“Boys!”

I cram some more of Davey’s stuff into his suitcase.  It’s been a headache, getting them ready for this trip.  It’s their first one since they’ve been here, and they’re both so excited that they haven’t been able to tell me what they want to bring versus what they don’t.

I feel like I’m they’re damn mother.

Fuck, I’m as good as.

It’s okay though.  It’s working out, for everybody involved.  Me being here gives the boys the stability they’ve been seeking since their parents passed away.  Each day, Davey is starting to speak up more and more.   Soon, we’ll need to start looking into schools for him.  Francine says that we may want to look into a special school for children like him.

I talked to Justin about it.  Naturally, he wouldn’t hear of it.

“He’s not stupid,” he huffed last night after I put the boys down.  “He’s been through something, but he’s coming out of it now.  He can go to school like every other kid.”r32;

“We all know he’s not stupid,” I rolled my eyes as I began to pick up some micro machines from the floor, left behind by the boys earlier in the evening.  “It’s just that...he’s been through a lot.  Sticking him in a regular school right now could be bad for him.  He needs to take slow steps, you know? Be around people who understand him.”

“How is that supposed to make him stronger as a person?” Justin said, following me as I walked into the kitchen.  “If we baby him his whole damn life, he’ll be weak when he gets older.  He won’t be able to fight his own battles.”

I dumped the toys into a small bin I kept handy underneath the sink, and turned back to him.  Justin was leaning against the kitchen island, his arms crossed, his gaze defiant.  He didn’t want to budge, but neither did I.  “I think Francine would know what’s best at this junction,” I informed him.  “Come on Justin, I know this isn’t about him being weak.  It’s about taking a blow to your damn ego.”

“What? Come on!”

“It’s true!” I yelled at him.  “You just can’t stand the fact that your little brother isn’t as perfect as you’d like him to be.  It’s the same way with Austin, only...he can talk, so you just demean him to the core when he breathes the wrong way!”

It was silent after that.  I wasn’t surprised.  I’d proved my case, and he was quickly realizing it.  He knew he was making Davey’s issues about himself, that he was slipping back into the ego maniac I’d met that first day at my job interview.  

“Abbey...” he sighed and ran a hand through his hair.  “I just...I just want the best for them.  I want them to have...what I couldn’t have when I was their age.”

I stared at him long and hard.  I knew his feelings were stemming from someplace deep inside of him, that he still hadn’t revealed to me completely.  What Justin didn’t realize though, was that the boys didn’t care about the things he could give them.  They just wanted him to love them, to give them every part of him.  He was doing that with me, giving himself to me.  He seemed to have an easy time with it actually...especially in the bedroom.  But the boys...sometimes, when I would think he was on the brink of a breakthrough with either of them, he would retreat back into himself, frightened of the bond they’d began to form.  I didn’t understand.  “They don’t care about the material shit,” I huffed.  “They...”

“It’s not about material shit,” he grunted, cutting me off.  “It’s about them being civilized, acting like fucking human beings instead of transients.  I want them to be normal.”

Normal, as in the perfect representations of himself.  Perfect little Justin droids who had no personality.  The idea disgusted me.

I realized it was the first time in a great while that we were having a serious argument.

I wanted to stop, because I hated being angry with him, but my feelings about the subject were so strong, I couldn’t do it.  “Davey needs special education,” I told him, bluntly.  “I’m sorry Justin.  I am.  I’m sorry your parents were killed and that he was in the car with them.  I know it puts such a damper on your fucking agenda, having to live with his issues.  If you want, I’ll make sure to keep the situation on the down low.  Wouldn’t want you to be fucking embarrassed.”

He gave me a dark look.  “I have enough shit to deal with, without you shoving this in my face, Abbey.”

“It’s my job to shove it in your face,” I grunted.  “Or did you forget that, because you’ve been too busy trying to get me in bed?”

He wouldn’t look at me for a moment, and when he finally did, the most he could seem to do was glare at me and stomp off to his bedroom without another word.  It was asshole Justin at his finest, and I was fuming.  I wanted to burst into his bedroom and call him every vulgar name under the sun...

But at the same time, I knew there was more behind his emotions, so I decided to let him cool off.

He’d been acting strange since the day he played golf with Donald Trump.  I wasn’t sure why.  I asked him if the deal fell through the day after he played, figuring he’d be more up to discussing it with me.  He told me that it hadn’t, but he wasn’t exactly sure what was going to happen.  His eyes were filled with sadness when he told me that.

He was hiding something.

But I wouldn’t pressure him to tell me.  It wasn’t my place.  It was business and while I berated him for telling me that exact same thing at dinner the previous evening, I knew I really had no place discussing his work with him.  I wasn’t there every day, I didn’t know what it took to run a billion dollar corporation, so...I figured it was better to leave well enough alone.  Justin was brilliant, and I knew he would be able to solve his work issues without my help.

But now it’s Friday, and he hasn’t seemed to cheer up much at all, despite the fact that we’re leaving soon.  He just walked through the door a short while ago, on time, as promised.  When I said hello, he only forced a smile for me, and got right on his cell phone. I just don’t know what to make of his mood.  Are we even going to have a good time this weekend? Or is he just going to make my time and the boys time a living hell?

I’d set him straight in the car, but unfortunately, we’ll have company.  The kind of company that will make me slip my headphones on and stare out the window until we arrive at our destination.

I loathe the fact that Trace and his bitch girlfriend will be in close proximity to me for almost four full days.  I tried to get out of it, tried to tell Justin I wanted no part of it.  But then he handed me that song and dance of ‘oh, I want to spend time with you.’  It melted me at the core, and when he mentioned the boys...how he wanted to bond with them as well, I was done for.  It was so sweet, hearing him say that.  I couldn’t back down.  I knew I had to suck it up.  It was a real chance for the four of us to become something...more.  For Justin to open up to me completely, for the boys to be able to look up to him like they never had before.

Backing out of it, would have been a crime.

“Boys!” I yell again.

This time they come running in.  Davey’s lips are smeared with chocolate, and I frown.  He’s been in the cookie jar again, when I told him he wasn’t allowed anymore before dinner tonight.   “I told you no more, Davey,” I say with my hands on my hips.

“I just...I just wanted one more,” he explains bowing his head low.

How the hell can I be mad at him now?  

“Abbey I can’t find my iPod,” Austin groans.  “Did you see it?”

“You mean this?” I pull the thing out of my pocket and toss it on the bed.  “You left it in the bathroom yesterday,” I huff.  

“Sorry,” he says it softly, and takes it back.  

“Hey.”

Justin knocks on the side of the doorframe, and smirks a little as he begins to remove his tie.  “You guys almost ready? I’m going to change real fast and then we can go.  Quincy is waiting out front.  Abbey, those are my bags by the door right?”

I slam the last of the boys’ suitcases closed and zip it harshly.  “We’re ready,” I grunt.  “And yes, those are your bags.”

He cocks his head a little, confused.  “You...okay?” He chuckles.

“Austin, take Davey and go down to the car,” I say, ignoring Justin’s question.  “Go on, Quincy will be there waiting.”

Austin looks to me, then to Justin, and back to me once more before nodding a little, and dragging Davey out of the room by the hand.  I’m sure he can sense how annoyed I am tonight, and while I hate to bring that kind of an attitude around the boys, I just can’t help myself.  Between Justin’s mood, trying to prepare the boys, and knowing I’m going to have to be as nice as I can to Trace Ayala, I just don’t have it in me to calm down at this point.  

“Hey, what’s up.”  Justin steps into the room, the concern apparent on his face for the first time in days.  I think he’s only just realizing how stressed out I am.  His mind has been in another place for entirely too long.

“Nothing, I just want to get moving.”  I grab the boys suitcases and haul them off the bed.  “Go on, get changed.”

He stands in front of me and crosses his arms.  I roll my eyes.  “Move, Justin.”

“Not until you tell me what’s wrong with you,” he says quietly, and yanks the suitcases out of my hands, tossing them behind me on the bed.  

“You’ve just...you’ve just been in the crappiest mood since Wednesday!” I shout at him.  “I mean I know...I know we had a nice dinner and a nice walk but half the time I felt like you weren’t even there with me.  Now, you won’t talk to me, you won’t tell me anything.  The fucking phone has been shoved in your ear at all times! What the hell happened? I thought...I thought things were getting better.”

Damn, that felt good.

He stares at me, and then looks down at the ground, letting out a harsh sigh.  “I told you, it’s just business.”

“It’s affecting you here at home, so it must be something bigger than that,” I point out, with a strong, angry glare.  “You can’t fool me, Justin.  Not anymore.”

He looks off in the opposite direction and shakes his head.  “And if I tell you, then what? What’s it going to solve?  Not the issue, I can tell you that much.”

“Oh yeah,” I scoff.  “And hiding your issue from the world is a much better plan.  Just forget it, all right? I’m fucking sorry that I care.”

I start towards the bed, to retrieve the suitcases that have been strewn across it, but then he grabs me by the upper arm and gently pulls me back over to him.  I tug away harshly.  “Don’t,” I mutter.

“Look it’s...,” he pauses, sighs and looks down for a moment before returning his gaze to me.  “There’s an issue at work.  A big issue, with money.”

I just stare at him.  “Did the market crash or something?”

He chuckles.  “No, but if it had, I’d probably be taking it a lot better than this.”

He’s not angry. He just seems very...let down, as if somebody has ripped his heart out and stomped all over it.  I know it’s not me.  I mean, I’m still here, trying to help him through his problems.  But if it’s not me, then who?  “What happened?”

“You can’t say anything, to anyone,” he says softly, as he touches my face lightly.  “We’re still trying to figure out exactly what’s going on.”

I shake my head.  “No, I won’t say anything.”

“It’s...it’s Trace,” he says, his voice beginning to quiver.  “I had a meeting with my accounting team yesterday morning.  I never, I never checked into his accounts, you know? I never had to.  But I was tipped off, so I decided to have them run some reports on them.  Abbey....there’s almost a million dollars unaccounted for.  That money belongs to our investors.  I...I don’t know what I’m gonna fucking do.  I know how Trace is.  He’s too smart to make a mistake like that, so the only thing I can figure...is that he’s been skimming.”

His shoulders sag in defeat and he covers his face with his hands.  Jesus...I...I had no idea. I mean, this is huge.  I may not like Trace, at all, but I know how much his friendship means to Justin, and now he feels like Trace has deceived him in the worst way he possibly could.  “How can you find out for sure if it was him?” I whisper, rubbing my hands up and down his back as I pull him close to me.  

“I talked to the FBI today,” he whimpers.  “They have to do an investigation.  Trace doesn’t know.  He thinks everything is fine so...I need you to be with me this weekend, and try to act like everything is normal.”

“You mean he’s still coming?” I scoff.  “Jesus Justin!”

“What can I do!” He exclaims.  “He’ll know something is up otherwise.  They told me that he could flee the country if he catches on...fuck...”  He shakes his head again, like he can’t believe what he’s saying.  “How could I be this stupid? How could I not see it?”

“It’s not your fault,” I tell him, sternly.  “Justin, he’s your partner.  You trusted him, and...and you never know, it might be somebody else...”

“He’s been in trouble before.  I just didn’t know it,” he blurts out.  “He was granted immunity because he testified.  I found that out.  He...he and some other guy took like three million dollars from Merrill Lynch awhile back.”

“Why would he need to steal though?” I ask.  “He has money.”

Justin becomes very silent, as if he’s thinking about it very hard.  “I...I don’t know.  I’ve thought about that.  He could have some problem that I don’t know about...gambling or drugs, although I think I would know if it were drugs.  I just didn’t pay enough attention.  I hole myself up in my office most of the time, I let Trace supervise most of the operational aspects of the business.  I thought it was working out, and now...now I’m going to look like a fucking fool.”

“I’m sure if you just explain the situation, the investors will understand,” I say, sympathetically.

“No.”  He tugs away from me harshly and lets out a long, miserable sigh.  “They won’t understand.  Goldman Sachs...we’re supposed to be the most reputable investment firm in the world.  Our clients get pissed if they lose a thousand dollars through us, and now they’ve lost a million? Our good name...everything I’ve killed myself to change about the way the company works, is going to go right down the drain, and there’s nothing I can fucking do.  Nothing.  Even if I pay them all back out of pocket, they’ll never trust us again.”

I don’t know what to say.  One, he knows this business better than I ever will, and two, there’s nothing I can say or do that can fix what’s happening.  I feel terrible about that, and even worse that I got angry at him for not wanting to tell me.  Now that I know...I wish I didn’t.  The weekend has just turned into a horror show for the both of us, and I have no idea how we’re going to go about it normally.  “Justin...”r32;

“I’m gonna change,” he says, his voice full of misery.  “Just...meet me at the car.”

I let him walk away, staring at the empty open doorway for several minutes after he’s left me alone.  I try to think of the best thing I can do at this point, to make the situation any better.  I guess the only thing I can do is smile, hold my head high, and try to keep the boys and Justin isolated from Trace and Sydney whenever I can.

Yeah, because that’s going to be real easy.

I feel more pressure on my shoulders now more than ever, as I get into the elevator with the last of the suitcases, and make my way downstairs.  Frank, the doorman, greets me and wishes me a fun weekend in Southhampton.  I really like him.  He always knows what’s going on here, always makes small talk with the boys, especially Davey even though he doesn’t talk back. I make it a point to be pleasant and tell him to have a good weekend as well.  I pause right before I reach the limousine, knowing that Trace and Sydney must be inside of it by now.  Justin told me earlier today that they were meeting us here.  I have to turn my fake side on.  It’s hard to do...because I’m not a fake person.  

But I’ll do it for Justin.

Because now more than ever I realize that I’ve fallen in love with him.

“Miss Abbey,” Quincy smiles and takes the bags for me after he opens the door.  “Ready for some fun in the sun?”

I laugh a little.  “Lying on a sandy beach sounds great compared to cleaning up the kids toys.”

“Then you make sure you do that.”  He winks and smiles as he leans in a little closer to me.  “And you two behave yourself, if ya know what I mean.”

I stare at him, feeling my cheeks begin to burn.  

Obviously, he can tell something is going on between myself and his employer.

“Quince...”

“Ah, I gotta get the bags in the trunk.”  He says quickly, and motions me to get inside the limo. 

I just shake my head, knowing it’s a cop out, but given the circumstances of things, I know it’s better if I just do as I’m asked for now.  So I get in the car.  The door closes behind me.  I take a seat next to the boys, and glance out the window for a moment, before looking straight across the limo.

“Yeah, what? No...no I said I wanted a hundred shares...yeah, get it right you idiot...I’m not paying you to sit around with your thumb in your ass...”

Trace is on the phone.  I feel a wave of nausea sweep over me.  My gaze lands on Sydney next.  She’s snapping her gum and flipping through her issue of Cosmopolitan Magazine, large, gaudy sunglasses resting over her eyes, one arm draped over her daughter who is fast asleep at her side.  She doesn’t have a care in the fucking world as she sits next to her felon of a boyfriend.  She’s a pampered spoiled princess, and as long as she’s getting what she wants, I’m sure she doesn’t care about where the money is even coming from.

I wonder if she has any clue what’s going on.  If Trace would tell her what he’s doing.

“Abbey can we make a sandcastle?”

I turn to Davey.  He’s smiling just a little bit.  I reach out and run my fingers through his soft brown hair.  “Sure, anything you want.”  I smile, but it’s not forced.  Not for him.

“Can Justin help?”

I kiss his forehead.  “I’m sure he can.  Make sure you ask him though, okay?”r32;

He smiles a little wider.  “Okay.”

“Abbey, I want some fruit snacks.”

Austin takes my attention next.  “Coming up.”  I pull my backpack onto my lap and begin to dig through it.

“I want some too,” Davey says.

I just chuckle a little bit.  Shit, at least they’re keeping my mind off of the situation for the time being.  I dig and dig through my bag, find at least a dozen different toys and games that wouldn’t fit into the suitcases, but I don’t find my emergency snack pack.  I groan, knowing I probably left it on the kitchen counter.  Damn it, it took me two hours to balance out all the food categories in that thing too.  “Guys, I think that...”

“Hey.”  r32;

The limousine door has been opened again, and Justin is getting inside now, taking the last available seat right next to me.  He throws a plastic ziplock bag filled with snacks down into my open backpack and smirks a little.  “You forget that?”

“I...”  I stare down at the ziplock bag for several moments, before looking back up at him, my mouth hanging open slightly.  I’m shocked that he would have even taken the time to notice the stupid thing, or realize it was something that I needed for the weekend.  “How’d you know?”r32;

He leans in, without thinking, and kisses me gently on the lips.  “Because I know you.”

Everybody is staring at us.  Hell, Trace has even gotten off his phone call, due to that little move.

But Justin doesn’t get embarrassed, doesn’t pull away from me or act like he’s done anything different from what he normally does around me.  He remains completely calm,   drapes an arm around me, smiles at his “friends,” and then digs his blackberry out of his pocket with his free hand, beginning to focus on it’s screen rather than everybody else in the limo.

I glance at the boys.

Davey is giggling, his eyes bright and full of joy.

Austin looks like he doesn’t know what the hell to do with himself, and I feel like I’m going to get hit with the repercussions of this from him the next time we are alone.

But I won’t focus on that now.

Trace is staring at me as the limo pulls away from the curb.  It’s a warning look.  A look that’s telling me I don’t belong with Justin.  That I have no business being this close to him.  I’d tell him exactly how I feel, exactly how much of a scum bag I think he is, but then I remember what Justin told me.  That we have to be in this together, treat Trace normally so the investigation goes as planned.  I smile at him.

He grunts in disgust and looks away from me.  Soon he’s back on the phone again, and Sydney goes back to her magazine, as if nothing ever happened.

I like it better that way.

It’s a two hour car trip, and the boys begin to get restless within the first twenty minutes so I pull out their portable DVD player and make them watch a movie.  It seems to calm them down, and I’m glad because I could tell they were beginning to irritate Justin as he was doing some work on his laptop.  About an hour into our journey, Kristy suddenly wakes up and says that she needs to use the bathroom.  Sydney automatically makes Quincy stop at the first rest station she sees.

Wouldn’t want her little princess to be deprived of anything, of course.

It feels good to get out of the car and stretch.  The boys run around and chase each other while Kristy goes off to the restroom with her mother.  I let them run amuck, because there is another hour left of travel time, and I’m hoping that they’ll nap for the rest of it, since their movie is almost over.

“Hey, can you go in and get me a protein drink?  The kind we have at home?” Justin pops out of the car suddenly and hands me a twenty.  “I’m just...right in the middle of something on the computer.  I’m sorry.  Get yourself whatever you want.”

I look at him and sigh, but can’t help but smile.  “Yes, sir.”

He just rolls his eyes at me and shoots me playful smirk as he gets back into the limo.  That’s okay though.  It means his mood has calmed down somewhat.  That he’s pushing the situation out of his mind so we can have a good time.  I head into the convenience store and search for Justin’s Muscle Milk, surprised when I find it in the very last cooler.  The guy really does know his shit, that they’d have it here. But I figure, he must stop at this same spot every time he takes a trip to the Hamptons.  

“So, what was that about?”

I turn around slowly, pray it’s not Trace, even though I’d know his voice anywhere.  I stare at him for a moment, pick at the plastic seal on the bottle I’m holding in my hands.  “What do you mean?”

I walk past him, and begin to survey the juice selection in the next refrigerator.

“You know what I’m talking about.”

I feel him right behind me.  I don’t turn around.  I’m liable to slap him across his face if I do.  “If Justin hasn’t explained it to you yet, I’m not going to either.”

“You really think he cares about you, huh?”

I pull a couple of Apple Juices out for the boys and an iced tea for myself, before I start to walk down the aisle.  I can still hear him following closely behind me, his breath heavy, and full of anger.

“Hey, I’m talking to you.”

His hand is on my shoulder, and I whirl around, pushing him back harshly.  “Don’t touch me,” I snap at him.

“Look, he might be happy fucking you every night for now,” he tells me, in a low whisper.  “But it’s a temporary thing.  You better not think that you’re going to come first over business. I won’t have it.”

“Really? Hmph,” I stroke my chin, making myself look deep in thought.  “Last I heard, Justin could run his own life.”

“You’re the hired help,” he grunts in my face.  “Maybe Justin got caught up with you because you’re always around and you can’t afford to leave.  Hell, it’s probably better than him running around with these skank female executives he keeps meeting.  But you should understand that you’re nothing to him, you’re vapor.  Somebody he can get off with at night.  You could never really be with somebody like Justin.  You have no place in a group like ours.  You bring nothing to the table because you’re just...common, and you better watch your step, because I’m going to be there to put you right back in your place the minute you start to get too needy.  Got it?”

On the inside I’m in a rage, ready to kick his ass, tell him that I know exactly what he’s doing behind Justin’s back and that he’s going to go to jail once the FBI gets the evidence that they need.  But on the outside I’m calm, because I know I have to be.  I can’t let Justin down, because he’s counting on me.  “If that’s how you feel.”  I say it pleasantly as I shrug and smile at him.  That’s all I do, because I know it’s the one thing that will make him feel like an idiot the most.

“You stupid, stupid bitch.”

I make sure I laugh, and that I don’t turn back around as I go to pay.  He bangs his way out the door when I put the drinks down on the counter, and I know...I know I’ve gotten the best of him, even though he was certain that things would work out differently when he came inside to confront me.

Still, I’m shaking slightly now.  It was scary that he was so close to me, talking to me like that, threatening me.  I have to snap out of it though.  I won’t tell Justin.  I don’t want to think about what he’d do at this point, and with three children around, nobody needs to be swearing or attempting to punch each other.

“Miss, are you all right?”  The man behind the counter asks me as he rings up my items, as if he just saw that entire episode.

“Oh, yeah,” I chuckle lightly as I take the bagged items that he hands to me.  “I’ll be fine.”  I walk out and head back across the parking lot.  Trace is nowhere to be seen, and I’m sure he’s back inside the limo, arms crossed, gazing out the window like he’s the most pissed off he’s ever been.  Good.  I’m glad.

“No, Aus...like this.”

I look off to my right when I hear Justin’s voice, and I feel the smile break out across my face immediately.  Somehow, the boys conned him into getting out of the car.  Davey is off to the side playing with a toy car, and Justin is holding the soccer ball in his hands as Austin looks up at him, seemingly in awe.

“You gotta keep your legs way up and watch the direction of the ball.”  Justin tosses the ball in the air and bounces it from knee to knee, expertly, as if he plays soccer every weekend.  

“But I can’t do it that fast!” Austin pouts.

“You will, buddy,” Justin laughs as he catches the ball in his hands and tosses it back into Austin’s arms.  “We’ll practice okay? Together.”

“Really?”

Austin says it lightly, as he continues to stare up into the face of his older brother.

Then I see something I never thought I would see.

“Yeah, of course.  I’ll...I’ll teach you so you can be really good when you play.”  Justin crouches down and nods slowly.  “Maybe...maybe tomorrow you and me can take a walk on the beach or something.  Just us.”

“Why,” Austin whispers.

“Because.”  Justin looks down at the ground for a moment, before placing a hand on each one of Austin shoulders.  “I...I never get to talk to you, you know?”

Austin just nods his head a little, like he doesn’t know what to say.  I’d expect that of him though.  The fact that Justin is making an effort is just...so, so huge to him.  I feel the tears creeping up into my eyes, and it takes everything in me to hold them back.  Then I see Justin hold his arms open to him, and it takes Austin a moment or two, but he races into them, and wraps his arms around Justin’s neck, tightly, as he lifts him off the ground.  He strokes the back of Austin’s hair, and rubs his back, before his eyes open again...

And he finally sees me standing there.

“Go on,” Justin smiles as he puts Austin back down and ruffles his hair slightly.  “Go get settled with Davey.  We’ll leave in a minute.”

Austin takes his brother by the hand, and glances at me slightly, before flashing me that playful smile I’m so used to seeing on Justin’s face, and heading back to the car.

“Here.”  I approach Justin slowly and hand him his drink out of the bag.

Justin nods, and smirks slightly.  “Thanks.”

“What was all that?” I ask him softly, a knowing smile on my face.

He shrugs.  “I just...saw them with the ball and thought I’d show Austin some stuff, as long as we were stopped.”

“No more laptop?” I chuckle.

He laughs, and I can see the tears come into his eyes quickly before they begin float down his face, and I know his mind is focused solely on his brothers rather than on Trace or the business right now. “He needs me,” Justin says quietly, as he rubs the tears off his face.

“I know.  They both do.”

He comes close to me, and touches my face for a moment, before he pulls me to him.  “I need you, Abbey,” he whispers.  “I...” he trails off, like he can’t say it.

Part of me knows what he was about to say too.  But I won’t wait for him to say it, because I just...I just don’t know if he’s ready to.

So I kiss him instead, with everything in me, not caring that the boys, Trace and Sydney are most likely watching.  I just don’t care.

I love him.  I must.  Nobody has ever made me feel this way before...not even Braeden, as much as it hurts me to say that.  I’ve found somebody a step up from him, somebody that gets me through and through, and I get him.  I get him right down to the core, even if he hasn’t told me everything that plagues him inside just yet.

And I’m never letting him go.