“I mean, it’s not like it’s the sort of thing we’d pick up anyway. Walter has always shot down every romance novel we’ve ever been pitched. That woman’s anger is completely misdirected. This isn’t my fault. So… whatever.” I huff and roll my eyes. “So… anything going on with you?”

“Course not. I’m a boring dude.” Curtis chuckles and shoves his hands in his pockets, his feet dragging the ground as we head for the diner.

Yes… we finally found a new place to eat. After the kidnapping incident last year, we both thought that changing up our routine a bit might be a good idea.

I’d like to sit here and tell you that I had some huge self epiphany or that Justin forgave me, but that would just make me a liar.

However, I did try to be nicer and less cynical, but quite frankly… I didn’t like it. Being a snark is kind of my thing, so that being nice shit lasted all of about two days.

I mean really, if there was some life lesson to be learned through all of this, I don’t know what the hell it was.

But, I’m sure that’s not the part you’re interested in. You want to hear what happened to Justin. People love psychos. It’s completely beyond me.

Unfortunately for you, I haven’t got a clue what happened to him. I haven’t seen him since the night he was arrested, which may I remind you, was also the night of his sisters wedding.

I’m fairly certain I gained at least 10 more bitch points for that.

There wasn’t even any news coverage on any of what happened. As far as I know, he got out of jail and went on with his life. So, there ya go.

I know… probably not the sunshine and rainbows ending you hoped for, but this is my life, not some sappy, lame ass Katherine Heigl movie.

“What’re you getting?”

“Salad and garlic bread. Duh.” I roll my eyes at Curtis as we finally reach our destination.

Come to think of it, I guess I did kind of learn something about myself through that whole mess.

Curtis was a thousand percent right when he called me out. I’ve always been a little over dramatic, almost to the point of being over the top. I’m kind of beginning to understand why he didn’t try to find me.

Granted, “kind of” are the operative words there.

Part of me is still a tad pissed, but we try to not talk about it. And it’s not because it was some horrible, traumatic event. There just isn’t anything to say about it anymore.

Sure, I could complain about the way my life was interrupted, or how I almost lost my job, but it was four days. Not really all that earth shattering if you think about it.

I was treated well, I was taken care of and deep, deep… we’re talking like, down in my toes, deep down…part of me hopes Justin and his family were able to work out their issues.

Lord knows, there’s plenty of crazy for that family to straighten out. I bet a therapist could make some huge ass bank off of those people.

But, probably the craziest thing of all, is that I kind of miss all those weirdos. They were highly entertaining, after all. At least for me, anyway.

But, it’s over and done with. It’s just a very, very odd thing that happened to me, and I’m sure it won’t be the last. Weird and crazy seem to follow me wherever I go.

Not really sure what that says about me though.

We quickly take our places in line, and I can’t help but laugh as Curtis stares at the menu hanging on the wall.

He can look all he wants. I know damn well he’ll be getting the same exact thing I am.

The man in front of us shuffles forward when the clerk beckons him and with the way he’s studying the menu, I have a bad, bad feeling that it’s gonna be quite awhile before I get my salad.

Hell, with my luck… the fucking lettuce will probably be wilted by the time this douche places his order.

“Ok… give me…a… chicken salad sandwich…. And…. Barbecue chips. Or no… sour cream and onion… no, no wait… plain. Ah… no… barbecue… definitely barbecue.”

My head snaps up immediately and I swear to Christ, I stop breathing. I’m pretty sure my heart isn’t even beating anymore.

Holy fuck… I just had a heart attack and died.

Great. I died in a fucking diner. I didn’t even get a last meal. Even prisoners on death row get a last meal!

The man in front of us picks up his tray, and everything seems to move in slow motion. He turns to find a table and I dart behind Curtis.

Oh. My. God.

Ok… breathe. Just breathe.

I manage to collect myself in a matter of seconds and keep my head down as Curtis places his order.

Why the fuck am I scared?

Ok fine, yes… I screwed up last year. But I fixed it! I dropped the charges and that is exactly why he’s here, in my diner, obsessing over what kind of chips to have with his lunch.

If it wasn’t for me, he’d be wearing a hideous orange jumpsuit, and sharing a cell with god only knows what.

So, yeah… I don’t need to be scared.

“Curtis… I’ll be right back.”

He nods disinterestedly and I quickly scan the diner. I find him seated at a table in the corner, by himself, chowing down.

I take a step forward and my mind goes blank. What the hell am I supposed to say to him?

‘Oh hey… sorry I turned you into the cops, but uhh… you kind of held me hostage?’

Right. That’ll work.

Maybe…

Maybe what we need is a clean slate.

I march over to the table and practically shove my hand in his face. “Hi, I’m Ellie.”

He looks up at me, eyes wide, a freaking chip hanging halfway out of his mouth. Somehow, that is so completely Justin. Awkward and kind of adorable.

“Wha… wha… what the hell are you doing?”

“Well… I was waiting in line for my lunch… saw you, and thought hey… he looks like a decent, attractive, mentally stable guy. And ya know… those are really, really hard to find.”

“Ellie… this isn’t funny.” He frowns and shakes his head. “I don’t know why you’re trying to fuck with me, but can’t you just.. Please, for the love of god… just let it be.”

“So, what’s your name?” I slide into the seat across from him and smile widely.

“Oh for fucks sake. Have you lost your god damned mind? I mean… seriously… why… just… why?”

I let out a long sigh and shoot him a pointed look. “Just work with me here, alright? I cooperated with you when you acted like a psycho.” He snorts in response and I roll my eyes. “Alright, I cooperated at least… sixty percent of the time.”

“Try twenty.”

“Fair enough.” I nod. “So… name please?”

He gives me a bored look and shakes his head. He’s trying his damnedest to hide it, but I can clearly see the smile creeping onto his face.

“Justin.”

“Alright Justin… age, line of work, favorite color, and… type of soap.”

“27. Graphic design. Dark green. And… it’s fucking soap Ellie. Who cares?” He chuckles softly. “Could you be more random?”

“Probably. But, since you’re all defensive about your soap… favorite restaurant?”

“Don’t really have one.” He shrugs. “Just somewhere quiet I guess. What’s with the 20 questions?”

Before I can answer, a loud voice calls out from the front of the diner and I don’t even have to look up to know who it is.

“Thanks for ordering without me. Ass. I told you I was…. “ He trails off as his eyes land on me and it takes all I have to not laugh. “What in holy fucking hell is she doing here?”

Justin smirks at me, then looks up at his best friend. “Trace… this is Ellie. Ellie, this is Trace.”

“Oh, real fucking funny.” He mutters and rolls his eyes. “You’re both god damned lunatics. I swear to Christ… surrounded by crazy assholes, all the damn time.” He continues to mutter to himself for several minutes, before a blonde on the other side of the diner catches his attention and he walks away without another word.

I don’t know how, but this is going surprisingly well. And, I’m actually kind of glad for that.

I can’t exactly say I like Justin, but… I always kind of thought, had he asked me out properly, I would have said yes.

“Ellie… this is a real cute game and all, but really… what’re you doing?”

“Teaching you how to ask someone out.” I shrug. “So, Justin… whadda ya say?”

“You… you’re… you’re asking me out?” He laughs loudly and shakes his head. “You have got to be the only woman on the planet who’s as crazy as I am.”

“I’m taking that as a yes.”

He laughs at me again, and for the first time, I’m seeing a genuine smile on the guys face.

“My parents ain’t gonna like this.”

“Your parents don’t even like you. So, no real change there.”

And that folks, is how the man who kidnapped me, became my boyfriend.