Author's Chapter Notes:
JC does some TV promotional work.

Chapter 33 - Dear Diary


Saturday, July 15th, 2006.

JC gets out of the car wearing a grey t-shirt and jeans. He adjusts his sunglasses as he introduces himself. "Hey, guys. I'm JC Chasez. I'm doing a photoshoot for Entertainment Weekly on top of"—he points to the skyscraper behind him—"that building, today. Welcome to MTV Diary. You think you know, but you have no idea."


After a credits sequence, JC sits on a couch in front of a window overlooking Los Angeles. He tugs on his faded red t-shirt, printed with an image of the grill of a vintage car. "The last few years for me have just been completely insane: just the whole drama with the label change and releasing my first record as well as...unexpectedly becoming a husband and father. Things are kind of whacked out, especially since I'm trying to launch a new single and the next stage of my career whilst everything's kinda happening at once." He widens his eyes, making a surprised whimpering. "It's just insane. Everything is just incredibly insane and stressful."

The show flips back to the photoshoot: footage of the city, a pigeon pecking around on the rooftop and the photographer setting up. The camera pans over a wardrobe rack, then shows JC tying a tie then putting on a blazer over a jeans, tie and button up ensemble.

The show goes back to the talking head segment. "I've really grown up the last few years or so. I've also gotten a much better idea of who I am as a musician outside of what's expected of me as a celebrity or a former boyband member. I kind of want the album to reflect that, both in a musical sense, but also in a visual sense."

The show flips back to footage of the photoshoot, of JC in front of the camera posing. He says in voice-over: "Anyway, I think I look rather dapper in a suit." JC smirks, then chuckles.


Footage of the photoshoot plays on, his manager, Eric, and label head, Alex, being introduced.

"Better get the subtitles ready!" Alex exclaims. "They'll be burning through their tape recorders trying to understand me if ya don't." Alex is indeed accompanied by subtitles.

The three of them powwow with Alex holding what is obviously a large bottle of champagne in a plastic shopping bag.

"I've got some good news and some bad news," Eric says, adjusting his sea green polo shirt.

"OK...give me the good news first."

Eric clicks his tongue. "I kind of want to give you the bad news first."

"OK..."

"I unfortunately can confirm that 'Sexyback' or whatever it's called..."

"That ostrich ain't that sexy..." Alex mutters as he starts to undo the foil on the champagne.

"Don't you think that's it's a little too early for champagne?" JC asks.

"If it ain't too early for Winston Churchill during the war, it ain't too early for us."

"Anyway," Eric pipes up, "the good news is that you got the first U.S. number one record on the Excelsior label."

Alex pops open the champagne. "Ay!"

JC gets a bewildered look on his face. "How?"

Eric shrugs, pulling a printout of the Billboard Hot 100 for July 15th out of his pocket, pointing out the number one spot: “JC Chasez - Until Yesterday - Excelsior Records."

"I mean, if they say so," JC mumbles. "It is a Timbaland song."


The show flips back to the talking head segment. "Never in a million years did I expect this to happen, not once but twice in two completely different stages of my career. It's just mindblowing. I'm really lucky for this to happen."

Footage is shown of JC being sprayed with the champagne, then drinking straight out of the bottle. He says in voice-over: "I'm not naturally very competitive, especially with these kinds of things, but with so many people who are around me, it's hard not to get a little competitive occasionally. It's nice to celebrate the victories, you know?" Footage of him smiling with the champagne bottle plays before a title graphic for MTV Diary. "You think you know, but you have no idea."


The show goes to commercial.


Stock footage of the city plays out. A generic awning in front of a Lower East Side apartment building is shown and it flips into footage of JC's apartment. Focus is pulled to a flower arrangement on the kitchen counter, a wedding portrait at Central Park on a bookshelf, the piano and Linus resting in the sling of his cat tree.

JC points Linus out. "That's Linus. I wouldn't bother him too much. He'll just sit there and look over everything."


JC, Alex and Eric are talking out business papers, discussing rehearsal schedules and promotional appearances.

Ellie storms into the apartment. She's wearing a white tank top underneath a light grey blazer, and a matching grey pencil skirt. She removes her blazer before slamming it and her purse onto the counter. She is very pregnant. She sharply exhales a few times, resting her head into her hands.

"You OK?" JC asks.

She lifts her head, a frustrated look on her face. "I don't think I want to go with that obstetrician." A graphic explains that an obstetrician is a doctor that delivers babies.

"What's wrong?"

"I just got *beep*ing lectured because I requested that unless there's an emergency, I don't want any unnecessary interventions during my birth. This *beep*ing dinosaur who was practicing back when you didn't need to wash your hands to deliver a baby just *beep*ing suggested that I'm not only stupid because I'm a woman, but mega stupid because I'm a pregnant woman that had no idea about her *beep*ing body or baby. Do you know why America has a high infant/mother mortality rate for a developed nation? It's literally because childbirth has become *beep*ing industrialised in this *beep*ed up country." She huffs in dismay.

"I thought you were going with a midwife or whatever?" JC asks.

Ellie sighs. "Alice wants me to find an obstetrician I'm comfortable with in case something goes wrong."

"Why don't you just go with the doctor on call then?" Eric suggests.

"Don't *beep*ing tell me what to do with my body!" Ellie cusses out.


The show flips back to JC's talking head footage. "One of the things I love most about Ellie is that she is so opinionated. She's never scared of saying exactly what she thinks. You know exactly where she sits on everything. I really love that about her. Unfortunately, it does sometimes mean she's upset or something. One of the more unfortunate things about her pregnancy is that she's having some struggles with the idea that she doesn't have complete control over her body right now...and the American health system is not helping at all."


The show flips back to the scene in the apartment. "I've only got around 15 weeks to work through this. On the subject of 15 weeks, blah...Susie's, the baby boutique by my work, says that they can take up to 2 months to be delivered. I was wondering if you wanted to go around soon to least look at what they've got. There's a crib I've been looking at that's streamlined with a teak finish."

"Why don't you just order that one?" JC suggests.

"I want you to come with me," Ellie responds.

"We're just going to end up arguing," JC points out.

"So. Best case scenario, we have a magical experience"—Ellie waves her hands around—"where we pick out all of our nursery furniture; worst case scenario, we have our argument and I get the crib from IKEA the week before I deliver." She leans against the counter, a sly smile on her face. "I want to get flat-pack furniture just to piss you off."

JC gets up from the kitchen table. “Of course you do.” He walks over to Ellie, lightly kissing her on the lips.


The show flips to Ellie standing by the counter. In her Southern purr, she states, “We’re a completely normal couple. Though we really do love each other and enjoy each others company, we can truly frustrate each other from time to time.” Footage is shown of Ellie and JC kissing and laughing. “One of the hardest things about being married to JC is that I find him so sexually attractive that every little thing he does feels like he’s flirting with me”—she gestures to her belly—“and, as you can obviously see, I cannot at all help myself.” She laughs, sweeping her golden brown hair behind her shoulders.

The show cuts to commercial.


Wednesday, July 26th, 2006.

Stock footage of New York plays, skyscrapers and yellow taxis and the like. This footage is intercepted with talking head footage of JC. "I've been in the industry for around 15 years now. It was OK at the beginning, but over the last few years, I was kind of starting to feel like, and frankly resent, I was putting my life on hold for the sake of my career." Footage is show of JC and Ellie in the back seat of a car. In voice-over, he says, "It's been hard trying to develop a balance for everything, but I'm also finding out how rewarding it is to make time just for my relationship."


JC checks his phone. He’s wearing a black t-shirt and jeans. "I just got an email from Justin. He wants to know if I'm having a birthday party next week."

Ellie grunts, adjusting herself. She’s wearing an oversized white t-shirt and denim shorts. “Motherf…"

"You do know that they're going to use any footage that they want, right, despite how..."—he pauses—"incriminating it is?"

"No, not that. I think she kicked my bladder again." Ellie squirms in her seat. "I remember when she started moving and it was magical flutters here and there. Now I feel like I'm living the kitchen scene from Alien."


Ellie looks directly at the camera. "Why do I need to be in this again?"

JC adjusts his sunglasses. "To probably sell this idea that I'm now a loving husband and expectant father to combat certain rumours about a certain video and a certain petite, brunette actress and whether or not I've moved on from her." He sighed. "I'm really pissed that her, sorry"—he makes quotation marks with his fingers—"'sources' leaked that article about me not being able to get over the fact that she's now engaged." He sighed again, shrugging his shoulders. "I mean, they even pulled into question the..." He grunts in frustration.

"Whether or not the baby's even yours," Ellie finishes his sentence.

"Well...yeah. How classless do you have to be to even suggest that?" He scratches his head. "I could strangle Alex for signing that deal with Justin and Tim. Out of all the songs that could've been the lead single."

"Didn't I say the exact same things you just did back in April?" Ellie pipes up.

"I'm pretty sure I didn't just call myself a stupid C-word."

Ellie nods, giving a thumbs up. "OK."


The show flips to the store front of a nursery furniture store, “Susie's” written in curly, pink, type font on the glass panel above the door.

JC inspects a pink gingham crib bumper. "Why is everything so...girly?"

"Probably because our society considers child rearing as the ultimate traditionally feminine act, so babies equal feminine, and by that extension, nursery furniture and trimmings also equal traditional femininity, so either everything looks like a Victorian era porcelain doll threw up everywhere, or if it is designed to represent the male gender and the norms we push onto boys, it's the most palatable representation for even the most girly of the girliest," Ellie theorises. "Because, ew, sports," she says dryly.

JC pauses in confusion. “OK, I guess.”


Ellie walks over to a line of cribs, standing in front of one of simple design with a light finish. “This is the one I like. It has an adjustable base and it converts into a toddler bed. It also has a good safety rating.”

JC looks around the store. “I mean, it’s nice…”

“OK.” She sighs. “You got me. It looks exactly like the crib my granddaddy built for me. I always had this stupid fantasy about being able to use my crib for my babies, but it’s been awhile and it’s probably not safe anymore and even if it was, it would be too much of a hassle to ship my crib up here from home and when I saw this one I just instantly fell in love with it—”

He cuts her off. “I love it.”

She wipes her eyes as she starts crying. “Really?”

He nods his head. “If you love it, I love it. It’s fantastic.”

“Baby…” She practically leaps at him, wrapping her arms around him. “Thank you.”


The show flips to JC's talking head interview. "I’ve never been in love like this before. I’ve never been with someone who I don’t feel like I constantly need to prove how much I love them. I know that she already knows that. Plus, I’ve never been with someone who gets me the way she does, you know?" Footage plays of JC cuddling a teary Ellie, lightly kissing her forehead before she kisses his lips. He draws her closer.


The show cuts to commercial.


Friday, August 4th, 2006.

Stock footage of Los Angeles plays, images of palm trees, the Hollywood sign and Beverly Hill Hotel flashing on the screen. An establishing shot of a rehearsal space is shown, as well as interior shots. JC scrunches his face, scratching his nose before opening his eyes, grunting in frustration. “I don’t think we’re ever going to get this right.”

Eric rushes up to the mic stand. “You’re doing great,” he reassures JC.

“I don’t know.” JC lifts his cap off, swiping his hair before placing it back on. “The audio sounds a little tinny.”

“It’s probably just the rehearsal space. Let’s keep final judgements regarding the sound until we get into the auditorium to rehearse,” Eric suggests.


Talking head footage of Eric shows. He's standing in front of where the band is set up. He’s wearing a white polo shirt and khakis. “One of the biggest problems with managing JC is that despite his talent, he never really feels like he’s good enough. Even if everything’s perfect, he zeroes in on the one flaw, then makes this big, anxious deal about it.” Footage of Eric patting JC on the back rolls. “I kind of wish at least someone on his old team was more encouraging during the establishment of his solo career. With all the negative feedback and lack of support, he really underestimates himself and his abilities, especially outside of the group. Despite the fact that he's more than capable.”


Footage of Ellie reading a paperback novel sitting in the back of the rehearsal space roles. She’s wearing a yellow tank top and denim shorts.

JC calls out to her, “Am I doing OK?”

Ellie lifts her head. “You’re doing great, baby!” She gives a thumbs up.


Saturday, August 5th, 2006.

Stock footage of L.A. roles. Establishing shots of the venue for the Teen Choice Awards plays, crew members setting up, unrolling a blue carpet. A few seconds of rehearsal and soundcheck footage of JC’s performance plays. Ellie is approached by Jessica Simpson.

Jessica asks if she can kiss Ellie’s “belly.”

Ellie responds instantly, “*beep* no.”

Scenes change to JC and Ellie sitting on a row of folding chairs backstage. JC and Ellie are both wearing white tank tops and jeans.

JC puts his head between his knees. “I can’t do this, I can’t do this, I can’t do this, I can’t do this…” he repeats over and over again, anxiously.

Ellie rubs his back, reassuring him, “You’ll be fine. You’ll be fine.”

He sits up, covering his eyes. “I’m going to ruin everything.”

“Baby, we both know how these things work. Even if you don’t give the best performance of the night, you’re going to have to fail spectacularly for anyone to make even a fuss about it,” she points out, intertwining her fingers in his. “OK? Look, look, a heavily pregnant Britney Spears is here. No one knows that Britney’s even here, let alone that she’s introducing you. Plus, plus, Jessica Simpson’s hosting. If you weren’t performing, I would be watching with a notepad marking off any instance where she abuses the English language. Plus there’s going to be that cheap stunt with her and those grill mouthguard things that’s now popular in hip hop. You know, with the diamonds or rubies or whatever? People are going to be talking about that. OK?”

“OK.” He nodded.

“OK.” She rests her chin onto his shoulder. “Anyway, I’ve been here all day with you, and even if you miserably *beep* up, I’ve already seen all of the performers, and I still think you’ll be the best one.” She puts on a cute voice. “‘Cause you’re super talented, and handsome, and just really awesome overall.” She runs her fingers through his hair. “You can do this. I know you can.”


A last talking head of JC plays as footage of him getting ready to perform plays. “I’m really excited for this next stage of my life and career to start, even if it gets a little scary at times. I’m really lucky to be surrounded by people who support me no matter what and who are encouraging me to be the best I can be.” Footage of JC kissing Ellie then putting his ear monitor in before walking on stage plays. “You think you know, but you have no idea.”


A very pregnant Britney Spears waddles on stage in a pretty lilac maternity dress and her black hair in a half up, half down do. She stands in front of the hosting podium in the centre of the stage, smiling as the crowd dies down. “Hey y’all.” She waves. “Our next, and last, performer of the night is someone I’ve had the pleasure of knowing and being able to call a friend for 14 years since we were both on the Mickey Mouse Club. Since then, we’ve seen him develop into the definite most talented, and frankly sexiest, member of pop sensation, *NSYNC. If I had known he was into Louisianan girls, I would’ve snatched him up for myself,” she joked. “Anyway, it is my honest most pleasure to present him to perform his number one single, ‘Until Yesterday,’ the one and only: JC Chasez.”


The camera sweeps over the cheering audience as the opening riff plays. JC, now wearing a white button down shirt with the sleeves rolled up under a black vest, is frozen still as he starts singing, grasping the mic stand. As the rhythm kicks in, he starts to relax, his body moving with the beat at the end of each line. He places his hand on his chest for the bridge. He goes on to punctuate the beat of the chorus with his right hand. He takes the mic out of the stand during the intro to the second verse, throwing the mic stand down on the word “damn.” He walks to the front of the stage, rolling his pelvis as he sings “sexing with another man.” He continues to strut across the stage for the second chorus. He pop and locks a dance break, precisely moving his feet with every beat and bass lick during the instrumental break, falling to his knees as the final bridge starts. With a flask of pyro and the release of confetti, the final chorus play as he ups his energy. He ad-libs an insane vocal run, the song crashing to a halt as the crowd gives ovation. He grins, bowing as the camera flips to an extremely proud Ellie standing by the stage.

Chapter End Notes:
Originally posted August 8th 2017


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Story Tags: daddyjc marriedjc jc solojc