~~~~~*~~~~~

Clare slouched down unhappily in one of the metal benches in the airport's departure lounge as she waited for an opportunity to make her escape. Already this morning she'd been forced out of her apartment by the members of *NSYNC, endured a forty minute cab ride to the airport—protesting all the way that she was not going to accompany them on tour—and now she was stuck being watched like a hawk whilst the group waited to be called to their flight.

Clare was very nearly out of hope—and options.

She'd already made several attempts to escape. She’d even tried to make a run for it as soon as the taxi cab had pulled to a stop outside the terminal building. However, Chris had had her number on that one and he'd bolted out of the cab behind her and dragged her right back.

Thanks to that final unsuccessful attempt he was now keeping even stronger tabs on her, and Clare had begun to realise that despite her protestations, it looked very likely that she would be spending the next few months on a too-small tour bus, travelling around Europe on *NSYNC's 'Ain't No Stopping Us Now' tour.

"God, I ache!" Chris complained as he lifted his arms and began to swing them around in a windmill formation in an attempt to ease the cramping pain that had developed between his shoulder blades. Clare narrowed her eyes as he shot her a pointed look. She had no sympathy for him.

"You insisted on carrying me to the taxi," she reminded him moodily. "That's your penance for kidnapping me."

"It was a necessary evil," Chris replied as he glanced away from her sulking face to check once again that he'd remembered to bring his passport. It was the one thing that he'd been required to bring from home—the rest being handled by the group's Assistant Tour Manager, and his current girlfriend, Jamie—and he knew that there'd be hell to pay if he'd forgotten.

"Necessary, my ass," Clare replied sullenly as she frowned back at him. "It was necessary for me to get a few more hours sleep. It was necessary for me to continue looking for another job..."

Realising that she was running out of time, Clare decided to quickly change tactics. She leaned forward in her chair and smiled sweetly at him, widening her eyes and fluttering her eyelashes ever so slightly. "How about we forget about this tour nonsense,” she said, “and you just let me go home, hmmm? You don't want my miserable face looking back at you for the next however many weeks, do you?

Chris snorted, amused by her attempt to get around him. It was not going to work. "No, I don't," he replied with a chuckle causing Clare's face to break out into a relieved smile. "But neither do I want to have to look at his miserable face either." Chris gestured with a nod of his head at JC and Clare followed his gaze, the smile tightening on her face. One look at JC and her hope was gone.

He was sitting as far away from the group as was possible whilst still remaining within earshot. His head was bowed and resting forward onto his chest as he caught up on some much needed sleep. Although he looked as though he were deeply asleep, Clare knew that he would wake with a simple nudge or word. He would never allow himself to fall deeply asleep in such a public place.

"He's happier with you around," Chris continued as Clare watched the steady rise and fall of JC's chest. At the sound of Chris' words, Clare's eyes narrowed. She already knew that Chris' plan was a stupid one, but she was only just beginning to realise his full intentions. She wasn't happy, to say the least.

"He's not happier when I'm around," She objected vehemently as she turned back to face Chris. "We both hate each other and that's the way it's going to stay."

Chris smiled a full, cocky grin which sent Clare's blood boiling. He really shouldn't be enjoying this as much as he was. "We'll see," he said with a chuckle. "You'll be living out of each other's pockets for the next few months. Anything could happen."

"Wow, you think you're so clever, don't you, Kirkpatrick?"

Chris beamed. "No. I know I'm clever."

~~~~~*~~~~~

"...Good morning, ladies and gentlemen, this is your captain speaking. On behalf of the crew, may I welcome you aboard this British Airways flight 31624 service from Orlando International to Birmingham International Airport. Once we get airborne today, our flight time will be approximately nine hours. Once again, may we thank you for choosing to fly with us today, and we wish you a pleasant journey."

God, Clare thought miserably as she listened to the pilot's announcement over the plane's intercom. It's really happening. They've actually managed to pull this off.

Clare twisted around in her chair to glare once again at Chris, who was sitting a seat away from her across the aisle on the right hand side of the plane. He met her eyes and grinned, even raised his hand to wave his hand goofily in her direction. Clare bit down hard on her bottom lip to prevent an expletive from slipping out.

"Who do I have to blame for this again?" she asked angrily as she turned to Jamie, who was sat beside her. Jamie rolled her eyes skyward and continued to flick through the inflight magazine that she'd found. It was pretty grim reading, but at least it was something to do.

"Don't look at me," she replied simply, her eyes never leaving the glossy pages. "You've got dumb and dumber to blame for that."

"I knew it," Clare growled as she turned back around to face Chris and made a cutting gesture underneath her chin with her index finger. Chris laughed and nudged Joey—who was sat beside him—and the pair of them openly laughed at the furious expression on her face. Clearly they were thrilled that their evil plan had worked.

This is bad. Very bad, Clare thought as the plane began taxiing up the runway. She grasped tightly onto the arm rests until her knuckles went white from the strain. If her willingness alone could have prevented the plane from taking off then its wheels would never have left the tarmac.

The only thing Clare could hope for was that there would be a soon-to-depart flight waiting for her at the other end that could bring her straight back home in nine hours’ time. For there was no way that she was going to spend the next few months on tour with *NSYNC. Of that she was one–hundred percent certain.

~~~~~*~~~~~

"Are you okay, baby?" Justin asked in a whisper as he leaned towards Libby who was sitting in the window seat beside him. Her face was pale as she peered anxiously out of the window, watching as the plane lifted up off the tarmac and pointed its nose to the sky. Libby turned to face him and gave him as brave a smile as she could manage, but it didn't reach her eyes.

Now that it was actually happening, Libby wasn't sure that this was such a good idea. She’d been swept away by Justin—and the other men’s—enthusiasm about taking her and Clare with them on tour, and despite there having been a very small voice in her head that had told her to take a step back and really think it through, she’d allowed herself to get carried along with the preparations without really thinking about the realities of being on tour.

She’d so badly wanted to go with them that she hadn’t even dwelled on the niggling doubts that had tried to convince her that she shouldn’t. It wasn’t that she’d been careless about it—Justin had taken care of all the details, even going so far as to book an appointment with her consultant to discuss their opinions on Libby travelling abroad—but she had to admit to herself that she hadn’t quite been as honest as perhaps she could have, or should have been.

When Justin had asked her if she thought she was up to touring she’d said yes. Had it been the truth? She wasn’t sure. But then she’d assumed that she’d be spending most of her time on the bus or at a hotel. What would be so tiring about that?

When her consultant had asked her if she’d been suffering from any pain, nausea, headaches or fever she’d said no. Not really. Not unmanageably so, anyway. They’d told her to expect some adverse reaction after her accident, and so she’d assumed that everything was normal. Everything was normal, she kept telling herself. The headaches weren’t that bad, and she’d been given almost a lifetimes worth of Tylenol for use when she felt she needed it, so obviously they’d expected her to feel a little achy and sore now and then. Maybe not all the time, but still…

And she wasn’t stupid. She’d known what they’d really been asking her. If she’d mentioned anything about her lack of appetite, the nausea or the pounding headaches she had from dawn till dusk they’d never have let her leave the hospital, let alone the country.

And she wasn’t going to let anything keep her from Justin. Of that, above all, she was adamant. She’d put up with whatever to have more time with him.

She hadn’t said anything to anyone—she wouldn’t have dared—but until his mention of the plan to bring her on tour, she’d had sleepless nights full of frantic dreams about him leaving. It’d made her feel even sicker to her stomach to think of him gone and her having to remain at home without him.

She couldn’t do it. She couldn’t imagine a day without him. Even the thought of it sent her straight back to her time in the coma when he’d felt literally a million miles away from her, and she’d thought that she’d never get to see him ever again. Her heart would start racing and she’d be filled with a panic that wouldn’t dissipate until she saw him again.

There was no way that she was going to admit aloud that she was worried that things weren’t right. That she wasn’t recovering as well as she’d expected to. She would just suck it up and get on with it. Even though she hadn't yet been strong enough to spend more than a few hours out of the apartment without having to return for a rest, she would force herself to do whatever it took to stay with him.

She’d take it a day at a time, and God willing, it’d only be for several months and then they’d come home together.

Justin searched her face with worried eyes and reached out to wrap her hand protectively in his. "I promise I'll take care of you," he assured her, sensing a little of her hesitations.

Libby stared back into his blue eyes and attempted another smile. She didn't doubt that he would take good care of her, and she felt a momentary pang of guilt for deceiving him.

If he’d known that she was worried, or wasn’t well enough to travel then he’d have been the first person to insist that she remain at home, however disappointing it would’ve been for the both of them. Libby knew that, and that was why she felt she needed to keep her concerns from Justin more than anyone. The only person whose stubborn nature she wouldn’t be able to fight was his.

"This will be good for us, Lib," Justin told her in a soft, reassuring voice. "Gettin' away for a bit, spendin' time together." Libby's face relaxed a little, and she shuffled as close to him as her seatbelt—and the armrest that separated them—would allow.

Finding herself restricted until the seat-belt warning was lifted, Libby settled for resting her head against Justin's firm shoulder. She let out a deep sigh and lifted her eyes to meet his once again. Justin smiled and laced his fingers through hers.

"Promise?" Libby asked softly.

"Promise," Justin replied, tilting his head to give her an affectionate kiss on the crown of her head. "Everything's gonna be fine as long as we're together."

Libby smiled. She couldn’t have said it better herself. She just hoped that he was right.

~~~~~*~~~~~

The plane touched down in Birmingham exactly nine hours later. Which Clare had been surprised to find hadn't been enough time to effectively plan her next attempt to escape.

Normally, had she known that she was due to take a nine-hour flight she would have had the foresight to charge her cell-phone battery before she got on the plane, but seeing as she'd had no idea about her 'adventure', her phone had consequently lost power less than an hour and forty minutes into the flight.

She'd hoped to be able to book another flight whilst still in the air, but this had been impossible with her phone now unusable, and Jamie, who never travelled without a full battery and a spare, just in case, had been unwilling to cooperate. Clare had immediately suspected that her friend had more to do with 'the plan' than she was letting on. There was no way that those pair of knuckleheads—Chris and Joey—could have organised this whole thing without some sensible help.

Consequently, upon landing, it had been easy for Clare to get pulled and pushed along with the rest of the group—first through arrivals, then baggage claim and finally out of the terminal itself, until she suddenly found herself standing in front of the large tour bus that had arrived in advance and was waiting to take the group to their first destination.

If Clare had anticipated having a chance to break away and run off into the crowd, then it wasn't going to happen. She hadn’t even had an opportunity to sneak into a cab.

She'd passed the taxi-rank not five minutes before, and she would have to almost re-enter the terminal to find herself alternate transport. It was unlikely that the rest of the group would fail to notice either of those options.

And so here she was, staring grimly up at the bus which she would—reluctantly— have to call home for the next however many months. It was a grim thought.

As it was only around 3:45 p.m. local time, Jamie had arranged for *NSYNC to do a few radio appearances in the city centre, much to the annoyance of Clare, Lisa—who had also come along on the tour—and Libby, who were all cranky from the flight and wanted to get to the hotel as soon as possible to settle in.

"Are you seriously telling me that eleven of us have to fit on a bus that isn't even big enough for the five of you?" Clare spat moodily at Lance as he and Jamie gave both her and Libby an impromptu tour of the bus' facilities.

It was pretty cramped—to say the least—but was nevertheless well-equipped with everything imaginable that could be fitted on an over-night sleeping coach.

"It's only while we're on the road," Jamie assured her. She, too, could remember a time when she'd had a tour of the bus, and Clare's reaction hadn't been too dissimilar to her own back then. "At night we stay in hotels."

"Whoopee!" Clare replied dryly as she met Jamie's eyes. She could tell that her friend was trying to be reassuring, but it was lost on Clare. None of this had been her idea—or her choice—and as time passed she was finding it harder and harder to accept the fact that this really was happening.

"You get used to it after a while," Sara said amiably as she jumped up onto her allocated bunk. It was the same one that she slept in during every tour, and over time it'd become like a second home to her—albeit a very compact and snug one.

"I don't want to get used to it!" Clare complained loudly as she struggled to pull her heavy hand luggage onto one of the free bunks that had been left empty for her and Libby. Clare's other luggage had been stored safely in the bus' large trunk—along with everyone else's—to be returned to her on arrival at the hotel. "I didn't want to come in the first place," Clare reminded Sara with a scowl.

Now that the cat was out of the bag, Clare was adamant that all of her friends must have somehow been involved in the plot to get her to come on tour, and she wasn't sure who she could trust.

"I've never heard so much complaining coming from one person!" Joey shouted down the bus' alley at Clare as he stood in front of the fridge, perusing its contents. He nudged the door shut with his foot and turned his head to meet her gaze, grinning when he saw the fury in her eyes.

"She's a woman," a male voice quipped with a chuckle. "What do you expect?"

Although she couldn't see him, Clare knew exactly who that voice belonged to, and at once her blood set to boiling. He was mocking her! How dare he even open his—

"Excuse me?" Lisa exclaimed loudly as she watched a wide grin cross Joey's face as he reached out to offer JC a high-five. At the sound of her voice, Joey turned cautiously to regard his girlfriend who had placed her hands on her hips and was staring at him, one eyebrow raised in consternation. It was no secret who wore the trousers in their relationship.

"Oh, come on. He didn't mean you, Lis," Joey said with a chuckle as he reached out a hand to try to placate her. Lisa stepped out of his reach and narrowed her eyes back at him.

"You guys better remember that this is a unisex bus now, so you better cut the crap!" she said with a huff as she dropped into one of the booth seats that were positioned near the front of the bus. Joey waited until her back was turned before turning back to JC and flashing him a grin.

~~~~~*~~~~~

Libby sat in the communal area of the bus, trying to keep a bright smile on her face even as her enthusiasm waned with each passing minute. This had definitely been a bad idea.

Since lift off she'd had a constant and painful dull ache in the side of her head where she'd had her accident, and although she was trying to put it down to her imagination, she was sure that it was getting progressively worse. Perhaps it had been too soon for her to fly? Or, maybe it was the fact that she was tired from the travelling? Either way, she was feeling pretty awful, and it was hard not to let it show. Normally she'd have had an afternoon nap by now… maybe it was just her body trying to adapt to the time difference? Either way, something wasn’t right.

She tried to work out how many Tylenol she’d already taken, and how soon she could take some more. She’d been told to avoid very strong medication as her coma might’ve affected the way her body could react to some medicines, but what she’d been given by the hospital just didn’t seem strong enough.

Surely it wasn’t good for her to be taking two to three painkillers every four hours? But what choice did she have? She couldn’t spend her life lying in a dark, silent room just to keep the pain at bay.

The loud noise from eleven people's conversation, the sound of the tyres on the tarmac and even the jarring of the bus made her head feel as though it was going to split in two. She glanced through narrowed eyes at the darkened sleeping area just a few feet away and let out a relieved sigh.

Just go and lie down, she told herself.

She glanced around her to see if anyone would notice her absence, and when she felt confident that the coast was clear, she slipped along the bus aisle towards ‘her’ bunk. If she could only get at least half an hour's sleep then maybe she would begin to feel better.

~~~~~*~~~~~

"Libby?" Clare whispered softly as she stood over Libby's sleeping form.

Having seen her friend sneak off to the bunks, Clare had waited around fifteen minutes before discreetly excusing herself and going to check on Libby. Clare had realised herself pretty early on that the only real place to get away for some quiet time was the sleeping area, but she’d been surprised by how quickly Libby had made her escape.

She hadn’t said anything, but Clare had been keeping a close eye on Libby from a distance. Clare knew her well enough to know just by looking at her face how she was feeling, and she could tell that there was something going on by the pinched expression on her friend's face.

She knew that bringing Libby on tour was a bad idea from the moment it’d first been mentioned in front of her, and if she’d had more time, she would’ve done anything to convince Libby—and the others—not to bring her along.

It was stupid. Reckless, even.

"Hmm...?" Libby asked sleepily as she opened her eyes a slither and peeped at Clare.

Clare lowered her voice and whispered. "Are you okay?"

Libby attempted a nod but the pain quickly made her regret the movement almost immediately. She dropped her head gently back onto the pillow and tried not to grimace. "I'm okay," she said weakly. "I just have a bit of a headache."

‘A bit of a headache’, Clare thought with a roll of her eyes. Judging by Libby’s face, it was probably the understatement of the year.

Clare regarded her friend for a moment before answering. "I hope Justin knows what he's doing,” she muttered. “I'm not thrilled about you being dragged into this, Libs. You should be at home, resting..."

"I'm okay." Libby repeated, although she knew that her words were untrue.

The word ‘mistake’ kept repeating through her mind over and over again, mocking her. Yes, she realised now that she should’ve stayed home, but it was too late. And there was no way that she was going to mention to anyone that she was regretting her decision. Justin would be furious—at himself, not her—and besides, what would she do? Travel back to the States alone? With Clare? She’d still be stuck at home for three months and he’d be half way across the world. The end result wouldn’t be any different, and at least on tour she’d get to see him every day.  

No, she'd just have to grin and bear the pain and hope that it'd eventually go away. Or if not, maybe she could attend a drop in centre somewhere for some stronger medication?

Clare pulled Libby's bedcover up higher over her shoulders and tucked it in and around her body snugly. She didn’t want to drone on and on when Libby was clearly suffering. She’d just make sure she kept a closer eye on her friend, and maybe try to align some of the others to her way of thinking. Maybe if there was a group of them, Libby would take more notice of Clare’s concerns.

"Can I get you anything?" she asked softly.

"Nah, thanks. I'll be fine in a bit," Libby assured her, offering Clare a grateful smile. "I'm just gonna have a little nap."

"Okay then, Libs,” Clare said, “Feel better."

~~~~~*~~~~~

~~~~~*~~~~~

“So what's first on the agenda?” Justin asked Jamie as the bus came to a stop. He’d made his way to the front of the bus, where Jamie was chatting amiably to the driver, and stood peering over her shoulder at the schedule she was holding in her hands.

“Radio interview,” she said.

Clare twisted around in her booth seat and looked out of the window at the hordes of people who had gathered outside the radio station building. Like back home in America, most of the fans were holding posters or merchandise that they were hoping the guys of *NSYNC would stop to sign. Some even held cameras in the hopes of getting a photo.

“Who has the pleasure of fighting their way through that crowd?” Clare asked, smirking as the sound of screaming intensified.

“That would be me,” Jamie said as she met Clare's eyes. Her face revealed how happy she was about this fact—not very.

“Yep, everyone else gets to wait here for their return,” Sara said as she, too, looked out at the bustling crowd. “Or die of boredom, whichever comes first."

Clare turned to Sara with a look of horror on her face. “Do you do this a lot?”

“No," Sara said, letting out a relieved sigh. "I'm not required for these parts. Usually I travel ahead and kill some time in the hotel gym. The guys only need me during rehearsals and sound checks."

"Oh, what joy life on the road is!”

"You said it, sis.”

~~~~~*~~~~~

“I am so bored!” Lisa complained loudly not thirty minutes after the members of *NSYNC and Jamie had left the bus.

The women had gathered in the small room at the back of the bus—including Libby, who had returned from her nap—and although they had a plethora of magazines and DVD's to choose from, none of them could make a decision on what to do.

Clare sat channel hopping, trying to find a Friends episode to watch as Libby flicked carelessly through one of the magazines.

“Find something to do then,” Libby told Lisa irritably. Although her nap had given her some relief from her headache she still had a dull, throbbing pain behind her eyes that certainly wasn't helping to lighten her mood. Lisa’s whining wasn’t helping either.

"Like what?” Lisa asked with a huff. “I packed everything into my suitcase thinking that it would be easier. I literally have nothing until we get to the hotel.”

"Do you wanna look through the channels?" Clare asked as she held the remote out to Lisa who shook her head in reply.

"Thanks, but no. I'll take your word for it that there's nothing on."

"There really isn't! I don't remember TV being this lame back in the day. Do you, Libs?"

Libby shrugged and kept her eyes fixed on her magazine.

"Gah!” Lisa exclaimed as she flopped down into the spare seat beside Clare. “How long do radio interviews go on for anyway?"

Sara shrugged her shoulders. "It depends,” she said. "Ten minutes, half an hour, an hour..."

“An hour!?” Lisa gawped, her eyes wide and her mouth partially open. “What the hell?”

~~~~~*~~~~~

An hour and a half later, the members of *NSYNC—accompanied by their security team and Jamie—made their way out of the radio station building to a deafening chorus of screams.  Hearing the cacophony outside, Clare, Sara, Libby and Lisa all left the TV room to head to the front of the bus where they could witness the fans reaction to the reappearance of *NSYNC.

"Wow!" Lisa said as her mouth fell open in surprise.

Libby watched the men make their way through the noisy crowd, stopping occasionally to accept offered gifts and to sign a few autographs over the metal barriers that’d been set up to keep them safe. "That's insane," she said after a moment.

"I didn't think they were that big over here yet," Sara said as she watched JC lean across one of the security guard's arms to have his photograph taken with a fan. By the time he'd given her a smile and walked away again she was a sobbing mess.

"I guess you were wrong.”

"Do you think they ever get used to that?" Lisa asked as the hydraulic door let out a hiss of air before opening and allowing Jamie to enter the bus. Taking in the shocked expressions on their faces as she boarded the bus Jamie gave a wry smile and sniggered.

"Welcome to touring ladies!"

~~~~~*~~~~~

Three hours and two stops later, the tour bus pulled up behind the hotel where the group had reservations. Just like at all the other stops the fans seemed to know exactly where the group were going to be, and so a large crowd had gathered at the front entrance of the building. Fortunately, the driver took a short detour around to the back of the hotel so that the group could slip in relatively unnoticed.

Thanks to Jamie check-in was a pretty stream–less process, and in less than ten-minutes the group were settling into their rooms. She’d managed to book out a whole floor of the hotel so it was easy for the security team to make sure that the group were left alone to unpack without being bothered by anyone.

Upon entering her and Libby's room, Clare dropped her suitcase onto the floor besides one of the twin beds and threw herself right into the middle of the nearest bed, bouncing up and down on the mattress springs as they absorbed her weight.

"Finally!" she said as she closed her eyes and let out a relieved sigh. "I've been waiting all day for this moment!" She turned her head and buried her face deep into the fluffy pillow, inhaling the clean scent of freshly laundered sheets.

Hearing Libby's arrival not a moment later, Clare turned her head to watch her friend collapse onto her own bed. Libby looked just as relieved as her to finally be at the hotel.

"It feels weird to be back," Libby said after a moment, her voice muffled slightly by her pillow as she met Clare's eyes. "It feels like it’s been such a long time, don't you think?"

"Yeah, I suppose it does."

“So much has happened.”

"Yeah."

"Do you ever regret it?”

"Huh?"

"I mean, if you could do it all over would you still move to the States?"

Clare sucked in a breath. It was a pretty intense question for her tired brain to comprehend. She thought about it for a moment, running her mind over the events of the past few months. Although she’d gone through hell and back there was no part of her that regretted her choice to move to America. She wouldn’t swap her friends, her apartment or her lifestyle for anything.

"I wouldn't move back here for all the money in the world," she replied honestly. "Would you?"

Libby hesitated, and then an unstoppable grin crossed her face. Clare knew that smirk and the reasons behind it. Justin.  

"Sometimes I miss things," Libby admitted quietly. “I miss having roast beef on a Sunday, and hanging around the park with my brothers. I miss being able to see my mum every day, and not being able to beg my dad for money when I’m short.” She chuckled at the memory. “I’m sad that I’ve missed so many Christmases and birthdays, too. But do I regret moving?” She hesitated as though she needed a moment to think about it. “Definitely not. Our life in the States is so amazing and I could never give up all that we have.”

"We have?" Clare chuckled.

Libby smirked and blushed slightly. "I can't believe I've gotten everything I've ever wanted," she said. "Not the way I would have wanted of course, but still..."

"You deserve to be happy, Libs.”

Libby looked into Clare’s smiling face and swallowed hard. She didn’t doubt that Clare meant every word, but she couldn’t help but feel… guilty. No matter how hard Clare tried she couldn’t hide the sadness that lingered in her eyes. 

"So do you, Clare. When's your turn?"

Clare let out a huff and flipped over onto her back until she was staring up at the ceiling. "I guess we just have to wait and see."

~~~~~*~~~~~

Chris power–walked into the bedroom he was to share with Joey and made a bee-line for the bed closest to the window. Hot on his trail Joey ran up behind him and forcefully threw his suitcase past Chris’s head and onto the very same bed.

They both landed in the middle of the bed at exactly the same time causing the mattress springs to squeak in alarm.

"Mine!" Both men shouted loudly simultaneously before narrowing their eyes at each other.

"This is my bed, Fatone! I got first dibs!" Chris said as he jumped to his feet and tossed Joey's case onto the floor.

"No, you did not!" Joey shouted back, righting his case and getting straight in Chris' face.

"Did too!"

"Did not!"

"Did too!"

Having heard the argument through the thin walls of the room next door, Justin and JC appeared in the doorway with visible scowls on their faces.

"You have got to stop this," JC told Chris irritably as he pulled Joey out of the older man's face. Both Chris and Joey continued to glower at each other as the distance between them increased.  

"You do this every time you guys room together," Justin said as he assisted JC in breaking the two men apart. He shoved Chris roughly in the chest and raised an eyebrow as Chris directed his scowl at him. "It's lame,” he said as he jokingly scowled back.

"We do not!" Chris retaliated as he shoved Justin in a way that looked much more forceful than it really was.

"Do too!"

"Do not!"

"Do too!"

"Oh, God!" JC groaned as he rolled his eyes skyward and turned to Joey, who was watching Chris and Justin with an amused smirk on his face. Sensing JC's eyes on his face, Joey turned his head and shrugged innocently.

"This is all your fault, man."

~~~~~*~~~~~

"You know what I miss the most about living here?" Libby asked Clare after a minute or two of staring up at the ceiling.

"The men?"

"Yeah, 'cause there was so much choice.”

"The clubs?"

"Yeah, 'cause I was old enough to get into them."

"Okay, I give up. What do you miss most about living here?" Clare asked as she abruptly stood and made her way over to where she’d left her suitcase. She was starting to fall asleep just lying still and she needed to get up and move. She unzipped the front pocket on her case as she waited for Libby’s answer.

"The chip shops," Libby told her with a snigger.

Clare glanced over her shoulder and laughed. "Of all the things you could choose you chose that?"

"Why? What's wrong with that?"

"I don't know, I guess I just thought you were going to say your family, or something," Clare giggled.

Silence filled the room for a few minutes as Clare sorted through her case and Libby contemplated asking the question that’d been playing on her mind all day. Eventually she gave in to the nagging voice in her head that told her to just go for it.

“How are you?”

Clare paused her sorting and glanced over at Libby quickly. Her eyes flicked around the room as though she were searching for a reason behind the unexpected question. “Uh, yeah. Why?”

“It’s just… you didn’t seem to handle what happened this morning very well. I was worried that you’d be mad at me.”

Clare let out a sigh. “I take it you’d known for a while.”

Libby shook her head. “Not really, no. J told me that night on the beach, but I was sworn to secrecy like everyone else.”

“Everyone else?”

“Lis, Jamie, Sara…”

“Oh, God. Everyone knew?”

Libby looked sheepish. “Well, it was kinda necessary to be able to make all the preparations. Believe me, I wanted to tell you.”

Clare let out a huff but flashed her a wry smile. “I guess it’s fair enough considering I’ve kept things from you, too.”

Libby met her eyes, and they shared a smile.

“What are you gonna do about work?” Libby asked as concern crossed her face. It was the first time she’d considered what going on tour would do to Clare’s attempts to find a new job. Like Clare, Libby was still in the dark about Johnny having dismissed Clare’s letter of resignation. They had no idea that Clare was still employed by RCA and that her wages were still being paid into her bank account.

“Well, to be honest I don’t know. I’m kinda taking things an hour at a time right now. I’m still thinking about getting myself a flight back home ASAP.”

Libby nodded and dropped her eyes to the plain cotton bed linen. Was it wrong for her to hope that she would stay? Was that being selfish? Things would be so much easier for her if Clare stayed, but being forced to spend time with JC was likely her worst nightmare. She didn’t blame her for wanting out.

“You could talk to Jamie about it?” she suggested.

“Nah,” Clare said, shaking her head as she turned back to her case. “The more people who know the more likely it is that the guys will find out. Now I have internet access again I can start looking for some cheap flights.” She fiddled around in her case before dragging out a change of clothes and her toiletries bag. Libby was relieved to see that she hadn’t reached straight for the computer.

“But anyway, how are you now?” Clare asked. “Are you feeling any better?”

Libby attempted a bright smile and shrugged. “I’m fine now,” she said. “Tylenol is pretty strong. It usually does the job.”

Clare eyed her suspiciously. “Really? You seemed pretty sick earlier.”

Libby shrugged again. “I was just tired. It was a long flight.”

“Hmmm,” Clare mumbled as Libby dropped her gaze. “As long as that’s all it was.”

~~~~~*~~~~~

Chris woke up unusually early the next morning. After showering, dressing and checking the voicemail on his cell phone he made his way over to Justin and JC's room for some company.

"Are you two up?" he asked as he gently pushed the door open and peered inside.

"Mmm–hmm..." Justin mumbled, his tongue sticking out of his mouth as he sat on his bed beside by JC. Both of them were staring ahead at the TV screen as they battled each other at a game of NFL Extreme. It was clear to Chris by the dishevelled state of their clothes and hair that they’d been at it for hours.

"You guys had breakfast?" Chris asked as he watched the TV screen, momentarily getting caught up in the action himself.

"Nope," Justin muttered, hissing as he made a fatal mistake that gave JC the advantage. JC chuckled darkly and nudged Justin’s shoulder with his fist.

"Are you gonna get some breakfast?" Chris asked.

"Eventually," JC answered after a moment.

"’Cause they stop serving breakfast in an hour…" Chris said as he glanced at his wrist watch. Or make that less than an hour…

"What?" JC and Justin said at the same time, both their heads turning to face Chris simultaneously. Chris sniggered at the matching expressions of surprise on their faces.

"But I'm hungry," Justin whined as he dropped his controller onto the bed.

"Well come and eat then!"

~~~~~*~~~~~

"Good morning my beautiful!" Justin said cheerfully as Libby opened her door to him not ten minutes later. Chris and JC had gone straight down to the restaurant to get breakfast, but Justin had been adamant that he was going to check on Libby first. He hadn’t expected her to necessarily want to get anything to eat—she still didn’t have much of an appetite—but he thought he’d ask just in case.

Libby smiled and gestured him inside with her hand. "I'm just getting ready to go down for breakfast," she told him as she disappeared off to the bathroom. "I won't be long."

Justin grinned. “No rush,” he said as he made his way over to her bed and threw himself down before settling into a comfortable position to wait. He folded his arms behind his head and leaned back against the bedpost so he could watch her through the open door as she brushed her hair in front of the mirror.

"Ugh!" Libby groaned aloud after a couple of minutes as she put down the brush and peered closely at herself in the mirror.

"What's up?"

"This," Libby said, sticking her head through the doorway and pointing at the bald patch on the side of her head where the surgical team had shaved away her hair for surgery. It wasn't immediately obvious from a distance, but it was large enough that Libby knew that people could see it when they were up close. She hated the fact that it was in an area that was practically impossible for her to hide, and she felt embarrassed at the thought of people looking at her funny because of it.

"It looks awful and I hate it," she said, pouting at Justin before turning her attention back to her reflection in the mirror. She continued to try to rearrange her hair so that the patch didn't show but eventually let out a huff and dropped her hands noisily at her side.

Silently getting to his feet, Justin joined her in the bathroom and stood behind her until she noticed his reflection in the mirror. Libby gave him a weak smile and regarded him with sad eyes.  

Justin let out a small chuckle and pulled her backwards, wrapping his arms snugly around her waist as he did so. He crouched forward until his cheek was resting against hers and Libby could feel the prickle of his unshaved stubble against her skin.

Instinctively she ran her hands down his arms and leaned back against his chest before letting out a little sigh.

"Look at them," Justin said softly as he looked at their reflection in the mirror. A satisfied smile crossed his face as his blue eyes twinkled at her. Libby tilted her head slightly and considered the way they looked together. She had to admit they were a cute couple.

"I think he loves her anyway," Justin said in a whisper. He grinned into the mirror with such a goofy expression that Libby couldn't help but laugh. He had such a natural way of making her smile.

"Even with a bald patch?" she asked as she felt him tighten his arms around her.

"Even with a bald patch," he said.

"And a huge scar on her throat?" Libby asked as she self-consciously lifted a hand up to cover the two inch scar that was still healing from her tracheostomy. She was hyper aware of how strange it looked, and wished that the skin wasn’t still so red. She was tempted to try covering it up with makeup, but the one time she’d mentioned it to Justin he’d made her promise not to. She still didn’t know why. 

Justin glanced at her throat and gently peeled her fingers away as he leaned forward to replace them with his lips. As his tongue flicked out to lick her scar, Libby felt a spark of flame burn its way down her spine, and she instinctively sucked in a breath.

Justin pulled away and grinned at her in the mirror. "Even with the scar.”

Libby looked ahead at his reflection in the mirror and tilted her head slightly to the side. What was it about him that seemed to make her feel better about everything? Even things she wasn’t convinced she was happier about? He just seemed to magic her problems away, or at least make her feel confident enough to brush them aside herself. Whatever it was, she wished that she could bottle it and sell it to the world. The entire human population could benefit from being around Justin’s humble, caring, positive personality. 

“The real problem is…” he said as he straightened slightly and lifted a hand to his hair—which had grown quite a lot in the last few months. It was now showing its visible curl, which Justin hated. “What are we going to do about this hair?” He ran a hand over his scalp and sneered at his reflection.

It was Libby’s turn to smile. She giggled and spun around in his arms before leaning forward onto her tiptoes so that she could inspect his hair closely. She pulled his hand away from his curls and kept it held in hers.

Contemplating his question, Libby sucked her bottom lip into her mouth and chewed down on it as a thoughtful expression crossed her face.

"Hmm..."

"Shave it all off?" Justin suggested hopefully.

"Nah, I think you should grow it out."

"Grow it?" he repeated in a strangled voice. "But it's so curly. It'll look a mess."

Libby shook her head slowly and rolled her eyes, playfully exasperated. “J, there’s nothing wrong with your hair. Curls are sexy.”

“Sexy?” he repeated, then snorted.

“Yes, sexy. You should grow it out. Besides, you can’t keep dying it all the time. I’ll fall out…”

“Yeah, but longer?”

"Why not? I think it’d look nice longer.”

Libby laughed when his eyes widened in surprise.

"Really?" He glanced over at his reflection again and tried to contemplate himself with longer hair. Only as a child had he had relatively long hair, but that had been his mother’s decision not his. The idea baffled him, but if Libby thought that it’d look nicer… sexy even, then maybe he should give it a try?

"Yeah, I think so."

"Hmm… then maybe I should."

~~~~~*~~~~

Joey sat in his hotel room eating the breakfast he'd ordered from room service as he watched the TV absent-mindedly. He hadn't been bothered to head down to where the breakfast was being served in the hotel restaurant, and had instead decided to make use of the hotel's facilities from the comfort of his own room.

His body clock was still messed up from the time difference—despite his almost eight hour sleep—and he'd woken feeling especially groggy and irritable. He knew that he wouldn't be much company for his friends in his current mood, and so he'd decided to play it safe and eat alone.

"Joe?" Joey heard Lisa call through his hotel room door, and he quickly swallowed the mouthful of coffee he had in his mouth before getting up off of the bed to open the door to her.

"Mornin' sweetie," Lisa told him cheerfully as she reached up for a quick kiss. She had an armful of clothes and one of the hotel's bath towels in her arms, and she had balanced her toiletries bag on top of the pile having run out of hands to hold it with. "Can I use your shower? Sara's taking ages." She entered the room and let the door shut by itself behind her.

Joey returned to his makeshift picnic area on the bed and nodded as he shoved half a slice of buttered toast into his mouth before chewing, swallowing and answering her. "Sure, Chris' gone down for breakfast or somethin', so it’s free."

"Thanks, honey," Lisa said with a smile as she entered the bathroom, turned on the light and closed the door.

Joey turned back to the TV and continued to eat his breakfast. It was a while before he realised that today was the first day that Lisa hadn’t spent the first part of the morning in the bathroom being sick.

~~~~~*~~~~~

"Today they have an interview at eleven, a photo shoot and interview with Smash Hits magazine at noon, and then they're all yours for the rehearsal," Jamie told Sara as she read the day's schedule aloud to the group as they headed off to their first destination of the day.

The members of *NSYNC half listened as they found ways to amuse themselves during the journey. The girls—Libby, Lisa and Clare—had gathered in the booth to chat, leaving Sara and Jamie to discuss work.

"Smash Hits magazine?" Libby said as she glanced at Clare and chuckled. "Do you remember that, Clare? We used to combine our pocket money at the end of the week to buy a copy?"

Clare laughed at the memory. "I do remember. We used to fight over who got to keep the pull-out posters."

"Which you always won," Libby said in a slightly resentful tone.

“I was older,” Clare said. “Plus I used more of my pocket money than you."

"Only because you got more. ‘Sides, you only took the posters to spite me. We never liked the same bands."

"Thank God,” Clare chuckled. “Oh! Except for Take That."

Libby glanced off into the distance wistfully as she remembered back to her teenage years and her obsessive love for Robbie Williams. "Ah, Robbie!" she sighed dramatically before giggling at herself.

"I'm right here!" Justin huffed, lowering the bottle of soda he was drinking from and raising a questioning eyebrow at his girlfriend who’d spun around in her seat at the sound of his voice. She’d completely forgotten that he was within earshot and her blush reached all the way to the top of her ears.

“Sorry, baby.”

“Somewhere someone is having this kind of conversation about you,” Clare said as Libby hopped up from her seat and half skipped over to where Justin was leaning against the kitchen counters. He maintained the pouty expression on his face until Libby giggled and placed a kiss on his cheek.

“Love you,” she said causing Justin to smirk.

“But I’m no Robbie Williams, right?”

Libby sniggered. “What can I say? I’m a sucker for the bad guys.”

Justin raised his eyebrows. “I’m not a bad guy?”

“No,” Clare snorted. “You are not a bad guy.”

"Whatever,” Justin huffed as he pulled Libby into his arms and gave her a proper kiss.

"So what exactly do you guys have to do to prepare for a photo shoot and interview?" Lisa asked Joey as he passed by the booth to join Justin and Libby in the kitchen area.

"You mean besides looking cute?" he asked her with a crooked smile, and the girls broke out into laughter as he began to run through a practice of his 'cutest' poses.

"Obviously besides that," Clare chuckled.

"They usually ask the same stupid questions as the radio stations," Chris added from where he sat at the front of the bus. "What our favourite colours are."

"Which was the first concert we went to," Joey said with a smirk at Chris.

"What we eat for breakfast," Justin said after swallowing another mouthful of soda. Libby leaned into his body and wrapped an arm around his waist as she watched him down his drink.

"Cap'n Crunch," she said without hesitation, receiving a high five for her correct answer.

"Exactly," Justin said with a laugh.

"So pretty boring stuff," Lisa said as she considered their answers.

"Pretty much."

"Can't you mix it up a bit?" she asked JC as he came to sit on the spare couch, spreading his legs out in front of him as he stretched.

"What do you mean?" he asked her.

"I dunno, make up some new answers? Or just make it all up. Who’d know?"

"Believe me, they'd know," Libby replied. "One time I accidentally mixed up the biography information on the website and I got like a million emails telling me what an idiot I was. It was only online for a matter of minutes but the fans noticed. I swear that when it comes to these guys they have photographic memories."

"Scary," Chris commented with a shudder.

"Imagine if they knew the truth about you," Lisa giggled as she glanced from Chris to Joey and back again. "They'd be horrified."

"They sure would," Clare said darkly as she glowered across the aisle at JC.

The carefree laughter in the bus died abruptly and JC turned his head to meet Clare’s eyes before rolling his own skyward, antagonising her further and causing her heckles to rise.

"Excuse me," she said abruptly to Lisa who was sitting between her and the way out of the booth. Lisa silently shuffled along to let Clare past. Without saying another word, Clare turned and stomped towards the sleeping area. She needed to be as far away from JC as the cramped space would allow.

"Whoops," Joey mumbled sheepishly as soon as Clare was out of earshot.

JC shrugged and folded his arms across his chest as he glared out of the window at the cars passing by on the other side of the road.

"Have you spoken to her yet?" Chris asked causing JC to scowl back at him in frustration.

"You know the answer to that."

"Keep trying, man. She's got to give in eventually."

"You reckon?"

"No, but isn't that what people always say?" Chris glanced around at the others for agreement but everyone avoided meeting his eyes. "Right, guys?"

I remember way back way back when / I said I never wanna see your face again / 'Cause you were loving yes you're loving somebody else / And I knew oh yes I knew I couldn't control myself / And now they bring you back into my life again / And so I put on a face just like your friends / But I think you know / Oh yes you know what's going on / 'Cause the feelings in me, oh yes, in me are burning strong

But I will never be your stepping stone / Take it all or leave me alone / I will never be your stepping stone / I'm standing upright on my own

~~~~~*~~~~~

Once the men had cleared off the bus to go their first interview, Lisa cornered Clare near the sleeping area. She’d been talked into it—of course—but when it’d come down to it, she hadn’t really needed that much persuading.

Like everyone else, Lisa was trying not to let the drama between JC and Clare affect her. But now that everyone was living on top of each other, it was nearly impossible not to be bothered by the tense, hostile environment that the pair created when they were around each other. Lisa had come on tour to spend time with her boyfriend and hopefully take her mind off feeling unwell, but dealing with JC and Clare drama wasn’t helping with either of those things.

It didn’t help that Joey kept nagging her to go talk to Clare to try to voice JC’s side of the situation. Everyone was trying to tell Clare discreetly that she really should let JC explain, but she still wasn’t having any of it. No one felt it was their place to explain that JC wasn’t engaged or expecting a baby—they all felt that the news should come from him—but since Clare was so pig–headed and moody, it seemed that she might never hear the news.

Naturally, Joey had assumed that Lisa should be the next person to attempt to get through to Clare. He seemed to think that she was the most sensitive and understanding of all the women, which suggested to Lisa that he was endearingly biased in her favour. She wasn’t particularly either of those things.

Out of all the women, Lisa was closest to Libby, and although she hung out with Clare socially, the pair weren’t that close. Lisa wasn’t sure how she was supposed to bring up such a delicate subject with Clare out of the blue, but she knew that she’d never hear the end of it from Joey if she didn’t try. Now was her chance.

“What?” Clare asked Lisa as the latter blocked the thin hallway and stood with her arms folded across her chest. The frown across Lisa’s brow told Clare that something was up.

“We need to talk,” Lisa said, maintaining the disapproving frown on her face. She hadn’t intended to open the subject so abruptly and sternly, but now that she’d started she figured that she might as well carry on.

Clare’s eyes automatically flicked to the front of the bus where Libby and Sara were playing a game of cards to help them pass the time until the men returned.

“Okay…”

“It’s about JC.”

“I figured,” Clare said as she unconsciously copied Lisa’s posture. She didn’t want to jump to conclusions but she was determined not to be bullied into anything. She that knew her friends were getting frustrated with her stubborn refusal to listen to JC, but they weren’t living her life, she was, and none of them understood the pain he’d put her through. She knew that JC was a lot easier to get along with than she was—she was stubborn, proud and judgemental—but it hurt her that already her friends were transferring their sympathies to JC. “What about him?”

Lisa let out a deep sigh and said, more gently, “You really need to listen to him, Clare.”

Clare let out a snort and rolled her eyes. “Er, no. I really don’t.”

“Yes, you do. Has it occurred to you that maybe you are making a bigger deal of this than you really should? Has it occurred to you that maybe JC is sorry and wants to make amends for what happened?”

Again Clare snorted, but she felt something inside of her twinge at the idea. Hadn’t she considered that? Well… not really. But what difference would it make if he wanted to say sorry? It didn’t change anything. Of course he wanted to be friends with her again, but that was the whole point; he clearly thought that they could just go back to the way things were, and that she, Alyson and the baby could all be besties for life. As if.

“Well…”

“I really think you should think about it. I don’t think you realise what you’re putting us through with this massive rift.”

“Lisa, I—”

“I know that you were hurt by what happened. I understand that, I really do. But do you really want to carry on like this forever?” Clare opened her mouth to protest, but Lisa quickly interrupted. “I mean, even if you did find another job and left, I’m sure your intention isn’t to never see any of us again, right?”

“Of course not,” Clare spluttered.

“So what? You think you can continue holding this grudge against JC forever? You don’t think that sooner or later it’s going to affect other people? Libby for example?”

Clare frowned. “Why would it affect Libby?”

“It’s affecting Libby! Her boyfriend is practically JC’s closest friend in the group. You don’t think that’s going to cause Libby problems at some point?”

Clare glanced over Lisa’s shoulder at Libby who was grinning victoriously at Sara, having clearly achieved some advantage over her friend at their game. At the returning expression on Sara’s face, Libby threw her head back and laughed. Of course she didn’t want Libby to be affected by what had happened. That’s why she’d kept it from her for as long as she had.

“And what about Jamie and Chris? Me and Joey? You don’t think we haven’t been put in an awkward position by what’s happened? They’re like brothers, Clare. Thank God our relationships are as strong as they are, ‘cause this is the kinda thing couples break up over. I mean, Jamie and Chris have really only just got together, and I know they’ve had rows about this.”

Clare felt some of the fire within her extinguish at the thought. The last thing she wanted was for her friends to be put in a difficult situation because of her. Especially if it meant that it was affecting their relationships. But why couldn’t they see that it was all JC’s fault, not hers? When had she become the bad guy?

“I know it’s not all you, Clare. I know JC has as much responsibility to sort this out as you do, but he’s trying. You’re just being stubborn and won’t listen. I mean, what harm could it do to hear him out? Really? Would it be the end of the world?”

What was she supposed to say, Clare wondered. Yes, it really would? But then Lisa would probably thump her. Or let herself admit that maybe she could hear him out? But then she’d have to admit that she may have taken things a little too far. Either way, she’d end up with egg on her face.

“I’m sorry that I’ve had to be blunt about this Clare,” Lisa said. “I just know that someone has to say something before this carries on and none of us are friends any more. I don’t mean to put you in an awkward spot, but sooner or later you have to at least listen to what he has to say. Especially now. I mean, you can’t keep storming around and trying to avoid him.”

Clare’s heckles rose and her stubborn streak returned. Storming around? If anyone was known for throwing their weight around when they were in a bad mood it was Lisa, not her. Lisa was a fiery red–head, after all. Who was she to judge? Sure, she may have thrown the odd tantrum and slammed the odd door… but was she really to blame for that? Had they already forgotten that she’d been kidnapped? If she was such a nightmare to be around then why had they all conspired to bring her along on the tour?

“I guess I could think about it,” she muttered, refusing to meet Lisa’s eyes.

“Don’t think,” Lisa said, “just do it. And if you can’t do it for you or him, do it for all of us.”

~~~~~*~~~~~

*Part 2 follows*

~~~~~*~~~~~

"Movie night!" Lisa shouted loudly from her room in the hopes that the others would hear and she wouldn't have to leave her comfortable spot on the bed to go to round them all up.

As the group had reserved the entire hotel floor for security reasons, they’d all agreed to leave their doors open so that they could come and go into each other’s rooms as they pleased. It meant organising a movie night was much easier than having to play Chinese whispers between rooms.

"What's the movie?" Libby shouted back from the room she was sharing with Clare. She wanted to hear the movie choice before she decided whether to join Lisa or stay in her room. Late in the evening was one of the worst times for her—headache wise—and she wasn’t sure whether or not she should just call it quits on today and have an early night.

Clare, who was sitting cross–legged on her bed typing away at her laptop computer, seemed so absorbed in her work that she hadn’t reacted to Lisa’s suggestion at all. Now that she’d resigned herself to the fact that she wouldn’t be able to book a flight home any time soon—not without finding several hundred dollars first—she’d decided to bite the bullet and contact her prospective new employers to apologise for her absence and try to reschedule her interviews. 

Clare wasn’t expecting any of them to be understanding or willing to agree to her request, but she felt that she had to do the right thing and at least try. The only peace of mind she had was knowing that while she was on tour her food and accommodation would all be paid for, and that she was six months ahead in her rental payments for her apartment back home. As long as she found herself a job within a few weeks of returning from tour her and Libby should be okay.

Chris and Joey may have felt that they’d won her over, but they’d only won the battle and not the war. Although it had unsettled her to discover that they had an accomplice in Lisa. Since their discussion that morning Lisa’s words had been running through her mind constantly, and although she hated to admit it she could feel her resolve weakening.

Maybe if she listened to whatever it was that JC had to say then they’d all get off her back. She doubted that it would change anything—as JC had seemed so convinced that it would—but at least it would mean she wouldn’t be the bad guy anymore.

"’She's All That’, or ‘Armageddon’?" Lisa shouted back loudly, and Libby turned to Clare to gauge her reaction to the question. Clare’s head didn’t lift from the laptop screen.

“Clare?” Libby said after a moment of waiting for Clare to acknowledge her.

"Hmm?" Clare replied distractedly as her fingers flew nimbly over the keyboard keys.

"The movie,” Libby explained. “Are you coming?"

Clare let the question hang in the air as she finished typing the last few words of her email. She just had to finish the last sentence and then she could press send.

"Clare!" Libby snapped at her, reaching across to pull on her Clare’s arm to drag her away from the computer. "Come on, we're having a movie night next door."

"Just one sec…" Clare said as she slipped her arm out of Libby's grasp and resumed her typing at a million miles an hour. Libby watched for a moment and then let out a frustrated huff.

“Fine,” she said as she turned on her heels and headed out of the room to join Sara and Lisa next door. “Just don’t forget that no one loves a workaholic!” she called over her shoulder.

Having overheard her, Chris chuckled from where he sat on the floor, his arms wrapped tightly around Jamie as she sat between his legs. “I do!” he said loudly causing Jamie to glance over her shoulder to scowl at him. Chris immediately burst out laughing at the sour expression on her face. "What? What did I say?"

Justin appeared in the doorway not long after and leaned casually against the doorframe as his group of friends made themselves comfortable in various locations around the room. “What’s the movie?” he asked through a stifled yawn.

He and JC were still in the middle of their incomplete game of NFL Extreme, and Justin wasn’t sure whether he’d rather watch a movie or continue playing. After all this was the last free night he had to beat JC before the group’s opening night of the tour. Although the men had been enjoying hanging out with their friends and girlfriends, they were excited to get back to doing what they loved best—performing.

"Armageddon, I think," Jamie replied as she glanced between her friend's faces to gauge their reactions. There was a general reply of agreement, and so Lisa removed the VHS cassette from its case and inserted it into the slot on the TV.

"Armageddon?" Justin groaned dramatically as he made his way over to where Libby was sprawled across Sara's bed. Everyone else was seated on the floor around the television, most of them leaning their backs against the bedframes for support—especially Chris, who was already complaining about how uncomfortable he was.

When Libby saw Justin approach she shuffled over to make space for him on the bed beside her and grinned.

"Armageddon's so boring," Justin complained as he lay back against Sara's pillows and pulled Libby over to him with one arm so that she was lying at his side, her head resting against his chest.

"It's not boring," Libby corrected him with a frown. "It's romantic." She reached up and planted a kiss on his brow.

Both Joey and Justin gave out snorts of amusement, to which Joey received a pointed look from Lisa which silenced him straight away.

"What's so romantic about the earth being struck by an asteroid?" Justin asked as the opening credits began to roll.

"What’s so romantic about a runaway bus?" Libby said with a smirk. She hadn't forgotten their movie night several months back when they'd watched his favourite film, Speed, and she knew that he hadn't either. Justin gave her a cocky grin before pulling her tighter to his chest.

"It’s not supposed to be romantic,” he said. “It’s an action movie, but the leading lady happens to be hot.”

"So is Liv Tyler," Chris said, having overheard their conversation. He glanced over his shoulder at Justin, his brown furrowing in thought. He could’ve sworn they’d seen Armageddon together one time at the cinema. “You've seen her in this, 'avent you?"

Justin dismissed him with a shrug of his shoulders before turning back to Libby, who had suddenly gone quiet. She was pretending not to be jealous but failing miserably. Seeing the look on her face, Justin grinned and leaned in close, tickling her cheek with his nose.

"Somethin' wrong?" he asked in a whisper as the movie began to play. He was trying his best not to laugh at the pouty expression on her face, but it wasn’t easy. Libby was trying so hard not to act jealous that it was hilarious. He knew her a lot better than she gave him credit for.  

"No," Libby replied shortly, keeping her eyes on the screen and avoiding looking at him at all costs. The minute she caught his eye she knew that she was going to laugh, and she really didn’t want to do that.

"Oh, you just looked pissed off, that's all," Justin chuckled.

“No.” Libby accidentally caught sight of his smirk in her peripheral vision and found herself unable to fight the grin that started at the corner of her lips and quickly spread across her whole mouth. Seeing her smile, Justin burst out laughing and was promptly shushed by everyone else in the room.

“Ah, it’s okay, Baldie,” he said in a whisper as Libby turned to meet his eyes, shaking her head at the way he was finding her jealously so amusing. “You’re pretty hot too.”

At the mention of the word ‘Baldie’ Libby let out a gasp of indignation and reached out to punch him hard on the shoulder. Justin quickly raised his free arm in defence, trying to block the inevitable second blow as he burst out into noisy laughter at Libby’s expense.

“Shhh!” Lisa hissed at him.

"Too soon?" Justin asked through snorts of laughter as he trapped Libby’s balled up fist in his palm.

"Way too soon!" Libby said, before settling back down and placing her head back on his chest. She didn’t have the energy to punish him any further, but next time he used the term ‘Baldie’ she’d let him have it.

For forty minutes there was relative silence in the room as the group settled down to watch the movie. Not too long after, Clare appeared in the doorway. She’d finished her emails and had decided to join the group for the remainder of the evening—even though she’d missed out on a large part of the movie.

Lance had switched off the overhead lights in the room and so it took a few minutes for Clare’s eyes to adjust to the darkness. She quickly spotted a free space on Lisa's bed where she could watch the film without blocking anyone's view. Carefully making her way over to the bed, Clare kept her eyes fixed on the floor so that she didn't step on anyone's outstretched hands or trip over any legs.

As she reached her destination, Clare slipped off her trainers and climbed onto the bed at exactly the same moment that JC had had the idea to do the same.

He’d been eyeing the spot for a while as he'd been struggling to get comfortable on the carpeted floor, and had decided to cut his losses and find somewhere softer to continue watching the movie from. Sara's bed had seemed the perfect place.

"Get off!" Clare shouted as he accidentally placed his hand on her knee as he tried to right himself. Clare glowered as her cheeks flushed an angry red.

"Shhh!" Chris hissed sharply as he glanced over his shoulder at the pair. He smirked when he realised what had happened. No doubt it had been an accident, but he couldn’t help but smirk at the expressions on JC and Clare’s faces. No matter how much they tried to avoid each other, fate kept throwing them together.

"I’m sorry!" JC said bashfully as he quickly removed his hand from Clare’s knee and climbed to a seated position. A snigger made its way out of his mouth, and before long he was grinning at Clare, hoping that she, too, would see the funny side.

She didn’t.

JC’s face hardened and he frowned. “Don’t look at me like that,” he snapped. “It was an accident.” He was fed up with the snooty, sneering scowl on her face and wondered where his happy, easy–go–lucky friend had gone. Was she still in there somewhere? Behind the scowls and the pouts and all the eye–rolling?

“Yeah, right!” Clare said, the sarcasm dripping off her tongue. She didn’t believe him in the slightest. "Are you going to move?" She looked pointedly at the space on the carpet beside Chris and Jamie, hoping that would be enough of a hint to get him to move.

Instead JC began to make himself comfortable on the bed, ignoring the scowling expression on her face. No, he wasn’t going to move. He had just as much right to be there as Clare, and since she hadn’t been behaving like a lady, he wasn’t going to treat her like one. Equal rights, and all that.

“No, I’m not,” he said simply as he laid on his stomach, supporting his head in his hands, his elbows pressing into the bedcover. Once he was still he realised that he’d actually chosen one of the most uncomfortable positions to be in, but he was not going to move now. He glanced over his shoulder, one eyebrow raised in a question as he waited to see how she would respond.

Clare narrowed her eyes and considered her next move.

Part of her wanted to use brute force and push him off the end of the bed—hopefully breaking a few bones in the process—but she knew that was immature, not to mention improbable. At the same time, the thought of being so close to him had its appeal too. But no, she wasn’t going to think about that. She couldn’t think about that…

As much as she needed to—wanted to—hate him with all of her strength, Clare realised that being around him again had weakened her resolve. She’d found herself listening out for his voice in a crowd, paying particular attention when he spoke or laughed. Her eyes seemed to instinctively look for him in a room, and much to her disgust her stomach once again somersaulted when he looked into her eyes.

It made her angry that her body was being such a traitor to her emotions—not to mention her hormones—and she wished that she could magic away her feelings; for no other reason than to save herself the pain that she would inevitably feel if she allowed her heart to rule her head once again.

He was after all still engaged and expecting a baby with another woman. Although Clare had noticed that since their arrival in the UK, he hadn't once called or even mentioned the dreaded Alyson. Even she found that a little weird. Unless he was trying to be discreet and not mention his fiancé when he was around her, which was… thoughtful of him.

"I think you should move," Clare said childishly after finding herself unable to think of anything better to say. She was trying not to react to the playful challenge in his dark blue eyes.

"What's wrong?" Libby asked sleepily. She could no longer ignore whatever was happening across the room, and although she almost didn’t want to know, she knew that someone had to ask.

Clare glanced over at Libby to see her peering through the darkness at her. Her eyes were half shut as she relaxed against Justin’s chest. And although he didn’t look especially comfortable, Clare could see by the contented smile on Justin’s face that he'd rather tolerate an aching body than have Libby anywhere other than in his arms.

"Shazam here won't move,” Clare explained with a hiss, “so much for being a gentleman." Clare narrowed her eyes at JC but found him grinning up at her, a chuckle rumbling away in his chest.

Irritated by his obvious amusement, Clare’s frown deepened. “Move!” she ordered him, and for a moment considered reaching across to thump him on the back. At the last minute she realised that physical contact would be a step too far for her. If she couldn't get him to move with her voice then she'd return to her and Libby's room.

“Shazam?” Libby repeated, “You haven’t called him that in a while.” She shared a look with Justin and they both started laughing. “If he won’t hurt then just hurt him,” Libby said as she turned back to the TV screen. “Just do it quietly; some of us are trying to watch a movie.”

Clare turned back to JC and noticed the familiar, flirtatious expression on his face. She felt her stomach sink at the memory of all the times in the past that she’d enjoyed the playful banter that had come so naturally between them.

How different things might have been if only he hadn't left with Alyson that fateful night at the club. But Clare could torture herself until the end of time with 'what if's' and 'but's' and it still wouldn't change the outcome. He wasn't hers to banter with, he wasn't hers to flirt with, and he certainly wasn't hers to fall in love with.

Climbing back off the bed, Clare picked up her trainers in one hand and made her way silently out of the room. She drew the door closed behind her as quietly as possible.

As she entered her bedroom, Clare felt an overwhelming feeling of self-pity engulf her and tears pricked at her eyes as she thought of her friends next door. They all seemed to have found a way into each other's hearts whilst she was still alone and as unhappy as ever. Would she ever find what they had?

Dropping her shoes onto the floor, Clare stood still as she tried to stop her tears from falling. She hated feeling sorry for herself and knew that she should try to pull herself together but she just couldn't.

She was tired.

Tired of crying. Tired of pretending. Tired of hurting.

"I thought you wanted to see the movie?" A voice asked from the doorway and Clare fought the urge to let out a bitter laugh.

He'd followed her.

Of course he'd followed her.

"I changed my mind," she replied shortly, keeping her back turned to him until she could compose her face and blink away the tears that had formed in her eyes. There was a silence for a minute and Clare began to wonder if perhaps he’d taken the hint and left her alone, but then she heard him let out a deep sigh and she willed herself to somehow find a way to get through the next five minutes without crying.

"Clare..."

"What?"

"How long are you going to keep this up?"

Clare bit down hard on her bottom lip to control the sob that she could feel bubbling away inside her chest. It seemed to do the trick, and when she spoke her voice was controlled. "Keep what up?"

JC took a few steps towards her, and Clare willed him not to touch her. She knew that if he did then she would lose it completely. So far she'd managed to keep him at a safe distance, but she didn't know what she would do if that distance was breached. She didn’t want to have to find out.

"This game you got goin' on. I know you're angry with me and I kinda understand that, but we both know that this is no way to treat each other."

"What game?" she asked, pretending she hadn’t heard the rest.

JC gave out another sigh and Clare risked a glance over her shoulder at him before finally turning to face him properly. He answered her question, ticking off his reply like a list on his fingers.

"You won't talk to me, you won't listen to me, you won't sit with me and when we're alone you won't even look at me."

"I'm looking at you now," she replied with a shrug. "What's your point?"

JC froze, his mouth hanging open slightly at the petulant tone in her voice. "My point," he repeated through gritted teeth, "is that you are doing your very best to act as though I am invisible, and quite frankly I'm sick of it. Clare, I know I hurt you, but how are we ever to move forward from this if you won't let me explain?"

"Oh. My. God!" Clare shouted as she heard him say—for the thousandth time—the very words she hoped never to hear again in her life. "What can you possibly have to explain that could ever make what you did any better?" she spat at him.

"If you listen then maybe you would find out," JC challenged, his voice rising in response to her anger.

Clare shook her head angrily and refused to be persuaded. "You broke my heart," she yelled at him, folding her arms across her chest to stop them from shaking so hard. "There is nothing you can do or say to un-break it. Whatever you think you need to tell me won't change anything, so stop wasting your time."

"Wasting my time?" JC challenged, his hands balling up into fists at his side. "I'm trying to fight for us here, Clare. Something that actually meant something to me? I'd like to think that you'd be prepared to do the same thing, but you seem perfectly happy to just throw it all away at the first chance!"

"The first chance? You're engaged! You're having a baby! There is no point in us even having this conversation!" she shouted at the top of her voice. "You told me that it was over. Do you remember that? It is so inappropriate you even having this discussion with me! How can you not see that?"

Catching her eye in the doorway, Chris discreetly peered his head around the doorframe. He’d been volunteered by the others—to his displeasure—to go and break up the row between JC and Clare as things had gotten so loud that the group of friends had been concerned that soon someone would be sent up from the front desk to see what was going on.

The last thing *NSYNC needed was for their squeaky-clean reputation to be tarnished by rumours of late-night arguments in their hotel rooms.

"Hey, guys. You really need to cool it off," Chris warned in a disarming voice. "It's getting pretty loud and you'll get us in trouble."

Clare turned from Chris to JC and pointed at the open doorway. "Feel free to leave. I'm done."

"Yeah, well I'm not done," JC replied as he allowed Chris to escort him out of Clare's bedroom. "I'm going to get you to listen, Clare. No matter how long it takes."

"Try holding your breath," she shouted back as he disappeared from view.

~~~~~*~~~~~

'It seems you wanna give me / Oh, a lifetime of security / Down on your dying knees / I watch you beg, I watch you plead / But your words come much too late / My love for you has turned to hate / 'Cause you've taken too much time / To show me that you're mine

When I drop you boy you’ll need another toy / One that won’t stand up for herself / When I knock you down you’ll need another town / Where somebody’s gonna talk to you / You just let me wait now it's too late / For your delayed devotion'

~~~~~*~~~~~

~~~~~*~~~~~

"This is so much more boring than I thought it would be," Libby complained as she sat on the end of Lisa's bed and watched as she tried to find something to wear.

The guys, plus Jamie and Sara, had left the hotel hours ago to attend more interviews and start their sound check for that evening's show, but as the group were scheduled to remain in the same area for several nights—and they were all fed up of killing time on the bus—the other women had remained behind at the hotel.

"So much for 'spendin' time together,'" Libby quipped sarcastically as she remembered the words Justin had so sweetly said to her on the flight over.

Lisa glanced over her shoulder at Libby and flashed a sympathetic smile. "I know it's boring," she said, "but it’s still much better than being left at home."

"I guess," Libby muttered as she folded her legs beneath her.

"How are things with you and Curly anyway, Lib?" Lisa asked, causing Libby to smile at the mention of Justin’s nickname and automatically begin to blush.

"Fine," she said shyly and Lisa once again looked up from her suitcase to smirk at her.

"Only fine?" she said. "Oh dear!"

"Shut up!" Libby giggled, reaching behind her to grab a pillow from the head of Lisa's bed to toss across the room. It missed.

"What about you? You been feeling any better?"

Lisa pulled a face and began to zip up her case having chosen a pair of jeans and a long sleeved T-shirt to wear. "Not too bad,” she said. “I had this sickness bug for a while but that seems to have gone now. I guess it was some kind of virus?”

"Sickness?"

"Yeah. Every morning."

Libby looked pointedly at Lisa as her words sunk in. "Er… Lis? You're not pregnant, are you?"

“No!” Lisa exclaimed, turning around to face Libby with a shocked expression on her face.

"Okay, sorry!" Libby said as she defensively raised her hands in front of her face while giggling at Lisa’s reaction. "It's just you said that you were sick in the mornings. I just put two and two together."

"And came up with eleven thousand!"

Libby laughed, and they fell into a comfortable silence as Lisa dressed. "You know, it wouldn't be the worst thing in the world—"

"I am not pregnant!"

"—JC's having a baby. Ooh! They could grow up as best friends!" A sentimental smile crept over Libby’s face as she pictured Lisa and Joey with a baby.

Lisa stared at Libby for a moment as her brow furrowed into a frown. Before speaking she crossed the room and shut the door so that their conversation couldn’t be overheard.

"Libs, JC's not having a baby.”

"I thought Alyson was pregnant?"

"She is pregnant,” Lisa said, stalling slightly before delivering the news. “It's not JC's."

"What?" Libby gasped in shock.

"He found out not long after they became engaged. It seems that he was in the wrong place at the wrong time, so to speak. He broke off the engagement, and he hasn't been in touch with her since. That's what he's been trying to tell Clare."

Libby's eyes left Lisa’s face, and she found herself staring at the pattern on the bedcover as she tried to absorb the news. She could hardly believe it.

"Who else knows?" she asked after a while.

"Everyone except you and Clare, apparently."

"Justin?"

"He must've known, but he probably couldn't say anything. You know how close he and JC are."

Libby nodded, knowing that Lisa was probably right. Justin wasn't a gossip and he wouldn't have betrayed his friend’s confidence just because she was his girlfriend. He wasn’t like that. 

"I can't believe it,” Libby said, letting out a deep sigh. “Poor JC.”

"Don't let Clare here you say that…"

"But we have to tell her! She needs to know."

"We've all tried!" Lisa said defensively. “I even spoke to her about it yesterday on the bus, but I’m not sure if it did any good. She just won't listen, Libs. To JC or any of us. She thinks we’re trying to justify his actions, which of course we aren't, but he's not one-hundred per cent to blame either."

"She's stubborn," Libby agreed with a nod of her head.

"She sure is. But fortunately so is he."

“But the way Clare’s been avoiding him she might never find out.”

Lisa let out a huff. “I agree, which is why I told her that she has to at least hear him out. Nothing more, nothing less.”

“Do you think she will?”

“You tell me, it’s Clare.”

Libby pulled a face, still mulling over Lisa’s revelation. “She’s still pretty upset about it all. I think she feels betrayed.”

“I don’t get it myself. I mean, yeah, I’d have been upset that he’d moved onto someone else, but why is she so angry? He didn’t cheat on her…”

Libby met Lisa’s eyes, her face serious. She’d had this discussion with Justin, and so she already had her answer prepared. “In a way he did. He was practically her best friend, Lis—“

“I thought you were Clare’s best friend,” Lisa chuckled.

Libby allowed Lisa a small smile. “Yes. But I was… previously engaged, remember?” Lisa nodded, the laughter extinguishing slightly from her eyes. “JC was—no offence—the person Clare needed the most at probably the most difficult time, and he wasn’t there. Not to mention he chose that time to tell her that he was moving on. That’s kinda harsh.”

“But he knows he made a mistake. He’d been kicking himself ever since he worked it out. If she’d only let him explain what happened and how bad he feels. This could be all over tomorrow.”

“Hmm…” Libby mumbled, not completely convinced. “I dunno… I think it’d take a bit more than that…”

Lisa smiled, and playfully rolled her eyes. “Thank God I haven’t had to go through this with Joey. Our days of drama are well in the past.”

Libby smirked. “You sure he hasn’t got any skeletons buried in the closet?”

“No,” Lisa chuckled. “I’m pretty sure I know everything there is to know about that man. Despite what he likes to think, he’s not that interesting!”

~~~~~*~~~~~

"Clare?" Libby asked as she peered her head around the doorway of their room. She found Clare once again sitting cross legged on her bed tapping away at her laptop keyboard.

"Hmm…?" Clare mumbled as she momentarily glanced away from the screen to meet Libby’s eyes.

"Do you want to do something tonight? Go out somewhere I mean?"

Clare paused to consider the question. "What were you thinking of doing?"

"I'm not sure. Go to a bar? It's been so long since we've been back that I thought it could be fun to revisit some old haunts. Lisa wants to come, too."

“I thought we were supposed to be going to the show tonight?”

Libby shrugged. “There’s plenty of time for that. We’ll only be in Birmingham for a few nights.”

Clare smirked and raised an eyebrow. “And Justin doesn’t mind you missing his opening night?”

“I’m sure he’ll survive,” Libby quipped. “Besides, there’ll be plenty of other opportunities for that. How many chances do we get to have a girls’ night?”

“Hmm… I guess it could be fun to go out somewhere—”

“Yay!”

“—and I’m sure the fact that you can legally drink over here has nothing to do with it!”

Libby grinned, but refused to deny anything. “Great. I’ll go tell Lis.”

~~~~~*~~~~~

As the guys played their traditional game of hacky sack backstage, they could hear the screams and cheers from the fans as they awaited their arrival on stage.

"They seem pretty eager tonight," Jamie said to Chris as she watched him balance the hacky on the side of his right sneaker. His concentration momentarily lapsed, and the hacky slipped off his foot and onto the floor causing the other four men to groan loudly.

"Chris!"

As he reached forward to pick up the hacky an apologetic smirk lit up Chris’ face, and he glanced up through his lashes to meet his band mates’ eyes. "Sorry… tell Jamie off for distracting me."

"Now we gotta start again," Justin complained loudly as he shot a glare at Jamie. "Come on girls, keep your distance!"

Jamie exchanged an amused look with Sara and the two of them sniggered at the serious look on Justin's face. He took the game way too seriously, and had been in a bad mood since finding out that Lisa, Clare and Libby were going drinking instead of attending the show.

"We are sorry,” Sara said, her voice dripping with sarcasm.

"You should be," Justin told her sternly, his eyes never leaving Chris's foot. Because of this he completely missed the face that Sara pulled at him. "Now, Chris, concentrate!"

The members of *NSYNC managed to finish their game without any further interruptions and not long after they huddled together as a group to pray. It was the second to last thing they did before putting on their space helmets—to complete their space suits—and heading onto the stage.

The heavy intro music began to play, and even Jamie felt herself welling up with excitement as the roar of the crowd intensified.

"What did they say?" Sara asked Jamie as the guys reached their hands forward into a circle and chanted something unintelligible.

"I dunno," Jamie replied as she shrugged at Sara. “*NSYNC?”

~~~~~*~~~~~

The music started to 'Here We Go' and the members of *NSYNC appeared on stage to the delighted screams of their fans. The pumping music of the track filled the arena, and each member ripped of their spacesuit and burst into the routine for the opening song.

"Here we go, one more time

Everybody's feeling fine

Here we go now

Yes, yes, yes, here we go

*NSYNC has got the flow

Bounce your head to the beat

We've got everything you need

Here we go now

Yes, yes, yes, here we go

*NSYNC has got the flow…”

~~~~~*~~~~~

Libby and Clare's hysterical laughter filled the corridor as they attempted—unsuccessfully—to get their plastic key card into their hotel room door. Crying with laughter, Libby tripped over her own feet and sent herself crashing into Clare as the older woman shoved the card again and again into the machine.

"What’s wrong with keys?" Clare giggled as she glared at the plastic card in her hand. By now Lisa—who hadn’t had as much to drink—was most likely asleep in bed. At this rate, it’d be morning before Clare and Libby even managed to unlock their door.

"Do you need some help?" A familiar voice asked from behind them, and both Clare and Libby jumped at the unexpected noise. Libby clutched a hand to her chest and fell about laughing once again once she recognised JC and Justin. It wasn’t too long before Clare joined her.

Justin shared an amused glance with JC as they watched Libby and Clare fall about with laughter.

"I think someone's had a bit too much to drink," Justin said as Libby's legs buckled from underneath her. He jumped forward and reached his arms out to catch her before she landed on the floor. Libby gasped in between giggles, trying to catch her breath. "Isn't she a bit young?" Justin asked JC.

"Eigh… eight... eightee—" Libby struggled to explain between giggles, her inability to speak only making her laugh harder.

"She’s eighteen," Clare explained as Justin looked to JC for an explanation.

"I think they're trying to say that you can be eighteen to drink over here," JC said with a wry smile as Clare closed her eyes and leant against the door frame. The alcohol and the late night were starting to catch up with her.  

"Right," Justin said as he pulled Libby to her feet and held her somewhat steady as he reached out with his spare hand to take the key card from Clare. Libby soon started to slip however, and he quickly tossed the card at JC as he gripped onto her.

"It's broken or something," Clare said to JC as he prepared to open the door. He swiped the card through the machine, waited for the scanner to register the bar code and gave the door a hefty shove as the green light began to flash.

"You're right," he remarked sarcastically, "it's definitely broken."

Clare noticed his smug smirk and tried not to smile. It was pretty funny when she thought about it. She mumbled a thank you under her breath before attempting to walk into the room in a relatively straight line.

"You had a good time tonight then?" Justin asked Libby as he helped her into the room with one arm wrapped tightly around her waist. She giggled and tried to coordinate her feet so that she didn’t keep bumping against him.

"Yes, now bye," Clare said shortly as she threw herself face down onto her bed.

Justin exchanged a look with JC as Libby slipped out from under his arm and joined Clare on the bed. Something triggered them off, and they both started giggling again. 

“Come on,” JC said as he gestured with his hand at the open door. “Let’s leave ‘em.”

“We can’t leave them like this,” Justin said, horrified. “They can barely walk…”

“They’re fine, man.”

Justin turned back to Libby and pouted slightly. The opening night of his new tour and she was bladdered before he had a chance to tell her how it went. It wasn’t the way he’d been expecting the night to end, and he was pretty disappointed. He’d really been looking forward to telling her all about the show.

“Come on,” JC repeated. “You’re not going to get much sense out of either of them tonight.”

Reluctantly, Justin allowed JC to pull him out the door. With any luck Libby would be back to her normal self in the morning.

~~~~~*~~~~~

JC opened the door of his and Justin's room early the next morning at the sound of faint knocking. He instantly smiled as a grumpy looking Libby appeared before him—still dressed in her pyjamas—a pinched look on her face which he put down to being caused by a nasty hangover.

JC chuckled, and held the door open for her to come in. "That's a happy face,” he remarked with a grin.

Libby glanced up with narrowed eyes. She really wasn't in the mood. "Bite me,” she muttered. “Where's my J?"

JC nodded in the direction of Justin's bed where the young man was sleeping. He had one arm flung out to one side, the other across his eyes and his mouth hanging open. It was clear that he was fast asleep and probably would be for some time.  

Libby padded her way across the room without another word.

Not wanting to invade their privacy but having nowhere else to go, JC switched on the television, turned the volume to a reasonable level and lounged on his bed, keeping his eyes fixed on the screen.

"Wha…?” Justin gasped as he woke suddenly to find Libby climbing into bed beside him. She pulled the covers up to her shoulders and snuggled close to his chest before shutting her eyes. “What’s wrong?” He asked, automatically assuming that there was something wrong. 

“Headache,” Libby mumbled against his plain white t-shirt.

“Hangover more like,” JC sniggered from across the room before remembering that he was supposed to be pretending not to hear. He met Justin’s eyes long enough for the younger man to glare at him.

“You did drink quite a bit last night…” Justin reminded her as he reached out an arm and rubbed her back soothingly. “You should probably make sure you drink loads of water today.”

Libby kept her eyes closed. “That’s not it,” she said, “I’ve had a migraine for days.”

Once again JC’s eyes flicked over to meet Justin’s, and he unsuccessfully tried to keep the accusing look off his face. Justin’s eyes narrowed minutely before he turned his attention back to Libby.

JC had sat firmly in the anti–Libby coming on tour camp, and he’d been adamant that despite his friends’ attempts to talk him round—or rather, down—he was right all along. He thought that Libby was too weak for it to be safe for her to travel with them. Touring was exhausting at the best of times, but her vulnerability would not only be a concern for the group, but also a distraction.

Not to mention that it was a crazy idea for someone who’d been as unwell as she had. She’d recently been in a coma for goodness sakes! And he couldn’t understand why everyone seemed to have forgotten this.

As expected, JC’s opinions hadn’t been well received by Justin, who’d first tried to persuade, then argue, and finally sulk until he came around—which he had refused to. They were now at an impasse, and both of them had avoided raising the subject for fear of starting another argument. Until now.

JC’s face said it all. I. Told. You. So.

“Why haven’t you said anything?” Justin asked Libby as he deliberately ignored meeting JC’s eyes. He really didn’t want to hear it.

Libby gave a little shrug. “I didn’t want to worry you,” she said. “I’ve been taking tonnes of Tylenol, but it just doesn’t seem to be helping anymore.”

"Should you have gone drinking?" JC asked, unable to stop himself. Yes it sounded accusing, but someone had to say it, and he knew that Justin sure as hell wouldn’t.

“I didn’t plan to have that many,” she said, “but then these guys kept buying us drinks and I just lost track of how many I’d had.”

Justin tensed and his hand froze on her back. “What guys?” he asked as his expression hardened.

"Two guys came over and started chatting to us. They stayed for a while and kept buying us rounds. They were talking to Clare, and there were so many empty glasses on the table that after a while I forgot which ones were mine. I meant to stop after two—”

"What do you mean ‘chatting’?" JC interrupted suddenly. “Were they chatting her up?”

This time Justin didn’t hold back at all and he shot daggers at his band mate. That was so not the point and he knew it. This wasn’t about him and his issues with Clare, it was more serious than that.

“Kind of,” Libby said, “one of them did kind of ask her out on a date.” She opened her eyes at just the right time to see Justin glower over at JC. This time his anger wasn’t aimed entirely at his friend.

“Are you mad?” Libby asked Justin as she realised that she probably hadn’t painted a very good image of the night before. It hadn’t been like that, not really, but she was in too much pain to explain further.

They’d know that nothing had gone on, she told herself. It’d been a standard night out with the girls—they’d chatted about the men in their lives, had a few drinks, been flattered by the attention but had been quick to point out that everyone but Clare had boyfriends, and generally had a good time letting their hair down. It was what they did every time they had a girly night out, and the men had never had any issues with it before.

Justin chewed his inside lip to stop himself from saying something that he’d likely regret. Yes, he was annoyed. He’d hated the idea of the women going out drinking alone to begin with, let alone to find out that they’d been bothered by some dudes out on the pull. He’d pushed his insecurities and concerns aside at the time as he hadn’t wanted to be that guy, but now he’d begun to realise that he should’ve listened to his gut instinct more closely.

Someone should have gone with them, or at least convinced them to wait until after the show when they could all have gone out as a group. What had he been thinking letting Libby go drinking with only Clare and Lisa for protection? Libby was gorgeous; of course she’d draw attention. He should’ve been there…

He’d waited too long to say something and Libby’s worried eyes searched his face. “J? Are you mad at me?”

“No,” he said, his voice not quite convincing her. “I’m not mad, but I wish you’d have let someone go with you.”

“You mean chaperone us?”

Justin let out a sigh. “No, I don’t mean a chaperone. I mean, it ain’t right three women going drinking by themselves in a strange city. You should’ve had someone go with you to make sure you were safe.”

JC nodded emphatically.

“We were safe,” Libby replied, realising that her chances of snuggling back to sleep in his arms were nearly zero. She should’ve just stayed in her own bed. “Nothing happened, J. Honest. We had a few drinks, chatted and danced for a bit and then they left us alone.”

Justin’s brow furrowed again. Danced? Some dude had had his arms around his girlfriend?

"I thought you said Clare was asked out on a date?" JC asked bitterly, the jealousy evident in his voice. Libby cringed, not only at the regret she felt for having opened her mouth in the first place but also at the way her headache intensified at the sound of his raised voice. She sat upright and pressed a clammy hand to her forehead.

Justin watched her face carefully and let out a huff before shuffling past her to get out of bed. She watched him warily as he padded barefoot into the bathroom, ran the sink faucet and returned with a glass of cold water. He held it out to her and refused to move until she’d swallowed a mouthful.

“Um, yes,” she said as she wiped her mouth with the back of her hand and looked at Justin with wide eyes. She could tell by his face that he was a lot more annoyed than he was prepared to admit. She began to wonder whether her chance to let her hair down had really been worth it. Not if he was going to keep looking at her like that.

“I wish you’d told me about these headaches,” he said as he crossed his arms over his chest and frowned. “Maybe we should get you to a doctor?” He glanced at JC for advice, but the older man wasn’t even listening. His mind was completely absorbed with thoughts of Clare and her date.

“No, I’ll just take some more Tylenol,” Libby said, receiving another huff from Justin in response.

“Or you could just go to the doctor.”

“Or I could just take some more Tylenol.”

“Or you could just go to the doctor.”

“Or you could just lay off!”

“Stop!” JC shouted causing Libby to wince once again. She took another mouthful of water in the hopes that Justin was right and it would help to make her feel better. He nodded encouragingly when he saw that she was drinking. 

“What?” Justin snapped at JC as he removed the empty glass from Libby’s hand and returned to the bathroom to refill it for her.

JC narrowed his eyes at Justin’s tone but kept his eyes fixed on Libby. “You gotta tell me about this date…”

~~~~~*~~~~~

Lance opened the door of his room to find Sara smiling back at him cheerfully. She'd already had her breakfast and had decided to round up the members of the group on Jamie's behalf. Lance gave her a wave and invited her inside while gesturing silently at the cell phone that was attached to his ear. She hadn’t noticed that he was on the phone.

Sara hesitated in the doorway, wary of disturbing him while he was on the phone. She knew that Lance was a pretty private person, and she didn’t want it to seem like she was eavesdropping in on his conversation.

"Could you please tell her I called?" he said before hanging up abruptly and turning back to Sara with a tense smile on his face.

"You ready for practice?" Sara asked him brightly, hoping that it’d be enough to lighten the mood in the room. She could tell that something was bothering him, but she didn’t think it appropriate to ask. Out of all the members of the group, Lance was the one she knew the least well.

"Sure am," Lance said before grabbing his jacket from the bottom of the bed. “Let’s go.”

~~~~~*~~~~~

"What's the plan for today?" Clare asked Justin as he appeared in her doorway to let her know that Libby was hiding out in his room.

"The usual... interviews, photo–shoots. Oh, and Sara requested a last minute rehearsal.”

Clare glanced up from rifling through her suitcase for her phone charger and raised an eyebrow. “Uh–oh, who screwed up?”

There was only one reason why Sara would call a rehearsal one day into a new tour; and that would be because one of the members had snitched on another. The most likely candidate? JC.

"Me and Lance," Justin replied. "We missed a few steps during 'Giddy Up', so Mr. Perfectionist wants to go over them until we get it right."

"Fun," Clare quipped dryly. She could only guess how frustrating it must be to work with someone who was never satisfied until everything was perfect. Although she couldn’t really judge—she was just as bad.

“Me and Libby have plans to go shopping today,” she told him.

“If you can drag her out of my bed. She snuck in this morning and hasn’t left yet.”

“Yeah, she's not been sleeping that great. She mentioned something about going to find you."

“She’s like Goldilocks,” he chuckled as Clare resumed her search. He watched her casually for several minutes before letting his body rest against the doorframe. Things had been left pretty awkwardly between him and Libby, and it was still on his mind. JC had completely taken over the conversation with his questions about Clare and her date, and so he hadn’t had a chance to really get to the bottom of what had happened the night before.

Yes, he was jealous, but it was more than that. He didn’t like the thought of Libby drinking too much, and her mentions of constant headaches had worried him. He meant to talk to Clare about it at some point and now seemed as good a time as any. Sure, Sara would be annoyed that he was late for rehearsal, but she’d just have to bear with him. He wouldn’t be able to concentrate anyway until he’d gotten to the bottom of things.

“She told me about last night,” he said, the seriousness returning to his face. “Seems she might’ve had a bit too much to drink.” Not might’ve. Did.

Clare met his eyes, her expression unreadable. “What’s your point?”

“If she keeps getting these headaches all the time then she shouldn’t be drinking, right?”

“Are you asking me or telling me?”

“I’m just saying,” he said, being careful to keep his voice steady. He didn’t want to start a fight over this, and he knew that he and Clare were like gunpowder and flame when it came to Libby. One wrong word and there’d be an explosion. “I didn’t know about the headaches before. If I had I would’ve tried to talk her out of it.”

Clare let out a sigh. “No,” she said. “She’s been keeping them quiet.”

“Is it serious?”

“I don’t know. She refuses to talk about it, and when I bring it up she just blows me off by saying she’ll take some Tylenol.”

“That’s what she said to me,” Justin said. Clare nodded—it was just as she suspected.

“I suggested she go to see a doctor.”

Clare let out a snort of amusement and grinned at him. “How did that go?”

Justin flashed a wry smile. “Not well.”

“I bet. She’s as stubborn as a mule sometimes.”

Justin nodded in agreement. He’d always considered himself to be pretty strong willed, but he was nothing compared to Libby. And Clare was on another level completely if she and JC were anything to go by.

“She seems pretty sick this morning,” he said, the concern showing on his face. “I’ve told her to drink loads of water...”

Clare smiled fondly. He was such a worrier sometimes, but it was endearing to see his concern for Libby. It reminded Clare how deeply he felt for her friend. “I’ll take her out for lunch,” she said. “Make sure she eats something.”

“Thanks. We’ve got plans for dinner, so if you can keep an eye on her today…”

Clare sniggered. “You know, she’d hate overhearing this conversation right now. She already thinks we babysit her too much.”

Justin attempted a smirk but a slight frown remained on his face. “If last night is anything to go by then she needs more babysitting. Accepting drinks from strange men…” his voice trailed off as he shook his head sternly. “God…”

Clare rolled her eyes and chuckled. “You make it sound way worse than it was. It was a few drinks which we purchased from the bar and they paid for. Besides, they were more interested in me and Lisa than Libs.”

“Yeah, I heard about that.”

“Well then,” Clare said as a blush crossed her cheeks. He knew? And if so, who else had Libby told? “You can stop freaking out.”

~~~~~*~~~~~

"Okay, what's going on with you today?" Sara called to JC as he once again tripped over his feet. "Yesterday it was Justin and Lance and now you. Is something going on that I don't know about?"

"I think his mind is preoccupied," Justin said as JC shrugged at Sara and said nothing. He stared down at his feet and scuffed the toe of his trainer on the floor as Sara frowned at him in concern.  

Sara turned to Justin and raised an eyebrow. “Explain?”

“Giddy’s goin’ on a date tonight.”

Sara blinked and put her hands on her hips. “You have to be kidding.”

“It’s true,” Joey said from across the room. “Lis told me.”

Sara huffed. “I meant you have to be kidding that this is what’s stopping you from getting my choreography right. Come on, guys, this is serious! You wanna screw up on stage in front of ten thousand people? Can you not just focus for half an hour?”

Everyone except JC began to speak at once, each trying to justify the reasons behind their struggle with the steps but Sara didn’t want to hear it. She held her hands up in front of her as her aching brain screamed out for silence.

“Stop!” she shouted to be heard over them. “It doesn’t matter. Let’s take a break and meet back here in half an hour, agreed?” She glanced at her wrist watch and made a note of the time.

Each of the men nodded in agreement, except JC who was still lost in thought. Ever since Libby had mentioned Clare's date earlier that morning he'd been unable to think of anything else. And although he still hadn’t been able to get through to her, he’d convinced himself that it was only a matter of time. The very thought of her moving on without him had frightened him; it just wasn’t something he’d considered.

If she was doing this just to get back at him, to hurt him, then it was petty… but successful. He was jealous and growing worse by the hour.

Despite what Clare suspected, he hadn’t gone out of his way to hurt her. She’d been his best friend, and he’d never have done anything to deliberately upset her or cause her pain. Life had taken him on a detour that neither of them had expected; but he was back on the right path now and yet it seemed she’d completely closed off. Written him off, even. Was she really so over it that she was ready to start dating other men? She’d moved on and yet she still couldn’t even speak or look at him?

It made him feel sick. He couldn't bear the thought of her being with another man, even if it was only to have dinner and drinks. He was the one she should be dressing up to go out for the evening with. She should be wanting to spend time with him, not a stranger.

"Come on, man," Chris said gently as he placed a hand on JC's shoulder, bringing him back from his inner turmoil. "It's only one date."

"Is it?" JC asked him sullenly.

"Of course," Chris said with a good-natured laugh. "She’s only gonna be in Birmingham for a few nights and then we move on to London. And that’s ignoring the fact that she lives in the US now."

"And if she decides to move back here?"

"Why would she do that?" Chris asked. "She hated it over here, remember? That’s why she decided to move in the first place. She made that decision long before she met you and me. Do you really think she’d make a huge decision like that just because you two have fallen out? Come on!”

"She quit her job because of me," JC told him matter-of-factly, staring Chris down.

The smile tightened on Chris’ face and became more of a smirk. “Oh, yeah.” He’d forgotten about that.

~~~~~*~~~~~

JC burst into Clare and Libby's room just as Clare was getting herself ready in the bathroom for her date. She was startled to hear the door be thrown open so suddenly and she clutched a hand over her heart as she tried to recover from the shock.

Libby was having dinner with Justin in the restaurant downstairs and so Clare hadn't been expecting anyone to interrupt her. "What the hell?" she exclaimed in an alarmed voice as she stuck her head through the open doorway to glare at him. "Jeez, you scared me."

JC flicked the lock on the door before turning around to face her with a stony expression on his face. "We need to talk," He said firmly and Clare felt a twinge of panic in her stomach at the expression on his face.

He’s gonna try to explain again. And this time he’s not gonna let anyone interrupt. The tension built in her stomach until she almost wanted to laugh out loud. He was so stubborn that it was almost funny. Almost.

Clare narrowed her eyes and stomped forcefully towards the doorway. She reached a hand past his elbow to unlock the door.

“Don’t,” he told her as he reached out to place a hand over hers to stop her. “We have to talk about this Clare. No arguments.”  

No arguments, she thought with a snigger. As if.

“And we need the door locked for that?” She asked raising a questioning eyebrow but allowing him to push her hand away.

The door remained locked.

“I’m not letting you walk out again, throw me out or risk having someone come in and interrupt. Whether you like it or not, you’re going to listen until I’m finished. Understood?”

Clare stared at his serious blue eyes with her mouth open slightly and her eyes wide. She’d always loved it when he took charge, but now she didn’t know how to react. She couldn’t let him just bulldoze over her, but at the same time she was slightly relived that he was taking a stand. Deep in her heart she was just ready for it all to be over, even if it meant it would be the final death throe of their friendship.

She sucked in a deep breath and prayed that she’d be able to maintain her composure. Either way she couldn’t stay here, close enough that she could smell his familiar cologne. It was safer in the bathroom where she had some distance.

“You can talk,” she said before heading back across the room into the en–suite. “But I have a date to prepare for, so you’d better make it quick.”

JC let out an angry huff but refused to let her rile him. This was his chance, and he had to make it count.

"This whole situation with you not talking to me is totally unjustified," he said.

“Oh, it is, is it?” Clare kept her eyes fixed on her reflection in the mirror and leaned forward to make it easier to apply her mascara. She was determined not to look at him at all costs. His deep, piercing stare was already burnt into her memory.

“Yes.”

~~~~~*~~~~~

"How long do you think Clare will continue to shut JC out?" Chris asked his girlfriend as they lay together on Jamie’s bed watching a movie on cable TV. Jamie pondered the question for a moment before turning to meet his eyes. She smiled sadly and reached out to take his hand in hers.

“I dunno. Part of me is surprised it’s gone on this long, but then Clare's never had her heart broken before."

"What do you mean?"

Jamie smirked and rolled her eyes. “Exactly what it sounds like—JC broke her heart. I wouldn't blame her if she never spoke to him again." Her eyes flicked back to the TV, but Chris’ remained on her face as he absorbed her words.

"What? Why?"

"Come on, Chris. You know the answer to that. He led her on and then dumped her for another woman. And a slutty woman who treated him like crap at that. That's not very flattering for Clare."

"But they were never a couple!" he exclaimed, feeling the need to defend his friend. He didn’t understand why all the women seemed to keep forgetting this fact.

“But they nearly were,” she said. “He kissed her and then got back with his ex. How is she supposed to react? How would you have reacted?"

"He only got back with her because she told him she was pregnant."

"And he couldn't have been with Clare and still support the child?" Jamie asked, her voice taking on an accusing tone. She shrugged her shoulders in a way that said ‘there ya go’ causing Chris’ temper to flare. It irked him the way she acted as though she had all the answers.   

"That's one of my brothers you're talkin' about," he reminded her sharply.

Jamie met his eyes and raised an eyebrow at his tone. Were they really going to argue about this again? If he hadn’t wanted to hear her answer then he shouldn’t have raised the subject. She dropped his hand and sat upright.

"He's my friend, too," she reminded him with a frown. "You asked me, I'm answering."

"I didn't ask you to 'dis the guy!" Chris told her as he, too, sat upright.

"So naturally you'd expect me to agree with everything you say? You’d like that, would you?"

"Of course not, you know I love you for having your own mind. I just assumed that you'd see it from JC's perspective."

"And not from one of my best friend’s? I know what Clare's been through and how horrible it is. I'd support her no matter what happens between them."

"Well, JC talks to me. I know how much he's suffering, too."

They both sat there feeling resentful, staring at each other through narrowed eyes before realising that they’d reached an impasse.

Chris was first to break the awkward atmosphere, and he reached across to pull Jamie comically into his arms. She tried to maintain the moody expression on her face, but couldn't fight her laughter when he smirked at her and tickled her around the ribs to make her laugh. It never failed to break her bad mood.

"I am so glad that it's not us," he said as he reached forward to place a kiss on her lips.

Jamie smiled against his mouth. “Me too.”

~~~~~*~~~~~

JC stuffed his hands deep into his jean pockets and let out a sigh. He only had one chance to say what he needed to say, and as Clare was already only half listening—or so he thought—he knew that he had to be quick and precise.  

"Look, I've obviously prepared this massive speech to say, but seeing as you're barely listening to me, I'm just going to say what needs to be said however it comes out."

Clare said nothing, but risked a glance at him in the mirror as she put down her mascara and swapped it for eyeliner. She discreetly sucked in a breath and bit down hard on her tongue to prepare herself for whatever it was that he’d been desperate to tell her. She could feel her heart hammering away in her chest and the adrenaline surge through her veins.

Deep breaths, deep breaths. Keep calm…

"Me and Alyson are not together. We're not engaged, and she's not having my baby."

Silence.

Clare lifted the eyeliner to her lids and continued applying her makeup as though she hadn't heard him. Fortunately, he was far enough away that he couldn’t see that her hand was trembling, or that the line she was drawing was wobbly.

"Did you hear me?" he asked, stunned by her silence. He’d expected a reaction of some sort. Good or bad, but not this. Not… nothing.

"Yes. I heard you."

"And?"

"And what?"

JC's eyes bugged out of his head. There was no way that the Clare he knew would react to this news in such a dismissive way. Throw something at him? Yes. Scream and shout? Yes. Say nothing? No.

"Don't you have anything to say?" he asked her, his eyes desperately wide. He took a step forward to shorten the distance between them. Maybe she was just in shock?

Clare slowly put down the eyeliner and reached forward to brace her arms on the enamel sink. She sucked in a few calming breaths before turning her head to look at him. Her eyes were piercing and held a fire that JC hadn’t been expecting. He’d hoped that she’d be relieved by his news and, hopefully, happy. He hadn’t expected her to be even angrier than before, but that was the reaction he received. Her eyes shot fiery thunder bolts straight through him.

"Let me get this straight...” she said in a trembling voice, “you think that after four months of misery you can tell me that you’re no longer an item with your ex, and I'm supposed to just fall right back into your arms?"

JC stood there, stunned. "I made a mistake," he spluttered.

“A mistake,” she repeated with a bitter laugh. “I’ve never needed you more than during those months, JC, and you were gone. You were with her. I nearly lost my best friend. I needed you, and you didn’t care.”

“Of course I cared!”

“But you weren’t there. You dropped me for someone who could offer you a better time. You dismissed our two year friendship for a piece of ass, and you wonder why I’m hurt; why I’m angry, and why I can’t even look at you.”

"She told me she was pregnant!"

"Which she was?"

JC paused, and cringed as he admitted the words out loud. “It wasn’t mine.”

Again, Clare laughed bitterly. It wasn’t funny, in fact it made her want to cry, but somehow her tear ducts seemed to have been rewired to make her laugh instead of cry.

"So you'd have rather been with a deceiving, cheater of an ex-girlfriend than someone who actually loved you—albeit stupidly?"

"Clare, you knew I loved you… I told you I loved you."

"Which I presume you think will somehow make me feel better? You loved me, but not enough to be committed to me even before we were together. You still went off and had your fun, then decided to 'do the right thing' and tell me that you’d been seeing someone else—sorry, sleeping with someone else. If I remember rightly, you even let her be the one to tell me that you were engaged. Wow, that’s real considerate of you, JC.”

JC grimaced at Clare’s words. He couldn’t deny that everything she’d said was completely on target. She continued to stare him down, somehow finding the strength to tell him everything that she’d been holding in for so long.

"Don't get me wrong,” she said, “I'm glad to hear that you've finally seen the light. But I'm afraid that if you were expecting some big reunion between us then you're going to be disappointed."

JC dropped his eyes to the floor and let out a big sigh as his shoulders sagged. He felt completely drained. Despite trying again and again to get her to listen to him, he hadn’t really given much consideration to how she might react when he did. That had clearly been a mistake. He felt empty inside.

He realised that there was nothing left to say. Not tonight anyway. Hearing his actions replayed to him had sent a chill through his heart and he felt thoroughly ashamed of his actions. Was it too late? Would she ever be able to forgive him? He’d come a long way tonight, but clearly there was still a long way to go. He only hoped that he had the strength to get them there. 

~~~~~*~~~~~

~~~~~*~~~~~

Lisa removed the pregnancy kit from the brown paper bag she had clasped in her hand and stared down at it in apprehension.

She hated Libby for putting the thought in her head that she might be pregnant. If it hadn't been for her, Lisa wouldn't have even considered the possibility, but now it was all that she could think about.

She’d always been religious about taking contraceptives since she was sixteen, and although the doctor had carried out a routine pregnancy test at the surgery when she’d first complained of sickness, it had been negative. Still she knew that there was a small margin for error with all tests, and that a pregnancy test should always be repeated a few days after just to be sure of the result.

Lisa’s menstrual cycle was always pretty regular, and although she'd not missed a period this past month, she had noticed that her flow had been lighter than usual. It wasn't something that had worried her at the time, but now that she put all of her symptoms together she was aware that they all pointed to one very obvious conclusion.

That she was expecting.

Her stomach twinged with anxiety at the thought, and she roughly ripped open the box to find and read the instructions inside.

~~~~~*~~~~~

Joey paced the small confides of the hotel room where he and Sara were waiting for Lisa to come out of the bathroom. He'd been back from the show for about an hour, and had forgone his usual shower to be with Lisa whilst she took the pregnancy test.

"Would you sit down?" Sara complained as she watched Joey walk back and forth in front of the door for the hundredth time. She understood that he was anxious, but his relentless pacing was making her feel worse, and she knew that it wasn't helping him any either.

Lisa had told Sara that she was going to take a test, if only to put the thought once and for all out of her mind, and Sara had agreed to wait with her for moral support.

"What’s taking her so long?" Joey asked anxiously as he turned to Sara. "It's a five minute test, and she's been in there for half an hour, at least."

~~~~~*~~~~~

As Lisa looked at the small, plastic window on the tube that would give her the result of the test, she forced herself to take deep, calming breaths. Three minutes. When had three minutes ever seemed so long a time to wait?

She looked up at the ceiling and squeezed her eyes shut, willing the result to be the one that she was hoping for. She began to count down from one hundred slowly, hoping that by the time she’d finished she would at least have crossed the dreaded three minute mark.

As she neared zero, Lisa glanced down at the box in her lap and read the instructions one last time, memorising the results.

A plus for positive, a minus for negative, she repeated silently to herself again and again before finding the courage to peep at the test.

~~~~~*~~~~~

"You have to calm down," Sara said as reassuringly as she could as Joey continued to stare at her desperately, "Maybe it's not the result she wanted and she needs some time."

The click of the bathroom door opening caused both Sara and Joey's heads to snap round simultaneously, and they both searched Lisa's tearful face for her reaction to the test results.

Lisa bit down hard on her lip and squeezed her eyes shut, unable to look at their hopeful faces as hot tears began to roll down her cheeks.

Sara heard Joey inhale noisily, and she got to her feet to wrap Lisa in a supportive hug.

"Bad news?" she asked in a tense voice, steering Lisa over to the nearest bed and helping her to sit down.

"I'm pregnant," Lisa sobbed, turning to look at Joey who stared back at her with wide, shocked eyes.

Seeing his reaction, Lisa burst into noisy tears and collapsed sideways on the bed, squashing her face into the bedding. Sara sat down next to her in shock and rubbed circles with her hand soothingly over Lisa's back.

"What am I going to do?" Lisa asked in a distraught voice, the sound muffled by the duvet, and Sara glanced over at Joey who seemed to suddenly snap back to reality.

He rushed to Lisa's side. "Baby, baby, it's alright. We'll work something out."

~~~~~*~~~~~

"Thanks for dinner, I had a good time," Clare said with a smile as she stood with her back against the taxi door, preparing to say good–night and make her way back to the hotel. She'd gone out anticipating having a nice evening, but her conversation with JC had clouded her mood. Although she'd found her date's conversation interesting, she knew that there was no real connection between them, and they weren't suited to each other. She’d never really intended the date to go any further than one evening anyway.

In her heart of hearts she knew that she'd only agreed to a date to spite JC. It was the best way she could think of to get back at him.

"Yeah, but the night's still young. There's no need to rush off yet," Clare’s date, Nathan, told her with a cocky grin on his face. He’d been throwing cheesy one–liners like that at her all night, but she’d batted them away as best she could. He wasn’t half as charming as he thought he was.

Clare laughed good-naturedly, but grasped the door handle of the taxi cab behind her back anyway, already wishing that she was inside. "Thanks, but I'm not really a late night kinda gal'," she told him with a tense smile before turning away to open the cab door.

"Sure you are," Nathan replied as he reached past her to slam the partially open cab door closed with his palm.

"No, really," Clare said firmly, all traces of a smile vanishing from her face. This guy wasn't getting the message, and she was beginning to feel uncomfortable. She'd forgotten how pushy and demanding men could be, having grown used to the respectful politeness of her male friends. She began to wonder if their gentlemanly behaviour had ruined all other men for her.

"Come on, Clare. Don't tell me I've wasted all that money on taking you out for no reward." He grinned a toothy grin and closed the distance between them.

By this point, Clare had already worked out her next move, and so it was easy for her to quickly raise her knee to his groan as he leered over her, causing him to fall directly to the pavement in pain. Making the most of the chance to get away, Clare ran around to the other side of the taxi cab and jumped inside, slamming the door shut forcefully behind her.

As soon as she was inside, the taxi driver flicked the locks preventing Nathan from coming after her. He spun around in his seat to face her, a concerned frown on his face.

"Are you alright, love? I was just about to get out and sort that bloke out. I hope he didn't frighten you?"

"I'm fine, thank you," Clare lied, placing a hand over her heart to try to compose herself. She counted her breathing until she felt slightly more in control. "Take me back to the hotel, please." She reached forward through the open partition that separated them and handed the cabbie the directions to the hotel.

"Right-ho," he said as he turned back around and started the engine.

Clare turned her head away from where Nathan was staggering to his feet and watched the bright lights of the city in front of her as the taxi navigated its way into the evening traffic. She felt sick. She needed to get back to the hotel.

~~~~~*~~~~~

Clare was still shaking as she made her way out of the taxi and waited by the driver's window to pay her fare. He seemed to sense that she was a lot more distressed than she was letting on and he quickly told her to forget the bill.

Thanking him, Clare quickly made her way inside the hotel, no longer finding the dark sky and the bright lights of the city as enchanting as she had earlier.

Not wanting to scare Libby—who she knew would be waiting for her in their room and insist on hearing a full run down of her evening—Clare decided to head to the hotel bar to get herself a drink before facing her friend.

She needed something to settle her nerves and stop the shaking of her limbs.

Spotting a discreet, empty table far away from the bar, Clare first ordered herself a martini with lemonade and then went and sat down. Trying her best not to relive the last hour in her head, she folded her arms in front of her and rested her forehead on them, closing her eyes as she willed herself not to give into the tears that were threatening to spill.

What was going on with her life? Why was it that everything she touched went wrong?

I'm alone yeah, I don't know if I can face the night / I'm in tears and the cryin' that I do is for you / I want your love / Let's break the wall between us / Don't make it tough / I'll put away my pride / Enough's enough / I've suffered and I've seen the light

You're my angel / Come and save me tonight / You're my angel / Come and make it all right

"Bad date?"

Clare lifted her head to look up, not bothering to wipe away the tears that were spilling down her face. Her eyes scanned the bar for the face behind the voice.

She didn't have to look far.

He was standing right next to her.

At first he seemed to be enjoying the humour behind his joke, but upon seeing her face JC’s expression changed to one of concern and he quickly crouched down so that his face was level with hers. In that moment, all the drama and anger between them faded away to nothing.

"Clare, what's wrong?" he asked as her tears continued to fall. “Talk to me, what’s happened?”

Clare shook her head. She didn't want to talk about it, least of all with him.

A few months ago she'd have had no problem telling him anything and everything that was pressing on her mind—with a few obvious exceptions—but that’d all changed now. There was a barrier between them that she’d deliberately yet regretfully put up. She was no longer allowing him to be her shoulder to cry on, and that thought alone saddened her more than any other.

"What's wrong with me?" she asked him in a wobbly voice. Instantly JC’s jaw clenched, and he rocked forward on the balls of his feet so that Clare couldn’t escape his intense stare.

"Nothing,” he told her absolutely, staring deep into her eyes. Clare glanced away dismissively, but JC quickly repeated his words. He reached forward to take her hand and bring her attention back to him. "I mean it. There is nothing wrong with you. Why would you even ask that?"

At the feel of his touch, Clare found herself staring down at their joined hands, and she felt another sob rise up in her throat. How long had it been since he'd touched her like this? Had it really been the eternity that it had seemed to her? Had he missed their friendship as much as she had? Did he now blame her for keeping them apart for so long?

Clare looked up after a moment and stared deep into his eyes, letting herself relive their earlier conversation in the hotel room.

“A mistake,” she repeated with a bitter laugh. “I’ve never needed you more than during those months, JC, and you were gone. You were with her. I nearly lost my best friend. I needed you, and you didn’t care.”

She had needed him. More than she could put into words.

Thinking back to that terrible time, Clare was amazed to think that she had survived the whole thing without him. Hadn't he been everything to her at one time? Hadn't there been a time when she couldn't genuinely have imagined him not being a part of her life?

If she could've gone back and spoken to the Clare that she used to be—the loving, light-hearted Clare who had no idea the pain life would be soon throwing her way—she would’ve told herself not to lean so heavily on him. Not to pin all of her current and future happiness on his shoulders. To spare herself the pain she would have to go through by having him ripped away from her.

She knew the experience had made her stronger, but it had also made her cynical and bitter, and she hated that. She hated what she’d become. It wasn’t her. It wasn’t the real her.  

Would she ever be able to be his friend again? Would she ever be able to bring herself to break down the walls between them? Would she ever be able to allow herself to get close to him again? To be his friend? To allow him to be honest with her, and her with him? Completely, this time, without holding anything back.

Hadn't experience shown her that he'd always tried to be honest with her, even when it hurt him to do so? A small part of her understood that he’d been put in an impossible situation that day, and that he'd been forced to push aside his own desires to stand by someone who needed him?

He'd admitted that he loved her even though he'd known that he would have to push aside that love to be with Alyson, for the sake of the baby. A whole lifetime of sacrifice for another person. A baby that would’ve turned out to not even have been his. Wasn't his selfless and forgiving spirit part of what she loved about him?

"...Me and Alyson are not together. We're not engaged, and she's not having my baby."

Would it have made a difference if she had known? Would she have been more willing to listen? To understand? She couldn't count the amount of times that she’d been chewed out by Jamie in the past for being dismissive, and refusing to listen when her temper flared up. Her stubborn streak had often ended up causing her pain, but never more so than now.

Hadn't JC tried repeatedly to get her to listen? Hadn't she thrown it in his face, abused and hurt him, and yet he'd continued to return, again and again, to try to reason with her?

She'd hated him for it of course, feeling that he was only going to hurt her further, but he'd only wanted to try to ease her pain. Would she have been so persistent if the shoe had been on the other foot? Would she have refused to give up, no matter how impossible the situation seemed?

Yes, and the reason was obvious. She loved him, and he loved her.

The tears began to dry on Clare's cheeks as she stared at him, and he back at her. In those few moments, their eyes said more than their words ever could, and Clare felt a warmth inside of her that she knew was beginning to thaw the ice in her heart.

"You're a good guy," she said eventually, "I realise that now."

JC seemed unsure of how to respond. "Thank you?" he replied hesitantly.

"There aren't many out there," Clare remarked as she thought back to her encounter at the restaurant.

“What happened tonight, Clare?” JC asked, the concern creeping back into his face.

"I think I realised something," Clare said, not thinking ahead about what she was going to say but just letting the words flow directly from her heart, "I can go on avoiding you and screaming at you, pushing you further and further away, but you're not going to stop trying to talk me round. You'll always be there trying to convince me to listen. To give you a chance."

“Always,” he said emphatically, his eyes burning with sincerity.

"And it doesn't matter how much it hurts, pushing you away will only make it worse. You hurt me, but I can't keep hurting myself by hating you."

JC maintained his eye contact with her, as he opened up his own heart. “I'm never going to stop beating myself up for hurting you, Clare. I don't deserve your forgiveness, but I'll do whatever it takes to earn it.”

"I don't know if it's forgiveness, or if I've just given up the fight," She told him with a weary sigh. "I thought it would be easy to hate you, but it isn't."

JC wanted to laugh out loud at the irony of that statement, but decided that it was best not to. It might’ve been difficult for her, but she’d certainly made a good job of hating him.

"I miss my friend,” she said, smiling at him for the first time in months.

JC's returning smile was brilliant. "I've missed my friend, too."

"I can't tell you what—" He paused, realising that even though they may have started repairing their friendship, there were certain subjects that it was best not to broach.  

Clare pulled a face and tilted her head to the side, already feeling more like the old Clare again. “I really don’t want to—“

"—hear it, I know," he finished for her before offering her a self-depreciating smirk.

There was a short silence as they both stared at each other, having a weight of words that needing saying pressing on their shoulders, and yet finding their minds completely blank.  

"It's going to take awhile to get used to you not screaming at me all the time," JC said with a chuckle as he glanced down at their hands and realised that he still had hers grasped gently between his fingers. He gave it a reassuring squeeze. Clare allowed herself to laugh with him. "You've certainly been keeping me on my toes."

"It's good for you,” she said. “There are plenty of women who throw themselves adoringly at your feet, it's about time someone evened up the balance."

“Well, thanks, but I think you’ve given me a nervous disorder.”

They fell into a semi-comfortable silence, and Clare pondered where their conversation would head next. She wasn't in the mood for anything heavy, so she decided to keep it light. No longer able to feel his toes, JC reluctantly got to his feet and dragged a chair close to where Clare was sitting. The muscles in his legs almost instantly started to cramp, but he didn’t care. It had been worth it.

"How was the show?" Clare asked as he took a seat, breaking eye contact for a moment to seek out and reach for her drink. She bought the glass to her lips with a trembling hand which they both pretended not to notice.

Now that she had time to think about it, Clare realised that he must’ve only just returned from the exhibition centre when he'd found her in the bar. She eyed his clothing when she thought he wasn't looking and was surprised to see that he was wearing only a loose fitting t-shirt and a pair of tracksuit bottoms—his usual post show, pre-shower attire. 

"It was okay," he answered and Clare detected an unusual hint of dissatisfaction in his voice. She raised a questioning eyebrow at him which made him laugh.

"I was the screw up tonight," he replied bashfully. "They're gonna give me hell tomorrow."

Clare smiled to herself. She could see the irony that JC was finally going to get a touch of his own medicine. She could already picture the look on his band mates faces as they rub his face in his mistakes—good naturedly, of course. "Just not feeling it?"

"Distracted, I guess." JC replied with a shrug, but Clare knew that his mistakes would be causing him a lot more turmoil than he was letting on. He hated to mess up, and was always harder on himself than anyone else. "I think I'll be better from now on," he added as an afterthought, and Clare felt a blush on her cheeks as she caught the look in his eyes as they met hers.

She swallowed, and reached again for her drink and took another big sip.

'It’s not that I can’t live without you / It’s just that I don’t even want to try / Every night I dream about you / Ever since the day we said goodbye / If I wasn’t such a fool / Right now I’d be holding you / There’s nothing that I wouldn’t do / Baby if I only knew / The words to say / The road to take / To find a way back to your heart...'

"Josh…" Clare began after placing her drink back on the table. She glanced down at her lap and fiddled with her fingers as she tried to put her thoughts into words. "I’m glad we’re talking again and everything, but I think I’m going to have to take it day by day—"

"Clare," JC said firmly causing her eyes to shoot up to meet his. "I don't want you to feel any pressure from me. Quite frankly, it already feels like an incredible achievement that you are even talking to me. I'm not going to push my luck." He chuckled and flashed a smile.

"There's just too much to think about to just rush into something. I don't even know how I feel about you anymore,” she admitted honestly.

She looked into his eyes hoping to see that he understood. Her feelings were too jumbled to allow herself to rush into declarations of something that she may later regret. Only an hour or so ago she'd still been furious with him and she didn't know how quickly she'd be able to brush those feelings away, even after his apology.

"We're friends again, right?" he asked her with a hopeful smile.

"I guess." He raised an eyebrow, and Clare was quick to correct herself. “I mean, yes.”

"Then let's go from there."

Clare felt herself smile at his words, and a warm feeling of relief wash over her. She'd hoped that he'd understand, and he had. Now all she had to do was try to allow herself to trust him again. It might be a slow road, but she already knew that she was well on the path to recovery.

"You're still shaking," he remarked as she lifted her glass to finish the last few mouthfuls of her drink. Clare followed his eyes to her hand as she drew the glass away from her face. The last few cubes of ice that had settled at the bottom of the glass tinkled together at the movement.

"Oh," she said, realising that he was right, and that she did still have the shakes. "Anxiety, I guess," she told him with a dismissive shrug, "I feel like I've been on an emotional rollercoaster tonight." She attempted a laugh which came out way too loud and shaky. Yes, her emotions were on overdrive.

"About that," JC said as the concerned frown returned to his face. "What did happen on your date?"

'I don’t know how it got so crazy / But I’ll do anything to set things right / ‘Cause your love is so amazing / Baby you’re the best thing in my life / Let me prove my love is real / And make you feel the way I feel / I promise I would give the world / If only you would tell me girl / The words to say / The road to take / To find a way back to your heart...'

~~~~~*~~~~~

~~~~~*~~~~~

Lisa woke at the first sign of dawn coming through the window in her hotel room. She'd had a fretful night, and had only managed to get a few hours’ sleep. Her anxiety over the pregnancy test had refused to let her mind rest even for a minute, and when she’d slept her dreams had been dark and unsettling.

Sara had agreed to switch rooms temporarily so that Joey could spend the night with Lisa, and Lisa had been grateful for Sara’s understanding. It was uncomfortable enough that her friend knew all about her situation without having to discuss their plans in front of her. Lisa still didn't know how she felt about being pregnant; it was still too much of a shock to fully absorb.

She'd sat up for most of the night with Joey discussing their ideas about how to go forward, but Lisa was acutely aware that he’d been holding back a lot of his personal feelings until she revealed how she felt. It was sweet of him, but only really added to her concerns. It wasn’t that Lisa wanted him to tell her what to do, but she needed to know what he was thinking regardless of how she felt.

But how did she feel? She hadn't even found a way to answer his proposal yet, let alone consider how children would fit into their lives. Here she was, about three thousand miles away from home, practically living out of a suitcase, and now she had to make a life changing decision on practically no sleep? And if she did make a decision, what should she do next? She was in a foreign country after all; would a doctor even agree to see her, or would she have to go home?

Lisa had always known that she'd want children someday, but now wasn’t a good time. How could she finish her degree and get a job as an architect—her life’s dream—with a baby on her hip? Not to mention that Joey would be absent for months on end, especially if the group continued in their success. In fact, if things picked up she might see him even less. Could she handle being left at home with a baby? Could she be contented as a stay at home mom? Her family lived out of state, so it wasn’t as if she could count on them for help and support either, and childcare was so expensive…

Not to mention the headache she'd receive from her grandparents, who were very traditional and would’ve expected her to be married before she had any children of her own. How would it look if she married him because she was knocked up? Suddenly she wished that she’d not been so proud and delayed answering his proposal. At least if they were engaged people might not be so quick to judge.  

Lisa yawned, and wiped the sleep from her eyes before turning over to look at Joey. He was sitting on the edge of Sara's bed staring at her, and from the tiredness in his eyes and the bags under them Lisa could tell that he’d been sitting there for a while, if not most of the night.

"Mornin'," he said with an attempt at a weak smile causing Lisa to try her best to smile back.  Neither of them reached their eyes. "Did you sleep?"

"Not really," Lisa said as she supported the side of her face with her palm. "You?"

"On and off."

Lisa nodded before grimacing at the worry lines that seemed to have appeared on his brow overnight. She knew she was the reason they were there. "I'm sorry, Joe, you've gotta perform tonight and you must be shattered."

"It doesn't matter about me. I'm more worried about you."

"I just don't know what to do,” she said, her voice wobbling slightly. “I didn't expect to ever have to think about this."

A fleeting look of hurt crossed Joey’s face which Lisa was quick to notice. Realising that he’d probably misunderstood her words, she felt the need to explain.

"What I mean is that I always thought that kids would turn up at the right time, you know? That I'd be settled in my career, probably married and with a home of my own. Not like this. Not in the middle of me getting started in my career, and in the middle of studying."

Joey listened silently and nodded along, but Lisa could tell that he wasn't quite in agreement with her. He came from a big family, and so he’d probably expected to be surrounded by kids and grandkids someday. But surely even he’d agree that now wasn't the best time?

"You want this baby, don't you?" she asked him abruptly causing Joey’s eyebrows to shoot up in surprise.

"Like I said last night,” he said calmly, “I'll support you with whatever decision you make."

"But I want to hear what you think,” Lisa said sharply in reply. “This has to be our decision, Joe. I can't just go ahead with what I want and have you judging me for the rest of our lives."

"That won't happen, Lis. This is a life changing thing for you—for both of us—but it's your career and body that will change. I would never judge you."

"I would," Lisa answered, and a tear slipped from her eye and ran down her cheek. "I’ve always looked down on people who get pregnant accidentally. I thought they were selfish and cruel to choose their own lives over a child, but now that it's happened to me I feel so confused. I wish I could just go back in time and stop this from happening."

"I know, baby," Joey said as he crossed the distance between them and pulled Lisa into his arms. "But maybe this has happened for a reason? You never know."

Lisa sniffed and glanced up at him with wide, watery eyes. "I love you, Joe,” she said emphatically. “You know that, right?” Again the guilt over his unanswered proposal began to eat away at her.

"I love you too,” he replied as he gave her body a squeeze, “and no matter what we will get through this. Together."

~~~~~*~~~~~

"What are you doing?" Clare asked as she walked from the bathroom to the bedroom to find Libby lying on her back on her bed with a pillow held over her face, groaning aloud. When Libby didn't respond straight away, Clare crossed the room and removed the pillow before repeating her question once again.

"My head..." Libby moaned as she reached out to grasp the pillow from Clare's hands and pull it back over her face.

"Another headache?"

"Uh-huh."

"Lib, these headaches are starting to scare me. I really think you need to see a doctor."

"Mhhnn…" Libby grunted in response, her voice muffled by the pillow. She lifted it slightly so that she could say, clearly, "you're as bad as Justin."

"That's because we’re worried about you. We don’t like seeing you in pain.”

“I can handle it,” Libby mumbled, removing the pillow slowly and peering at Clare through partly opened lids. “I just need to take—“

“Some more Tylenol?” Clare interrupted, her voice tinged with sarcasm. “You know, I’ve been hearing that a lot lately.”

“I’m handling it…”

"But you're not handling it, Libby. Look, you don't have to pretend around me. I know you are trying to protect Justin from this, but you can be honest with me. Are you sure that you don't want to just go home?"

"What?" Libby asked, her forehead creasing into a frown. "Of course not. Why would you think that?"

Clare hesitated, unsure of how to proceed. “I just thought that maybe you’d started to realise that you’d be better off at home. I mean, you’ve only been up and about for a few weeks; you can’t expect to maintain this hectic schedule for long. It’s okay to admit if you want to go home.”

"And do what?” Libby snapped back. “Sit around and wait for everyone to come home? You really think being at home by myself would be better for me? Feeling miserable and lonely?"

“You wouldn’t be lonely,” Clare argued, her heckles rising. “I’d go with you, and it’d be better than trying to pretend that everything is okay when it clearly isn’t.”

“So because you want to go home you’re trying to convince me that I should, too? Clare, I just got together with Justin. The last thing I want is to be three thousand miles away from him.”

"So you're doing this just for him? You're putting him above your health?"

Libby groaned aloud and wrapped her arms across her face to block out the light. She really didn't want to fight with Clare, especially not with a roaring headache. “No, of course not. But I’m not going home. If everyone would just get off my back and let me handle it…”

“By taking more and more painkillers each day? Libby, we share a bathroom; I can see how many blisters you’ve already gone through. There’s no way that is a healthy amount of medication to be taking.”

“I had a brain injury,” Libby reminded her curtly. “They clearly gave me that much medication for a reason. Someone obviously expected me to need to use it.”

Clare let out a huff of frustration; she wasn’t at all convinced by Libby’s words. She just didn’t seem to be getting through to her friend, and she only seemed to be annoying them both with her attempts.

“Well, I still think that you should go see a doctor. Even if it is just to be told that everything’s okay.” Even though it probably isn’t, Clare thought moodily.

“Fine. Thank you, your concerns have been noted,” Libby replied sarcastically. “Now can I please go back to sleep?”

~~~~~*~~~~~
"What’s this I hear about a modelling job?" Jamie asked Sara as they sat down together in the hotel’s restaurant to eat their breakfast.

Sara flashed a smile before popping a cube of ripe melon in her mouth. "News travels pretty fast around here, doesn’t it!” she said before chewing. She'd only casually mentioned the news to a few members of the group to sound out their opinions on her leaving the tour, but Jamie finding out suggested that the cat was fully out of the bag. Surprisingly, Sara wasn't that bothered. “Jason has managed to find me a small job on his next gig, and since it’s kinda a foot in the door I’ve decided to go for it.”

Jamie nodded and smiled—she already knew that part. "Congratulations! I'm surprised to hear that you wanna leave so soon and all though."

"I know, but it's kind of now or never scenario. If I don't take this opportunity they may never offer again, and as much as I obviously love working with the group, they know the choreography well enough. They don't need me to be here."

"Well if it's what you want then I'm really pleased for you," Jamie said as she took a mouthful of her own food. She tilted her head and met Sara's eyes before adding, "of course, we'll all miss you."

"I'll miss you all, too."

"When are you leaving?"

"Probably when we get to Liverpool. I've actually arranged for my college friend, Kat, to take over for me temporarily. She's agreed to fly out and meet us there."

"That's cool. So how does Nick feel about his girlfriend becoming a famous model?"

Sara snorted in amusement. "It's just a small job, Jam. But I think he's pretty excited for me. He's actually planning to fly out to meet us in London. We thought it might be a good time to meet up before I fly to Italy."

"Ah, bless him. What a sweetheart."

"Yeah, it'll be nice to see each other. Feels like it has been ages."

~~~~~*~~~~~

"Breakfast?" JC asked as he appeared around the open doorway of Clare and Libby's room and tapped tentatively on the wooden door. Clare glanced up and flashed him a smile from where she lay on her bed reading.

"Sure."

Clare sat upright and glanced across the room at the human shaped lump buried under the covers of Libby's bed before letting out a sigh. "She's asleep," she explained to JC as he met her eyes and raised a questioning eyebrow. "She took some more pills a half an hour ago and they seem to have finally kicked in."

"Is she doing okay?" JC asked as he and Clare quietly made their way out of the room and headed along the corridors of the hotel towards the elevator. As they waited for the cab to arrive at their floor, Clare filled him in on her concerns for Libby's health.

"I'm quite worried," she said. "She won't admit it, but something's not right."

"Headaches?"

"Yeah, bad ones. She thinks she's concealing it from me and Justin, but I know something's wrong. She's started being sick, and she's constantly popping pills. I keep finding empty packets hidden away in the bathroom. She refuses to let me take her to a doctor, and tells me off for fussing. It's really frustrating."

"She never has liked being told what to do," JC reminded her gently.

"I know, but there's a difference between being stubborn and being strong. She knows deep down that something's not right, but she's just burying her head in the sand. I kinda hoped that Justin might have had more of an influence over her," she shook her head at the thought and continued, her voice dripping in sarcasm, "but I guess not."

JC snorted with amusement. As if Libby would be happier taking orders from Justin than from her oldest friend. No doubt she’d have some choice words for them both. "She's a stubborn one," he admitted with a smile.

"Yeah, I just hope she comes to her senses soon,” Clare said sadly. She met JC’s eyes as the elevator door opened and not for the first time he saw the concern Clare felt for Libby in her eyes.

"Keep at it," he told her as they took a step forward into the car. He reached out and placed a comforting arm around her shoulder and gave her a slight squeeze. For once, Clare didn’t object and allowed him to keep his arm there until the doors closed behind them. "She'll come around,” he said. “You'll see."

~~~~~*~~~~~

"Libs?"

Justin lifted the corner of Libby's duvet and tried to peek in to see her face which was completely hidden from his view. As the sunlight began to filter in through the opening in her cocoon, Libby groaned and rolled over onto her other side to escape the light. "Wha?" she mumbled sleepily.

"Are you getting up soon?" Justin asked hopefully as he crouched down beside her bed. He was fully dressed and had his key card and wallet with him in eagerness to leave the hotel, but he’d been surprised to find that Libby hadn’t been waiting for him in the restaurant downstairs as they’d planned. After some careful deducting, he’d decided to look for her in her room and had been disheartened to find her still in bed.

Libby hesitated for a moment, and then in a croaky voice said, "no."

"No? Just no? 'cause I thought we we’re going to go get some lunch together and hang out for a bit. I haven’t got to be anywhere till this afternoon, remember?”

"Lunch?" Libby repeated to herself, already becoming more alert at the mention of the word.

"Yeah, or something else if you’d like." He raised his wrist and glanced down at his watch. "We’ve got till three if we want to do something." He regarded her once again and felt his hopes subside. “Or not…”

Libby considered this for a moment before flipping back over and lifting her eyes to meet his. Her grin said it all, and although she was still in pain, she was determined that it wasn’t going to stop her spending time with her boyfriend. Alone. At last.

"Just you and me?"

"Just you and me," Justin repeated. "Whaddya say?"

~~~~~*~~~~~

"Marmite and toast, really?" JC sniggered as Clare prepared to tuck into her breakfast. She glanced up at him through her lashes and tilted her head slightly to the side. Even his eyes were laughing at her.

"What's wrong with that?" She asked him, a barely suppressed giggle evident in her voice. JC immediately grinned at the sound. It'd been so long since he'd heard her laugh, and even longer since he'd been the cause of it that the sound filled him with a flush of happiness. It was early days, but they were already on track to becoming the fast friends they'd been before.

"It just doesn't look... edible," he said with a sneer at her food. "I can't imagine anyone wanting to eat that." Despite not wanting to offend her, his nose crinkled in disgust. To him even the smell was unappetising.

"That's because you're American. Us Brits eat this all the time when we get the chance."

"Is that right?" JC sniggered.

"Absolutely. Plus it's delicious."

"I sincerely doubt that," JC said with a laugh.

Silently, Clare picked up the slice of toast from her plate, and being careful not to get butter or Marmite on her sleeve, she tore off a corner and held it out across the table to him. "Here," she said, giving her hand a slight shake to encourage him. "Try it."

JC snorted at the idea. "Er, no thank you."

"Come on," Clare said with a roll of her eyes. "You call yourself adventurous and yet you won't try a local delicacy?"

"I've never said I was adventurous," he said, deadpan.

"Just try it, you might like it," Clare said with another shake of her hand.

"Or it might make me sick, and I'll have you to thank."

"It won't make you sick," Clare chastised him, "But if you're too much of a wuss to try it then suit yourself." Clare pulled her hand away and pouted playfully, knowing all too well how easy it was for her to manipulate JC with her most forlorn expression. She dropped the unwanted piece of toast onto her plate and stared at it sadly before batting her eyes at him. She'd missed being able to tease him like this. "I thought you might want to try it, but it's fine if you don't..."

"Alright,” he relented at last, “give me the damn toast!"

"Ha ha!" Clare chuckled, her face brightening instantly, "you're going to love it. Trust me."

~~~~~*~~~~~

"So we're just going to wait and see then?" Joey asked Lisa as they sat on a bed in his and Chris' hotel room and picked at their slowly cooling breakfast, which neither of them had particularly wanted. Joey had insisted that they order room service, although it had been more to do with him having something to do than through any real feelings of hunger. He doubted if he'd be able to eat anything again until the baby situation was resolved—his stomach was filled with anxious butterflies. 

Lisa had been grateful for Joey's understanding about her wanting to hide in his room for as long as possible. Her female friends knew her too well to not become suspicious if they saw the dried tear stains on her cheeks, or her swollen, red eyes. They'd no doubt interrogate her immediately, and she just wasn't ready for that. She wasn’t sure if she’d ever be ready for that. For now hiding away seemed to be the best option.

Only Sara knew what was going on, and she'd been sworn to secrecy which Lisa knew she would never break. Until her and Joey had made a decision on what they were going to do next, Lisa didn't want the news to spread any further.

"I guess..." Lisa replied wearily as she stared back at him. Her eyes were red-rimmed and her face pale after a sleepless night of tossing and turning. "I'm not sure I can even think straight right now."

"I'm sure we have time, Lis. You can't be that far along."

Lisa pulled a face. It’d been that very thought that had kept her awake all night. If she was pregnant, then when had she fallen pregnant? Could it really have been all those months ago when she'd first started feeling unwell? Had the sickness that she'd put down to a virus really been morning sickness? The thought made her heart race in her chest. If that were true, she could already be around eight weeks pregnant. Eight weeks!

Seeing Joey's panicked face and realising that once again she'd been internally monologuing her thoughts rather than speaking them aloud, Lisa said, "I don't know." She started to do the math in her head. "I started feeling unwell in early June, but then I haven't skipped a period in all that time... and I took a pregnancy test at the doctors which was negative..."

"So what does that mean?" Joey asked in a panic.

Lisa met his eyes and swallowed hard. "If it was a false negative, then I could have been pregnant all that time. I could have become pregnant in June."

Lisa watched the shock appear across Joey's face, and his eyes dropped immediately to the heavily patterned carpet. June. Shit.

"I didn't have any symptoms other than the sickness," Lisa said, her voice taking on a slightly hysterical tone. "I was feeling weak and tired a lot, but everyone feels crappy when they're being sick all the time. Plus, I'd done all that travelling for college... I just assumed that I'd picked up something on the road."

"But it could have been that sickness women get... you know, the pregnancy sickness thing."

"Morning sickness,” Lisa corrected him.

"Yeah. That"

Lisa inhaled a deep breath through her nose and let it out slowly. "Yeah, it could," she said after a pause. She met his eyes once again. "I swear, Joe. I didn't even consider the fact that I could've been pregnant. It was just too crazy to even consider. I mean, we're so careful..."

Joey nodded, but said nothing. His mind was too occupied with the thought of her already being eight weeks pregnant. Eight weeks! He didn't know very much about pregnancy or babies, but he was pretty sure that eight weeks was pretty far along. Especially to just be finding out that they were expecting.

"I think we should do another test," he said suddenly causing Lisa to jump slightly at the sound of his voice. She'd once again been consumed by her own thoughts and had almost forgotten that he was there. She met his eyes and raised her eyebrows. "We need to know for sure,” he said.”

"I agree," Lisa replied in a small voice. "There's no point panicking if there isn't a reason to panic. And if there is..."

"At least we'll know for sure. And then we can take it from there."

~~~~~*~~~~~

~~~~~*~~~~~

"Do you realise we've been sitting here for two hours?" Clare asked JC as she happened to glance at her wrist watch and noticed how much time had passed. Their food had long since been consumed and their plates cleared away, but JC and Clare had been so absorbed in their conversation they hadn't noticed the time passing.

"Really?" JC said as he pulled his cell phone out of the back pocket of his jeans and glanced at the digital display. "Jeez, you're right."

"Should we go?" Clare asked as she glanced sheepishly around the room to find it completely deserted. She was surprised the staff hadn't kicked them out ages ago. Or maybe they’d tried, but they just hadn’t noticed.

"What's the rush?" JC asked as she half lifted herself out of her seat and waited for him to follow suit. He didn't.

"Well, we can't stay here all day. Haven't you got things to do?"

"Not today. We don't have the sound check 'til three. Everyone else is off doing their own thing this morning."

"Oh," Clare replied as she lowered herself back into her chair.

"We could go do something if you'd like?" JC asked her and Clare smiled at the innocent look that appeared on his face. She had a feeling he was up to something. He had that kind of glint in his eye that usually tipped her off.

"We just had breakfast…” she mumbled. “Isn't that enough?"

"Come on, Clare. Neither of us likes hanging around hotel rooms for ages. Why don't you show me around your home town?"

Clare pulled a face but said nothing. She did like the idea of getting out of the hotel for a few hours. Unlike Libby she’d been more prepared for life on the road and had expected to spend most of her time sitting in the hotel room killing time. She’d bought her laptop with her for that very reason so at least she had something to do with her spare time.

"Can you do that? Is it a good idea?" Clare asked after a minute of consideration. She didn't want to sound too enthusiastic about spending time one-on-one with him. It was still such early days in their new friendship. Could she spend so much time with him without getting herself hurt again? He seemed genuinely interested in repairing the damage that had been done, but Clare couldn't help but feel she needed to take care.

"I don't see why not. Justin was talking about going shopping with Libby and I'm pretty sure that Chris and Jamie have gone out for lunch. I can always go back to the room and get a cap if you're worried?"

"I'm not worried,” she said. “I just thought you might be."

"Nah, I think I'm pretty safe. If the others are risking it then it must be okay."

~~~~~*~~~~~

Libby smiled as Justin reached out his hand for her to take as they prepared to cross the busy street. They'd spent a few hours shopping in the city centre of Birmingham and were now heading to a restaurant to get something to eat.

Although she still felt sleepy and slightly foggy thanks to all the pain medication that she’d taken, Libby was enjoying spending time alone with Justin. It was probably one of only a few times they’d spent together since she’d come out of the hospital.

Other than attending the outpatient appointments at the hospital with her, they’d only gone out for a few quick walks on the beach and gone to see a movie, which was about all that she’d managed to do at the time. The hospital had been right to suggest she keep her activity to a minimum as she'd found herself exhausted by the very minimum of effort.

Now her strength was returning, she was looking forward to being able to do more things together. She didn't want Justin to get fed up with her lack of stamina, particularly since he was such a live wire and rarely stayed still. He was a bundle of energy even on no sleep.

Libby glanced down at their conjoined hands and smiled fondly. How long she’d hoped for the time they might finally be a couple, and now here they were. She couldn’t believe it’d taken her so long to admit her feelings, and she wondered why it’d taken such an extreme wake up call to admit that she loved him.

At the time she’d thought she knew practically everything that there was to know about him, but each day he revealed new sides to himself that she had never seen before. She liked getting to know the real Justin–the one he kept to himself and only let a few selective people know. She felt lucky to be one of the people he let in.

"It's busy," Justin said as they reached the entrance of the restaurant they’d chosen to eat at. As she looked through the large floor to ceiling windows and noticed the crowds inside, Libby realised he was right. It was packed inside, and it wasn’t long before she noticed a long line of customers waiting in the doorway to be seated.

Libby couldn’t face waiting ages for food, or the inevitable noise inside. Since her accident she seemed even more sensitive to noise than usual, and she found even the slightest increase in volume when people spoke went straight through her. She knew Justin wouldn't want to be in the middle of a crowd either. Although he wasn't as famous in the UK as he was back home in the States, he was still likely to be recognised if he wasn't careful about where he went. The last thing he’d want would be to be followed around for the rest of the morning.

"Shall we go back to the hotel?" Libby asked as she glanced up at his face. He was wearing his baby blue baseball cap pulled low over his brow to try to hide his face, but Libby knew deep down that it wouldn't prevent the fans from recognising him if there were any around. Not many men in Birmingham were Tarheels fans.

"We could go somewhere else?" he suggested, lifting his head to scan the street for signs of less crowded restaurants. "You hungry?"

"Not really," Libby answered, "I'm not sure I could handle the crowds to be honest."

"How about the movies? We could get some snacks and hide in there for a bit?"

“That sounds like a great idea,” she said, grinning up at him. "Have you got time?"

Justin checked his watch. "Yeah, couple of hours. I’ve got till around three before I have to be at the sound check."

"Great," Libby said with another smile. "I know just what I want to see."

~~~~~*~~~~~

"So how about dinner?" JC asked as he and Clare made their way back to the lobby of the hotel. They made a beeline for the elevators, but JC was dragging his feet, trying to delay their inevitable separation.

"Are you serious?” Clare asked, turning to him and raising an eyebrow. The glint was back in his eyes and her suspicions rose once again. “Dinner? We've just had breakfast! Then we spent hours wandering around Birmingham city centre, and now you want to get some dinner together? Haven't you had enough?"

"Nope," JC said, flashing her a grin.

"You really probably should have had enough," Clare told him with a chuckle as she pressed the button on the wall that called the elevator cab down to their floor.

"Well, I haven't. So, dinner?"

Clare sucked in a breath as her heart began to pound. It sounded such an innocent suggestion, but she knew better. Already this afternoon they’d fallen back into the old ways of their friendship, teasing and poking fun of each other in a playful, affectionate way. It was so easy and relaxed, but Clare knew the minute the sun set and the evening descended, things would be different. Everything was always heightened at night time.

"I guess…" Clare said hesitantly, biding her time, "before the show?"

"Yeah, it'll be too late to go somewhere afterwards."

“Why don’t we get some dinner here? I'm pretty sure they serve food downstairs until around eleven thirty. Or if not, there's always room service?"

"No,” JC said firmly.

"No? Just no?"

"I want to go out somewhere."

"Okay… why?"

"Come on, Clare. We haven't gone out for dinner together in ages."

"We've never gone out for dinner together," Clare chuckled as she eyed him suspiciously. He was definitely up to something. "We've gone out as a group but never just us two."

"Then it's long overdue. I'll handle the plans, you just be ready. I've got the sound check till around half four, so I'll come by and pick you up from five? Sound good?"

Clare smirked at the enthusiasm in his voice. "Yeah, sounds good."

~~~~~*~~~~~

"So, what's going on, Josh?" Clare asked as she glanced up from the menu she was holding to look at him. It hadn’t been lost on her that he’d dressed up, and she smiled at the effort he was putting in to show her he was sorry.

"What do you mean?" he asked innocently as thumbed through the menu, avoiding meeting her eyes but keeping a knowing smirk on his lips.

"Well, first breakfast… and then shopping, which I know you hate. And now early dinner? Not to mention the fact you’re wearing a tie. What's that about?"

JC self-consciously smoothed his tie down with his hand and looked up at her, his cheeks flushing slightly with embarrassment. "You don't like it?" he asked in a concerned voice.

"You're wearing a tie. It's weird."

"Why is it weird?” he asked. “You've seen me dressed up before."

"Yes, but for award ceremonies not for dinner with a friend. Which brings me back to my main question-what's going on?"

"You're so suspicious. Perhaps I just felt like dressing up?" he teased, his eyes sparkling at her.

"So you're telling me after spending two hours doing a sound check, you decided to come back here and dress up all fancy, even though you have a show in about…" she glanced at her watch, "…two hours? Come on, Josh. I know you. If you aren't wearing a t-shirt and jeans, or even sweatpants, something is wrong."

"I resent that comment. I have a very colourful wardrobe."

"Of t-shirts and sweatpants, yeah,” Clare teased, her eyes crinkling around the edges.

He paused, clearly gathering his thoughts before speaking. “What can I say? I'm trying to make an effort.”

"I can see that,” Clare said. “I just don't understand why. You don't have to dress up for me, JC..."

"I want to. You're worth it, Clare."

Clare lowered her menu and regarded him carefully. "Is this about last night? Look, I know you took to heart what happened on my date, but it’s not something you have to compensate for. I'm okay about it.” She maintained eye contact, ensuring he understood that her words came from the heart. “Honestly."

"Don't think about it like that,” he said. “This is just having dinner with a friend. A good friend. A friend who knows exactly—"

"Yeah, okay. I get it,” Clare laughed. “It's totally about last night. Look it's very sweet of you to arrange this dinner and to dress up as though it’s a proper date, but I thought I made it clear last night that I didn't want to rush into anything."

"See, this is where we differ. I don't think of this as rushing into anything. You want things to go back to the way they were, well, I think we were always verging on the edge of going out on a date. I'm just nudging us in the right direction.

“That’s not nudging,” she chuckled, “that’s full on shoving.”

JC laughed good-naturedly. "Fine, perhaps I'm being a bit pushy, but can you honestly say that you mind? Wouldn't you have told me if you didn't want to come out tonight?"

Clare considered for a moment. He was probably right. "Yes," she replied honesty, "I suppose I would have."

"So can we call it a date?" JC asked with a winning grin on his face.

"Calm down, Casanova. Let's just see how it goes, shall we?"

~~~~~*~~~~~