The four walls of this conference room had become my new home. Spending days and days alone in that room wasn't the greatest feeling. There were people in and out all day but it wasn't the same. I was alone. I was lonely.

Distance is something I have to get used to. Justin is on tour, I never see him anymore. With my schedule and his schedule, they never mesh well. It's been two weeks since I have seen him. New York has been keeping me busy, working diligently trying to get this line together quickly but efficiently.

My family has completely kept their distant from me. My mother or father had not called me, nor had my brother or sister. I tested my family and they failed, they failed miserably. I know that in the end I made the choice but it doesn't mean that I didn't want the approval of my mother. She was after all my mother. She if anyone is supposed to love and support me. But life as a Kinsey had nothing to do with love and support. The traditions and way of life in the bloodline were not negotiable.

Everything seemed to be going wrong today. Every detail I put my hands on fell apart. With the morning sun rising slowly over the city skyline, I decide to call it a day. I think destroying four complete designs, losing a promoter and having the very first fight of Justin and I's relationship was enough for one day.

I was such a bitch to him. I was so mad at myself for the way I spoke to him. It wasn't his fault. I was irritated and frustrated and took it out on him. I felt bad but I knew there was nothing I could do to take it back, it was already done. The tone of hurt and disappointment in his voice was worse than I ever thought it could be.

Being in his apartment alone was difficult. I should have taken the apartment on the Upper East Side like I had planned on but he insisted that I stay there. There was no reason for me to spend money on rent when his is empty most of the time anyways. I liked that I was saving all that money, because let's face it, I was not working and getting paid. I agreed to only get paid when the line was finished. Truthfully it was better for me and I would profit more that way because of the rights and commission but that was before I had the bombshell dropped on me this morning.

The last thing I ever expected was my family to clear out my bank accounts. I understood that there was a riff there, but they had no right to take away what they had already given me. That was my trust fund and they took it away. I used to not think about money at all but I was faced with the realization that I was nearly broke and living in the most expensive city in the country. I guess lucky for me, I thought something like this would happen. I never thought it actually would, but I had prepared for it. I was never the poster child for this bloodline and I had put all the money I ever made working into a separate account that my parents were unaware of. I was beyond glad that this was the option that I chose; otherwise I would be flat broke with a horrible designer shoe addiction.

Four hours of sleep and I drug myself into a cab and headed to the airport. I think it was beyond my time to get out of the city for a while. My flight to Los Angeles is boarding in just minutes and I will spend the next few weeks there. In this airport surrounded by people staring and guys with cameras taking pictures of me sitting in a chair is annoying. I wanted to be in L.A. but I didn't want to go to L.A. Knowing what I should do I walked back up to the counter and talked to the woman behind the ticket counter.

"I need to change my ticket. I need to go to Denver." I blurted without even thinking about it anymore.

"Ma'am, there is a fee for changing the flight." She expressed.

"I don't care." I really did care; I had to watch what I was doing. But I needed to see him.

I walked down back to my seat and picked up my overnight bag, headed to the new terminal. I had to see him. I tried to call him but he didn't answer. I wasn't surprised I would want to talk to me either if I didn't have to. I left a short message...

"...I know I said this fifty times but I'm sorry. I shouldn't have taken my bad day out on you. I miss you. I'm about to board my flight, I just wanted you to know that. I. love. you."

"Welcome to Denver... " the sign read as I walked out of the terminal. Who would have thought I would have ended up in Denver, CO today? It was nice to walk into a airport and not have it filled with press tracking my every move. I freely walked to baggage claim and waiting as the belts start to move. The pit in my stomach has gotten bigger as the moments get closer to seeing him. How would he react to seeing me just show up after my behavior yesterday?

My phone started beeping from missed alerts.

"I'm sorry I missed your call. It's been crazy busy today. Finally it's time to relax before the show tonight. I don't even know if I have the energy for this show tonight. Anyways call me back when you get this."

He never said, he loved me... he never said he understood. How was he going to feel when I randomly just show up?

I was stressing myself out.  I reached my arm up to hailed a cab and the woman next to me bump into me and took the damn cab. Furious I step up to the curb finally got one after ten minutes of attempting to wave down the stupid yellow car.

"Where to?" he asked politely.

"Pepsi Center please." I said annoyed. "I'm kind of in a hurry."

He begins to pull away from the curbside pickup area. "Going to see the Justin Timberlake concert? I have taken a couple people from the airport today to the venue. I take it your family as well?"

Without thinking about anything else I blurted out, "Girlfriend. I'm surprising him with a visit." Then I thought about it and wanted to kick myself. Why can't I just shut up?

"Girlfriend huh? He still hasn't settled down." He shakes his head. "Maybe you will change him."

"Loving him has changed my life. He is amazing. Why does everyone seem to think you have to be married to be happy?"

"I'm sorry I didn't mean to offend you. I was just making conversation."

"Sorry I shouldn't have snapped on you. It's not your fault. I'm sorry."

I really needed to contain myself. I needed to stop snapping on people that don't deserve it my attitude thrown at them. I sat quietly for the rest of the ride. I figured if I didn't say anything I couldn't be any more disrespectful.

I stepped out of the vehicle and realized that I was twenty five hundred miles away from my backstage pass. "Damn it." I said loudly shaking my head. I should have it with me at all times. I knew exactly where it was. I stood outside of the venue thinking how the hell am I going to pull this off without calling him? Maybe I should just call him? Andre! I thought perfect Andre! I sent him a text.

"Andree, I need your help."

He immediately calls me. "What's up babe?"

"I left my pass in NY and I'm in Denver trying to surprise Justin with a visit. I'm not very good at this if you can't tell."

"Just go to the back entrance, give them your name. You are on a permanent list. They will give you a temp pass. You will be fine!"

"Are you not here?" I asked, already knowing the answer.

"No, I'm in L.A. in the office trying to get the 2nd leg of his tour fixed. There were some dates that needed adjusted."

"2nd leg? How long is that going to last?" I asked.

"It's probably going to be around forty-forty five more dates."

"So a couple months?"

"At least. A lot of the dates are overseas. It takes longer to get to each city there. So the dates are more spread out."

I would have to give up Justin for several more months. I was super quiet as I stood on the side of the building leaning against the cement as the sidewalks began to get fuller and fuller.

"Arabella..." he said breaking the silence, "You will learn to deal with your schedules. It's not always going to be like this."

"I know, I just miss him. I have never needed someone the way I need him. And right now I have no one so I really need him"

"You know I am always just a phone call away."

"I know. But everyone's busy and I wouldn't want to be a burden to anyone."

"Honey you mean the world to me. Never thing that. Now get inside and see Justin. It will make you feel better." Only if he knew what kind of person I have been for the last couple days.

The inside of the venue is super quiet except for a piano coming from inside on the stage. They said Justin was doing pre-sound check and didn't want to be interrupted but I don't listen very well. I walk in through the side entrance of the stage and found myself sitting there watching him play. The passion that's in his eyes when he is playing is breathtaking. He feels every word he sings.

His eyes were closed, and his hands slowly moved over the keys, "Now if you're ever wondering... About the way I'm feeling ... Little girl there ain't no question... Just to be around you is a blessing... Sick and tired of trying to save the world... I just wanna spend my time with you girl... What you give me lets me know I'll be alright...."

I would like to think that the words he is singing are about me but that song was wrote long before he met me. He hasn't performed it live in a long time but he must have added it to the set tonight.

"Cause if your love is all I had in this life... That would be enough until the end of time... Rest your weary heart and relax your mind... Cause I wanna love you girl until the end of time..."

His voice echoed through the venue, bouncing the sound of his voice right back down at me.  His eyes were still closed, singing with complete emotion. "Ohhh ohh ohh yea... Ohhh ooh ohhh ohh ohh yea... Ohhhh ohh ohh ohh oh oh yea... "

                God I loved that man.

He stop playing the piano, dazed off into some other place when I started clapping very loudly from the darken spot I was sitting in. He looks up quickly but can't figure out who it is. He stands up and walks toward stage left, walking right towards me. I stepped out of the darkness and into the light.

"Bells!" He said with such joy before rushing into my arms.

I wrapped my arms around him tight. "I'm sorry ... I missed you." I said before resting my lips on his. His hands were placed over the side of my face, pulling me in slowly. He deepens the kiss as his hands slowly went from the small of my back to removing my shirt over my head.

"I love you." He says again, as he pins my hands over my head, pushing me against the wall.