She didn’t say a word. Not one damn word.

She got up from the table, walked through the kitchen without a word and locked herself in the guest room. Paul is trying to talk to Justin but I can tell he’s not listening. He looks hurt, and I don’t blame him. His mother just walked out after he told her he was getting married.

I can’t believe this is happening right now. I had a gut feeling someone would react like this, but I thought it would’ve been Ryan not his mom.

What am I going to do? I can tell you what I want to do. Cry. But that’s not what I’m going to do, I can guarantee that. The last thing I want is for Justin to worry about how I’m dealing with this… craziness.

Oh god, my thoughts aren’t even making any sense! I’m losing it. I’m actually losing my shit right now. I know Trace knows it, but he’s keeping quiet, helping me with the dishes.

“She’ll come out eventually, she’s just shocked that you yelled at her.” Paul says with a sigh.

“That’s not why she walked out of here, Dad.” Justin says, in a sad voice.

I close my eyes and sigh, tossing my dishrag in the sink. I felt a tear fall down my face and I wipe it away quickly, looking around to see if anyone saw it. Lucky me, Trace did.

“Lauren, it’s going to be ok.” He whispers to me, so they can’t hear us in the next room.

“How? She doesn’t want me to marry him. I just wish I knew why.”

“Because I’m not fond of women who think it’s ok to pose for Playboy Magazine. That‘s not really a good role model for Mackenzie.” Lynn almost growls from the kitchen doorway.

Wow. Where the hell did that come from? Playboy? Really?

“What the hell are you talking about?” Justin asks, from the dining room doorway. He sends a look my way, but I’m still shocked. Where did she get information, untrue information, like that?

“Why don’t you ask your fiancé!” She spits out like flames. Everyone turns towards me waiting for me to answer.

“I’ve never, nor will I ever pose for Playboy or any other nude magazine. I may have been nude at a photo shoot, but I‘ll never show my private parts to the world. I have a hard enough time doing the shots where I have to cover myself. I‘m not at all comfortable with just letting it all hang out there for people to see.” I say, looking Lynn dead in the eyes.

“That’s funny because you’ve already done the photo shoot for it.” She says.

“What?” Justin, Ryan and I all yell at once.

“What a second. I know everything my sister has done, and that is not one of them. Believe me I would have been there with her. I’ve been to almost every other photo shoot with her.”

“Almost being the key word.” ooh snide remark there.

“I think I would know if my sister was in Playboy.” Ryan barks back at her.

“I think I would know if I was in Playboy.”

Lynn huffs, walking out of the room again. I turn towards Justin and panic.

“I swear to you that I would never do that. I’ve never posed for the magazine ever. I’ve been asked, numerous times, but I’ve always turned them down. I don’t know what she’s talking about.”

“I believe you. Trace would have told me if you were in there, anyways.” Justin jokes, but no one laughs.

Lynn marches back into the kitchen, smacking a magazine down on the table.

“Mackenzie go to your room.” She says, glaring at me.

“But…” Mac begins but Justin stops her, asking her a little less harshly to go upstairs for a few minutes.

I pick up the magazine, which is in no way Playboy by the way. It just so happens to be Star Magazine. I flip through it until I find a picture of myself on the beach with little smiley faces over my nipples and on the space between my thighs. My eyes bug out of my head. They photo shopped a picture of me on the beach? What the hell is this shit. I was never naked on the beach looking at a camera like that.

“What is it?” Justin asks, cautiously. “Wait, is that Star Magazine? Are you seriously making a stink over something out of a Tabloid magazine? What the hell is the matter with you? When have you ever listened to a word these things say?”

“Look at the photo Justin. That’s not fake!” She yells back.

“Give me that damn thing.” he says, ripping it out of my hands.

“What the hell?” He says looking at the photo.

“Oh my god!” I gasp.

“What? Remember the photo shoot now?” Lynn asks, in a smug tone.

“Yes. But it wasn’t for Playboy and I wasn’t naked. That is me, but I was wearing a bikini in that photo. It was a... a floral bikini and the top wrapped around… it was a little weird, but I was definitely wearing one. It was really tiny, so it wouldn’t be hard to erase it from a picture. It was in the magazine for Christ’s sake. I swear to you that’s a fake photo.”

Lynn rolls her eyes at me and I groan.

“Where’s your laptop Justin?” I ask, getting pissed. If she’s going to accuse me of something, I’m going to prove her wrong.

“Baby, you don’t need…”

“Where is it Justin?” I interrupt him. He sighs, walking out of the room, returning a few minutes later with his laptop. He sets it down in front of me, but leaves his hand on the top.

“You don’t need to do this. It’s ridiculous.”

“I don’t like being called a liar.” I say flatly.

It only took me a minute, a freaking minute, to find the real photo. There is no question that’s the exact same photo. People are so stupid sometimes. If your going to do something like this, try using a picture that wasn’t already in a magazine.

I turn the computer towards Lynn and toss her the magazine.

“It’s the exact same picture only ones been toyed with. I know you’re just protecting your son, but maybe you should ask before you accuse someone of something. I’m tired, it’s been a really long day and I think I’m just going to go home.” I turn towards Ryan, “Can I catch a ride?”

He hesitates for a minute, but nods. I turn, leaving the room, making my way up to say good-bye to Mac. I knock before entering and paste on a fake smile for her.

“Hey.”

“Hey. Can I come back down now?” She ask, jumping up off the bed.

“Uh, no. You should probably stay up here until your dad comes up to get you ok?”

“Where are you going?”

“I’m going home.”

“But you are home.” She’s making it really hard to swallow the lump growing in my throat.

“I need to, uh spend some time with my brother and get away from here for a little while ok? I’ll be back.” I say, leaving out when you Grandmother leaves.

“Why is Grammy so mad?”

“I, uh, don’t… She’s fine. I love you.” I say, hugging her.

“Love you too, hurry back.”

“I will, promise.” I say, smiling.

I head back to Justin’s room to grab my purse and walk right into him. He cups my face with his hands, running his thumbs over my cheeks. The lump in my throat was getting harder and harder to swallow.

“Please don’t leave.”

I let out a shaky breath. “I can’t stay here, Justin. I’m sorry.”

A few tears finally start to fall, but I stop them just as quickly as they started. I lean up to kiss him quickly, but he held on to me not wanting to let go.

“Baby, please don’t leave.” He says, before kissing me again. He’s killing me, but I have to get out of here before I explode.

“I’m sorry.” I say pulling away, “Call me when she leaves.” I say before walking out of his room.

The ride home was thankfully very quiet. Ryan knew better than to talk to me. He kept looking over at me and sighing. It took everything in me to keep from crying. I let a few tears fall, quickly wiping them away when Ryan reached over to grab my hand.

“It’ll work out. It always does.” Ryan says, trying to be supportive.

How many chance are we going to get though. Haven’t we been through enough hoops? Did we really need this extra hoop of flames to jump through? I don’t know how much more of this I can take. I love Justin, there’s no question about that, but I don’t know if I can handle all of this crap surrounding us. I have some serious thinking to do tonight. Looks like I wont be getting as much sleep as I’d like to.

************************************************************************

“I need a Livy day. Please tell me you don’t have plans today.” I whine into the phone at 6:45 in the morning.

“Well seeing as though it is only… Christ you called me before 7? What the hell… What’s wrong LO?”

“You haven’t called me that in years.” I say, smiling for the first time in the last 14 hours from hell.

“Honey, what’s going on?” She asks, getting concerned.

“I just need a Livy day. I haven’t seen you in a while and I miss you.”

“If I get up and meet you for coffee at Big John’s place, will you tell me what’s going on?”

“If you throw in a muffin you have a deal.”

I hung up the phone, jumping up out of bed to throw on a pair of shorts and tank top. Sliding on a pair of flip-flops, I pause to look at myself in the mirror. I look terrible, but I couldn’t care less. For the first time in my life I’m heart broken and I don’t know how to deal with it. I’ve been in love before, but never like this, which is a little ridiculous because we haven’t been together all that long. Maybe we just need to take some time and if we still want to get married in 6 months or a year then we will, but I don’t know if I can go around and be happy about our engagement. I think I need to call it off. At least it would make his mother happy right? Ha, like I give a shit what his mother thinks right now. That’s a horrible lie, but I still can’t face her and she’s supposed to be here through the weekend.

I sigh, walking out to my car. I pulled into Big John‘s place. He’s been running this coffee shop in the middle of nowhere for as long as I’ve known him. He makes the best white chocolate lattes I’ve ever tasted and I’ve had my fair share of lattes over the years.

“Well would you look at that. If it’s not the most beautiful model I’ve ever seen in the flesh.” Big John says, as I walk through the door.

“I’m the only model you’ve ever met, Big John.” I say, smiling.

He laughs, “How ya doing peanut?” he asks, giving me one of his famous bear hugs.

“I’m alright.” I lie, “How are you and Miss Ruby doing?”

“Mrs. Ruby to you now sweetheart.” Ruby says, flashing her rings at me.

I grin, “And I wasn’t invited to the wedding?” I scoff, “I’m insulted.”

“We went down to City Hall. You know me, nothing fancy.” Ruby says, waving me off.

“You want your regular, not that it’s very regular anymore.” Big John asks, hinting that I haven’t been around in a while.

“I know I haven’t been around lately. I’m sorry. I miss those damn lattes though.” I say, avoiding telling him why I haven’t been around. I didn’t come here to rehash what’s wrong in my life, I want to forget about it today even if just for a few hours.

“Well, here you go then.” Ruby says, handing me my cup. “And one for you miss O.”

I turn to see a very tired Olivia, plopping down in the seat next to me.

“You’re a godsend.” She says, taking a sip of her latte.

“Thank you Miss… Mrs. Ruby. I can’t do it… You’ll always be Miss Ruby to me. Sorry Big John.”

“Mrs? When did this happen?” Olivia asks with a yawn.

“About a month ago.” Big John says, grinning. “Best day of my life, marrying this one.” He says, kissing Ruby’s temple. I smile, watching the two of them looking at each other with so much love.

“You two are too cute.” Olivia gushes. “Now, are you going to tell me why you got me out of bed at 6:45 in the morning on a Saturday… My day off from a job that is extremely stressful and takes over my life every other day of the week?”

“I’m sorry, Livy. I just really needed a girls day out.”

“LO, what’s going on?” She asks, seeing through my bullshit.

I sigh, “Justin asked me to marry him and we had dinner with his parents, Trace and Ryan last night and his mother flipped out. She doesn’t want him to marry me and I don’t know what to do. I can’t face her again, not after how she treated me in front of everyone.”

“What did she do? And when were you going to tell me you were engaged? Where’s the ring?” She asks, pulling my hand out.

“He didn’t give me one.”

“Oh honey, you deserve a ring.” Ruby says, shaking her head.

“Oh, it’s not like that. He’s getting me one. It just happened so fast, that’s all. His daughter called me mom and asked me to marry her dad. Then she asked him to ask me and to make a long story short, he did.”

“Kenz called you mom? Aww that’s so cute, but why am I the last to know all this?”

“It just happened yesterday.”

“And are your fingers broken? Did you lose my number? Was there a gag order on this news that your best friend couldn’t know about this?” She asks, obviously hurt that I didn’t tell her first like she did with me.

“Look Livy, this whole thing happened so fast I didn’t know my left from my right. My heads still spinning and I can’t seem to get it to stop. I’m sorry I didn’t tell you sooner, but I really need a day to forget about all this shit. Please just do some shopping with me, spend a shit load of Derek’s money and make me forget, for just a few hours, that my life is in complete chaos right now.” I plead with her.

“That’s what we do, but I think we should bring Kenz. Give me your phone.” She says, holding out her hand. I shake my head, handing her my phone.

“Well hello there. I hope that was for Lauren, because if you miss me, we may have bigger problems.” Livy says, laughing.

“She’s fine, she’s right here. I was just calling because we were going to go shopping and I wanted to see if Miss Kenzie wanted to join us. Could you ask her for me? Thanks.”

“He’s asking.” She announces to all of us, patiently waiting on the phone.

“Oh good. I’ll pick her up in a half hour. Tell her to meet me out front.”

She’s silent for a minute and she turns away from me, making my stomach do flip-flops. What is he saying? She stands walking over towards the door and I sigh.

“I can tell her, but I really don’t think it’s going to help. It needs to come from her not me.” Olivia whispers, but not low enough.

“Look, just have Kenz ready in a half hour.” She says, a little louder, “Give her some time Justin.” She whispers at the end, before hanging up.

“All set. We’ll have the kiddo in a half hour. So drink that latte and let’s get this show on the road.” She says, grinning.

“What’d he say to you, Liv?” I ask.

“That he’d have her ready.” She says with a shrug.

“Olivia Jean. What did he say to you?” I ask, a little more harshly.

She lets out a deep breath, “His mother feels horrible and apologizes for acting ridiculous, but I told him that it wasn’t going to do anyone any good if I’m the one relaying the apology. He also said that he loves you and wants you to come back home.”

“I am at home. I don’t live there.”

“Honey he loves you and wants to marry you. He’s willing to share his mansion with you. He doesn’t want you living with your brother anymore. That wouldn’t be a very good marriage.”

“Yeah well there may not be a marriage.” I mumble.

“What are you talking about? You’re not really going to let that bitch ruin your happiness are you?”

“That bitch would become my mother-in-law.”

“You think I like my mother-in-law? Honey who does? That’s kind of part of the whole marriage thing. You have to love each other, you have to trust each other and the woman hates their mother-in-law. I think it’s a rule or something.”

“But Justin and his mother at like this.” I say, twisting two fingers together in front of me. “They tell each other everything, they are like best friends. We can’t have a very good marriage if she doesn’t like me.”

“Again, what mother-in-law ever really likes their daughter-in-law? I mean we stole their sons from them.” She says, making me laugh, “Honey, don’t let her ruin your happiness. You deserve to be happy and I know Justin will make you happy. He already does.”

“I hate it when your right.” I say, sticking my tongue out at her.

We both thanked Big John and Miss Ruby for the drinks and we left in my car, leaving Liv’s at the café. I start getting nervous, turning into Justin’s neighborhood, waving at the guard when he let us pass. I pull into his driveway and my hands actually start to shake. What is wrong with me?

“You want me to go get her?” Olivia asks, noticing my nervousness.

I shake my head, “No, I can do this.” I say, taking a deep breath before stepping out of the car, making my way to the front door. I ring the door bell just as Trace opens the door.

“Whoa!” He says, laughing. “Well this is a surprise. You here for Mac?”

I nod, “You leaving?”

“Yeah, I have to go find a date for your wedding.” He says, winking.

“What wedding?” I mumble, “Is she ready?”

“L, she feels horrible.”

I put my hand up to stop him, “Don’t… Do you mind just going to see if Mac is ready?”

“Yeah.” He says with a sigh. He turns, leaving me on the front porch. I hear footsteps so I turn immediately regretting coming here.

“Hello Lauren.” Lynn says with a smile.

“Mrs. Harless.” I say dejectedly. “I’m just here to get Mac. So you don’t have to worry, I wont be here long.” I say, turning back to face the front yard.

“I really wish you would come for dinner tonight.” She says from behind me and I roll my eyes. Is this her apologizing because it’s not working.

“I already have dinner plans. Sorry.”

“Hey Mum.” Mackenzie smiles, giving me a tight hug. “Thanks for inviting me.”

“Of course. Like I could shop without you. You’re my purchasing assistant.” I say, smiling down at her. “You ready?”

She nods, enthusiastically. “Daddy gave me some money to buy some new clothes!” She says, handing me a wad of cash, “But he said you have to take it.”

I laugh, “Jeez,” I spread the hundreds out and I shake my head, “Why’d he give you so much?”

She shrugs, “He just handed me what he had in his wallet.”

I laugh again, “He needs a Debit card.”

“A what?” Mac asks, with a raised eyebrow.

“Nevermind, you ready?” She nods, running towards the car.

“That money is for Mackenzie, not you and your friend.” Lynn snarls, from behind me.

She did not just go there. Does she really think that little of me? What the hell did I ever do to her?

“Wow.” I say, turning towards her. “You know, maybe if you got to know me you’d know me better than that, but you’ve chosen to just assume what you want about me. You’re so small minded that you can’t get to know someone, you automatically think the worst of people. I’m actually a nice person and I don’t deserve this shit from you. So when you grow up and want to get to know me for me and not what you assume is me, then let me know, but until then don’t talk to me.” I say, turning, walking towards my car.

“You're just after his money and I see right through you.” She yells out to me.

I stop dead in my tracks. Holy shit, I’m about to lose my shit on this woman. A woman that just so happens to be the love of my life’s mother.

I slowly turn back towards her, with fumes coming out of my nose. I’m pissed and she’s about to find out just how much.

“I don’t need his money and I’m not that shallow. If you’d like me to prove that to you I can. I’ll show you my bank account if you’d like. I have my own money and I would never be with someone simply for their money. I knew you didn’t like me, but this is too much.” I pause to swipe away the tears running down my face.

“No matter what you think of me, I’m still in love with your son and his daughter. I love them with my whole heart and I would do anything for either one of them. I don’t know what you have against me, but what your doing is wrong. You don’t seem to realize that your not just hurting me, your hurting your son and granddaughter.” I wipe my face again and sigh.

“I wish you would stop being so selfish and take the time to get to know me. Who knows you may actually like me. I’m not the dumb model, who can’t get a job and is mooching off your son that you think I am. I’m sure I’m just wasting my breath because your too narrow minded, but I love Justin and Mackenzie and they love me. Nothing you say or do is going to change that.” I turn and walk to my car. I get in, turn the ignition and back out of the driveway in complete silence. I know the two of them are dying to know what happened, but I’m way too pissed off to talk about it right now and I think they both realize that. Either that or their too scared to talk to me. My whole body is trembling and my mind is still trying to grasp the fact that I just had it out with Justin’s mother. What the hell was I thinking?

“Who’s ready to do some shopping?” I ask, plastering on a smile for them.

The both hesitate but smile back at me.

************************************************************************

I can’t believe that shit just happened. What the hell has gotten into my mother?

I watch Lauren take off and I’m still too shocked to register what just happened. Trace and I are standing behind the door dumbstruck. My stomach is in my throat and I’m on the verge of losing either my lunch or my cool. I can’t quite figure out which one is going to come first.

“Why would your mom think something like that about her? I thought she liked Lauren!” Trace whispers to me, his eyes still bulging out of his head.

I shake my head, “I thought so too. Did that really just happen? This isn’t some horrid dream?”

“It’s one fucked up dream, that’s for sure.” Trace says, scratching the top of his head. “Holy shit. I’m… I’m… I have no idea what to say to that.”

Just then my mom comes back in and stops suddenly, obviously shocked to see the two of us standing just behind the door. She quickly recovers, pasting on a smile.

“Lauren can’t make it to dinner. She already had plans. I’m sorry, but I tried.” She says, walking off towards the living room.

“You call that trying?” I ask, in shock. Did my mother just lie to me? What has gotten into her? This is not my mother.

She stops, her body going rigid as she slowly turns towards us. “I don’t know what your talking about.”

“Really? So I just imagined you accusing my fiancé of being a gold digging whore? Wow I must be losing it.” I say, shocked. She’s just staring at me as if I hadn’t said anything at all.

“What’s gotten into you? You’re insane. You used to like Lauren. What the hell happened?”

A look of hurt flashes across her face, but is quickly replaced by blankness. “I just don’t think she’s right for you, that’s all.”

“That’s not an answer.” I growl, through gritted teeth.

She just stares at me and something clicks in my head. “Are you jealous of her?”

She doesn’t answer, but the look on her face is enough of an answer for me. She’s jealous of her. But why?

“Mom, why would you be jealous of Lauren? That’s ridiculous. You’re my mother for Christ’s sake.”

She lets out a shaky breath, “Yesterday was the first time you’ve ever talked back to me. You even yelled at me and it was over her. You’ve never done that for a woman before and it scared me. It made me realize I was losing my son.”

“You’re not losing me. You’re my mom. You’re stuck with me for the rest of your life. No woman is going to change that.”

“I’m sorry.” She says, finally looking up at me. “I really screwed up didn’t I?”

I laugh angrily, “Not only did you screw up our relationship, you may have cost me my relationship with Lauren.” I turn towards Trace, “Do you know where they were going?”

He shrugs, walking out back with me “No, but I can help you find them.”

“Thanks man.” I say, watching him grab his phone to call her.

“Hey L, You ok?” He asks, and I hold my breath waiting to see his reaction to what she says.

He laughs, “I can imagine. Where you guys at?”

He laughed? What’s that mean? I don’t have much time to think about it because he hung up smiling.

“What?”

“You’ll never guess where they are.” he says, his grin growing wider.

“Where?” I ask impatiently.

“They are currently at Saks modeling swimwear for each other. I guess they just got a shipment in and the manager asked if they’d like to try them all on.”

“Let me guess, you want to come with me to go see her?” I ask, rolling my eyes.

“Damn straight. I’m not passing up a chance to see two beautiful women in teeny bikinis.”

“Two very taken women, let me remind you.”

“No harm in looking.” He says, grinning.