It was a sharp contrast to the sounds that had filled the room he was in a short time ago.  Chris sat, leaning back against the headboard--chewing on his right thumbnail.  It was a bad habit of his--something he'd done for as long as he could remember.  Most of the time he didn't realize he was even doing it.  It helped him think, or helped take his mind off what was bothering him.  Problem was he couldn't decide what he wanted to do right now. 

Think? 

Or forget?

His eyes ran over Kristen's sleeping form as several different thoughts and emotions battled for supremacy in his head and heart.  Thinking it is.  Chris thought with a heavy sigh. 

She had innocently kissed his cheek as they had stood outside her apartment earlier and what had followed had been one of the hottest hookups he'd ever had.  He cringed when his mind used that word to describe what had just happened.  Hookup?  He had a hard time believing that was all this had been.

When his lips had touched hers for the first time, Chris had known immediately that he was in trouble.  Getting this girl off his mind and out of his system like he had hoped, was going to take a lot more than he had naively thought it would.  Any other girl and he would be able to get up and walk out right now without looking back.  But Kristen...Kristen was different. 

He could feel it.

Chris blew out a breath as he laid his head back against the wall.  He scrubbed his hands over his face.  What have you gotten yourself into?  He thought.  Kristen shifted beside him on the bed and he looked down at her.  Her full, perfect lips--those lips that had tasted just as sweet as he had thought they would taste, and felt like heaven between his own--parted slightly, a soft sigh escaping her.  He had to forcefully restrain himself from reaching over and touching her.  All he wanted to do was caress her cheek--to feel her skin against his and convince himself that she was real; that what had just happened was real. Instead he folded his arms tightly across his chest.

What is it about you?  He silently asked her as he sat, watching her sleep.  Why are you so special?  He'd met girls in the past that he had things in common with--girls he had a good time with and enjoyed kissing-but none of them had thrown him for a loop like she had.  What made her so special?  Why was he suddenly finding himself in a tangle of confusing thoughts and emotions?  What gave her the power to affect him like this?

Finally, feeling overwhelmed and not really wanting to examine his feelings any closer at the moment, Chris turned.  Being careful to move the bed as little as possible he stood.  He didn't want to wake Kristen.  He didn't want to face her until he could figure out what he was thinking about all of this.  Picking up his discarded clothes from her floor he dressed as quickly and quietly as possible.  Slipping on his shoes he looked at Kristen for a moment then turned and left the room.  Quietly opening and closing her apartment door--making sure to lock it as he left--Chris stood for a moment outside, taking a few deep breaths of the chilly night air.  Then, squaring his shoulders he made his way down the stairs and towards his truck.  As he got in and slid behind the wheel of the Escalade his eyes looked up at her window.  After a few more silent moments, Chris started the SUV, threw it into reverse, and then left her apartment complex.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Kristen sat, absent-mindedly running her finger around the rim of her glass Wednesday morning--only half listening to Kyle and Mark as they droned on about the celebrity baseball game they were having so much success in putting together.  She hadn't been able to focus on anything that had been said all morning.  Hell, all week!  Her mind was a swirl of confusing thoughts and emotions-the most prominent at the moment being guilt.  She leaned forward, her elbow leaning on the table while she rested her cheek in her hand. 

She was no better than Kevin and that fact stung and left a bitter taste in her mouth.  Yes, they were separated but legally she was still married and Saturday night she'd done what she'd gotten so upset at him for doing. 

She'd slept with someone who wasn't her husband.

The guilt had been such that Kristen hadn't been able to work up the courage to go to church Sunday morning.  Fearing that she would be struck down as soon as she stepped through the door for being a hypocrite and breaking the sixth commandment, she had stayed home instead--curled up on the couch, the scene from the previous night repeating itself over and over in her head.

They stumbled through the door and Kristen turned, bringing Chris in front of her, as she reached behind blindly to shut and lock her front door.  Chris still had his hands on her face, his thumbs stroking her cheeks as his lips moved determinedly against her own.  As she closed the door he pressed her back against it--using it as leverage to deepen the already intense kiss they were sharing.  Kristen finally tore her lips away from his, desperately sucking in the oxygen her lungs were screaming for, but he kept right on going.  Her head fell back against the door and her fingers moved to sink into his dark hair as he lowered his own hands from her face-his lips burning a trail along her jaw and down her neck.  His hands came to rest on her waist her heart, which was already beating out a steady and frantic beat, sped up a bit as he pulled her roughly against him.  She couldn't hold back the moan that escaped as his delicious mouth moved back up to her ear, his lips beginning to toy with the sensitive flesh there.  She shivered.

All evening she'd wanted to pinch herself, to see if this was really happening.  It had been so long since a man had shown any sort of interest in her that she wasn't really sure what to do with that interest.  All of the flirting, all of the looks and all of the feelings swirling inside of her had led her to take a chance and kiss his cheek--never guessing in a million years that he would react the way he had.  His lips captured hers once again and Kristen tightened her arms around his neck, wanting to be as close as possible to him. 

Chris pulled back suddenly and looked at her.  His brown eyes met hers as they both struggled for breath.  She could see his desire for her burning in his incredible eyes and she felt goose bumps rush over her.  Slowly, she removed her arms from around his neck--her fingers slipping out of his hair--and lowered them to her sides.  Their eyes stayed locked on each other.  No words were spoken but they both heard the silent question hanging in the air between them loud and clear.  She had a choice to make and it was totally up to her whether or not this was going to happen tonight. 

Although, she was instantly bombarded with a million thoughts and voices as to why they shouldn't, Kristen wanted to push them all away and throw caution to the wind.  Every female hormone she possessed was screaming at her to do this.  It had been so long, she couldn't remember the last time she had done this.  Her and Kevin's relationship had been anything but intimate for longer than she cared to think about and suddenly here she was, standing in her apartment with an insanely attractive and sexy man who wanted to be with her and everything inside was screaming for release. 

Her knees suddenly felt a bit unsteady as Chris continued to stand there looking at her.  Finally, pushing all of the thoughts and voices in her head away Kristen took a step around Chris and began walking away from him and farther into her apartment.  Chris turned to look at her, watching her curiously and Kristen fought to keep a straight face-delighted over the fact that she had him so intrigued and captivated.  With slow and measured precision, Kristen crossed her arms in front of her, grabbed the hem of her tank top and lifted the material up and over her head.  His dark eyes darkened even more and Kristen's stomach flipped.  She let the tank top fall to the floor at her feet then took a step backwards.  Trying her best to be as seductive as she could Kristen lifted her hand and crooked a finger at him, beckoning him towards her. 

Kristen shifted in her seat and picked up her pen.  She began idly doodling in her notebook to put on the appearance that she was listening and taking notes.  Why did he leave?  The question had been rolling around in her head since waking up to discover she was alone.  A disconcerting feeling when she knew she had gone to bed with someone.  To her the night had been incredible, Chris had been amazing and she'd fallen asleep with the look of pleasure and absolute satisfaction on his face fresh on her mind.

She had gone over every detail, searching for the fatal flaw.  The reason that would have made him disappear like he had--leaving her to wonder if it had all just been a dream.  The only answer she had been able to come up with was that Kevin had been right.  She was boring.  Why had she thought she held any power over him at all?  What had made her assume that the spark in his eyes was more than just temporary lust?  What had made her think that maybe their flirting and open conversation with each other that night had been anything more than just his ploy to get her into bed as quickly as possible?  What had made her believe he was more than just some spoiled celebrity used to getting his way?  Kristen bit her bottom lip to hide its trembling and closed her eyes against the tears that were starting to form but one slipped from beneath her lashes.  She angrily wiped it away, hoping no one had seen it.  She refused to cry over him.  He had used her and proven he wasn't worth it.  She wasn't going to waste her tears on one more man.  She was done.  No more.  He was the last one.     

"Kristen and Amie?"

Kristen looked up in surprise as Michelle called on the two girls.  She sniffed and looked around the conference room. 

"How are the plans going for the benefit concert?" Michelle asked.

"Kristen and I have spent the last couple weeks making a lot of phone calls." Amie said.  "We've been able to get a commitment from a few vendors and we're in talks with a couple different arenas to see which one will work the best."

"Which musicians have signed on so far?" Kyle asked.

Kristen and Amie looked at each other then at everyone else who were all looking at them expectantly--except Kyle who just sat there looking smug, somehow knowing that he and Mark were several steps farther than the girls were in their event plans. 

"Well..." Amie hesitated.  She cleared her throat.  "None." She answered honestly.  "But," she continued quickly.  "Kristen has recently had a few...conversations," she looked at Kristen and Kristen felt her cheeks blush at the knowing look and smile that her friend gave her, "with the one and only Chris Kirkpatrick and I'm sure--"

"You really think anyone's going to pay to see his ass up on stage?" Kyle cut in.  "A guy who sang backup for a boyband?  What's he going to do up there?  People aren't going to want to see and hear one-fifth of a song or dance."

"For your information," Kristen stated, feeling her defenses rise.  Despite her earlier despairing thoughts about the man, she couldn't just sit there while he was being slandered.  "He's actually working on putting together a new group."

"Is he?" Kyle asked, clearly not impressed.

"Yes." Kristen nodded, glaring at the man.  What exactly was his deal about this whole thing?  Why was he so set against Chris being a part of this event?  "And I got him to agree on Saturday to be a part of the concert."

"Really?" Kyle asked, one brow rising as he cocked his head to the side and looked at her-his arms crossed over his chest.

"Really?" Amie echoed, turning to look at her with a shocked expression on her face.  Kristen met her friend's eyes and nodded slightly, wondering what on earth had possessed her to lie like that.  "Why didn't you..." she trailed off.  "Nevermind.  That's great!  So, we've got one act signed up." Amie smiled as she turned back to the room.  "The first one's always the hardest, but now that we've got Chris others will hear about it and want to sign up as well." Amie smiled confidently. 

"Very good." Michelle nodded.  "Let's move on..."

Again Kristen tuned out, her eyes falling to her notebook again as her heart began skipping nervously in her chest. 

"You little sneak." Amie whispered quietly as she leaned over towards her.  Kristen looked over at the girl.  "Why didn't you tell me that you got Chris to agree to do this?" She asked with an excited smile. 

"Because I haven't." Kristen admitted. 

Amie looked at her in confusion.  "B-but you just said..." She trailed off as the meeting finally ended and everyone stood to leave the room.  Kristen, however, stayed sitting and Amie continued to look at her, patiently waiting for an explanation. 

Kristen sighed.  "I couldn't handle Kyle's badgering anymore." She said.  "I..." she shook her head.  "I spoke without thinking.  I just wanted to shut him up." 

Amie frowned as she sat back in her chair.  Kristen could see the wheels turning in the girl's head and stayed quiet--waiting.  "Well." Amie finally said, gathering up her things as she stood.  "It's a good thing you and he have become so close." She winked at Kristen.  "Keep using that charm of yours on him and he'll agree to do this sooner or later, right?" She asked. 

"R-right." Kristen agreed as she looked down at the table once more, unable to meet her friend's gaze.  She had told Amie about what had happened after she and Chris had left the bar Saturday night, but she hadn't told her that he had snuck out sometime during the night while she had been sleeping and that she hadn't heard from him since.  Amie left the room and Kristen leaned her elbows on the table and put her head into her hands.  You've really stepped in it this time, Kristen, haven't you?  She berated herself.  You and you're big mouth.  She rolled her eyes as she let out a heavy sigh, gathered her notebook and stood.  Just had to try and upstage Kyle, didn't you.  Well now what?  She asked herself.  Now what?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Earth to Chris."

Chris jerked back in his chair as an empty water bottle suddenly came sailing his way.  "Ow!" He exclaimed as the plastic made a direct hit and connected with his temple.  "What the hell was that for?" He asked, turning to look at Mike.

The other man laughed as he tipped back in his chair.  "We've been sitting here for the last hour and I've been trying to talk to you for the last twenty minutes, but all I get is this blank stare from you." Mike explained.  "What's wrong?"  He asked.  "If you don't like the song, all you have to do is say so."

"No, it's not...it's not the song." Chris shook his head.  He sighed as he leaned forward, placing his elbows up on the edge of the soundboard in his home studio and scrubbed his hands over his face. 

"What's going on?" Mike asked.

Chris shook his head.  "Nothing." He said, pasting a smile on his face--hoping to convince the other guy that he was being truthful.  He had no desire to air all his thoughts right now to anyone.  "Sorry.  I'm focused now.  Play it again." 

Mike looked at him for a moment then finally turned and hit a few buttons, the opening measures of the new song they had been working on coming through the speakers of the recording equipment in the room.  Chris forced himself to work, though his mind continued to wander.

His eyes widened slightly as he watched her reach for the hem of her tank top and pull the shirt over her head.  His mouth suddenly went dry as she let the material fall to the floor, took a step backwards and beckoned him with a finger.  He was powerless to deny her and quickly closed the space between them--his arms wrapping around her waist as he pulled her against him and captured her mouth once more with his.  His hands ran over her smooth, warm skin as she continued walking backwards, leading him back to what he assumed was her bedroom, eliciting another moan from her.  Chris couldn't help the smug smile that came at hearing her sounds of pleasure because of his touch.  He had been with numerous women in the past--some more recent than most--but he suddenly couldn't remember any of them as Kristen's hands ran down his chest and slipped beneath his T-shirt.  He pulled back, looking at her as his chest rose and fell sharply.  She glanced up at him through her lashes and Chris all but groaned as she smiled coyly at him then pulled her bottom lip between her teeth as she moved her hands up his chest--the material of his shirt moving upwards as well.  She soon rid him of the material then stood looking at him, waiting for his next move. 

Chris reached a hand up-his finger running over her lips and chin.  Kristen tipped her head back slightly as his finger continued running down her throat and chest, finally coming to rest at the junction of her bra.  Her chest rose and fell sharply and he found his eyes lowering to where his finger lay against her skin.  She was incredible!  Beautiful!  Her head came forward again, her eyes meeting his as he leaned towards her.  Their lips met in another heated exchange--the rest of their clothes soon joining their shirts on the floor.  They fell into bed in a tangle of arms and legs and Chris soon found out they had something else in common.  She was as passionate and energetic in bed as he was.  In that regard, they were a match made in heaven in his opinion.  Not once, but twice, he made her cry out and she him until they had both collapsed back against the mattress, panting for breath.

Chris shifted uncomfortably in his chair as Mike suddenly cleared his throat beside him.  He glanced over at the other man, relieved to see that his friend hadn't seemed to catch on to Chris's sudden state of...arousal, courtesy of the memories he had been indulging in. 

He wanted to see her again.  And it wasn't just because of the incredible sex they had shared.  He hadn't been able to stop thinking about her.  Her smile, her laugh, her beautiful brown eyes, and the way she smelled...he wanted to find out what else they may have in common.  He wanted to find out what had put the sadness and utter hopelessness in her eyes that first day they had met.  He wanted to know why she lived alone-why she hadn't been snatched up before now.  She was smart, funny, and incredibly sexy.  She was every guy's dream--a beautiful and educated woman who had a good head on her shoulders, enjoyed letting loose and having a good time, liked dogs, music and was into sports. 

Regardless of the fact that she cheers for Chicago. 

Chris couldn't help chuckling to himself as that thought crossed his mind-recalling the passionate way she had defended her beloved teams.  He couldn't wait for football season to start.  He could only imagine what watching a Steelers/Bears game with her would be like then he caught himself.  Football season?  He questioned.  That's...six months away!  Six months was a hell of a long time.  Anything could happen in six months and suddenly the thoughts and questions that had chased him away from Kristen's early Sunday morning came back with a vengeance.  Why was he so infatuated with the girl?  Why, after all this time of being alone and committing himself to the life of a happy bachelor, was he beginning to question that life and wonder if there was something he had been missing out on.  Something he had overlooked and brushed aside in his arrogance and selfishness.   His ears suddenly tuned in to the words of the song Mike was working on and he wondered if someone other there was trying to tell him something. 

I've got this problem in my head
I can't remember what was said
I probably made a fool of myself

Well I had too many beverages
To overcome the shakes I had
I get so nervous when there's no else

Around but me and you
The space on what to do
I've got to find the answers
To the questions that I'm just to scared to ask

Ok, here goes
Will you be mine?

If you say that you will
Every footstep that I feel
Will be falling in a line
Running straight to you
If you're real
Would you feel the way I feel?
Then we'll be fine.

Again, Chris shifted uncomfortably in his seat--this time because the words of the song were hitting a little too close to home at the moment; voicing thoughts he was too scared to at the moment.

I need some clarity,
Someone to comfort me.
When the sum of one and one is three.

If you say that you will
Every footstep that I feel
Will be falling in a line
Running straight to you.
If you're real
Would you feel the way I feel?
Then we'll be fine.

If you're real
Would you feel the way I do?

Who was he to think Kristen would want to have anything to do with him--an out of work musician?  He was a playboy.  He wasn't the type to settle down in a relationship.  It had been more than a decade since his last serious relationship.  He wasn't sure he even knew what the first step was to start one.  It's certainly not sleeping with the girl your interested in before you've even had a real date with her and then sneaking off in the middle of the night because you're too afraid to face her in the morning.  He rolled his eyes as his conscience yelled at him.  What kind of man did that? 

"What kind of man are you?"  Kristen's question from Saturday night came back to taunt him. 

The kind of man you're better off without.  He answered. 

However, regardless of the fact that he believed she was better off without him, Chris pulled his cell phone from his pocket and looked at the small device.  He tapped the phone against his leg as his heart and his head battled one another for a few moments.  Finally, deciding to take a chance, he stood--completely ignoring Mike's inquisitive gaze as he left the room.  Chris pulled up his list of contacts, selected her number, and leapt-his heart pounding as he pressed the phone to his ear.