I don't think there was anything this man wasn't good at in life. Watching him go from dancing to playing every instrument on the stage, I was a fan. He blew my mind away. He was Justin Timberlake the superstar on that stage. I didn't even feel like I knew him at all. He was greatness.

For the first time in the entire show he pulls out a stool and sits.

"Whew! How we feeling NEW YORK! God I love this city. I love everything about it... " He exhales deeply "I normally at this time in the show do a couple ballads before I end the show and they go over very well however tonight I am feeling a little selfish. I wrote this song last night and I want to share it with you all... Anyways without going into a big dramatic long story I'm just going to play it, this is called "Give You Me" and this is for someone that is not here tonight but she means the world to me... so this one is for Bells." He breaks off... "Let me know what you think New York..."

The crowd got super quiet. I felt like everyone in the room knew I was standing right there. And what Justin didn't even know what I was in that room and I was standing about thirty feet from him.

He rests the guitar on his lap and begins to play.

"My shirt looks good on you... It'll never feel like mine again... And I suppose it's true...

Something starts when something ends... And I can't. We can..."

                He nods his head with the strum of the guitar as he continues to sing.

"It took me you to understand... My old life has found its end... And my world will never be mine again... And I give to you... Everything... And I what've done, yeah love will bring.... I'll give you everything in me... I give you me..."

                The tears are flowing down my face freeing now. His emotion was raw and painful.

"Every night I lost... I would save the lonely twice the cost... The road less traveled on... Loving you here in the dawn... I can't. We can..."

The guitar stops... you can hear a pin drop in this arena right now. All their focus is on Justin and the lyrics he is singing. Without hesitation he begins to sing again acoustically this time, no guitar, just his voice echoing through the venue.

"Something so simple... Still is true... Somehow the reasons ... Left me you and I don't want to think again... Oh noo... I know... Ohh..."

                He stands looking out at the crowd that still is screaming from every direction. He pans over the entire crowd, taking in that moment. "Now that I depressed everyone let's bring the beat back." he turns to his keyboardist "Let's attempt to cheer this crowd up Kevin!"

                I sat in my seat as everyone around me stood during the encore. I had become a Kinsey, I had hurt him. I had hurt the one person that might ever love me in my entire life. How could I have let myself get so close to someone knowing I was going to break their heart? How selfish was I to do that to someone? How selfish was I to do that to him?

                The woman standing on the other side of me bends down and asks, "Are you okay? Does he fluster you as well?"

I smiled at the idea that a stranger who she has never met before and probably never will, could make her feel like that. "I'm okay."

"Alright, just checking." She turns her attention back to the stage then snaps her head back quickly. "You're Arabella... you're Bells. You're his new girlfriend... and I'm sitting next to you making a complete fool out of myself." She was embarrassed.

"You are a fan. Isn't that what fans are supposed to do?" I joked with her.

"Is he really as amazing as he seems?" she questioned, almost hesitate to ask.

"Yes." I answered.

"That song he wrote for you is beautiful. He really loves you."

"Yes, he does." I nodded my head. "He really does."

                The crowd started to disappear quickly as I sat in that seat, off in a daze, which was quickly interrupted by my phone, before I could even say hello I was being yelled at... "Where the hell are you Arabella? If I have to come to your house and drag you back here I will I -"

"Andre, calm down. I'm still in my seat. I'm still here."

Click. The phone went dead.

                I see Andre run out onto the stage. "Come on" he demanded.

I stood and walk towards the stage but I couldn't do this. He deserves love and I can't give him that. "I can't do this. I can't give false hope to him. Did you hear the lyrics in that song? He loves me...  I need to not cause him anymore pain. I need to disappear from his world. I'm getting married..."

"I need you to at least talk to him. I need you to do this for you."

"What's it going to change? No matter what gets said, it won't change the outcome, we can't be together."

"You need to call of this wedding. You deserve the best ... and the best for you is Justin." He took my hand, "Now... let's go."

                He pulled me through the backstage area into a hallway of rooms. His name surrounded me. Every door and every sign had his name on it. Standing in the doorway I see him sitting on the couch in his dressing room. He was heartbroken; his eyes look lost in the mix. There were tabloids and magazines lying on the table in front of him. He must now see what I saw.

Slowly I walk into the room, closing the door behind me. He didn't hear a thing because he didn't move. I sat down next to him, placing my hand on his leg, reaching for his hands that were balled up together. He turned his head quickly and locked his tear filled eyes with mine. He released his hands and wrapped them around my face. "Please tell me I'm not dreaming. Please tell me that I'm feeling you sit right next to me..."

I couldn't say anything. I knew the moment I would try to speak the tears would be nonstop. I couldn't handle seeing that pain in his eyes. I was hurt but I can deal with my own issues, seeing him hurt was something I don't ever want to see.

"Talk to me Bells... please. Talk to me." He pleaded.

"I ca-n't" the water is starting to boil over the edge of my eyelids.

"What's going on with you?"

I look up at this baby blues, "I know that you have moved on Justin, I don't need to be coddled about that. I understand that you have needs and that I have a fiancé. I will be-

He cuts me off. "I haven't been seeing anyone. I have been waiting for you." He picks up the magazine on the table, "Is this what you are referring to?"

I nod my head, "Yes."

"Those are tabloids Bells. Ninety eight percent of the time they are incorrect. That woman," he points down at the picture, "That woman is my PR Agent. She has been spending some time on the road because of all the drama that the press has been feeding lately. If you notice there are no front shots of her in any of these pictures... if there was, people would know who she was instantly. She has been with me for years. If they can run with a story, they are going to do it for as long as they can."

"Why didn't you tell me that you were starting to tour? Why would you hide something like that from me?"

"I didn't purposely hide it from you... with you Bells my career isn't the focal point in our relationship, who we both are, is most important. I didn't think that was so important. Plus you had things to think though..."

"I was going to leave my entire life behind for you. I was going to give everything up for you... of course some information about you traveling around the country, being in a different city every day was something I wanted to know."

"You said... you was going to give up your family... does that mean you are going to marry Gavin?"

"I don't know what I want to do anymore. I don't know anything."

"Do you love me?" he asks, staring directly into my eyes.

"It's not that easy..."

"It's a question, and it's either a yes or no answer. Because Bells I can't keep doing this... I can't handle the ups and the downs like this. You have a choice to make and whatever that choice is you have to be the one to live with it."

"Yes. I love you. I think I may have loved you from the moment we met."

"You have control of your destiny Bells. Take life by the horns and pull it in whatever direction you want."

That was my speech. "How do you know that? How do you know that speech?"

"I was there Bells. I wasn't going to let the love of my life graduate from Medical School and not be there."

"Why didn't you wait to see me? Why did you just leave?"

"I watched you make that speech and you were so poised and so confident... It was a selfish choice. I couldn't stand there and watch you do something I knew you didn't want to be doing. And not just medical school and being a doctor, it was everything. I knew you weren't happy. But I also knew that I couldn't stand alone anymore. I couldn't be the ‘almost' guy." He rubs his hands over his face, the dark circles under his eyes were a sure sign he didn't sleep last night. "I wish I would have never left that voicemail... I was hurt and Bells... I could be your ‘almost' guy for the rest of my life and I would be content with that."

"What do I do now?" I asked.  "How do I give up the love of my life for my family? But how do give up my family for the love of my life? I should be able to have both. I shouldn't have to choose." I started venting, getting louder, "I know they my family is horrible I know that I'm treated like shit by them but they are still my family at the end of the day. What if..." I start to tremble and he takes my hand, "What if I give up my family and you decide you don't love me? Then what? Then I have no one."

"I love you. I don't know how many times I have to say it before you actually believe it but my love isn't something I just hand out. I love you and I'm not going anywhere. I love you..." he says slowly.

I took his face into my hands, slowly presses my lips onto his. He didn't resist at all. I had be this close to him with touching him. I couldn't be in this room alone with him and not want to feel him. I climbed on top of him, easing myself into his lap, kissing every each of his face and down his neck. I wanted all of him. He pushed my face away from his skin, holding it steady in his hands. Looking at me... as if he wanted to say something but instead he stands as I wrap my legs tighter around his waist. He drops me onto the counter slowly grazing the stubbles of his unshaven face against the skin on my neck. "I want to make love you to Bells."

"What's stopping you?" I asked breathlessly.

"This counter." He joked, tapping his palm on it.

"Sorry the counter likes it rough." I joked back as he already had my jeans off and my panties wrapped around his fingers, edging them down my body. Returning to my face I see a part of the Justin I knew back in his eyes. "I love you." I said.