Was he serious? I had chanced everything with him. I'm trying with everything I have for him. Everything I could have for the last twenty four hours. We have only really known each other for a little while. We should be nowhere near an ‘I love you' kind of relationship.

I throw my hands up in the arm with frustration, "I thought I was all in this relationship. However I didn't realize that we were that far into it yet."

He is frustrated. "You're scared of someone actually caring about you. You're scared that this could actually be something you can't run from." He kept looking in the opposite direction.

"Justin, seriously look at me" he couldn't even look at me.

"I know you think this is all happening too fast and it may be... I know that but I can't be in another relationship where my feelings and my wants are not addressed."

"This... this thing you're doing right now is going to make me run. I want to be in this relationship. I don't know how else to tell you this. But I can't make up for anything anyone else has screwed up for in the past. I will barely be able to make up for my own screw ups. You can't put that pressure on me."

"I need someone that is there for me and just not there for themselves." He looks up at me with the pain in his eyes.

"Justin I will not use you. I know that is what you're leaning towards. I would never do something like that. I just don't want the world to know my personal relationship status until we know our relationship status. We can go to dinner every night if you want. I don't care about being seen in public, I just want to be refraining from putting a public statement out there saying ‘Hey this is my boyfriend...' then month later I'm the girl with the broken heart. So please if I squash the story for a couple months don't take it personally. You of all people should know this by now. This is how it works."

"I understand, I really do... I'm sorry." He hangs his head.

"Man, how can we go from bliss to complete frustration within minute's timeframe?"

"Welcome to my world."

            He continues to sits in that chair, maybe thinking some things through, maybe just doesn't know what to say. I know that I'm pretty stubborn but I think this was an issue on his end that he was trying to deal with. At the end of the day it had nothing to do with me. It was something he needed to work out for himself.

I get up and start to walk away from him. "I think I am going to go into the office for a couple hours. Give you some time to yourself."

"No." he says quickly. "Please don't go. Come with me somewhere." He takes my hand into his.

"Okay... where?"

"I can't tell you. I have to show you." His eyes light up.

            We get in the car and drive north. I had no idea where he was taking me. For all I knew he was taking me to leave me somewhere. We were about an hour outside of the city and I get a phone call from the office. Shit I hope there wasn't something important happening because I am not near a computer to help with anything that's needed.

"Emily Clarkson."

"Hey Em, its Tracey. I have a slight problem."

Shit. "What's wrong?"

"I just got a lead from the editor over at People Magazine. They have an exclusive interview with someone that works at Whole Foods claiming Justin Timberlake got married in the last couple days and they are running with the story. They also have photos of Justin getting gas in his car about an hour ago with a mystery brunette in the car... Please tell me there is no truth to this story and I can just crush it right now."

"Well I don't know, let me ask him." He looks over at me, cocking his head sideways and smiles.

"You are with him right now? Shut the fuck up!" I hear her say as I turn to Justin.

"Justin, did you get married and not tell me?" I ask.

He just chuckles... "I told you this morning you would get that phone call sometime today."

"Tracey, there is no truth to the story. He was making a point this morning with me, just squash it."

"And the brunette?" She questions.

"It's me... Squash it as well, please."

"I'm going to have to squash a lot of reports of the two of you for a while..."

"You know the drill, just state that we don't comment on his personal life and that if he was married there would be a marriage certificate."

"I knew you cared about him. Yay! I'm so happy for you!"

"I got to go now. Call me if you need anything else."

"Oh no, I will handle everything else I won't bother you again." The joy in her voice was funny to hear. She seemed almost happier than I was with my new situation.

            We pull into a gated area. I had no idea where I was, I had never been this far north. He gave his name to the Security and they opened the gate for him. This neighborhood was very quiet. There was no one on the streets and there were barely any houses. Very different from where he lived in L.A.

"Where are we?"

"Patience Emily, Patience."

            It's ok for him to say that, he wasn't the one that had no clue where they were and with someone who could very well be a mass murderer or something. We pull into a garage that has a view of the ocean through it. I had never seen an ocean view from the inside of a garage.

He gets out of the car and comes around to my side of the car. "Come with me." He reaches for my hand. "This is my beach house. There are only a handful of people that know I even own this house."

"This relationship may work out after all. I love the ocean."

"I always wanted a house right on the ocean but I could never find one that was secluded, until I found... this one." He leads me through the house, heading straight for the back deck.

            I look up to see a plaque that sits about the doorway leading to the deck, "Patience". So that's why kept saying patience. That must be what he calls this place. The view was breathtaking. There were four houses that sat along this stretch of the beach, about an acre away from each other. He really had the beach all to himself.

"I come here to think and get away. Anytime I have disappeared from the world, I always ended up here." He seems calm and content here. "I wrote my entire new album sitting right here for a month."

"Ohh, my first couple weeks on the job, I couldn't find you... you were here."

"Yes. I told my mother not to worry but she knew where to find me if there was something was wrong. I shut off my phone and hid from the world."

"I know you secret hiding place now." He was showing me a piece of him. This was good.

He snickers as if he got away with something. "Jessica didn't even know I had this house."

"How did she not know about a house you own?"

"When I wanted to get away from her, I couldn't go somewhere she knew about. She would find me."

"Wow, it was that bad of a relationship?"

"I'm not proud of the actions and the misleading I did with her, but she wouldn't accept the idea that I had moved on. I ended it so many times."

"I don't like secrets. Don't keep something like this from me." I give him the stern look, "If for some reason you are not happy, you have to tell me. No matter what it is."

"I would tell you anything you wanted to know."

            Truth and honesty is going to be our biggest failure in this relationship. He is used to hiding things. He has had to for his entire life but I wasn't okay with that. Maybe it was my nature but I had to be in the know of things. I was used to being informed of all the details.

We spent the rest of the day lounging at the ocean. I can't remember the last time I didn't have my blackberry in my hand, ready to handle the next issue that came up.