It has been five days now. Five days since Arianna were last open. Five days since she last smiled at me. Five days since I last heard her voice. Five days since I was last able to hold her in my arms. Five days since I last heard a sarcastic remark from her, saw her roll her eyes, and laugh at something. It has been five days since I sat down beside her and refused to leave other than to pee or shower for a quick five to ten minutes.

Chase and Tabbetha have been so kind and generous to me. They brought me a bag of my clothes to change into, although I’m sure that was more for them than me so they won’t have to smell me and my old dirty clothes. They don’t make me leave so they can have time with her alone. We finally convinced the doctor to bend the rules again and allow four people in the room so we don’t have to worry about taking turns.

Five days!! I’m going crazy. Every time I hold her hands and feel her twitch, I get a hopeful excitement but the nurse continues to assure me that there’s no change. They are just reflexes. She then proceeds to put more drugs into her IV; I think they are trying to keep her from waking up.

Why?! Why would they do that? Do they not see what this is doing to me, to us? Why has three months driven me insane over this girl? Here I am on the fifth day, sitting by myself, refusing to leave this girl’s side and I’ve been with her for a little over three months and have known her for not much longer than that.

I grab her hand and kiss the back of it once again. “You drive me crazy.” I say out loud, laughing a small bit to myself at the line I just used as I picture an old video my old bandmates and I had made. “I’m officially insane.” I mumble as I lie my head down on the bed, still holding her hand.

I’m alone right now for Chase and Tabbetha are in the cafeteria eating some lunch, and James is who knows where off doing business. I hope off somewhere killing the guy who is responsible for this is the thought that goes through my mind and just as the thought crosses my mind I felt Arianna twitch again.

“You agree too huh?” I ask out loud as if she is responding to my inner thoughts and I receive another twitch in return. “I really wish you’d just say so then. Twitching is such a tease,” I tell her without lifting my head from where it lies on the bed beside the hand that I continue to hold.

This time the twitch actually turns into more of a grab than a twitch. She grabbed my hand! I am sure it is another hopeless reflex but I did not care. I reach up and smooth some of her hair back off her face. I simply run my fingers over her forehead and cheek and just hope I can will her awake. She grabs my hand again a little harder and just as I look up at her eyes, they fly open – almost panic-like. Her eyes are full of fear and confusion. I immediately push the emergency button above her bed to get some doctors, nurses, or whoever in here as I try to talk to her.

“Arianna, baby, you’re awake. Oh thank goodness. I was so worried. You’re ok.” I tell her. “You were shot several times but we got you to this hospital and they were able to save you.” I know what I was saying sounded very child-like as I try to explain things to her.

She just looked around trying to place everything. Several nurses and doctors rush into the room. I stand back and watch as they all hover over her and check her vitals and several nurses leave and return several times, bringing in things they apparently need. I use this time to make a short phone call to Chase to tell him that Arianna is awake.

“Arianna, I’m going to need you to take a deep breath and breathe out for me on three. I’m going to remove this tube that’s in your throat.” I hear the doctor explain as he followed by counting to three.

ARIANNA

I open my eyes to see Justin sitting over me. I look around the room I am in and see nothing familiar. I see his lips moving as if he is talking to me, but I cannot comprehend anything he is saying. It does not take long for doctors and nurses to come flooding in around me checking on things. I look around for Justin but do not see him; they must have pushed him to the back. The doctor comes over and explains to me that he is going to remove the awful uncomfortable tube that feels like it is running all the way down to my toes.  I’m sure it is one of those stupid breathing tubes you see in movies. Go figure I would one day need one.

As the doctor gently pulls the tube out, I start to gag and choke on it. I lie there wanting and wishing everyone I do not know would just get out and leave me alone. A doctor and his nurse check and record my vitals and try to talk to me.

“Please, go away.” I get out with a very quiet and scratchy voice.

“Miss, we need to make sure everything is okay.” The doctor tries explaining to me.

“No. Get out.”

After I refuse to cooperate and Justin finally demands, the medical staff leaves the room. Justin moves back over to my bedside with a huge smile, leaning down to kiss me on the forehead. “I was so worried you wouldn’t wake up.” He whispers to me.

“You can’t get rid of me that easily.” I try to joke but I cough instead. My mouth and throat are dry and sore.

Justin obviously realizes this for he gets me a glass of water and helps me sit up enough to drink some. I thank him as I lie back down. I try to push myself up into a sitting position but I am too weak and not to mention it hurt like hell to move. Justin helps me once again. “You really should rest.” He tells me pointedly.

“I should do a lot of things that I don’t, like avoid getting shot.” I smile over at him.

“Not funny at all. You really did scare me. Seeing you lie there in a pool of so much blood and I couldn’t even get to you. Then there’s the fact that it’s a miracle you lived through this at all.” He is upset. The watery eyes are giving that fact away.

“How long have I been out?”

“Five days.”

“Damn! That’s one hell of a nap!” I exclaim. I don’t do soft emotional moment too well I you can’t tell.

Justin rolls his eyes at my comment. “I was going crazy. This whole situation has opened my eyes to a few things.” He informs me with a serious look. He sits down in the chair beside my bed and leans close to me. I give him a confused look and he continues on, “I thought I had lost you so soon after we became something. I know we have only been together for a short time, but this has let me see one true thing.” He babbles on. What in the world are you talking about? “I just want to say that I –“

“I thought I heard the nurses talking about you.” James interrupts. He walks over to side opposite of Justin and leans down to give me a hug and a kiss on the forehead. “I’m so glad you have finally come back to join us. Enjoy your nap, slacker.” He smiles at me with a small wink.

“Oh Angel, my dear Angel, thanks for having perfect timing.” I tell him as I grab his hand with my free one and smile up at him. “I thought I could handle the lackeys but I was obviously wrong.” I tell him.

“You called me Angel.” His huge smile shows practically all of his teeth. “You never call me that.” He is exited over something so retarded.

“I think you’ve earned it, for a short time at least.”

I look back over at Justin and his face is scrunched up and a frown has replaced the smile that was there just minutes ago. “What’s wrong, Justin? What were you going to say when you were interrupted?” I ask him.

He shakes his head looking down at his hands. “It’s nothing”

JUSTIN

I was just about to tell her I love her, but of course we are interrupted by James. James, who seems to butt in at the worst time every time, interrupted us and she called him ‘Angel’. Why? I’m the one who called him and I am the one who carried her to get her here. Obviously I feel more for her than she does me. I tell her nothing and I excuse myself as James once again takes over my place.

I go out in the hall and lean against the wall and slide down to the floor. I’m in too far and I don’t know where to go from here. I feel like I should get out and leave now but I don’t want to and I don’t think I could even if I did. I’m not in the hall for but a minute when I hear Chase and Tabbetha running over.

“Justin! What are you doing out here? I figured you would be in there with her especially now that she is awake considering you refused to leave her before.” Tabbetha squats down beside me.

I could tell she wanted to be inside, yet she chooses to talk to me. “I just think she wants some time with James – or he so-called Angel.” I tell her sadly. “I’ve been monopolizing her for the past five days, so I should give others time.”

“Justin, don’t be jealous of James. He’s a complete shithead. They are over with.” She tries to assure me.

“If you say so, I just want to be out here for a second. I’ll be back in about one minute.” I tell her with a small smile.

She nods and her and Chase go inside the hospital room and greets their friend with a squeal from Tabbetha.

I want to believe what Tabbetha has told me, but it is so hard for me to do. For the three months that we have been together, she always answers his phone calls no matter what she is doing. She frequently leaves me behind to go fulfill his stupid wishes. I try to understand her ‘jobs’ but I cannot understand her and James.

I pull myself off the floor and go back into the room before my absence becomes a topic of discussion. Chase is standing there over his friend with Tabbetha. They are talking about things she missed and things she owes Tabbetha when she gets out. James stood on her other side still holding her hand smiling. He turns to me when I walk in and gives me a smirk that makes me want to hit him so hard. I just stand there at the foot of the bed and watch the interactions, wishing that I was alone with her again.