Chapter 24
“I don’t want that gangster near my home again!” My mother screamed at me. I had walked into the house knowing I was going to receive a scolding for talking to Justin, and that was exactly what I got.
“Don’t act like I invited him here! I didn’t!”
“I don’t care! He is dangerous, Natalia! I don’t want him near you or los ninos either!”
“I can’t keep him from his own fucking children!” I screeched at her. That was a big mistake.
“Don’t you dare raise your voice at me, Natalia Solana!”
“I’m sorry.” I sighed. “But you have to realize that I can’t keep him from the babies. He could try and take them from me if I do.”
“Natalia, mijita, I just don’t want to see you back with that trash. He is not good enough for you.”
“I know I know.” I had the biggest headache from this conversation. I just really wanted to punch someone or something.
It wasn’t my fault that Justin was here. It wasn’t like I called him and asked him to find me. God damnit, I even turned him down to reconcile with him. Was everything I did wrong?
Why was the blame always on me?
“I’m sorry, Natalia… I am just afraid to lose you and the twins.”
“I know… and I’m sorry too.” I hugged my Mom tightly, holding back my pain as usual. I couldn’t keep bottling it up and letting it explode at the worst times. “How is William?”
“He’s fine. He was just surprised at how strong Justin is. He broke the lock on the door with just one kick to it.”
“Jesus.” I said, but I knew quite well that Justin was capable of doing a lot more damage.
I didn’t know what else to say, so I just went to check on the twins. I had no clue what I was going to say to soothe them, but anything was worth a shot.
**
The next day I decided to go visit Savannah. I was so confused about life and Ricky was away for the weekend. I was so thankful that I at least had Savannah to turn to in this stressful time.
She was staying at Ricky’s so I made my way to his apartment. I thankfully had my own set of keys so I let myself in.
“Annah?”
That lazy bum was probably sleeping still. I rolled my eyes and laughed. That girl loved to sleep. Some things would never change. I headed to her bedroom and pushed the door open.
“Savannah! Wake your ass- Oh My God! I’m so sorry!” I slammed the door shut, feeling nothing but pure shock at what I had just seen.
Savannah and Lance were sleeping together. What the fuck happened to her being engaged to JC? God damnit, life was a hell of a lot different.
Savannah came out of the bedroom alone, draped in a long bathrobe.
“I…” Savannah was trembling as she spoke. I just embraced her tightly.
“What I just saw I will take to the grave.”
“I just… JC wasn’t giving me the attention I needed…”
“Sweetie, don’t explain anything to me because I’m sleeping with David.” I blurted out. It felt good to tell her, just so she’d know I was on the same boat as her. “I know your motives, I know you feel hurt… a woman will only cheat if she’s unhappy.”
Sure I wasn’t cheating on Justin per say, but we both had a similar situation going on.
“David…he was a nice guy… Justin hates him.”
“I know he does. That’s something else that pushed me towards him.” I admitted that statement for the first time and it shocked me. But it was all true.
“Do you love him?”
“Love …? Love as a person yes… in love no.” I sighed and the two of us walked into the kitchen.
“I don’t love Lance… but it’s just… I miss JC and he won’t commit and he isn’t there for me. He purposely distanced himself from me.” She was on the verge of crying and I quickly went about making some coffee to try and calm her down. I hated to see her like this. “All because he doesn’t want to marry me.”
“Savannah, I’m sure that’s not it.”
“But it is!! He buries himself in his work so he doesn’t have to see me. Since I’ve been in New York he’s called me once!! He doesn’t care and I shouldn’t care either!! I should just end it!”
“You don’t mean that Savannah… you love him.” I tried to fix things, but I didn’t realize it wasn’t my place. Savannah and JC needed to fix things themselves. I couldn’t save their relationship.
“But I hate how he treats me.”
“Vocalize how you feel…”
“I’ve tried!! But it’s like his damn fear of commitment is more important than his supposed “love” for me.” She was bitter and angry. Her words came out like poison and I wanted more than anything to prove that JC did love her still.
Again, it wasn’t my place, but I wanted to try.
“It seems to me that there’s a lot more behind this story… and we need to find out.” I held my hand out for my friend, which she gladly accepted. “I will do everything in my power to find out.”
“What do you mean?”
“We have to go to JC’s best friends. The people that knew him before either of us did. I mean… do you know much about JC’s past love life?”
“Honestly… no… he said he’s had some relationships and they ended badly. That’s about it.”
“It sounds like our Josh was burned… Justin’s back…so I guess I’ll try and get information out of him. In the meantime, we need to get in touch with Hope and possibly Tommy. This mystery has to end.”
She nodded her head in agreement but I could tell her heart wasn’t in it. I hoped I could save my two friend’s hearts.
**
“What the…” I screamed out. I had just gotten the biggest shock of my life when I opened the door to Ricky’s apartment. Savannah was busy changing her sheets since Lance had left. She couldn’t very well sleep on dirty sheets!
When Justin and I were together we had to practically change our sheets everyday. Wait! Stop Natalia! No thoughts of the bastard!
The only thing I should be focusing on was that Hope was in the doorway, sobbing.
“Natalia, I went to your house. Your Mami said you were here.”
“Yeah… come in. What happened,. sweetie? Is everything okay?”
“No.” She said hoarsely.
I helped her into the apartment and sat her down on the couch. I called for Savannah who emerged from her bedroom and then practically tackled Hope.
“OH MY GOD! I missed you so much! I’m sorry for not calling, but so much has happened! I have to fill you in on EVERYTHING.” Savannah managed to say it all in one big breath. I just smiled at my two friends.
“We’ll all catch up in a sec. I just want to know why Hope is so upset. Don’t try to lie your way out of it either. I know you too well and I know that you are falling apart.” I said a matter of factly and sat down next to her.
I knew Ricky, Hope, Savannah and Justin better than I knew myself. I could read their thoughts and emotions. I was tuned into them.
If only I could know Justin enough to realize he was cheating on me.
“Tommy… he… he cheated on me 5 years ago!” She sobbed, letting the tears out that she had been trying to hold in since Savannah stepped in the room.
“Oh sweetie.” Savannah and I just hugged her tightly. We didn’t know what to say so we listened.
“How could he do this to me?!”
“Hope, it was 5 years ago. He was in a different place in his life. Don’t hold it against him.” I tried to calm her but she erupted in a fury.
“Hold it against him?! HOW CAN I NOT?! He has a child with another woman! We were supposed to be fucking honest with each other!” She screamed. God, Hope was acting just as I was not too long ago.
I was terrified for her. I didn’t want one of my best friends to go through the hell that I went through and still was going through. No one deserves that pain of losing your one true love.
We didn’t know what to say to that. Savannah and I were left just as clueless as Esperanza was. We just let her vent her frustrations. Hope cursed and screamed and cried.
I wished I could see Tommy at that moment. I would have punched his hit man face in.
I wanted to take her pain into me. I could do it, I survived it once and I would do it again just so my best friend wouldn’t have to do it. She didn’t deserve it!
I didn’t want Hope to become as unreachable as I had become. I knew at that moment it was up to me, Ricky and Savannah to heal our friend. I just hoped we could heal her as quickly as possible.
