The two months has just flown by. It seems like it was just yesterday that I was on Randy’s jet flying to Aspen getting ready to do a photo shoot for the Christmas catalog for Victoria’s Secret. And now…
Well now I’m on my second full day of ‘girl time’ with Mackenzie. I promised after everything settled down I would take her out… Well I guess you could say Justin promised for me. It was the only way he could convince Mackenzie to stay home when he flew out to surprise me for a week.
Dear god was it a good week.
No lie, from start to finish it was just amazing.
“Turn around, looking back towards me, and give me that ‘I want to fuck you’ look you love to give me.” Randy yells from behind his camera, still snapping photos even as I switch positions.
I turn towards him and give him the best ‘I want to fuck you face’ I could muster up. I mean the man’s gay and not at all my type, but I can place Justin’s face and body anywhere. I mean right now I would swear to everything that is holy that the man behind that camera was Justin.
“Yeah, that’s definitely the face I been dying to see for the past two weeks.” I hear from behind the camera. I’m pretty sure my eyes almost just bulged out of my head. I must be dreaming, I mean that can’t possibly be Justin.
He drops the camera down beside him, staring back at me with a huge grin on his face.
That’s definitely my Justin.
A rather loud squeal, one in which I’m pretty sure should not come out of a human being, came rushing out of my throat as I jumped down from the porch I was standing on, running as fast I could on the snow covered walk way to him. I jumped, or rather lurched myself at him, wrapping my arms around his neck and my legs around his waist, I grab both sides of his face and smash my lips against his.
“What are you doing here?” I ask, pulling away to look at him.
“It’s good to see you too darlin’.” He says, chuckling.
I lean forward to kiss him again, “It’s amazing seeing you here, but… Why?”
“Why?” He asks, laughing now.
“Yeah… Why am I seeing you. Shouldn’t you still be in New York?”
“I can certainly fly back there if you’d like.” He jokes, again laughing at me.
“I don’t want you to leave, I just… I can’t believe you’re really here.”
“I don’t mean to interrupt this lovely reunion, but you’re wrinkling the shirt and I don’t have the shot yet.” Randy says behind me, completely ruining the mood.
“You should look at the shot I took, I think I got it.” Justin says, grinning at me.
Randy sighs, “I’ll go take a look, but can you please put her down so I don’t have to call Cassandra in to iron her outfit again.”
“Oh knock it off Randy.” I say, shaking my head. Justin loosens his grip, trying to set me down, but I tighten my legs around his waist, “No way are you putting me down. Randy will deal with a few wrinkles. After all I did have to listen to his… meeting on the plane.”
“Meeting?” Justin asks, with a raised eyebrow.
“I’ll be checking the photos inside.” Randy says, quickly walking towards the cabin.
“You don’t want to tell Justin about your club?” I yell after him, laughing.
“What the hell are you talking about?” Justin asks, smirking at me.
“You don’t want to know believe me.”
“What if I do?”
“I’m serious…” I say, shaking my head.
“I hate being left out.” He says, pushing his bottom lip out at me.
“I had to listen to Randy and Johnny attending a meeting of the mile high club… The entire flight here.”
His face contorts into complete disgust and I just laugh, “I told you, you didn’t want to know…”
God I have never been more surprised than I was that day, and he kept surprising me all week.
“Where do you think you’re going?” He asks, pulling me back into bed, wrapping his arms around my waist.
“I have a shoot today.” I say, sighing at his touch.
“No you don’t. You have a day off too spend right here, in bed, with me.”
“How is that possible?”
“Because I got the shot and he promised me a day with you if I could do it.” he says, pulling me closer to his chest.
I laugh, “You did?”
“I did. I’m thinking if this whole music thing doesn’t work out, I’m going into photography. Randy was actually quite impressed with my skills. I think he likes me with his camera.”
“mmm… Well I’m certainly impressed with your… skills.”
Did I mention it was a week full of unbelievably good… no amazing sex. I mean the man kept going and going. It was like he was that damn energizer bunny for Christ’s sake. Every second we had alone or every second he made us be alone together, we were going at it. I’m in no way complaining about it either. It was certainly a week to remember.
“Lauren?” Mackenzie says, pulling me out of my lust filled memories.
“Yeah sweetie?” I say shaking the longing look of pure lust I probably have plastered all over my face.
“Thank you.”
“For what?”
“Spending time with me, I really love spending time with you.” She says, hugging me around my waist.
I smile, “I really love spending time with you too sweetie.”
“Can I ask you something?”
I nod, “Sure, let’s go sit down.” I say, walking over towards a bench along the side of the walkway of the park.
“What’s up?” I ask, when she doesn’t start.
“Well, I was just wondering if you and Daddy were ok.”
“of course we’re ok. Why do you think we aren’t?”
“I don’t.” She quickly responds, “I just was wondering because… Well because I don’t want to lose another mother.” She says, biting her bottom lip as she stares down at her feet swinging back and forth under the bench.
I turn towards her with tears in my eyes.
She thinks of me as her mother?
“I really love being with you Lauren and I think you’re amazing. You’re funny, smart, beautiful, stylish, super cool… you make my daddy happy. I mean he get’s this goofy look on his face every time someone even comes close to mentioning your name.”
I give her a half smile, encouraging her to keep talking because if I open my mouth I’m probably going to bust out crying.
“I really want you and me and Daddy to be a family. I want you to be my step-mom. I want to know that when I go to school, that when I come home you’re going to be there to talk to. I don’t want to go somewhere and find out that your gone one day.”
Where is she going with this? I would never leave her, I couldn’t. I can’t tell her that right now because I’m pretty sure it would just come out in a giant sob at this point.
“I know it’s not really my choice or anything, but I was wondering if you would marry my Daddy. I know you guys love each other and I figure if your married I’m guaranteed to never lose you.”
I can’t stop it now, the tears just flow freely down my face and I can’t wipe the smile off my face. She wants me to be her mom.
“I will do anything. I’ll clean my room everyday, I’ll do my own laundry, I’ll sell all my shoes… Please Lauren?” She begs, looking at me with hope in her eyes.
I can’t stop crying. This is the sweetest thing anyone has ever said to me. This little 7 year old girl is willing to sell her prized shoe collection for me. That’s huge!
“I’m never going to leave you M. I promise no matter what, you will be a part of my life and I will be a part of yours.”
“Not if you and daddy break up again.”
“Your dad wont have a choice. Besides, he wouldn’t do that to you or me.”
“So you wont marry daddy?” She asks, quietly, dropping her head again.
“Honey your dad and I have only been together for a few months and we’ve had some hard times in between.”
“But you got through them and your happy together right?”
“Yes but…”
“So why can’t you guys get married. I want my mom to have the same last name as me.”
I smile remembering the day her name was officially changed over from Mackenzie Kingston to Mackenzie Timberlake. It was on her birthday a little over a week ago. She was so excited to finally have the same last name as her dad. We threw her a huge surprise party that afternoon at the house in celebration of her name change and her birthday. We threw a surprise party for Trace the next day for his birthday. Then we had the first annual Timberlake/Ayala/Decker Thanksgiving. It was amazing. Ryan and I flew out to Memphis with Trace, Justin and Mackenzie and we spent the week celebrating everything. It was nice to be a part of a family again. Ryan said the same thing one night while we were there.
A family. I haven’t had a family in years. Of course I’ve had Ryan, but it’s nice to be a part of a big family again.
“Lauren please marry daddy.”
“Honey that’s something your dad… It’s not something you can just…” Oh hell. “Honey I’d give anything to be your mom. I really would.”
“But?” She sadly asks.
“But you can’t just ask me to marry your dad. He has to want to enough to ask me himself and like I said before we’ve only been together for a few months.”
“But if he asked you would you say yes?”
I take a deep breath and stare at her. Huh… Would I? I mean seriously we’ve been together what like 5 months tops? And we’ve actually spent what like a total of two months actually together?
“Lauren?”
“Yes.” I say, shocking myself.
She smiles brightly at me, “Really?” She squeals.
“Really, but you can’t push this on your dad. This is a decision he needs to make on his own and I don’t want you telling him we even had this discussion ok?”
She frowns, “Ok.”
“M I know you want this, but if you push your dad it may push him away from this. I promise no matter what, I’ll be apart of your life.”
“But I want you to be my mom… I want to call you mom…” She says, staring down at her feet again.
“Just because your dad and I aren’t married doesn’t mean I can’t be a mother to you. And you can call me whatever you want.”
“Really?” She asks, looking up at me with wide, bright eyes.
“Really. I love you M, and I promise nothing is going to change that.”
“I love you too.” She says as I pull her into a hug.
************************************************************************
“Kenzie! Lauren!” Justin yells, busting through the front door.
“Kitchen.” We both yell at the same time.
Justin barrels through the hallway and into the kitchen in record time, pausing only to give us both a kiss on the top of our heads.
“How was your girl day?”
Mackenzie and I smile at each other before she answers, “Amazing.” and I nod in agreement.
“What’s up with you? You ran through here pretty fast…” I ask looking back up to him.
“I got a call this afternoon that I’ve been waiting for.”
“Oh yeah…” I say, trying to get him to continue.
“Remember when a few weeks ago when I said that I wanted to do a Charity Concert?” He asks and I quickly nod, “Well I just got news that I have an amazing line up for said concert.”
“So it’s really going to happen?” I ask, smiling.
He nods, grinning from ear to ear, “I have Beyonce, Rihanna, T.I., Timbaland, Leona Lewis even confirmed today. Oh and I think they said something about the… wait what’s the name of that band… hmmm… is it the Jones Brothers?” Justin asks, trying hard not to grin.
“NO! THE JONAS BROTHERS!” Mackenzie screams, jumping up and down around the kitchen.
I laugh, watching her dance around in excitement.
“So does that mean I finally get to see you grace the stage?” I ask, grinning up at him.
“It does.”
“Mmmm… that is one of my fantasies you know.”
“Is that right?” He asks, pulling me against him, wrapping his arms around my waist.
“I have to go call Uncle Trace, he’s going to freak!” Mackenzie says, running out of the kitchen.
I laugh, “Trace a big Jonas Brothers fan?”
“I think he’s a closet fan…”
“hmmm.”
“Tell me more about theses… fantasies you have.”
I chuckle, “Well, about a month ago, M and I watched your HBO special from your last tour and I have to tell you, you were amazing on stage. God the way you moved around, dancing, humping, singing… It was so sexy.”
“So what’s your fantasy.”
“I have many, but one of them having you walk off stage, down the long hallway to your dressing room, passing all your groupies and techies, picking me out of the crowd.”
“So you want to play musician and the groupie?”
“Mmm… I’m sure it’s not exciting for you because I’m sure you’ve played this game before, but I haven’t and the way you look when your on stage… It’s hot.”
“I’ve never played this game before.”
“You’ve never fucked a groupie?” I ask, almost shocked by his confession.
“Never…”
“Wow.. I’m actually shocked.”
He laughs, “I’m willing to break my no groupie rule for you though.”
“Mmm I hope so.”
“What other fantasies do you have darlin’?”
“I guess you’ll have to wait and find out…”
He just laughs, “So how was your day?”
“Interesting.” I say, trying hard not to scream ‘your daughter wants us to get married’.
“Did you have fun?”
“I always do.” I say, smiling.
“DADDY!” Mackenzie screams, running down the stairs.
“KENZIE!” Justin yells back.
“Uncle Trace says you didn’t get me tickets to see the Jonas Brothers. Is that true?”
“Honey it’s your dad’s charity concert… you don’t need tickets. Uncle Trace is just being a goof.” I say, winking at her.
“You sure? I really get to see them?”
“If your dad says they’re going to be there, so are we.”
“WAHOO! Thanks Mom… Thanks Daddy.” She says, skipping out of the kitchen.
I know I heard Justin’s breath catch when she called me mom and I’m pretty sure my heart just burst. She has no idea how good that makes me feel. I could probably burst out crying right now, but I probably shouldn’t considering Justin’s probably wondering how this happened.
“Did… Did she just…” He says looking over towards me.
I turn quickly, trying to hide my face from him, but he gently grabs my arm, turning back towards him.
“Lauren?”
I bite my lower lip, letting a few tears fall down my face.
“Did she just call you mom?” he asks, wiping my cheeks with his thumb.
“She… She’s been doing it all day. I’m sorry I didn’t think she’d do it in front of you, but I couldn’t tell her not to… It’s so sweet.”
“She called you mom?” He asks again, still a little shocked.
“I’m sorry.”
He chuckles, “Why?”
“I’m sure you don’t want her calling me mom. I mean she just lost her real mother 4 months ago and…”
He chuckles again, “And?”
“I don’t know… But I love hearing her say it.”’
“So do I.” he says, leaning down to kiss me.
“What else did you two do today?”
“I asked her to marry you.” Mackenzie says, taking a seat at the island.
My eyes fly open as wide as they can go and I’m pretty sure my heart stopped.
Shit…
“You what?” Justin choked out.
So much for not telling dad…
