Unwanted Interruption
"So, you just got this weird feeling?" Trace asked as he looked up from his pile of papers.
"Yeah. . . This weird. . . warm. . . jello-ish feeling." Trace looked at him, confused by his words.
"Jello-ish?" Justin sighed and rolled his eyes. There was no other way to describe it. He knew that Trace had a right to be confused, hell, he was confused by it himself. But he wanted someone to just get it.
"It was like pride, man. This whole sense of pride."
"What the hell were you so proud of?" Trace asked while shifting absentmindedly through the pile again, despite the fact that he had forgotten what he was in search of in the first place.
"I don't know. . ." He paused and thought for a moment, "Making her smile." Trace halted his actions and stared at his friend who was grinning at him dreamily.
"Making her smile?" Justin nodded, "You do that all the time."
"I know. That's the problem. Why in the hell should those smiles be any different from that one?"
"I don't know, man." Trace sighed, "Have you ever felt that way before?" Justin froze the moment he completed his question. Had he ever felt like that before? Yes, with Felicia and with Britney. But he had been in love with them.
"Well yeah, but that was when I was in love with Brit and Felicia." Justin answered after a moment. Trace smiled.
"Well I guess we know what that means," Trace concluded, "Dude, you're in l-"
"Don't even." Justin stated abruptly, "There's just no way." He began to fidget with his fingers nervously.
"Says who?" Trace smiled, "You should be happy. Love is in the air, and it's about time you took a big ass whiff of it." Justin glared at him.
"I don't need to take a whiff of anything, thank you very much." Justin snapped defensively. Trace stared at him for a moment before putting his hands up in surrender.
"Touchy, touchy." he stated jokingly, "No need to get feisty." Justin rolled his eyes and sighed. He was angry because he was confused. He was confused because he was frustrated and he was blowing steam off by yelling at Trace.
"I'm sorry, man." Justin apologized, "Everything's just so complicated right now."
"I know. Managing your solo career while trying to get a relationship to work is a lot to have on your plate." Justin nodded.
"You don't think it's too soon?" he asked suddenly.
"Is what too soon?"
"Love, Trace. Love." Justin watched as his friend shrugged before smiling.
"If there's anything I know about love, it's that it has no time setting." Justin laughed, "You know better than I do that when I met Elisha, I wasn't expecting to fall for her as quickly as I did. But you've got to remember that even though love may come when you feel it's too soon, it only happens when you're ready for it." Justin looked up and grinned at Trace.
"Damn, man, that was deep." Trace laughed and shrugged.
"What can I say? I'm as deep as it gets." His demeanor changed from playful to serious, "So when are you going to tell her?" Justin sighed and smiled weakly.
"I forgot about that part," He rubbed the back of his neck, "I don't know. Sometime soon I guess."
"You guess?"
"Trace. . ." Justin whined sadly. He was scared. She could hurt him. Terribly. Make him crumble into shambles. Just like Britney. Just like Felicia. He was afraid she'd end up just like them. A cheater. A heart breaker. A 'destroy Justin's world' girlfriend.
If I fell in love with you
Would you promise to be true
And help me understand
"It's okay you know." Trace cooed. Justin looked up at him in confusion.
"What?"
"To be afraid."
'Cause I've been in love before
And I found that love was more
Than just holding hands
"I shouldn't be afraid though." Justin concluded, "She wouldn't hurt me, right?" Trace shrugged.
"Who knows?"
If I give my heart to you
I must be sure
From the very start
That you would love me more than her
"Way to be positive, Trace." Justin commended bitterly.
"Well what do you want me to tell you? That she won't hurt you?" Justin shrugged.
"It would help."
"What happen if she does hurt you?" Trace argued, "I'd be the horrible, lying friend.
"I get it." Justin agreed, "But I'm more scared of her rejecting me. If I think it's too soon, Alonsha will be running for cover the moment the word 'love' escapes my lips."
"You'll never know unless you tell her." Trace shot back. Justin nodded. He had a point.
If I trust in you oh please
Don't run and hide
If I love you too oh please
Don't hurt my pride like her
"But it would really suck if she did reject me." Justin complained.
"It would really, really suck if she felt the same way and you never told her how you felt."
'Cause I couldn't stand the pain
And I would be sad if our new love was in vain
"You really want me to tell her, don't you?" Justin asked jokingly.
"It's not about what I want. This is something you have to do for yourself." Trace smiled, "But you have to admit to your feelings first."
"What are talking about?"
"Say it, man." Trace pressured, "Say that you love Alonsha." Justin cleared his throat and licked his lips.
"I love Alonsha."
So I hope you see that I
Would love to love you
And that she will cry
When she learns we are two
"See. . ." Trace grinned happily, "How did that feel?"
Justin smiled before answering, "That felt kinda. . . good." Trace laughed and Justin smiled, "I love Alonsha Claire Daniels. I love my chocolate little Milk Dud." Trace laughed heartily.
"I really don't want to know." Justin smiled, something that he couldn't control at the moment.
"I'm in love, man." Justin proclaimed, "I'm really in love."
If I fell in love with you
-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-
"1. . .2. . .3. . ." I mumbled softly as I counted out the gift options in front of me. Yes, I was looking for a gift for Justin, and it wasn't last minute. His birthday is in a week and three days, so I'm looking for a perfect present. I also have to go shopping for an outfit for the big b-day bash he's having in some Hollywood club. Everybody from Pharrell and Usher to Britney are going to be there. That's right, Ms. Spears is coming to this thing. I don't know if that's the reason why I'm killing myself to find the perfect outfit. It wasn't jealousy, it was more about proving myself. Either way it's pathetic, I know.
"Did you decide yet?" I looked up from my list to groan in Scott's direction.
"No." I pouted. He walked over to the table and sat next to me.
"Well, what do you have?" I shifted my list to the first page and moved it between us.
"I have the video games, and DVDs option." I showed him the list of titles, "Then there are the CD options," Another list is displayed, "And this is the mother of pearl," I stated dramatically. Scott looked at the picture and nodded approvingly.
"I like the mother of pearl." He smiled while tapping the picture. It was a black wood guitar with a silver outline. I was going to engrave it with his name and a message from me. I thought it was a good gift. Considering the fact that it can be used in his music also.
"You think?"
"I know." I smiled and sighed.
"Fine, the mother of pearl it is." I looked down at the paper and cringed at the price. Two-hundred and fifty dollars, and that's not counting the shipping price. But Justin was worth it. I'm pretty sure that the locket I'm wearing cost more than a pretty penny too, but Justin's paycheck was way bigger than mine.
"You guys ready to go?" Tiffany asked cheerfully as she entered the room.
"We were ready half an hour ago." Scott whined, "You're the one that had to change again." Tiffany smiled at him.
"But I look good, don't I?" She began to wiggle her hips teasingly. Scott smiled and nodded.
"No argument there." They kissed briefly before acknowledging my existence
"You got everything, Lonsha?" Tiffany asked I nodded and picked up my papers.
"Let's go before Al has a pregnancy fit." They laughed before we headed out of the apartment.
After driving for about fifteen minutes, we reached the mall where we were meeting Al and Jare. They were in front of the Kay Bee Kids just like they promised. We all walked around to help pick out some baby stuff. The crib, toys, walkers, strollers, and all that other good stuff. We eventually ended up in a PacSun when Jared saw a matching baby and daddy shirt. It was too cute to watch how excited he got over it, but I was interrupted by ringing of my cell.
"What?" I asked as I picked it up, knowing it was Justin.
"Where are you?" Justin asked worriedly.
"Mall, why?" I ran my hands over the soft material of a basketball jersey.
"I kinda needed to talk to you about something." He sounded nervous.
"Is everything alright?" I asked concerned. He sighed into the phone and paused.
"It depends on how you take it." Huh?
"What do you mean? What's going on?" He laughed.
"Calm down, Beautiful. It's nothing. . .bad." He was being weird. Weirder than usual anyway.
"Well, tell me what's going on." I demanded. He coughed.
"I'd rather tell you in person." I heard some shuffling around, "You free tonight?"
"Yeah, sure." I answered cautiously.
"Okay then, I'll swing by and pick you up at eight." He paused, "I assure that everything's okay." I rolled my eyes. Like that really helped.
"Okay. I'll see you tonight." We said our goodbyes and I hung up. What could he possibly have to tell me? Maybe it had to do with him spacing out the other night.
"You alright?" I turned to face Allison. I smiled towards her and nodded.
"Yeah," I told her, "I'm fine."
-*-*-*-*-*-*-
Justin had picked me up earlier. He looked handsome in his black trousers and white dress shirt. After telling me that he had a surprise for me, he parked the car outside his mansion's steps. I watched as he ran around the car to my side and opened the door for me. He took my hand and helped me out of the car before shutting it. As we reached his mahogany doors, he walked ahead of me and opened them. I stepped inside before I felt his hands cover my eyes. I could hear the door shut behind us and I could feel his warmth against my back.
"Walk up." he instructed. I did as I was told. I raised my foot up when he warned me about a step. He guided me through the house before coming to a stop. I couldn't tell where we were so I kept my eyes closed tight. After feeling the warmth of his hands leave my face, I heard Justin speak, "Open your eyes." My eyes shot open only to reveal a candlelit dinner in front of me.
"Aw, Justin." I cooed. He stood beside me and took my hand in his as he began to walk towards to table.
"Don't worry, I didn't cook it." Justin assured as I laughed.
"I wasn't worried, Jay. This is just really sweet of you." He blushed and pulled out my chair for me before taking his own seat across from me. We ate our delicious dinner, some small talk here and there. It was romantic and comfortable. It was also something I didn't expect. He said he wanted to talk, not have a romantic dinner. Maybe that was all a distraction so he could surprise me.
Maybe.
After dinner we had some Sara Lee ice cream pie. We took it into the living room where Justin had moved his piano. I sat comfortably into the plush love seat and watched as Justin made his way to the piano. He sat down on the black bench chair and lightly ran his fingers over the keys.
"I wanna sing something for you." he announced. My heart picked up speed. He had never sung something for me before.
"I'm here to listen." I said softly. He turned and looked over his shoulder to smile at me briefly before turning back to the piano. He began to play the keys softly and I closed my eyes and listened to the words.
"Baby, don't turn out the light
I wanna see you look at me
Whisper only truth tonight
Not just promises and empty fantasies"
He paused briefly to play out the keys before continuing again.
"I don't need a bed of roses
'Cause roses wither away
All I really need is honesty
From someone with a strong heart
A gentle hand
Who'll take me as I am"
I wanted to tell him that I did take him as he was, and how I wished he would do the same for me.
"Baby, I need for you to know
Just exactly how I feel
Fiery passions come and go
I'd trade a million pretty words
For one touch that is real"
The melody was oh so sweet. Sweet like the words and the man singing them.
"I don't need a bed of roses
'Cause roses wither away
All I really need is honesty
From someone with a strong heart
A gentle hand
Who'll take me as I am"
I take you as you are. I thought as placed my hand over my heart, I take you as you are.
"I don't need a bed of roses
'Cause roses wither away
All I really need is honesty
From someone with a strong heart
A gentle hand
Who'll take me as I am
From someone with a strong heart
A gentle hand
Who'll take me as I am"
Someone with a strong heart? Was I that someone? Did I have a strong heart?
"That was beautiful. . ." I whispered breathlessly as he finished playing the remaining keys. My eyes slowly drifted open in time to see Justin rise from the piano and stroll over to me.
"Really?" he asked bashfully. I smiled and nodded.
"I loved it." I reassured. He blushed as he sat next to me on the couch.
"I'm glad you did." He took my hands in his, "I wrote it because of you." I smiled as I felt that familiar swarm of butterflies.
"So I'm your muse now?" I asked playfully. He chuckled lightly before smiling at me, revealing his perfect teeth.
"Whether you like it or not." I smiled and kissed him. At first it was gentle, but then it turned into something feverish. I placed my hand on his cheek as he slipped his tongue into my mouth. This was probably the hundredth time we've kissed, but it always felt like the first time.
As we pulled away from the kiss for air, I smiled and said, "Thank you for everything." He licked his lips.
"I still have something for you, Sexy." he informed me with a mischievous grin, "Follow me." He offered his hand and I took it. We walked upstairs and down the hall. I could see the light from his fire place dancing on the wall across from his door. He led me inside of his room, which was warm and had the scent of lavender in the air. I smiled when I saw a silk night gown laying across his bed surrounded by white rose petals.
"Is this for me?" I asked as I ran my hand over the soft material. I looked over at Justin who was leaning on the door frame.
"More for me than you, but still. . ." I laughed and he walked over toward me. His hands wrapped around my waist and he leaned down to meet my lips in a soft kiss.
"I think I'll go change now," I said as I pulled away from him. I turned and made my way into the bathroom before I felt a familiar form pressed against my backside.
"I think I'll help you with that."
-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-
Poke. I giggled. Poke. I giggled again. Poke. I laughed and turned in the bed to face Justin. His eyes were closed. His breathing was soft. He looked so peaceful in his sleep. . .
The faker.
"I know you're awake, you bum." I said with an attitude. He didn't flinch. Okay, he wanted to play games. I smiled to myself as I lifted up his hand and brought it to my mouth. I began to suck his fingers slowly and rub my leg against his.
"Wakey, wakey." I called softly, "It's time for your morning nookie." I could see a smile curling up the corner of his lips. I held his hand while my free hand traveled down his side and rested on his hip. My fingers began to run up and down his side, tickling him softly. I watched as he shifted. I tickled him down his belly and his smile grew. Then I moved them up to his face and tickled him in the spot beneath his jaw. He laughed heartily before burying his face into his pillow. I laughed also at his childish innocence.
"Damn. I was so good until you did that." Justin complained.
"You were smiling the whole time." I impugned as I pulled his white sheet over my shoulder.
"Why do you do that?" he questioned suddenly as he flipped on his stomach, his arms folded beneath his head. I shrugged and turned on my side to face him.
"I don't know," I confessed, "I'm just more comfortable covered up." He smiled softly and turned on his side also, his hand supporting his head.
"Why would you cover up? You've got it, why not flaunt it?" I snorted and turned my back to him.
"I've got too much of it, that's why." As the words escaped my lips, I quickly regretted it. I was never the one to moan and groan about my size, but the truth of the matter was that I was no size two. Hell, I wasn't even a ten. My wide hips and big butt played a huge part in that, put the emphasis on the word huge, but my stomach wasn't helping the situation either. I guess that's why I pull the covers so high up over me. I don't want Justin to see my imperfections.
"The more the merrier." Justin stated cheerfully. I rolled my eyes. He really wasn't helping.
"Right, Justin. Right." I stated sarcastically. He sighed and draped his arm over my side.
"Don't do that." he whispered sadly.
"Do what?" I asked as though I had no idea what he was talking about.
"Don't bullshit me, Lonnie." he mumbled, "You know exactly what I'm talking about."
"Justin, must we do this?" I whined.
"You're beautiful. Sexy. Amazing." he commented, "Don't ever doubt that."
"Sure, Jay. Whatever you say."
"Move the sheet." he demanded out of nowhere. I turned to face him.
"What?" I asked him.
"Uncover yourself."
"No." I stated firmly before I felt a tug at the sheets.
"Move this now, or face the consequences."
"Bite me." He began to pull the sheet off of me and I clung to it like a monkey to its cage.
"Let go." Justin said as he stopped tugging momentarily.
"Justin, stop." I commanded, well more like whined. He only smiled and jumped out of bed, completely naked.
"Look, I'm naked in front of you with no shame." he reasoned. I rolled my eyes again.
"Says the guy with a six pack." I stated bitterly. Justin laughed and placed his hands on his hips.
"Come on, Lonnie. Stand next to me in comfortable pride." I smiled and shook my head.
"No, Justin. You won't like what you see." I warned.
"I'll be the judge of that."
"Exactly." I said as I pulled the sheet up higher.
"Fine," Justin said as he walked back over to the bed and slipped under the sheet with me, "I guess I'll take it all in when we're having sex." He said it like it was a bad thing.
"Justin." I whined as I turned to face him, "Don't be mad." He smiled at me and wrapped his arms around my waist.
"I'm not." he corrected, "I just wanted you to be comfortable with me." He kissed my forehead.
"I am, but I just need to be comfortable with myself in that way before I can show you." He nodded.
"It's cool, but I have to tell you something." I lifted my arm out from under the sheet and Justin gently ran his hand along it.
"What's the matter?" I asked as he sighed.
"I wanted to tell you last night, but I got caught up in other things." He smiled weakly, "It's important and I want you to believe me when I tell you this."
"Okay, just tell me what's up." I encouraged.
"Alonsha. . . I. . . um. . ." His stuttering was cut off the shrill ringing of his phone. He rolled his eyes and got out of bed. He retrieved the phone off of his stereo top and place it on his ear. I didn't pay attention to the conversation, I was more worried about what he had to tell me. Was it good? Was it bad? Not really because according to Justin, 'It depends'.
Whatever that means.
"Damn it." My attention went to Justin's frustrated figure. He walked over to his dresser and pulled out some boxer briefs from the top drawer before slipping them on.
"What's wrong?" I asked concerned.
"Mike's picking me up any minute now for an interview with Details." he groaned, as though the words had physically hurt to say.
"Oh, okay." I said disappointedly. I wrapped the sheet around my body before standing up and looking for my clothes.
"I'm sorry, babe. This is really last minute." he explained. I brushed him off.
"It's cool." I said nonchalantly, "It comes with the territory." Before I could blink, I heard the blaring horns of a Suburban outside.
"Shit. . ." Justin grumbled as he pulled a shirt over his head, "Here's the key to one of my cars." he said as he handed me a silver key. I took it and smiled as he tripped over his Nike's. He laughed and kissed me on the cheek.
"Bye!" I called after his retreating form.
"Bye, Sexy!" he called back hurriedly. I sighed in frustration when I heard the echo of a closing door.
Was I ever going to find out what he wanted to tell me?
Song Credit(s):
"If I Fell"- Maroon 5
"Take Me As I Am"- Faith Hill
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