"Can I help you with these bags," JC asked as they got out of the vehicle once she'd parked it at her apartment building.
"Um, sure," she said quietly. The each grabbed a several bags, unloading the SUV completely, and headed up to her third floor apartment. When she opened the door, she set her bags just inside the door and turned around. She reached for the bags he held.
"I'm sorry for the kiss," JC apologized as he handed the bags to her and she placed them inside. Just as she was about to speak, he interrupted her. "Actually, ya know what, I'm not sorry for it. I wanted to kiss you. And I thought you wanted me to," he said with both anger and sadness in his voice.
Amanda searched for the words. She liked the kiss. But she was confused. "JC," she started while searching his eyes. God how she loved those eyes. She wanted to kiss him, to feel his soft, tender lips on hers again. To feel the electricity again that had coursed through her body with the first kiss. She lowered her eyes and spoke. "JC, I don't know how to interpret your actions."
"What do you mean," he replied with confusion, trying to probe her eyes for the reason behind her emotions.
"First you give me a very expensive gift," she said as she waved her hand to the 4-Runner below, "and then you kiss me. And I liked the kiss, but then I wonder if you're doing this because you like me or if because I'm just someone who told you 'no' and therefore needs to wooed, taken to bed, then never called again," she said, her voice full of emotions.
"I never meant you any harm," he said as he took a step closer to her. She lifted her head and looked him in the eyes. "I just…," he started then stopped. And before he could think, he leaned down and kissed her gently.
At first she didn't respond. Then he reached behind her, placing one hand on the small of her back and the other behind her head and pulled her closer. She felt herself respond to the heat of his body, wrapping her arms around his neck and deepened the kiss. Their bodies melded together, their frames perfectly matched for the other. After what seemed like an eternity, he pulled his head away from hers and looked into her eyes to see if everything was ok. She smiled back at him and moved forward to capture his lips with hers. He smiled then pulled away teasingly and then moved back towards her. When she tried to kiss him again, he again pulled away. When a look of concern flashed in her eyes, he quickly moved to cover her lips with his. Her hands wondered down his strong shoulders as he found the clip in her hair. He freed her long hair and ran his fingers through it. He soon broke the kiss again and gently kissed her forehead. He then laid feather-light kisses on each of her eyelids. Amanda responded by holding him closer.
As JC made his way to her neck, leaving a trail of kiss in his wake, Amanda opened her eyes and looked at the ceiling. Tears came to her eyes. She quickly moved her hands to his chest and pushed him away. "I'm sorry, I can't do this," she said with tears pouring down her face. She quickly stepped inside her apartment and shut the door before she could look at his face or he could respond.
"Amanda, open up," JC said as he pounded on the door.
"JC, go away," she answered, leaning her forehead against the door.
"But, that kiss…"
"It meant nothing," she lied. "Now, please go away."
"Nothing… but," he said confused as tears formed in his eyes. "I..," he couldn't think straight. He looked at the door and ran his hands through his hair in frustration. He kept trying to put a rational sentence together but couldn't. A minute or two later he turned from the door, bewildered, and walked down the steps to his Jeep.
Amanda, still crying, turned her back to the door and sat down and cried. She pulled the keys to her new vehicle out of her pocket and looked at them. She knew she couldn't keep it, but also knew JC would never take the car back. She leaned her head back against the door as she heard JC pull out of the parking lot, tires screaming. She tried to wipe the tears from her eyes, but they kept coming. Finally, after several minutes, she pulled herself up; found a Kleenex to wipe her eyes and nose. She placed the keys on the table by the door and quickly picked up the grocery bags and placed them haphazardly in her refrigerator. As she walked to the bedroom, she undid her jeans and stepped out of them. She crawled into bed and pulled the covers up around her chin and tried to forget the kiss she has just shared with JC.
