It's been awhile. A long while. About seven or eight months. I didn't block or force anyone or music genre's out of my life. I simply lived my life. I spent most of my time at school, doing classes and working at the bookstore. I got back into playing the piano, I took up a few clubs, and I volunteered. Between hanging out with Chris and a visiting Celeste, who was in the process of moving to LA, I kept pretty busy. I was surprised to find out just how well I could live my own life and still keep in touch with my, now globally famous, friends. Well, most of them, that is. I know I kept myself so busy because I didn't want to think about anyone named or sounding like, JC.
Sometimes it worked. Most times it didnt.
Justin and I spoke to each other frequently. Though we were now both twenty, it felt like we were teens all over again. He was the only person who I would be on the phone with back in those days. The feeling was great since we did let ourselves grow apart for awhile. It was nice to come back together and build a stronger bond. I hadn't seen Justin in flesh and bone for such a long time, all I had were magazines and television to remind me of how he looked. It seemed the guys were all going through hair changes again. You can only imagine my face when I saw that Justin was no longer my Curly anymore. That was one phone call I'm sure he wished he never answered.
The whole mystery woman thing died down eventually. But, oh not with some crazy stories to go down with it. I personally called Britney, and explained to her that nothing had occurred. Did I have to do that considering what Justin's suspicions were? Nope. Why did I? Because as much as I loved Justin, I genuinely wanted what he'd been hearing to be false. I don't know a person who'd want their friend to have a broken heart. Justin merely mentioned in a print interview, that the
hotel room belonged to a family friend and her mother, the other guys vouched for him. Even JC.
JC.
I hadn't spoken to him since Challenge For The Children. Last year. I didn't blame him for not wanting to speak to me. Lord only knows what Bobbi told him to make him believe Justin and I were having an affair. Though, seeing as how he's still WITH Bobbi, it was none of his concern who I chose to spend my time with. I didn't extend the phone-line to talk to JC, either. Still, ignoring each other only makes seeing each other that much more difficult. We're obviously too stubborn to care, though.
I had things I was still working on sorting out. I wanted to rebuild myself before I encountered JC again. Never did it cross my mind that finally "being" with him would make me feel so low. I almost started to feel like JC didn't understand or feel what I did, the way Justin did. I was close to believing that five years apart really was a lifetime.
2001: Lying is AWESOME, until you get caught
"You have to."
"No way, Justin."
"Zahra, I am not asking you. You're coming, end of discussion."
I let out an annoyed sigh and smacked my hands down into the mattress. He's such a bossy dictator sometimes. "This isn't fair."
"You know how many fans would kill to come to ONE our studio sessions? You're being invited to TWO and saying it's unfair. I want you to come, and you will."
"Yes, Daddy," I sneered.
"What YOU don't know is that I quite enjoyed being called that just now," he joked.
I scoffed and laughed. "Fine, I'll come with you, okay?"
"I know you are, I already said it," he responded.
"You can't just pick me up and throw me over your shoulders to make me go you know," I said.
"Yes, I can, and I will do it if I have to, don't let me resort to it," he warned.
"Ughhhhh! You're treating me like I'm a child!"
"Hey, hey, don't make me call your mother," he played along.
I snickered. "Whatever. When are you guys flying in?" I asked.
"Pretty late, around 2 am," he replied.
"I'll be there."
"We'll have a truck there, but I think it'll be okay if I ride with you. Are you sure you even wanna be out that late?" he asked.
"Trust me, I won't be sleeping. Every time you tell me you're on an airplane, I worry myself into a fit."
"That's exactly why I would never tell you and you'd be surprised when we popped up. Anyway, we're about to board. I'll call you when we land."
"Alright, bye J. Have a safe flight, give everyone my love."
"Will do, bye."
I hung up my cellphone and took my television off mute. I was watching a marathon of Disney movies on HBO. I couldn't envision a better way to kill time while I waited for that call. I took a few deep breaths and assured myself they would be fine.
I don't know why I volunteered to even go to the airport. It would be my first time seeing them in months, and I was nervous to see JC. I was hoping I could just stay in my car, but I wanted to see the rest of the guys, too. We had some catching up of our own to do. I couldn't let whatever animosity JC and I had interfere with the flow of things. Although, I'm pretty sure someone had to notice we weren't speaking to one another.
JC was also the reason why I didn't want to go to the studio. It'd just be him, Chris, and Justin because I think Joey and Lance were filming for a movie or something. Which, them being gone would make things even more uncomfortable, I'm almost sure Chris and J were gonna go off and wreak havoc when they got a break, leaving me and JC alone. Whether I went to the airport or to the studio, I couldn't evade JC any longer. I had to face him and I think I'm finally ready to. Maybe things won't be as bad as I think they will be.
A few hours later.....
I shot up from the couch as I heard my phone go off. I quickly rubbed my eyes and sat up straight before grabbing my phone.
"Yeah," I answered.
"We've landed and we're safe," Justin said.
"Sweet, I'm on my way."
I ran upstairs to put on a hooded sweatshirt and a pair of sneakers. I stopped in the bathroom to splash some cold water on my face. My hair was already down, so I simply combed it out, then headed out the door. I didn't care that I was wearing pajama pants, mostly because I knew the guys wouldn't care.
I could feel my nerves rise as I neared closer to LAX. I pulled into the parking structure and and shut off my car. Before leaving to cross the street into the airport, I took a few deep breaths, swishing my bangs out of my face. Okay. I can do this. I've done this before. I
am woman. I felt my knees get wobbly once I was on the other side of the double doors.
I saw a tall figure approaching me and I could feel my emotions coming to the surface. What can I say? It's been months. I knew it was Justin, because I could spot that smile anywhere. Once he was standing right in front of me, my jaw dropped wide open. No really, my jaw was wide open. He looked beautiful and gorgeous at the same time.
"Are you gonna just stand there or are you gonna hug me?" Justin smiled.
Instant puddle of goo, I was. I threw my arms up around his neck and he lifted me into the air, hugging me tightly. Oh my GOD, those arms. He was so tall and handsome, all toned with muscles. He even had a little goatee. No longer was he my sweet, innocent Justin, but a man. Who was in this body? Damn.
I ran my fingers over his shortened hair cut while pulling away from his embrace. "Wow, I can't even believe this is who I'm looking at. Are you SURE you're Justin Timberlake?"
He playfully rolled his eyes. "Of course, are you sure you're Zahra Camden?"
I pursed my lips, shooting him a sideways glance. "Don't play, I'm in my pajamas. I look like a total train-wreck."
"I beg to differ," I heard behind Justin. I leaned over to my left and saw that the rest of the posse had caught up. I gave my hugs to Joey, Chris, and Lance, but I hadn't seen JC. Before I could even turn to ask:
"Yo, where's C?" Justin asked Chris.
"I dunno, probably still getting his bag," Chris replied.
"Nah, there he is, he's coming," Joey said.
I watched from behind Joey as JC came closer to us. I simply stood there, feeling all the nerves I had bomb me at once. JC now, was a complete 360 from the JC I last saw. His hair was a little longer, and straightened out with blonde highlights. He was sporting a strip goatee, and he looked like he packed on some toned muscles to that slender frame of his. I watched as his electric blue eyes wandered while he was nearing the distance between himself and us. JC's eyes eventually settled onto mine; it was hard to read his expression. Maybe it was shock. I don't think he was expecting to see me at all.
"Hi," JC said to me.
Ah. So I was right, he wasn't expecting to see me. It was crystal clear he wasn't happy about it, either. "Hi. Justin, let's go, please."
"Oh whoa, where's HE going?" Chris asked.
"I'm riding with Zee, you wanna come?" Justin asked.
"Uh YEAH, duh. Smell you later, dorks," Chris said to the others.
I saw a mixture of confusion, anger, and hurt on JC's face. But I was more focused on wanting to get out of here. I damn near ran out of the airport. I didn't want any type of awkward, negative energy to follow me. JC had every intention of making sure everyone knew he had a vendetta against me. Whatever. As far as I'm concerned, I did nothing to him. Justin and I have never slept together, and really only came close ONCE. How many close calls have I had with JC? Enough for me not to mention it at all. Especially since during those times he was someone else's boyfriend. My mistake.
"What was that about?" Chris asked me once we were all packed and ready in the Jeep.
"What was what about?" I asked.
"You and JC," he replied.
"I don't know, nothing."
"Bullshit," Justin chimed in.
"Um, you stay in the passenger seat, this is between me and the backseat," I said.
"Shut up," Justin smiled. "No one's blind. It's obvious JC is still upset about the hotel room thing. How many more times can I say nothing happened? Did I look like I just had sex or something?"
"So he's mad at you, too?" I asked. I purposely ignored the latter of his statement. Those words alone were too much to deal with in one car trip.
"He's mad at everybody," Chris sighed. “I thought asked you to fix things."
Shut up, Chris! I know that triggered an alarm that was going off in Justin's head right about now. He was going to start asking questions and questions led to the truth. I can't lie if I have to tell the truth, CHRIS.
"Shh!," I said sternly. Maybe it slipped past Justin's radar. I hope it did.
"Wait, what'd you tell her to fix?" Justin questioned.
Okay, so it didn't. I should hope for a million dollars, because it's apparent if I hope for it NOT to happen, it does anyway. Oh this is going to be grand.
"Nothing," I answered.
"Hell nah, stop with the secrets guys, come on," Justin said, switching between looking at me, then Chris.
"Okay, look," Chris began.
"Chris, don't you dare," I warned.
"Tell me, Chris," Justin said.
"Justin, stop it," I said.
"What? Why can't he tell me? Since when have you two been so buddy-buddy enough to share secrets?" Justin asked. Dude, if he only knew about me and Joey or me and Lance. We're definitely buddy-buddy enough.
"He can't tell you because it's none of your business!" I replied.
"Chris, tell me or I'm reaching into my box of Kirkpatrick secrets and sharing."
"You. Wouldn't," Chris said.
"I. Would."
Chris groaned. At that moment, I knew my secret about Montez, was going to eventually make its' way out. Whether I wanted it to or not. Lying was bad, but why did it have to slap ME in the face. I lied for a good reason. At least that's what I thought.
"Sorry Zee," Chris apologized. "When we were leaving Orlando after tour rehearsals, I asked her to fix things so you and JC wouldn’t be mad at each other."
"What are you talking about, JC and I weren’t mad at each other," Justin defended.
"Are you serious? For like two or three days during the last week of rehearsals, you guys wouldn't even look at each other onstage," Chris said.
"Oh yeahhh. Hold up, wait. That wasn't because of Zee. At least not entirely."
"What?" Chris and I asked.
"I told JC to do something about his girlfriend hanging around and causing trouble. I told him not to ask her back because she and Zahra already had problems. I didn't say those words exactly, but that's what I meant. He took it the wrong way and we got into an argument," Justin explained.
"Ohhhh," Chris and I said.
Hey! That means I have a fake boyfriend for absolutely no reason. Well it's not like any of them gave a flying fuck or two about me being with Montez, anyway. They each made that clear in New York. Very clear.
"All of you guys thought we were mad at each other because of Zee? No, not all. Well now, he's mad at me because of Zee," Justin explained. JC sure made THAT clear this time. "I don't know why JC would be jealous anyway, it's obvious who the favorite is," he remarked.
I shot my head in his direction, ready to ask him what he meant by that, and then I didn't. Chris was present and I didn't want to have "that" conversation at the moment. I could tell by the way he uttered his last sentence he tapped into a jealousy of his own. The silence was going for fatal awkwardness. I began to reach for the radio...
"I don't think that's true, J. You guys have all been friends for a long time, she has a different relationship with you, just like you
have different one with JC than you have with her. It's not better or worse, just different."
Saved by the Chris. He redeemed himself that quickly? He also explained it the way I saw it in my head. Making me feel a lot less crazy. Wow, gotta love that guy.
"I guess you're right, Chris," Justin said. Yes, he was right. "But still, how'd you fix things?"
Seriously? Face. Palm. Even Chris didn't know how I fixed things. No one knew, especially not the person involved, Montez.
"I didn't." Back to the lie.
"You're a liar, and a bad one. Geez, at least if you're gonna lie, at le-- OH! You lied!" Justin shouted.
"What in the hell are you talking about?" I asked.
"You lied to us about having a boyfriend, didn't you?"
"No! Not exactly?" I shrugged.
"I can't believe you! How could you lie about having a boyfriend? Does this Chris Montez guy even exist?" he asked.
"Yeah, he exists, just not as my boyfriend. We are really great friends, though," I explained.
"Why did you say that then? Why'd you lie?"
"Chris told me about you guys at rehearsals. I didn't want to be the reason for your friendship being ruined. I wanted to make everything better. I thought that if you guys knew I was seeing someone, you wouldn't have the thought wrapped in your head that I was with the other," I told him.
"That obviously didn't work," Chris said.
Pfft. You have NO idea, Chris.
"All this could end very simply Zee. Just make a choice. Decide who it is you truly want," Justin said.
You have no idea, Justin.
2001: How To Solve Conflict
I woke up to a buzzing alarm. I wasn't a happy camper. Sleep was ridiculous, I tossed and turned all night. To be honest, I had no idea why my alarm was even set, it's Friday and I never have classes on Fridays. I'd love to give this magnificent reason for why I couldn't sleep, such as Justin and Chris knowing I don't have a boyfriend, or finding out that Justin feels JC is my favorite. But, unfortunately, my only reason for no sleep was JC. It wasn't anything positive, either. He really hurt my feelings last night.
I really tried to understand why my alarm was set, and especially set for 12:30 PM. OH, the studio. Wow, I'm gonna need to get some cold water on my face, I'm very delirious. Without hesitation, I stripped off my clothes and walked into my bathroom to get in the shower. I spent as much time as I could sleeping standing up, before finally being completely awake.
Wait, that's not the truth. As I was walking back to my room, my eyes kept snapping close. It wasn't smart, but I went "Weekend at Bernie's" as I walked into my room. Screw the studio, I'm going back to sleep. There was no point in going where I wasn't welcomed by everyone who would be there.
"Nice towel."
Am I dreaming or did I hear Justin? I opened my eyes, knowing I had to be crazy. I was ready to drop my towel until the reflection in my mirror scared me half to death.
"AHHHHH!" I screamed. "What the hell?!" I walked over to him and slapped his thigh.
"Ouch! I said nice towel!" he laughed.
"What are you doing here, how'd you get in? You can't be sneaking in through my window, you criminal," I laughed.
Justin made a face at me and flipped me off. "JC let us in."
"Oh, so you're talking, now?" I asked, surprised.
"Yeah. Now, he's just mad at you," he joked.
"He can keep being mad, I'll have the locks changed. Why does he still have a key anyway?"
Justin looked up and snickered. Um, what's funny? Did I miss my glorious punchline? I was serious. If JC was so high and mighty, he could at least give back the keys to my house.
"Because your mom said I could keep it."
I turned around, rolling my eyes in the process. Speaking of high and mighty, look, it's King Joshua. All petty and unworthy servants, locksmiths, and merchants, bow down to hail thee. I was definitely not in the mood for JC and his drooling eyes right now.
"Am I not allowed to have privacy in my own room, now? Everybody get out."
"Bu--," Justin began.
"Out! Get your butt out!" I said.
"I see a nipple!" Justin shouted as I slammed my door shut. I heard Justin cackling down the stairs. What a liar, he didn't see anything.
I took my slow time putting on my clothes: a mini t-shirt, dark blue jeans, and a pair of Jordans. What was JC even doing here? I walked down the stairs and made my way to the kitchen. Justin and JC were sitting around the counter, eating and talking. Oh?
"So you're eating my food, too? How sweet of you," I quipped.
"Zee," Justin began. I saw the tight-lipped look on his face and rolled my eyes. Sorry, I'm not walking on eggshells for JC after months of being ignored.
"What?" I asked, raising my eyebrows.
"Chill, that's what," he snapped.
I scoffed and swatted him away. Now he's siding with JC? Is everyone forgetting who the culprit in all this is? I picked up the bag of chips that were laid on the countertop, and began to snack.
"You don't have to tell her to chill. If Zahra has something to say to me, she can say it. Whatever," JC spoke up.
My fuse was officially blown to bits.
"Oh really? Is that so? Great, let's talk about why you've been acting like such a god damn dick for the past couple of months. You waltz into MY house after ignoring me and blatantly giving me the finger in front of everyone last night? Fuck you, JC."
The looks on both JC and Justin's faces were filled with surprise. Yeah. I said it. That's right. I had so much anger toward JC that I let sit inside me and marinate for far too long. I was through with it.
"Fuck me? Okay," JC said.
"Yes, fuck you. And I can guarantee you that if I WAS sleeping with Justin in New York, he wouldn't have left my hotel room at all. Oh yeah I'm sorry, I'm only allowed to be the side girlfriend to you and Botchy, my bad."
"Zah-- wait really?" Justin said mid-sentence.
"Shut up," I said. He pouted his lips and stuffed a chip into his mouth.
"Know what Zahra? You're full of shit. You prance around like the innocent angel, when YOU'RE the one playing with me and Justin. Don't act like you're all mature and crap, when you can't even tell us the truth about having a boyfriend. Some friend you are."
I immediately shot Justin a death glare and he looked away. He's dead. SO dead. "I did that for you. For BOTH of you."
"Yes, because you're so fucking arrogant, you'd automatically assume that if me and Justin aren't speaking, it's because of you," he spat.
"Arrogant? You're the one that's completely selfish. Everything is about you. How long have you been screwing with my emotions?" I was about tear JC a new asshole, and I'm only getting warmed up.
"Alright, that's it. Stop it," Justin said. "I'm only gonna say this once. Both of you get your shit together. We're about to go to this studio and I'm ready to work. I do not wanna hear this when we're there. Sit on opposite sides of the room for all I care, just leave it all at the door. Got it?"
Unwillingly JC nodded, and Justin looked over at me.
"I'm not going," I said.
"Don't make me resort to what I said I would," Justin warned.
I rolled my eyes, standing up. "Whatever."
If it wasn't for those boyish good looks and nicely sculpted muscles, I'd kick Justin right in
his left shin.
Story Tags: friendsturnedlovers mmcera firsttime tourj nsasync tour jealous triangles roommates hotel otherwoman debutsync presync tourjc jc justin friendswithbenefits cheaterjc
