Patty stood by her locker, waiting on Penny to get out of class. Kids were hustling throughout the hall, their conversations mashed together in a loud buzz. Patricia was hardly hearing it or seeing the people whizz by or toss a paper ball or shove one another laughing. She had quite the confession to make: although it was tradition to wait by her locker for Penny so that they could head down to the cafeteria together, she wasn't really just standing there for that. After four years in this torturous school, seeing her best friend wasn't what was forcing her lips into a smile, oh no... there was something more...or rather, someone.

"Monkey!" was the last Patricia heard before the books she had clinging to her chest were violently slapped down, scattering all over the floor. Her lab sheets due at fifth period and the notebooks she had shamefully written 'JT + PH' throughout were spread all over the floor. The boys were already mixed into the crowd before she could identify them, but their laughter howled through the halls with some of the other white students. Patricia's happy mood dampened immediately and her face burned with embarrassment as she tried to push the high emotion of tears from overwhelming her.

"I swear to the good Lord, Patty, I'mma find all of 'em and kick 'em right where the sun don' shine!" That rant couldn't belong to anyone besides her best friend and Penny was sure enough knelt down, picking up the last notebook from the floor before Patricia could move.

"Thanks," Patricia said, whether it was for the book or the threat, she wasn't sure. Penny stood, dusting off her pastel pink dress that shaped out her tall, lean frame. Patricia could never where that, not with her hips and excessive bottom. Her soft belly would get in the way too. Penny was tight and toned. She ran cross-country and Patricia could probably run three solid blocks before passing out.

"These people got me all types of bothered and I just got this done," she said angrily, gesturing toward her freshly straightened hair. It was shiny and dark, and curled at the tips, resting nicely at her shoulders. Patty self-consciously smoothed down one of her two pigtails.

"Well, you still look gorgeous, girl, so it don't even matter, right?" Patricia said. Penny rolled her eyes and they started off towards the cafeteria. Patricia trailed slightly behind as the black boys stole glances at Penny as she walked along, ranting at her date with Eddie. Patricia didn't hear a word; all she saw was the sharp contrast in the way the boys looked at her in comparison to how they gawked at Penny.

"Are you listening to a word I'm saying?" Penny said, turning around to see Patricia was two feet behind. "Girl, I'm spilling my guts out and you're in Alaska back there. Come up here for Pete's sake!" Patricia went to walk up, excusing herself to the kids still lingering in the hall after the second bell rung.

"Patricia!" Her feet stuck to the ground, her whole body froze. Penny's face contorted much like the other students. Patricia knew she wasn't hallucinating when he popped up in front of her, dressed in his white button up and navy slacks. Even the blue of his pants brought out his eyes more. Patricia hadn't seen him since last week. His mother had said she wasn't needed for the week and Patricia had grown wary that she had somehow found out about their... study session. It still made her blush to think about, but she had thought about it all week. Especially since he kept to himself and his white friends at lunch, the only time they could see each other. Now he was standing in front of her, holding out a piece of folded paper. Everybody in the hall seemed to be staring.

"Wh-what are you d-doin'?" she managed to spit out. Justin glanced about, smirking slightly.

"I'm giving you a list of things my mama wants you to get before you come to work this afternoon. Franklin's Deli has her tab already, so just show Frank the note and he'll let you leave without paying." Patricia felt her chest deflate, feeling disappointed, but relieved at the same time. She wouldn't put it past Justin to just come up and say hello like it was normal, but a very small part of her wished it wasn't all just business when they did speak in public. She took the list; nevertheless, hoping it wasn't too long.

"Okay, I'll see you later then," Patricia said, wanting to cease the awkwardness. People had already gone their way once they saw the exchange was just work related. Justin, however, stayed put for just a moment longer. Patricia shifted beneath his gaze before he looked her over, his eyes scanning her from head to toe. The corner of his pouty pink lips twitched in an attempt not to smile before her body flamed.

"See ya," he mumbled, soft and velvet as he only could. He tucked his hands into his pockets before brushing past her, the fabric of his button up briefly grazing her arm. Penny stood in the emptying hall, her hands on her hips in an annoyed stance.

"Why can't his lazy ass mama go to the store herself?" she ranted. Patricia's hazy mind cleared as he looked up at her scowling best friend. "In fact, why can't the white boy do it for her? Leavin' a lady to carry bags..."

"It's not his fault," Patricia defended weakly, "Penny I'm gettin' paid to make their lives a little easier. Groceries ain't much to ask for."

"What about their lives are hard?" Penny asked rhetorically, "Havin' everything handed to ya must be tough!" She rolled her eyes and took a deep breath. Patricia laughed, linking their arms and dragging Penny up the hall.

"You're gonna have a stroke one day," Patricia giggled, "Justin's nice, trust me."

"Whatever..." Penny mumbled off, "I'm starvin'." With that, they quickly headed to the cafeteria as Penny continued on about Edward. Patricia was half aware of what she said -- Edward had taken her out twice since last Friday and had cooked her breakfast Saturday morning. They had lemonade on his porch steps later that night and he kissed her after church Sunday morning. Patricia had paid the most attention to that part, asking questions of what he did and it felt, but the conversation ceased when they joined their table, Edward having saved Penny a seat beside him. Patricia had to look away when they shared a brief kiss, making the entire table hoot and holler. Her stomach knotted up as she glanced over her shoulder to Justin's table. He was nowhere in sight and she quickly turned back to her friends, trying not to frown as Edward draped his arm around Penny's shoulders because that could never be her and Justin.

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"Patty, when am I gonna see ya, girl? You always work..." Patricia sighed and shrugged as her and Penny trailed to their halfway point.

"You're seeing me now," Patricia smirked, holding the folded list in her hand from Justin. She had yet to look at it, hoping it wasn't heavy. She only had so much arm strength.

"You know what I mean," Penny said, smacking her lips, "I'm going up north for school... I'mma miss my bestie." Patricia glanced over at her friend, seeing her pout in full swing. Patricia would miss her too - she was her better half; everything she wish she could be. Who would get her jokes? Who would do her make-up and not get mad when she said she felt ridiculous?

"Girl, we might as well get used to not seeing each other," Patty sighed, turning back to look at her friend. Penny had stopped walking to stand there and pout at their departing corner. Patricia halted her movements, turning back to her with a small smile. "Now don’t go makin’ ‘em faces. You knew it was gonna happen. We’re never gon’ see each other once ya up North, gettin’ that fancy education of yours. You won’t even ‘member me. ‘Specially if Mr. Eddie’s up there, doin’ his Broadway thing."

"Oh, Patty," Penny whined, "Why ain’t sad ‘bout this? Ain’t you gon’ miss me?" Patricia looked away, feeling a bubble in her throat. She shrugged though, looking at Penny with the best, warm smile she could muster.

"It hasn’t even happen yet," Patricia pointed out, "I’ll miss ya when you’re gone – I promise." Penny rolled her eyes, waving her off as she headed in the opposite direction.

"Be careful with them groceries. You don’t want them white folk to starve," Penny tossed over her shoulder before laughing out loud, "On second thought – "

"Penny!" Patricia scolded, listening to her cackle as she rounded the corner, smiling herself. She shook her head, knowing she’d miss that noise before she went into work mode. Her legs automatically hustled forward as she walked alone down the dirt road. She just needed to cross this old lot and she’d be behind the old General store and as soon as she finished there, she could be with Justin… see his face.

That prospect nearly made her tear open the list in her hand, but she calmed herself, slowly unraveling it. As the folds detached another folded paper fell out, silently hitting the group by her Mary Jane shoes, which were covered in dust she’d need to wipe off before getting to the Timberlakes’. Patricia bent down to retrieve it with a heave, quickly continuing onward as she looked over the list. Just milk, eggs, chicken and steak from the butcher up the road from Frank’s, and lemons were listed. Patricia was grateful that it wasn’t a mile long, but she then remembered the other paper; maybe Mrs. Timberlake ran out of space and needed two sheets. The very idea of such a heavy task made Patricia want to toss the other note and pretend she never saw it – it did fall out, technically speaking. She could pretend she hadn’t noticed and continued on, but Patricia couldn’t lie to anybody, herself included, so she opted to open up the other folded piece.

Instantly, she noticed the script differed from that of Mrs. Timberlake’s proper style – the crisp, Sunday school teacher cursive writing script. This writing was loopier and bigger. It was also written halfway in print and halfway in cursive – a habit of Justin’s writing type. Patricia had noticed during her study sessions or when she cleaned his room and gently ran her fingers against the lettering of notebooks he had left all over his desk.

Just knowing he wrote anything to her meant world, even if it was his own grocery list, but Patricia’s eager eyes landed on a short poem:

Patricia stared at the page, her eyes unbelieving. Maybe she had imagined this entire moment. She read the four lines over and over again. Justin’s loopy letters never changed and a smile broke across her face as she folded up the paper and tucked it securely in her notebook, pressed against her chest. Patricia giggled to herself, her cheeks warming as she replayed the poem in her head and ran to the General store.

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Patricia had tucked her notebook in the bag with the lemons. The meat was weighing her down as she crossed the busy street to get to the lot again. She couldn’t get the poem out of her head, even as the sun beamed down on her, feeling unseasonably warm. It gave her an excuse to be beaming as well. Maybe people would think she was appreciating the southern warmth instead of the poem from the lovely boy who wants to kiss her and thinks about her…

Patricia jumped when a horn blared so loudly it felt as though the car was on top of her. She closed her eyes, preparing to be run over, but the force never came. She did, however, feel the heat of the mental bumper against her exposed calf before she opened her eyes slowly, embarrassed and afraid of the driver. It was a fancy Chevrolet, cream colored and owned by a white man, more than likely. She would’ve had hell to pay had she not recognized the man behind the wheel.

"Mister…umm…. Mister Timberlake?" Patricia inquired as he leaned out his driver’s window, gesturing for the car behind him to go around.

"Get out the street, ya stupid nigger!" came a shout of the passing driver’s window. Patricia winced as the car sped away. She felt her warmth simmer down to nothingness as her eyes stung with tears. Her embarrassment deepened as Mr. Timberlake idled in the road.

"Don’t worry ‘bout ‘em!" he called out to her a moment later. "Ya workin’ tonight?" Patricia nodded, taking a deep breath as she relaxed her shoulders.

"Yes, sir," she answered, "I’m sorry for gettin’ in the way. I’ll keep your steak warm for when ya get home." She was almost to the other side of the road when he called again.

"Patricia!" She turned back; he was leant back smoothly in his caramel leather seat. His softly curled hair was waving back from a good combing and his white business shirt was hiked up to his elbows. Patricia saw him as Justin in twenty years though his face still held his youth in the way his eyes glowed in the sunlight. He gestured his head toward the passenger side. "Come on in and ride with me. I’m headin’ home anyway. No sense in you walkin’ in this heat." Patricia was stumped, glancing around to make sure she was hearing him right.

"Pardon me?" she inquired, fully on the other side now. Mr. Timberlake gestured for the cars doubled up behind him to go around again. The drivers seemed annoyed, shooting Patricia glares.

"Now come on, child, I’m making a mess of cars out here. The quicker we’re home, the quicker I eat!" Mr. Timberlake beamed, gesturing toward the passenger side again. Patricia looked up the road both ways before slowly making her back to his car. He watched her with a warm smile, leaning over the seat to unlock the door. Patricia stood at the passenger door now, glancing at the backseat and then at him.

"Do you want me to ride in the back?" she asked innocently. His booming laugh was huskier than Justin’s, but almost identical.

"Just hop on in, Patty; it’ll be all right." Patricia wasn’t so sure and she took a deep breath before checking around to make sure there were no eyes on her. She saw a few glances, even a set of ladies outside the saloon, smoking and staring. She felt like everybody was watching her and it wasn’t until Mr. Timberlake reached back over and unhinged the door, pushing it open to gently tap her leg that she came back to reality.

"Patty, let’s go," he said, "I’m wastin’ gas." Patricia didn’t want Mr. Timberlake to be angry with her so she finally slipped inside, placing the groceries between them as she sat in her seat, the warm leather heating up the backs of her thigh and neck. She reached over and pulled the door shut, the slam being much louder than she wanted it to be, but Mr. Timberlake sped off before she could clearly see the reactions of their departure.

"So I’ve gone to see Dr. George Hemans," Mr. Timberlake started, reaching over Patricia’s lap to open his glove department. Patricia didn’t breathe, not wanting to get in the way as he fiddled. "Ya ever heard of him?" Patricia waited for him to grab his pack of cigarettes and sit back before answering.

"No, sir," she said, "But I reckon he must be a fine doctor if you’ve spoken to him."

"Oh, he is," Mr. Timberlake assured, having lit his cigarette by the time she replied. He tossed the empty pack into the backseat of his car, "He might be able to help your mama." Patricia’s heart jerked in her chest.

"Oh, that would be wonderful if he could," Patricia said, not being able to stop the smile on her face. She couldn’t remember the last time her mama had slept through the night without a hacking cough and sweating fits. She seemed to have gotten worst over the last week. Maybe it was because Patricia was too busy with Justin in her mind to be as attentive. Her stomach ached with guilt.

"He can and he will," Mr. Timberlake assured, blowing a long stream of smoke from his nostrils. The smell was overwhelming and it made Patricia’s eyes water, but she just turned her face toward the passenger window, letting the warm wind caress her face. "I’ve set up an appointment with him for tomorrow night. You think you can be there for that?" Patricia’s heart sank a little when she realized it was a doctor’s visit that wouldn’t come free – especially from a rich doctor Mr. Timberlake recommends.

"I’d love to have Dr. Hemans come over, but we can’t afford –"

"Money is not an issue, dear," Mr. Timberlake told her gently, finishing off his cigarette, "The bill is in my name. I just want your mama on her feet again. I know how hard you’re working – Justin told me you do everything for your brother and mother. No young lady should have to suffer so much. You need to be enjoying yourself." Patricia bit her bottom lip, feeling her eyes well up with tears. There was a pressure in her chest like she couldn’t hold down. Her warm tears streaked down her face and she quickly wiped them away. She could see where Justin got his kindness from; his understanding and sweet words.

"Mr. Timberlake, sir, you have no idea how much this means to me," Patricia said softly, sniffling and wiping away tears.

Mr. Timberlake gave a quick glance to her tear stained face before gently panting her knee. "It’s okay, dear. No need to be upset. This is good news."

"And these are happy tears," Patricia assured with a soft smile. "I’m so thankful…"

"I know, which is why I’m doing this," he told her, "You really appreciate what people do. You’ve always been respectful, even to my wife and we both know she’s not the easiest to get along with." They shared a laugh over that and Patricia was relieved to know he had noticed her unkindness.

"You’ve always be so nice to me and mama, Mr. Timberlake," Patricia smiled, "I feel like I can’t even give you something in return. Especially for something like this…"

"Sure you can me lots of things," he argued jokingly, "You can make me the best damn steak in Tennessee tonight. How ‘bout it?" Patricia laughed and nodded, wiping off the last of her tears.

"I can definitely do that," she smiled, "But thank you again."

"No, thank you…for that delicious steak!" Mr. Timberlake howled with laughter, nearly sending Patricia into hysterics herself as the slowly pulled up his street. She hadn’t even realized they made it to their destination so soon. She wiped her face more quickly now, trying to look presentable enough for Justin without seeming too anxious. Mr. Timberlake parked with ease behind his other car – a black Camero – before grabbing all of the grocery bags, leaving Patricia bag free.

"I can carry som-"

"I’ve got it," he interrupted, "Just get the door." He jingled the keys dangling off his pinky finger. She took them hesitantly and glanced up at him for reassurance. He gently closed the car door with his foot before gesturing up the stairs. "Go on now," he encouraged and Patricia felt the weight of the keys as she hurried to the top of the stairs.

She had seen Justin open the door a million times, so she recognized the key in the mist of the hundreds that seemed to hang from Mr. Timberlake’s key loops. Patricia wished it was her house for a moment when she stuck the key in the door, but that dream was immediately shattered when the door was swung open by such force that Patricia stumbled forward, losing her grip on the keys that stayed attached to the door.

The vicious and seemingly permanent scowl on Mrs. Timberlake’s face was directed at Patricia and then turned to her husband. "What the devil is going on?" she asked, her stern voice freezing Patricia into place as if she were guilty. Mrs. Timberlake’s furious eyes narrowed in her direction. "Did I not send you to the market?" she sneered and Patricia looked back at Mr. Timberlake who was swiftly rolling his eyes.

"Dear, please; don’t you feel the weather?" he asked, "It’s hotter than the belly of snake on desert ground. No time for all this nonsense –"

"But you’re carrying all this stuff by yourself and it isn’t fair for me to pay her if you’re doin’ all her work," Mrs. Timberlake whined, ruffling her skirt angrily. "Oh, she’s nothing like her mother, Randall! Nothin’ at all! She’s just a lazy nig –"

"Lynn," Mr. Timberlake said gently, but with authority. Patty had already turned to stare at the polished wood of the porch. Her eyes were glassed over. He turned back to his wife, cooing to her, "I’ve already got my foot in the door, dear. What’s complaining gonna do?"

"But –" Mrs. Timberlake started, but Mr. Timberlake shook his head to silence her.

"Not another word, Lynn, ‘cause I wanna eat," he smirked, lifting his elbow and leaning over enough to graze Patricia’s shoulder, "The quicker we get in the quicker I get my steak, ain’t that right young lady?" Patricia took a deep breath, still embarrassed, but less afraid. She nodded.

"Yes, sir," she answered meekly before turning back to Mrs. Timberlake’s never ending scowl, "And I’m sorry, Mrs. Timberlake. I offered to carry them, but he insisted." Patricia heard the tone she used just as Mrs. Timberlake’s eyebrow twitched. She didn’t sound very sorry at all, but she most certainly didn’t owe Mrs. Timberlake an apology. Mrs. Timberlake curled her lip back to spew her venom, but Mr. Timberlake chimed in.

"I most certainly did," he confirmed before Mrs. Timberlake could argue, "Now, darlin’, I’d love to put these things down and change into my house slippers." Mrs. Timberlake slowly tore her eyes from Patricia’s profile (Patricia had smoothly turned to look away when Mrs. Timberlake almost went into her vent) and she sighed, never being able argue with her husband. Lynn felt like she did when she meant him in church all those years ago; young and naïve.

She loved him too much to spoil his dinner, even if she couldn’t stand the lazy maid she paid to do nothing – at least that’s what it seemed like to her. Patricia spent too much time laughing with her son and not carrying groceries. A little sweeping and cooking didn’t make her perfect, despite her husband’s inability to hate her as much as she did. Mrs. Timberlake was convinced his love for Patricia’s mother left him defenseless against her almost identical (with the exception of her health and youth, and housekeeping skills) daughter. Just a minor soft spot, she thought, one that over time would fade so he’d be able to see things more clearly.

She didn’t like it, but she moved from the doorway, gesturing for him to trot through. Patricia waited for the mistress to follow, but Mrs. Timberlake waited and watched her husband trail through the living room and disappear into the kitchen before whipping her head back to Patricia, hissing quietly, "Don’t think for a minute I don’t see what you’re doin’," she said, jabbing her finger in Patricia’s confused face, "You won’t be able to play cute much longer, nigger! I’m not payin’ you to stand around while my husband picks you and carries groceries I sent you out to get. The next time I see something like that, you better trust that I’ll –"

"Patricia, could you get the steaks started!" Mr. Timberlake’s voice came booming from the kitchen, resounding out onto the porch where Patricia stood, sweating and grateful for the disruption.

"I should get dinner started, Miss…" she mumbled to her Mary Jane shoes. Mrs. Timberlake turned back into the house without a word, her fancy heels clicking furiously. Patricia let go of the breath she was holding, never more grateful to get to work. The steak would make her forget that face and those words she hated.

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Justin tried to look preoccupied with his geometry as he leant his head against his palm, resting on his arm for support. His textbook was wide open, notebook laid halfway over it, and he even had a pencil in hand, but he had yet to answer question one of his twenty question take home exam. How could he be worried about mindless octagons and square feet when there were so many shapes (or rather shapely objects) to hold his attention?

Plus that steak that was searing against the pan smelled so good his stomach was clawing at it. Justin wish he could blame the food for the entire lurching of his gut, but his hunger was deeper than the pit of his stomach. At some points it didn’t feel much deeper than his groin, but other times it felt like something was yanking at his chest…Then he thought about her chest and the way it squished against his body when he pressed up against her in the kitchen.

His eyes shifted to the basin where she had casually washed dinner plates as he finished up his English homework, something he now looked forward to because they had conversations and laugh. Math and science wasn’t Patricia’s specialty, so she quietly moved about the kitchen to let him work in piece. She was so considerate and he was wasting that kindness to let his eyes languidly travel back to her hips, watching as they swayed. The dress she wore didn’t have a bow like the others, but there was a band high at her waist, pinching her in a bit. When he could see her front, he’d run his eyes along that same band, thanking it for being so perfectly placed below her plush breasts.

"Justin?" Patricia’s voice added to the tension in his lower abdomen and he jumped from the jolt her voice caused up his spine. Patricia looked at him wearily, stopping short her walk towards the island where he sat on his stool. He smiled a bit to ease the awkwardness.

"Sorry, I was just… concentrating so hard on these stupid problems…" It wasn’t a complete lie, he convinced himself, he was concentrating…and hard.

"Well, okay…" Patricia mumbled, "I don’t mean to bother you, but I’m makin’ something a lil’ different tonight. I wanted to know if you’d like to test it out first. I don’t want your mama gettin’ any angrier with me." Justin rolled his eyes, grunting as he pushed himself up from the stool. Patricia watched as his muscles flexed beneath his short sleeved cotton button up, striped in red and green. He looked like Christmas, Patricia had first thought, and she meant it well. Christmas was her favorite holiday and Justin would be her favorite gift if she could have him.

"Don’t you worry ‘bout my mama. She’ll come ‘round," Justin assured, slowly making his way around the island, glancing back towards kitchen’s entrance to make sure nobody was coming or going. Patricia looked as well for a moment, to reassure that they were okay, that Justin slowly approaching her wasn’t being watched.

"I highly doubt your mama will come around," Patricia mumbled, tearing her eyes away from the entrance in time to watch Justin stop in front of her, close enough to get them into trouble should anybody walk in the door. She felt herself recoiling, even though he smelt good and the peach fuzz growing along his jaw looked like it would feel nice rubbing up against her skin…

"Did you get my note?" Justin whispered to her softly, his breath smelled like the pear he was eating earlier. Her mouth watered at the prospect of that said pear being the flavor of his soft, pink lips…Then she remembered the question and the sweet poem she wanted sewn on the sleeve of her favorite sweater.

"It was very sweet," Patricia shyly responded, staring at the red buttons of his shirt, "Nobody’s written anything to me before."

"Well I wrote about a million other ones before I finally just gave you that one -" Justin cut himself short when Patricia's wide eyes met his. Maybe he had said too much? His cheeks flared with a red he was certain didn't flatter him. "Umm...yeah..." Patricia smiled when he looked away, seemingly embarrassed with his cherry blush.

"That's so... thoughtful," Patricia awkwardly comforted, "I mean... That's a lot of trouble over me and I appreciate that... I'd love to read 'em all if you'll let me." Justin hesitantly glanced back down at her, still wanting to kick himself, but she looked sincere, biting her bottom lip like he liked.

"Okay..." he said softly, "I can give 'em to you tomorrow. I left the notebook at school." Patricia nodded, their exchange becoming increasingly more uncomfortable. They were discussing reading love poems he wrote for her, of all people. His one poem made her entire being flame, let alone a notebook of them. Patricia's stomach knotted up at the surrealism of the situation. Justin Randall Timberlake, rich, handsome, and white as he was wrote a notebook of poetry for her.

She shook her head subconsciously. Justin smirked as he watched her, curious. "What?" he asked and Patricia shrugged, turning back to the stove once she remembered she was cooking. She winced a bit when she forked up the last steak from the pan, the bottom side being a lot browner than intended. Hopefully Mrs. Timberlake wouldn't notice.

"Dang it!" Patricia hissed beneath her breath, turning off the heat completely. Who was she kidding? Mrs. Timberlake would surely notice.

"I'll take that piece," Justin offered from behind her. Patricia smiled over her shoulder meekly.

"Thanks," she sighed, "I just don't want your mama having a heart attack over it."

"You worry too much about my mama," Justin said as she turned back to the stove, wiping it down with a rag she grabbed from the oven door handle.

"You don't worry enough," Patricia said back, but Justin had easily found her cleaning to be enticed, the way she moved her entire body in sync with her circular cleaning motion. Justin glanced back at the door once more to assure their solitude before he moved up closer once she stood up straight. He hugged her around her waist, eliciting a small gasp from her soft mouth. He pulled her body flush against him; her back against his chest and her bottom pressed against his crotch. Her scent was overwhelming, menthol and honey sweetness.

"Damn you smell good," he whispered, bring his other arm around her waist as well, fully hugging her from behind. He ran his nose over her woven hair and down the side of her face, his lips grazing her ear. He felt her tremble against him and it overwhelmed him to have that sort of effect on her.

"You're tryna get us killed, aren't you?" Patricia said softly. He felt her shaky hands rest against his forearms, running over his skin. His trembled at her innocent, gentle touch.

"I'd die happy at least," he said softly, "You feel so good just like this, Patty. This is nice." He was in a happy place littered with sexual tension and honest feelings. He could hold her this way, but he wanted to see her face. With that in mind, he slowly pulled back to spin her around to face him. Patricia clumsily tripped over her own feet, staring at his chest when he caught her and held her in place. Justin smiled, pressing his hand against her cheek. It was as hot as his face felt.

"I've got two left feet," Patricia mumbled to his Christmas button up, "That's what my mama says."

"I don't mind," Justin assured, lifting her chin with the pad of his index finger. Her face was so smooth and beautiful. He loved the browns of his eyes against the brown of her skin. He loved the way her lashes, long and luscious, curled and gave her doe eyes. He especially loved the way she bit her bottom lip nervously, completely unaware of what that simple gesture did to him.

"Your daddy told me something good today," Patricia said, rambling as he watched her face, glancing at her mouth as it molded around her words, "'Said he's gonna get a real good doctor to look after my mama." Justin smiled, running his thumb along her bottom lip. He swallowed when he felt the moist, soft flesh.

"That's great," he said distractedly and Patricia held her breath when he leant down and gently kissed the corner of her mouth. "I'm really happy for you..." His face was so close it blurred in her line of vision. She felt his peach fuzz stubble against her cheek; it felt better than she imagined. It was rough and prickly at first, but warm and less abrasive as his skin touched hers.

"M-me too..." she stammered, "I-I'm happy...that y-you're happy..." She wanted to smack herself for being so faint hearted. He was just standing there, close and strong and tall as ever. She felt so small, but in an entirely good way, like nothing could ever come and hurt her as long as he was there. Protected is what she felt - yes; protected. That was new, especially when who was protecting her was who she was taught to be her enemy. It was weird to look at Justin that way - threatening or even white. She didn't see him as a color or danger, but she never forgot the world's view of things. She never forgot what could happen if the world found out.

Justin stroked her cheek with his thumb, eyeing her mouth without a hint of shame, except for the cherry tint of his cheeks. Patricia was starting to adore that color. "I've been thinkin'..." Justin said softly, his warm breath caressing her lips, "There's this place I've been wantin' to take you to..." Patricia pushed down the excitement in her belly because any place was a public place and they couldn't go anywhere without trouble.

"You know we can't go anywhere," Patricia said just as softly, disappointed by the world because she'd give anything to watch a movie or hold his hands like things were normal.

"It's not just anywhere," Justin smirked, "It's a secret place." Patricia's interest peeked and she searched his eyes as his smile grew slightly wider.

"A secret place?" She could hardly believe there could be secrets in such a small town. "Where?"

"Some place real special to me," Justin answered evasively, a mischievous smile spreading across his face, "I used to go there all the time. It's open, but I could hide there for hours and nobody would ever see me." Patricia found this place enticing, but she couldn't even figure out a time in her mind where she could escape to go to this secret place. Her life revolved around school, work, and home. She didn't have fun or lazy around.

"I'd love to go with you, but I couldn't figure out how to find the time to -" Justin pressed his finger to her moving mouth, shushing her. She tasted the salt of his fingertip.

"Don't worry 'bout that," Justin said gently, "I'll get you away. I just need you to want to come along."

"Of course I want to come along -" Patricia started before being interrupted again.

"Then it's settled," Justin smirked, "Just you and me tomorrow then, huh? And our secret place." Patricia let the chill run up her spine when he said 'our'. She was included; it was their secret place. He was taking her some place where they could be alone. She nervously bit her bottom lip again, not missing the way Justin watched her mouth as she did so. Her stomach quaked.

"Patricia!" The shrill cry of Mrs. Timberlake sent Justin and Patricia flying, their eyes alarmed and wide as they searched the kitchen for her, but let out a sigh of relief when they realized she was calling from the living room. Patricia glanced at Justin and he smiled, causing them both to burst out laughing.

"I'm comin', Mrs. Timberlake!" Patricia called back, hurrying out, but pausing at the kitchen door to giggle. Justin's whole body was still electrified from her and the near heart attack that accompanied the danger of being seen together. To watch her suppress her laughter before casually strolling out the kitchen made him chuckle at his own self. They wouldn't have to worry about surprising anything or being caught at his hideout. They could just be and the thought made his whole stomach swarm with butterflies.

Tomorrow was going to be more than interesting.

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Patricia was exhausted and her wore out Mary Janes were causing her feet to beg for mercy. It was as if they were walking forever, trudging through the light woods across the back parts of Justin's neighborhood. The trees blocked some sun, but rays still shined down on them, the tree tops created a heated cocoon of sorts. Her gray linen dress was sticking to her skin. She felt miserable and she was sure the mosquitoes were tearing up her skin as they moved down unstable land. Justin was sweating somewhat, but nothing in comparison to her. He was much more active and obviously more prepared for their mini-hiking expedition.

Patricia was too busy slapping away spider webs and greenery to dwell on his superior physicality. It wasn't until he slowed at the top of a risen section of the land did she acknowledge him. He turned, smiling brightly in his white, crisp polo; gesturing toward the break in the trees at a low pasture a few feet ahead. "We're here!" he announced, overjoyed. Patricia took in 'here' with careful eyes. There was the town's small lake a little ways away with low cut grass and flat rocks to sit on. There was even a wooden bench by the water she could image sitting on, watching the houses light up at night. Patricia also spotted a field of lilacs, seemingly out of place, surrounding a small, shack-like structure closer to where they stood. The windows were decapitated and the rickety screen door with holes all in the black mesh squeaked as the breeze slowly flapped it open.

Their secret place.

"Wow," she voiced, truly speechless because even if it wasn't a getaway home, it was still theirs. They were too far away to clearly be seen, but close enough to feel the safety of familiarity. There was a dock with a small fishing boat tied to it, floating in the lake. It would've been easier to cross the water, but Patricia was sure that would've been too obvious.

"Do you like it?" Justin asked, beaming. He had made the small jump down from where they were both standing to land on the lower grass. He turned and took the place in before facing Patricia.

Patricia looked him over; at the leaf in his cropped hair and the dirt stains in his polo and khakis. The amount of dirt and dust on his brown leather shoes made her want to shine them up immediately. He was still handsome though and she still felt small even though the unleveled ground made her unfairly taller than him in the moment.

"I feel... safe," Patricia answered and he cocked an eyebrow.

"You should," he smiled up at her, walking back under where she stood. He reached his arms out and she was baffled for a moment. "I'mma catch you. Just jump on down here with me." Patricia suddenly became self-conscious about her weight. She suddenly heard the rumors about white boys being weaker than black boys. She also remembered how strong and warm his hands were when he gripped her hips against his kitchen sink. Patricia would gladly fall so long as he had touched her in the process. Being in their secret place made her thoughts less embarrassing. It made her braver too.

"'kay, here I come," she announced, squatting a bit, trying to be as lady-like as possible. She was sure Justin could see up her skirt at this angle, but he kept his eyes glued to hers - almost too glued like he was making himself not look. The idea of him wanting to look up her skirt made excitement surge through her and her face warmed.

"I've gotcha," Justin cooed, moving up to reach and grab her hips with his oversized hands as she lowered herself. He heaved when she jumped down, gripping her tighter and hugging her down to him. They both stumbled back and laughed as they tried to balance.

"I thought you had me!" Patricia jokingly scolded as they stood up straight, still hugging chest to chest.

"You're in my arms, aren't you?" Justin pointed out, giving her waist a squeeze for emphasis. Patricia smiled shyly at him, feeling his heated body on hers, lined with sweat wherever their skin touched.

"I guess I am..." she mumbled, letting him look over her face as she turned away, staring off at the lake as the sun's reflection glistened in it. She was thankful for the breeze the water provided; it felt good against her slick skin. They were silent for a moment, unmoving. Patricia could still feel him staring at her before she even turned back to look him in the eyes.

"What are you thinkin' 'bout?" he asked quietly, staring at her intently with his gray-blue eyes.

"I'm wonderin' why you keep starin' at me," Patricia answered honestly, "I don't think there's much to look at." Justin's glow seemed to dim at her negativity and she tried to recover. "I'm not sayin' I'm real ugly or anything... I just... I dunno..." It was weird to defend herself, especially when she honestly didn't think it was wrong to be honest - she really didn't see herself as worthy of gawking. Her friends were the ones that were seen, never her. It was natural and logical to be aware of her mediocrity.

"I will never understand how beautiful people never see that beauty in themselves," Justin said simply, not quite addressing her.

"Well... do you think you're beautiful?" Patricia challenged, Justin shrugged.

"I wouldn't use the word beautiful to describe a man, but I wouldn't mind saying handsome... I don't think I'm the best thing walkin' God's earth, but I'd like to think I'm pretty important." Patricia bit her lip to stop herself from saying he was the best thing walking on God's green earth because she had never seen someone more beautiful in her life, but she kept it to herself, not wanting to say too much too soon.

"Well, you're important to me," Patricia said meekly, staring at his Adam's apple in the moment, "I mean... we've got a special place and all..."

"It is quite special," Justin voiced, "I've never taken anybody here before... I've never even told anybody about it." Patricia felt her heart swell with the weight of his secret place and his sharing of it with her.

"Thank you for sharing it with me," she told him, gently standing on her tip toes to kiss his cheek, which flamed up red again.

"N-no problem," he stammered, kissing her cheek in return. They started to sway to an imaginary beat as the wind continued to go by, cooling them.

Patricia wrapped her arms around his neck, closing her eyes as she rested her ear to his chest, listening to the rapid pace of his heart beat. Justin let his hand rest on the curve of her bottom and the other hand caressed her shoulders and traced the woven stitching of her hair.

"So... what did you tell your mama about me missing work today?" Patricia asked, curious to know how he managed to get her to miss work without her having to speak to anybody. She was also starting to feel uncomfortably comfortable in his arms; it was almost too easy to be silent and close to him. Patricia couldn't do that with anybody. She always felt the need to fill up silence; she always feared the person would be bored with her.

"Well, I told her you were sick with stomach issues and would think it better to stay home today." Patricia wrinkled her nose as Justin laughed out loud. Patricia took the opportunity to slowly pull back from their embrace.

"As foul as that is, at least it worked," Patricia said, kicking a small batch of pebbles at her feet as she took a step back from where Justin stood, watching her movements.

"Yes and she wasn't much interested in details, so it was real easy," Justin explained, moving up to where Patricia was standing. He slowly ran his hands down her arms, past her wrists, to the tips of fingers. A chill ran straight through her before he raised both his hands, palms facing hers. Patricia imitated him as he looked at her expectantly. A second later he pressed his palms against hers, observing the difference in size and length before intertwining their fingers.

Again, they were silent. Patricia's heart was getting out of control. She was so nervous and they weren't doing anything, but she didn't know if that were a problem. Should they be closer? Was he okay with just hand holding? Was the dress she wearing too plain? Maybe she should've burrowed something, today was special after all.

She was too busy overthinking to see that Justin was slowly closing the space between them, gently folding their entwined hands inward between their bodies; the backs of her hands were against his abdomen. She felt the cotton of his shirt and the light caress of his lips against her neck. Her eyes closed as his mouth skimmed along her jaw and she took a deep breath when he brushed against her earlobe.

"I'm so happy you're here..." he whispered, kissing behind her ear sweetly. She licked her lips, but her entire mouth felt dry as he further kissed down her neck, making her tilt her head to the side as he moved lower, kissing along the collar of her dress. His hands detangled from hers, her arms falling to her sides as he hugged her body closer. He stopped his neck torture to kiss her chin, her cheek, and her nose. Patricia slowly opened her eyes to find him looking back, licking the taste of her salty skin from his lips.

Damn she was hot and now the lake breeze couldn't cool her. Justin holding her wasn't helping; Justin kissing her neck and face wasn't helping either. She needed a little space and her limp arms raised, her hands coming to rest against his chest in an attempt to push back, but she felt the strong outlines of his sculpted form, his skin heated and his heartbeat against her fingers. His eyes seemed to darken as he licked his lips. She watched his navy blue orbs trail down to her lips.

"Can I... I mean, is it okay - " Justin cut himself off with groan, closing his eyes momentarily. Patricia was confused.

"What is it?" she asked, her hands slipping down his chest accidently. His breath seemed to hitch because of it and Patricia dropped her arms to her side all together, "Sorry." Justin laughed at her apology.

"It's okay," Justin smiled, "It feels good when you touch me." Patricia's stomach tightened at his words.

"Oh..." she mumbled, knowing it wasn't the best response, but having nothing else to say. The idea of making Justin feel good with just a touch was surreal to her.

"Is it okay for me to say stuff like that?" Justin asked, "You're not uncomfortable, are you?" Patricia shrugged and looked down at the slither of space between them.

"I'm uncomfortable with everything, so that doesn't matter," Patricia said, trying to laugh at herself, but she was embarrassed by her lack of experience with all things physical.

"You'll get used to it," Justin assured gently, kissing her cheek to get her attention. She slowly lifted her eyes to his, "I'll ease you into this. We have a lot of time for us."

"Us?" Patricia asked. First they have their own special place and they were an 'us'.

"Yes, us," Justin smirked. Patricia fought the smile on her face, "Is that a problem? You don't like 'us'?" He poked her side and made her giggle.

"I dunno..." Patricia shrugged as best she could, glancing away, "I've never had an 'us' before...I mean, aren't we suppose to be...like...together?" Justin shrugged when she looked up. His blush was returning.

"I assumed we were there..."

"Where?" Patricia asked innocently.

"Ya know...a couple or something," Justin mumbled off, never once being one for titles. He suddenly felt like the inexperienced one as Patricia smiled sweetly at him.

"So... I'm like your girl or something, right?" she clarified.

"Right," Justin confirmed. Patricia giggled, not knowing how to take the news.

"All my friends kiss boys first before they're a couple," Patricia announced, glancing away, "We haven't done that." Justin removed a hand from her waist to lift her chin. Patricia was forced to look at him.

"We can change that now if you want," Justin said smoothly, running his thumb across her bottom lip. Patricia glanced at his mouth, feeling her fear overwhelm her.

"We could..." she said nervously. Justin stayed silent, watching. She wished he'd just kiss her and get it over with. She didn't want to have to say it. "Am I suppose to ask or something?"

"Is that your way of asking?" Justin smiled. Patricia rolled her eyes.

"I guess so..." she mumbled. He looked over her face, his hand skimming along her jaw. Patricia waited, the trees rustling in the breeze. Justin continued gazing at her and she was confused. Was it supposed to take this long? She wondered, but didn't want to ask.

"You seem impatient," Justin said teasingly, "These things are suppose to just happen."

"Then what's the point of me asking?" Patricia asked, confused.

"You didn't actually ask," Justin smiled, kissing the tip of her nose. Patricia furrowed her brows.

"What do you want me to do, Mr. Timberlake?" Patricia said, "Do a cheer or something?"

"You'd sure look cute in one of those cheering skirts," Justin pointed out, causing Patricia to blush.

"You're two eggs short of a dozen, I'm tellin' you," Patricia grumbled, letting him kiss her cheek next. She sighed when he kissed the corner of her mouth.

"I'm only crazy when it comes to you, Miss. Hurley," Justin said, leaning towards her again to kiss her other cheek. "And you still haven't asked, by the way..." Patricia could barely hear him before he was kissing on her jaw again, up to her ear.

"Justin..." she mumbled, not knowing what to say next.

"Yes?" he whispered back, kissing her ear.

"I'm not good at this kind of stuff..." she reluctantly confessed as he gnawed at her lobe. She moaned softly, her fingers running up the back of his neck to the base of his cropped hair. Justin's whole body reacted to her simple gesture; his skin flaring with surprised feelings. He never wanted anything, or rather anyone, so badly before, but he had to keep it together and not be overly aggressive. Patricia wasn't lying; she wasn't good with this kind of stuff.

"Fine," he said gently, pulling back from their embrace enough to see her eyes, "You don't have to ask... We can save that stuff for later..." Patricia furrowed her brows and Justin gave her a mischievous smile she couldn't quite understand.

"What does that mean?" she asked, but he ignored her, cupping her face in his warm hands. She held her breath, exhaling slowly when he rested his forehead against hers.

"Just close your eyes," he instructed and her lids obeyed before she could think to follow his words. He brushed his nose against hers and her breathing hitched, her heart thumping against her chest. She worried about her breathing and the softness of her lips. She worried if her breath smelled like the pear they shared halfway here; the same pear he bit and gave to her to bite and eat as well. She wondered if he tasted like pears and what a kiss felt like. She worried that her full lips were as big and ugly as some of the white kids said they were. She wondered until she felt a feather-like brush of flesh on flesh and her mind went blank when a slight pressure further meshed them together.

Patricia froze in place when Justin kissed against her top lip; his mouth warm and sweet. A chill ruptured within her core from the taste and feel of him. She sighed softly, parting her lips a bit. Justin felt her breath and pressed forward, deepening the kiss. He massaged her lips with his, feeling her fingers glide against the nape of his neck as she moaned into his mouth. His groin tightened at the sound of her and he groaned when she finally relaxed in his arms and pressed her mouth back against his.

Her compliance excited him; his lips picking up an urgent pace. Patricia further moaned, holding onto him tighter, gripping his hair a little stronger as she tried to get him closer. Justin, reluctantly, broke their kiss, taking a much needed breath. Patricia did the same, her lips tingling. She saw Justin's lips were pinker than before when she glanced down at his mouth. Justin watched her watch him and his body pushed him to carry on, but he knew he needed to slow down.

He brushed his lips on hers a second later, not being able to resist that much, but too scared to initiate another kiss. Patricia, however, pressed her lips against his and she tasted and felt better than he had remembered, his body reacting accordingly, pulling her closer and skimming his tongue against her bottom lip. She opened her mouth to him, her hesitance gone momentarily. His tongue laced with hers, gently coercing her to imitate his motions. She moved with him, slowly and deeply, her innocence evident in the way her fingers shook as she ran them through his cropped curls.

Her soft moans and light scraping of his scalp was almost too much with the feel of her lips. His stomach tightened as he felt the blood rushing to his lower half; their bodies too close together for him to deny what was happening. He couldn't push himself on her, knowing she'd feel him and not understand. As much as he wanted to teach her everything about what she did to him, he figured it was too soon, and against his body's wishes, he pulled back from their kiss. The moan of protest he elicited from her didn't help him, but he stood his ground, offering her one last, small kiss.

"I keep forgetting to take a breath," Patricia said, her chest slightly heaving as she licked her lips, a shy smile spreading across her face, "I like...kissing you..." Justin wanted to moan at the innocent look on her face, completely oblivious to the battle he was having internally. A part of him knew he could coerce her to do more than just kiss - he had his fair share of girls and though they all had a bit more experience than Patricia, some hadn't been particularly easy until he whispered all the things him and his friends would laugh about later.

He frowned at the thought of ever treating Patricia that way. He frowned for having treated girls that way. He knew Patricia wouldn't like that side of him, but he had never cared enough, especially since he felt entitled in his youth to do as he pleased. Patricia was different though. She made him want to go slow so he could appreciate every moment with her.

"I like kissing you too," Justin said, kissing her lips again for emphasis before pulling all the way back from her. Patricia pouted involuntarily, making Justin laugh. "Don't make that face. There's more of that to look forward to." Patricia looked away, fighting the smile on her face as she played with her hands.

"I didn't say anything," she said with a shrug, "I just figured that's what you wanted to do all day." Justin watched her shift her weight, her light gray dress moving against the breeze. Patricia finally raised her eyes to his and he smirked.

"Trust me, I want to, but we got some explorin' to do," he announced, reaching out for her hand. Patricia glanced down at his peachy palm and laid hers on top, letting him entwine their fingers. She stared down at their hands for a moment, not believing the difference in shades, out in the sun where God could see. It made her feel less afraid, less hidden.

"Explorin'?" she questioned after a second. Justin was watching her watch their hands, feeling the same way her face told him she was feeling: amazing, excited, and fearless.

"There's more to my secret place than this," he announced, there's a stream a little ways up and I know I left a couple fishing' rods up there -"

"Wait, we goin' fishing'?" Patricia asked, wrinkling her nose. Justin raised a brow and shrugged.

"What's wrong with fishing'?" Justin asked before scoffing at an idea, "Don't tell me you're one of those girls that can't get their hands dirty."

"I hiked down here, didn't I?" Patricia shot back, "Hell, I cleaned your room. Nothing’s dirtier than that!" Justin gasped in false offense.

"Whatever, woman," he said, leading her towards a path behind the decapitated shed, "I'll catch us somethin' and you can fry it up tomorrow." Patricia frowned, letting herself be dragged along.

"I'd much rather be kissin' you," Patricia announced and Justin shook his head.

"That's not gettin' you outta this," Justin said, kissing her knuckles as they moved along the grass and rock ridden dirt, "You'll have fun, trust me." Patricia gave his hand a squeeze, smiling to herself at his words.

"I trust you," she told him as she glanced away when he smiled at her, giving her hand a gentle squeeze back.