A Million Faces in a Crowd
Chapter 23.

Opening the door to his car, JC helped Carly slid in carefully. Once she was secure, he ran around to the driver side and climbed in. He looked over at her, her face still slightly pale as she leaned back against the seat. Starting his car, he finally pulled away from the hospital entrance.

The radio played softly and filled the silence that took over the car. He had so much to say but had no idea where and when to begin, he only knew that now was not the time. JC was just thankful Carly had made it out of surgery alright and was on the road to recovery. He smiled, remembering how she had argued when he suggested she come stay with him until he had become more adamant, insisting until finally in her drug induced state, she gave in. He refused to let her go back to the hotel she had planned to stay at and be all alone, knowing she’d be in much better care with him. It helped JC out a little when the doctor had interject the conversation and suggested it’d be good for Carly to stay with someone while she recovered.

“You doing okay?” JC asked softly, looking over at her.

She kept her eyes closed but nodded. He reached over and easily grabbed her hand, taking it in his and rubbing her fingers over her knuckles. Her skin still felt a little cold but it was better than nothing. JC just wanted to feel her somehow. He’d have to wait until they got home, and a lot longer before he got a chance to dig a little deeper.

**

He helped her up the steps and into his house, taking them slowly and in small steps. When they finally made it into the living room, JC helped make her comfortable on the couch. He had insisted she lay down in his bedroom but she had refused, covering it up with the fact that the couch was much closer. It only seemed to be getting worse. Lifting her legs, he settled her so she was laying down and then covered her with a light blanket. When he reached down to place a kiss on her lips, she turned her head, making him kiss her cheek. JC’s face sunk a little, the pain hitting him deep. She was still trying to push him away.

“Need anything?”

Carly shook her head. “No. I think I’m Ok. Thanks though.”

He nodded, squatting down so he was at her level. “Alright. Just let me know if you do. Remotes right here. I’m going to go jump in the shower real quick, okay?”

“Kay. I’m just going to sleep.” she said weakly.

JC smiled, finding it odd to see her weak and vulnerable. “That’s what you need, honey.”

And with that he left the room.

When he came back minutes later, Carly was fast asleep with the TV on. He readjusted her covers, wanting to make sure she was comfortable. Feeling the need to be close to her, he sat down at the end of the couch, carefully placing her feet in his lap. For now, that would do.

***

JC stirred, coming out of slumber and immediately sitting upright, not realizing her had dozed off. He turned to his left, seeing Carly sitting up sleepily, looking confused and in pain. He ran a quick hand over his face, quickly becoming awake.

“You alright?” He asked, his voice thick with sleep.

She looked up through heavy eyes. “I’ve gotta use the bathroom.”

JC nodded, standing up and helping her ease out of the couch. “Easy, honey. Small steps.” JC urged.

Carly groaned, doing her best to stand up straight, trying not to need his help but she was weak. “This sucks.”

Smiling warmly, he helped her into the bathroom down the hall from the living room. “I know it does, Carly. You’ve just got to get better.”

She nodded, turning to stare at him, waiting for him to leave. He looked at her confused. “I can take it from here.”

“Are you sure? I can help you--.”

“Dammit Jace, I can pee by myself.”

Taken aback by her outburst, he stepped back, letting her do her business. “Fine. I don’t know what you’re so worried about. I’ve seen it all before.”

Carly rolled her eyes. “That’s different.” she grumbled.

“How is that different?” JC arched a brow.

“We were… things were just different.”

His heart immediately sank. She was putting her wall up once again and it stung like hell. Was she saying they weren’t together anymore or that she just wanted some privacy? For some reason, fear shot through his veins. He wondered what was making her act like this even though he has just proved himself too her within the last three days.

Apparently that wasn’t enough.

He made sure Carly didn’t miss the pained look on his face. She had to know she was ripping him to shreds. “Whatever. I’ll be just outside if you need me.”
Carly nodded, as she slowly shut the door.

JC waited outside, true to his word and wasn’t the least bit surprised when he heard her yelp out in pain, minutes later.

“Carly?”

Instead of a reply, all he got as a gasp. One that he had come to learn was her way of covering up the pain she was really feeling. Knocking twice on the door, he turned the knob. Coming to her side, where she stood at the sink, he took in her hunched over body and the shorts she had on pooled at her ankles.

“I can’t fucking bend over.” She cursed.

JC bit back his chuckle, having never heard her curse like that but figured it was a mix of the strong painkillers she was on, not to mention the frustration of being held still, which she wasn’t use to.

He decided against a joking around with her, knowing his words could easily cause another outburst. Instead, he leaned down, bringing her shorts up her slim legs and around her waist. “It’s not that big of deal.”

“I can’t even go to the damn bathroom myself JC. This sucks. I don’t know how to sit still.”

“You’ll have to learn, Carly. You just had surgery and have stitches.” he said softly as he helped guide her out of the bathroom.

“Thank you captain obvious.” She snapped back.

He brought her back to the couch, settling her once again. “You’ve got to be starving. Can I make you anything?”

Carly crumbled. “I’m not hungry.”

JC gave her a stern look. “Then you’re not getting anymore pain killers. Your doctor said you have to eat if you take them.”

She rolled her eyes. “Fine. Crackers or toast or something.”

JC nodded, disappearing into the kitchen. “Comin’ right up.”

He returned a few minutes later, carrying a tray of toast with her favorite kind of jelly, some apple sauce and a small cup of jello.

“Eat up, babe.”

“Thanks.” She said before reaching for the toast.

JC nodded in approval, excusing himself.

***

Reaching for his cell phone that vibrated obnoxiously in his pocket, he answered it before it stopped.

“Hello?”

“JC, it’s Matt. They need you down here to sign some stuff.”

“I can’t right now, man. I’ve got to stay home with Carly.”

“She’s there?” Matt asked, confused.

“Yeah. She’s been in the hospital for the past three days. She had her appendix removed.”

“But I thought--.”

JC interjected quickly. “Long story. Don’t ask. I’ll explain later.”

“Um, alright. You really can’t leave?”

“No. I’m staying put. She needs me here.”

“You know this might put a damper on things right?”

JC ran a hand through his hair growing frustrated. Right now, signing with a record label was the least from his worries. “I’m sorry, Matt. I won’t leave her alone.”

Matt sighed on the other end, obviously frustrated. “Ok. I guess I’ll be in touch.”

He nodded, even though he knew no one could see him. “I’m sorry. I’ve just gotta do this.”

“I know, Jace. See ya.”

The line went dead and JC stared at his cell phone for a moment before dropping it back into the pockets of his sweats. It almost made him laugh to think that he was passing up important meetings to sign legal documents that could make or break his musical career. The JC ten years ago would have dropped everything, girlfriends included just to be where he needed to be for his job because he was a perfectionist and his life revolved around his music. He almost looked at it as growth because even though music was still a big part of his life, Carly had become an even bigger part. He just wished he knew why it was her that was different. It was like she was filling that void he never knew existed. Now, all he had to do was convince her too. It seemed easy enough right?

***
By the time he hung up the phone, he realized it was getting dark and most of the day was already gone.

Walking back into living room, JC was pleased to see Carly had nibbled all of her toast away, minus the crust but was happy she had finally ate.

“How’s the toast?” He asked, taking a seat beside her.

She looked over at him and nodded. “It’s good. Thanks again.”

He winked casually, trying to keep the mood light. “You’re welcome baby. Need anything else??”

“Maybe some more pain meds in a little bit.”

“That I can do. You going to try to sleep more?”

Carly rolled her eyes at him. “No. I’ve slept. I’m already so sick of this. Who was on the phone?”

He patted her foot that was covered by a light blanket. “You’ve got to rest to get better, honey. And how did you know I was on the phone?”

“I’ve rested. I don’t know how to do that for more than a day or two. It’s pissing me off though. And I heard you talking.”

“It was nothing. Just Matt.”

“Oh, you need to work on something with him?”

“No. It’s fine. I want to be here with you.”

She eyed him curiously. “I’m a big girl, JC.”

“I know you are, Carly. Stop worrying and get better.”

Rolling her eyes, she shifted. “Why don’t you let me go finish Gavin’s stuff for Max?”

“It’s been done.” JC said, looking away. He could tell she was itching for a fight.

“What? By who?” She yelled.

“Calm down, Carly. I called Max when you were in surgery. He got someone else to finish it up. Believe it or not, I was pretty damn close to being done before you woke up and got sick the other night so stop stressing. It’s not good for you.”

“There goes my career.”

JC looked at her, a little shocked. “Oh, you’re welcome, Carly.”

She rolled her eyes. “And what’s that mean?”

Throwing his hands in the air, JC became frustrated by her attitude. He wasn’t used to this side of her. “Oh I don’t know. How about thank you for busting your balls to come help me finish someone else’s errors so you weren’t stuck in the studio for days. Or how about thanks for being there for me when I was sick even though you hadn’t called your boyfriend for weeks, making him worry about where in the hell our relationship was going or what he did. Or how about calling Max and covering for you so your job is perfectly fine?  Perhaps thank you for loving me even though I’ve been nothing but rude and short tempered and snappy with a man who loves the hell out of me.”

Carly stood there, eyes wide with surprise by his anger. She’d never seen him get upset like that and it took all of her willpower to stop her jaw from hitting the floor. Still she couldn’t talk, couldn’t move. The only thing she did was sit there, silently while she though of the right words. Even she was surprised when her eyes began to well up a little. “I’m sorry.” she whispered.

JC shook his head, not even choosing to accept her apology like that. It didn’t even mean anything to him in the heat of the moment. Instead, he chose to walk away and maybe let his words sink in a little.

“Whatever. I’m going to bed.” He said as he got up to leave without giving her a chance to reply.

Carly could only stare at the place next to her that he had now vacated.

**

JC woke, not even an hour later, staring aimlessly at his ceiling. He knew he’d never be able to sleep knowing Carly was out in the living room and that she might need him. He felt like a jerk for his outburst but was thankful it finally happened at the same time. He needed a release and to let her know all of the things he’d really been feeling. There may not have been an act of making up and he still had no idea where things were headed but it felt good that maybe now, he had put the thoughts in her head.

He tossed several more times before tossing the covers off of him and exiting his empty bed and walked towards the living room. The house was completely dark until he got closer, seeing she had left one of the lamps on. He wanted to check on her without her knowing he was actually checking on her. To his surprise, as he got closer into the room, her movements seemed to increase. Maybe she was awake.

“Jace?” Carly whispered, her voice strained.

“Yeah it’s me.”

He heard her sigh, and figured she was most likely in pain. Suddenly he felt like a jerk.

“Can you get me a pain pill, please?”

“Yeah, sure.” He said as he moved towards the kitchen grabbing them and a glass of water in a hurry. He was by her side, seconds later, taping one of the pills into the palm of her hand.

“Thanks.” she said, swallowing the pill with the water he’d handed her.

“Is it bad?”

Carly shifted a little, trying not to show pain. “It’s fine.”

He wanted so badly to reach out and pull her into his arms but right now that just wasn’t possible. Still he could see her mood and attitude had changed considerably.

“Need anything else?”

“A hug?” Carly asked softly.

He looked down at her in surprise, wondering if he’d really heard her right.

“Seriously?” He asked, wanting to be sure.

“Mmmhmm.”

Leaning down in front of the couch, he stood on his knees before taking her small frame in his, cautious not to hurt her. It might not be as close as he wanted but it still felt good all the same. It had been way too long since he’d held Carly. He took his time, letting the soft feel of her sink into him, absorbing all of her that he could. The scent of her overtook him, reminding him of all the little things that made her who she was, and who he loved. When she laid her head on his shoulder, he slowly ran a hand up her back, smiling as she purred contently as she always had. Maybe there was some hope.


“I’m sorry.” She whispered. Pulling back, but not fully pulling away all together, JC could have swore he was hearing things. Carly must have known because she repeated it again. “I’m sorry I’m such a bitch to you.”

“Hey, I never said that.”

She shrugged, tears sliding out of nowhere from her eyes. “But I was.”

JC let out a deep breath that he’d been holding too long and suddenly it was a little easier to breathe. Maybe his outburst had done some good.

“Wanna come to bed with me, Carly?” He wanted to hold her for real. Not hunched over the couch, trying not to hurt her if he moved slightly.

“I um--okay.”

Surprised, JC stood up, pulling the covers off of her and watching her cringe as she tried to swing her legs off of the couch. Deciding to make this process easy, he took matters into his own hands. He leaned down in front of her once again.

“Put your arms around my neck.” he instructed.

When she did as she was told, he took her legs and draped them over his arms, lifting her up against his chest. He was pleased to see she didn’t groan in pain as he walked through the house and into the bedroom, carefully depositing her on the bed. Going around to his side, he joined her.

“You alright?”

She turned to him, smiling softly with what little glow came from the TV that he been on but muted. “Yeah. Thanks.”

“You’re welcome.”

She looked down and took note of the space between them and suddenly felt a loss. Usually the times she’d spent in this bed, Carly was curled tightly against JC, spooned together like lovers often lay.

“You can come closer, if you want.”

Not thinking twice, he moved over, cautiously enveloping her in his arms. It felt like heaven.

Letting out a sigh, JC smiled to himself. “I’ve missed this.”

Carly turned towards him, running her hand through his thick waves. “Me too. I’m sorry again Jace. I didn’t mean to be like this.”

He nodded. “Apology accepted. I know I started all of this by coming to London. I shouldn’t have stepped on your toes even though Max asked me too. Gavin’s album was your thing.”

She looked at him seriously. “You’re right. You shouldn’t have but I can see from the musical stand point why you did. I just feel like you came because of what I told you happened with Gavin.”

“Baby, Gavin had nothing to do with this. I was asked way before you even told me that happened. I will admit though that it made me feel better to be close to you after I did. I can’t help but to want to make sure you’re alright.”

“Jace, you have to understand I’m a big girl. You were hovering like crazy which I just cannot stand. I’m too independent to have a babysitter breathing down my neck, watching my every step with Gavin. Trust is really big to me and it needs to be with you also.”

Grabbing her hand, he laced their fingers together. “I do trust you, Carly. It’s him I don’t trust.”

She laughed a little. “Same thing, slick.”

JC groaned. “I promise I’ll work on it. You have to understand that my ex did damage to me. I don’t want to be that jealous guy that’s constantly breathing down your neck. I honestly didn’t think I’d be with someone again after I’d been dragged through the ringer. When I met you, all of that changed for me. I fell in love with you and I was gone and all of those male instincts just came out.”

Turning more into him, Carly’s hands traced his t-shirt covered chest, his arms, his shoulders before landing around his neck, feeling the hair at the base. “I know you have built in male instincts but you have to learn that I’m not your ex. I felt smothered Jace. I was burnt out, flying here to there, trying to be the best producer I could be, all the while trying to be the best girlfriend. In the end, it was me you didn’t trust. I could say the same for you. You go to a lot more parties and functions than I do.”

“I’ve never once touched another woman since I’ve met you.” he said adamantly.

“And I’ve never once touched or looked at another man the way I do with you.”

“So I’m the jealous arrogant, asshole of a boyfriend. I get it.”

He didn’t expect her to laugh right then but she did. It was like an airy and a breath of fresh air to the Carly he had missed. “You’re not an asshole, Jace. You’ve just got to work on things.”

“Ok. I can do that. That still doesn’t explain why you didn’t call. I had no idea what was going on, where you were. It seriously scared me, Carly. I don’t think you realize how much I love you.”

She looked a little guilty then, bringing her hands down to rest between them. “I needed time to think. I told you I was burnt out. I wanted to go home, re-evaluate life and not be wanted by someone or pulled in another direction.”

JC nodded in understanding. “But you could have told me that. Leaving London and then not taking my calls to at least let me know..”

“I let you know I was fine, Jace.”

“It’s not the same.” He whispered softly.

“I can’t go back and change it. I can only move forward. I’ll remember that next time.”

JC looked at her sternly. “There won’t be a next time. I hate fighting with you.”

“Babe, we’re going to fight. We’re going to have dumb arguments. It’s kind of inevitable.”

Feeling suddenly defeated, he dropped his head to her shoulder, breathing her in and just content with feeling her. “You’re right. I’m sorry for being an ass and coming to London. I should have stayed out of everything.”

Carly shivered. “You said that already.”

“And you haven’t said if I was forgiven.”

She laughed a little. “I’m deciding.”

“Oh?” His nose grazed the dip in her neck eliciting another shiver from her.

“Yes.” she didn’t move.

“Well while you’re deciding, could I please do something?” he asked, eyes coming up to meet hers.

“And what’s that, Jace?”

His face lay in front of hers, far enough away to make out every feature of her face and for her to do the same for him. When his nose bumped with hers, he pulled back again, smiling slightly. “Can I please….”

She arched up against him, as much as her body would allow in it’s sore state. Her hands went to rest on his biceps as he curved against her, one of his legs coming to rest between her one without actually being on top of her. “Hmmm?” Carly hummed.

“Kiss you?” he finished, with a soft puff of air against her face. “It’s been too damned long.”

Her hands moved up, running through his hair as she pretended to think. “Yes, please. It’s killing me too.”

It wasn’t a second longer before his lips came down on hers, soft and warm. He tasted her lips until it wasn’t enough, and his tongue began pushing at the seem. When she allowed him entrance, he still kept it slow and sweet, tasting and nibbling, reuniting their breaths as one. When he pulled away, her eyes were heavy and clouded, meeting his as her hands rested in his hair. His thumbs traced her bottom lip before coming down once again and capturing them in one more sweet caress.

“I love you, Carly. So much.” He whispered, against her.

“I love you too, Jace. So much.”

He climbed off of her carefully, coming to lay on his side, scooting up to lay against her, arms going easily around her body as her head rested against his chest. Pulling the covers up, he covered them, noticed she was fighting sleep. Several minutes passed by with nothing but the sounds of even breathing filled the room. JC had assumed she was already asleep with the help of the pain medicine she had taken until her voice interjected his restless mind.

“Jace?”

“Hmm?” he hummed against her shoulder.

“Thank you for taking care of me and putting up with me. You really are a good guy.”

He tired not to chuckle, accepting the compliment. “You’re welcome baby.”

JC didn’t question it, deciding that the pain killers were probably doing the job of making her sleepy and vulnerable. He wondered if it was them that had something to do with her sudden change in attitude or if this was all real. She was the old Carly again-loving, kind, passionate. Not wanting to think that she could avert back to her old ways in the morning, JC kissed the side of her head before leaning back and closing his eyes, finally hoping to find slumber. Not everything was fixed at the moment and it’d most likely be a while before it was, but he felt like the first hurdle was jumped. She still loved him and she did it with trust while sleeping in his arms as she once had.