CHAPTER 1

“Seriously get your ass over here girlie.” Danny Masterson laughed into his cell, “Nah he wouldn’t care”

“I don’t care” Ashton Kutcher said as he accepted the bowl from Justin.

“’Ere you go man” Justin said, blowing smoke rings into the living room.

There was a party going on all around him but sitting on the couch smoking suited him fine. He was tired and feeling more than a little chill from the ‘dro that Ashton had bought.

“Lola Dean is coming over,” Danny announced as he took a long swig of Corona.

“Do I know her?” Ashton asked. He was somewhat worried about his house, which was presently being trashed by the acquaintances-of-friends that had showed up randomly looking to party. He winced when Demi’s Waterford crystal vase wobbled on the tiny end table.

“Remember that old show ‘Making Waves’ she played Jordan, the little surfer girl.”

“Oh yea, yea, yea. I remember her.” Ashton said offhand. “Haven’t seen her in years, where did you meet?”

“At the Cotton Club”

“Oh” Ashton remarked, placing the now empty bowl on the table. He turned to Justin “What’s up with you? This shit hitting you hard.”

“Yeah” Justin said in a far away voice. The pot had made him feel quiet and pensive, thinking about all this crazy shit.

“Heeeeey” Lola Dean strolled into the house and threw herself down next to Danny. “Thanks for letting me come over, Kutch” She said to Ashton. He nodded in response.

“Are you high?” Danny asked her.

Lola brought her knees up to her chest and sat her chin on her knees. “Yeah” She smiled crookedly “It’s dangerous but I love driving high”

“It’s like a game,” Justin giggled. He looked at Lola for the first time, instead of just listening to her. He white blonde hair was wavy and she wearing white terry cloth Juicy Couture shorts and a sheer white v neck t-shirt.

Lola turned to him and smiled, a wide toothy smile that she had made famous at the age of 12 on ‘Making Waves’ “I know”

Justin noticed the yellow WR on her shirt, “Nice shirt,” he commented.

“Thanks” She smiled again.

“He designed it” Ashton said as he walked away, decided it was time to mellow out the party by kicking a few people out.

“No way.” She giggled “And the jeans too” She turned all the way around so all her attention was focused on him. It was meaningless party talk. Nothing too deep or meaningful, nothing about complicated issues or hurtful subjects

“Yup. Me and my friend Trace” He scanned the living room “He’s around here somewhere”

“I’m kinda surprised two guys designed jeans that fit so well.”

“Yea I’ve heard that before”

“Lolita!”

Lola turned her head to where a well known voice had yelled her name. Lindsay Lohan and Wilmer Valderama made there way over to Justin and Lola. Lindsay tripped on the carpet and ended up in Lola’s lap

Wilmer nodded his head at Justin as he pulled Lindsay to her feet.

“Hey hon. What number is that?” She motioned to Lindsay’s drink.

Lindsay shrugged. “I’m gonna check out the hot tub and your ass is coming with me.” Lindsay handed Wilmer her drink and pulled her beach dress over her head “Let’s go!” She took her drink back from Wilmer and pulled Lola to her feet. Lindsay pulled on Lola’s shirt, “Cute suit… let’s see it”

“Girl get offa me” Lola slapped Lindsay’s hand away. “It was nice to meet you, Justin” She quickly turned back to Justin and smiled quickly before slapping Lindsay’s hand away from her shirt again.
“Okay, Okay girl chill” Lola whipped her William Rast shirt over her head and revealed a red and gray Ashley Paige crocheted bikini that had been visible through the shirt. He watched as she grabbed two Corona’s from the cooler before turning a corner to get to the hot tub.

:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:

Two hours later Justin was in the kitchen doing tequila slammers with Trace and Elisha. Leaving the kitchen he made his way to the stairs, wanting a quiet place to chill. He had smoked again and drank more than he should have.

He didn’t dare go into any of the rooms that had locked doors, really not wanting too see what was going on behind them. He stopped and studied the blown up picture of Demi’s Vanity Fair cover, when she was pregnant and had posed nude. He scrunched up his nose and turned away from it. He smiled when he saw Lola in the one room that was open. Without speaking he walked in and laid on the bed. Lola was propped against the headboard, strumming a guitar, making on a tune as she went. They stayed that way for a few minutes before Lola silently handed him the guitar and looked at him expectantly. He strummed a few bars before placing the guitar on the floor next to the bed.

“So you survived La Lohan” He smirked.

She smiled, “Barely” She closed her eyes in an attempt to stop them from watering. They were still bloodshot from smoking again in the hot tub.

“How do you know Danny and Ashton?” Justin asked, not wanting to say anything bad about Lindsay, since they seemed to be unlikely friends.

“I hang out at the Cotton Club sometimes cause its not so much like every other club in LA, only letting in celebrities that they pay to come and give them good publicity.”

“Yea Danny will let anyone in as long they smile at him in line” Justin laughed. “Not that your just anyone” He backtracked.

“Nah I knew what you meant.” She ruffled his hair and giggled at his perturbed expression.

“Hey now” He laughed and slung and arm around her shoulders to pulled her in for a noogie.

Lola laughed and squirmed out of his grasp and held both his hands by his side. “Not nice JT”
She fell back and rested her head against the pillow, closing her eyes “I’m kind loopy from smoking” She whispered. “Hyper and tired as fuck”

Justin assumed her earlier position, propped against the pillows on the headboard. “Yea me too”

Without opening her eyes she wrapped her arms around his waist and rested her head on his stomach “Can we not doing anything tonight, just lay here” She murmured.

“Ummm… sure” Justin said, uncertainly. He took her lead and closed his eyes and feel asleep.

CHAPTER 2

Lazily opening his eyes Justin became aware of everything in stages. First he became aware of the pressure in his bladder, the nausea in his stomach, the dry cotton feeling in his mouth and the pounding in his brain.

Why do I never remember to drink water?

Second he was aware that he was not in his own bed, which was not a shock, he knew where he was. Ashton had parties like last nights all the time and it wasn’t unusual for most of the guests to simply sleep where ever and with whomever they passed out with.

Justin smiled when he remembered he had passed out with Lola, who was MIA at the moment. He slowly remembered the events of last night and everything he knew about Lola Dean… which wasn’t much. He remembered watching her on ‘Making Waves’ when he was about 13. It had been a favorite show of most of the girls on MMC, they would talk about all the time. Whenever he was at one of their houses they would insist on watching it.

He didn’t admit it back then but all those girls got him pretty hooked. It was right up there next to ‘Who’s The Boss?’ in his mind. But at the time he thought it was weird for a boy to watch a soap opera type show so he didn’t advertise it. But he rarely missed and episode, even when he wasn’t at one of the girls houses. He remembered the episode when Lola’s character Jordan had was in a surf competition and her mother showed up drunk, he remembered the episode when Jordan got her period while on the family yacht and her older brother swam to shore to buy her tampons, he remembered the episode when Jordan got dumped by the boy she was dating and she cried to the maid and even the one where the families summer house in St. Thomas burned down and everyone thought that Jordan had been in the fire, of course that had been a season finale and he had to wait the whole summer to find out that Jordan was not dead. The show wasn’t exactly realistic but it had been a major hit. Until it got cancelled after a respectable amount of seasons and all the stars faded into obscurity, bumped down to the C-List and lower. Each person from the show was unable to shake off the character they played in order to further pursue a career. He knew Lola fell into that category; she was C-List at best. In Hollywood she would forever be known as little Jordan Burke from ‘Making Waves’. She was being judged by her 12-year-old self, which wasn’t at all fair because no one wants to be judged by who they were at 12 years old.

Certainly not me Justin thought, ruefully, remembering himself in mouse ears. He made his way downstairs to survey the damage from the party last night and, once he got some coffee in him, help clean it up.

Ashton was in the kitchen attempting to clean up the mess in there before tackling the living room, sitting room and deck all of which were worse than the previous. It was late in the day so most of the stragglers at left, getting calls from there agents and dashing off to castings without so much as a “I’ll be back later to help clean.”

Justin stepped into the kitchen “Mornin’”

“Afternoon” Ashton laughed and pointed to the clock on the microwave- 12: 35.

Justin made a face, “Once I get some coffee I’ll help you out”

“Coffee’s no good for hangovers”

“Neither’s cleaning but I need one to do the other.” He said moving around the island to grab a large mug and pour himself a cup of the coffee Ashton had already made. “Where’s Danny… and Wilmer… and Lola?” Justin asked as he leaned against the counter.

“Danny’s still asleep that douche, Wilmer is at a photo shoot and Lolita went with Lindsay at the ass crack of dawn to some spa in Beverly Hills” Ashton informed him, then smiled slyly and raising his eyebrows, “I’m surprised you didn’t hear Lindsay wake her up”

Justin looked at him sourly, “If you got something to say man just say it,” he grumbled then half smiled to let Ashton know he was kidding. “We were talking bull shit and passed out. Nothing major.” He left out her last comment before drifting off to sleep, already chalking it up to be from the weed and liquor.

Ashton grabbed a monogrammed dishtowel from the draw next to Justin to clean up with.

“What the fuck is that?” Justin grabbed the dishtowel from his hands “Dude?”

“Demi” Ashton said as a form of explanation. And with that the subject of Lola was dropped.

:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:

“So that was a little surprising this morning” Lindsay turned her head towards Lola as they both lay down and waited for their respective masseur.

“Hmmm” Lola murmured in agreement “No biggie actually. I was chillin’ upstairs and he came in, high as a mother fucker”

“Like you weren’t” Lindsay interrupted laughing. The two masseurs walked back in and the conversation halted for a second before picking right back up.

“Didn’t say that. I was in a weird mood, that shit was strong.” Lola laughed then groaned when the masseur hit a spot of particular tension. “But yea so I we just talked a little bit and fell asleep.”

“That’s it” Lindsay sounded a bit disgusted and more than a little disappointed, ”How boring”

“I don’t know. I mean I would like to get to know him but I don’t want him to think that I just because of what knowing him would do for my career…”

“I don’t think he would think that” Lindsay interrupted but as soon as she said it she knew it was a lie. She knew how Hollywood worked and she knew that Lola knew too- maybe better. It was all about what can you do for me and latching onto coattails and all that petty shallow shit. She was guilty for it in her early years in Hollywood- hell who wasn’t. Personally she liked that Lola, no matter how shitty the outlook seemed to be of anyone casting her as anything but a surfer girl, didn’t want to latch onto Justin or herself or any other of either equally as famous and successful friends. That was one of the reasons Lindsay hung out with her in private as well as in public. Plus that fact that she was kind of magnetic, you couldn’t help but smile when she smiled or laugh when she laughed or get crazy hyper and do something nutty when she did.

“He would cause he’s so fucking perfect and he doesn’t need flawed little me in his life fucking it up” Lola sighed.

“Please” she scoffed “he… is… not…perfect” she stressed and scrunched up her nose.

“No no I mean like career wise. I thought about this last night, everyone in this business fails at the very least once. Actors make movies that flop, singers make albums that don’t sell and everyone gets caught with their proverbial pants down by the media and that brings them down a notch makes them more real. But seriously think about it… what has Justin Timberlake failed at? Nothing. Not anything when he was in-“ she paused, not wanting to outright let the masseurs know who they were gossiping about, you never can be to safe. “his band, not when he went out on a supposed limb and went solo, not when he went out on a another supposed limb and started acting… He’s perfect at what he does.”

“Ok so that doesn’t mean shit and you know it. It means he has good people backing him up. Good agents, managers, publicists, producers, directors, blah blah blah. It means he doesn’t make any impulsive moves in this business, he waits until the time is exactly right and bam he knocks you over with the smallest thing. And he has flaws… everyone does.”

“Yeah yeah buried deep down inside never to be seen. Anyway I still programmed my number into his phone for good measure.” Lola laughed then got serious, “Is that weird? A little stalkery maybe?”

“Justin’s into stalking… didn’t you see his video” Lindsay joked. If the masseurs didn’t know who they were talking about before they did now but both girls were almost certain they wouldn’t say anything. The particular spa had too many celebrity clients to go out and spill the beans to any gossip column about anything that went on here. They knew what would happen if a story ever ran that said, “Big celebrity A and ever bigger celebrity B were caught at the Beverly Hills Hotel Spa talking candidly about…” That would get out to every celebrity and everyone that worked for said celebrity and they would lose the type of business that made them so famous in the first place. “Kidding. Kidding. I’m sure he wouldn’t think that, he’s not that cocky, besides your friends with a bunch of his friends, they’d tell him otherwise if he did come to think asinine conclusion.”

“Well the ball’s in his court, if he calls he doesn’t see me as a leech and if he doesn’t call…” Lola’s voice kind of trailed off kind of sadly. She didn’t like the topic she had started to think about, it simply bummed her out too severely. So she did what she always did and changed the subject to one of more importance- what they were doing that night.

CHAPTER 3

Cleaning Ashton’s had taken longer than he thought. Not that he had important plans today, he only had a few radio call in’s and some stupid paperwork about what he liked to do in his downtime for some bopper magazine.

Ha what would happen if I told them what I did with my downtime last night? They’d shit a brick.

Stuck in traffic on the 101 he impulsively decided to pass the time by calling Lance. He had talked to JC a few days ago and Chris last week so Lance was next on the constant call back list he had. Scrolling through the L’s in his address book he found Lance’s name, right above Lola Dean’s. He smiled at the gesture and quickly contemplated calling her to chat but remembered that she was at a spa and probably wouldn’t appreciate a call while she was taking a mud bath or being wrapped in seaweed or whatever other weird only in LA stuff she was having done to her body.

Her body. The thought of it was enough to make him forget about catching up with Lance. So in theory he hadn’t actually seen much of it but it was obvious that the California girl had kept up with the surfing all these years. Or at least some form of athletic exercise. In Hollywood everything tending to be mostly smoke and mirrors- especially ones body. Just like the rest of the world everyone in La La Land had a well-hidden flaw that they didn’t want the world to see but unlike the rest of the world but they had the privilege of having said flaws erased by make-up, airbrush, retouching, and computer manipulation. But no, not Lola, her body had been 100% hers.

It was also kind of sad on some levels, the lengths she was forced to go to in order to get back what she so desperately wanted- her career and in turn her life. He had dated gorgeous famous women who didn’t have to work half as hard as Lola probably did to get ten times the recognition. Britney could put out whatever bull shit product she wanted and still not truly fail. Prime example, her attempt at acting or her attempt to become a restaurateur. Both ventures had got her a lot of money but were ultimately failures. Alyssa, who had seemingly done the impossible in Hollywood with little to no effort and something Lola was currently trying to do- leave behind a famous childhood character, Sam Micelli and have an equally successful adult character, Phoebe Halliwell.

His train of thought about Lola in comparison to his ex’s was interrupted by a honking horn. The traffic in front of him was moving again.

:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:

Lola stepped out of the shower into the steamy bathroom. She had just come from the beach and was now getting to go out with Lindsay for a girl’s night. They had decided to go to dinner and then out for drinks. And like any girl’s night that twenty-something-year-old girls would have, they would of course be meeting up with guys later in the night.

She grabbed the Missoni silk slip dress she had picked out for that night and held it up for examination before slipping it on. She sprayed in some Frederic Fekkai hair crap that she couldn’t live without and left it to dry naturally. The intercom next to her bed beeped just as she finished, “Bitch let us in” Lindsay’s voice crackled over the intercom and Lola buzzed her in. Soon she heard the sounds of two pairs of shoes on her hardwood stairs- one obviously stilettos and the other flats.

“Yo bitch” Nicole Richie shouted. “Let’s go!” Nicole catapulted herself onto Lola’s large bed and started bouncing up and down, giggling while she did little acrobatic moves.

“I’m borrowing your Chloe top,” Lindsay shouted from inside Lola’s closet. Lola looked up from the mirror and smiled at the scene that had overtaken her bedroom in less than a minute. Her crazy friends always made her smile a little even when she was a little down. She had been feeling a type of pathetic girl sadness that could only stem from the fact that Justin hadn’t called. Granted the rational part of her said that she had only given him her phone number last night but the slightly irrational, completely girlie part of her said he hadn’t called immediately upon discovering her number and she pouted over that all day.

But her pouting was put on hold for the time. They had decided to go to Koi for sushi and then out to The Spider Club, where Nicole’s boyfriend, Adam was DJing for the night.

“Okay I’m good” Lindsay walked out of Lola’s closet in Lola’s canary yellow Chloe camisole. Each girl grabbed her respective “it bag” and hopped into Lindsay’s BMW.

“Hi George” Lola smiled at Lindsay’s bodyguard/ driver for the night.

Arriving at Koi they all stepped out of the car while George went to park. Koi being a place where many celebrities went it was safe to assume that the few photographers that were there were not specifically for Lindsay or Nicole but that their arrival was definitely a plus for the photographers. So they snapped away at the three girls while they tried to appear nonchalant to the cameras and keep happy smiles on their faces.

A few hours later they left the restaurant happy from the sushi they had eaten and the saki they had drank.

Yes, a night with the girls was just what Lola needed.

:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:

So his easy day of radio call in’s and teenybopper questionnaires had been interrupted by his manager, Johnny insisting that he had told Justin the interview with Z100 was an in studio interview and to get his ass on the plane that had been chartered specifically for him. So here he was on a flight to New York City with his cell phone in his lap, pouting at it. What good was it to call Lola if he was going to be 3,000 miles away, not to mention that he was currently 30,000 feet in the air. No, he was not going to grow some cojones and call her when he was jetting across the country. So it would just have to wait till he was back in LA.

He pouted again when he thought about waiting. He wanted to simply call her up and ask her out, like a normal person. He didn’t want to postpone it or even deny it for the few days that he would be in New York. A normal man wouldn’t have to do that, they would simply call Lola up and ask her to dinner and a movie or dinner and dancing or dinner and something else that involved them spending time together. Normal men worried about ‘Do I have too much cologne on’ or ‘Is she going to like the restaurant I picked’ or ‘Is she going to let me kiss her‘ but he had to worry about ‘Is someone going to interrupt us for an autograph’ or ‘Is somebody going to take a picture of this’ or ‘Am I going to get a call from Johnny and have to leave’. Bullshit. Fucking Bullshit.

But he had to worry about those things. They were his reality. So he would have to wait.

:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:

Lola groped her bed stand until she felt her offending ringing cell phone.

“Hello” Lola said into the phone, voice husky with sleep. She didn’t bother looking at the screen to see who was calling. She already knew that the only person who seemed to have the uncanny sense of always calling when she was asleep- Ruby, her agent. First name only. Like Madonna or Cher.

“LOLA DARLING!” Ruby, shouted into the phone. Dull roar being her inside voice Lola pulled the phone away from her ear. She should know better than to put the phone up to her ear when Ruby was talking. She could completely picture Ruby at the very moment. Cell phone pressed between her ear and shoulder, cigarette in one hand, drink in the other, wearing one of the more hideous pantsuits Versace had come up with in some horrid color that should only be used for highlighters.

“Hello Ruby, to what do I owe this phone call.” Despite her eccentricities Lola was always polite to her agent. After all it was Ruby who would go to bat for her and get her the role that would launch her comeback. Not that she had ever truly gone away…

“GREAT NEWS LOLA!” Without waiting for Lola to say anything “VH-1 WANTS TO DO A SPECIAL ‘MAKING WAVES- WHERE ARE THEY NOW’ AND THEY WANT TO INTERVIEW YOU HONEY!”

Lola groaned, loudly “How is that a good thing?” she demanded. All current thoughts of being nice to Ruby out of her head. If Ruby couldn’t see how awful doing a Where Are They Now would be then maybe she wasn’t the spectacular agent Lola had thought. A spectacular agent would have tore the suits at VH-1 a new asshole for even considering Lola the type of has been that would do that show and demand that they make it up to her by giving Lola her own show.

“WELL IT COULD GET YOUR FOOT BACK IN THE DOOR, CASTING AGENTS WOULD SEE IT, PEOPLE WOULD REALIZE YOU AREN’T DEAD!” And like any other agent in Hollywood Ruby was blunt- almost hurtfully so. “THIS IS ONE OF THE BEST OFFERS I’VE GOTTEN FOR YOU IN AGES, YOU SHOULD DO IT!”

“No Rubes, forget about it. Thank you for thinking of me but I’m not interested.” Lola said quietly and hung up the phone. Her sad mood from last night was back but for an entirely different reason.

CHAPTER 4

It had been 4 days.

Lola had officially been rejected.

Rejection wasn’t something she liked but it was something she could handle. She had handled perfectly well almost her entire adult life. Really no one should be in show business if the couldn’t handle the copious amounts of rejection that was dished out daily. Whether it was the studio head telling you your movie was going straight to DVD or the fan on the street criticizing what you looked like without makeup, rejection was everywhere. But rejection was as familiar to her as happiness would be to any other poor shmuck. Yes, rejection she could deal with.

Awkwardness she could not.

And in this particular situation the awkwardness that she would no doubt feel the next time she saw Justin was driving her crazy with doubt. And doubt lead to insecurity and insecurity lead to self pity and so on and so on till she was drowning in so many emotions she couldn’t even identify most of them.

But today her personal feelings were going to be channeled for the greater good.

Lola had an audition!

It was Ruby’s sad attempt at a peace offering. It was rare that Ruby would attempt to win over Lola. Usually it was the other way around and they both knew it. So Lola took the olive branch that was being offered and sent one of her own back- she agreed to do it.

It wasn’t Spielberg or Scorsese that was for damn sure. It was some stupid teen movie and she was actually on the fence about whether or not she wanted to even be in it. It was bound to get poor reviews from the critics but it would make money and the public would take notice of her again. The fact that she was in it would probably be a major selling point of the movie but she was debating whether or not she really wanted to be a part of something that the critics were inevitably going to harpoon. In reality she wanted to audition, land the lead and politely decline the offer. They would beg her, offer her more money but she would decline again. The casting agent would be so impressed by her though he would remember her for a future project and cast her in the next Oscar-worthy motion picture. She would be the underdog in the category of course but because of her stunning portrayal of some real life drug addict or prostitute she would win the Oscar and her comeback would be golden.

Being an actress she often made up short little scenarios in her head. Little movies of how important events in her life would pan out. She was always the star and always the winner. Rarely did her personal motion pictures pan out but what kind of actress would she be if she didn’t live half in her own head.

The kind that doesn’t nail stupid bullshit roles, that’s what kind… Lola thought with a smile.

:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:

4 days after Lola had coyly slipped her number into his Sidekick and he was almost positive he had made the wrong choice by waiting to call her. It hadn’t occurred to him that he would look like an asshole. Or so Rachel, his cousin/personal assistant had so sweetly pointed out to him.

“It’s cute how you know nothing about women,” she had said when he told her that he was waiting till he was on California soil before calling Lola. It annoyed him to no end that she said it without even looking up from her magazine, like his stupidity and ignorance was no big deal.

It was not cute how he knew nothing about women. Sure he could spit a smooth game to some groupie in a club but when it came straight down to the in’s and out’s of the female mind he was baffled. To him the excuse ‘we weren’t in the same time zone’ was a perfectly valid and forgivable excuse.

But Rachel has condescendingly told him. “Lola’s not gonna care that you are 3,000 miles away. The only thing going through her head is ‘He didn’t call’. Period. That’s it.”

“Not every women is as needy and emotional as you Rachel.” He was grasping at straws, he hated to be wrong.

“No maybe not, but Lola is” She put her magazine down and now looked him, “She is an actress, all she has is her emotions. Think about every actress you’ve meet, you always know exactly what they are thinking and feeling cause they wear their emotions on their sleeve.”

The fact that she was making sense was only adding to his annoyance, “Well fuck”

Rachel picked her magazine back up and continued reading, “Nicely put”

:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:

The awkwardness that set in the second she stepped through the casting agents door was almost unbearable. She wanted to tell them she was just kidding and turn around and leave. But she didn’t, her determination made her stay.

Hindsight is 20/20…

Trust your instincts…

And all that proverbial mantras that she should have listened to instead of standing rooted in her spot. Because when she attempted to read her lines as Becky, the school outcast who was secretly pretty if she would simply take off her glasses, she had been interrupted.

“That will be all Jord- I mean Lola” The director had said to her, looking down at her resume. The slip was obviously intentional seeing as he was looking at her name when he said it but another thing she could handle was the little Hollywood men who overcompensated for there tiny pee-pee’s making movie about the girls they couldn’t have in high school. She knew the drill, the bigger the budget the smaller the pee-pee.

Lola had every intention of stopping at the Coffee Bean and Tea Leaf before making her way home but she got lost in her thoughts and drove straight past it. Namely on her mind was Justin Timberlake. Her actual crush on him had developed by hearing stories about him from her guy friends. His charity work, his heartbreak (what girl could resist the desire to help a broken man), his success all told through the eyes of friends had put the schoolgirl notion of romance into her head. She hadn’t had a crush on anyone since, probably before she was famous but she didn’t know Justin very well, if at all, so it was more of an infatuation with the image he displayed than true full-blown feelings for the guy. It was feelings that could only come from having meeting him once and having two chit chatty conversations with him.

Who was Justin Timberlake?

Fuck if she knew…

:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:

Another one of Ashton’s party was in full swing.

He was in his usual spot on the couch, chilling out with a Bud. He was completely toxin free tonight, opting instead to observe the antics of his drunken friends, drunken friends of friends and the drunken people who worked for them. It was the pages of US Weekly on parade throughout the entire house. The Bush twins were upstairs, sans Secret Service, Paris Hilton was dancing on the dining room table, and Mary Kate Olsen was eyeing the In-N-Out Burger some guy was currently munching on.

Hours had gone bye and still no sign of Lola. Lindsay came with Wilmer and Nicole came with her boyfriend, Adam but Lola was MIA. He contemplated asking one of them where she was but he was too chicken shit to deal with the giggling and the inevitable “why do you ask’s?” that were sure to come. All the ballsy things he had done in his life and he was afraid to talk to two twenty-something-year-old girls about their best friend.

As if his thinking had personified in front of him Lindsay Lohan sat down in the recliner next to him. He nodded his head hello to her but received the look of death as she pointedly turned her back to him. What the fuck was her problem?

When she finished talking to some PA to one of the celebs around here she made a point to turn back and face him full on. She leaned in really close to him, partly because it was the only way that she would be heard properly over the pulsating music and partly because she didn’t want anyone to eavesdrop on their conversation

“Lola Dean is my best friend,” she hissed at him “And I know perfectly well what you think of her and that makes you an asshole in my book” She stood up and went to walk away but without thinking Justin grabbed her hand.

“What are you talking about?” he said as he stood.

“Why didn’t you call her?” She answered a question with a question.

“How did you know I didn’t call her?” The conversation of questions was confusing him more and more.

“She’s my best friend” Lindsay stated again “Girls talk”

“Look let me explain-“ Justin started but was swiftly cut off.

“Don’t bother. Lola is the most real person you will ever meet. She is not some superficial leech looking to latch onto someone with success. And the fact that you think that makes you an asshole.” She went to leave but turned around and looked him square in the eye, “Was that clear enough for you.” And with that she walked away, leaving him to stare after her.

Women he thought and rolled his eyes. But as he did that another thought popped into his head, If Lindsay thought that he saw Lola like that did Lola think the same thing?

CHAPTER 5

I didn’t want it anyway, she kept telling herself. But here she was in sweats and a t-shirt, lounging on her couch watching the Daily Show and gorging herself on popcorn. Her Maltese poodle, Holly was curled up at her feet and every now and then would look up at her owner with sad eyes. Lola was depressed about the way the audition had gone. Not cry-all-the-time, drink-the-pain-away, slit-your-wrists depressed just watch-a-chick-flick, buy-something-expensive-and-unnecessary, eat-something-unhealthy depressed. Tomorrow she would be over the whole thing but right now she was feeling sorry for herself.

She had talked to Ashton earlier and he had told her about the party he was having that night and also told her she was more than welcome to stop by. Then when Nicole had called and said that she was going to be going to Ashton’s Lola briefly thought about stopping by. Then quickly dismissed the idea, she wasn’t up for being social and she really was content to veg on the couch with Orville Redenbacher. There was also the fact that Justin would most likely be at Ashton’s and she didn’t need or want the bad vibes she was sure she would pick up from him if she went to the party. She had all her own bad vibes, thank you very much.

:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:

Navigating the roads in the lower part of the Hollywood Hills was not something Justin was familiar with. The people he associated himself with lived high up in the Hills. It was a status thing he supposed, much like a totem pole. The more successful you were the higher up in the Hollywood Hills you lived, more secluded from the commoners. But after his conversation with Lindsay the thought of Lola believing that he thought of her as less than himself was plaguing him and he decided he just had to remedy it.

Justin knew exactly where Lola lived; he had known where she lived even before knowing her. That was one of the great things about the Hollywood Hills; everyone knew where everyone lived, regardless of whether or not they knew them personally.

Her house was not huge. Not by Hollywood standards but it was decent. In any other city it would more than likely be the nicest house around but in LA it was mediocre. His own Spanish style monstrosity of a house looked a bit frivolous in comparison, seeing as him and Lola both lived alone. But even despite the size, she had most likely paid quite a bit for the house. He wondered where the money came from if she hadn’t worked in years.

The house was quite approachable. There were no security guards or gates surrounding the property, unlike his own house. He pulled up the circular driveway and parked in front of the door. There was a small intercom next to the door and he knew it was better to page Lola through that than knock on the door. Knocking would prove to be fruitless because if she were upstairs in a house like this she would never hear him.

“Can I help you?” Lola’s voice crackled over the intercom. He hadn’t realized the call button was so sensitive and that his light hesitant touch would set it off.

“Hey Lola, it’s Justin… uh Justin Timberlake”

Lola was shocked to say the least. Justin Timberlake was the last person she expected to be at her door. “Hold on” she said into the intercom. She then ran into the bathroom to attempt to do something with her appearance, slipping a little on the hardwood floors as she went. She splashed cold water on her face, pinched her cheeks and smeared on some Rosebud Salve before deciding she had made him wait long enough and ran to get the door.

“Hey” she said, slightly out of breath from all the rushing.

“Hey, can I come in?” Justin motioned into the house.

“Oh yeah” Lola giggled nervously “Of course” she stepped out of the way and opened the door farther. She shut the door and turned to him, “Well this is quite a surprise, what brings you by?”

“Uh well” Justin scratched the back of his neck, something he did subconsciously when he was nervous. “I was at Ashton’s and you didn’t show up” Lola was walking into the living, motioning for him to follow and have a seat, “Then… ummm… I was talking to Lindsay and she… well she said some stuff and I came over here to…” Yup nervousness had taken over and he was unable to get a sentence out and voice his thoughts. To make matters worse Lola was just staring at him, not saying anything or showing any sign of listening to what he was babbling about in the slightest. Taking a deep breath and a moment to collect his thoughts he blurted out, “I wanted you to know I was in New York”

“Huh” Lola looked at him confused, it was not what she had expected him to say.

“I’ve been in New York for the past few days” He scratched his neck again, “that’s why I didn’t call you.”

“Oh” She looked uncomfortable with where the conversation was going but now that he had found his voice and gathered his thoughts he was going to spit out what he had come to say.

“I was going to call you but then I thought that you wouldn’t want to hear from me if I was 3,000 miles away then I was rudely informed by my cousin that I‘m dumbass when it comes to this kind of stuff and then I was informed that I am an asshole by Lindsay tonight.” Justin trailed off, caught up in his thoughts, “though I do think that was a little much but I guess she was looking out for you but I’m sorry and I should have called you.”

“K” Lola said simply and turned back to the TV, offering him the bowl of popcorn as she did so.

Justin wasn’t prepared for her to say ok and be fine with it. He was preparing himself to talk this out like he had to do in every other relationship he had been in. Britney had always wanted to talk about there problems and Alyssa just wanted to talk about everything but he was quickly learning that Lola wasn’t like everyone else.

“So what did you do in New York?” Lola asked.

“Well I thought I just had to call into Z100 and be interviewed that way but apparently I missed the part where my manager said I was doing an in studio interview.”

“Do you have a new single coming out?”

“New single followed by a new album”

Lola smiled her big toothy smile “Well it’s about time.” She smacked him in the arm and giggled.

“What about you? Anything on the horizon?”

And Lola was back to feeling uncomfortable. None of her other friends ever asked her about her work, because she didn’t have any coming in and it was a sore subject. “Umm I thought I might but no” she said quietly. “It was for some dumb teen movie, so no biggie.”

Foot in mouth again Timberlake

They sat in silence while watching Steve Colbert’s report the fake news. Every now and then the silence would be broken when one of them laughed but for the most part they stayed silent. The silence was comfortable, which was surprising considering they were new friends and vaguely interested in the other one. When Steve Colbert was over Lola flipped through the stations before deciding on ESPN where the Dodgers were playing the Yankees.

As the announcer all but yelled that Jeter had been walked to first Justin’s mind wandered away from the game and back to the one place his mind had wandered to a lot over the past few days- Lola. Her signals the night he met her were so obvious but now she didn’t seem as interested, she was acting distant and unresponsive. The chances that he would make it out of the dugout were looking slimmer and slimmer.

The silence as well as Justin’s thoughts was broken when his cell phone rang, Ashton’s name appearing on the screen.

“Hey” Justin answered the phone.

“Where are you?” Ashton questioned. Justin could hear the music from the party in the background.

“At Lola’s”

“Huh,” Ashton mostly likely couldn’t hear him because of the background noise on his end. “Come back and bring whoever your with too. It’s a party! WooHoo!” Justin closed the phone, ending the call and put the phone back in his pocket.

“Was that Kutch?” Lola asked. Lola asked while she grabbed a handful of popcorn from the bowl on her lap.

“Yeah he wanted me to go back to the party and bring you with me” Justin leaned over and grabbed a handful of popcorn. “I don’t really want to go but if you want to I will.”

Lola smiled widely and Justin didn’t really know why she was smiling, but it was directed at him so he smiled back and slipped his arm around her shoulders. She didn’t shrug it off or even flinch she simply snuggled a little closer to him and turned her attention back to the game.

He was out of the dugout and back in the game.

CHAPTER 6

It had been a little over a week since Justin had unexpectedly showed up at Lola’s house. They didn’t do anything that first night except watch the ball game and fall asleep on the couch together. The morning after she cooked them both breakfast and they snuggled on the couch, two days later they went to Geisha House for dinner and then to the Laugh Factory to see the Dane Cook show, and last night they went for sushi at Koi and dancing at Hyde.

This morning Lola awoke to her cell phone ringing. She blindly groped her bedside table to pick it up.

Without even looking at the screen, “’Ello Ruby” Lola murmured, her voice husky with sleep.

“DAH-LING IT HAS BEEN SO LONG” Ruby dragged her words out whenever she talked. It was one of the many annoying habits Ruby had. “I HAVE GOLD IN MY HANDS BABY… GOLD!” She screamed. “I’M ON MY WAY TO THE BEVERLY HILLS HOTEL MEET ME THERE.” Ruby hung up the phone before Lola could even confirm that she would be there.

Stretching her entire body and sighing she got out of bed and making her way to her closet Lola chose a black and white houndstooth L.A.M.B. cardigan, a thin silver tank top, a black La Perla bra and gray straight leg Tsubi jeans. Driving to the Beverly Hills Hotel in her too-big-for-her-tiny-ass-SUV took a little longer than it should have because of the Los Angeles bumper-to-bumper traffic.

“Lola!” Ruby shouted across The Polo Lounge and frantically waved the hand that wasn’t currently holding her drink above her head.

Waiting for Lola when she got to the table was the brunch that she always ordered when she came to The Polo Lounge, Dutch Apple Pancakes and a Belini. Ruby also had her usual brunch, a vodka martini with an olive. Ruby was dressed in one of her many bright Versace pantsuits and she had more than a small amount of her red lipstick on her slightly crooked teeth. In front of her on the table was a stack of what Lola assumed was scripts.

As Ruby talked and drank Lola ate her breakfast, “Baby you are doing so good, I don’t know where this is coming from but I keep getting requests for you!” Lola vaguely wondered where Ruby was from because she had a horrible accent, which sounded like a Long Island accent but she wasn’t sure. “This,” Ruby handed her a script “is about a high school cheerleader that witnesses a murder, Rob Schneider has already signed on to play the cheerleading coach/undercover FBI agent.”

“Not interested” Lola said, handing the script right back to Ruby. This meeting was going downhill.

“Okay well this is about a girl who switched bodies with her baby sister-”

“No” Lola spat out. The offers were getting more and more ridiculous and she was getting more and more annoyed with Ruby for even considering her for these roles.

“This last one is about an alien-“

“Nooo” Lola drug out the word out until Ruby put the script back on the table.

Ruby seemed to ignore what Lola was saying because she slide the stack of scripts across the table towards Lola. Lola’s knotted her eyebrows and pursed her lips in anger and passed the scripts back towards Ruby.

“Look Lola” Ruby’s voice suddenly became cold and steely, a tone Lola hadn’t ever heard from Ruby, “The agency has been putting a lot of pressure on everyone to cut the dead weight. And I’ll level with you these are the only scripts in months that have come in. If you don’t take one of these roles we have nothing for you and we will have to let you go.”

“Let me go?” Lola’s face paled as thoughts of her future ran through her head. How she would fade farther into obscurity without an agent to guide her, how no other agents would pick her up as a client with the direction her career was going and the perception that everyone had of her in the business. But dammit she was Lola Dean, and she was a fighter. There was a scene in a movie she had once saw where they told a story about two mice who fell into a vat of milk, the first mouse gave up and drown but the second mouse treading and turned the milk into cream and crawled out. Lola Dean was that second damn mouse.

“Fine Ruby,” Lola shoved the scripts back across the table at a shocked looking Ruby, “you have been my agent for years but lately you have done nothing but continue to allow my career to flounder. So you’re fired.” Lola noisily shoved her chair back and stormed out of The Polo Lounge.

She waited impatiently for the valet to get her car Lola threw herself in the car and drove towards home, tears clouding her vision the whole way. As soon as she pulled into her own driveway the tears started flowing faster and heavier. Resting her head on the steering wheel she cried and hiccupped for a good 10 minutes before frantically fishing her cell phone from her bag and dialing Justin.

“Hey” Justin said softly into the phone.

“Are you busy?” Lola asked, briefly regretting calling on such an emotionally charged whim. It was too soon in their relationship to be relying on him this much, to show him this side of her and let herself be this vulnerable in front of him. As hard as she tried to hold her tears in she couldn’t and they all came out in the form of a large hiccup and then rushed out before she could attempt to stop them.

“Hey…” Justin said soothingly and waited to see if she would calm down. She didn’t, “Hey…” Justin said louder, getting more and more confused as to what was going on, “I’m not busy, what’s wrong?”

“Can you come over?” Lola whimpered into the phone, momentarily gaining her composure and getting out of the car and into the house. She threw herself onto the stool that sat around the island in the middle of her kitchen and rested her head on the cool granite.

“I’ll be right there” Justin assured into the phone before hanging up.

:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:

Justin looked over from the kitchen at Lola who was asleep on the couch, having cried, screamed and worried herself to sleep.

Justin got to Lola’s about 20 minutes after she called. He buzzed the intercom and knocked a few times but she didn’t come to the door. He ended up going in through the garage door that had been left open. Looking around the first level of the house he saw that she was in the kitchen surrounded by papers and frantically flipping through a thick tattered address book. Her face was tear stained and blotchy and her eyes were red rimmed and bloodshot but at this precise moment she wasn’t crying. Which he was thankful for because crying was difficult for him to cope with.

Sitting down in front of her he grabbed her hands away from the pages of the address book, forcing her to look up at him. “Hey, what happened? Tell me what’s going on?”

“I have to find Ari Emmanuel’s number.” Lola said as she pulled her hands out of Justin’s and grabbed a stack of papers that were sitting on the floor near her.

Justin took the papers out of her hands and put them right back where Lola had picked them up from, “Isn’t Ari Emmanuel an agent, why do you need Ari Emmanuel’s number?”

Lola looked at him quickly with strong eyes and picked up the papers that he had taken from her, “I need Ari Emmanuel’s number because I got dropped from my agency today and Ari is the best agent in the business.” Lola crumbled up a paper and threw it into a steadily growing pile of papers that had accumulated in the corner of the kitchen.

“You got dropped” Justin stared at her incredulously, “Lo…” Justin watched her for a moment as she frantically searched through the papers “Lo look at me” Justin tilted her chin up to look him in the eyes and watched as her eyes welled up with tears and she threw herself into his arms, knocking him back onto his hands. Her tiny body shock with tears, hiccups and deep shaky breaths. Wedging one hand under her leg and the other around her back he picked her up off the floor of the kitchen and carried her into the living room and onto the couch. Lola tucked her head in the crook of his neck as she continued to cry and whimper. Not knowing exactly what to do Justin simply rubbed her back hoping it would sooth her.

Her tears quieted and finally stopped and her breathing leveled out. Lola picked her head up and looked at Justin. “I’m okay,” she whispered.

Looking into her eyes Justin didn’t see that she was ok but he did see the determination to act like she was okay, “You’re okay” He smiled weakly and put his arm around her shoulder, pulling her into his chest. They sat in pensive silence until Justin heard her breathing slow. Checking to see if she had indeed fallen asleep he unwrapped himself from her, he laid her down on the couch and made his way into the kitchen.

Searching until he found a trash bag he went about cleaning up the discarded papers and the other miscellaneous things like business cards that did not have what Lola was looking for on them. Grabbing the stacks of paper that were on the floor and on the granite covered island he proceeded to sort through them looking for Ari Emmanuel’s direct number.

After about a half an hour of looking Justin gave up and dialed Johnny’s number on his cell phone.

“Hey Johnny, do me a favor”

“Sure, what?” Johnny asked

“I need Ari Emmanuel’s number for Lola.” Justin stacked all the papers, business cards, post its and scraps of paper on the counter as he waited for Johnny to get the number.

“Ah here it is” Johnny said more to himself than to Justin. Justin wrote it down on a piece of paper that was sitting by the phone before saying goodbye to Johnny and hanging up. This would be a pleasant surprise for Lola. It was to be expected that being dropped by her agency would be difficult on anyone actress but Justin had a feeling that it was especially hard on Lola because she wanted so badly to succeed and had yet to do that.

Making two cups of hot chocolate Justin went into the living room to wake Lola up. “Lo… Lo… wake up” Justin crotched down and gently shook her awake.

Sitting up sleepily Justin handed Lola the hot chocolate and sat down next to her. He gave her a minute to wake up and to enjoy her cocoa before announcing, “I got Ari’s number” Lola looked at him, shock in her eyes and on her face but he decided to go on, “I looked through the papers some but didn’t find it so I called my manager, Johnny and he gave it to me.”

Shock still registered on her face before she tensed up and took a sip of her drink, “You didn’t have to do that.” Lola looked at him sideways, “I could have gotten it myself”

Confused as to why she wasn’t smiling, why she wasn’t happily kissing him all over and jumping for joy, “I know I didn’t have to do it, I wanted to help you out.”

“I didn’t ask for your help” Lola said with indignation and turned her entire body so she was facing him. “I could have found it myself.”

“You called me over,” Justin said, defensively. This was not going how he had pictured at all. “I thought you wanted my help.”

“I…” Lola started, “I want you to be here for me, but I don’t want your charity. I don’t need it.” Lola hung her head and looked at her hands, wringing them together.

“I know you don’t need it,” Justin said grabbing her hands and placing a kiss on her forehead. “Think of this as a business transaction.”

Lola half smiled and looked up at him and he handed her the piece of paper with Ari’s number. Looking at it for a second she pressed a quick peck on Justin’s lips and whispered, “Sorry” against them.

“Don’t even think about it Lo.” Justin captured her lips again and she sighed in this cute little way that he was noticing she did whenever she gave into his kisses. Lola grabbed onto the front of his shirt and pulled him with her as she lay down on the couch. Their legs tangled together and Justin rested the full weight of his body against her. His hands found their way into her hair while her hands slid over his shoulders, down his back and into his back pockets. Lazily kissing and touching each other Justin and Lola cemented the beginnings of their fledgling relationship.

CHAPTER 7

Lola walked into Koi, a few minutes late for her dinner meeting with Ari Emmanuel. The usual LA excuse- traffic was a bitch. Knowing downtown LA on a Friday night she really should have thought to leave the house earlier but she had been on the phone with Justin, venting some of her nerves. He had told her about when he had been in a similar situation, the infamous Lou Pearlman/RCA vs. *N SYNC court battle. He told her how the entire group had to start over when it came to management. Each and every guy, including Justin, who had only been 18 at the time, thought that their careers would be over. The would be flash-in-the-pan, one hit wonders, forever the butt of future jokes. But in a story of triumph that would be mentioned in every interview *N SYNC would do in the future they had prevailed through the situation. And weirdly it made her feel better about her own situation. *N SYNC had gone on to have great and long careers, and Justin and JC achieved even more solo success after the *N SYNC hiatus.

But this evening was about Lola and her own personal battle. Apparently it was very hard to get a meeting with Ari but with some shameless flirting she had been able to get his assistant to squeeze in a dinner meeting. She had heard stories about Ari Emmanuel, how he was ‘the biggest douchebag in show business’ but she had also heard about how he went to bat for his clients against studios, salary demands, casting issues and artistic differences. She hoped that the latter would be true for her.

Smoothing out her high waisted brown skirt she took a deep breath and asked the hostess where Ari Emmanuel’s table was. The hostess quickly looked up and pointed to the door that lead to one of Koi’s private rooms. Koi was one of many LA hotspots and because of that they catered to the every whim of celebrities. The slight snub by the hostess was yet another small reminder of where she fell in the social order of LA.

Lola remembered when she had still been in private school and had learned about the feudal system. With the few kings and royal court members being at the top and moving down to the serfs and slaves, which were the majority of the population. It was one of the first situations of a structured class system. More than likely it had set the stage and allowed the class structure that she was currently living in to mutate and take control of the lives of those that lived in it. But in the feudal system you were stuck in the social class you were born in. Lola only hoped that the difference between now and then would be that she could move up in the chain. Lola frequently thought about her time in regular school and the small lessons she had learned that showed up in her everyday life. At the time the lessons in the classrooms and the lessons in the halls differed greatly but they both affected her way of thinking.

But when she got the job as Jordan Burke she got an on set tutor along with the other teens on the set. The playground lessons were over and the Hollywood lessons began. And the Hollywood lessons affected her more than any girl in the hallways ever could have. The backstabbing was obvious and opposed to hidden, calculated as opposed to juvenile and everywhere as opposed to scattered.

Taking another deep breath Lola knocked and turned the knob to enter the private room. Ari was talking forcefully into his cell phone, every now and then letting the F-bomb fly out of his mouth. He didn’t look up when Lola entered the room so she sat down across from him. At her place was a plate of Sesame Encrusted Lobster Tail and a glass of sake. She wrinkled her nose at the dish.

“You were late and I am on a tight schedule. The lobster here is good.” Ari had hung up the phone without saying goodbye to the person on the other line. Ari stuffed a large piece of his own Kobe Filet Minon Toban Yaki into his mouth and stared intently at Lola as he chewed. Lola in turn quietly cut into the lobster and chewed with her eyes looking right back at him. She wanted desperately to look away but she felt like she was being tested and she intended to pass. She wished he would alleviate her discomfort by telling her if he was going to manage her or not but only after both Lola and Ari had finished their dinner did Ari decide to speak up.

“If I take you on as a client, and that is a big if, you will not be doing any movies or television as a surfer. You will not go near the water, your characters will not live in a beach house, they will not be lifeguards, they will not go sailing, they will not know how to swim, shit they will not even be shown taking a bath.”

“That’s exactly what I was thinking. I want-”

“This is not about what you want or your artistic aspirations. This is about blockbusters and studio films, money and numbers.”

“Okay” Lola nodded. “Really I’m willing to do whatever to get my career going again.”

“That’s what I like to hear. Now I assume because you have been out the business so long you don’t have any people,“ Lola shook her head ”Well we will have to set that up. I don’t care what you have been up to since ‘Making Waves’ went off the air. You could have joined a cult, killed chickens in a field, danced around them and let people tape it Elliot Mintz can spin it into a positive.”

“Elliot Mintz. Isn’t he Paris Hilton’s publicist? Doesn’t she keep him busy enough?” Lola smiled.

“I wouldn’t recommend him if I thought she would be in the way. He is feed up with her crazy shit. Here is his card, call him tomorrow and set up an appointment. Tell them I sent you.” Ari finished off the drink that was in front of him, “Now will I have to deal with anyone else’s managers, publicists, agents, whatever.”

“Sorry… I- I don’t understand.”

“Are you dating anyone? Anyone in the business who has people I will have to deal with?”

“Ooh… well sort of… I guess I am.” Lola picked at the fingers nervously under Ari intense stare, “Umm Justin Timberlake. But its new so I don’t know.”

“Johnny Wright, Ken Sunshine… okay I can deal with them.”

Ari reached into his briefcase, which was by his feet and handed Lola a stack of papers. “CAA contracts,” he simply said, “have these looked at by a lawyer, but you won’t find a better deal out there, stop by my office and drop it off with my assistant.” Taking out his BlackBerry he looked up his schedule, “This Wednesday at 3 is good for me. We’ll talk about some upcoming projects that you can get your feet wet with.”

“Oh that’s sounds great but Wednesday is not so good for-” Lola went to interject and tell Ari that she had plans but he simply waved her off.

“My schedule is busier than yours, you can cancel.” Ari snapped and stood up from the table. Lola followed suit and stood up, they shook hands and Ari’s cell phone rang so she let herself out.

Waiting for the valet to bring her car she thought over the night and the dinner. And she smiled.

This time she was back in the game.

:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:

Justin had called twice that morning but she couldn’t bring herself to call him back. Not yet. She had told him all about the meeting with Ari that she had three nights ago and he had been almost as excited as her. He insisted on taking her out dancing to celebrate and celebrate they did! But she couldn’t call him yet because he would inevitably ask her when her appointment with Elliot Mintz was. And since she had yet to call Elliot Mintz’s office she didn’t want to talk to Justin and have absolutely nothing to tell him.

Her cell phone sat in her lap and Elliot’s business card sat next to it. She simply had to pick up the phone, dial the number and make an appointment. But she couldn’t seem to bring herself to do it.

Picking up the business card she read it for what was probably the thousandth time since she had gotten it. Really she wasn’t exactly sure what was holding her back this much. She figured that part of her was scared because if Elliot said no he couldn’t help her then the high she had been on the past few days would be gone and she really didn’t want to lose it. But if that happened Lola was fairly certain that Justin would be able to lift her back up. She was beginning to depend on him more than she wanted to but she like she did with a lot of things she simply rolled with it.

She had had the initiative to fax the contract over to her uncle who was the partner in a law firm in New York City. He had told her that it was a pretty standard contract and she should sign it with confidence. But the next step was to call Elliot Mintz and set up an appointment and that she was having trouble with.

Getting a wave of confidence Lola picked up the cell phone, quickly dialed the number before she lost her nerve and waited for someone to pick up.

“Elliot Mintz’s Office” A cheerful gay man answered the phone. Lola was lucky enough to get an appointment that afternoon because according to Patrick, the receptionist, Paris had cancelled yet another appointment. Lola didn’t especially care how the opening had come about just that she had filled it. Now she just had to be sure that she didn’t blow it off due to nerves, which she sometimes had a tendency to do.

Her little Maltese poodle, Holly hopped up on the couch and settled her head in her master’s lap. Smiling Lola couldn’t resist scratching behind Holly’s ears and rubbing her belly a little. “Hey baby” Lola cooed and Holly looked up at her with adoration, “want your friend Justin to come over, huh baby.” Holly wagged her tail and started panting heavier than she had been before. “Would you like that baby” Lola grabbed a tennis ball from off the floor and threw it into the kitchen. While Holly ran after the ball Lola grabbed her phone and called Justin.

“Hey baby” Justin smiled into the phone. He had been recording and was on a lunch break. He would have called Lola but earlier he had called twice before and got nothing but her answering machine. He wanted to ask her about what was going on with her meeting with Elliot Mintz. The night she got the contract from Ari they had gone out to Hyde to celebrate. The two of them danced, drank, smoked a little in the VIP lounge and Lola had let him feel her up in the corner. All in all he counted the night as a success.

“Hey I just wanted to tell you I got a meeting with Elliot Mintz at 2:30 this afternoon.”

“So soon? That’s great!” Justin smiled.

“Yea apparently Paris Hilton cancelled her meeting with him so he was free” Lola admitted. “What are you doing?”

“Recording” Justin said simply. He was in the studio with Timberland playing around trying to get new ideas for an album. So far no inspiration was coming. His last album he had had inspiration coming out his ass due. Which at the time had been a good thing but looking back it let too many people into his life and allowed them to analyze his music and his private life.

“Oh I’m sorry I didn’t mean to call and interrupt. Call me when your done.”

“Nah girl I’m on a lunch break. You’re good.” Justin smiled. His past girlfriends had called whenever they wanted without apology. As bad as it sounded and as much as he really did want to he couldn’t always drop everything to bullshit on the phone with his girl, he was busy and other people depended on him focusing on the task at hand. Not only did Lola understand but she wasn’t even slightly bothered by it. “What are you doing till your meeting?” He asked, taking a large bit out of the sandwich Rachel had ordered for him form a deli down the street.

“I’m not sure, I might just hang around my house.”

“Why don’t you come down to the studio.”

“Oh aren’t you working with Timberland today. I don’t want to be in the way.”

“You wouldn’t be in the way. Come spend time with your man!”

Lola giggled into the phone, “Okay, okay” she said, smiling. “I’ll be there soon. Do you guys want anything, food, coffee or whatever.”

“Nah Rachel got us some lunch. Bye babe, see you soon” Justin hung up the phone, smiling to himself.

Timberland looked over at him, “You look like a goofy motherfucker man. Smiling like that.”

“Fuck you man. Do your damn job.” Justin laughed and gestured to the sound board that Timb sat in front of. Justin watched as Timb slid the headphones on his head and listened to the playback of the song just had just laid down.

Just then his cell phone rang, “Hello” he answered without looking at the screen to see who it was. He usually didn’t need to because he customized peoples ringtones, if ‘Everytime We Touch’ (her pick) played he knew it was Lola calling him, “Hey I’m in the lot. What studio are you in?” Lola asked.

“Hey we’re in studio 3”

“Okay see you in a few.” Justin hung up.

“Is Lola coming?” Rachel looked up from her book and asked. Rachel and Lola had only met a few times but both girls seemed to like one another, even if they were a little reserved.

“Yea she is in the lot, she should be here any minute.”

“Good I need some estrogen in here,” she said looking from Justin to Timb to a sleeping Trace, Mike and Eric, Justin’s two bodyguards.

They sat in silence for a moment before Lola came in arms laden down with a tray of coffees, her clutch purse, and her cell phone in between her ear and shoulder. Setting the coffee tray on the end table next to the couch she threw herself down next to Justin, pecking him on the lips.

“Hi. I have to cancel my appointment with Dr. Lupinacci. Lola Dean. L-O-L-A D-E-A-N. It is Wednesday at 2:30. Yes, I realize that the wait will be very long wait for a new appointment. Okay yes that sounds good. Thank you.” Lola hung up the phone and sighed, resting her head on Justin’s shoulder. “Hi baby” she sighed before gesturing to the coffees. “I brought coffee for everyone, I didn’t know your guards would be here though. Rachel you like the Italian blend right?” Lola raised her eyebrows questioningly at Rachel.

“Yea I do.”

Getting up and grabbing one of the coffees she handed it to Rachel “Then this one is for you.” Lola went to go sit back next to Justin

“I don’t think so” Justin said and pulled her into his lap. Lola giggled and planted a kiss on his cheek.

“Oh shit. I was so into the beat I didn’t notice the presence of such a beautiful lady.” Timb put the headphones down and stood to greet Lola. “That’s how you know it’s a good beat,” he said to Justin.

“Hi I’m Lola Dean” Lola put her hand out to shake Timbs hand, but he surprised her by bending down and kissing her hand.

“I know who you are beautiful. Look at you… you’re bringing sexy back. Good for you.” Lola laughed and smiled goofily at Justin.

“Why aren’t you this charming J?” she laughed, sticking out her tongue at him.

“Please this man is a player. You do not want me to be that charming.” Justin laughed,

“Are we getting back to work?” He asked Timb.

“Yea man, we’ll get you outta here early so you can spend the night with your girl.” Timb smiled at Lola and took his seat back at the soundboard.

Justin headed into the booth and put the headphones over his ears. For the next few hours Justin went through some of the songs that may be featured on the new album. He had a lot of songs left over from recording Justified that hadn’t made it onto the album for one reason or another. Being in the early stages of recording a new album he wasn’t sure if he wanted to make a repeat album though.

While he sang he watched Lola through the mirror as she talked to Rachel and, when he woke up, Trace. Watching her interact with his friends and family made Justin involuntarily smile and he knew he was ready for the next step in their relationship.

CHAPTER 8

Lola tapped her high-heeled foot nervously on the carpeted floor that was in the reception area of Elliot Mintz’s office. The architecture and decoration in his office showcased the clout that he had in the entertainment industry. Unfortunately for her most of the time she judged things by their appearance. It was something that many in the industry had grown accustomed to doing, whether it was PC or not. When you lived in the Hollywood bubble where everyone strives for perfection in everything they do it is hard to not judge everyone and everything by what you see on the outside. In LA in particular people were judged by what designer they were wearing, what kind of car they drove, and what part of town they lived in. Life was all about the latest ‘it’ item or person and Lola simply wanted a chance to be added to that list.

Her appointment was at 2:30 and it was now about 2:45. As she had already learned from talking to Elliot’s assistant on the phone that he loved to gossip about the clients that walked through the office on a daily basis. A small part of her couldn’t wait until she was important enough to have people talking about her. Today he had told her about Mr. Mintz being on a conference call with Paris Hilton. Something about her having one martini and blowing a DUI field test. Apparently there were pictures and videos and a pending court date.

The large oak office door opened breaking the silence in the room and Lola’s head snapped up at the interruption. Elliot Mintz stood in the doorway looking directly at her, “Lola Dean?” he questioned. He looked tired and worn out, his tie had been loosened a little and his hair was slightly messy, as if he had been running his hands through it.

“Yes” Lola rose and grabbed her belongings. Elliot stepped to the side and ushered her into his office, shutting the door behind them.

When they were both seated Elliot started speaking right away, “Personally I am a man who likes to get straight to the point and not beat around the bush. Your previous track record for success, minus the last few years, and the fact that you now have Ari Emmanuel in your corner have helped me come to the decision to take you on as a client-”

“Oh thank you Mr. Mintz” Lola rushed to say. “You-”

Ignoring the fact that she was speaking Elliot went on, “Unfortunately unforeseeable circumstances have come up that I have to deal with right away. I will call you later in the week to go over some history with you. I like to get all past indiscretions by my clients out in the open so we will know how to handle them before they come up in the press. And Miss Dean I advice you to think about what you have been doing in the past few years because anything that is potentially damaging will eventually be found out. We want to nip anything in the bud before it turns into a scandal.”

“Okay” Lola stood and shook Elliot’s outstretched hand. “Thank you again. I will talk to you soon.”

Leaving the office feeling the sense of accomplishment that can only come with conquering a fear Lola smiled to herself. Her new life was falling into place and she thought that she could actually feel her old life drifting away, nothing but a memory to look back and learn from. Hopefully nothing that happened during her years off would cause her comeback to stall or worse.

:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:

Lindsay burst through Lola’s bedroom door, in complete party mode. She skipped into the bathroom to wave a small baggie in Lola’s face. “You’re in bitch, let’s party!” She flopped down on Lola’s bed and pulled a small black bag out of her purse. Unzipping it and pulling a small mirror out of the bag, along with a small glass straw and a razor she cut two large even lines of cocaine and expertly snorted them without coming up to wipe her nose. She sniffled and shook her head in an attempt to alleviate the burning sensation.

Like a good friend, Lindsay cut two more lines for Lola and got up to check out Lola’s closet to see if there was anything she wanted to borrow for tonight. She called out to Lola from inside the closet, “You look beautiful. Get out here and celebrate bitch. I cut the lines for you.”

Lola finally came out of the bathroom; she was wearing a green Tracy Reese studded tunic dress and brown suede Marc Jacobs boots. She went straight to the bed, mimicking the expert way Lindsa y had just snorted the cocaine. She wiped the small amount of excess cocaine from the mirror and rubbed it on her teeth and gums, immediately alleviating any burn that she felt. She got up and checked to make sure no excess was easily spotted in her nostrils.

Not seeing any visible cocaine she skipped into her own closet and playfully pushed Lindsay out, “Come on Linds we said we would be there 15 minutes ago.” She grabbed her L.A.M.B. clutch and they drove to Hyde laughing and joking with each other as best friends do.

Lindsay handed the keys and a large tip to the valet and the two of them slowly made their way through the crowd of photographers that were always outside of Hyde. They yelled questions at Lindsay but for the most part ignored Lola’s presence. A few times Lindsay was asked whom she was with but they both plowed through the throng without answering any of the questions.

Inside the club the two girls met up with friends and acquaintances. Many of the people they hung out with in the VIP sections of various clubs they didn’t actually know personally but they all associated together because they were in the same industry and were somehow linked together one way or another. Lola quickly surveyed the room and the people in it. She saw Kimberly Stewart and Paris Hilton dancing on a couch, Ashlee Simpson desperately flirting with Wentworth Miller and Jessica Simpson sulking in the corner watching Nick Lachey and Vanessa Minnello flirt in a private booth.

Lindsay grabbed Lola’s hand and the two girls made their way to the table with the Reserved sign in the center. Within the next half and hour they were greeted by friends Mischa Barton, Tara Reid and Andy Roddick. As the night went on Joe Francis of Girls Gone Wild fame, Hilary and Haylie Duff and Fergie all stopped by to say hi and were all unceremoniously asked to leave in the rude way you only feel strong enough to be when you’re with your closest friends.

After several hours of drinking, dancing, talking and several “trips to the bathroom”
Lola, Lindsay, Mischa Barton and Adrian Grenier, who Lindsay knew from her friendship with Jeremy Piven, all left Hyde around 4 in the morning. Not surprisingly they weren’t the last people to leave the club, many people and celebrities were still in full party mode.

Getting through the crowd of paparazzi was more difficult than when they had entered the club. Not only because the number of cameras had doubled because of how many celebrities were currently in the club and also because the three of the four friends were not walking very steadily in their Manolo’s. Lola limped along being supported by Adrian while Mischa and Lindsay stumbled through the crowd, arms out to keep photographers at bay and giggling at the not funny situation. Looking back to check on Mischa and Lindsay the two girls locked eyes and Lola watched in vain as Lindsay tripped on the curb and fell onto the ground. Mischa simply giggled in a way that showed she was not only drunk but high as well as Adrian untangled himself from Lola to help Lindsay up. The flashes went wild and several cameramen stooped down to get a closer shoot of Lindsay. Adrian lifted her up while simultaneously pushing the photographers that were close to her back. Then he took on the not so easy task of rounding up all three girls and walking them to the car. Situating Mischa and Lindsay in the back and Lola into the front seat he got in the driver’s seat he quickly drove away from the club and from the unavoidable story that they had all just caused.

:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:

Justin didn’t quite understand why he always waited for Lola to call him. His past girlfriends had called several times a day, sometimes with nothing to say at all. He always felt like they we calling because they felt that was what people in relationships did. In the past he had usually been curt and short during these times but in this moment he completely understood what they were feeling. He liked talking to her and hearing her voice throughout the day, especially if her could not be with her. Not hearing from a girl was slightly foreign to him and while he was going about his day he often found himself looking at his phone and wondering why he hadn’t heard from her yet.

Turning on the television in an attempt to stop his train of thought and to distract himself he flipped through the channels, looking for something interesting to watch. Seeing a photo of Lindsay with Lola and Adrian Grenier behind her he paused, curiosity getting the best of him. Lindsay was sprawled on the ground and her eyes were half shut, while Lola looked on, eyes wide and mouth slightly open.

“Lindsay Lohan was seen last night partying at Hyde Nightclub with Adrian Grenier, Mischa Barton and an unknown blonde. At around 4 am the four left Hyde Nightclub and that is when Lindsay allegedly tripped on the curb and fell. A source has told Access Hollywood that Lindsay and the unidentified blonde were photographed here entering the club at around midnight. No word yet on whether or not Lindsay was hurt in the fall. Reports also say that Adrian and the beautiful blonde on his arm were seen talking and flirting inside the club. There is also no response from Adrian Grenier’s people on who the woman he is pictured with is.”

Justin watched the report with a mixture of anger and confusion. Last night he had told Lola to go out and have a good time with her friends to celebrate her successful meeting. He was recording in the studio and he finally found himself in a good place creatively, he didn’t want to lose the momentum. From the images that he saw in front of him she had taken his advice and then some. He didn’t exactly know where the anger about the situation was coming from but one could safely assume that having so many girlfriends cheat on him had made him irrationally suspicious.

Grabbing his keys he decided to head over to Lola’s house, wishing to hear the whole story about what happened last night. The short drive gave him very little time to cool down and as he walked up the walkway he noticed that the door was slightly open, cautiously he stepped through the doorway and into the foyer. Surveying the living room he was shocked at the mess that lay in front of him. A ceramic vase was smashed into tiny pieces on the floor, the water and flowers that should have been inside were now all over the floor. Picture frames were smashed, magazines and books from on the coffee table were now scattered on the floor, knickknacks from various places in the room were scattered around as well and a small side table was turned over. The television was on the same Access Hollywood that he had just been watching and Nancy O’Dell’s voice was the only thing that he heard.

Walking through the living room he saw something out of the corner of his eye. Squinting, he walked closer to the coffee table in an attempt to confirm his suspicions. Picking up the bent spoon he looked at the bottom and saw that it was burnt. Looking around he saw a Zippo lighter sitting on the couch cushions. “Shit” he cursed under his breath.

The anger that he had felt at his house and on the drive over was gone and was now replaced by worry over the dangerous situation he had walked in on. The whole situation worried him- her door being left open, her house being trashed and now it appeared that she was high on heroin.

“Lola?” he called out. Listening for a response but not getting one Justin called out to her again this time louder, “Lola?” listening closely he thought her heard a soft whimper and he made his way into the kitchen. For a second he was relieved that he saw Lola but the relief was again replaced by worry when he took in her appearance. She was slumped in the corner of the kitchen, her dress bunched up around her hips and a vacant look on her face. Her hair was tangled and wild, as if she had been raking her hands through it and it seemed as if she was staring at the tiles on the floor but it was almost as if she was looking right past them. She didn’t even bother to look up at the noise that he made coming into the kitchen. When he got closer he could see that her face was tear stained and flushed, it seemed as if she had been crying, although he didn’t quite know why she would have been crying.

Making his way through the kitchen he sat down next to her on the tiled floor and awkwardly put his arms around her limp body, pulling her into his lap. Thinking back to the last time he had been on the floor of her kitchen Justin wondered what had caused this particular breakdown. Surely it couldn’t be the same reason as last time. He career seemed to be moving in the right direction very quickly for the first time in years.

“Justin” Lola whispered and his eyes looked down questioningly on her face. Slowly her eyes turned up to his face.

After sitting in the same spot for what felt like hours but in reality was probably only a few minutes and not moving or talking Justin felt his body begin to hurt from sitting on the tiled floor. Picking up her tiny body he moved her into the living room, again this situation seemed a little too familiar for his comfort.

Several minutes went by as Justin watched Lola’s eyes drift close and then open again. Breaking the silence in a quiet whispered voice that seemed void and dead Lola said, “They didn’t even bother to find out who I was.” A few large tears escaped and ran down her cheeks.

Confused as to what that meant he softly asked, “What?”

Lola just slowly shook her head and mumbled, “Unidentified blonde” She said in a saddened voice, it was the most emotion he had heard in her voice since he found her. Coming from experience he knew that he wouldn’t get very much of the story of what had happened before he got there until she came down from the high she was on. Staring up at the ceiling it seemed as if she had forgotten about Justin entirely.

Watching her for a few minutes his attention was taken away from her when he heard the familiar jingle that told the viewer that Extra was starting. He looked up from Lola’s face to the television, but now Extra was on instead of Access Hollywood.

“Many celebrities have been seen recently at the Hyde Club, Hollywood’s latest hot spot. Paris Hilton, Tara Reid, and members of the cast of Laguna Beach have recently been seen at Hyde. Last night Lindsay Lohan, who was taking a break from shooting her new movie, was seen leaving the club around 4 am with Mischa Barton, Adrian Grenier and an unidentified blonde. That is when Lindsay allegedly tripped on the curb outside the club and fell. We tried to contact Lindsay’s publicist for a statement but she was unavailable for comment. And while it didn’t seem as if Lindsay was having a good night Adrian Grenier seemed to be enjoying himself with the unidentified blonde who entered the club around 12 with Lindsay. Sources inside the club say that the two were seen flirting and dancing most of the night.”

As Justin sat and watched the report the pieces of what he had walked in on were beginning to come together. He assumed that she had seen the Access Hollywood that had run a similar report- the one that he had seen. In the short time that he had known her he knew that when people referred to her struggle against Hollywood typecasting that she got very upset. He had seen times when someone would inadvertently bring up her lack of work and it would cause her to shut down. She would hardly talk, sometimes for a day or two. Although he had seen her drown that depression in alcohol and weed he had never seen her on such hardcore drugs as heroin. He wouldn’t get on some high horse and deny that when he used to party more often he would partake in whatever happened to be around that night. But after spending a few nights out at various clubs with Lola he saw that she took it to a whole new level. And the level that she voluntarily went to worried him.

CHAPTER 9

“I just don’t know what to do about it.” Justin sat in his home studio with a notebook in his lap talking to Rachel. He was trying to write and get himself back into a creative space but he felt that the situation with Lola really needed to be resolved in his head. He had told Trace all about what had happened last night and what had been going on with Lola- her excessive drinking, her all night partying, her drug use and her extreme mood swings. With some prodding on his part Trace had given him an earful about what he thought of Lola and her hard partying ways. And while he didn’t like hearing negative things about his girl coming out of his best friends mouth he understood it was coming from a place of love. But when Rachel came into the main house this morning he figured some female insight into his relationship might help him to understand what was going on inside Lola’s pretty little self-destructive head. Another good thing about having his cousin around was that before becoming his personal assistant she was a psychology major. So not only did she have insight into the irrational female mind but she could also dissect what was going on behind all that crazy.

“I know you want to help Jay,” Rachel sympathetically put her hand on her cousins knee, “but I think this might be something Lola has to try to get through on her own. She lives in this fucked up Hollywood world where she is friends with all these people who are super famous and have tons of jobs and opportunities coming their way and everyone is always talking about them but she hasn’t had any offers in years and even when she is out with her friends no one bothers with her- no one cares. All of this has been building up and building up inside of her for years but she has too much pride to let any of her friends help her. So she helps herself deal in the only way she knows how, as destructive as that way may be. Everything that she has pushed down for years is having an affect on her self-image and in addition to that it is probably not too easy on her self-esteem dating someone as successful as you are.” She said the last thing as caring and compassionate as possible.

“So dating me makes her snort drugs up her nose.” Justin said defensively, pulling away from Rachel. Rachel rarely sugarcoated anything that she said and she always expressed her true feelings. It was a pro and a con of her personality but he had to admit she was usually right in the long run.

“No… no” Rachel backed up, “Shit. That came out the wrong way. What I mean is that you are really successful in all aspects of your career, which is not something you should ever feel bad about but you have to look at this from her point of view. She is probably a little intimidated by that. And it might be affecting her self-esteem. That is all I meant.”

“Yeah” Justin said slowly, he was at a bit of a loss for words. He had a lot of thinking to do about his relationship with Lola and the impact he was willing to have in her life. He didn’t want to have such a negative impact on her life and on her self-image.

:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:

Lying in bed staring at the ceiling Lola was deep in thought about everything that had happened yesterday. Her day had started out really good. She was able to sleep in later than she usually did and then she went out for brunch with Nicole and Adam. Then when she got home she was able to get some light reading in and do a little surfing on the beach. All in all it had been a relaxing day. But as usual in her life something small- something that she was not going to think about at the moment- fucked with her head and she lost hold on the good place that she had been in for a few days.

One of the very very few good things about doing drugs to escape your problems as opposed to drinking them away was that you didn’t have to deal with a hangover the next morning.

She was able to see that the rationalization of her drug use was not a healthy thing to do but it was the reality that most drug users did do it in order to validate the reason that they continued to use.

Another good thing, much better and healthier than the rationalization of drug use, was that Lola recovered quickly from illness and injury. Recovery was one of the things that she was good at. Broken hearts and crushing blows to her ego were always mended quickly and with only the necessary amount of crying and overindulgent eating. While some would blame it on her severe mood swings Lola just considered herself lucky. Yesterday’s episode was simply added to the list of small slights and large grievances that she had to deal with on a daily basis. After these seemingly trivial incidents good news was the thing that brought her back to some semblance of normal. Luck for her she usually ended up getting some good news after something personally devastating happen to her, it just happened that way.

Today she was woken up by her good news. Ari’s assistant had called and asked her to come into the office to pick up some scripts to read. She was glad that Ari was true to his word he didn’t waste anytime finding her work. She had known that there were scripts out there for her and this reinforced the idea that firing Ruby had been a good move.

Today was her day she could feel it.

Checking her Cartier tank watch she saw that she had about an hour to get ready and make her way over to Ari’s office. Walking into her closest she chose a white Karen Zambos dress . Another thing she always had going for her was he ability to put together a great outfit.

Smiling at Ari’s assistant she was quickly ushered into Ari’s office, which made her feel very important. Most people had to wait at least a few minutes in the waiting room. As usual Ari was on the phone, barking orders to whoever was on the other end. She took a seat on the couch parallel to his desk and waited patiently for him to get off the phone. Looking around she saw a large stack of papers on Ari’s desk and hoped that it was a stack of scripts because there were probably three or four scripts in that pile.

“Hello Lola” Ari greeted her. She wasn’t used to him using a nice tone of voice with her or with anyone for that matter. He was usually curt, gruff and to the point. That is what made him such a great agent. Grabbing each one of the scripts he explained the premise of each one and what character she would be auditioning for. The great thing about getting scripts through an agent was that it was because whoever wrote the script or purchased the rights to it had requested that she read it and recommended her for that particular part. “Okay go home and read these over and have an answer tomorrow about which one you are most interested in doing. Then we will talk about which one would benefit your career the most. I don’t want to talk about this without you having read the scripts.”

Lola left the office with her large stack of scripts and a big smile on her face. A smile that got even bigger when Ari’s assistant smiled and winked at her.

Yes today was her day!

She made her way back to her house and the rest of the day was spent reading the four scripts Ari had given her.

While Lola loved reading and tried to read as much as possible she didn’t realize that she would enjoy reading scripts as much as she did. But she found herself devouring page after page without stopping. It was most likely the knowledge that this would turn into something productive for her that kept her going. She had finished one of the four scripts but had decided to reserve judgment of which one she wanted until the other three where finished.

She had to say though, whoever sent these scripts over to Ari’s office thinking that she should be included in the pool of actresses interested in the part was a nice feeling. While she assumed that it might have taken some cajoling from Ari she was still honored that they had said agreed to at least let her read the scripts because it really was up to them whether or not she got one of these parts.

:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:

With all the confusion of last night Justin nearly forgot that his mother was coming into town for a few days. It was a last minute trip that his mother decided she just needed to take. What he assumed was that Trace had told his own mother about Justin seeing Lola and Trace’s mom had told Lynn. And he could only imagine what Trace had said to his own mother. If Trace had said even half the stuff that Justin knew he felt about Lola he was in for one intense weekend. Even if this was true Justin was actually a little thankful that his mother was coming. Talking to her might put things into perspective for him.

He didn’t have to wait long for her to come out of the airport and when he spotted her he jumped out of the car. “Hi Momma” he hugged his mom and grabbed her luggage out of her hands and put them in the back of his truck. The ride back to his house was filled with small talk and gossip about friends and family members back in Tennessee.

Finally they got back to his house and got Lynn situated into the room in his house that he had especially for when she visited. He was unsure about how to bring up the topic of Lola with his mom, seeing as he hadn’t told her he was dating anyone. They were sitting in the kitchen and Justin figured that this was as good a time as any to get it over with.

“So Momma I wanted to talk to you about something and get your opinion.”

Lynn looked at her son closely; “Of course baby” Lynn was bustling around the kitchen making dinner. Another reason he liked that his mom was here- he would actually get to eat some real food.

“Do you remember that show I used to watch when I was little ‘Making Waves’?” without waiting for an answer he went on, “Well I have been talking to the actress who used to be on the show- Lola Dean. Do you remember her at all?”

“Yes I do. She was a cute little thing.” Lynn said slowly, she already knew this was coming and was semi surprised that they were talking about this so early in her visit.

“Well we met through some mutual friends and have been talking but the thing is she has been having a lot of problems lately. She goes out to clubs a lot and she has really bad mood swings. She hasn’t had any work in awhile and it has made her kind of depressed. I talked to Rach about it and she said it was a self-esteem issue. Rach also thinks that it might be bad for her self-esteem to be dating me. What do you think?”

“Well baby I’m glad you finally took the initiative to tell me about Lola. I just wish you would tell me as much as Trace tells his mother.” Obviously Justin needed to have a talk with Trace about privacy, “Now if I knew this girl better I could give you my opinion on the situation but I simply cannot make a judgment based on the edited version of events you just told me.”

As much as he loved his mother she knew exactly what to say to make him feel guilty and he didn’t miss the passive aggressive tone of her voice or her thinly veiled attempt to request a meeting with Lola. He was also well aware of the fact that his mother was a real Southern women and could make a judgment about anyone at anytime, whether she knew them or not.

“Well then why don’t I invite her over for dinner tonight.” Even as he said it he knew it was not a good idea but ever the momma’s boy he offered it because he knew it is what his mother wanted. He actually preferred that the two didn’t meet. In the past his mother had been very judgmental when she first met his girlfriends and he wanted to protect Lola from that, for many reasons, the main one being what a run in with his mother could do to her.

His mother turned and smiled at him, “Wonderful idea, I’m so glad you suggested it,” she looked at her watch and said, “you should call her now. I’ll start getting dinner ready.”

Cursing himself and his inability to say no to his mother he went upstairs to grab his phone and call Lola.

“Hey Jay” Lola’s voice was one that was instantly recognizable. It had that sexy raspy sound like when you got a sore throat.

“Hey Lo, what are you doing?” He was stalling the inevitable.

“Reading some scripts. I went to Ari’s office this morning to pick up four scripts to read,” he could hear the smile in her voice, which was promising. “I got through one but I’m not gonna decide until I’ve read them all.”

“That’s great. So you’re okay today?” Justin asked slowly.

Lola was quiet for a moment and her voice came over the phone quiet, “Yes I’m fine today. Last night was a mistake and I had a good day today. Thank you though.” He could here her silent plea through the phone to drop the subject and for now he would.

“Great. So are you doing anything tonight because I wanted to invite you over tonight for dinner.” Justin eased in before revealing the big clincher, “But before you say anything I think it is only fair that I tell you my mother is in town,” he chuckled awkwardly “so I understand if you suddenly have plans.”

“Nope totally free” Lola laughed into the phone. He was asking her to meet his mother!

Today was definitively her day!

As much as he didn’t want tonight to happen he was strangely glad that she would be coming over. He liked having her in his house and he really like spending time with her but what he liked the most was that for one night he would know that she was safe. “Okay just come over whenever you’re ready. Dinner should be in like and hour and a half maybe two hours.”

“Okay see you soon Jay”

:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:

Regret was a difficult thing. It was one of those human emotions that could be felt in small insignificant amounts or in large all consuming amounts.

Justin felt regret in different stages. At the moment he was regretting not tell his big girlie best friend not to gossip about his life, which was a relatively small regret. He also was regretting inviting his emotionally fragile… whatever… over to meet his intensely protective stage mother, which was a relatively big regret.

They were all sitting at his dining room table, which he rarely used and his mother was talking about Veronica- his ex who lived in Tennessee. Apparently she had just got her realtor’s license and “she just looks so pretty”. While Justin didn’t like where this conversation was going he dreaded the point when his mother would run out of ex-girlfriends to talk about and would move on to talking about Lola.

Lola’s face had no discernable expression; she was simply nodding occasionally and slowly eating her dinner. The only noise from her side of the table was the light scrapping of her silverware against the plate.

Lynn smiled and looked directly at Lola. “So Lola dear, how rude of me, going on and on about people you don’t know. Where are you from dear?”

“Oh well I’m from Boston originally but I’ve lived in Los Angeles most of my life.”

“Oh that’s right. You were on that show. Justin what was the name of that show you used to watch?”

“She played Jordan on ’Making Waves’ Mama”

“That’s right. I remember now how you and Britney would never miss and episode.” He had been waiting until that name would come up. “So Lola Justin tells me you haven’t had any work in a while. Did you decide to stop working after ‘Making Waves’ got cancelled?”

Wow… telling his mother anything about Lola- big regret.

He had to give credit where credit was due though, Lola put her fork down and looked his mother directly in the eyes, something that stronger men had not been able to do in the past, “Well no, I haven’t had any work lately but I just recently signed with CAA and I am being represented by Ari Emmanuel and Elliot Mintz. Today I started reading some scripts and I am considering what role I should take on.”

He had to say he was impressed that she was able to hold her own but he was not about to under estimate his mother’s ability to come out on top.

Lynn calmly took a bite of her dinner, “And your parents dear, are they well?”

“Oh yes ma’am they are. They live here in LA.”

“And what do they do?”

“They are both lawyers, they work together at a firm in Beverly Hills.”

“O how nice. So you grew up wealthy, did you?” Lynn pried. Like many people Lynn had instilled in him that it was rude not only to ask about money but also to talk about it at the dinner table. He was surprised at how his mother was acting but he was even more surprised at the fact that Lola was not visibly cowering, quite the opposite she was appearing to be a worthy opponent to his mother. But again Lynn came out on top with everything she did, he didn’t doubt that it would be the same tonight.

“Well I guess you could say that but I consider us to be more upper middle class.”

“And the depression, how are you dealing with that? Justin tells me you are battling with depression.”

There we go…

He was mildly shocked that his mother was using his own flippant words against him. He didn’t say she was sick with depression he simply told his mother that she was sad, when really discouraged would have been a better word to use.

Not being more conscientious about the words he used when talking to his mother- Big regret.

Lola smiled calmly, “Oh yes ma’am. It is under control. Thank you for asking.” As if she had just won some silent battle Lynn went back to eating her dinner.

Before she could think of any other prying questions to ask Lola he decided to be more proactive in keeping the conversation going in a direction that was conducive to what he wanted. He steered the conversation towards some of his upcoming projects, a topic that was bound to distract his mother.

Once dinner was finished Lynn went to work with doing the dishes, insisting that she didn’t need help. Lola made her way from the dining room into the living room. Looking at Lynn and then back in the direction Lola had gone he decided to follow after Lola.

Walking in the living room he noticed Lola rooting around in her purse. He grabbed her hand and forced her to look up at him and the anger he saw made him drop his hand like he had burnt it. “Hey what’s going on?” He asked stupidly.

“I’m leaving” Finding he keys in triumph she went to brush past him but Justin grabbed her.

“No, don’t leave. I’m sorry for her,” Justin said softly, touching his forehead with hers. “Please don’t let her run you off, that’s just how she is. It’s her way of protecting me.”

“From what? From the depressed, drug addict, former actress” She whispered, venomously and tried in vain to wiggle from his grasp.

He pulled her down onto the couch but refused to go of her, in fear that she would leave faster than he was able to stop her, “I talk to my mom about everything, for a long time she was the only one I talked to about anything and because of that she feels the need to protect me. Especially when it comes to relationships. It isn’t always right the way she does it but that is how she is. This is not about you, it’s about me. She’s angry that I didn’t talk to her about you and that she had to hear it from Trace’s mom.”

“I don’t care Justin. I don’t care that she feels the need to protect you from me or that she is mad at you. That is not the way to treat someone you just met. For the nice Southern woman you told me she was this is not the southern hospitality I was expecting. I may not be from the South but I know that my parents would never have treated you that way and they never ever would throw anything that you do back in your face. They would never demean or blatantly try to humiliate you like that.” She pecked him on the lips before getting up, “This obviously was not something that she was ready for so I am going to go.”

“Hey don’t go,” Justin was worried about what she may do to relieve the stress of tonight, she had freaked out over much less.

“I really can’t handle anymore bonding. I will call you tomorrow.” With a short kiss she got up and gathered her things back up and left, shooting him a small smile before leaving.

He watched her out the window as she made her way to the car. Halfway there she got a call on her cell and he hoped beyond anything that it wasn’t someone that would get her into trouble.