[Comments - 10]
- Text Size +
Table of Contents
Share Chapter:
Printer Chapter or Story Microsoft Word Chapter or Story
Story Notes:
I was bored one day ...and I just started writing this. Hope y'all enjoy it.
Author's Chapter Notes:
I have pictures of all the characters, I'll bring them to you later on in the story. =)
Chapter One – The Boss, the Boyfriend, and The Ex

When I woke up today I didn’t feel like anything out of the ordinary was going to happen. I got up around 7:45 this morning, per usual, showered, and grabbed a quick bite to eat with my cousin Rachael at Griddle Café. This is by far the best place to get breakfast. If you’ve never tried the Apple Cobbler French Toast you really need to. It’s amazing. After that, I lounged around on the couch for a couple hours dozing on and off to the Sports Channel.

It’s the simple things that I love about being able to take a break, when I’m not scheduled to make any appearances anywhere. I don’t have to do shit but relax. If I don’t want to be seen I don’t have to be. If I feel like a little attention it’s as easy as taking a stroll outside or going for a ride somewhere. The downside of that would be that even when I don’t want the attention, but I want to go somewhere, I have to involuntarily volunteer myself to it. It’s hard going back into the spotlight. All of the fucking media attention and having to do shit all of the time, it can get the best of anyone.

As I was saying, my day started off normal enough. Jess called me around noon, asking me to stop by her house while she talked with one of her applicants to be her new assistant. I wasn’t planning on doing anything else that required leaving the house, but she really wanted my opinion on the girl, saying something along the lines of ‘You’re a good judgement of character’, so I figured it wouldn’t kill me to go do that real quick. I called Trace on the way out so I could swing by his place to pick him up, then maybe after we could go do something.

It’ll be good for me to go over there. Jessica and I haven’t spent much time together, what with her finalizing everything to go to Texas to film some low budget indie film. I’m waiting for her to ask me to tag along. She always does. For some reason she thinks I enjoy sitting around on the set watching some boring ass film being made that won’t even make it to theaters. Now, that’s not to say that Jess can’t act, because she does have talent, but she always picks the lowest parts that don’t amount to anything to side step being type cast.

When I let Trace and myself into Jessica’s house, she and her agent Kim Hodgert were sitting on the couch animatedly talking about something that caused a laugh to emit from Jess.

“Hey y’all,” I let my presence be known, walking over to Jessica to plant a kiss on her cheek.

“Hey,” Trace included.

“What’s going on?” I asked.

“Nothing, just waiting for our appointment to show up,” Kim glanced at her watch with an irritated sigh.

I couldn’t help but wonder if they had been waiting for a long time. By the looks of things, a platter of hors d’oeuvres sitting in the middle of the coffee table half eaten and a couple bottles of water surrounding it gone it had to have been awhile.

“We’ve been sitting here for almost two hours,” Jess answered my unasked question as I took a seat on the love seat cater corner to them.

“Two hours?” Trace questioned with surprise.

“Yeah, it looks like she might be a no show. How have you been, Trace?” Kim smiled softly at Trace as he took the seat next to me. “I haven’t seen you in awhile.”

“I’ve been busy with the clothing line and living life, you know?”

“Yeah, I know what you mean. I’ve been pretty busy myself,” she admitted. “You look really great. Lose some weight?”

“It’s so nice of you to notice!” He fluttered his eyelashes playfully, swatting his hand bashfully towards her. “Yeah, I started working out with Justin a little while ago.”

“Yeah,” I interjected playfully, “When I first got him in the gym he couldn’t even jog on the treadmill for longer than ten minutes at a time. Now he beats my ass on it.”

“I never liked working out much,” he admitted honestly. “But Justin goes to the extreme with it sometimes.”

“Hey now,” I pouted. “I just like being fit, and not having to worry about feeling bad when I go for that extra piece of cake, or two, or twelve.”

“Anyway,” Trace shook his head at me. “Even if I don’t look better, I certainly feel better. And I like that.”

“And how have you been, Justin?”

“I can’t complain. I haven’t seen you in awhile, though. I think the last time I saw you …” I trailed off trying to remember.

“It was at Jessica’s last charity event,” Kim reminded me.

“Oh yeah,” I snapped my finger with a nod. “You haven’t been over working yourself have you?”

“God no, you know I don’t do anymore work than I absolutely have to,” she joked with a wink. “No but, I’ve just been begging and groveling trying to find your girlfriend a job.” She nudged Jessica lightheartedly, causing Jessica to shake her head with a smile.

“It has been hard, but hopefully this movie in Texas will earn some publicity,” she shrugged her shoulders rather gloomily.

“I’m sure it will, babe,” I encouraged positively.

I’m confident in her abilities, but I still think she needs to pick better roles. And it’s not like the roles aren’t offered to her, she just wants to pick things that have a deeper meaning with more creative thought put into it, which nine times out of ten means they’re not going to be critically acclaimed box office hits. You can’t tell her anything. I guess I do understand, because when it comes to my music I don’t want to hear anything that conflicts with my thoughts or feelings either. But I do know that to make progress you have to do some shit you don’t like sometimes.

“I hope so. I’m going to try my hardest, and the promotion is supposed to be really groovy this time, so …” She trails off when her eyes look down towards the floor. I can tell she’s in a vulnerable state right now, and when she gets like that there’s nothing that you can do to change it.

I nodded my response before asking, “So, y’all have really been sitting here for over an hour?”

Kim nodded. “And it’s only because I talked to the woman over the phone and she seems really great for the job. Plus, she really sounds like someone Jessica could click with. I would hate to miss out on that because she decided not to come out. I know she lives all the way on the other side of L.A, so hopefully that’s the reason.”

So there we sat for an extra thirty minutes talking amongst ourselves. Obviously punctuality was not this person’s strong suit if it were she would’ve had the courtesy to show up on time or call for that matter. I know that if it had been me waiting this long – this would’ve been completely unacceptable. I would’ve had my decision fifteen minutes after the time she was supposed to be here. Knowing Kim, I know that she’s thinking the same thing, but Jess can be such a push over sometimes I’m sure she convinced Kim to wait it out.

I was talking to Trace when the doorbell chimed through the house letting us know that our waiting had not been in vain. I was in the middle of a sentence about a new design for the clothing line when the last person I expected to ever see again came through the door wearing a navy blue dress that clung to her frame perfectly, her neckline dipped slightly exposing her creamy light brown skin, light ruffles circled the bottoms of the sleeves as well as the bottom of the dress which stopped at knee length. Her heels clicked and clacked from the front door into the living room where she stopped dead in the middle, regret written all over her face. I recognized the mocha skinned woman as well, her head was bent slightly intensely texting away on her sidekick. She was dressed down wearing a pair of loose sweats and a white t-shirt, her ponytail hidden under a baseball cap.

My eyes shifted over to Trace who had to do a thirty take before settling his perturbed eyes on mine. I could only shrug dumbfounded, completely discombobulated by these two showing up in the most random place to ever pop up into my life after so long. I’m sure my eyes were as wide as they possibly could be, popping out of my skull and shit. But what the fuck?

“I am so sorry,” she began apologizing profusely. “There was this huge accident on the highway, and then I had to turn around and Google different directions to get here, in the midst of all of that my phone died.” Her hands went every which way as her apologies rambled on in a blubbery mess. “I am so very sorry to keep y’all waiting,” the southern twang in her voice was very prominent.

Jessica’s smile was warm and understanding as she stood to shake her hand. “It’s okay. It happens. I’m Jessica Biel. I know we haven’t formally met, but I’ve heard a lot of great things about you.”

“Kelsi Daniels,” she introduced herself as, extending a dainty manicured hand towards Jessica.

“I want to introduce you to my agent Kim Hodgert. I believe you two talked on the phone a couple times.”

“It’s nice to finally meet you, Kelsi.” Kim smiled genuinely while taking Kelsi’s hand in hers. It’s hard to believe that only seconds earlier she was beyond annoyed.

“The same, Kim,” Kelsi smiled brightly, a set of dimples appearing deep in her cheeks. Those dimples …those dimples can be the downfall to any man, trust me I know. She has gorgeous teeth, and when she smiles it literally sets off an entire room. Her smile is one of her best features, and that’s saying a lot because there’s nothing on her body that isn’t damn near perfect. “I appreciate you guys allowing me to bring someone along with me. This is my friend Keisha Walker,” she smiled to her left towards Keisha who finally tore herself away from her phone long enough to shake hands with Jessica and Kim before excusing herself to text feverishly again.

“Kelsi, I’d like to introduce you to my boyfriend Justin Timberlake.” Kelsi’s smile fell completely from her face when she turned to me. I guess she remembered where she was, because she quickly grinned tightly as I stood to greet her. Her dimples were still there, but they were fainter, and they never were if her smile was genuine. This was the first time since Keisha set foot in here that she shut the screen to her sidekick and dropped it into her purse. Her eyes traveled between me and Kelsi, but she didn’t say anything. “Get used to him, because if you’re hired you will be seeing his face more than you want to.”

Kelsi blinked rapidly, her face blank.

“Hi …Mr. Timberlake,” she made no effort to shake my hand that was extended between us.

“Just call me Justin. It’s nice to meet you, Kelsi.” I decided to play along, my eyes never leaving hers. If she wanted to pretend like she didn’t know me, then I wasn’t going to make a big deal about it. We could play this game if she really wanted to. I knew it would be my place to bring this kind of information to the surface, but it’d be better that Jessica not know all the sordid details. “You too, Keisha,” I called out to her friend who stood there like she wished she could be anywhere else.

The way Kelsi’s eyes were burning into my skin – I wish I could’ve been anywhere but there.

“Please, have a seat,” Jessica pointed over to the chair that Keisha was leisurely sitting across the arm of. I was very aware of Kelsi’s uncomfortable vibe, hell I was uncomfortable. But Jessica didn’t seem to notice anything out of the ordinary, which again was probably for the best.

So Kelsi sat; legs scooted close together, her clutch purse laid across her lap with her hands gripping on to it firmly. Her eyes never left the vicinity of Kim and Jess. However, my eyes couldn’t leave her sight. They were magnetically drawn to her no matter how hard I tried to look away. The disbelief of her being all up in my space was more than my body could handle, more than my mental state could handle.

“Kelsi, do you have your resume with you?” Kim asked.

“Yes, I do,” Kelsi mumbled distractedly, turning to Keisha who handed her the piece of paper that I wasn’t aware was in her hands. She then passed it over to Kim who looked over it with an extremely impressed look on her face. “It says here that you interned for Donald Trump …how was that?” Kim handed the resume over to Jessica before giving her full attention back to Kelsi.

“I really loved working for Mr. Trump. It was a great learning experience for me. He’s a very busy man, so with so much going on in his life I really got a front seat ride on how busy things can become. And you know, it was fun being apart of a team that was responsible for putting some structure in to his life. I know he puts on a tough front, and he wants everyone to think he’s this real tough cookie, but he was really sweet …and he taught me a lot. He took me under his wing I guess you could say. He coached me on a lot of things that I don’t think I could’ve learned anywhere else.”

“If I were to call Donald Trump right now,” Kim laughed as soon as the words came out of her mouth. Like you can just pick up the phone and dial Donald Trump whenever you want. He has to easily be the hardest man to contact personally. “Do you think he’d have anything negative to say about you?”

“Over all, I don’t think so,” she replied honestly. “I was always on the job one hundred percent every time. I don’t give anything less that I wouldn’t want to receive back. I guess the only thing I could think of …that he might have some things to harp on would be …” She pursed her lips in thought, probably trying to figure out how to put her words together. “My attitude can get the best of me sometimes.”

“How so?” Jessica chimed in, never looking away from the resume in her hands.

“Well …I can handle tough situations really well. I mean, I’m good in really hectic, fast paced, time sensitive situations – but as I’m sure you know when things start to get really chaotic, negativity has a way of getting the best of you. I completely shut down in that type of environment, you know, when everybody’s vibe is horrible including my own. I become the ugliest bitch, excuse my language,” she chuckled when Kim and Jessica laughed, “That you would never want to meet. Mr. Trump and I …we clashed a lot in that way, because even though, as I said before, he really is a sweet guy …he, too has his own way of thinking. We bumped heads a few times, but I try to keep it professional unless it totally gets the best of me. But, I’m not perfect and I would never claim to be. I guess the only thing I can say to that is that you take the good with the bad.”

“And you’d rather we find out about the bad now instead of learning about it unexpectedly later …” Jessica nodded, understanding where she was coming from.

“Right! I just don’t want to build up any false hope, because …I’m going to screw up sometimes, not very often but it does happen. But what I can say to you on that is that when it does happen I will do everything in my power to resolve whatever situation.

“I like a person that can make a mistake, know they made the mistake, and then try their best to fix it. I really admire people like that, because it’s not an easy thing to do. To even admit to a mistake is pretty difficult, especially on the job.”

“Yeah, it is pretty difficult,” Kelsi agreed with a couple nods of her head. “But I always try my best so that it doesn’t even come to that point of me having to fix it.”

“I’m sure already know the regular responsibility that goes along with this job. Jessica’s life can be really busy at times, and there are going to be times where she’s flying all over everywhere for business reasons,” Kim explained. “Or just to get some peace and quiet on a little get away trip. Mostly you would be flying back and forth from New York to L.A whenever she may need you, but let’s say if you get the job, she’s about to fly out to Texas for a three month period filming a movie …would you be able to handle that in such short notice?”

“I’m very adapting to things like that. That’s why I always make sure to leave my home phone number, my cell number, my email,” she chuckled lightly. “Whatever my boss needs to reach me by will be available to them. I understand and have accepted the fact that my job is on call and that whenever you need me I have to be available. So, rest assured that when you need me on the next plane out I will be ready, Ipod in hand to go wherever I need to.”

“Alright,” Jessica leaned over, crossing her arms over her legs to look at Kelsi. “Let’s say, I’m PMSing,” that caused all of the females to laugh. Trace and I shifted uncomfortably in our seats. It’s not that it grosses me out. I mean, it’s a natural process of being a woman. I just don’t want to have to hear about the shit. There are certain things that females don’t need to know about men, and then there are certain things that men don’t need to know about females. This is at the top of my list of do not need nor do I want to know. “And let’s say that I drag you out of bed, hair looking a mess, in your PJs to go across town to get me a Strawberries and Crème frap. Would you be okay with that?”

“Luckily, I know what it’s like to be a female and to have cravings. So, you better believe that I might be cursing you out on the drive there and back but you’ll have your Strawberries and Crème. There won’t be any verbal complaints,” she cracked with a grin.

As long as I’ve known Kelsi she’s always known to work a room. Always. She’s always been cunning and charming – she could work the pants off of any dude or a girl. It didn’t matter. I could tell that she was gradually becoming more comfortable in the setting. I guess she was blocking me out all together, and that’s fine. I didn’t expect her to greet me with open arms. Hell, truth be told I never expected to see her again.

But here she is …

“Well Kelsi, I think I’ve heard all I needed to hear. What about you, Jessica?”

“Yeah,” she nodded with her agreement. “Kim and I are going to take a quick break in the kitchen to discuss everything. I hope you don’t mind sitting here for a second,” Kelsi shook her head that she didn’t. “Great. I don’t think it’ll take too long.” Jessica jerked her head for me to follow the two of them into the kitchen.

What to do?

*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*

Oh my fucking God! Can someone please tell me how my life has become such a clusterfuck?

Today started out shitty enough, and guess what? It’s not getting any better. I woke up an hour late, my curling iron apparently died in its sleep, so I ended up having to flat iron my hair. Well, I did not have a flat iron hair outfit ready, so that took me some time to acquire. Time that I did not have. My best friend Keisha was supposed to come pick me up but her car broke down on the way, so I had to go get her instead. I took the express way to get here faster, not bothering to watch the News like I always do, if I had I would’ve known that there was a big fucking accident that caused the entire shit to be blocked off! On top of that, when I was trying to call Jessica and Kim my cell phone died. I guess I forgot that I had taken my car charger out a couple nights ago for whatever reason.

Fast forward to actually making it here, and I come to find out that my very, very, very, very, very distant ex boyfriend is my soon to be boss’ (if I get hired) current boyfriend. Isn’t that fucking fabulous? Isn’t that just saw your own legs off, bite your tongue and swallow it fantastic?

Yeah, not.

I don’t know if he was as shocked to see me as I was to see him, but …I just can’t believe it. And I thought that I had left all of my feelings in the past – I’m sure that I did. But all of the anger that was left with me when I saw him last is starting to resurface. And I assure you that I’m over it. I’m so far over it that I can’t even see the shit anymore, but …I can still feel it deep down in the very pit of my stomach. I think seeing him so unexpectedly, shell shocked my feelings so they don’t know what the fuck they want to feel.

I guess I’ll go on and give the reader’s digest of my relationship with Justin.

Justin and I grew up in Memphis together. My parents literally still live down the street from his parents. I knew Justin before he moved off to be on The Mickey Mouse Club, and way before millions of girls around the world were screaming his name. He, Trace, and I were three peas in a pod that could not be separated. We did everything together.

I was a real tom boy when I was a kid and Justin really liked that about me. When we got to middle school I was still as much of a tom boy as I had ever been I just had the grace of a girl and the boobs, and that’s what Justin really liked about me. We developed little crushes on each other, nothing that we pursued, because like I said he was shipped of to start filming the show and we didn’t really know how to handle it. By the time I got half way through high school Justin started touring the world with his musical group *NSYNC, and any talks we shared about being an item soon dispersed for his career. I understood, of course, because it was something he was so genuinely passionate about. I wouldn’t want to stand in the way of that.

Justin started dating Britney Spears while I dated someone from our home town. In all honesty, that whole situation never boded well with me. I would’ve waited on pins and needles for Justin, but he made it abundantly clear that he was with Britney, was in love with Britney, and that I needed to find someone I could feel that way about. I had no other choice but to respect his decision, so Justin and I remained long distant friends until the whole thing with him and Britney went down. He found out about her cheating several months before they broke up publically. I remember he called me one night to talk and before I knew it I was on a private jet in the middle of the night to So Cal to spend the remaining time on the Celebrity tour with him. Yeah, he had it like that even back in the day with *NSYNC. Something clicked inside the both of us when we were actually able to spend that time together to revisit our feelings and what we wanted out of each other. It was a good way to get to know each other again without any outside relationship distractions. Our intimate friendship picked back up again, and we actually started dating exclusively.

The whole reason why it never made headline news was because his record label thought it would be hurtful to his career if anyone knew he was dating a black girl. Yeah, Johnny Wright, a successful black man – he was apart of the whole decision. So, I stayed tucked away in my own little corner, seen only in the public eye as Justin’s close friend. It was kind of weird, because I was photographed a lot by the paparazzi with Justin all hours of the night and nobody ever questioned anything. They automatically assumed I was his friend. I know I’m not an ugly girl, people tell me all the time, so I don’t know why it was so easy to dismiss me as that. It hurt, it hurt a lot, and it hurt our relationship a lot. The one thing that hurt the most is that he didn’t even stick up for me, not once. I don’t know how it is now, or how he is, but back then he would do anything for his career. That was his main goal in life, and it didn’t matter to him whether or not it hurt anyone else, just so long as Justin Timberlake’s image was not compromised in any way.

The whole race fiasco really took a toll on us especially when rumors came flying each and every way about Justin and some other celebrity chick getting busy somewhere. And it wasn’t like the stories were once a month, they were coming every which way several times a week. But I trusted Justin. I trusted him through it all, even through the Cameron Diaz rumors. And even though he started dating her right after we broke up, I still didn’t think he cheated on me with her.

He did cheat on me, however, with someone – one time that I know of. I don’t know her name, and I never got to see her face, but there was something extremely familiar about her. She flew out of the room so fast that all I got to see was her retreating form before I laid one into Justin so thick he probably still thinks about it till this day. I had been so physically and emotionally torn down by everything that went on in our relationship that one night with that nameless woman was the nail in the coffin. I broke all ties with Justin that night, we never talked again, and that was some time in ’04.

The breakup hurt a lot at the time. I dived heavily into college, so that helped. He was my first real relationship, before him I dated here and there but nothing that was ever as substantial. I really gave a fighting chance for Justin and he blew that shit away like he didn’t care at all about me, and maybe he didn’t. That’s not true. I know that he cared for me. We were friends from the beginning; of course he had love for me, but …maybe he was never in love with me. But the days turned into weeks which turned into months and eventually when I didn’t see his face all the time, and when I stopped checking up on him via the internet it got easier to deal with. The heartache and pain eventually subsided into nothing, then after awhile I didn’t feel anything for him.

That’s why I don’t understand this rage burning up inside of me.

“Can you believe this shit?” Keisha’s harsh whisper brought me spiraling back into reality. I must’ve dazed off, watching the small group huddled in the kitchen as they talk about me.

“No …this is definitely unbelievable shit,” I responded. I can’t take my eyes off of him. He’s grown so much. I know that’s a ridiculous thing to say, considering he was a grown ass man when I left him, but when we parted he was this thugged out white boy with bling in his ears, and now he looked so mature. He seemed so different. It was a totally different person that I didn’t know at all.

“Are you okay?” That question managed to jerk my head in her direction.

“I’m fine,” I snapped rudely. “Why wouldn’t I be?”

“I don’t know,” she shrugged her shoulders lamely.

“I’m fine,” I repeated, this time more softly.

“You look like you’re about to bite someone’s head off.”

“I’m just …tired.” I wasn’t completely lying.

She gave me a look that she didn’t believe it. “I know how you are, Kelsi. I don’t want you to freak out about this.”

“Freak out about what?”

“Working in such close proximities to Justin, I mean.”

“Pssh,” I waved my hand in at her dismissively. “It’s not that big of a deal,” I lied.

“Who are you bullshitting? You and Justin don’t have the best history. If this were a history class you’d both fail.”

“Any feelings I had towards Justin were dead and gone a long ass time ago,” I assured her, also trying to reassure myself in the process. It’s not working so well for me. I mean, I know I not still in love with the dude, I just …I don’t know how I feel. She opened her mouth to speak, “Don’t even start.”

“What?” She batted her eyelashes innocently.

“You were about to screech out the lyrics to Dead and Gone, and that’s the last thing I need right now.”

She chuckled, sitting back and taking out her cell phone to check it. The girl never gets off her phone. “You know me too well.”

“That’s not necessarily a good thing.”

My face scrunched in pain when she viciously pushed my shoulder. “That’s what you get for smarting off when you can’t fully protect yourself.” She was lucky that I wasn’t in a place where I could stick my stiletto heel up her ass. “What did you want to do after this?”

“I’m not sure,” my gaze went back over to Justin who looked at me for a second before turning back to Jessica to say something else to her. I feel so much awkward tension and I think I’m the only one that feels it. I don’t think there’s any actual awkwardness. I’m probably creating it all in my head, but every time I look at him I feel it.

“I’m starving. Do you want to go get something to eat afterwards?”

“I suppose we could,” I told her faintly, unenthusiastically. Truth was I don’t think I could eat anything even if I wanted to.

“Where do you want to eat?” Keisha questioned.

“I don’t know,” I answered distractedly.

“Hmm,” she sounded off behind me as I watched the group walk back in settling into their former seats.

“Sorry to keep you waiting so long,” Jessica apologized.

“It’s no problem, really,” I assured her, offering a smile that I wasn’t really feeling at the time. I just needed to get away from there as soon as possible. I felt caged in all of a sudden. It came out of nowhere.

“We appreciate you coming out here today, Kelsi. We would like to offer you the position, but we do have a few more interviews scheduled for this week. I’ll be sure to get a hold of you at the end of this week with our decision,” Kim informed me.

I smiled graciously, standing on my feet I got my resume off of the table. “I appreciate your time, and thanks for talking with me even after being so incredibly late. I apologize again for that.”

I said my goodbyes to everyone minus Justin and Trace. I didn’t even spare a passing glance their way. I barely talked to them, so there wasn’t any real reason to bid them a farewell. I just needed to get out of that house, man. It was suffocating the shit out of me.

“Kelsi …” I hear Keisha say my name beside me as I back out of Jessica’s parking lot, driving out of her gated community.

“Not now Keisha.” My right hand searches the compartment between our seats for my sunglasses, when I find them I slip them over my eyes then turn the knob on the volume – Lady Gaga’s Just Dance blared through my speakers. As if I needed to hear that damn song anymore. I flipped through my presets only to settle back to Lady Gaga when there isn’t anything else better to listen to.

The drive was quiet for some time as I thought over the reason why they didn’t give me a distinct answer today. I knew it had something to do with Justin. I just knew it. He probably told his beloved girlfriend that I was no good for the job, or some other bullshit that’s completely untrue. They’d call me later to tell me they picked someone better suited for the job, which will be even more bullshit, ‘cause I know I’m good at my job. Nobody ever wants to get rid of me, but I always need a change of pace every now and again, so I switch from celebrity to celebrity every couple of years. Another thing that I learned from Mr. Trump: never stay with one person it’ll only stifle your growth. So, I never stay with someone past a few years, and that’s proven to be quite good for my career.

“You know …” I started, but trailed off.

“What?”

“He did something didn’t he?” I questioned, turning down Kelly Clarkson’s My Life Would Suck Without You. “I bet you his bitch ass said something to her,” I answered my own question.

“What are you talking about Kelsi?”

“Justin …he fucking …he did something, man. Why else wouldn’t they tell me if I got the job or not? I’ve never gone to an interview and not know that day whether I got it or not.”

“Not everybody is the same.”

“Yeah, ok,” she did have a point. “But not everyone has my ex-boyfriend manipulating their decision, either,” I explained as I turned on the ramp to get on the highway. “He did something.” I’m so sure of it.

“If you say so,” I see her shake her head in the corner of my eye.

“Okay, so you think …he told her to hire me?”

“I don’t know what he told her. I wasn’t in there. Justin is a lot of things, but I honestly don’t think he’d do that to you.”

“Yeah, well, I wouldn’t put shit past Justin Timberlake.”

“Alright …”

“He’s the devil you know,” I stated matter-of-factly.

“He’s the devil?” I could hear the laughter in her voice, but I was dead serious.

“He is. I mean, he has the face and voice of an angel, but …he’s got horns, dude.”

“Are we going to talk about Justin all day?”

“No,” I answered, turning the radio back on. Commercials filled the air as we drove down the busy highway. Not even five minutes later I had to ask, “But did you see the way he just went along with not even knowing who I was?”

Keisha exhaled, annoyed. “Yeah?”

“You don’t find that shady at all?”

“I don’t find it anymore shady than you pretending not to know him.”

“He’s probably cheating on her ass,” I stated it as more of a fact. Cheaters will always be cheaters. There’s no changing that no matter how good the woman is. “Right under her nose, I bet you.”

Keisha sighed this time, still irritated. “I really don’t want to talk about this,” she told me, leaning her head against the window looking out at the blurry scenery that passed us by.

“Why not?”

“I just don’t. Okay?”

“But why not?” I pushed.

“Because you’re bitter!” She finally yelled, looking in my direction.

I scoffed. “I really am not bitter,” I tried to laugh, but it was stuck in my throat.

“But you are, Kelsi. You really are. You have been for the longest time.”

“I’m not bitter,” I repeated strongly. “I don’t have any reason to be bitter. What happened …happened. You can’t change the shit.”

“Okay then, if you know that why are you still dwelling on it?”

“I’m not.”

“Let’s keep it all the way real with each other; you didn’t know that Justin was dating Jessica when you applied for this job?”

“First of all, I never applied to this job,” I responded smartly. “They found my resume and called me. Secondly, if I knew that Justin was dating her I wouldn’t have even accepted the interview.”

“Yeah, okay,” she said in disbelief.

“What?”

“I find it hard to believe that you didn’t know. The whole world knows about Justin Timberlake, whether you want to or not.”

“Keisha, you know damn well that I’ve been going out of my way not to hear anything about him. I barely read magazines anymore; I don’t watch a lot of TV, at least nothing that has to do with him. I created a black hole, and I sucked him into it. I swear I never knew that Jessica Biel was with him. The last time I heard anything about him, he was still with Cameron.”

“You just need to realize that maybe you’re not over Justin like you want to believe you are.”

“It’s been four years, Keisha,” I glanced at her. “There’s no way I could be hanging on to something for that long.”

“And why not? Last time I checked there wasn’t a time limit to how long it takes for your heart to heal. And that’s fine, because you really loved him. I know. I get it. But he’s a piece of shit, and you …you need to get over it and him. He wasn’t worth your time then, and he’s certainly not worth it now.”

“I never said he was worth my time.”

“Then why do you keep harping on it then? Who gives a fuck what Justin did or did not tell her? It’s ultimately Jessica’s decision anyway, right?” Not knowing if the question was rhetorical or not I nodded my head anyway. “Right and your interview went great, so I don’t see why you’re obsessing over it.”

“I’m hardly obsessing.” I couldn’t see her, but I knew she was giving me a look. “I’m just discussing. You never liked him, though,” I remembered out loud.

“I know a dog when I see a dog,” was all she said to that.

“But you disliked him prematurely.”

“I had a damn good reason, though, didn’t I?” Keisha scoffed incredulously. “It’s been how many years? And you’re still defending his ass like you’re with him.”

“I’m not defending him!” I screeched offensively. I’ve been insulting him since we got in the car. I wouldn’t defend him for shit, but she always voiced her opinions on how much she couldn’t stand Justin. And yeah, she did have a reason, but she didn’t know that at the time. “Let’s not talk about this anymore.” I turned the volume back up, even louder this time, drowning out any thoughts or discussions that could be left to talk about.

“Where do you want to eat?” Keisha yelled over the music.

“I think …I’m going to drop you off at home.” I informed her indifferently after turning the radio down so she could hear me. “I don’t really feel like eating anymore.”

*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*

“Kelsi looked damn good today,” Trace voiced absentmindedly as he stared at the football game we were watching at my house. We were sitting on the couch, a six pack of beer on the table in front of us, and a big bowl of spicy chicken wings positioned between us.

“Yeah,” I agreed honestly, taking a swig from the beer in my hand. She looked fucking amazing, but that wasn’t really anything surprising. I’ve never known her to not look anything but her best, even when she wasn’t trying. She’s the only female I’ve ever seen wake up straight out of bed looking like she’s ready to be in a photo shoot.

“Do you think it was a good idea to encourage Jess to hire her on?” Trace wondered.

“I don’t know, man,” I shrugged, resting my elbow on the top of couch, my head falling into my hand. “Part of me thinks that …what happened between us was a long ass time ago, and that now maybe we can start over with a clean slate. But another part of me knows that the look in her eyes – it can only end in disaster.”

“If you feel that way, maybe it’s not such a good idea.”

“But at the same time I don’t want to stop her from doing something that she wants to do. I don’t want to get in the way of shit for her, because she never got in the way of anything for me.”

Trace nodded. “Yeah, and besides, Kelsi was always the level headed one. Out of the three of us, she was always thinking with her head before actually doing something. I don’t think she’d put herself into a situation that she couldn’t handle.”

“That’s the thing about her, though. She thinks she can handle everything, until the shit gets too much to where she has to succumb to the fact that she can’t handle it. Then she freaks the fuck out, and when she freaks out it’s not good.”

“Sounds like someone I know,” Trace smirked.

“I don’t freak out, dude.”

“Okay,” he shook his head with a short laugh. “If you say so.”

“Anyway …we’re not talking about me,” I reminded him. “But, personal issues aside, she gave a good interview.”

“Hell yeah.”

“I feel like I should call her myself.”

Trace raised an eyebrow. “Why?”

“I don’t …really know. I just feel like I should. My ex girlfriend just had an interview with my girlfriend …and I was there to watch over it. I need to …I have to find out where her head is.”

“I think that’s the last thing you should do,” he replied honestly.

“Why?”

“She’s not working for you, Justin. She doesn’t even need to interact with you unless she wants to, and judging by the dirty looks she gave you when she actually did look at you I don’t think you need to worry about it. She’ll probably go on ignoring you like you don’t exist.”

That did sound like her.

“We’re about to be in Texas together for three fucking months,” I told him indignantly. “You think she’s going to ignore me that whole time?”

“Jess finally asked you to go with her?”

“Yeah,” I confirmed unexcitedly. “You should come, for real. The shits going to be hella boring.”

“Why don’t you tell her ‘no’?” Trace questioned.

“Because she’s my girl, and no matter how I feel about it I’m going to support her. That’s what significant others do for one another,” I sighed. “But answer my question.”

“If Kelsi is anything like she used to be, then yeah, she’s going to try her hardest to pretend like you’re six feet under and not right in her face.” I frowned deeply at that admission. “Why are you frownin’ for?”

“No reason …” I replied, the frown spreading across my face like a plague.

“Yeah okay,” he said doubtfully. I watched as he grabbed a wing from the bowl and dipped it in ranch sauce. “You’re something else,” he chuckled before taking a huge bite.

“How?” I placed my beer bottle on a coaster on the coffee table before leaning back into my seat again.

“Because it’s been years, literally, and you’re still on her ass.”

“Why?” I shook my head. “Because I want to make sure we can be civilized with each other before making a decision that could hurt her again, or quite possibly Jessica?”

“Nothing would hurt Jessica if you would just tell her the fucking truth,” he supplied logically.

“Jessica has some strong jealous tendencies.”

“Jess?” He questioned, not really believing me.

“Yeah.”

“I’ve never seen her act any other way but …normal and subdued about everything.”

“That’s because she’s not going to show you. Trust me, though, she is very jealous. If I tell her that Kelsi and I were in a serious relationship at one time she’ll never hire her. I don’t want that kind of guilt on my chest. I have enough when it comes to her. Kelsi deserves this job if she wants it, and I’m not going to stop her from getting it.”

“If you have to think this hard about anything then it’s obviously not a good idea,” he looked at me, picking through the wing pieces to get a peg leg. “My point is that whether or not Kelsi gets this job shouldn’t have anything to do with you. Jessica needs to make this decision on her own, considering she’s going to be spending the most time with her, but she should know all of the particulars before deciding. As far as you and Kelsi are concerned …I think you need to leave it in ’04 where it’s been.”

“But that’s the thing Trace,” I began tirelessly. “I didn’t leave our friendship back there, she did. She wanted nothing to do with me, not the other way around. I still wanted her in my life, but she couldn’t deal, and it’s not like I blame her, ‘cause …I treated her like shit back then. But …we used to be damn good friends. All of us. Don’t you miss her?”

“Of course I do. Hell, we all grew up together. I have a lot of love for Kelsi, and that’s why I think you need to mind your own business and let her do her thing. If she wanted anything to do with you, you would know. Obviously she’s fine with her life and without you in it.”

The truth hurts sometimes, because that was hard to hear, but maybe he was right. Still …

“I don’t know, Trace. All I do know is that when she walked in that door all I could think about is all the good memories I had with her before all the bad shit intervened.”

“You mean before you fucked up,” he was too honest sometimes.

“I was a different person back then. We both were. Our relationship was fucked up from the get go because we had so many outsiders commenting on it. But our friendship …I thought that would’ve at least lasted. And it didn’t. I didn’t even get to fight for it, because I was so far into my own shit …I didn’t,” I paused. “It’s not that I didn’t care …I just cared about my shit more at the time.”

Trace frowned. “And that’s why I think you need to leave it alone. ‘Cause I was there, remember? I saw how bad it hurt her. So, as far as this thing here goes …you can be civilized, but if she wants you in her life like that she will let you know. You already know that, though. You just want to speed up a process that you think will inevitably happen, just because y’all are going to be around each other. But if you know Kelsi at all, you know it doesn’t work that way with her.” He was speaking some real shit right then, even if I didn’t want to hear it. “And also, I really think you need to tell Jessica about everything. If she does end up going with Kelsi it’s going to end up coming out anyway, and by then it’s going to be worse off for everyone involved.”

“But it’s not like I’m lying to Jess. I’m just not …telling her.”

“Same shit,” he shrugged. “But you’re going to do what you want.”

“Hey Trace, I’m listening. I just …”

“You want to do what you want to do?” Or what you feel like you should do? Or however you’re spinning it in your head to fit the situation.” He figured me out that quickly.

“Kelsi Daniels is not someone who just leaves your life and you forget about her that easily. She leaves an impact on you …”

“Okay and you left an impact on her, and not a good one. Stop thinking about yourself, hell, stop thinking about Kelsi. Think about Jessica, your girlfriend, someone you haven’t even hurt yet.”

He was right. He was so right, but even so …that didn’t change the fact that the harder I tried to think about Jessica the easier it was for Kelsi to pop into my head. Why else would she drop into my life like this so out of the blue if there wasn’t a purpose for it?

“You’re right,” I finally agreed coolly. “I’m just going to leave it alone.”


You must login (register) to comment.

Story Tags: Be the first to add a tag to this story