This is not what I intended
I always swore to you I'd never fall apart
You always thought that I was stronger
I may have failed
But I have loved you from the start
But hold your breath
Because tonight will be the night that I will fall for you
Over again
Don't make me change my mind
Or I wont live to see another day
I swear it's true
Because a girl like you is impossible to find
It's impossible
    
        

The chicken dance.    

I, Justin Timberlake, world renowned musician and dancer, am in a huge circle, surrounded by my family and friends....doing the fucking chicken dance.    

When I get married, I'm banning this shit. I mean, seriously...has anybody ever sat back and watched a group of people do this? It's got to be the dumbest looking thing in the whole damn world.    

Although, I'm sure with a little more liquor in my system, I'll be ready for the electric slide, next. And that rates pretty high on the lame scale, too.    

The whole day has just been...unreal. Lauren and Trace are finally married, and I can't hardly believe it. I mean, I couldn't be happier for them, but it's so weird. I guess it's just hard to believe that we're old enough to be settling down like this.  I gotta admit, seeing them so happy, really makes me wish Ally and I would have been ready.     

She's been confusing the hell out of me, all day. This afternoon was...it was amazing. For the first time, I felt like I was really on my way to getting her back. Even during the ceremony, I caught her staring at me every few minutes, but since we got here...she's barely said two words to me. It's all about Charlie, right now.    

I'm kind of wishing we could just cut the cake, and do all of the other traditional wedding garbage, so I can get the hell out of here.    

I just...how am I supposed to watch her flirt with him, and giggle at his stupid jokes...when I know, the bastard is married? Johnny isn't here yet, and I'm a little worried about what's going to happen when he does show up.     

He pretty much refused to believe me, or Trace, but when he sees the two of them together, there's no way he can ignore it.  Anybody could look at them right now, and know there's something there.    

They're seated at the wedding party table, Charlie's arm is draped over the back of Ally's chair, and she's leaning into him, a huge smile plastered on her face.    

I don't get it.    

How does she go from spending all day flirting with me...even fucking kissing me, but at the sight of that guy, it's like I don't exist?   Maybe I am just fighting a losing battle.    

I make my way over to the open bar, and order another Jack and Coke. It's going to take a good amount of alcohol to get through the rest of this night.  

Trace walks up behind me and pats me on the back. He's been grinning from ear to ear since we left the church, and I don't see any sign of that stopping. I almost can't wait to see how the pictures turn out...just so he can see how goofy he looks.    

"How ya holding up?" He asks as the bartender hands him a beer.    

I shrug and gulp down the rest of my drink, before I order another. "Could be better...could be worse."    

He smiles sadly, and nods. "It probably doesn't mean much, but I appreciate you staying cool about everything tonight."    

"It's all good." I shrug as we find a place to stand, close enough to the bar, but far away enough so that no one can hear us talking.    

For the millionth time today, I catch Ally staring at me, but when my eyes meet hers, she quickly looks away, and smiles at something Charlie just said.    

Almost on cue, Johnny and his wife stroll into the reception hall, and I swallow the lump that has formed in my throat.  They make a beeline for Lauren, and spend several minutes congratulating her, before Johnny's wife wanders off, and he heads my way.        

"Well...this should be nice and awkward." Trace chuckles and rolls his eyes.     

Johnny smiles proudly when he reaches us, and shakes Trace's hand. "Congratulations, kid."    

"Thanks man. Glad you could make it."    

"Oh, I couldn't miss this. It had to be seen to be believed." Johnny laughs and shakes his head. "You guys are making me feel like an old man."    

Johnny and Trace go back and forth for awhile, and I can feel my nerves quickly building up. I almost feel bad for Charlie. A pissed off Johnny Wright, is not a pleasant experience, and I'm sure Charlie's in for an ear full. I've been on the receiving end of Johnny's lectures more times than I care to count, and he always manages to make you feel about two feet tall, no matter what he's bitching at you about.    

Don't get me wrong...he's a great guy, and he's definitely someone you want, to have your back. He just...he has really high expectations, and he doesn't take any shit from anybody.    

He finally looks over toward the table, spotting Ally and Charlie. His eyes widen a bit, and a deep frown settles on his face, before he turns to look at Trace and I.    

Fuck.    

"You two were serious." He says more to himself, than us.    

Trace and I nod slowly, and Johnny marches off to the table. He whispers something to Charlie, who quickly stands up and follows him to an isolated corner. I haven't got a clue what they're saying, but their conversation gets heated pretty quick. Johnny is waving his arms around, and shaking his head angrily.    

Charlie doesn't seem to be backing down though. His eyes are set into an intense stare, and it looks like he's talking a mile a minute. Johnny's back is to me, but I can just picture the seething look on his face.    

Almost out of nowhere, Charlie breaks into a wide grin, and the next thing I know, he's full on laughing.    

What the hell is going on?    

The two of them start to walk back to the table, and they're both laughing their asses off. I don't get it. This isn't what's supposed to happen.    

Johnny was supposed to freak out...fire the douche bag...yell...scream...something. Anything but fucking laugh.    

How is adultery funny?    

"Dude, what the fuck?" Trace asks as he watches the entire exchange.     

"I don't know." I mutter and stalk back to the bar.     

I don't know what's going on, but I know that I don't like it.    

I am going to tell Ally everything, before this night is over.  

************************************    

"Alright, single ladies...you know what time it is!"  The DJ shouts into his mic.    

Damn near every woman in the place, jumps out of her seat, drops whatever she was doing, and flies out to the dancer floor. It's like, a stampede of desperate, single women.    

Lauren steps up on the small stage, and giggles as she waves her bouquet in the air.     

"Alright, ladies...let's keep it clean. No hair pulling, or any of that crazy stuff." The DJ chuckles.    

Several girls are already shoving and elbowing each other. I'm sure it's just a matter of time, before this turns into an all out brawl. Ally is right in the middle of the crowd, laughing with Trace's cousin, Ashley.     

Lauren turns her back to them, and the DJ slowly counts down from five. Lauren fakes a few throws, before she finally launches the bouquet in the air, and just as I suspected...every chick here, goes nuts.    

They're clawing and fighting, trying desperately to grab those damn flowers. Girls are fucking crazy.     

A few of them fall to the ground, still scrambling around, trying to get their hands on the bouquet, but one girl already has a firm grip on it. She carefully steps over the others, and laughs.    

I should have known it'd be her.    

"Well...looks like the maid of honor beat y'all to it." The DJ laughs, and points at the women still on the floor.     

Lauren hops off the stage, and heads straight for Ally, both of them giggling like crazy. I wouldn't be the least bit surprised, if those two planned the whole thing.     

"Now, that's interesting." Trace smirks, before heading to the floor, as the DJ calls all of the guys out. He grabs a chair, sets it in the middle of the floor, and Lauren quickly sits down.    

She pulls her skirt up, exposing her leg, as Trace bends down in front of her. He hams it up a little, before finally pulling the garter off. He swings it around his finger a few times, and hops up on the stage.     

A majority of the guys here, file out onto the floor, myself included.     

Hey...it's tradition, and as the best man...it's my duty to participate. It has nothing to do with wanting to be the one sliding that garter on Ally's leg.    

Ok...I lied. It has everything to do with it. I don't care what I have to do. I'm catching that damn garter.    

I look over to my left, and roll my eyes, when I spot Charlie, laughing loudly with Ally's youngest brother. I wonder if her family would think he's so fucking great, if they knew the truth.    

Trace starts to babble about something from his spot on the stage, before he finally sling shots the garter above our heads. Just like the girls...every guy is trying to grab it.     

As the thin strip of lacy black fabric, falls to the floor, I reach for it, and just barely miss it. I try to dive for it, but Trace's alcoholic uncle, Dave, violently shoves me out of his way, and the next thing I know, I'm flat on my ass, on the floor.    

As I go to stand up, I realize some of the guys have cleared out, and it's too late. Somebody got the garter...and it definitely wasn't me.    

Trace quickly jumps down from the stages, and waves his way over to the winner, and the sudden urge to put my fist through a wall, takes over.    

Of fucking course. How did I not see this coming?    

Is there anything this guy isn't going to take away from me? I mean seriously...my assistant..my girlfriend...my best friend...my manager. What's next? My fucking house?    

Ally takes her place in the chair in the middle of the floor, and hikes her dress up above the middle of her thigh. Charlie smirks at her, before he drops to his knees in front of her. Naturally, the DJ has to put on some overly romantic music.    

Am I really that bad of a guy? Do I really deserve this shit?    

Charlie slips the garter around her ankle, and takes his time sliding it up her leg. He's practically molesting her, but all anybody can do is laugh, and talk about what a cute couple they make.    

Once the garter is on Ally's thigh, she jumps up from her seat, wraps her arms around Charlie's neck, and plants her lips on his.    

Excuse me while I gag.    

That's supposed to be me out there. He's supposed to be in my shoes...realizing that maybe, he's never going to get the girl. Better yet...he should go home to his fucking wife.    

"Man...where the hell were you? I was gonna throw it to you." Trace shoves me a little as he appears at my side.    

"Your drunk ass uncle knocked me down." I shrug. "It's not a big deal."
    

Trace frowns, and rolls his eyes. "If it's not a big deal, why are you pouting?"    

"I am not." I huff. "Look...since all the important shit's done, you care if I take off? I want to stay, but I just can't watch that shit anymore."    

"I don't care..but you better check with Laur."    

I nod, and head toward the table where Lauren is seated, chatting with her sisters. Ally and Charlie are a few feet away, but they're far too wrapped up in each other to pay attention to me. I walk up behind Lauren, slide my arms around her neck and rest my chin on her shoulder.    

"I'm gonna head out...that ok?"    

"You alright?"    

"Oh yeah, I'm fine. I've got rehearsals in the morning, and just wanna get some sleep."    

She giggles and shakes her head. "Oh yeah, you need all the dancing energy you can get. Get out of here." She slaps the side of my head playfully, and after a quick hug, I grab my suit jacket and head for the door.    

I feel awful for leaving early, but I just couldn't take it anymore. And, there's really no telling what I would have done, if I'd stayed, and kept drinking. I can almost guarantee, I would have been shooting my mouth off though.    

I just make it to my car, when I hear heels, on the pavement behind me. I don't even have to turn around to know who it is.    

This, is the part I hate. I try to walk away, and she always manages to pull me right back in.    

"Justin?" She calls out unsurely. I force the best smile I can, take a deep breath and turn to face her.    

"Something wrong, Al?"    

"Are you leaving?"
    

"Yeah. I've got rehearsals pretty early. Figured I should get some sleep."    

"Oh...ok." She nods slowly. "Well...I guess I'll see you at home then."     

She turns to leave, and against my better judgement...I call her back. I promised myself, I was going to tell her the truth, and damnit...I'm going to do it. It's not for me, and it's not because I'm trying to win her back. I'm telling her, for her own good.    

"There's something you need to know."    

"Uh...ok." She chuckles a little, and raises her eyebrows at me. "What's up?"    

"Look...I just...you know that I am completely, insanely in love with you. And, I would never do anything to hurt you in any way...and I just...he's so wrong for you, Al. You have to see that."    

"Justin, come on. Don't do this now."    

"Will you just listen?"
    

"No. I'm tired of hearing the same shit, over and over again. I thought maybe, you were growing up, and we could work this out...but you're still so hung up on Charlie."    

"Oh, so I shouldn't be hung up on it, when I have to watch you shove your tongue down the guys throat, after you spend the day all over my shit? You tell me, what I'm supposed to think...since you're the fucking expert."    

"I'm not doing this right now." She throws her arms in the air helplessly, and turns to head back into the hall.    

"He's married, Al."    

She stops dead in her tracks, and slowly turns back around. I can't tell what she's thinking, but based on the look on her face, it can't be good. Maybe I shouldn't have just blurted it out like that, but I didn't know what else to do.     

"Where did you hear that?" Her voice is calm, but I can clearly see her hands shaking.    

"Johnny told me. Trace and I told him you guys were dating and..."    

"You told Johnny?" She asks angrily.     

This is part of what I hate, about arguing with her. She never lets me finish a damn sentence, and she has to constantly cut me off.     

"Yeah, we..."
    

"Were you trying to get me fired?"    

"No, it wasn't like that, at all. I was just..."
    

"Look...I know you've had an issue with Charlie from day one, but I never thought you'd go this low, Justin. First...you go to Johnny, deliberately trying to get one of us, if not both, into some major shit. And now...you're flat out lying. What the hell has happened to you?"
    

"I knew it. I so fucking knew, you'd never believe it, if it came from me. I'll go get Trace. Will you listen to him? Nah...you know what? I'll do you one better...let's go ask Charlie."
    

"You can stop being a dick, any time."    

"Well...what do you expect me to be? You're calling me a fucking liar, when all I'm trying to do, is help you!"    

"Oh don't play innocent, Justin. Don't stand there and act like you don't have anything to gain, if this is true." She shakes her head and rolls her eyes. "Was this the big master plan? Dig up some dirt on Charlie, blind side me with it, and make yourself look like the knight in shining armor?"     

"No. I didn't want to see you get dicked around by some asshole. This isn't about me, Ally. I'm trying to protect you!"    

As luck would have it, Charlie picks now, to come looking for Ally. I'd love nothing more than to knock him the fuck out, but I'll play it cool, for now. Ally seems to be listening to me, and I'm not going to screw that up, by acting like a jackass.    

"Everything ok?" Charlie looks between the two of us and smiles awkwardly.    

"Are you fucking married?"   

Damn. Now, there is my Ally. Completely to the point, no bullshit involved. I've always loved that about her. Charlie's mouth is hanging wide open, and Ally is glaring at him, arms folded over her chest. You wouldn't think it, but for a chick, she can be pretty intimidating.     

"I...well...I'm...technically...yes."     

Charlie hangs his head in defeat, and I really want to just scream out, I told you so, but I'm not going to do that. I'm going to be happy that he told her the truth, and stand back and watch the explosion that is undoubtedly about to happen.    

"Technically? What the hell does that mean?"    

Charlie eyes me suspiciously, then looks over at Ally. "I'm going through a divorce. I know, I should have told you...but it's just been really tough. I caught her sleeping with a friend of mine, and I can't stand talking about it, and I just...it'll be finalized in a couple weeks, and I just want to put it behind me and move on."    

Ally's expression softens, and I can't help but roll my eyes. I should have known there'd be some excuse.  And, of course...Ally's eating up every word of it.    

I don't get her anymore. She used to be one of the most skeptical people, I know. She's always been a no nonsense type of girl, and lately, it's like she's losing her backbone.    

"Ally...I'm sorry..." Charlie says quietly. "I wasn't trying to hide it from you, it's just been really hard to deal with."    

"No...it's ok." She nods and smiles sympathetically at him. "But, I think maybe we need to talk about this."    

"Yeah, we do." He says seriously and nods. "I'm gonna head back inside, we can go whenever you're ready."    

Ally nods as he walks back inside, then she turns to me, anger written all over her face. I wish I could say I'm surprised.    

"Are you happy now?"    

"Oh, come on Ally...you're joking, right? You're not seriously pissed at me about this?"
    

"Actually, yes...I am. What gives you the right, to go digging through someone else's life, Justin? I bet you never stopped to think that maybe, there was a perfectly reasonable explanation, did you? All you could think about, was that you finally had something to use against him. When are you going to realize, this isn't a war, and I'm not some fucking consolation prize?"    

"It's not like that, and you know it."    

"No, Justin, I don't. All I see is you, trying to compete with him."    

"Gee...maybe because you're stringing both of us along." I roll my eyes and frown. "Does he know about this afternoon? Or last night, for that matter? I'll bet he doesn't. Because if he did, I guarantee you, he'd drop your ass in a second. And you just can't have that, now can you? I mean, without Charlie, you'd just be stuck with me."    

"What? You think I'm enjoying this? This is not easy for me, Justin. I care about both of you, and I'm sorry that I don't know what I want. I'm not trying to string either of you along, or hurt anybody."    

I roll my eyes and laugh bitterly. This whole thing is spiraling out of control, and it's like there's no end in sight. Something has to change, and it has to happen now. All of the arguing, and talking ourselves to death, hasn't solved a damn thing.    

"Ally, I'm going to ask you, for the last time, to work this out with me. Come back as my PA, and we can get this straightened out. If it doesn't work...fine. I'll back off. You atleast owe me that much."
    

"I don't owe you shit, Justin."    

"You promised me we'd try, and I expect you to keep that promise."    

She bites her lip, and looks down at her shoes. "What about Charlie?"    

"Honestly...do you think a guy, who's going through a divorce, needs to be involved with someone right now?"    

She laughs through her tears and rolls her eyes. "I hate when you make sense."    

"Yeah, well...it doesn't happen too often." I shrug. "So, what's it gonna be?"    

She sighs, and stares at me, for what feels like hours.  She has to know, that this is the only way we can do this. If we try to straighten this mess out, while I'm on the road, and she's back here, we'd never reach a solution. This can't be done over the phone, or flying out to see each other every few weeks. I know, I'll be busy most of the time, but atleast she won't be thousands of miles away.     

She takes a deep breath, and nods slowly. "Ok."
    

"You're sure?"
    

"Yeah...I am." She cracks a small smile, and I swear to God, I could kiss her right now.    

But, I'm going to hold back. I'm going to do this right, and take baby steps. We'll work on our friendship, and once that's restored, hopefully, we can delve into the romantic stuff. But, not until I know we're ok.    

If I can't be with her, I atleast have to get my best friend back. I'm not going to lose the people closest to me, after all this time. I've worked too damn hard to keep them around, despite my career, and all of the shit that goes along with it.    

This won't be easy, but things can't get any worse, right? Besides...I got her to agree with me, and that's half the battle, as far as I'm concerned.

***********************************    

It's well after three A.M., when the front door finally opens and closes quietly. I know there is absolutely no way, the reception lasted this long.     

I can only guess that she and Charlie had their big talk.     

In a way, I feel kind of bad for the guy. I know how it feels to have the woman, you believe you're going to spend the rest of your life with, cheating on you. It's unbearable, and there were times, I honestly thought I'd never get through it.     

Sleeping around didn't help, what so ever. It wasn't until Ally, that I finally stopped thinking about it. Maybe, Charlie felt the same way about her. Honestly...I don't know. I don't even know the guy, so I can't really guess how he feels.    

The door to my room creaks open, and Ally peeks inside. "You awake?"    

"Yeah, I heard you pull up." I lie. I've actually been laying her awake, since I got home.         

The last two days just keep re-playing in my head, and I still can't figure out why, she acted the way she did, but as soon as Charlie showed up...it was like she shut me off. But, I'm going to let it go. She's back here with me, and that's all that matters.    

"I talked to Johnny...and Charlie." She sighs and plops down on the bed. "After the video, I'm officially your PA, again."    

"Cool." I nod slowly and sit up. "How'd it go with Charlie?"    

"It was...well, it wasn't easy." She shrugs. "He understood. He said he kind of saw it coming...and I just...I feel awful, Justin."    

"There's nothing for you to feel bad about."
    

"Yes there is. He knew from day one, that he'd never compare to you...and how shitty is that? If we can't work this out, I don't want to spend the rest of my life carrying some torch, for you...I'm sorry, but I just can't do that. I don't want to make somebody else feel like shit, because I can't get over you."    

"Al...don't think like that." I lace my fingers through hers, and grin at her. "Because, it's going to work. And you don't have to worry about somebody else feeling shitty. There isn't going to be anybody else."    

"How can you be so sure? I mean, seriously...look at the first time around, we both acted like morons and..."
    

"Ally..." I interrupt her quickly. "Do you love me?"
    

"Yeah, I do, but..."
    

"And I love you. It's going to work. Trust me." I chuckle as she nods slowly.    

I know, I've said a million times, how we were going to straighten this out, and get everything back to normal, but this is the first time, where I honest to God, believe it. It's like, I can feel it in my gut or something.     

We're going to be ok. I know it. I just have to prove it to her.

"Fall For You"-Secondhand Serenade