Author's Chapter Notes:

JC talks things over with Roy, anniversary date, blah.

Nice little fact: JC Chasez Has A Successful Solo Career: A Romance is just about to have it's 1st birthday. It feels like only yesterday sincethis story was still rated PG & I was only making my first reference to erections. ;) I'm also very happy to announce that the view count is well over 4000, with is just incredible, honestly. I honestly only wrote the prologue for a friend and posted it on tumblr, I never considered that a year later would I have published 13 more chapters with another 10 in draft. I also never anticipated all of the positive reviews or support (except for that one nasty Larry shipper.)  From the bottom of my heart, thank you. Here's to another year and 13 chapters.

Chapter 13 - The Two of Us.

Wednesday, July 6th, 2005.
Roy looked up from the model aeroplane he was working on as he heard creaking down the basement stairs.
"Hey." JC paused on the stairs, wearing a cream t-shirt and jeans.
His father, wearing a grey polo shirt and shorts, adjusted his glasses as he turned to look at him for a moment in silence. "How did you get in? I thought your mother was at the store."
"I know. Heather let me in."
"I thought she left with your mother. It was a shame you couldn't join us on Monday."
JC continued his way down to the basement, pulling up a chair next to the workbench Roy was sitting at. "What are you working on, there?"
"An Avro Lancaster, a heavy bomber used by the British in World War Two."
"That's nice."
"Where's Ellie?"
"She flew back into New York this morning. She has to go back to work tomorrow."
"You didn't want to go back with her?"
"I thought I should come and talk things over with you and Mom alone."
"What kind of things?"
"The engagement."
Roy gave off a long and weary sigh. "Why can't you accept that we're not going to see eye to eye right now?"
"No, I want you to hear me out. We know what we're getting ourselves into."
"I don't think you do."
"We'll work everything out. If you're hesitant about the financial situation..."
Roy let out a fed up grunt, rolling his eyes.
JC paused, then repeated himself, "If you're hesitant about the financial situation, we're both OK signing a prenup."
"It's not about that."
"What do you mean?"
Roy took his glasses off and turned his chair towards his son. "When your mother and I adopted you, we promised Catherine that we wouldn't let you get into any trouble."
"You're not being clear. I don't understand what you're trying to say."
"Look, Josh. I've seen so many friends go through divorces. What's going to happen in ten or fifteen years when she decides she isn't happy with you anymore? I'm guessing you're thinking about having children. Well, what happens if you do have children and she wants to go back to Louisiana to raise them? Have either of you spoken about that?"
"We've talked about it."
"Have you come to an agreement? Is she Mennonite?"
"She's Presbyterian."
Roy sighed. "Oh God." He placed his head into his hands. "Would she prefer Presbyterian children? I'm guessing she wants a Presbyterian wedding?"
"We haven't really talked about the kind of ceremony we want, just that she doesn't want a big southern wedding."
Roy let out a low grumble, stopping in thought. "What I'm trying to say, is that if you decide to marry, then you're not alone anymore. It might sound all fine and dandy, but it also means that you're not just looking out for yourself. You now have to take Ellie's feelings into consideration. Everything you do will affect her."
"I know, Dad."
"Really? I'm not just talking about little things like waking up at 2pm or what you're going to have for dinner. I mean big things as well. She'll become an influence on how you make decisions regarding your career. You'll have to think about her, and any future children, when you plan your schedule. You can't spend all night at the studio anymore because she'll be waiting at home for you. You can't spend months on the road. You either have to go back home regularly, or take everyone on tour. Do you want to be one of those pricks who takes a newborn on tour with them?"
JC leaned back into his chair.
"Families and children need stability. You can't just haul them around expecting them to stay healthy. You also can't push her away when you feel like things are getting too unfair for her and expect her to take it as lightly as the others. You're not just promising her just a good time or whatever, by saying you'd marry her. You're promising her a future. She's now planning a life around you. What happens when you can't, or possibly won't, deliver on any of the things you've promised her?"
A pointed air filled the basement, tension growing between them.

Roy sighed. "Josh...I'm not hesitant because I'm scared she's going to take your money. I'm scared that you're not responsible enough to understand the weight of the decision. If you marry Ellie, your life will never be the same. I'm scared that you don't understand that. I'm scared that you're only willing to be a boyfriend when she wants a husband. I'm scared that you might not be willing to grow up the way she needs you to. You barely have your own life together. Do you think you can create a stable one for her and your children, too?"
JC sniffed as he wiped a tear off his cheek. "Maybe."

"‘Maybe' doesn't cut it, Josh. It needs to be either a yes or a no. I'm not going to be OK with this when I know that you still need to grow up. For this to be successful, you need to be responsible enough to provide for and protect a family, responsible enough to know what's best. Even if that means knowing that you're too selfish to give up your life for another."
JC drew in a long breath. "OK."
"I know I'm being pragmatic-"
JC cut him off. "I get it, Dad. I've thought about this, all of this. Just because I haven't verbalised half of the shit you're going on about doesn't mean I haven't thought about it. I'll adapt as I go, OK."
"I just don't want you to make the wrong decision."
"Well, what if I'm making the right one, huh?"
"I just..."
"Dad, you just have to trust me, please."

Later that night, after flying back into New York, JC crept into the hotel suite. He placed his suitcase in the main living area and took his carry-on into the bedroom. He softly turned the lamp up to a hushed dim. A small smile came over his face as he watched Ellie sleep. "Hey, baby."
She jolted awake as he stroked her hair. "What the fuck? SHIT!" She sat for a moment, breathing heavily in shock. "I thought you were a murderer or something."
"It's OK."
"Why didn't you call me to tell me that your plane had gotten in?" She shuffled position, adjusting her pink t-shirt.
"I tried, but you never picked up."
She reached over and brightened the lamp "What the fuck were you doing?"
"I was just watching you sleep, that's all," he said as he kicked off his sneakers.
"Do you know how fucking creepy that is?"
"What? Like you don't watch me sleep?"
"Sometimes, yeah, if we're in bed together, but I don't sit on the edge of the bed fully clothed."
He pulled his shirt over his head. "Do you want me to get naked?"
"I'm still on my period."
"Ah, shucks, darn it."

He reached down and unzipped the bag. "I got you something. I saw this and thought about how you said you were missing Linus and how disappointed you were that you can't have him with us until next month." He flung a small, grey tabby kitten plush over the bed.
"Oh, my God, she's so fluffy. Aww, baby." She leaned over the bed and hugged him. "Thank you."
He gently kissed her. "Do you have a problem with the presents I buy you?"
"What? No. You've only gotten me, like, three things."
"You don't think I should be getting you more?"
"No, If anything, it would make things more uncomfortable. Why do you ask?"
He stood up and took off his jeans and socks. "I don't know. I saw this woman in the airport in Orlando decked out in Chanel. Like decked out-everything had a logo. And I was just thinking about the kind of shit I would have to pay for for some of the other women I've dated. I'm just surprised you haven't asked for a complete wardrobe overhaul."
"I like the way I dress. Most of it's your stuff anyway," she said with a chuckle.
He climbed into bed next to her. "I know, but don't you want a fancier engagement ring or something?"
"Well, I can just get a fancier wedding ring, can't I? I don't like the idea of you paying for all of these material things for me. Besides the fact that you're paying for the hotel and the apartment, I feel like it just highlights the, I don't know, pay gap or something." She snuggled down next to him. "Did you talk to your parents?"
"Only my dad. He thinks I might be too irresponsible to get married yet. I wasn't able to stick around long enough to talk to my mom."

Ellie sat for a moment in silence. "Do you agree with him?"
"I don't know. Maybe."
"You don't honestly think that?"
JC leaned his head on his fist. "Well, think of it this way; if we had a baby tomorrow, would you want to bring it home to a hotel room?"
"That's different. You usually have nine months to prepare for a baby. I don't have a shred of doubt that we would be able to find a permanent home before a baby came, the very thing we're in the process of doing, may I add. Nor do I think that you would be stupid enough to not at least get a crib or something."
"He says that I don't have my life together."
"Well, I don't either. I live out of a suitcase and my only dependant is currently living with my boss."
"What if he's right? What if I don't have my shit together and our relationship is only making it worse?"
"What if our relationship is you trying to get your shit together?"
"That's actually a really shitty thing, ‘cause if it's like that, then you're the only reason I'm doing anything right, or you're so tied up in the romance that you're allowing me to keep doing everything wrong until you're sick of it."
She let out a dismayed sigh. "Baby, I'm too tired to fight right now. What about all that spiel about not being too concerned with what other people think?"
He laid his head on his arm. "I don't want to fuck up your life..."
"But, you're not." She inched closer to him, grasping his jaw as she kissed him. "You haven't fucked up once."
"But, I will."
"Not at the rate you're going. Just go to sleep. We'll work through it."

Wednesday, July 13th, 2005.
JC sat on the hotel bed, flipping through channels in a pair of black trousers and a white undershirt. Ellie stepped out of the bathroom wearing a black mini dress. "Remember this?"
JC looked over at the little satin number. "Um..."
"It's the dress I wore after the Grammys."
"It looks cute. Where did you get it?"
She sat down at the vanity and started laying out the products and tools she needed to do her makeup. "Macy's, surprisingly enough. It's actually one of the newer formal pieces I own, well if you would call 2003 new, but since most the cocktail dresses I own date back to the sixties, it's new by my standards."
"That's nice."
She turned to him as she finished pinning her hair back into a high bun. "What's wrong? You're usually more talkative."
"Nothing's wrong."
"You're flipping through channels on a muted TV."
He turned off the TV and threw the remote onto the bed. "There, it's off."
"I didn't have a problem with that. It's just worrying to see you sitting there all quiet with your eyes glazed over like that. You're dealing with some stuff and it's bothering me."
"Nothing's bothering me."
"Do you still want to go out? I can call to cancel the reservation."
"Yeah, it's just that..."
She turned back to the mirror and started applying a powder foundation with a large makeup brush. "Do you want to talk about it now, or run the risk of making a scene in the restaurant?"
"Do I ask stupid questions?"
"Everyone does." She softly patted a grey shadow on her eyelid to create a smoky eye look.
"I was thinking about what I said to Dad, about the prenup. I feel stupid implying that he was only worried about that?"
"Just wait a little moment," she said as she delicately traced her eyeliner. "I'm really shit at this."
"At what?"
"Eyeliner." She froze still for a moment, blinking slowly to check if she had done it right. She picked up a tube of mascara and undid the cap. "What about the prenup?"
"I was just thinking if I shouldn't have used that as a justification point or whatever. I know he's been involved with some of my business, but he's just my dad. It's not like he's my manager or lawyer. It's just that everyone in the business is so focused on money that, especially with the lawsuit and everything, I can't help thinking that people will care about that."

He got off the bed and started putting a white dress shirt on. "I don't know. I just feel stupid for making the whole thing about the financial side of things. I feel no better than Lou."
She applied a coat of her usual rose pink lipstick and pressed her lips together. "I wouldn't go that far. It may feel soulless and petty, but you're only doing the mature thing in your situation."
"Are you still OK with it?"
"Yeah, I'm the one who first suggested a prenup. You're not getting the ranch if the sky turned red."
"Would you still sign it, like, definitely?"
"Only if it's fair."

She spritzed herself with two pulses of perfume as he pulled a black suit jacket on. "Do I have to wear a tie?"
"Only if you want to." She put on a pair of black heels and started prepping to leave.
"You're not wearing hard to get into underwear again, are you?"
"It's ninety degrees outside, I'm not wearing pantyhose in this weather. Also, I know I'm getting laid tonight, so I'm wearing nicer panties."
"Oooh."
"Oh, indeed. Little black lace ones." She checked her makeup in the mirror by the hotel door as he wrapped his arms around her waist.
"Look at us, we're quite the handsome couple, I think."
She glanced into the mirror, watching as he intertwined his fingers with hers, softly kissing her neck before he met her eyes in the reflection. "Why did you fall in love with me?"
"I couldn't stop myself fast enough."
"Would you have? If you could've?"
"Never. You swept me off my feet."
"I think the guy's supposed to do that, not the girl." She turned her head, his lips hovering over hers.
"I'm not sure we're doing anything we're supposed to."
"I love you," she mouthed the words in a barely audible whisper as she reached up to kiss him.
He turned her towards him. "Are you sure you want to go out still?"
"I need to eat."

Just after eight, they sat across from each other at the small dining table in the middle of the restaurant. Ellie took a small sip of white wine, before she placed the glass back on the white tablecloth. "Do you still want to come with me next week to L.A.? I got my assignment for the next issue. Maurice lined up an interview with a costume designer who did some pieces for Freddie Mercury and Blondie in the ‘80s. I was thinking, after I'm done, we could take a drive down the coast or something. Just a little day trip out of the city."
"What kind of wedding do you want?" JC undid and redid the button on his left sleeve.
"I'm not sure. I never thought I was actually getting married until recently...I'm still not completely sure I am."
"Do you still want a beach wedding?"
"Do you want a beach wedding? Are you OK getting sand in your suit?"
"I don't know. I just think we have to figure these things out soon."
"Yeah, soon. Not now. Let's just have a fun night and we'll discuss it later. How did your meeting with Eric go?"
"Well." JC straightened himself in his chair. "He said that I have three options as far as record labels go. The first option would be to form my own label and go completely independent, meaning we would have to handle most of the stuff ourselves. We would have to organise promotion and distribution in house, as well as fund everything, but I would get full creative control. The second option would be to form my own print label with another label taking on the role for distribution and such. My third option, the safest, but coincidently, the option Eric doesn't want to choose, would be to find a label, preferably a big and established one, that will sign me. The problem with that route is, I risk getting into the same bind I was in with Jive, with or without the situation with Justin and Johnny. Eric doesn't want me to go in that direction."
Ellie tucked a stray strand of hair behind her ear. "What do you feel like doing?"
"I've got a friend who's interested. His label's roster has a few different clients: a few rappers, few singer/songwriter types. It's more of a passion project for him. He'll give me full creative control if I'm willing to pay for the studio time and stuff. He has a team that will deal with marketing, etc. It's not, say Capitol Records, but I'll be able to do my stuff without anyone interjecting."
"Is that what you want?"
"Maybe? I was kinda hoping that once we get settled into the apartment, maybe I can start recording again. I've got a few ideas I want to try out. It'll be nice instead of sitting around all day watching TV."
"I'm assuming that you won't be dumb enough to sign a contract solely so you can start recording." Ellie delicately took another sip of wine.
He readjusted his collar, trying to flatten it. "Pff, no. I just want to make music again. I've sent myself so many voicemails, my message bank is full."
"I could get you a dictaphone for your birthday. I got a good deal on one recently."
"That would be the nerdiest birthday present ever...well, second nerdiest one I've ever received, after the lightsaber Chris got me that one year in Europe."
"Mmmm, no." Ellie shook her head, placed her wine glass down. "I got a typewriter for my 10th birthday. With the exception of that one boy whose dad had a matrix printer, I was the only kid in the fifth grade who handed in typed assignments."
"Really?" He rested his chin in his hand, elbow on the table.
"Yeah, a blue and white Petite 500. I felt so fancy." Ellie slid her hands across the tabletop, making a tight lipped but ironic smile.

He took his arm off the table, staring at her. "Wait..."
She looked up from fidgeting with the napkin on her lap. "What?"
"It's just..." He reached over the table. "You've got a little something..." With a single finger, he lightly tapped her on the nose.
She smiled, giving off a short exhale. "You're such a fucking doofus."
"I know."

After dinner, JC pulled Ellie in for a kiss just as they left the restaurant, unable to spend another moment apart from her. "Just wait until we get back to the room."
"Are you going to make love to me?" she whispered, unable to stop herself from giggling.
"I'm going to love your fucking brains out."
She pulled on his hand. "Let's walk back to the hotel. It's only a few blocks."
"Do we have to?"
"If you want to be a true New Yorker, you need to get used to walking everywhere. Anyway, I know a shortcut."

After a few blocks, she led him across a crosswalk to a small, fenced park: the centrepiece of which was a three-tiered stone fountain. She stepped up onto the edge of the fountain as he wrapped his arms around her legs. She leaned down to kiss him. "What's the most romantic thing you can think of saying right now?"
"You look really beautiful in that dress."
"Thank you."
"I'm only saying it to get into your pants." He playfully squeezed his arms around her thighs.
"Have you always been this charming?"
"Maybe?"

She softly kissed him again, running her fingers through his hair. "How do you want to get married?"
"I don't know. I'm a guy. I never really thought about it."
"You must have at one point."
"Get down from there." He carefully lifted her and placed her back on the ground, returning to the previous subject. "Not really."
They started walking around the fountain and onwards to the hotel, Ellie snuggling herself underneath JC's arm. "OK then, what does a Mennonite wedding entail?"
"A lot of religious formality. I'm not sure you want to know."
"No, tell me."
"OK, well traditionally, implying both the bride and groom are of the faith, they sit down with both sets of parents and come to an agreement over the formalities of the marriage. If an agreement can be set, the couple usually marry in a small, simple ceremony at her parents' home, then there's a reception with cake but no alcohol or dancing."
"Are you OK with that?"
"No, there's a few things I need to tell you. If we choose to marry in my faith, both of our parents need to give consent, otherwise an elder won't perform the rite. That's kind of why I want my folks to be OK with us getting married. It's a big issue that you respect your elders in my faith, and if my folks don't consent to the marriage, they have the power to prevent us from marrying in the faith."
"Are you sure you mean consent?"
"In religious terms, yes."
"What if you go against their wishes?"
"At the worst, I could be excommunicated from my family and the church."
"Is that something you want to avoid?"
"There's another thing. I risk excommunication if I marry someone outside my faith."
She stopped and turned to face him. "You don't just mean another religious sect, you also mean all other Christian denominations, don't you?"
"Yeah."
"Including Presbyterianism?"
"Yeah."
"We're fucked. Is there anyway around it?"
"Yes, either conversion or we just don't do it that way."
"It doesn't matter to you?"
He started walking again. "What does it matter anyway? Neither of us go to church regularly." He tucked his hands into his pockets.
"Were you able to resolve things with your dad?"
"I don't know. I'm hoping that if we don't rush into it, he might come around eventually."

Ellie was quiet for most of the way home. She took her shoes off immediately as they entered the hotel room and walked past JC to go into the bedroom to unpin her hair.

"Fuck," she said as she threw her hair tie onto the vanity, "I'm fucking getting sick of this. Every time we talk about this fucking wedding, we talk about the boring adult stuff like prenups or what your parents think. We never talk about any of the fun stuff. What happened to all of those things that we talked about after you first proposed, huh?"
He entered the room and took off his jacket, shirt and undershirt before he slid behind her and wrapped his arms around her waist again. "Do you still want to get married?"
"Yes. I love you. I want to marry you. It's just that I thought that we would be more excited about it."
He brushed her hair over her left shoulder to bare her right, tenderly kissing her. "We are excited; we're excited about moving out of this hotel room and into our own place. We're excited about bringing Linus home and the three of us becoming a little family together. We're excited about the fact that one day we're going to be husband and wife and we're going to have babies and stuff. We've just got some other things to deal with first, then we'll do all the other stuff. We're just not ready yet."
She looked back at him through the vanity's mirror. "What if we're never ready?"
"I don't know. Can we please...no."
"What?"
He slowly ran his hand over the curve of her waist. "I'm a little bit drunk. I'm not really in the mood to sit and figure all of this out right now. I was under the impression that we were coming home to..."
She sighed in frustration. "Baby, I wanted to do that, too. But we need to at least come to a basic understanding of how we're going to do this."
"Well, how about this? When we're ready, we go to City Hall or something and have the ceremony there, then that night we have a black tie cocktail party reception."
"What about my parents? This is maybe their only opportunity to see me get married."
"We'll ask close family to come with us for the ceremony."
"I'm not sure."
"It's only a very basic idea of how we could do things." He gently gathered her dress and pulled it upwards, baring her panties. "I was thinking that after the party, we could find somewhere a little private and..."
"And?"
He slowly slipped his hand across the trim of her panties, slowly reaching down underneath the band, running his fingertips along the lips of her pussy. "Well, you're supposed to fuck on your wedding night, aren't you?"
"Yes." She groaned as he teased her. "Consummation is a vital element at the start of a marriage. So important, in fact, that I think it might be a good idea if we practice it, for when we have to do it, so we get it perfect on the first go. We'll only have one chance at it."
"Maybe we should start practicing now."
"That might be one of your more brilliant ideas, yet." She turned around and ran her fingers over his chest. "Smart and beautiful."

He deeply kissed her, scooping her into his arms and throwing her across the bed, climbing on top of her to straddle her. He unzipped her dress and slid it up over her head, throwing it onto the floor before he undid her bra, sliding it off her as he took her left nipple into his mouth, biting down on the sensitive and soft, pink peak. He got off the bed as he slid her panties down her legs and ankles, dropping them to the floor as he undid his belt.

"Holy shit," she whispered as he took his pants off to reveal his hardened penis. He took a condom off the nightstand and tore the package open, rolling it down the head and shaft of his cock, climbing on top of her again, spreading her legs before he entered her. She gasped when he found her clit with his thumb and started rubbing as he, at first, gently started thrusting into her.

"Jesus Christ." She groaned as her sides and the muscles in her pelvis started to tighten. She reached up and grabbed the edge of the mattress, whispering, "Fuck me, Daddy," in a barely audible moan.

She tightened her thighs around his waist, letting out a cry as she came. She reached up and dislodged his hand, pulling his arm, asking him to meet her face-to-face. He repositioned himself, kissing her as he intertwined his fingers in hers, holding them above her head. He bit her shoulder as he upped his momentum.

Out of the corner of her eye, she caught a glimpse of the reflection in the mirror, of her legs wrapped around his ass as he pounded into her. That can't be me, she thought to herself in a state of near disbelief. The old her would never have sex like this, would never be in love or engaged. She felt a pang in her gut.

"I love you," she softly whispered in his ear. She was taken by surprise when he kissed her, a single tear running down her cheek as he stopped. She wrapped her arms around him as she knew he had come.

"I love you, too," he whispered in belated response.
"I'm very lucky to have you."
"What?" He turned her face to look her in the eyes. "Are you crying?"
"I'm just so happy."
"Why?"
"You saved me."
"From what?" He turned them over to their sides. "Please don't tell me you were suicidal whilst I'm still in you. I will take you to the hospital if I have to."
"No, like spinsterhood or something. I was someone very different this time last year, and you came in and changed everything."
"Are you trying to suggest that me, Joshua the fuck-up, somehow managed to change your life for the better?"
"Well, Joshua is Hebrew for saviour."
"Joshua's also a name that's been popular for around fifty years or so." He ran his fingertips along her thigh. "Why do you feel that?"
"I don't know, I just do."
"I don't deserve you."
"What? And I deserve you? You're this incredibly sexy man who's sweet and funny and I'm just some bitch who wasn't good enough to keep a piece of shit faithful."
"You've kept me faithful."
"Not one?"
"Not one, or two or three or whatever. I haven't been with another woman but you since I broke up with Eva."
"Why?" She untangled them and crawled under the covers.
"You know when you realise you hate somebody and their voice starts sounding like a chainsaw, or at least as vicious as a chainsaw?" He got up off the bed and disposed of the condom into a waste basket in the bathroom. He returned to the bedroom and got into the bed with her. "Well, a few weeks before the Grammys, we went to Mexico for a vacation or something. She, of course, tipped the paparazzi off beforehand. So she's there in all of these obviously expensive clothes with this $7000 luggage, flashing all of these new riches, including a new pair of tits, demanding that I pay for everything. We got into a huge argument because one night I dared to suggest that maybe, since she was earning so much an episode, she could pay for dinner just for one night. She basically said that I didn't love her and that real gentlemen pay for everything. When we got back to L.A., she went off with some other guy and I started ignoring her calls. She eventually stopped calling altogether." He traced around her fingers. "I was really fucking pissed at myself for getting myself into that situation. Despite this, I got really excited when Eric told me that Clefnotes wanted to do a follow-up interview."
"No, you didn't."
"No, I did. I was all like 'oh my god, Ellie?' when he told me that someone had called to schedule the interview. You were just this little ray of sunshine last September. I couldn't wait to see you again. I was so bummed out when he said it would most likely be a phone interview. I never would've thought you were depressed or lonely until Craig told me he thought you were back in April. I honestly thought you were surrounded by people who loved you."
"Yeah, but I wasn't in love."
"Being in love is different than having someone who truly loves you."

She snuggled into his chest, turning him onto his back. "What's the difference?"

"I don't know."

"How am I different from Eva?"

He softly ran his fingers through her hair. "A lot of girls just see me as the list of perks they receive by dating me. You were kind of like ‘Hey, this guy's a person. I'd like to get to know him a little better.'"

"Why did you fall in love with me? I mean really, not some poetic line about falling in love. Why do you love me?"

He thought for a moment. "I fell in love with you because I think you wanted to fall in love with me. Not me as in JC Chasez though, not this fantasy about falling in love with someone from *NSYNC, well someone formerly of *NSYNC. None of that fake, bullshit, bravado crap. Just me, Josh. Ever since I told you my name, you've only called me Josh except if it was to bother me."

"I don't feel like JC belongs to me. I feel like he's some property that was created by Disney, then passed on to *NSYNC, then to Jive and your fans. He's not who I come home to. I come home to Josh."

"That's the thing. You've managed to do something not even I could do. You've not only managed to separate JC from Josh, or at least instantaneously recognise that there is a difference, but you've also created a place where Josh can exist without being overshadowed by JC. No one was able to do that, not even me. I could only do that if I was completely by myself. Even the relationship I have with my parents is poisoned by it. Everything with everybody flows back to my career. Except, for some reason, you. Maybe it's because you only see Josh. Maybe it's because I now feel so comfortable around you that I can only be Josh."

She mumbled into his chest. "You know, we sound like a bad, romance novel lead couple. You've saved me, and I've taught you how to be yourself again."

"When you think about it, we actually have a rather toxic, codependent relationship...Ow."

She rose up to her elbows. "I'm the sweet Southern belle who taught the rockstar how to love again."

"Baby, your elbows are digging into me."

Chapter End Notes:
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