Ever since I was a little girl, back in Tennessee, I had life goals that I wanted to achieve. But doesn’t everyone? I mean my best friend always knew what he wanted to do with his life. He says the moment that he and some of our friends performed songs by New Kids on the Block in our school talent show that he wanted to be a musician. And he was in the third grade. My name is Lorelei McBane, but you can call me Lori. Everyone else does, well everyone except my mother. Me, I wanted it all. I wanted to see the world. I wanted to fall in love with an amazing guy, but I would settle for nothing less than prince charming. I wanted get married to said amazing guy, and have tons and tons of babies. And also have this amazing career that I would wake up everyday anticipating what was to wait for me at work. Well I’m twenty four, and nothing of that sort has happened yet.

I haven’t seen the world. I haven’t got my prince charming, and at the rate I’m going I don’t seem to have him in my near future. I don’t have tons and tons of babies, because of the detail mentioned before. I know, I know, I don’t have to be married to have a child. But if you met some of the men that I have dated in the past, you wouldn’t want them to father your dog. The thought of artificial insemination has crossed my mind, but where’s the fun in that? Then we have my career. Ha! My career. Where do I even begin? Don’t get me wrong, I love what I do. But I don’t wake up anticipating it by any means. Maybe that’s because I don’t really get to sleep sometimes. Wonder what I do yet? I am currently employed by my best friend, Justin Timberlake. I am his Personal Assistant. I got my Bachelor’s in Public Relations, and while I was in college I touched a few business courses and, if I do say so myself, didn’t do too badly in them at all. I am hoping to eventually get a job at WEG. That would be awesome. So I’m sure you’re asking, “If you’re friends with Justin, why haven’t you seen the world? You are his PA right?� Well, I’m glad you asked, because I haven’t always been his PA. I’m sure you remember Trace? You know the short thing that you always saw permanently attached to Justin’s side? Yeah he’s another one of my good friends, and I sort of took over after I graduated college, and he and Justin started their clothing line. So, anyway, I haven’t really got to see much of the world because I couldn’t always travel with Trace and Justin because of college, and when I did come on as his PA I was to busy to see anything important if we weren’t there for more than two days.

See, that’s where the job loses its perks. Other than that I love my job. I know I shouldn’t have really been worrying about the personal part of my life at twenty four, but I want so desperately to fall in love. And every time I see a baby I have to fight the urge not to steal them away. I always stop to talk to the baby, and the mother, which annoys Justin to no end. But who cares? I spend all day looking after his ass; the least he can do is let me have my “I-want-to-be-a-mommy� moment. I know he loves children as much I do; he just has a rep to protect. Well tonight is New Year’s Eve, and I’m spending it at home in Tennessee with my mom, Justin’s mom, Trace’s Family, Trace, and Justin. It’s 11:50 ten more minutes until midnight and the year 2007. See, I have this tradition with myself that no matter where I am on New Year’s Eve, I seclude myself ten minutes before midnight, and make my New Year’s wish. Yep, that’s right, Wish. I used to do the resolution thing, but it never worked for me. Besides I can’t just resolute to find the man of my dreams, and babies. I figure if I wish for it, maybe it’ll happen. Yes I know I watch Disney movies way to much, but a girl can dream right? So right now I’m out on Lynn’s patio looking up at the sky, wrapping myself in Justin’s huge coat. Alright, so it’s not huge, but for someone that’s 5’3, and 135. The jacket is huge, but it was the first thing that was warm that I saw on the way out. I glance down at my watch, and see that it’s 11:59.

“Alright, Lor. Here’s to a better 2006.� I say to myself, as I find a star in the sky and fix my concentration on it. So it’s not a falling star, but it’s a star none the less, and who knows maybe it’ll work this time around? I wish for my usual, and glance down to see that it’s 12:00.

I can hear the loud commotion inside, yells of “Happy New Year!� the loud music of Auld Lang Sine coming from the TV, and the sounds of party buzzers. I smile and head towards the door to go back in. Boy did I have a year ahead of me. If I could have known what was lying ahead, I could have been a little more prepared. Then again I don’t think anything could have prepared me for what I was about to experience.

I hate LA in the mornings. No, I mean seriously hate LA in the mornings. If you had somewhere to go anywhere from seven to at least eight thirty, and had to be there on time, you could almost bet you were going to be late.

So that was back in January when I made that wish, and it’s now July. Still no sign of Mr. Right and no ever growing belly. In the time span of 7 months I have managed to date asshole after asshole. One guy seemed to fit the bill perfectly. We dated for about 4 months, but it turned out that he wanted to be seen next to someone who had links to someone big. Yeah, he hit the curb, and was real close to shattering my heart, but Trace and Justin mended it back together. It’s sad when the only men that you can depend on are them two. Wow, what is my life coming too?

“Come on!� I yelled, slamming my right palm against the steering wheel of my black 2002 Mazda 626. It’s my baby. Nice, but not to flashy, and not exactly hard on the pocket book either. I propped my elbow on the side of the door, and pressed my thumb and fore finger on the bridge of my nose. I rolled my eyes when I heard the sound of my cell phone ringing from the cup holder. I looked at the caller ID and thought seriously about ignoring it. But knowing that one ignore would result in a million more calls until I picked up, I answered it.

I pressed the green phone button on my Black Slvr, and answered with nothing short of bitch in my voice, “Hello?�

“Where are you?�

I gripped the steering wheel tighter at the sound of Justin’s voice coming through the phone, “I am stuck in traffic on the interstate, because you just had to have your coffee from one Starbuck’s at the end of the earth, and not the one a block from your house.�

Luckily he’s my best friend and knows how I function. I am just as useless as he is in the mornings, especially on mornings where I didn’t get much sleep the night before. He laughed at the tone of my voice, “Did they not have your coffee that you wanted?�

Damn he knew me too well. “No, they didn’t. Something about a low supply and a new shipment. They offered me a free one if I could wait because the shipment was due to arrive any minute, but I informed them that I had a bitchy pop star on my hands, so I would have to make due with out it.� Finally reaching an exit where I could get the hell off Interstate from Hell, I angrily flipped on my left turn signal, and made my way off into freedom. God, did it feel good to be going over 15 mph.

“I’m sorry. What if I make you a Justinbuck’s coffee? I can’t promise the best, but I can try.�

I had to smile, his coffee was hell, but I needed something or as the day wore on I would be intolerable to be around. “I don’t know what I’m walking into, but I need some sort of pick me up so I’ll accept.�

“How far away are you? Should I put it on now?�

“Not too far. I just got off on the closest exit, so it shouldn’t be long.�

“Alright. I’ll see you in a few.�

“Ok, bye.� I said as I hit the end button and placed it back in the cup holder.

Ten minutes later, I was getting out of my car in Justin’s garage with my laptop bag/briefcase, purse, and Justin’s coffee. We met each other at the garage door with coffee. He held the mug out to me, and smiled, “Truce?�

I laughed, and shoved his coffee at him, and grabbed mine, “I guess.� I said as I took a sip. He let me enter, and I laid my bag and my purse on the counter in his kitchen.

I leaned up against the counter, still sipping my coffee, as I came up to me, “So what do we have planned for me today?�

“You have studio time today at two o’clock to put some finishing touches on that song that you and Tim were working on, and then we have the rest of the day to do whatever. I think I’m going to catch up on some sleep.�

“Sorry, I kept you out last night.�

“No problem, although I don’t understand why my opinion on the songs were so important.�

“I value your opinion, you’re my best friend. Besides you’re the only person I could get an honest opinion out of. Everyone else will just tell me what I want to hear.� Justin said taking a sip of his coffee. It wasn’t so hot now considering it a reasonable amount of time to cool off.

“Well, then, I’m glad I could help.� I say patting him on the shoulder and reaching up to place a kiss on his cheek. I walked around to the other side of the counter and unzipped my bag taking out my laptop.

“So, Trace and I were talking about going out tonight? You think after your much needed beauty nap, you’ll be up to it?�

My head popped up at the comment, “Beauty nap?�

“Well, let’s face it. You’re not exactly looking your best right now. You practically look like you rolled out of bed.�

My jaw fell open. He better be glad I knew he was kidding, “Well I’m sorry I don’t wake up with the Gods of Beauty on my side.� I said fixing my gaze back on the screen of my laptop.

“So are you saying I’m gorgeous?� he said wiggling his eyebrows up and down.

“Yeah, if you call a dogs ass beautiful.�

This time Justin’s jaw dropped, “Ouch.�

“Aw, did that poke a hole in your ego?�

“I am taking my coffee and drinking it elsewhere.� Justin said as he grabbed his coffee and turned to walk into his living room. I had to laugh. I swear sometimes he can be such a girl.

“What time are you and Trace going out?� I asked not taking my eyes away from the screen, and sipped my coffee.

“I’m still not talking to you!� he called from the living room.

“What time?� I asked again rolling my eyes and smiling.

“I’m not going to tell you until you apologize!�

“I can just as easily call Trace. You could just save me some minutes and tell me now!� I called back.

“And you can save my ego from deflating into oblivion by apologizing!�

“Fine! I’m sorry!� I called back smiling.

“I don’t think you meant it!�

“My god Justin! You can’t be serious!�

“As a heart attack!�

“Fine.� I said as I got up from my stool in the kitchen to walk into the living room, “I’m sorry for questioning your looks, and comparing them to a dog’s ass.�

“I forgive you. We were planning on somewhere between nine and ten. Is that enough time?�

“Sounds fine with me, except one of you two are going to be the DD and not me this time. I have major plans for myself and a bottle of something hard.�

Justin smiled, “Hard week?�

“Yeah. Between dealing with your shit, and dealing with asshole number 308, I’ve had more than my fill.�

“How long were you and this one dating?�

“A month.� I said as I fell into the couch beside him. I was this close to giving up on my dream of having the perfect relationship, and the whole male species. I could deal with being single for the rest of my life, and I was already well acquainted with my mechanical friend that was hidden in my nightstand drawer and my adjustable shower head, why not make a relationship out of it? Besides the only good orgasm I’ve had in three months is one that I gave myself. The last person that knew what he was doing in the bed was the asshole that almost broke my heart that I was telling you about. I guess I should tell you his name is Brandon, and man was he hot.

As if he read my thoughts, “Don’t worry. You’ll find him soon enough.� He said as he stood up and walked into the kitchen. I followed close behind. “Does that explain the zombie motif you’ve got going on today?� He asked as he grabbed his keys from the hook over his phone.

My mouth dropped as he laughed. I slugged him hard in the shoulder as I walked over to my laptop to shut it off. I stole a glance of myself in the patio door. Did I really look that bad? Ok, maybe I did. I took in my reflection and decided that I needed to get myself together before I went out with Tracetin tonight. Yeah, I gave them one of those celebrity relationship names since they’re practically a couple anyway. But I guess when you add me into the relationship you get Tracetinlai. Anyway, back to the point at hand. My reflection was hideous. My hair that’s chestnut brown, shoulder length, and layered was shoved into a messy ponytail. My normally make-up clad face was make up free, and showing every flaw that my Ivory complexion had. My blue eyes were a shade darker than normal showing just how tired I was, not to mention they were puffy from the crying that I had done only a few hours earlier. My well kept figure wasn’t hidden to bad with the clothes that I had on. Although my choice in clothes on a normal day wouldn’t consist of a black pair of velour pants, and white tank top. While comfortable it’s not something that I would normally wear to work even though my employer is my best friend, and we didn’t really have anything scheduled that required the normal work attire.

Justin saw me giving myself the once over in the patio door. He walked over to me and wrapped me in a hug, “I was thinking. Since we have nothing to do until two how about you go pretty yourself up and we’ll go out to breakfast and goof off until two?�

I wrapped my arms around him, but looked up at him with a gloomy face, “Are you saying that you would want to go anywhere with me when I’m anything less than presentable?�

Justin rolled his eyes, “I couldn’t care one way or the other but I know you will. So that’s why I suggested you go use the girly shit that you leave in the guest bedroom, and do whatever it is you have to do so we can go eat.� He said as he placed a kiss on the top of my head, and pulled away.

I sighed, and took his advice, “Give me ten minutes.�

Justin rolled his eyes and took a swig of his water. He knew full well that then minutes was going to eventually turn to twenty before they could get out of the house.

I slammed the shot glass back on the counter, and shoved the lime into my mouth. I shook my head, and took the lime out of my mouth. Justin and I spent the day together, did his studio thing. I managed to get my nap somewhere in there. I don’t know how I managed to get up, but I did. And here I am.

“Why don’t you just leave the bottle?� I told the bartender as I jerked the bottle out of his hand and poured more into my glass. He laughed, and moved on to his other customer. Just to let you in on a little secret, Tequila and I don’t really mix well. Just a few shots and I’m pretty much done. So, just imagine what a whole bottle will do. I grabbed my limes, bottle, and glass and made my way over to where my friends were sitting. I barely made it into the booth where Tracetin were without damaging something.

“Are you ok, Lor?� Trace asked.

“Fine, fine. I’m fine.� I slurred and shoved some hair out of my face.

“You sure?� he asked barely able to hide the smile.

“Yes, would you leave me the hell alone?� I said throwing a lime at his head, “Wait I need that give it back.� I said holding my hand out.

“I think you’ve had enough.� Trace said reaching over to get my bottle, and placing the lime back on the table.

“Hey! I paid for this damn thing! You want some go get your own damn bottle!� I said snatching it out of his hand.

Trace laughed and shook his head, “You’re going to regret this in the morning.�

“Well I’ll just worry about that when I get there won’t I?� I said pouring Jose into my glass. I made a face before downing the liquid, slammed the glass down on the table and immediately shoved a lime in my mouth.

Trace laughed again, “Your face was priceless.�

“Would you go find some hoe to dance with and leave me alone?�

“You’re an evil drunk.� Trace said with a laugh, but whispered in my ear, “I like it.�

I wrinkled my nose in disgust, and pushed him out of the booth, “I am not drunk yet, and that was repulsive to have you whisper in my ear like that.�

Trace sat back down in the booth, and looked over to Justin who seemed to be having fun out on the dance floor with some chick, and didn’t look to far behind me where alcohol was concerned, “Damn. Looks like I’m the DD tonight.�

“Sokay, buddy.� I slurred as I patted him on the shoulder. “I’ll make it up to you.�

Trace stood up, and shook his head, “I guess I’ll go find me a girl to dance with. You take it easy on that Cuervo, ok?�

I wrinkled my nose in disgust again, and fanned him away, fixing my attention on said Cuervo, “Yeah, yeah, whatever.�



By one o’clock it was time to go, and Trace was having a time hauling Justin and I to the car. At that point I couldn’t even tell you what color the car was.

“Come on guys! Seriously, who cares who gets shot gun? Both of you can sit in the back as far as I’m concerned.� Trace said as yanked open the back seat door, and shoved me into the car.

“Ouch! Damn.� I said where my head had hit the handle bar. It was once again hit when Justin was shoved into me, but this time I hit it on the window.

“Get off me.� I said pushing at him with out much effort. I didn’t care nauseous, and his sweaty smell wasn’t helping matters at all. Plus you add Trace’s driving to the mix, and I was ready to hang my head out of the window. I looked over at Justin and could tell he wouldn’t be far behind me. Luckily, we made it home in one piece, and with not puking. Somehow, Trace managed to get us both up the stairs, and had left us to fend for ourselves. After a while some of the drunken stupor that I found myself in started to wear off, but not enough to where I remember what the hell I did once I woke up. When Trace left he left Justin and I in his room so we laid there for a while talking. I couldn’t even sit up without my head feeling like the world got knocked off its axis much less walk to my room or drive to my apartment. So, I preferred to just chill with Justin tonight. With the sudden urge to pee, I found myself trying to sit up once more, and did so successfully. No spinning room, no seeing double, I guess I’m good. I began to try stand up, and my legs felt like pudding. I grabbed a hold of the nightstand beside me, and listened to Justin laugh at me.

“Shut up! I have to pee.� I said trying not to laugh at myself.

“Need some help?� I heard him ask, and heard him stand up.

“That would be like the blind leading the blind, I think I’ll pass.� I said but felt him grab a hold of my arm and start leading me to the bathroom.

“Justin, I can make it myself. Just go back over there before we end up hurting ourselves.� As if on cue, Justin tripped over one of the shoes that he had kicked off, and of course took me down with him. Luckily he broke my fall. The next thing I remember was us laughing, and then the laughter subsiding as we both looked at each other, and him kissing me.



I woke up to sun peeking through curtains in a room that I knew wasn’t mine, and a pounding headache. Rolling over carefully, I looked around and realized that I was in Justin’s room. Then I remembered going out with Trace and Justin the night before, and me downing a whole bottle of Tequila. Yep, that would explain the headache pounding through my head like a freight train. I looked over to my side, and saw Justin’s bareback. I rubbed a hand over my face, and tried to sit up without any sudden movement. I didn’t think my stomach could handle it. I turned to get out of bed when the sheet fell down, and I saw my bare thighs, then traveled up and saw my bare chest. OH…MY…GOD.

“Don’t freak out. Don’t freak out.� I whispered to myself. Please tell me I didn’t. I wasn’t that drunk was I? Wait, don’t answer that. I tried really hard to remember anything that I could, and the last thing that I remember was he and I kissing. Anything after that was a foggy haze.

“Oh, god.� I moaned as I placed my head in my hands. Well, just because we kissed, and I’m naked doesn’t necessarily mean that we had sex right? I could have just stripped down and slept like this right? I mean it wouldn’t be the first time I had done it. Well, it was the first time that I slept naked with my best friend. I gripped the sheet closer to my body. I grabbed a shirt that I guessed was Justin’s and threw it on over my and leaned back against the head board. This was all too much to absorb with a looming hangover. Well, there was only one way to actually find out. I had to be brave, and life the sheet. Luckily his back was facing me so I didn’t have to look at the front. I’ve seen his ass more times that I care to admit, but only because he mooned me. Bracing myself for the worst, I lifted the sheet a little bit, and took a peek.

“Shit. Damn, damn, damn.� I said letting the sheet fall down. Yep, you guessed right. There was a bare ass under them sheets. This was not good. Nope, not good at all. Not only did I sleep with my best friend, but my employer! And I didn’t even remember it! Did we even use protection? I wasn’t even on birth control anymore. Was it any good?

“Ugh, stop thinking that.� I said disgustedly at the thought of my best friend being any good in the bed. That was just gross. Deciding that blanks needed to be filled in I gently shook Justin to get him to wake up.

“Justin, wake up.� I said softly. He moaned tiredly and got rubbed his head deeper into the pillow. Deciding to be more forceful, I shook him again.

“Justin, I’m serious wake up.� I said.

“What?� I heard him say angrily as he rolled over to face me.

“Do you remember anything about last night?�

By the look on his face he just remembered what happened, and why it was that he had a headache from hell.

“No not really? Why?� he said as he slowly sat up, and rubbed a hand over his face. The sheet fell to his waist leaving a chest, that even I had to admit, wasn’t so bad to look at.

“Well I woke up a couple of minutes ago, and I didn’t have any clothes on. All my clothes were on the floor, and I normally don’t sleep naked with my best friend.� I said giving Justin a minute to let it all sink in.

“Huh-uh, no way. There’s no way…� he faded off as he lifted the sheet, and looked at his scantily clad lower half. “Shit. Shit, shit, shit. How did this happen?�

“I don’t know that’s why I’m asking you.� I said

“I don’t remember anything.� He said rubbing his temples with his fingers, “This isn’t going to make anything weird between us is it? Because the last thing I need right now is things being weird between you and I. You and Trace are the only things that I can count on to stay the same in my life.�

I smiled a sympathetic smile. Sometimes I felt bad for the guy. To tell the truth that was the only thing that I worried about were things being weird between us, but how could things be weird between us if there was nothing to remember? I only remembered the kiss, but it wouldn’t be the first time Justin kissed me. He was my first kiss, but that was way back in fifth grade with a game of Spin the Bottle. I still claim that it was rigged. Then there was the time that we were both really drunk on Christmas Eve, and Trace hung a mistle toe over our heads. That was two years ago. I still find myself thinking about that kiss, but it didn’t make things weird between us. So how could this be any different? I mean I can’t remember anything about it, and who knows maybe it was so horrible that I want to keep it that way? Ha!

“I know. No, I don’t think it’s going to make anything weird between us. I don’t remember anything anyway. We’ll just put this behind us. No one has to know except you and me.� I said putting a sympathetic hand on his shoulder.

“Ok, and just for the record I’m sorry.�

“What do you have to be sorry for? I obviously took part in this just as much as you did.� I said laughing

“You know you want my sexy bod.� He said rubbing his chest.

“Yeah right.� I said leaning down to grab my underwear, and put them on under the sheets. “You don’t have anything planned for today. So you can spend today nursing your hangover.� I said standing up. “Why don’t you go take a shower, and I’ll make us some coffee?�

Justin closed his eyes in bliss, “That sounds amazing. Give me ten minutes.� He said as I walked out of the bedroom door to give him his privacy. So far everything was normal.

: One Month Later:

It was eight thirty in the morning when Justin and I walked into the studio. It was now nine thirty and I was hugging the toilet in the women’s rest room. Once I was finished heaving in the toilet, I reached up to flush it. I stood slowly and walked out of the stall. I looked at myself in the mirror, and did not like what I saw. In the past month I had gained 3 pounds, and how I don’t know because for the past couple of weeks I couldn’t even stand the sight or the smell of food. Not to mention all the throwing up I’ve been doing. I grabbed a towel, wet it, and began to wipe my face. My mascara was running from where some tears had escaped while I was throwing up. I touched up my make up, and deciding that I was as presentable as I was going to get, I walked out of the bathroom.

“Are you ok?�

I jumped when I heard Justin’s voice coming from the other direction. He was leaning against the water fountain on the right side of the women’s restroom. “Shit, you scared me. I didn’t see you standing there.�

He walked over to me and grabbed my hands, “I’m sorry I scared you. I heard you in there. Are you ok?�

I smiled the best I could, “I’m fine. I think I just have a bug or something. I’ll get over it in a few days.�

“I think you should take the day off, and go see a doctor. I don’t really need you here today anyway.�

“Justin, I’m fine. It’s just a bug that I’ve got. I have some meds at home that’ll take care of it. I promise.� I said patting the side of his cheek gently.

“Lori, I’m worried about you. What if it’s something serious?�

I laughed softly, “Justin, you’re being overdramatic. Nothing is wrong with me.�

“It could be!� He said defensively, “I would be more comfortable if you went to see a doctor.�

I rolled my eyes, “Justin I am not going to go see a doctor over something this small. It’ll be out of my system in a few days, don’t worry.�

Sighing he got a serious look on his face, “Fine, but if you’re not better in two days you are going to the doctor if I have to drag you there myself.�

I rolled my eyes again, “Fine.�

“Now go home. Take the next couple of days off. I’ll come over and see how you’re doing when I’m finished here.�

“Justin I am…�

“I don’t want to hear it. What if what you have is contagious? You don’t want anyone around here getting sick now do you?�

“Fine, but I am perfectly capable of finishing out today.�

“Not when you’re hugging a toilet every ten minutes. Now go.� He said as he pointed toward the elevators.

“I need to get my stuff.�

“I’ll bring your laptop and stuff over tonight. You have your purse right?�

I sighed again, “Yes.�

“Your keys and cell phone?�

“Yes father.� I said with an annoyed tone. I swear he really knows how to stomp on all my nerves.

“Then that’s all you need.� He said as he wrapped an arm around me and we walked toward the elevators together. We stood there for a few seconds then he hugged me, and placed a kiss on my cheek. “I’ll be over when I’m done here.� He said as he walked back toward the studio door.

“Alright.� I said as I pressed the down button on the elevator.

“I mean it Lori go home and rest.�

“Alright, alright. Chill.� I said as stepped into the elevator. I hate being sick. I mean really, really, hate being sick. But I guess shit happens.



I had been home for three hours lying in my bed watching all sorts of stupid shit on TV. When you want to watch TV there’s never anything on. Not even a good movie. So imagine my excitement when my roommate and my friend walked in from work.

“Kel?� I called out from my room. Her name is Kelly, and she’s twenty three. She’s only a year younger than me, and boy is she crazy. She ranks right up there with Justin and Trace on the Friend Scale. She’s very beautiful. She’s 5’7� she has the perfect model body. You know the tall, slender physique that we “blessed� girls work hours on hours in the gym to get, but never get it? Yeah, she was born with it! She’s got some Latino in her, so her complexion is to die for. She has long black hair that falls right at her shoulder blades and it’s of course naturally straight. You know that naturally straight look that we have to work with a straight iron to get? Yep, you guessed it. She was born with it. She has very beautiful hazel eyes, but she hates them. I couldn’t ask for a better roommate. She doesn’t freak out when my friends come over, or when she sees me on TV trailing behind Justin making sure everything is perfect.

I heard the door to my bedroom open, and she was standing in the doorway, “Lori? What are you doing home? I though you had to be with Justin all day today?�

“He sent me home.� I said turning off the TV and setting the remote on my nightstand. She walked further into the room, and sat on my bed.

“Did you guys get into a fight?� she asked. Yes, Justin and I fight. But of course we make up like ten minutes later. I can’t stay mad at for too long. She was the only person that I told about mine and Justin’s drunken endeavor last month.

“No, we didn’t get into a fight. He sent me home because I was sick.�

“Still? Lori, you should go to the doctor.�

I rolled me eyes, “Justin said the same thing. No, I am not going to go to a doctor. It’s just a little…whatever the hell it is. I have enough meds to get rid of it.�

“What if it isn’t some little bug?�

I threw my head back into my pillow, and closed my eyes. Did Justin put her up to this? “It’s nothing serious!�

“Oh, I know. I don’t think you catch what I’m saying though.� She said

I leaned my head back up, and opened my eyes, “What?�

“Well it’s been a month since you and Justin…you know.�

I grimaced at the thought. I had almost forgotten about it. “Yeah, your point.�

“Well, you’ve been sick for a couple weeks now. When have you not gotten sick in the morning?�

“Last night. I was hugging the toilet from twelve until three this morning.�

“Twelve is still considered morning. Lori, have you thought that maybe you could be pregnant?�

My eyes practically bugged out of my head. There was no way in hell I could be pregnant! It wasn’t how it was supposed to go. So there was no way I was. I hadn’t met Prince Charming yet, and I wasn’t even married. Plus, I didn’t even remember it!

“No. No way.� I said shaking my head frantically.

“Come on Lor. There’s a pretty good chance you are. Did you guys use protection?�

My mouth stayed shut. How could answer that? I didn’t even know myself.

Her mouth flew open, “You didn’t use anything did you?�

“I don’t know!� I said panicked. I hadn’t thought of this. Oh god this was not good. What if I was? Justin didn’t need this right now. His album was almost ready to drop. I would be working my ass off, and traveling city to city this whole year. No, no, no, I couldn’t be. “Kelly, I can’t be.�

“There’s only one way to know.� She said smiling.

“Stop smiling! This is not a smiling matter.� I threw my head back into my pillow again, and placed my arm over my eyes. “I don’t even remember it. I don’t even know if I had an orgasm. I don’t even know if it was good.� I said on the verge of tears. This was so not how I imagined everything to be. Oh god what would my mother say? Well, she would be thrilled. She wanted me to have a baby more than I wanted to have a baby. Plus, she thinks that Justin walks on water anyway. As if on cue my phone chirped from the night stand. I grabbed it and looked at the ID and saw it was my mother. I threw my arm down still holding my phone. “Fuck. I can’t talk to her right now.�

“Here. I’ll talk to her.� Kelly said as she took my phone from me. I tried to fight back my tears as I heard her end of the conversation, “Hello? Oh his Mrs. McBane. Yes she’s here, but I don’t think she’s up to talking right now. Yeah, just a little under the weather. Yes mamn I sure will. Ok, you too.� She said as she hung up. “She wants you to call her when you’re feeling better.� She said as she placed my phone back on my nightstand.

“Great.�

“So do you want to find out or not? I’ll go down to the drug store, and buy two of the best.� She asked me as she stood up.

Well isn’t this just a marvelous way to end my day. “Sure, I guess.�

“Ok. I’ll do it, but you have to promise me something.�

“What?� I asked

“That you’ll go see the doctor first thing in the morning whether it shows Positive or Negative. I’ll go with you if you want me too. I’ll call in sick or something.�

It was nice to have someone to talk too about this, because I definitely couldn’t talk to Trace right now or Justin. But I guess I’ll have too soon enough. “Ok. I’ll go.�

“Good. I’ll be back in a few minutes.� She said as she walked out of my bedroom door, and I soon heard the sound of our door opening and closing as she walked out. This was great. This would only happen to me.



Thirty minutes later I was sitting on the edge of the bathtub with Kelly on the floor next to me. I was watching the two cups intently hoping for the best. “Has it been five minutes yet?� I asked.

Kelly looked down at her watch, “Two more minutes.� She said as she took my hand in hers for support. “Everything’s going to be fine. I promise, even if it turns out positive. It’s what you’ve always wanted right?�

I shook my head yes. It’s just…wow. I wasn’t expecting this for another few years. Oh well. I guess fate has a way of kicking you in the ass every once in a while, huh?

“Ok, it’s the moment of truth.� Kelly said, “Do you want to like at them or do you want me too?�

“You do it.� I said way too quickly. She stood up and walked to the counter. Oh god I couldn’t watch. Couldn’t I just bypass this moment? She looked back and forth at both of them, then up at me. I could tell she wanted to smile, but didn’t know if it would be best.

“Well?� I said getting annoyed at waiting.

“According to both of these you’re pregnant.�

I sat there in a daze staring at absolutely nothing. I was pregnant. I was carrying the Timberlake heir. Shit. Shit, shit, shit! A few tears escaped and fell down my cheeks. I didn’t know if they were tears of joy or…whatever else I was feeling at the moment.

“Oh honey. It’ll be ok.� Kelly said as she sat next to me on the bathtub. She wrapped me in a hug, and I cried silently into her shoulder. “Who knows? Maybe the test at the doctor’s office will say something different? It’s not the end of the world. You’re going to be a mom…� her encouraging words were cut short by the buzzer. My head shot up quickly. Shit. Justin was supposed to be bringing my stuff.

“Damn it. That’s Justin. He’s supposed to bring me my stuff that I left at the studio.� I said standing up. “I can’t see him right now. He’ll know something’s up and I can’t tell him right now. At least not until I get my shit straight.�

Kelly stood up at the sound of the buzzer going off again. “I’ll get buzz him up. You go in your room, and I’ll tell him that you’re resting and don’t want to be disturbed.�

“Ok. That might work.� I caught her by surprise as I threw my arms around her and hugged the hell out of her. “You are a life saver. I couldn’t have done this without you.�

“That’s what friends are for. Now, go one before he freaks out.� She said as she pushed me out the bathroom door and into my room. I heard walk to the buzzer, and buzz him up. I listened intently once he got to our door at the conversation going on outside.

“Hey Kel. I just came by to check on Lori. How is she?� he asked as Kelly let him in.

“She’s feeling better. She hasn’t thrown up again yet. She’s resting right now she didn’t get much sleep last night. To tell you the truth neither did I.� she said with a nervous laugh. I could tell she was having a hard time acting normal. But if I was out there he would have me confessing what was wrong in three minutes. I just couldn’t have that. Nope, nope, nope.

“Well if she’s resting I won’t disturb her. Just tell her that I dropped by, and brought her stuff. I’ll call her tomorrow.� Justin said opening the door.

“I will.� Kelly said

“Take care of our girl. Don’t let her do anything stupid.� Justin said with a laugh.

“I promise. I’ll call you if we need anything.�

Aw, he called me his girl. Well, not his per say, but he was included in that “our.�

“Ok, bye.� He said and a minute later the door shut behind him, and I heard Kelly sprint to my room. She threw the door open and slammed it behind her. “Holy shit. That was weird.�

“I know.� I said, “Imagine how it’s going to be once I actually tell him.� I winced at the thought, “I don’t even want to think about it. I just want to curl up in my bed and sleep the whole nine months away.�

“Sleep sounds like it might be best for you. I’ll go order us some take out, and call you when it’s here.�

“Ok.� I said as she shut the light off in my room and closed the door behind her. I instantly fell asleep, and didn’t even wake up when she called me to eat. I needed all the sleep I could get. I had a busy day ahead of me.

The next day Kelly took me to her Gynecologist, and I was sitting in one of the chairs reading the latest people magazine with my leg bouncing up and down nervously. “Lori, chill. It’s going to be fine. She’s the best there is.�

“I know, but wouldn’t you be nervous?�

“Yeah I guess I would.�

“Should I have told him…� I was cut short by the nurse calling my name.

“Lorelei McBane."

My head immediately turned in her direction, “That’s me.� I said putting my magazine down. I looked back at Kelly, and she smiled sympathetically at me as I walked toward the nurse.

“Is this your first time with Dr. Morgan?� she asked as she led me into a room. I took a seat on the exam table.

“Yes it is. She’s my best friend’s doctor, and she came highly recommended.�

“Are you here for an examination?�

“Well, no. I’m actually here for a pregnancy test.�

The nurse couldn’t hide her smile, “Well in that case you really don’t need to see the doctor unless you would just feel more comfortable with her doing it, but I could do it for you.�

I took the nurse up on her offer, and ten minutes later I was waiting with Kelly in a different room. Talk about the longest ten minutes of my life. My head snapped in the direction of the nurse entering the room, “I have your results.�

“Oh joy.� I mumbled under my breath. Kelly nudged me softly. “Sorry.� I mouthed to her.

“It looks like you’re one hundred percent pregnant. Congratulations.� I tried to smile, I honestly did. But nothing would turn up on my face. A few tears escaped, and the nurse immediately turned down the excitement. “I take it this wasn’t planned?� she asked sympathetically.

I shook my head, and wiped some tears off my face, “No, I have always wanted kids, it’s just this wasn’t the way I wanted it too happen.� I said. I wiped away some more tears, and waved it off, “It’s just really complicated.�

Kelly rubbed my back sympathetically, “Everything’s going to be ok. I’ll help you.�

The nurse smiled, “If you want I can write you some referrals to some really good OBGYN’s.�

I smiled despite the tears, “Thank you. That would be very nice.� I said smiling.

“Good. Just give me a few minutes, and I’ll have that right out to you.� She said as Kelly and I walked out the door, and back into the waiting area. That was the easiest part. Now I had the hardest to overcome.



“Hello?� I sighed when I heard Justin’s voice answer his phone. I was really hoping for a voicemail.

“Hey. What’s up?�

“Hey you. I was fixing to call and check up on you.�

“I’m feeling better. I haven’t hugged the toilet yet, but we still have the rest of the day ahead of us.�

“That’s good. I’m glad to hear it. Where are you?�

“I was on my way over to see you. Are you at home?�

“Actually I’m at the studio, but I’ll be done in about an hour. Is anything wrong?�

“Kind of. I just need to talk to you about something. But don’t rush. Take your time in the studio.�

“What’s up?� he asked. He was more than ready to listen to what I had to say, but I couldn’t tell him over the phone. Hell no.

“I can’t tell you over the phone, and no I’m not dying or deathly ill. I just need to talk to you.�

“Ok, well just go on over to the house. My mom’s there…�

Hold the phone. I don’t remember that. “What?�

“Remember she wanted to come and visit? Oh shit, I forgot to tell you. Well, she got here last night.�

I stopped at a red light and leaned my head against the steering wheel. This was going to make it ten times harder to tell him. How could I not tell Lynn? She was going to know something was wrong with me, and pry it out of me. That must be where her son got it. She was going to be a grandmother, and she’s like my own mother. I love that woman to death. No one else could know before Justin. That was it. He would be pissed. “That’s cool. I haven’t seen her in a while. I’ll have someone to keep me company.�

“I’ll be there as soon as I get a chance.�

The light turned green, and I still had my head on the steering wheel. I jumped when I heard a car horn that scared me. “Fuck.� I said as I quickly stepped on the gas.

“Are you sure you ok?� Justin asked laughing.

“I was just thinking, and didn’t see the light turn green.�

We said good bye, and I pulled into this driveway. I parked my car in front of his garage, and used the front door entrance. “Mom?� I called. Yeah I called her mom. I’ve known her just about as long as Justin has, and I haven’t called her anything but.

“Lori?� I heard her call out, and I soon saw her coming out of the den. “Honey, I thought you were sick? Justin said we probably wouldn’t see you for a few days.� She said with a smile as she wrapped me in a hug.

“Yeah well you know me. I can’t stay away for long. Plus I feel a little better today. I haven’t seen the bottom of the toilet since yesterday.�

“Well you shouldn’t be working when you’re sick.� She said pushing some hair out of my face and behind my ear. She grabbed hold of my hands and stepped back to look at me. “Honey, you look like you’ve lost some weight. You’re skinny enough as it is.�

“I actually gained three pounds since last month.�

“Well it sure doesn’t look like it. Come on, let’s get something to drink, and talk.� She said as led me into the kitchen. God, I hope I had the strength to keep this to myself.



A few hours later I was at Justin’s alone. Lynn had gone out to run some errands, and I found myself nervously waiting for Justin. I lay back on the couch, and had almost fallen asleep when I heard Justin’s voice enter the house.

“I’m home. Mom? Lor?�

“I’m in here!� I called, and a few seconds later I heard Justin enter the living room and sit down next to me.

“Where’s mom?� he asked looking around the room.

“She left about twenty minutes ago to run some errands.�

“You look better today. Do you feel any better?�

“Well I haven’t seen the bottom of a toilet since yesterday so I guess that’s an accomplishment.�

“Everyone’s asking about you.�

I was surprised, “Who?�

“Well you’re with me at the studio everyday almost. They were worried about you when I told them you were sick. Tim especially.� I had become very acquainted with Timbaland over the past few years, and especially in the last couple of months. The majority of this new album was done with Timbaland, and he’s a very nice guy, and extremely talented.

I smiled the first genuine smile of the day, “That’s nice. I went to the doctor today.� I said quickly.

“I thought you weren’t going to go to the doctor.�

“Well I found out something last night that kind of gave me that extra push. I needed a second opinion.�

I could see his face had worried written all over it. “What’s wrong?�

I sighed. There was absolutely no easy way to say this was there? I mean you can’t just come out and say, “Hey! I’m pregnant!� Nope that just wouldn’t work.

“Hey,� He said as he grabbed both of my hands, “you can tell me anything. We’re best friends, remember? Whatever it is I’ll help you with whatever I can. So, just tell me.�

Well, it’s his fault that I said it that way I did. “I’m pregnant.�

“Huh?� he asked confused.

“I’m pregnant.�

“How? I mean I know how, but you haven’t had a boyfriend. How far a long are you?�

“A month.�

He was about to say something, but I could tell that it finally hit why I needed to talk to him, and why I was so worried about telling him. “Oh shit.�

I think today was the most that I had cried in the past two years, and tears immediately sprang to my eyes. “I’m so sorry Justin. I know you don’t need this right now, and neither do I because I’m going to be just as busy as you…�

“Hey, hey, hey. It’s ok. It’s not just your fault. It’s mine too.�

“B-B-But what are we going to do?� I asked wiping at my tears for the hundredth time today. I swear I don’t normally cry this much.

“Well, I guess…I don’t know.�

“I hope you know that I don’t expect anything from you. Like a relationship, and all that shit. But I would really like to have you around for everything. I, I just, you’re my best friend and I can’t imagine going through this without you.�

He smiled and kissed the side of my forehead. “And I couldn’t imagine letting you go through this alone. Of course I’ll be there. For everything.� He said as he pulled me to him in a hug. I pulled my legs up on the couch and curled myself into him. I don’t know what I was so worried about. We laid there together for a while until we heard Lynn come in.

“Lori? Are you still here?� I heard ask, and that’s when I smelled the food that she brought in with her.

“We’re in here mom!� Justin called, and then looked down at me. “Lori? Are you ok?� He asked looking at me weird.

“Oh god.� I said as I slapped my hand against my mouth, and ran to the bathroom. I slammed the door behind me just as Lynn entered the living room.

“What happened?� she asked with concern

“She got sick again. I’m going to go check on her.� Justin said as he walked toward the bathroom. He knocked on the door, and winced at the sound of my…well, you get the drift. I don’t have to go into detail there do I? I didn’t think so. “You ok?� he said when he opened it.

With my head still in the toilet I moaned, “No.� He walked over to me, and pulled my hair out of my face.

“Are you through?� He asked.

“I think so. Can you get me a wash rag?�

“Sure.� He said as he grabbed a rag off the counter and wet it with warm water. He knelt down beside me and rubbed it on my face. “Feel better?�

“No.� I said with the only smile that I could muster. “I think it was the food that your mom brought in. For the past couple of days I haven’t been able to even look at food much less smell it. Even the smell of lettuce makes me sick, and you know how much I love salad.� I took the rag from his hands, and continued with the job. We both looked up at the voice that entered the bathroom with us.

“Honey are you ok? Do you need anything?�

I smiled, “No, Mom, I’m fine.�

“I suppose you don’t want to try and eat anything do you?�

I smiled and shook my head, “I think I’ll pass.�

Justin looked at his mother, “We’ll be out in a few minutes, Mom.�

“Alright. I hope you get better sweetheart. I hate to see any of my kids sick.� She said as she walked out of the bathroom.

“Want to try standing up?� he asked.

“Yeah.� I said as he held his hands out to help me up. “Thank you.� I said looking at myself in the mirror and making a face. “God I look like hell.� My face was once again clear from all make up, and my hair…well let’s just say it wasn’t the prettiest thing ever.

“You look sick. That’s all. Give it a few days.� Justin said patting my shoulder. “Do you think we should tell my mom?�

“Well, we’re going to have to sooner or later. I mean a few more months and I won’t be able to hide it.�

“Do you want to tell her together?� He asked.

“Why don’t we tell our parents separately? Speaking of which I need to call my mother.�

“She isn’t going to be mad is she?�

“Mad? No. Shocked, definitely.� I placed my hand on the knob, and walked into the foyer. “I can come back over if you want me too after I call my mom?� I said grabbing my keys.

“Yeah, that’ll be good. We have a lot to talk about.� He said smiling at me to reassure me that everything was going to be ok.

“I guess we do.� I said walking towards the door, “I’ll call you before I leave.� I said as I opened the door and stepped out onto the brick steps.

“Ok. Good luck.� He said smiling.

“You too.� I said as I reached my car, and pulled my sunglasses on my face. I sat in my seat, and took a deep breath. Yep, this was going to be an interesting next couple of months.

“Hello?� I smiled when I heard the sound of my mother’s voice answer her phone.

“Hey momma.� I said smiling to myself as I made myself comfortable on my couch. “How are you?�

“Oh I’m doing great. Just keeping busy with work.� My mom said, “It’s been a pretty crazy couple of days at the hospital.�

My mom’s name is Evelyn, but everyone calls her Eve. I of course call her momma. She’s a nurse at the hospital in Memphis, and she loves every minute of it. She’s the same age as Lynn. They graduated together a long with Trace’s mother. That would explain why the three of us are so close. My mom is the only one of the three that isn’t nor has she been married. My father was her high school sweetheart. She was deeply in love with him. They lasted for a while after high school, but when she turned twenty one she got pregnant with me. She was going through nursing school at the time, and apparently a wife in kid wasn’t in my father’s agenda. He left her shortly after I was born and hasn’t been back since. She had a few serious boyfriends that I can remember throughout my childhood, but none of them wanted the whole package. They always wanted her, and I never seemed to fit into the picture. But momma always chose me.

“How about you? I haven’t talked to you in a couple of days. I called yesterday, and Kelly said you were sick? Are you feeling better?�

“Yeah, I little bit. That’s kind of the reason why I was calling.�

“Oh? Honey, you don’t have something bad do you?�

“No, mom I don’t. Well, I guess that depends on how you look at it.� I said more to myself than her.

“Honey, you don’t have an STD or anything?�

“Mom! God, no! No STDs.� I said shaking my head. Like Justin and Lynn, my mother and I have a similar relationship. I can tell her anything, but sometimes I just like to keep things to myself. I would like to keep this one to myself, but that would just about near impossible. Especially, when I have to explain to her HOW I got pregnant. Yeah, that’s going to throw her for a loop. But she loves Justin, so hopefully it’ll all be good.
“Then what is it?�

“Are you sitting down?�

I heard her pause for a second on the phone, “I am now.�

“Ok, well the reason why I’ve been sick is because…well I found out today that…I’m, uh…pregnant.� I said waiting for her response.

“You’re pregnant?�

“Yes.�

“Wow. I wasn’t expecting this.� She said. I could see her expression on her face, and leaning back against the couch looking up at the ceiling in our living room. “You’re sure?�

“Yeah I went to the doctor today. I’m a month along.� There was a long pause, “Mom you’re not mad or anything are you?� I asked becoming worried.

“No, no, honey. I’m just trying to take this all in.� she said. I could hear the reassuring tone in her voice. “I’m to young to be a grandma. I still have a few years ahead of me.�

I smiled at my mom’s joke, “I know, I know.�

“So do you know who the father is?�

“Are you still sitting down?�

“Yep.� I was about to tell her when her heard her go to say something again, “Do I want to know?�

“I guess so. It’s no one horrible.� I paused for a second before continuing, “It’s…It’s Justin.�

“Justin?� she asked surprised.

“Yes.�

“Justin, as in Justin Randall Timberlake.�

“That’s the one.�

Again, I could picture the expression on my mothers face, “What? How? You guys aren’t even dating, or are you?� I could hear the hopefulness in her voice. She has always wanted Justin and I to end up together, but our relationship has never been anything of the sort. Well, until now that is.

“No mom we aren’t.�

“Lorelei Nicole McBane!� I pulled the phone from my ear, and smiled, “I raised you better than that.�

“I know mom.�

“I’ve always told you to use protection if you’re going to do things of that sort!� I had to laugh at that. Only my mother. “Why didn’t you? Or did it not work? Because you know we can sue or something like that.�

“I don’t think did. I wish I could remember, but I cant.� I heard my mother gasp.

“Please tell me you’re joking.�

“I’m not.�

“So you were drunk?�

“Yes, the only thing I remember is getting up to go pee, and just was trying to help me but he was just as drunk as I was, and he tripped and brought me down with him. We were laughing, and then boom we kissed. That’s all I remember. I barely remember Trace dragging us out of the club.�

“Wow.�

“Are you mad?� I asked.

“No, I guess not.�

“Disappointed?�

“Honey, everything happens for a reason. It’s not my place to judge you, besides you’re my daughter you could never do no wrong in my eyes.�

I smiled, “Thanks mom.�

“Your welcome. So, have you told Justin yet?�

“Yeah, I told him just a few hours ago.�

“You know Lynn is there right? She left yesterday evening.�

“Yeah, I saw her before I left Justin’s. He’s probably telling her as we speak.�

“You’re not scared are you? Because you know she’ll just be shocked at first, you have nothing to worry about. She loves you just as much as I love you.�

“I know.�

“Well listen honey my supper is about to burn. I completely forgot all about it with all this baby talk. I’ll call you first thing tomorrow ok?�

“Alright mom.�

“I love you honey. Everything’s going to be alright. I’ll help you any way I can.�

“Thanks mom. I love you too.�

“Bye honey.�

“Bye mom.� I said as I hung up the phone and put it back in it’s cradle. Well, that’s three weights lifted off my chest. Now for the fourth one. I grabbed my cell phone and dialed Justin’s number.



Two hours later I found myself sitting beside Justin on his couch. Talk about weird. We have never had any conversations where we just didn’t know what to say. It seemed like we were both avoiding the topic at hand. I mean what do you say? It would be something totally different if Justin and I were madly in love with each other, and were excited about the baby. But we’re not. I am excited about the baby though, and I can tell Justin is too. I just think once we get it out in the open everything will be better. At least I hope so.

“Do you need anything?� Justin asked for the millionth time.

“No, I’m fine.� I said rolling my eyes. This was really getting annoying. I mean I know he means well and all, but DAMN! I am pregnant, not paralyzed. “This is really weird. We have a lot to talk about I know, but all of it isn’t the greatest conversation starters.�

I saw Justin smile, “I know. Well what do you talk about when someone is pregnant?�

I smiled and turned to face him on the couch, “I guess we talk about how we’re going to handle this. Living situations, work, etc.�

“Do you want to continue working? Should I start looking for a replacement?�

“No, no. That’s the last thing that I want to do is stop working. Well until I absolutely have to. My job is the only thing that keeps me from going stir crazy. I could barely handle the half a day when you sent me home. There’s only so much TV you can watch before you get bored with it.�

Justin laughed, “Ok, then we’ll take care of that later.� He turned to face me better on the couch, “I was thinking earlier. I mean you don’t have to do it, but I was just thinking it might make things easier if maybe you moved in with me?�

“Here?�

“Yeah. I mean you practically live here anyway. Plus, Kelly sometimes works odd hours what if something happens and you’re the only one there?�

Ok, I had to give him props on that one. Kelly does work Satan’s hours where she works. “You got a point. But I like my apartment.� I whined.

“I know, but I would feel a lot better. I promised you I would be there for everything. How can I do that when your four blocks away?� he said with a smile. Do you ever notice how charming this man is? I’m his best friend. I should know ways to get past this…but I don’t. Nope, after twenty odd years of friendship, I have not mastered the art of ignoring the Timberlake Charm.

“Why can’t you move in with me?�

“Are you serious?�

“Yes. Why not?�

“Lori, have you seen how small your apartment is?�

“It’s not small.� I said defensively. Ok, so maybe it was a little small. But still.

“Lori, your apartment was not meant to hold three adults and a baby.�

Holy shit. I hadn’t thought of that. Where would I live after the baby was born? My apartment was only big enough to hold me and Kelly. Damn it. I guess I should really start searching.

I leaned my head back against the couch in frustration. “I didn’t think about that. What am I going to do? I have to find a good apartment before the baby is born.�

“Hello? Have you not been listening to me? I have more than enough room here.�

“I know that, but I couldn’t do that to you.�

“Yes, you could. I promise it’ll be fine. Besides, don’t you think I should have a say in this too?�

“I guess.� I said rolling my eyes sarcastically. “Since you got me into this mess.�

Justin laughed, “You can stay for as long as you want too. There’s no rush. I’ll help you look for apartments, and all that jazz.�

“Well since you practically begged me, I guess I’ll stay here.�

“I do not beg.�

He wasn’t serious? Do I have to record him and prove it to him? If he doesn’t get his way he immediately turns into a five year old until he gets what he wants.

I patted him on the leg, and stood up, “If you keep telling yourself that. It might come true someday.� I began to walk into the kitchen, and was met by Lynn coming in the door. She looked at me, and couldn’t hide the huge smile that she had working up on her face.

“So that’s why you gained three pounds? Oh honey, I’m so excited.� Lynn said as she placed her purse on the counter, and grabbed my hands.

“You’re not mad?�

“Honey why would I be mad?�

“I figured you would be mad that I took advantage of your son.� I said jokingly.

“Honey, I know my son. If anyone was taking advantage it was him.� She said kissing me on the cheek.

“I heard that!� We heard Justin call from the living room. Lynn and I both rolled our eyes. The doorbell rang, and we heard Trace’s voice enter the house. Oh joy.

“I do have to say that I was shocked at first, but then the thought of having a grandbaby…I’m just so excited!� she said as she walked to the cupboard and grabbed a glass. “Do you want anything to drink?�

“No, I’m fine.�

“Ok. I called your mom a few minutes ago. She’s just as excited as I am. You have to let us go shopping with you. It’s so much fun.�

With all this talk I was starting to get excited myself. My hand immediately came to rest on my stomach. I wasn’t showing at all yet, but still. It was just hard to believe that something was growing inside of me.

“It’s amazing isn’t it?�

My head jerked up to look at Lynn, “What?�

“I just saw you put your hand on your stomach. It’s amazing isn’t? How there’s nothing showing yet, but just knowing that it’s there…it’s an indescribable feeling.�

“It is.�

“So what do you want? A boy or girl?�

“I don’t know. I haven’t really thought about that yet.�

“Well either way I’ll be happy.� Lynn said sitting next to me.

Tell me again why I was so scared of telling everyone? Well I guess that’s normal huh? That’s a pretty big bomb to drop on people. Especially one’s that didn’t have any idea what was going on. Speaking of I wonder if Trace knows?

“So how’s the bun?� Trace asked as he wrapped me in a hug. I hugged him back.

“How did you know?� I asked him as he placed a kiss on my cheek.

“I’m not exactly an outsider ya know. Who do you think Justin told the next morning when I dropped you guys off?�

Oh yeah. I kind of forgot that for a while.

“You know I’m actually hurt that you didn’t tell me.�

“Whatever.� I said rolling my eyes I smiled. You know I’m noticing I roll my eyes a lot. I better watch out they might get stuck that way. Boy wouldn’t that be attractive?

Well, I guess the hardest part is over. Now we just have the next nine months to endure. Is it bad that I’m excited about looking like a beached whale?

: 3 Months Later:
November

Its taken three months but I think that I have finally gotten adjusted to this whole…thing. I guess that’s what you can call it. And to tell you the truth I am BEYOND excited about this. So I guess I should tell you how everything’s been going for the past three months. Justin has been very supportive. He hasn’t missed a doctor’s appointment yet. In fact we have an appointment today at twelve, and we get to find out the sex of the baby. Isn’t that exciting? I still can’t believe I am five months a long now. Crazy, huh? It feels like yesterday when I found out. Anyway, back to what I was talking about. Justin has been amazing. Work is kind of crazy since Justin dropped his album in September, but of course no one is letting me do too much. I mean I can still see my feet for crying out loud! Trace and I pretty much split up the PA responsibilities. I make sure that Justin gets up on time, has all his shit scheduled, makes sure that he gets to where he needs to be, and that he has everything that he needs. And Trace, well he gets to do all the fun stuff. Like go with him to his public appearances to make sure everything goes smoothly, but you and I both know he goes simply to have fun. But that’s dear old Trace for you. This month has been especially crazy with Thanksgiving just a week away, and having to schedule all his meetings, and public appearances around doctor appointments, which he says is more important than anything, and our trip back to Tennessee.

I stood in front of my full length mirror, and untied my robe. I had just gotten out of the shower. I turned to the side and looked at myself. It was amazing how much my stomach had grown. Not to mention what this had done to my boobs. They were much bigger now. I placed my hand on my stomach and rubbed it gently, “Hey in there. I’m your mommy. I can’t wait to see you.�

My head jerked up when I heard someone outside my door. I pulled my robe back around my body. For all I knew some weird person could be there, and they’d open the door and get an eyeful.

“Hey Lor. I’m home.�

I sighed when I heard Justin call from outside my door. He had a meeting with Johnny this morning about his upcoming tour, so I’m guessing he just got back.

“Ok.� I said pulling my big white terrycloth robe tighter around me to make sure everything was secure. I pulled open the door and smiled at him, “Do you still want to go with me to the doctor today?� I asked as he walked into my room

Justin just looked at me as if I was insane as he sat on my bed. “That’s the whole reason why I had you schedule that meeting this morning. Of course I want to go with you. We get to find out the sex today right?� He asked making himself comfortable.

I unwrapped my towel that I had my hair wrapped up in and let my wet hair fall around my shoulders. I couldn’t hold back my excitement, and immediately busted out in a smile, “Yes. I seriously can’t wait. Do you know what this means after we find out?� I said as I plopped down beside him on my bed. This pregnancy has brought us closer if that’s at all possible, and to tell you the truth I’m kind of glad it happened. I couldn’t imagine going through this with anyone but Justin.

Justin smiled, “It makes it more real. We get to decide on a name, work on a nursery, plan baby showers.�

Ok my cheeks were starting to hurt from all the smiling I was doing, but I just couldn’t help it. I laid down beside him, and he wrapped his arm around my shoulders. He placed his other hand on my constantly growing stomach. I wasn’t very big, but you could definitely tell I was pregnant. Next month I think I’ll be saying bye to my feet for a while. He started talking to my stomach way back when I had a bump, and at first it was really awkward, but adorable all at the same time. Now though I’ve adjusted to it, and I love it. He’s really embraced this better than I thought he would. Although, I still feel like a huge obligation. But he assures me otherwise.

“You’re getting bigger.� He said looking up at me.

I rolled my eyes, “By the day.� I said as I rolled over onto my back, “When I lay this way I can just see the tips of my toes. So, I figure by next week I won’t be able to see my feet.� I said smiling up at him as I wiggled my toes.

“I think pregnancy looks good on you.� He said. Ok, that was totally random. What? Was he trying to say that I look beautiful pregnant? Was the man blind?

“Are you sure you don’t need glasses? I’ve always said you do, because you squint way too much when you read stuff.�

He laughed, “No I don’t need glasses. I mean I’m not saying that you weren’t beautiful before because you were. But there’s something about you now, you just look different.�

“Maybe it’s the extra god knows how many pounds that I have recently gained.�

“You don’t look fat Lori. You look pregnant. When people look at you they can tell your pregnant, and not have to ask.�

“Really?�

“Really. I’m not just saying that either.�

I knew that. I could always count on Trace and him to be honest with me when it came to that sort of thing. They knew that I really wanted an honest opinion if I asked if a dress made me look fat. They knew there wasn’t some hidden answer that they had to say, and they knew that I wouldn’t blow up on them if indeed the dress made me look fat. I just needed some reassurance every now and then.

I sat up and got up off the bed, but I turned back to look at him, “Thanks. I really needed that.�

He smiled at me, and got up himself. He knew I needed to finish getting ready. He walked over to me, and placed a kiss on my cheek. “That’s what I’m here for. Just doing my job.�



At 12:15 I was already on the exam table waiting on the doctor for my ultrasound. I turned my head to the side, and saw Justin staring off into space in the chair beside me. His leg was bouncing down uncontrollably. “Nervous?� I asked him. But it was obvious he was.

“Just a little anxious.� He said smiling as he leaned forward, and took my hand in his. Well, I didn’t care if he was too scared to admit or not. I was nervous. I guess he could see that I was because he began to rub his thumb against my knuckles. It actually helped. I guess he was pretty good at this.

“What do you want?� I asked. We had never really talked about before. I mean sure we talked about what would happen if we had a girl or a boy, but we never said exactly what we wanted.

“Honestly? I really don’t know. I mean either would be perfect.�

I smiled, “You don’t secretly want a boy?�

“Well kind of.� He said sheepishly. I knew it. “But I kind of like the idea of spoiling a little girl to death.�

I was about to say something else, but I was interrupted by Dr. Spencer coming in. In the past five months we’ve become well acquainted. I, well more like Justin, had to make sure that we could trust her. We both don’t feel comfortable about the press knowing about the baby yet, and she completely understands that. To which we were both grateful. And I of course felt more comfortable because she was a woman.

“Hello Lori. Justin.� She said sitting down on her stool. She looked over some papers for a bit, and then turned to us with a smile, “So are you ready to find out the sex of this baby?�

We both answered at the same time, “Yes.� Then of course we laughed at the same time. Total cliché I know, but who cares?

“So is there a certain sex you’re hoping for?� she asked as she put on the latex gloves, and sat back down in the stool. She wheeled over to us, and got up to prep the machine.

“I’m honestly happy with either.� I said as I pulled my shirt up for her to do the gel thing.

“What about you Justin?� she asked as she rubbed that gel stuff on my stomach. I honestly don’t know what it’s called.

“I’m kind of hoping for a boy, but I’d be completely happy with a girl.� He said smiling over at Lori.

Dr. Spencer grabbed the (AN: Ok forgive me I have no idea what this thing is called! If one of you guys know tell me and I’ll put it there. But for now…thing is gonna have to do! LMAO. Ok back to the story!) thing, “Well let’s find out shall we?�

I gripped Justin’s hand a little tighter, and he squeezed back reassuring me without words that everything was going to be fine. She started pushing the thing around on my stomach, “Heart beat sounds strong. Everything looks good so far.� She positioned the thing (AN: Again I am so sorry for this!) on a different part of my stomach, “Let me see if I can get the baby in a better position so we can see what we’re looking for here.� She said watching the screen. I turned my head to look at Justin, and he smiled at me.

“I got it!� I heard her say in excitement, and my head immediately turned toward the sonogram, “It’s a girl!�

“What about Melanie?� Justin asked as he looked down to where I was lying beside him on my bed. On the way home from the doctor we stopped and bought every name book that we could find. I guess that might have been pointless to do considering they were probably all the same in there anyway, but who cares right? I smiled, and rubbed my stomach. I’ve gotten in the habit of doing that lately.

“I like it, but I want something original.�

“Well Melanie isn’t that popular much anymore.�

“We’ll put it on the maybe list.� I said grabbing the book out of his hands.

“Hey I was looking at that.� He said trying to grab it back from me, but I moved out of his grasp.

“You’ve been looking at ever since we got home. When’s it gonna be my turn?�

“How about when I’m done?� he said trying to grab it again. I pushed him back over on the other side, and got up at quick as I could. He started to go after me, but stopped when we heard the doorbell.

“You’re saved by the bell my friend.� He said pointing his finger at me from where I had my head sticking out of my bathroom that was connected to my room. He winked at me as he walked out of my room to answer the door. I heard the doorbell ring once more, and then a few minutes later the sounds of a female voice enter the house.

Oh yeah with all the baby excitement I forgot to mention that Justin had a new…well, to tell you the truth for once I don’t know what this girl is to him. I wouldn’t say that they’re boyfriend girlfriend but you know they’re more than just friends. Well I was just friends with him and look where that got me. I rolled my eyes and plopped back down on my bed.

Ok I’m not jealous, but there’s just something about that girl that I don’t like. Maybe it’s because I get the vibe that she doesn’t really care for me either. Oh, her name is Michelle. I don’t know how they met, nor do I really care. That sounded bitter didn’t it? I placed the baby book on my stomach when I heard someone knock on my door, and then enter.

“Hey, I know we sort of had plans tonight, but can I rain check? I forgot that I promised Michelle that I would have dinner with her tonight.� I heard Justin say as he sat down by on the bed.

Would you read too much into it if I said I felt a tiny pang of jealousy rip through me?

“Uh, sure, go ahead.� I said smiling.

“Are you sure? I can cancel if you want me too.�

“No, Justin, go. You already had plans with her, and I don’t want you breaking things off with her for me.�

“Lor, you need me more than she does.�

Well, at least I knew where I stood when it came to me and her. Would it be bad if I liked it just a teensy bit to much that I knew that I had the upper hand when it came to her?

“Justin, I’ll be perfectly fine. Go.� I said picking the book back up again, and focused my attention on it. This time he was the one to grab it from me. “Hey!�

“Pay backs suck don’t they?� He said shoving the book into this back pocket, “Seriously though…you know what I’m just going to tell her that I can’t. You need me.� He said on his back to my door.

“Justin! No, come on. It would be rude of you to do that her.� Not that I really cared.

“Honestly what good would I be to her anyway when I know that I left a pregnant woman at home all alone? I would be worried about you the whole time.�

“Would it make you feel any better if I asked someone to come over?� I said. Was it just me or was he looking for ways to get out of this date?

I could see that would have really preferred to stay home, “I would really rather I do it so I know for sure you’re ok.�

I grabbed my cell phone, “I’ll just call Kelly and ask her to come over. We haven’t hung out in a while, and I kind of miss her.�

He smiled despite the look on his face. You know I would almost say that he dreaded going on this date. Poor girl, “I guess I could live with that.�

I pulled her number up on my contact list and pressed the dial button, “Now you go and have fun. I’m sure you’ll have fun with a skinny girl then one who looks like a beached whale.�

“Lori, you don’t…�

“GO! Now, before I throw something at you. Go have fun, in fact have it for the both of us.� I said smiling at him.

He walked back over to me and kissed me on my cheek the leaned down and kissed my stomach, “I’ll be back.�

Ok of all the times that he has kissed my cheek I have never felt what I just did. Have we just been spending too much time together, because I could have just sworn to you that I felt...butterflies? No, no way. I really am going crazy! You know it’s these damn hormones that are making me feel this way!

I laughed; you know one of those laughs where you’re just too nervous to do anything else? Yeah one of those. “I promise we’re not going anywhere.� I was startled by hearing Kelly’s voice pick up the phone, “Hey it’s me hold on a sec.�

“I’ll call you and tell you when we’re on our way home.�

“If you make it home.� I said with a playful wink.

“Trust me, I’ll make it home.� Justin looked at me concerned, “Are you feeling ok? You look a little flushed.�

There goes that nervous laugh again, “No, no, I’m fine. Probably just a little…is it hot in here?� I said fanning myself. Damn this blushing shit. I haven’t blushed since like…hell I don’t even remember when!

“Babe, it’s the middle of November.� He said laughing at me.

“It’s still LA.�

“And it gets cold at night, especially during the winter.�

“Well I’m hot.�

“You’re crazy.� He said kissing me on the cheek again, “I’ll be back, promise.� He said as he walked toward my door. He stole one more smile at me, and then closed it behind him.

Oh, I’m officially losing my mind. I snapped out of my daze when I head Kelly’s voice coming from my phone that I hadn’t realized was still up to my ear.

“Shit. Sorry Kel. I didn’t mean to keep you waiting for so long.�

I heard her laugh, “It’s fine. So, what’s up?�

“Are you busy?�

“Nope just got a date with my couch, and Dr. McDreamy. Why? What’s going on?�

“Do you mind bringing the Dr. McDreamy party over here, because I really need some girl time?� I said hoping I didn’t sound too desperate. “Plus Justin has a date tonight and he doesn’t want me at home by myself. He offered to ditch her, but I decided I could really use some me and you time.� I said hoping she said yes, because I really needed to talk to someone about this, and she was my only hope. I couldn’t talk to Justin for obvious reason, and definitely not telling Trace because I would just be better off telling Justin. Little shit couldn’t keep his mouth closed if his life depended on it.

“Sure. McDreamy is much better if you talk about him with someone who appreciates his beauty. I don’t think Cuddles likes McDreamy. I think she’s more of a McSteamy chick.� Kelly said referring to her 5 year old cat.

“What an outrage.� I said laughing.

“I know I’m thinking about disowning her.� Yeah that would never happen. “So, I’ll be over in say, 10?�

“Yeah, hey can you do me a huge favor?�

“What’s that?�

“Can you get us some ice cream on your way over? I’ll pay you back and everything.�

“That serious huh?�

“What?�

“You call me up for girl time, and then you ask me for ice cream. Ice cream and girl time calls for something major. When’s the last time we have had girl time and ice cream and it not being about a guy?�

“Uh…�

“Exactly. I’ll be there in a little bit. Toodles.�

If she could read me over the phone and she’s only known me since we were in college, imagine how Justin could read me when we stand face to face. Oh shit. Shit, shit, shit, and more shit.



“So since our hour date with McDreamy is over. Spill.� Kelly said turning to me on the couch. She shoved the spoon of ice cream into her mouth, and smiled raising her eyebrows.

“It’s weird, really, really, weird.�

“Something going on with you and Justin?�

“How did you know?�

Kelly laughed, “It’s only obvious. I can tell you’re having boy trouble, and the only boy that you’ve been around long enough is Justin.�

“Am I that readable?�

“Sort of, but don’t worry guys are dumb when it comes to this sort of thing. So he’s probably just writing it off as some weird side effect of your wacked out hormones.�

“It’s nothing really, but I have a feeling it may grow into something bigger.� I said shoving the pleasant coldness of my Chocolate Chip Cookie Dough Ice Cream into my mouth.

“Explain.�

“Well it’s all started with all this baby stuff. I mean he’s been so…amazing through it all. Then he gets this new girl…thing. I don’t even know what to label her as. And I start to feel…jealous. I was never this way before with any other girl that he ever dated. I mean yeah I cared and all that jazz, but it was because I was concerned with whether he was going to get hurt again, and I was always on guard, but never jealous.�

“You think you’re jealous of this girl?�

“Well, yeah. Like take tonight for instance, he said we were going to hang out all night and pick out names for the baby…by the way it’s a girl.�

“A girl? Oh yay! I’m so excited.� She said leaning over to give me a congratulatory hug. “Ok now go on.�

“Well we were kidding around with each other, and then the doorbell rang, and it was her. I didn’t really care at first; I just thought she was going to be here for a few minutes or so and then leave. But he comes up and tells me that he forgot he had plans, and was wondering if it was ok if he went. I told him it was perfectly fine, but that little twinge came up like she was stepping in on my territory and I didn’t like it.�

“He wasn’t just making up the fact that he had made plans with her before to just go out with her was he?�

“No, no, he honestly forgot. He felt really bad, and offered to ditch HER and stay with me. But I told him that would be really rude, and convinced him that I would call you. Hence one of the main reasons you’re here.�

“Thanks for making feel like a babysitter. Here I thought you honestly just missed me.� She said jokingly.

“I do miss you.� I said smiling as I grabbed her hand. “You have no idea how much this means to me that I have everyone’s support in all this, plus I can talk to you about things that I can’t with Tweedle Dumb and Tweedle Dumb Ass.�

“Well that’s what friends are for right?� She said smiling at me, “So back to the point at hand. Continue.�

“Then before he left after I assured him everything would be fine, he did something that he normally does before he leaves to go anywhere. He kisses me on the cheek, and then kisses my belly.�

I looked over and saw her blissfully looking into the air, “That’s so sweet.�

I rolled my eyes, “Anyway, he kisses me on the cheek, and for some reason, it just felt…different.�

“You felt something different in a kiss on the cheek?�

“Well, yeah. I did.� I said defensively.

“Lori, I think you’re just running from the obvious.�

“And what’s that?�

“You’re starting to develop feelings for the guy.� She said as she put both her feet on the ground, and put her empty pint of ice cream on the table. “And there’s no reason why you shouldn’t. He’s a pretty awesome guy. Not to mention extremely gorgeous.� She said fanning her hand in front of her face. Then she turned to face me again, and grabbed my hand, “And he’s the father of your baby.�

I was going to say something, but our attention was turned away to the garage door opening and the sound of a car engine turning off. “Speaking of yo baby daddy.�

I hit her on the arm, “Shut up! Do you have any idea how bad that sounded?�

“What? It’s the truth!�

“That just sounded…wrong!�

I heard the sound of the door open, and then shut, “Lor?�

“In here.� I called leading him into the living room.

“Hello ladies.� He said placing a kiss on our heads. “Did you have fun gossiping?�

“We did nothing of the sort.� I said smiling as he sat on the chair opposite the couch.

“Sure. You left evidence.�

“What evidence?�

He picked up an ice cream container, “This.�
I looked over at Kelly. Didn’t she just say that guys don’t pick up on that kind of thing? She caught on to my look, “It’s just ice cream.� She said looking back at me.

“Yeah ice cream, two women, and weird looks being passed between them. But I know you women like to have your little secrets so…whatever.� He said not hiding the smile that was beginning to play on his face. Then he stood back up, “I’m going to go take a shower. So if you ladies will excuse me.� He said turning toward the staircase then turning back around, “Oh Kel thanks for coming over and staying with Lori for me.�

Kelly smiled. It was sort of a nervous one, but hey a smile none the less. “No problem.� He smiled at her and then walked back up the stairs.

“He has a killer smile.�

I threw a pillow at her, “I thought you said men don’t pick up on this stuff.�

“I said boys not men.� She said trying to lighten the mood.

“Whatever! Who cares? I don’t need him reading into my, what I think might be, feelings for him right now. My god I’m about to go insane just thinking about it. It’s the last thing I need right now.� I said standing up. I grabbed our empty cartons and began to carry them into the kitchen. Well more like waddled them into the kitchen. It was something that I recently developed. So sue me?

I heard Kelly sigh, and get up from her spot on the couch. I threw the cartons in the trash away, and began to work on the dishes that were left in the sink. I threw open the dishwasher, and began to put the dishes in there. Well, ok, more like slammed them. I was in a mood. I recently developed that too.

“Is it so bad that you have feelings for him?�

I abruptly turned around still tightly gripping the glass in my hand, “YES!� I took a few deep breaths and calmed down then continued, “Yes it’s bad when the person that you have feelings for is your best friend.�

“He’s also your baby’s father. That has to say something.�

“What does it say? It says I was drunk and slept with my best friend. That’s what it says.�

“What if there was something there that was just brought out more when you were drunk.� She leaned against the counter and crossed her arms, “We all know you have an evil side, but that side never rears its head until your drunk or in traffic or haven’t had your coffee in the morning.�

“Your point?� I asked turning back to the dishes and the dishwasher.

“My point is even when you’re drunk you just don’t up and sleep with your best friend.� She sighed, “But then again I could be wrong. I’ve always thought that you two would make a great couple, and maybe that’s clouding my mind. But seriously there’s something there between you two that obviously neither one of you can see. It’s not wrong to have these feelings for him. It was bound to happen sooner or later.�

“I’m sorry. I just freaked out that maybe he could read me.�

“Maybe that wouldn’t be such a bad thing?�

“I don’t know. With the pregnancy, thanksgiving, excitement of finding out that I’m having a girl, and these…whatever the hell they are, has got me a little confused and frustrated.�

“I understand.� Then she gave me a smile, “Congratulations on the baby girl.�

“Thanks.�

“I think I’m gonna go now that baby daddy is home.� She said giving me a hug.

I returned it and walked with her toward the door. She grabbed her keys and her purse off the entrance table, and turned back to me, “A little advice?�

I smiled, “What’s that?�


�Don’t ignore these feelings. Don’t try to push them away. Let it happen. Don’t’ be afraid. You might be surprised you might find what you’re looking for.� She said as she turned the door knob.

“Thanks.�

“No problem.� She said as she walked out. I stood there until her car was out of sight then I closed the door behind me.

Maybe she was right.

“What about Melanie?� Justin asked as he looked down to where I was lying beside him on my bed. On the way home from the doctor we stopped and bought every name book that we could find. I guess that might have been pointless to do considering they were probably all the same in there anyway, but who cares right? I smiled, and rubbed my stomach. I’ve gotten in the habit of doing that lately.

“I like it, but I want something original.�

“Well Melanie isn’t that popular much anymore.�

“We’ll put it on the maybe list.� I said grabbing the book out of his hands.

“Hey I was looking at that.� He said trying to grab it back from me, but I moved out of his grasp.

“You’ve been looking at ever since we got home. When’s it gonna be my turn?�

“How about when I’m done?� he said trying to grab it again. I pushed him back over on the other side, and got up at quick as I could. He started to go after me, but stopped when we heard the doorbell.

“You’re saved by the bell my friend.� He said pointing his finger at me from where I had my head sticking out of my bathroom that was connected to my room. He winked at me as he walked out of my room to answer the door. I heard the doorbell ring once more, and then a few minutes later the sounds of a female voice enter the house.

Oh yeah with all the baby excitement I forgot to mention that Justin had a new…well, to tell you the truth for once I don’t know what this girl is to him. I wouldn’t say that they’re boyfriend girlfriend but you know they’re more than just friends. Well I was just friends with him and look where that got me. I rolled my eyes and plopped back down on my bed.

Ok I’m not jealous, but there’s just something about that girl that I don’t like. Maybe it’s because I get the vibe that she doesn’t really care for me either. Oh, her name is Michelle. I don’t know how they met, nor do I really care. That sounded bitter didn’t it? I placed the baby book on my stomach when I heard someone knock on my door, and then enter.

“Hey, I know we sort of had plans tonight, but can I rain check? I forgot that I promised Michelle that I would have dinner with her tonight.� I heard Justin say as he sat down by on the bed.

Would you read too much into it if I said I felt a tiny pang of jealousy rip through me?

“Uh, sure, go ahead.� I said smiling.

“Are you sure? I can cancel if you want me too.�

“No, Justin, go. You already had plans with her, and I don’t want you breaking things off with her for me.�

“Lor, you need me more than she does.�

Well, at least I knew where I stood when it came to me and her. Would it be bad if I liked it just a teensy bit to much that I knew that I had the upper hand when it came to her?

“Justin, I’ll be perfectly fine. Go.� I said picking the book back up again, and focused my attention on it. This time he was the one to grab it from me. “Hey!�

“Pay backs suck don’t they?� He said shoving the book into this back pocket, “Seriously though…you know what I’m just going to tell her that I can’t. You need me.� He said on his back to my door.

“Justin! No, come on. It would be rude of you to do that her.� Not that I really cared.

“Honestly what good would I be to her anyway when I know that I left a pregnant woman at home all alone? I would be worried about you the whole time.�

“Would it make you feel any better if I asked someone to come over?� I said. Was it just me or was he looking for ways to get out of this date?

I could see that would have really preferred to stay home, “I would really rather I do it so I know for sure you’re ok.�

I grabbed my cell phone, “I’ll just call Kelly and ask her to come over. We haven’t hung out in a while, and I kind of miss her.�

He smiled despite the look on his face. You know I would almost say that he dreaded going on this date. Poor girl, “I guess I could live with that.�

I pulled her number up on my contact list and pressed the dial button, “Now you go and have fun. I’m sure you’ll have fun with a skinny girl then one who looks like a beached whale.�

“Lori, you don’t…�

“GO! Now, before I throw something at you. Go have fun, in fact have it for the both of us.� I said smiling at him.

He walked back over to me and kissed me on my cheek the leaned down and kissed my stomach, “I’ll be back.�

Ok of all the times that he has kissed my cheek I have never felt what I just did. Have we just been spending too much time together, because I could have just sworn to you that I felt...butterflies? No, no way. I really am going crazy! You know it’s these damn hormones that are making me feel this way!

I laughed; you know one of those laughs where you’re just too nervous to do anything else? Yeah one of those. “I promise we’re not going anywhere.� I was startled by hearing Kelly’s voice pick up the phone, “Hey it’s me hold on a sec.�

“I’ll call you and tell you when we’re on our way home.�

“If you make it home.� I said with a playful wink.

“Trust me, I’ll make it home.� Justin looked at me concerned, “Are you feeling ok? You look a little flushed.�

There goes that nervous laugh again, “No, no, I’m fine. Probably just a little…is it hot in here?� I said fanning myself. Damn this blushing shit. I haven’t blushed since like…hell I don’t even remember when!

“Babe, it’s the middle of November.� He said laughing at me.

“It’s still LA.�

“And it gets cold at night, especially during the winter.�

“Well I’m hot.�

“You’re crazy.� He said kissing me on the cheek again, “I’ll be back, promise.� He said as he walked toward my door. He stole one more smile at me, and then closed it behind him.

Oh, I’m officially losing my mind. I snapped out of my daze when I head Kelly’s voice coming from my phone that I hadn’t realized was still up to my ear.

“Shit. Sorry Kel. I didn’t mean to keep you waiting for so long.�

I heard her laugh, “It’s fine. So, what’s up?�

“Are you busy?�

“Nope just got a date with my couch, and Dr. McDreamy. Why? What’s going on?�

“Do you mind bringing the Dr. McDreamy party over here, because I really need some girl time?� I said hoping I didn’t sound too desperate. “Plus Justin has a date tonight and he doesn’t want me at home by myself. He offered to ditch her, but I decided I could really use some me and you time.� I said hoping she said yes, because I really needed to talk to someone about this, and she was my only hope. I couldn’t talk to Justin for obvious reason, and definitely not telling Trace because I would just be better off telling Justin. Little shit couldn’t keep his mouth closed if his life depended on it.

“Sure. McDreamy is much better if you talk about him with someone who appreciates his beauty. I don’t think Cuddles likes McDreamy. I think she’s more of a McSteamy chick.� Kelly said referring to her 5 year old cat.

“What an outrage.� I said laughing.

“I know I’m thinking about disowning her.� Yeah that would never happen. “So, I’ll be over in say, 10?�

“Yeah, hey can you do me a huge favor?�

“What’s that?�

“Can you get us some ice cream on your way over? I’ll pay you back and everything.�

“That serious huh?�

“What?�

“You call me up for girl time, and then you ask me for ice cream. Ice cream and girl time calls for something major. When’s the last time we have had girl time and ice cream and it not being about a guy?�

“Uh…�

“Exactly. I’ll be there in a little bit. Toodles.�

If she could read me over the phone and she’s only known me since we were in college, imagine how Justin could read me when we stand face to face. Oh shit. Shit, shit, shit, and more shit.



“So since our hour date with McDreamy is over. Spill.� Kelly said turning to me on the couch. She shoved the spoon of ice cream into her mouth, and smiled raising her eyebrows.

“It’s weird, really, really, weird.�

“Something going on with you and Justin?�

“How did you know?�

Kelly laughed, “It’s only obvious. I can tell you’re having boy trouble, and the only boy that you’ve been around long enough is Justin.�

“Am I that readable?�

“Sort of, but don’t worry guys are dumb when it comes to this sort of thing. So he’s probably just writing it off as some weird side effect of your wacked out hormones.�

“It’s nothing really, but I have a feeling it may grow into something bigger.� I said shoving the pleasant coldness of my Chocolate Chip Cookie Dough Ice Cream into my mouth.

“Explain.�

“Well it’s all started with all this baby stuff. I mean he’s been so…amazing through it all. Then he gets this new girl…thing. I don’t even know what to label her as. And I start to feel…jealous. I was never this way before with any other girl that he ever dated. I mean yeah I cared and all that jazz, but it was because I was concerned with whether he was going to get hurt again, and I was always on guard, but never jealous.�

“You think you’re jealous of this girl?�

“Well, yeah. Like take tonight for instance, he said we were going to hang out all night and pick out names for the baby…by the way it’s a girl.�

“A girl? Oh yay! I’m so excited.� She said leaning over to give me a congratulatory hug. “Ok now go on.�

“Well we were kidding around with each other, and then the doorbell rang, and it was her. I didn’t really care at first; I just thought she was going to be here for a few minutes or so and then leave. But he comes up and tells me that he forgot he had plans, and was wondering if it was ok if he went. I told him it was perfectly fine, but that little twinge came up like she was stepping in on my territory and I didn’t like it.�

“He wasn’t just making up the fact that he had made plans with her before to just go out with her was he?�

“No, no, he honestly forgot. He felt really bad, and offered to ditch HER and stay with me. But I told him that would be really rude, and convinced him that I would call you. Hence one of the main reasons you’re here.�

“Thanks for making feel like a babysitter. Here I thought you honestly just missed me.� She said jokingly.

“I do miss you.� I said smiling as I grabbed her hand. “You have no idea how much this means to me that I have everyone’s support in all this, plus I can talk to you about things that I can’t with Tweedle Dumb and Tweedle Dumb Ass.�

“Well that’s what friends are for right?� She said smiling at me, “So back to the point at hand. Continue.�

“Then before he left after I assured him everything would be fine, he did something that he normally does before he leaves to go anywhere. He kisses me on the cheek, and then kisses my belly.�

I looked over and saw her blissfully looking into the air, “That’s so sweet.�

I rolled my eyes, “Anyway, he kisses me on the cheek, and for some reason, it just felt…different.�

“You felt something different in a kiss on the cheek?�

“Well, yeah. I did.� I said defensively.

“Lori, I think you’re just running from the obvious.�

“And what’s that?�

“You’re starting to develop feelings for the guy.� She said as she put both her feet on the ground, and put her empty pint of ice cream on the table. “And there’s no reason why you shouldn’t. He’s a pretty awesome guy. Not to mention extremely gorgeous.� She said fanning her hand in front of her face. Then she turned to face me again, and grabbed my hand, “And he’s the father of your baby.�

I was going to say something, but our attention was turned away to the garage door opening and the sound of a car engine turning off. “Speaking of yo baby daddy.�

I hit her on the arm, “Shut up! Do you have any idea how bad that sounded?�

“What? It’s the truth!�

“That just sounded…wrong!�

I heard the sound of the door open, and then shut, “Lor?�

“In here.� I called leading him into the living room.

“Hello ladies.� He said placing a kiss on our heads. “Did you have fun gossiping?�

“We did nothing of the sort.� I said smiling as he sat on the chair opposite the couch.

“Sure. You left evidence.�

“What evidence?�

He picked up an ice cream container, “This.�
I looked over at Kelly. Didn’t she just say that guys don’t pick up on that kind of thing? She caught on to my look, “It’s just ice cream.� She said looking back at me.

“Yeah ice cream, two women, and weird looks being passed between them. But I know you women like to have your little secrets so…whatever.� He said not hiding the smile that was beginning to play on his face. Then he stood back up, “I’m going to go take a shower. So if you ladies will excuse me.� He said turning toward the staircase then turning back around, “Oh Kel thanks for coming over and staying with Lori for me.�

Kelly smiled. It was sort of a nervous one, but hey a smile none the less. “No problem.� He smiled at her and then walked back up the stairs.

“He has a killer smile.�

I threw a pillow at her, “I thought you said men don’t pick up on this stuff.�

“I said boys not men.� She said trying to lighten the mood.

“Whatever! Who cares? I don’t need him reading into my, what I think might be, feelings for him right now. My god I’m about to go insane just thinking about it. It’s the last thing I need right now.� I said standing up. I grabbed our empty cartons and began to carry them into the kitchen. Well more like waddled them into the kitchen. It was something that I recently developed. So sue me?

I heard Kelly sigh, and get up from her spot on the couch. I threw the cartons in the trash away, and began to work on the dishes that were left in the sink. I threw open the dishwasher, and began to put the dishes in there. Well, ok, more like slammed them. I was in a mood. I recently developed that too.

“Is it so bad that you have feelings for him?�

I abruptly turned around still tightly gripping the glass in my hand, “YES!� I took a few deep breaths and calmed down then continued, “Yes it’s bad when the person that you have feelings for is your best friend.�

“He’s also your baby’s father. That has to say something.�

“What does it say? It says I was drunk and slept with my best friend. That’s what it says.�

“What if there was something there that was just brought out more when you were drunk.� She leaned against the counter and crossed her arms, “We all know you have an evil side, but that side never rears its head until your drunk or in traffic or haven’t had your coffee in the morning.�

“Your point?� I asked turning back to the dishes and the dishwasher.

“My point is even when you’re drunk you just don’t up and sleep with your best friend.� She sighed, “But then again I could be wrong. I’ve always thought that you two would make a great couple, and maybe that’s clouding my mind. But seriously there’s something there between you two that obviously neither one of you can see. It’s not wrong to have these feelings for him. It was bound to happen sooner or later.�

“I’m sorry. I just freaked out that maybe he could read me.�

“Maybe that wouldn’t be such a bad thing?�

“I don’t know. With the pregnancy, thanksgiving, excitement of finding out that I’m having a girl, and these…whatever the hell they are, has got me a little confused and frustrated.�

“I understand.� Then she gave me a smile, “Congratulations on the baby girl.�

“Thanks.�

“I think I’m gonna go now that baby daddy is home.� She said giving me a hug.

I returned it and walked with her toward the door. She grabbed her keys and her purse off the entrance table, and turned back to me, “A little advice?�

I smiled, “What’s that?�


�Don’t ignore these feelings. Don’t try to push them away. Let it happen. Don’t’ be afraid. You might be surprised you might find what you’re looking for.� She said as she turned the door knob.

“Thanks.�

“No problem.� She said as she walked out. I stood there until her car was out of sight then I closed the door behind me.

Maybe she was right.

Justin tied a towel around his waist, and grabbed a hand towel off the counter to wipe the steam off the mirror. He wiped a spot so he could see what he was doing, and just stood there. He sighed and grabbed his tooth brush.

“Get a grip.� He said to himself. The whole date, well, he didn’t think it went to well. And the thing that really drove him crazy? He didn’t care. He tried his best to get out of the date tonight to stay home with Lori, but she seemed real adamant about staying by herself. He was beginning to think that she was annoyed with him; maybe he should let her have more time to herself. Anyway the date started to go down hill when they sat down for dinner, and she noticed the baby name book that was in his back pocket.



“What’s that?� she asked as she unfolded her napkin and placed it in her lap.

“Oh, it’s a baby name book.� Justin said not even trying to hide the smile on his face.

“What are you doing with one of those?� She asked taking a sip of her water.

“Lori. It’s one of Lori’s. She’s pregnant you know.� As if the smile couldn’t get any bigger, it did. Both Lori and Justin had decided to keep it to themselves besides the obvious friends and family that she was carrying the next Timberlake generation. So, Michelle had no clue that the baby was Justin’s.

“You seem more excited about it than she is.� Michelle said trying to muster up a smile, but the only one that came across her face was a totally fake one. But Justin didn’t care.

“Well babies are exciting. She found out today she was having a girl.� Honestly he hated saying it like that. It made him feel like he was ashamed of this baby, and he wasn’t. He would shout if from rooftops if he knew that the press would leave both the baby and Lori alone. I guess it was a small price to pay for a child’s privacy.



So it started there, but naturally didn’t end there. The whole night the only thing that he could talk about was Lori. How Lori like this on the menu, how Lori couldn’t eat that because it made her throw up. Michelle’s a dancer, and he brought up how Lori used to dance when they were kids. Could he help it if he was worried about her?



“Do you want any desert?� Justin asked Michelle as he looked over the desert menu, “I think I’ll take Lori something home with me.�

Michelle threw her napkin down, “Ok, that’s enough.� She said standing up.

“Did I say something wrong?�

“Yes! This whole date all you’ve talked about is Lori. I’ve tried to make conversation, and eventually she comes back around.�

“I’m sorry I’ve just been worried about her at home by herself.�

“Doesn’t she have her own boyfriend? Isn’t that how she got the way she is in the first place?�

Ok, that really pissed Justin off, but he was willing to ignore it, “She doesn’t have a boyfriend. I offered to help her.�

“Oh so she’s mooching off of you?�

That one he wasn’t willing to let slide, “You don’t know the first thing about her!� He said standing up to face her. He looked around and saw that they were beginning to make a scene. “I think this date is over.� Justin said throwing down enough that would cover the meal and a tip. He shoved his wallet back into his pocket, and walked toward the door. He heard her huff, and follow after him.

Once they reached the parking lot she started up again, “I know she’s milking this for all it’s worth. She’s even got you feeling things for her. She’s a pretty smart girl if you ask me.�

He turned around and was practically fuming, “You don’t know what she’s been through, and the last thing that she’s doing is mooching off me! I’ve known her my entire life, and she works for me! She makes pretty damn good money on her own." Just threw his hands up in frustration, then pointed at her, "You know what? I don’t have to explain any of this to you. What I do with my life or what she does with hers is no concern of yours.� Justin said as he opened the door to his car. He slammed it shut, turned the ignition, and drove off leaving her standing by her own car.



Lori had been acting a little strange lately, but then again so had he. If he didn’t know any better he would say he was starting to develop feelings for her, but that was just crazy. They were best friends! Then again it’s not everyday your best friend has your baby. He was determined to make this thing work. The last thing that he wanted was things getting weird between him and Lori, and so far it worked. If anything this whole thing has brought them closer. He stood there for a few minutes longer and brushed his teeth, then rinsed his toothbrush and walked out to get dressed. He needed sleep that’s what he needed. He needed to clear his mind, and just…sleep. He dropped his towel, and grabbed the pair of boxers he had laying on his bed. Then threw back the covers and crawled into bed. And sleep is exactly what he did.



Justin got home about 9 o’clock which was exceptionally early for any date of his. Then Kelly left about nine thirty-ish. I went upstairs laid down on my bed, and I was out. Then 2:00 rolled around and I lost all hope of falling asleep again. This kid is a real kicker, no seriously I mean kicker. She could grow up and be a soccer player, and marry one of Beckham’s kids. Lucky her. If they looked anything like their father when they grow up…wow! That’s all I would have to say about that. That man had to fall from heaven, because he was just too damn pretty to come from this planet. I threw the covers off me, and began to get out of bed. I had to get some milk maybe that would make me sleep. I slowly made my way down the stairs. I had seen so many movies where the pregnant lady fell down the stairs that I was seriously afraid I was going to fall. Every time I went up and down them things I gripped the banister so tight my knuckles would turn white. I finally touched solid ground, and made my way faster to the kitchen. I switched on the light, and jumped when I saw Justin sitting at the counter in the dark.

“Shit. Do you always sit in dark kitchens trying to scare the hell out of pregnant women?�

“No just you.� He said with a smile, “I couldn’t sleep.�

“So you came down here to sit in the dark? Could you not manage to flip a switch?� I asked as I opened the fridge and grabbed the milk that I came down for.

“I figured if I turned on the light it would blind me, so I would make due with the little night light we have plugged in over here.�

“God forbid those blues go blind.� I said grabbing a glass out of the cupboard. I poured the white liquid into the glass, and returned the milk to the fridge. “So how’d the date go? You were back awfully early.� I said taking a sip.

“I doubt there’ll be another.� He said with a smile, “Apparently I talk about you too much.�

I paused with my milk halfway up to mouth then brought it back down, “What?�

“Yeah, she said I talk about you way too much. Then she started to throw around accusations that you were mooching off of me while you were staying here…� The rest of what he said sort of trailed off. Did he think that I was mooching? I mean he’s never said anything before, and I don’t think that I am, but what if he really thinks that I do mooch?

“You don’t think that I mooch of you do you?�

He looked at me like I was crazy, “Lori, you seriously can’t be asking me that question. Of course I don’t think that. I invited YOU to stay here, remember?� He got up from where he was sitting on the stool and walked over to me, “Besides, if you were mooching off me don’t you think you would have done it by now? Or I would have found out about it and kicked you to the curb?� he said smiling.

“I guess. But you know maybe I should seriously start looking for an apartment…�

“NO! Lori, seriously, no.�

“Justin if she thinks that then imagine what everyone else thinks?�

“Lori she didn’t even know you. Anyone who’s been around you for five minutes knows that you are completely incapable of doing things like that.� I could see on his face that a joke was about to come out of that mouth, “Besides, I think she was just jealous because you got to hit this and she didn’t.�

“Oh god!� I said as I hit him in the arm, “Get away.� I said laughing.

He laughed too, and pulled me into a hug. He placed a kiss on my head, and rested his chin on it, “What was that?� He asked as he pulled away. He obviously was feeling what woke me up in the first place.

“That would be your daughter the soccer player.� I said laughing.

“That was so cool.� He said putting his hand on my stomach hoping to feel it again.

“She’s gonna marry one of Beckham’s boys.� I said smiling.

“Like hell she is!�

“Come on the man is beautiful! Imagine what his kids will look like when they get older.�

“No, no, and no.� Justin said smiling, “The only man in her life will be me. At least until she’s 35.�

“Ha! Get real. That’ll never happen.�

“Like hell it will. I will keep her locked up, because if she’s anything like you were when we were teenagers she’ll come straight home from school into a room that has a lock outside the door, and no windows that she can escape out of.�

My mouth dropped, “What are you trying to say? I was not that bad.�

He looked at me like I was crazy again, “Do I need to remind you that your mother grounded you because she caught you almost getting it on with Jason Madden?�

Oh yeah. I conveniently forgot about that. Well until now. “That…that was…shut up!� I said hitting him in the arm again.

“And what about the time she grounded you because you got caught making out with Blake Adams in the boy’s locker room?� I was about to say something else, “Then you got double grounded because I came home for a while and you snuck out to go play basketball with me and Trace.�

“Do we have to relive my past?�

“Oh I think we do.�

“Well what about you? Your mom caught you actually GETTING it on. Remember that?�

“I was 17 thank you. I was much older than your 16.�

“Only by a year! You almost didn’t get to go on tour that summer because she grounded you so bad.�

“Well I had a little help in that strict grounding.�

“I did not force you to sneak out to go to that dance with me.�

“Yes, but how could I resist? You were so sad because nobody asked you. And I couldn’t let my best friend be the laughing stock of the whole school with no date.�

“You still managed to make me a laughing stock when I showed up with you.�

His mouth fell open, “I seem to remember all the girls gawking and asking me for autographs.�

I’ll leave out the fact that I slugged Maggie Smith in the face for making fun of Justin the next day. I also threw in the fact that she was one of the girls that gawked over him all night and got his autograph to all her little friends. See that was back when it wasn’t cool to like pop music, and how every one of the boy band people were “gay�. I still shook my head at that. Some guys would do anything to save their ego. Even when the person that threatens it is someone they don’t even know. Everyone at that school was just jealous of Justin, and I’ll be happy if I never see any of them again.

“Whatever makes you sleep at night.� I said smirking at him. I stood up on my tip toes and kissed him on the cheek, and embraced him in a hug. “I think I’m going to go back to bed. You should hit the sack soon too.� I said pulling from the embrace, and poking him in the stomach.

“I will in a few.�

“Alright, but don’t wait to long.�

“Yes mother.�

I rolled my eyes, and started toward the stairs. I had a crazy week to prepare for thanks to our trip back to Tennessee for thanksgiving.

Our trip to Tennessee changed everything. It was only the week before I trip that I realized that I might have feelings for Justin, but Thanksgiving just sealed the deal. We got to Tennessee three days before Thanksgiving and spent it with our respected families. We stayed for the whole week and it was nice to get a little TLC from my momma. He was so cute! I had to force him to go back to his mom’s and visit with her. My MOM had to reassure him that I would be fine. My MOM people! What the hell was my mom going to do, but he was just too cute that I couldn’t be annoyed. He came over and called everyday that I was with my mom. I spent the three days before Thanksgiving with my mother, and the days after I stayed with Justin and Lynn. It was during one of those days that I stayed with my mother that I began to question everything.


I heard the doorbell ring, and got up as quick as I could to answer it. “Just a second!� I called as I waddled to the door. I pulled back the curtain and rolled my eyes and smiled when I saw Justin’s face.

“To what do I owe this pleasure?� I asked smiling as I leaned up against the door.

“I was wondering if you wanted to go for a walk with me.�

“Right now?�

“No, tomorrow. Yes right now. That is if you’re up to it.�

I shrugged, and ushered him in, “Just let me go get my jacket.� I said as I closed the door behind him.

“Alright. Hey are you and your mom coming over tomorrow?� He asked as he sat down on the all too familiar couch as I walked into my room.

“Yeah. We’re going to go visit grandma first then we’ll be over.� I called from my room.

“Mom’s going all out.�

“So is my mom.� I said coming out of my room. I closed my door and walked toward the couch where he was sitting. “Can you help me?� I asked handing him my coat.

“Sure.� He said grabbing my coat, and standing up.

“I swear she bought out the whole grocery store today. She’s planning on making all her stuff this afternoon and tonight. So my hunger pains are gonna be going crazy.� I said smiling as I put my arms through the sleeves of the coat that he held up.

“You could always stay with us.�

“You’re not sick of me?� I said smiling as I turned around.

“No, I actually miss you.�

“No you don’t.� I said hitting him on the arm.

“Why wouldn’t I?� Justin said. I was about to list all the reasons why, but he stopped me. “Don’t you dare.� He said before I could even speak a word. “Forget I asked.� He said smiling, as he grabbed my hand. “Come on.� He said leading me toward the door.

“Where are we going on this walk?�

“It’s a surprise.� He said letting me close the door behind me. I hate when Justin says he has surprises. You never know what the hell he’s come up with. But I was beginning to think if he led me to the end of the earth, I’d follow him.





“Does this look familiar?� Justin asked as I let go of his hand. I hadn’t seen this place in years.

“I haven’t been here in forever! It all still looks the same.�

The place was a park that we used to play at when we were all kids. The swings, the slides, it all looked the same. It had been so long since I had seen the place I was surprised it was still here.

“Push me?� I asked as I sat down in the swing.

“Who’s going to push me?� He said as he walked behind me and pulled the swing back to give me a start.

I laughed and we fell into a comfortable silence but it was soon broken as he sat in the swing next to me. “We need to talk.�

I saw the look on his face, and I put my feet out to stop. When I finally slowed down, I put a hand on the chain and turned to look at him, “What’s up?�

He grabbed the hand that was on the chain of the swing and took it in his, “I have been doing a lot of thinking lately.�

Immediately I thought the worst. He was having second thoughts on raising the baby, “You have?�

He smiled, “Yes I have and I have come to a conclusion.�

Trying desperately to save myself any devastation I said, “You’re having second thoughts aren’t you?�

“No I…�

“I mean I understand, seriously I do. You have a career you have to think about, millions of girls that you could have, and I understand all that.�

“Lori, will you shut up? You didn’t let me finish.� He said smiling and shaking his head.

“I’m sorry.�

“The conclusion that I have come up with is nothing about me not wanting to have anything to do with the baby or you. I want to do things right.�

“Umm, it’s a little late for that isn’t it?� I said smiling as I placed a hand on my stomach.

“Ok well not by the book right, but right none the less. I want to raise this baby with you, and I want to be apart of this child’s life and I mean every part. I don’t want to miss anything because she’s living with you in a different house. This baby has changed a lot of things for me, and put a lot of things in perspective for me. She’s made me rethink my priorities, and…everything.�

“What are you saying?� I asked. Was he saying what I thought he was saying?

“I’m saying…do you realize how much guts this is taking for me to do this?� He said with a smile.

Oh god I think I’m going to be sick. He’s not for real is he?

“I, I, I’m not sure wha-what you’re doing. So I can’t really say.� I said. Could you tell that I was nervous when I said that? Did he fall on his head earlier? He can’t be doing this.

“I love you. I really, really, love you. I love you and this baby, and I…� He paused for a minute and got out of this swing and crawled in front of me on one knee. He reached into his pocket and pulled out a ring. Yeah I’m definitely going to be sick. Holy shit! “I want you to marry me.� He said holding up the ring for me to see. Ok, he did good. He did really good. It was white gold, square cut diamond, and beautiful. It was simple yet elegant enough to catch your eye. How the hell did he know that was the exact ring that I wanted? Yep, just as I suspected. He was for real. Anyone see a place where I could throw up?

“Are you serious?�

He smiled and handed me the ring, “Yes I’m serious.�

“Justin this…you’re really serious?�

“Yes. One hundred and ten percent positive I am serious.�

“Justin you can’t be.� I said.

Do you know how many girlfriends this man has had? I do. I was never one of them. Of course he never got any of them knocked up either. I mean hello if you were me what would you be thinking in this situation? Ok, never mind I know what you would be thinking. You would be thinking he’s Justin Timberlake, hell yes marry him! But what if you were in my shoes, and were knocked up by your best friend, whom you have never had any sort of relationship with besides a kiss on Christmas Eve under the mistle toe that you couldn’t forget even if you tried? Whew, that was a long breath there. Anyway, seriously, if you were me wouldn’t you be thinking he was just wanting to marry you to make things right? Wouldn’t you think he was a little blinded by your ever growing belly carrying his child? Well that’s how I felt. With good reason ya know? He just bombarded me with this thing. I had no idea he was planning this. Although he was acting sort of weird around me during this whole week. Well actually ever since that night I found him in the kitchen. And since then he had been overly touchy, and possessive. But how was I to know he was thinking all this?

“I can’t except it.� I said handing him back the ring.

“What? Lori, why?�

“Because Justin, I don’t want to get married simply because we got pregnant!� I said standing up, and leaving him still down on one knee in front of the swing. I stopped at the edge of the swing set and leaned up against a pole with my back toward him.

“We wouldn’t be getting married just because of the baby. I love you, I really do.�

“Justin, come on! We haven’t even been dating. We can’t…no!�

“Who cares if we haven’t dated? I’ve known you ever since I can remember. There is not a memory that I have that doesn’t have you in it somewhere. I know you, you know me. You know me better than any girl that I’ve ever dated. That’s all that counts. Plus the fact that I love you.�

“So what if I do? You don’t know all my little quirks. What if you marry me and that turns you off?�

I was serious, but the dufus laughed at me. He really freaking laughed at me. I thought it was a serious question. I mean come on everyone knows that had to be the reason that Jessica and Nick broke up. They had never lived together before, and didn’t realize how much they really clashed. The classic divorce case of the neat freak and the slob. The Smart one versus the not so smart one.


�Quirks? Lori, if any one knows them it’s me. Some of the guys that you’ve dated for a year didn’t even know that your name was Lorelei.�

“You know all my quirks? Name one.� I demanded as I crossed my arms over my chest.

“Alright,� He said as he crossed his arms also. “When you’re nervous you bite the inside of your cheek. Like you’re doing now.�

I immediately stopped, and he smiled noticing that I stopped. He continued, “On New Year’s Eve you always seclude yourself from everyone and go outside for at least ten minutes. I never know what you wish, but I know you do.�

“How did you know that?�

“Come on I pay attention more than you think. Plus you’ve been doing it ever since we were teenagers.�

“So? That’s nothing. What if I leave my dirty clothes all over the place, and you can’t stand that?�

“I leave my dirty clothes all over the place, and you’re the one who can’t stand that.�

Ok he was good. “What if I leave the cap of the toothpaste?�

“You don’t do that either. You throw it away even if it the littlest bit crusty.�

Damn him! What did he do stalk me? “Ok you’re good. But still that doesn’t over rule the fact that we would be doing this for all the wrong reasons.�

“Lori, I love you. What part of that don’t you understand?�

“I do know you love me, but not the way that matters. Not the way I imagined it all for me.�

“Lori I do love you!� He said grabbing me by the shoulders, “I think the question is do you love me?�

The question that I so hoping to avoid. I was still trying to get all my thoughts in order, and he asks me what I already thought. Great. But I was NOT about to lie to him though.

“I…I don’t know.�

“You don’t know?�

“Yes! I don’t know! I know I have feelings for you, but I’m still trying to get them all in check.�

He looked at me again, “You don’t know?�

Ok now I was starting to get annoyed, “What else do you want me to say, Justin? That’s just it! I do…not…know!�

“It’s a simple yes or no question Lori.�

“No it’s not that simple Justin. I want to be one hundred percent sure that I love you. Those are words that I don’t throw around easily.�

“So I do?�

“That’s not what I’m saying! You, of all people, know that those are words that I can’t say very easy. They’re hard. They’re especially hard to say to a man.� I said as a stray tear fell down my cheek. I could tell that he remembered why those words were so hard to say. He knew my fear of having a relationship that would end up like my mother and father. I was so afraid to love a man for fear that I would love a man like my father. I was stupid enough to let that guard down once, and regretted it ever since. He hurt me more than any of the three hundred assholes I dated. Like mom and…we’ll call him “sperm donor� from now on. Anyway, like mom and sperm donor, Adam and I were high school sweethearts. We started dating our junior year, and lasted well into my sophomore year of college. We were engaged actually, but all of that came to a screeching halt when I found him at home with another woman. He wasn’t with her like you’re thinking. Apparently this woman was pregnant with his baby, and it was a result of a fling that he had before we got engaged. He of course ordered a test and the girl was telling the truth. I in turn threw the ring that he gave me at his head, and a number of other things along with it. In the end I had a broken heart, and he was supposedly happily married and had a kid. All the things that was supposed to have been for me.

“Lori, I know. But I’m not your father and I’m not Adam. I would never hurt you.�

“You say that but you can’t promise me that.�

“Have I ever lied to you before?� He said wiping away my tears that fell down my face.

“Yes.�

“When?�

“When we were eight. You broke my New Kids on the Block CD and threw it away, but told me that I lost it.�

“That was on accident in my defense, but completely different in this situation.�

“Can I at least think about it?�

“Yeah. Yeah you can think about it.�

I smiled, and pulled my hand out of his grasp, “Thank you. Listen, my mom should be home by now. I need to get back and help her with all her cooking.�

“Can I walk you back?�

“I’ll be ok. I think I need a little time to myself.�

Boy, did I need time to myself.

“Will you at least keep this? Maybe it’ll help you make the decision.� He said grabbing my left hand and placing the ring on my ring finger. “That alone is worth marrying me.�

“Justin, you know that would be the last reason why I marry you.�

“Ah, but a reason none the less.�

“Not even a reason.�

“Ok then think of it as an added bonus. Along with my sexy bod.� He said wiggling his eyebrows.

“Shut up!� I said laughing. I looked at my hand with the ring on it. It really was a beautiful ring.

I started to walk away, and turned back to him, “I’ll see you tomorrow.�

“Yep.� He said waving at me. I waved back catching how my ring caught the sun light. Well I might as well forget about sleep tonight.





I think it was the next afternoon when mom and I were celebrating Thanksgiving with Justin and his family. It was a tradition that we had done over the years since it was usually just me and momma. Anyway, it was that afternoon sitting around the table with Justin sitting beside me that I realized everything. The way he would occasionally grab my hand under the table, and hold it for a while. The way that when everyone had to say what they were thankful for this year he said me and the baby. Then I started thinking about everything before us at this moment. I thought about how when no one else is there for me he’s always there. He knows everything about me. He’s never done anything to deliberately hurt me. Then I thought that if let myself love anyone, I wouldn’t want it to be anyone other than Justin. For the millionth time since Justin confessed his love for me, my mind returned to that kiss we had that one Christmas Eve, and I wondered if the reason I couldn’t ever get that moment out of my head was because I felt something for him then and just didn’t realize it. I had to see if it was still there.

We were clearing the dishes off the table for Lynn. Mom and Lynn had already put the food away, and Justin and I were left to do the dishes. He placed a dish in the sink, and he went to walk around me to grab more, but I stopped him with my hand. I stood there for a moment staring up at him, then I stood on my tip toes and pulled his face to mine, and I kissed him. I kissed him with everything that I had in me. I could feel…something rush threw me like fire, and he pulled me closer to him. Feeling as if I couldn’t breathe I pulled away. It was then that I realized…I’m in love with my best friend.

“Wow. That was…wow.� He said touching his lips and smiling at me.

“I have my answer.�

“To what?�

Was he really as dense as I thought he was? Seriously!

“The question you asked me yesterday, dumb ass!�

“Oh, OH! Wait which one?�

I sighed, smiled, and rolled my eyes, “Both.�

He smiled that cocky smile that’s sometimes permanently planted on his face, “Really? And what are your answers?�

I returned the smile, and did it better if I do say so myself, and wrapped my arms around his neck, “Yes, I’ll marry you. And yes, I do love you.�

“See that wasn’t so hard was it?�

Of all the men that I could have fell in love with it had to be this one. The one that has that sort of response to my declaration of love. Oh well, I guess I just have to take one for the team. God knows no one else would if they knew HALF the things I knew about him.

I was in love with Justin Timberlake.

I walked into Justin’s house and slammed the door. I just got back from my doctor’s appointment, and everything was fine. I was just a little irritated. I guess that comes with the territory huh? Everything today had been getting on my nerves. First you have LA Traffic, that in itself would drive someone to kill themselves, god knows I almost did. Second, Justin didn’t go with me today. You know for the past couple of days he seems like he’s been up to something. In fact, we’ve hardly spent any time together since we’ve been home and we’ve been home for almost a month. Anyway, and then we have the third and final factor. I met this perky upbeat mom today in the doctor’s office. Like me it was her first child, but my god her voice sounded like nails on a chalk board. She’s was just way too nice. Here let’s have a look.



“What are you having?� Melanie, the perky up beat mom that I met said.

A smiled as genuinely as I could. What was my problem today? “A girl.�

“A girl? Aw, I bet you’re so excited. I’m having a boy.�

“My fiancée wanted a boy.� Why am I telling her this?

“You’re not married?� She asked astonished. Do I really have to put up with this today?

“No, I’m not, along with the other half of the country.�

OK, maybe that was a little harsh, but come on!

I could see she knew she offended me, “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have said that. So have you thought of any names yet?�

“We’ve narrowed it down to a few, but we can’t decide. He wants one name, I want another. At the rate we’re going she’ll be Baby Timb…McBane all her life.�

Oh that was a close one! Luckily, Mrs. Perky didn’t pick up on that. “Oh I’m sure you’ll come up with something.�

“Eventually, I guess.� Boy, I wish they would call my name.

“Do you have your nursery finished?�

“No, I don’t actually.�

“How far along are you?�

“Six months.�

“And you don’t have your nursery finished? I had mine finished before I even knew what I was having. Of course I just knew we were having a boy.� She said with that Ha I beat you smiles. Was god trying to punish me for something?

“Well, we’ve looked at things that we want. I had my shower last week, and we got some things then. And we have a room picked out, but we haven’t made any big moves yet. My fiancé’s a pretty busy guy, and he’s kind of in demand so we don’t have a lot of time.�

“Well that doesn’t…�

“Mrs. McBane? The doctor is ready for you.�

I grabbed my purse, and pushed my way up out of the chair, “Listen, it was nice…chatting with you, but they just called me.� And from there I waddled my way into the doctor’s room as fast as I could. I don’t think I’ve ever been so happy to go into a plain white sterile room.




So here I am standing in the foyer of Justin’s house…well I guess our house now. Anyway, I ripped off my jacket, threw my keys on the table, along with my purse.

“Lori? Baby, you home?� I heard Justin call from upstairs

“Yeah, I’m home.� I called back and walked into the living room. I threw my coat across the back of the couch, and carefully fell back into the couch. I closed my eyes, but opened them when I heard Justin come into the room.

He had an odd, but happy pep in his step. What the hell was he up too? “Hey baby!� He said as he sat down beside me. He motioned he wanted a kiss, and I was happy to oblige. “How did the appointment go?�

I rolled my eyes, “Could have been better.�

“What? Is something wrong with the baby?�

“Oh no, no nothings wrong with the baby. Everything is fine. It’s just there was this other woman sitting in the waiting room, and my god she was so annoying.� I looked at him and he looked like he could hardly sit still, “What is up with you?�

“Nothing, nothing, I just have something to show you.� He could hardly contain the smile that was working up on his face.

“What is it?� I said smiling back.

“Well, come on and I’ll show you.� He said standing up and pulling me up with him.

“Justin.� I whined as he pulled me behind him. I was waddling as fast I could to keep up with him, “I’ve had the day from hell. I just want to sleep or something.� I said as we climbed the last step of the staircase.

“Close your eyes.�

“Justin!� I whined again.

“Ugh, fine. You’d peek anyway.� He said as he covered my eyes with his hand and slowly led me down the hallway. I heard a door open, “Ok just a few more seconds.� He said leading me further into what I hoped was a room and not off the edge of a balcony. Although I didn’t feel any air so I guess I was good.

“Alright sit right here.� I did as I was told and sat in a very comfortable chair that rocked. Damn this thing was comfortable now if only I could see where the hell I was.

“Can I open my eyes now?� I asked as I felt Justin pull his hand off my face. But my eyes remained closed just in case.

I felt him kneel down beside me and place a hand on my knee, “Ok you can open them now.�

I opened my eyes, and my hand immediately found its way over my mouth. “Oh my god!� I said looking around me. The nursery that I told the bitch at the office that I didn’t have was now complete. Complete with everything that I had wanted and picked out down to the color pink that I wanted for the walls. The color was a light pink. The kind of pink that you always saw with baby stuff. It was pink enough to let you know it was pink but yet was kind of warm and inviting which was exactly what I wanted. There really wasn’t a theme to the room except for pink and teddy bears. I hadn’t gotten around to that. But wow, this was good enough for me. The room was equipped with the baby bed, changing table, bassinet, diaper genie, millions of diapers, wipes, and basically everything that a baby would need. I felt a few tears fall down my face, and I looked at Justin smiling.

“This is amazing! Everything is perfect!� I said in awe of what I was seeing. I stood up and rubbed my hand across the edge of the baby bed. I walked over to the closet, and saw all her little outfits hanging up on the little hangers. I felt more tears fall down my face. I was more than ready for her to get here so I dress her in these things. Although some of them she wouldn’t be wearing for a few months but believe me there was no rush for her to be able to wear those.

“So this is what you’ve been up too ever since we got home?�

He smiled and walked over to me, “Yep. I wanted to surprise you with something, and I knew not having the nursery finished for Megan…�

“Lilly.� I said cutting him off.

“Whatever…anyway I knew not having the nursery finished for Megan was beginning to bug the hell out of you so Trace and I have been working on it whenever we could. I just finished the little things today. Like getting everything where it needed to go. Last night was spent putting everything together and by the end of the night I was ready to shove the screwdriver into Trace’s head.�

I laughed and wrapped my arms around his neck, “Thank you so much.� I said placing a little kiss on his lips. “It’s wonderful.�

“My pleasure, although I can think of a few ways you could thank me later.� He said wrapping his hands around my waist.

“Ha. Not happening for a while buddy.� I said laying my head on his chest. You know for people who spent their lives in a friendly relationship, we fell just fine in the boyfriend girlfriend relationship. Sure there were something’s that we had to adjust too, but it wasn’t an awkward transition at all. We decided to take things slow. I’m starting to truly believe that he was my soul mate. When I think back on all the other men that I have dated, I just want to kick myself because the one that I was always looking for was right beside me all along. It just took me getting knocked up by him to realize. How funny is that?



“Ok. So we’ve narrowed it down to Megan and Lilly. Now the question is which one and what’s the middle name?� he said as he laid the baby name book on his lap.

I rolled my eyes, and climbed into bed next to him. “Lilly.�

“Come on! Why Lilly? Megan is so much prettier!�

“Megan is…no. Not Megan.�

“Why not?�

I sighed, “Because! I like Lilly better.� I said as I sunk lower into our bed. It’s not that I loathed Megan it’s just I like Lilly a lot better. It fits a little girl, plus it’s my favorite flower.

“What is so wrong with Megan?�

“Nothing, I just like Lilly better.�

“When we were looking at that book last week you said you like Megan.�

“You did the same with Lilly.� I said smiling.

“Come on Lori. This isn’t funny. This is our kid’s name we’re talking about here!� He said hitting me with the book on my arm.

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry. I’ll help. I promise.� I said trying to control my laughter. “How about this? We both like the names the other wants correct?�

“Yeah.�

“So how about we write the names down, you go get one of your many hats, and we’ll put the names in there and draw. Which one is pulled out first will be the name.�

“I’LL draw the name because you’ll cheat.� He said pointing at me as he got up to go get one of his hats. I laughed and opened the drawer of my nightstand and pulled out some paper and a pen.

A few minutes later I had the names written out, and put them in the hat. “No cheating.� I said as I grabbed the hat from him and shook the papers around. “Here.� I said handing it back to him. Simply because he always gets his way, the paper will end up reading Megan. I guess I better get used to this huh?

I rolled my eyes when I saw his smile. “What is it?� I asked

“Megan.� He said happily. He grabbed the book, but was to slow. I grabbed it first and held it out of his reach.

“Nope.� I said pushing him back. “Your name got picked for the first name now it’s totally fair that I get to pick the middle name.�

He huffed and fell back on his side, “Not fair.�

“How is it not fair?� I said trying not to laugh at his childishness.

“It’s not because shouldn’t I get a say in all aspects of my child’s life? Including naming her?�

“Did you not read off of that piece of paper that her name is Megan? You got the name you wanted; now I get to pick the name that I want for the middle name.� I said opening the book. I began to look over the pages, and looked out of the corner of my eye at Justin. He was still pouting and had his arms crossed his chest. I sighed and laid the book on my stomach.

“What?� I said, “What is the matter with you?�

“Nothing.�

“Then why are you pouting?�

“Because.�

“Because you’re acting like a five year old?�

“No, because you’re treating naming our child like we’re fighting over who goes first playing Candy Land.�

“You’re pouting because you’re not getting your way.�

“I am not!�

“Justin, stop it! You’re acting like a five year old. I did it this way because if not we’d still be fighting over the first name until her first day of Kindergarten. And I personally don’t want my daughter going to her first day of school with the name Baby Timberlake.�

“We would not!�

“Justin, when we were kids we fought over who goes first for the whole three hours we were allowed to play together a day and you had to go home and we never even got to play. So yes it would happen like that.�

“Our child and a stupid board game do NOT compare.�

“But the way we fight over something we both want compare.� I said smiling at him. “But I guess we can both pick one out together. BUT we both have to agree on it. It’s not going to end up like the whole Lilly and Megan ordeal.�

He smiled, “I promise.� He said as he leaned over and kissed me. Is this how it’s always going to be? That I’ll always get suckered into doing what he wants?

Huge. I am huge I tell you! I officially cannot even see the tips of my toes anymore. For all I know my polish on my toes could be chipped and ugly. But I guess it’s all worth it. I smile as I look at myself in the mirror. Megan Elise. We decided on her whole name and we didn’t even fight over it. Aren’t you proud of us? Well, I’m glad that we finally got the name and the nursery all squared away. At least now I don’t feel like a dead beat parent. Ok I know this is a random fact but my boobs are huge. I used to be a 34 C now I’m a 34 D. Crazy huh? That’s one major perk of this whole thing. My closet was full of all my old clothes but I had bought all these adorable maternity clothes thinking I would be getting out of the house more than I am, and I’ve barely worn all my outfits. I have this one amazing black dress. It’s maternity but it’s beautiful. It’s a halter cut and the only part that it really hugs is my boobs, and from the breast line down it has this flow type feel to it and doesn’t hug my stomach at all. It’s probably the most comfortable dress that I own. I tried it on one day just for kicks, and I have to say that I looked pretty in it. I’m starting to get a little restless. I want to get out of this house. I want to see more than just the backyard. I want my job back. I want to actually feel like I’m in a relationship with Justin. We haven’t even been on an official date and we’ve been together now for two months. I want to feel pretty. Ok enough of looking at myself in the mirror. I pulled my hair into a messy ponytail and made my way downstairs.

“Hello Sunshine.� I heard Trace say from his spot at the counter. He was drinking coffee. The son of a bitch was drinking coffee in front of me. He knew damn good and well that I couldn’t drink coffee while I was pregnant. Oh he was a sorry bastard.

“Is it your goal in life to torture the shit out of me?� I asked him as I grabbed the orange juice out of the fridge.

“No, it’s my job.� He said coming around the counter and kissing my cheek. He still had the mug of coffee in his hand.

“Well consider yourself fired.� I said as I returned the gesture. I caught a heavenly whiff of the coffee in his mug. Damn. Of all the things that I miss out of this pregnancy I miss coffee the most.

I felt him wrap his arm around me, and pull me to him from the side in kind of a from the side kind of hug. “You ok?� he asked.

“Yeah, I’m fine. Why do you ask?�

“You're getting enough sleep?�

“Yeah, it would probably be safe to say that I’m getting too much sleep. It’s sad when the only place you go is too the doctor.�

“So that’s what I’m seeing that’s different.�

“What do you mean?� Weird, I didn’t know Trace could read people. Well that’s one good thing with Trace, you never know with that kid.

“Well I could tell that something’s up with you. I knew you weren’t having problems in the relationship department because I would have already heard about that from either of you. Then I thought it was just the pregnancy taking its toll but you’ve had this…glow the whole time so I knew that couldn’t be it. So now you’ve confirmed my suspicions. You’ve got to Cabin Fever.�

I smiled, “Yeah I do. There are only so many books you can read, and only so much TV you can watch before you get sick of it all and want to throw it out the window. I want to go out to dinner with my boyfriend. I want to breathe fresh air other than the air that’s in the backyard. I want to actually get the chance to wear my maternity clothes.�

“Have you talked to Justin about it?�

“Well, it hasn’t really bothered me much until now. I don’t know why but today it’s just really gnawing at me.�

He kissed my temple, and walked around to where he was sitting before. “Well you’ve only got two more months to go.�

“I know.� I said rubbing my hand over my stomach. “Feel free to stay as long as you want. I think Justin had some sort of meeting this morning he should be back before noon. I think I’m gonna go upstairs.�

“Ok. Listen if you want to go do something I’ll be more than happy to take you. We can go grab a late breakfast; we can even go shopping if you want too.�

As much as I wanted to do all those things, I love Trace I really do but he wasn’t the one that I wanted to do them with. I wanted to do something with Justin.

“Thanks Trace, but it’s alright. I’ve survived this long; I’ll survive a little longer.� I walked around to him and placed a kiss on his cheek. “Thanks though. It means a lot that you care.�

“Why wouldn’t I? You’re my best friend too ya know? I’m just as loyal to you as I am to Justin. It’s Justin that pays me for it though.� He said with a smile as I smacked him on the arm.

“I’ll see you later.� I said as I walked toward the staircase. I guess I could use a nap.




Two hours later I found myself awake with a smiling boyfriend leaning over me. “Hey.�

I smiled and stretched my arms over my head, “Hey.� I said sighing as my arms fell.

He pushed some hair out of my eyes and rubbed the side of my cheek with his thumb, “Are you feeling ok?�

“Yeah, I’m fine. Did you just get home?�

“Yeah, it’s 11:30.�

“Is Trace still here?� I asked as I began to sit up. I leaned back against the pillows and yawned.

“He just left. But I talked to him though.�

“What about?�

“He told me how you’re feeling lately. I’m sorry that you’ve been stuck in the house this whole time. If I would have known…�

“Hey it’s fine.� I said silencing him with my finger against his lips, “Just like I told Trace. It’s never really bothered me until now. You know me I don’t like staying holed up for to long. At first I had the things that I was doing for you to keep me busy, but now all I have our books and TV and there’s only so much of that that I can take to keep my attention span entertained.�

“I know and I’m sorry. I was the one that thought that it would be best for Trace to take over it all until you were able to come back full time. I should have known better.�

“Hey, it’s not a big deal, seriously.�

“Yeah it is. He also told me about you wanting to have dinner with me, and how much of a sorry boyfriend I was for not taking you on a date.�

I smiled, “Well you’re not that sorry.� I said as I grabbed his hand and intertwined his fingers with mine.

“Really? Because you apparently have a closet full of maternity clothes that you haven’t worn yet.�

“Justin, its fine. Besides you wouldn’t want to go to dinner with someone who looked like a huge whale.� I said looking down at his hand.

“Lori, you’re not a whale for the zillionth time. You’re pregnant and you look beautiful and I would love nothing more than to go on a date with the woman that I love.�

My head popped up. Ok I knew that he loved me, and he knew that I loved him. I mean we both admitted over Thanksgiving that we were in love with each other, but we’ve never actually said I love you to each other.

“You love me?� I asked with a smile on my face as I played with his fingers.

“Yeah I do. So, you wanna go out with me? We could go see a movie or something. When’s the last time you did that?�

“Like seven months ago.� I said with a smile.

“Well it’s your choice we can do whatever you want.� He said as he leaned over and kissed me.

“Can we stay here and kiss all night?� I said as I smiled and let our foreheads rest on each other’s.

“We could or we could go out and I could show off my pregnant girlfriend.�

Shit, if we go out to dinner what if someone notices us? He doesn’t need that kind of publicity right now, and we don’t need it on the baby.

“What if someone see us? We don’t need that kind of publicity. For you or the baby.�

“You’re right. Well, how about we lay here and kiss a while and your amazing boyfriend will think up something before the day is over with. Then we can go on our official first date.�

I smiled, “Sounds like a plan to me.�




At five thirty that night I found myself in my pretty black dress sitting on the beach between Justin’s legs with his arms wrapped around me watching the sun set. He had his coat wrapped around me, and it was all just amazing. We didn’t go to dinner or anything. We just figured we could dress up and spend the evening at the beach and maybe grab McDonalds on the way home. It wasn’t much but it was wonderful to me. I smiled as I felt Justin’s face against the back of neck as he placed a kiss under my ear lobe and he placed his chin on my shoulder.

“Do you regret this?� he asked.

“This night?�

“No, I mean this whole thing. Me getting you pregnant, my professing my undying love to you, keeping you cooped up in the house, etc. etc.?�

I laughed, “Do you really think that?�

“Well come on. We’re together yes, we love each other yes, but how everything got laid out…let’s face it wasn’t a picture perfect romance and I know how much you’ve always wanted that.�

“Ok, yes you’ve got a point. But no I don’t regret any of it. No it wasn’t picture perfect, but seriously when has anything in my life been picture perfect? This, meaning how things happened between you and I, is how I do things. It wouldn’t be me if it were like some Cinderella Story.�

“So knowing what you know now, would you still go out with Trace and I that night?�

“Yep.� I said leaning my head back against him and positioning my head where I could see him. I placed a kiss on his jaw. “Except, I think I would lay off the Jose a little bit so I could have at least remembered the sex.�

I smiled when I heard his laugh, “Me too.� He said as he placed a kiss on my forehead. “Just think it’ll be better on our wedding night. It’ll be like our first time, except technically it’s not, but at least we’ll remember that one.�

“What makes you think we’re gonna wait until our wedding night?�

He looked down at me surprised, “I just figured.�

“Oh if you only knew.� I said laughing.

“Knew what?�

“These hormones are a killer. Why do you think I’m never in the room when you come out of your shower?�

He laughed, “So you’re saying it takes all you have not to jump my bones?�

“I guess, but being pregnant really increases the sex drive. So, Trace even looks appealing right now.� I said jokingly.

“That’s wrong.�

“I’m just kidding. But seriously it does increase the sex drive.�

“Well, I promise once this baby is born I’ll make it up to you.�

“Really? Can I get that in writing?� I asked positioning my head again to where I could see his face.

“You can get any way you want it.� He said flirtatiously as he kissed me.

Oh I could definitely get used to this.

Two Months Later – Last Week of February
Baby Due Date – MARCH 7


I’ve tried everything! Everything! And this kid still wants to torture me. I’m so desperate that I’ll have sex with Justin! Not that it would be so bad, but I don’t want anyone touching me right now ya know? As you can tell I’m very impatient! I know I only have a week, but I’ve had this feeling that she wasn’t going to come on her due date. I’ve always had this feeling she was going to come earlier, but I guess she wants to make a liar out of her mother.

By the way it’s three in the morning. She also gets a kick out of keeping her mother up at all hours of the night. I guess if she’s not comfortable she’s going to make me uncomfortable right along with her. So here I am in the living room pacing back and forth with a bottle of water in my hand. I would much prefer a cup of coffee but she also prides herself on not letting me have coffee. I mean if she won’t let me sleep she could at least make a compromise and let me have my damn coffee! I have been a HUGE grouch!

“Baby, what are you doing down here?� I heard Justin say from the entrance to the living room.

Oops. “I couldn’t sleep.�

“So you’re pacing?�

“Yes, I’m pacing. She likes this for whatever reason. If I sit down or lie down she starts kicking like crazy. Let me tell you that’s not the most comfortable feeling in the world.� I said putting my hands on the small of my back as I continued my pacing. I glared at Justin as I heard him laughing.

“This is not a laughing matter Justin Randall.� The laughter immediately ceased. “I’m miserable here.� I whined. I heard him snicker and make his way over to me. He wrapped his arms around me from behind as best he could and surprisingly they fit all the way around me. He placed a kiss on my cheek.

“I know you are honey but just think in a couple days all this will be over.�

My contractions had already started but they were still irregular. My doctor told that if they start coming in patterns to time them and see how far apart they are. How the hell did she expect me to time them when all I could do was sit there and wince in pain much less look at a damn clock? So far no pattern! Damn it!

“That’s easy for you to say. You’re not the one in pain here.� I said whining again. The kicking began to start again, “Ow! Damn it. I’m starting to get dizzy from all this pacing.� I said as I began to move out of his arms, but he pulled me back.

“Dance with me.� He said as he began to sway with me.

“Justin come on it weren’t three in the morning and I wasn’t pregnant I would dance with you, but your daughter likes to pace so I’m gonna have to get back to you on that.� I said as I started to pull away again but with now success.

“She obviously likes the movement. So dancing is just as good as pacing except it saves you from dizziness.�

I smiled at him. He’s been wonderful throughout this whole thing. But I don’t want to keep him up. At least someone in this relationship will be getting sleep.

“That’s sweet but why don’t you back up there and get some sleep? At least someone in this house will be.�

“Nope, I can’t do that. Remember I said I’ll be with you in this whole thing? Besides I can’t sleep without you there anyway.� He said turning me around to face and wrapping my arms around his neck. Isn’t he the sweetest man alive?

“Well, when you put it that way…� I stopped mid sentence and doubled over grabbing my stomach. Damn contractions! “Ow! Damn!�

“Baby are you alright?� I heard Justin say. But I couldn’t say anything.

“Contractions.� I said in between breaths. Damn this one was huge!

“Is there anything I can do?�

“No, no.� I said still doing the breathing techniques I learned from the first week of Lamas class that I went too. A few more minutes and it was gone.

“Are you ok?� Justin asked again.

“Yeah, I’m fine. Damn that one was huge.�

“Should we be worrying?�

I grabbed his hand reassuringly, “No, Dr. Spencer said only to worry if they start become a pattern and become closer together.�

“I think you should come lay down.�

“She seems like she’s calmed down. And I could use some sleep.�

“Alright come on I’ll help you.� He said holding on to my hand and leading me toward the staircase.

I began to climb the stairs and I hadn’t even reached the third one when I felt this…I don’t even know how to describe it. But my pajama pants were soaked. Uh-oh! I thought to myself, and I stopped on the stair. I don’t even know what kind of look I had on my face when Justin turned around.

“Honey, why did you stop?� He said then he saw my face, “Are you alright?�

“Uh-oh.� I said aloud.

“Uh-oh? What the hell is uh-oh?� he said coming back down the stairs that he climbed. Obviously I had got some on the stairs, “What the hell?� He said picking up his sock clad foot and moving back up a step.

“My water broke.� I said blinking my eyes in disbelief.

“Your what broke?�

“My water…Ow!� I said as I grabbed on to the banister as tight as I could. Another damn contraction.

So do you think it’s time to worry yet?

Contractions are in a pattern.

They hurt like a mother fucking bitch.

And I have this wet…stuff all over me.

Yeah, I think it’s time to worry.

“Baby? What’s going on?� Justin asked as grabbed a hold of my face that was contorted in all different expressions. Mostly pain.

“Baby…water…broke…hospital.� I said as coherently as I could.

“What baby? I can’t understand you?�

HELLO!! Can he not see I’m in pain? I can’t exactly answer questions at the moment! Can’t the dumbass see that I’m going in to labor!

Ahhh…that feels better. It’s over.

For now.

“My water broke.� I said almost out of breath. “We need to get to the hospital. I’m in labor.�

“Now?�

“YEAH NOW!� I said still clutching my stomach

Justin rubbed his hand across his head, “Alright, alright. Um, you wait here. Let me go get some clothes on…�

“I am NOT going in there looking like this.�

“Honey, you’re…�

“I am soaked from the waist down! I am NOT sitting in this all night.� I said as I pushed past him up the stairs, but I paused on the top step and turned back around to Justin. I sighed, “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to blow up on you. I’m not really in the best of…moods. This shit really fucking hurts.� I said as he stopped on the step under mine which brought us dangerously close. He had no shirt on. He had just his pajama bottoms on. I grabbed him by the face and brought our foreheads together. For once I was the tall person. “Anything that sounds remotely…bitchy that I say after this point, I do NOT mean. For a little heads up, I love you, and I’m sorry for anything that I say in advance.�

He grabbed my face too, “You’re forgiven.� He said as he kissed me, “In advance.�

He grabbed my hand as he climbed the last step and led me to our room, “Now let’s get ready to get this baby borned.� He said with a fake southern accent.

Oh God. Here comes another one!

Well here we go. In like 20 more minutes Megan Elise Timberlake will be in my arms. Justin and I arrived at the hospital at 3:30 in the morning, and it is now 10:00 at night. Yep, seven hours of wonderful, exciting torture that I wouldn’t trade for anything in the world. And I say that in all seriousness. Though it would be nice if Justin could take over some of this pain.

This is…wow. It’s all happening so fast. It seems like yesterday when I wasn’t pregnant, and I wasn’t in love with Justin Timberlake.

So I’ve dilated to a ten already, and I’m being moved into the delivery room. A little word of advice, if you ever get pregnant and your about to have your baby. Never look at the ceiling as they wheel you away. It’ll make you nauseous and believe that’s the last thing you want. I looked at the people that were around my bed once they got me settled in the delivery room. I saw my doctor, the nurses, and my mom. Everyone was scrubbed up and ready to go, but I didn’t see Justin. I was extremely tired, but other than that I was pretty normal. I was very happy that I took that epidural when I did. Otherwise…woo.

“Mom, where’s Justin?� I asked as she grabbed my hand as they put my legs in the stirrups.

Even though I couldn’t see her face because it was covered by the surgical mask, I knew she was smiling at me. “He’ll be right here honey. They nurses are getting him…�

“Here I am. I’m right here baby.� I heard Justin say as he grabbed my other hand. I smiled as I turned my head toward him. He was dressed in the sterile clothes that they give you and I couldn’t see his face, but his eyes were all that mattered to me. As long as I could see his eyes everything was fine. I didn’t need to see his face to know what he was thinking. His eyes told it all. He was rubbing my head reassuringly. “Everything’s going to be fine. A few more minutes and our baby will be here.� He said as he placed a kiss on my forehead.

“Ok, Lori. I want you to push on my count, ok? We’re almost ready to go here.�

“Alright.� I said pushing up to get myself into position. My mom and Justin helped me stay in position like we practiced earlier by holding me under my arms. I took a deep breath, leaned my head back a little bit, and closed my eyes.

God I was nervous. I guess Justin caught wind of this and said, “You’re going to do fine. You can do this.�

I shook my head yes in response. I was starting to feel her. I was still pretty numb, but I could feel her now. This is amazing.

“Ok, Lori. You ready?� I heard the doctor say. I closed my eyes, and licked my lips as I shook my head.

“Yes, I’m ready.� I said as I grabbed Justin’s hand tighter. He gripped back letting me know that he was there with me.

“Alright, on one I want you to take a deep breath and start to push. Once I reach ten you can stop alright?�

I shook my head again. Bloody hell! Can’t we just get on with it?

“Here we go. One…�

Then I took a breath and pushed as hard as I could. I heard my mother and Justin whispering words of encouragement, and I concentrated on their voices.

“…Ten. Alright, you can let it go.�

A let out the breath and leaned my head back breathing vigorously. I could feel the sweat already beginning to form. I felt Justin place a firm kiss on the side of my forehead.

“Baby, you’re doing so well! I’m so proud of you! Just a couple more, baby.�

I looked up at him with tired eyes, “You mean that wasn’t it?�

I could see in his eyes that he was amused, “No baby. We still have a few more to go.�

“Well, they better hurry it up.�

I could hear my mother, Justin, and the staff laughing at my comment. But I didn’t see one damn thing funny about it. But I was to tired to argue. All I wanted was to see my baby for the first time, and sleep.

“Alright we’re getting ready for the next round. On my count again, ok?�

I brought my head back up, and shook it yes.

“Here we go. And One…Two…Three…Four…Five…Six…Seven…Eight…Nine…Ten. Alright you can let it go.�

Again I let my breath out with force, and I heard the doctor say, “I’ve got the head, Mr. Timberlake would you like too see?�

I almost smiled when I saw Justin swallow nervously. I saw his adam’s apple move very quickly with the swallow, and then his fell on me. I could tell that he was not very anxious to see what was going on over that sheet. I can’t say that I blame him. “Uh, I think I’ll pass. I’ll wait until all of her is here.� I heard him tell the doctor.

I smiled as much of a smile I could muster and said hoarsely, “Pussy.�

I heard him laugh, “I’ll let you slide this time.�

I could hear the amusement in the doctor’s voice as he spoke up, “Alright Lori, I know you’re tired but just one more time, and you’re baby will be here. You ready for one more round?�

I hoarsely replied, “Not really, but do I have a choice in the matter?’

“I guess not. On my count alright?� The doctor said laughing.

I shook my head, and gripped Justin’s hand, “Let’s do it.� I said.

“And One…Two…Three…Four…Five…Six…Seven…Eight…Nine…Ten. Alright, let it go.� I heard him say.

I heard the cry of a baby, and I immediately started to cry. Justin and my mom let me go, and helped me lay back down on the bed. I was out of breath, tired, and more than anxious to see my child.

I grabbed Justin’s hand again, “Where is she? Did you see her?�

Justin pulled the mask off his face with his free hand, and I could see the tears in his eyes as well, “I saw her. All six pounds and nine ounces of her. She’s fine. Perfectly fine.�

“Does she have all her toes? All her fingers?�

I saw him smile, “From what I could tell she had them all.�

“Where is she?� I said through my tears.

“They’re cleaning her up.�

“I want to see her.�

“You will baby. She’s just getting cleaned up.�

I felt my mother grab my other hand, “I just saw her. She’s perfect darling. Perfect. All ten toes and all ten fingers. You did good, baby.� She said as she kissed my temple and wiped my tears from my face. She kissed my cheek once more, and walked back over to where they were cleaning Megan up.

“We did it.� Justin said as he continued rubbing my head.

I smiled tiredly, “There was no ‘we’ involved in this.�

He smiled back, “So I had no part in making her?�

“Baby for all I know Trace could be her father.�

“You better be glad I know you’re joking.�

Our attention was turned back to my mother who was walking toward us with Megan in her arms, “I think someone is ready to meet her parents.� My mom said as she placed Megan into my arms.

Bloody hell, the water works are starting back up again. She’s so beautiful. “Hi baby.� I said as I gently kissed her forehead. I rubbed my finger into her palm and she gripped it.

“I think we did a good job.� Justin said as he did the same with her other palm.

I looked up at him, “She’s perfect.� I said as he sat down on the bed beside me. He wrapped his arm around me, and I laid my head on his chest.

We sat there enjoying our first moments with her until they had to take her to the nursery and me back to my room. Which for that I was grateful. I needed sleep before I had to face everyone out in the waiting room.




Once I was back in my room it was just Justin and I. I was beginning to fall asleep considering I had been up for almost a full 24 hours.

“Do you want me to stay with you tonight?� I heard Justin say against my hair as he kissed my head.

“You can go home if you want. I’m sure you’ll want to shower, and entertain all our excited guests.� I said as I smiled against his chest.

“Not as much as I want to stay with you. But at least one of us shouldn’t be rude.�

I smacked him lightly on the stomach, “I was in pain, and tired. I’m sure Lynn completely understood and everyone else.�

“I was just kidding baby.� He said laughing.

“When you see them tell them all I’m sorry.�

“I will.� He said as he placed another kiss against my head. “I think I’m going to go now. I’m gonna stop by the nursery and see Megan before I go. You get some sleep.� He said as he slipped out of my grasp, and out of the hospital bed.

“Ok.� I said as he leaned down and kissed me on the lips. Lips of magic were all I could think of to describe them. He pecked me twice on the lips before he finally pulled away. Damn him!

“I love you.�

I smiled, “I love you too.� I said as he began to walk towards the door.

“Hey baby?� I called before he opened it.

“Yes?� He said as he turned back to me.

“Do you think you could get here a little early tomorrow so we could go see her together?�

He smiled, “Of course. I’ll be here bright and early.�

“I love you.� I said again.

“I love you too. Sweet dreams.� He said as he flipped off the lights and slipped out of the door.

I feel asleep before I even heard the door close shut.

The next morning I went down to the nursery before Justin arrived. I hadn’t had the chance to spend any time alone with just me and her. The last time I saw her was when everyone was in my room. I think I held her for five minutes during that time before everyone else stole her from me.

“Hello Mrs. McBane. How are you feeling?� asked one of the nurses, Jennifer. She was one of the nurses that helped deliver Megan.

I smiled, “Better. Still a little sore but I suspect that’s nothing unusual?�

She smiled back, “No it’s not. You probably still be a little sore for the next couple of days.�

“Well that’s something to look forward too.� I said sarcastically with a smile, “Is it ok if I hold my baby?�

“Sure. She’s right over here. Follow me.�

I followed her until we reached Megan’s spot. As if she couldn’t get anymore precious? She was just laying there asleep with her mouth protruding open just a little bit.

“Thank you.� I said as I looked up at Jennifer. She smiled at me before she turned to go back to what she was doing before I walked in.

I looked down at her still in awe that I was finally looking at my baby.

It was still surreal to me that just a year ago I was wishing that I had everything that I have now. I have a wonderful fiancée that I love more than I thought possible (considering he was the last person that I suspected), and a beautiful baby girl.

I traced my finger gently down her nose, and across her lips.

She was real.

I mean I knew she was real but touching her just made it even more real to me.

I then rubbed my finger into her palm and she grasped it tightly. She opened her eyes and looked straight up at me. And she did the most amazing thing…she smiled.

Ok so maybe that seems so…corny…to you but I was the first victim of her smile. And to me it was like she knew who I was just by grasping my finger. You could have told me different and I wouldn’t believe you.

A single stray tear slid down my cheek and a placed a hand underneath her body and another hand underneath her head and gently picked her up.

“Hi sweetie.� I whispered softly as I cradled her into my chest. I began to softly bounce her up and down in my arms and walked us both over to a rocking chair to sit in.

“You know who I am don’t you?� I asked as I reached up and wiped a tear off my cheek as I smiled back down at her. “You are so perfect. I hope I can be to you what you’ve been to me for the past nine months. You have been an utter and complete joy. You have brought so much love and happiness into my life and have opened my eyes to things that I should have seen that were right in front of my face.�

Despite how young she was she had a full head of hair. It was a light color but boy could you tell it was there. She definitely had her father’s eyes. She was just beautiful all around. I don’t think we could have done any better if we had actually tried.

My head immediately popped up when I heard footsteps nearing us, and smiled when I saw it was Justin.

He smiled back, “I thought you were going to wait for me?� He said as walked over to me and gave me a small kiss on the lips.

“I wanted to spend some time alone with her before everyone showed up.�

He looked down at Megan with so much love in his eyes. “How’s she doing today?�

“The doctor told me she was looking good. They want to keep her one more night for observation and if everything goes alright we can go home tomorrow.�

He rubbed my head softly, “Good. I miss you at home.� He said as he bent down and kissed Megan on the head, “And I’m sure that someone wants to see their room.�

“Can you believe we did this?�

“It’s still surreal to me.�

“Me too. I would have never thought that the man that I was waiting for was right under my nose.�

“You were just waiting on me to get you knocked up.� He said smiling.

I playfully rolled my eyes, “I’m serious Justin.�

“I know baby. If you would have told me last year that I would fall in love with my best friend I would have laughed in your face.�

I looked down at Megan smiling at her, “I guess we owe it all to this little one.

“I think we do.� He said as he captured my lips with his.

I am completely happy with my life right now. Things couldn’t get any better. I have the man that I love and my new baby girl and honestly that’s all that I’ll ever need.