Chapter forty two
 

July 6th 2002

"And here straight from Orlando, Florida is Nsync." Sarah Jessica parker introduced the guys.

     Juliana was third in line to walk out on the runway. This segment was for the gowns. All her gowns were of course by Dolce & Gabana. She had three dresses to go through and five minutes to do so. The music started and the first girl walked out. Five seconds. The next girl. Five seconds. Juliana walked out in a black satin dress that complimented her curves. Justin began.

There's a thousand words that I could say
To make you come home (yeah yeah)

By this time she was standing in front of the guys onstage. All the models were instructed to do so. Juliana tried to do it without any eye contact. Too late. She looked at him.

Seems so long ago you walked away

     Juliana turned and walked down the long runway as Justin continued.

Left me alone

     Juliana concentrated on her walking but the words were hitting her like bricks.

And I remember what you said to me
You were acting so strange (mmm)
And maybe I was too blind to see
That you needed a change

     Justin looked at her while she walked back up the runway towards him again. He changed the lyrics a it as if he was talking directly to her.

 It was something I said
That made you turn away?
That made you walk out and leave me cold

     She made it up to were the guys sat on the stage steps. His eyes never leaving her.

If I could just find a way
To make it so that you were right here
Right now..

     She walked backstage. Hands grabbed at her. Make up was taken off and reapplied. A new dress to the place of the black one.

I've been sitting here
Can't get you off my mind (Can't get you off my mind)
I'll try my best to be a man and be strong
I drive myself insane
Wishing I could touch your face (touch your face)
But the truth remains
You're gone...
You're gone...
Juls you're gone
Juls you're gone, baby girl
You're gone..
You're gone..
You're..

     Juliana walked out again. Now wearing a blue dress that had a train. She walked towards the guys again as the dress glided behind her.

Now I don't wanna make excuses baby
Won't change the fact that you're gone (no no)

     She tried avoiding his gaze but couldn't. her eyes landed upon his.

But if there's something that I could do
Won't you please let me know

     Justin pointed up to her pleading. For the first time in a long time Juliana felt her eyes tear up. She turned and walked back up the runway.

The time is passing so slowly now
Guess that's my life without you  (guess that's my life without you)
And maybe I could change my everyday (yeah)
But baby I don't want to
So I'll just hang around
And find some things to do
To take my mind off missing you

     Juliana walked backstage. Small tears escaped her eyes as the make up artist put her eye liner on.

And I know in my heart
You can't say that you don't love me too
Please say you do
Yeeeeeaah.....
 

I've been sitting here (sitting here)
Can't get you off my mind (get you off my mind)
I'll try my best to be a man and be strong (my best to be a man and be strong)
I drive myself insane
Wishing I could touch your face (Wishing I could touch your face)
But the truth remains (truth remains)
You're gone...
You're gone...

You're gone...
You're gone...
You're gone…

     Juliana walked out with the most beautiful dress Justin had ever seen. She looked like a princess as she walked towards them. Justin got up.

What will I do if I can't be with you?
Tell me where will I turn to, baby who will I be?

     He walked slowly behind her as she made her way down the runway.

Now that we are apart, am I still in your heart?
Baby why don't you see

     He stopped in front of her as she walked back up the runway towards him.
 

That I need you here with me
OOHHHHHHHH

     He fell to his knees in front of her as tears came freely down his face.
 

I've been sitting here (sitting here)
Can't get you off my mind (Can't get you off my mind)
I'll try my best to be a man and be strong  (my best to be a man)
I drive myself insane
Wishing I could touch your face
But the truth remains (the truth remains)
You're Gone..

I've been sitting here (sitting here)
Can't get you off my mind (Can't get you off my mind)
I'll try my best to be a man and be strong  (my best to be a man)
I drive myself insane
Wishing I could touch your face (touch your face)
But the truth remains  (Baby the truth is)
You're gone...
You're gone...
Juls you're gone
Juls you're gone, baby girl
You're gone..
You're gone..
You're..

     Juliana was now in full blown tears. She looked at his crying eyes one last time before walking away from him.

But the truth remains
You're....

     They guys finished. They all looked at their friend at he end of the runway. Justin was on his knees and his head held low. They felt so bad for him. Justin being sprawled out on the floor during this song wasn't anything new. Justin always went all out performing this song at their shows. This time it was different. It wasn't a show. It was real. Even if the audience thought other wise.
 

************************************

July 18th 2002

"Hello Ladies"

"Hi Juls. It's good to hear your voice."

"Same here Dani. How are you?"

"I'm good. Miss your smart comments though." Juliana laughed. She had been talking to Bobbie on the phone when Danielle had shown up at Jc's house. Juliana was now on the speaker phone talking to both ladies.

"When are you coming home, Juls?"

"Bobbie, don't start. I am home."

"Ohh give me a break. Paris isn't were your heart is and you know it."

"Well sometimes following your heart isn't the way to go."

"No, it's the only way to go Juliana."

"So your heart is over here?" Danielle asked.

"What do you mean?"

"You said following your heart isn't always the way to go. Which to me means your heart is here but your stubborn little ass won't come with it?"

"What? You know you don't make any sense right Dani?"

"Admit it, Juls." Bobbie said.

"Admit what?"

"That you love him."

"You guys know the answer to that."

"Say it Juliana." Danielle egged on.

"Why? He's not there is he?"

"No!!" both girls said. Loudly. Next to the phone sat Justin with a basketball on his lap. When Danielle came into the house Chris and Justin followed. Bobbie asked them to be quiet and motioned Justin to sit.

"Ohh alright! Don't yell."

"Say it Juls." Bobbie said once again. "It will make you feel better.

"Or worse. You guys know I love him. I probably always will. I never stopped really. But.."

"But what?" Danielle questioned.

"I can't forgive him. I just can't."

"Why not Juls? He loves you. He just made a moronic mistake. It happens."

"Justin, I know you are there. Probably with a basketball on your lap." she said with a giggle. Justin froze when she talked directly to him. "I can't go back now."

     Justin looked up at his friends. They all got the hint and left the room. Justin picked up the cordless.

"J?" he said into the phone. "Please, don't shut me out."

"Justin don't do this to yourself. Forget about me. Please?"

"Don't say that. I can't just forget about you J."

"Justin please don't call me that." Juliana said almost crying. She couldn't understand why it was so hard for her to forgive him. They were just words. Words that cut right through her heart. Like the piece of glass had gone through her hand.

"Juliana come home. Please?"

"I'm sorry I can't Justin. Do you know how hard it was for me to see you? I can't put myself through that again."

"I need you, Juls. I made a bad move. Let me make it up to you. I need to make it up to you."

"I need time, Justin."

"Alright. Done." he stayed quiet for a couple of seconds. "Was that long enough?"

     Juliana giggled a little. "I have to go Justin."

"Will you call back?"

"Soon." she simply replied.

"I love you J."

"Goodbye Justin."

***********************************

     An hour later Justin opened up one of his garage doors. The brand new red Mercedes was parked inside. It had accumulated dust over the past 6 months. Justin got in and turned the car on. He backed it out of the garage and headed down the driveway and out the gate.

     He turned the cd player on and found that the cd he made for her was still in the slot. He pressed play. As the song started to play he reminisced on the moments he had spent with her.

The first time they argued:

 "Well say whatever you are going to say, now. I'm tired and I want to sleep." Justin said closing his eyes.

"You are a real jerk, you know that? You have been an ass to me for far too long. What have I done to the precious Justin Timberlake? Who the hell do you think you are? One thing is not liking me but damn I thought they taught manners in the Timberlake Institude of Jerks."

"Very Cute. But you know what? I don't have to explain myself to you and...." he was interrupted.

"I'm not done, I've heard quite enough rude things from you.. So it's my turn. Everyone keeps telling me `ohh give him a chance'. Well bullshit Mr. Timberlake! You need to get over the fact that I work on this tour whether you like it or not. So deal wit it!"

"What the hell are you talking about? The only reason you are still on this damn tour is because I HAVENT SAID YOU COULDN"T Ms. Moore!" Justin yelled now standing inches from her.

"You know what? The hell with you. You know I thought you would be different than this child trapped in a body of a man. You are pathetic, you are miserable, and your own girlfriend can't stand being around you." Juliana was now yelling at him less than an inch away from his face.

"You don't know me. So don't go running at the mouth, not that its any of you're business but I no longer have a girlfriend. So when you decide to blow up on someone make sure you have the details down. I don't need to explain myself to you. You don't know me and that's that." Justin looked into her eyes. He didn't know much about her but he could tell she was mad.

"And whose fault is that? I wonder!! Go to hell Justin!" She smiled merely inches from his lips and walked to the door. "Sleep tight" was the only thing that could be heard before the door slammed behind her.

The first time he kissed her:

"Why are you being like this? You are scaring me here. What do you want?"

"What makes you think I want something? I mean I do want to talk to you but nothing more. I promise."

"See, that's just creepy." she was stopped in the middle of her sentence when she felt his lips against hers. She closed her eyes and was lost in his kiss. He gently put his arm around her waist and pulled her closer to him. He deepened his kiss when he noticed her relax in his arms. She was kissing him back and that was a good thing. No, what are you doing Justin?  He slowly removed her hands from his neck where she was caressing him just seconds before.

"Oh god I'm sorry Juliana. I didn't mean to...." he was babbling.

"I, I'm..." Juliana was at a lost of words.

"I mean I do mean it but damn I know you have a boyfriend and...."

"Boyfriend?" Juliana was now extremely confused not to mention light headed from the kiss. Damn what that boy could do with those lips was beyond her.

"Yeah, look I'm sorry for doing that without warning you. I will talk to you tomorrow. There is something for you in there." Justin walked away from her towards his room. Which she noticed was on the same floor.

"But, I.."

"Goodnight Ms. Moore" Justin said shyly and continued walking. He should have been happy about what had just happened. She felt like heaven against his lips, but he couldn't help but feel awful about what he just did. Justin was big on being faithful and he had just been a hypocrite. He had just kissed a girl who he knew had a boyfriend. That wasn't cool. But a kiss like that somehow made it seem so right.

The day they fought over a cookie:

"Yeah well its not nice for people to sneak up on someone like this." Juliana said turning to face him. "I'll leave you two alone"

     Justin sensed that attitude back in her tone. "Wait, aren't you getting anything?" he put his dollar bill in and pressed F4.

     My cookies. He's going to eat my cookies. Now I lost my cookies to him too? "Those are mine!" she managed to say.

"Yours? I don't think so! I just paid for them." Justin said looking at her.

"I was going to get those and then you come in here and take what you want just like that."

"What are you talking about? I put MY money in and now I have MY cookies. If you wanted them why didn't you get them?"

"I didn't have enough change okay? Mr. Timberlake. So hand them over."

"Yeah like I'm really going to give you MY cookies. Did you like your room?" Justin blurted out without thinking. He didn't want to get into this conversation right now with her. She was mad, and not that she wasn't every time he was around. But she was mad over some cookies that she seemed to be obsessed about.

"Come on don't change the subject. I'll give you five dollars for them. Don't make me beg, Justin." Juliana said waving her five-dollar bill.
 

The day all their friends had walked in his house while they made out:

"Excuse me? Last time I checked they are about six bedrooms in this house."

     Juliana and Justin shot up from the sofa like two teenagers that had been caught by a parent. Only it wasn't a parent at all. Instead a grinning Chris stood at the foyer looking into the living room.

"What the hell are you doing here Chris? And how did you get in? Don't you knock?" Justin said taking his t-shirt off and handing it to Juls who stood there exposing a little too much to Chris.

"Hold up J. Too many questions. I still have the key, buddy." Chris said looking around the other side of the sofa. Juliana was unbearably blushing at this point. She felt like killing Chris and most of all she wanted to go home and cry from embarrassment.

"What's going on?" they heard another voice.

"Oh this is just GREAT!" Justin threw his arms in the air and threw himself head down on the sofa.

"Oh god!" Juliana got under the blanket and hid from everyone when they all came in. Dani walked in behind Chris then Lance came in with a girl who was unknown to Juliana. Joey walked in with his brother. Jc and Bobbie were the last to come in and Jc busted into laughter when he realized what was going down. Bobbie joined him in his laughter soon after. Soon the whole group was laughing hysterically.

"Will you guys just LEAVE? I'm begging." Justin mumbled from under the blankets where he had joined Juliana.

"Are you kidding this is better than pay- per -view" Joey said laughing and sitting down on the recliner.
 
 

     Justin smiled as he remembered every situation like it was yesterday. He pulled out of the car wash. The car was now back to its original state. He felt awkward driving the car but the trip to the carwash managed to heal  him a bit. He wondered when she would call again. Why wait? He asked himself. Justin made a u-turn and headed back to Jc's house.

"Bobbie!!" he yelled once inside the door. Bobbie came running downstairs.

"What? What happened? Is everything alright?" she asked out of breath.

"Everything is fine. Geez." Justin said with a laugh.

"Damnit, don't come in here yelling like that." she punched him in the stomach playfully.

"I need her…"

"Her number? Yeah I was wondering when you were going to ask for it. You left in a hurry earlier." Bobbie looked out the window and saw the once abandoned Mercedes in her driveway. "Joy ride?" she asked raising her eyebrows.

"Yeah I guess you can say that. So do you have it?"

"Yeah, but don't call her now. She has a photo shoot."

"Now? It's already four."

"And it's six a.m. over there moron." she said smacking him upside the head.

"You know you need to stop this hitting shit. Should I tell Jc to bring out the whips?" Justin said staring at her. Bobbie just laughed.

"Well I'm happy to see this side of you again. Here." she handed him the piece of paper.

"Thank you." he put the piece of paper in his pocket and gave her a wet smacking kiss on her forehead. "for everything."

"You put your slimy lips on me again. I swear I'll come after you with the whips. But to hurt you." Justin laughed and walked out the door.

**********************************************

"Can I speak to John please?" Justin asked the lady on the phone.

"Yeah sure. May I ask who's calling?"

"This is Justin Timberlake."

"One moment."

"Hello?"

"Hey John. It's Justin."

"Well, you sound better than you sounded last time I spoke to you."

"Thanks." Justin said cheerfully. "I'm just calling to let you know that she's back home now."

"In Orlando?"

"No, she's in Paris again."

"So where was she?"

     Justin sat and explained everything to John.
 

"So you aren't upset?"

"Why would I be upset?" Justin asked.

"Well  she isn't in Orlando with you. Why are you so happy?"

"I'm not completely happy but I feel better about us."

"I'm glad. Take care of her, Justin. She deserves the world and more."

"I know that man. I'll be seeing you."

"Sure thing. Later."

"Later." Justin didn't know why he called John. He still didn't completely like the man. But he helped him out. He was her friend and if he wanted to make things right with her again. He had to start somewhere. He made one more phone call and headed for his room.