Justin

I’m sitting in my car with the windows rolled up and the radio off, gripping the stirring wheel as I try hard as hell to calm down, but I can’t.

I’m beyond glad that I left that hell’s gift to men inside otherwise I don’t know how I would restrain myself from strangling her.

Honestly, I should have known better then to think that I could have a peaceful date with the evil bitch formerly known as Azaria, but no… I just had to have her to myself, and look where my selfishness got me. It certainly didn’t get me any sex. If that were the case, I wouldn’t be mad.

A knock on the window pulled me out of my trance. I turned to my right; it was her (the bitch). What the fuck does she want?

I acknowledged her, but I made no move to unlock the door. She was saying something, but it was somewhat difficult to understand her with the windows up, not as if I gave a damn anyway. I had nothing to say to her right now, so it would be best if she just gave me some time to cool off.

However, as she continued to stand out in the cold mouthing words (some of which appeared to be obscene), I felt sorry for her, not because it was ten degrees below zero tonight and she had on a knee-length dress, but because for once she was the fool.

This time I was right and she was in the wrong, wrong because she had absolutely no motive to slap me. I’ll give her credit for the other time because on that particular occasion I was deserving of a slap, but tonight I was only telling the honest to God truth. Ian did want to fuck her. I knew it and so did everyone in the office.

If Azaria would just open up her fucking eyes she would be able to see what I see. And I mean that both figuratively and literally.

As I reached to turn on my stereo then increase the volume, I mused over my situation with Azaria and realized how stupid the whole thing was. It’s evident that there is still a game between the two of us…the damn game had never ended in the first place.

Now that I think back… it had begun as soon as she fucking started working with me. As soon as she became my partner, she became my problem.

She continued to corrupt my mind. Before her, I had never given my female co-workers a second glance- probably not even a first. I just wasn’t into “fraternizing” at work.

When I had first met Azaria, she seemed so sweet. Everyone in the office took to her quickly, including myself- shit, she had me at hello. Yes, I know it’s corny, but true. She was like a vision of loveliness, easy to talk to and good at her job; I couldn’t have asked for a better partner…but then BAM that vision shattered--Just like my fucking window!

The glass crumbled, most of it falling outside. Azaria stepped away so that she wouldn’t injure herself. How clever of her.

I don’t know what the fuck is wrong with this crazy bitch! She gets a couple of drinks in her system and decides to go on a rampage!

After I shielded myself from more crumbling shards of glass, I immediately jumped out the car and ran to the passenger side. I got in her face.

“Azaria what the fuck is wrong with you?” I gripped her by the arm and retrieved the rock from her hand before she could do any more damage to my car, but she resisted, holding on firmly.

“I swear Azaria if you don’t fucking stop, we’ll both be going to jail tonight and I mean it!” I wasn’t into hitting women, but a man can only be pushed so far and I’ve been pushed far enough tonight.

She dropped her shoulders as well as the rock. “Shit it’s cold out here and look at what I have on.” That was all she had to say! I stared at her in disbelief as I watched her casually stroll over to my car and reach in through the broken window to unlock the door. It’s like the fact that she had just bust my window didn’t mean shit. This is a dream I know it is, it has to be, but as much as I tried to convince myself that was true, I couldn’t.

“How can you just fucking walk away like that? Azaria I’m not playing with you! Azaria!” I was going hoarse trying to get through to her ass, but it was no use trying to make a bitch play nice. I was just going to have to get through to her using another method.

I bombarded Azaria before she could fully get in the car, causing her to scratch her arm on a shard of glass. She bellowed over in pain. “Ow Justin! What the fuck was that for?” It was honestly a mistake, but now she knew how my car felt.

I assisted her onto the curb just to be nice. “I am so going to kill you Justin.” I know this girl ain’t mad at me. Only one with good reasons to be mad is me, my car, and this big ass red mark on my face.

Azaria snatched her arm from my grasp and stumbled onto the curb. She landed on her ass and I didn’t even try to stop her from falling. When I leaned down to help her, a vice grip pulled me away from her. The next thing I knew I was pressed up against a wall kissing brick. What the hell?

“What the fuck is going on?” I was shoved harder into the wall at my outburst. Shit, that hurt!

My pockets were checked for what I suppose was money, it’s a damn good thing I didn’t have any of that.

“Let me go you ass! Azaria?” I can’t believe we were getting mugged! Where was a reliable citizen when you needed one? And who the hell is this fool? I looked over my shoulder to see a man dressed in a blue uniform…with a badge-a COP! Behind us, I saw a female cop helping Azaria to her feet. Aww fuck, were we being arrested?

“Are you alright Miss?” The woman asked while Azaria brushed the dirt and dust from her clothes, yet she was barely paying attention.

Instead, she looked at me confused as to what was going on. I returned the same confusion, that is, until an abrupt forceful shove from officer asshole sent my head in the other direction.

“Shit!” I had instinctively reached up to cover the spot on my face where Azaria had hit me earlier, which hurt even more now that I’m being abused. However, I didn’t get the chance to touch my face because the officer tightened his grip on my wrists, and now he was adding handcuffs to the mix. This situation is fucked up on so many levels.

The officer led me to his police car. He helped me in by pressing my head down, how thoughtful.

“Don’t try anything stupid. I’m keeping my eye on you.” He pointed to his eye then pointed back at me.

“All clear over here Officer James.” I mumbled watching Officer James join his female partner in an in-depth conversation with Azaria. I wondered what the hell they could possibly be talking about at a time like this. Whatever it was I hoped it had something to do with Azaria telling them that I was not abusing her, but then again her arm was currently bleeding. And as crazy as Azaria was acting tonight how would I know if she wouldn’t go the extra mile and have my ass carted off to jail. I mean she’s a creative woman, who knows what she could come up with.

She could make up some story about how I smashed my own window because she had locked herself in the car trying to get away from my crazy ass, and then tell them how I proceeded to drag her out and stab her with a sharp object. It sounded plausible to me and I’m sure the officers would believe her given that Azaria is a good actress. Hell, she fooled me plenty of times.

I rested my head against the window, wondering if I was overanalyzing the situation. I mean Azaria really isn’t that cut throat, is she? I know that there’s some shady shit that she’s capable of doing, but stooping to that low of a level would be way out of her league.

On the other hand, maybe it- it was no use to think positive when I am still sitting in a police car with my hands cuffed behind my back while Azaria stood before them obviously drunk. I noted her expression as she glanced at me; it had suddenly turned sour. I wonder why that is. My answer came to me faster than I had expected.

Suddenly the female officer was leading Azaria over to the squad car, without handcuffs might I add. Why was I treated like a common criminal while Azaria received comfort like a victim of domestic abuse when it is clear that she was the one who couldn’t keep her hands to herself?

The officer opened the car door for Azaria. “Are you sure you want to get in ma’am? It might not be safe in there.” She was definitely right about that one. I seriously wanted to choke somebody, that is, if my damn hands were free. Nonetheless, Azaria entered the car.

I watched her bare legs enter the car first as she slid into the back seat beside me. The roll of her eyes followed mere seconds later before she closed the door behind her.

“What the fuck are you doing in here?” Couldn’t she see that I didn’t want her here? My icy glare clearly showed my contempt for her, I’m sure even she could see it through her drunken stupor.

Azaria finally turned to me. “This wasn’t my idea.” She appeared to be nervous as she combed her fingers through her disheveled hair, which was unusual. If not for the fact that she was drunk, she would be cursing me out.

Wow, she looks horrible! This creature doesn’t even look like Azaria.

“Well who’s idea was it?” Sure, I was mindlessly asking questions, but I was more focused on Azaria’s appearance rather than her words. I’m not stuck on her beauty, in fact she was anything but that right now.

Her hair did not flow in loose curls as it would normally, her clothes did not fit perfectly as usual or the way it had before she knocked back eight drinks, and her breath probably smelled very unladylike.

“…He had suggested I come and sit in here with you.” What? He, who? I had missed the better part of her explanation during my trance, but I wasn’t going to let her know that. I’ll just wait until she unintentionally informs me.

“I really hate Ian sometimes. If he wasn’t my boss.” Bingo! I figured it was his dumb ass because only a dummy would suggest such a thing.

“What the hell does Ian have to do with any of this?” In the back of my mind, I knew the answer to that question. That bastard called the cops on us!

Azaria sighed and tossed her head back against the leather seat. She stayed that way for a few moments until the grimace cleared her face. “Didn’t you…hear what I sa-said?” I can barely understand you now.

Her hand reached over to me, but stopped before contact was made; leaving me unsure as to if she was still awake or not.

“Azaria?” I nudged her causing her head to fall onto my shoulder. I did it again and she sat up abruptly. The alcohol had finally kicked into her system. Hell, it probably had hours ago.

“Are they going to let me go?” My wrists were cramping.

Azaria shuffled in her seat uncomfortably. “Huh? Oh, yeah I told them…that this was just all a misunder- just wrong. And Ian managed to get us both off the hook.” How did she get off so easy? What she committed was a crime! And she didn’t even apologize.

“So can I get out of these cuffs or are you going to apologize first?” She didn’t directly look at me and only reached up to retrieve a pin from her messy hair. Afterwards she pushed at my shoulder so that my back faced her. Damn has this girl ever heard of being gentle?

She pulled at the handcuffs causing me to wince. I felt them tug against my wrist as she picked the lock with her hairpin. Why does she know how to pick a lock? Maybe she was rebellious during her teenage years.

Moments later the cuffs dropped against the seat and the feeling returned in my hands. I brought my hands forth, rubbing the pain away.

I rotated my body so that I was facing Azaria. I got a side view of her forehead resting against the windowpane, legs folded, and her bare feet tucked under her knees.

In the months that I’ve known her I have never seen her look so confused, so miserable. She always had attitude and intensity. Now she lacked both.

“Come on let’s get the hell out of here.” At my request, Azaria shifted in her seat as her gaze drifted towards mine. I swore I saw the tears in her eyes nearing the edge, but they never dropped.

Damn can I even be mad at her still? No. It’s not worth it. I’m over it and my face doesn’t even hurt anymore. However, she will fix my car once this shit blows over.

Azaria

I can’t even bare to look at Justin right now, especially while I’m in such a pitiful state, stretched out and crying my eyes out in the backseat of his car as the wintry draft from the passenger side hits me.

Why I busted his window, I’ll never know. Something inside of me snapped after I had those few drinks. It was a feeling of intense anger that I hadn’t felt in a long time. That I didn’t know I still possessed. No, it wasn’t anger. It was the feeling that I was being abandoned…again.

When Justin had locked me out of the car and hadn’t responded to any of my comments, I got angry and worried. I didn’t even consider that Justin should be the one angry because I got out of hand and slapped him again.

And the worst part (besides him almost getting locked up because of me) was that he wasn’t even mad at me. Sure he probably wanted to choke me and he probably called me a “bitch” a few times, but he didn’t have second thoughts about helping me during my moment of foolishness.

I wiped at my eyes as I called for Justin. He was probably glancing back at me every few seconds.

“Hmm?”

“Sorry.” There was a long moment of silence after my apology before I begun to cry again.

Justin

As we reached Azaria’s floor, I stumbled from the elevator while I literally supported as much of Azaria’s weight as I could without carrying her. When we reached her apartment, I dug around through her purse to retrieve her keys. I unlocked the door, ushered us inside, and closed the door behind us, all before letting her stand on her own.

“You gonna be alright?” I put my hand on her shoulder.

She stared at me pitifully. “Yes.” She mumbled before making a run for her bedroom. She slammed the door behind her. Seconds later I heard the bed squeak, probably from her throwing herself onto it.

I made my way over to the sofa. I threw myself into its softness as well. I’m worn out and my head hurts. My mind was on overload, it’s ability to think and assess situations had reached its capacity. More memorable experiences than I care to remember have occurred tonight.

More importantly, I have seen about two new sides of Azaria that I can add to the ones I’ve already come to know. She might be a crazy woman with anger management issues and she actually has emotions and insecurities (well when she’s drunk).

When she cried in the car and cried in the elevator, it was overwhelming. She looked like a child, a helpless one. I’m sure she was in her room now, attempting to pull herself together so that she could go back to her old strong self. I wonder if that was just an image, a front that she put on for the workplace.

Suddenly, Amir exited his room and headed straight for the kitchen. I followed him on his way to the refrigerator.

He nodded at me. “Hey man, what’s up?”

I leaned against the counter. “Why didn’t you tell me that your sister was fucking crazy?”

“What?” He laughed, retrieving the gallon of milk.

“Your sister. She’s a nut job man.”

“What did she do? Or should I ask what you did?” Huh?

“Me! Your sister slapped me and then busted my car window.” I stood up in a defensive stance.

He turned to me after getting the cereal from an upper cabinet. “She did? Damn. You must’ve let her drink.” I held my tongue. What did I do wrong?

“I didn’t know she wasn’t supposed to drink.”

“It’s not a health issue or anything.” He poured milk and cereal into a bowl. “She just be on some serious emotional shit after she drinks. All problems resurface.” Problems resurfacing? Was he trying to throw me a hint now?

“What happened to make her drink?” He asked while putting a spoonful of Peanut Cap’n Crunch to his mouth.

I fumbled for a response. “We kind of got into an argument about her fronting, because that’s what you told me she was doing, remember?” He probably will deny it. “And then I unintentionally mentioned her mother.”

Amir’s spoon clanked against the ceramic bowl after he dropped it. “You busted her on her fronting and mentioned ma?” He shook his head and resumed eating. “Bad combo man. Anytime ma comes up Azaria goes, how should I say…berserk. She has her own personal rebellion followed by a pity party. Where is she now in her room?” I nodded my reply. “Figures. I’ll check on her in a minute.”

“If I hadn’t witnessed some of this shit she probably would have never told me.”

He shrugged. “Azaria is too private, whatever information you want, you gotta drag it out of her.” I’ll keep that in mind. However, I’ll rather get the information from Amir since he’s so straightforward.

“She used to go to therapy, you know?”

I shook my head. “That isn’t hard to believe now.”

“She had a lot of bad habits she needed to break. She used to have such a low outlook of herself. Now not so much. It took her a long time to reach that level of confidence.”

“Your sister is definitely confident.”

“She didn’t always think she was beautiful.” Now that was hard to believe.

“What! Your sister is bangin’. I’ve been trying to get with her since I met her.” Amir cut his eyes at my enthusiastic response. I guess he didn’t like that I was so attracted to his sister. Tough shit.

“Mom’s bouncing hit her hard. I wasn’t old enough to care so I’m pretty much issue-free. Azaria was enough of a mother for me.” Damn, that was a nice speech he had going on. He’s three years younger than Azaria, but he’s mature and seems to take care of her. Just what she needs.

Amir and I turned in the direction of a door opening. It was Azaria’s bedroom door. Amir immediately jumped up to meet his sister.

“You cool?” When she nodded, he put her head on his shoulder. “Don’t go breaking no more shit, okay boo?” I was surprised to see Azaria smile at him. He kissed her forehead before returning to his room.

Azaria’s eyes met mine. Her hair was down, framing her face, and she had changed into flannel pajamas. She looked refreshed.

She entered the kitchen and began putting away Amir’s leftover dishes. She initiated a conversation with me even though her back was facing me.

“So what did you and Amir talk about? Me, of course.”

“Yeah, I received a lot insight.”

“I just bet. Amir talks too damn much, especially about other people.” She whipped on the faucet, washing the dirty dishes. I attempted to talk over the running water.

“But I understand you more, and here I thought you weren’t crazy…” She whirled around to face me, soap dripping from her hands. “He definitely proved me wrong.”

“Hmmph.” She smirked, turning away from me again. “I have my reasons.”

“Oh I know.” Don’t mention the mother.

“It’s my mom’s fault.” Why’d she have to do that?

I walked up behind her. “Azaria don’t-I don’t want to see you go berserk.”

“I’m over it.” She waved her hand in the air. She stared at me. “See no tears. Speaking of that…” She pulled me close by my collar, wet hands and all. “You better not tell a soul that I was crying.”

“I won’t.”

“Promise?” Her gripped tightened. She was her old demanding self again. I must say that I actually missed it.

“Promise.” She released me after I abided.

“I’m going to go now.” I reached over to hug her and she let me. Wow I like this new Azaria…somewhat.

“What? No kiss goodnight?” Azaria smirked at me. She was tempting me.

“No, I’m not going to kiss you. But that’s what’s wrong with you, isn’t it? You need to be kissed badly, and not just by anybody, but by someone who knows how.”

“And that someone is you?” She put a damp hand against my previously sore cheek. “Sorry, I don’t mix business with pleasure.”

“So you admit it, I’m pleasurable.” A wide grin formed on my face.

Instead of making a comeback as usual, she rolled her eyes and her lips parted into a smile. Mirroring her stance, I put one hand on her cheek, cradling her face in my palm.

She didn’t take a step back when I took one forward. I toyed with her hair before my lips settled upon hers. I didn’t know whether to give her only a sample taste or knock her out with my skill. Either way, our lips rested against each other’s for a moment before I initiated more.

Her lips parted on their own (I’m sure she couldn’t fight that reaction), inviting me to nibble them a bit. She inhaled a breath of air between our lips. My tongue didn’t take that as invitation and my hands remained stationery. One was in her hair and the other against the small of her back. I hadn’t tried anything extra because I didn’t want her to later say that I violated her if and when she started to regret this.

Azaria seemed to have other plans though. She had a more aggressive approach. She planted her body firmly against mine, gripped the hair just above my nape, and the other grasping the sink behind her for support.

Could I really reject her advances? I mean I’m only a man after all.

I was this close to lifting her into my arms when I decided to have a moment of self-control. Damn I have the worst timing.

I sat Azaria atop the counter, moved away, and told her to stay put. I wasn’t rejecting her (hell no) just putting this on hold. We could continue when I was sure that this is what she wanted.

“I’m going for real this time, okay?” I told her. She stared back blankly. “Goodnight. See you on Monday if I don’t wake up with the flu because of my broken window.” My comment must’ve brought her out of her trance because she smiled at me.

“Goodnight Justin.”