"I don't need you to lecture me, Rachel." Chris replied hotly, cutting off the woman's verbal attack on him.  "That's what my mother is for." He grumbled.  Ever since that damn "news report" had aired this morning, his phone had been ringing off the hook.  Magazines and newspapers wanted a statement.  Radio and TV shows wanted a statement.  And now Rachel wanted a statement.  He wasn't sure what had possessed him to answer her call, but he had.  And he regretted it.  He was now stuck, sitting on the couch while she proceeded to yell at him long distance.

"You're right." She agreed, trying to rein in her anger.  "I just..." she trailed off.  "I'm disappointed." She confessed.  "I never thought you would do something like this."

Chris groaned as he put his head back against the cushions.  She was pulling out the guilt card, but he had nothing to feel guilty about!  "Rachel," he sighed.  "You, of all people, should know by now that the story that gets reported isn't always the truth."

There was silence on the line for a moment.  "So she's not married?" She asked.  Chris grimaced, though she couldn't see his face.  "Damn it, Chris!" She swore, taking his silence for the answer that it was.  "How could you...I can't believe I helped you try to win over a married woman!" She exclaimed. 

"You don't understand." Chris countered.

"Then help me understand." She pressured.  "Help me understand why I helped you break up a marriage just because you couldn't stop thinking about this girl and just wanted to get into her pants!"

"I didn't know she was married when we first met." He defended.

"But you do now." She stated.

"Yes." He agreed.

"Then why?  Why would you continue seeing her, knowing that she's married?" Rachel questioned.

"I don't have to explain myself to you, Rachel." Chris stated.

"The hell you don't!" She replied.  "You drug me into this and I--"

"I didn't drag you into anything!" Chris shot back angrily, his temper flaring.  "It was you and your nosey ass that just had to burrow in to my life--pry into my affairs--and--"

"Huh, affairs." She snorted, jabbing at his use of that particular word.  "Nice choice of words there, popstar."

"You know what?" Chris shouted.  "I didn't ask you for help!  I didn't ask you to put your nose into my business but you did.  Like you always do."

"What is that supposed to mean?" She asked.

"It means exactly what it means." He replied.  "You can't keep your nose to yourself.  You have to have your ass in everyone's business and you're not happy unless you're messing around with people's hearts and emotions--causing trouble and stirring up what doesn't need to be stirred up!  You're lucky things worked out with Justin and Aubrey."  She was silent but Chris knew she was fuming on the other end of the line. "I honestly don't know why JC married you." He continued.  "Or why he would want to have a child with you." Rachel gasped in offence but he didn't stop.  "You're a crazy, nosey, stubborn, pain in the ass woman and I--" He was cut off mid-rant as she suddenly hung up on him.  "Gah!" He growled in frustration as he tossed his phone to the other end of the couch.  He closed his eyes and scrubbed his hands over his face then jammed his fingers into his hair.  Trying to gain control of his anger he stood and began to pace in front of the couch.

It wasn't Rachel's fault that he had fallen in love with Kristen.  Yes, she had given him the push he needed when he needed it--had given him the idea to surprise her at work--but truth be told he was already head over heels for Kristen at that point and it wouldn't have taken long for him to break down and seek her out on his own.  And it certainly wasn't Rachel's fault that their relationship had been leaked to the media.  He trusted each of the guys implicitly and knew it hadn't been any of them or their significant others who had ratted them out.  He had known that wind of his involvement with Kristen was eventually going to end up in the news--it was one of the downfalls of being who he was--but what he hadn't counted on was Kristen's current marital status being brought up as well.

Or that everything was going to be leaked so soon.

Walking over to the couch, Chris grabbed his phone and called the person he should have been talking to.

"Hey, this is Kris.  Leave a message."

Chris growled.  Ending the call he continued pacing.

He was angry and frustrated and completely overwhelmed over this whole thing.  And he didn't want to admit how much the fact that Kristen hadn't answered scared him.  He wasn't at the level of fame and popularity that Justin or JC had been and were and it had been a long time since the media had been so focused on his personal life.  Even ten years ago when N SYNC had been in their hey-day he was able to fly under the radar for the most part and go unnoticed--a situation that had followed him into "life after N SYNC"--but not anymore.  This story had caused ripples in his life and in the media world in general and he was afraid that it was going to scare Kristen off.  They hadn't had a need to discuss the fact that their relationship could cause heads to turn around the world--and now they couldn't escape that fact.  Would she understand?  Was she upset?  Would this make her rethink her decision to be with him?  Chris growled in frustration again as he pushed his free hand through his hair. 

With a heavy sigh Chris looked down at his phone in his hand.  Now that he had calmed down a bit he felt bad about the things he'd said to Rachel.  Hitting a few buttons he called her, pressed the phone to his ear, and waited--though he knew she wasn't going to pick up.  When his call was kicked over to voicemail he sunk down onto the couch.

"Rachel, listen.  I'm sorry.  I just...look, I'm upset over this whole situation." He said, continuing on with his voicemail message apology to Rachel.  "It just kind of...blew up in my face this morning and I took it out on you.  I'm sorry.  You are stubborn and nosey but those are two of the things I love about you and they're what make you, you.  JC is a very lucky man to have you in his life.  I know how much he loves you.  We all love you and I...I'm sorry."  He paused, wondering what else to add but couldn't think of anything else and so he ended the call with a promise that he would call her back later.  He needed to apologize to her for real, to actually say those things to her and make sure she understood that he didn't mean them and had just been speaking out of anger.  He felt terrible about what he'd said and he knew JC was going to be breathing down his neck until he apologized and made things right. 

When did things get so damn complicated?  Chris wondered as he set the phone down next to him.  He leaned over, his arms resting on his knees as he hung his head.  He thought back to when he had first met Joey and JC and then had been introduced to Justin and Lance.  He thought things had been hard when they were touring and making music literally 24/7 but once they all started adding spouses and significant others into the mix things suddenly became a hell of a lot more complicated.  Guys were guys and fights between them--when they did break out--were quickly gotten over with a few punches and a wrestling match or two on the floor.  Before too long someone would crack a joke and they'd all be laughing again, completely forgetting what it was they had been fighting about seconds before.   

Girls were a completely different breed of animal however, and arguments and hurt feelings weren't easily forgotten--or forgiven.  Add on the additional pressure of having to appease whichever one of the guys she was with for having upset "his girl" and the situation became instantly more complicated and intense.  Now, instead of apologizing to just one person, you had to apologize to two.  Twice the number of people mad at you and twice the humiliation when you had to say you were sorry.    

"Girls make everything complicated." Chris muttered aloud.  And speaking of girls...he sat up and reached for his phone.  Hitting a few buttons he dialed Kristen's number again and waited, praying she would answer this time.

There was a lot they needed to talk about...   

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Kristen sat in her jeep.  Her eyes--which were covered by a pair of dark sunglasses--stared at the front entrance of the hospital.  She sunk lower down in her seat, hoping nobody could see her.  She wasn't normally one that shied away from difficult situation, but she honestly had no idea how to handle this particular situation.  How the hell did they find out where I work so quickly?  She wondered as she surveyed the group of people milling around outside the entrance. 

 The news report linking her to Chris and putting her marital status out in the open for everyone to gossip and speculate about had been released an hour ago.  Kristen had stared dumbly at her television--her toothbrush dangling from her mouth--as pictures, that had been taken of her and Chris around town the last couple weeks, were broadcast.  She hadn't seen any photographers around when she had been out with Chris and, while part of her was impressed that they had managed to get such good photos unbeknownst to her, she felt her anger flare as one photo in particular was flashed on the screen.  That one picture gave away who the "source" was that had fed the story to the media and Kristen instantly saw red.  However, that was the least of her worries right now.  Right now, she had to figure out a way to get past the twelve guys with cameras strapped around their necks that were blocking her way to work.  They were going to corner her, ask questions, and she had no idea what to say.  She had no idea what she was supposed to say.

Reaching for her purse, Kristen pulled out her phone-surprised to see she had two missed calls.  When did it...

"Kris?" He asked as he answered her call. 

"I never heard my phone ring." She apologized.  "I'm sorry."

Chris breathed what sounded like a sigh of relief at hearing her voice.  "Are you okay?" He asked. 

"They found out where I work." She replied.

"What?" Chris questioned.

"There are twelve guys with cameras currently standing outside the main entrance of the hospital." She told him.  "We don't currently have any celebrity patients so I can only assume they're here for me." 

"Damn it!" He sighed heavily.  "I'm sorry." He apologized.

"Why are you apologizing?" Kristen asked. 

"Because, if I wasn't who I was this wouldn't be happening." He replied as if the answer should have been obvious to her. "If I were just a regular guy nobody would give a flying flip who I was dating, or the fact that it can be seen as you having an affair and me breaking up your marriage.  I'm sorry.  I don't know--"

"This isn't your fault, Chris." She insisted, cutting him off.

"It's not?" He questioned.

"No." She shook her head.

"Then whose fault is it?" Chris asked.

"You don't want to know." Kristen muttered under her breath as she rolled her eyes--thinking back on the photo she'd seen earlier.  She clenched her jaw as her anger returned.

"What was that?" He asked.

"Nothing." She shook her head, taking a deep breath--hoping to calm her anger.  "How do I get past them?" She asked.

"Uhm...is there a back door?" He asked.

"Not one that's easily accessible." She replied.  "What do I do?" She asked.  "I've never...I've never dated a celebrity before.  I don't know what to do.  I don't know what the proper way to act in this situation is.  What am I supposed to do?  What am I supposed to say?  Help me out here." She plead.

"There's nothing you're supposed to do or say." Chris answered.  "No matter what you do, they're going to take what you said or didn't say and what you did or didn't do and somehow twist it around so they can make a boring story into an exciting one for the ten o'clock news."

"I don't want to do anything that's going to hurt you." She told him.

There was silence between them for a moment then Chris chuckled.  "You're amazing." He told her.

"What?" Kristen asked, confused his laughter and comment.

"Your life and the fact that you're in a relationship with me, along with your current marital status, just became public knowledge and you're worried about doing or saying something that's going to hurt me?" He questioned.  "Are you for real?"

"My life has been nothing but one giant shit storm until I ran into you, Chris." She stated.  "Twelve guys with cameras and a report on the morning gossip show are nothing compared to what I've been through the last six months.  I'm just sorry that my messed up life is now causing you bad press.  You haven't ever done anything to garner bad publicity like this until now.  Until you met me.  You're trying to start up your new band and bad publicity isn't going to help anything.  I just--"

"Stop." He said, cutting her off.  "You can't take it back." He stated firmly. 

Kristen pulled back slightly and raised one brow in confusion until it clicked as to what he was referring to.  "I'm not taking anything back." She assured him.  "I love you.  I just wish my life wasn't so messed up and that it wasn't affecting you like this."

"Would you stop?" He asked.  "I don't give a shit what people say about me!  I've been the brunt of people's jokes and ridicule since before I can remember.  You tend to grow a pretty thick skin when you grow up poor and dealt with everything I had to deal with.  Add on becoming part of one of the biggest pop groups in history and I've seen and heard it all--and then some.  You should have heard some of the rumors that went around about me and the guys back in the day."

"But this isn't a rumor, Chris." She reminded him.  "This one is true."

"I know." He answered. 

"So, what do we do about it?" She asked.

"I don't know." He replied.  "I wish I knew who their ‘source' was." He murmured.  "I don't know who else knows about you and I, besides the guys, and none of them knew about your...situation.  I don't know--"

"I do." She cut him off.

"You know who the ‘source' is?" He questioned.

"Yeah." She nodded, though he couldn't see her. 

"Who is it?"

"Kevin." She answered.  Again there was silence on the line but Kristen could almost feel the heat from Chris' anger through the phone. 

"Are you...are you sure?" He asked-the clipped tone of his words giving away the fact that he was trying to hold back his anger.  "What makes you think--"

"Did you see the pictures they had of us?" She questioned.

"Briefly." He answered.

"There were a couple of us at the mall last weekend but then there was another one of us kissing." Kristen told him.  "In the parking lot outside my apartment building."  She waited for him to put the pieces together. 

"He took a picture of us while he was waiting for you last week?" He asked.

"That's my guess." Kristen replied, nodding.  "It's the only explanation that fits."  She sighed.  "I don't understand why he's doing this!" She exclaimed, hitting her hand against the steering wheel and then combing her fingers through her hair as she rested her elbow against the window of the Jeep.  She felt angry tears form but held them back.  She didn't want to cry right now, damn it!  "Why won't he just leave me alone?" She questioned, though she knew Chris didn't have the answer anymore than she did.

"Because he's miserable." He stated.  "And misery loves company."  Kristen's brow furrowed slightly as he continued.  "He's seen firsthand now, that you don't need him--that you've moved on.  Sooner or later everything he's done is going to catch up to him and my guess is, it's starting to.  If he's any kind of man he knows he had a good thing going with you and he fucked it up and he can't stand the thought of you being happy without him."  Kristen was quiet as she digested what he had just told her.  His theory made sense and explained all the shit Kevin was putting her through. "I know," Chris continued, his voice dropping slightly.  "If I ever did anything to lose you it would kill me to see you with someone else and I would do whatever I could to get you back."

Kristen pulled her bottom lip between her teeth, her heart swelling at his admission.  "Things could get pretty ugly." She said.

"I know." Chris stated.

"Are you sure--"

"I meant what I said the other night." He replied, cutting her off.  "I'm willing to risk just about anything for you."

Tears again stung her eyes.  She blinked rapidly, trying to stop them from falling.  She sniffled as she laid her head back against her seat and swallowed.  Why does he love me?  She questioned.  Why does he want to still be with me?  "This could turn into a pretty big ‘anything.'" She stated, her voice wavering slightly.

"Bring it on." He stated firmly making Kristen smile.  She wished with everything in her that he were sitting there with her right now.  She desperately wanted and needed him to hold her in his arms, to kiss her, and tell her that everything was going to be okay.  "Everything will be okay." He said as if he had read her thoughts.  "I've spent the last...fifteen years dealing with the press.  We'll get through this.  Somehow...we'll get through this.  Together.  Okay?" He asked.

"Okay." She nodded as she wiped away the tears that had escaped as he'd been talking.  Her phone vibrated, indicating the receipt of an incoming message.  "Hold on." She told him as she pulled the phone away from her ear and opened the text. 

You're late... :)

She quickly typed out a response to Amie, letting the other girl know she was in the parking lot and about to walk in, then put the phone back to her ear.  "Enough hanging out in my car." She told Chris.  "I gotta...go, try and get past these guys.  I'm late for work."

"Just don't say anything to them." He advised.  "And don't listen to anything they say to you." He continued as she got out of the Jeep, grabbed her purse and locked the car.  "They're going to try and bait you--to get some kind of reaction from you.  Don't listen to anything they say.  I'll come over tonight and we can talk about whether or not we should release a statement or something, okay?"  He asked.

"Okay." Kristen nodded as she stood beside her car.

"Do you want me to stay on the phone with you while you walk in?" He asked.

"If I say yes, will you think I'm a wimp?" She asked with a nervous chuckle.  Now that she was about to walk through the photographers she was terrified. 

"Absolutely not." He replied.  "I just wish I was there to hold your hand and pull you through to the other side." He told her.

"I don't think you being here would be such a great idea right about now." She teased as she began walking hesitantly towards the hospital.

"Would you quit worrying about me?" He asked with a chuckle.  "I'm a big boy.  I can handle myself.  I've been put through the ringer a time or two.  It's you I'm worried about.  How close are you?" He asked.

"Almost there." She replied, her stomach doing summersaults.  "I can't breathe." She admitted.    

"Just hold your head up and walk in there like you own the place." He told her.  "Don't let them get to you and you'll be fine."

"Here we go." She warned him under her breath. 

"There she is!" Someone called out and all eyes turned on her.  Flashes started going off and the group surged towards her.  Kristen gritted her teeth and pushed through them as they called out their questions and jostled to get close to her.

"Kristen, is it true you're married?"

"How did you and Chris meet?"

"When did this all start?"

"Care to comment on the photos that have been released of you and Chris kissing?"

"Is this just an April Fool's joke?"

Kristen had never really thought about what a panic attack would feel like, but she was pretty sure she was having one right now.  Difficulty breathing, heart palpitations, chest pain, dizziness, trembling, overwhelming nervousness and anxiety, the urge to throw up...

"You're doing great." Chris' voice soothed and she focused her attention on him as she took the final steps through the front doors.  She stopped once the automatic doors closed behind her--shutting the photographers out.  She breathed a sigh of relief-her heart rate slowing down--until she noticed that every eye in the waiting room was watching her.  Her chest tightened again and she felt like she was choking.  "What's going on?" Chris asked, bringing her attention back to him and away from the panic that had set in. 

"Everyone's looking at me." She whispered into the phone as she straightened her shoulders and began walking towards her office. She kept her eyes looking straight ahead--making eye contact with nobody.

"That's because you're gorgeous." He stated simply. 

"That's not the reason." She replied with a roll of her eyes. 

"It's the reason I'm always looking at you." He told her.  "So why isn't that the reason everyone else is looking at you?"

"Because." She laughed as she turned a corner and entered the administration part of the hospital where her office was located. 

"‘Because' isn't an answer." Chris stated.   

"Yes it is." Kristen argued as she walked down the hall past Michael and Amie's offices. 

"No, it's not." He insisted.

"Bite me." She sassed with another roll of her eyes as she entered her office.  She set her purse down on her desk as she collapsed onto her chair.

"Glady." He replied.  "And I will.  When I come over tonight.  If you'll tell me where and how hard you'd like me to."

Kristen laughed for a moment, but her mood soon dampened slightly and she sighed.  "Thank you." She told him.  "I don't know if I would have been able to get through that without you."

"You wouldn't have had to go through it at all if I hadn't--"

"Stop." She cut him off.  "No more regrets and no more apologizing--from either of us." She stated.  "What's done is done and neither of us can, or is going to, take anything back, remember?"

"Yes, ma'am." He replied. 

"We just...have to come up with a plan of attack." She continued.  "Kind of like a giant game of Battleship." She grinned, liking the analogy she'd just come up with.

"We'll sink their battleship." Chris affirmed.

"Exactly."  Kristen nodded.

"And we'll come up with our battle plan tonight!" He said, sounding like he was really getting into the idea.

"Perfect." She smiled.

"What time do you get off?" He asked.

"I should be home about six." She told him.

"Pizza or Chinese?" He questioned.

"Hmmm..." she hummed as she chewed on her bottom lip, trying to decide.  "Pizza." She finally chose. 

"Then I will see you at six, with pizza in hand, to begin planning our attack."