“Stop that.”  Justin pulled Bailey’s hand away from her mouth.  She had been furiously chewing on her nails all morning.  “You’re going to make yourself bleed.”  He chided softly.

“Sorry.”  She slipped her fingers through Justin’s to keep her hands busy.  She was nervous, though, because she’d let her son go off with her ex who happened to be an ex-con, as well.  It wasn’t the easiest moment of her life.

“He’s going to be okay, Bailey.  You made the right decision, letting him have this day.”  Justin used his free hand to tuck a strand of hair behind her ear.  He smiled at her, his eyes warm and comforting.  They were snuggled up next to one another on Justin’s couch, while Carter and Travis spent the day together at Bailey’s house.  It was her only stipulation to their visit, because she didn’t want Travis taking Carter anywhere.  She didn’t trust this stranger.

“I know.”  Her words escaped on a sigh.

Earlier that week, Carter had come to her with a list of Pros and Cons, and he’d sat his mother down at the kitchen table.  “Mom, tell me about your dad.” 

“Gramps?  What do you want to know?”  She was surprised by his comment, only because he already knew a lot about Red.

“I want to know why he was a good dad.  I want to know what he did for you.”  He pointed to his paper.  “I’m making a list, so I can figure out if I should see Travis again.”

Bailey swallowed thickly, trying to clear the lump from her throat.  “Well, I think this situation is a little different than my relationship with your Gramps.”

Carter took a patient breath, causing his mother to smile slightly.  He was obviously not getting what he wanted out of his mother.  “I know that.  I mean…” he glanced down at his list.  “Why do I need a dad?  I’ve got you.  Isn’t that enough?”  Suddenly his twelve-year-old face was that of a little boy, not a teenager.  His blue eyes implored her, begging for an easy answer to a question he’d been asking his entire life.

“Bub…”  She reached out to him, grabbing his hand.  Tears were threatening to spill, but she blinked them back.  “You and me, we’ll always have each other.  You are enough for me, Carter, always.  I love you more than anything, and we will always make things work out the best we can, just like we’ve always done.”  She took a deep breath, unable to believe she was about to give her son this piece of advice.  “But having a dad is very different that just having a mom.  There are a lot of things that a dad can give you that a mom can’t.”

“But, I have Justin for all of that.”

Bailey’s smile was watery.  “Yes, you do.  And he loves you very much, too.” 

“So, I don’t need to get to know Travis.”  He pushed the pad of paper away from him, his decision made.

“Carter,” Bailey sighed, still having trouble forming words.  She wracked her brain, hoping to find a way to express her thoughts and still make sense.  “When I was a little girl, my mom died.  And my dad, Gramps, he did the best job he could raising me.  And most of the time, I was absolutely fine without a mother.  I had my grandparents around, and I had aunts that were constantly checking on me.  But there are certain things that I could only learn from my Mom.  Like…like, the traits I’d inherited from her, or my family history, or advice that moms give their little girls.  I know you have Justin and he adores you, but…I don’t want you to ever regret not getting a chance to talk with your father.”

Carter watched his mother carefully, sliding the pad of paper back over and penciling in a few new notes.  “What if I don’t like him?  Or…or what if he doesn’t like me?”  His voice was small and Bailey’s heart went out to him.

“You don’t have to do anything you’re not ready for, Carter.  I’ll support any decision you make.  Don’t worry about anyone else but you.  Okay?”  She gently pinched his cheek.  “And everyone loves you.  It’s just a known fact.”

Her son smiled ruefully.  “Okay.”

A day later, Carter told Bailey his decision to give Travis another chance.  He said he thought that talking with his dad was probably a good idea, and he had some questions to ask, anyway.  So, Bailey set up a meeting, making sure that Travis knew he couldn’t take Carter anywhere without her being present.

So here she sat, in Justin’s living room, worry keeping her from truly enjoying his company.

“Okay, you were more animated when you were biting your nails.”  Justin’s voice brought Bailey back to the present.  “You’re making me feel like I’m a really boring boyfriend.”

Bailey shook her head slightly, turning to give Justin an apologetic smile.  “Sorry, I’m just worried about my little boy.”

“Do you want to call and check on him?”  He reached to the table beside him and grabbed the phone.  “It’ll probably make you feel better, and then maybe I can get some attention.”  His grin said he was joking.

“Yeah, actually, I do want to call.”  Bailey grabbed the phone, dialing her home number and finally relaxing when she heard her son’s voice on the other end of the line.  “Hey, Bub.”

Justin watched as Bailey talked to her son, the worry melting off of her features as Carter assured her that everything was going just fine and that he was okay.  Justin still had to wonder how he’d gotten here, to this point in his life, but he knew he wouldn’t change anything.  Even though things were awkward because of everything with Travis, Justin was still happy to be with Bailey.  She was interesting and fun to be around, and she was such an independent woman.  It was refreshing to be with someone that didn’t constantly need Justin around for entertainment.

Most of the women he’d dated were looking for him to take care of them so they could get married, have babies, and be stay-at-home Moms.  That wasn’t what Justin wanted.  In fact, he’d stopped dating all together because the women around town scared him too much.  It was a little strange to be with someone who already had a son, but Carter was an incredible kid and Bailey had her shit together.

Well, other than having to leave her home town because she was threatened by drug dealers, and having her ex-boyfriend baby-daddy track her down after spending over ten years in prison. 

Other than those things, Bailey had her life together and Justin liked that about her.

She made him happy.  She kept him on his toes and made him feel completely comfortable at the same time.  He was falling into this relationship easier than he’d expected too, and he was okay with that.

If only he could get her to pay him a little attention today.  She was nervous, he knew, and she was obviously concerned for her son.  But still, she was here with him, and he could think of a hundred other ways that they could be spending their day together.  He watched her as she said goodbye to Carter, smiling over at him.

“He’s good.  He said it’s going well.”  She handed Justin the phone.  “Thank you. I needed that.”

Justin grinned over at her, cupping her cheek in his hands and kissing her softly.  “I know.”  He kissed her again, this time deepening it.  He scooted forward on the couch, pulling Bailey into him with his other arm.  She responded, wrapping her arms around his shoulders and pulling at his curls.  Gently, he teased her mouth open with his tongue.  She let him in, letting out a soft whimper when he nipped at her lips with his teeth.  “Maybe we can take this somewhere else?”  His breath fanned across her face.  He couldn’t stand to have his lips away from hers for long.

As an answer to his question, Bailey stood from the couch and headed toward Justin’s bedroom, giving him a coy look over her shoulder.

Yes, Justin could think of hundreds of different ways to be spending their day together.  .

~*~

His mother had always told him to be polite.  She heavily enforced the rule that rudeness was unacceptable, and Carter tried his best to stick to her rules.  He didn’t want to disappoint her.

But, he was bored out of his mind.

Travis was so nervous and anxious; he couldn’t seem to get out of his own way.  They were in the back yard, playing ball, and Travis sucked.  Really, Carter was trying to be nice, but it looked like the guy had never picked up a baseball in his life.  Carter obviously didn’t get his athletic ability from his dad.  The older man had no idea what to talk about, he couldn’t seem to relax, and he kept staring at Carter as if the boy might disappear.  It was really awkward.

Carter had weighed the pros and cons of knowing his father.  It was still a difficult decision, but he ended up deciding to give Travis a chance.  Carter wasn’t in the market for someone to step in a play Daddy; he had his mother and he was content with their small family.  He did, however, know that he would someday regret not giving the man a chance. 

There was also the small worry in the back of Carter’s mind that wondered if Travis would cause trouble for them if Carter said no.  He didn’t want to leave Shelby Forest, not now.  Travis was holding their future in his hands, and Carter was hoping he could convince the man to leave them in peace.

“I think I need a break, kid.  I’m too old for this.”  Travis took of the glove and shook out his hands, searching them over to check for bruises.  Carter removed his own glove, trotting over to fall in step beside Travis.

“You’re not even forty yet.”  Carter commented, looking the man over.  He looked a lot older than he should; now that Carter thought about it.

“Yeah, well, twelve years in prison will do that to a person.”

There was a slight pause, but Carter couldn’t hold his question.  “What was it like?”

Travis cleared his throat uncomfortably, climbing the porch and taking a seat in one of the chairs.  He looked at his son, gauging how much he should share.  The kid was so much bigger than Travis had anticipated.  He was really expecting a little boy, a toddler.  Even though he knew that Carter was almost a teenager, he still had trouble believing that he had been away for that long.  His son was a stranger, not a little kid.

“It wasn’t an experience I want to wish on anyone, Carter.”  He settled further into his chair and closed his eyes.  “It’s something I wish I could take back every day of my life.”

“Why?  Why did you leave mom?  She told me that she asked you to quit, and that you left her alone.”  There was anger in the boy’s voice and Travis knew he deserved it.

“I was selfish.  I thought I could make a lot of money and get out whenever I wanted.”  Travis settled his eyes on his son, seeing the life he missed.  “I loved her, Carter.  I loved her so much, but I was young, stupid, and selfish.  It’s not something I’m proud of.”

Awkward silence hung over the porch like a heavy rain cloud.  Both Carter and Travis were lost in thoughts that they didn’t have the words to verbalize.  Travis wanted to apologize and find the right way to take it all back.  He wanted to relive the years they all lost while he was away, and he wanted to show his son that he wasn’t a bad person.  He felt lost and helpless.  It wasn’t how he’d envisioned his life going at all.

Carter was just unsure of everything.  He wanted to protect his mother.  She was obviously upset by Travis’ unexpected arrival in their lives, and Carter was worried about what it all meant.  He didn’t want to move again.  He liked where he was; he liked Justin, too.  If Travis wanted to, he could make all of their lives a living hell.  It was unsettling.

“Are we going to have to move again?”  Finally, the boy voiced his thoughts.

“What do you mean?”

Carter took a deep breath.  “If people back in Boston find out where Mom is there could be a lot of trouble.  Are we going to have to move again because you know where we live?”  Blue eyes crashed together as the young man stared the older one down.  “Are you going to tell people where we are?”

The question took Travis by surprise, and he really didn’t know how to answer.

“Well, I…”  He stopped, not sure how to answer the boy’s question because he didn’t know why he was here. 

Carter stood up from the porch, wiping his hands down his jeans.  “I’m going to call my mom now.”  He left Travis sitting alone on the porch, heavy with thoughts.