He knew he needed to tell his girlfriend, and he knew he had to do it soon. Maybe he could use this as a practise before he told his family next week?

He had no idea how she would react, but he did expect to be single by the end of the night.

She knew something was up when he called her and asked her to come over, she could hear it in his voice, but she knew better than to push him, so she just smiled her brightest smile upon arrival.

He looked at her with a painful expression, guiding her over to the couch.

-“Are you ok?” she asked, expecting him to say he was before they let the subject go, but for the first time he answered differently.

-“No, Jess, I’m actually not” he pulled his hand through his hair and sighed.

She just sat quiet staring at him, thinking he was about to break up with her. She couldn’t say it was completely unexpected, she knew he never was as into this as her.

-“What, Justin?” she asked a bit weary.

-“I’m… God, I don’t know how to say this… Jess, I never intended to hurt you, I… It’s just… It’s a difficult situation… I just don’t know how to tell you…” he was rambling.

She wasn’t gonna make it easier for him; she wanted him to say it himself.

-“What, Justin?” she repeated.

-“Something has happened…Or did happen a while ago… But I didn’t know, and now I do, and it’s something I just can’t run away from…”

How could it be so hard for him to say what was on his mind? He who had always been a magician with words was now reduced to a stuttering idiot! He suddenly realised this was the first serious conversation he had ever had with her, he wasn’t used to talk to her like this.

He knew he had to just jump into it, so he took a deep breath.

-“You know Jordan Callister? That she’s pregnant?” he asked, the lump that had constantly been in his chest since he found out just got bigger and bigger.

Jess nodded.

-“Yeah, it’s kinda…my child…”

There, he said it.

He looked at her expectantly, awaiting her reaction. It seemed like it took several seconds before it sunk in.

-“I don’t understand…” she just said, and he sighed again. “Kinda your child?”

Ok, he could see that was a stupid thing to say.

-“Not kinda, it is.” He confirmed

-“When..how..”

-“I lied about the Oscars, I did spend the night with her, and this was the result”

He bit his lip and continued to study her face. She just looked utterly confused.

-“Is that what she claims?”

-“We took a paternity test, got the result a couple of days ago.”

-“Huh…”she just said, staring at the table, lost in thoughts.

-“What are you thinking?” he asked quietly.

-“I don’t know, Justin. I don’t know, this is just…”

-“Like I said, I never set out to hurt you, but this is my situation right now. And now you’re welcome to throw a glass in my face or call me bad words or whatever, but you deserved to know.”

-“What are you gonna do? Is she asking you for child support or something?”

He put his hands over his face, trying to hide his annoyance with her stupidity.

-“It’s not about that. She doesn’t need my money, she’s got more than I’ll ever make. This is about me, and what I want. It’s my child, I’m his father…”

She nodded again.

-“Ok, so what…are you gonna raise this baby together?”

-“Not like together, but…yeah, kinda. I’m gonna be a big part, yeah.”

-“Oh”

Usually this is what he liked about her, her ability to not make a fuss about anything, her silly remarks, her forgiveness for whatever he did to her, but now he wanted her to have a bit more depth.

She didn’t have anything to say, and he felt he didn’t really have anything to add to this conversation.

-“So, is this it between us, then?” she finally asked

-“That’s totally up to you. I understand if you never wanne see me again”

-“It’s not…I don’t…”

-“Just go home, think about it, and then we can talk later” he said, getting up, ushering her out the door.

She grabbed his hand for a second before she walked out. He watched her from the window, saw her getting her phone up from her hand bag. He didn’t need to be a psychic to know that she was calling her manager for advice. 

He sat down in the couch again.

One down, his whole family to go.    

 Jordan felt she had done good; she had opened up to him, leaving the ball in his court, not arguing, giving him choices, making decisions, staying completely calm, acting nice…

She never thought she would be able to stay so calm during this whole conversation, and it took a lot of strength. Maybe it was the mother instinct taking over?

This was unlike her, and the strangest thing was that it was genuine. She did actually feel his pain; she did care about what he wanted. He was after all her baby’s father, and she cared about her little baby.

She did actually.

She smiled to herself as she admitted it, stroking her belly again. Rumours had it that the hormones made pregnant women crazy, but for her it was the other way around; the last couple of days, ever since the result came in, she had been calmer than ever. Maybe that was her version of crazy?  

She went to the closet and pulled out all the baby stuff Monica had brought her. She lined it out all over the table, looking at it. “What to expect when expecting” read the title of one of the books. Hmm, that must be for her, not the baby. She skimmed through the index, opening up a few chapters and read a few lines.

She put it away, determined to read the whole thing one day, but not right now. Now she just wanted to enjoy how she was feeling without reading about how she was supposed to feel.

Maybe she could read it with Justin? Maybe…Maybe it would be nice to have a father for this child, someone to share it with, someone to love the child as much as she now was certain she would?

Maybe Justin was that guy? Or maybe she just put him on a pedestal because he had said he wanted to be involved. Maybe things would change with time, he would change his mind, and she was back to mother the baby alone. Maybe he would disappoint her as well, just like all other men she had ever known…    

She had only spoken to Justin once after he came to visit, and only because they needed to schedule a meeting with Ken Sunshine. She was off to promote the movie all over the country again, and Justin mentioned that he was going to Tennessee to tell his family.

She was starting to get so big now, and it was no way to hide it anymore. It was decided that she would admit to her pregnancy, but not revealing the father’s name until the press release.

Hell, it had been all over the tabloids for weeks now anyway, she’d never get peace before she told them what they wanted to hear.

She had called her manager Jack and her PA Monica in for a meeting as well, telling them about Justin. They were both completely stunned, even though they tried to hide it.

-“So, he wants in?” Jack asked. “Why?”

-“For God’s sake, Jack!” Monica argued. “Not all men are assholes, I think it’s totally adorable that he is so determined to be a part of this.”

-“I just wanne know what his motives are. Record sales dropping?”

-“Or just the desire to raise his own child, it shouldn’t be too hard to understand, even for you!”

And so they went on; Jack the big cynic and Monica the ever gullible one. Jordan smiled during their hour long argument that she wasn’t even a part of.

She wondered if they slept together, they had a fire and a passion while arguing that you almost only saw in lovers. They were so bad for each other they were almost good, ironically enough. She smiled thinking about it, the two people closest to her, the only two people she could almost call her friends.

Except the fact that she signed their pay checks, but it was the closest she got anyway.

They were both very considerate when it came to her condition, even though Jack pretended it was only because it was good publicity.

Anyway, it was good to have them around, they made her laugh, and they made her feel less alone.   

 Justin had never felt as alone in his life as he did when he pulled into his mother’s driveway. He hadn’t talked to Jessica since their conversation; he hadn’t tried to call her either. If she decided she wanted them to continue their relationship he was fine with that, but if she never wanted to see him again he was fine with that too.  

He had asked his father, step mom and Rachael to come over as well, wanting to tell the whole family at once.

When he had called he had just said he had something important to tell them, something he needed to say face to face, but that he was fine and they didn’t have to worry. He knew his mom still would.

He was met with open arms and lots of smile, they all tried to hide their eagerness to find out what he was home for, they wanted him to tell them when he felt it right.

He engaged in the conversations and laughed and smiled back, knowing they could all see through his façade. It was all awkward, like they were all waiting for a bomb to explode.

He finally told them during dinner.

-“So, uhm… I guess you all want to know what I’m here to tell you?” he started off.

-“Hell, yeah, finally!” Rachael said, leaning forward.

-“Well, I don’t know how to say this, so I’m just gonna tell you; I’m gonna be a father!” he said, opening his arms in a welcoming gesture and giving them all a smile he knew they could see through.

Now, it was out, and once again he was holding his breath waiting for the reaction.

 They were all gob smacked, and if this issue wasn’t as serious as it was he would be amused by how much they all looked alike with their mouths hanging open.

Suddenly Rachael started laughing.

-“Haha, very funny! This is to get us worked up before you tell us what’s really on your mind, right? Right?”

They all stared at him in unison.

-“No, it’s the truth, you’re gonna be grand parents and you are gonna be an aunt…Or almost, at least…”

Another minute of silence before his mother spoke out, barely able to get out a sound from her voice.

-“Oh, so…Jessica is pregnant?” He could hear the disappointment in his mother’s voice; he knew she had never been a huge fan of Jess.

-“No, actually it’s not her…”

-“I don’t understand” she continued. “You broke up?”

-“No, I don’t know, I…No, it’s actually… You know Jordan Callister?”

-“The actress?” his father asked surprised.

-“Yeah, it’s…it’s her…”

Another minute of silence before Paul started laughing.

-“Yeah, right! Bullshit!”

-“I’m not fucking kidding you”

-“You are having a baby with Jordan Callister? In your dreams! Not even you would get close to that woman” he continued.

-“No no, he’s telling the truth.” Rachael said stunned. “Trace told me about their fling at the Oscars”

-“Not exactly a fling, but yeah, that’s when it happened” Justin said silently.

-“Ok, so let me get this right;” Lynn started. “You had a one night stand, unprotected, with this movie star, and now she’s pregnant with your child?”

He nodded, a bit ashamed. His mother sighed before tears started running down her cheeks.

-“Mom, don’t get upset. I know it’s not the perfect situation, but this is how it is. We’re releasing a statement next week, and I just wanted to give you a heads up…”

-“Oh, how thoughful of you!” she said full of sarcasm.

-“Mom, please! This is tough enough as it is, I really need your support now!”

He started to break down, and Lynn immediately walked over to him, holding him while he cried in her arms, regretting how she selfishly handled this situation. But she didn’t know how to handle it, she had never in a million years expected this from Justin.

He was a constant worry for her, but not for these reasons. He was used to a stable family life, and that was all she wanted for him too, in the madness that was his life. She had always hoped he would end up with a family of his own, white picket fence, 2-3 kids and a loving wife. Something that would calm him down and make for stability.

But now he was about to have an illegitimate child with a famous movie star, one that he wasn’t even seeing.

They cried together as she stroked his back over and over again. It always got to her when her son was unhappy; she felt it deep down in her stomach. And now she would be a grand mother, would she even be allowed to get those feelings for this little baby?

-“I’m sorry” he cried, and she continued to pat his back, hushing him.

-“Don’t be, Justin, this is going to be fine. Everything will be okay.” She wasn’t convinced herself, but he needed to hear it from her. 

He stayed in Tennessee for two days, talking and crying with his whole family. It felt good to be able to be vulnerable, to scream in frustration without being judged.

His parents asked to meet Jordan, and he had promised he would ask her. He would actually beg her if he had to. This was so important to them and he felt he owed them that, owed them to get to know their grand child’s mother.  

When he got back to his house in LA he got a surprising phone call from Jessica. She came over to see him, telling him that she still wanted to make this relationship work, that she would grow to accept the situation, but that she needed him to be more committed than he had so far, invest a bit more in her to make up for the pain he caused her. He had just nodded and taken her up to bed.

He would agree to anything to feel someone in his arms during the night. 

He didn’t know if he should have called Jordan before their meeting with Ken. Was he supposed to check in on her? Would she even want him to?  

Once again Trace drove him over, he kept his head down through the gate, and he walked up to her front door. She opened it with a smile this time, and it set him back a bit.

She guided him to the couch again, the same couch he was sitting in a week ago, and offered him a drink.

-“Yeah, some tea maybe? Ken’s not here yet?”

She shook her head.

-“Running a bit late. I can get you something stronger if you’d like. You look like you may need it” she smiled at him again.

-“Uhm… You got any whiskey?”

She brought him back a glass half full of Jack Daniels and he downed it straight away.

-“Nervous?” she asked.

He nodded. How come every time he saw her he couldn’t speak? He needed to get a grip, act normal. How would he ever get to know her if he couldn’t talk to her?

-“Me too” she said, touching his shoulder in a comforting gesture as she leaned down to refill his glass.

-“So, I told my family…” he started, taking another sip.

-“Let me guess, they told you how disappointed they were, how you could have done better, the shame you put on your own family…”

He looked at her a bit surprised.

-“Well, no…They will always support me, and although they wish the situation was different, they are excited to become grand parents.”

-“Oh… Good for you!” she smiled sadly and stared at the floor.

-“Ehm… They want to meet you, though, and I promised them I would ask you…” he said nervously.

She thought about it for a while.

-“Sure…” she said a bit uncertain. “I can do that”

It felt like she said it more to herself than to him.

-“Thank you, that means a lot to them. And to me.”

She looked at her watch, and that exact moment the door bell rang.

-“Ken” they both said at the same time, which made them laugh awkwardly. 

Ken walked in and sat down, immediately opening his suitcase and turning on his laptop.

-“So, how are you kids doing? Ready to play house?”

Justin sighed, Ken could be so insensitive.

-“So, what do we say, Ken?” he asked.

-“Well, let’s do it tonight. A short one-pager, stating the facts, say how happy you both are, and asking the press to have respect for your situation and your reluctance to spread your personal life around. Not that they care, but we’ll say it anyway. How about Jessica, do we mention her?”

-“No” Justin stated firmly. “She’s got nothing to do with this, I don’t want her involved.”

-“You still together?”

-“Yeah…”

-“Then she’s involved. Does she want to make a statement on her own?”

-“I…don’t know… We haven’t talked about it”

He felt embarrassed that he hadn’t even though about her part in this.

-“Ok, so we’ll leave her out for now, but the press is gonna be all over it, asking you questions about her”

-“Fine, I’ll let her know.” He sighed.

-“So, guys, I hope you are ready for this; it’s gonna get crazy as soon as this is out. It will change your everyday lives, the paparazzi will follow your every step. And for you, Justin, if you thought they were bad with you and Jess I’m not even gonna tell you what you have to look forward to now. So enjoy your last day of peace!”

Justin and Jordan looked at each other, nodding slightly.

-“We know, Ken, we’re ready” he said, but inside he was scared as hell for what was awaiting him.