, she would have explained that to him.  But it was too late now.  She had no way to contact him and she had no plans to try.

Cassidy was sure the next girl he slept with would more than sooth whatever wounds she’d given him by not inflating his ego to an even bigger state than it had been before.

With all that in mind, she curled back into bed against her stiff hotel pillow, having no problems drifting back to sleep.  Regardless if he was angry with her or not, she didn’t care.  What he’d done for her had more than helped to ease the stress of her day.  That was all that mattered.

Justin was in a foul mood when he got up the next morning.  Never had a woman EVER fallen asleep on him like that.  He hated to say it, but his ego and his confidence had definitely taken a bit of damage from his night with the angry, wannabe sportscaster.

Angry was definitely the best word to describe her and it seemed the only way he could make himself feel any better was to keep reminding himself of that.  It hadn’t been anything he’d done.  It was all her.  She was mad at the world.  He didn’t need those types of people around him.  He needed positive, happy people around him. 

Cassidy Nickel certainly hadn’t been positive or happy.  That was for damn sure!

But she had been a great lay, and that was one thing that kept creeping back into his mind even though he absolutely didn’t want it to.  In fact, the image of the sex they’d shared seemed to play inside of his head over and over again like looped videotape.  Every time he closed his eyes he not only saw her, he felt her.  Cassidy had felt great. 

He hated it, but it was the truth.  Her memory was branded into him and he just couldn’t shake it.  That was the main reason why he felt so irritated as he rode down in the elevator with his security, on his way out of the hotel.  He was furious at himself for actually wishing he had just a little more time with her.  Just one more time to satisfy the hunger she seemed to cause.  That was all he wanted.  Nothing more.

It pissed him off how badly he still wanted her.  It pissed him off that he had this terrible ache to feel her one more time.  Damn her.  She wasn’t supposed to have an affect on him.  She was only supposed to be a one night stand.  One night stands aren’t supposed to leave you wanting more the next day.  They’re supposed to leave you satisfied.

Letting out a loud breath he followed his bodyguard out of the elevator.  “Rough night?” the hefty man chuckled.

But Justin was far from amused.  “Don’t even go there.”

That only caused a bigger laugh from the man.  But the act didn’t garner a response, especially as Justin noticed her at the check out counter.  Fuck.  This was not what he wanted.  Part of him wanted to march right up to her, but the other part of him didn’t want to give her the satisfaction.

Fuck, fuck, fuck.

“Dammit.  There she is.”

“Still hot for her?” Dre asked. 

“She was a good lay.  That’s it,” Justin answered firmly, doing everything possible to not look over at her.

“Well, guess what?  That good lay is headed right for you.”

“Fuck,” he cursed again under his breath.  He turned then, catching sight of the scowl on her face as she was just a few feet away.  He tried to conjure up a smile, but it fell quickly as she shoved the two twenty dollar bills he’d left for her into his chest.  That had made her mad.  Good.

“I don’t want your money you fuckin’ asshole.”

The part that sucked was her anger toward him only intensified the urge to throw into the nearest empty room and fuck her senseless.  Damn this woman!  “You fell asleep on me, you bitch.”

Dre laughed quietly under his breath and Justin wished immediately that he wouldn’t have announced that in front of his bodyguard.  He was never going to hear the end of it.  “I didn’t do it on purpose,” she said through gritted teeth.

“Look, I can’t do this with you right here.”  He grabbed onto her wrist—firmly.  “Come with me.”  He had a feeling she wanted to fight him, but she didn’t.  He kept hold of her until they made it safely into the back seat of the limousine that was waiting for him out front.  Dre took a seat in the front seat with the driver—instinctively—and the two of them were completely alone.  The privacy window up.

“What the fuck do you think you’re doing? Kidnapping me?  Just ‘cause you’re some superstar doesn’t mean you can just have your way with me.”

He groaned inwardly at the mention of such a thing.

“Where the fuck is my luggage?”

“Relax,” he told her.  “The driver is putting it in the trunk.  And I am not trying to kidnap you.  Jesus.  Are you headed to the airport, or what?”

“That was the idea,” she remarked stiffly, hands crossed over her chest as she was perched on the long seat opposite from him, staring out the window across with her legs kicked out, one ankle on top of the other.  He was sitting in the very back, staring at nothing but her and definitely making it known.  Finally she turned her head to look at him.  “What?”

“You’re the angriest woman I’ve ever fucking met.”  And she made him hotter than he’d ever fucking been, but he didn’t tell her that.

“You left me forty dollars and a note.  Pretty insulting,” she remarked gruffly.

“You fell asleep!  Very insulting.”  He shot back.

“I have a tendency to do that after really good sex,” she stated stiffly, refusing to look him in the eye.

He wanted to grin with accomplishment, but he didn’t want to spoil the chance he felt like he had for another go round.  “So what’s up?  You want more?”  

Cassidy wasn’t sure what to say.  She hadn’t meant to even talk to him, but she’d left check out and he’d been right there, just a few steps away.  Her feet had just started moving before she could even think about it.  The two bills he’d left her mysteriously making their own way out of her purse and into her hand.  Damn him.  Why’d he have to be so fucking arrogant and cocky?  It turned her on completely and she had a good feeling she wouldn’t be able to say no to him.  A fact he was probably more than aware of.  “What do you think?” she finally answered, still trying to hold up the front that she was angry.

“I think this is about to be the best fucking limo ride ever.”  He fell to his knees and moved towards her.  Unlocking her legs and pushing them open so he could kneel in front of her.  Her hands went straight for his head, pushing the hat off his short but untamed hair and letting the thing fall to the floor.  The car started to move, but Justin’s balance didn’t falter.

“I hate you.”  Her words said one thing, but her actions another as she was running both her hands over his head and down the back of his neck.

His grin was cocky and wide.  “I know.”  He took a dive straight for her neck, biting a little too hard on her tender flesh.  She whimpered and he immediately kissed it and made it better.  He rose up, his lips meeting her ear.  “Too bad I’m the best fuck you’ve ever had,” he whispered confidently before nibbling on the sensitive spot where jaw met neck.

He heart was pounding inside her chest.  He was right and she hated that fact.  She hated that she was so hot and so wet for him at that moment that she didn’t even care that they were in the back of a limo with a driver and a bodyguard up front who no doubt knew exactly what was going on in the back.  She hated it, but it excited her too.  So much that she found herself reaching for the fly of his jeans.  “Just shut up and fuck me,” she finally said.

He groaned with appreciation and unzipped the light sweatshirt she was wearing.  He grinned when he realized she wasn’t wearing anything underneath except for a lacey black bra.  “God damn,” he muttered under his breath just before sucking at the cleavage that was exposed.  Her eyes closed instinctively, her head falling backwards.  She lost hold of his waist as she was too caught up in all the wonderful things he was doing to her with his mouth at the moment.  She breathed in heavy breaths as his tongue slithered down the center of her stomach, his lips pressing moist kisses to her flesh. 

His hands pulled at the waist of her jeans, unbuttoning and then unzipping.  He groaned even louder upon the realization that her panties matched her bra.  Dark, lust-filled eyes stared up at her as he gave the undergarment a little tug with his teeth.  “Lift up,” he said, patting her hip.

She did, sliding right out of the expensive pair of denim.  “You too,” she told him.

He shook his head.  “Not yet.”  And with that his face disappeared as he pulled the lace to the side and buried his mouth into her.  She cried out, not giving a damn who heard.  She wanted him so bad.  She couldn’t wait another second.  “Justin, I swear to god, if you don’t fuck me right now—”

He grinned up at her, kissing her thigh and then her hip before slipping her out of her panties.  Then he pulled down his own pants, exposing the fact that he was rock hard for her.  Instinctively she leaned forward and reached for him, grabbing him rather aggressively.  He felt good in her hand, there was no denying it.

“Hey, hey, hey,” he said, “I know you’re excited, but not so hard.”

She smiled.  “You feel pretty fucking hard.”

Next thing she knew he’d pushed her back against the seat and had entered her without any hesitation, not letting her adjust to him in the slightest.  She remembered instantly that she was still sore, but she could care less.  Especially as he was already slamming into her, on the verge of pushing her over the edge in a mere couple of seconds.

Suddenly she found herself gasping for air.  She gripped at the t-shirt he was still wearing, pushing it up his chest and flattening her palms against him.  “Slow down,” she begged practically.

He did, leaning his face into her ear.  “Is this better?” he whispered as his rhythm switched to long, slow, thorough strokes.

“I just want to enjoy it for a little bit longer,” she panted, as her arousal wound and tightened inside of her.  His mouth pressed into the side of her face, an evident grin playing at his lips.  He liked what she’d said.  He made it known.

His thrusts continued, her hands slipped around his back, underneath his shirt as she kept it pushed up and out of the way.  His lips sought her out, kissing her thoroughly.  She felt his breath quickening and she new release was imminent.  “You are so fucking tight,” he muttered as he pulled his lips away from hers. 

“That’s because you’re so fucking big.”  She gasped as he slammed into her hard.  She was right there, so close.  Her breath stopped as everything tightened.  Then it hit, a rush of ecstasy. Huffing and moaning, her legs clenched around his as her whole body quaked with an overwhelming release.

He cursed and groaned and she knew he was right there with her.  She pushed her hips to meet him—feeling every inch of him, every part of him, as her walls squeezed everything he had.  That’s when she felt his climax--felt it pour into her.  She watched his face—his teeth digging into his bottom lip and his eyes almost rolling back into his head.  He pulled back slowly and then returned, holding himself with her, pushing so that every sensitive part of their bodies touched.  “Fuck,” he whispered again, a smile curling to his lips.  He kissed her softly, sweetly.

Her heart was beating to fast to say anything.

“Don’t tell anyone, but I seriously think sex with you is the best I’ve ever had.”  

Justin knew he shouldn’t have told her that, but the words had slipped out before he’d even realized it. 

“You probably say that to all the girls,” she grinned coyly.  “Hey, do you think you can grab some napkins or something?”

He looked over his shoulder at the bar and grabbed the paper napkins out of the wine glasses, all the while trying not to come apart from her and make an even bigger mess.  He handed them to her and kept a couple for himself as he finally pulled out.

“You realize we didn’t use a condom?”

“I got a little caught up in the moment,” he grimaced.  “You’re on the pill right?”

She nodded her head yes.  “You’re clean right?”

His held tilted, a look of annoyance on his face.  “Very.”

“Good ‘cause I’m suing your ass if it turns out otherwise.”

His look turned even dirtier.  “That was a pretty shitty thing to say.”

“Well, living is important to me.  Sorry.”

He shook his head as he finally pulled up his pants, tossing her her underwear as she’d finished cleaning herself up a bit.  “That was very irresponsible.  Okay?  I’m sorry.  I don’t usually let that sort of thing happen.”  Usually he would have just settled for a blow job in the back of the limo, but that wasn’t what he’d been after at all.

Fact of the matter was, he wanted her.

He retreated back to his seat as she finished getting dressed.  “Were almost there.”

She nodded.  “Yeah.”

“If I give you my number will you call me?”

“Do you usually give your number out in this type of situation?”

Situations didn’t usually turn out quite like this one, but he couldn’t bring himself to tell her that.  So instead he just shook his head no and said, “Not really.”

She shrugged then and told him, “I might call.”

He hated that she played so hard to get.  He hated that he already wanted to see her again and she hadn’t even left yet.  He hated that she had got under his skin so badly.  But she had and he couldn’t help it.  “Well, can I get your number?”

“So I can be your new booty call?” she asked.

His brow furrowed as he shot her another nasty look.  “You’re so cynical.  You know that?”

Simply she nodded her head yes.

Then he grinned and scratched the back of his head.  “You would be a damn fine booty call, though.”  He was teasing, but he wasn’t sure if she’d catch it or not.  Although, honestly, he doubted that she cared one way or the other.

“Can’t argue that one,” she stated matter-of-factly.

He just shook his head as the car stopped.  “We’re here.”

“Yep.”

He pulled out his wallet and handed her a business card.  “Call me.  Seriously.”

She took it, but didn’t offer up her own.  There was a knock on the window and Justin reached for the door handle, opening it a crack.  Dre pulled it open the rest of the way. 

“This is the front,” he told her.  “I have to go in a different entrance.”

Cassidy nodded and rose to her feet, hunched over because of the lack of head space.  She looked over at Dre, but stopped in front of Justin anyway, apparently not giving a damn if he was watching.  She got right in his face.  “I’m gonna sleep really good during the flight home.  Thanks,” she told him softly and pressed one last kiss to his lips.

He wanted to say something about her calling him one more time as she climbed out, but he didn’t because Dre was going to give him a hard enough time as it was.

He watched her step out and not even turn back around.  Next thing he knew the door was shut and she was gone.  

Cassidy’s heart was still racing as she headed through the terminal.  She wondered if she had sex written all over her.  He’d said she was the best sex he’d ever had and as much as she hated to admit it, she felt the same way. 

But even so, she didn’t think she’d call.  Fact was, she’d lied to him about being on the pill.  She hadn’t been on any kind of birth control in a good four months and that fact scared her quite a bit. 

But what were the chances?  One time?  Come on.  That was just ridiculous.  Besides, if the unthinkable did happen she’d take care of it and he’d never have to know.  End of story.  That was it.

No, she thought, as she boarded the plane a little while later.  No way she would call.  The sex had been great and he wasn’t so bad either.  But there was no way in hell she had time to get her heart broken by some egocentric pop star.  No way at all.

© BrandyRae 2005

Five Years Later

Justin Timberlake sat two rows back from courtside.  His mom sat to his right.  His best friend Trace sat to his left.  The Lakers were playing the Supersonics.  It was the beginning of the season and the game really didn’t mean a whole lot in the scheme of things.  The Lakers weren’t quite the team they’d been a few years back, but he still loved basketball and after the past couple of months he’d needed something to occupy his mind.

He’d been through one of the roughest break-ups ever.  If you could call it that.  Technically it wasn’t just a break-up.  It was a divorce.  Unfortunately the marriage had only lasted six months, but that was beside the point.  He'd failed and he couldn't shake the pain of it.  This basketball game was the first time he’d set foot out of the house in weeks.  Every time he tried he was hounded by the press, hounded by the ruthless paparazzi. 

His lengthy relationship with one of Hollywood’s hottest starlets had been well publicized.  The separation had been even worse.  He was tired of thinking about it, but everywhere he turned it was right in his face.

He was twenty-seven years old, his career was still fairly strong.  He had a few hit movies under his belt, not to mention several hit records, both solo and with *NSYNC.   His career had never truly faltered.  But his personal life was in shambles.

He was absolutely miserable.

He’d talked her into marriage, but he couldn’t talk her out of divorce.  He wanted kids--a family.  She didn’t.  

Six months.  It had failed in six short months.

They’d dated for much longer, but the marriage had only lasted for six fucking months. 

He was miserable.

Instantly he shook out of his rut as Trace knocked a knee into his leg.  “You wanna beer?” the man asked.

“Yeah.  Mom?”

“I’ll take a bottle water, thanks.” 

Trace nodded and stood up.  Justin decided to stand up too.  “You know what?  I’ll go with you.”

“You sure?”

“Yeah.” 

The area they were in was fairly secure.  He wasn’t too worried about being mobbed or anything considering the price he'd paid, and anyone else in the area, had paid for their seats.  So pretending that he wasn’t nearly as depressed as he truly was, he followed Trace to one of the more private snack bar areas. 

He’d only made it two steps in line when he saw her.  He wasn’t even sure how he knew for sure it was her, but he did.  He knew instantly.

Cassidy Nickel had never called him.  They’d had one amazing night together and one incredible limo ride.   Still, to this day, he had not met a woman who could turn him out quite like she had.  The thought of all they'd done almost made his depression fade--almost.

He’d tried to get in touch with her after he’d returned home.  He tried all of his contacts, but nothing ever came through.  It was almost like she dropped off the face of the Earth for a good year and a half.   Then all the sudden there she was, on his TV--ESPN to be exact.  He’d been attached by then, with the woman who would eventually become his wife and then his ex.  But even still, he sat staring at the TV in awe once he saw her.  She was doing just fine in front of the camera, brilliant actually.  And he realized instantly that he had never forgotten about her.

Loosely he followed her career.  She ended up marrying one of the top quarterbacks in the NFL.  Funny, it wasn’t too long after he’d heard about her engagement that he asked his own girlfriend to marry him.

He’d never put those two facts together until that moment.

Now here she was, standing about three feet in front of him, looking just as good as she did five years ago--a time that was so memorable it had sparked him to write a number one song about it.  He wondered if she had any idea that the song was about their night.  He figured she must have.  He’d made it obvious on purpose.  He’d hoped after the song that she’d call, but she never did.

“Mommy!” Justin watched the little boy run, his arms stretched out, a head full of blond curls bouncing jubilantly as the boy trotted straight for her.  It was as if he’d been sucker punched right in the chest.   The wind just escaped right out of him.

He felt Trace elbowing him, but still he didn’t move.   It was almost as if he wasn’t even part of his own body, like he was watching from a spectator’s point of view.

It was silly to think.  It was his mind playing tricks on him.  But the boy looked just like him. 

Trace smirked and Justin was suddenly a part of reality once again.  “Funny,” his long-time friend remarked.  “That kid totally reminds me of you when we were little.”  Justin’s mouth went dry.  He must’ve been as white as a ghost.  “You okay, man?  You don’t look so hot.”

He didn’t answer.  Instead his feet were moving and before he even realized what he was doing he was kneeling down, eye to eye with a miniature version of himself, looking into gray-blue eyes that exactly mimicked his own.  “Hey, little man,” Justin grinned.  “You a big basketball fan?”

The boy nodded, looking mildly confused, but smiling nevertheless.  It was a Timberlake grin.  There was no mistaking it.  Justin put a hand to his chest, as if it would stop the sudden ache he felt in his heart.

He was overcome with emotion.  He wasn’t sure how he knew, but he was positive that this was his son.  In the deepest part of his soul he felt the connection.  He looked into this little boys eyes and it was as if he were looking at himself twenty-three years earlier.  It was--amazing.

“Justin,” her voice was soft, whispery soft.  It only confirmed what he already knew.  He swore he heard five years of pent up guilt.  It all made such perfect sense now.  She’d disappeared to have his baby.  She’d never called because she didn’t want him to know.   She’d did it all on her own.

He’d had a son for more than four years and he’d had no fucking idea.

He didn’t know how he was supposed to feel.  He didn’t know what to say or to do, but he realized quickly that Trace was marching up behind him.  Rising to his feet he pushed a tight smile to his lips and said a calm, “Hi.”

“You, um.  This is my son, Cody.”  She patted the top of the boys head, ruffling his curls as she forced out a smile.

“He’s beautiful.”  His voice came out calm and serene, but inside he felt like a tornado was ripping through his body--a tornado of hurt and confusion.  He realized that they didn’t know each other very well, but how could she not have told him?  Then again, what would he have said five years ago if she had?

“He’s yours.”  Her words were so quiet he barely heard them.  He wasn’t expecting her to admit it so openly.  He wasn’t expecting her to just drop it on him like that, even if she was simply confirming what he’d already known in his heart to be true.

“I know,” he whispered, trying not to choke up like he wanted to.  His heart was pounding and he felt as if his chest were ready to explode, but still he somehow managed to keep his calm.

“J, do I need to get security?”  Trace had obviously heard what she said and was undoubtedly thinking it was some crazy woman claiming she had his child.  It wouldn’t be the first time.  But this was different.  This was for real.

He turned to his oldest and closest friend and shook his head no.  “No need for that. Trace, this is Cassidy Nickel.”

She stuck out her hand.  “It’s Nickel-Brown now,” she corrected, and then added, “Sort of.”

Cassidy had played the scenario in her mind hundreds of times, but never had she expected it would go down quite like this.  She’d expected something bigger, some kind of blow up or--a temper, she guessed.  But not this.   He was completely calm, and accepting.

He’d known before she’d even told him.  How could he have known just like that?  Cody did look just like him.  She’d done her research.  It wasn’t a difficult task to find baby pictures of Justin Timberlake online.  And when she’d birthed a child that looked absolutely nothing like her, obviously she was curious.

Justin’s friend stuck out his hand at her, mouthing her name quietly to himself as if it sparked something in his mind but he wasn’t quite sure.   “Cassidy Nickel,” he stated it quietly.  “Oh, shit.”  Obviously he was aware of the very short time she and Justin had shared.

But Cassidy was more concerned with her child’s ears just a couple of feet down from them.  Cody was holding on to her hand tightly, absorbing everything.

Luckily Trace realized instantly and corrected himself.  “Shoot, I mean.”  He grimaced for just a quick moment.  Then he looked over at Justin.  “That Night?”

She wasn’t sure what the reference meant, but Justin obviously knew exactly as he nodded with confirmation.  Cassidy just squinted with confusion.  This whole scene was very awkward.  What was she supposed to say to him now?

But her attention was drawn behind him, to the woman that was marching straight for them.  It was his mother.   She knew instantly, kind of like he’d known instantly that Cody was his son.  “I was starting to get worried.”  She spoke in a thick southern drawl as she laid a hand on her son’s shoulder from behind.  He turned his head gently.

“Sorry.  Everything’s fine.”  His eyes returned back to Cassidy.  “This is Cassidy Nickel-Brown and her son Cody.”

The middle-aged woman grinned with mild confusion as she stuck out a hand and said, “Nice to meet you.”  Cassidy could only hope that Justin’s mother wasn’t as perceptive as he was.  But why on Earth would she think that Cody was her grandson?  Surely she had no knowledge of what had happened between them.  Who would tell their mom all that!  “What a gorgeous little boy, you have there.  Now I understand the hold up.  I’m sure my son just couldn’t help himself when he saw that little cutie.”

Thank God.  If she thought anything, she wasn’t showing it.  “Mom,” Justin spoke quietly, warningly, as if the woman had already said too much.  Then he eyed his friend as if he was telling him a million things without saying a word.

The shorter man touched the blonde’s arm.  “Hey mom,” he called her and Cassidy realized in an instant how close they all were.  “Let’s go get those drinks,” he suggested to her.

“You sure you’re okay?” The woman asked her son.

Justin nodded.  “I’ll be there in a minute,” he assured.

The two left and suddenly Mommy, Daddy and child were all standing together for the very first time in Cody’s life.  The boy didn’t know it, of course, but it was still a rather strange feeling for Cassidy.  Her heart was racing at the realization.

“Obviously we need to talk and this is not the place,” Justin said after a quiet moment.

“Justin, I don’t expect anything from you.”  She didn’t know what else to say, but she didn’t want him to feel obligated just because he’d become aware.  They’d done just fine for the past four years.  Well, if you didn’t count her bad marriage and even shakier separation.  The divorce papers would be finalized any day, thank God.

He shook his head and it was obvious to her that she’d irritated him.  Funny, he hadn’t changed a whole lot since she’d seen him last.  He’d aged some and it seemed there wasn’t quite as much bounce in his step as there’d been before.  The twinkle in his eye wasn’t there, but she could understand why.  Everyone who lived on planet Earth knew what he was going through.   It had been very well headlined, much to his dismay she was sure. “Well, I expect something from you and like I said we can’t very well talk about it here.  Where can I call you?”

“Just give me your number and I’ll call you.”

“No.”  His voice was firm.   It was obvious that he wasn’t going to back down.  “We tried that once before, remember?  I never heard a word from you.”  She honestly never thought he would care.  A part of her was surprised he even remembered.  It had been almost five years.  “How ‘bout we just go somewhere right now and talk.  Or are you working?”

Releasing a rather loud huff of air, she shook her head no.  “I’m not working.  Haven’t been for about a year.  But I can’t leave. My Dad is here with me and Cody would be very disappointed.”

She opened her purse and dug out a pen and the only thing she could find to right on--the receipt from the snack bar.  She scribbled down her number on the back.  “Here.”

He took it.  “What about your husband?  Does he know?”

Cassidy sighed again, realizing what a complete wreck her life was.   “My husband will only be my husband for about another week, and no.  No one knows.   Only me, and now you, and your friend… and I suspect maybe your mother.”

“Cassie, everything okay?”  She looked over to see her father coming towards them, concern written across his sixty-year-old face. 

“Cody, go with Grandpa.  Okay?”  She let go of her son’s hand and ruffled his hair again.  “Mommy will be right there.” 

“Okay, Mommy.”  He looked up at her and smiled with bright blue eyes before trotting off to meet Grandpa.

“I’ll be right there, Dad,” Cassidy called out to him.  

The gray-haired man looked rather confused, but nodded his head and headed back to their seats with the little boy’s hand held securely in his own.

“Cassie?” For the first time she saw a tiny glimpse of a grin at his lips.  What she didn’t know was that it was the first touch of a smile Justin had shown in weeks.

She shook away the thought of her nickname and said to him what she knew she needed to say.  “Look, I’m sorry.  Okay?  But what was I supposed to do?  Call you up and tell you the truth?  Would you even have believed me?”

Justin shrugged.  He honestly didn’t know.  All he did know was that he’d missed the first four years of his son’s life and that made him very sad.  “I don’t know,” he answered honestly.  “But he’s my son and I think I deserve a chance to be his daddy.”  His heart ached at what he’d just said.  He was a daddy.  It was something he’d wanted more than anything and here suddenly he was--had been for four years with no fucking clue!

“Justin,” her voice was rather shaky when she spoke his name this time.  “That’s touching. It really is.  But you don’t have to do this.”

“Quit fucking telling me what I do or don’t have to do.   Alright?”  He was getting pissed off and his voice probably was a little louder than it should have been.  He instantly softened at the realization.  “Look.  I am going to call you tomorrow.”  He leaned in closer.  He wanted her to know just how serious he was.  “I hope to God you answer your phone.  Please don’t turn this into something ugly.  I don’t want to get lawyers involved, but I will.  He’s my son too and I have every right to be a part of his life, just as much as you do.” 

He turned and walked away before she could say a word.  Suddenly basketball didn’t sound so fun anymore.  He got back to his seat and told them he was ready to go home.   And they did.

Cassidy was shaking when she returned to her seat.  He wouldn’t actually try to take Cody away from her, would he?  The little boy had no idea who his father was.  It would tear him completely apart. 

“Sweetheart, what is going on?” her father asked before she’d even sat down.  The look on her face must have shown a thousand concerns.  She had at least that many going through head at the moment.  “Wasn’t that that Justin Timberlake guy?  How do you know him and why did he look so upset with you?”

“Daddy,” she called him.  “I can’t talk about this right now.”  And she looked down at Cody without even realizing she was doing so.

“That’s not--  Is it?”

She turned away, trying to focus on the game.  She couldn’t look him in the eye.  He’d already figured out the truth and her refusal to answer was all the confirmation he’d need.  Her father knew her well.  Better than anyone.

He’d softened up quite a bit over the past few months.  At first when she’d announced that she was getting divorced he’d been furious.  Then when she explained why, he was furious again only not at her but her soon-to-be ex.  The marriage had turned ugly rather quickly and Jason Brown had turned out to be the exact opposite of what she’d thought she’d married.   She thought she had married a kind, gentle and loving man.  In all honesty, she'd married a liar, an abuser and a cheat--although not in that exact order.  The lying came first--lying about the cheating of course.   Then, when she’d finally gathered enough proof to call him on it, came the abuse.  That’s when she’d walked out the door and never looked back.  She’d let him hit her one time.  It would never ever happen again.

Luckily for her she was getting a rather nice settlement from the divorce, including their home in Beverly Hills.  It was odd that a man who liked to cheat on his wife would put a clause in the prenup in regards to committing adultery--a clause that granted her a much bigger chunk of his estate than if things had ended under different and less heartbreaking circumstances.   The only explanation she could fathom was that his ego was so fucking big that he thought he’d never get caught.  Or maybe he thought if he did he could just beat her into submission and she’d actually let him get away with it.  Wrong!  He’d definitely picked the wrong girl.

But it had made a rather ugly legal battle, which made her even more nervous at Justin's mention of lawyers.  Jason had tried everything in the book to completely write her off and she'd got lucky.  She'd had a good attorney and was able to get what was rightfully hers.  Now she was about five days away from signing papers, thinking that she was finally free, but running into Justin Timberlake had brought a world of stress back into her life. 

If he tried to take her son she’d have nothing left in her life at all.  She couldn’t let that happen.  No way.

© BrandyRae 2005

“J, man… are you sure?  I mean, the kid looks like you, no doubt.  But I also know that you’re going through a really rough time right now and I don’t think you’re thinking all that clearly.  How do you know for sure without having tests done?” 

Justin had spent half the morning on the phone with his attorney, plus two other attorneys from the firm.  He wanted to know what kind of rights he had, but the only thing he was hearing was advice on taking a damn paternity test! 

Trace was just echoing more of the same.  He understood where they were all coming from, but still, it just wasn’t what he wanted to hear.  “Trace, how more blunt do I have to be?  I had sex with this girl almost five years ago, in the back of a limo,” that part was irrelevant, but for some reason he liked adding it in, “with absolutely no protection.  It was stupid, yes.  But it happened.” 

“I have heard the story, J.  I was there when you wrote the fucking song, although you never mentioned not wearing a fucking rubber, you goddamn idiot.” 

Justin shushed the technicality away with a wave of his hand.  “Doesn’t really matter now, does it?  Point is-- that’s my kid.  I feel it in my bones.  That’s my son and, besides, why would she lie now?  If she was going to try and get money out of me, which obviously she doesn’t need considering she married Jason fucking Brown, one of the highest paid quarterbacks in the NFL--”

“And a real fucking asshole, too,” Trace interjected.

Justin nodded in agreement and continued.  “If she wanted money, she would have tried to get it from me already.”

Trace just shook his head.  “If you’re so convinced, then what’s the big deal having the test done?”

“He’s four years old.  I don’t want to put him through that.”

“It’s a fucking DNA test, J.  That’s it.  No big deal.   It’s not like they have to extract bone marrow or some shit.  They don't even draw blood anymore, just swab your mouth with a q-tip thing.”

Justin realized that Trace was right, and everyone else for Christ’s sake, but how could he ask for the test now? After he’d made such a big deal about knowing Cody was his.  He didn’t want to seem that cold.  “Well, regardless, I told her I would call and I need to do that before it gets any later.  I’d like to meet with her today, if I can, and at least figure out what we do next.  I want to get to know my son.”  He stepped out of the kitchen, leaving the conversation at that and heading upstairs to his office where things were a bit more private.

He prayed to God she answered the phone.  He was scared to death that she was going to try and hide from him.  He wasn’t sure why, but the feeling was there and it scared the shit out of him.  He’d already missed the first four years of Cody’s life, he didn’t want to miss anymore.

The phone rang a good four times.  His stomach felt completely tied in knots.    He found himself quietly chanting, “Please answer.  Please answer.”

Finally after the sixth, she did.  “Hello?”

“Cassidy?”

”Yes?” 

He wondered what had happened to all the confidence and arrogance she’d exuded five years ago.  She didn’t have the same spunk as she’d had back then. “Hi.  It’s Justin.  Justin Timberlake.”

“Hi,” she said calmly, nervously.

“I hope I didn’t catch you at a bad time?” he asked.  This was awkward and he wanted to tread lightly, cautiously.

“No, not really.”

“Um, do you think we could meet sometime today?  Do you have any free time?”

“I’m free right now,” she answered to his surprise.

Inwardly he let out a sigh of relief.  “Okay, well I can meet now.  Where at?”

“Do you mind coming here?  Cody is just about to go down for a nap and that would give us time to talk.”

He wasn’t expecting that, but he was definitely eager to see the environment his son was living in.  It was amazing how he instantly felt concerned.  It was like an instant attachment, something he’d never experienced before.  “Okay.  I just need directions.”

Cassidy explained how to get to her home and then hung up the phone.  She was suddenly very nervous.  She should have asked if he was coming alone.  What if he was bringing a lawyer?  Surely things couldn’t happen so quickly.  They’d need testing done first, right?  Just word alone wasn’t enough to prove that Cody was his.  She hadn’t listed Justin’s name on the birth certificate.  There was no record of Cody’s father anywhere.

The thought of him trying to take Cody away from her had haunted her all night and all morning.  Her little boy was her everything. 

It was amazing to think she almost hadn’t had him.  When she’d found out she was pregnant her first thought was to end it.   She had been so focused on her career at the time, and nothing else.  So she’d made the appointment and even sat in the doctor’s office.  But when it came right down to it, she just couldn’t go through with it.  She’d gone straight to her parent’s house and confessed.  Of course she’d never told them who the father was or the exact circumstances.  It had been much easier to say it had simply been a very short relationship and that the man wanted nothing to do with her.

She also realized that fact could make things a little difficult now.  Her father hadn’t questioned her the day before at the game, but surely his mind was wandering and he was probably thinking pretty nasty thoughts about Justin.  She was going to have to straighten that out now and that’s another thing she didn’t want to deal with.

Then, of course, there was the major fact of her son--their son.  How would she tell him that Justin was his daddy?  Should she just tell him outright?  Should she let them get to know each other and then tell him?  She had absolutely no idea what to do and the whole situation had stressed her so deeply that she hadn’t been able to eat a thing all day.

With all the stress in her life over the last several months she’d lost a good ten pounds.  She hoped things were going to get better soon because she really didn’t have anymore spare pounds to lose.  She was whittling down to nothing. 

Forty-five minutes spanned between the time she’d hung up the phone and heard the buzz at the gate.  She’d spent the majority of it snuggling with Cody in his bedroom while he watched a movie before eventually drifting off to sleep for his afternoon nap.  She was afraid--afraid their relationship was about to change in a very significant way and she wanted to cherish him while she still could.  She wanted to hold him every second, but she knew that was just unrealistic.

Nervously she marched down the stairs, hitting the security panel at the bottom.   “Yes?”

“It’s Justin.” She heard him say.

“Okay.”  She hit the button to open the gate.

Then she took in several deep breaths.  Slowly she made way through the foyer, stopping in front of the grand front entrance.   It was overdone, something her ex-husband was responsible for, with high vaulted ceilings and a very expensive, imported, crystal chandelier.  She hated it.

Practicing her meditating breaths, trying to stay calm, she rested her forehead against the solid oak entrance.  The breathing wasn’t working, she was still nervous as hell.  Part of her wanted to open the door and watch him pull up, simply because the anticipation was killing her.  She was praying to God that he was alone.  Once she knew for sure she’d feel better--hopefully.

Finally she heard the lull of his tires, then the engine cut, his door slam, the alarm chirp, and seconds after, his knock.  She took in three more deep breaths and slowly turned the handle. 

There he was--all by himself.  She gave a tight-lipped grin and opened the door completely, allowing him to step inside.   His eyes scanned the large-scaled entry way and she instantly felt herself explaining.  “I’m getting ready to remodel,” she announced curtly.

His eyes found her then.  “Just looks a little more flashy then I’d expected.”

“It’s my ex-husband’s taste, not mine.”

He gave a single nod and shrugged his hands into the front of his jean pockets.

“I thought we could sit in the kitchen.  I have fresh coffee if you’re interested.”  She didn’t wait for his response, she began heading toward the kitchen assuming he’d follow.

And she didn’t have to look back to know that he was.

She moved straight for the Sub Zero fridge--a nervous habit--and pulled out the creamer.   It didn’t matter what she was getting, she was simply trying to avoid him in every way possible. 

“Thanks, but I don’t really want any.”  She caught sight of him then as he slid into one of the tall, mahogany barstools that lined one side of the granite-topped island.  “From the way that you’re shaking, I doubt you really want any either.”

Deep breaths, she told herself.  Deep breaths.  “I’m sorry.  After what you said yesterday, I’m just a little nervous that you’re going to try and take my son away from me and, honestly, that scares the shit out of me.”  There.  She’d said it.  The truth.  Still, she didn’t feel any better.

“Cassie.  Can I call you that?” He didn’t wait for her to answer.  “Look, that is the last thing I want to do.  Okay?  Stop worrying.”

She felt the sting of tears and it was the last thing she wanted.  God forbid he see her tears.  She didn’t even know him.  But still she could feel it coming on and she wasn’t sure how to stop it.  “Can you excuse me for a second?” 

Justin noticed the glossiness in her dark brown eyes before she’d turned and rushed out of the room.  He wasn’t sure what he’d done to make her cry, but he thought he’d been behaving fairly well.  Still, he felt bad for making her upset.  But he also realized there was no way around it.  It was an upsetting situation, but it was one that he had not caused or asked for.

He certainly wasn’t going to let a relationship with his only son just slip out of his grasp.  Not now.  Not now that he knew.

He wanted to ask if he could see him, but he knew she needed to calm down first.  He just wanted to peek at him, just look at him again, almost like he needed to confirm that he was real.  He was such a beautiful little boy.  So completely him.  That little boy was his son and he just wanted to hold him and love him and do all the things that dads and sons do.  He couldn’t wait.

She stepped back into the kitchen a few minutes later and from what he could tell she’d managed to pull herself back together.  “I’m not trying to upset you,” he told her instantly as she made way across from him, standing firm ground on the opposite side of the counter.  “I understand this is hard for you, but please think about how hard this is for me.  All I’ve been able to think about is how I missed the first four years of my son’s life,” now he felt a little choked up himself, but it was something he’d learned to hide well, “And you have no idea how sad that is to me.  There’s nothing I can do to make up for it.”

He wasn’t trying to make her cry, but it was like his words turned the handle of the faucet as tears instantly dripped from her eyes.  She brought a hand up and wiped at the droplets incessantly.  “You do not have any idea the amount of guilt I feel for that,” she said, shaking her head as her sight dropped down.  “Dammit.  I swore to myself I wouldn’t cry.”

“Funny.  I wouldn’t have thought the woman I met five years ago could cry.”

She only seemed more irritated at herself after what he’d said.  “I’m not as tough as I used to be,” she stated quietly.

“Well, neither am I, and I'm not trying to make your life more difficult.  I just want to get to know my son.  That’s it.”

Her head lifted, watery eyes focusing in on him, and he found himself studying her for just a moment.  Her dark hair was still rather long, only it was pulled back neatly at the nape of her neck, long bangs swooped to one side and tucked behind her right ear.  Her face was thinner than he remembered and shadows lingered underneath her eyes--something he was sure she’d tried to cover with make-up.  Of course, he knew all the tricks and just how to spot them.  He was a pro at covering up.  But even so, she was still beautiful.  Right now she was just a gorgeous woman in one hell of a lot of pain.

He couldn’t imagine someone who could relate better than himself.

“I’m really sorry for breaking down like this.  I don’t even know you and here I am balling.  I feel like such an idiot.”

Something unparalleled drew out his hand and touched it to hers.  “Please.  First of all, don’t apologize.  I understand that you are going through a lot right now.  Maybe you haven’t heard, but I haven’t exactly had the easiest few months myself.   And secondly, we do know each other.   Definitely not as well as we should, but we’re not total strangers.”  Close to it, but he was trying whatever he could to make her feel better.

She wiped away the last trace of her tears.  “So you want to see his baby pictures?”

Justin felt himself grinning as wide as possible, the biggest he’d managed in months.  “Yes.”

Forty-five minutes later they’d made it through the first six months of Cody’s life.  Cassidy hated herself for what she’d done.  He was obviously hurt over missing out on those four years, but she had honestly felt it was the right thing to do at the time.  She couldn’t imagine how her life would have played out if it would have been different.

Maybe if she would have called like he’d wanted her to, so long ago…

“Cody’s going to be waking up soon.  I’m not sure what to tell him yet,” she spoke up out of the blue, drawing Justin’s attention away from Cody’s first Christmas. 

“My attorney’s tell me that I need to have a test done.”  He said it quietly, as if he felt bad for mentioning such a thing. 

“A paternity test.  Yes, I agree.”

“There’s no question, right?  He’s mine?”

Sadly enough for her sex life at the time, Cody was definitely his.  “I’m one hundred percent positive.”

“I would hate to think-- It's just, I already feel myself getting attached.”

She grinned softly, understandingly, and this time it was her that reached out to touch him.  “You were the only one for months.”

“Oh,” he stated, his voice still soft.  “Can I just ask?  You had said you were on the pill.  You weren’t?”

“I lied,” she answered simply.

“I see.”

“What were the chances?  It was only once--once without a condom, anyway.”

A tiny grin played at his lips.  “Well, that’s always good for the ego.”  For the first time since she’d found him kneeling in front of her son the day before, she was reminded of what it was that had attracted her to him so many years ago. 

He still had it.

But she made sure not to draw attention to it.  “So back to what we should tell him.”  She didn’t even realize she’d used the word “we”.   “Maybe it would be best to wait until after the test.  In the meantime, we’ll just tell him that you and I are friends.”

He nodded, accepting the idea.  “Are we friends, then?”

“I think we’re going to have to be.  We have a child together.  We’re stuck dealing with each other for the rest of our lives.”

It was then that Cassidy heard the shuffle of little feet padding down the hard, oak staircase.  “Mommy?” his tiny voice called out.

“Down here, sweetheart.  In the family room.”

Justin’s heart melted instantly as he watched his little boy maneuver his way down the curving staircase, one hand carefully gripping the banister as he took slow, cautious steps.  He was absolutely the most adorable thing Justin had ever seen--decked out in Gap for kids judging from the logo on his shirt--dark denim and a dark blue long-sleeved tee.  Nike tennis shoes adorned his feet.

This was a kid after his own heart.  He couldn’t wait to take him shopping.

“What’s he into?” Justin heard himself asking, quickly.

“Basketball and dinosaurs.”

“Well, he’s gotta be mine, then,” he muttered under his breath before Cody came into earshot.  Suddenly he was wishing he’d come with a gift.  “I should have brought him something.”

She shook her head no as Cody finagled his way into her arms.  She squeezed him tight, but her eyes didn’t leave Justin for a second.  “What you’re going to give him is much better than a gift.”

For some reason, hearing that brightened up his day more than anything yet. 

“Cody, do you remember mommy’s friend Justin?  He met you at the basketball game yesterday.”  The boy nodded shyly and gave Justin his attention even though he was still hanging on to his mommy.  “Justin is a very nice man and we’re going to be seeing a lot more of him, okay?”

“Like Jason?” the boy asked.

The flash of pain in her eyes didn’t go unnoticed.  “No.  Not like Jason.   Better.”

Justin wasn’t sure why, but it gave him a great deal of satisfaction to learn that his boy didn’t call another man daddy, even if that man had married his son’s mom.  Fact was, he’d met Jason Brown on a few occasions and he was a top-rate asshole.  Someday, when he and Cassidy felt a little more comfortable with each other, he was going to ask her why in the hell she’d married him.

“Do you like Tarzan?” Cody asked, easing away from Cassidy and sinking into his own space on the couch between where they sat.  Justin wondered if the boy even realized there were pictures of him laid out on the coffee table.

With a nod, he told him, “of course.”  As if he would be crazy not to.

“He means the movie.  He loves the Disney movie,” Cassidy explained.

Justin nodded his head with understanding, grinning with fascination.  He was a having a conversation with his son!

“You wanna watch it?” Cody was already sliding off the sofa, while still keeping his pretty blue eyes on Justin.  His mother raked her fingers through his short, matted curls before the boy could slip away.

“Sure,” Justin answered cheerily.

And without another word, Cody walked across the room to the wall of built-in cabinets, opened one and turned on what Justin was guessing the DVD player as he watched him open the video case and put a disc in it, then he grabbed a rather large remote--probably touch screen--and marched back to the sofa.  He climbed back onto the cushion and perched himself comfortably between Cassidy and Justin, his feet dangling just off the front of the deep cushioned couch. 

Cody was smart and Justin was smiling even bigger now.

“Here mommy.”  Cody handed the technical device to his mother.

“The remote’s a little more complicated,” Cassidy explained with a smirk as she programmed it to turn on the plasma TV and start the movie.

“Yeah, I’ve got something similar at home.  He puts the movie in all by himself, though, that’s pretty smart.”

Now Cassidy was smiling, ruffling the boy’s hair one more time and looking straight towards Justin.  “He’s very smart.  And can I just say thank you for the curls?  I love them.”   Her grin turned whimsical as she'd said it.  Then she leaned in and kissed the boy’s temple.

“Yeah…” Justin drew it out.  “He’ll learn to hate them later.  Trust me.”

© BrandyRae 2005

Time got carried away and before Justin could think twice about anything he had stayed for dinner.  He felt like he was only half himself.  Partly he was just in awe most of the time, amazed at how incredible his little boy was.   He found himself just simply watching—enjoying every second.

He probably looked glazed over the majority of the time.  He’d never felt so misty-eyed in his entire life.  He was completely enamored, and totally in love.  He had a child and Justin couldn’t wait for the day when he and his little boy could be introduced as father and son.

After they ate their “gourmet” meal of chicken strips, mac ‘n’ cheese and green beans—Cody’s choice—they congregated back into the family room where the little boy played with toy dinosaurs and the two adults continued with their conversation.  They were getting to know each other quite a bit better, but mostly they talked about Cody.

Justin enjoyed hearing everything about his little boy.  He wanted all the details—when he walked, when he talked, when he got his first tooth, how often he'd been sick and his entire medical history, you name it!  He was trying to catch up on four years in one day!

His cell phone rang several times over the course of his visit.  He hadn’t answered it once.  In fact, he’d finally gone as far as to shut it off.  He was going to get an earful for that later, especially considering his mother had been one of the people calling.  He’d never been the type of son to ignore his mom, but he just didn’t feel like talking to anyone right now.  They’d all have questions he wasn’t ready to answer.

When Cody was deep in play and completely out of earshot—marching his T-Rex up mountains he’d made out of spare sofa pillows—Justin took the opportunity to ask a few things that had been weighing a bit heavily on his mind.  He realized it was probably a sore subject, but there was one thing in particular that he had to know.  “So he was good to him?” he asked, nodding his head towards his son.

“Jason?” she asked, knowing who the "he" was that justin was referring to, just as he thought she would.  “Yeah.  He was a jerk to me, but great with Cody.”

He felt a huge amount of relief upon hearing that.  “Yeah,” he continued.  “I was kind of surprised when I heard.  I mean, from the times I’ve met him he’s always been kind of a huge… asshole.”  He whispered the last part to be extra sure that Cody didn’t hear.

“Wish you would’ve told me that before I married him,” she smirked, obviously joking. 

“Um, maybe if you would have called me like I wanted you to,” he joked back.

Her eyes rolled, a grin playing at her full, natural lips.  “I know I will never hear the end of that for the rest of my life.  Especially now that I know I’m going to have to talk to you for the rest of my life.”  She reached out and gave his shoulder a playful shove.  It excited him just a little, a tiny buzz of excitement fluttering in his chest.  Their mood toward each other had taken a complete one-eighty since he’d first arrived, when things had been so nervous and somber.  Now the mood was light and playful and he was enjoying her company very much.  Part of him thought it was only because she was the mother of his child and of course he would be drawn to her.  But the other more sex-driven part of him couldn’t help but remember all that had happened between them in Atlanta some five years ago.  And the fact that he’d never found anyone else sexually who could compare.

He pushed the thoughts out of his head.  It definitely wasn’t the right time to be thinking about all that.

“Justin, there’s something I need to tell you,” she said, her tone turning more serious all the sudden.

Concern sprang to his face.  “Okay.”

“My family.  I told them that the guy was someone who I had a very short relationship with and that he wanted nothing to do with me.”

“Greaaat…” he sounded it out.  “So now I’m a big… jerk.”  He wanted to say “big fucking jerk” but he caught himself before dropping the ever-popular f-bomb.  It was going to be a tough habit to break.

“I’m sorry.  There was just no way I could tell them what really happened.”

“Yeah, I guess that would’ve been pretty traumatic.  So what are you going to tell them now?”

She sighed loudly.  “I’m trying to figure that out.  My dad obviously figured it out yesterday at the game even though he didn’t say anything about it.   Well, he asked and I didn’t answer which was all the answer he needed and then it was dropped.  Anyway, I’m sure he is busy thinking very horrible thoughts about you and all that you did to me.”

Justin rubbed a hand to his forehead.  “Um, your dad looked a little scary.  Does he live here?”

She giggled and he felt that ball of excitement in his chest again.  “My parents live about 45 minutes away and don’t worry.   I will at least tell them that you had no idea about—you know.”

“Uh yeah, no need for details.  I’m guessing your dad would probably want to beat me up for that too.”   He was referring to the now infamous limo ride, of course.

She giggled again and he was cursing himself out inside his head.  “My father is slightly over-protective.  Yes.  God forbid he ever gets a hold of Jason.”  Then she tilted her head a bit and looked upwards.  “Well, maybe not,” she smirked, grinning devilishly.

“Should I be feeling the same way?  About getting a hold of him, that is?”

“What do you mean?” she asked.

“I mean, should I want to kill him too?” 

A look of surprise fell across her face as she blew a tiny smirk through her nose.  “That’s sweet, considering you haven’t seen me in almost five years and now you want to beat up my ex-husband.  But do you think you could take him?”

He wasn’t expecting her to throw that at him.  He realized now that she was keeping things very playful—on purpose.  She didn’t want to say too much, but that was fine.  He wasn’t about to push her to talk.  “He’s a quarterback, not a freakin’ Guard or DT.”

There was that giggle again—damn it.  Apparently his innate sense to defend her was funny.  “Justin, he’s 220 pounds of solid muscle.  Come on.  You’re what?  A buck-fifty?”

He shot her the most incredulous look.  He wasn’t that fucking skinny.  But why was he surprised?  Five years and she was still perfect at crushing his ego like it was an empty soda can.  “So he’s got a few pounds on me.  I’ve got a good six hundred in my back pocket.”  He was referring to his security of course.

At that she outright laughed.  “Why are we talking about this anyway?”

He shrugged.  “I have no clue.”

“I have to tell you, though.  I haven’t laughed this much in a really long time.”

“Well, I may be a skinny bastard, but at least I know how to make you laugh.”  His eyes drifted away from her then, over to Cody.  The boy had collapsed against the pillows, still holding onto T-Rex as he watched the cartoon that was playing quietly on the TV.

“He’s getting tired,” Cassidy announced.  “He’s usually out by nine.”

Justin looked at his watch.  It was just after eight.  “Should I go?”  But he answered it for her before she had the chance.  “I probably should.  I’ve shut myself off from everyone that’s been overly-concerned about me lately and they’re probably really starting to freak out.”

“What did your mom say?” she asked, out of the blue.

“She didn’t.  I haven’t told her yet.”

“Oh.”

“She knows something is up, but not exactly.”  He paused for just a brief moment.  “Yeah, that’s going to be a fun conversation.  Guess what, mom!  You’re a grandma!”  She smirked softly, her eyes darting to Cody for just a second probably to see if he was paying attention.   He wasn’t.  “Sorry, I shouldn’t have said that, huh?”

Her head shook.  “It’s fine.  I don’t think he’ll catch on from the mention of a grandma.  He’s too into SpongeBob right now anyway.”

Justin nodded and started scooting to the edge of the cushion, even though he didn’t really want to leave.  But he knew he should.  “So, I’m going to find out for sure what needs to be done for this test and I’ll give you a call.  I want to get it taken care of right away.  I hope that’s okay with you?”

“Of course.  I don’t see why we’d need to put it off.  I’m sure you’re anxious for him to know.”

Justin nodded.  “How do you think he’ll react?”

Cassidy shrugged.  “I have no idea.”

Justin found himself nodding again.  “Well, I guess I need to have a long talk with my mom when I get home.”  He was almost stating it to himself more than her.

“Yeah, we’re going to visit my parents in the morning so I can let them know.  I think once they get over the initial shock they’ll be happy.”

“Well, just let your dad know that I’m pretty good at sports.  In case he’s worried.”

Cassidy chuckled and said, “Okay, I will.”

“I just don’t want him to be disappointed that I’m an entertainer and not an athlete.”

Her hand reached out and patted his knee softly.  His eyes dropped instantly to the spot, as he was trying to shoo away the notion that he liked it when she touched him.  Memories were haunting him again.  Memories of bare skin—how it looked, how it felt and, best of all, how it tasted.   “Don’t worry.  He won’t be.”

“I’ll call you tomorrow?”  He asked.  “Maybe when you get back from your parents you guys can come by my place.  I’ve got lots of fun stuff.  Does he like video games or is he too little for that?”

“He has his own, more kid friendly ones.  I try not to let him play too much.”

Justin nodded, a tight grin at his lips.  “I think I’m going to have go shopping tomorrow.”

“Remember what I said about the gifts.”

He smirked, not having it.  There was no way she could stop him from at least spoiling his son a little bit—okay, a lot!  “He needs stuff for my house so he doesn’t get bored,” he justified.  Then he stood up, because if he didn’t he might never leave.

“Cody, come tell Justin goodbye,” Cassidy called out.

The little boy huffed as he hoisted his body up, pushing off with his hands.  “Bye Justin,” he said, marching towards where the bigger man stood.

Justin kneeled down to Cody’s eye level.  “See ya later, little man.”  And with that he found himself reaching out to ruffle those blonde curls for himself.  Apparently it was a contagious move.  The boy’s hair was silky soft and Justin had to fully resist the urge to scoop Cody’s little body up and squeeze the air right out of it. 

Standing back up, he watched as Cody trotted back to the open space between the coffee table and the TV, and plopped back down against the pile of pillows.  Justin sighed, not realizing he had done it so obviously.

“Don’t worry.  He’s a pretty loving little boy.  It won’t be long.” 

Justin wondered if she had just totally read his mind, but he didn’t question it.  “Okay, well, I’ll get out of here now before you decide to kick me out.”  He started walking before she could answer.  He looked back to see if she was following.  She was.  “So I’ll call you tomorrow?”

“Yeah.  Let me give you my cell number and you never did give me yours, either.”

She walked him to the front door, where they both exchanged all of their phone numbers, and then promised to talk the next day.  Justin assuring he’d have more information about the paternity test.  Then he was out the door, in his car, driving down the road with a mountain full of thoughts going through his mind.

He had a son.

And it was the best gift he could have gotten in the whole entire world.

Lynn Harless paced the kitchen floor for the fiftieth time in the past hour.   She was going to kill her son when he got home.  He never ignored her calls to such a degree.  She was furious.  

Of course she was worried, too, which was mainly why she was so furious.   What if something had happened to him?  What if he’d been in an accident?  What if he was lying in some hospital bed and she had absolutely no idea?

For some reason she didn’t think that was the case.  When she’d called earlier his phone had ringed a good four times before going to his voicemail.  Then later in the evening when she’d tried again, it went straight to voicemail.  He’d turned it off.

He better hope he was hurt, because she was going to kill him!

Trace had told her not to worry.  That Justin had some things he had to deal with and that he was sure Justin would fill her in soon.  Well, he goddamn better.  That’s all she had to say about it!

Her motherly instincts told her it had something to do with the woman she’d seen him talking to at the game the day before.  The woman with the little boy that was the spitting image of Justin at age 4 or 5.  There was no way her son could have hidden something like a child from her for that long of a time, was there?  She had always thought they had the best relationship.  He was always very open with her—sometimes too open! 

Still, she couldn’t shake away how much that little boy looked just like her son.  And of course there was the way that Justin had wanted to leave the game right after.  Sure, he’d been going through one of the roughest times in his life, but he’d been doing just fine before he’d ran into that woman and that little boy.

The past few months had been hell.  She’d practically moved to L.A., away from her husband in Tennessee, so she could be with her son.  Of course she spent a lot of time away from Paul anyway, and he was the best man imaginable to be so understanding about it for all this time—years and years.  But Justin was her only son and she was also his manager—one of them anyway.  He kept a lot of her attention, not that she’d wish it were different, and Paul was always very understanding.

Finally she heard Justin’s car pull up the drive.  A wave of relief washed over her as she was reassured that he was still alive.  Once she got through with him, that could be a different story though.

Rushing to the front door, she threw it open and stood, aggravated, her hands placed stiffly at her hips as she watched him stride up the walk casually.  He smiled goofily, kissing her butt before he’d even said a word.  “Hi momma,” he spoke just as sappily as the expression on his face appeared.

“Son, I have been worried sick about you.”

“I know.  I’m sorry.  I should have called.”  He moseyed up to her and slipped his hands through her arms and around her waist.  She instantly felt her anger crumbling.  His charm even worked on his own mother.  It was pitiful!  And all his father’s fault.

“You should have,” she agreed sternly.  “You shouldn’t have turned your phone off, either.”

“I don’t think I was getting a very good signal,” he said, still hugging on to her frame.

She pulled back enough to look down at him, his posture slumped so he could hide his face into the crook of her neck.  “Now, I don’t believe that for one second and you know it.”

He pulled back and straightened his tall frame.  “Damn,” he sighed.  “I was hoping you’d buy that one.”

She just shook her head no.

He let go of her.  “Well, come inside.  I’ve got some things I need to tell you.”

“I was expecting so.”

Thirty minutes later Justin had come clean with the whole ordeal.  He had a four year old son, Cody, from a woman that he’d spent one night with almost five years ago.  He left out the limo detail for his mother’s sake.  She could very well be mortified upon hearing all that. 

She’d heard the song he’d written, of course.  But with things like that they had a strict “don’t ask, don’t tell” policy.  She didn’t want to know and he didn’t want to tell her.  If she figured it out on her own then that was her problem.

Not surprisingly she handled the news fairly well.  Of course, she’d asked the same thing about Cody as everyone else—the lawyers, Trace.  “Are you sure?”

He explained that he was sure and Cassidy said she was sure, but that they were still taking the necessary steps to make everything legal, mainly a paternity test.

Then she took in a deep breath, perched at the small round table in his kitchen, and said it very slowly.  “So, I’m a grandma.”  It wasn’t a question, it was a statement.  She was letting it soak in.  He could tell.  Then she grinned.   “I think I like that idea.”

Justin grinned too—wide and proud.  “Momma, I have a little boy.”  He felt himself getting choked up and he realized if he could let it show with anyone it was her.  He said it again, softer and quieter.  “I have a little boy.”

“It looks that way, baby.”  She reached across the table and held onto his hand.  “Try not to get too excited about it until the test results come back.  I’d hate for it to be a mistake.  You’d be devastated.”

“I know he’s mine, momma.  I knew it the second I saw him before she even said a word about it.  I just felt it deep inside—that’s my child.”

She was smiling again.  “I know, baby.  I just don’t want you to get hurt.”

He nodded.  He understood and the thought of what she was saying scared him to death.  He was already attached, already connected and concerned.  But he knew there was no mistake.  He’d never felt so right about anything in his whole life.  “I think their gonna come over tomorrow.  Did you want to meet him?”

Nodding, she let out a deep breath.  “Of course, I do.  So tell me more about this Cassidy.  Is she a good woman?  Didn’t you say she was going through a divorce too?

“She, um, was married to be the biggest asshole football player in the league,” he explained.  “But don’t worry, I asked and she said he was only a jerk to her, not Cody.  But yeah, she’s a good woman.  I tried so hard to get in touch with her after we met, but I couldn’t find her and she never called.   Of course now I know why…”

“Justin, tell me the truth, is this the girl that you wrote that song about?”

He groaned, looking at her from the tops of his lids.  “Don’t ask me questions like that,” he huffed.

“Just tell me the truth.   I can handle it.  Besides, you’ve pretty much answered the question already.”

“Well, then… Yes.”

A look of horror washed over her face for a very brief second.  “Okay.”   Then she repeated it.  “Okay…”

“Hey, you asked!”

She put a hand to her chest.   “I know.  I know.  Okay, I’m over it now.  I am.  Really.”

“Look, that stuff doesn’t matter now.  And you can’t judge her because of what we did back then, either.  She is a part of my life now.  She is the mother of my child.”

“I understand that, son.   I do.  Why do you think I asked about her?”

“I know.  I just—this is going to be a little awkward at first and I want to make things as smooth as possible.”

Cassidy and Cody left their Beverly Hills mansion at nine a.m. to make it with plenty of time to talk before her mom and dad left to tee off at noon.  Depending on traffic, it could take anywhere from thirty minutes to an hour to make it to Northridge, where her parents owned a modest four bedroom home in a very nice, upscale neighborhood. 

Both of her parents were retired and she had offered to move them closer to her, into an even bigger home.  But they refused.  They had lived in that home for several years and the area was nice.  They had their own little network of friends that they played Bridge or golfed with.  They enjoyed their life.

She was about to throw them a huge curve.  It might even ruin their plans for the day, but she understood that it was something she needed to tell them right away.  It could have been worse.  There always could have been something worse.

Honestly, she felt that once she got it all out in the open, things would actually be better all around.  Although she might get a lecture from her mother for keeping such a secret for so long.

She wondered if her father had mentioned anything to her mom when he’d got home from the game.  It was hard to say.  He was pretty good at letting Cassidy do things in her own way and this was definitely one of those things.

Traffic didn’t turn out to be too extremely heavy.  It was ten minutes till ten when she pulled her Mercedes SUV into their driveway.  She hopped out, opened the back door for Cody and unbuckled him from his booster seat.  “You think grandpa will wanna play catch with me?”  the little boy asked.

“Um, remember what mommy said about needing to have a private talk with grandma and grandpa?”

“Yes,” the little boy answered, as she helped him down from the car and took his hand.

“So you can go play in your room for a little while and then maybe grandpa will play catch with you, okay?  If we have time.”

“Okay,” he agreed.   They walked up the neatly landscaped, stone pathway hand in hand and just as they were almost to the door, Cody asked, “Mommy? Do you think Justin likes to play catch?”

She found herself smiling uncontrollably.  “Yes, sweetheart.  I’m sure he that he does.  Maybe if we see him later you could ask him.”

His little head nodded up and down.  “Okay.”

Her stomach turned into a nervous pit of emptiness as she rose a fist and knocked on the door.  They were expecting her and they were expecting that she had something to talk about, but other than what her dad had figured out, they didn’t know much.

She only hoped they would be accepting toward Justin being Cody’s father and of him wanting to be an active part of Cody’s life.  In her heart she felt they would, once she explained to them she’d sort of lied about the whole situation in the first place.

Her mother opened the door, her shoulder length, chestnut colored hair tucked partially under a white visor hat.   Connie Nickel was decked out in pleated yellow golf shorts and a white polo shirt.  Her feet were bare and her olive skin held an extra bronze glow thanks to the amount of time she and her husband spent on their outdoor activities.  Overall she was a 59 year old version of her daughter.  Cassidy only hoped that she would age as well and as gracefully as her mom.

The woman smiled widely at the sight of her two favorite people standing on the front porch.  “Well, hello there.”  Instantly she kneeled down and opened her arms, waiting for Cody’s embrace.   “Doesn’t grandma get a big hug?” she finally asked.

The little boy bum rushed her then, throwing his arms around her.  “Hi grandma,” he spoke cheerily.

“Hi sweetheart.  I missed you.” 

It had only been a few days since they’d seen each other.

“I missed you, too, grandma.”

Brian Nickel popped up behind his wife with a wide yet curious grin.  “Good morning,” he spoke jovially.

“Morning Daddy,” Cassidy pushed forward a grin.  She was still nervous.

“Hey there kiddo.”   Her dad brushed a hand over Cody’s head.   “I’ve got something I need to show you.  Come with me.”   He took the little boy’s hand and gave Cassidy an all-knowing stare.  She understood the cue.  She was to go with her mom.

And she did.  Into the kitchen, where family discussions had always taken place.  “So Daddy tells me you have some news about Cody’s father?”  Her mother started, pouring a fresh cup of coffee from the half-full carafe.

Cassidy nodded as her mother poured a second mug for her and then slid it across the counter. 

“Well?”

“He’s, um—”   She started and then she stopped, realizing the best place to start would be with the lie she’d originally told.  “Remember when I said he wanted nothing to do with me?  When I first told you?”

Her mother nodded. “Yes.”

“Mom, I never told him.   He didn’t know.”

“I see,” she stated simply.

“I didn’t know him very well,” Cassidy found herself explaining.  “We met briefly and obvious things happened and,” she paused for a breath, “he wanted me to call him and I never did.”

“And he is Justin Timberlake, right?  The singer?”

Cassidy nodded.  “Daddy told you?”

Her father stepped into the room just at that moment.  “I couldn’t keep it from her Cassie.  You know that.”

“I know.”  Her eyes fell.  Suddenly she felt very ashamed.

“So can you fill me in on the parts I missed?” he asked.

The last thing Cassidy wanted to do was repeat what she’d just told her mom.  “She lied to us, dear.  They didn’t know each other very well and she never told him.”

Cassidy’s eyes rose up to meet her fathers.  His eyes were closed as he stood there quiet, breathing slowly.  He was absorbing it all.  Cassidy understood how her father worked.  There’d been a time where he might have flown off the handle over such news, but not now.  He’d calmed down so much since he’d retired.  And even more since her recent shaky divorce.  “Obviously he knows now,” the man finally spoke up.

“Yes and he very much wants to be a part of Cody’s life.”

“Well, that’s not a bad thing.  Is it?  The boy needs a father.  We all know that.”  Her dad was having a hard time keeping his cool, but he was managing.

“Yes, I think we can all agree on that, dear,” her mother stated.  She was overly calm—as usual. 

“Look, I am very sorry that I lied to you.  But it was not the easiest truth to come out with and I just don’t want you to think that any of this is Justin’s fault because it’s not.  It was all me.”

“Sweetheart, last time I remember, getting pregnant takes more than one person,” her mother remarked.

Cassidy just shook her head.   “Mom, please.  That may have been an argument when I was pregnant, but it’s a little late for that now.”

“I’m just saying, obviously it wasn’t all just you.”

Her head shook again, a disgusted grimace across her face.  This was the last thing she wanted to be talking about with them.

“I think we all know that, Con,” Her dad perked up.  Obviously it was the last thing he wanted to be discussing, as well.   “So what happens next?”

“Um, a paternity test just to be sure.  Then we tell Cody.”

Her mother grimaced this time.    “You are sure, right?”

“Yes mother.  God!”

“Well, you said paternity test, so…”

“I’m sure he wants to be sure,” Brian figured.  “He is a celebrity and even though we know you’re not that kind of person, he probably doesn’t… considering you just said yourself that the two of you don’t know each other very well.”  He was rubbing that part in her face—subtly, no doubt.  But definitely rubbing it in.

“It’s not so much him as his attorneys.  And I just want to see the proof before we say anything to Cody.” She stuck a flattened palm to the air.  “Don’t take that the wrong way.  I am 100 percent positive.  I just want to do everything the right way.  That’s all.”

© BrandyRae 2005

Cassidy did not have a clue what to expect as she pulled up the street to Justin’s house.  He’d called when she was on her way back from her parents, asked if they wanted to come over for lunch, then given her directions and the security code to get into his front gate.  A little trustworthy right off the bat, but she realized they were going to have to trust each other if they were planning to make this co-parenting work.

Obviously she’d accepted the invitation and she and Cody—who was sleeping in the backseat with his head slumped forward looking completely uncomfortable—were only a few minutes away.  Justin said he’d had information on the test and that they could talk it over after they ate.  He then mentioned something about being starving and she was instantly reminded of the late night room service they’d shared some five years earlier.

Of course she’d have been lying if she said she never thought about what had happened between them.  The worst had been mid-pregnancy, when her hormones were raging and she’d had no outlet for release—in other words, no man.  She’ d come so close to calling him then, but as soon as she’d look down at her little hump of a belly, she’d chicken out.  No way he’d have wanted what she’d wanted after realizing the state she was in, even if the baby was his!

But that seemed like ages ago now.  Shortly after Cody was born she met Jason.  He’d completely wined and dined her—and caught her at a time in her life when she felt like maybe it was time to try and build a relationship with a man for the sake of her son.  Too bad she picked the completely wrong one!   Thank God Jason had always been nothing but kind to Cody.  Cassidy wouldn’t be able to forgive herself if it had been any differently.

She’d let her mind wander just a bit after Justin had left the night before—What if she had called him up back then?  Would they have tried to build a relationship?  Would it have worked?  Maybe they both would have been saved from the heartache they were suffering presently.  Or maybe their heartache would have been even worse.

Life was a gamble.  There was no guessing at the “what ifs”.  It never worked.

Pulling up to what she believed was his home, although she couldn’t exactly see it, she found something—or someone, rather—that she wasn’t expecting.  Trace was standing just outside the tall, wooden gate, and it looked like he was waiting there just for her.  She stopped a few feet in front of him, watching as he came jogging to her passenger side door.  When he tried it and it was locked, he knocked on the window.  Her hand flew to the automatic door lock, it clicked and he hopped in.

“Slight change of plans,” he announced.  Then he looked at the little boy asleep in the back before his sight met with hers.   “Hi, I’m Justin’s friend, Trace.  You remember me, right?”

She nodded.  “Yes, of course.  What do you mean, change of plans?”

“If you could just drive around to the back of the house, I’ll explain.” 

She did, realizing that driving around to the back of Justin’s house meant driving around a rather large city block—that was all his.  Not that she was surprised, of course, or all that impressed.  It wasn’t like she was living in a shack and with the position she was, money was the last thing to tilt her head.

As she drove, Trace talked.  Apparently Justin’s ex-wife had shown up out-of-the-blue and he was trying to escape.  The plan was for him to meet them out back and Justin and Trace would switch places.  It was a little evil, if you asked Cassidy, but she could totally understand.  She didn’t want to deal with her ex—or soon-to-be as they hadn’t actually signed papers yet—right now either.

Finally they came to a spot where the fence that surrounded the property was just slightly ajar.  A secret gate, perhaps?  “Stop here,” Trace told her.

She did.  Quickly Justin popped out from behind that small camouflaged door in the fence. 

“Nice seeing you again,” Trace grinned and gave one more quick glance back at Cody before hopping out and Justin sliding in.

“I am so sorry,” the man immediately spoke.  

“It’s okay,” she told him as he shut the car door, waving a quick goodbye to his friend before he disappeared behind the same small door.  “Where are we going?”

“It doesn’t matter.  Trace is going to call me when it’s safe to go back—probably 15 or so.”

She nodded just once and pulled the car back onto the road.   “Does he work for you?”

“Trace?”  Justin craned his neck to look back at Cody.  When he returned his sight to Cassidy he had the biggest, goofiest grin on his face.  “Is it okay for him to sleep like that?”

Cassidy nodded again.  “Yeah.  It’s fine.   Every kid I’ve ever known sleeps in the car like that.”

He bobbed his head a little bit and then continued, “So, you asked about Trace.  Yeah, he works for me.  We’ve been friends since we were born I think—something like that.  We’ve known each other longer than we remember.  Anyway, he started as my assistant and just kind of worked his way up as he learned the business.  Now he handles a lot of stuff for me and I pretty much just couldn’t live without the guy.  He’s married and his wife is expecting any day now—a little girl.”  Justin huffed out a breath.  “And that’s Trace’s life story.”  He grinned and asked, “How’d it go with the folks?”

“Um, not bad.  A little difficult looking my dad in the eye after admitting that I lied.  He’s really big on truth and all that.   But they both agree that this will be better in the long run.”

“You mean me?”

She looked back to make sure Cody was still sleeping.  He was.  “I mean Cody having a father—so yes, you.”

Justin smirked.  “Turn here,” he told her.

Without questioning, she did as he instructed. 

“Well, that’s good.  I guess…”   His eyes focused from the road to her.  “So your dad wasn’t, like, upset because I’m a singer and not a football player or something?”

Cassidy shook her head.  “Would you stop with that?   No, of course not.  Don’t be silly.”

“Well, just making sure…”

She caught herself grinning as she drove down a curvy road.   Large, beautifully landscaped homes lined both sides of the street.  It was a neighborhood very similar to her own.  “So what did you find out about the test?” she asked.

“Oh,” he said as if he had forgotten all about it.   “Well, my attorney had a kit messengered over this morning.  It’s very simple and we should have the results in 7 to 10 days.  They’re going to rush it for me, of course.”

“Of course.”

“So we can do it today if you want.”

“Yeah, that’s fine.” 

Silence filled the car then as she continued to drive aimlessly.  Cassidy stole a few discreet glances at Justin while he gazed out the window.  He was still just as gorgeous as he’d been five years before.  In fact, she wasn’t sure why exactly, but each time she saw him he seemed to be better and better looking.  His hair was cut very short to his head and his jaw was clean shaven—not how it had been that first day she had seen him at the game, when he’d had what looked like the start of a full beard.  It was hard to tell exactly, but he looked maybe a little thinner than she remembered.  Considering her current weight and stress, she understood completely.  Today he was dressed very casually in a plain pair of dark denim jeans and a plain white designer t-shirt—it had a very small logo on the chest.  Not that she expected any less.  She’d always been a bit of a brand whore herself.

She still had one eye on him as he chuckled softly to himself, his head shaking back and forth and a hand raising to his brow.  “What?” she asked curiously.

“Oh, I was just imagining the scene playing out back at the house.  Poor Trace—having to deal with that.  I owe him my life, I think.”

“She going to be pissed because you snuck out like that?”   She wasn’t sure if it was okay to ask, but she did it anyway.

It must have been, as he laughed a little more.  “Irate is more like it.  I don’t even know why she showed up.  Something about some photo albums.”  He shook his head.  “Like I want to keep pictures of her and her family from their vacation ten years ago.”  His lip snarled.   “Crazy woman, I swear.”

“So if she just came to get some photo albums then why would she care if you’re there or not?”

“Exactly.”  He pointed at her expressively.   “My thoughts exactly.”

“She doesn’t know, does she?”

Justin shook his head no, fervently.  “I want to keep it out of the press for as long as possible, not that I’m afraid she’d tell, but I haven’t told anyone except for who already knows.  I haven’t even told my dad yet, which is probably not a good thing…”

Cassidy was too busy absorbing what he’d said about keeping it from the press to think about anything else that had come out of his mouth.   That thought hadn’t even occurred to her.  The press was going to have a field day when they found out that Justin Timberlake had a long lost son with Jason Brown’s ex-wife.  Before she even realized what she was doing, she’d groaned loudly and obviously.

“I know.  I’m worried about it too,” Justin said, clearly knowing what she was thinking.  “I don’t want my boy pictured in the media either.  We’ll figure it out, okay?  Don’t stress too much yet.”

She nodded.  “I’ll try not to.”

They both heard little movements coming from the backseat then.  Cody was waking up.  “Mommy?” he called out hoarsely. 

She looked back quickly, catching sight of him as he stretched his arms up towards the sky.  “Hello, sleepy head,” she smiled.

“I’m hungry.”

She realized Justin was looking back at Cody as he agreed, “Me too, little man.  Me too.”  The similarities between father and son were appearing more and more, and it seemed to just touch her heart in every way possible.

An hour later Cassidy found herself sitting next to Justin’s mom, Lynn, on a bench at the outskirts of Justin’s own private basketball court, where he and Trace were playing with Cody, lifting him up to shoot and dunk.

It was probably one of the most adorable things she’d ever seen, but she was trying not to look too sappy in front of Justin’s mother.   They’d spoken a little bit, but it was definitely an awkward situation.   Cassidy was feeling slightly uncomfortable even though she got the feeling Lynn was trying very hard to convey the opposite.

“He is such an adorable little boy,” the woman remarked, her eyes focused on the same place as Cassidy’s.  “And he is the spitting image of Justin.  I’ll just feel better once we see the results of the test, though.”  Her head turned Cassidy’s direction then.  “Not that I think you’re lying.  I just don’t want to see my son go through anymore hurt.”

“I understand your concern,” Cassidy told her, keeping one eye on Lynn and one on her son and his daddy.  “But there is absolutely no question in my mind that Justin is Cody’s father.”

Lynn nodded.  Maybe she was agreeing.  Maybe not.   “What about now? Do you have an interest in my son now?”

“Uh…”  Cassidy was dumbstruck.  She’d never expected for the woman to be so outspoken. 

“I just don’t want you to disappear again.  Now that he’s found you and this perfect little boy—”  She sighed quietly.   “He’d be devastated—”

“I wouldn’t do that,” Cassidy said, before Lynn could finish.  “I know I hid Cody from him for all this time.  But what was I supposed to do?  And would he even have believed me back then?  I don’t know.  But those were different circumstances.  Cody needs a father and I’m not trying to keep that from him.”

Two men and one little boy—perched on top of his daddy’s shoulders—were on their way over and the conversation immediately ceased.   “Should we go inside?”  Justin asked.  “Get the dirty work over with?”  He was referring to the test, no doubt.

“Yeah, let’s.”

Justin had noticed the look on his mother’s face from across the court and he knew that whatever she was telling Cassidy was probably something he wouldn’t exactly want her to say.  He figured it was a good time to get the two of them away from each other.  The test was as good as excuse as any.   Besides, the quicker they got the samples, the quicker he could call for it to be picked up and sent to the lab for processing.

It was kind of unbelievable that this was something you could actually do in your own home and not even have to visit a doctor’s office.  It was amazing how far the medical world had come.

They all marched up the short distance to the house.   Cody bouncing on top of Justin’s shoulders.  He was feeling incredible about how the boy was already starting to build a bond with him.  Justin already felt close.  There was just so much he wanted to do and show him.  He couldn’t wait for all their long talks about growing up—school and girls and cars—and girls.   He’d have lots of stuff to share when it came time for that subject.

He probably didn’t realize that he was smiling hugely, but he was.  He let out a deep breath and carefully put Cody back to his feet as Trace opened the back slider.  He was ready to be alone with his boy and his boy’s mommy, but he wasn’t quite sure how to get rid of Trace and his mom.  Maybe he could take Trace aside and tell him.  He’d figure out a way to get his mom to leave too.

But that was kind of chicken shit, wasn’t it?  Maybe he should just tell them both the truth.

“Cassie,” he called her, sticking with the nickname whether she liked it or not.  “Why don’t you and Cody go hang out in the family room.  I’ll be right there.” 

She agreed with a nod and took the little boys hand, disappearing into the room they’d been sitting in before they’d gone outside.   Justin looked over at his mom and then Trace and tilted his head for them to follow him.  They got inside the kitchen and Trace had already read his mind.  “J, I’m going to head out, if you don’t need me anymore.”

Justin shook his head and gave the man a quick wave.   “See ya.”

Trace kissed Justin’s mom sweetly on the cheek and was out the door.

“Momma, I hate to be annoying, but—”

“You want me to go too?”

Justin grinned guiltily. 

“No problem.  I think I’m going catch a flight home tonight.  Seems like you’re handling things on your own just fine now.”

She was right.  He was.  “I am.”

“Don’t mind me then.  I’ll just be out in the guest house packing a bag and hopefully on a flight in a few hours.”

Justin stepped up to her and gave her a hug.  “You didn’t say anything to her that I should know about, did you?”

“I asked if she had an interest in you.”  He stepped back from her with wide eyes.  “I think I caught her off guard.   She didn’t give me an answer.”

Why did he find himself happy that she hadn’t told his mother a straight out no?  “Well, Jesus, what did you expect?”

“I just wanted to make sure she didn’t plan on up and leaving.  I know you’d be devastated.”

“Okay, okay.  I get it.  I’m going back in the other room now.”  He wanted to end the conversation quickly all the sudden.   “Let me know before you leave.”

Three hours later Justin’s mom had gone, the samples for the test had been swabbed, labeled and contained just as instructed and the courier was on its way to pick it up.  Justin sat in the middle of his living room floor with Cody, playing with the huge Lego set he’d bought during his shopping spree earlier that morning.  He’d picked out the whole set for Cody’s age group—a castle with a dragon and knights and all kinds of stuff.  There’d been one of all dinosaurs, but it was for age 7+ so he went with castle and knights one instead.  He’d almost bought both, but changed his mind when he realized he already had a cart full.

He’d put most of the stuff he’d purchased up in one of the many rooms in his oversized home.  It would eventually be Cody’s bedroom.   He already had an appointment with a designer for the following week.  By then he figured it would be safe for someone else to hear about his son.  He was just a little wary that by hiring someone to do Cody’s room, he was opening the door to gossip and press—even more than he was already getting because of the divorce.

It sickened him to think he was going to be dragging his son into such a circus, but there was absolutely no way around it.  If there was, he’d figure it out.  He’d do everything he could to shelter him from his madness of a lifestyle.

Cassidy was sitting on the floor with them, too.   Although she wasn’t helping much with the Lego building.  She was perched with her back against the sofa, mainly just watching and adding her two cents in every now and then.  After they’d finally finished constructing the castle, the dragon and the knight, Justin left Cody alone to play and scooted towards her.  “You getting bored?” he asked.

“Are you kidding?  No way.”

He found himself smiling for the umpteenth time since he’d been around her and their son.  He hadn’t smiled so much in months, maybe even years.  It was sad to think about how long he’d been unhappy and hadn’t even known it.  “That’s good.”

“It’s nice watching the two of you together.   Score with the Lego’s, by the way.”

Justin fell beside her, her body just a touch away.   “You forget that I was a little boy once, too.”

She smiled then, looking right at him.  “No, it’s pretty easy to be reminded of that, seeing you play with him.”

He didn’t think she meant he was childish, but he felt himself wanting to ask anyway.  “Are you trying to say I’m a big kid at heart?” he asked instead.

She shrugged.  “I guess.”

“Is something wrong?  Did my mom say something to upset you earlier?”

She shook her head no.  “Not really.  She is a little more outspoken then I expected, though.”

He chortled softly.  “Yeah, she has a tendency to be that way when it comes to me.  She’s usually very reserved, but then sometimes that bluntness just sneaks right up on ya.  I’m sure she didn’t mean anything to offend you, though.”  He was pretending he had no idea what his mother had said to her when in actuality he knew exactly.  He just wanted to see if she’d tell him or not.

“She didn’t offend me.  She asked if I had any interest in you and it just caught me kind of off guard.”

“Do you?”  He’s said it before he could even think to stop himself. 

The look on her face at his boldness could only be described as surprise.  At least it wasn’t repulsion!  “You’re not any better than she is,” Cassidy spoke gruffly, but softly.  “Honestly, I haven’t really thought about it.”  Well Justin had thought about it, so hearing that was slightly disappointing.  Maybe she read his expression too well, because she continued.  “It’s just—I haven’t even signed my divorce papers and you barely signed yours.”

“I feel the same way completely.”  He put both of his hands up in surrender.

“Obviously I feel some sort of connection with you.   I mean, we have a huge connection sitting right in front of us.”

Justin grinned widely.  “He’s the best thing that’s ever happened to me,” he confessed sappily.

Cassidy was smiling now too.  “He’s pretty great.  I’ll be the first to agree with you on that one.  He’s my whole life.”

But Justin couldn’t help but feel like he wanted to be a part of her life too.  Was that normal—already?

They sat silently for several minutes.  Cassidy’s mind was working overtime and then some.  She did feel an interest in Justin, other than the fact that he was Cody’s father, but it definitely wasn’t something she was ready to admit.   When Lynn had asked her about it, she’d been scared to death that the woman would have read her like an open book and known the answer without hearing a word.  If she had, she didn’t show it. 

And if Justin knew, he didn’t show it either.  But he did give off subtle little hints that he was interested.  But she had to wonder if it was genuine or just because of the circumstances, and that made her extremely wary.  Another reason why she didn’t want to bring her slight amount of interest to his attention.

The most unfortunate part was, of course, that she hadn’t had sex in months and even though he was doing nothing to provoke it, she found herself wanting him profusely.  But her days of one-night-stands were long gone—especially after the outcome of the last one she’d had!  Not that she was afraid of that happening again.  She was definitely on the pill now, even though she didn’t have much need for it.  She’d simply failed to stop taking it after her marriage had fell apart.

But that was beside the point.  She didn’t want to ruin the friendship she and Justin needed to build in order for the whole relationship to work.  They had to make things work for Cody’s sake.  Her son came first before everything.

So on top of everything she was feeling just a tad sexually frustrated.  It was a no win situation.

For some reason her thoughts drifted back to Lynn and she found herself wondering just exactly how much the woman knew about their past encounters.   It had been several minutes since either of them had spoken a word and Cassidy found it rather easy to ask such a thing.  “So how much does your mom know?”

He turned to her, a curious expression across his face.   “About what?”

“Me.  Us.  Five years ago.”

“Oh… that.”  He said it as if he’d forgotten it ever happened, which she knew was definitely not the case.  “Honestly?   More than I’d like her to.”

“Really?  How is that possible?”

His shoulders slumped as he seemed to sink down towards the floor.  “I guess you never heard the song, did you?”

“What song?” 

He huffed.  “That Night.  I wrote a song called That Night.  It was a huge hit about four years ago.”

She was a little nervous about the reference to That Night.   “Justin, I was a little busy four years ago.  I’m sure I probably heard it if it was a big hit, but I don’t know exactly what song you’re talking about and I’m not always good at paying attention to the words of a song.  And for some reason I’m not sure that I want to know now…” she drifted off.

He smirked, maybe a bit nervously.  “My intentions were not bad when I wrote it.  Actually, I was hoping you’d hear it and call.”

“Really?”  Her curiosity was definitely sparked.  “So what did this song say?”

He smirked again.  Definitely nervous, she thought.   “Pretty much everything that happened between us in a suitable-for-radio kind of way.”

Cassidy groaned, loudly.  Suddenly she felt very—embarrassed.   “And your mother’s heard this?”

“Cassie,” he called her again and she wasn’t sure if she liked him using the nickname or not, but she didn’t stop it.  “Everyone’s heard it.  It was probably one of my biggest hits.”

“Oh… my… fucking… God.”

Her curse was quiet, but not so quiet that Justin didn’t hear.  Funny, one little word and he felt this instant lust for her.  It was a very bad thing and he needed to squash it right away.  If it had been acceptable for him to ask her to not use that word ever again, he would have.  “Would it make you feel better if I told you I meant it as a total compliment?”  He didn’t think as much, but it was worth a shot.

Her head shook—a subtle no.  “I am so embarrassed right now.  You have no idea.”

“What happened between us was not a bad thing.  I mean, look at what it produced.”  He was definitely reaching now.

The look she shot him was incredulous to say the least.   “Yes, but I never expected the whole world to know all the details.”

“I can’t help it that you inspired me to such a degree.”  He was doing everything possible to squirm his way out of it, but he had a bad feeling that nothing he could say would help.

In fact, she outright laughed at that one.  “Puh-lease.   Don’t give me that.  You saw an opportunity to market your exploitations and you took it.”

He feigned a gasp of shock.  So what if she’d figured that part of him out completely?  So what?  “I honestly thought you’d hear it and call,” he told her again.

She was laughing now and he was hoping that it was a good thing.  “I cannot believe this.  How am I ever going to look anyone you know in the face?”

“You looked my mom and Trace in the face just fine and they didn’t say anything about it… shit.”  He realized instantly that he’d cursed too loud as Cody immediately looked over.

“Mommy, Justin said the s word,” the boy snitched.

“I know, sweetheart.  Remember, it’s okay for grown ups to say it, but not little kids; and what did I tell you about tattling?”

Cody’s big blue eyes dropped, a look of sadness fell over his perfect little face.  “Sorry.”

“It’s okay.  You’re not in trouble.   Just keep playing, okay?”

He nodded and marched the Lego knight up to the front of the castle.

“Sorry,” Justin whispered.

“Don’t say sorry.  You didn’t do anything.”

Had she forgotten about it already?  “So I’m off the hook then?” he asked, a hopeful grin across his face.

“For that?  No.  I was talking about—" She let out a loud breath of air.  "Oh, damn you, Justin.”  Her head was down, shaking lightly back and forth and there was a huge smile on her face.

Victory had been seized and he was very aware of it.  He patted her knee.  “It’s hard to stay mad at me.  I'm just warning you now.”

She looked up at him, obviously not liking what he'd just said, but not trying to argue either.  “I want to hear this song… but not right now.”

He smirked.  “Whenever you’re ready,” he told her.

“It might take me some time to work up to it,” she said.

He found himself chuckling.  “I understand completely.”

She just shook her head, glared at him and then turned her attention away.   “So what are we doing for dinner, anyway?” 

© BrandyRae 2005

Eight days had passed since the paternity test had been submitted to the lab.  During that week plus one day, quite a few things had happened.  Most importantly—Cassidy signed her divorce papers and Trace’s wife had a beautiful, eight pound baby girl. 

Life seemed to be getting better by the day.  All that was left were the test results and then maybe things would settle into some type of normal.  For five out of the eight days that had passed, Cassidy and Cody had spent them with Justin.  Cody was beginning to get quite attached.  In fact, the day before, Cody had run toward Justin full force and nearly tackled him with a hug.   Cassidy swore she saw tears brimming Justin’s eyes as he squeezed their little boy tight.  The whole scene warmed her heart fully and left her smiling for hours.

It felt like they were a strange little family.  Strange because she and Justin had no relationship together other than that of co-parents.  At least that’s what she kept telling herself.  Sometimes it felt like they were dating, the way he explained to her every little detail of his day or how he made sure to tell her if he wouldn’t be able to see them the next. 

And of course there was the casual flirting.  Cassidy was guilty of it too.  It wasn’t all just on Justin’s end.  But obviously there was an attraction between them.  If there hadn’t been, she wouldn’t have had Cody in the first place!

It was a quarter till ten on Tuesday night and Cody had been down for the count for a good twenty minutes.  She hadn’t seen or heard from Justin all day, but she hadn’t expected any differently.  He’d told her the day before that he had a full schedule—whatever that meant.  She had no idea what he was working on business wise, if he was working on anything.  She didn’t know and she didn’t care.  It wasn’t something they discussed much.

She had just slipped into the comfort of her bed, with its heavenly Down Duvet and Egyptian cotton sheets.  It was her own little slice of paradise.  She turned on the TV to catch the last few minutes of CSI before the ten o’clock news.  That’s when the phone rang.

Normally if a call came through so late, she’d have been instantly worried.  Since her ex-husband didn’t call anymore for obvious reasons—duh, they were divorced and hated each other—her phone never rang past nine o’clock.  But for some reason she just knew that it was Justin.

And she found out instantly she was right as she answered with a casual, “Hello?”

“Cassie, hey.  It’s Justin.”  He’d stopped using her full name completely and it was something she’d never corrected him on, even though she’d never let anyone but her mom and dad call her Cassie before.

“What’s up?” she immediately asked.  “Everything okay?”

“Yeah, great.  Sorry for calling so late.  I didn’t wake the little guy, did I?”

“No, he’s oblivious to the phone.  Once he’s out, he’s out.”

“Good.  So the results came while I was gone today…”

For some reason she had feeling that was the case.  “And?”   Of course she already knew what the test would say.  Justin was it.   If the test said anything differently then she must have been abducted by aliens or something—or more likely they’d just screwed up when they’d prepared it.

“I haven’t opened it yet.  Can I come over?   I wanna do it together.”

She glanced at herself, in her big comfy bed and the words “do it together” resonated in her head—only with a completely different meaning.  But before her better judgment kicked in, she’d already told him yes.  He said he’d be there in twenty.  She got out of bed and threw on a pair of Juicy Couture drawstring pants and a rather snug t-shirt—snug on purpose, of course, even if it was only semi-consciously.

Twenty-five minutes later he was at the door, where she was waiting with it open to bypass the doorbell.  She didn’t think it would wake Cody, but she didn’t want to take a chance either.  The thing was loud and obnoxious, just like the person who’d had it installed.

Justin hopped out of a shiny silver Porsche Boxster—the newest model, of course—holding a thick manila envelope in one hand and a bottle of wine in the other.  “I’m nervous,” he quipped, before making it half way up the three steps that led to her front door.

“You have no reason to be nervous,” she assured him as he stepped inside.  “If the test says you’re not Cody’s father then I was impregnated by either an alien or a ghost, both of which I doubt happened.”

He let out a quiet smirk and she hoped that she’d eased the tension at least a little bit.  Justin took the lead toward the kitchen and Cassidy followed.   He was nervous, she could completely sense it.  It was just silly, but she could understand it.  She guessed she’d be nervous too if it were the other way around.

She eyed him openly as she walked behind him.  He was wearing shorts—long white basketball shorts decorated with two thin red lines going down the outside of each leg.  His t-shirt was rather baggy and on his feet were the latest edition to the Nike line of basketball sneakers. 

He was looking rather athletic and there was no denying that she wanted him very badly.

She swallowed silently as he set the wine and the envelope on the counter.  The last time they’d drank alcohol together they’d ended up having sex—twice.  And it had been damn good sex, by both accounts.  Justin had made it very clear how much he’d enjoyed it.  She’d definitely never forgot what he’d said about her being the best he’d ever had.  And, of course now, as she found herself unbearably horny, all of those wonderful memories were overloading her senses and then some!

He slid the envelope across the counter.  “You open that.  I’ll open the wine.  Where’s the corkscrew?”

She pointed at a column of drawers behind him.  “Second one down.”

He turned to get it and her eyes didn’t leave him for a second.  There was this undeniable tingle hovering in the midst of her chest—attraction, excitement, lust—all of the above?  She could handle it there, but if it started sinking lower, she wouldn’t be quite so confident in her resistance.

“Do you keep wine glasses in here or are they in the bar?” he asked.

“No, I have some in here.”  She moved across to his side of the counter and reached up to one of the higher cabinets. 

She was fairly tall.  She could reach.  But before she had the chance he was bumping her aside.  “Here, I’ll get ‘em.”  She let him, taking a step back and watching his lean frame stretch and grab two of her more casual wine goblets. 

The tingle moved a few inches down, toward her stomach. 

She made sure to divert her eyes as he swiveled around and set the glasses on the center island, still just a step or two away.  He twisted the corkscrew into the top of the wine bottle and said, “Well?  What are you waiting for?”  His eyes fell to the envelope.

“You sure you’re ready?” she asked.

He shot her a dubious look and she decided it was time, not wasting another second and carefully ripping the thing open.  The documents were wordy, not surprisingly, and she scanned over them as quickly as she could, while still managing to watch Justin pour the wine from the corner of her eye.  He was getting more anxious by the second, and making it quite obvious as he now took a rather lengthy sip from his glass.

But she felt it was as good a time as any to mess with him just a little.  It must have been the playful yet borderline horny mood she was in.  She could be downright devilish when she hadn’t gotten any in so long and the answer to all her problems was right in reach, but not quite.  

So she feigned a look of surprise and said, “This can’t be right.”

“What?” he asked nervously.  “What’s it say?”

She turned to him then, keeping the words on the paper up towards her chest.  “It says that there’s a 99 percent chance that—”

“What?”  He was literally cringing.  She could see it.

She grabbed her glass with one hand and took a sip as if the words were too difficult to speak, before setting the glass back down.  “That you’re Cody’s daddy.”  She gasped and brought a hand up to her mouth.  “Oh no.   What are we going to do now?”

But he didn’t find her joke amusing as he had set his glass down, putting a hand to his chest and breathing calmly for a few seconds.  Then he glared at her evilly.  “That was not funny,” he said, snatching the papers out of her grasp.

As he read over them she watched all the concern fade from his features.  When he was finished, he set the report down and let his head fall as he brought his thumb and index finger to the bridge of his nose and pinched.  “I’m sorry,” he looked up with watery eyes.  “I’m just having a little moment here.”

He was choked up.  She’d never seen him like that, and before she could think against it, she’d reached for him and wrapped her arms around him.  He was breathing heavy, his chest heaving against her, and she realized that as intimate as they’d been so long ago, they’d never been intimate like this.  His strong arms around her felt good—too good.

After a moment he pulled back.   The glossiness in his eyes had faded.  “I know you said I had nothing to worry about, but I was,” he explained.  “It’s just—I love that little boy, already, and I need him in my life.”

She smiled whimsically.  “I know that, Justin.  I’m the last person you have to explain that to.”

He shook his head and said, “I feel like such a sap, right now.  Can we go look at him?  I know he’s asleep, but I just need to see him.”

“You can kiss him goodnight if you want,” she told him.  “He won’t wake up.”

His grin widened and before she could blink he was practically skipping out of the kitchen and towards the staircase, which he climbed quickly taking two or three steps at a time.  Cassidy couldn’t wipe the smile away.  Reality was sinking in for her too.  Cody had a father.  A father that loved him immensely in a very short amount of time.  It was then that she realized how happy that made her feel.  Justin was going to be the best daddy in the world.

Now she felt like she was going to cry!

When she met up with Justin, having taken the staircase at a much slower pace, he was kneeling beside Cody’s bed, the boy sound asleep and curled up on his side.  Cassidy stopped just at the door, the light in the hall behind her illuminating the room just enough for her to see.  Justin brushed a hand down Cody’s head and whispered something softly, then he pressed his lips to the boys forehead and stood up.

He had tears in his eyes again as he walked towards her.  “I’m not usually this sensitive, I swear,” he said as Cassidy shut Cody’s door all but a crack.

“Don’t worry.  I won’t tell,” she said.

Justin had this terrible urge to kiss her.  He wasn’t sure if it was because of his extreme jubilation or because she seemed extra flirty tonight—not to mention extra hot—or what.  But he was blocking the stupid feeling in every way possible.  It had just been confirmed that he was indeed Cody’s father, and that was the best news he’d ever remembered receiving.

He hadn’t felt so happy in years—so long he couldn’t even remember.

“Should we go finish our wine?” he asked.  “Maybe make a toast?”

“Sure.”

He followed her slender frame down the stairs and into the kitchen, eyeing her rear the entire time.  It probably wasn’t the smartest move—to ogle her so boldly when he was already fighting urges left and right—but he just couldn’t stop himself.  She looked extra cute in her comfy little pants and tiny little tee.  He really wanted to just scoop her up and carry her right back up the stairs to her bedroom.

Inwardly he sighed as he shoved the thoughts aside once again.  Back inside the kitchen, Cassidy refilled both of their glasses.  “Why don’t we go sit down?”

He nodded—sounded like a good idea—and followed her into the family room, where they usually spent most of their time together.  They sat down on her neutral colored sofa that was way too long for his taste, at least right now it was.   He’d liked to be forced to sit close, not that they were all that far away from each other.  But it still wasn’t close enough for his taste.

He felt himself wondering how come it had been so easy to be so straightforward with her some five years before?  Then he answered the question for himself.  He hadn’t known her then and they’d had no relationship and no ties.  Now they had both and things were slightly more complicated.

She raised her glass and said, “To being parents.”

Justin smiled and repeated it, raising his glass as well.  Then they both took rather lengthy sips.

The room got a little quiet and Justin wasn’t sure exactly what to say.  They usually had Cody close by, rarely were they alone together.  “So we’ll tell him tomorrow?” he asked, thinking of nothing else.

She confirmed it with a nod.   “Yes.  Definitely.”

With a huff, he took another drink of his cabernet before setting the half empty glass on the table.  “So what were you doing before I called, anyway?” It was the first thing that popped into his head.

“Actually?  I had just got into bed and was waiting for the news to come on.  Yeah, not very exciting.”  Why did her answer pain him in the worst way?  Just the mention of her in bed made him ache all over.  And the only thing that could have been more exciting to him at that moment was if she’d told him she’d just crawled into bed naked and had just started to get herself off.   That would have been so exciting he might have keeled over and died.  Luckily that wasn’t the case.

“You don’t sleep in all that, do you?”  He realized he was pushing at boundaries just a little, but he found that he just couldn’t help himself.

The look she gave him was one of curiosity and skepticism.  “No, I don’t sleep fully dressed if that’s what you’re asking,” she told him.  “And why you’re asking I’m not quite sure…” she drifted off.

He smirked and said, “Sorry.  I’m a guy.   I can’t help it sometimes.”

“Yeah, well being that you are a guy, which I’m very aware of, thank you very much.  I should warn you that if you continue with this line of conversation— Well, you should just know that I haven’t had sex in about six months now and—” she paused briefly.  “Why I’m admitting that to you I don’t know.”

“Yeah?  Well, you win.  It’s only been four for me, but that was just a mercy fuck.  Nothing too memorable…”

She let out just a little bit of a snort as she chuckled softly.  “T M I,” she finally told him.

“You asked.”

“No, not really,” she said, taking another big sip of her wine.  He picked up his glass and started drinking too.

“So I guess what we’re both trying to say is that we’re really horny.”

She held up one finger, pointing it towards the sky as her body was twisted in his direction.  “Yes, but not for each other.”

If he wasn’t mistaken, he was already noticing the effects that the wine was having on her and he felt himself smiling very widely.  “Who said that?”

“Me.”

“Why?”

“Because we don’t want to screw anything up for Cody,” she answered.

But really the only thing he could think about screwing at the moment was her.  “I wouldn’t dream of doing that,” he said instead and scooted just a little bit closer.  His chances were looking better all the sudden and desire was overruling all the more cautious thoughts in his head.

“If we have sex tonight,” she continued, “then you’ll end up wanting more and more and pretty soon we’ll be in a full blown relationship and then when that relationship ends, things will be weird between us and Cody might suffer because of it.”  She’d said it all very fast and he found himself trying to contain a fit of giggles that was now stuck in his throat.

“I’ll end up wanting more and more?  What makes you think you won’t want more too?”

She smirked overly confidently—definitely tipsy.  He was enjoying that fact very much.  “Woman have a lot more self control then men do.  Why do you think it’s always the man that cheats?”

He was understanding a little more all the sudden.  Cassidy’s ex-husband had definitely cheated, not that she needed to say it for Justin to know.  He’d known that before he’d heard they were getting divorced.  It was just one of those things you know—guys know.  “Well, I hate to tell you this, but it’s not always the man that cheats.  I have been cheated on more than a few times.”

“I am sorry to hear that,” she said.

He wasn’t sure why, but he took her wine glass away from her then, still a little bit left, and set hers and his both on the table.  She looked at him funny, her chocolaty brown eyes squinting at him with confusion.  “I want you to remember this,” he said softly and then he closed the distance between them and gave into the urge he’d been fighting off all night. 

At first touch, Cassidy wanted to push him away.  But then, as she let his smooth lips sink into her, she realized her resistance had completely vanished and the will to fight was gone.  Besides, the fact that his tongue had now slipped inside her mouth, as she let the kiss turn hard and deep, was a nice added bonus—to say the least.

She should have never told him it had been six freaking months!

But God she wanted him, especially as his body was inching closer and closer, heat radiating off him like a massive bonfire.  That tingle she’d felt earlier had turned into a full blown need and it was now sitting very low in her belly. 

Her hand slipped around to his side and memories shot to her brain of how good his skin had looked, felt, smelled, tasted…

Sensory overload!  There was no stopping it now!

“Justin,” she pulled back just enough to speak.  “I want you.”

He laughed.  “I know,” he said, and brushed his lips over hers delicately.  It was a touch so soft that she almost physically shook in reaction.

She finished, “In my bed.”

The laugh he gave off then was slightly evil.  “I bet you do,” he teased.

“I’m not fucking kidding.”  She had both of her hands braced at his ribs and somehow she’d twisted sideways enough that he was practically right on top of her.  And still she found herself opening up to him even more—as much as possible.

“Damn that turns me on.   Say fuck again,” he urged, his face just a breath away from hers.  His lips close enough to kiss.

“Stop playing with me,” she told him, “and take me to fucking bed.”

He literally groaned at the sound of it.  “Like you’d ever have to ask me twice,” he said, standing up and pulling her with him.  She let him guide her up the stairs, noticing that he did not look at Cody’s door as they passed it.  Something he probably didn’t want to think about at the moment.  She understood, as she didn’t really want to either.

They made it to the safe haven of her bedroom, the TV still playing quietly since she’d never turned it off earlier, and he shut the door.  She walked backwards towards the bed, keeping her eyes on him as she stripped out of her pants. 

“Not wasting any time, are you?” he asked, coming towards her.

Her head shook no.  “What’s the point?”

He shrugged and yanked his shirt over his head.  She did the same with hers and then slipped underneath the mounds of bedding.  The thought of release being within reach was so exciting she almost didn’t even need him there, but then of course the excitement would have been gone and the feeling would have been lost. 

Justin slipped out of his shorts and climbed in bed with her—on top of her.  He looked just as good as he had five years ago—no flab, no pot belly.  Just lean muscle and smooth flesh.  She was afraid that she was so desperate for him at that moment, he wouldn’t even have to touch her to get the job done.

“I don’t think I’ve ever been this hot for someone in my whole fucking life,” she whispered as his body sunk into her, his mouth tasting her neck.

“You are pretty hot,” he agreed throatily.  “You want me more now then you did the last time?”

“Five hundred times more,” she admitted with a shaky gasp as his teeth scraped her flesh.  Then she changed it to “a thousand.”

His smirk was filled with conceit and approval.  His mouth sought her out, meshing with her own as lips and tongues collided in every way possible.  Her hands were all over him—down his back, up his sides, over his chest.  He felt—amazing.  Then he was slipping down the front of her chest, his hands fumbling with the back clasp of her bra.  Finally accomplishing the feat, he tossed it away carelessly, the heat of his mouth at her breast.  She inhaled sharply when he made contact—lips and tongue and teeth.  Her desire was through the roof.  She couldn’t handle it much longer.

Justin was enjoying her thoroughly.  He got the sense that she wanted him to rush, but that was the last thing he planned on doing.  This was something he’d wanted for almost five years—another chance with her.  That was quite a build up.  He wasn’t going to let it turn into anything quick or speedy.  He wanted to take his time and build more memories.

She pushed at his briefs and he shooed her hands away as he pressed moist kisses down the center line of her stomach.   “We are not rushing,” he said, his voice a hum against her.

“Please?  Just fuck me now.  I can’t take it.”

He stopped completely.  The sound of her begging was pretty much unbearable and exhilarating all at the same time.  It wasn’t so bad for his ego either—something she’d done not a whole lot for during their past experience.

Pushing her legs together he sat on her lap and leaned forward until his face was hovering just above hers.  “I seem to remember—”  He stopped himself, deciding not to rub it in her face.  “Never mind.  Tell me what you want.”

“You know what I want.   I want your big fat dick inside me.”  

He groaned, a burst of arousal popping inside his chest.  After hearing such talk, he was almost ready to give it to her.  “What you do to me should be illegal,” he told her instead, before kissing her as hard as he could. 

“I’ll take that as a compliment,” she huffed, her hands reaching around and gripping on to his butt.

“You should.”  He breathed against her, and flipped them both so he was on the bottom.  If she wanted it so desperately—so soon—then she was going to have to take it from him.  For some reason he doubted that would be a problem—if he decided to let her.

And he was right as she instantly began attacking him with her lips, kissing his neck, his shoulders, his chest.  Her teeth scraping at one of his nipples.  He was so hard it hurt.  He couldn’t remember ever feeling so hard.  Bringing both his hands to her slim waist, he slipped them down to her hips, hooking his fingers inside the last little piece of clothing she had on.  “Let’s get rid of these.”

She rose and slithered out of them as gracefully as she could considering he was lying underneath her.  She pulled at his briefs and he scooted and kicked them off.   Then she settled against him, her slick heat throbbing against the root of his desire.  But he wasn’t ready for that yet and he let her know by grabbing her by the hips once more and guiding her up the length of his body until he’d positioned her right over his face.  Then he tasted her sweetness, nearly exploding as she moaned loudly in appreciation.

Cassidy’s knees were instantly weak.  She could only stand it for a moment.  It was too much for her to handle.  She was already so, so close, but when he touched her with those magnificent lips and that sensuous tongue, she had to do everything in her power to keep from bursting.

With shaky hands she reached for the headboard, knowing if she didn’t that her body would collapse.  She wanted to enjoy it for just another moment, because it was something he did incredibly well—too well, in fact.

She let out a rather vocal moan as the spring of arousal tightened and tightened.  Finally she pulled herself away from him, breathing heavily, her body trembling with need as she crawled backwards down his body until they were looking eye to eye.   He had the sexiest grin playing at his lips and she predicted that he was about ready to make some type of playful comment.

But he didn’t.  Instead he brought a hand to her jaw and brushed a thumb across her cheek, staring her straight in the eye.  He used his strength to out maneuver her, pushing her onto her back once more.  Above her, he braced his arms on either side of her body and dipped in for a gentle kiss.  Then he let their bodies touch just enough to torture her.  “This is something I’ve wanted for a really long time.”  His words were quiet, a hush above a whisper.  Then with one swift push he was inside her and she was reminded instantly how perfectly he fit.

It wasn’t long before she was gasping for breath, receiving each jolt of pleasure with a cry or a moan or a whimper—his name falling from her lips with weighted breaths.   His lips touched her cheek, her neck, her shoulder—as he continued with perfectly timed strokes, matching her body beautifully.  She felt something she hadn’t felt so many years before.

She felt a connection.

She cried out at as she finally peaked, probably louder than she should have, but she didn’t care.  She trembled and shook—her chest weighted without enough air, the rest of her completely spent.  The waves slowly calmed as he stroked her head and nestled his face in close beside hers.

All she could do was concentrate on breathing—and the fact that it felt really good with him touching her in every way possible.  She felt herself holding on to him for dear life and she wasn’t sure why.

He must’ve have realized how serious it all felt, as he let out a heavy breath of air and lifted off her enough for her to breath more easily.  He grinned wide when he brought his sight to hers—handsome and sincere.  “I feel better,” he stated simply.

She caught the contagiousness of his grin.  “Me too.”

A quiet chuckle fell from his voice.  “You gonna fall asleep now?  ‘Cause now that I know how you operate, I think I’d take it more as a compliment this time.”

“I think I need a snack.   Then I need you one more time.  Then I’m going to sleep better than I have in months,” she stressed the last part.

He kissed her cheek and rolled away.  “I can handle that.”

But inside she wasn’t as sure that she could.

© BrandyRae 2005

Before he could think to do anything else, Justin rolled off the mattress with a thump, landing unforgivingly on the hard wood floor.  He groaned quietly, rubbing his hip with one hand and reaching for his underwear with the other.  The rest of his clothes were scattered all over the place and, as he now heard the quiet creak of the door, he knew he couldn’t get them.  He just hoped that Cody didn’t come around to his side of the bed.

Her voice came before his little boy’s.  “Morning, baby,” she spoke hoarsely, groggily.  Justin wondered if she had any clue that he’d practically fell out of bed and was now hiding on the floor next to it. 

“Hi mommy,” Cody’s gruff little voice sounded.

She kissed him loud enough for Justin to hear it.  “Why don’t you go downstairs and turn on your cartoons in the kitchen.  I’ll be down in a minute and fix you something to eat.”   Cody had his own small little table in a more kid-friendly corner in the kitchen and there was a small TV built into one of the walls, probably a lot easier for him to operate.  Now Justin understood why.

“Okay, mommy.”   The pad of his footsteps seemed quieter this time.

“Shut mommy’s door, please? 

The door slammed, but Justin doubted the boy had meant it on purpose.

“Justin?” she whispered.  “Are you in here?”

“Down here,” he called out, picking himself up off the floor. 

She peeked over at him just as he started to get up.  Giggles instantly fell from her lips.  He just shook his head.  For some reason, it played at his heart to see her smiling and laughing first thing in the morning.  “I know I can be kind of a bed hog,” she started, “but I didn’t kick you out, did I?”

He plopped his butt down on the mess of blankets and sheets, one knee pulled up with him while his other foot was planted on the floor.  “I didn’t want Cody to find me in here, with you.”

“Well, that was good thinking on your part.”  She patted his bare thigh. 

“So now what do we do?”

Cassidy shrugged, the sheet pulled up to her chest as she was just as naked as he’d been when he’d first awoke.   He was still pretty naked, but not completely.  “Did you want to stay for breakfast, or do you feel like you need to sneak out of here?”

Justin wanted to stay for breakfast, but he didn’t want to act inappropriately in front of his son.  “If I stay will he know?”

She shook her head no and pushed her long, messy hair away from her face.  She had this amazing glow to her, and if it wasn’t for the fact that his son was downstairs waiting for breakfast, Justin would have taken her for a third time in the past nine hours. “No.  He won’t think much of it.  I’m sure he’ll be very happy to have breakfast with his daddy.”

Why’d she have to go and throw that in there?  Now he was smiling—wide.  “I’ll stay.  I’ll stay,” he said, as if he’d had any plans not to.  “Do you think I could take a quick shower, though?”

“Yeah, go ahead.  Help yourself.”

“Cool.”

She rose out of the sheets then, her bare frame waltzing across the room completely uninhibited as she disappeared into a rather large walk-in closet.  He was still sitting there when she came out a few minutes later fully dressed in a clean pair of pale pink sweats and a matching zip-up hoodie.  Fuzzy black slippers covered her feet. 

He felt himself chuckling softly to himself as she strode right past him towards the vanity.  She turned back to look at him.  “Go ahead.”  She pointed behind her.  “Everything’s in there already.”

“Do you need to use it first?” 

She pointed to the right and said “bathroom,” then to the left and said “shower.” 

He understood.  They were separate.  He hopped up, grabbed his clothes off the floor wishing he had some clean ones, and headed off to the left.

Cassidy finished tying back her hair and cleaning herself up a bit before she headed downstairs, leaving Justin in the shower.  She felt this weird sense of belonging, having him there.  She hated to think it, but she’d slept better with him in her bed then she could remember ever sleeping.  And the scary part—she didn’t think it was just because of the sex.  The sex had been great—no doubt about that.  Better than ever, in fact.  And she’d definitely needed it.  No question there! 

If there was such a thing as finding your perfect mate in the bedroom, then Justin had to be hers because the things that happened when they connected were like nothing else she’d ever experienced.  She knew, regardless of the warnings going off in her head, that they’d wind up in bed again—probably several more times.  She just couldn’t say no.  She enjoyed it too much.

Of course she wondered if it were possible for them to have a real relationship, and maybe, even—to live happily ever after.  But Cassidy hadn’t decided if she believed in happily ever after.  Sure, once in a while life worked out that way.  Just look at her parents.  They were a prime example of a successful marriage.  But her experiences so far in the relationship department definitely hadn’t turned out all that well.  Justin was a man, and as far as she knew he wasn’t any different than all the others. He was sure to screw up—or around—sometime.

The last thing she wanted to deal with was another heartache.

Not that she felt all that broken up over Jason any longer.  Honestly, the minute he’d laid that one blow to her cheek, she’d completely fallen out of love with the man.  Anger had stepped in where love had once been.  Now she found herself wondering how she’d ever loved him in the first place. 

And why was it that everyone had known he was the world’s biggest asshole—except for her? 

She shook away the thought as she found Cody sitting at his table in the kitchen, watching Playhouse Disney on the 19” TV in the wall close by.  With a grin, she stopped to plant a kiss to the top of his head as she passed.  “Justin’s here for breakfast,” she told him.

“He is?” Cody asked.

“Yeah.  He’ll be in, in a minute.  I’m going to make your favorite—blueberry pancakes!”

“Mmmmm,” the boy sounded.  “I’m starving!”

“Good,” she chuckled.   “Justin and I have something important to tell you today.”

“Okay,” he said, his concentration more on cartoons than anything else.

“You like Justin, don’t you, sweetheart?”

“Yeah, he’s fun.   I like him,” the boy answered simply.

Cassidy chuckled, she wasn’t sure why she expected to get anymore than that out of a four year old.

By the time Justin made it into the kitchen, she’d had the batter mixed and the griddle hot.  She watched him strut into the room and tried not to think about all the things they’d done to each other the night before.  It was a difficult task.  All it took was one night of amazing sex and just glancing at him affected her in a totally different way.

The more she tried to figure it all out, the more she realized that she had absolutely no idea how she felt about it.  Cassidy had never been shy when it came to sex—obviously.  And she wasn’t afraid of having it just for the sake of having it.  But she’d felt something else with him the night before.  Something that she liked a little too much. 

They had a son together and she didn’t want Cody to miss out on anything about having a father just because she felt herself getting emotionally attached.  But then there was that part of her brain that simply wanted to rationalize it all—to make it all okay just so she could keep feeling this amazing thing she was feeling.

Normally when people have a child together, they have a relationship.  So why would something like that with Justin be so out of the question?

She decided it was too early in the morning to think so deeply.  She’d barely taken two sips of her first cup of coffee!

After a brief conversation with Cody—something about “what’cha watchin’” and a quick explanation on Cody’s part—Justin sauntered over to where she was manning the stove.  “I don’t know about you, but I worked up quite an appetite last night.  I’m starving.”

She found herself grinning at his quiet words.  He’d made sure to say them softly so Cody wouldn’t hear, not that she was worried he’d pick up on their meaning.  “I am pretty hungry,” she admitted.  “I usually don’t even eat in the morning, but—” she lowered her voice—“I don’t usually have sex for three hours the night before, either.”

Now he was smiling.  He patted his chest proudly.  “Next time we’ll shoot for four.”

“You think there’ll be a next time?” she asked with a sly smirk.

Confidence seeped from every pore of his freshly showered body.  “I don’t think.  I know.”

She shook her head at his arrogance and turned her attention to the pancakes.  She couldn’t bare to bolster his arrogance anymore by letting him know that he was right.  “Would you mind getting the syrup out of the pantry?” she asked him after a second.  “Top shelf on the right.”

He did as instructed, disappearing into the walk-in storage space where Cassidy kept all her dry goods.  He came back a second later and set Mrs. Butterworth on the counter.  “So, you are going to completely wonder why I’m asking this,” he started, and she was already wondering.  “But how come you stopped working?  Seemed like you were doing really well there for awhile.”

She had been doing really well—right before she gave it all up because Jason had wanted her to.  It was her last attempt at trying to salvage what little bit of marriage she’d thought she’d had left.  Of course that was before she’d got the confirmation that he was a lying, cheating snake. 

Her eyes rolled automatically.   She didn’t want to answer.  She didn’t want to admit that she’d given up her career—something she’d been so adamant about not doing—for the sake of a man.   But she also felt this weird sense of openness with Justin.  She didn’t have a reason to hide anything from him.  She hadn’t forgot how much his words had helped so many years back when she’d confided in him about her screw-up on air.  He’d been the one man to give her support and encouragement, instead of giving her a bus load of shit like all the other ones she’d known.  Funny, it was someone she didn’t know that had actually made her feel better. 

The more she thought back about their very short time together, the more she wished she would have picked up the phone and called.  But it was too late for that now.  If she believed in those types of things, she would have to wonder if she was getting a second chance.

Inhaling deeply, she let out a quiet huff of air.  “It was my last failed attempt to try and make my marriage work.  It was stupid, I know.”

“Hey, I didn’t say that,” Justin defended, tossing up his hands.  “If anyone can understand that.  I can.  I tried everything to make my marriage work, but when you talk someone into it in the first place—Well, let’s just say it’s pretty much doomed to begin with.”

“You did not talk her into it.”  Cassidy didn’t believe that for a second.  Who wouldn’t want to marry Justin?

As quickly as that thought had slipped into her head, she was shoving it back out again.

“I did,” he assured, glancing over at Cody as the boy let out the most infectious giggle.  Justin perched himself on one of the barstools and folded his arms on top of the counter.  “I tried to make her want the things that I wanted and then I just ended up resenting her because she didn’t.  Very stupid, I know.”

Cassidy smirked.  “Just have to take it as a learning experience, I guess,” she shrugged unknowingly and swiveled around to flip her pancakes.  “These are almost ready.”

“They smell delicious.”

She looked back at him over her right shoulder.  “Did you want coffee?”  She felt a little rude for not thinking to ask sooner.

“I’ll pass on the coffee.  I’d love a big glass of OJ, though, and then of course milk with my pancakes.”

She was smiling even though she wasn’t letting him see it.  She wiped it away before she turned to answer him.  “Both are in the fridge.  Help yourself.” 

He hopped back down and moved over to the fridge, pulling out the carton of orange juice and the milk.  Cassidy couldn’t help but watch him—how comfortable he seemed, how much he looked like he belonged.

Justin ate his breakfast in complete delight.  Across from him sat his boy—this perfect little miniature version of himself.  And very soon he would know the truth, and Justin hoped Cody would be accepting of it.  He tried to throw himself into the mind of a four year old.  What was important?  Toys, cartoons, your parents… But all his life Cody had really only depended on one person—his mommy.  Justin wanted desperately for Cody to depend on him too.

And the feeling didn’t go completely ignored that there was someone else who he wouldn’t mind depending on him.  He felt like he was sitting down and eating breakfast with his family.  An instant family—no doubt—but his family nevertheless.

He wanted to build a relationship with her.  He knew it was soon, but he couldn’t help it.  She was the mother of his son and it only made sense.  He understood that she was afraid things might go sour, but he wanted to convince her otherwise.

This is exactly what he’d wanted.  This is the part of his life that had been missing.  Besides, he truly, honestly felt something with her.  She was different.  She treated him different.  And he liked that.

Not to mention the amazing sex.   That was a huge plus!

Regardless he knew he couldn’t rush a thing.  First things first, they tell Cody that Justin is his father.  And he was ready whenever she was.

He was just waiting for her cue, whatever it may be.

But it never came, not during breakfast anyway.  Everyone finished and Cody asked if he could go play in his room. 

Cassidy nodded yes and told him she’d be up in a few minutes to help him get dressed.  The little boy scurried out of the room and Cassidy rose from the table, gathering the dirty dishes.  “He can dress himself,” she said, “But not usually in anything I want him to be seen in.”

Justin grabbed what he could and followed her to the sink.  “When are we going to tell him.”

She sighed and turned to face him, her hands now empty.  “I know, we should’ve done it then, I just don’t know what to say.”

He was trying his best to understand.  He didn’t know exactly what to say either.  But he realized it wasn’t just that, she was nervous.  This was big news—very big news.

Not thinking twice, he reached for her hand and gave it a reassuring squeeze.  “Maybe we shouldn’t try to think too much about it.  We should just be as clear and to the point as possible.  He is only four years old and his reaction probably won’t be anything like we think.”

“You have a point.  Let’s just go get it done, shall we?”

He smiled and she kept his hand as she led the way out of the kitchen and up the stairs.  He liked holding her hand, he realized.  He liked touching her anywhere he could.  And he didn’t want to hide that feeling.  He hoped he wouldn’t have to for very long.

Cody’s door was open, but Cassidy knocked anyway as she dropped Justin’s hand.  “Hi baby,” she said as he looked up from his rather large, heaping, oak toy box.  He came up with a plastic lizard in his hand.  “Remember I told you that Justin and I have something important to tell you today?”

Cody nodded.

She walked towards his Loft-style bunk bed and sat down, giving Justin the eye to join her.  Dinosaurs decorated the space in bold splashes of green, brown and orange—little boy written all over it.  Everything was kept very clean and very well put together.  One wall was lined with shelves that were filled with books and toys that were for saving and not touching.  There was a small desk, that held a globe and a lamp, but not much of anything else.  The furniture was all dark oak—rich in texture and very well built.  Cody was taken very good care of, but Justin had known that all along.

He sat down on the bed, giving enough space for Cody to scoot in between them, which he was working into at the moment.   “Remember when I told you that someday you’d get to meet your daddy?” she said.  “When you asked my why Bryant has a daddy and you don’t?”

Justin assumed Bryant was one of Cody’s friends.

“Well,”  she continued.  “Justin is your daddy.”

Without much of a reaction, Cody turned his head to look at Justin.  “Bryant asked me what my daddy does,” the little boy explained, “and I told him I didn’t think that I had a daddy.  Then mommy said I do and that I’d get to meet him when I was bigger.” He sucked in a quick breath.   “If you’re my daddy then what do you do so I can tell Bryant.”

Justin was slightly flabbergasted by the rush of words that had just shot from his son’s mouth.  “What do I do?” he asked, trying to absorb it all.

Cody nodded.  It was obvious that this was a very serious matter to him.   “Bryant’s daddy is a nerosturgen.” 

Behind Cody, Cassidy was grinning while she interpreted “neurosurgeon.”

Justin grinned.  “Gosh, that’s tough competition.  Sounds like Bryant’s daddy is pretty important.”

Cody nodded his head again.   “He does sturgeries and stuff.  Do you do any sturgeries, Justin?”

Justin was too busy loving the fact that his son was adding an extra letter to the word and sounding completely adorable because of it.  “Sorry bud, I don’t do any surgeries.”

The boys head dropped.  “Oh.”

“But I make movies and I sing on stage in front of lots of people.”  He tried to make it sound as exciting as possible.

Cody didn’t say anything and Justin was trying not to let his feelings be hurt over the fact that Cody was obviously disappointed over his profession. 

“You can come with me, sometime,” he continued, trying to think of something that would make him sound more exciting.  “Sometimes I even get to sing at basketball games and football games.”

The boys eyes perked up.   “Really?”

Finally.  Something!  “Yep.”

“Cool.”  His attention was completely focused on Justin, almost as if he’d forgot his mother was even there.  “So do I call you Justin or daddy?"

Justin smirked.  “Whatever you want, bud.  I’d like it if you called me daddy, if you want to.  I understand if you’re not ready to yet.”

“Okay.”  Cody accepted the whole thing with a crooked grin—a Timberlake grin.  Then he climbed into Justin’s lap and wrapped his arms around him, burying his cheek into Justin’s chest.  “I’ve been wanting a daddy for a long time,” he said after a quiet moment.  “It’s okay if you don’t do sturgeries.”   

Justin patted Cody’s back, choking back all the emotions that were desperately trying to surface.  He didn’t say a word simply because he couldn’t.   He just squeezed that little boy as tight as possible.  He was experiencing the sweetest moment of his life and he felt absolutely amazing inside. 

“Dad… guess what?   I have a little boy!…  Hey pops, guess what?  You’re a grandpa!…  Dad, I have some news.  I have a four year old son.  Congratulations!   You’re a grandpa!”  Justin had tried every combination of words possible.  He still felt nervous about telling his dad the news.  He wasn’t sure why.  His dad would be accepting no matter what.  And honestly, they weren’t all that close.  They were, but they weren’t.  His mom and dad had divorced when he was too little to remember, and even though they’d kept a pretty good relationship, the bond he shared with his dad was nothing compared to the one he shared with his mom.

But still, it was big news and his father’s opinion was important to him.  He needed to just get it over with—get it done.

Besides, he was picking up Cassidy and Cody in an hour and he needed to do it before then.  He couldn’t put it off any longer.  He felt this huge relief now that everything had been confirmed and Cody knew the truth.  He felt free.   He felt happy.

Happier then he’d been in forever—it seemed.  Life had brought him something to look forward to.  He hadn’t felt that way in ages.

He’d left shortly after they’d given Cody the news that morning, although he honestly could have stayed all day and been perfectly fine.  But that might have been pushing it just a little.  So he’d told her he’d had stuff to do, said goodbye to Cody and went home.  Then he called Trace, told him the good news and asked if it would be okay to stop by and see the baby.

It was and he did, staying for a couple hours longer than he probably should have.  Then he went to the gym and worked out for about an hour.  He came back home, took another shower, called Cassidy to see if her and Cody wanted to go do something, and now he was pacing back and forth in his bedroom—from the bathroom to the closet, which were on opposite sides of the room.

Tired of procrastinating, he paced his last line and detoured for the phone beside his bed.  But before he picked it up, it rang.  “I hate it when that happens,” he whispered softly to himself right before answering “Hello?”

“Justin, it’s Dad.”

He hated it even more when that happened.  But he didn’t think it was some sixth sense or anything.  He knew better.  His mom must’ve called.  “Dad.  Hi.  I was just picking up the phone to call you.”

“I haven’t heard from you in almost two weeks.  Everything okay?”

“Everything’s great.   Have you talked to mom lately?” He decided to fish around first and figure out exactly how much his father knew.

“About 30 minutes ago.   She said I should give you a call.”

Figures.  “Did she give you a reason why?”

“Nope, just said to call.   So stop beating around the bush and just come out with whatever it is that you need to tell me.”

Justin huffed before he started.  “Well, I have some big news—good news.”

“Okay…”

“Dad…” He took in a deep breath.  “I found out nine days ago that I have a four year old son and, yes, I took a paternity test and the results came back yesterday and there’s no question, he is mine.  His name is Cody, he looks just like me and I am pretty positive that he is the best thing that has ever happened to me.”

The line was very quiet, except for what Justin was guessing were very deep, calming breaths on his Dad’s part.   “Who’s the woman?” he finally asked.

“Um, a woman I had a very brief relationship with—well—almost five years ago, now.”

“Brief?  How brief?”  He knew exactly what his Dad was getting at.  So what?  He’d had a few one night stands.  Okay, more like several.  But so what?

“Less than 24 hours brief.”

“Son…”

“Dad, don’t lecture me about that.  It was a long time ago and don’t try to tell me that you never knew those types of things happened.   I mean, come on.”

“I didn’t say that.   But you should at least have been careful enough not to—” He broke off and then came back a few seconds later.  “There aren’t others out there, are there?”

“Dad… no.”

“That you know of.”

“Please don’t ruin this for me.  He is the most perfect little boy and I love him already.”

“Well, I’m happy for you son.  I know how badly you wanted to start a family.  Not sure this was the way to go about it, but everything happens for a reason, I guess…”

“Exactly,” Justin quipped.  “I think it was just meant to be.  This little boy has totally changed my life.  I can’t wait for you to meet him.  Maybe we’ll be out soon.  Of course I’ll have to talk to Cassidy about it, but I’m sure we can work something—”   He was totally rambling.

“Cassidy, that’s her name?  Is she a celebrity or just some random fan?”

“Neither, really.  Actually, she just—She’s divorced, too.  Recently.  She was married to Jason Brown, the quarterback for the Denver Broncos.  But um, before that, she was a sportscaster.  You’ve probably seen her on ESPN.  But that’s not how we met.  It was just sort of a random thing, but she’s not what I would categorize as a fan.”   He didn’t really want to go into anymore detail than that.

“So this woman is not just after huge child support payments?” He asked.  “Because that was my next question.  How come you are just now finding this out?”

He realized he was going to have to explain every detail before his dad was satisfied.  Plopping down on his bed, he started at the beginning nine days before—the basketball game.  And he realized what a whirlwind nine days it had been.

© BrandyRae 2005

Cassidy and Cody waited for Justin as he pulled his SUV up the drive.  She’d seen him coming on the security camera and she’d given him the security pass code already so there was no need to buzz him in.  She’d been watching for him.  She wasn’t going to lie.

He’d told her on the phone that he’d picked up a booster for Cody so she didn’t need to grab the one out of her car.  She wasn’t sure what their plans were, but she’d just got off the phone with her mom and the hints had been fairly strong that they were eager to meet Justin.

She was going to talk to him about it in the car.  Maybe they could just get it out of the way and take the short drive today. 

Cody was excited, but for different reasons.  After Justin had left the boy had bombarded her with questions.  He was anxious to tell all his friends from Preschool that he finally met his daddy.   He only went twice a week, but that’s all it would take for the word to spread.  Cassidy was very aware that it wouldn’t be long till her son was pictured all over the tabloids.   She wasn’t sure if she should try to stop it, or just say to hell with it.

How can you stop something that’s going to happen no matter what you do? 

Cody gripped a toy truck in one hand.  Cassidy held onto the other.  “Come on,” she told him as Justin’s late model Escalade came to a complete stop.  She walked her little boy around to the passenger side and helped him climb in and then buckle his seatbelt.  Then she slid into the front.  “Where are we going?” she immediately asked.

“Why?  Did you have something you needed to do?”

“I am getting a lot of pressure from my parents.  They want to meet you.”

“Daddy Justin…”   A smile eased over Justin’s lips as he turned his attention back to Cody at the sound of his voice.  “When we have Show and Tell next time at school, will you come so I can show everyone my daddy?”

Cassidy was grinning.  This was one of the conversations they’d had earlier.   But how could she deny her son what he wanted so badly?  To show off his new daddy.  Even if it did mean the entire school would be buzzing with gossip afterwards.

“Of course,” he answered, a twinkle in his eye as his sight exchanged with Cassidy’s.  “You just let me know when, okay?”

“Okay,” the boy said.   “Mommy said I go on Tuesdays and Wednesdays.”

She found herself shaking her head lightly, leaning back against the leather seat.  She had her eyes closed, but she didn’t need to be looking to know the look that was on Cody’s face at the moment.

Honestly, she felt like Cody had no idea what a daddy is.  And of course she felt like that was all her fault. To Cody, a daddy was just someone to brag about with the other kids at school.  Apparently there was a lot of that going on.

“Well, I’m sure your mommy will let me know when you have Show and Tell next time,” Justin finished and the car began to move.

Slowly Cassidy opened her eyes and looked over at him, without turning her head.  “He’s been full of questions ever since you left,” she said quietly.

Reaching for the radio, Justin turned it up a little.  Music created great background noise to filter out adult conversation.  “Like what?”

“Oh everything imaginable.”  She turned towards him then and before she even realized what she was doing she was reaching for his hand for support.  “I feel horrible.  I think he has no idea what a daddy is.”

His hand twisted to get a better hold, his thumb tracing over hers.  “Don’t worry.  He’ll learn.   I’ll show him,” he said, with a rather large grin.

She took her hand back once she realized how easy it would have been to keep it there.  “So, about my parents?  Do you think we could go by there today?  Or did you have something planned already?”

His expression turned into something uneasy.  “I don’t think I’m ready,” he admitted.

“I promise they’ll be nice.  I’d like to just get it over with.  My parents are actually quite pleasant.  I’m sure you’ll get along with them just fine.”

“Yeah?” he asked.   “Tell me about them.”

“Well,” she started with a loud breath.  “I’ve told you about my dad a little already.  Both of my parents are retired and they pretty much spend all their time golfing…”

“Really?” he perked up at that.  “I am a big golfer.”

“You are?”  Cassidy had no idea.

“Yeah.  Like, in a perfect world I play at least a few times a week.   Of course a lot of time I’m too busy for that…”

“Wow, I did not know that.   I golf too.  I mean, it was kind of a requirement if I didn’t want to be disowned.”

“See,” Justin grinned.  “We have a lot more in common then you realized.”

No actually, she realized that they had very much in common.  She seemed to learn more things everyday.  “Yeah, I’m actually pretty good too.”

“Ooh, I smell a competition here…”

She thought he might.  One more thing they had in common.  When it came to sports, Cassidy was very competitive.  “Anyway, my parents are, you know, very prim and proper.  But they are also a lot of fun.  I had the picture perfect childhood.  I don’t know.   You’ll just have to meet them.”

With that wide grin on his face, he turned towards her once more.  “So how do I get there?” 

Ten minutes on the freeway and Cody was sound asleep.  Justin was beginning to realize that it was a normal occurrence for him while in the car.  Things had been quiet for awhile.  One of the local radio stations played at a decent volume, filling the air with something besides silence.  Every so often he’d catch her stealing casual glances at him.  Of course the only reason he caught them was because he was doing the same thing.  

When she’d grabbed his hand earlier, he’d felt like he wanted to hang onto it and never let it go.  Of course, that didn’t happen.  He wanted to say something about how he was feeling, but he wasn’t sure exactly what.  He wondered if they had a chance to replay what had happened the night before, but he was afraid if he just came right out and asked that he’d blow it for sure.

He didn’t know what he wanted.  He was filled with so many new emotions.  He didn’t know what was what.  The one thing he knew for sure, was he liked having her attention and he’d do whatever it took to get it and keep it.

Two more songs played from beginning to end and neither of them said a word.  He looked over at her again.  A casual half-sleeved, open, black sweatshirt covered her upper half with a tight white cotton shirt underneath.  She wore light colored khakis that were just the right fit, and on her feet were simple black Flojos—her toes painted a deep, dark red.  She was a damn fine mommy, he thought, with a smirk that he didn’t mean to let out.

Her eyes caught him and it was too late to pretend he hadn’t been looking at her.  Her grin turned into something sly and curious.  “Something I can help you with over there?”  she asked.

If only he could answer the way he really wanted to.  “I think that’s a trick question,” he said, instead.

She smirked this time.  “It’s alright.  You don’t have to pretend that you weren’t checking me out.”

He grinned, completely guilty.   “You so busted me.”

“Well, you’re not so bad to look at yourself,” she winked and turned back to daze out the window.

“Everything okay?” he heard himself asking before he’d thought not to.  “We’re okay, right?  After what happened last night?”

She was grinning when she looked his way again.  “We’re fine,” she told him.  “I’m nervous about this too.  If you really want to know.”

“About me meeting your parents.”

She nodded.

“Well, thanks.    Now I’m nervous, again.”   He’d managed to wipe the feeling aside until she’d brought it up again.

“Sorry.  Want to talk about something else?  To take our minds off it?”  The sound that came from him then was very obvious to the thoughts that had popped into his head.  She giggled lightly—evilly.  “You’re wondering if there will be a replay of last night?” she asked.

He didn’t have to speak to answer.

“Well, I’m not going to try and deny myself.  So, yes… I’m sure there will be.”  She was looking out the window again. 

He wondered what else was on her mind, as she stared outside in a daze.  He didn’t think it was something that she wanted to share, though.  “I would hate for you to deny yourself,” he remarked, reaching across the center of the car and picking up the hand that had been resting on her thigh.  He hooked one finger with one of hers and waited for her to look over. 

Finally she did, looking first at him and then down at where he held her, but she didn’t pull away.  He got the feeling that she was trying to hold back, but not managing it very well.  Maybe she was angry with herself for liking it when he touched her.  Because if there was one thing he knew for sure—she definitely liked his touch.  

“So what do you have planned for later tonight then?” she asked, gleaming at him from the corner of her eye.   He loved the fact that she wasn’t the least bit shy.  She had no problems voicing what she wanted.  He also loved the fact the he knew what she wanted was him, whether she could control that feeling or not.

“I don’t know.   You tell me.”  He stated simply, pulling on her hand and making her reach across the center console instead of him.  He kept all of her fingers now, and placed both their hands on his leg, hers on the bottom.  She didn’t argue in the slightest.

“I think I’d rather show you,” she finally said, “after Cody goes to bed, of course.”

And just like that, he was on his way to meet her mother and father, and he was completely hot from head to toe.  It was a terrible state she’d put him in.  Just terrible.

Cody was still asleep when Justin parked the car in her parents driveway.  He met up with Cassidy as she was unbuckling Cody out of his booster seat.  She was getting ready to pick him up and carry him, but Justin offered instead.  She moved out of the way and Justin scooped up his sleeping little one, shut the door with his foot, and followed her up to the front door, Cody’s head cradled between his shoulder and his neck.   It felt good carrying his little boy.  His smile more than likely told everyone.

It was a well-kept home with an attractive front yard—lush green grass neatly mowed, beds with bark and shrubs in a curvy bordered pattern ran along the top and right side, and stones that were broken in a specifically designated design wound a path from the right side of the driveway to the front entrance.

Her mother was standing in the doorway before they’d reached it.  She was smiling quite wide and Justin was instantly hammered by an older version of Cassidy.  They looked just alike—and it wasn’t a bad thing at all.  Her mother was an attractive woman—in a completely motherly way, of course.

You’d think her welcoming grin would have eased his nerves, but it didn’t.  He never had a problem with moms.  Moms always liked him.  It was her dad that he was worried about and so far there was no sign of him.

The tall brunette kept a quiet voice, saying “come in, come in” as she stepped back so they could step inside.  Justin grinned widely as he held his son snug against his chest, the little boys arms and legs curled around him.  “We can lay him down on the couch.”

They followed Mrs. Nickel into a casual living room where she pointed to a plushy tan sofa.  Carefully Justin leaned down and laid Cody lengthwise across the cushions.  He brushed a hand over the boys forehead before straightening. 

Keeping his grin, he turned straight to Cassidy’s mom and stuck out his hand.  “Nice to meet you, Mrs. Nickel.  I’m Justin.”

She accepted his handshake and said, “Please, call me Connie.”  Then she looked at Cassidy.  “Should we go sit in the kitchen?  Dad’s on the phone.  He’ll be in, in a minute.”

Great, Justin thought, postponing the inevitable. 

They sat down at a round oak table, big enough for six chairs to sit comfortably around it.  Justin thought about pulling one out for Connie, but decided overly-charming could do him more harm than good.  So, like a good boy, he sat down and kept his mouth shut.

“Justin, can I get you something to drink?” Connie asked as she headed towards the refrigerator. 

“Sure,” he answered, but he felt like his stomach was too tied up in knots to actually take anything in.   He knew he’d feel better once her dad appeared.  He just wanted to get that part over.  Maybe the man was making Justin wait on purpose just to prove a point or torture him.

“I’ve got lemonade, Coke, Pepsi, water…”

“Lemonade sounds great,” Justin decided.

“Me too, please,” Cassidy perked up, sneaking Justin a casual glance before focusing her attention on her mom.   She was nervous too and that only made him feel worse.

Connie came to the table with two tall glasses of pink lemonade.  She took a seat and smiled widely.  “You are even better looking in person than on TV,” she commented, looking right at Justin.   It only made him feel even more nervous.

“Mom…” Cassidy remarked warningly.

“Thank you,” Justin grinned.  He wasn’t sure what else to say.  It was always a little uncomfortable when people said things like that to him, but he couldn’t say that he wasn’t used to it.

But he was getting an idea on where Cassidy got her outspoken disposition.

Finally her father appeared.   He was a tall man with a stocky build.   His salt and pepper gray hair was cut fairly short, almost military style, and his skin looked leathery and tan.  Justin stood up to introduce himself and shake his hand.  “It’s nice to finally meet you.  I’m Justin.”

Her father’s handshake was firm in a very done on purpose kind of way—just a little intimidating.  “I’m Brian.  It’s nice to finally meet you, as well.”  Then he nodded for Justin to sit back down and took a seat beside his wife.  They were a very well put together couple.  Justin got the impression that the prim and proper side Cassidy had spoke of came more from her father.  He seemed like a very conservative, traditional kind of man.  Justin could understand that completely as it wasn’t all that far off from how he’d been brought up—in a not so conventional way, of course, because he’d been in the entertainment business for more than half his life and things most definitely hadn’t been normal for him.

Their conversation finally found its niche and tension eased considerably.  When Cody woke up and started talking about how he was hungry, her parents invited them to join them for dinner—out.  On the one hand Justin didn’t want to say no, but so far they had managed to avoid all public places together.  On the other hand, he was about ninety percent sure that he hadn’t been tailed by the paparazzi, so hopefully it would be okay.  As long as the assholes didn’t get a tip from someone at the restaurant before they finished eating.

Brian must have sensed both Justin and Cassidy’s reluctance, as he mentioned a quiet little family owned Mexican place just down the street that served great food.  It sounded safe so they agreed, but took different cars so they could head home afterwards, and make a quick escape if necessary.

When they arrived at the restaurant and he found that it was fairly authentic, Justin felt considerably safer.  Once they got settled, and now that Cody was wide awake after his late afternoon nap, the boy started talking very wordy sentences.  He was explaining in great detail to his grandparents that Justin was his daddy and how he was going to take him to school for Show and Tell.

Once the kid got going, it was hard to get him to stop.  In fact, it wasn’t until their food arrived and Cassidy got a little firm with him about eating, that he stopped talking.  Justin realized he had a lot to learn about being a parent, and not just being a parent but sharing responsibilities as a parent.  Discipline was something they hadn’t really talked about.  So far Cody had been nothing but a little angel.  But as their evening progressed, and Cody grew less and less enthusiastic about staying seated and eating his dinner, Justin was reminded quickly that raising a four year old was a lot of work.

He wasn’t really sure how he fit in.  He felt like he needed to take some sort of initiative on his own, but it wasn’t something they’d talked about and he didn’t want to make the wrong move or try to step in too quickly.  

When he could tell that Cassidy was getting a little frustrated, as she was now bargaining with Cody to just eat “five more bites” and then he could be finished, he leaned into her and asked “How can I help?”

She just shrugged.  “Your guess is as good as mine,” she said.

He looked across the table at her parents, who were trying obviously not to put in their opinions.  “Cody, if you eat those last few bites for mommy, then Grandma has a treat for you when we get outside.”  Connie finally said.

“You do?” Cody perked up, as Cassidy forked a small bite of chicken.

“Here,” she said, and Cody opened his mouth.  “Three more.”  She gave him his fork back.

And just like that, he ate one more bite of rice, one more bite of beans, and one more bite of chicken.

“Don’t be afraid to use bribery,” Connie Nickel said with a wink.

“Thanks mom,” Cassidy sighed.  “He never has a problem eating.  I think he slept too much today.”

It wasn’t long after they were all saying goodbye, Connie giving Cody a Spider-man toy she’d snuck out of the vending machine as his treat.  Talk of a golf game with the four of them came up before they went their separate directions.  Besides the ordeal with Cody, the evening had been rather enjoyable.   

Once they were safely on the road, Justin looked back at Cody—who was playing with his toy truck in the backseat and making “vroom, vroom” noises—and then he glanced at Cassidy, waiting until she gave him her attention.  “The discipline thing,” he said, concentrating on the highway again, “you’re going to have to help me with.  I mean, I want to help, but I don’t want to push it either.”

She nodded her head, agreeing.   “We’re just going to have to work into that.  I’m not sure about it either.”

“Other than that, do you think the night went okay?”

“Yeah, I think so.  Obviously you charmed the pants off my mother—well, just about,” she smirked.

Justin gave her a funny look.   “I wasn’t trying to.”

She patted his knee, but didn’t give him a response.  And the ride was quiet for quite some time after.

When Cody started to get restless and whine, Justin put in a DVD for Cody to watch on the little TV’s built into the back of his headrests.  The boy nearly squealed with delight when the video turned out to be his favorite—Tarzan.  Cassidy was really starting to like this co-parenting thing.   It sure made things a lot easier.

Jason had tried, but he just ended up getting more frustrated than anything.  Justin kept calm and more and more she felt like he was going to be the most wonderful father for Cody that she could have ever dreamed of.

With her little boy engrossed in his movie, and the car quiet dark, she reached over and took Justin’s hand.  She felt like she really needed him at the moment and she didn’t want to push the feeling away.  She wanted to welcome it and embrace it.  She was thankful that he’d walked back into her life and she wasn’t going to deny that in the least bit.

He stole a quick glance at her, smiling wide as he squeezed her fingers tight.  She didn’t need for him to say anything.  His touch said it all.

When they pulled through Cassidy’s security gate, after almost an hour of driving, she instantly knew something wasn’t right.  Something just felt funny and all the sudden her stomach was a little bit uneasy.

Justin pulled up right in front of the house, but he obviously didn’t see the body sitting on her front steps.   Cassidy did.  She saw him right away.

It was Jason.

She looked around for his car and noticed his Harley parked down by the garages.  Stress consumed her in an instant, quicker than she could quietly mutter, “Jason’s here.”

“Here?  Why?” Justin asked with confusion.

Cassidy shrugged.  “I don’t know.”

“Well, I’ll get Cody out.  You go talk to him.”

With a nod she agreed and opened the door, nervously slipping out.  Jason stood up as she walked towards him and Cassidy was enlightened by the fact that besides irritation, she felt absolutely nothing for him.  Last time she’d seen him, which had been more than a month, she had still felt hurt and pain and anger.  Now she didn’t even feel that anymore, and that was definitely a good thing.

“Jason, what are you doing here?”

He slumped a hand into the front pocket of his pressed designer jeans, a gray and black Diesel t-shirt covered his chest and shiny back loafers were on his feet—no doubt imported from Italy, either Salvatore Ferragamo or Bruno Magli.  Jason was all about designer everything.  His dark brown hair was styled perfectly, the glow of the porch light over his head making it shine.  “So it is true?  You’re already shacking up with some other dude?”

As soon as the first word came out of his mouth she could tell he was drunk.  It wasn’t a bad thing.  Unlike most, he turned overly sentimental and sensitive when he’d had too much to drink.  He’d been stone sober the night he’d back handed her right across the cheek.

She wanted to ask why the hell he cared and how the hell he figured it was any of his business, but she didn’t.   “You’re drunk and you were driving your motorcycle.  Are you trying to get yourself killed?” She stood firm with both of her hands braced at her hips.

“Jason!”  Cassidy heard Cody’s voice and the scurry of his feet against the gravel drive.  “Justin is my daddy!” the boy shouted, and Cassidy’s head fell immediately.  This was definitely not what she wanted to deal with.

She felt Justin’s presence beside her.  “I’m sorry,” he whispered.  “I had a hold of his hand, but he got loose and took off.”

“It’s okay.  Can you take him inside?  I’ll be there in a minute.”

He agreed reluctantly.  She knew more than anything he didn’t want to leave her alone.  But this was something she needed to do by herself and Justin had to understand that. 

Jason eyed Justin non-aggressively and said, “How’s it going, man,” with a casual head nod.

Justin didn’t say anything in return, just returned the nod, took Cody’s hand and led him inside the house.

“Justin fucking Timberlake is Cody’s father?” Jason asked, before the door was even completely shut.   Cassidy hoped that Cody hadn’t heard him.

“Yes, and can you keep your voice down so Cody doesn’t hear, please?”  She was stern when she asked.

Jason shook his head.  “No wonder why you never told anyone.”

It was supposed to be a dig and she knew it.  “Fuck you, Jason.  What are you even doing here?  You have some nerve to even come here after you fucked half the country during the last two football seasons.”  Probably farther back than that, but that was before her and didn’t count for much in her defense.

“I just wanted to see if it’s true.  You know, that you’re already fucking someone else.  Are you fucking Justin… again?”  Disdain oozed from the last word, as he was referring to the obvious fact that she and Justin had done it at least once before in order to produce a child.

She shook her head, completely annoyed.  “That is none of your goddamn business and you know it.  We are divorced.  And if you didn’t want it to be that way you should have thought about it before you fucked every fucking groupie that fell at your feet.”  She was keeping her calm even though she really just wanted to scream at the top of her lungs.  “You know what, I’m not going to do this with you right now.  It’s late, I have company and Cody needs to be put to bed.  Sit there,” she pointed to the step.  “Let me call you a cab because you’re not fucking driving.”

It didn’t surprise her when he slumped onto the step and bowed his head.  He was the biggest push over when he was drunk.  The complete opposite of what you’d expect from some big macho football player. 

She took one step past him and pointed down at him.  “I swear to God if you try to leave on that bike while I’m inside, I will call the cops right away and tell them to pull you over for driving under the influence.”

Justin was standing in the doorway between the entry hall and the family room when she went inside.  He had one eye on Cody, who was laying on the floor in front of the TV, and one eye on the door.  Cassidy could sense how unnerving this was for him and she felt bad for him, but it definitely wasn’t anything she had asked for.

“Is he gone?”

“I can’t let him drive, Justin.  He’s fucking five sheets to the wind” –which was even worse than two, she figured.

“Did you want me to give him a ride?”

Her head shot back with surprise.  That was the last thing she’d expected him to say.  “No.   I’m calling him a cab.”

“It’s going to take 45 minutes to an hour for a cab to get here.  I can get him out of here in five.”

“Do you realize how awkward that will be?” she asked.

He looked back at Cody before stepping up to her and grabbing both of her hands.  He was close and she liked it.  “I’m not afraid of him, Cassie.”

Her walls were crumbling and she was sure he was perfectly aware of that fact.  “I didn’t say you were.  It’s not that anyway.  He’s a big pussy when he’s drunk.”

Justin snickered and she wanted to kiss the hell out of him, but she didn’t.  He looked completely devilish and attractive and she felt a little warm all the sudden. 

“Alright, fine.  But I can’t guarantee it will be a very pleasant drive and he’s probably going to be full of questions.  He already asked if we were fucking.”

“Yeah, I heard.  He’s not exactly quiet.”  His head fell in towards her, his forehead almost touching against hers.

She sucked in a quick breath, catching the faint aroma of his cologne.  That ball of excitement was back inside her chest and she wanted him to hurry up and leave just so he could get back.  “You will come back, right?”

“Uh, yeah.  Are you fucking kidding?”

A wide grin eased across her lips.  “Good,” she said.  “I’ll try and get Cody to bed while you’re gone.  Give me a quick kiss.”

Naturally he obliged, only it was anything but quick.  It was slow and soft and made her head spin.  His smile was huge when he pulled back.  “I’m going to tell Cody goodnight, then.  You go tell him what’s going on.”

“Yippee,” she remarked sarcastically.  “This is going to be fun.”

A few minutes later she watched the two most serious relationships in her life pull out of the drive.  Jason had been a serious mistake.  She hoped what she had with Justin turned into something seriously amazing and great.

© BrandyRae 2005

Justin was gone a good 45 minutes.  It was the longest 45 minutes of Cassidy’s life.  She was just about to call to make sure everything was okay, when she saw his car pull in, on the closed circuit security channel on the TV. 

She didn’t even try to pretend that she hadn’t been waiting.  She rushed to the front door and waited outside as he pulled up.

When he stepped out, he looked completely aggravated.  Grimacing, she met him half way.  “It didn’t go well?” 

The look he shot her told her plenty.  “He is the most annoying drunk I think I’ve ever encountered, and I’ve encountered quite a few.” 

“Sorry.”

He threw an arm over her shoulders as she turned with him and they walked up towards the house.  “I almost dropped his ass off in the middle of fucking Sunset Boulevard, but out of respect for you, I didn’t.”

“I’m sorry,” she said again, as they stepped inside her home, one at a time.  She went through first and he shut the door behind them and locked it.  Then he grabbed her and pulled her back around and up against his chest.

Her head spun accordingly and she knew she was smiling. 

The tip of his finger dropped to her temple before trailing softly down the side of her face.  “Is Cody asleep?” he asked softly.

She nodded, almost too caught up in his gentle touch to answer.  “For about ten minutes now.  It was a fight, but he finally conked out.”

He grinned, wide and happy.   “So I get you all to myself?” His voice was soft, but in the deepest and sexiest way.  More and more Cassidy was learning that what she felt was something so much more than just sex, and as much as it scared her, she had no desire to push it away.   It felt too damn good to try and stop whatever was happening between them.

“Definitely.”  She reached up that slight distance for a kiss, one that she felt like she’d been waiting for forever.  And in an instant flash she realized just how hard and how fast she was falling for him.

She wasn’t sure how it could have hit her so quickly, but it had.  And the more she thought about it, the more desperately she wanted him.

Her hands found his chest as the kiss she’d started grew hungrier and deeper.  He touched her waist, his fingers slipping underneath the hem of her top, seeking out her bare skin.  His other hand braced her head, as her neck tilted even farther back and her mouth was completely his for the taking.

He was taking with no problem and she was giving with her everything.

The hand he’d had at her back smoothed down past her hip and to her thigh, where he gently lifted her leg, letting it curl up against him.  Her touch slipped up his neck, to his slightly stubbled jaw, where she reveled in the feel of his rough, completely male skin beneath her fingers.

She’d thought she’d wanted him bad the night before, but it didn’t even compare to what she was feeling now.  Maybe it was because the recent memories reminded her so well of how good he made her feel.  Or maybe it was because she felt something more that she wasn’t trying to deny herself this time.

Either way, it was only minutes later that he was leading her up the stairs without as much as one word, and she was following without any argument.

She didn’t strip out of her clothes the minute they’d set foot in the room.  She fell with him onto the bed and danced the slow dance of making love.  She let the term fill her mind, because in her heart the feeling consumed her.  He took his time—undressing her slowly and kissing her everywhere.  There was no begging, no pleading, no rushing.  No words, just breaths and quiet moans.

When they finally joined, she closed her eyes, letting her body feel every sense of him.  Not just in the physical sense, but emotionally as well.  She listened to his grunts, his groans, his heavy breaths.   She felt the sheen to his taught skin, thanks to the warmth they were creating, as she smoothed her palms up his chest, his neck and around to his back.  He felt strong and sturdy and secure—and she realized it was something she’d never truly felt with a man. 

And just as hit—her entire body tensing as she held onto him so tight, waves of ecstasy crashing in, over and over again—she knew that she was a total goner, and that she planned on doing nothing to stop it.

He came with her, breathing heavy as he murmured how good it felt—how she felt.  She couldn’t speak.  She couldn’t move, other than to accept the last of his slow, sputtering thrusts.  All she could do was think about how amazing he felt inside of her and how much she didn’t want the feeling to end.

She still hadn’t spoken a word as he kissed her cheek and collapsed beside her, letting one of his arms drape over her stomach.  With her eyes closed, she took in long, deep breaths.  She was completely overwhelmed.

“That was amazing,” he whispered, pressing his lips to the side of her head. 

In her mind she agreed, but she didn’t utter one word.  He was still breathing heavy and she liked listening to the quiet inhales and exhales he took.  She liked everything about him—the way he looked, the way he felt, the way he touched, the way he talked, the way he treated Cody.  It was an endless list.

“Everything okay?” he asked, just as she was turning on her side, to meet him face to face.

“Justin—”   Her eyes were open now and staring right into his with a seriousness she could feel in her expression.  “I’m falling for you—hard.”

His smile should have told her everything, as it was gigantic and happy and proud.  He brought a hand up, brushing her mess of hair out of her face, letting the back of his fingers dance lightly against her flesh.  “Don’t be afraid, okay?”  He said it as if he had read every single thought in her mind.  “I know we’re both fresh out of really bad relationships, but we’ll take it slow.  One day at a time.   Okay?”

She nodded, not exactly sure if that meant he was feeling the same, but wanting to hope that it did. 

He was still grinning as his touch smoothed up, over her forehead.  “I’m not a scary guy.  Really, I’m not.  I promise.”

With a quiet smirk, she let a touch of a grin play at her lips.

“Now, I’m not trying to say that I’m perfect or anything,” he added, “Probably the closest damn thing there is to it,” he winked and she knew he was being playful, “but I’m sure I will piss you off eventually.”

She didn’t know what it all meant.  What was he saying?   Was he saying that he wanted a relationship with her?  Had one already developed right under her nose, without her even realizing it?

The hand he’d had at her head, fell to her shoulder, smoothing down the length of her arm until it reached her fingers, which he locked with his own.  “Are you getting all this?” he asked, “Because you’re not saying much and that is a little scary for me.”

She did smile then, a tiny giggle seeping from her voice.  “I’m getting it,” she said.

“Good, because in case you didn’t interpret the meaning behind all those words I just threw at you—I’m falling for you, too.”

Her heart swelled, just as his mouth came to hers for a kiss.  It felt good to hear that he was feeling the same.

When he pulled back, big smile still on his handsome face, he told her, “I’m glad you said something because after the conversation I just had with your ex-husband—which, by the way, I had to remind him that he was because he kept calling you his wife—well, I was trying to figure out how I was going to ask you if we’re “just fucking,” since that’s how it’s been referred to several times now this evening.”

“I don’t think we are,” she said softly.

“I don’t think we are, either.  I think it’s a lot more than that.”

She closed her eyes, letting it all sink in.  She couldn’t even describe how happy she felt at the moment.  She was tingly from head to toe and for once it wasn’t from the sex.

He kissed her sweetly and patted her hip.  “Do you mind if a take a quick shower?” he asked.

She shook her head no.  “I’m going to change the sheets and then I’ll join you.”

“Why don’t you join me now and we’ll change the sheets together, afterwards.”

She liked that idea.  She liked it very much.

It must have been close to three a.m. when Justin woke up in dire need of something to drink.  He slipped out of bed, away from Cassidy’s sleeping figure, and slipped into the shorts he’d had on earlier.  He didn’t quite feel right walking around in his underwear—yet.

He felt good about their talk—their entire night.  Actually their entire day.  Even the part that involved her ex-husband, because it only confirmed one thing.  Cassidy was definitely over the guy, and as she’d so openly admitted, was falling for Justin—hard.  He loved the fact that she was so open with her feelings.  It made life so much easier. 

He’d been in so many relationships where he had to fight with a woman to get her to tell him what she was feeling—his marriage, for sure.  Communication was so important, and Cassidy had no problems communicating. 

But there was one major thing he needed to talk to her about and it was something he was having a hard time being so open about.  They’d had sex a total of four times in the past two days without using any type of protection.  Yes, it is something he should have thought about before it happened, and it wasn’t like that slight flutter of a thought hadn’t popped into his head.  He’d just chosen to ignore it.  Definitely not the smartest way of thinking, especially since her ex-husband had been a total dog and fucked around on her at a very extreme level.

He was pissed at himself for not talking about with her before, but he really hadn’t thought about that consequence until seeing the guy face to face.  The other consequence—of course, the one that had brought them Cody—didn’t scare him at all.  Justin wanted a decent sized family.  If she accidentally got pregnant again, he’d be happy not scared.

With a huff he opened the fridge and pulled out a bottle of water, drinking the entire thing.  When he turned to throw it in the trash and head back, she was standing right behind him and it just about scared the shit out of him as he jumped about a foot backwards.

She laughed.  “Sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you.”

He shook his head.  “Did I wake you up?”

“Yeah, I was afraid you were sneaking out.”

With a chuckle he wrapped his arms around her, realizing then she was draped in his way-too-big t-shirt.  “And miss breakfast?  Are you crazy?”

“Oh, but it’s your turn to cook breakfast,” she said, her face nuzzled against his bare shoulder.

“I can cook cereal just fine,” he smirked, pressing his nose into the top of her head.  He loved the scent of her shampoo, it was sweet and made him feel like he was in a flower garden.

She giggled and pressed her lips into the crook of his neck.  “Come on,” she said, “come back to bed.”

During the trip upstairs Justin kept thinking about how he could bring it up.  How could he ask something of such a nature?  It was important and he didn’t think she was going to be upset about it.   In fact, he was sure she was going to tell him he had nothing to worry about because he couldn’t imagine her putting him at risk.   He just couldn’t.

When they got back into bed, and she curled up against his side, cozying up next to him, he knew he couldn’t put it off any longer.  She kissed his chest and the feeling to talk only grew stronger. 

He brushed a hand down the back of her head.  “There’s something I need to talk to you about,” he said.

She looked up at him, her chin weighted against his flesh.  “Okay…”

He could tell he’d already worried her.  “This is kind of hard for me to say, but I need peace of mind.”

“I’m on the pill and I’m not lying about it this time,” she said.

He smirked because that was part of it, but not all of it, and also because he realized how good they were getting at reading each other’s thoughts.  “That’s not just it,” he said.

“That was part of it.   So what else?”

“Your ex.  He cheated—a lot.  I mean, should I be worried about—”

She sat up, Indian style, and looked down at him.  “Justin, no.   Do you think I would put you in that type of situation?”

“No, of course not.   But it’s my health and that’s important to me.”

She nodded, completely understanding just like he knew she would be.  “Okay, ignore how stupid this is going to make me sound.”

“Baby, I don’t care what you tell me, I would never think that you’re stupid.”

She grinned and he didn’t know if it was because of what he’d said or because of how he’d said it.  “The last person I had sex with without a condom, was you.”

He looked at her kind of funny.   “But—”

She put up a hand to shush him.   “Remember, no judgment,” she said.  “Look, I know it should be a very big sign, when your husband refuses to have sex without a condom, that he’s probably screwing around, but he gave me some lame excuse about how it made him last longer and I bought it.  For awhile, anyway.  Obviously when other signs started appearing I got more and more suspicious.  But even still, since then I’ve been checked out and tested four times.  Because, yes, my health is important to me, too.”

Justin just shook his head.   “What an asshole.”

“Yeah, no fucking kidding.”

He hated that he’d brought it up, but it was something he was glad that they’d talked about.  Tugging on her arm, he pulled her back down beside him.  “Well, you’re going to not believe this, but—” he smirked at the coincidence because it was almost too much to believe—“I haven’t had sex without a condom either, since you.”

“You’re trying to make me not feel like such an idiot.  That’s sweet.”  Her hand smoothed down the center of his stomach. 

“No, I’m not.  My ex-wife was paranoid about getting pregnant.  She was on the fucking pill and she still made me wear a condom every single time.”

“Damn, that’s kind of ridiculous.”

“I always thought so.”  He hugged her even closer to him, tightening the arm he’d had curled underneath her.  “She never wanted to have kids—ever.  She wanted me to get fucking fixed.  Then we could stop using condoms.”  He shook his head, thinking about what a frigid bitch she’d been to ask that of him.  “I’m fucking 27 years old and she wanted me to have a goddamn vasectomy.”

Her lips pressed into his jaw and then to his neck.  “Sounds like we both picked the cream of the crop,” she voiced with sarcasm.

“God, you’re not kidding,” he turned his head, smiling as his eyes met with hers.  “You want more kids, right?  Eventually?”

Her grin was evident and that pleased him more than he imagined.  “I was an only child and it sucked.  I don’t want Cody to be an only child.”

He kissed her forehead.  “Good.  From now on that’s a prerequisite.  Do you want kids?   Yes?  Okay, check.  Now we can continue with our relationship.”  He felt like he needed to make what he’d asked sound not so serious, because talk of more kids already could have taken their very new relationship to a place it wasn’t ready to go and he was most certainly aware of that.

She giggled and kissed him again, the top of his shoulder this time.  “God, I really like being with you.”

He closed his eyes for a brief moment.  He liked what she’d said.  “I like being with you, too,” he told her.  More than you know, he thought.

“I’m in love with her.”  He knew how sure he was.  Telling someone else—Trace—only confirmed what had been in his head.  He’d left Cassidy’s just before noon, went home, showered again and headed over to Trace’s house without so much as a call first.  When you were as close as they were, calls weren’t always necessary.

“J… you’re infatuated with her.   I mean, of course, you are.  She’s the mother of your son.  She’s hot.  The sex is great.   She’s hot.”

“You said the hot part twice.”  Trace’s wife Lisa walked into the room, carrying her sleeping infant in her arms.  “When do I get to meet this hot woman who’s the mother of your son and gives you great sex?”

Justin chuckled.  He’d always been a bit envious of the relationship Trace and Lisa had, but he didn’t feel that way now and he couldn’t help but think it was because he felt like he was on the brink of something just as great with Cassidy.  “Soon,” he told her.  “You’ve been kind of busy lately.” He eyed the sleeping bundle in her arms.

“True,” she agreed with a grin, as she sank into a cushy leather chair across the family room, carefully maneuvering her feet to rest on the ottoman without disturbing baby Elizabeth.

“Have you told the guys, yet?” Trace asked.

“That I’m in love?”

“No, dumbass.  That you have a four year old son.  Or did you forget that part already?  Jesus, you must be in love.  You’re losing your fucking mind, I think.”

“Did you lose your mind when you first fell in love with me?” Lisa asked, looking straight at Trace, but giving Justin a wink out of the corner of her eye.  Justin knew she was trying to get her husband to lighten up a little.  He loved her for that.

And as Justin gave an immediate “yes” Trace was defending with an obvious “no.”  The woman chuckled quietly and returned her attention to the adoring infant that was cradled against her chest.

“You never answered my question,” Trace probed.

“No, I haven’t told them yet.”

“Don’t you think they should know?  I can imagine how upset Chris or Joey, or even Lance or JC, are going to be when they learn that you’ve known for almost two weeks that you have a four year old son and haven’t bothered to pick up the phone and tell one of them.”

“Better to not tell any of them than just one of them,” Justin reasoned.

“But this is the thing, J—and you know that I am your very best friend in the world and I would never steer you wrong.  It’s going to hit the press soon and it is going to be this huge shock to everyone—your friends, your family, your fans—”

“I did finally tell my dad,” Justin interrupted.

“Yeah?  What’d he say?”

“He was kind of an ass about it.”

“No surprise there,” the man shrugged.  “Anyway, I think you need to cut this thing off at the pass, so to speak.”

Justin had an idea where Trace was going, but he needed to hear it exactly.  “What do you mean?”

“Put out a press release.   Make a statement.”  Then he started spouting something off from the top of his head, “I have recently learned that I have a four year old son and I’m planning on taking full responsibility, etc, etc, etc….”

Justin understood what Trace was saying, but he’d always had a problem about making press statements regarding his personal life.  He hated it.   But sometimes it was necessary, especially if you wanted to put the right spin on it. 

“Call Johnny.  Call Melinda.  Call Jeff Smith.  Let them know what the fuck is going on so they can be prepared and you can go about this the right way before it turns into a complete fucking nightmare.” 

Trace was right and it was the last thing Justin wanted to deal with.  He didn’t want to call all those people, but he had to.

He didn’t say a word, but he didn’t have to as the attention was taken off him, baby Elizabeth letting out a wail of a cry.  Lisa sat up, patting the baby’s back.  “I think it’s feeding time again,” she said, carefully rising to her feet.

“Baby, you can nurse out here.  Justin doesn’t care,” Trace told her.

“It’s okay.  We’re still getting the hang of it,” Lisa explained.  “As much as I am always for showing Justin my boobs, they’re pretty big right now and I wouldn’t want him to get scared,” she teased before disappearing from sight.

Justin just shook his head, a little frightened.  “You wife…” he remarked, not needing to say anything else.

“I know.  She’s one of a kind,” Trace smirked.  “So, you really think you’re in love with her?  Already?”

Justin nodded his head. 

“I guess that means we don’t have to listen to you cry over Macie anymore.”

He smirked at the mention of his ex-wife.  She was the last thing he’d been thinking about.  That was for damn sure.

© BrandyRae 2005

He bowed his head as he shut off the engine of his hefty Cadillac SUV.  He felt instantly guilty and Chris was going to read it a mile away. 

Pushing the feeling aside, he marched over to the man he referred to as his brother and gave him a big hug.  “This yours?” he asked.

Chris shook his head no.   “Just for the day,” he said.

“Well, come on.  Let’s see what it’s got.”

Justin slid into the passenger seat as Chris got behind the wheel.  The engine roared and power vibrated through the black leather seats before Chris even touched the gas.  It was like an instant high, being in such a fine piece of machinery.

And all Justin could think about was how much he wanted to show his son this pretty car.

“Turn it off,” Justin commanded.  “Turn off the car.”

Chris shot him the funniest look, but did it anyway.  “What is with you?” Chris immediately asked.  "I haven’t talked to you in weeks.  You don’t return my calls—anyone’s calls, apparently.  And now you’re acting really strange.  You’re not still fucking depressed, are you?  I know it’s been a rough few months, but Justin, you’ll find someone a lot better than Macie.  You were miserable with her, you just didn’t know it.”

“I know,” He said, rolling down the window for some fresh air.  He felt like he needed it with what he was about to say.  “You’re totally right and to answer your question I’m definitely not still depressed over Macie.”

“Well, that’s good… I guess.”  Chris was confused, that much was obvious.

“Look, a lot has been going on over the past couple of weeks and I feel really guilty because I haven’t told you or any of the other guys.  That’s why I’m acting strange, because I feel guilty.”

“Well, what is it?”

“Almost two weeks ago, now, I found out that I have a four year old son.”

Chris grinned widely, mimicking the Cheshire cat in Disney’s Alice in Wonderland.  “Justin, you didn’t actually fall for that, did you?”

Justin shook his head.  “No.  It’s for real.  I’ve already got the results back from the paternity test and everything.”

“Oh.”  The man was flabbergasted.  It was written all over his round face.  And he was probably a little hurt because he was just finding out about it—that made Justin feel even guiltier.  “I always thought it would be Lance or JC that would wind up with the illegitimate child.”

Justin ignored the humor the man was trying to make out of it.  “I know I should have told you guys and I’m sorry.  I feel really, really bad.  You’re my brothers and I’ve totally been ignoring you guys and—”

“J, stop.  It’s okay.  Just tell me more about this little boy of yours.”

They sat in the car, in Justin’s driveway, for a good 30 minutes.  Justin explained everything, ending with the same thing he’d told Trace just a little while earlier—that he was falling in love with Cassidy, and that he’d never been happier.

Chris’ response to it all was that he wanted to meet them both, right away.  Next thing Justin knew, they were on their way to Cassidy’s, driving down the road in Chris’ rented luxury sports car.

“I should call her and let her know we’re on our way,” Justin remarked, more to himself than to Chris.

“Oh, come on, J.  You’re taking away all the fun if you warn her that we’re coming.”

Justin just shook his head.   “They might not even be home.”

“You’re not calling her.”

Justin shot the man a funny look, but he knew Chris was trying to prove a point.

“She won’t be mad at you for just showing up if she’s as crazy about you as you are about her,” he said after a moment.  “Who’d you say she just divorced?”

“I didn’t,” Justin answered.  He hadn’t told Chris who her ex was.  “What makes you ask?”

“Name sounds familiar.   Cassidy Nickel—something?  Hmmm… I think maybe I’ve met her.”

“Really?” Justin asked curiously.  He knew the name wasn’t familiar because of what had happened with her five years ago because Trace was the only one he’d told her name to.  Well, except security, who’d been with him at the time.

“Yeah, so fess up.  Who’s the ex?”

Justin rolled his eyes without even realizing he was doing it.  “Jason Brown, Denver Broncos quarterback.”

That goofy grin was smeared across Chris’ face again.  “Yes…   Cassidy Nickel-Brown.  Tall, brunette, very nice a—”

Justin stopped him.  “Yes, that’s her.  Apparently you have met,” he said, amazed at how protective he felt over her.

Chris chuckled evilly.  “You do like her,” he teased.

“Shut up, man.  Turn here,” he told him.  They were almost there.

Cassidy was practically knee deep in a pedicure when the obnoxiously loud doorbell rang.  She’d felt like a little pampering after Justin had left earlier in the day so she’d called her manicurist to see if she could make a house call.   Renee had shown up about an hour earlier, started with her nails and was just now working on her feet.  Of course they’d spent the first fifteen minutes chatting, Cassidy trying her best not to mention anything about Cody meeting his father—who just happened to be Justin Timberlake. 

“You want me to get that, sweetie?” she asked.  Renee was typical L.A.  Mid-thirties, long bleached blond hair, fake boobs.  But she was also one of the sweetest women Cassidy knew.  Of course, considering she didn’t really have what could be considered “girlfriends”, that probably didn’t say a whole lot.  Renee was one of the few women Cassidy got along with. 

“Yeah.  I must have hit the button to leave the gate open when I buzzed you in.  I’m not expecting anyone.”

“Well, I’ll shoo them off,” Renee grinned.  “You just keep soaking.”

Cassidy leaned back in the massage chair and closed her eyes.  She’d talked Jason into buying this particular house just because it had it’s own mini salon complete with shampooing sink, styling chair and massaging pedicure seat, which she was reclined in at the moment.  It was also the main reason why she’d wanted to keep the house in the divorce.  The rooms he’d insisted on decorating so horribly could easily be changed.  This was her house and she was glad that she didn’t have to give it up.

Taking in a deep breath, she thought about how relaxing the warm bubbles felt on her toes.  The last thing on her mind was that the person ringing her doorbell was Justin.  Not until she heard Cody shouting, “Daddy Justin!”

“Fuck,” she cursed quietly to herself.  Not that she was unhappy to see him.  But more and more people were finding out and a leak to the press was unavoidable.  She trusted Renee.  She’d been seeing her for almost two years and the woman knew a lot of Cassidy’s history.  But this was going to be a big shocker.

She heard his tranquil voice say, “hey little man,” and she smiled, letting her head fall back and closing her eyes again.  The thought of them together did something amazing to her heart.

“I tried to get rid of them,” Renee’s voice came, clear and close, “But they weren’t going for it.”

“Them?” Cassidy opened her eyes to see Justin, Cody and Chris Kirkpatrick from ‘NSync striding in behind Renee.  “Oh, hi.” She waved one of her freshly manicured hands.

“I’m going to take a short break.  Be back in ten?”  Renee volunteered.

Cassidy nodded, thinking—good idea. 

“Mommy, can I show Daddy Justin the picture I made for him earlier?”  Cody asked eagerly.

“Of course, sweetheart.   You go get it.  Okay?”

The little boy nodded and ran out of the room.  “Don’t run, please!” Cassidy shouted after him.

Justin swooped up on her then, leaning over her chair and kissing her senseless.  She was a little dizzy when he pulled away, but she managed another silly, “Hi,” as she felt a warmth spreading in her cheeks.

He was grinning, watching her as she touched her face with both her hands, like she’d be able to feel if she was red or not.  Her skin was hot—definitely flushed.  Damn.

“That’s a nice shade of red for you,” Justin teased, plopping down on the little stool Renee used.   He winked at her before turning to look back at Chris.  “Come here, dumbass,” he told the man who was still standing in the doorway.

“We met at a Make A Wish benefit,” Chris said to Cassidy, as if he didn’t expect her to remember.

“Of course, I remember.   How have you been?”

“Good,” he grinned.   “Sorry to barge in on you like this.”

“Don’t worry about it,” Cassidy remarked, looking down at herself.  She wasn’t wearing a whole lot, something she hadn’t thought about until just then as she had on a pair of tiny gray sweat shorts and a rather thin white tank.  For some reason she didn’t think either one of them minded a whole lot.

“Chris knows everything,” Justin announced to her.

“Everything?” she asked with a curious grin.

“Everything,” he confirmed.

“Probably more than you,” Chris added.

Justin’s sight shot over to Chris and Cassidy was more curious than ever.  “Interesting,” she smirked.  “So what are you two up to?”

“Chris rented a Ferrari.   Can I take Cody for a spin?”

“Are there enough seatbelts?”

“Chris can stay here,” Justin told her.  “We’ll just go around the block.”

“You can take him, but don’t be upset if he’s not impressed.  He’s not really into cars yet.  Unless they’re made by Tonka or Hot Wheels,” she smirked.

Standing up, he leaned over her again, bracing both of his hands on the arm rests of the chair.  “Damn you’re sexy,” he whispered close to her ear before pressing his lips to her skin.

When he pulled back she could tell she was flushed again.  “Would you stop,” she grinned with embarrassment.  “You’re making me all warm.”

“Okay, that’s my cue to leave,” Chris remarked.

“We’re going to go hang out with Cody while you finish up here,” Justin told her, obviously ignoring Chris’ comment. 

She nodded and watched the two strut out of the room, feeling completely dazed, like she’d just woke up from the best daydream in the world.  Only the best part—it hadn’t been a dream at all.

Renee came back a few minutes later with a huge grin on her face.  “Okay, let’s get this done so you can go play,” she said.

Cassidy chuckled softly as Renee sat down on her stool and pulled one of her feet out of the sudsy water.  “I’m not going to mention the fact that I’ve never seen you look so happy ever.  Not to mention the fact that you’re glowing like a fourth of July fireworks display.”

“Thanks for not mentioning it,” Cassidy smirked, her smile deepening.  She closed her eyes, the smile clinging to her lips as her mind filled with thoughts of Justin and how crazy he made her feel.

A few quiet minutes passed before Renee brought it up again.  Cassidy was surprised she’d been able to hold back for that long.  “Okay, you’re going to tell me at least a little bit, right?” the woman asked.

Cassidy dropped her chin, looking down at Renee.  “Justin is Cody’s father.”

“I kind of got that when they stormed in here and Cody charged him the way he did.  How did you manage to keep that secret all this time?”

“It’s a long story, but he didn’t know until recently.  No one did.”

“Oh, well that’s one way to handle it.”

“Yeah, and we’re trying to keep it out of the press for as long as possible…”

“You don’t have to even say it to me, girl.  Your secret’s safe, you know that.”

Cassidy nodded.  With the number of high profile clients that Renee had, she couldn’t afford to spread gossip—even though it wouldn’t exactly be gossip since it was true.  But either way, if something like that happened Renee would lose her credibility and a lot of clients.

“So are you going to not tell me the part about how you’re completely gaga over him?  I take it you guys had a relationship before, obviously.”

“It’s kind of a long story, but yeah, something like that.”  There was no way she wanted to get into the details of all that had happened five years before. 

“And now you’re both newly single and falling in love again.  How perfect!  Hey, has this been going on for awhile?”  The coincidences never even occurred to Cassidy, but as Renee asked the question, a million scenarios popped into her head.  The media could spin this in a horrible direction, saying that she and Justin had both left their spouses for each other, and who knows what the hell else! 

Her haze cleared.  Stress took over.

Forty minutes later, after Cassidy saw Renee out, she carefully made way up the stairs to Cody’s bedroom. Making sure not to scuff her freshly painted toes, even though Renee had assured her they were dry.  The picture she stumbled onto nearly knocked her off her feet.  Two grown men and one little boy sprawled out on the floor, playing with a rather intricate train set that was only half put together.

It was one of Cody’s favorite’s, but he couldn’t assemble it all by himself.  She was sure that he’d talked Justin and Chris into helping him, but it didn’t look like they were doing much better than the four year old could alone.

With a chuckle, she stepped inside the room, letting her presence be known. 

Justin looked up first.  “All through?” he asked.

Cassidy nodded.

“Mommy, can Daddy Justin and Uncle Chris stay for dinner?” Cody asked, his bright blue eyes staring up at her eagerly.

“Of course,” she plopped down, in the extra space on the floor between Cody and Chris.  “Why don’t we just order pizza, though?”

Cody was instantly excited.   “Mmmm!  Okay!”

Cassidy looked across at Justin, who was laying with his stomach down and propped up on his elbows.  “Can I talk to you for a sec?” she asked.

He nodded and rose to his feet.  

“You stay here and play with Uncle Chris,” Cassidy told her son.  “Daddy and I will be right back.”

“Okay, mommy,” the little boy agreed, paying more attention to his bright red train.

They stepped out into the hall and Cassidy brought a hand up over her heart.  “That was the first time I’ve said that and it felt—” 

“Good?” Justin asked.

She was thinking weird, but she didn’t let him know.  Weird in a good way, of course.  Moving on, she pulled Justin into her bedroom and shut the door behind them.  Of course he was automatically thinking she’d pulled him in there for different reasons than for what she had.

“You just had to sneak me away to your bedroom?” He asked with a devilish grin.

“I wish it were for what you’re thinking,” she told him.  “Sit down.”

He looked at her kind of funny and plopped down on the bed.  She sat down with him.  “What’s up?” he asked.

“I thought of something while Renee was here that I hadn’t thought about before.”

“Okay…”

“When the press gets a hold of this they’re going to paint it like you and I both left our exes for each other.   Have you thought about that?”

Justin had vaguely thought about that scenario, but honestly he was trying not to think about any of it at all.  “I am going to talk to my people tomorrow,” he told her.   “Trace thinks I should make a statement now, before it comes out like it was a big secret.”

“You mean about Cody?” she asked.

He nodded, trying to not think about how much he wanted to push her down and ravish her.  She was about the sexist damn thing he’d ever seen.  “Would that be okay with you?”

“I trust your judgment.   Whatever you think is best,” she said.

The fact that she was trusting him with something so important only made him feel for her even more, and before he even realized what he was doing, he had grabbed her hand, squeezed it and said, “I love you,” rather sappily.

“Justin.”

He instantly snapped out of the daze, realizing what he’d just admitted.  Now he was the one embarrassed.  There were two ways to play this out.  He could pretend he meant it in a different kind of way, or he could be honest and tell her the truth.  “I just said that out loud, didn’t I?”  he said instead.

She grinned and nodded, and since he still had hold of her hand, she used it to pull him close—close enough to kiss him sweetly.  “I think I might love you too,” she told him.  “But I’m not going to be as bold as you and just say it outright.  Not yet.”

He could handle that.

Letting go of her hand, he scratched the back of his head.  “I didn’t mean to.”  He must have looked completely confused, because he wanted to hit himself for letting those three little words slip out already.

She giggled and he knew everything was okay between them.  “I know.”

He just shook his head and pointed to the door.  “I’m gonna go back and play with the boys.”  Why was he acting like a bumbling idiot all the sudden?

With a laugh, she said, “I’m going to go order the pizza.”

He nodded, standing up and walking backwards.  “Sounds good.”  He let himself out, smacking himself in the forehead over his stupidity.  Jesus, he never acted that goofy! 

It was a couple hours later, after killing an extra large pizza and hanging out for awhile, that Chris left, leaving Justin to catch his own ride.  Well, not really. Cassidy told him he could take one of her cars or that she could give him a ride when he was ready.  But they both knew he’d end up staying the night again, so it didn’t really matter.

Justin came back in after walking Chris out.  Cassidy was sitting on the couch with Cody, helping him with a puzzle.  Justin sat down on the other side of Cody and didn’t say a word.  He just had this goofy, misty-eyed look on his face and Cassidy could just imagine the thoughts going through his mind.

What he’d said to her earlier in the bedroom didn’t scare her.  Maybe it should have, but instead it had actually felt really good to hear it.  Even if she’d known instantly that he hadn’t meant to say it.  It had been so adorably cute seeing him all tied up like that. 

She realized things were moving incredibly fast between them and after all they’d both been through, it would probably be smart to slow things down.  Did that mean she was going to tell him he couldn’t stay the night for the third night in a row? 

Definitely not.

Because as much as her head was telling her one thing, the rest of her was in complete disagreement and seemed to outweigh the more logic part of her.  She’d played it safe her entire life, always steering away from relationships because she didn’t want to get hurt.  The one time she did let herself actually get involved with someone, he turned out to be a total asshole.   And that had been something more in her head than in her heart, which is a totally backwards way of doing things.

She wasn’t going to listen to her head anymore.  Not when it came to love.  She was going to go with her instincts.  And her instincts were telling her that she didn’t have anything to be afraid of when it came to Justin.

So she was just going to go with it and that was that.

His eyes met with hers, looking up and over Cody’s head.  That huge goofy grin was still plastered on his face and it was extremely catching as she felt her lips curl as well.  “What’cha got there?” he finally asked Cody, looking down at him.

“Cody, can you show Justin the stegosaurus?”

His pale blue eyes peered up at her.  “Daddy Justin,” her little boy corrected her.

“Yes, Daddy Justin.”   She was still getting used to the whole daddy thing.  She looked across at Justin and whispered, “Sorry.”

He just grinned and looked down as Cody was showing him the stegosaurus.  Then he pointed to the puzzle piece of the tyrannosauruses rex, telling Justin, “That’s the T. rex.  He’s a carnival.”

“Carnivore.”  Cassidy held back a chuckle as she corrected him.  He was pretty good with most of his pronunciations, but there were a few big words he had problems with.

“Yeah,” Cody agreed.   “That means he’s a meat-eater.”

Justin pointed to another dinosaur piece and Cody immediately spouted off, “Triceratops.  Plant eater.”

“Wow, you sure know a lot about dinosaurs,” Justin said.  “Who taught you all that?”

“I dunno,” the little boy answered nonchalantly.  “Mommy and Grandpa, I guess.”

“We read books together.   Huh, baby.”

“Yeah,” Cody agreed.   “We do.”

Cassidy brushed a hand over his soft curls.  “You ‘bout ready to get your jammies on?” she asked her little boy.

“Yeah,” he said with a hesitant sigh.  “Can Daddy Justin help me?”

“Of course.”

Cody hopped up with an eager grin.  “Come on,” he said to Justin, grabbing his hand and trying to pull him off the couch.  Cassidy had never seen Cody so anxious to get ready for bed—ever!

They both put Cody to bed together that night and he went down without any problems.  Cassidy went upstairs to check on him shortly after they’d tucked him in and he was out like a light.  Smiling to herself, she headed back down to where Justin was on the couch, flipping through the channels on the TV.

They’d made sure to keep their distance until Cody was sleeping, and now that he was, she had every intention of pouncing on him when she got back. 

His neck craned, his inviting blue eyes catching sight of her and that fabulous crooked grin easing over his lips.   It was a look that fit him very well and attracted her very much.  She made way around the couch, noticing how he’d kicked off his shoes and made himself comfortable, with his feet up and a couple of pillows propped up behind his back.

He looked completely inviting and she was planning on taking full advantage of it.  She climbed over him, letting her knees settle into the cushion in between his legs before collapsing on top of him.  Instantly his arms curled around her, a pleased hum sounding from his voice as he welcomed her against him.  Closing her eyes, she let her face sink into the crook of his neck and took a big breath of him—feeling absolutely, one hundred percent content.

It was a great feeling.

“I like having you here,” she told him, not hiding how much she enjoyed him.

“I like being here,” he replied.

She took in another deep breath and simply relaxed.  She felt so comfortable, she almost could have fallen asleep.  If it weren’t for the fact that there were other things she wanted to do to him first!

But they did lay that way for quite sometime.  Cassidy hated to compare, but she was experiencing something she’d never felt with Jason—something she’d never felt with anyone.  And she couldn’t help but think that whatever was happing between them was something very special.

“I’m not looking forward to tomorrow,” he stated softly, after several long quiet moments.

“Because of the calls you need to make?” she asked, running circles with her fingertip over the cotton shirt that covered his chest.

He nodded.  She didn’t see it, but she felt it.  “Yeah,” he sighed.  “I hate talking on the phone all day.”

She imagined he especially hated it when the calls he had to make regarded reporting his personal life to the rest of the world, but he didn’t expand on it.  “When do you start working again?” She wasn’t sure where it came from, but the words popped out of her mouth before she’d had any second thoughts.

“Depends,” he said.

“On what?”

“On me,” he answered simply.  “I’m kind of enjoying my time off right now.”

She grinned, knowing that it had everything to do with her and with Cody. 

“Hey, I wanna ask you something,” he told her.  “Don’t think this is completely off the wall, okay?”

“Okay,” she agreed, her cheek still nestled against his chest.  It rumbled every time he spoke and she was enjoying very much the feel of it.

“Was Cody very attached to Jason?  Did he have a hard time with the divorce?”

She didn’t question what he was asking.  Instead she found herself answering openly and honestly.  “Not really.  I was afraid he would, because Jason and I started dating when he was just a baby.  But I think because Jason was away from us so much that it made it a lot easier.”

“How come Cody doesn’t call him daddy?”  She smiled against him.  Of course he would want to know that.  “I mean, for a kid to grow up with someone like that.  I’m sure if you’d wanted him to, he could have easily adopted Cody and considered him his.”

She pressed both palms into his chest and sat up, situating herself on his lap even though he was still laying down.   With a shrug, she tried her best to explain.   “I don’t know.  I guess I could have gone that route.  Obviously I’m extremely glad that I didn’t.  I never referred to Jason as daddy to Cody.  I honestly don’t think Jason wanted that role, which, like I said, is really a blessing in disguise because it would have made things so much harder.  But I also feel like that’s part of the reason why Cody doesn’t understand what a daddy is.”

Justin grabbed both her hands and tangled his fingers with hers.  “Quit guilting yourself.  You’ve done enough of that already.”

“I know, but I’m sure it’s all very confusing to him.”  Her head fell back, her eyes shot to the ceiling.  “I don’t know what to do.”

He pushed his torso up from the sofa and sat up.  She slipped, her butt sliding from him to the couch cushion between his thighs.  He reached out to steady her and she found herself smiling again.   Then he leaned forward and kissed her gently and sweetly, as her legs automatically curled around his hips.  “I think we’ve had enough serious talk,” he said, as he pulled back just barely.

Her grin widened.

Then he placed another delicate kiss to her lips, both of his hands braced against her cheeks.  He pulled back again after a lengthy exchange, his touch falling away, the back of his left hand skimming purposely down the side of her breast.  It sparked an instant fire deep inside her.  “And just for the record,” he said, kissing her again, quickly but thoroughly, “Jason is the biggest fucking idiot in the world for screwing around on a woman that’s so fucking hot she can invade a man’s thoughts for five years straight without hearing a single word from her.”

“You have not been thinking about me for the past five years,” she said with a silly smirk.

But the look he shot her in return was completely serious.  “I don’t think one day passed when I didn’t.”

She closed her eyes, feeling guilty again because the cards had totally been in her hands.  But she’d been so different back then and she’d had no idea.   “I wanted to call.  I should’ve called—”

He put a finger to her lips to shush her.  “Stop.  We’re past that now.  Let go of your guilt.  Please.”   When he finished his breath was on her jaw, right before she felt his mouth against her flesh. 

She nodded, agreeing with what he’d said although it was still on her mind.  His fingertips trailed down the front of her neck as he pressed his lips just underneath her ear.  More than anything she wanted to clear her mind and simply enjoy him and the way that he made her feel.   But she was having a difficult time.  “Do you think that if I would’ve called—“   She was filled with thoughts of “what if”, even though it was the last thing she wanted to be thinking about.  She just couldn’t help but wonder if the past five years would have been great if she'd been with him.

“That we would’ve been happy together for the past five years?”  He kissed the corner of her mouth before drawing up enough to look her in the eye.   “I don’t know, but it doesn’t do any good to think about what might have been.  You know that.  Let’s just enjoy what’s happening to us right now.”

And she wanted to.  She wanted to so badly.  “You’re right.  I know.”   Her hands were joined with his.  “And if it wasn’t for Cody and the fact that—”  

“Stop,” he told her.   “Just stop.”  His voice lowered.  “I know you feel like you hid from me and that you kept us apart, kept me away from my son—but seriously, I don’t know what I would have done if you would’ve called me up back then and told me you were pregnant.  I mean, come on.  Things could have been totally different then how we feel it would have been—thinking about it now.   I could have been a total ass and maybe I wouldn’t know Cody any better than I do now and maybe we’d hate each other because of it.”  He tipped her chin up with his finger.  “You know, instead of falling in love with each other, like we are now.”

She grinned, amazed that he could say something so right.  And amazed that he could be so open after all he’d been through.  Amazed that he wasn’t afraid to admit how he was feeling—and this time it wasn’t an accident, at all.

© BrandyRae 2005

It seemed like Justin had barely released the statement when the madness began.  Twenty four hours had passed and they’d both been holed up in their homes ever since—separately.  There were paparazzi camped out all around Justin’s property, all of them waiting to get that money shot—the first one of Justin and his little boy.

No names were released, but Cassidy was still too paranoid to go anywhere.  And seeing Justin was completely out of the question.  He couldn’t leave his house without being tailed and if anyone tried to come to see him, the ruthless photographers were all over it.  Once she was seen with him, her whole life was going to change.

They were both miserable, and spending a lot of time on the phone to each other.  Justin was “working every angle,” he told her, trying to make it so they could see each other—safely. 

It was bad enough just her missing him, but Cody was missing him too.  He didn’t understand why he couldn’t see his “Daddy Justin.”  They’d spent nearly every waking moment with him for the past two weeks and Cody had become very attached to him.  Cassidy tried to explain to Cody that he would be able to see his daddy very soon, but since she couldn’t tell him exactly when, her answers weren’t very satisfying.   He’d let it pass for an hour or two and then he’d start asking again, “Can we go see Daddy Justin now?”

It was breaking her heart.

She’d even tried explaining it to him.  That there were “bad people” that wanted to take pictures of him and that mommy and daddy were trying to keep him safe from those people.  But he didn’t understand and it didn’t help.

They’d talked about Justin sneaking out of his house and trying to make it to hers, but once they figured out where Cassidy lived, things would only become worse and that was the last thing both of them wanted.  Justin decided that he “wasn’t about to draw those fuckers a goddamn map to get to his little boy” and Cassidy agreed.  They’d have to think of something else.

It was about eight thirty in the evening when there was a call from the front gate.  She was instantly nervous.  She switched the TV to the security camera, but she didn’t recognize the car.  It was a Mercedes sedan with very dark windows.  She didn’t think it was someone from the media, but she definitely felt very wary of it.

She went to the call box and pressed the button.  “Can I help you?”

“Cassidy.  It’s Trace.”

“I’m sorry to be annoying, but can you stick your head out the window so I can see you?”

He didn’t question it.   She watched him on the TV as his familiar face peered out the window of his sleek black sedan.

Immediately she let him in, waiting at the door as he pulled up. 

“For future reference,” he said, as he strutted towards her, “don’t wait out in the open.  Even though you saw it was me, you never know.  People will go to drastic lengths to get what they’re looking for.”

She hadn’t thought about that.  “Oh,” she said simply.  He’d put a little bit more fear in her.  As if she wasn’t filled with enough already!

He was right in front of her now.  “I know you’re sort of used to being in the public eye, but that was nothing compared to what you’re going to have to deal with now.  I just want you to be prepared.”

Yeah, if he was trying to scare her, it was definitely working.  “Okay.”

“Can I come in?” he finally asked.

“Oh, yeah.”  She felt completely idiotic, but he’d put so many thoughts in her head, inviting him in had completely escaped her.

She led him inside the house, to the family room where Cody was playing quietly, the shot of the front gate from the security camera still showing silently on the TV.  Cody’s eyes shot up when he heard their footsteps.  “Hi Uncle Trace!” he hopped to his feet with excitement.

Cassidy smirked softly at the thought of how many uncles Cody suddenly had—especially since he hadn’t even had one before.

“Hey little buddy,” Trace grinned wide and kneeled down to meet the little boy.  “I brought something for you.”

“You did?” he asked with bright eyes.

And with that Trace pulled a plastic pterodactyl from behind his back, where it had been hidden under his shirt with one of the wings stuffed in his back pocket.  “That’s from your daddy,” Trace told him.

“Really?” Cody’s grin was wide and sincere.  “Awesome!”

Trace chuckled and patted Cody on the head before he stood up.  “Go play.  Okay, baby?” Cassidy told him.

He didn’t answer, just skipped back to the center of the floor where he’d left his other toys. 

“So, what’s going on?” Cassidy asked.

“Justin wants to meet you at my house,” Trace said.

“Oh, right now?”

“Yeah.  He said to pack for a few days, if you can.”

“If I can?” she asked.  “Where are we going?”

Trace shrugged.  “Some place where the press won’t find you.”

She thought it over in her head for about two seconds before deciding to go along with it.  “Okay.  Can you sit with Cody while I go pack us some clothes?”

“Not a problem,” the man said.

Cassidy had never packed so fast in her life.  She wondered where on Earth they were going.  Where could they go where the paparazzi wouldn’t find them?  Did a place like that actually exist?

She definitely wanted to find out.

Twenty minutes later she’d thrown as much of her and Cody’s stuff as she could fit into one large suitcase, figuring if she forgot anything—which she was sure she did—that she could just buy new if she had to.

Cody was full of questions as Cassidy helped buckle him into the backset of Trace’s car.  He was talking a million words a minute, but Cassidy knew that as soon as they got on the road he was going to totally crash. 

She slid into the passenger seat of Trace’s pricey vehicle and let out a breathy sigh.  “Don’t worry,” Trace told her as he started the car.  “My best friend’s pretty resourceful.  I’m sure he has something up his sleeve to get you guys away from this for at least a few days.”

And Cassidy figured that Trace probably knew exactly what that was.  He just wasn’t telling her.

Sneaking out of his house was not an easy task.  Justin had to think of someone to come and smuggle him out that wouldn’t look like anybody important.   Trace recruited the help of his brother-in-law, Eric, who was also a well-known personal trainer in the area.

Lisa’s older brother arrived in full work-out attire, carrying a bag of equipment, and Justin showed him to the gym—where he turned on every single light and purposely made himself visible through the windows, just in case.  With the way technology had advanced and with how ruthless the industry had become, the paparazzi would go to all lengths available to get pictures—even if it meant climbing a fucking tree or—unfortunately not unheard of—breaking onto someone’s property.

Justin worked out with Eric for about forty-five minutes, talking about this crazy situation he was in the entire time.  Then he made it look like they were moving into an area more out of view—still, just in case someone was watching him.

It pissed him off thoroughly to have to think that way, but he didn’t want to fuck this up.

“Okay,” Justin told Eric, going over it one more time.  “So, I’m going to walk you to the door in this.”  He was referring to his bright white clothing—noticeable clothing.  “You go to your car, open the back door and you realize you forgot your gym bag.  I’ll let you back in.  You go to the gym and grab your stuff.  I’m going to throw on a black hooded sweatshirt and black pants and hop into your backseat while you’re in the house.  You come out and shut the door.  The front door will be locked, don’t worry about that.  Trace is going to come back later and shut off all the lights and set the alarm.  You got it?”

Eric nodded.  He looked a little excited about it, like they were pulling some 007 stealth move, or something.

Justin smirked.  “Okay, let’s do this.”

It went off just like he’d planned it, and it wasn’t long before Justin was laying on the floor in the backseat of Eric’s black Navigator.  When the man climbed into the driver’s seat Justin told him, “Okay, everything’s good.   Don’t say anything because they’ll see your lips moving. Let’s go.”  

The car started moving and he was glad that he wasn’t the type to get carsick, because it was very strange riding on the floor. 

He felt the car straighten once they were on the road and past his steep drive.  He waited about five minutes and then asked, “Does it look like anyone’s following us?”

“It’s hard to say.   Did you want me to go straight to Trace and Lisa’s?”

He did because he was anxious to see Cassidy and Cody, but he didn’t want to take the chance of being followed there.  “I don’t know.  Just do whatever you think is best.”  He was frustrated.   He could not believe he was crouched down in the back of someone’s car, hiding, just so he could leave his fucking house without being followed!

Cassidy had been at Trace’s house for 30 minutes already with no sign of Justin.  Just as she’d expected, Cody had fallen asleep in the car. She’d carried him inside and laid him down in one of Trace’s spare bedrooms.  Their house might be considered small compared to many others in the area, but it was very nice and beautifully decorated.  Trace had given her the quick rundown—4 bedroom/4 bath/kitchen/living room, etc.  Pretty standard.

Now she was sitting in the living room, talking with Trace and his wife Lisa—who Cassidy had seen in several movies and had no idea that she was married to Justin’s best friend. 

The couple’s precious newborn was sleeping in a bassinet about two feet away.

Cassidy wasn’t good with people she didn’t know all that well, especially other women.  She was definitely feeling uncomfortable.  Of course Lisa was nothing but nice, and obviously trying to make her feel more at ease.  But with each minute that Justin didn’t show, she was getting more and more antsy.  Not to mention worried, since she’d been told that Lisa’s brother had gone over almost two hours earlier to rescue him.

Finally their home phone rang and Cassidy was praying that it was them. 

Trace answered and said a total of two words.  “Yeah,” and “okay.”

“They’re pulling up now,” he announced.  “I’m going to open the garage for them in case they were followed.”

Cassidy sighed—thank God. 

“Hopefully they weren’t,” Lisa remarked, standing up and peeking inside the baby’s basinet.   The infant hadn’t made a peep since Cassidy had arrived.

Cassidy nodded and picked up the bottle of water Lisa had given her when she’d first sat down.  She took a rather healthy chug, trying to hide the fact that she was a complete wreck over the whole situation.

When she finally heard Justin’s voice, she calmed instantly, even though it was obvious he was equally as irritated as she was.  “That was fucking ridiculous,” he stated, appearing through a wide doorway.  Then he shot Cassidy a smile—one that seemed to speak a million things.

He beckoned for her and she got up to meet him.  He opened up his arms to her, draped in all black, Cassidy’s mind wandering about what exactly he’d gone through to get there, as she let her body rest against him.  This is what she’d missed more than anything.  She’d missed the comfort of his touch and the security she felt when he was near.

“Our boy asleep?” he asked her softly.

She smiled at the way he’d referred to Cody.  “Yeah. But I’m afraid he’s going to wake up and freak out once he realizes he’s in a strange place.”

“Well, we’re not staying much longer.”

Cassidy leaned back to look him in the eye.  “Where are we going?” she asked, hoping she wasn’t going to be kept in the dark for much longer.

“The airport.”

“Airport?  Is that safe?  Won’t someone see us?”

He shook his head no.  “We’re not taking a commercial flight.  Don’t worry.  Trace is going to drop us off and we’ll only have to walk about ten steps to board the plane.   As long as we’re not followed we should be fine.”

Inhaling deeply, she looked at him a bit skeptically.  “You still didn’t really tell me where we’re going,” she said.

He grinned goofily.  “To spend a little time with my family,” he finally revealed.  “No one will bother us there.  I hope that’s okay.”

The thought instantly made her nervous, but she wasn’t going to put up a fight.  If that’s where they needed to go to have a little peace, then she was all for it.

An hour later they’d boarded a small private jet at Burbank airport.  If someone had got a picture, they hadn’t noticed it.  Of course that was highly likely, but at least they’d be out of town when it hit—if it hit.

Cody stayed awake long enough to be buckled safely into one of the cushy leather seats during take-off.  As soon as the plane was safely in the air, Cassidy reclined his seat so he was more comfortable and he was back to sleep in five minutes flat.   She thanked the heavens above that he was being so easy.  Of course, he’d been very happy to wake up and find his Daddy Justin carrying him earlier.  It had warmed her heart the way he’d curled up to Justin’s shoulder and mumbled something about how much he’d missed him.  The little boy’s actions had affected Justin, too.  She’d watched the emotion in his eyes.  He didn’t have to say a word for her to know.

Now she and Justin sat across the way from their sleeping son, neither speaking a word, but with a million thoughts running through their minds.

Cassidy rested her head against Justin’s shoulder as he curled an arm around her.  Then she let out a quiet breath, closing her eyes for just a moment.  She was tired, but there was no way she’d be able to sleep.

“Tired, baby?” he asked.

“Yeah,” she sighed, letting her weight sink in to him even more as she flattened one palm against his stomach.

“I’m sure my mom will hang out with Cody for awhile tomorrow so we can catch up on our sleep.  I know I won’t be able to sleep until we get there.”

“Yeah, me either.”

“Speaking of my mom…” he continued.  Cassidy was instantly curious, but she was too comfortable to move from her position.  “When I told her we were coming, I told her that you and I are involved now.”

“Involved, huh?” That was one way to put it.

“Well, yeah,” he let out a breath loudly.  “I know that we’ve been trying not to be too affectionate in front of Cody, but I’m going to be honest with you—I really do not want to sleep in separate rooms while we’re there.  And I don’t want to hide the fact that we have feelings for each other, either.  So I think we should talk about this now, before we get there.”

At that she did sit up, looking at him kind of funny.  “Okay…” she remarked with mild confusion.  Where had all this come from?

“I just think that it’s a normal thing, for us to be, you know—”

She shook her head, now she was confused.  “No, I don’t know.  What are you trying to say?”

“Okay,” he shifted, bringing one knee up and turning towards her on the long leather sofa seat.  “I guess I’m trying to say that it should be normal for Cody to see us acting like most mommies and daddies act.  You know what I mean?”

“You mean like if we’d been married all this time, like most normal families, that Cody would obviously see us hugging and kissing and being affectionate with each other.”

“Yes.  Exactly.”

“Well, I agree.  I never said that I didn’t agree with you.”

“Oh…” He said it as if he’d expected to have to talk her into what he was saying.  “So why have we been hiding it all this time?”

Cassidy shrugged.  “I guess I was just afraid of him getting hurt.  But it’s not going to really make a difference, is it?”

“I don’t think so.   It’s not like I’m just some random guy you’re shacking up with.  I’m his father.”

A tiny bit of a grin played at Cassidy’s lips.  Even if Justin hadn’t been Cody’s father, she still didn’t think of him as just some random guy that she was shacking up with.  But she definitely got the point.  “Your point is well taken, Justin.  I don’t think we need to hide our affection from anyone.  Well, except for the press and the paparazzi,” she smirked.

He shook the thought away in an obvious fashion.  “Okay, that brings me to my next topic for discussion.”

Cassidy just looked at him funny.  She was enjoying this rather curious and talky side of Justin and she was wondering what else he was about to throw at her.

“My mom asked where she should set him up to sleep.  Will he be comfortable sleeping in a room by himself or do you want him to sleep in a room with us?   My room is pretty big and it wouldn’t be hard to move a bed in there for him.  I have this little sitting area that’s kind of separate from the bedroom, but not.  It’s hard to explain.  But we could put a bed in there for him and that way he would be with us but not like right next to us.”

He was talking very fast again and Cassidy was smiling very big because of it.

“What?” he asked of her grin.

“You’re funny,” she told him.  “Look, no one needs to go through all that trouble.  How long are we staying anyway?”

“I don’t know.   However long we want.  And it’s not trouble, at all.”

“Well, can we just figure it out when we get there?” she asked.  “My brain is too exhausted to process all these thoughts you’re throwing at me.”

Justin grinned somewhat bashfully.  He realized he was acting like a crazy man, but he just couldn’t help it.  “Okay, just one more thing and then I’ll drop it.  I just need to know this now because I probably won’t be able to ask you later.” 

“Okay…”

“If he’s in our room does that mean no sex?”

She outright laughed at him then.  He wasn’t surprised.  Was it sad that as they approached the 48 hour mark of not having each other that he felt like he was in dire need of it already?

“Of course it does.   Silly question,” he answered when she didn't.

“Justin, you’re thinking way too much about this.  We’ll just play it by ear, okay?”

He nodded and huffed.  He was acting like a crazy man, no doubt.  With another deep breath, he tugged his sweatshirt over his head and laid it on the table in front of them.  Then he laid down on his back and put his head in her lap, looking straight up at her.  

Her hand automatically went to his head, her manicured nails tickling his scalp as her fingers brushed through his short hair.  He let his eyes close briefly, enjoying her heavenly touch.  This is just what he needed. 

After a few moments, he opened his eyes and looked up at her again.  She had this sappy look on her face as she stared down at him.  It made him smile, knowing she was enjoying the moment just as much as he was.   “I missed you,” he told her softly.

“I missed you too.”

Then he added, “I’m horny,” before he had a chance to stop it.

She smirked, scratching the top of his head.  “If you’re thinking of joining the mile high club tonight I’m going to have to disappoint you this time.  Not with Cody on the plane.”

“No,” he said, his eyes closing again, his smile wide.  “I joined that club a long time ago.”

Her touch left his head and instead he felt a swift flick to his ear.  Instantly his eyes popped open again as he grabbed the right side of his head.  “Owe.”

“I didn’t need to know that,” she said.

He grinned and said, “Sorry,” as her hand fell back to his scalp and massaged.  “I think I’m a little delirious because I’m so tired.”

She chuckled softly.  “I forgive you,” she said.

“Good, because I love you.”

Her face lit up as she returned the sentiment.  “I love you too.”  He didn't just hear the words, he felt them.  She’d said it with no hesitation and that pleased him even more than he’d expected.  He was glad they’d got to that point.  Everything about their relationship felt absolutely incredible.

“And I’d much rather be a member of the mile high club with you than anyone else.”

She was giggling still.   “Just close your eyes and go to sleep,” she told him.

“I can’t sleep on a plane.”  But his eyes were closed and he did feel awfully tired.

“We’ll see about that,” she said with a smirk, still stroking his head tenderly.  He breathed deeply and felt extremely relaxed.  Maybe sleep wasn’t so far off after all.  Maybe nothing was too far off, when she was involved. 

© BrandyRae 2005

Cassidy didn’t sleep a wink during the flight, but as soon as they got in the car, she was out.  It was a 30 minute trip from the airport to Justin’s home.  She vaguely remembered hearing Cody’s sleepy voice question where they were and where they were going.   She knew Justin had answered him, but if asked she certainly couldn’t recall what he’d said. 

Lynn had picked them up.   It was almost 6:00 a.m.—3:00 a.m. Pacific Time—by the time they got to her home.  “Cassie, baby.  Wake up.”   Her eyes felt so heavy that she could barely open them, but somehow she managed.  Justin was smiling, laughing almost.  “We’re here,” he said, bending down in front of her.

She looked past him to see Cody and Lynn walking hand in hand towards the house.  She grinned sappily at the sight.  “I am too tired.  I think I’ll just sleep here,” she said groggily.

That oh-so familiar chuckle fell from his lips as he pulled on one of her arms.  “You can’t sleep in the car.  Don’t make me carry you.”

She closed her eyes and let her head rest against the seat.  “Mmmm, I think I like that idea,” she mumbled.

Next thing she knew, his presence was close, leaning over her and unbuckling her seatbelt in the backseat.  Her eyes popped open as he gripped onto her with both hands and began pulling her out of the seat.  “Okay, okay,” she stopped him.  “I’ll get up.”

“I thought so,” he smirked.

She held his hand as they walked up to the house.  It was dark and she was too tired to try and concentrate on where she was going.  Justin was still laughing at her sleepy demeanor when they stepped through the front door.  “Come on,” he told her.  “I already brought your stuff in.  My mom set up the room right next to mine for Cody.  She’s taking him up there now.  I think he’s going to like it.”

Cassidy slowly shook off her grogginess as Justin led her upstairs.  The house was still pretty dark, even though the sun was starting to peak.  But she was too tired to observe or take anything in.  Cody’s room was just at the top of the stairs.  She knew this because the door was open and she could hear his voice, along with Lynn’s, coming from inside.

She gasped unexpectedly as she stepped inside.  It was decorated to the T—or T. rex, she should say.  There were dinosaurs everywhere.  “How on Earth did you have time for all this?” Cassidy asked with shock.

Lynn turned to her with a grin.  “I’ve been working on it ever since I found out,” she smiled.  “I had to hurry and add a few last minute touches last night when Justin called.”

“Thank you so much, Lynn.  He is going to feel so comfortable here.”  Cassidy was truly touched at all the obvious work the woman had put into Cody’s room. 

Cody was already starting to settle in, as he climbed up on the dinosaur patterned bed spread.  “Mommy, I’m still sleepy,” he yawned.

“I know you are, sweetheart,” she said, making her way towards him. 

“I’ll leave y’all alone,” Lynn said.   “Cassidy, please, make yourself at home.  Okay?   Just holler if you need anything.”

With a nod, Cassidy accepted the verbal offering, smiling as Lynn patted her son’s shoulder and left the room.   Justin came up and stood beside her.  “Why don’t you get under the covers, buddy,” he suggested, looking down at his little boy.

Sleepily Cody conceded, slipping his blue pajama-clad body underneath the bedding, his eyes already half closed.   The rubber soled slippers he’d traveled in were on the floor, right where he’d stepped out of them.  Bringing a fist to his tired eyes, he yawned again—big.

“Mommy and daddy will be in the room right next door, if you need us, okay?” Cassidy told him.

He nodded, before planting his curly blond head into the pillow.  He yawned again and his eyes closed.  Cassidy leaned down and kissed his sleepy head.  Then Justin did the same.  “Love you,” Cody mumbled.

“Love you too,” they both said.

With a grin, Cassidy followed Justin out of the room, shutting off the light and closing the door.  She barely caught the glow of the soft night light in the corner before it shut. 

She turned to Justin with a tired smirk.  “Take me to bed,” she said.  Then she thought about how it had probably sounded and added, “to sleep, of course,” just in case anyone was in ear shot.

Justin laughed at her.   “You’re dingy when you’re tired,” he told her.

“Yeah, yeah…” she groaned.  “Just show me where I can lay my head.”

“I’ll show you where you can lay your head, alright,” he teased.

“Justin,” she said, warningly.

He laughed again and opened his bedroom door.  Then he pointed to the large, white bed in the middle of the room.  It was the only thing Cassidy could focus on.  It looked mighty comfortable, with mounds of pillows and a big fluffy duvet.   A soft hum sounded from her lips and Justin was chuckling once more.

“I’m going to use the bathroom,” he told her.

“No.  Me first,” she said, and headed straight for the open doorway that obviously led to the adjoining bathroom. 

Justin shook his head, smiling to himself as he headed over to his dresser and pulled out a clean pair of shorts and boxer briefs.  He needed a shower before he slept.  Then he planned on sleeping well into the afternoon.  There was no better place to sleep than good ol’ home sweet home.  And he had a feeling he’d sleep even better than usual with Cassidy lying next to him.

He passed the closed door that she was behind and headed straight for the shower, turning on the hot water and stripping down to nothing.  He didn’t notice Cassidy staring at him until he caught sight of her when he started to step inside.

“That’s really not fair,” she said, her arms crossed stiffly over her chest.

“What?” he asked, the steam from the shower pouring out of the open glass door as he had yet to get in.

“You’re naked.”

With a quiet chuckle, he told her, “So get in with me then,” and finally stepped onto the wet tile floor, letting the hot water douse his skin.

He never expected her to take him up on his offer, but about thirty seconds later, as he’d just soaped himself thoroughly, her hands were wrapping around him from behind and her bare skin was pressed into the back of him.  Inwardly he groaned.  She didn’t know what she was getting herself into. 

His body turned in her grasp, as the water above rinsed the soap away.  He was instantly hard, and she’d noticed just as quickly as it had happened.  “I thought you were too tired,” he said.

“For a shower?” she asked.

He looked at her with lust-filled eyes.  “Quit playing with me,” he told her.

“Me?” she asked, feigning innocence.

Wrapping his arms around her slender waist, he squeezed her tight and pressed a wet kiss to her lips.  Then he reached for the soap.  “I think I’m going to enjoy this a little too much,” he said as he began covering her skin with suds.  She smirked, her eyes looking mighty heavy.  He found himself chuckling again over the fact that she was so obviously tired, but still she was here—in the shower with him, naked, knowing undoubtedly that she was definitely about to get fucked.  “Don’t fall asleep,” he told her, just as he ran a soapy hand in between her wet thighs.   “A concussion would really screw this up for me.”

The murmur she’d let out at first touch was stifled with his snide remark.  Her brown eyes popped open, shooting him an incredulous look from the tops of her lids.  “Thanks a lot,” she spouted off.

He laughed.  “I’m just kidding, baby.”  Then he braced both hands at the tops of her arms and guided her under the shower head, letting the soap rinse away.  He studied her for just a minute, thoroughly enjoying her silhouette and making it known.   She had a body to die for—curvy but athletic, firm and tone, but still very feminine.  He loved looking at it, but he loved touching it even more. 

Grabbing her, he pressed everything he had against her and kissed her thoroughly—completely.  A soft moan seeped from her vocals as both her hands ran down his back.  “Justin,” she said it softly, her eyes closed. 

“What, baby?”

“As much as I want to,” she said, “I don’t think I have enough energy to stand up for much longer.”

He smiled, loving her too much to let her tired legs suffer.  “We’ll get out,” he said, “but you better not fall asleep as soon as your head hits the pillow.”

“I think I can manage ten more minutes,” she grinned sleepily.

“Well, I think I need at least twenty,” he told her with a smirk.

“I’ll try my best.”

He chuckled lightly, shutting off the water and grabbing her a towel.  He took the liberty of wrapping it around her before grabbing one for himself.  Once they were both dry, he scooped her up and carried her to the bed, where he got a good thirty minutes out of her instead of the twenty he’d asked for and triple the ten she’d first offered.  Then they both thought to put some clothes on before curling up together and drifting off to sleep.

“You’re my grandma too?” Cody asked Lynn, as he sat at the kitchen table with a bowl of cereal in front of him and a small glass of orange juice.

“Yes, I am.  I’m your daddy’s momma so that makes me your grandma.”

“I like grandmas,” he said simply, scooping a bite of Peanut Butter Crunch into his mouth. 

Lynn was smiling—inside and out.  It was just after eleven.  Cody had come stumbling down the stairs about twenty minutes earlier.  He didn’t ask for his mommy or his daddy.  He’d sat down beside Lynn on the couch and told her that he was hungry.

They’d gone in the kitchen together and she’d let him pick from the array of unopened cereal boxes that she kept stocked for Justin.  Now they sat at the kitchen table together, carrying on a conversation while Cody ate his breakfast.

The realization was hitting her full force—she had a grandson!  And he was about the cutest little boy she’d ever seen.  He reminded her of Justin in so many ways, and not just because of the striking resemblance.  He’d inherited many of Justin’s personality traits, too.  A fact that amazed her, considering the little boy had just barely met his father.

She felt herself wishing deeply that her son had finally found the family that he’d been wanting for so long.   She genuinely liked Cassidy.  She got a good vibe from the girl—and the chemistry between the two had been apparent two weeks before when she’d first been introduced.

There’d been no need for Justin to tell her the two of them were now “involved”, as he’d put it.   Lynn had already known.  Call it mother’s intuition, but she’d known it was bound to happen sooner or later—that first day when Justin had brought her and Cody to the house.  Maybe it was fate, them stumbling into each other after all this time, both coming out of horrible marriages—needing something much more stable.  Lynn certainly believed in those types of things, and she knew that Justin did too. 

Cassidy wasn’t sure what time it was when she opened her eyes.  The sun had been up when she’d fallen asleep, so the light cracking through the blinds didn’t mean a whole lot.  She focused on the back of Justin’s dirty blond head.  He was turned away from her, curled on his side, sound asleep.

She pushed herself up and leaned over him, staring down at his stubbled face.  “Justin.”

He groaned, sort of an “Mmmm?” sound.

“I’m getting up.”

He groaned again, but didn’t budge an inch.

“You’re going to sleep all day, aren’t you?”

That question didn’t even warrant a groan, apparently.  Shaking her head, she climbed out of bed and headed for the bathroom to freshen up a little before heading downstairs.

She checked Cody’s bedroom first.  Just as she thought, he wasn’t there.  She hoped he hadn’t been any trouble to Lynn.  He was normally a well mannered child, but all kids have their moments and he was in a totally new place.   Plus he didn’t know Lynn all that well.

It was a pleasant surprise to find the two of them sitting on the couch in the family room, the TV on Nicktoons and Cody explaining the premise of the particular cartoon they were watching.  Cassidy should have known the name of it, but it was fairly new and she couldn’t remember it at the moment.

Lynn looked up at the sound of her arrival.  “Well, hello there,” she said with a hospitable grin.  “I hope you finally got some good rest?”

Cassidy nodded.  “Yes.  Thank you.”

“I’m sure my son is still sound asleep.”  It was a statement, rather than a question.

“Very much so,” Cassidy smirked, taking a seat next to Cody.  She patted her little boy’s knee.  “How’d you sleep?” she asked.

“Fine,” he answered simply. 

Cassidy peered over his head and focused on Lynn.  “I hope he wasn’t too much trouble this morning.  Has he been up very long?”

“Since about eleven, and he definitely hasn’t been any trouble.  Actually, I was hoping it would be okay if I took him out for a little bit?  I wanted to take him shopping and then maybe to lunch, if that’s okay?”

“Sure,” Cassidy told her.

“You guys can have some more time to rest up and I can have some more time getting to know my grandson.”   She smiled big and wide as she said it.   “Then tonight you will finally get to meet my husband, Paul, and I am planning a big home cooked meal, so make sure you’re hungry.”

Cassidy felt like she should be saying ‘yes ma’am’ but instead she said, “Oh definitely.”

Lynn grinned again and said, “Good.”

“I just want to say thanks again, too, for having us and for the wonderful room you made up for Cody.  We really appreciate it.”

“Please, don’t mention it.  It was my pleasure,” Lynn smiled.

“About the room, though.   Did Justin know, because he was asking me on the plane where I wanted Cody to sleep.”

Lynn smirked.  “He didn’t know until I picked you guys up this morning.   I think you were probably conked out in the back seat when we talked about it.  I had asked him about sleeping arrangements yesterday, just trying to get a feel for if you were going to be okay with it.  So that’s probably why he was asking you.”

That made sense.

A few minutes later, after Lynn told her to help herself in the kitchen if she was hungry, Cassidy watched the two of them walk out the door, reminding Cody one last time to “behave himself for Grandma Lynn.”

“I will, mommy,” he told her eagerly, smiling from ear to ear.

She got a strong feeling that her son was enjoying all the new family members in his life.  The fact that they all kept buying him stuff probably wasn’t hurting, but she couldn’t very well argue it! 

Finding a bowl of fruit in the kitchen, she helped herself to an orange and a glass of water before returning upstairs to see if Justin had moved at all.  She had to laugh when she found him flat on his back, nose to the sky, arms wide and covers completely thrown off of him.  He wasn’t snoring, but a very soft whistle was coming out of his mouth with each breath, as his lips were parted just barely.

With a giggle she pounced on top of him. 

His entire body receded into the mattress as he let out a rather annoyed “oomph” sound.  He blinked his eyes several times before finally forcing them open.  As soon as he was conscious enough to realize what was happening, he tangled his arms and legs around her and squeezed her tight.  Then he groaned, his voice hoarse and sleepy.  “Morning,” he said.

“Afternoon, actually,” she corrected, her cheek smashed against the front of his shoulder.

“How’s Cody?” he asked, keeping her locked in his hold.

“He’s fine.  He just left with your mom.  They went shopping and then they were going to have lunch.”

“Good, so we can both go back to sleep then.”

“We could.  Or you could get up and show me around.”

His diaphragm sank as he exhaled a noisy breath from his nose.  “You want me to get up?”

“That’s the idea.”

“Alright,” he said, finally loosening his grip.  “I guess so.”

She sat up, perched on top of him and pressed both her palms into his chest.  “I think I could get used to this,” she told him.

He looked at her kind of funny, obviously not understanding what she meant.  “What?” he asked.

“This,” she said.   “Me, you, Cody—together, you know.”

He grinned and his voice was humming again as he pulled her down on top of him once more, this time hugging her tenderly, instead of squeezing the life out of her.  “I think I already am,” he admitted, stroking the back of her head.

She was smiling against him.   She liked what he was saying—very much.

After a very hearty, home cooked meal and a rather fulfilling family conversation during, Justin sat in the family room alone with his mom.  Cassidy was upstairs giving Cody a bath in Justin’s huge Jacuzzi tub and Paul was in the kitchen doing the dishes.  Tomorrow they were going to have dinner with his dad, his step-mom and his two little brothers.  Justin was just a tad nervous, but it didn’t ward off any of the strong feelings he was having towards the woman he’d fallen head over heels in love with—a feeling that was growing more and more apparent with every moment he was around her.

He wanted to talk to his mom about it and it seemed to be the perfect time as they sat just a short distance across from each other on the sofa.

“Momma,” he said, in a tone that revealed a deep discussion was on its way.  “Is it bad that I already feel like I want to spend the rest of my life with her?  Is it wrong that the word marriage is already floating around in my head?”

She smiled, all-knowingly.   “No, sweetheart.  It’s not bad or wrong to feel that way.  But I would strongly suggest waiting just a little bit before taking such a drastic leap.”

He nodded, understanding exactly.  “I know you’re right.  But I just feel like we’re this happy little family and it’s the best feeling in the world.  I don’t want them to go away,” he said softly.

“They’re not going anywhere, baby.  Cody is your son.   Nothing is going to change that.”

“Not just Cody, though.   You know what I mean.”

She did.  Of course she did.  Reaching out, she patted his knee affectionately.  “I like her—very much.”  Justin smiled at her approving words.  That was important to him.  “And I’ve got a good feeling about this, I do.”  That made him happy too.  “Just give it a little time.  You’ve gotta test the water before you jump in.  Things have been fairly easy so far.  Let’s see how things pan out after the news breaks.  When you guys get back home things are going to be different.  You know that.  You can’t hide in your houses forever.”

Cassidy stood just inside Justin’s bedroom door.  She’d heard every word of their discussion.  She hadn’t meant to.  She’d been on her way to get Cody’s clothes from his room when the word marriage had hit her ears like a force of nature.  Not that she was afraid of marriage.  Maybe she should have been, after the horrible one she’d just ended.  But she wasn’t.   

It had surprised her, because it was the last thing she’d expected to hear even if it was something that she wasn’t supposed to be listening to.  Of course she’d had to listen to the rest of the conversation after that.  She just stood there grinning, having a general appreciation for Lynn’s words of wisdom—and for the fact of hearing the woman’s admittance that she liked Cassidy “very much.”  That was always good to hear.

But now Justin was coming up the stairs and she had to pretend like she hadn’t heard a word of it.  Wiping away the smile on her lips, she opened the door just before he barged in, trying to act as if she’d just made way to it, on her way to get Cody’s PJ’s.  “You wanna sit with him while grab his jammies?” she asked.

“Of course,” Justin grinned.

She passed by, feeling guilty that she new things she wasn’t supposed to.  She felt bad for listening in on a private conversation he’d been having with his mother.  She’d never been one to hide things in a relationship and she knew that as awkward as it might be, that once she got back in the bathroom she was going to have to tell him that she’d heard.

So she grabbed Cody’s blue and green plaid pajama bottoms with matching solid blue shirt and returned to Justin’s giant bathroom, where she found him sitting on the edge of the white tile that surrounded the raised tub.

He had a goofy grin across his handsome face as he watched Cody sink a red plastic ship, making his own sound affects to go with it.  Letting her presence be known, she stood just a few steps away, closed her eyes and blurted it out.  “I heard,” she said.  “I heard you talking to your mom.  I’m sorry.”  Then she peeked out of her right eye, hoping to gauge his reaction.

“Okay,” he said with a bit uncertainty.  “I guess I should probably be a little embarrassed?”

She shrugged, opening both her eyes completely.  He was asking her how he was supposed to feel.  She didn’t know what to tell him.

“I guess I’m just more surprised that you’re admitting that you heard what you heard.  After that wears off, then maybe I’ll be embarrassed… I think.”

She half smiled.  “Please don’t be embarrassed, and I’m sorry for being so honest, but I just don’t want to hide stuff.  I hid something once and it was probably the worst mistake of my life.”  He’d have to be brain dead to not realize that she was referring to how she’d hid Cody from him. 

Justin’s eyes closed briefly, as an audible breath pushed out through his nose.  When his gaze returned it wasn’t focused on her, it settled instead on the little boy they’d created together—completely on accident, but so divinely on purpose.

It was amazing how oddly normal it all seemed.  For once in her life, Cassidy felt like she was right where she belonged.  She felt like she was with her family.

© BrandyRae 2005

Dinner with the Timberlakes was a little tense.  Justin’s father, Randy, was cordial to say the least, but Cassidy couldn’t help but feel he was a little skeptical about the whole situation.

For the life of her she couldn’t figure out why.  The paternity test had proven her honesty.  Her recent divorce settlement proved she wasn’t after Justin’s money.  Although maybe that was it, after all.  Not the money, but the divorce.  Maybe it was the baggage she carried that made Justin’s father wary.

Whatever it was, she didn’t let it bother her.  He was genuinely nice to her and to Cody.  He didn’t say one thing out of line or give even an inclination of inappropriate behavior.  Still, she got the feeling that he just wasn’t pleased with them being there.

Get the fuck over it was about the only thought she could come up with. 

Justin had given her a brief background on the relationship he had with his father on the way over for dinner.  The drive was fairly short, though, and didn’t allow for much.  Basically he’d told her that he and his father tried to stay close, but there had always been a bit of a strain on their relationship.  He also told her that it wasn’t going to be a lengthy visit.

She was glad, as they had been there for just under three hours and were now saying goodbye and heading out.  Justin hugged his step mom and his two younger brothers and they were out the door.

Before he’d even started the engine of the car, he was apologizing.  “That was kind of weird.  I’m sorry.”

“Don’t apologize.   They were perfectly nice,” she remarked.

He glanced over at her smugly as he pulled the car forward to head out of the circular drive.  “It’s not you,” Justin continued.  “It has nothing to do with you.  He’s mad at me.”

“Okay…” she said, a little unsure.

“In his eyes, I screwed up.  Luckily things turned out okay, but it could have been a very different situation and he’s pissed off at me for being irresponsible.”

“Well,” Cassidy shrugged.  “He’ll get over it eventually.”

Justin smirked and smiled loosely.  “Yeah, he will.”  Then he looked back at Cody, who was being awfully quiet.  “You awake back there, little man?” 

“Yep,” Cody answered surely.

“How ‘bout stopping for ice cream?” Justin asked.  Then he looked over at Cassidy.  “Mom, is that okay?”

She felt a quiet chuckle sneak from her mouth at the sound of him calling her mom.  “Sounds good to me.”

The ice cream shop was locally owned—no name brand chain like they would have found in L.A.  And the owners new Justin by name—most people did, of course—but this was in a completely different, non-celebrity, hometown kind of way.   It was charming, but it left Cody with lots of questions.

Mainly, how does the ice cream man know “my daddy”?  He’d left off the Justin part and that had made them both smile, although neither of them drew attention to it.

As they sat at a small round table, Cody and Justin both with mint chip cones and Cassidy with her plain vanilla in a cup, Justin explained to his son that he’d known these people ever since he was Cody’s age—that this is where he’d grown up.

More questions followed, along with a good laugh when Cody asked—completely innocent of course—if the ice cream he was eating had been there when his Daddy had been his age too. 

The joy of a four year old.   Cassidy and Justin were both grinning widely when they left.  The strain from dinner was long gone and Cody was clearly getting sleepy as he’d yawned a good three times in a row from the backseat.

Cassidy had been a little worried that he wouldn’t want to go to sleep at a decent hour because of the change in time zones, but he hadn’t had a nap and he’d had a pretty busy day.  Bedtime looked promising, after all.

When they got inside, Lynn and Paul were sitting in the living room, eating a late meal in front of the TV.  “How’d it go?” Justin’s mom asked.

Justin didn’t answer, but Cassidy didn’t miss the look he shot at her.

Cassidy smiled and put a hand to Cody’s shoulder.  “You wanna go give Grandma Lynn and Grandpa Paul hugs before we get ready for bed?” she asked him.

“Okay,” he said eagerly and trotted off towards them.

Watching Cody hug his new grandparents with a smile, Cassidy met up with her little boy again to take him upstairs.   “I’ll be there in a minute,” Justin told her.  She nodded with a grin.

Half an hour later, after Cody had been fully tucked in by both of his parents, Cassidy and Justin went back downstairs to visit with Lynn and Paul before turning in for the night.  The Harless’ made Cassidy feel quite comfortable in their home.  She was already very fond of them both.  But it had been a whirlwind 48 hours and it wasn’t too long before she was saying goodnight herself and heading off to bed.  Justin had told her he’d be up in a little bit.

When Justin finally made it up to bed, he wasn’t surprised to find Cassidy asleep.  It had been a good thirty minutes since he’d told her he’d be up in a few.  He’d been having a nice visit with his mom and Paul.  It wasn’t something he got to do too often. 

The door to his bedroom was partially open.  The TV was on—a rerun of The Real World Season 15, 16 or 17, he’d lost track a long time ago—and Cassidy was curled up on her side, sound asleep.  He smiled at the sight.  Their life had been crazy for the past few days.  He was pretty tired himself. 

Funny thing was—as much as he still wanted her, he didn’t look at her and immediately think sex.  Instead he was thinking about how he couldn’t wait to curl up with her, wrap his arms around her and just enjoy the fact that she was there beside him.

It was kind of crazy.  But it was also special.  Being that he was no stranger to love, or being in love, he recognized the feeling and welcomed it completely.  With a sentimental smile, he changed into a lone pair of cotton pajama pants and crawled into bed.  He scooted up behind her and slung an arm over her waist, burying his nose into the mess of hair at her neck. 

She shifted against him and her arm smoothed on top of his.  “Sorry I fell asleep,” she said groggily.

His hold on her tightened as he pulled her body up against him even more.  “It’s okay.  Don’t say sorry.”

She moaned subtly and took in a deep breath.  “You feel good,” she said, practically humming it.

He smiled against her.   “You feel good, too.”

“I like it here,” she told him.

“I like having you here.”

She shifted again, but this time she was turning in his arms. 

“Hey,” he said, brushing a hand down the back of her head as she settled against him, chest to chest.   “About last night, we never really talked about it and I just want you to know that—”

Her hand found his mouth, her thumb at his lips.  “You don’t have to try to explain.”

He bit at her thumb and she pulled it away.  “I want to say this,” he told her.

“Okay.”

“I just want you to know that I’m not planning to do anything crazy—like propose in the next 24 hours,” he smirked, trying to make light of it.  They hadn’t talked about it and he felt like they should.  He wasn’t exactly embarrassed, like he thought he might be.  But he definitely didn’t want to scare her away. 

Her thumb was at his mouth again, rubbing along his lips.  When it left, her lips replaced it.  She was humming again, and he only took that as a good sign.  But still, as much as he was enjoying her kiss, he felt like he needed her to say something.

Pulling back, he looked her straight in the eye.  “You didn’t say anything,” he said.

“What do you want me to say?” she asked.  “You said you’re not planning anything crazy.  I believe you.”

Lightly he shook his head.   That wasn’t what he meant.  “But did it freak you out?  What you heard me saying to my mom?”

The palm of her hand brushed against his cheek.  Her lips just a breath away.  “Nothing about what’s happening between me and you freaks me out.”  She smirked softly at her words.  “That freaks me out more than anything.”

Funny, he understood exactly what she meant.  “It freaks you out that you’re not freaking out?” he asked with a chortle.

“Pretty much.  Yeah.”

He let the hold he had on her squeeze her even tighter.  “I know exactly how you feel.”

“What is wrong with us?” she asked, shifting her face into the space between his cheek and his pillow.  

“We’re just in love, I guess.” 

Cassidy knew she was in love with him, but when he said it, it made her heart swell.  This indescribable feeling of utter joy welled up in her chest like a balloon on the verge of popping. 

His fingers stroked the back of her head before she pulled away enough to look at his handsome face.  There was so much written in those eyes and she wanted to learn it all.  “That is exactly why I should be freaking out,” she told him.

He grinned, wide and proud, his touch smoothing past her cheek, over her ear and down the side of her neck.  “We’re both barely divorced,” he said softly.

“Yeah, we should have some serious relationship issues right now.”

He smirked and nodded just once.  It seemed that they both knew what they should be feeling even if it was the exact opposite of how they truly felt.  It was the weirdest thing ever!

“I’m not usually so gung ho about getting into a relationship,” she said, her arm curled around his side as she snuck one of her knees in between his legs.  Laying with him felt so amazingly comfortable.  She couldn’t remember ever feeling so comfortable with Jason, and they had been married for almost two years, and dated for nearly four.  “But I can’t even imagine not being with you right now.”   That hadn’t been the easiest thing for her to admit, but he was being so open with his feelings and she felt the need to be too.   She was open about everything else.  There was no need to hold back now.

His lips curled into a smile as he pressed them to her forehead.  “Do you think because we have Cody that it makes what we’re feeling that much stronger?”

She nodded and tilted her chin up to look into his gray-blue eyes again.  “I do.  I don’t necessarily think that’s a bad thing, though.  As long as we’re not trying to be together just for him.”

He kissed her again, this time on the temple.  “I feel like I have been totally blessed to have found the both of you.  Seriously, like my life has done a complete 180 since I saw you that day at the game.  I am so thankful that my mom and Trace talked me into going that day,” he sighed quietly.

“You’re totally over her, though, right?” She’d wanted to ask for so long, but she hadn’t had the courage.  She felt like he was, but past relationships were always a little touchy—especially Justin’s.   She knew how bombarded he was by questions from everyone else.  She felt like she shouldn’t ask.  But she also knew she had to get past that if they really did want to have a serious relationship.

“It wasn’t losing her that I was so upset over.  It was the fact that I failed at something that I wanted so badly.”  He looked her straight in the eye as he spoke and it made his words so much more meaningful.  “Of course now I realize the reason that my marriage failed was because I had married the wrong person.”

She wasn’t sure if he was inferring that Cassidy was the right person, but either way a grin was at her lips.  It just seemed that he could say no wrong.  At any other time in her life she would have serious doubts about a man who said all the right things, but those doubts just weren’t there with Justin.  If he wasn’t being sincere, then she’d turn out to be the biggest fool in the world.  But that couldn’t be the case.  She knew he meant what he said.  She felt it in the very depths of her soul and beyond.

“What about you?  Are you completely over your ex?”

“Yes,” she answered stoutly.  “I fell instantly out of love with him the night he backhanded me across the cheek.”

Justin shot up so fast it startled her.  The look that clouded his eyes was one she’d never seen before, but she recognized it instantly as anger.  She realized at that moment she should have never told him, and she honestly hadn’t meant to.  It just sort of came out.  “He hit you?”

She felt very sheepish at the admittance.  “He did, once, and that’s when I left.”  She kept her voice very calm, hoping it would have the same affect on him.  But it wasn’t working.  He was kneeling on the mattress, trying so hard not to get upset.  His body was stiff, his hands clenching at his sides.

His chin dropped as he was visibly trying to let go of what he was feeling.  He brought a hand to his face and pinched the bridge of his nose.  Then he took in a couple of breaths and looked at her once again.   “I was in a car with him, Cassie.   I spoke to him, face to face, when I should have been beating the shit out of him.”

“Justin, calm down.   He’s paying for it—trust me.   He’ll get his.”

But that obviously wasn’t satisfactory to him.  “What kind of fucking coward hits his wife?”

Shaking her head lightly, she rose to her knees and scooted towards him.  “Look, there’s nothing you can do about it now.  You didn’t know me then.  You hadn’t seen me in years.  It’s part of the past.  It happened once.   I did not stand for it, obviously.  Now he is paying for it—big time, with his checkbook.”

Justin shook his head as his sight dropped between them.  He brought both hands to the side of his head.  “It is really a good thing that I am not in the same town as him right now,” he stated softly.

Something about his will to protect her played big on her heart.  As much as she wanted him to calm down, it felt good to see him so worked up over something that had happened to her months before.  Tugging on his arm, she pulled him back down on the bed.  He laid flat on his back and she curled up against him on her side, her head on his chest.  “That is the last thing you want in the tabloids,” she said.

“Right now I could give a fuck less about the goddamn tabloids.”

For some reason she was smiling, but she wasn’t letting him see it.  “You don’t mean that.  Promise me you won’t do anything crazy.”

“Like what?”

At that she did look at him, rather incredulously.  “Come on.   I know you have a lynch mob of muscle at your disposal.  If you really wanted to hurt him, it would only take a phone call.  I’m not stupid.”

His hand stroked her back.   “As much as I do want to hurt him right now.  I’m not about to stoop so low.  Besides, it wouldn’t give me enough satisfaction if someone else did it.”

She smirked at his words.   “I shouldn’t have told you.”

“No,” he disagreed firmly.  “You should have told me a long time ago.”

Cassidy was smirking again.   “When?”  she asked.  “When was I supposed to tell you?”

“I don’t know… just sometime before now.”

“It’s only been two and a half weeks since you found out about us.  It’s barely been one since we first had sex.  When was I supposed to tell you that I left my ex husband because he smacked me across the face?”

“Can you please stop saying it?” he asked.  Then he continued, “I don’t know, okay.  You just have no idea what hearing something like that does to a man—well, a decent man, anyway.  I suppose if I was a coward that hit his wife, too, then I wouldn’t care so much.”

Smoothing a hand down the center of his bare stomach, she climbed on top of him and kissed his mouth.  “Seeing you all worked up like this is really turning me on,” she mumbled against him.

His arms smoothed around her.   “You’re trying to distract me with sex,” he said.

She grinned wide.  “Damn, it was that obvious?”

He nodded, eyeing her purposely.  “Doesn’t mean it’s not working, though.”

Five days after they arrived in Millington, they were leaving.  Cassidy would have loved to stay longer, but they couldn’t hide forever.  Their lives needed to get back to some type of normal if they planned on having any sort of relationship.  Justin needed to get back to work, Cody needed to get back to Preschool—he’d already missed three weeks—and Cassidy needed to figure out if she was going to try and start up her career again.

So they boarded the private jet at nine a.m. Eastern Time.  They’d arrive just shortly after ten, Pacific Time.

It was a quiet flight.   Cody spent the time working on a couple puzzles that Grandma Lynn had bought him during one of their shopping trips.  Cassidy flipped through the current issue of Cosmopolitan while Justin spent most of the time on the phone, trying to get a feel for what things were like back at home.

Crazy.  He didn’t have to say it for her to know.

“That’s not even an option,” he said into the phone, Cassidy listening in whether she wanted to or not.   He was sitting right next to her.  “I am not going to exploit my son like that.”

“Mommy, what does ex-plote mean?” Cody looked up and asked.  Obviously he was listening to his daddy’s conversation, as well.

“Exploit,” she corrected his pronunciation, “and I’ll explain it to you later,” she said, knowing he’d forget about it in a minute.  She didn’t exactly feel like trying to explain.  It was too complicated for a four year old.  Or maybe it was just too complicated for her to try and put into words he’d understand.

Justin ended the call and looked over at her with a sigh. 

“What was that about?” she asked.

“People wants to put us on the cover—willingly, of course—and do an interview.”  He shook his head.  “No way.”

“What are your people saying?” 

He smirked, probably at the reference to “his people” but Cassidy didn’t know what else to call them.   “You don’t want to know.”

“They’re telling you to do it,” she guessed.

He nodded.  “That once the mystery is gone, the paparazzi won’t be hunting us so badly, but you and I both know that’s not true.  Especially once they find out who you are and who you just divorced.”

She closed her eyes for a moment.  She felt a headache coming on all the sudden. 

“I’m sorry,” he said, “I’m not trying to stress you out.”

“It’s not you that’s stressing me out,” she told him.

“Well, you can say that all you want,” he replied, “but if I wasn’t such a—” he growled, probably because he was holding back a curse, “media draw, then we wouldn’t be going through this problem right now.”

She turned her head to look at him.  “Well, if I hadn’t married one of the top NFL quarterbacks in the league then it wouldn’t be quite so bad, would it?  So you can’t put it all on yourself.  Can you?”

Half a smile graced his lips—those oh-so kissable, soft and smooth lips.  She found herself wanting them against her at that very moment, but she pushed the feeling aside.  Their affection for each other had gradually become more obvious in front of their son—a quick kiss here or a hug there.  But even so, kissing Justin the way she really wanted to, in front of their son, would definitely raise questions that he hadn’t yet felt the need to ask. 

Justin must have sensed her desire, as his half smile turned into a full smile just before he turned his attention to the little boy in the chair across from him and began a conversation about the puzzle Cody was working on.

Cassidy smiled wide as she watched the interaction.  At that moment she felt like nothing could come between them—not even the brigade of photographers that were waiting eagerly outside Justin’s home for his return.

© BrandyRae 2005

She smiled at the familiar man sheepishly as he held the back door open of a black Chevy Suburban.  She didn’t plan on embarrassing herself even more by mentioning the fact, but later, when she and Justin were alone, she was definitely going to have to say something about the familiar bodyguard.

Justin buckled Cody in his booster while the two-man security team loaded their few pieces of luggage.  Cassidy sat quietly in her seat as Justin slid in next to her.   Cody was sitting behind them, in the third row of seats.

There wasn’t much talk as they headed out of the small airport and on to the freeway.  Cassidy kept a constant watch out the darkly tinted window, wondering if the paparazzi were on to them yet.  They’d been on the road for maybe five minutes when Justin’s security guard—who’d been introduced as simply T—turned on the stereo.  Cassidy didn’t think anything of it, as she immediately recognized the catchy beat of a tune she hadn’t heard in quite a while.

It was when Justin’s head dropped, a very quiet “fuck” falling from his lips, that she realized something was up.   Her eyes darted forward to the two men in the front seats, looking completely nonchalant—and very guilty.  When the voice of the song joined the beat, she knew instantly.   She didn’t have to hear a word of it before the embarrassment set in. 

She’d been completely set up.  These two men had made a plan to purposely make her feel like an idiot.  She didn’t know whether to laugh or to cry.

Bowing her head, shaking it lightly back and forth, she tried to catch the gist of the song, but it was sung in a way that wasn’t exactly easy to understand—surely done on purpose considering what it was about.  What she did catch was part of the chorus, something about “turned me inside-out… that night… just shy of twenty four hours… she touched me oh-so right…” She could hardly bare to listen to it.  Her cheeks had never been so hot in her life, but she made sure to keep her head down so no one would see, although they undoubtedly knew anyway.  The song continued, mentioning the limo ride “of a lifetime” and “how she said good bye” and “vanished out of sight.”  There was so much more, but she just couldn’t absorb it.  Maybe if she’d been expecting to hear it at that very moment.  But considering she was in a car with two men she hardly knew—both who obviously knew very much about her.  Not to mention her 4 year old son in the backseat.  Thank God he had no idea!

Justin’s hand fell to her knee as he gave it a good squeeze, but the last thing she wanted was his sympathy and she shooed his touch away. 

“Alright, enough already.  Turn off the CD,” he told them.

They were laughing obviously as they did.  Cassidy buried her face in her hands.  She’d sort of forgot about the whole song issue.  She wished she’d been prepared before it had been shoved in her face—or ears, rather.

“And stop laughing,” he told them.

“We were just having a little fun,” T defended.

“Fun’s over.   Is this really the way you want to meet the mother of my son?”

Cassidy peeked upwards just in time to catch Dre looking backward.  “But we’ve already met,” he replied with a cocky smirk.

She stuck an arm in front of Justin before he could try to defend her honor any longer. She raised her head confidently.  “It’s fine,” she said firmly.  “I can take it.”

“See?” Dre remarked.

“Just remember,” she leaned forward hoping that Cody wouldn’t hear, “payback is a mother fucker.”

Both men laughed stoutly.   Dre turned back again looking at Justin and said,  “She’s cool, J.  She’s cool.”

Justin reached for her leg again.  This time she didn’t push him away.  “Sorry,” he whispered, with a goofy grin.  She just shook her head.  Cassidy was one to recover fairly quickly.  She was over it already.  But she would find a way to get them back—eventually.

They dropped Cassidy and Cody off first.  Justin walked them in and said a quick goodbye while Dre unloaded her suitcase.  She’d offered for him to come stay at her place for a few days and he’d happily accepted.

He honestly didn’t want to spend one night away from either of them.  He didn’t want to miss tucking Cody in goodnight and he didn’t want to wake up in the morning without Cassidy sleeping right next to him.  Of course he hadn’t told her that, but it was the truth.

They had so much to figure out still.  Their life was about to get crazy and he was afraid their whole world was going to change, especially Cody’s.  He wanted to shield his son from his lifestyle as much as possible, but he was afraid that just wasn’t possible.

When they finally pulled onto his street, he wasn’t surprised to find the scattered cars lining it.  It wasn’t quite as bad as it had been before he’d left, but once word spread that he was back home it would be soon.  He wasn’t too worried about it.  These people must have been crazy to think he’d take his son to his home right now. 

The thought made him sigh, somewhat disgruntled.  He didn’t want to have to hide his son.  He wanted to be able to spend time with him where ever he wanted.  The whole industry was fucking ridiculous these days.  It just kept getting worse and worse.

“Don’t worry, J.   These windows are too dark for them to get anything,” T remarked, obviously sensing Justin’s worries.

“It’s not that,” Justin told him.  “I mean it is, but it’s not me I’m worried about.”

Neither of the big men in the front responded.  Probably because there was nothing they could say.  They weren’t the type to fill his ears with hot air.  That was part of the reason they’d worked for him for so long.  They were part of the select few who didn’t try to blow smoke up his ass—unlike the majority of assholes in the industry.

Finally making his way inside the house—Dre and T hanging around until he was ready to leave again—Justin made way up to his office to check his answering machine.  It was a task he was dreading immensely. 

And that feeling doubled as he saw the digital read blinking 22 unheard messages.  “Jesus,” he breathed softly.  “Who the fuck has been calling that couldn’t call my cell phone?”   He shook his head and pressed the button.

At message seven he knew.   Five out of the seven had been from Macie.   The other two were hang ups—Macie.   Did she forget he had fucking Caller ID?   If there was one legitimate message in the bunch he’d be completely flabbergasted. 

“Why did you guys let me marry a fucking psychopath?” he called out rather loudly as he listened to message number nineteen.  “Justin, this is ridiculous.  Call me back.   I want to know what is going on!”   He just shook his head.  How was it any of her goddamn business?  They were divorced!

“You didn’t ask us first,” Dre remarked as he appeared in the doorway.  “What’s going on?”

“She left me like twenty-two messages.”

“Why didn’t she just call your cell phone?” Dre asked.

“Probably because she wasn’t that brave,” Justin smirked, shaking his head again.

“Are you gonna call her back?”

“Hell no.  Why should I?”

The bigger man shrugged his hefty shoulders.  “Just asking.”

“You know, a fucking month ago when I was depressed out of my mind, I couldn’t have paid her to pick up the phone and call me.  Now when I could give a shit less, she won’t stop.”  He shook his head again.  “Fucking women… I swear.”

“Well the one you’re with now doesn’t seem so bad,” Dre smirked.  Then he turned and walked a way, leaving Justin with a rather wide grin across his face.  Nope, he thought, she’s definitely not bad—at all.

Cassidy decided to go grocery shopping before Justin came back.  She called her neighbor’s daughter to watch Cody.  Grace was sixteen and she’d watched Cody many times for Cassidy.  She was schooled at home, so she was usually available, and unlike many of the teenagers in Beverly Hills, she was actually responsible.  Plus she adored Cody, which was always a plus.

Maybe it seemed rather paranoid to not want to take Cody to the grocery store, but Cassidy was afraid that he might notice Justin on the cover of one of the tabloids at the checkout and start asking questions.   That wasn’t something she was ready to deal with. 

Cassidy was ready and waiting when Grace’s high-dollar BMW pulled up outside the gate.  She quickly buzzed the girl in and grabbed her purse.  “Mommy will be back in an hour or so,” she told Cody.  “You behave for Grace, okay?”

“Okay, Mommy.  Is Daddy coming back with you?” Cody asked curiously.

Cody smiled at the notion.   “No, he’ll be here in a few hours.   Okay?”

“Okay,” Cody answered.  “I think I’ll draw him another picture.”

She leaned down and kissed his head.  “I think that’s a great idea,” she smiled, just as Grace was knocking on the front door.

With a grin she let the girl inside, told her she’d be back in an hour or so and to call her on her cell if she needed anything.  Grace new the drill.  With all said and done, she was out the door and on her way.

Cassidy was just about finished with her shopping when she got a call from Justin on her cell phone.  “Where you at?” was the first thing out of his mouth.

“At the grocery store,” she answered, making one last trip down the frozen food aisle.

“Mmmm, what’s for dinner?” he asked.

With a chuckle she asked, “Are you hungry already?”

“I haven’t had lunch yet,” he said.

“Well, eat something,” she told him.

“T just went out to get some food.  Anyway, I was just calling to say hi,” he announced rather sappily.

“Hi,” she said with a giggle.

“Do you miss me?” he asked.

“Terribly,” she answered, a bit sarcastically.

“You’re just saying that,” he said. 

“Maybe.”

“Alright, well, I’m almost done here.  I should be over in an hour or two.”

“I’ll be waiting with bells on,” she teased, finally heading up to the checkout.

“I’d rather you be waiting with nothing on, but that’s just me.”

The smirk she’d started to let out turned into a groan as she noticed the array of gossip magazines staring her in the face. 

“What?” he immediately asked.

“Oh nothing.  I’m just at the checkout so I better get off here.”

“Oh,” he obviously read her mind.  “I know.   I’ve seen ‘em all.  Just ignore it.” 

It was kind of hard to ignore headlines that read Did Justin leave Macie to secretly reconcile with the mother of his illegitimate child?  “Bullshit,” she said softly as she absorbed the nasty print.

“No, really I have.   No bullshit,” he replied.

“I didn’t mean you,” she smirked.  “Sorry.”

He chuckled quietly.  “Yeah, I know.  Okay, I’ll let you go.  I’ll see you soon.”

“Alright, bye.”  

She heard his quick “bye” and hung up the phone, slipping it back into her purse.  What would the press come up with next? she thought.

When Justin finally climbed into the car—T and Dre chauffeuring as they would be on full duty for awhile until things calmed down—it was nearly four in the afternoon.  As the car stopped at the end of the drive, waiting for the electronic gate to open, their situation immediately worsened.

“Shit.”

Justin looked up from his phone—he’d just finished sending Cassidy a rather sexy text message telling her he was on his way—to see what exactly his security guard was sighing about.  It was worse than he thought.  He’d figured it was just some paparazzo asshole. 

Wrong. 

It was Macie.

Her Land Rover was just pulling up the outside of the drive.  Both cars faced each other, nearly bumper to bumper.

“Fuck,” Justin groaned.  “What does she want now?”

“I’m backing up,” T said.  “The last thing you want is for this to go down outside the gate.”

Justin’s hands fisted into what little hair he had, as a ball of frustration formed in his chest.  He wanted to scream he was so pissed off.  Or maybe punch the back of the seat.  Something!  He just wanted to get to his son and his girlfriend.  Not deal with his crazy ex-wife. 

Girlfriend.  Even in the midst of his anger he realized it was the first time he’d thought of her using that term.  Things had just happened so quickly he hadn’t had the chance.  He’d contemplated marriage with her already, but referring to her as his girlfriend?  It hadn't even happened inside his head up until that point.

But he didn’t have to time to get lost in thought.  Macie was storming out of her car at that very moment—shaggy blond hair swooshing against her cheeks with each angry step—the electric gate barely shutting behind the rear bumper of the too-big-for-her-little-ass SUV.

“I’ll handle this.”  Justin sighed loudly and hopped out of the car.  His hands went up questionably as he shot an angry glance toward her.  “What?”  He asked with a shout.  Her blue eyes were shooting daggers.  Her fists were clenched at her side.  It was a look he’d never quite seen, which was surprising considering all the shouting matches they’d been through. 

When she didn’t give him a response, he asked the question again, even louder this time.  “WHAT?”

Dre and T had got out of the car and were two steps behind her, but it didn’t seem to matter.  The movement happened so fast and so unexpectedly that he didn’t have a chance to block it. 

With a quick pop, his world darkened in a blink as a bolt of pain shot up the bridge of his nose and straight up into his head.  He fell back onto the pavement, landing square on his butt as blood trickled at first and then poured out of his nostrils and onto his white t-shirt. 

He managed a gurgled “Fuck” as he grabbed the source of the pain, his fingers bloodying instantly.  

She’d broke his fucking nose with one swift punch of her fist that he was realizing had been covered in four bulky and sharp jeweled rings.  In the haze of it all—T holding her back while Dre was rushing to his aid—he realized she’d come with only one purpose and that she’d managed to succeed.  "You can thank my trainer for that, asshole," she said with an angry shout.

Why did she have to be one of those actors that did all her own stunts? 

Forty-five minutes after Cassidy received Justin’s message, she started to wonder what was taking so long.   She was excited to see him even though she’d barely left him that morning.  Especially after the rather tempting words he’d sent to her—something about a promise of a full body rub-down, one she was looking forward to quite eagerly.  The thought of his hands all over her body got her warm in an instant. 

“Mommy?  Is daddy going to be here soon?”  Cody was working on drawing number two as he looked up from the table and asked the question.

“He should be here anytime,” she told her little boy. 

She decided to give him a call.  The phone rang about three times before there was an answer.  But the husky voice that came through definitely wasn’t Justin’s.  “Dre?  Or T?” she asked.

“Dre,” he answered.

“It’s Cassidy,” she told him.

“I know.”

“Everything okay?” she asked instinctively.  If Justin wasn’t answering his phone that must have meant something was going on.

She heard Justin’s muffled voice cursing in the background, then he was on the phone, but something was definitely not right.  “Hey,” he said.  His voice was weird.  He sounded all plugged up.

“Where are you?” she asked, concern washing over her.

He smirked, at least it came out like he’d tried to smirk. 

“Are you okay?” she asked.

“I’m fine.”   But she knew instinctively that he wasn’t.  She detected a sense of pain coming through his voice, along with the fact that he sounded like he had a really bad cold.  “I’ll be there in about twenty minutes.  I had to make a stop.  I’ll explain it to you when I get there.”

“Justin, you are not fine.  I can tell.”

“I am,” he assured with little conviction.  “I promise.   I’ll see you soon.”  He didn’t wait for her goodbye.  He hung up.

Twenty minutes turned into forty before his car finally pulled up her drive.  Immediately she rushed out of the house, Cody right on her heels.  “Daddy!  Daddy!”   He was chanting, holding both of the pictures he’d drawn in his hands.

When Justin finally appeared out of the backseat her eyes widened with shock.

“Daddy!  You got beat up?” Cody asked before Cassidy even had a chance to think it.  His nose was taped and gauze was stuffed up both his nostrils. Underneath the bandages he was all black and blue and most definitely scratched up.  How in the hell? She thought.  He’d been at home.  God, he hadn’t gotten into it with the paparazzi, had he?

She rushed to him, concern stamped across her face.  “What the hell happened?  Please tell me you didn’t get into it with one of the photographers outside your house.”

Dre was chuckling behind them as he slung a large duffle bag over his shoulder.

“I wish,” Justin remarked quietly.  Obviously it was painful to speak.  “That would be a little easier on my ego.”  Reaching for Cody’s head, he ruffled the boys hair affectionately before accepting the two drawings that were being held out to him.  “Daddy’s okay, bud.  Don’t worry.”  Then he looked back up at Cassidy.  “Come on.   Let’s go inside.”

Cassidy assumed Dre and T would be dropping his stuff and leaving, but obviously that wasn’t the case as they followed them inside and shut and locked the door.  She must have looked at them kind of funny, because T was suddenly explaining.  “We have some things to go over then we’ll be out of your hair,” he said.

She nodded and led them to the casual living room.  “Do you need ice or something?” she asked Justin.

Justin shook his head no and then cringed noticeably at the pain the movement caused. 

“The doc gave him some pain meds,” Dre answered as Justin, Cassidy and Cody all sat down rather closely on the sofa.  It seemed both Cassidy and her son needed to be attached to his side at the moment. 

“Is someone going to tell me what happened?” She was trying not to get upset.  Trying to hold back the overwhelming urge to take care of the man she was falling in love with, because at that very moment two very burly men were making themselves comfortable in her living room and hanging on her every movement.  She’d wait to dote over him until their moment of privacy.

“It was Macie,” Justin finally revealed.

“Who’s Macie, Daddy?” Cody asked curiously.

“Cody, sweetheart, Mommy and Daddy need to talk for a few minutes.  Why don’t you go up to your room and play for a little bit?  Okay?  I’ll come get you when we’re done.”

With disappointment he nodded.  “After that we can watch Tarzan together.  Okay, buddy?” Justin managed, patting the boys knee affectionately.  He’d placed the two drawings on the coffee table when he’d sat down.

“Okay,” Cody said rather glumly before scurrying off towards the stairs.

“He’s been waiting to see you all day,” Cassidy told.  Then she looked over at the two men that served as Justin’s security.  “Please explain,” she told them, placing a hand to Justin’s thigh.  “Don’t talk,” she said to him.  “Just listening to you talk makes me in pain.”

Thankfully he didn’t argue.

“We were just leaving when she pulled up.  Justin got out to talk to her and T and I were right behind her when she just pulled back and punched him square in the face without one word.  She was wearing a fistful of fucking hefty-ass rings, too.  Obviously she had a plan when she got there.”

“Does she need to be on medication, or what?” Cassidy asked, flabbergasted by the whole thing and still trying her best to stay calm when really all she could think about was hunting the girl down and smacking the bitch. 

“Tell her about the phone calls,” Justin muttered as he sank into the sofa and tilted his head back.  He brought both hands to his temples and rubbed.  Cassidy gave his thigh another good squeeze for support.

“She left about twenty some messages on his answering machine while you guys were in Tennessee,” Dre continued.

Cassidy just shook her head, she had no idea what to think about it all.  But she certainly dreaded the time when they’d all meet face to face.  Cassidy knew firsthand that fighting wasn’t the answer, but she’d be lying if she said she hadn’t been part of a scuffle or two.  Of course that had been a very long time ago and not circumstances that she had any desire to repeat.  Still, the urge to defend her man was stronger than she’d ever experienced.  “This is fucking ridiculous.  I’m in shock.  I cannot believe—” She stopped herself mid-sentence.  “Did you press charges?”

Justin shook his head no as he kept it back, still staring up towards the ceiling.

“It would have only made things worse,” T said.  “Then the whole thing would have been public record.”

“Is it wrong that I want to kill her right now?” Cassidy said stoutly. 

Justin managed a smirk this time.  “Now you know how it feels,” he said.  There was no need for him to say anything more.  She knew exactly what he was referring to and now she knew exactly how he’d felt.

© BrandyRae 2005

Dre and T went over some basic guidelines security-wise before leaving.  As soon as they were out the door, Cassidy found herself pacing back and forth behind the family room sofa where Justin was lying down lengthwise, Cody kneeling on the floor beside him.   Tarzan had just started to play on the TV, although no one was paying attention to it.  Justin’s eyes were closed as his son quietly inspected the swollenness of his face.  The boy had at least a dozen questions he wanted to ask, but he’d been instructed to keep quiet because “Daddy had a headache.”  It was obviously very difficult for him, as Cody was practically biting his lip to keep from inquiring.

“Stop pacing. You’re making me dizzy.”  Justin opened one eye to look at her over the back of the couch.  She stopped and braced both her hands on it. 

“The more I think about it, the more pissed off I am,” Cassidy admitted before exhaling a rather deep breath.

Justin’s eyes closed again as he spoke in a low grumble.  “There’s nothing you can do about it.  I’m fine.  Trust me, I’ve been through much worse.”

Gritting her teeth, she looked up toward the ceiling.  “I know that,” she spoke rather stubbornly.  “But she hit you.”

He grinned, the pain instantly visible as he wiped the expression away poignantly.   “Ouch,” He groaned softly to himself.  Then requested for her to, “Come sit down.  Please.”

“Mommy?   Is daddy out of commission now?” Cody’s speech finally broke through as he uttered a question that caught them both off guard.

The expression she exuded could only be construed as flabbergast, as Cassidy wondered where in the world her son had learned such a term.  Justin simultaneously let out a loud smirk that was instantly succeeded by another pain-filled, drawn-out “owe.”

With a chuckle Cassidy lifted Justin’s feet from one end of the sofa so she could sit down underneath.  “Daddy will be fine,” she told her son as he moved to stand just in front of her, staring with curious eyes.  Lovingly she raked a hand through his head of blond curls.  “He is definitely not out of commission.  Do you even know what that means?” she asked.

His head shook back and forth.

“Well, I don’t think it’s something you should be saying,” she told him.

“Okay,” he agreed half-heartedly. 

With a quiet sigh, Cassidy tilted her head.  “Are you getting hungry?” she asked her little boy.

“Yes.”

She wasn’t expecting the answer in stereo.  Her sight floated up the length of Justin’s torso.  “You’re hungry too?” she asked, but as soon as her eyes landed on his swollen nose the anger she’d managed to contain momentarily shot back up again, ten-fold.

Justin was answering her question with an “mmmm” and a subtle nod, but she was too busy seeing red to absorb it.

“Cody, sweetheart, why don’t you go upstairs and get that new set of books grandpa sent you to show Daddy.” 

Her quick thinking worked as her little one hopped up with an excited “okay” and scurried out of the room. 

Justin pulled himself upright and looked at her with the most curious expression he could muster under the circumstances.  “That’s cool.  Your dad sends him books?”

Cassidy’s head shook as she closed her eyes.  She couldn’t stand to look at him anymore.   It was making her too angry.  She hadn’t felt such rage in—longer than she cared to remember.  She’d done a really good job at checking her temper since she’d become a mom.  The last thing she wanted was for her little boy to see her explode.  She felt on the verge of a massive eruption.

Calmly she flattened her palm to the top of his knee, as he’d just curled one of his bare feet under the opposite thigh.  “Justin, I am so fucking pissed off right now.   I haven’t felt like this in—”

“Hey…” His voice was calm as his hand closed over the top of hers.  “Calm down.   Okay?”

Her head shook again.  She wasn’t arguing.  It was an automatic reaction.   “I’m trying,” she said through gritted teeth.  “I feel like I—Like I need to go kick her ass, or something.”

Quietly he chuckled and her eyes instantly popped open.  “I love that you’re so eager to defend me,” he said with a quirky grin.  She forced her focus away from him in an obvious fashion.  She knew he was trying to calm her down, but it wasn’t working.  “Hey, shit happens,” he added when she didn’t give him a response the first time.

She let her eyes meet with him then, wide and clear.  “I don’t like it when people fuck with my family,” she stated firmly.

His quirky grin turned instantly sentimental.  “Family… we are family, huh?”  

If it weren’t for the mushy tone to his voice, she might have feared that she’d said something she shouldn’t have, but it was obvious he was taken to the idea.   Still, the only answer she could manage was, “Well… yeah.”   Sort of like—duh.

His fingertips brushed along her jaw as his lips pressed into her cheek as best they could, considering the state his face was in.  “I like that,” he said softly.   Then he pulled back and said, “Ouch.”

Just then Cody came charging back into the room, his arms filled with three hardback books that he was obviously having a hard time keeping hold of.  “What’cha got there, little man?” Justin asked, scooting just enough to make room for Cody in between the two of them.  He patted the vacant spot on the sofa and the little boy eagerly climbed up.

And just like that Cassidy was instantly calm.  She still hated what had happened, but that verge of an outburst was gone and instead she felt herself grinning at the sight of the family she’d always really wanted without ever really knowing it.

Just before dinner Justin decided to take some of the pain medication that the doctor had given him.  Thirty minutes after they ate, he was out cold on the sofa.  Cassidy and Cody spent some quality time together, coloring in one of Cody’s many coloring books, then watching a little TV before it was time for bed.  Snuggled up in a pair of flannel PJ’s, the little boy trotted down the stairs ahead of his mom.  “Slow down,” Cassidy called out to him in her warning voice.

When she got into the family room, where they’d left Justin sacked out on the couch, she found Cody climbing on top of him, gently nudging one of Justin’s shoulders while he carefully inched in close to the bigger man’s face.  “Daddy,” the boy whispered softly, studying his father with an obvious amount of concentration.  When Justin didn’t budge, Cody whispered it again, only louder.

“Daddy’s asleep,” Cassidy finally said, stepping up behind the sofa.

“No I’m not,” Justin sounded groggily.  Then his arms came up around Cody’s small frame and squeezed him tight to his chest.  “You ready for bed, big guy?”

The question was answered with a healthy yawn.  Cassidy smiled, feeling more sentimental than she had all day.  There was nothing that could even come close to comparing with the feeling of watching her little boy with his dad.  It was something she’d longed for without even realizing it.  That was, until she’d been met with it face to face.  It was the best feeling in the world, feeling the love that had harbored between the two almost instantly.  She felt incredibly thankful for how her life was going at the moment.  And Cody’s life too.

Cody’s head bobbed against Justin’s chest.  “Uh huh,” he finally answered.

“You sleep tight, okay?  I love you.”

Hearing that warmed her heart even more.  “I love you too, daddy.”

She watched as Justin’s rubbed Cody’s back while giving him one more good squeeze.   “Okay, go with Mommy.  I’ll see you when you wake up.” 

Justin pushed his heavy frame up off the couch enough to watch his little boy and the woman he was falling head over heels in love with disappear up the staircase.  His eyes felt incredibly heavy and he knew it was from the pain meds.  But the pain in his face was gone and that was definitely a good thing. 

As much as he was glad to see the pain gone, he wished he hadn’t taken the meds.   He felt like he’d missed out while he’d been asleep.  He didn’t want to miss things ever again.  Collapsing back down, he stared up at the high ceiling, an overly expensive version of a ceiling fan whirling slowly above.  For some reason it made him think of Cassidy’s ex husband.  It was one of those things that just didn’t seem like her.  He knew that she enjoyed the finer things in life—he did too so there were no complaints about that—but some things were just over the top and ridiculous, like paying a grand for a ceiling fan when you could get a perfectly decent one for one tenth of the price at Home Depot.  Obviously he had no idea how much the fan had cost, but it just had expensive written all over it.

The thought made him wonder how she’d ever wound up with Jason Brown.  For some reason Justin felt a little bit to blame.  He wasn’t sure why because it definitely wasn’t him that hadn’t tried to get in touch with her.  He’d tried everything possible before he’d gotten himself into his own awful mess of a relationship with Macie.  Even after he and Macie had started dating he’d sort of tried to find her.  Whenever he’d run into someone in the sports media industry he always found himself asking about her.  Of course he’d never got any leads from his questions.  If he had, he’d have known about Cody a long time ago and maybe they’d both have been saved from two horrible marriages.

Taking a big sigh, he blamed his weird string of thoughts on the pain meds.  His mind was going haywire.  One thing for sure, though, his body was completely relaxed.

When Cassidy finally returned she was wearing a pair of those cute but sexy drawstring pants that seemed to hug her ass just right.  He figured she must’ve owned every color available, this particular pair bright white.  Her upper half was barely covered in a super thin white tank—no bra, the dark shading of her half-dollar-sized areolas visible through the sheer material, much to his satisfaction.

Instantly he was aroused.  Too bad he was also perfectly aware of the affects the pain meds would have on his libido.  Sex probably wasn’t the best idea at the moment.   Not unless she wanted it to last for hours on end.

Damn.

From now on he’d deal with the pain.  It wasn’t that bad.

Unfortunately that wasn’t helping his situation at that very moment, as she slithered up against him on the couch.  “How you feeling?” she asked.

“Looped and horny,” he answered honestly.

Her grin was wide.  Her eyes dancing with suggestion.  “Really?”

Justin smirked.  “Yes, but it’s not exactly a good combination.”  He curled an arm around her as she hugged close to his side, fitting in between his body and the back of the couch.

“Why is that?”

“The meds.”

“Ohhh…   You mean the whole desensitizing thing?”

He brushed a hand down the back of her head.  “Yeah, that.  And you just had to come back down here looking all hot.”  He closed his eyes briefly.   “I think you’re trying to torture me.”

“I was just getting comfortable,” she defended.

He smirked as he reached down to reposition his now full-on and uncomfortable erection.   Her hand followed his, taking over once his left.  Before he could protest, she was unzipping his fly, the warmth of her palm against his flesh, soothing to say the least.  “I really don’t think you understand what you’re getting yourself into,” he warned.

“Actually I do,” she replied, her eyes on his face as she smoothed her touch up his shaft.   “I’ve dated an injured athlete or two.”

“Didn’t need to know that,” he quipped quickly.

“Sorry.”   She pressed one hot kiss to the underside of his jaw, then another to his neck.   “I wanna make you feel better,” she told him, her voice sultry and soft.

“Just being with you makes me feel better.”

“Yeah, but that’s not what I mean.”  His delayed senses didn’t register her body slipping down the length of him until her breath hit his skin, just before the warmth of her mouth took him in.

As good as it felt, he realized if it weren’t for the fucking pain medication it would feel even better.  Dammit.

“Cody’s asleep right?” he thought to ask.  The last thing he wanted was for his son to come downstairs and witness what they were doing.

Her answer was a hum of a yes as she didn’t even bother to stop what she was doing, which was just fine by him.  Between the pleasure of what she was doing and the grogginess from the medication, he was completely in a fog.  Definitely very vulnerable.   Not that he cared about that one damn bit.  Not with her.  With her he felt safer then anywhere.

Very softly her teeth scraped his tip and he automatically groaned in response.  Damn, maybe she’d be able to get him to overcome the side affects from the meds after all.  

One thing for sure, she just didn’t stop.  Every time he thought she was going to, sure that she had to be getting worn out, she managed to come back even stronger, gradually pushing him closer and closer to the edge.  But still, release seemed miles away.  It was frustrating being so completely close, but so regrettably far. 

He lifted himself up, resting on his elbows, so he could get a better look at her.   “Baby, you can stop.  It’s okay.”  He wasn’t sure how long it had been, but he knew it had been longer than it normally would take—a lot longer.

She did, sinking her teeth into the flesh just below his hip bone instead.  Then her dark brown eyes looked up at him with determination.  “I’m not stopping until you come.”  Her moist lips were on him again and he suddenly felt extremely guilty.  Placing a hand to the side of her head, he nudged her up, glad that she obliged.

Straddling him, she rose up to meet him face to face.  He slipped a hand down the back of her pants as she leaned towards him.  “Let me get you off, instead,” he suggested.

She shook her head no and gently kissed his bottom lip.

“Fuck,” he cursed.  “Why did I take those fucking pain killers?  That was just stupid.”

“You took them because you were in pain.  It wasn’t stupid.”

“I’d rather be in pain then have you work so fucking hard.”

“Who said it’s hard work?” she said with a sly grin, easing back downwards.

“Uh uh,” he told her.  “Get back up here.”  He had doubts that she’d comply and he was right.  She did exactly the opposite as he’d requested and once again she was working on his pleasure instead of her own.  But this time, he realized instantly, resolution didn’t feel so far off.  In fact, it was mere seconds that he knew it was actually going to happen.

His breath heightened as he felt his body tensing.  It was obvious that she realized too because the drive she had to pleasure him quadrupled—and it had been damn strong before.  “Shit.  Stop,” he told her, so close to release but knowing he’d rather her get something out of it too.  But she wasn’t listening to him.  She just kept going, her mouth devouring him, his entire body on the verge of explosion.  “Shit.  Shit.  Shit.  Get your ass up here and let me fuck you.”

But it was too late, release eminent, not that she was giving in anyway.  The earth shook, the waves crashed, the entire universe exploded and all he could do was grunt and pant and breath as she took every bit of what he had to offer.

When she looked up at him, her expression was one of complete accomplishment.  “Damn,” he sighed, still breathing heavy.  “You will get yours.”  With a smirk she covered up the parts of his body that had been exposed.  The pulse of ecstasy wasn’t quite gone yet and he was still breathing hard. 

Cassidy hopped off the couch.  “We’ll see.”

“No.”   He sat up.  “You will.  Trust me.”

He heard her shoot back a response, but couldn’t make out what it was as she disappeared into the closest bathroom. 

Flopping his bare feet onto the floor, he leaned forward and rested his head in hands.  “Fuck,” he whispered softly to himself, the affects of the meds still lingering but not nearly as strong as before.  The throb in the bridge of his nose was starting to return, but thankfully he was still reeling from the endorphins of his orgasm.  He could give a goddamn less about the pain in his face at the moment.

His eyes locked on to his pants, still unzipped, and he reached down and fastened them.   “Hey, you want some ice cream?” she called from the other room.

She’d just given him the blow job from hell and now she was getting him ice cream.  Was this woman for real?  “Yeah,” he called back.

When she returned moments later, she had two bowls.  One heaping for him and one much smaller for herself.  It was mint chip, one of his favorites.  Damn she was good.

“Thanks,” he told her, spooning the first bite.

“You’re welcome.”  Her first bite was quarter the size of his.  For some reason he found it hard to turn away as the spoon smoothed between her tempting lips. 

“Can I move in with you?” 

A quiet smirk seeped from her lips as Cassidy turned to look at him.  “Are you serious?”  She didn’t think he was.  That was kind of a fast move, if you asked her.  But she also realized he was acting a little goofy, because of the Vicodin, no doubt.  She’d had her fair share of experience being around men on pain killers, thanks to the industry she’d been in. 

He shook his head no.  “You’re fucking amazing, I think.”

She was grinning even wider.  It might be considered wrong to pursue the conversation any further while he was under the influence—of anything.  “Well, I think you’re pretty amazing yourself,” she replied before taking another bite of her chilly dessert.  And that was the truth.  But there was something else that she’d been thinking about running by him and she wasn’t sure if it was the right time to bring it up or not, but she was going to anyway.  “There’s something I want to talk to you about,” she told him.

“What?” he asked, his mouth full.

“Did you want Cody to take your last name?”

His smile told her everything.  Of course he did.  “Well, yeah.  I do.   I mean, I hadn’t thought about it with everything else going on, but yeah, of course.”

Cassidy was smiling too.  She wanted it to be official.  “I’ll call my attorney tomorrow and get that all set up.”

“Maybe eventually you’ll take my name, too,” he remarked casually, still shoveling ice cream into his mouth.  He obviously hadn’t even realized what he’d just said.

“Justin.”

“Huh?” he asked, his attention focusing on her casually.

“You’re loopy.”

He nodded.  “It’s starting to wear off a little bit.”  Apparently he still hadn’t realized what he’d said.  Or perhaps he’d already forgot.   “You know, once Cody has my name we really won’t be able to shield him from the media anymore.”

“That’s inevitable,” Cassidy remarked.

“This is true.”  He raised his empty spoon as he spoke.  Cassidy was thoroughly enjoying this dingy side of Justin.  But she realized that she hadn’t really found a side of him yet that she didn’t enjoy.

© BrandyRae 2005

Cassidy was nervous.  She was dropping Cody off at school for the first time in almost a month and things had changed quite a bit since the last time.  Of course the biggest change this particular morning was that Dre was chauffeuring them.  Justin had wanted to come along, but they decided that was too risky.  He’d been camped out at Cassidy’s house for the past week.  And for that entire week they’d managed to keep Cody out of the press.

Preschool was going to be the big test.  There was no reason for anyone to know this first morning, but after Cody started spilling to all his little friends and the teachers about his newfound daddy, tomorrow could be a completely different story.  Word travels fast in tinsel town, even when it involves the Pre-K level. 

Several offers had come in from different magazines trying to buy the rights to the exclusive story on Justin Timberlake and his son.  It was ridiculous the amounts of money they were offering just to get the first dibs on it.  Cassidy would stand behind whatever decision Justin came up with.  He really wanted her input, but ultimately it was his career that could falter because of bad press.  As long as their little boy wasn’t in any danger—which she was sure Justin would never put him in—then she was fine with it.  It was obvious to Cassidy that Justin was waiting for her to tell him what she wanted him to do, but that just wasn’t how she operated.  Cassidy trusted Justin and she trusted his judgment.

She was also very good at dealing with reality.  And the reality was that sooner or later Cody’s face was going to be put out for public scrutiny and there wasn’t a damn thing either of them could do to stop it.  Honestly, she was beginning to feel like they should just go ahead and do the story, just to get the madness over with.

Justin had mentioned that if they did sit down with one specific media outlet, that any proceeds would go straight into a college fund for Cody.  Cassidy liked that idea.  She liked the fact that Justin was thinking first of their son’s future.  It made her feel all warm and fuzzy inside.  But a lot of things about the little family they were building did that.

Pulling into the parking lot of Cody’s Preschool—one that had more than a few celebrity kids on its roster—Cassidy took in a deep breath.  She noticed Dre reaching for the door handle and knew instantly that if he walked them in it would definitely get noticed.  “I think we can go in by ourselves,” she told him.

He looked back at her warily and let out a rather debatable huff.  Obviously he wasn’t sure about the idea.  “You do remember those security guidelines we’ve been over several times?”

“Yes.   Very much so.  But I also know that if you go in there with us it’s going to be the talk of the entire school for the rest of the week.  If not longer.”

“Okay, fine.  But try not to take too long.”

“I’ll be as quick as possible.”  She didn’t really want to stick around and explain why Cody had missed so much school anyway.

After helping Cody out of his booster seat, mother and son walked hand in hand to the front door.  “I can’t wait to tell everyone about my Daddy,” Cody remarked as Cassidy opened the entrance for him.

“I know you can’t,” Cassidy replied.

“Do you think Daddy will pick me up?”

Cassidy signed him in at the front desk, grinning at the head teacher who was on the phone behind the desk.  “I think he will be at home waiting for you afterwards,” she told her little boy.

They got to his classroom and Cassidy was instantly relieved to see that the teacher was involved in another conversation with a high profile parent.  Someone much more recognizable than Cody’s as-of-yet unidentified father.  The woman wouldn’t dare walk away from that to talk with Cassidy—thank God. 

Cassidy bent down, kissed her little boy and told him goodbye.  Then waved to the teacher across the room and left.

Picking him up wouldn’t be near as easy.

It was a short drive back to the house, maybe ten minutes tops.  Altogether she and Dre had only been gone for maybe 25 minutes.  They pulled up the drive and Cassidy found herself wondering what she and Justin would do all day with Cody gone.  Rarely they had time away from him.  It might almost be kind of weird.  Would they actually get to experience what a normal, adult relationship felt like?  She doubted it.   There time would be consumed with—something.  She was sure of it.

“You coming in?” she asked Dre.

He shook his head no.  “I’ll be back later.”

“Okay.   I’ll see ya later then.”  With that she hopped out of the car and went inside the house.  She expected to find Justin on the phone, either in the kitchen or in the downstairs office, because that’s where he was most of the time during the day.  So when she didn’t find him in the first place, she immediately looked in the second.  She didn’t find him there either.

“Justin?” she called out.

“I’m upstairs!”

Trotting up to the second story, she heard that the radio was on, but even more enjoyable was the fact that he was singing along with it.  It was something very popular at the moment, although she couldn’t quite place the name of the song or who sung it.  She was terrible with that stuff.

The fantasy in her mind found him freshly out of the shower with nothing but a towel wrapped around his tautly firm waist, moisture from the steamy water still apparent on his blemish-free skin. 

Unfortunately that wasn’t the case.  He was completely dressed—and dressed for one thing in particular. 

Golf.   Casual golf, but definitely golf—collared shirt, plaid shorts, golf shoes set out neatly on the floor just waiting to be put on.

“Going somewhere?” she asked.

He turned swiftly on his socked feet.  “Yes.  For some much needed relaxation.   Care to join?”  The question was asked by his entire being, not just his voice, as he tilted his head and stared with hopeful eyes.

Like she’d ever turn him down when he asked like that.

Chewing on her bottom lip, she tried her best to fight off the grin she felt creeping to her lips.   “Are we actually playing or just hitting balls at the range?”

“I didn’t think we had time for much more than the driving range.  What time does school get out?”

She was grinning even wider now.  “Two.”

“Yeah, we need to be back by twelve.”

It was her head that gave a tilt of curiosity this time.  “Why is that?”  It was barely 9:30.

Now it was him that was smiling—wide and charming like.  “Never mind that.”   He stepped two feet closer and winked.  “Just get changed and let’s go.”  Then he gave her a swift smack on the ass before waltzing out of the room—smug and cocky-like.

It took her a second to move after he was gone.  She just stood there, still smiling, thinking maybe this was going to be what you might call a date.  She hadn’t been on one of those in ages.

Something about the way Justin handled his club was overly stimulating to Cassidy.  She couldn’t quite figure it out, but she realized she was doing more watching than swinging.  The only thing she could chalk it up to was witnessing the more athletic side of him—something she knew was there, but had rarely seen—and, obviously, she’d always had a thing for athletes.

She’d been playing golf since her early teens and it was evident that there was a bit of a competitive streak in him.  But there was little that could take her attention away from how much she really wanted to jump him—clubs and all.  Over the course of the past minute, she’d checked her watch three times already.  All she really wanted was to take him home.  He’d said something about noon.  At this point, she wasn't sure she could wait that long.

“You, uh, in a hurry?” he asked, mid-stance, about to hit another.

She’d just checked her Cartier for the fourth time in the past sixty seconds.  The smile was impossible to suppress.  “No.  No hurry.”

He took a good whack and the ball sailed across the range.  “Then how come you keep looking at your watch?  We have plenty of time still.”

Looking away, she let out a subtle smirk.  “I don’t want to say.”

He’d just knelt down to place another ball on the tee, but as she’d told him that, he stopped, set down his club and moved closer.  “Why?”

She smirked again, louder.  “Because the walls might have ears,” she said with a bit of a tease.  She wasn’t sure if she really believed it or if she just thought it sounded good.

But instead of looking at her like she was crazy, he gave one quick nod.  “True.   But you sure are making me curious.  Tell me it’s not bad.”

Her smile widened instantaneously.  “It’s definitely not bad.”

It was like he must have read her mind, because next thing she knew they were packing up and heading back to the car.

He was speeding down the freeway and the only image in her head was of her climbing onto his lap and straddling him.  That fantasy quickly turned into a massive car pile-up, which thankfully kept her from attempting to carry it out.  “I don’t think I’ve ever wanted you so badly.”  It was the truth.  And she’d wanted him pretty damn bad before.  This was fucking unbearable.

Justin didn’t respond to her words.  Instead he downshifted and passed the car that had been in front of them, the odometer passing 90 MPH easily.  Most women probably would have told him to slow down at that point.  Not Cassidy.  In her head, she was telling him to speed up.

When they finally pulled inside the security of her gated home, she was out of the car before he put the brake on, rushing up the paved drive, straight to the front door.  He caught her there, by the waist, and turned her around before she’d turned the key in the lock.  Then his lips were on her—warm, moist, soft and inviting.  She felt like putty in his arms.  A mere pile of mush.  She was completely hot from head to toe.

He was grinning widely when he finally gave her a chance to catch her breath, reaching behind her and turning the key that had already been set in the lock.  “God, if you get this worked up just from swinging a few golf balls, I’d love to see what happens when we play an actual game.”  His grin wasn’t just wide anymore, it was cocky.

She liked it.

The front door opened and she stumbled in backwards, pulling him with her as she eagerly untucked his shirt.  She succeeded in pulling the pale yellow polo over his head, only to find the white t-shirt he had on underneath.  She managed a whispered, “damn,” as she clawed at that one as well, but he stopped the movement by grabbing hold of her and hoisting her into his arms.  “We’re not gonna make it upstairs,” she said breathily, wrapping both her legs around his fit frame as he supported all of her weight.

“Not a problem.”  His lips skidded down the side of her neck as he maneuvered them towards the closest room available.  “This’ll work fine,” he said, tossing her down on the neatly made guest bed.

“This is the room my parents stay in when they visit,” she remarked as he came at her, just before his mouth fell to her collarbone.

“All the more intriguing for some reason.”

She smirked, but stopped quickly as his hand slipped underneath the back waist of her khakis.   He kissed her hard—lips and tongue and warm, tantalizing breath—as he managed to undo the button of her pants with his other hand.  They were off in about two seconds flat.  “Your turn,” she breathed, finagling the pesky white cotton over his head, her teeth scraping his bottom lip as he pulled up just long enough to let her discard it.  Her fingers couldn’t seem to cooperate as she tried to unfasten his belt.  He realized her struggle and removed it for her.  Then she was pushing away the flimsy polyester shorts, dying to feel his bare skin—all of it.

When they’d finally managed to rid themselves of all constricting materials, their bodies couldn’t collide fast enough.  It felt like an eternity had passed when her desire was finally met with true satisfaction—him inside of her.

It was needy but slow, quick but drawn-out.  She couldn’t explain it.  She didn’t want to.  She just wanted to feel it—feel every part of it.  Why did this man fill her up in a way that no other ever had?  What made every inch of him feel so amazingly good?  He barely had to touch her and she was half way over the edge.   It was incredible and she didn’t ever want it to end.  She didn’t ever want them to end.

As he collapsed against her, his weight crushing into lungs already starved for breath, she smoothed one hand around his back and the other to the top of his head.  There was something she needed to say.  She’d said it before, not a lot, but it was definitely known.  At the moment she was feeling it more than ever.

“Justin?”

His response came out more as a hum, a perfectly tuned hum.  His chest vibrating against her.  It was pleasing to every ounce of her.  “I love you.”

He kissed her shoulder, the part of her body that involved the least reach on his part.   An evident smile on his face.  “I love you too.”

“Yes.   But I really love you.”

“I really love you too.”

With a smirk, she grabbed both sides of his head and pulled until his sight matched with hers.   “I am head over heels in love with you,” she admitted, speaking softer and quieter than before.

He kissed her cheek and then her lips—tenderly, lovingly.  “It’s nice to hear you admit it,” he said after a moment.  He was teasing her and she knew it.

But she kept her seriousness. “It’s the truth.”

The touch of his palm smoothed over her forehead as he planted a soft kiss to the corner of her mouth.  “Being with you is the most incredible thing I’ve ever felt.   Being with you, and being with my son.”

Cassidy smiled.  “We are a package deal.”

He kissed her again—the other cheek.  “I wouldn’t have it any other way.”   He definitely wasn’t teasing anymore. 

“I love making love with you,” she revealed rather sappily.  It was a rare moment for her to be so emotional, but she was going with it regardless.  She just didn’t feel the need to deny any feelings with him.

Delicately he traced one fingertip down her bare side.  “That is what we do, isn’t it?   Even when it happens so quick most people would categorize it as just a fuck.   But it’s not.  It’s not at all.  Not ever.”

Lightly she shook her head.  “No, not even close.”

With a deep sigh, he had just started to roll off of her when the house phone rang.  “Shit, I left my phone and my wallet in the car.” 

Cassidy didn’t bother to answer her phone, but Justin got dressed and headed out front to grab his from the car.  He sat down in the driver seat and checked his voice mail, realizing he’d missed five calls in a very short period of time. 

Something was going down and he wasn’t sure he wanted to find out what exactly it was.

The first call was from his mom.  The second from Trace. 

There was a pattern going on. 

The third was from his mom again, this time sounding a bit more urgent.

The fourth call was from his publicist and the fifth was from JC—who he hadn’t talked to since before his life had changed so drastically.  Not for any specific reason.  They just hadn’t caught up.  Obviously his long-time friend was calling for just that.  He was sure Chris had relayed the news.  Justin gave him the go-ahead on that.  Besides, it had been all over the papers since then.

He’d call his mom back.  Then Trace.  Then JC.  Then Jeff, his publicist.

Barely stepping out of the car to go back inside of the house, he found Cassidy heading down the drive towards him in her bare feet.  She looked especially appealing to him at that very moment.  Maybe it was the disheveled look about her along with the obvious after-sex glow she held.  Or maybe it was the fact that she’d just showed emotion that had totally made his heart swell even more for her.  Or it could have been how cute she looked in the very flattering denim jeans and t-shirt she’d just slipped on.

“You have a phone call,” she said.  “Two, actually.”

He hadn’t realized till that very second she was carrying the cordless receiver from inside the house.  It must have ringed again after he’d stepped outside.   “My mom?”  He’d bet a million on that one.

She nodded.  “On line one.  Trace on the other.”

Justin shook his head.  “Jesus,” he sighed, taking the phone from her. 

“I heard that,” his mom was saying as he put the device to his ear. 

“Sorry.   What’s up?”

“I called the cell.  Everything okay?”

“Yes…” He sounded it out, hoping she didn’t delve any deeper.  “Everything okay with you?”

“Well, yes, I’m fine.  But, did you hear?”

He was only a stride or two behind Cassidy as she walked inside the front door.  He caught her by the wrist before she could get away any farther.  She turned with a curious stare.  “No,” he told his mom, “but I’m sure whatever it is, that must by why everyone else is calling me too.”

“I heard.  Trace is on the other line?”

“Yeah.   So what is it?”  It was almost like she didn’t want to say.

“Macie was arrested last night.”

That was about the last thing he’d expected to hear.  “What?  Why?”   Cassidy tried to step away, like he wanted his privacy.  But he didn’t, and he let her know it.  He wasn’t letting her go anywhere.

“DUI.   It’s all over the news.”

He was nodding his head—thinking.  This could be a very good thing for him.  Sure, he should be concerned about the well-being of his ex-wife.  Well, maybe not so much after she’d turned into a psycho bitch and decked him in the face a week earlier.   The signs of the incident were still a bit noticeable up close.  What he was thinking more than anything, was that maybe now the focus would be taken off of him just a little bit and put on her.   

Would a little happy dance be inappropriate at the moment?  He thought so, but it was tempting to say the least.

“You’re not saying anything,” his mom spoke after a moment.

“Um, gee…  sucks to be her.”  The other line beeped in his ear and he figured that Trace had hung up and called back.  “Mom, thanks for the heads up but the other line is ringing now and I’m sure it’s Trace calling to tell me the same thing.”

“Okay, call me when things settle down.”

“I will.  Bye.”  Shaking his head with a smirk he relayed the news to Cassidy as he clicked over to the other line.  “’Lo?” was all he managed to get out when he answered, as he’d jumbled too many words in too short of a time.

“J?”   It wasn’t Trace after all.

“JC?   How’d you get this number?”

“Dre.”

“Oh.”

“I’m in the neighborhood.  Mind if I stop by?”

“I’m not home, man.”

“No shit.  I called you, remember?”

Justin shook his head.  “Oh, yeah.  You know how to get here?”

“Yep.   I’ll be there in ten.”

“Cool.   See you then.”

Cassidy was standing there, still looking as hot as hell with sex written all over her, and he realized he just gave the okay for his friend to come to her house without even asking if she cared.  Besides, they only had a couple hours left before Cody got out of school and now their time alone was shot to pieces.

Oh well.  He couldn’t have very well said no to JC.  Not when they hadn’t seen each other in months.  Besides, he and Cassidy would have lots more alone time in the future.  That he was sure of.  In fact, if it was up to him, a babysitter would be ideal very soon.  He'd like to actually take her on a date.  That was something they'd never done and that was just wrong in more ways than one.

“Um…” The phone was still dangling loosely in his right hand.  “JC is coming by.   You haven’t met him yet but he’s one of the guys from the group.”

“Justin, I know who JC is.  I suck at knowing most names of musicians, but let’s say I did do a little bit of homework after we first met, as far as *NSYNC is concerned.”

For some reason that made him smile just a little bit.  “We should make that bedroom look not quite so obvious.  Or at least shut the door or something.”  It was kind of one of the first things to see when you walked inside the house.

Her head tilted curiously.  “Are you afraid he might realize we had sex?”

Now he felt like a goof.  But before he could form a response, the phone was ringing again.   “Did you want to get it?” he asked her.  It was her house.

“Go ahead.  I’m sure it’s for you.”

This time it was Trace.  He let Cassidy go as she rushed towards the room they’d consummated just fifteen minutes earlier.  The call took less than a minute.  It was only seconds later he was chasing after her.  “Hey,” he said, standing just inside the door way as she pulled the duvet off the king sized bed.  She turned expectantly, waiting for him to say more.  “I didn’t mean to sound bossy or anything.  Sorry if I came across that way.”

She shook her head.  “I was planning on straightening up in here anyway.”

Closing the distance between them, he pulled the heavy fabric out of her hands and dropped it.   Then he pulled her into his chest and hugged her slender frame.  “Sorry if I just gave away our alone time.”

Lightly she smirked.  “I already got what I wanted from you.  No big deal.”

His neck arched back, just enough to squint his eyes at her.  “Thanks.  A lot.”

Her grin was big and playful as she kissed him sweetly.  “I’m just kidding.   It’s fine, though.  Don’t worry.  Cody has school tomorrow too.”

Brushing his hand over the side of her head, he urged her closer for another kiss, letting his mouth linger against hers for more than he’d intended.  It was just too hard to pull away. 

“I better finish this up,” she said, once their connection broke.  “I wouldn’t want JC to think we were being naughty before he called.”

But instead of letting her get the best of him, he shot that playfulness right back at her. “I’ll probably end up telling him anyway,” he said, raising his brow animatedly.

She pushed a loud breath of air through her nose and went back to straightening up.   “I figured.”

“Of course you did.”  Lifting her ponytail, he placed one moist kiss to the back of her neck and left the room before she had a chance to turn around.  He wanted to remind her how much they’d both enjoyed each other just a short time before.   Although he doubted it was actually necessary.

© BrandyRae 2006

“She seems cool.”   JC tipped his head back, glancing Cassidy’s direction.  Justin had showed his friend to the kitchen after a brief introduction with his girl.  She must have read his mind, because after a bit of small talk, Cassidy had retreated into the family room, leaving Justin and JC alone to catch up.   Now, apparently, JC had the perfect view of her perched on the sofa in the other room.  Justin couldn’t see a thing, not that he needed to.  Her image was branded forever into his brain.  “What’s she reading?” JC asked quietly, returning his attention to his long-time friend.

Justin shrugged.  Last he’d noticed, it was a biography by Phil Jackson, famed basketball couch of the Chicago Bulls and L.A. Lakers, written some 12 years earlier.  He remembered specifically because of the conversation they’d had about it.  She had a serious dislike for the man, but, Justin learned, it was only after Jackson had left the Bulls.  “Probably sports biography.  You know she used to—”

“Sports media.  Yeah, I remember.  Plus Chris mentioned it.  She gonna go back?”

Once again, he shrugged.   There were so many questions that he had absolutely no answer for.  “That’s totally up to her,” he said.

JC nodded.  “So what do you think about this whole Macie situation?”

“You mean that she’s a stupid bitch and got herself arrested?  I’m hoping it will take some of the focus off me and that maybe I’ll have some freedom to leave the house without being hounded.”

“That’s wishful thinking,” JC remarked.  Unfortunately he was right, but Justin decided that denial was a good place to be in for at least a little while longer.  “She called me this morning.”

Now that was a shocker!   “What the fuck did she call you for?”  Suddenly he felt very much on the defense.  Was he only sitting across from one of his oldest and best friends because his ex-wife had had a part in it?   That was plain bullshit!

JC’s eyes rolled poignantly.  “I don’t know.  I didn’t fucking talk to her.  Do you think I’m stupid?”

That was a relief.  “I started to wonder for a minute,” Justin sighed, letting out the breath he’d subconsciously been holding.

“She’s obviously trying to put a wedge in whatever it is you’ve got going here.”

“What it is—” Is the best thing that’s ever happened to me.  He started to say, but Cassidy waltzed into the room with a big cheesy grin on her lips and the words remained in the hollow of his throat.  “Hi,” Justin grinned, knowing the look he gave off was just as sappy as hers.  She visibly caught JC’s eye as she came around from behind him, making her way toward Justin on the opposite side of the center island.

“Did I disturb serious boy talk?” she asked, raising her brow suggestively.

“Of course not.”   Justin answered, with a mockingly shy grin.

“Hey, when’s the last time you two got out of the house?” JC asked out of the blue.

The couple passed a blank stare between them.  Besides golfing earlier that morning, they’d hardly been anywhere together except for when they’d gone to Tennessee.

“Yeah, that’s what I thought,” JC answered all-knowingly.  “You should come to the club tonight.  We’ll bring you in the back, straight to VIP.  No one will ever know.  You could even come in separately just to be safe.”

Justin stared at Cassidy in waiting.  JC had taken a delve into the nightclub venture, partnering up with a couple other guys, more than six months ago.  Justin still hadn’t checked it out.  According to everyone else, it was a pretty hot spot.  “I’d have to get a sitter for Cody,” she finally said.

“He could stay with Trace and Lisa… I’m sure,” Justin offered up for suggestion.  He realized he was desperate for more time with her as adults—as a couple.  He loved spending time with his son and he loved the family that was growing between the three of them, but he needed something more from their relationship, as well.  “It would be like a,” he paused, grinning hopefully, “date night… sort of.”

Her grin was wide and evident.  She liked the idea.   “I’ll call my mom.  I’m sure they’d love to have him for the night.”

It was just after four when Cassidy dropped off Cody with her mom and dad.  Just as she figured, they were more than thrilled to have him.  He hadn’t spent the night their in quite some time, and he was pretty excited about it, as well.  Her dad was even going to drop him off at school the next morning.  That gave her and Justin a good twenty-two hours of alone time.

Cassidy was practically giddy thinking about it.  She envisioned an evening of drinking, dancing and fun, followed by an all-nighter—sex, sex and more sex.

She was able to force the dreamy gaze off her face when they arrived, meeting her mom at the front door.  It was when she was leaving that her emotion betrayed her.   The look was obviously back.  Either that or her mother had turned psychic—which wasn’t hard to believe either, when it came to Cassidy anyway.  “Hot date?” the woman asked with a suggestive grin, wriggling her eyebrows up and down. 

But for some reason Cassidy felt the need to defend the circumstances.  “We haven’t really been anywhere without—”

“I know, sweetheart,” her mother interrupted.  “I’m glad you two are actually going out on a real date.”

At that Cassidy’s grin grew wide and nonconforming.  Nothing was stopping the giddiness now.  “Yeah, me too,” she agreed whimsically.

The entire hour and fifteen minute drive—it took longer than usual thanks to traffic—Cassidy’s mind was racing with thoughts of her and Justin out and having an amazing time.  She realized it wasn’t just the alone time with him that brought on excitement.  Truth was, she hadn’t actually been out in a social environment, like a nightclub, in so long she could barely remember. 

Unfortunately she did remember it somewhat.  She’d been with Jason, and he’d been secretly flirting with about 5 other women behind her back.

She was positive that was the last type of behavior she could expect from Justin.  He was way too into her to be ogling any of the femme fatale.  Besides, she planned on looking super duper hot.  There was just enough time to stop at m. fredric’s and pick up something sexy yet sheik.

When she returned home—just after 6:00 p.m.—Justin, JC, Trace, Dre and T were all sprawled out in the family room, in front of the TV, playing a video game and making a huge amount of noise.  Instead of interrupting, she managed her way upstairs without ever being noticed and hopped in the shower.

It was nearly seven o’clock when Justin realized that it had been quite some time since Cassidy had left the house to drop off Cody.  “You guys should go,” he said, as he put down his Xbox 360 controller and reached for his cell phone. 

They all stood, stretching after the amount of time they’d all been stationed in one position.  “We’ll be back at ten to pick you up,” JC remarked.

Justin nodded, Cassidy’s number the first in his call log and letting it automatically dial.  “You guys can see your way out?”

They agreed and were quickly gone as Justin waited for her to pick up.  Just as her voice mail came on, Dre was shouting from the front door.  “Hey J, her car’s here.”

His head tilted with curiosity even though no one was watching him.  “K, thanks!” he shouted in reply.  Then he scratched his head, figuring she must be upstairs.  The front door slammed shut making it known that his friends were out.

“Damn woman, why the hell didn’t she tell me she was home?” he questioned quietly to himself as he made way up the curvy flight of stairs.  He was so involved in hanging out with the guys—something he hadn’t done in awhile—he hadn’t even heard her come in.  God, what an idiot he was.  Now all he could think about was how excited he was to have her all to himself for a whole night.

Entering the oversized master suite, he found her peacefully asleep on her partially unmade bed.  A pang of contentment mixed with brazen dire hit him straight in the chest.  His breathing stopped for just a brief second as he took in the sight of her—all of her.  Her red-polished toes, always perfectly manicured.  Her long, lean legs, shimmering with the glitzy moisturizer she used.  The tiny pair of shorts she wore—the type she wore around the house so often—that didn’t hide much of her amazing figure, as they sat both low and loose on her hips.  The tank that covered the top of her didn’t hide much either, a patch of taught, tan tummy not missing his eye.  Unthinkingly he let out a deep breath of air as his gaze sloped up her chest, finding her arms sprawled out on either side of her.  Beneath her head and covering the pillow, her dark chestnut locks formed waves of silk, dampened and full of sheen.  Her breathing was slow and rhythmic, completely relaxed.

Part of him wanted to pounce on her.  The other part of him decided it would be better to wake her more slowly—seductively.

Carefully he climbed up beside her and started from the bottom, delicately placing a kiss to the top of her foot.   She smelled incredible—vanilla and brown sugar.  He wanted to just eat her right up.  Damn those cosmetic companies for making lotions smell so good you could almost taste them.

When she didn’t stir from the first kiss, he worked on the second.  This one just on the inside of her ankle.  Then he decided that the inside of her leg was a good place to continue, both sensitive and soft.  He’d made it one kiss above her knee when the “mmmm” sound from her throat made it known that she was awake.  His eyes roamed up the length of her, locking with hers as she tilted up enough to get a look at him.  He smiled wide and proud before returning his mouth to her flesh.  Only this time he felt playful enough to involve his teeth—although, more gently than rough.

“You don’t want to wait till later?” she asked.  “After you’re all hot and bothered from grinding on the dance floor?”

He bit down on his bottom lip, stewing over the idea.  Deciding his answer was no, he shook his head and returned to his work area—smoothing his tongue all the way up her inner thigh.  She hummed again and sat up, retracting away from him.

Feigning a look of displeasure, he moved toward her.  Just a breath away from her lips, he let her intoxicating scent overwhelm him.  Then he kissed her quietly and seductively, keeping his mouth against her when he finally spoke.  “First I wanna make you come really hard,” he revealed softly.  “Then we’ll have dinner.  Then I plan on dancing with you until our feet hurt so bad neither of us can stand up any longer.”

Her hands gripped the back of his head as her mouth pummeled into his, her tongue the driving force behind it.  It was like she just couldn’t have him enough, and he knew exactly how that felt.  As he reached for her flimsy shirt, his hand finding it's way underneath and seeking out her bare flesh, she breathed heavily as she spoke.  “Why are you so amazingly hot?”

The praise she bestowed on him felt better than any he’d ever received and he knew it was because she didn’t readily just give it out.  “Why are you so incredibly sexy?” he asked in return.

“Because you make me feel sexy,” she answered, swooping a hand underneath his shirt and up his abdomen.

“God, I am so fucking in love with you.”  He was and he had no problems admitting it.

Her beaming smile only added to the feeling as she tore his t-shirt over his head.  “I don’t think sex would ever get old with you,” she mused.

“I don’t think anything would ever get old with you,” he responded, tenderly nibbling on the place where her shoulder smoothed into her neck.  “You have the sweetest tasting skin,” he voiced.

A quiet chuckle rumbled in her chest.  “I think I’m really enjoying all this alone-time we’ve had today,” she told him just before her words turned into a whimper, his lips moving up towards her hairline.

“Me too.”  It came out as more of a groan than anything, probably because of the huge ache he was feeling for her at the moment.  He was convinced that this woman could make him hard any time, any place.  He could be at the fucking dentist’s office and take one look at Cassidy and be hard as a fucking rock.   She made him crazy with desire.  More so than anyone ever had.

It was as if she’d read his mind just then, her hand smoothing over his crotch.  “And you have the most beautiful dick I’ve ever seen.”  He realized then that she had him completely exposed.  He also realized that she was the only woman that had ever spoken to him in such a bold manner—and he liked it.

“But of course you haven’t seen that many,” he heard himself saying, wishing already he could take it back.  Wrong conversation.   Definitely at the wrong time.

“There have been a few,” she said.  “You know that, I’m sure.”  Her hands met his cheeks as she directed his eyesight towards hers.  Then she kissed him again, harder than the time before.

He was supposed to be seducing her.  Why did he feel like the situation had completely gotten away from him all the sudden?

And just like clockwork, it was at that moment the home phone started ringing.  Pulling back, Cassidy said, “I’d ignore it, but with Cody gone it could be important.”

Justin nodded in agreement and re-adjusted his shorts as Cassidy hopped off the bed and grabbed the cordless that was sitting on her vanity across the room.  “Hello?” she answered it.  Justin watched as her complexion went from its normal creaminess to ghastly white in two seconds flat.   She pulled the phone away from her ear and stuck her arm out towards him.  Then she was whispering, “What the fuck, Justin?  What the fuck?”

“What?  Who is it?” He asked, as he strode towards her.  Cassidy didn’t answer.  She just shoved the thing at his chest.  He put it to his ear, completely put off by the whole situation.  He had no idea who could’ve upset her to such an extent.   “Hello?” The voice on the other end was sobbing uncontrollably, but was still, unfortunately, incredibly recognizable—to anyone who had ever seen one of her movies anyway, which was pretty much 90 percent of the movie-going population.  What the fuck was right!  “No,” he told Macie forcefully, as she whined about her life being over and her career being ruined.  Thing was, he didn’t give a damn if his ex-wife was having an emotional breakdown or what-the-fuck-ever else.  “Do not ever call here again.  What the fuck is wrong with you?”

She started to answer, but he wasn’t about to listen.  He hung up the phone. 

He shrugged unknowingly as his eyes met with Cassidy’s.  “I don’t know,” he said, because he was sure she was about to ask at least a handful of questions that he didn’t have answers for.

“How did she get my number?  How does she even know who I am or that you’re here?  If she knows, that means other people know too.”

Justin nodded.  “I’m sorry.  I’m really sorry.”

It was obvious that Cassidy was having a difficult time controlling her anger.  She turned sharp on her heels, away from him, her hands tangling in her hair.   Then she dropped her arms and turned back towards him.  “God Dammit,” she huffed.  “You do not know how hard it was not to cuss her out.  Fuck!”  Turning away again, she marched towards the white upholstered vanity chair that was already pulled halfway from the counter and plopped down.  When her dark brown eyes focused on him again they were filled with a mix of anger and frustration.   “I want to be mad at you,” she told him.  “I really want to be mad at you.”

And if it were Jason standing in front of her, she would be.  She’d be temper-tantrum mad if Justin were her ex-husband.  But he wasn’t and she couldn’t.  Every single bone in her body told her that Justin honestly had no idea why his ex-wife had just called her house, crying for him. 

God, how pathetic!

“But?” he asked, slow and cautious-like. 

Cassidy didn’t want him to be wary of her temper, but she felt like he was.  Like he was trying not to set her off.  Was that the way he saw her—a bomb about to explode at any given moment, given the right combination of circumstances?  She really needed to get her anger in check.  She hated feeling this way.  “I’m not mad at you,” she finally said.  “I’m just mad.”

He came to her then, kneeling down in front of her and looking up with puppy-dog blue eyes.  “Please don’t let this ruin your night,” he said.

She shook her head.  “It won’t.  Just give me a minute.”

He nodded, still gazing up at her as he rested both arms on her knees.

“I know I have a tendency to get really angry really fast and I’m sorry.  I’m trying to work on that.”

A tiny grin teased his lips.   “You do,” he agreed.  “But I forgive you.”

Letting her neck tilt forward, she rested her cheek against his head.  His short, dark-blond hair felt soft and fuzzy against her skin.  His hands found her hips as he hugged onto her.  “Why, Justin?” she asked softly.  “Why on Earth is she calling you?  Now?”

“I have no fucking idea, but I don’t like it anymore than you do.”  He answered in a soft and tender tone and in her heart she felt his absolute sincerity.  That was all that mattered to her at that moment.

“If you want to really stir things up, Cassidy can go in with me,” JC suggested as they pulled up to the back of his nightclub, simply named Out.  Even at the back entrance there were paparazzi staked out.  True, their distance was farther then if passing through the street entrance, but the camera-hounds were there nevertheless.  And with the high-tech lenses out nowadays distance didn’t matter much.  They were unavoidable.

“Works for me,” Cassidy said.  Truth was, she didn’t really want to walk in alone.  She wanted to walk in with Justin.  She wanted to be proud to be seen with him, but the longer they could put off the news, the better.  For Cody’s sake.  And that’s what Justin seemed to want.

“That’s fine,” Justin remarked, but he didn’t exactly seem thrilled with the idea. 

Honestly, they were all getting out of the same vehicle, so what difference did it make?

But just as Dre started to open the door, Justin grabbed Cassidy’s wrist.  “Wait.  Fuck that,” he spoke up, rather adamantly.  “You’re walking in with me.”  She looked back at him, semi-smirk across her face.  His expression was stone-cold serious.  She’d be lying if she said that his need to take charge all the sudden didn’t turn her on just a little bit.  “Macie fuckin’ knows.  Everyone’s gonna fucking know tomorrow anyway.”

Cassidy didn’t have a problem with that.  Justin scooted in front of her, took her hand and stepped out.  She followed, JC behind her and security all around, as she braced herself for the flash of photography that would come from just a short distance away.  It was over before she even realized if it had happened.

The hallway they stepped into was completely empty.  The walls were painted flat black, making it not only empty, but dark.  JC took the lead and showed them to the private VIP room.  Loud music thumped and based, one of the local DJ’s the cause of it, no doubt.

There were maybe a dozen people situated in the upstairs area, all high-profile guests.  Half of them easily recognizable.  Red and black couches and chairs were placed in a sleek and modern fashion, with mirrors and twinkling lights as accents.  Small, flickering white candles were placed strategically in the center of the tables.  Along the back wall was a long narrow bar, high-glossed in a black finish with simple black stools along the front of it.  Behind the counter were two very attractive bartenders—one man and one woman.  “Whatever you guys want’s on me,” JC announced.  “I’ve gotta make a quick stop in the office and then I’ll be back.”

Justin nodded as he and Cassidy sat side by side at a small corner table.  “What do you want?” he asked her.  “Trace and Lisa should be here any minute.”  She was glad more people were meeting them.  The bigger the crowd, the better.  Although she wasn’t sure why she felt that way.

They hadn’t even ordered their drinks when a few guys from across the room came and joined them.  Cassidy had seen a couple of their faces, but she didn’t know names until Justin introduced them.  Soon their table was full and when Trace and Lisa arrived, they took over the next table and it filled too.

An hour into their night, the couple decided to let off a little steam on the small, private dance floor.  A two-way mirror overlooked the rest of the club, a jam-packed dance floor directly below.  Bodies swayed and grinded to the beat—a club remix of classic Michael, “Don’t Stop Till You Get Enough”.  Down below a giant wave of body parts and sweat.  It was quite an interesting view.

When the couple decided it was time to take a break, they both noticed JC, Trace and T standing towards the door, trying to be discreet, but not accomplishing the attempt in the slightest.  Justin turned to Cassidy with an inquisitive look and took her hand, leading her that direction.  “What’s going on?” he asked them.

All three men’s faces went instantly blank.  Trace tipped the dark, iced beverage he was gripping and nearly spilled on T.  “Shit.  Sorry,” he said.  Shaking his head, T took a step back. JC was the one that came forward.  “Macie’s in the other room.”  Then he looked at Cassidy.  “With your ex-husband.”

Without thinking, she dropped Justin’s hand.  She was completely flabbergasted.  “Well,” she said with disgust, focusing her attention on Justin.  “That explains a lot.  Doesn’t it?”

He just shook his head.   “You wanna go?”  Then he looked at JC.  “Are you keeping them over there?  Do they know we’re here?”

JC shook his head no.  “They have no idea you’re here and, yes, security has been instructed to keep them in the other lounge.  But… well, the bathroom is sort of a common area for both rooms.  You could run into one of them there.”

“I’ll hold it all fuckin’ night if I have to,” Cassidy blurted without thinking.  “No wait, if I punched her in the face, would I be escorted out?”

“Babe…” Justin was calling her softly.  But it brought her no comfort and the fact that Trace and T were trying not to laugh at her remark only egged her on. 

“As much joy as that might bring all of us,” JC remarked.  “I can tell you from a media perspective that is the last thing you want to do, which I’m sure you know given your background.”  No one ever brought that up and it was a nice reminder of the career she almost had.  That being said, of course she knew decking Justin’s ex-wife was a bad idea, but it didn’t change how badly she wanted to.

Shaking her head, she let out a deep gush of air.  “I need another drink.”

“I’ll get that,” JC said and stepped away.  

“You guys go sit down,” T instructed.  “Don’t worry about anything.  I’ve got it taken care of.”

Justin nodded and led them back to their table.  When they sat down, their bodies were close and even though there were others all around them, he made it feel like it was only the two of them.  Bringing his face in close to hers, he brought a hand to her cheek.  “It’s obvious they’re doing this to try and get a reaction out of us,” he spoke at a low level, his breath warm against her ear.  It brought on a new kind of warmness, one that didn’t have anything to do with her frustration, the alcohol, or the temperature inside the room.

“I know.”  She inched even closer, her nose side-by-side with his.  “I don’t really care.”

“Good.”  He brushed his lips over hers just once—moist and warm.   His grip fell to her thigh as he brought her knees in towards him and slipped his hand towards her denim-clad behind.  “You are so fine.  You know that?"

She was smiling when he kissed her again.  She hadn’t forgot what had just happened, but it was nice that he could distract her from it so easily.  “I love you,” she told him, her lips moving against his as she barely vocalized the words.  

“I love that you love me,” he said.  Feeling his grin, she wasn’t expecting that response, but she liked it nevertheless.  And before she could think of anything else, his tongue was practically down her throat as their kiss turned deep and somewhat passionate, his hand slipping in between her thighs.  Thank God she was wearing jeans, because anything thinner and the feeling would be way too much!  She was already hot from head to toe for him!

It donned on her, somewhere in the back of her mind, that she’d never been big on PDA’s before.  With Justin, her whole outlook was different.  She didn’t give a damn who was watching or what they might be saying.  By tomorrow, the whole L.A. club scene would know about their relationship.  Give it a day after that, and the rest of the country would know too.  Macie and Jason would make sure of that.  But Cassidy didn’t give a damn at the moment.  As long as Justin’s body stayed close to hers, she felt just fine.

© BrandyRae 2006

The following morning Cassidy sat across from Justin at the kitchen table.  Him with a giant bowl of Cocoa Puffs and her with a cup of coffee and a piece of wheat toast.  His cell phone was glued to his ear and had been for a good five minutes.  His cereal was on the cusp of sogginess. 

“I know.  I know.  But I am tired of hiding out.  Is there really such a thing as bad press anyway?”  He was talking to his publicist, who apparently wasn’t all that thrilled with their excursion out the night before.  Especially since—and Cassidy had just found this out—Justin was scheduled to start promotions for a movie he’d filmed almost two years earlier that was soon-to-be released.  “Look, I have confidence that you can spin this to make me look good and her like shit.”  Of course there was no question that the “her” he was referring to was Macie.   No explanation needed there.  “No, I seriously doubt they’re actually dating.  They’re just in cahoots together to get back at us.”

Cassidy couldn’t help it.  A tiny smirk escaped her at the sound of him using the word “cahoots.”  Justin looked up, eyeing her goofily.  Then he shook his head and rolled his eyes in obvious regard to the phone call. 

“Hey Jeff, my breakfast is getting cold.  Just handle it and call me when you find out the headlines.  Yeah, bye.”  Slapping his phone shut, Justin pushed a breath of air out his nose, wrinkling it for affect.

“Um, your breakfast started cold,” Cassidy pointed out before biting into her slice of eleven grain.

“Yeah, well I had to come up with something,” he said, finally spooning a bite.

“Cahoots?  I liked that one,” she told him with a playful grin, switching the toast for the coffee.

“I aim to please, baby.   I aim to please.”  He looked up from his cereal just long enough to give her a wink.  How on Earth was it possible he could make her tummy tumble this early in the morning?  Well, it wasn’t exactly early.  It was after ten, but considering they didn’t make it home till almost three the night before, it felt real damn early.  Plus, they’d only been up for about 30 minutes.

“How come you didn’t tell me that you had a movie release coming up so soon?”

Tilting his chin, spoon dangling in his fingers, he shrugged his shoulders just once.  “I guess,” he paused and looked away briefly, “for the first in my life I’m actually enjoying my down time.  I was trying to forget about work.”

Cassidy could understand that—sort of.  In actuality, she felt like her career had been too off-and-on to grow tired of it.  “Well, I feel a little bad.  Maybe we should have stayed in last night.”

“Please…” He drew it out.  “No.”

Slowly she took a sip of her steaming black coffee, peering at him over the ridge of the dark green mug. 

“Aside from all the drama with our exes, I had a really good time last night.”  There was this smug, confident grin across his face as he scooped another heaping bite into his mouth.  Suddenly Cassidy was having visions of their mornings together for years to come.  There was only one thing missing from the picture. 

“Me too,” she thought to agree.

“So what time does Cody get out of school, again?  I miss him.”

An instant smile popped to her lips as she was sure he’d just read her mind.  “Me too,” she said for a second time.  “He gets out at two.”

“I’m picking him up today,” Justin announced.  “Well, if that’s okay with you, I mean.”

“Why not,” she remarked, just before biting into her toast.  “It’s not like we can keep it a secret any longer.”

“We weren’t trying to keep it a secret,” Justin corrected.  “We were just trying to keep him protected from the media.”

Cassidy nodded her head.   “I didn’t mean to make it sound like we were keeping us a secret.”

“The whole world can know as far as I’m concerned,” Justin added, confidence oozing from every pore of his six foot frame, and then some.

“Well, I’m sure that our exes are working on that as we speak,” Cassidy remarked with cynicism. 

He shook his head.  It was such an irritating situation, it was actually comical.   Just the fact that Jason and Macie had actually gotten together to wallow or vent or whatever the hell it was they were doing, was quite astonishing.  Especially since they were the last two people you’d ever think could come together for anything.  Cassidy didn’t even think they knew each other.  “So how do you think it happened?  Do you think he called her up and was like, ‘You don’t know me but my bitch ex-wife is fucking your bastard ex-husband?’”

“Honestly?  I could really give a shit.”

“Good answer.  Let’s not mention it for the rest of the day.”

Sounded like a plan to her.   “I loved your use of descriptive words, by the way,” she grinned coyly.  He flashed her one quick and confident Timberlake grin before officially ending the conversation, Cassidy heading upstairs for a shower.

Justin ate his cereal in a hurry once he finished with the array of phone calls necessary thanks to the prior evenings events.  His main goal was to catch Cassidy in the shower before it was too late.  As anxious as he was to see Cody, he wanted to enjoy the last little bit of alone time he had with her. 

The night before had been fun but hectic, with all the drama caused by his ex wife and Cassidy’s ex husband.   They’d tried their hardest to let loose, but neither of them ended up drinking much and although Cassidy hadn’t said as much, she’d constantly been looking over her shoulder.  Justin knew because he’d been doing the same thing.

A confrontation would have been the worst thing for “date night.”  No doubt.

By the time they’d got home the night before, they were both wiped out and had ended up falling fast asleep.   Sex hadn’t even been a thought for either of them.  That had been a first.  Not that he was worried.  And not that he expected their awesome sex streak to last forever, because they were human after all.  He just hoped everything happening wasn’t too much for her.  He hoped she wasn’t changing her mind about their relationship.

Upstairs, instead of finding her in the shower, he learned instead that she’d crawled back in bed and was flipping through the late morning talk shows.  “Everything okay?” he found himself asking.

Her stare gravitated towards him.  Her brown tresses scattered all over the place.  There was just a tad bit of make-up left on her eyes from the night before, even though he distinctly remembered her washing her face and brushing her teeth before coming to bed.

She was kind of a mess, and still he found her utterly attractive.  The definitive sign of true love.  He found her completely captivating in such a natural state.  A massive swell of emotion buzzed in his chest and next thing he knew he was plopping down right beside her.

“I’m still tired,” she answered, as he propped his pillow next to her shoulder and huddled in close, throwing a leg over both of hers.  She grinned, smirked and eyed him next to her.  “Today sounds like a perfect day to do absolutely nothing.”

“I like that idea,” Justin agreed, delicately trailing the tips of his fingers down her arm.  “We can send T out for some movies and just lay around all day.”

“That sounds perfect.   T can even pick of Cody if you want,” she said, still eyeing him from the side.

“Nah.  If I don’t do anything else today, I’m still gonna do that.”

Five days later it was everywhere.  It.  As in them.  Pictures at the driving range.  At Out.   In the car, pulling out of Cassidy’s driveway.  In the car, pulling into Cody’s preschool.  The paparazzi were everywhere and there was absolutely no escaping it.  Hiding out at Cassidy’s house was pointless because the mob was just as bad there as it was at Justin’s house.  Didn’t these people ever need a break?

Some of the headlines were just plain funny, but most were simply stupid.  The mother of Justin’s illegitimate child finally revealed!, WIFE-SWAPPING! Justin Timberlake and Jason Brown! (Cassidy found that one especially amusing), Justin settling in… are marriage plans next?   The list went on and on.  And the stories to back up the headlines were just as amusing and only about 15 percent accurate.  She especially loved the one about the four of them showing up at the nightclub and having a major blowout in the middle of the dance floor.  The truth was, they’d never seen a hint of each other, although Justin and Cassidy had definitely been aware of the others presence.

A good conflict was always good for the club it had happened in, though.  So at least JC’s business was reaping from all the publicity.  Not that the spot had needed any help in that department to begin with.

There did seem to be one thing the media masses were reporting correctly.  The fact that she and Justin were gaga over each other had been published in just about every story, coming from several different “sources”—so to speak.   In actuality, Cassidy was positive that Justin had made sure his fondness for her was spread generously amongst the entertainment media.  And she had a good feeling it was probably irritating the hell out of the ex Mrs. Timberlake.

In less than a week’s time, Macie and Jason had been pictured everywhere.  Mostly in very obvious places to be photographed.  Places known to be a major draw.  Restaurants where celebrities go specifically just for publicity.  Bad or good, it didn't matter.  If you’re trying to be discreet, you certainly don’t have lunch on the patio at The Ivy. 

It was obvious the two exes were trying to pull something.  Neither Cassidy nor Justin cared to know exactly what that something was.  In fact, they were trying to ignore it all together.  But having a so-called normal relationship was rather difficult when you were living right smack in the middle of a full-out media blitz. 

And not surprisingly, they were both getting a little edgy.

All Cassidy wanted to do was go to the grocery store, but it was nearly impossible to get out of the driveway.  She’d never felt so stir crazy in her entire life and her nerves were definitely wearing thin.

“Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.”   She cursed softly as she stormed back into the house, slamming the front door behind her.  She needed a change of scenery—bad.  “This is so fucking ridiculous.”  She was whispering, mumbling to herself, trying to let off some steam without her words making way to her son, who was in the kitchen with Justin, Dre and Matt, Justin’s newly-hired assistant.  He needed one with all that was going on.  It was impossible to get anything done for himself.

They’d told her not to try and leave.  Matt was going to go.  That was his job.   But they didn’t understand.   Cassidy was used to doing these things for herself and she desperately needed some normalcy.  She needed something familiar.  Staying in the house all day was not normal.  Yes, it was definitely familiar.  It was too familiar.  That was the problem.  She felt like a damn recluse.

And it pissed her off to no end that they’d been right.  She’d realized it as the gate was half way open, hitting the remote button to shut it before it was too late and pulling back up the drive.  She’d marched back up to the house with the ugliest scowl across her face imaginable.    That’s how it felt, at least.

Taking in two deep breaths, she stormed into the kitchen.  All eyes focusing on her except for Cody’s.  He was deeply involved in a new coloring book—thank God.  “Justin,” she gasped, the wariness of her mind seeping through in the tone of her voice.  “I need to get out of here.”

As if on cue, Matt stole Cody’s attention away from the coloring book and they left the room.  Cassidy liked having the young guy around.  He wasn’t just good for running errands.  He was good for distracting her son, as well.  She realized at this point they needed all the help they could get.  The thought of a nanny had surfaced a few times already.  Not that Cody was too much to handle.  Cassidy had raised him without much help for most of his four years.  There had been times when she’d hired someone, but the majority of the time it had been just her.  And she liked it that way.  But her life was a bit overwhelming at the moment and the last thing she wanted to do was take her frustrations out on her little boy.

“I have the movie junket all day tomorrow.  We can go check into the hotel.  You guys can hide out with me there.”

That would have to do.   It was better than staring at the same goddamn walls in her living room for one minute longer.

Justin had never seen a woman pack so fast.  Ever.   And she hadn’t just packed herself, she’d packed Cody too.  Granted, they were only going to be gone a night or two, but still.  She was done in twenty minutes flat.  He’d sat at the end of the bed, watching the entire process with complete fascination.

She zipped a classic Louis Vuitton Keepall and looked up him expectantly.  “I’m ready.”

Glancing at the Rolex on his wrist, he tilted his head and then looked back at her.  “The room won’t be ready for another hour.”  Matt had only got off the phone with the hotel five minutes earlier.

“By the time we get past the circus outside it’ll have been an hour,” Cassidy reasoned.

She was right.  Justin hopped up and headed into the closet to throw some stuff into a bag for himself.

By the time they were all crammed inside the blacked-out security SUV another half an hour had passed.  Dre and T were up front.  Matt and Cody were in the middle seat and Justin and Cassidy were in the very back.  It was the most uncomfortable seat in the car, but neither of them wanted Cody back there if it wasn’t necessary.  Besides, the farther back they were, the harder for the paparazzi to get a glimpse—or a photo.

“Cody?  Did Daddy tell you that Grandma Lynn is meeting us for dinner later?” Cassidy leaned forward and ruffled the top of her son’s curly head.   The boy turned to look back the best that he could, around his booster seat.

“Nu uh,” he answered.  “I like Grandma Lynn,” he stated matter-of-factly.  “Is Grandpa Paul coming too?”

“Not this time, bud,” Justin answered.  “Just Grandma Lynn.”

“That’s okay.   We can send a plate for him,” the little boy suggested with complete sentiment.  Justin caught the peep of a giggle slip from Cassidy’s voice, just before she covered her mouth.  She shook her head, smiling wide.  The twinkle had returned to her eyes.  It was something he’d rarely seen since their world had turned completely crazy.  Next thing he knew, he was taking her hand and gently kissing the corner of her lips.  She turned into him, the intoxicating warmth of her palm finding his denim-clad thigh.  Unfortunately, the action was brief as a heavy groan sounded from the driver’s seat and shook them back to reality.

Justin gazed out the windshield as Dre maneuvered past the cars that lined the drive.  A new thought entered Justin’s mind.  It was one thing to have a gate around your property, but maybe it was time to secure themselves even further.  Maybe into a gated community.  Things couldn’t possibly be this bad—at least not directly outside your front door, so to speak.

Grasping Cassidy’s hand, he squeezed it tight and leaned in close to whisper.  “After I finish promoting this movie, let’s move.”

Her brow furrowed in the center of her otherwise smooth forehead.  “Move?”

“Yeah, to a more secure neighborhood,” he explained.

With a smirk, she asked, “Is there such a thing?”

Justin nodded.  “Gated.” 

Cassidy didn’t have any problems moving.  Sure, she loved her home and had made sure it was one thing she won from the divorce.  But still, it was just a house.  A thing.   Something she could easily detach herself from.   That wasn’t what had surprised her by his suggestion and she realized that Justin probably didn’t even realize what he’d just suggested.  Yes, they’d been living together—sort of.  Meaning, they’d slept in the same bed every night since the first night they’d got together.  But other than clothing and personal items, no one had actually moved any of their belongings.  He still had his own house.  She obviously had hers.  Both of them had their own places.  They didn’t “technically” live together.  So when he suggested that they move, he was also suggesting that they move in together.  At least that’s the impression she got.

Raising an eye, she peered at him curiously.  “Would you sell the house you’re in now?”

His expression went flat as he shrugged his shoulders and tilted his head.  “I don’t know.  I could.  Or I could just add to the list of properties I already own.”

Cassidy wondered exactly what that list entailed, but not enough to ask and it definitely wasn't the issue at hand.   The more important question was, “Would I have to sell mine?”

He shrugged again, his eyes round with openness.  “That would be up to you, of course.”

Still, he hadn’t acknowledged the fact that he was suggesting they move in together.  Did he even realize what he’d just asked?  Obviously not.

She let it drop.  And so did he.

By the time they arrived at the hotel Cody was in dire need of a restroom.  They pulled around to side of the building where there was an entrance for high-profile guests who preferred more private accomadations.  It was a driveway that went underground and led to an enclosed parking garage.   Cassidy helped Cody out of his seat as quickly as possible, the two of them rushing towards the elevator, which was only a few feet away.

After pushing the button, she turned her back to the shiny metallic doors and leaned down, urging Cody to hang in there just another second.  As soon as she heard the bell, she turned quickly and was met face to face with JC.  An unexpected encounter, for sure.

With an odd look, she pointed back to where she’d come from and said “Justin’s that way” before ushering Cody into the elevator and quickly pushing the button for the doors to close, flashing him a quick smile.  The last thing she wanted was for her little boy to have an accident on their way inside this five star hotel.

When they came out of the restroom a short time later, the small entourage was standing just outside, waiting.  “Feel better, bud?” Justin asked, looking down at Cody.   The boy nodded his head expressively.  “Good,” the bigger Timberlake smiled.

It was then Cassidy managed to take in JC’s appearance.  He looked somewhat disheveled in a worn pair of jeans and slightly wrinkled t-shirt, his short hair hidden underneath a dark baseball hat but still screaming unkempt underneath.   Maybe it was the lack of product or the way it had bed-head written all over it.  Regardless, she was picking up on the fact that his being there was a complete coincidence.  What exactly was he doing at a hotel at three o’clock in the afternoon anyway?  A mid-day booty-call perhaps?  She wasn’t sure why the thought brought on the urge to giggle, but she suppressed it nevertheless.   JC was the consummate bachelor.  It was one of those things you just know.  And she respected the fact that he didn’t try to pretend to be something that he wasn’t.  He put it all up front.  She watched him firsthand with a few different women the night they’d hung out at his club.  He made it very known that he was not looking for a relationship.  Of course there was a small part of her that wondered what had made him so hard-skinned, but she was just barely getting to know Justin’s friends.  It wasn’t something she couldn’t ask now.  Maybe something she wouldn't be able to ask ever. 

“Yeah, come back by later.  We’ll just be hanging out.  My mom’s meeting us for dinner.  She’d love to see you.”  That was the end of the conversation between Justin and JC. 

“Nice seeing you again, Cassie.”  JC grinned, flashed a wave and was on his way.  She had a feeling she wouldn’t be using her full name much anymore, thanks to Justin.  She figured Cassie was a nice change for this new page in her life anyway.  Bye, bye Cassidy.  Hello Cassie.   Whether she asked for it or not.

Justin looped his fingers with hers and used his other hand to ruffle Cody’s curly-topped head.  “Come on.  Let’s go find our room,” he said.

© BrandyRae 2006

It was a quarter to six when his mom arrived.  By five-till he’d managed to pull her aside and practically beg her to spend some quality “grandma time” with her grandson—pizza, the video arcade, shopping.  He didn’t care.  All he knew was it had been almost a week since he’d spent any time alone with Cassidy.   Ever since the news had hit the papers their lives had been insane.  Someone was always at the house—security, Trace, Matt.  Plus, Cody hadn’t been sleeping too great, which meant even the nights were hectic.  Justin was afraid the stress was affecting their son, even though they were trying to shield him from it as much as possible.

Luckily, just as he imagined, his mom was happy to spoil her grandson a little.  She was going to take him out to eat.  She promised to be gone for at least an hour and she would take T with her, for obvious reasons.  Justin managed to kick everyone else out of the room before Cody was even ready to go.  As soon as he and Cassidy had kissed their little boy goodbye, the room was completely empty.

Cassidy strutted towards him with an obvious know-it-all expression.  “Gee, that wasn’t obvious or anything.”

“We haven’t had sex in three days.”  For some reason he was whining.  He needed to stop that immediately.

With a smirk, she half-smiled.  “Don’t remind me.”

Justin figured they both definitely needed to let off some steam.  What better way than getting naked with each other?  He wasn’t wasting any time.  Stepping towards her, he tore his shirt over his head.  Her eyes focused on him as she stood there frozen in front of the couch in the living room of their suite.  When he got to her, he nearly tackled her, planting her down on the cushion and jumping on top of her.

“Ouch,” she managed calmly.

He chuckled.  “Sorry.  Was that too rough?   I’m a little anxious.”

“I can tell.”   Her brown eyes studied him, her pouty lips looking oh-so tempting.  He wanted to just gobble her up.

“Is it bad that I want you all day, all the time?”

“Well,” she mused, “I’d say it’s more like a little surprising that you could feel so strongly and still we haven’t found the time to actually be together over the past few days.  Are you sure you want me all the time, everyday?”  She was toying with him and he wasn’t sure if he had the patience for that.

“Fuck.  Are you crazy?  Yes.”

Those naughty lips of hers widened into a devilish grin, but not one word fell from her mouth.

“We have an hour, maybe an hour and a half tops.”

“So you’re telling me we need to hurry?”

“I’m telling you that if we don’t take advantage of this time alone that I am probably going to explode.”

At that she outright laughed.   “I love you,” she said.  “Our life is crazy right now, but I don’t care.  I’m so in love with you.”

Damn it.  She had to go and get sentimental on him.  Nestling his face beside hers, he took in a deep whiff of her and lightly kissed the tender spot below her ear.  “I love you too,” he said softly.  “After this, let’s try and get away for a few days.  Just me and you.  Can we?”

Her palm smoothed to the back of his neck and instinctively his lips made way to hers.  “Definitely.”

He hummed as he finally kissed her.  He’d started it as just a need, but she’d turned it into what it truly was—undeniable love and adoration.  Damn, he was such a goner when it came to her.

They’d been given an hour, but they’d been so desperate for it that they’d finished with time to spare.  In not much more than underwear, they both laid on the sofa, curled up together, just enjoying the peace and quiet.  Not one thing was on.  No TV.  No radio.  The only sound to be heard was that of each other’s breath.  It was something they both needed very much.

Of course they both knew it wouldn’t last forever, and rightfully so, as a knock on the door broke the silence of the moment.  “Shit,” Justin sighed.  “I forgot that JC was coming back.”

Cassidy chuckled.  “Why does he always catch us right after sex?”

“Because we do it a lot?” Justin smirked.  He kissed her one more time on the cheek and hopped up, pulling his pants on while walking towards the door.  Cassidy grabbed what clothing was on the floor and fled to the bathroom.

Justin had barely managed to pull his t-shirt over his head by the time he opened the door.

“You could have told me you were busy,” JC announced quietly, cautiously looking past Justin into the suite as he obviously realized they’d been up to something.

“We’re done.” Justin shook his head and let the man inside.  “We haven’t had much time to ourselves lately with all that’s been going on.”

“You don’t have to explain to me,” JC remarked.  “You know that.  Where’s your mom and Cody?”  He didn’t ask where Cassidy was, but it must have been obvious that she was there somewhere.

“They should be back any minute.  Did you eat yet?”

JC shook his head no.

“Room service?”

JC shrugged.  “Fine with me.”

Cassidy stepped out of the bathroom then, both men turning to look.  “Hi, JC.”  She waved rather cheerily.  Justin found himself smirking quietly at the sight.  She was a little flushed and from what he could tell, she had sex written all over her—just the way he liked her.

“Hey,” he responded with a grin.  “I told J you guys could have told me if it was a bad time.  I know things have been kinda crazy for you two lately.”

Her head shook no, her eyes sliding to Justin as if she was silently questioning him if he’d told or if JC just knew.  Justin widened his eyes at her—JC just knew—and she nodded discreetly in response.  Funny how easy it was to communicate with someone without using any words whatsoever.  Especially someone you know so well. 

Cassidy sat down on the sofa they’d just consummated as Justin grabbed his cell phone, which had been turned off.   JC followed and took a seat in the lone chair angled across from the couch.  “Wow, he even had his phone turned off.  That doesn’t happen very often.”

“Tell me about it,” Cassidy murmured quietly under her breath.  Of course, she’d left hers on just in case Lynn had called while out with Cody.  

“It’ll calm down,” JC was telling her. 

Cassidy found herself rolling her eyes, even though she didn’t mean to.  Was she subconsciously bitter over the situation they were in because of Justin’s celebrity status?  She hadn’t had much time to think about it before, but it definitely wasn’t a plus in their relationship.  And why did she have this undeniable urge to spill all her guts to JC?  A man she’d barely known for a week.  “You know, with my ex, he had just enough familiarity to get the perks, but not all this press.”  She tilted her head before continuing.  “Come to think of it… He still used what he had in a bad way.”  She shook the thought of his cheating out of her head.  She was way over that and definitely didn’t want Justin’s close friend to think she was still bitter.

“Yeah… I kinda know what you—”  He stopped himself for some reason.  “I’m lucky in that sense too.”  She realized he didn’t want to sound like he was rubbing it in that he didn’t have it so bad when it came to the paparazzi.

“Uh oh.”  Justin looked over at them both, the phone still up to his right ear.  “Things got a little crazy at the restaurant so they’re watching a movie in mom’s room.”   He took the phone from his ear and was clearly dialing another number.

“What do you mean things got crazy?” Cassidy asked, rising to her feet.  An immediate panic took over as she rushed towards him.  “Is he okay?”

Justin was shrugging his shoulders and shaking his head back and forth.  He hit a button on his phone and turned it on speaker, Cassidy could hear it ringing.   “Everything’s fine,” his mom answered, instead of the usual hello.

“So what happened?” Justin asked.

“Another patron of the restaurant was taking photos with her camera phone.  Nothing major.  We just thought it might be a good idea to leave.” 

Cassidy figured the “we” meant security.  “Can I talk to Cody?” She joined in the conversation.

“He actually just conked out.  Do you want me to wake him up?”

Justin was staring at Cassidy, letting her answer the question as he held the phone between them both.  “No, that’s okay.”  It was barely seven o’clock but it had been a tiring day—a tiring week as far as that goes.

“If he’s asleep now is he gonna be awake all night?” Justin was asking softly, obviously to Cassidy and not to his mom through the phone. 

But before Cassidy had a chance to respond, Lynn was offering to keep him in her room.  “I’ve got two beds,” she added.

“It’s up to you,” Justin told Cassidy.

“Why don’t we see what he wants to do when he wakes up.  If he wakes up,” Cassidy decided.

“Okay.  I’ll give you guys a call a little later.” 

Cassidy shuffled back to the couch and plopped down.  Why did she feel so exhausted all the sudden?  Looking up, she barely realized that JC was just ending his own phone call.  “We’re gonna have to rain check dinner,” the man informed.

Justin’s tall frame came around in front of the sofa, just before collapsing beside her.  “You sure, C?” he asked.

JC nodded.  “Something came up.”

Cassidy found herself looking at him oddly, but he obviously didn’t notice.  “Alright.”  Both men stood.   “Another time, then.”

Nodding again, JC grinned in Cassidy’s direction.  “Nice seeing you again.”

“You too,” she replied, bringing her knees up and resting her bare heels on the edge of the couch cushion.   The two men disappeared out of sight, Cassidy didn’t bother to watch.  Some random fan had been taking video of her son in a restaurant, without her or Justin even there, and for some reason it made her feel completely violated.  This was something she was really going to have to get used to.

When Justin returned he positioned himself lengthwise on the chocolate-colored, leather couch, obviously waiting for her to straighten her legs so he could lay down on her.   She did, his head resting on her thighs like it couldn’t possibly belong anywhere else.  Flat on his back, he looked up at her with caring eyes.  “You okay?”

She shrugged.  “Not really.”  Her hand fell to his face, her fingers tracing along his brow and the well-defined bridge of his nose.  Studying him, she smoothed her touch over the stubble on his cheeks before softly trailing her thumb across his perfectly shaped lips. 

“I know,” he said simply.  “I’m sorry.”

This time she shook her head.   “It’s an adjustment.”  Her hand smoothed to the top of his head.  He hadn’t had a haircut since they’d reconnected and she found herself grinning as she noticed the start of what would soon be curls if he didn’t get it cut soon. 

He grabbed her hand and held it against his warm cheek.  Then he kissed her palm.  “For me too.   I’m not used to dealing with it in this way.  I know it’s not as weird for me as it is for you, but I feel totally unsettled over this.  I do.”

For some reason she just had to kiss him after that.  Leaning down, she pressed her lips to his for just a brief moment.  He was grinning when she pulled up.  “Do you think JC really had something come up, or was he just saying that because he thought we wanted to be alone?”

Justin sat up, stretching out his long legs and resting his bare feet on the glass-topped coffee table.  “Probably both.”  Clutching one of her hands, he twined his fingers with hers and rested both on his thigh.   “He’s seeing someone who’s staying here.  I don’t really know all the details.”

“Oh,” she said simply.

Things were quiet for a couple of minutes after that.  She laid her head on his shoulder, enjoying his warmth and comfort.  There were a lot of feelings inside of her and she wasn’t quite sure how to communicate any of them.  What she did know how to do was admire him, a feat not difficult to do as he was sprawled out next to her.   From the chest down she studied him, his white t-shirt loose but still revealing the amazing build that was underneath it because of the way he was sitting.  The dark jeans he wore were sort of baggy, but thanks to gravity the outline of his muscular thighs still managed to be noticeable.  His ankles were crossed, still perched on the table, and for some reason even his feet were attractive at the moment.

She was crazy in love with this man.  More so than she’d ever been with anyone.

Bumping the top of her head with the side of his, he finally broke the silence.  “I know my mom said he was sleeping, but is it weird that I just want to go check on him and make sure he’s okay?”

At that Cassidy instantly grinned.  “No, not at all.  I think we should.”

Justin dropped his feet from the table and planted them on the floor.  “We could pack his bag?  In case he wants to spend the night?”  He was staring at her with expectant eyes, as if he was hoping she agreed with his suggestion.

“Then we wouldn’t look so pathetic?” she said with a grin.

“Yeah.”  He shook his head as if he hadn’t meant to agree.  “I mean, no.  Is it pathetic to want to check on him?”

For some reason the fact that he was still “learning” how to become a parent was completely adorable.  She also realized that being able to share feelings of concern with someone felt really good.  It was nice not having all the weight on her shoulders for a change.  Brushing her fingers down the back of his neck, she leaned in and kissed him sweetly, letting the touch linger longer than she’d planned just because it felt so damn good every time it happened.  “Not at all,” she finally said with a grin.  “It would be pathetic if we didn’t have the desire to check on him.”

Justin grinned wide and proud.  “I know he’s with my mom and everything, but still.”

Cassidy nodded and stood up.   “Totally,” was all she said, obviously in agreement.

They packed a couple of things—mainly pajamas and clothes for the next day—and were out the door.   Only two steps in the hall, Cassidy remembered she’d forget something.  “We didn’t grab his toothbrush,” she said to Justin.

“I’ll go back and get it,” he said and swiped his keycard before rushing back into their suite.

Cassidy stepped two feet towards Lynn’s room when a female figure came barreling around the corner just down the hall.  She was almost knocked off her feet when she realized who it was.

What the fuck was Justin’s ex-wife doing in their hotel, on their floor, for chrissake! 

Justin heard the screech of voices and knew instantly what was happening.  He ran out of his room, still clutching Cody’s toothbrush, thankful that neither one of them had laid a hand on the other.  That was the last thing he or Cassidy needed, because Macie would do anything for a headline at this point.

But he could tell Cassidy was having a damn hard time holding back, both of her fists clutched at her sides and her fingers clearly digging into her palms from what he could see.   

Macie smirked, her short blond hair partially pulled back, the rest hanging loosely around her face.  As usual she looked completely done up in a completely undone way.  It was a look she’d mastered well.  He knew all about it—unfortunately.  Her ice blue eyes had an evil glare to them as her line of sight changed from Cassidy to him.  “I’m surprised, J.  You didn’t tell her the movie you’re promoting is the one we did together?”

Justin’s stomach instantly dropped.  He’d planned on telling her… sometime before they watched it together anyway.  The thing was, he and Macie weren’t doing promotions together.  In fact, there had been specific instructions that they weren’t supposed to be anywhere near each other.   This encounter was totally Macie’s doing.  She’d turned into a vengeful and spiteful bitch and now he had himself in one helluva situation.

Cassidy was looking at him, too, now, a world of anger, hurt and confusion in her eyes.  “I was going to tell you,” he said softly.

She didn’t say anything, but she didn’t have to.  She was visibly upset, at least to him anyway.

Macie laughed and Cassidy instantly focused her attention back on the nuisance.  Her arms crossed over her chest and her stance straightened.  “Can you just not handle that he had a life before you and that he has an even better life after you?”

“Puh lease—” Macie started, but Cassidy was quick to cut her off.

“Yes, please, shut the fuck up.”

By now Justin noticed his mom step out into the hall, a look of horror clouded Lynn’s features as she realized what was happening and clearly mouthed the words “oh shit.”  He discreetly nodded his head for her to go back inside as Cassidy continued with her well-deserved rant.

“Neither one of us cares what you do, what you have to say, or what kind of trouble you seem to get yourself into.   So promote your fucking movie, but please, stay the fuck away from me, my boyfriend and our son.”  The look Cassidy gave Justin from the corner of her eye as she strutted past was definitely not a good one.  He didn’t move as she walked 10 steps down the hall and knocked on the door to his mom’s room.  His eyes didn’t leave her until she was completely inside.   At least she was still considering him her boyfriend.  That had to be a good thing, right?

“What the fuck, Macie?” he was questioning quietly.  “Why are you purposely causing trouble?”

“I just thought she should know,” the girl remarked smugly. 

“How the hell would you know if she did or not?” His voice raised up a notch and he automatically quieted himself, wondering where the hell his security team was all the sudden.  Little did he know T was standing about three strides behind him.   “And more importantly, why do you care?  You left me, remember?”  He shook his head, irritated that he was having this conversation.  It was absolutely ridiculous.  “I’ve moved on.  Shouldn’t you be happy about that?”

Inside Lynn’s suite, Cassidy had quickly checked to make sure Cody was still asleep—which he was—before slumping into an open chair and letting her head fall.  She didn’t understand.  Why would Justin keep such a major fact from her?  She wouldn’t have cared one way or the other and now he’d put her in a horrible position.

Lynn was standing just a few feet away, watching her, probably wanting to say something but not sure what.   Finally Cassidy looked up at the woman.   “Why didn’t he tell me?  Do you know?”

“I honestly didn’t know that you weren’t aware that this was the movie they did together.”

“I didn’t even know they had done a movie together, ever!” Cassidy remarked, her annoyance obviously not under control.

When the knock came through, she knew it was Justin and frankly she wasn’t sure what the hell to say to him.   Standing up, she met him half way to the door.  “Cody’s fine.  I’ll meet you back at our room.”  She hoped his ex-wife was nowhere to be seen, but right now she couldn’t figure out who she wanted to see less. 

Justin’s head swayed regretfully as the door shut behind Cassidy and he stared at his mother.  His eyes were burning, not that he was on the verge of tears or anything, but to say he wasn’t upset—mainly at himself—would be an understatement for sure.  “Why do I do these things to myself?” he finally asked.

His mom shook his head.   “Sweetheart, why didn’t you tell her?  Running into your ex-wife would have been much easier if—”

Justin stopped her.  “I know.  I was going to tell her.  Later tonight, I guess.  Definitely before tomorrow.  I never thought we’d run into Macie.  I mean, there were instructions on this.  We were not supposed to be anywhere near each other.”

Lynn sighed loudly.  “Don’t worry about Cody.  He’s fine.  You better go talk to her.”

He nodded his head.  His mother was always right.  He wasn’t sure what he was supposed to say, but he knew he better figure out something.

© BrandyRae 2007

Justin was nervous returning to their room.  He didn’t quite know what to say to her.   Nothing that came to mind seemed to justify, with any good reason, why he hadn’t mentioned the fact that Macie was in the film he was promoting.  Honestly, the truth was, he just didn’t want to think about it—let alone deal with it.  He just wanted his evil, bitch-of-an-ex-wife to go away.  He was tired of dealing with the drama.

But could he tell Cassidy all that?  Would she believe him if he did?

Fact of the matter was, their scenes together weren’t that much.  There were no love scenes—thank God—or anything even close, which only made it even more pathetic that he had failed to mention anything about it.

With a sigh he stepped into the front room—empty, quiet and just how they’d left it.   Cassidy was nowhere to be seen.  He shuffled his feet a bit as he made way towards their bedroom.  He realized instantly that she was in the bathroom and that the shower was running.  Strutting towards it, he tried the handle to find it locked.   Softly he cursed under his breath.  This could not be good.

Cassidy needed to pull herself together.  She couldn’t believe she was crying over the whole situation, but she was.  The shower had seemed the safest place to go.  It had just been such a whirlwind week.  Finding out Justin had neglected to tell her that his ex-wife was in the hotel, to promote the movie they made together, was not how she wanted to top it off. 

She just didn’t understand why he hadn’t told her.  Surely he must have realized the chances of running into her were high.  Some kind of warning would have been nice!

Letting the hot water pound into the top of her head, droplets slid down her face, mixing with her tears as she tried so hard to get a grip on her emotions.  She wasn’t normally a crier, and she hated it when she turned into one.  Although, she did realize that crying to herself in the shower was better than loosing her temper and taking it out on Justin.  She didn’t want to be that girl anymore, but she wasn’t sure if she wanted to be this girl either.

Finally, she shut off the water, deciding it was time to face what was going on and quit hiding.   She took her time drying off, moisturizing and brushing her teeth.  Feeling like the tears had subsided somewhat, she wrapped up in one of the thick, white, complimentary, full-length bathrobes.

When she finally stepped out of the bathroom, hot steam following, she found Justin sitting on the edge of the bed, staring right at her.  From what she gathered by the look on his face, he’d been sitting in that spot, waiting, for as long as he’d been back.   She was guessing it had been more than a couple of minutes.  Then she found herself wondering if he noticed that she’d been crying.  She hated that she was so self conscious over something so silly.

After two seconds of eye contact, she felt herself tearing up again.  Who the hell was she trying to kid? Thinking she could actually keep her tears to herself?

His chin dropped, like he couldn’t look at her any longer, and his head was shaking as his hands smoothed into his hair.  “I don’t know what I was thinking,” he said softly, still looking down at the carpet.

By the time she perched herself on the bed beside him, she was full-on crying again.  It was a completely different emotion for her in regards to relationships.  Hurt instead of anger?  She didn’t know how to process it.  “I need complete honesty in a relationship,” she told him quietly, almost in a whisper.

“I know.”  He still didn’t look at her, but she wasn’t exactly looking at him either.  Instead she was beginning to make out a very subtle design in the mocha colored carpet.  “There’s nothing I can say to justify not telling you.   I’m sorry.”

What he was saying was true, but it didn’t mean that she didn’t want to hear some type of reasoning.  Wiping the dampness from her surely puffy eyes, she finally looked over at him.  Immediately he returned the gaze.  “You must’ve had a reason, though, right?”

His chin was her direction, but his eyes dropped down again, focusing more on the intricate-patterned cream, chocolate and gold duvet cover.  “I just didn’t want to deal with it.”

Of course she wanted to mention how much easier it would have been for her to deal with his ex if she’d have been prepared, but it seemed unnecessary.  Cassidy was sure he realized that already.  No one wanted to deal with any of the shit they were dealing with.  Did that mean it was a good idea to pretend it didn’t exist?  No.   But she doubted she actually needed to remind Justin of that.  She’d never been one to lecture.

Removing the towel that had been wrapped around her wet hair, she rubbed the soft cotton over her face until the evidence of her tears was gone.  Then she discarded it to the floor and brought a hand to his stubbled cheek.  “We really need a vacation,” she told him softly, studying the apologetic look in his eyes.

A gentle smirk fell from his lips, a tiny grin accompanying it.  “No fucking kidding.”

“I’m not mad at you,” she finally told him.  “I was, at first, but I know you weren’t deliberately trying to be deceitful.”  Everything she was saying was coming from the deepest place in her heart.  “With everything I’ve been through, I should have major trust issues, but I trust you—completely.”   Softly she grinned.  “Some might call me crazy, and maybe I am, but I know that I’m the only woman you want to be with right now.  I know what happened tonight has nothing to do with still wanting her.”

His eyes softened as he stared at her with caring blue eyes.  “I definitely don’t want to be with her and as far as you knowing that you’re the only woman I want to be with right now?  Well, I’d have to correct you and say that you’re the only woman I want to be with ever.”  Cassidy couldn’t help but smile at that.   His hand reached up to her head, pushing her damp hair back from her forehead.   “I’m sorry for not telling you.  It was stupid, I know.  And I know you haven’t asked, but just so you know, we’re hardly even in the movie together.  We weren’t, like, love interests or anything.  And as far as the promotions go?  We weren’t supposed to do anything together or even be anywhere near each other.  Obviously she purposely found out where we were so she could try and cause trouble.”

Cassidy let out a heavy breath of air.  “Was she this vindictive when you were married?”

Justin shook his head and made a “pshhh” sound.  “I don’t know,” he finally answered, his fingertips brushing down the side of her head again.  “I think I just overlooked it.”

Leaning in, she pressed a tender kiss to his lips—so warm and soft and smooth.  “Let’s not talk about it anymore.”

He nodded.  “I think I’m going to go take a shower, too, if you don’t mind.”

She nodded.  Of course she didn’t.

But before he got up, he closed the distance between them once more and pressed one kiss to the top of both her cheeks, just below her eyes.  “Don’t cry anymore,” he stated simply.  “I don’t like it.”  Then he got up and disappeared into the bathroom.

Rising to her feet, Cassidy let out a much needed breath.  She needed to decompress.   Her life was crazy.  If she actually stopped to think—which she was trying not to—things had been insane for the past six months, or longer.  Maybe a year even.  Were things ever going to settle down?

The way things were going, she didn’t think so.  Not anytime soon, anyway.

After slipping into a pair of black, calf-length sweat pants and a plain t-shirt, she ran a comb through her damp locks and pulled the mess back out of her face in a half pony/half bun.   She wasn’t going to worry about blow drying or styling.  She’d straighten before all the hoopla in the morning anyway.  Justin had invited her to watch him in action and she was looking quite forward to that.  Of course, she wouldn’t be able to give him her undivided attention.  Some of that would go to Cody, of course.  Lynn and Matt were going to be with their son when she wasn’t.   She’d love for Cody to be able to see his Daddy working, but there was absolutely no way they were going to subject him to the press.  Not when it wasn’t necessary.

Cassidy was afraid that very soon a nanny was definitely going to be essential.  But for now they had help and she was thankful for that.

Sighing, she propped up a couple of thick, fluffy pillows and grabbed the remote for the flat screen TV mounted on the wall across the ornately decorated room.  The thing had barely powered on when Justin appeared out of the steamy bathroom—one white towel wrapped around his waist, a second being used to dry his head and face.  He looked over at her as he draped the second towel around his neck.  “We never did eat.”

With all the excitement, she’d kind of forgot that.  “Should we order something?”

He nodded and slipped into a pair of long gray sweat shorts, walking both towels back into the bathroom and then re-emerging with his toothbrush hanging out of his mouth.  He held up a finger—one minute—and then disappeared again.  Cassidy picked up the leather-bound room service book from the nightstand and began thumbing through.

A minute later when Justin came out of the bathroom, looking all clean and refreshed, he hopped onto the mattress, on his knees, right in front of her.  “I want real food,” he told her.  “Hand me my phone.”

She looked at him kind of funny and reached for his cell phone off the nightstand closest to her.  A few seconds later he was telling who she was guessing was Matt, that he wanted a center-cut filet, medium rare, and a baked potato from the 5 star restaurant in the hotel.  “Babe?”  She felt a little diva-ish, but it wasn’t like Justin’s new assistant wasn’t getting paid to be there.

“Um, the same, except salad instead of a potato.”

He repeated it into the phone and then added a “Cool.  Thanks, Matt.”   Justin slapped his phone shut and handed it back to her, immediately reading the look on her face.  “We’re paying him.  He should do something besides just sit in a free hotel room.”

It barely registered that he’d said we’re paying him instead of I’m paying him.

“I know.”

“You’ll get used to it,” he said, leaning in towards her.  Sweetly, he pressed one firm kiss to her lips.  “My life, that is,” he added as he pulled away.

“I don’t know,” she remarked teasingly.  But was she really teasing?   Maybe partly not.

“After this movie opens and I’m done with all this, then I’m supposed to get back in the studio.  Things will quiet down then.  They always do.”  He grinned that handsomely boyish grin he was so good at.  “I still want to take a little vacation first, though.”

It hit her then, how their lives had joined together in a way neither one of them had even realized.  Things were serious.  Things could hardly be any more serious.   And she was quite fine with that.

Finally he relaxed, twisting around and sitting on his rear, knees up as his bare feet slid across the silky bedspread.  He grabbed the remote that had been sitting somewhere between them and hit the menu button.  “Should we order a movie?”

But Cassidy had other things on her mind.  “Justin,” she voiced simply, turning his direction.

“Huh?”   He was scrolling through the selection on the TV rather than looking at her.

“In all this craziness, things are oddly normal between us.”

She caught his attention with that, a confused look spread throughout his handsome features.   He still hadn’t shaved and his stubble was almost a beard.  “Why wouldn’t they be?”

Smiling, she didn’t exactly answer what he was asking.  “We really haven’t been together for very long, but I feel ridiculously comfortable with you.  Like we’ve been together forever.”

“And you’re just now noticing that?”  He brought a hand up animatedly.   “And let me just add to that—that even though it feels like we’ve been together forever, it still feels exciting and new and not a minute goes by when I don’t think about how badly I want you—all the time.”

Her smile widened.  “Well, yes.”

“That goes for you too?”  he asked, his head tilted just slightly to one side.

“Definitely.”

“So where did this discussion come from?”

Cassidy shrugged.  “I don’t know.  Maybe it’s you being back to work and me feeling surprisingly okay with it all.  I mean, not that I thought I wouldn’t, but it’s all kind of crazy and still it feels really normal.”

“Well,” Justin sighed, touching a hand to her forearm, “not that I like to bring it up or anything, but I’m sure life wasn’t exactly normal for you before, being married to an NFL quarterback and all.  It couldn’t be that different.”

It was extremely different, but there were definitely similar aspects.  He was right about that.  “Well,” she said it this time, a little bit of oomph to her voice.   “You are absolutely wonderful and he was a complete jerk.  That makes it very different.”

His grin was the only acknowledgment of her compliment.  He moved on quickly instead.   “Okay, well let me just ask you, since you brought up my work and all.   Eventually I’m going to have to go on tour.  Do you think you and Cody will be able to go with me?  I mean, as much as possible?  I realize he’s going to have school and I totally understand if you don’t want him to miss going to a regular school.  I did for a big part of my life, but that’s beside the point…”   He was rambling and Cassidy found it absolutely adorable.

“Justin, I’m not opposed to home schooling him part of the time, but we can figure that out as it comes along.”

He nodded, one of those rare shy grins across his face.  “Sorry, just a thought that crossed my mind, that’s all.”

Leaning in, she pressed a tender kiss to the corner of his mouth.  As she started to pull away, to respond to his words, his hand caught the back of her neck as he continued the kiss, his tongue slipping past her lips.  Her eyes closed automatically and she realized in an instant that she needed to have him—again.  Without a second thought, both of her hands found the warm, sculpted feel of his shoulders as she strained her body to lean in even closer. 

Quickly he compensated for her efforts and was guiding her back the other way, his kiss consuming her needingly as he maneuvered his way in front of her until she was falling, the back of her head landing on the fluffed, down pillow.

“I love you so much,” she managed to tell him.  “I love that those kind of thoughts cross your mind.”

His moist lips smiling against her, he said, “How could they not?  You’re amazing.  I want you and Cody with me all the time.”

Cassidy’s hands found their way down his strong back, stopping just at the curve of his rear, his sweats loose and practically sliding right off, but instead resting halfway down his butt.   Damn, she loved the way his body felt against her touch.  Bending her left knee, his weight settled on her, his arousal more than apparent.  “You’re amazing,” she said breathily.  “You don’t even know how thankful I am that you saw us that day at the game."

She could still feel his smile as he nestled his face against her cheek, his soft stubble tickling her flesh.  He hummed, happy and content-like.  “Me too.”   Then he pressed a wet kiss to the tender spot just below her ear.  “How long’s it been since we called Matt?” His lips broke away just long enough to speak.

For some reason she found it difficult to answer when he was kissing her in such a way.   Her smile big, her breath caught short as his mouth skidded down the side of her neck.  “Ten minutes?” she finally answered, her voice ending with a giggle as one of his hands pressed into the flesh above her hip.  How he even managed to get a grip on her there she wasn’t sure, but it was a ticklish spot and he knew it.   And she loved that he knew those things about her.

“Plenty of time,” he remarked coolly as he skillfully slipped that hand around her waist and down the back of her sweats.  He gripped her flesh playfully, grinning wide as his mouth made way back to hers.  His darkened blue eyes searched her face before he kissed her once again.  “We needed this tonight.”

She felt herself smiling against him again.  “Sex?”

He stopped and looked in her the eye.  “The alone time.”

Cassidy nodded.  “Alone time for us usually means sex.”

His lips were on her again, soft and warm and then gently pulling on her bottom lip before parting.  “I can’t think of anything better to do when we’re alone.”   He was looking incredibly devilish, not to mention sexy, and somehow boyish all at the same time.  It was impossible to explain and completely irresistible.

With her arms wrapped loosely around his back, she reveled in the feel of his smooth skin against her palms.  “I can’t think of anyone else I ever want to be alone with.”  She didn’t break the eye contact they had for one second.

“Oooh,” he said, brushing his nose against hers.  “I like that.”

Smiling, Cassidy agreed.  “Me too.”

“Okay, how’s this,” he added, as if he was about to try and top what she’d said.   “I can’t imagine anyone ever making me feel the way I feel when I’m with you.”

“I—”

As she tried to respond, he out voiced her.  “I can’t imagine ever making love to anyone else but you.  I can’t imagine having a child with anyone but you.   I can’t imagine living a single day of my life without you in it.”

Lifting her head, she kissed him this time.  It was so sweet and pure.  She could happily imagine kissing him for the rest of her life.  “Me too,” she answered simply, smiling big.

She collapsed against the pillow again, their kiss not waning in the slightest.  “I like that a lot,” he finally said.  Cassidy giggled.  It was all she could do.

Seconds later when his cell phone starting buzzing on the dresser, she was still smiling.   Even as he broke away from her just enough to reach above her, his bare abdomen right above her face as he stretched to grab his phone from the bedside table.  Her palm smoothed across his taught stomach nearly causing him to chuckle his “hello,” but he recovered quickly, straightening and straddling her.  “Oh, hey mom.”   Cassidy listened intently at the realization it was Lynn.  “Okay.  I’ll be right there.”  Justin shut his phone and looked down at her.  “He’s awake and he wants us.”  He was already hopping up.  “I’m gonna go get him."

Cassidy nodded, sitting up and watching as Justin skipped out of the room, not bothering to put anything else on, not even his shoes.

It was five minutes later when father and son returned.  Justin marched Cody straight into their bedroom, Cody’s sleepy figured latched onto the bigger man.  The little boys arms clung around his Daddy’s neck.  Cody’s legs were hooked on Justin’s waist as he carried him in.  “Here we are,” Justin voiced, plopping Cody down beside Cassidy.

“Hi Mommy,” Cody fell against his mother’s side, hugging his arms around her.   Justin watched the interaction and his heart swelled.  He loved seeing them together.  He loved the family they’d become.  He’d never been so happy.

Climbing onto the bed, Justin settled in on the other side of his son, Cody in the middle of them both.  It was a great feeling and a great place to be.

“Did you have fun with Grandma Lynn?” Cassidy asked, running a hand over Cody’s curls as she so often did.

“Yeah.”   His answer drawn out and slow, it was obvious by his tone that he was still sleepy.   He had every right to be.  His life had changed dramatically.  Not to mention he hadn’t been sleeping too good the past few nights.  Justin hated to think why that was.

“Are you hungry, baby?” Cassidy asked.

“No.”

“Should we get your PJ’s on?”

“Okay.”

“I’ll get ‘em,” Justin volunteered.  He’d dropped Cody’s bag right inside the door.  Hopping up, he trotted into the main room.  Then returned with Cody’s dark blue backpack, pulling out the matching forest green pajama set of pants and a short sleeved shirt.  He’d barely handed them off to Cassidy when there was a loud knock on the door and Justin was jogging back again.  He knew it was the food.  It had to be.

He opened the door and sure enough, there stood Matt, two signature bags in his hands and a bottle tucked in the crook of his arm.  “The restaurant sent a complimentary bottle of wine,” he announced.

Justin shrugged.  “Okay.  Hey, can you bring it in and set it on the table in the bedroom?”

Matt shuffled inside and Justin shut the door, noticing that the woman he’d passed in the hall a few minutes before when he’d picked up Cody was still there.  She was talking on a cell phone, but it was still a little unusual.  Or maybe he was just being paranoid with all they’d been through lately.

Justin walked into the bedroom as Matt was taking the food out and setting it on the table.   Moving close to his new assistant, he spoke quietly.  “When you leave can you tell T that there’s a woman hanging out in the hallway?  I’ve seen her twice now.”

Cassidy was heading towards them, looking slightly curious.

“Okay,” Matt answered.

“Thanks, and we’ll see you at seven?”

The man nodded and left.

Cassidy looked at Justin, looked at the food and then looked back at Cody.  “You sure you’re not hungry, baby?” she asked him.

“No thanks, Mommy.”

Justin smirked quietly at the manner’s his son displayed.  Then he smiled contentedly at the sleepy look in his eyes.  It was such a sweet sight.  He was so in love with his life at the moment.  He couldn’t ask for anything more.

He and Cassidy sat at the table and ate while Cody stayed perched at the head of their big hotel bed, watching one of the 24 hour cartoon channels on TV.  Each time Justin looked over, his son seemed closer and closer to sleep.  Without thinking, he stood and dimmed the lights.  When he sat back down, Cassidy was grinning sappily at him.   “What?”

She shook her head.  “It’s just nice, that’s all.”

Now he was grinning sappily.  With a nod, he agreed, “Yeah, it is.”

By the time they were finished with their late dinner, Cody was sound asleep.  Justin carefully carried Cody into the next room, where Cassidy was turning down the bed, laid him down and kissed him softly on the head.  “Love you, son,” he whispered quietly, even though Cody was sound asleep.  Cassidy pulled the covers up and Cody snuggled up to his pillow automatically.  Justin watched as she kissed his forehead and backed away.  Without a thought he grabbed her hand and led her out, shutting the door between their rooms all but a crack.

“Tired?” Justin asked, releasing the hold he’d had on her.

“A little,” she answered, pulling her hair down from her head and letting it fall to her shoulders.  He found himself smiling again at the natural beauty she held.  She was gorgeous to him all the time, but he loved it when she was completely casual and relaxed.  Maybe he just loved that they could be that comfortable with each other.   Especially after dealing with the façade of his ex.  She’d always had an image to uphold, even with him.  He hadn’t realized how much he’d hated it then, but looking back he realized more and more how completely wrong he and Macie had been for each other.

Thank God he’d found Cassidy.  Thank God he was in a healthy relationship now.

She disappeared into the bathroom and he turned off the lights, making sure the alarm was set for 6:00.  He didn’t even want to think about the long day he had tomorrow, but at least he had his family there with him.  The most important people in his life were right by his side and that felt amazing.

A minute or two later she came out in this barely-there pajama shirt and inwardly he groaned, realizing they never had a chance to finish what they’d started earlier and knowing that his sleeping son was in the next room.  He eyed her curiously as he stepped past her and made way into the bathroom himself, where he splashed some cold water on his face and brushed his teeth.

She was in bed when he returned, snuggled up under the bedding, breaking sight from the TV to eye him sweetly.  He dropped his shorts next to the bed and crawled in beside her, not hesitating to get as close as possible and wrap every limb around her.  It caused instant giggles in her and that made him squeeze her even more.  “I love holding you,” he said softly, pressing his lips just in front of her ear.

Her body shifted as she turned to face him, kissing the tip of his nose.  “I like it too.”

“But is it bad that I want you so bad right now and Cody’s sleeping in the next room?”

She kissed him sweetly again, this time at the top of his cheek.  “Parent’s have sex with their kids in the next room all the time.”

“You’re right,” he said, smoothing a hand to her head.  Then he gently pushed her down on her back and climbed on top of her.  Playfully he attached her neck, chest and shoulders with kisses.  She was giggling uncontrollably and every second more he felt himself falling deeper and deeper in love.

He finally stopped and she took in a deep breath.  “We should probably try and be quiet though.  If he wakes up and comes in here it’d probably ruin the mood.”

“Probably,” he agreed just before tenderly kissing her the flesh below her jaw.  It wasn’t giggles coming from her now, it was more of a satisfied hum and it only urged him to continue.

“Justin…” His name fell from her lips, her voice weighted with arousal.  “You do everything right.”

He wanted to agree, but he couldn’t.  He rose up just enough to catch her eye.   “Not everything.  I fucked up pretty bad earlier.”

She smiled ruefully.  “I already forgot.”

Sweetly he kissed her lips.  “Good.  It won’t happen again.  Not like that.”
 

© BrandyRae 2007

It was 3:30 PM when they finally made it to the peace and quiet of their hotel suite. Cassidy was beat-tired. She could only imagine how Justin felt. It had been a long day and it wasn’t even over. She just wanted to lie down and take a nap.

“I’m going to take a quick shower, wash all this crap off me,” Justin told her.

She nodded in understanding, knowing he was referring to the light bit of make-up he’d had on. “Don’t be upset if I’m asleep when you come out,” she said with a grin.

“Oh, don’t worry, I know how to wake you up,” he smirked.

Plopping down on the bed, she flashed a grin before he disappeared in the bathroom. Part of her wanted to hop in with him, but the other part needed a few minutes to just not move. Slipping off the Christian Louboutin heels she’d been wearing all day, she let out a deep breath and relaxed her head against the pillows. The bed was neatly made. The room was clean. Suddenly, she was wondering how her son was doing out with Lynn. She hadn’t heard from them since they’d left. She figured no news was good news.

Closing her eyes, she pictured Justin in the shower, naked, and smiled. Then she thought of how pleasing it had been to watch him all day. If only she had enough energy to join him. For now the visual in her brain would have to do. She just couldn’t seem to motivate herself to get off the bed. Next thing she knew her eyes were too heavy to keep open any longer. She dozed off, a smile on her lips.



It was the weight of his fit frame that woke her. He’d positioned himself directly on top of her, smelling absolutely wonderful, clean and fresh. She grinned, taking in a deep breath, her eyes still closed.

“Did you have a nice little catnap?” Justin asked, sexiness just oozing from his vocal chords without any effort on his part, she was sure.

She finally let her eyes pop open and hummed. “You smell good,” she smiled.

“That’s ‘cause I just got out of the shower.”

“Makes me just want to eat you right up.” Her hand rose to his head, smoothing over his hardly damp hair.

Now he was smiling too. “I have to ask you something before you distract me anymore with sex,” he said.

With a chuckle, Cassidy told him, “okay.”

“Did you go out with Travis O’Connell?”

She couldn’t help but look at him funny. “Does he look like my type?” she asked in response, arching the left side of her brow for effect.

“If I had to guess I’d probably say that I wasn’t your type either, but here we are, aren’t we?”

His tone was a bit serious so she decided it may not be a good time to toy with him, even though she really wanted to. “I did not go out with Travis O’Connell.”

Justin just looked at her, like there was more on his mind, but he didn’t want to ask.

“I didn’t sleep with him, either, if that’s what you’re thinking.”

Justin still didn’t say anything.

“Were you jealous? Thinking maybe I did?” She was grinning again, even though it probably wasn’t all that appropriate at the moment.

“He called you a spitfire,” he finally told her, straight faced.

“Really? Okay, I did go out with a friend of his.”

“Ah ha! The truth comes out.”

“Justin, I did have a life before we met.”

“I know,” he said softly. “I just wasn’t ready to be reminded of it.” Finally he let a grin form at his lips. “It’s not that difficult thinking about you married to the jerk, but when I think of you with other guys, and in the way we discussed them when we first met, it’s kind of hard for me.”

Cassidy smiled. “Tell me your number and I’ll tell you mine.”

“Oh, hell no,” he laughed, kissing her before she could say anything. Her body wanted to indulge in every ounce of him, but her mind was still reeling.

“Afraid I might run away if I knew?”

“No, I’m afraid yours might be bigger than mine,” he smarted off with a smirk.

Her brow immediately furrowed into displeasure. “That was kind of a not nice thing to say, don’t you think?”

His features fell immediately blank. “I swear I didn’t mean it like that.”

“Just because I’m open and honest when it comes to sex, does not mean that I’ve slept with the entire male population.” She was mad. She couldn’t help it. She was scooting away from him, feeling more hurt by the second.

His look of panic was completely deserved. He should have never said what he’d said. “Babe, I swear that’s not what I meant. I just…”

“No, obviously, you did. I can count my number on my fingers. Can you? I bet you can’t even count yours on your fingers and toes. Probably not even on your fingers and toes and my fingers and toes!”

Crawling towards her on his knees, he was shaking his head, obviously confused as to how he’d gotten them to such a place. Luckily for him, her back was already against the headboard and she couldn’t scoot any farther away from him. “Stop for a minute,” he told her. “Cassie, I’m sorry. Okay? I do not think of you like that. I love how open and honest you are about everything, not just sex, and I do not think you’ve slept with the entire male population. And you’re right, I probably couldn’t count my number on both of our fingers and toes put together. I’m not really sure, to be honest with you, but…” Realization clouded his eyes and he smirked. “I just told you way more than I wanted to.”

She was grinning, wide. Before saying anything else, she planted a kiss on his lips with a smack. “That’s okay. It’s probably more like all my fingers and maybe a couple toes.”

Justin covered his ears. “I don’t want to know,” he said with a grin. Then he repeated it in a whisper, “I don’t want to know.”

“Justin,” she pulled his hands down and told him very stoutly, “I love you.”

He grinned, sort of shyly, “I love you too.”

“I don’t care how many women you’ve slept with before me as long as you don’t plan on sleeping with anymore now that you’re with me.”

“Me too,” he said.

“We cannot freak out every time we run into an ex, or a friend of an ex, whatever. We just can’t. Especially me, because I’m sure it’ll happen to me more than it’ll happen to you.”

His head tilted with faux annoyance. “Thanks.”

“Hello, you just said it’s more than 40 at least. I mean, thankfully we’re not talking Gene Simmons territory or anything… are we?”

“No! Hell no!”

Cassidy chuckled. “When is your mom coming back with Cody?” she asked.

He looked at the clock. “Any time.”

“Damn. I really have this urge I need to satisfy.”

His grin turned into something sexy and wicked. “Don’t worry. We’ll have plenty of time for that this weekend.”

“Really?”

“Yep. There’s something we need to discuss.”

“What’s that?”

“Which bikinis you want to pack for Mexico.”

“Is that so?”

“Yes. I’m taking you on a romantic getaway.”

“And who is watching our son?”

“Our parents. Mine part of the time and yours part of the time.”

“You have this planned already?” Cassidy was feeling quite smitten by his spontaneity. To be honest, no one had ever gone to such an extent for her. EVER.

He nodded. “You’re not mad, are you?”

“Mad? Are you crazy? I’m ecstatic!” She threw her arms around him and squeezed him as tight as she could.

“Oh thank God. I was nervous you’d be upset I planned it without asking first.”

Shaking her head no, she kissed his barely stubbled cheek. “We need this… bad.”

“I know,” he agreed, his hands running down her back. “That’s why I did it.”

“Oh my gosh. When do we leave and how many nights do we get alone?”

Justin chuckled, obviously amused. “Just three nights. We leave tomorrow.”

She was so giddy, she could hardly contain it. “Don’t even tell me where we’re going,” she said excitedly. “It doesn’t matter! I plan on keeping you in bed the whole time anyway!” And with that she nearly tackled him, pushing him down on the bed and falling on top of him.

Laughing, he curled his arms around her as she attacked his face with kisses. “Man, this is a way better reaction then I ever imagined.”

She stilled then, looking him in the eye. “No ones ever done anything like this for me,” she told him with all seriousness.

“Are you kidding?”

She shook her head no.

“Well, be assured that this is only the beginning, sweetheart. I plan on spoiling you as much as possible, because you deserve it.”
 

© BrandyRae 2008

Less than twenty-four hours later they had kissed Cody goodbye and boarded a private jet headed for Cabo San Lucas.  Cassidy was high on adrenaline.  She’d been so excited she woke up at four o’clock in the morning and then couldn’t go back to sleep.  It wasn’t like she’d never been to exotic places before.  She’d traveled all over the world.  Those trips had just never played out in such a manner.  No one had ever really pampered her, especially not to such a degree.  Her tough demeanor gave off the impression that she wouldn’t want to be pampered, but that was so not the case.  Justin got that.  One of the many reasons she was so head over heels for him.

With a smile she sat next to him on the lounge.  They weren’t alone.  They’d hitched a ride with some big movie producer and his very blonde, very big-boobed girlfriend in one helluva skimpy outfit, but Justin’s eyes, so far, were on their best behavior.  Now T, who was also traveling with them; his eyes were having a little bit more difficult of a time, which Cassidy found quite amusing.  Especially since he was trying to be so discreet about it, but she could practically spot the drool from across the cabin.

Justin’s hand fell to her knee, but he was deep in conversation.  The movie guy, Jerry Bratman was his name, was pitching Justin his next project.  Cassidy realized that’s how they’d hitched a ride.  She had no complaints.  The plane ride was barely an hour.

She was offered champagne and she took it, not sure what the occasion was, but feeling celebratory nevertheless.  Justin declined.  He was too busy “working”.  For the entire trip, she sipped her tall flute of champagne, listened to their conversation and secretly enjoyed the warm of his thigh next to hers and the touch of his hand on her leg.  In no time at all they were landing and she was that much closer to having him all to herself.

Justin felt a little like he’d whored himself out to get the ride to the resort, but the opportunity had been way too convenient for him to pass up.  Flying commercial was hardly an option with all the media attention they were getting and Jerry had wanted to present his next project to Justin for some time.  It really wasn’t anything Justin was interested in, but he’d let his agent tell that to Jerry in a few days.  That’s what the man got paid to do.

They watched as their bags were loaded into the back of a sleek black Limousine, T heading to the front to sit with the driver.  He gave them a wicked grin and mumbled a comment about, “I don’t think I even need to say anything about why I don’t want to sit in the back with you…”

Cassidy, slightly tipsy from that large glass of champagne, let the remark obviously affect her as she dropped her head and slapped her forehead.  

“Let’s get in,” Justin told her, nudging her elbow, trying not to chuckle over the whole thing.

Sliding down in the leather seat, she leaned into him as he took position beside her.  “He’s right.  I can’t get into a Limo without thinking about that.”

Justin felt the grin widening across his lips.  He looked her straight in the eye and brushed a grouping of hair back from her cheek.  “Remarkable things happened because of that.”  Of course he was referring to the conception of their son.

She nodded in agreement.  The twinkle in her chocolaty brown eyes made his smile grow even more, if at all possible.  He could see how gaga she was for him just by the look in her eyes at that moment.  The feeling it gave him could only be described as completely awesome… because he felt exactly the same way and it was so obvious.  “Remarkable things are going to happen this weekend,” she said after a short pause.

He chuckled.  “Really?  Is there something you need to tell me?”

Her expression switched to confusion.  Obviously they hadn’t been exactly on the same page as far as what he meant by remarkable. 

“I was talking about Cody.  He was the remarkable thing that happened because of that Limo ride.”

“Oh…” The look of realization covered all her features, then immediately turned into a grin.  “I didn’t mean remarkable like that,” she giggled.  Then she leaned in close to his ear.  “I was talking about all the sex we’re going to have.”

He slipped his hand to her denim-clad legs, almost between her thighs.  “I kind of thought that’s what you meant,” he replied, as the warmth of her lips pressed to his neck, just behind his ear.  “I have something planned when we get to the resort,” he said, fully enjoying her mouth against his skin. 

Her arms curled around him as she hugged into his side and nuzzled her face into his neck even more.  “Have I told you how in love I am with you?” she said, in the sappiest voice he’d ever heard come out of her.

“I don’t think you have,” he answered playfully, his hand moving from between her legs, to her outer thigh and around to her butt, as she was completely leaned into him.

“Well, that’s my goal this weekend, to show you, because I don’t think there are any words that would even begin to describe it.” 

He liked what she was saying—a lot.  “That was kind of my plan too,” he told her.  Her eyes met his and he instinctively pressed a tender kiss to her lips. 

It was at that moment that T popped his head through the open Limo door.  “We’re leaving now,” he said, and then grunted with disgust at the act of love he’d witnessed.  The door slammed immediately after. 

Justin chuckled.  “He’s really happy for me, I swear.”

Cassidy didn’t answer; she was too busy putting her lips to his—and that was just fine by Justin.

The pampering started as soon as they arrived at the Esperanza Resort.  Their Ocean View Luxury Suite was set up with a delicious spread of food—catered lunch of grilled seafood and vegetables prepared special by one of the master chefs.  They got settled quickly and sat down to eat, which was great because Cassidy was starving, all the while she could not get over the view.  Every which way she looked was nothing but gorgeous blue ocean, never ending.  She’d got a quick glance at the terrace in the master bedroom and she was already thinking of how peaceful it would be to sit out there with her morning coffee, no worries of nasty “photogs” anywhere to be found.  Then of course there was the private infinity pool and spa—a late night skinny dip sounded extremely intriguing.  The possibilities were endless!

The luggage arrived while they ate, and once they were finished Cassidy took the opportunity to unpack a few things while Justin called to check on Cody.  He was also checking emails on his Blackberry, something that was new to him, but she realized it was a necessity with all that was going on in their lives.

She was hanging up this sexy little number she’d brought to wear to dinner one night when he stepped up behind her, wrapping both arms around her waist.  His lips touched the top of her shoulder, her skin exposed thanks to the wide-necked shirt she was wearing.  “Everything’s fine on the home front,” he told her.

“Good.”  Instantly she turned in his arms, but he was looking behind her. 

“What’cha got hanging up in here?” His arms were sorting through the clothes behind her with curiosity.  “Any sexy lingerie?”

“Maybe,” she grinned slyly.

His focus returned to her face, as he gently placed both hands to her cheeks and pressed his lips to hers lovingly.  “God, I love you.” It came out as more of a breath than words.

Cassidy smiled, kissing him again.  “I don’t think we’ve ever said it so much as we have today.”

Justin was grinning too.  “I know.  I like it.”

She giggled.  “Me too,” and indulged in his tender lips one more time.  “So what were your mom and Cody doing when you called?”

“Finger painting in the kitchen and she said don’t worry they’re being careful not to get it on anything.”

“I’m not worried,” Cassidy replied.  “I trust your mom.  The only thing I am worried about is the transition from your mom watching him to my parents.”

“I’m sorry,” Justin was immediately telling her.  “My mom would have stayed with him the whole time but she has to fly home tomorrow night.”

“Oh, I know,” Cassidy said, still enjoying the warmth of his arms looped around her waist.  His hands rested just at the top of her butt.  Her position with him mimicked the same, her chest pressed against the top of his abdomen, mainly because he was wearing shoes and she wasn’t.  “I’m only worried because of security issues.”

Justin smoothed a hand to the top of her head.  “I assure you, Dre and his team will make sure that our boy is safe, and your parents too, as far as that goes.”

Grinning again, she was ready to change the subject.  “So what did you have planned next?  You said you had something planned when we were on the plane, or were you just talking about lunch?”

“Oh no… There’s lots more in store for you, sweetheart,” he spoke devilishly, raising his brow for affect.

“Right now?  Or later?”

That wicked grin still eased across his lips, he brushed a thumb over the top of her cheek.  “Right now I think you need to go put on one of those skimpy bikinis I asked you to pack and soak up some of that sun out by the pool because we have exactly one hour and forty-five minutes before our appointment shows up.”

“Appointment?” she asked curiously.

He nodded.  “Trust me.  It’s good.”

“Ok.”  She slipped out of his hold and turned back to her suitcase, reached in the compartment with the half-dozen bikinis she’d packed, pulled one out and disappeared into the bathroom.

When Cassidy emerged about five minutes later with the tiniest black string bikini she owned, Justin was talking on the phone.  She tried not to chuckle as his eyes caught sight of her and he brought a fist to his mouth, mock biting himself.  Cassidy strutted past and went straight into the pool.  The water was perfect.  Not too cold, not too warm.

Justin rushed to end his call without sounding obvious, but he needed to throw on his swim shorts and get out there with her immediately!  Damn!  He’d never got out of his clothes so quickly—well, maybe he had, but he was definitely rushing.  He threw on the first pair of trunks he could find—a long blue pair that tended to slip a little down his hips once they were wet—and stepped out back.

He sucked in a deep breath as he stepped into the pool; she was at the edge of the infinity wall, staring out at the amazing view.  Swimming up behind her, he landed at her back, both of his arms finding the partition to grab hold of on either side of her.  Nudging his face in beside her wet hair, he pressed a wet kiss to the side of her neck.

“This is nice,” she said with a bit of sigh.

“It is,” he agreed, “especially with you being a part of it.”

She craned her neck to look back at him.  “You sure got out here quick.  Weren’t you just on the phone?”

“I’m a master at being quick.”  As soon as he realized what he’d said, he decided that he didn’t like the connotation of it.  “When I need to be… that is.”

Cassidy chuckled.  “I’m gonna do a few laps and then go lay on the lounge.”

He nodded and let her free.  Then he swam over to the side of the pool, took a seat and watched her gracefully swim back and forth, back and forth, back and forth.  The gracefulness of her strokes reminded him of what an athlete she was.  It also reminded him that they needed to spend more time doing those things that they both enjoyed instead of hiding behind closed doors to avoid shutter bugs. 

He shook all serious thoughts away as she came towards him.  Not the right time for that.  His eyes were stuck to her as she stepped out—water dripping down her sexy frame like ice melting from a fire—and grabbed one of the oversized fluffy white towels.  “You want something to drink?” he decided to ask, taking in a deep breath.

Cassidy nodded, wiping her face with the towel.  Standing, Justin strutted over to the outside mini fridge and grabbed a Diet Pepsi for her and a regular for himself.  Then he took seat on the lounge beside her and opened the diet before handing it off to her.  Smiling Cassidy took a sip and leaned back into the cushy chair.

Justin did the same, soaking in the surroundings.  He was realizing that even though they were outside, the way this particular part of the patio was set up was extremely private.  First of all, it dropped down lower than the pool, they’d climbed three steps to get to it when they’d come out of the suite.  On the right the patio continued to the master terrace where there was a table and chairs, but just beyond that was a complete wall obstructing any view from that side.  In front of them was a partial wall, with nothing but blue ocean and sky beyond them.  There was a private beach several stories below, but even if there had been people on it, there was absolutely no way they’d be able to see in.

They were outside with total privacy and Cassidy was wet in the sexiest bikini he’d ever seen.  Next thing he knew he’d moved from his lounge to hers, climbing right on top of her. 

Cassidy’s eyes popped open with a jolt.  It was always nice to have Justin’s weight against her.  Immediately she grinned, she just couldn’t help it.

“We’re completely alone out here,” he said with a sly smile.

“I know.  Isn’t it nice?”  She could feel where he was going with this—literally. 

With his knees positioned between her legs and his elbows supporting his top weight, he let the lower portion of his body ease into her just a little more.  Cassidy was instantly on fire, as if she hadn’t been waiting for this all day—but she had, totally. 

“This is nice,” he replied and captured her in a breathtaking kiss. 

Bending her knees, she gave him more access and all of his weight sank into her.  All she could think about was having him inside of her right that very second.  “I want you so fucking bad,” she breathed out.

Justin looked at her long enough to show her his grin.  Then he popped a finger inside her bikini top and exposed her in about two seconds flat.  Next thing she knew the warm wetness of his mouth had completely taken her nipple.  The pulse between her legs was off the charts, as she tried her damndest to grind into him, writhing and gyrating her hips.  Unfortunately he wasn’t allowing her that access, not at that particular second anyway. 

“You’re going to let me enjoy you for a little bit first,” he told her, his chin inching down her abdomen.

“Justin, it’s not necessary, really…” She was so out of breath she could hardly speak.

“Yes, it is.”  His lips pressed into her lower stomach, just above her bikini.  Then he grabbed the ties at each of her hips and the little bit of cloth fell completely off of her. 

“Come on,” she said, “please.”

But his only response was a wicked grin just before he teasingly placed a kiss just above her neatly groomed hairline. 

“Oh my fucking god,” she breathed in a whisper.  “Just fuck me now.  Please...” The last word sneaking out much more audible than the others.

This time he barely hummed an “uh uh” as the tip of his tongue smoothed over her for just one brief moment. 

Almost ready to scream and cry thanks to his sensuous torture, his hot breath was on her, his soft lips kissing her, his moist tongue touching every sensitive part of her.  She let him indulge in her for as long as she could stand it, but she was so close and her body craved every thick inch that he had to offer.  “Justin, please…” She was begging again, but she just couldn’t help it. 

Finally, he met her face to face, and immediately she was pushing his shorts down his hips.  With one slick push he completely filled her up.  Her eyes closed as she sucked in a deep breath.  His face was next to her ear.  “Is that what you wanted?” he asked in a sexy whisper.

“Yes.  Fuck yes.”

It didn’t take much more than that.  With each perfectly-timed thrust the pulse grew stronger until the sensation overwhelmed her with satisfaction.  All the while Justin was breathing heavy and whispering sexy words in her ear.  She realized quickly that he was coming with her and it only made release that much sweeter. 

When he finally collapsed against her, they were both breathing heavy and starting to sweat.  The realization of them being outside soaked through her haze of post-orgasm.  Luckily the satisfaction outweighed the concern.  Besides, there exact location was extremely secluded.  It’d be nearly impossible for anyone to see.  Anyway, no one knew where they were, so they had to be safe.

Justin pressed a moist, hot kiss to the side of her face.  “Let’s go shower,” he said, “before our appointment gets here.”

A quiet smirk escaped her, the curiosity of the “appointment” still weighing heavily.  “Okay,” she told him. 

Carefully he rose up, pulling his shorts up as he did so.  An image of pictures of his naked ass splattered across a dozen tabloids fluttered through her mind.  “I hope we’re alone out here as much as you think we are,” she said, realizing it would be way too difficult trying to refasten her bathing suit and instead grabbed a nearby towel to cover all of her exposed parts, which was basically all of her.

Facing the gorgeous backdrop of white sand and sea, he braced his hands against the wall and looked over.  “There are two people lying on the beach,” he said, “and there is absolutely no way they could have seen in here.”

She was nodding, even though he wasn’t looking at her. 

“What about boats?” she said. “And telescopic lenses?”

Turning towards her, he shot her a tender smile, his sparkling blue eyes still dancing with desire.  “You make me do things I wouldn’t normally do,” he admitted, instead of addressing her concerns.  He touched her bare shoulder, trailing his index finger down to the top of her arm.  “You make all inhibitions fly out the window.”

Grinning, Cassidy pressed her palm to his cheek, feeling the slight bit of stubble that adorned it.  “I like that,” she said quietly.

He grabbed her then, locking both arms around her waist and bringing her toweled body up against his.  “I want to spend the rest of my life with you.”

Tenderly, she pressed a kiss to his lips.  “Are you sure that’s not just the great sex talking?”

“It’s not that and you know it.  Don’t make light of this.  I’m being serious.”

She instantly felt bad.  “I’m sorry.  I wasn’t trying to make light, and I’m not afraid of all these things that were feeling for each other.  Being with you is amazing and the last thing I want is to do anything that might jeopardize that.”

With a sexy half grin, he kissed her softly, just against the corner of her mouth.  “Marry me.”  It wasn’t posed as a question.  It was an urge, a request. 

She honestly did not know how she was supposed to respond.  “Are you seriously proposing to me right now?”

“Yes.”

Her voice lowered to a whisper.  “I thought we were taking things slow?”

“Are we though?”  His voice was no where near whispering.  “We keep saying that, but look at how our lives have changed over the past two months.  We’ve spent nearly every minute together and I don’t want that to stop.  Do you?”

Cassidy shook her head no.  “I love being with you.”

“Then why not?” he asked.

“Because… we are both newly divorced.  Because… what will our friends and our family say?  What will the media say?  They’ll massacre us.”

“Cassidy...  Who the fuck cares?  Seriously.”

She’d never seen him like this.  He’d made his little comments here and there, and she’d always thought he hadn’t even realized when he’d said them, but maybe she was wrong.  Maybe he was completely aware all along of how strongly he felt and what his intentions were.  It was crazy, and the whole thing caused this big ball of electricity to spin inside of her chest.  It wasn’t a bad feeling.  It wasn’t nerves.  It wasn’t apprehension.  She knew in the deepest part of her soul that Justin was the one.  It was her rationalism that made her hesitate. 

“Justin, I’ve never felt so sure about anything in my life as I do about being with you.”

He knew there was more.  “And?”

“And?” she repeated.  “I want to be with you forever, I do,”

“I hear the “but” coming.”    The look on his face already showed disappointment and that was the last thing she was trying to do. 

“I’m scared to get married again,” she said in a whisper.  It was a hard thing to admit, but it was the truth.  “I don’t think I’m ready yet.  I don’t want it to ruin what we have.”  She didn’t want to hurt him.  The feeling was so intense that it was making her eyes burn.  She hated crying, but she could feel the tears building up and it was impossible to stop.

“Sweetheart, it’s okay,” his voice turned tender and soft.  “I’m sorry for pressuring you.  I said I wouldn’t do that.  I just get so anxious.  I just feel so amazing when I’m with you.  I want to wake up with you everyday.  I want to go to sleep with you every night.  I love talking to you about all the shit I have to deal with.  I feel like you actually listen and understand and care—a lot.  I mean, the list goes on forever.”  With his thumb he brushed the tears from her cheek.

“We can have all that.  I want all that too.”

Wiping away the rest of her tears, he said, “Come on, let’s go inside and take that shower.”  She nodded in agreement, took his hand and let him guide her into their suite, feeling completely submissive and vulnerable—and for possibly the first time in her life, not feeling upset about that fact in the slightest bit.  She didn’t have a hard time expressing her deepest feelings with him and that, she realized, was a very good thing.

© BrandyRae 2008

Part II: Chapter 27

The appointment turned out to be in-room massages.  As soon as the spa team had walked in their suite she was instantly taken back to a time five years before when he’d brought it up and then she’d mentioned how she’d never actually had a professional massage.  That fact had long changed, now she’d had many.  Actually, her first had been prenatal.  Probably because he’d been in her thoughts so much when she was pregnant with Cody, for obvious reasons.

Funny, five years later and he’d just spontaneously proposed on the balcony not two hours earlier.  Even more ironic? Instead of freaking out like she should have—coming out of such a horrendous marriage—she had been completely honest with him and now she felt light as a feather.  Just perfect.

It was so strange…

She just felt oddly at peace with all the craziness in her life.

As much as Justin liked to jump the gun a little bit, she was learning that it was just his personality and she was totally okay with that.  He was easy to reel back in.  And he got her.  Not too many did.  It was awesome.

By the time their therapeutic treatments were finished, they were both thoroughly relaxed.  In a fluffy white bathrobe, Cassidy climbed on top of the giant white linen bed and sunk into it, feeling like a nap might be a good idea.  When Justin appeared moments later, adorned in a robe very much like her own, he climbed up with her—on top of her.  She was instantly finagling the belt that held his robe together.

Smiling, his mouth pressed into hers.  “How you feeling?” he asked with a hum.

“I feel good.”  His robe untied, she smoothed both hands inside the fluffy cotton and around his back, the robe falling around her like a blanket.  He wasn't completely naked underneath, just a pair of black boxer-briefs.  His warmth was more soothing than any blanket or covering.

Letting out a deep sigh, he allowed his weight to sink into her and nestled his face into the crook of her neck.  It was a full-body hug; and it was pure heaven.

Her smile must have spanned from one ear to the other.  It all just felt so amazing.  Everything that involved him felt amazing.  

The warmth of his breath tickled the side of her neck just before his smooth lips pressed into her.  “I love being here with you.”  He was humming again.  It was the most pleasing hum she'd ever heard in her life.

She was humming in reply before her words left her lips.  “Me too.”

“Should we stay in for dinner or go out?” he asked, and then pressed a kiss against her jaw.  

“Stay in,” she answered with absolutely no hesitation.  

Justin shifted to her side, one leg and and one arm still tangled over her and his robe still partially covering her.  It was a bit warm, but she didn't care.  Cassidy hadn't felt this relaxed in longer than she could remember, possibly ever.  When Justin's lips pressed into her jawline one more time, his breathing calm, she knew he was on the verge of sleep.  Bringing a hand to his head, she traced her fingers through his recently cut hair then listened as he hummed with content again.  She felt it in his chest and couldn't help but think of how there was no other place on Earth she'd rather be at that moment.  Then she closed her eyes, and moments later, drifted off to sleep.

Cassidy woke to the spatter of rain hitting the deck outside.  They had left the balcony doors open and she could smell the moisture in the air.  It was dark and Justin was tangled up against her.  The robes had been kicked off, as well as the sheets, but the body heat was making her sweat.  She had to get up.

Carefully she maneuvered her body out from under the grip he had on her—both an arm and a leg strung over her—grabbed a white t-shirt off the back of a chair, and quietly stepped outside.  It was a beautiful night, even with the tiny droplets of rain falling from the sky.  It wasn't cold, maybe 65 degrees.  The view was even more amazing at night then it had been in the daytime.  The moon was in full view, not blocked by the scattered clouds.  She could see for miles.  

In her bare feet, she moved across the concrete deck and stuck a toe in the infinity pool.  The water was perfect, and too inviting to ignore.  Without hesitation, she tore off what little clothes she came out in and submerged herself completely.  Then she made way to the edge like she had earlier in the day.  A view like this could never get old—just sand and ocean and sky.  She'd needed this trip.  She'd needed it bad.  

The fact that Justin knew how much she needed it without her saying a word amazed her.  The fact that he'd just whisked her away all on his own accord, it only solidified to her how truly amazing he was and how lucky she was to have found him after all these years.  Life had been so busy she hardly had time to stop and think about everything, but when she did she couldn't help but be thankful.  Seeing Justin at the game, just barely two months earlier, was the best gift anyone had ever given her.  She felt like finally things were going her way after all the shit she'd gone through over the last few years.

He'd told her that he'd never stopped thinking about her during the past 5 years.  When she really stopped and let herself admit it, she had never stopped thinking about him either.  And it hadn't just been the sex or how good he had made her feel physically. Justin had done something no other man had ever done to Cassidy.  He'd been supportive in a very non judgemental way when he didn't even know her.  He'd left a mark on her and it was something that her mind would go back to often, especially when things had been bad.  

But she'd never forgotten the amazing way he'd touched her.  And not just how it had felt, but how he'd made her feel.  It was a connection, even way back then. She couldn't deny it.  Not knowing all she knew now.  For some reason her mind wandered to her defunct marriage with Jason Brown.  Hindsight was so enlightening.  She remembered the dissapointment she'd had the first time they'd been intimate.  It was funny to think back on it.  In her head, she'd compared him to Justin and he'd come nowhere close to satisfying her in that way.  Her grin was wide as she thought about how lucky she was and how happy Justin made her.  A buzz of emotion filled her inside.  It was like her glass was completely full for once, almost ready to spill over—and that was a fantastic feeling.

Inevitably her mind settled on the accounts of earlier that day and his spontaneous marriage proposal. She did want to marry him, with all her heart, but she was nowhere near ready.  He'd understood and that had meant more to her then she could ever express.  

This is what a real, healthy relationship felt like.  It felt amazing.  She must have been the luckiest girl on the planet to have found something so perfect and true.  She couldn't stand to be away from him one minute more.  She hopped out of the pool, striding naked across the deck until she came to the cabinet with fresh towels, and hurried back inside.  Cassidy couldn't get back to him fast enough.  She just wanted to touch him and be close to his warmth—his love.  It was magnetic, the desire she felt to be close to him right at that very second.  She couldn't fight it even if she wanted to.

Justin watched Cassie step inside from the back patio.  Her hair was wet and she was wrapped in a fluffy hotel towel.  He'd opened his eyes only seconds before, his subconscious becoming aware that he was alone, bringing him to just moments before he saw her returning to him.  She really was a sight.  One he could never get enough of.

"What were you doing, baby girl?" His voice was groggy and came out much more hoarse than he expected.  He cleared his throat as she dropped her towel and slid onto the bed next to him.  Immediately he was sucking in a deep breath at the sight of her slender but curvaceous frame.

"I was hot," she answered, bringing a hand to his forehead and smoothing it up his head.  "I decided to go for a quick skinny dip."

"Damn, I missed that?" That was so not fair.

She giggled softly and whispered "sorry" before pressing her lips to his cheek.  Immediately he was curling his arms around her. He just couldn't have her close enough.  "Thank you so much for bringing me here."  Her cheek was pressed into his chest and words came out a little muffled.  He realized he should probably give her a little room to breath and lessened his hold just enough to do that.  Her chin raised and she looked up at him as best she could.  "This is amazing.  You're amazing.  I love you more than I could ever say.  You have no idea how deeply I feel for you."

Cassidy's words meant so much.  To hear her speak such honest truths, with such emotion behind them, it made his heart swell.  He couldn't help it, he was crushing her with his arms again.  He just couldn't hold her tight enough.  Tenderly he pressed his lips into the top of her head.  "You are the best thing that's ever happened to me," he told her, the meaning coming from the deepest part of his soul and then some.  "I will do everything in my power to make you happy for as long as you will have me.  I mean that with everything that I have, baby. I've never felt like this with anyone.  Ever."  And that was the god's honest truth.

After a glorious twelve-plus hours of sleep, the couple woke feeling refreshed and recharged.  Justin had breakfast delivered to the room where they ate on the patio out by the pool.  The bit of rain from the night before was gone and the morning was absolutetly gorgeous.  They truly were in a beachside paradise.  Cassidy was in Heaven.  She didn't even find herself worrying about Cody.  She'd talked to him first thing and he was having a blast with Grandma Lynn.  They'd make the switch later, Justin's parents to hers, but Cassidy was so comfortable and content she wasn't even worried about that.  She had faith in Justin's team. They would not let any harm come to that precious little boy.

It felt amazing to have such confidence in the people around her.  It had been a very long time since she'd had so many great people in her life.  She just couldn't stop thinking about how happy she was.

And the happiness didn't stop as Justin surprised her after breakfast, all of their golf equipment "spontaneously" arriving.  Matt had shipped everything to the resort so they could play.  Cassidy was beyond excited!  

That feeling of contentment and consuming happiness continued fully throughout the day, including an amazing round of golf—she played fantastic considering she hadn't played in awhile.  Cassidy knew Justin was impressed with her skills, to the point that their playful competitiveness turned into real competitiveness.  She found this side of him completely irresistible—and she couldn't stop thinking about how someone she'd have thought would have nothing in common with her, had everything in common with her.

They were laughing as they made way into the clubhouse at Puerto Los Cabos after the round was over.  It was a gorgeous day and the lounge had an amazing view. Justin pulled out a seat for Cassidy at the bar and then sat down beside her.  T took place on the opposite side of Cassidy. He had been razzing Justin about Cassidy being the better golfer of the two.  That wasn't exactly true, but it did great things for Cassidy's ego.  Funny how much she felt like she'd bonded with Justin's security after all they'd been through recently.  She appreciated how much T did not hold any judgements based on how she and Justin had originally met.  

After ordering cold drinks and a couple of appetizers, Cassidy let out a long sigh of contentment.  "This has been the perfect day," she voiced, sort of sing-songy, her eyes locked on the wall of spotless glass windows overlooking the course and the backdrop of the beautiful blue ocean.  

She felt Justin's hand brush her back between her shoulder blades.  "I couldn't agree more."  He was grinning when her eyes finally caught his.  She thought about leaning in for a kiss but decided to spare Dre from the PDA.  They'd have plenty of time for that later.  "I'm starving."

"Me too," Cassidy agreed. It was about four o'clock in the afternoon, almost time for "the switch" back home.  Justin had his Blackberry sitting on the bar, waiting for confirmation that everything had gone well.

"We're having a nice dinner tonight so make sure you save some of your appetite," he told her.

"Where are you taking me?" she immediately asked.

"Somewhere amazing," was all he replied.

"Everywhere you take me is amazing," Cassidy smirked, a breadth of suggestion in her tone.

"Oh geez..." T remarked.  She imagined there had been an eye roll along with it.

Cassidy turned to the hefty man and patted his massive forearm.  "Sorry," she grinned.  Justin was chuckling on the other side of her.

It was at that moment that deep voices entered the room behind her.  Cassidy found herself looking automatically, worried it could be someone to cause a fuss.  She learned instantly that it was exactly the opposite as in walked basketball great Michael Jordan and a highly respected producer from ESPN that she had actually worked with when she'd been with the network.  A rush of excitement hit her like a wrecking ball straight to the chest.  She about nearly fell of her barstool, but somehow managed to contain herself.  Outside she was playing it cool, but on the inside fireworks were exploding!

Discreetly she reached over, gripping Justin's knee and squeezing, probably a little too hard as he was quickly prying her death grip off his leg.  The two very powerful men were heading straight for them, Cassidy was already smiling with acknowledgment, reminding herself not to get too excited.  This could open the door for her that she needed so badly.  The right conversation could land her with a job.  It was time to network.  She had to do this right.

Watching Cassidy schmooze was like watching the mechanics of a well oiled machine.  Both men were eating it up.  Of course he'd met Mike before; they'd played golf at numerous celebrity tournaments together and he'd caught him at different social events.  Justin couldn't recall meeting the big wig producer, Jim Benson, but that didn't mean he hadn't.  It didn't matter, they were absorbed with Cassidy, reminiscing about a time when she was covering an event and some scandal had erupted backstage.  It was something he'd had no clue about, which apparently was thanks to Cassidy doing such a good job at keeping the focus elsewhere.  

It was obvious that she was highly respected in her field.  She'd come a long way from the camera frightened young woman he'd met five years earlier.

He looked up as Mike was patting his shoulder, laughing, "you hooked a good one," he was telling Justin.

"I did," Justin agreed, proud and confident.  

"You call me when you're ready to come back to work," Jim was saying to Cassidy.  Justin knew she was just screaming on the inside.  "The door’s open."

"Thank you so much, Jim.  I definitely will."  

The men said goodbyes and headed to a table across the room, just as the bartender was setting appetizers down in front of them.  Justin immediately grabbed a fancy rolled taco and took a bite.  He'd barely started to chew when Cassidy was squeezing his leg again.  Covering the grip she had on him with his own hand, he finished chewing and then leaned into her ear.  "I love you... But calm down.  You need to play this cool."

Then he watched as she visibly sucked in a deep breath, obviously trying to get a grip.  Her brown eyes held the most loving twinkle as she turned her face his direction.  "I love you," she whispered.  "Thank you."  She pressed one sweet kiss to his scruffy cheek and then swiveled on her stool towards the food, grabbing a lettuce wrap and taking a bite.

Just then his Blackberry buzzed against the bar.  The text read "package delivered safe."  Justin sighed with relief and passed the phone to Cassidy so she could read it. Her smile was evident and wide.  Their boy had safely arrived at the Nickel’s.  It seemed like all their cards were finally lined up.  Life was good... no better than that.  Life was great.  He couldn't have asked for things to go any better.

When they climbed into the car less than an hour later, Cassidy was still high with excitement.  She hadn't realized how much she missed working until presented with an opportunity to work. Before it had just seemed like it would have been too difficult, but with all the emotional support she had at around her now, it seemed more than possible!  Somehow, she was doing a good job at keeping all the craziness to herself.  She'd shown enough excitement already.  

Justin was sitting next to her, scrolling through emails on his Blackberry. He caught her attention when he made a "hmmmm" sound out of nowhere.

"What?" she asked.

"We need to decide if we want to do the family interview."

"Oh..." Cassidy remarked.  This again.

If it was going to help things calm down, she was ok with it.  She just wasn't sure if that would be the case.

"When do we need to give them an answer?"  she asked.

"Try yesterday."

Automatically she grimaced.  "You decide.  It's your call."  It was too big of a decision.  She couldn't do it.

With a quiet smirk, Justin remarked, "I think I need to talk to my manager on this one."

"Your manager?"

"Mom," he clarified, that handsome Timberlake grin smoothing across his face.

Cassidy was fine with that.  "Good idea."

Next thing she knew his phone was dialing and he had it on speaker.  Lynn Harless answered after just two rings, but she didn't bother with hello.  "We dropped him an hour ago.  Everything went fine.  He was wonderful...perfect angel."

Cassidy couldn't help but smile at that.  She noticed Justin was smiling too as he stared down at the dark gray device in his hand.

"I'm so glad, but I'm calling for other reasons."

"Oh," she replied.  "What's up?  You guys ok?"

"Fantastic," Justin answered enthusiastically.  "...you're on speaker by the way."

"Hi Cassidy," Lynn quickly greeted her.

"Hi Lynn."

"So why are you calling me when you should be enjoying your time alone together?"

"Well, as my manager, and my mother, I wanted to know your feelings on us doing the thing with NBC."

"Ohhhh....." Lynn drew it out.  "Is Jeff bothering you because I told him to wait until you returned."

"Just email," Justin responded.

"Well, to be honest son, if we must discuss this right now... I really feel like you and Cassidy need to follow your instincts on this one and go with your gut.  You know, you were 11 years old when you did Star Search.  Obviously very different, but Cody is only 4 and a half.  If you want to put him on TV you need to be really sure about it first."

Lynn's words rang very true to what Cassidy was feeling, but at the same time Cassidy had no idea that Justin had been on Star Search at age 11.  She really needed to see that!

"You're so right, mom.  Thank you."

"No problem, baby," she replied in her southern drawl.  "Now go relax and stop thinking about work stuff."

He smirked.  "Yes ma'am."

"Love you."

"Love you too," he responded with sincerity and ended the call.  Then he looked straight at Cassidy.  "She has a good point."

Cassidy nodded in agreement.  "She does.  You were on Star Search?"  There was absolutely no pause between her two sentences.

Justin's eyes instantly widened.  "Why yes I was..."

"Oh, you need to see that," T's deep voice piped up from the front.  "He was a cute little thing."

Cassidy was laughing out loud at that.  "I really do need to see that," she agreed.

Quietly Justin whispered, "don't worry, I have it at home if you really want to."

"We should let Cody watch it," she thought out loud.  She couldn't believe she hadn't thought of it before.  "He needs to really see what you do."

"Maybe we could show him things more recent," Justin suggested.

"I don't know," Cassidy immediately countered.  "Some of your more recent stuff is a bit suggestive... might be better for him to see you perform as a kid.  Besides, he could see how much he looks like you."

"He's not even 5," Justin remarked.  "You really think he'll care?  I mean, it's not dinosaurs or Tarzan or basketball."

Cassidy leaned in and pressed a warm kiss to his lips.  "He adores you.  He'll love seeing what his daddy does."

"Awww...." Justin sounded sappily.  Then he looked her straight in the eye.  "I can't wait to show him."

(c) BrandyRae 2013                                                                                                                                                     

Part II: Chapter 28

The rest of their time in Cabo flew by.  It had been absolutely perfect and the bond she shared with Justin had only grown stronger after spending three amazing days alone with him.  Well, almost alone... if you didn’t count T who had been there to look after them.  He’d done his best at staying in the background when they were out.  Considering they did end up running into fans -twice at dinner and once at the beach—it was good to have had him there.

Now eight days later, Cassidy watched through the wide open doorway as a crew from People magazine set up equipment in Justin’s formal living room.  She could hear Cody buzzing behind her in the hallway.  Matt and Lynn were doing their best to keep him occupied and out of the way, but he was super excited about all the changes in their life.  Who knew he’d be so open to the extra attention.  Clearly, he got that part of his personality from his father.  It made Cassidy smile just thinking about it.  More and more of Justin’s personality traits were becoming evident in their son.   Actually, she realized that a lot of them were there before, she just hadn’t known Justin well enough before to realize it.

Two days after they’d got home from their mini retreat they’d sat down as a family—with a big bowl of popcorn in Justin’s home theater—and watched some old videos of Justin performing as a kid.  Things had really clicked for Cody after that.  He was awed and enamored—and watching Justin’s facial expressions throughout the whole thing had been priceless.  Since then Cody had been fully attentive over everything Justin had to do work related.  Cassidy found it both intriguing and weird.  Her little boy had never paid much attention to entertainers before, but this had lit a whole new fire underneath him.  She was curious as to how far or long it would go.

Deep in thought, she jumped a little when Justin came up beside her and put a hand on her shoulder.  “You ok?” he asked quietly.  

She nodded.  She was.  It was a bit overwhelming, but she could handle it.  Plus she was glad that it was just a magazine shoot and not a TV shoot.  Piece of cake.

“They’re almost ready,” he continued.  “Wardrobe is ready to dress Cody.”

Now that felt a little weird.  “Ok,” she finally spoke.  “I’m coming.”

She followed him into one of the large guest suites where wardrobe and makeup had set up earlier.  She'd been there earlier for her own hair and makeup, now she watched as clothes were laid out for her son.  Cody came in with Lynn, still bouncing off the walls a bit.  "Which outfit do you like?" Cassidy immediately asked him.  She liked for him to have a say in that kind of stuff.

And he definitely had an opinion, picking out a pair of dark jeans and a blue, white and yellow shirt.  It wasn't Cassidy's first choice, but she was going to let him have this one.  "I like this one," Justin spoke up, picking out a different shirt—pale blue—and more kid looking jeans.  She liked that choice better too.  Her eyes caught Justin's and he winked.  

"Oh, me too!" Cody quickly changed his mind. How nice it was to not be a single parent anymore.  And it had become more than apparent how much influence Justin had over Cody.  Now that things were settling between them all, co-parenting had become much more seamless and effortless.  It had become natural.  She couldn't place when exactly things had clicked, they just had.  

Twenty minutes later they all situated themselves in front of the photographer in the open-spaced living room where the crew had set up.  He placed them first on Justin's white couch, mock reading with Cody.  Next it was playing with a Lego set, then drawing, sharing a laugh, and various different poses with the three of them together.  Then several shots of Justin and Cody together without Cassidy.  When they got up, the three of them moved out of the room and Justin lifted Cody onto his back, carrying him outside, where the photographers followed and more pictures were snapped, this time on the basketball court.  Lynn even got in on the action a bit.

It was all a bit surreal.  Cassidy had been on TV, but she had never really been in a full-fledged photo shoot.  Considering this one was uber personal took it to a whole nother level.  She tried her best to be as real as possible.  What she couldn’t hide or deny was all of the love and adoration she felt whenever she watched Justin and Cody together.  To her, that was the best gift.  Seeing those two sharing so much had become the light of her life.  If she let herself get too caught up she’d become instantly emotional.  That was the last thing she wanted when the cameras were on her.  It was one thing to be real, it was another to be overly sentimental.

It was after five p.m. when everything was said and done.  Cody had missed his afternoon snack and he was making his hunger known to everyone.  “You want me to go pick something up?” Matt asked.  Cassidy had just returned downstairs after washing her face and changing back into her regular clothes.  

“Yeah, could you?” Justin piped in.

“Why don’t we just go get something?” Cassidy suggested.  She was getting tired of avoiding such typical things.  

“Babe...” Justin looked her way with sensitive eyes.  “We should probably let the photos hit before we start making public appearances.”

“I guess it does kind of defeat the purpose, huh?” she asked, feeling slightly defeated.

“It does,” he said, stepping close to her and wrapping his arms around her waist.  Lovingly he pressed his lips to her temple.

"I'll go pick something up.  You guys just relax," Matt stated.  Cassidy was feeling more and more like he was a godsend.  He way surprassed his duties as simply an assistant.

"Thanks Matt.  We really appreciate it," Justin was saying, one arm wrapped against Cassidy's waist, his side against her side.  

"Mommy, can we go swimming in Daddy's pool?" Cody asked out of the blue.

"I think that is a great idea."  It was Justin who answered the question, before Cassidy could even think it through.  

"Is it warm?" Cassidy asked, it was November after all.

"Of course," he remarked, as if she was silly to ask otherwise.

"Yay!" Cody jumped excitedly where he was standing next to Matt.  

"Go up to your room sweetie," Cassidy stepped close to her little boy and ruffled his blond head.  "I'll be up in a minute to help you get changed."

He answered with a happy "K!" and shot out of the room like a bullet.  Cassidy was immediately yelling for him to slow down.

Taking in a deep breath, she turned to Matt.  "Mexican food.... with a margarita."

Justin laughed.  "Just get the food," he told Matt.  "I'll take care of the margaritas."

Forty-five minutes later when Matt returned with the food Cassidy was sitting on the edge of the pool watching her son and his father splash and play—Cody giggling for the past 5 minutes straight at least—while sipping on that much needed margarita.  The sun had set and the wind had picked up, so they got out of the heated pool and headed toward the outdoor dining area.  Justin was quick to turn on the heaters while Cassidy got Cody settled in front of his food.

It was a quiet and relaxing meal with just the three of them.  Sure, there were people inside the house still bustling from the activity of the day, but it felt like they were miles away and Cassidy realized how much she wanted this life for her and her son—and that she wanted it for good.  

Lynn came out just as Cody was finishing up.  "Mind if I help Cody with his bath and get him ready for bed since I'm leaving tomorrow."

Justin automatically deflected the question, his eyes fixating on Cassidy for a response.

"Sounds like a great idea," she smiled.

Cody happily hopped up to go with Grandma Lynn.  

"Hey, can Daddy and I get hugs and kisses goodnight please?"

The curly blond headed boy spun in his tracks, running to his mom first, arms open for a big hug. Then he turned to Justin, and did the same for his Daddy.  "Night kiddo," Justin called out right before Cody disappeared inside the house with Lynn.

Emotion was weighing heavily on Cassidy’s heart as she twisted in her chair to gaze at the man who had suddenly become her whole world.  The feeling overwhelmed her, but it didn’t scare her.  She realized more and more that she wanted this.  This was the life she’d envisioned with her first marriage, but it had never even came close to what she’d experienced with Justin in less two months time.  

“So, we need to talk about my schedule.”  He grasped her hand, and she was knocked out of her fuzzy haze.  “Because it’s about to get really busy,” he continued.

“Ok.”  She had known that, overhearing who knew how many conversations about all he had coming up, but the fact that he felt the need to have an actual conversation about it concerned her for a minute.  He wasn’t feeling like her and Cody in his life would be too much when he was really working, was he?

Thankfully he smiled, that one hundred percent charming yet sincere Timberlake grin, and the knot in her stomach loosened.  “Don’t look at me like that,” he said, still smiling.  “It’s not bad.”

“Oh.”  She sighed maybe louder than she wanted to.  

He chuckled, deep and kind of silly-like, but somehow absolutely sexy at the same time, and she felt like she was completely losing her head.  

“So first thing, I’d like to add a nanny to my staff… to help with Cody.”  Cassidy opened her mouth, but he kept talking.  “You’re an amazing mother.  This has nothing to do with that.  I just know how things are about to change and having someone to help with Cody will be a godsend.  Trust me.”

“Ok…” she drew out the word, sensing there was more coming.

“The other thing, well… and there’s no pressure, but I’d really love it if you and Cody settled in here with me.   I mean, I’m not asking you to sell your place or anything, but now that I have Cody’s room all set up and he is obviously comfortable here— and with the press about to hit, I’d feel more secure if we spent most of our time here.

She opened her mouth again, but he didn’t let her speak.

“I love my house, but I’ve realized over the past few days that I really love it with you and Cody in it.  I know I pressured you in Cabo.  I don’t want to do that, but I do want you to know how I feel.”

Cassidy finally let a grin ease over her lips.  “I don’t want to leave,” she spoke softly, getting caught in the gentle gaze of his dark gray-blue eyes.  “I love being here with you.  I really just love being anywhere with you.”  He smiled wide at that.  Cassidy continued, “Let’s do it.”

“Yeah?” he asked

She nodded, “Yeah.”

“That makes me really happy.”

“You make me really happy,” she countered with a sappy grin.

His smile spread up to his eyes as he leaned over and pressed his soft lips into hers.  The touch of his fingertips tickled her jawline as his mouth lingered over hers both lovingly and sensually.  She couldn’t help but smile against him.  He made her feel amazing.  Her heart felt like it had tripled in size it was so full of love and adornment.

When he finally backed away, she realized he never really talked much about his schedule.  “Is there more?  You said you wanted to talk about your schedule.”

“Mainly that was it.  In my mind I’m trying to figure out how this is going to work best… me being a dad, and a boyfriend—” his grin turned silly when he said boyfriend “—and working a full schedule.  I need to make sure I am fulfilling all these roles because I cannot afford to jeopardize what I have with you or my responsibilities as a father to Cody.”

Cassidy was soothingly rubbing his forearm, like she needed to comfort him now.  “We’ll be fine, Justin.  We understand that your career is very important to you… I understand.”  she hoped she was conveying how sincerely she meant that.  “We can handle this.  I can handle this.”

“It’s gonna be ok,” he said.  “I start with studio time.  The hours are long, but it’s private and quiet as far as press goes.  No craziness.”

“Please don’t worry.  I’m not going to run.”  She had a feeling that’s what he was afraid of.  “I hate to remind you of this, but I was married to an NFL quarterback.  I understand busy schedules.”

He put a hand up and kind of swished it through the air. “I get that,” he said, “but this is SO not like that.  SO, not like that…”  She could tell by the way he was shaking his head that he hated it when she brought that up, but it was hard not to sometimes.

“I’m sure it’s different in many ways, but I just don’t want you to worry.”

Justin switched from shaking to nodding his head.  His tongue peeked out of his mouth as he licked his bottom lip and it affected Cassidy in ways that should not be affecting her during such a serious conversation.  “I’ll try not to,” he said.  “I’ll try my best.”

It was at that moment that Matt poked his head out the back door.  “J, Timb is on the phone.”

“I’ll be right there,” he said to Matt.  “See, baby, it’s starting already.  Are you sure you’re going to be ok with all this?”

“Sweetheart, yes, I promise.  Go talk to him. You’ve been waiting for this call all day.”  

Justin stood, his chair screeching across the concrete as he got up from the table.  Before going inside, he leaned down and pressed one more wet kiss to her mouth.  “I love you,” he said.

“I love you too.  Don’t worry.”

Taking the last sip of her watered down margarita, Cassidy stood and stacked their dirty plates to clear the table, but before she could finish, Rosa, Justin's longtime housekeeper appeared out of nowhere and took over.  Cassidy thanked her and slipped inside Justin's 12,000 square foot estate.

It was an incredible home, in much better taste than her own home thanks to the decorating done by her ex-husband.  She snickered to herself at that thought.  Jason had such terrible style.  And not that she was comparing the two, but it was just one more thing on a list of dozens that she loved about Justin—he had impeccable style, regardless if it was in his home or on his person.  He was just the epitomy of cool.

And the room he had decorated for Cody was amazing—way more amazing then the one at her house.  Cody actually had his own sitting area on one side of the room, with small couch and a rocker.  There was a TV, of course, but also built in bookshelves with every children's book imaginable.  On the other side of the large room was a bed that looked more like a fort.  On the wall was a large hand painted mural of the most friendly looking dinosaur Cassidy had ever seen.  It was truly amazing, and Justin had done it all on his own without any input from Cassidy.  

Cody had been so excited over his "new room" when they'd first seen it, more excited than Christmas morning even, that he'd played in it a whole day straight.  They had to force him down for meals.  That thought reminded Cassidy, Christmas wasn't far, barely a month really.  She wondered how that would all play out.  She was excited to spend the holiday with Justin.  It would be Cody's first Christmas with his daddy.  That warmed her from the inside out, but it also made her realize it was something they probably need to discuss.  Afterall, they'd been so busy that they'd practically missed Thanksgiving.  She didn't want that to happen with Christmas.

The sound of Matt's voice calling out to her from Justin's downstairs study caught Cassidy's attention.  She turned and hovered inside the doorway where the young man was sitting at a desk with a computer, still hard at work.  "You're still here?"  It was after 8 p.m.

"Just finishing up," he said.

"You should ask Justin for a raise," she told him, although she had no idea how much he was paid. "...For all your hard work and dedication."

Matt smiled and responded with a shy "thanks."  Then he got to his point.  "I have a folder for you... nanny resumes."

"Oh."  She hadn't quite expected that already.  "Ok."  She stepped further into the room and took the file he was holding out for her.  "Thanks," she told him.

"No problem."

Heading up the curved staircase, Cassidy carried the folder with her.  She planned on taking a hot shower and then retiring to Justin's big cozy bed.  It was amazingly comfortable.  She understood why he loved his house so much, because she really enjoyed it too.  Once she relaxed she'd start reviewing the resumes.  A glass of wine sounded nice.  Would it be wrong to have wine after a margarita?  She'd ponder that one while in the shower.

Passing by Justin's private office, she heard his loud boisterous laugh even though the door was shut.  He'd talked a lot about his relationship with Timbaland, the music producer that Justin had worked with on most all of his solo stuff.  It was obvious the friendship went much deeper than just work, eventhough Cassidy had yet to meet the man.

It pleased to her know that Justin had such good people around him.  Funny how she cared so deeply for him in such a short time.  It went so deep that she felt extremely protective over him.  She couldn't remember ever feeling that way towards another man, and espcially not her ex husband.  For some odd reason she found herself remembering when they'd met five years ago.  She would have never imagined that things would have turned out the way they did.  Apparently when things are meant to be, they are just meant to be.  

When Justin ended his call with Timb he took the time to read through some emails since he was already sitting at his desk.  He responded to the ones that needed his attention—one being a lengthy response to his cousin Rachel.  She had worked for him for a long time, as his previous assistant, but she'd decided to pursue other avenues when he'd married Maci.  There was no bad blood.  She'd actually become involved with someone herself and moved back home to Tennessee.  But he missed her and he definitely needed to update her on all that had been going on.  

After that he looked at some pictures Trace's wife had sent of the baby.  He really needed to get over there.  Or maybe he'd invite them both over for dinner.  Trace had been so busy learning to be a Dad, Justin hadn't spent much time with him either over the last few weeks.  Kind of funny considering they both suddenly had this huge life change in common.  But he and Trace didn't need to see each other every day to be on the same page.  They were that close.

He felt like his whole life was consumed with his new family, but he wasn't upset about it.  Not in the slightest bit.  In fact, it thrilled him.  He loved having a family, being a dad, and a... boyfriend—  He hated that term. It didn't fit.  Things were way more serious than just that, but he had no idea what else to call them and he didn't want to pressure Cassidy anymore than he already head.  She'd agreed to move in.  The last thing he wanted to do was screw that up.

When he found her a few minutes later she was sitting at the head of his bed, pillows propped behind her, her wet hair twisted into a messy bun on top of her head, and a folder of paperwork in her lap.  The TV was on but the volume was turned down too low to hear it.  He smiled, realizing she was watching the Golf Channel.  It was a replay of an old PGA tournament.  He knew because it was too late for a live airing.  He watched it for a second; Tiger was at the tee, in his customary red shirt and black golf pants.  

He let out a quiet but happy smirk.  Yes, this was the woman he was head over heels in love with.  It was the little things that reminded him how perfect she was for him.

Finally noticing him, she looked up with a goofy grin.  "Matt gave me nanny resumes to look over."

The corner of his lip twitched.  "I asked him before I discussed it with you.  Hope you're not upset about that."  His sight unwavering, he moved closer to the bed.

"No, it's fine.  I kind of like that you took the lead on this."  That surprised him.  Cassidy was so strong and independent.  He never wanted to make her feel like she didn't have a say, because she most certainly did have a say, especially in regard to their son—she was the boss!

She was happy so he decided there was no need to discuss it further.  "Well, on that note..." he stripped his t-shirt over his head, purposely flexing his abdomen as he did so.  "I'm gonna jump in the shower."  

He got the ogling reaction he was hoping for—her eyes roaming over him hungrily—then he headed off toward the master en suite.  

"Hurry back!" she called after him.  

Oh, he planned on it.

© BrandyRae 2013

Part II Chapter 29

“Now how about I be the last voice you hear tonight?  And every other night for the rest of the nights that there are…  And every morning I just wanna see you staring back at me… 'Cause I know that's a good place to start…”

“I know people make promises all the time… Then they turn right around and break them… Then someone cuts your heart open with a knife… Now you're bleeding… Don't you know that I could be that guy to heal it over time… And I won't stop until you believe it… Cause baby you're worth it…”

Cassidy stood there in awe watching Justin in the studio booth behind the glass window.  In front of her, sitting at the controls, were Timbaland and Mike, both she had met just recently.  But today… today was the first time she’d actually visited Justin in the studio and watched him in action.  Cody was perched halfway in a chair beside her, feeling just as awed as she was.  She could tell by the giddy look on his face.  More and more the little boy was learning how special his Daddy truly was.

Cassidy was learning that too.

“So don’t act like it’s a bad thing to fall in love with me… Cause you might fuck around and find your dreams come true with me… Spend all your time and your money just to find out that my love was free… So don’t act like it’s a bad thing to fall in love with me, meeee… It’s not a bad thing to fall in love with me, meee….”

She couldn’t help but wonder if the song was about her as he went into the chorus.  Her heart was swelling inside of her chest, but it was more than that.  She felt proud… proud that he was hers.  And she felt admiration of his incredible talent.  If it was possible to be even more smitten with him, she was.  It seemed like that just kept happening over and over again.

He finally stopped, looking up from the mic and catching her stare.  The grin that eased over his stubbled jaw immediately spread up to his eyes.  It was sincere and heartwarming.  His eyes said it all.

It was at that moment that Timb told him to take a break and a few seconds later he was stepping out of the booth, still smiling at her but heading straight toward their son.  

The other two men in the room started talking while Justin was ruffling Cody’s longer than usual, curly blond hair... something about the next take.  Cassidy could hardly concentrate on it, she was too consumed in the overwhelming rush of emotion that had surged upon her watching firsthand the charisma and talent that is Justin Timberlake.  

It really didn’t get any better than watching him work.  She was beginning to realize that, no matter what it was exactly that he was specifically working on.

Justin finally stepped up to Cassidy and kissed her cheek.  Leaning into her ear, he whispered, “sorry about the f-bomb in there.  Think he caught it?”

Honestly, she could care less at the moment.  She was about as far from mommy-mode as possible.  She shook her head no.

“You ok?” he asked, probably realizing her focus was a bit fuzzy.

This time she nodded.  “I’m fantastic,” she replied.

He smiled kind of giddy-like and said, “good.”  Then asked, "everything ready to go?"

She nodded again.  They were taking a red-eye to New York in just 8 hours.  Unfortunately Justin had studio time booked until time to head to the airport.  He was going to have to meet them there.  It was the first time they were traveling on a commercial flight together and Cassidy was a bit nervous about that.  They were in first class, of course, but still nervewracking.  

They were also taking their new Swedish nanny.  She was young--early to mid twenties--and hot, but Cassidy couldn't complain because she'd hired her.  She'd had the best qualifications and Cody had loved her instantly.  Gwen had only been part of the team for three weeks, but so far it'd been awesome having her on board.

And it would be especially great traveling with someone who could really care for Cody and allow Cassidy to spend that time with Justin.  He was performing at a charity event and she was beyond excited to see him on stage.  It would be her first time watching him live. If watching him in the studio was mesmerizing, she could only imagine how it would be seeing him in front of an audience.  She couldn't wait!

Watching him singing and dancing with Cody at home, being silly, would be nothing compared to what she was finally getting to see.  Of course, those moments were pretty priceless.  She couldn't argue that either.  Especially when they were in their pajamas, dancing and singing.  Cassidy cherished those times more than anything.  The bond she had watched grow between Justin and their son made her feel more emotion than she could have ever possibly imagined.

And those moments had been happening more often than not now that Cody had taken an interest in Justin's music.  Cassidy couldn't imagine her life anymore fulfilling than it had become over the last few months.

Life had become so full that thoughts of a career revamp fell to the backburner. Hard to believe when that's all she could think about for months, but she was just so darn happy she wanted to be around her family all the time.  Working would mean that she wouldn't and at the moment she couldn't stand the thought of being away from them.

She'd gone from daydreaming vehemently about returning to the work world to hoping that an opportunity wouldn't fall at her feet knowing if it did she couldn't turn it down.  She hadn't forgot about the run in with Jim Benson when they'd been in Mexico nearly two months earlier.  If ESPN came knocking on her door, it'd be extremely difficult to turn it down.  That was a decision she did not want to make.  Things had just changed in her heart and in her mind.  

That hardness that she'd held on to all of her life had slowly dissapated away.  Somewhere in between Christmas and New Years her priorities had shifted tremendously.  Maybe it was the way Cody's eyes lit up on Christmas morning, opening presents with not just her for a change, but with a father... a father who adored him and cherished him and perhaps spoiled him just a little too much.  Ok, who was she kidding?  A lot too much.

Once the shift happened internally it seemed to take on a life of its own inside of her.  The more she opened herself up and let herself truly feel all of the wonderful things happening the more those feelings consumed her.  Although she liked to think they consumed her in a positive way.  And as she began planning for Justin's birthday celebration at the end of the month, the excitement of her new life engulfed her even more.  

Justin was wiped out as he finally wrapped up for the day.  He knew he probably wouldn't sleep on the plane but he and Cassidy both had agreed a red-eye would be the easiest choice with Cody.  Especially since they were flying commercial.  He'd grown as much of his beard as possible and he knew how to shade his face pretty good with a hat, but somehow someone always recognized him. It was inevitable.  At least it was a nonstop fight.  They'd land in NYC just after 7 a.m., be ushered to the suite and their hotel, where he could finally get some sleep.  

He was meeting Cassidy, Cody and their staff in the First Class lounge at LAX.  He couldn't wait to see her.  His days had been long since he'd got back into the studio.  A lot of times she and Cody were both asleep by the time he got home. That fact often left him unsettled, which was odd to him.  He'd always preferred late hours while recording.  And as envigorated as he was to be back in the studio, he'd grown accustomed to being home with his family.  

Perhaps he'd taken too much time off.  He'd grown soft.  He'd turned into a family man and lost some of his work ethic, or feeling of it anyway.  But he was figuring it out.  This is what he'd wanted for longer than he could remember.  He just had to figure out how to balance it all.  He was doing his damdest to try.

Justin had always been a workaholic.  You don't get to the top of your game without putting in a lot of blood, sweat and tears.  Thankfully Cassidy seemed to understand.  She was extremely accomodating to his schedule.  That's the only reason why things were working out so well.  

As far as the mental battle going on inside his head, he kept that to himself.  Although, it did have a tendancy to come out in his writing.

When he finally met up with everyone at the airport--after a grueling escort by his security team--he was both exhausted and relieved.  He felt like collapsing into the chair next to Cassidy, but instead he sat calmly, leaning in to kiss her cheek.  Cody was asking questions about the airplanes viewable through the big glass windows overlooking the tarmac.  He could tell by the look on her face that she was just as exhausted as he was.  Her eyes screamed at him: Please save me...quick! 

And he found himself doing just that.  "Come here, Code..." he beckoned to his little boy, shortening his name to one syllable.  

"Yes Daddy?"  the cherub looking almost 5 year old looked up at him with crisp and curious blue eyes.

Justin summoned him with a tilt of his head and a lift of his eyes.  Cody practically pranced over to the bigger man.  Without a word, Justin reached down and scooped up all 42 pounds of him.  "Hop on," he said, and lifted him up to his shoulders.  Cody's hands clasped around Justin's neck.  "Let's get a closer look," he said, and moved towards the windows.

When they were close enough, Cody reached a hand out and touched the cool glass.  "Daddy?" 

"Yes, son?"

"I like airplanes."  Cody remarked cooly.

"Me too," Justin replied, both hands gently gripping the boy's little thighs.  Cody shifted and grabbed on to Justin's hat.  "Daddy has been on a LOT of airplanes," Justin continued.

"How many?" the boy immediatedly asked.

"Thousands..."

Cody gasped, in awe. "Thousands?" 

"Yep."

"Why?" he asked, his hand moving from Justin's hat and back to the side of his neck. His hand was just a tad sticky, like maybe he'd spilled some juice out of his cup and the residue was left on his fingers.  Not exactly uncommon for a little boy.  Oddly, Justin didn't mind the feeling in the slightest bit. 

The front of Cody's warm tummy pressed into the back of Justin's head. "Daddy has to go all different places for work," Justin explained.  "All over the world..." he elaborated further.

"All over the world?" Cody repeated questioningly.  "Mommy said that when I was a baby we flew all the way to Nebraska."

Justin immediately found himself thinking of why Cassidy was in Nebraska, of all places, when Cody was a baby.  

"And also to New O'leans and to At Lanta," the boy continued.

Atlanta brought on Justin's own memories of Cassidy--very hot, intimate memories.  He supressed those memories quickly as well as the smile that came with them.  He focused instead on Cody's pronunciation.  "Atlanta," Justin repeated the word correctly for him.

"Atlanta," Cody repeated with a much better attempt.

"That's a lot of places to visit when you're a baby," Justin said, noticing Cassidy's reflection in the glass window.  She was watching them, which made him all warm and fuzzy inside.

"uh huh" Cody agreed quickly. "Mommy said I was the best baby ever on the airplanes."

An unexpected ache shot through Justin's heart as it so often did when he let thoughts of the years he missed with Cody enter his mind. He didn't want to miss any other moments of his son growing up. He'd make sure that never happened one way or another.  He was determined.  And when Justin Timberlake was determined he did not back down for anything.

Cassidy found herself gazing blankly across the aisle as Cody slept with his head on a pillow next to Gwen. It felt wrong. He was just right across the row--an arms reach if not less--but still she realized that she hadn't gotten as used to him having a nanny as she'd thought. 

The plane had been in the air for nearly an hour. She couldn't imagine that she'd be sleeping anytime soon. It just felt too weird. 

It was at that moment she felt the warmth of Justin's hand, his fingers sliding in between hers. "Can we make a pact?" He was leaning into her ear and the warmth of his breath heated her from the inside out.  It was hard not to think of how it felt on other parts of her body...

But the nature of his question quickly shook her out of her own thoughts. "Like what?"

"To never be away from each other for more than a week or two. Please? It's important to me."

Her brow must've furrowed in confusion. Where did this come from?  

"I don't want to miss anything," he finally revealed in a whisper. Cassidy understood how much this meant. There was almost a pleading in his tone and his blue eyes were dark and serious. 

But she also knew that agreeing to such a pact opened up room for heartache and disappointment, on both ends. 

Tenderly she pressed her mouth to his neatly groomed stubble before speaking.  "Justin, I don't want to spend a day away from you, much less a week, or even worse, two, but I also don't want to commit to a pact that will most likely be broken at some point.  I don't see how we can avoid it with your work schedule."

His chin fell and she knew that her words were not what he wanted to hear.

"It's ok..." she immediately felt the need to explain herself.  "I understand that your career may take you away from us and trust me when I say that Cody and I will be waiting for you when you get back... no matter what."  She felt in her heart that she could say that in all honesty.  God forbid, even if something happened between the two of them, she would always make sure Cody maintained a strong relationship with his father. She'd never make that mistake again.

His expression sobered even more as his dark hooded eyes bore into hers with an all-knowing seriousness.  "My heart aches everytime I think about what I've already missed.  I can't stand thinking about missing anything else."

It was as if a knife had been plunged deep into her chest.  His hurt pained her more than anyone else's pain ever had.  It was a deep, sweltering feeling. The guilt that accompanied those feelings would never subside.  She was sure of it.  

Instantly she collapsed into his side, trying to hold him as best she could with the barrier of the arm rest of their first class seats between them.  "Justin. I promise, with everything, that I will not let you miss anything else.  That I promise you.  No matter what happens between us.  I promise."

"Cass," he whispered, "people in my business miss things all the time... ALL the time."

"I know, sweetheart.  But you will not miss anymore of Cody's life.  I will make sure of it."

"It's not just that..." his voice was so quiet she could barely hear him.  She wondered if it was because they were on a public airplane or because the words were hard to get out.  "I hate that I missed being there for you..."

"That's not your fault. That's my fault."

His expression was sobering as his eyes met hers again. "I'm not saying it's your fault or my fault. All I'm saying is that I hate that I missed sharing that with you."

It was hard not to let her mind wander about the what might have been's if he had been a part of her life during her pregnancy. Visions of him rubbing her round belly and feeding her Ben and Jerry's Cherry Garcia ice cream (her biggest craving) while cuddling on the sofa together sped through her mind. But she shook it quickly. The what might have been's were probably far off from the what would have been's.  And before she could stop herself, her mouth opened and the words "we could always try for a repeat" came out. 

A repeat?

She watched with fascination as his serious expression turned to sexy playfulness, his neatly groomed brow rising with intrigue, his forehead creasing in response. "I would like that," he smoothed his warm palm over the top of her hand and then up her forearm. "But you know my feelings on us already."

She did. He'd made it very clear that he wanted to be with her and that he wanted it to be in a formal and official capacity. 

"We probably shouldn't wait too long to give Cody a brother or sister. He's almost 5 already."

"Can you imagine me going on tour with you 7 or 8 months pregnant?" She whispered the question, hardly believing she was voicing the thought out loud. 

"Yes," came his immediate and confident response. "We'd have every luxury at our disposal and I'd bring a whole medical team with us if necessary."  Cassidy was grinning at the thought. But Justin didn't see it. He'd leaned in to press his lips against her head. "I love you," he told her softly.  "Let's try and get some rest."

They did. And she tried. Finally managing to fall asleep some 45 minutes later, visions of her pregnant on a tour bus floating through her head. 

Cassidy woke up when the cabin lights came on. The plan was prepping for landing. She felt Justin stretching in his seat beside her as she glanced Cody's direction. He was awake, gripping his blue and green dinosaur blanket, sitting sleepily but upright in his seat. "You ok, buddy?" She called over to him quietly. 

He answered with a groggy "yes."  

We'll be in our hotel soon and you can go back to sleep."

"Ok mommy"

"He did well," Gwen was remarking quietly. Cassidy nodded--sort of a thank you--then straightened herself. 

"Were you able to get some sleep?" Justin asked. 

"A little. Off and on."

"Me too. We'll be the first to get off so be ready."

She nodded in compliance. 

Twenty minutes later they were off the plane and rushed quickly through the airport. A limo was waiting for them outside as security retrieved their luggage. Cody cuddled sideways on Cassidy's lap while they waited, the little boys legs were stretched across Justin's lap and he and Cassidy sat thigh to thigh. He was almost back to sleep.

"Just a few more minutes" Justin was saying. Cassidy tenderly stroked her fingers through Cody's curls as Justin leaned in to kiss the boys temple. 

Thoughts of pregnancy danced through her mind again. She wanted to give Justin another baby. She wanted to have the full experience with him. 

Her decision was made. She was stopping her birth control immediately.