“You need to call her,” Sheridan thrust the phone in his face. “It’s not fair to her Justin.”

“She hung up on me,” he grabbed a fist full of popcorn out of the large bowl that rested on the counter. “Obviously, it was too much trouble for her to talk to me then.”

“You were being ridiculous!”

“I wush not,” he said, his mouth full of popcorn. He swallowed before speaking again. “All I asked her…”

Sheridan cut him off. “You crucified her for not giving into you.”

He sat back in his chair and crossed his arms. “I’ll be fine without her.”

“Karen says that you need to call her,” Sheridan nodded, trying to hand him the phone again. “Come on Justin…you’ve held out for two weeks, stop being stubborn and talk to your mother.”

He gave her a dirty look, and then glanced at the phone. He didn’t want to talk to his mother. Calling his mother would mean that he was giving in…it meant that he was agreeing with what she had told him; that this was the best thing for him. Yes, yesterday’s outing with Sheridan had been amazing. So amazing that he felt like less of a freak. But it still didn’t give him the urge to want to call up momma, and tell her that he was sorry he had yelled at her. As far as he was concerned…she was still the one at fault. “I don’t wanna.” He pushed her hand away. “Let’s go watch a movie.”

“You’re calling your mother.” Sheridan informed him. She clicked the phone on. “What’s the number.”

He laughed at her. “Screw that.”

She sighed loudly. “Justin, you’re only making things harder on yourself ya know. If you don’t give me the number, I’ll get it from mom.”

“She won’t give it to you,” he scoffed.

“Try me,” Sheridan smiled.

He felt stupid arguing with her. By now, he should have known better than to try to talk her out of any sort of plan, or idea she had. She was like her mother: demanding and passionate. He knew he could sit there and protest this until his face turned blue…in the end she would obtain the number and end up calling his mother herself. He wasn’t ready for his mother to know about Sheridan yet. He didn’t know how she would react. He held out his hand. “Just give me the phone.”

She smiled, and began to hand him the phone, but then retracted it quickly. “You’re going to call the right number aren’t you? You’re not just going to call your house and talk to your answering machine right?’

Dammit. He hated how smart she was. “You’re just like your mother,” he grumbled. “I’m gonna call Sher…alright?”

She smiled, and pecked him on the cheek. “Good.”

He snatched the phone out of her hand and reluctantly dialed the number, silently praying that his mother didn’t pick up. After three rings he started to become hopeful, but then the familiar sound of somebody picking up the phone ripped through his ears. He cringed.

“Hello?”

It was momma. “Hi,” he muttered, glancing at Sheridan.

She smiled, and took a seat. “Talk to her,” she mouthed.

“Justin?” Lynn replied. “Is that you honey?”

“Yeah,” he grumbled.

Sheridan scowled and pointed to her mouth. “Smile,” she whispered.

He rolled his eyes. “Uh…I was just calling to say hello.”

“You haven’t called in weeks,” Lynn said. “I was beginning to wonder when you would. Karen said you were still upset from our first conversation.”

“I was,” he whispered. He felt terrible. His mothers voice sounded so hollow…so lost. He wondered how much sleep she had been getting, he wondered how many nights she had stayed up, waiting for the phone to ring…waiting for him to call. “I know I shouldn’t have been mom. It’s just been hard…adjusting to all of this.”

“I know it has,” Lynn said, her voice cracking a bit. “And I guess I’m to blame for not really discussing all of this with you before hand. I just…I wanted the best thing for you baby. I’m sorry.”

He rubbed his face with his hand. She was apologizing. She was apologizing for helping him. It just wasn’t right. He glanced at Sheridan. She was thumbing through a magazine. He let a few tears escape him. “Please don’t be sorry momma,” he chocked out. “I didn’t want to understand why you did what you did. Now…I understand.”

“Your father and I have discussed all of this,” she said after a moment. “And come to the conclusion that…if you are really unhappy there, we can try the at home thing for awhile and see what happens.”

His eyes widened. This was his chance. He couldn’t believe it. He could go home…back to his house. Back to sleeping in his own bed…watching his own television…eating out of his own refrigerator. He would have the freedom to use the phone when and where he wanted to. He wouldn’t have to feed another damn horse ever again. “Are you serious?” he gasped.

Lynn sighed. “It’s not my first choice Justin, and you know that as well as I do. But I’m not going to leave you there if you’re miserable. You’re my son…you have to live your own life, and I respect that.”

Sheridan looked up from her magazine just then. She shot him a confused look, as if to say what’d she say? Justin bit his bottom lip. Sheridan. He hadn’t thought about her at all. He knew that if things had been different, and he had called his mother two days before this, he would have hollered “Yes!”, hung up, and been packed already. But this was today…the day after a major breakthrough for himself and Sheridan. He knew that if he left, and went back home…he wouldn’t get to see her again. Sure, he would call…she would call. But sooner, rather than later…the business side of things would take over him again. Being home meant he was fair game again. JIVE would be holding conference calls with him. Johnny, Clive, and countless other people he dealt with would be hounding him constantly. Aside from the therapy he would be receiving at home, he knew he wouldn’t have time for anything else. As always, his career would come first.

He didn’t want to lose her. Not now. “Momma,” he got out finally.

“Yes.”

“I…I don’t think I can come home right now.” He watched Sheridan’s confused expression form into a shocked one. Her mouth hung open…her eyes were wide. He smiled a little.

“Justin,” Lynn chuckled. “I can’t say I’m not happy about this…but it seems a little odd to me. Karen told me that all you‘ve been saying is how badly you want to come back home.”

“I just…I’ve been thinking about what you said the other time. You know, this isn’t the only way to do this,” he smiled, and winked at Sheridan. “But it’s the best way.”

“You’re happy there?” She asked him.

“Yeah,” he said. “Now I am.”

She sighed. “Justin you need to be sure. This is your chance. If you don’t come home now…I’m not going to let you decide to come home a week from now.”

He paused for a moment. Momma had a point. What if his sudden spout of happiness was short lived? What if Karen became even more demanding? What if he had a falling out with Sheridan? He knew momma meant what she said. This was his only chance to get what he had wanted since she left him here. “I…” he began. Sheridan grabbed onto his free hand just then, and stared intensely into his eyes. She wanted him to go…he could tell. He shook his head.

“Please,” Sheridan whispered. “You want this.”

“I’m sure momma,” he said. “And if for some reason down the road I change my mind…I’ll just have to live with it.”

He heard her sigh with relief. “I…I think you’re making the right choice. Please know that.”

He squeezed Sheridan’s hand. “I know I am.”

“Karen says that if all goes well, I might be able to come up there in a few weeks,” Lynn said. “Isn’t that great.”

“Yeah,” he said excitedly. “That would be great momma.”

“She said you should make it a goal. To…walk the full length of those parallel bars. She said if you do that, you can have a visitor.”

He sucked in a breath. That was a lot for Karen to ask. He didn’t know if he could do that any time soon. He hadn’t taken more than a step on that god forsaken device. He tried his best, but couldn’t seem to do it. It took so much energy, and he gave up the moment he fell. Still, Karen was adamant about him mastering it. She put him on that thing every other day…and he knew that now, with this knew goal in his mind, she would want him to try it every day. “I’ll do my best,” he said without much enthusiasm.

“Please do,” Lynn said encouragingly. “I miss you Justin. We all miss you.”

“I miss you too.”

“I’ll talk to you soon honey. Take care. I love you.”

“I love you,” he said softly. He hung up.

“She said you could come home,” Sheridan said after a moment. “Didn’t she?”

He nodded. “She did.”

“But you said no,” Sheridan told him. “I don’t understand. I thought that was what you wanted all along.”

He glanced over his shoulder. Karen was no where to be seen. He kissed her. “That was before…,” he glanced over his shoulder again. “You’re too special for me to just leave behind.”

“Please don’t say that.” She pulled away from him and turned her back toward him. “You can’t see it now…and hell, I can’t either. But I know in the end, this won’t work Justin.”

“Why the hell not?” he whispered harshly. “Damn Sheridan…we haven’t been together for like…a day yet.”

She whirled around. “Who said we were together?”

He didn’t understand her sudden attitude change. “We kissed, remember?”

“So?”

“Oh, so it meant nothing to you then?” he laughed. “Don’t play games with me Sher. Don’t try to make me think that you don’t care…just so I’ll leave. I may be stuck in this chair, but I’m not that fucking naive.”

She let out a long sigh. “This is happening too fast.”

“That’s not what you said yesterday.”

“Yesterday was crazy alright?.” She began to pace back and forth. “I thought I knew what I was doing but now…now I know I should have stuck to my original theory. This isn’t right. I’m a caretaker and you’re a patient and…”

“I know…we can’t be together,” he grumbled. “I should have fucking known better than to mess with you, girl.”

“Justin--”

“Just forget it Sher. I‘m sorry I broke whatever code it is you live by.” He shook his head and wheeled himself away from her. He heard her call out to him, but he didn’t stop. He half expected to feel a tug on his handlebars…but it didn’t come. She hadn’t followed him this time. He stopped. He could hear it. She was crying. “Fuck,” he muttered.

“Look what you did.” Trace was standing before him. This time he was sucking on a lollipop.

How the hell does he get this stuff? He glared at him. “I didn’t do anything.”

“You shouldn’t have done that yesterday. You shouldn’t have brought her to our place. You think like a fucking horny animal when you go there. You know that.”

“Oh please,” he said. “Don’t give me that…you and Elisha used to go up there all the time and do it.”

“I know. But at least I wasn’t in a weird situation with her. Justin, what exactly do you expect to happen with this girl?”

He shrugged. “I like ‘er.”

“Alright,” he nodded, pointing at him with the pop. “You like her. She goes to school in New York…you live here. What’s gonna happen if you two fall in love? She’s gonna leave, and you’re still gonna be here.”

He shook his head. “She wouldn’t leave me like that.”

“Pssh,” he rolled his eyes. “Do you know how hard it is to get into NYU? She probably worked her ass of to get accepted there. She‘s not gonna throw that all away.”

“She could find a great school here. Hell, I’d pay for it.”

“She doesn’t strike me as the type to change her lifestyle for a guy,” Trace said.

“I’m not just some guy,” he grumbled.

Trace laughed out loud. “Look at you man! Still acting like this! Like some fuckin’ god. Pull your head out of your ass man…you’re in a wheelchair for crying out loud!”

He gritted his teeth. Trace was lucky he didn’t’ have something to throw just then, or it would have been aimed right for his face. “I won’t be when that time comes.”

“How the hell can you say that?” Trace whispered. “You’re not even trying to get back on your feet.”

“I am trying,” he seethed. “This isn’t easy for me.”

“What you need to do…” Trace took a step toward him and crouched down to meet his level. “Is forget about the girl…focus on your therapy, and get on with your life. There‘s gonna be other girls…but you‘re not going to be twenty four forever. You know how this business works. You gotta make yourself as big as you can while you‘re still young…remember?”

“Screw. You.” He felt his bottom lip quiver. “Who the hell are you to be saying all this…you’re dead.”

“I’m trying to be a friend.”

He closed his eyes. It’s not real. He’s not really there. It’s all in your head. He opened his eyes again. “Why won’t you leave me alone?” he whispered. “Why can’t you just die?”

“You need me,” Trace snickered. “I know you’re too bone headed to admit to it…but you do.”

“I don’t need you!” he shouted. He balled up his fist. He swung at him. His hand went straight through Trace’s face, as if he were swinging at nothing at all. “Jesus,” he gasped. “What the hell are you?”

He shrugged. “Whatever you want me to be.”

“Fuck…don’t play that shit with me Trace!,” he cried. “You’re dead okay…dead. I know, I was there. And…and when you’re dead…you’re not supposed to come back,” he paused for a moment. “You’re never supposed to.”

“Look Justin, you’re my best friend. And I’m gonna be here for as long as you want me to be here.”

“I don’t want you here,” he said, sobbing a little. “I want you out of my fucking head!”

Trace shook his head sadly. “You know what’s sad?”

He didn’t answer.

“It’s sad that you say you don’t want me around…yet you’re the one who’s keeping me here.”

He looked at him strangely. “What?”

He disappeared.

“That’s right!” he sneered. “Do your famous disappearing act now!”

“Is everything alright?”

He looked behind him. Karen was standing there, a confused expression on her face. Shit. “I…yeah. Sorry.”

“Are you feeling well?” She approached him, and put a hand to his forehead. “Hmm. You’re not warm.” She leaned down and looked into his eyes. “Have you been sleeping alright?”

“Yes,” he whispered. “I…I was just thinking.”

Karen nodded, but he could tell that she wasn’t buying it. “Just let me know if you feel like anything is wrong. It doesn’t matter what it is. It could be emotional…or physical.”

He nodded.

“Sheridan said you spoke with your mother.”

He cringed at the sound of Sheridan’s name. “Yes.”

“That’s good Justin. I’m glad you decided to be mature about all of this.”

He nodded again. She was still staring at him. He knew she knew there was something on his mind. She was right. But he wasn’t about to tell her about it all. About what happened yesterday…about today…about how Trace wouldn’t leave him alone. “I’m okay,” he managed.

Karen simply nodded in approval. “Dinner is in an hour.” She turned on her heel, and walked off down the hall.

Justin groaned. Now she thought he was crazy. Crazy and crippled. But really…why wouldn’t she think that way? Hell it was the truth. Anybody that saw things…or people, like he was seeing Trace had to be crazy. There was no other explanation.

He just wished he knew how to make it stop.

**********

Sheridan was thankful to be out of the house. She was thankful to be away from Justin most of all. She had tried her best to avoid him for the rest of the day. She felt bad about it. She knew she had sent him mixed signals…and now he was paying for it. She felt like she had betrayed him in a way. He had put his trust in her…he had opened his heart to her. Why couldn’t she simply take his feelings for her in stride and try this with him? What was she so afraid of.

She knew what it was.

He would walk again. She knew that he didn’t think he would…but she knew he would. She had seen too many people in his situation. Justin was strong, both inside and out. All he had to do was believe in himself, and he could accomplish anything. He had proven this to both herself and her mother countless times since he had been here. When he walked again…he would become that person again…that celebrity. He would go home, and forget all about Sheridan Williams. The girl he had kissed during a sponge bath. The girl he loved to watch movies and make omelets with. She would just be a faded memory that he would think back on, years from now. She didn’t think she could handle it, and she was sorry that she had ever let herself slip up and kiss him in the first place.

Well, almost sorry. As much as she hated to admit it, she loved the way she felt when she kissed him. She felt warm…protected. When she kissed him, all the pain she kept so well hidden from the world seemed to cease for the moment. In that moment…and only in that moment…she was able to put her father’s death behind her.

Sheridan gasped, and turned off the radio.

It turned back on.

“What the?” Sheridan gasped, quickly switching off the radio again.

“Oh my god,” she said. She pulled the car over to the side of the highway and shut off the engine. What was happening? She sat in silence for a moment. Then she heard it.

“Just stop it.”

It was a voice. A masculine voice. She looked around, her eyes wide with fear. “Who’s there!” she yelled.

“He’s fucked up enough. Can’t you see that?”

She screamed. But there was nobody there. There was nobody in the backseat, and there was certainly nobody in the passenger seat. Was she losing her mind? Were her troubles with Justin burdening her so intensely, that she was hearing voices? “Okay, relax,” she told herself. “It’s late…it’s dark…and you’re stressed.” She breathed in deeply, and then let it out slowly. She listened for the voice again, but it wasn’t there. She checked her wristwatch. She knew she had to get going. Marcy’s flight was landing in fifteen minutes. If she wasn’t there to get her…it was all she would be hearing about on the way home. She turned the key in the ignition with a trembling hand, and pulled back out onto the freeway. The radio didn’t turn on, and she began to convince herself that it had just been her mind playing games with her all along.

Radios didn’t just turn on by themselves.