Jamie stared at the ceiling when she awoke the next morning, thinking about the events that occurred the previous night. She didn’t feel saddened by the engagement, or at least she was convincing herself she otherwise. Justin had every right to make her mother happy; he was her boyfriend after all. It was how she was making Vita feel that made Jamie remain in the comfort of her bed sheets. They were cool to her body and she loved that feeling it gave her in this humid atmosphere; both climatically and rhetorically. The situation was becoming more like a volcano, an explosion waiting to erupt, especially when Justin was concerned. Jamie remembered Justin kissing her mother before her eyes and it hurt her. It hurt her just to watch him be so spiteful towards her. Yet she had to be the bigger person here. If not for herself, then for Vita’s sake, she could shake off this affair and support her mother’s happiness.

Jamie stood to her feet and began for the door when the sound of Justin’s voice stopped her. She pressed her hear to her bedroom door and listened for anything she could hear. All that returned to her were the muffled murmurs of Vita and Justin speaking. She stepped away from the door, feeling her anger reign supreme again inside of her. Justin was the one being unfair! Why did he feel the need to come into their lives and wreck this much chaos? As Jamie stood by her bed, she wondered if Justin even had feelings.

Sighing, she retreated to her bathroom and prepared for her day. After she dressed, she left her room and cautiously walked down the steps. She looked in the kitchen and found it empty. Venturing to the porch, she found Vita sitting on the swing, her legs curled beneath her as she stared down the dirt road. Vita took a drag of her cigarette, blowing the smoke into the dusty air. Jamie saw only her car parked out front; Vita's truck was gone. 

“He took my truck to the shop.” Vita said as she looked over to Jamie. “He wanted to talk to you but I told him you were sleeping.”

Jamie nodded as she walked over to the longue chair sitting beside Vita. She watched Vita for a moment as she smoked her cigarette. Once upon a time, Vita was a vibrant young woman much like Jamie. She could see that timeless part of Vita, especially around Justin. She could see the youth that her mother once exuberated to the fullest in this small town.

Then she happened. Jamie was born while Vita was still very young and very much full of dreams. Her father and Vita married while Vita was still pregnant with her; the pregnancy lasted longer than the marriage did. Jamie still spoke to her father a few times a month but it was all done without Vita around. Much like Jamie felt with Justin right now, Vita felt betrayed by Jamie’s father.

“I love Justin, you know?” Vita began to say, holding the cigarette in her hand. A smile tugged at her lips as she continued. “He makes me feel so…alive.”

Jamie quietly nodded, listening to her mother. Vita took a pull from her cigarette and continued. “Justin is the best thing that has happened to me since your father walked out on us.”

“He didn’t walk out on us, Mom.” Jamie said defensively with a sigh.

“And what exactly do you call being in the delivery room for birth, only coming home when you were sick, and leaving before you were two years old?” Vita said angrily. “It’s not exactly a family full of love that Roger was giving to us.”

“Mom,” Jamie said with a sigh, “Dad still calls. He still cares about us. He asks about you all the time.”

“Probably as a joke.” Vita scuffed as she looked away.

Jamie licked her lips and thought of her words carefully as she spoke. “I approve of you and Justin.” All lies, Jamie thought to herself.

Vita looked at her child skeptically. “Jamie, don’t lie to me. You haven’t liked Justin since he’s been here.”

“I just don’t like the age.” Jamie said. “Justin-”

“Is a man and I am a woman.” Vita retorted with a shrug. “Age is only a number, Jamie.”

“You say that now but what if Justin wanted kids?” Jamie said as quickly as the thought passed her mind.

“Justin doesn’t want kids, Jamie.” Vita replied throwing the bud of her cigarette into the ashtray. She looked to Jamie and said, “We’ve already discussed it and he agreed, no children.”

“That doesn’t change the fact that he’s young, Mom.” Jamie countered as Vita held her head to the side. The women watched each other’s eyes for a moment, surveying the other’s thoughts silently. Jamie became squeamish under her mother’s gaze. She could recognize if it were the guilt making her feel this way or the fact this whole making peace with Vita was becoming a feeble argument.

When Vita chuckled a bit, Jamie became  anxious. As Vita began to speak, the house phone rang. Vita stood to her feet and didn’t say a word as she walked inside. A feeling of relief replaced the anxiousness Jamie felt as she sat on the porch. She was so sure that her mother was about to ask about her feelings for Justin. It’s a question she didn’t know if she was going to be able to answer. The answer was confusing to her. She liked having Justin around yet hated the things he did. She loved when he showed his attention to her but hated when he was indecisive about what and who he wanted. The confusion of it all boiled down to the fact that Jamie herself wasn’t trying to stop it, no matter how guilty she felt.

Vita returned to the door with the telephone in her hand, a look of utter disgust on her face. “It’s your father.”

Jamie took the phone from Vita as she walked back inside and pressed it to her ear. “Hi, Dad.”

“Hi, honey.” Roger said with a laugh. “I see your mother is marrying your older brother.”

Jamie laughed. “Dad, stop. Mom is happy.”

“Ah, that guy is just taking pity on Vita.” Roger said controlling his laugh. “She’s too old to still think I’m going to get jealous.”

“Dad,” Jamie sighed, “I don’t think she’s trying to make you jealous. She just wants to be happy is all.”

“Vita can find happiness with someone her own age.” Roger said sternly, “She’s just being rebellious and has been that way since you were born. Don’t get me wrong, Jamie, Vita is a good mother but, she needs to catch up on the years. She isn’t twenty years old anymore.”

“She’s trying, Dad.” Jamie said looking towards the door to see if Vita was nearby. She didn’t see anything that would indicate her mother’s presence. “Justin makes her happy, so can’t we all be happy for her?”

Roger sighed. “I guess so but that doesn’t mean I have to like it.”

Jamie smiled at her father’s remark. No matter what the issue was at hand, Roger knew how to make anyone laugh and move on from it, after discussing it of course. The two stayed on the phone for a while longer, talking about Jamie’s last year in school, her new job at the laboratory in the city, and Roger’s hopes she would join him in New York for Grad school. After the call ended, Jamie walked inside to place phone in it’s charging dock when she heard the roar of her mother’s truck rev into the yard.

Shit. Jamie thought as she began for the kitchen. The front porch door opened and closed abruptly as Justin and Jamie’s eyes met. Justin seemed like his usual self but his eyes told it all. They told Jamie that he had some much to say to her but couldn’t find the words. Jamie ignored him and walked into the kitchen to make food herself. Vita came down the steps dressed in her nurse smock and greeted Justin.

“Hi, honey.” Vita said happily. She looked into the kitchen, watching Jamie move about it as she made something to eat. Vita turned back to Justin and began talking to him about speaking with Jamie. Justin protested.

“She isn’t going to want to hear what I have to say, Vita.” Justin quietly said, looking from the corner his eye to see Jamie’s back hunch in a sigh. He knew her movements well enough to conclude she was in deed listening.

“Just talk to her, okay?” Vita said as she stroked the side of his face. “I’ll be back home tomorrow night. I have a double shift and then a training to do at the hospital.” Vita reached on the tips of her toes and kissed Justin’s face, the warm feel of the engagement ring feeling like a hot rod engraving the word ‘eternity’ to his cheek.

“Love you.” Vita said aloud to everyone as she walked out of the house and left down the road. Jamie took her plate and sat at the table, trying earnestly to ignore Justin but that wasn’t going to happen. Not while Justin had an opportunity to plead his case.

“Jamie, at least hear me out.” Justin pleaded as he took steps into the kitchen. Jamie continued to eat her food in silence, playing with the fork while he took a seat beside her. She watched him clasp his hands together and lean forward on the table, a habit she noticed he did whenever he was contemplating on a deep matter but this was past being deep.

“I know I should’ve told you I was going to propose but I didn’t know what to do.” Justin began to explain. Jamie continued to play with the food on her plate, not wanting to look at his face as he spoke to her. Justin began to reach for her hand but she pulled back, her head still down. She pushed her hair behind her ear with her free hand and continued to eat. “She found the ring that I was planning to give-”

“Cut the bullshit, Justin!” Jamie said angrily as she looked at him. “You can’t possibly think that I am going to believe you were going to give a ring to me as a gift knowing damn well you are with, Momma.”

Justin straightened his posture and said quietly, “I’m sorry.”

“Sorry?” Jamie said biting her lip as she shook her head back and forth. “You’re sorry?”

“Were you sorry before or after you decided it was okay to fuck me over and over again?” Jamie said while standing with her plate in hand. She’d lost her appetite.

“I know this isn’t what was suppose to happen but-“ Justin started to say but was cutoff by the loud crash the dish made with the sink.

“ ‘but what’, Justin?” Jamie angrily yelled, facing him. “You have no ounce of realization of what is going on here. You only care about getting what you want, fuck everyone else in between, right?”

“That isn’t true.” Justin said angrily. “You went along with this also, remember?”

“Excuse me!?” Jamie said bewildered. “I didn’t ask you to start this, Justin. I’m not the one waking up in the middle of the night, going to someone’s bedroom to have a good rock in the hay just to feel good.”

“You weren’t stopping me, now were you?” Justin retorted, scoffing at Jamie as she could only nod. She started walking out of the kitchen and up the stairs when it finally hit him. The realization that he’d made a huge mistake by speaking to her in that way. The two of them were wrong, he knew it but he didn’t want it to stop. He didn’t want it to end. Not like this.

“Jamie, wait!” Justin said as he followed her upstairs. He sprinted to her room before she could close the door and grabbed her arm.

“Get off of me!” Jamie said snatching her arm away. “You have no business touching me! Ever!”

“I’m sorry.” He said again. “I need you.”

“For what? You made it clear you don’t want me by kissing her in front of me and even moreso by proposing.”

“She found the ring I was giving to you and I couldn’t tell her no.”

“That still doesn’t make it right.” Jamie said angrily. Justin came towards her but was greeted with a slap to his chest. “I hate you!” She said angrily as Justin continued to take the blows that were coming.  Slowly the blows became cries as Jamie showed her weakness in front of him, crumbling to the floor as Justin crouched down beside her and held her. Jamie was becoming angry at herself for liking the comfort. She was angry that she was enjoying his arms comforting her.

“Why, Justin?” She said looking into his face. Justin looked down at her and couldn’t take her face like this. He liked to see her smile, to see her laughing but all he was bringing to her was pain.

“It’s over.” He said, rocking Jamie back and forth. “It’s over.”

Jamie blinked back her tears as she left Justin’s embrace and stood to her feet. “Just like that? You’re going to end us, with no remorse. You’re so selfish.”

“What do you want out of me?” Justin said, pushing himself up on the bed.

“I want...” Jamie stopped herself as she felt the tears coming on again. “I’m going to go.” She went about her room, grabbing her keys and purse.

“Jamie, I lo-“

“Don’t!” Jamie said looking Justin in the eyes. “Don’t you say-”

“I love you.” Justin said despite Jamie’s protest. “I do love you but I love her also.”

Jamie shook her head at him. “You are the most incredibly selfish asshole I have ever met. Go to hell, Justin.” She began walking out of the door briskly and down the steps with Justin close behind.

“Jamie, look, I’ll do anything you want me to.” He said as they walked outside towards her car. She got inside and closed the door, starting it up as Justin beat the window hoping for her attention. “Jamie, please, just tell me what you want.”

Jamie rolled down her window and looked at Justin. She took in his worrisome face and thought about it all. Her mother needed space as well as Jamie herself. They only way she was going to be able to do that was to leave it all behind. Leave the house and Justin all behind.

“I want you to tell mama, I love her and I’ll be back for my things.” Jamie said quietly as the tears stung her. She pulled the car in reverse and backed up before making her turn down the road. As she saw Justin’s frame become smaller and smaller in view, she knew her time in the nest was over and her wings were spreading to fly but much like a baby bird, her misguidance about where to fly might bring her a few flaps short to land safely without being harmed.