I sat awake anxiously as the sun rises up over the hills of Los Angeles. I was up early to head into the design studio with Jack to introduce the designs to Troy Carter but he called and cancelled this morning. He was on a flight to Paris to fix something that had a possibility of not having a way to be fixed. I wanted to know what he thought about the designs, considering he is the one forking over the money for the first line. He has continuously said that he would have never invested any amount of money if he didn't think the designs were going to succeed. I was glad he had the high confidence because every time something minor fell apart I would panic. I was going to get one shot and one shot alone. I had to hit the head on the nail with one try.

This enormous bed was lonely. The crisp white sheets were chilly and boring, but I won't tell Justin just yet. I wouldn't want to change everything about his room before he even see's the remodeling that was done. I laid there until I couldn't lie there anymore. The day was going to waste by doing nothing.

Not even changing into clothes I bounced down the steps in one of Justin's William Rast flag tee's from his drawer, I had hoped that it smelled like him but I wasn't so lucky. The shorts were tiny but it covered what it needed to. I proceeded to clean up the mess that I had left in the kitchen last night. It was weird how much excitement it gave me to have to clean this mess up. I never had to do anything growing up; we had someone to do that for us.  I took my time making the kitchen just as spotless as it was when I walked in the door.

A nice brisk early morning run in the canyon sounded amazing, but the idea of facing the photographers was enough to veto that decision instantly. I cringe at the idea of even leaving the house. Their presence outside the security gates was enough for me.

Sketching was clarity for me. Time didn't exist once I begin to start sketching. Hours could go by and I wouldn't know any difference. Case and point. Sitting on the floor in the living room with Justin's debut album blasting in the background I manage to sketch two dozen different pair of heels. Each line, each detail, each style turns into something new.

The CD has repeated itself at least four times. I drop my sketch pad into my lap, listening to the listening to the opening piano playing a soft melody. His voice...  The passion, the hurt, the pain, the admissions, the heartbreak in his voice was... heartbreaking.

"Would have given up my life for you... I guess it's true what they say about love it's blind... Girl you lied straight to my face... Looking in my eyes... And I believed you cause I loved you more than life... And all you had to do was apologize..."

I felt that pain for him. I felt that emptiness he was feeling.

"You didn't say you're sorry... I don't understand... You don't care that you hurt me... And now I'm half the man I used to be... When it was you and me... You didn't love me enough... My heart may never mend... And you'll never get to love me again..."

The tears begin to stream down my face. His heartbreak came through his voice.

"Sadness, has me at the end of the line... Helpless, watched you break this heart of mine... Loneliness, only wants you back here with me... Common sense, knows that you're not good enough for me... And all you had to do was apologize and mean it..."

I felt the warmth of muscular arms wrapping around my shoulders from behind, the gentle soft lips of his pressed against my cheek. I turned to see him right there. He was finally home. Home. "Why exactly are you listening to this?" he asked with the biggest smile on his face. Buckley and Brennen run behind him into the house. They were so cute that I didn't even notice that they were knocking over things in their path. They were excited to home again. Between spending time at Trace's during the renovation and on a tour bus with Justin, they didn't get to run free in their comfort zone. They disappeared into the others room.

I leaped onto my feet, scattering my sketch book all over the floor, standing on my tippy toes I wrap my arms around him. "She really broke your heart didn't she? Are you still half the man you were?"

He exhaled deeply, "I think my heart was forever changed after that relationship, but I think I learned to really love someone after her. I learned you can't trust everyone. I learned how much power means to people... I learned a lot... but I honestly wouldn't take any of it back. If I went back and could change anything, I wouldn't. That relationship changed me into the person I am today. That heartbreak, led me to you. I'm a better man without her." He leans down, pressing his lips on mine, slowly rubbing the small of my back. "Do me a favor. Please don't listen to my cd's... that's... I dunno... a little weird."

"But I like them."

He walks over to the radio pressing the pause button. "I will sing to you all you want... you just have to ask. It's weird to walk in the house and hear your own voice on the radio being blasted."

"Fine." I puckered up my bottom lip. He came back across the living room quickly tackling me to the floor causing me to fall to my back, as he straddles himself over me, "Trousersnake huh? I can see where that came from."

He laughed as he shook his head, "Are you googling me again?"

"Sorry. I can't resist and OH MY GOD..." my eyes were almost bugging out of my face as I looked up at him. "I watched a VERY interesting fifty seconds of your film career... wow I'm still hot and bothered by it." I began to fan my face.

"Was the scene something like this?" He tore off his shirt, tossing it on the floor, then reached to pull mine over my head.

I unbuckle his jeans, "Close..." I said as he kicks his jeans off. He removed the panties I had on, tossing them to the other side of the room. He slides his index finger up my leg slowly causing goose bumps to form as he moved up, inching closer and closer to where I wanted his hands to be. He runs his fingers over my sensitive lips before the palm of his hand glides over the entire upper half of my body, resting his hands slightly above my head, pinning both arms down tightly. "I think were in need of some shackles..." I whispered in his ear, "I want to be your slave!"

He growled in my ear, raising my legs about my head, immediately he entered me forcefully. "I'd rather be your slave." His finger nails dug in deep around my wrist with every movement he would make. Thrust after thrust, eventually we were both worn out and collapse on the floor. I pulled myself into his chest.

"I missed you!" I kissed his forehead.

"God I missed you Bells... Time without you is so hard." He rests his head on my shoulder. "I wish you could come with me."

"Ok... please let's not talk about being hard and coming in the same sentence because I'm a little worn out at his moment."

He laughs and says "You're such a dirty girl... and I love it!" As he climbs up off the floor. "I have to say that probably the best ‘welcome home' I have ever gotten."

I stood on my slightly wobbly legs, bending over to pick up my shirt and panties. "That dirty grin on your face only makes me want to welcome you again."

"Could you just stay like that? I like that view." Justin says staring at my ass bent over.

"You would like that too much." I stood up straight putting the t-shirt back on. "Plus we would never get any actual work done."

"Oh I would get A LOT done." He says pulling me back close to him.

"Ouch." I said as he had grabbed the bruise on my forearm. I dropped my arm, hoping he didn't see it or that he just grabbed me the wrong way... anything... but I wasn't so lucky.

He gently takes my arm, pulling it towards him, turning to see the massive bruise that was now a beautiful deep purple color. He presses his lips to it gently, slowly rubbing his fingers over it. "How did you get this? It looks like it hurts."

"I got it shopping yesterday." I dropped my arm out of his hands. Turning to pick up all the sheets of paper scattered around the room.

"Bells." He said stern. "Where is the bruise from? How did you get it?"

"Honestly?" I questioned.

"Well of course I want the truth."  He said.

"Honestly, I don't want to tell you." I continued to put the sketches into the design book on the table where they belonged.

He thought about for a moment, "Did I give you that bruise?" He walks over, steps in front of me between my body and the table. "You can tell me anything."

I looked into his eyes and watched as the words begin to roll off my tongue; his eyes went from worry to fury. He starts to pace around the living room shaking his head. He was pissed, just as I thought he was going to be. I would have been more than willing to keep this information to myself.

He walks out of the room still pissed off. "Justin" I said trying to get his attention back to something else other than this. He continues to walk away from me, into the kitchen and out onto the back patio. His arms were flying around in the air. His face was flushed and clearly still very unhappy. I see the back of his head shaking in the direction that he was saying no or disapproving of something. He rests his free hand in his pocket finally. He seems to have calmed down.

I open the door and step out onto the patio, the boys follow behind me. They sit next to me, looking up at me. I stooped down to their level, petting both of them at the same time as I watch Justin on the phone. I can hear his one sided conversation.

"...-That's what I am going to have to do. She shouldn't have to deal with this. For Christ sakes... if I lose her because of this... I swear to you right now, I will walk away from everything. I will give it all up.... I know...  I love you to... I'll see you when you get here tomorrow..."

He dropped his elbows to the outside concrete of the balcony, resting his face in his hands. I could see his back rising and falling from his heavy breathing.

"Justin..." I said quietly. He turns to see me standing in front of him, the water works in full affect. "I can't let you do this."

"Babe..." he takes my hands into his.

I interrupt him, "Please, let me say this... I can't let you give up everything for me. I know that I'm not used to this life you have but please know that I'm not going anywhere. Am I scared of what they can do to me... now, yes I'm a little worried, but I love you and that's not going to change. I wouldn't give them the satisfaction that they want. I will learn to deal with everything."

"Well I'm going to change some things. You are not going to have to worry every moment you go out of this house. My mother is contacting the security company right now. Shawn is with me at all times and I am going to have someone with you at all times."

"I don't need a baby sitter Justin."

"Its security Bells... and you need it." He lifts my arm. "This... should never happen. Plus I want you be to safe and feel safe."

"This is a whole new world for me."

"As high profile as your father is the Hampton's, I thought maybe you had experienced things like this."

"My father gets followed depending on what is currently going on with the hospital but they have never bothered anyone else."

I wasn't sure how I felt about having someone with me at all times. I think that could get a little overwhelming as well. I like my alone time when I want it. This was going to be something else I have to get used to being here, in a relationship with Justin.