24. Me, you...and then there's 'us'

A Few Days Later

Boston, MA

July...

I'd like to think that I'm a reasonable guy and that I can handle just about anything that comes my way.

I'm patient when I need to be and take things with good stride usually, but this time goes without saying that I'm just about ready to flip.

It's as if everything is the same and nothing has changed.

And by that I mean, yeah you guessed it, a certain miss Delilah Marshall.

After that night we...you know...‘hooked up' or whatever you want to call it, I'm not big on labeling it, the next day, it was almost like nothing happened. Almost.

I know Delilah, so when we joined her family in the dining room for breakfast that morning, I could sense the subtle change in her. She was a little jumpy, a little edgy, but mostly she looked happy. She was...glowing. And it made me feel damn good to know I was the cause of that. Still, that didn't change a thing. If anything, she was the same Lilah with me. I mean, I didn't expect much from her, I really didn't because she's well, herself. But, shit, I expected something...anything. Maybe some type of affection or a softer side considering I blatantly admitted to being in love with her. That was not easy for me to do by the way.

I could have easily set myself up for disaster but I didn't care because all I saw, all I still see, is her.

I admire the heck out of Lilah, I do, but I can't quite put my finger on why she enjoys being so fucking exasperating almost all the time.

And that's putting it mildly because dealing with her is emotionally, psychologically and sometimes even physically draining.

But I care too much to walk away. I believe in her a little too much which is why I put up with her and why I'm sticking around.

Besides, I've invested too much of my time and effort in her to give up now. I know I'm getting through to her. I know, without a shadow of a doubt that I'm getting through that thick, stubborn head of hers. Hell if I wasn't, we wouldn't be here right now, animatedly arguing over the Red Sox Vs. Yankees game we just came from seeing at the baseball stadium.

I'd like to think we've come a long way as friends but I'm sure the process would have moved along a lot smoother if Delilah wasn't well, Delilah.

But then where would we be? If she wasn't herself, I might not have taken such interest in her or taken up this almost impossible challenge of trying to get through to her and possibly finding and pulling out the amazing woman I know she's hiding somewhere beneath her shell and many layers.

But I digress. Because despite all of that, I still somehow managed to fall in love with her. And while I feel like that's going to be my undoing and the cause of my many mood swings, heartaches and fights in the near future, I'm ok with it.

I can't quite put my finger on it, but I'm totally copasetic with roughing the elements of our dysfunctional relationship if it means I get to experience the good with the bad.

"We're both Red Sox fans yet you're backing the Yankees because you think the Sox shouldn't have gotten that homerun?" I question with a chuckle.

Lilah can be so confusing sometimes I swear. But she's still cute.

"No, it's not that it's just...the Yankees could have stopped that homerun easily."

"Yes, if they were paying attention and caught and passed the ball like they should have at the bases."

"Whatever...I'm just saying. I'm still happy the Sox won though." Lilah shrugs as she shifts behind the steering wheel before switching lanes at the light.

"I get it, but it was still a pretty close game." I voice.

"Yes, I had fun." She smiles before pulling at her Red Sox cap which matches the one I'm wearing.

No, I'm not into the whole matching couples thing. I just thought it would be cool to get us some memorabilia.

"I had fun too. Thanks for coming out with me. I thought for sure you would have told me to go with Marco or something." I quip and she giggles in return.

"I thought about it, but then what kind of friend would I be?"

"Not a very good one. Not that your brother isn't cool, but he scares me sometimes." I laugh and Lilah nods in agreement.

"Yup, he can be a hard ass. But he means well."

It's true. Marco has this badass thing about him that can be intimidating. He doesn't flaunt it, but it's there.

"So, what are we doing for the rest of the day? Had anything in mind?" I ask Lilah, keeping my focus on her as she keeps her focus on the road.

I smile lightly, resting back in my seat as I gaze out at the window, taking in the many Boston sights and smells as we head back to her home.

"No, I'm blank." She voices with a light yawn.

"You're tired." I point out, glaring at her.

"It's been a long day."

"It has." I agree, gauging her reactions.

"How about we stay in tonight and just laze around? I don't know what everyone else is doing but I'm down for kicking back with a DVD or something." Lilah suggests.

I think for a minute, liking the sound of that, but I feel like we should be doing a little more considering my time here is quickly coming to an end.

I know Lilah's still hesitant about my life outside of Higher Heights, but all she has to do is come down to visit me like she promised and I'll be sure to catch her up to speed and show her that there's nothing to be skeptical about. Behind all of my fame and status and whatnot, I'm still just me.

"You know, I'm going back to Cali in a few days." I mention, my eyes fixated on Lilah's frame.

She tenses slightly, her grip on the steering wheel tightening as she turns down on the street where her home is situated.

"I know." She mutters and I frown at her before looking away.

"And, I was thinking, maybe we could go out to dinner instead." I say softly.

No response.

If I didn't know better, I'd say she's intentionally ignoring me, but as we near her home, I'm realizing that her lack of reply is simply from distraction.

My reaction is immediate, my calm mood slowly slipping away as we pull up behind a silver Acura.

Lilah quickly parks and kills the engine before unbuckling her seatbelt to bolt from the ride.

I on the other hand remain seated, my blues narrowing slightly as I take in the sight of Marco and Ryan talking just at the foot of the driveway.

This should be interesting.

Marco's expression is unpleasant whereas Ryan's own is almost pleading. I look at them with curiosity as Lilah intervenes, stepping between the two of them with her back to her brother as she faces Ryan.

I should probably stay out of whatever family issues they're having now since I'm already in way too deep as it is. But, ignoring my logical side, I undo my seatbelt and swipe my palms over my jeans and red t-shit before inhaling deeply and exiting the jeep.

The moment my door slams shut, everyone's attention is diverted in my direction and I bow my head slightly, averting their gaze.

"What the fuck is Justin doing here?" Ryan speaks up, stepping away from Delilah and walking towards me.

Marco quickly blocks his path, giving Ryan a light shove in the chest.

"Chill out Ry, Justin's here visiting." Marco speaks up.

"Visiting?" Ryan questions, looking at his cousin with heated eyes. "You mean visiting Delilah? So this is why you suggested I stayed with one of my friends for the next few days? This is the guest you all have over why I can't come home? It's my home too you know. You're kicking me out for Justin?" Ryan snaps.

I didn't see that one coming.

"No shithead. We don't have any space. None of the rooms are made up. You have nowhere to fucking sleep Ry. Justin got the only extra room that was available. Give us a few days and we'll get your room made up. You know mom and dad and their house makeover bit. No one's here half the time because everyone is off at school during the year. Mom and dad moved our things to make space for storage. They honestly didn't think you'd even be coming home. They thought you would have stayed at Ethan's." Marco explains.

Why does hearing Ethan's name make me feel like punching someone?

"What's wrong with me camping out on the floor or something? Why do I have to leave?" Ryan argues and I can't help but smirk as I shove my hands in my pockets.

"You and Justin don't exactly get along smartass. Mom and dad aren't here right now, so you should go and when they get in you can come back and plead your case. But be ready to tell them everything...and I mean everything that's happened at that fucking boarding school because even today, they still don't know all the horrid details." Marco growls angrily.

"Right. So no matter what you say, this comes back to the fucking celebrity." Ryan hisses as he turns towards me. "You know, Justin, just because I said you weren't so bad and I made sure to stay away from you and not get involved or whatever doesn't mean I'm ok with this...any of this." Ryan voices.

He's one to talk. He's the one who's best friends with the one person trying to screw his family over. I'd tell him this, but I'm not big on conflict right now so I remain silent for the most part.

"Ryan, just go." Lilah says weakly and my eyes flit in her direction.

She looks drained, annoyed and so over this. I can't blame her. I'd be tired too after being surrounded by fuck ups like Ryan and Ethan most of my life.

"Fine. I'll go, but I'll be back." He spits, keeping his focus on me as he pushes Marco out of his way.

"Look Ry, it's not that we don't want you home, we'd just like to lessen the drama where mom and dad are concerned. Understand that. The same way we understand and accept that you're friends with Ethan." Marco voices sternly.

"Family comes first dude." Ryan retorts.

"Really Ryan? Because from where I'm standing, Justin fits that category a lot better than you do right now." Lilah barks and Ryan's eyes widen in shock and offence.

Can't say I'm not stunned by her admittance either. Even Marco seems surprised that his sister would say such a thing.

"We'll see." Ryan speaks calmly. "When I prove you wrong, don't say I never did anything for you Delilah." He states.

With that said, he walks away from us and hops into his Acura, speeding down the street and out of sight.

A low whistle escapes me as I remain in place, not wanting to overstep my boundaries here.

It's hard to figure Lilah out. On one hand, she's insufferable and on the other hand, she ends up doing and saying shit like what she just said to Ryan. It's like she has an imbalance or something.

Marco shakes his head sadly while turning to head back inside. "I'm going to get ready to head out. I'll see you guys later." He mutters before disappearing indoors, leaving Lilah and me alone.

"So..." I finally speak up, walking over to Lilah and gripping her hands in mine, giving them a light squeeze.

"I heard you..." She begins. "What you said earlier about us going out to dinner."

"Oh?" I curve a brow. "If you don't want to..."

"Would you need Mike there with you?" She asks and I sigh.

"Yes, if we're out in public. He'd probably kill me if he found out we went to that baseball game without him. He'll probably find out eventually. I did get noticed by a few fans." I explain.

"Luckily, it was while you were away getting refreshments and nowhere near me." Lilah giggles.

"Yeah, lucky for you. Look, Lilah, I can't hide you from the world forever. I'm not going to. You do know that right?" I question and she nods timidly. "As much as it pains me to say this, we're not a couple or anything, but you are a part of my life. And once I consider you important, the rest of the world is going to want to know you. Not to sound cryptic, but it's a small price to pay because of who I am."

"I, I understand Justin."

"Do you really? I'm not some unsolved mystery Lilah." I smile. "Hey look at me." I pull my hand away so I can grip her chin and lift her head. "I can catch you up to speed with my life, with what it's like being me easily. Just, say the word and you'll know everything you need to know, even more than the public does considering you're part of my inner circle and all." I explain.

"Of course, I know that." She says surely.

"Then why are you so hesitant about everything almost always?" I inquire.

"I don't know...I guess really seeing and embracing you in this celebrity light is going to take some getting used to."

"And I'm ok with that." I grin, causing her to smile in return.

"Alright then. Well, in that case, to save you from being recognized and pulling Mike out to be with us, how about we still have dinner but indoors? I'll cook." Lilah suggests and the smile on my face widens.

"I'm definitely ok with that." I chuckle. "I'll help, it'll be fun." I decide and she nods before leading us towards the entrance of the house...

**

Later

"Remind me again whose idea this was?" Marco asks as he steals from the baked macaroni I just pulled out of the oven.

"Dude, chill with the sticky fingers!" I chuckle, pulling the hot dish away from Marco and placing it on the other side of the table. "And it was Lilah's idea." I point out, stealing a glance at her as she turns off the stove and removes the stewed chicken and vegetables to place on the countertop.

"Hmm, I guess you being here brings out a whole new side of her huh Justin?" Marco voices, eyeing me suspiciously.

"I uh, I'm not following." I say clueless.

"As far as I know, Lili hates cooking." Marco voices.

"I do not Marco." Lilah defends and I take a step back, a soft chuckle escaping me.

"Is that so?" I question. "Funny. When we spent time together back at school, she had no problem hitting the kitchen at my place." I blurt out.

Marco turns and gives me a look and shit, was I not supposed to say that?

"I'm gonna pretend like I didn't hear that." Marco voices with a shake of his head, a half smile shining through his serious expression.

"People can change Marco." Lilah quickly pipes in to sway his attention. "Cooking isn't so bad. I do it when I have to."

"Sure sis, whatever. Listen when mom and dad get in, tell them I'm out. Oh and leave me a plate. Later." Marco voices before placing a chaste kiss on Lilah's cheek and excusing himself to leave.

When he's gone, I breathe a sigh of relief while resting my back against the kitchen counter.

"I'm never going to get used to him." I voice softly and Lilah giggles as she moves to rest next to me.

"Oh, he'll make sure of it too. But, Marco is cool. You know, he's family and I love him." Lilah admits.

"Yeah, I got you." I say, gazing at our surroundings as we wait for the food to cool.

"I meant what I said earlier too Justin. I consider you a part of my family." Lilah adds in and I turn to look at her, taking in her soft gray-browns and the way she fiddles with her blue t-shirt and shorts.

I swallow harshly, folding my arms across my chest as I smile at her when she starts playing with her messy hair. Even now, in her state, I still think she's beautiful. Shit, what's wrong with me?

Blinking rapidly, I look away from her, a deep frown forming on my face when I think of everything I've been through with her and my time at Higher Heights.

"Justin...say something...please?" Lilah whispers, moving to stand before me.

She forces my arms open and steps into my embrace before resting her head on my chest. Seconds later, she pulls me into a hug and I'm just standing there against the kitchen counter, looking down at her, not reciprocating her actions.

"I don't..." I hesitate. "I don't know what to say anymore Lilah. I don't know what you want me to do or say. I don't know how else I can prove to you that you can trust me, that you can confide in me and be yourself with me. You don't have to be so uptight. It's ok to break down your walls. I mean, I'm doing the same with you. I really don't know what you want from me anymore. If me telling and showing you I genuinely love you isn't good enough then..." But she cuts me off, lifting her head to look at me.

"I know you love me Justin." She voices and I nod still looking at her, finally wrapping my arms around her waist.

I wish she'd say it back. But that's all this is right now...wishful thinking.

"Good and don't forget it." I grin.

"And everything you said, you're right. I shouldn't be the way I am with you still. You don't deserve that."

"Then stop it." I say jokingly with a chortle.

"I wish it were that easy. You know the saying old habits die hard? Well, that's me. I spent so many years building up this protective shield, it's like...it's almost like I can't even remember the person I use to be before. It's hard. But, I'm trying." She voices. "If anything, I need to remember to try extra hard with you so I don't push you away or completely drive you crazy in the process like you stated." She smiles and I return the favor, that thread of hope I was longing for finally manifesting.

"That's all I ask." I hum, leaning down to place a soft kiss on her mouth. "Actually..." I pause mid-kiss. "There is something else I've been meaning to ask you."

"What?" Lilah questions, giggling when I start placing feathery kisses on her lips.

"Say you'll be with me, that you'll give us a chance, a real chance?" I ask hopefully, continuing my assault on her lips.

"As in...a couple?" She questions and I hum in response, getting carried away.

"Uh huh..." I breathe out.

"Ok." Lilah mutters and I pause suddenly, pulling away from her.

Her eyes are still closed and her lips are still puckered when I look down at her, an amused smile forming on my face.

"Ok meaning?" I gesture for her to elaborate and her eyes finally flutter open.

"Ok, I'll give us a try."

"You mean that?" I ask, still skeptical that she's going to switch or say 'gottcha' or something.

It can't be that easy, can it?

"Yes Justin. I'm keeping my word. I'm trying extra hard remember? I'll give us a try. And, if things don't work out, then, we could still be friends right?" She beams up at me and I bite the corner of my bottom lip to refrain from voicing my thoughts.

For us to remain friends if we didn't work out would all depend on the reason behind the breakup. But, I'm not going to think about that so I simply nod. ‘

"Sure." I force out, keeping my smile.

Why would she even consider things not working out between us? Hasn't everything we've been through so far proven to her that I'm ready and willing to make things work at all costs?

"So that's it then. Now I'm really gonna have to come out to visit you so you can get me up to speed with your hectic life."

"We'll have fun." I assure her, my thoughts quickly jumping to Jessica at the notion of Lilah coming to Cali.

Shit. I'll have to deal with Jess when I get back and make sure that she gets the picture that we're over loud and clear. The last thing I want if for her to mess things up for me with Lilah.

"Uh huh." Lilah sighs contently and I gaze at her, happy that we were able to get to this point.

I don't think I'll ever tell her this, but Lilah has no idea how many times I came close to giving up. I never could go through with it though. Now, thankfully, I don't have to worry about that anymore.

"You're cute you know that? And you have a gorgeous smile." I coo.

"Hmm, right back at ya." Lilah giggles.

As I lean down, about to kiss her again, we're inconveniently interrupted by the clicking of heels followed by a soft gasp.

"Oh, hello, am I interrupting?"

My eyes widen and my head jerks up and towards the person who just joined us in the kitchen.

I instantly lock eyes with Mrs. Marshall, Delilah's mother and I can feel my ears heat up as embarrassment washes over me.

"Mom? Oh um, no..." Lilah quickly speaks up while detaching herself from me.

She walks over to her mother who's still eyeing me and gives her a quick hug.

"Are you sure sweetie? Because it looked like I walked in on a very intricate moment between you two." Linda voices. "Hello Justin." She smiles widely for me and I duck my head while mindlessly scratching the back of my neck.

"Uh hey, Mrs. Marshall." I say softly.

"Linda's fine." She replies and I look up at her, a coy smile gracing my features when I see the knowing look she's giving me.

"Mom? Where's dad?" Lilah asks, trying to distract her mother but to no avail.

"He's parking the car. He'll be inside shortly. So tell me, what smells so wonderful?" Linda asks while making her way into the kitchen.

She strolls by me and heads over to the food Lilah and I cooked, inhaling deeply.

"We cooked mom." Lilah voices proudly and Linda looks at her daughter in awe before casting her vision in my direction.

"It was all Lilah's idea." I say in defense, still smiling like an idiot.

"Huh...I see. You got my baby in the kitchen. Well, looks like we're going to have to keep you around then Justin...yes?" Linda muses and I shrug in response feeling too awkward to actually speak. "Right, shall we set the table?" Linda adds in, dismissing me as she moves around to do just that.

I continue staring at her in wonderment, trying to make sense of what's happening now.

Lilah walks up to me with a shake of her head as she stares at her mother.

Lowering her voice, she pulls me to the side so her mom won't hear as she whispers to me.

"It's official. My mother loves you." Lilah giggles and I smile at that fact while studying her mother before diverting my attention elsewhere.

"Lucky me then." I finally speak up, even if deep down I'd much rather if Lilah's sentence went more along the lines of I love you instead of my mother loves you.

No need to worry though. I'm sure with time, that'll all change. I'll make sure of it.