"Do you know what I love about you?" Justin asked Aubrey as they lay in bed Saturday morning.  He leaned up on one elbow-resting his head in his hand as he looked down at her. He couldn't resist reaching over with his other hand to caress the small bit of her stomach showing beneath the hem of her T-shirt. 

"What?" She asked.  She giggled as his fingertips moved over her soft skin and squirmed slightly to move away. Reaching down, Aubrey took his hand in an effort to stop his tickling, and laced their fingers together.
"I love that you don't care if Buckley and Brennan are in bed with us." He told her and she laughed.  Justin smiled.  He loved the sound of Aubrey's laugh.  She was always beautiful to him, but when she laughed she was downright irresistible.

"That's a weird thing to love about someone." She told him as she looked down towards the end of the bed at the two boxers who were laying there.  Brennan lifted her head, her short tail thumping the bed as she looked at Aubrey.  "I love those two." She told him.    

"Not everyone has been as...understanding as you are about them being in my life." He told her as he turned her hand in his and began massaging her palm with his thumb.  Aubrey turned back to look at him, her hazel eyes meeting his.  He held her gaze as he brought her hand to his mouth and pressed his lips into her palm.  She moved her hand slightly, placing it against his cheek.  "I just wanted to tell you that."

~~~~~~ 

"You're cute," Aubrey told him with a smile.  She ran her thumb over his bottom lip as she continued looking up at him.  She loved being like this with him.  It made it easier to push aside the fears that had begun nagging at her--wondering when this honeymoon phase they were in was going to wear off and real life was going to intrude on their relationship.  The press had already taken several jabs at her--publicly flaunting the fact that she was below the usual standard of girls Justin had dated in the past-and a small part of her wondered if he was going to wake up one day and realize that fact for himself.    

"Cute enough to tell me a secret?" He asked innocently. 

Aubrey narrowed her eyes in suspicion as she looked up at him.  "A secret?" She asked.  "What kind of a secret?"

"The secret of what you're getting me for my birthday." He continued a mischievous sparkle in his blue eyes.

"I'm not telling you that." She stated with a shake of her head. 

"Damn it!" Justin exclaimed with a scowl and Aubrey laughed at the frustrated look on his handsome face.

"Nice try, super star." She told him.  "But you're going to have to do better than that at buttering me up to get that secret out of me." 

Justin looked at her for a moment, one eye brow slowly rising and Aubrey chuckled, though her stomach began quivering at the sudden look of determination in his blue eyes.  She was in trouble!  She'd issued him a challenge, and one thing she'd learned about Justin in the time they'd been together was that he couldn't resist a challenge.

He turned his head slightly towards her hand that was still pressed against his face, and kissed her palm once again.  Lifting one of his hands he placed it against hers as his mouth moved down to her wrist-his lips caressing her skin.  He leaned over her as he laid her arm out on the mattress and began slowly kissing his way toward her shoulder.  Aubrey closed her eyes and couldn't help the breathy moan that escaped.  Justin chuckled softly. 

"Is this enough butter?" He asked.

Aubrey shook her head, unable to find her voice for a moment.  "No." She finally managed to squeak out.  Justin's low laugh sounded in her ear and she shivered as he moved atop her--one of his legs sliding between her own.  Instinctively hitching one leg over his hip, Aubrey fought to focus her mind on something other than the way Justin was nearly devouring her neck.  If she gave in to the delicious sensations coursing through her at his skillful and purposeful kisses, he was going to win.  She didn't want him to win.  She had thought long and hard on what she was getting him and she wanted to keep his birthday present a surprise. 

"Can I ask you a question?" Aubrey inquired proud of the steady quality of her voice.  She bit her bottom lip as one of Justin's hands moved down her side--his fingers slowly slipping beneath the hem of her shirt. 

"You just did." He replied, his response muffled as his lips continued to travel down her neck and throat. 

Aubrey rolled her eyes at his smart-aleck remark though he wasn't looking at her.  Her back arched slightly in reflex as he lifted her shirt higher and moved his lips down to her stomach.

"It's hard to believe sometimes that you're going to be twenty-nine in two weeks." She told him, breathlessly--her eyes closing. 

He was winning.

"Aubrey Janae!" Justin said, sitting back and looking down at her in mock horror.  "Such dirty words coming from your beautiful mouth." He tsked as he shook his head in reproach.

"Dirty words?" She asked with a confused chuckle.  "What are you talking about?  Twenty-nine?" She guessed and grinned as Justin gasped.  He put his hand to his heart as if she had physically wounded him and closed his eyes as if he were in pain.  She laughed as she put her hands to his bare chest.  Justin narrowed his eyes as he glared down at her.  "Don't worry." She told him.  "You'll always be sexy to me."

Justin lowered himself back down so he was closer to her--his palms resting on the mattress on either side of her head.  "What did you want to ask me before you insulted me?" He asked, his blue eyes staring into hers, and she smiled as she reached a hand up, her fingers running over his short hair.  She wondered briefly what it would have felt like to run her fingers through his hair when he had had his longer curls.  As promised, Rachel had shown her some of the pictures and videos she had from when the guys had been at their peak and that was the thought that had run through Aubrey's head the most.  She suddenly wanted to ask him if he would ever consider growing his hair out again, or if this was all the longer he was going to let it get. 

"Are you going to answer me, or just lay there staring at me all day?" Justin asked, bringing her back to the present.   

"Sorry." She smiled up at him.  "Since you brought them up, I was just going to ask what you usually do with Buckley and Brennan when you go out on tour."

Justin twisted his body as he looked down toward the foot of the bed.  Both boxers lifted their heads, sensing their master's stare.  "It depends on where I'm going." Justin said, rolling off of her as he lay on his side once more--head propped in his hand again.

Aubrey tugged her T-shirt down as she sat up, leaning back against the headboard.  Justin moved closer to her, laying his head in her lap.  Aubrey smiled as she began running her fingers through his hair.  "What are you going to do with them this time?" She asked looking at the dogs, both of which had quickly wiggled and barked their way into her heart.   

"I was actually going to talk to you about that." Justin told her. 

"Me?" Aubrey asked.  "What did you want to talk to me about?"

Justin sat up and looked at her.  "I was going to see if you wanted to move in here-while I was gone-to keep an eye on them." He gestured with his thumb toward the dogs. 

Aubrey stared at him in shock.  "Y-you...you want me to move in with you?" She asked.

He grinned.  "Well, you're going to be moving in here eventually." He told her as he picked up her left hand, twisting the diamond ring on her finger a bit.  "Why not sooner rather than later?" He asked.

"I..." Aubrey paused, a million thoughts running through her head.  "No." She shook her head.

"No?" Justin echoed, his brows furrowing in complete confusion.  "What do you mean, ‘no'?" He asked. 

"I don't want to stay here all by myself." She told him.  "Your house is too big."  Justin relaxed next to her as he let out a sigh of relief. 

"You're not going to be here by yourself." He replied.  "Buckley and Brennan will be here." He reminded her with a grin.

"I don't know..." Aubrey hesitated as she looked around the room.  "Why do you have a house this big anyway?" She asked him.

"Because I can." He replied with a shrug.  Aubrey looked at him, in question.  "What?" He asked.

"Nothing." She shook her head as she moved to get up- trying to convince herself the doubts that had come with his flippant attitude were ridiculous and unfounded. 

"Wait a second." Justin said, leaning across the bed to grab hold of her arm before she could walk away.  Aubrey turned to look down at where his hand lay against her then met his blue gaze.  "You're mad at me." He stated.  "Why?"

"I'm not mad at you." She replied. 

"Yes you are." Justin said as he stood up before her.  "What did I say?"

"I'm not mad." Aubrey assured him.  "I'm just..." she sighed, searching for the words to express her thoughts and feelings.  How in the world were they going to make this work?  She wondered as she looked at him.  He was used to a completely different way of life and way of living than she was comfortable with--a life that most of the time seemed excessive to her.  Was it really necessary for him to have six cars, a dozen motorcycles and live in this huge house all by himself?  She'd always pictured herself living a quiet, unassuming life in a small town somewhere but those plans went right out the window the moment her life had become entwined with that of the one and only Mr. SexyBack and she was still struggling with the change. There was more to it than that, but she couldn't pinpoint why the idea of moving in here was suddenly making her so uncomfortable and she didn't really want to analyze it at the moment. 

"Don't." Justin said, suddenly pulling her from her thoughts.  Aubrey looked at him.  "Don't." He shook his head as he stepped closer to her, his blue eyes holding hers steadily.  "Don't sabotage this." He pled quietly.

"I'm not--"

"Yes you are." He interrupted.  "I can see it in your eyes.  I love you." He stated emphatically.  "And I know you love me and that's all that matters.  This is just a house." He told her, spreading his arms out wide.  "I can sell it and we can get one that's smaller; one that you like.  Whatever you want.  Just please," he put a hand to her face, his thumb caressing her cheek.  "Please stop thinking that this isn't going to work.  That means you've still got some doubts about us." He put his other hand on her face as he leaned down, gently pressing his lips to hers. 

Aubrey sighed as Justin's lips lefts hers and he rested his forehead against hers. She kept her eyes closed as their breath mingled.  She opened her eyes to find him watching her--his clear blue eyes serious and intense. 

"It's going to work." He told her firmly.  Aubrey nodded as she wrapped her arms around his neck and pulled him towards her--begging him to kiss her again.  It was easier to forget about her worries when he kissed her.  As their lips met again Aubrey pushed the lingering doubts from her mind.  He was right.  They loved each other and that was all that mattered.  She just needed to trust him. 

~~~~~~

"Stop!"

Rachel stopped at the harshly spoken Russian command Friday morning.  She watched as an older man wearing what she assumed was a security uniform approach her as she stood beside the fenced off section of town where JC's movie set was.  He began speaking to her in Russian, and Rachel took the security badge JC had given her a few days ago out of her pocket and showed it to him.  "I'm here to see my fiancée." She told him, though she knew he probably didn't understand her.  He looked at the badge then let her walk past the barricade that had been set up to keep the general public out of the filming area.  "Thank you." She smiled at him but he said nothing--just returned to his post manning the barricade. 

Rachel shoved her hands further down into the pockets of the heavy winter coat she was wearing and hunched her shoulders--attempting to cover her ears from the cold air.  They'd been in Moscow now for about a week and a half and she was counting down the days until they returned to Southern California.  Not only was she bored but she missed the sun and warmth of her home state.  She missed being able to wear sandals in the middle of the winter.

"Can I help you, ma'am?" She looked up as a young man--who was probably close to her same age--inquired in heavily accented English.  She grimaced slightly at being called "ma'am."

"I'm looking for JC Chasez." She told him, once more pulling the security badge from her pocket to prove she had the right and authority to be there.  "He's one of the actors--"

"Middle trailer." The young man answered pointing in front of her. 

"Thank you." Rachel smiled as she hurried towards her destination.  As she approached his trailer--the sound of the generators running the heaters around the set humming in the background--Rachel ran her fingers through her hair and knocked on the door.  When he didn't answer right away she tested the door handle.  "Jace?" She called out as she opened the door.  She shivered, once again wondering why she'd been crazy enough to think she could handle the frigid temperatures in this crazy country.

"Rachel?" He asked, his voice coming from the back of the trailer.  "Is that you?"

"Yeah." She answered as she stepped inside, shutting the small door behind her.

"What are you doing here?" He asked, sounding excited and happy to see her. 

"I was bored and I--" Rachel began as she turned around then stopped, her jaw dropping at the sight of him.

~~~~~~

"You, what?"  JC asked with a chuckle at the stunned expression on Rachel's face.  "Are you okay?" She nodded mutely.  "What's the matter with you?"

Hearing her voice and seeing her beautiful face had been a nice surprise.  They'd been working all day on the same scene over and over again, trying to get it perfect and he was tired.  He'd spent years as a kid doing this, but eight hours of filming now--at thirty-two--were a hell of a lot longer than they used to be when he was a teenager.  I'm getting old.  He thought, suddenly questioning the soundness of the decision for the group to go back out on tour.  

"I-I..." Rachel stuttered, bringing him from his thought.  She swallowed hard, her eyes raking over him as if she'd never seen him before.  He looked down at himself but he couldn't figure out what was wrong.  There really wasn't anything unusual about the tan Air Force uniform he was wearing.  He looked at her expectantly, with his eyebrows raised in question.

"I don't..." She shook her head.  "Is that what you're wearing for your part?" She asked, pointing at him.

"It's one of the outfits." He replied as he walked towards her.  "Why?" He asked as he opened the small fridge under the counter in the kitchen area and grabbed a bottle of water.  He turned to look at her.  He began opening the bottle but paused as Rachel began sauntering towards him-a definite glint in her brown eyes.  He watched her closely until she stood right in front of him. 

"I'm not sure I like the idea of you wearing this onscreen." She said as she cocked her head to the side.

"What?" He chuckled.  "Why not?"

"Because, only I should be able to see you looking this damn good." She answered as she put her hands on his chest.

A slow smile spread across his face.  "Hmmm...So, you like me in uniform, huh?"

"No." She shook her head slowly as she leaned towards him.  "I love you in uniform." She whispered in his ear.  "You," she said leaning back and running her hands down his chest and around his waist.  "Should definitely wear this more often." She looked up at him through her lashes and JC felt his heart start to pound.  She knew just how to get his blood pumping.

"If I'd known it would get this kind of rise out of you I would have had you come to the set everyday." He replied as he placed his water bottle on the counter next to them than lifted his arms.  Brushing her long hair over her shoulders and away from her face, he cupped her face.  JC leaned down and pressed his lips against Rachel's softly, careful to hold back and not let it go too far--they were in his trailer, after all and he was waiting for his call back to shooting.  Somebody could walk in on them at any moment, but foreplay was definitely something that was under-utilized in their relationship.  What was the harm of warming her up a bit for when they could really do something later on?. 

He pulled back after a brief moment, chuckling to himself when she followed him then opened her eyes and looked at him in disappointment.  He took a few steps-walking her backwards--until she was pressed back against the small closet door opposite of where they were standing.  Putting his hands on the wall to either side of her head he looked at her for a moment before leaning over and pressing his lips to the corner of her jaw. 

~~~~~~

Rachel whimpered as JC pressed his weight more fully against her and couldn't help it when her head dropped back against the door behind her.  Who'd have known she'd have such a strong reaction to seeing her fiancé dressed up in uniform?  But, hot damn, was he sexy!  She'd walked into the trailer completely unprepared for the pure and unadulterated lust that had shot through her at seeing him in costume.  She had wanted nothing more than to rip the uniform off of him and have her way with him, but she had to admit--as his lips roamed down her neck--she didn't mind that he seemed intent on taking his time in seducing her.  She knew there was a chance that they could be interrupted but there was something exciting about the thought of doing this with him here.   

JC pulled back slightly, his chest rising and falling deeply and Rachel felt an evil smile spread across her face as she put her hands on his chest and pushed him away from her.  JC's brows furrowed in confusion and disappointment but she took his hand and led him towards the small couch against the back wall that she'd seen out of the corner of her eye.  Pulling him in front of her, she put her hands on his chest once more and pushed him to sit down, then sat down herself--straddling his lap.  A lazy grin spread across his handsome face as his hands slowly moved up and over her jean clad thighs and hips.  Rachel put her hands on his face as she placed a series of quick kisses to his lips.  Moving her hands up his slightly roughened cheeks-the light scruff needed for his character's part tickling her palms--she ran her fingers through his hair, tousling his heavily gelled dark locks.

"Wendy's going to kill you." He breathed as he leaned forward, brushing his lips across her jaw line.

"Who's Wendy?" Rachel asked, her eyes narrowing in question as she pulled back slightly and looked at him.

"The lady who spends two hours each morning doing my hair and make-up." He replied, his hands gripping her hips as he pulled her more fully against him.

"I'll fix it." She promised as she wrapped one hand around the back of his neck and drew him forward to kiss him again-surrendering willingly as he took charge of the kiss.  She moaned as he deepened the exchange, their tongues dancing together slowly and seductively.  She loved the way he tasted!  There was nothing she could compare the taste of his kiss to.  All she knew was that she couldn't live without it. 

Rachel was suddenly burning up and pulled away from JC in order to remove the coat she was wearing.  JC groaned as she came back to him.  Her lips quickly finding his again and she couldn't hold back the moan that escaped as his hands slipped beneath her shirt.  She pulled away from him.  Her lungs were screaming for oxygen, but he seemed perfectly content to keep going.  Rachel gripped his shoulders, her head falling back as JC's lips burned a slow trail down her neck and throat-his fingers running over her back and slowly traveling upwards. 

A knock came at the trailer's door suddenly and Rachel jumped in JC's arms.  A voice called out; informing JC he was needed on set and Rachel groaned as he pulled away from her.  A slow smile spread across his face as he brought the fingers of one hand beneath her chin, his thumb caressing her bottom lip before he kissed her softly again. 

"How late are you going to be tonight?" Rachel asked breathlessly.

"I shouldn't be too late." He answered.

"Good." She replied as she put her hands to his face and kissed him firmly then removed herself from his lap and stood up.  JC reached out and swatted her rear as he stood as well and Rachel turned to look at him sharply. 

"I'll call you when I'm leaving." He told her.  "Be ready." He said as he tucked in his shirt and smoothed his hands over his hair. 

"Is that an invitation?" She asked with a grin.

"It's a promise." He replied with a wink and Rachel smiled, her stomach quivering in anticipation.  JC put one arm around her waist and drew her towards him again-his lips pressing against her own warmly--and Rachel sighed in contentment. 

~~~~~~

"What do you mean he's acting weird?" Rachel asked Megan over the phone that evening.  Though it was already five o'clock in Russia, with the time difference and the dateline between them, it was only eight am in Phoenix. 

Rachel bent down to examine the jewelry in the display case in front of her.  She glanced around the store for a salesperson.  When one caught her eye and came over, she pointed at the ring she wanted to look at.

"He's just...weird." Megan sighed. 

"Details, Megs." Rachel chuckled as the saleswoman handed her the silver, flower shaped ring.  Each petal was set in a different color of amber and Rachel smiled.  Megan would love it!  Nodding she handed the ring to the woman who put it in a box for her.  She gestured that she was going to look around a little more and would come back to pay for the ring.

"He comes home late every night and he's usually gone by the time I get up in the morning." Megan replied. 

"Okay..." Rachel shrugged.  "So, he's working a lot.  That's really not that weird."

"No, but it's more than that." Megan continued.  "He's been making a lot of weird phone calls lately and whenever I come into the room he'll hang up quickly or walk outside to keep talking.  He's being so secretive about things.  Whenever I ask him who he's talking to he makes up some answer that I know is a lie or he'll just change the subject." 

"Maybe he's planning a surprise party for your birthday next month." Rachel supplied as she continued to walk through the gift shop browsing. 

"Is he planning a surprise party for my birthday?" Megan asked inquisitively.

"I don't know." Rachel answered honestly.  "If he is he hasn't talked to me about anything."  Megan sighed heavily on the phone.  "What else." Rachel prodded.  "There's got to be more going on to make you this suspicious of him."

"I don't know, I just...what if he's..." Megan trailed off.  "What if he's cheating on me?" She asked quietly.

"There's no way." Rachel replied firmly with a shake of her head, unwilling for even a second to consider the idea. 

"How do you know?" Megan asked.

"I just know." Rachel stated.  "There's no way that he--"

"We haven't had sex in almost a month." Megan confided.

"What?!" Rachel exclaimed.  The other shoppers looked at her in surprise at her out burst.  She quickly ducked behind a row of shelves and lowered her voice.  "Are you serious?" She asked.  "How is that even possible?"

"Not all of us are engaged to sex addicted pop stars, Rachel." Megan replied bitterly.

Rachel laughed.  "He is not an addict." She insisted with a roll of her eyes.

"Uh-huh." Megan replied, sounding unconvinced. "Right."

"Have you talked to him?" Rachel asked, turning the subject back to Jackson, instead of JC.

"No." Megan answered.

"Why not?"

"Because, as I previously mentioned, he's never home!" Megan exclaimed in frustration.  "And when he is, he's always on the phone with someone."

"You need to talk to him." Rachel insisted as she spotted an old antique wooden chest shoved back in one corner of the store.  She walked towards it, her designer's eye already thinking about how and where she could use it.  The old wood was intricately carved and Rachel knew she had to have it.  She didn't know where she was going to put it or what she was going to do with it, but she knew she'd regret it if she didn't get it.  I wonder if they can ship to the States. She wondered as she looked at the price tag and grimaced.  And if I can talk them into lowering the price!

"And what am I supposed to say?" Megan asked, interrupting Rachel's train of thought.  "Are you having an affair?" 

Rachel scolded herself for becoming so distracted while talking to Megan.  She stood and put her hand on her hip, focusing on the conversation she was having with her best friend.  "No." She answered.  "But you need to talk to him.  I'm sure there's a reasonable explanation for everything going on but you'll never know and you'll worry yourself sick over assumptions and speculations unless you talk to him.  Or better yet!" Rachel said, suddenly remembering her earlier encounter with JC.  "Go surprise him at work!" She smiled, proud of herself for coming up with the idea.

"I'm going into the office today." Megan replied. "I can't just go surprise him."

"So, go surprise him with lunch." Rachel told her.  Megan was quiet for a moment.  "What are you thinking?" Rachel asked.

"You don't want to know." Megan replied.

"Yes I do." Rachel insisted.

Megan sighed.  "I'm thinking that this is all reminding me about when my Dad left." She admitted softly. 

Rachel was silent.  She didn't know how to respond to that statement.  Megan's Dad had left her family when she was ten because of an affair he was having.  Rachel had always admired Megan's strength and determination in overcoming what that had done to her emotionally and psychologically but she was suddenly very worried about her best friend. "Megs..." she trailed off. 

"I'm sure you're right, though." Megan interrupted.  "I'm just blowing everything out of proportion.  It's probably nothing, right?"

"Right." Rachel replied, trying to sound confident and reassuring. 

"Right." Megan echoed sullenly. 

"So..." Rachel prodded.  "What are you going to do?"

Megan took a deep breath.  "I'm going to go talk to him over lunch." She replied.

"Good." Rachel smiled.  "I think that's a good idea."

"Of course you do." Megan chuckled wryly.  "You thought of it."

"That's right!" Rachel laughed.  "And my ideas are always good."

"Always?" Megan questioned.  "I seem to remember a certain high school Halloween dance and your ‘good' idea to dye your hair bright red.  Remember how that idea turned out?" Megan laughed.

"So I picked up the green hair dye box by mistake." Rachel shrugged.  "Big deal."

"Your hair was green for a month!" Megan exclaimed.  "Remember?"

"So what?" Rachel asked with a laugh.  That was ten years ago."  The girls both laughed at the shared memory.  "ListenI have to go." Rachel finally said.  "I found this awesome antique chest that I want to buy at this store I'm at and they're about to close."

"Yeah, I've got to feed Scott and finish getting ready for work." Megan replied. 

"Call me later and tell me how lunch went, okay?" Rachel asked.

"Okay." Megan said again. 

"It'll be okay, Megs." Rachel told her.  "I know it."

"Thanks." Megan said.  "I'll call you later."

"Okay." Rachel said then ended the phone call.  She pursed her lips in thought as she looked at the small phone in her hands.  She had half a mind to call Jackson up and give him a sound talking too about the emotional stress he was putting her best friend through but resolved to just stay out of it.  For now.   For better or worse Megan and Jackson were married and they needed to work out their problems together.  She'd done what she could a few years ago to get them to stay together...now it was up to them to pull together and make it through this rough patch. 

Putting her phone in her purse Rachel walked up to the counter.  Through the limited knowledge of English that the saleswoman had and a lot of hand gestures, Rachel told the woman she wanted to buy the chest along with the ring she had picked out earlier.  She had her own problems to worry about right now.  She pulled out her credit card and handed it over to the woman.  Like explaining to JC why I just bought a $2000 wooden box!  She blew out a breath as she signed the receipt and asked the woman if they offered shipping services.  She smiled when the lady nodded.  What he doesn't know won't hurt him. She reasoned and began filling out the necessary shipping documents. 

~~~~~~

"Aren't you afraid of your wife finding out?" A woman's quiet voice came through the slightly opened office door.

"No." The man inside answered firmly. "She has no idea what's going on."

"What are you going to do if she finds out about all of this?" The woman asked.

"Nothing." He answered firmly.  "Because she's not going to find out until I'm ready to tell her."

~~~~~~

Megan stared blankly ahead of herself as she leaned back against the wall beside the partially opened door to Jackson's office.  The whispered conversation she'd just overheard between her husband and an a woman who's voice she didn't recognize, echoed through her head and she found herself praying she was in the middle of some horrible dream. 

Wake up!  She told herself, but it did no good. She put a hand to her chest as she suddenly found it hard to breathe.  As she stood there, concentrating on breathing evenly, she was suddenly reminded of a conversation she had inadvertently overheard between Jackson and his mother years ago.   When they had been first been dating, Jackson had taken her to his family's condo in Aspen, Colorado for the weekend to teach her to ski.  Unbeknownst to them, his parents and two younger siblings had also gone up there for the weekend and through a rather embarrassing moment where they had been caught making out, Megan had been quickly introduced to his family.  That night she had overheard Jackson and his mother talking.

"Does she know everything, Jackson?" Megan heard Karen ask as she approached the kitchen.

"No." Came Jackson's quiet response.

"You need to tell her, sweetheart."

"I know." He answered with a hefty sigh.

Megan peeked around the corner and saw Jackson lean back against the counter as he put his hands into his hair.  "I know." He looked up at his mother.  "I just don't know how to tell her.  I should have told her at the beginning, but now..."

Karen came to stand in front of him and put her hands on his shoulders.  Megan quickly ducked back around the corner and leaned back against the wall, her ears still tuned to the conversation taking place between mother and son.  "That girl loves you.  And it's obvious you're pretty taken with her yourself.  You need to tell her." Karen stated again.

Tell me what? Megan thought thoroughly confused.  What does he need to tell me?

"I'm afraid." Jackson said.  "I-I..." He cleared his throat then continued.  "I never thought I would have to explain this to her.  I don't know what she'll do when she finds out."

A door opening further down the hall snapped her out of her thoughts and she straightened and looked at his office door--her heart and head battling whether she should march in there and confront him.  She took a step forward, then stopped--fear and uncertainty stopping her.  Did she really want to come face to face with her husband's mistress?  Wouldn't it be easier if she didn't have a face to but with the voice?  Besides, she didn't know what to she would say or do once she was in there and the secret was out, so she left--silently cursing Rachel and her ‘good idea' to come surprise her Jackson at work for lunch.  

Megan slid into her car and sat, staring out the windshield--too stunned and in shock to feel any sort of emotion.  She leaned forward--resting her forehead against the steering wheel as another painful memory assaulted her.

"You're...MARRIED?!?" Megan exclaimed as she looked at him in shock.  Out of all the scenarios she'd thought up when she'd heard Jackson and his mother talking a few weeks ago, Jackson being married was not what she had been prepared to hear. 

"It's not what you think." He said as he placed a hand on her face.

Megan pushed his hand away and stepped out of his arms.  She turned and looked at him unable to speak; unable to react.  In her mind she knew how she should react to this revelation.  She should be yelling, calling him names and throwing him but she just stood there-stunned into silence. 

"Megan?" Jackson took a step towards her.

"Why?" She asked quietly as a single, silent tear slipped down her cheek. "Why didn't you tell me?" She asked.

"I wanted to." He said.  "So many times.  But it...it never came up."

Megan bit her bottom lip to keep it from trembling as she nodded slowly then walked towards the door, pulling it open.  "You need to leave." She said, the calmness in her voice belying the emotions raging through her.

"Megan." He walked towards her.  "Listen to me.  There's more to this than--" 

"No." She shook her head and stood her ground, despite the tears falling from her eyes.  "Leave.  Now."

He stepped through the door but turned to look back at her.  "I love y--" 

Megan shut the door in his face before he could finish his statement.  She slid down the door, drew her knees up to her chest and sat, staring straight ahead as her body slowly went numb.

Although Jackson had been right-it wasn't what she thought-it had still hurt and the revelation that the man she was in love with was married to someone else had driven a wedge between them for a while.  When Rachel had finally tricked her into seeing Jackson again a month later and he finally got the chance to explain that his wife had disappeared six months after their marriage, that he had reported her as a missing person, and that he had to wait the necessary timeframe to have her declared officially dead, Megan realized it wasn't as bad as she had assumed. 

"It's nothing." She said aloud as she gripped the steering wheel tightly.  "It's nothing.  I'm just overreacting."  He could have been talking about anything!  She reminded herself.  Except for that nagging voice in the back of her mind she could almost believe it. 

Almost. 

She felt her shoulders slump as she started her car and left the parking lot, her heart unwilling to accept what her mind was telling her.  Too many little things were beginning to add up and she didn't like the solution she was coming up with. 

~~~~~~

Megan let out a tired sigh as she opened the front door and stepped into the house that evening.  Closing the door behind her, she kicked off her shoes and ran her fingers through her hair.  After overhearing the incriminating conversation at Jackson's office, her day had quickly gone from bad to worse with nothing going right.  Not only was she dealing with suspicions of her husband cheating on her and all of the emotions that went along with that, but the publisher and author she was currently working on hadn't liked any of her ideas for the cover of their book and she was now forced to redo the entire thing in less than two weeks!  She didn't know how she was going to do it.  It had taken her nearly a month to get the original design to where she was happy with it, and now they wanted something completely different in half the time in order to be ready to print on time.  She was going to have to work quickly and she hated doing that.  She put her heart and soul into every cover she designed and having to do sub-par work went against who she was and the reputation she had built for herself.

She was pulled from her thoughts as she heard someone rattling dishes around in the kitchen.  Her brows furrowed in confusion.  "Mom?" She called out as she walked towards the noise. 

Since having Scott last year, Megan had been able to stay on at the publishing company she worked for part-time.  Her job as a graphic designer really only required a computer and the necessary designing software so she was able to do most of the work from home, but she still went into the office a couple days a month to meet with her clients.  Her mom had volunteered to watch Scott on those days and would drop him off after Megan got home.  Apparently her mother had decided to come by a little early today and was now doing something in the kitchen. 

"How was--" Megan stopped as she walked into the room.  "Jackson?" She asked, surprised to see her husband standing at the stove.

"Hi." He said a hesitant smile on his face as he turned to look at her.  Brushing his hands on the dishtowel tucked into the front of his pant that was serving as a makeshift apron.

"What..." Megan looked at him, speechless.  "What are you doing?" She finally asked as she set her purse down on the counter and looked at him in question.

"I'm cooking." He answered simply.  "I hope you're hungry." He smiled.   

"I-I don't..." Megan paused.  "What are you doing home so early?" She asked as she looked at her watch, her mind starting to spin with all of the reasons why he would be home so early.  And cooking dinner!

He shrugged.  "Do I need a reason to be home?" He asked.

"No." She replied with a shake of her head.  "I just...I'm...I'm surprised.  That's all." She told him.

"That was my plan." He stated with a smile.  She watched him with wide eyes for a moment, her heart beating painfully in her chest.  She turned slightly, her eyes landing on a vase of pink roses--her favorite flower--sitting on the kitchen table.  "She's not going to find out until I'm ready to tell her."

A snippet from his conversation she had heard earlier suddenly popped into her mind and her knees almost buckled.  She gripped the countertop tightly--her knuckles turning white--as the meaning behind those flowers and his bizarre behavior suddenly made itself clear.  He's ready to tell me.  She thought in distress as she continued to stare at the flowers.  He's ready to tell me he's leaving.  She didn't even know she was crying until he said something.

"Megan?" Jackson asked looking at her in question, his brows furrowed in concern.  "Are...are you okay?" He asked hesitantly.

"I'm fine." Megan insisted as she straightened and brushed away her tears.  "I just..." She turned to look at him again, her heart constricting painfully in her chest at the thought of losing him to someone else.  "It's been a long day." She finally said, her bottom lip trembling.  Jackson took a step towards her but Megan turned.  "I'm going to go change." She said, and quickly left the room before he could stop her. 

Once in the bedroom she sat down on the bed a single sob escaping before she could keep it in.  As if it were all the permission she needed, that sob opened up the floodgates.  Falling over on her side Megan grabbed her pillow and hugged it tightly to her chest.  Curling up tightly, her heart broke with every tear that fell. 

What had she done to make him stop loving her?  What had she done to push him into the arms of another woman?  When had she stopped being good enough for him?  Did the years they'd been together mean nothing to him?  And what about Scott?  What was going to happen now?  Was she destined to live her life the way her mother had?  Raising her child alone?

"Megan?"  Jackson questioned as he knocked on the door, interrupting her thoughts.  "Dinner's..." he trailed off as he stepped into the room.  She opened her eyes as she looked up at him.  "Why are you crying?" He asked his dark brows furrowed as he looked at her in concern.  "What's going on?"

"What did I do wrong?" She asked through her tears as she sat up and looked at him.  "I don't understand." She said, swinging her legs over the side of the bed.

"W-wha..." Jackson looked at her in bewilderment.  "I, uh...what do you mean?" He finally asked.

"If you'll tell me, I'll fix it."  She continued.  "I know I've been kind of moody lately and the house hasn't been as clean as it used to be, but I'm trying." She told him.  "It's just harder than I thought it was going to be working and having Scott.  I just...I can't keep up with everything and I'm sorry."  She put her face in her hands.

"Megan." Jackson said, stepping towards her.  "Sweetheart, look at me."  Kneeling down in front of her, he took her hands in his and pulled them away from her face.  "What is going on?" He asked his blue eyes full of questions as he set her hands in her lap and placed his hands on her face--his thumbs brushing away her tears.

"I can do better." She told him, suddenly desperate to keep him from walking away.  She would do anything as long as he promised to stay.  She could change.  She could do whatever he wanted her to do.  "I can." She nodded.  "Just give me a chance..." She trailed off as her emotions took over once again.  She bent her head and closed her eyes, but Jackson lifted her chin with one hand.

"Look at me." He pled quietly.  Megan slowly opened her eyes.  "Please stop crying." He begged.  "I hate it when you cry.  The house is fine!" He insisted and Megan sniffed as she tried to control her tears.  "And as for you being moody, I haven't noticed anything.  Maybe that's because I haven't been home as much lately as I should have been, and for that I'm sorry, but Megan..." He trailed off as he looked at her.  "You're kind of scaring me here.  I don't know what's going on.  Where is this all coming from?"

"I thought..." She hesitated.  "You're never home." She told him.  "You don't call me.  You hardly touch me anymore.  I thought...I thought..." She trailed off, unable to actually say the words.  Jackson let out a heavy sigh and hung his head.  He dropped his hands from her face as he set them on the bed on either side of her.  Megan watched him, her bottom lip trembling.

"I'm sorry." He said quietly.  He slowly raised his head--his blue eyes meeting hers.  "If I've given you the idea that I..." He shook his head as he gently lifted one hand to her face--his thumb caressing her cheek.  "I am so sorry." He told her.  "I love you."

~~~~~~ 

Megan let out another sob as she threw her arms around him-her face pressed against his neck.  Jackson knelt up, wrapping his arms around her waist as he held her tightly.  Megan continued to cry on his shoulder as he tried to calm her down.  He'd never seen her this worked up before and like he'd told her--he was a little scared.  What in the world was going on?  If he'd known cooking dinner for her tonight was going to set off this reaction he never would have done it.  But there was more than just dinner causing her to cry like this.  Running his hand over her hair Jackson bent his head, his lips brushing against her temple. 

"I'm sorry." He whispered.  "I'm sorry."  Finally, her tears began to quiet but she continued to cling to him almost desperately.  "I just wanted to surprise you." He told her.  "I didn't know..."

Megan pulled back, looking at him--her blue-green eyes cautious.  Jackson put his hands to her face--brushing her hair back.  Her eyes were red and her cheeks were tear stained, but she was still beautiful to him.  How he'd been able to survive without touching and being close to her this past month, he suddenly didn't know and he was kicking himself for being such an idiot. 

"I know I haven't been around a lot lately, and I'm sorry." He said as his thumbs caressed her cheeks, brushing away the remaining moisture on her skin.  "I called your mom this afternoon and asked her if she could watch Scott tonight because I wanted to surprise you.  I didn't mean to make you cry."

Megan remained quiet so he continued.  "I've got something to tell you." He told her.  "But I was waiting for the right time."  Megan's eyes followed him as he stood.  "I'll be right back." He said then turned and left the room. 

~~~~~~

Megan sniffed and lifted her hands to wipe her face as Jackson disappeared down the hall.  She had been able to release a lot of her stress and anxiety through her tears--and the feeling of Jackson's arms around her had been what she'd been needing for a long time now--but she was anxious about what his "surprise" was.  He could still be planning to deal her out some bad news.  What exactly had he been "waiting for the right time" to tell her?  She stood and walked into the bathroom, knowing that she probably looked a sight. 

Flipping on the light she grimaced as she saw her reflection in the mirror.  Red eyes, tear stained cheeks and a stuffed nose--not exactly the most flattering.  She turned on the faucet and splashed some cold water on her face.

"Megan?" She heard Jackson call.  "Where'd you go?"

"I'm here." She said, walking back into the bedroom.  She gathered her hair in her hands and pulled it back behind her shoulders as he held a handful of documents out to her.  She hesitated a second, then took the papers from him.  "What's this?" She asked, looking at him.

"Look at it." He told her. 

Megan looked at him for a moment longer than dropped her gaze to the papers in her hands.  Her brows furrowed as she glanced through everything then her eyes flew back up to his when she realized what she was holding.

"Surprise." He told her with a hesitant smile. 

"Hawaii?" She asked, dumbfounded.  "We're...we're going to Hawaii?" She looked back at the plane tickets and hotel reservations he had printed out.  "Why?"

"Because we need some time alone." He told her.  "Away from everything.  And because you're birthday is coming up and I wanted to take you somewhere you've always wanted to go."

Megan felt tears forming again.  "What about Scott?" She asked her voice shaky as she tried to contain her emotions.  Anymore surprises today and she would probably pass out.  She didn't know how much more she could handle.

"Your mom is going to watch him while we're gone." He told her.

"For ten days?" She asked, finally looking back up at him.  Jackson nodded. 

"It was actually her idea." He told her.  "I mentioned to her at Christmas that I wanted to surprise you with something special for your birthday and she suggested that I take you somewhere and volunteered to watch Scott so we could go alone."

"What about work?" She asked.

"That's why I've been gone so much lately." He told her as he took a step towards her.  "I've been putting in some overtime so I could take the time off."

Megan was starting to feel ridiculous for jumping to all the crazy conclusions she'd been jumping to, but there were still a few questions nagging her.

"I know I haven't been the best husband and father lately." He told her as if he could read her mind and knew what she wanted to ask.  "I've let work get in the way of what I should be doing and I've been taking a lot of things for granted--you especially."  He took another step towards her, the space between them all but gone.  Megan looked up, searching his dark blue eyes.  Jackson reached out and put a hand to her face.  "Will you go to Hawaii with me?" He asked his expression hopeful. 

She nodded and he let out a sigh of relief.  He tilted her head slightly as he pressed his lips to hers.  The papers in her hands dropped to the floor and Megan wrapped her arms around her husband's neck.  What started as a simple kiss soon turned into a heated and driven exchange as they were both suddenly reminded of just how long it had been since they'd last shared anything more than a simple kiss.  Jackson gathered her up in his arms and turned-carrying her to the bed--and Megan pushed the lingering doubts from her mind. 

He still loved her.  He wasn't leaving.