Skillet Sensations
Justin and Alonsha were laying comfortably among the crumpled sheets that tangled around them. It wasn't the best day to be in LA, in fact, it had been pouring rain outside for a majority of the morning. But Alonsha and Justin were too engrossed in one another to care about the cloudy sky and the cold air that rustled the trees surrounding his lavish estate.
Sunday morning rain is falling
Steal some covers share some skin
It wasn't just a physical enjoyment, it was the connection they shared. They had been giggling at nothing, and talking about whatever came to mind. Alonsha had felt a lot better now about their growing relationship. She had told Justin about the isolation she felt in her own home. She didn't tell him about the physical abuse though, she had been too embarrass, but Justin didn't push her when she hesitated to continue her story. He was respecting her privacy, and Alonsha was grateful that he was being so understanding.
Clouds are shrouding us in moments unforgettable
You twist to fit the mold that I am in
Justin smiled when Alonsha snuggled up against him, her lips grazing his neck as she did so. The warmth and softness of her skin nearly overwhelmed him as his heart swelled for her love. She hadn't said it yet and to say that it didn't matter to him was a lie. But he wasn't angry, confused maybe, but not angry. He understood that she was scared. He had been afraid too, but his fear came from one thing: cheating women. But Alonsha's fear rooted from some place deep in her heart. She was emotionally scarred by her father. Justin had been surprised and relieved when she told him about how he treated her. Calling her out of her name, saying she never did anything right. It pissed him off. He wanted to go to her father and kill him for putting her through that. But what good would that do? It wouldn't change the way she felt about herself, and it wouldn't take her pain away.
"What are you thinking about?" Alonsha asked softly as her eyes met his. He smiled and ran his hand softly through her hair.
"You." She smiled and moved her gaze to his chain as her fingers gently findled with the cold metal.
"I don't want you to leave." Alonsha whined as she held him tighter. Justin laughed lightly at her childish behavior before kissing her temple.
"I don't want me to leave either." He didn't want to leave. But his career had sky rocketed and he was needed for autograph signings and t.v. interviews. He hated it but loved it all the same. It was his passion. The music, the fans, but the interviews, filled with the same empty and annoying questions, was unnecessary to him. This is where the celebrity came in. He needed to be interviewed because he had to promote his work.
But things just get so crazy, living life gets hard to do
And I would gladly hit the road get up and go if I knew
That someday it would lead me back to you
That someday it would lead me back to you
"I wish you weren't so fine," Alonsha laughed, "Maybe everybody wouldn't want a piece of you." Justin smiled at her theory before running his hand over her bottom and resting it on her hip.
"Would you still want a piece of me if I wasn't so fine?" Justin asked with a huge grin. Alonsha smiled softly and kissed him with her tender lips.
"I'd want all of you." she whispered sincerely. Justin's heart leaped happily in his chest and he kissed her back with a loving eagerness.
"I love you." he told her while staring into her eyes. She looked at him as if she were unsure of how to respond to his words.
"Justin. . ."
"You don't have to say it," he assured, "It's okay." Alonsha nodded despite the fact that she felt bad. Someone tells you they love and they get nothing in return. It was unfair, but Alonsha didn't want to say it unless she meant it.
"You can take it back." Alonsha said quietly. Justin looked at her, confused.
"Take what back?" he asked as he searched her eyes for answers.
"Your love." Justin laughed.
"I don't think that's how it works." He smiled, "Besides, I don't want to take it back. I'm giving it to you."
"But I haven't given it to you yet." Justin licked his lips and smiled.
"Better late than never, Sexy." Alonsha giggled when he poked her side.
"Better late than never?" Alonsha asked again to make sure. Justin nodded.
"Uh huh," he reassured with a smile.
"Okay," Alonsha said, "As long as you're okay with it." She pouted and Justin could tell she wasn't buying his 'better late than never' deal. But that's how he saw it. She didn't say it now, big whoop. The fact of the matter was she was going to say it one of these days. And Justin couldn't wait until his ears are graced by her sweet words.
Fingers trace your every outline
Paint a picture with my hands
Back and forth we sway like branches in a storm
Change the weather still together when it ends
-*-*-*-*-*-*-
Three weeks. Three long, boring, torturous weeks since I last saw Justin. . .
In person, anyway. I had seen him on t.v. I saw him on TRL and 106 & Park. I heard him on the radio. I listened to his CD, but it wasn't the same. Not being able to touch him. Talk to him face to face. Feel him wrap his arms around me and whisper that he loved me. . .
Yes, I liked to hear him say it. I felt so good when he did. To know that someone loves you is the greatest feeling in the world, but not loving that person back seriously sucked. But I didn't not love him. In fact, I think I'm dangerously close to saying it, to feeling it. I'm nervous though. Scared. Worried. What happens when I say it? Does he happily accept the fact that he has my heart and treat me right? Or does it all go down hill with him playing with me and my emotions?
Loving someone gives them this sort of power over you. They can make you do and say things that you normaly wouldn't. You begin to believe whatever they tell you because they love you, and people who love you don't lie to you, right? They know your weaknesses and fears. They can break you down in an instant. See, it's scary, isn't it?
But even though I think that way, something in me doesn't believe that it'll be like that with Justin. Like I know he's going to be the best boyfriend he can possibly be. But my insecurities are getting the best of me. Sometimes I sit down and think about why he loves me in the first place. I couldn't give you a decent answer if I tried. That's what's running through my mind. If I can't figure out why he loves me, how can I expect Justin to know why? He's probably going through this desperation phase where he'll take what he can get until someone better comes along. Tiffany said I crazy for thinking that and how I should be ashamed for not seeing how wonderful I am. Wonderful, huh? I hear it, but I don't see it.
"So then he goes, 'Well if you don't take us seriously, maybe we're in this relationship for all the wrong reasons.' I mean, come on! I'm eighteen for goodness sake. Why would I want to commit myself completely to one person? Does that even make sense?" I looked up at Mikela, a girl with obvious relationship issues, before shaking my head.
"No, it doesn't make sense." I agreed before yawning.
"Oh, I'm sorry," she apologized, "I always talk, talk, talk when I'm upset. I'm probably boring you to death."
Probably? Try definitely. "No, not at all. I'm here to listen to you, Mikela." She smiles and I'm satisfied that she likes my response.
"You're so great, Ms. D," she complimented as I smiled, "I'm so glad I can talk to you about these things. I mean, you're like a relationship guru." I wanted to snort obnoxiously and wave her off with a 'Yeah, right,' but she was so enthusiastic when she said it that I bit my tongue.
"Thanks," I said gratefully, "I really appreciate it."
"So, what should I do?" she questioned curiously. I thought for a moment before speaking.
"Maybe you should just sit down and talk with him like you did with me." Mikela scrunched her nose up in confusion.
"We did talk." she said as I forced myself to refrain from rolling my eyes.
"You guys didn't talk, you yelled," I corrected, "Big difference." Her girly giggle filled the quiet office before she playfully smacked my arm.
"Ms. D, you are hilarious." I smiled, despite the fact I didn't get the joke. All I knew was that she was leaving, and thank God for that. I waved when she gave me a giddy goodbye. Once the coast was clear, I fell limp on my arms and sighed. Finally, some quiet. I've been all over the place today. Paying bills, walking Bosco, counseling about 10 kids, and I didn't even eat lunch because I kindly gave it away to a homeless girl that came by. The poor thing. I hope she's okay. . .
"Ms. D!" My head shot up at the sound of Diana's calling voice. I was adjusting my clothing when the door swung open. Diana stood there in her bright pink shirt, smiling brightly, before speaking.
"Ms. D. . ." she cooed tauntingly, "You have visitor." I looked at her as though she was insane.
"Who?" I asked cautiously. She was a little too happy for my liking.
"Some dude who called himself your 'Randy Candy'," She giggled at the name, "Let me find out Ms. D got herself a sweet tooth." I laughed and my heart jumped when Justin's figure came into view.
"Wassup, Sexy Lady?" Justin winked at me and I stood up as I walked over to him. He hugged me and Diana laughed.
"I'm going to leave you guys alone," I laughed when she winked while giving me an approving thumbs up. Once the door was close, I felt Justin's warm mouth caress my own and I smiled at that familiar tingle. God, I could never get tired of kissing him.
"Damn I missed you," Justin said as he smiled against my lips. After giving him another soft kiss, I pulled away and looked him up-and-down.
"You look pale. . ." I told him worriedly, "And thin. Have you been eating right?" Justin laughed and pulled me into a hug.
"You sound like my mama," He kissed the top of my head and I smiled as we pulled apart.
"I believe that's a compliment coming from you," He smiled over his shoulder at me as he made him way over to my desk.
"You've got a lot of pictures on here," he mumbled absentmindedly, "But I don't see any of me." The pout was already in full swing when he faced me. I rolled my eyes as he sat on the edge of my desk.
"I work at a teen recreational center, Jay. The last thing I need to do is advertise the fact that I know you." His hands reached out and grabbed my hips. I giggled when he brought me to the area between his open legs. I stood in front of him and he kissed my jaw line softly.
"You smell so good," he growled into my neck. I could feel the butterflies forming in the pit of my stomach and I smiled.
"Were you expecting me to stink?" I asked with a raised brow. He looked up at me with a broad smile. His eyes were sparkling in the light of the office and for a moment time stood still. That's when I felt it. The moment of completeness. The security that things would be okay.
I had fallen in love with Justin Timberlake.
-*-*-*-*-*-
He twirled me until I was dizzy and laughing my ass off. I don't think I've laughed so much in my entire life. Justin looked so proud as he dipped me down and brought me back up again. I was grateful that he held me instead of falling over with me there to break his fall.
He was staring down at me with his gorgous eyes as he held me against his chest. His warm breath tickled my face with a minty freshness as we both struggled to catch our breath.
"And you claimed you couldn't dance." Justin taunted incredulously. I just rolled my eyes and pulled away from his grasp.
"Whatever, you did all the work. I just stood there and looked pretty." Justin smiled at me.
"Yeah, you're right." he agreed, "But you did a good job at looking pretty." His eyes traveled up-and-down my body, and I suddenly became self-conscious beneath his stare.
"Justin, shut up," I shoved him playfully, "And stop ogling at me, weirdo." He laughed.
"I'm not a weirdo," he protested.
"Uh huh, you keep telling yourself that." I walked out of his living room and into his kitchen, raiding his fridge in search of something to satiate my hunger.
"I'm not here to feed you, woman. Get out of my fridge," Justin whined jokingly.
"You won't have to feed me," I explained as I grabbed a Skillet Sensations bag out of the freezer, "I got it."
"Oh hell no, you don't fuck with my Skillet Sensations," Justin made a grab for the bag but I tucked it behind my back.
"Oh come on," I whined, "I'll make it for the both of us." My eyes went into puppy mode and Justin groaned. Works every time.
"Fine." I let out a yelp of excitment, thanking him as if he had given me the map to Atlantis. He walked over to the counter and hopped on top of it. He idly swung his legs and I felt him staring at me as I moved about the kitchen.
"Justin, what did I say about ogling me?" I questioned sternly, never turning to see his reaction.
"Sorry," he apologized, sheepishly. I smiled to myself and continued to gather the pot for the cooking.
-*-*-*-*-*-*-
Justin had continued to stare at Alonsha's moving form, despite the fact that she had threatened him everytime she caught him. He liked the way her hips swayed as she walked. But her ass was the object of his affection. One word: Damn.
She was thick, as Justin liked to call it. Alonsha had to be between a ten to fourteen. He couldn't tell. And to be completely honest, he couldn't care less. He wasn't lying when he called her beautiful. She wasn't heart stopping gorgeous to the naked eye. In fact, people would see her as average. But there was something dead sexy about the way she carried herself. Confident when she needed to be. Shy and sweet when she wanted to be. Justin couldn't decide which side he liked better.
"Jay?" Alonsha called over her shoulder, taking Justin out of his thoughts.
"Huh?" he responded while jumping off of the counter.
"Nothing, you were just too quiet," Justin smiled when she turned and gave him her traditional cheeky grin.
"You complain when I talk. You complain when I don't talk. What do you want from me?" Justin said mellow-dramatically.
"I want you to taste this," She held up a spoon to his mouth. He made a face before slurping up the contents greedily.
"Mmm. . ." He smiled, "What did you put in it?" Alonsha shrugged.
"A little bit of this, a little bit of that."
"Funny, I've never heard of those ingredients before," Alonsha laughed at his sarcasm and sighed.
"You know, sarcastic people are those who are hurting and have something to hide," Justin looked at her, confused.
"Where the hell did that come from?" Alonsha shrugged and turned her attention back to the stove.
"I read it in one of my psychology books," Justin nodded.
"What else did you read?" he asked curiously.
"I read that people can be affected by childhood events mentally and not even know it." Justin scrunched up his face.
"Could you clarify that for me?" Alonsha paused in thought.
"It means that if someone experiences a traumatic event as an infant, it can still effect them in adult life."
"Hmm. . ." Justin said as he handed Alonsha a dish, "What are you implying?" Alonsha placed a heaping spoon of chicken and noddles onto his plate.
"What do you mean?" she questioned.
"I mean, why are you telling me this?" Alonsha shrugged.
"Just useless trivia, I guess," She handed him his plate before taking her own. They walked over to the kitchen table and sat down across from one another.
"So. . ." Justin placed some food into his mouth, "You've just been reading books all day?" Alonsha shook her head.
"Nah, the kids at the center kept me on my feet all day." she answered.
"What happened?"
"Well first off, this kid comes in and he asked me for condoms."
"Don't they always?" Justin smiled and Alonsha laughed.
"Yeah, but the thing about it was the fact that this kid was like ten." Justin busted out laughing.
"What the hell does a ten year old know about condoms?" he asked curiously. Alonsha just shrugged.
"I don't know. They seem to be getting younger and younger."
"Preach on preacher," Justin raised his hands above his head and closed his eyes as if he had been touched by the Holy Spirit.
"Never do that again," Alonsha laughed, "Anyway, I tell him that I want him to come to one of my sex-ed sessions on Friday so we could talk and make sure he's comfortable with everything. And you know what? He tells me that it's not his first time and he could take me all night." That sent Justin into hysterics. Alonsha couldn't help but laugh also.
"I like this kid already." Justin said as Alonsha rolled her eyes.
-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-
"So, did you tell him yet?" I looked at Tiffany and shook my head.
"No, not yet." She huffed and tossed her Cosmo magazine on the coffee table.
"And why not?" she whined as I flicked through the DVD options on the screen.
"It just never came up," I answered lamely.
"What kind of shit is that?" she asked rhetorically, "Did you bring it up?"
"No," I stated in a 'duh' tone, "I just. . . I don't know," I sighed.
"You know that you love him, that's what matters," she reasons.
"Do I really?" I questioned.
"Don't even, Alonsha. You love him and that's final." I would've laughed if she wasn't so serious.
"I know," I smiled, "But. . . He's so. . ." I struggled with my words.
"What is he now?" she asked in annoyance.
"Wonderful. . . Brilliant. . . Purrrfect. . ." I growled as she laughed.
"Well, tell his perfect ass that you love him," she encouraged.
"How?" I asked, "Do I just run up and say 'Guess what, baby? I love you!'?" Tiffany's bottom lip pertruded in thought.
"That might just work. . ." I rolled my eyes.
"Come on, Tiff. He told me he loved underneath the stars as we overlooked the LA skyline. I think I can do better than that."
"Then tell him that you love him while you're naked. That'll do the trick." I laughed because I knew she wasn't joking.
"I want it to be special."
"You sound like a virgin," she huffed, "'I want it to be special,'" she mocked.
"Fuck you," I tossed a pillow at her, "I just don't want to say it." Tiffany sat indian-style on the couch.
"You're telling him that you love him, girl," She smiled, "That's special enough," Damn her for being so deep.
"Why must you always speak like some. . ." I paused, "Relationship guru." I laughed at my borrowed words. She shrugged.
"I'm just deep like that." I rolled my eyes at her cockiness, "But this isn't about me. . ."
"I know, I know," I ran my hands through my curls, "I'm gonna tell him tomorrow night." I stated firmly. Tiffany smiled.
"Yes, that's what I'm talking about!" Tiffany cheered, "Don't waste any time." I laughed at her enthusiasm. I wasn't going to waste any time. Lord knows that I'm scared as fuck though. By tomorrow night, Justin's going to have my heart in his hands.
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