The Changes In Time
Crystal Walmack.
She was a cute little redhead that worked as a waitress at Chi. Her sweet smile and big green eyes were inviting. The light and raspy tone of her voice was somewhat intoxicating. She wasn't a shy girl either, standing out in a bright red dress. I would've thought she was perfect.
If she didn't talk so much.
"So anyway, Liz was like 'Frank is so gay' and I was like what? And then she was like 'I saw him kissing Mark in the backroom'." Wow. Just wow.
"That's. . .that's crazy, Crystal," I said as enthusiastically as I could. She seemed somewhat satisfied with my response.
"I know!" she breathed, "But let me tell you the best part-"
"Um, could you hold that thought?" I interrupted politely, "It's nine o'clock and I promised my daughter I'd call before she went to bed."
"Oh, go ahead. I'll be waiting for you." She offers me a wink as I stand up and walk toward a secluded area of the Italian resturant we were dining in. I rolled my eyes and sighed once I was out of Crystal's view before I dialed the familiar digits of my home phone number.
"Timberlake residence." I smile as Josie's professional tone flows through the phone. It's amazing how much she matured over the last five years.
"Hey, sweetie," I greet, "It's daddy."
"Oh, hey dad." My shoulders slump when she calls me dad. It made me realize how grown she's getting, leaving her old pops behind.
"What's going on?" I asked curiously, "Is Uncle Trace still there?"
"Yeah, he's in the shower," Josie replies, "How's your date going?" I roll my eyes before answering.
"Um. . ." I pause, "It's going. . .well." Josie laughs and I chuckle lightly.
"You don't like her, huh?"
"She talks a lot," I explained, "But she's pretty."
"Every girl you date is pretty, dad," Josie points out, "Maybe you should stop dating girls Uncle Chris gives you." I nod my head in agreement.
"I was thinking the same thing," I smiled, "Why are you still up, missy?"
"To answer the phone," Josie answered, "You always call home when you're on a date."
"That's because I'm so bored," I whine, "I want to be in bed."
"Tell her I'm sick or something," Josie suggested, "Didn't that Dani lady fall for that?" I laughed as the memory flooded my mind. Dani was a hippie, to say the least. I spent most of our date listening to her talk about her mouse, George, and her views on making weed a legal drug.
"Yeah, but I don't want to reuse my lines," I breathed, "Maybe I can say the house is on fire."
"What if she wants to see it?" Josie laughed, "You're silly, dad."
"I'm not silly, I'm desperate," I correct, "Maybe I should just stick this one out."
"Okay," Josie said, "Will I get to meet her this time?"
"No, not this time," I told her, "Maybe you'll meet a girl who gets a second date."
"You're picky, dad," Josie sighs, "You're never going to find a girlfriend if you don't settle for someone."
"I never settle," I told her, "She has to be perfect, especially if she's going to be around you."
"Well, I don't see why you need to date anyway," Josie confesses, "I thought we were doing alright."
"We are, baby," I cooed, "Daddy's just trying to move on, ya know?" Josie's silent for a moment.
"Yeah," Her sad tone is heartbreaking, "Well, I'm going to bed now. Have fun."
"Oh yeah, I'm going to have fun," I said sarcastically, causing her to laugh, "I love you, princess."
"I love you too, dad," Josie tells me, "Goodnight."
"Goodnight," I repeat before sending her a kiss through the phone. She giggles and hangs up. I flip my cell close and heave a sigh as I make my way back to my table. Crystal's smiling at me and I return the gesture. She really is beautiful, but I can't sit through another lecture.
"Is everything alright?" she asked me the moment I was seated. I bet she couldn't wait to talk again.
"Um. . ." I think about lying, but my conscious doesn't allow it this time, "Everything's good."
"Good!" she exclaims, "Where was I before you left?"
On my last nerve. "The best part about the whole gay thing," I informed her as I place the dinner napkin across my lap.
"Oh yeah!" she said, "Well, I ran into Mark later that day to confront him about the whole thing. . ." And that's the last I heard of her for the rest of the night. I completely tuned her out and smiled while I nodded to whatever the hell she was talking about. The evening ended about an hour later and I told her I'd call.
I won't.
I know, I'm a dog. But did you hear that pointless conversation? I can't spend the rest of my life with someone who's completely infactuated with other people's drama. Besides, Josie would hate her, I just know it. We're close like that now. Kind of like my mom and I. Best friends.
She's so mature for her age. She's only nine, but she's smarter than me and sophistocated as hell. I guess that comes from Kia. She looks just like her mother and acts like her too. And she means the world to me, just like her mother did.
But what makes her most like her Nakia is her determination to get me to move on. Even if she hates the idea of me being with someone else, she knows I get lonely. She also knows I'm getting older. I'm thirty-eight now. I know. Wow, where did the time go, right?
I don't look like it though. My mom swears I pulled an Eminem or a Matt Damon. She says I never age. I may not look like a thirty-eight year old, but I feel like it.
Time has brought so many changes in my life. 'Nsync no longer exist. We had a good run, but we're too old for the whole band thing now. I still sing though, I'm just doing it behind scenes. I've got my own record company called 'Memphis'. Simple and obvious, I know, but it's doing really well. I'm proud about where I'm at right now, minus the whole single thing. No man at my age should still be dating, in my opinion. I'm tired of going on date, after date, after date. It's been over a year of dating and I have yet to find somebody.
Nobody's Kia, I guess. I know I should stop comparing people to her, but I can't help it. She was perfect for me, so why would I look for anything else? At least I'm trying though. In the beginning, I wouldn't even look at a woman. I had no interest whatsoever because I knew in my hearts of hearts, I was never going to find anybody.
I've been proven right so far.
My life has been too hectic anyway. Josie's been the leading lady in my life and it'll remain that way until she's on her own. I owe it to her. She was there when I went through some tough stuff and I regret putting her in the position she was in the first year after Kia's passing. The depression I went through had a major affect on her. I guess that's why she's so mature right now. She was forced to become an adult at a tender age in order to take care of me.
It still breaks my heart to remember the times she found me passed out from drinking or the times she heard me crying for hours while she went around the house, cleaning up the mess I'd make when I threw things in anger. I never raised a hand to her though. I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I ever hurted her. But her emotional scars will probably never heal. Yet, she stays by me and I make sure she knows that I love her more than life itself.
Damn, I'm babbling again. I guess some of Crystal's qualities rubbed off on me.
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