I’m sure most people would think I broke down when he proposed, cried into him and said, ‘yes, yes I’ll marry you Justin.’
But, that kind of thing only happens in faerie tales or really cheesy romance novels. I figured he was so overcome with emotion that he would have said anything to me that night, because he was so happy that I was back in his life, so happy that I loved him and was ready to start over. Hell, he wanted to resign for the sake of the boys and our relationship. That was a huge decision, and I didn’t want him to rush into getting married to me at the same time. I wanted him to be absolutely sure that getting out of Goldman was what he wanted, before he did anything else.
So I told him that I wanted to get married but...that I thought we needed time to consider our options and figure out what we really wanted to do before we rushed into anything. The last thing I wanted to do, was make another mistake. I’d learned from experience that it was very bad to rush into a commitment as big as marriage, and I refused to put Justin through more heartache.
He hated my answer then, but now that he has a better idea of how things are going to work, I know he’s grateful that I knocked some sense into him.
Although, none of it stopped him from planting a big, fat, diamond ring on my finger.
I look at it everyday, knowing it’s too much for somebody like me. Braeden’s diamond was a chip compared to this. It’s from Tiffany’s, has three stone setting, with a four carat diamond in the center. The band is platinum, and has diamonds going all the way around it too. Justin designed it himself, and surprised me with the ring a month after we got back together, while we were at dinner. I didn’t even want to put it on, because I was so overwhelmed at the grandeur of the thing. But he was whining like a little kid, telling me that he spent weeks coming up with the design and his ‘one desire in life’ was to see it on my finger.
He’s so melodramatic sometimes.
But I love him, so I wear it with pride. It really is breathtaking. I get stopped and questioned about it all the time. They all tell me they love the way the stones are set, and ask me who designed it. It makes me smile, because Justin is that good.
Unlike last year, Christmas and Thanksgiving weren’t very eventful. I made sure the boys had a tree, and gifts on Christmas Day, but other than that, Justin and I didn’t find the time to plan a nice dinner or decorate the house. We were too busy moving me out of my place and back into his on the weekends, since our weeks were packed between work, the boys...and well, getting the romance back into our relationship. It made me slightly sad, but I knew things wouldn’t be that way forever.
Next year, I’m sure, will be much better.
The only thing that matters right now, is that we’re together.
After a ton of discussion, we decided to wait a year to get married. Well, more like I decided. I know if I left it up to Justin, we’d be getting married next week. It’s better this way. We can plan the wedding we want while giving ourselves some breathing room. Justin wants to go all out for this of course, have the five hundred person guest list, eat off thousand dollar place settings, drink out of priceless imported antique crystal...you name it, it’s on our ‘must do’ list. I’m not...into all of that. He knows that. He knows that I like to make things simple and enjoyable enough for everyone. He hates that too, so...he’s decided not to accept it. He’s made it clear that we’re going to have a kick ass wedding and I’m going to have to ‘deal with being spoiled’. I hate when there’s a fuss made over me, but there’s no point in trying to change Justin’s mind. We’ve already picked the venue, The Plaza on Fifth Avenue, and hired the best wedding coordinator in the city. She’s all about making our “special day” the “event of the year.” We’ve had two meetings with her already. Justin loves her, naturally, says she’s going to do a great job.
As for me, I want to gouge myself in the eyes whenever she pays us a visit. She doesn’t just laugh, she fucking cackles. I roll my eyes at Justin whenever she does that. He just smiles at me, and continues to act professional, but is quick to make fun of her later on, when we’re in bed. He’ll imitate her laugh during sex...
I hate that it makes me laugh.
It’s not that I’m not excited. It’s our wedding...and I love Justin. I love him with all my heart, but I guess...I guess I was with Braeden for so long and got so used to ‘making due’ that I forgot about the type of lifestyle Justin lives. He’s so damn privileged, and no matter what, he’ll never accept anything other than the best when it comes to his life...the boys, and me. I guess I should snap out of this funk that I’m in, start having fun and putting in my two cents with the wedding coordinator. Justin keeps telling me we have a year, and that I can make the planning process fun for myself if I put some effort in. He says that it’s not fun for him, making all the choices by himself.
But what the hell do I care if the chandeliers come from Austria or France? I’ll take American made for two hundred, Alex.
If I can, I’ll leave the detailing to Justin. He’s just...better at it. I mean, I just want to get married without all the fuss. Is that so much to ask?
The bright side of this? Our problems are minimal outside of the wedding planning. I think Justin and I are more in love now than we’ve ever been and our physical relationship is stronger than ever. Our sex life is at another level. It seems to be everything rolled into one...passion, fun, and love. I know it’s corny, but, at times, I feel like our bodies were made to love each other. I said it to Justin once, and much to my surprise, he agreed.
I’ve come to find out that he’s turned into a little bit of a sap, something he vowed he would never be.
I love it. It makes him that much more adorable, but I can tell he doesn’t want his secret getting out to the rest of the world. I’m fine with that too. I like that we can have a private, personal side to our relationship that nobody knows about.
I thought we were like a family before everything happened, and I guess we were...but now, it’s just like...we’re complete, the four of us. Justin makes it a point to be home for us. I can’t even remember the last time he had to work late, or attend a business meeting. He’s all about the family now, and I know the boys are better because of it.
They were never happier when I moved the last of my stuff back into the penthouse, and quickly turned back into the two boys that I remembered. I still remained at my job for that first month after I moved back in. I thought I could do the work and still be there for the boys, because I was enjoying the firm, and didn’t want to leave. But then I would find myself getting caught up in a project, causing me to stay later and later. It meant I was missing more and more of the boys time after school. Even though Justin was there a little after five each night, and kept telling me not to worry about it, that he wanted me to keep working if it was what I wanted, I just knew I couldn’t do both.
The boys were more important. They depended on me so much, so I gave up my short lived career, telling myself it was the right choice.
It’s been okay. I don’t mind staying home. Most of the women I knew before I moved away are still around, and they tend to fill up my mornings and afternoons before the boys get out of school. Of course, there’s a piece of me that’s slightly bored, but I force myself to ignore it. One day, when the boys are older, I’m sure I’ll be able to get a job again.
That’s what I keep telling myself, anyway.
Shawna and I have managed to maintain a good friendship even though we don’t work together anymore. The day after our little double date, she practically jumped me as I walked into our office, and dragged me to Starbucks. I laughed at her while she asked me a thousand different questions about myself. It never occurred to me that she cared so much about my past, and what had happened in my life. I found myself telling her about Braeden, about how I came to meet and be with Justin, and...what made us break up. She understood, didn’t act like Charlene and so many other people in my life did when I told her I had to leave Braeden behind. The only thing she kept telling me was that she thought I was brave to give up so much to be with Justin, and that she admired me for it.
She’s still with Trace, too. It’s the end of March now. That’s almost six months that they’ve been together. I guess...he considers her his girlfriend now. Justin told me that he does...that they have a cool relationship and that she’s great with Kristy. How anybody could deal with Trace for that much time is beyond me, and I’ve asked her what she sees in him. She just laughs and tells me he’s not as bad as I think he is.
I stay out of it.
Trace and I will never be friends. Just casual acquaintances at best, even though he’s Justin’s best friend. I wish I didn’t have to say that but...I can’t be friends with somebody so ungrateful.
I mean, all this shit has happened, and he still hasn’t thanked me for getting him vindicated. The most he’s done is backed off of Justin when it comes to our relationship, but if he didn’t, I think he knows I’d kill him at this point. I already have enough people in my life that don’t accept us as it is.
I didn’t want to tell my parents about the engagement, but Justin insisted on it. He told me that he knew I would want them at the wedding, and even though I hated it, I knew he was right. I didn’t want to get married without my family there. So...I called them, a few days after Justin and I had that conversation. I was sick to my stomach as I listened to the phone ring...nervous as hell.
I hadn’t spoken to them since I moved back to New York, and I knew...I just knew they wouldn’t accept the fact that I was back with Justin, and engaged all over again.
My mother wouldn’t even speak to me once I told her.
My father, on the other hand, decided to be a little more logical.
“Abbey, do you really think getting engaged is the right thing for you?” My father asked. “You just signed the divorce papers a few months ago. You need to give yourself a chance to breathe.”
I was thankful that he wasn’t yelling, but at the same time, I could tell he was disappointed in my decision. “We’re not getting married for a year, daddy. I just...love him. I never should have married Braeden. Can’t you just look past the divorce and be happy for me?”
“It’s hard honey. So much has happened. I’m just...not sure how much your mother and I are willing to be involved in this. I can’t stop you. I’m not trying to. It’s your life but...I don’t think I can tell you what you want to hear. We might have to skip this one.”
It took me less than a second to realize he was being serious.
I had to hang up, because...I was so hurt.
There I was, finally happy, and my family wanted nothing to do with my engagement.
“It’s a lot for them, that’s all.” Justin rubbed my bare shoulders and kissed my neck as he said it to me that night in bed. “Everything that went on last year, was more than most people have to put up with, normally. They weren’t ready for the news, but...that’s okay. The wedding is a year away. They’ll come around.”
“They don’t want any part of us. You know how my family is. They stick with things. If they don’t like this now, they won’t like it in a year. We...we might as well not even have the wedding.”
“Hey.”
He pulled on me slightly so I would turn and face him.
“Justin...”
“Look, regardless if they come.” He paused and kissed my lips tenderly. “We’re having this wedding. This is about us, Ab. I know...your family is a big deal, but...you me and the boys are what’s most important right now. We’ll make the best of the situation, like we always do. After the crap we’ve put our relationship though, don’t you think we deserve this?”
I stared into his eyes. They were so full of life, and energy, even in the dark. He was going to marry me, love me, and I was going to love him. He had so much faith in us, and I felt bad for making the wedding all about my parents. The truth was, it wasn’t about them at all. The wedding was a symbol of our love for each other, and the family Justin and I had created. “Maybe we can just go to Vegas instead.”
“What? So Elvis can walk you down the aisle?”
“The boys would probably think it was neat.”
We both laughed, and I realized how ridiculous I was being. I was just...scared though. I was scared that if my family didn’t accept us, nobody would.
“We’re staying right here,” Justin told me. “I’m proud of us. We’re not going to skulk off and get married like we’re ashamed of ourselves, Ab. I’ll get you through this thing with your parents. I promise.”
I knew he meant it. Every word. I hated to think that my relationship with my parents was becoming non existent, but I knew as long as I had Justin, I would be able to overcome anything. He would be there for me. He would be my whole family if he had to be, because besides the boys, I was his only family. It only started to hit me then, that Justin wouldn’t have any other family at our wedding. There would be no mother/son dance, no father to give Justin a final pep talk before we took our vows.
He was going to do it all on his own.
I started to feel really terrible about that, and he...he hadn’t even mentioned how he felt about it. I knew him though, and I knew he was sweeping his feelings under the rug so I would continue to be happy. I hated that, but at the same time I was too scared to ask him about it. The last thing I wanted to do was make him remember the regrets he had about his parents, so instead, I let him have his way with me in bed that night, over and over again.
It was one of the most intimate nights we ever had.
Two days later Justin held a press conference, telling all of New York, and the rest of the world, that in a years time, he would be stepping down from his position as CEO. I was dumbfounded, completely shocked that he went through with it. I didn’t know what he was going to do, although...he seemed to have a pretty good idea. He was already making plans to start up his own business, weeks before he made his official announcement. He wants to open his own chain of financial planning firms, and knowing how Justin works, his dream will become a reality in no time. Everything the guy touches seems to turn to gold, and I know that owning his own firms will give him more time to do the things he wants, without compromising his career. That’s great, because I think if Justin stopped working all together, he’d become so stir crazy that I’d want to strangle him.
He told me as soon as he lays out the ground work and begins to gather employees and a solid client base, he wants to start teaching me about the stock market, so we can work together. I’m not so sure if I want to get into it. I don’t think I’d be good at telling people how to spend their money, and I told him that...but he seems to think otherwise. He thinks I’m very persuasive, exactly the type of person he wants working with him. He says we’ll be partners.
I’m still not sure if I’m cut out for it.
But we have a year before anything happens, and hopefully he’ll reconsider. Although, he’s stubborn as hell, and when his mind is set on something, he almost never changes it.
I flush and cough a little as I stand up straight again. Thank God I made it to the bathroom. If I’d tossed my breakfast up in front of Dalton and embarrassed Austin, he never would have forgiven me. I’ve been stomach sick for the better part of a week. Nothing seems to be helping. I’ve been sleeping a lot and trying to hide it from Justin so he won’t worry. I know he can tell something is up with me though. I pick at my dinner when I would usually devour it, especially on the nights that we go out or Lucinda prepares my favorite foods. He’s been caught up with work this week, thankfully. It’s made him slightly too busy to completely focus on my ailment.
I’ll be fine.
I find my phone on the coffee table. Justin’s left me a text telling me he’ll be late for our lunch date, but that Trace is on his way to get me, and we should order without him. Great. I mean, I already feel sick as it is, and now I have t put up with Trace’s arrogance on top of it. Justin is going to pay for this later.
“You ready?”
Trace was nice enough to forget to knock and has simply opened the door with his own key. Fuck, that scared me. I wish Justin would let me change the locks on him, but he refuses. “What if there’s an emergency?” He’ll say. Yeah, Trace is definitely somebody I’d want around in a fuckin’ emergency.
Jesus, I’ve been so bitchy this week. I’m so thankful that the boys have school. I hate to bring this kind of an attitude in front of them.
“Yeah,” I finally say to him, my voice sounding weaker than ever. I grab my purse and sling it over my shoulder. “Thanks for knocking.”
He shrugs. “I have a key.”r32;
“Still.” I roll my eyes and slowly walk over to where he’s standing. “It’s more for emergencies.”
“Fine. Sorry, Christ.” He holds his hands up in a surrender motion as I begin to squeeze past him and out into the hallway. “You all right?”
“Fine.” I nod as I get out into the hallway.
“You...you’re really pale, Abbey.”
Crap. I can’t tell him. If I tell him I’m sick, he’ll only tell Justin, and because Justin is the biggest worry wart ever, he’ll want to rush me to the doctor, and honestly, I’m not in the mood today. “I’ll be fine,” I sigh. “Can we just go?”
He just stares at me, a knowing gaze in his eyes. It’s so irritating . “What’s the problem?”
“It’s just...I don’t know if you should be going out. You look like you just puked your life up.”
“If I was sick I would have told you.”
He laughs slightly. “No you wouldn’t have.”
“I just want to go.” I storm past him and walk towards the elevator. “Come on. Justin’s late as it is.”
“Whatever.”
I reach the doors and press my hands against the wall as I lean against it. I’m so tired. Tired and nauseated and I should be laying down. But damn it, Justin has been busy this week, and getting to go on a lunch date with him is a special treat for us, even if Trace has to come with us.
The doors ding open.
I can’t move. It’s like my legs are made of lead right now.
“Abbey.”
I feel his hands on my shoulders.
I groan like some weirdo.
“Are you sick? I’ll call Justin.”
I turn to him. Everything is fuzzy. He’s still talking but...I can’t even understand him. It makes me laugh, because I like him better this way.
Then I fall to the ground, and the light fades to black.
****************
Beep.
Click.
Woosh.
My eyes flutter open. The room is bright white, and there are machines, and a big wooden door. The bed has rails, and it smells like bleach in here. Hardcore.
I’m...in a hospital? I try to sit up, but I’m so weak...the most I can do is move my head around.
“What...wha...”
“Hey.”
I glance to my right. Trace is sitting in a chair next to the door, magazine in his hands, staring at me with a worried gaze.
“What happened?”
“You fainted,” he laughs.
“Glad you’re amused.”
He shrugs. “You should have been paying closer attention. You’re so damn naive. That’s your problem.”
“What’re you talking about?”
“When’d you stop taking the pill?”
This conversation has just reached a new level of awkwardness. “What the fuck...”
“Look, they took a blood sample from you on the way to the hospital,” he huffs as he flips the pages of the magazine. “They found out what’s wrong with you.”
I don’t even care. The last person I want to tell me something like this, is him. “Where’s Justin?”
“On his way. He was in Brooklyn with clients, and on his way to the restaurant, which of coruse, was in the opposite direction from the hospital. He’s caught in traffic.”
I sob a little. “What the hell is going on?”
“You really want me to tell you?”
“Yes! I mean, am I dying, Trace!”
“No,” he snickers. “Not quite.”
“Then what? Did I eat something bad? I mean, I’ve been feeling sick all week. I just blew it off as nothing but now, now I’m lm like blacking out and...”
“Calm down,” he says, interrupting my babbling. “You’re not dying and you don’t have food posioning. They said that you just haven’t been eating enough, because you didn’t know...um...this is real fucking awkward...” He trails off and runs his hands through his hair. “They said you’re pregnant.”
My mouth drops open, and I start to tremble. No way. He’s lying.
He has to be.
I...I can’t be pregnant. I mean well...I can but...I’m not ready to be. “Don’t lie to me.”
“That’s not something I’d lie about.”
The door bangs open then, and Justin races into the room, desperate to get to my side. His arms immediately encircle my body, and I hug him, but my gaze remains fixed on Trace while I hold Justin in my arms. I can tell by the look that’s on his face that he’s completely serious.
Holy fuck.
“Are you okay?” Justin whimpers, as he kisses my face and runs his hands through my hair. “Abbey...fucking God...”
“I’ll be okay,” I reassure him, feeling the tears spilling out of my eyes.
“What’s wrong with you? Did they say anything?”
I can’t answer him at first.
“Trace.” Justin looks back at his friend, who is still sitting in the chair. “What’d they tell you?”
“I um...” He gets up and takes a deep breath. “I need some air.”
“Trace!” Justin calls after him.
But he just leaves and the door bangs shut behind him.
Great. Fucking asshole leaves me to fend for myself. I want to be pissed at him like always but...
But I guess if it wasn’t for him, I’d be a lot worse off at the moment.
Justin stares down at me, panting harshly, tears pouring out of his eyes. His face is bright, bright red. He doesn’t know what he can do for me, and he’s about to hyperventilate.
I gotta tell him what’s going on before I give him a heart attack. Only, I have no idea what he’s going to think. Is he ready? I guess it doesn’t matter, because this baby is going to come either way.
“Justin it’s...it’s not a bad thing.”
“Not a bad thing!” He plops down on the edge of the bed and continues to stroke my face and hair. “Trace said you just...you passed out in the middle of the hallway!”
“Justin...shh.” I reach out and stroke his face, sniffling my tears back as best as I can. “I’m going to be okay.”
“What’s wrong with you,” he whimpers. “Abbey...I...whatever it is, I can help. I can get you the best docotors...I’ll do whatever it takes to get you better.”
I feel myself smile, for the first time realizing that...that I’m going to have his baby.
We’re going to have a baby. While it’s a shock, completely unexpected, I know it’s a beautiful thing.
I know that he’s the only one I want to have a child with.
“Justin...” I trail off and press my lips together, trying to suppress my giggle. “I...I’m pregnant.”
His eyes widen, and the blue color of his eyes grows even more intense. His breathing starts to regulate itself again, and he caresses my face with a slightly trembling hand. “Pregnant?”
“Yeah.” I nod, feeling my smile growing wider.
“Pregnant.” He smiles and sucks in a breath before he leans down and kisses me powerfully on the lips. “I...I can’t believe...we’re having a baby?”
He’s laughing heartily, and I take the opportunity to pull his face back down to mine, kissing him even more powerfully, trying to thank him. Thank him for the gift he’s given me. “We are daddy,” I laugh.
The tears continue to float down his face as he gently smiles at me. They’re tears of happiness, and I know he couldn’t be any happier about this news. “I guess we should push that wedding date up huh?”
“There’s your excuse I guess. Lucky bastard. You’re getting the early wedding you want and then a kid as a bonus.”
He kisses me again. “Think it’ll be a girl?”
I laugh a little. “You want a girl?”
“Yeah,” he smirks. “We have enough boys in this family.”
Suddenly, nothing else matters. My parents, the stress of planning a wedding, the fact that Justin is stepping down. None of that is important anymore. The baby is everything now. It’s going to change us, the relationship we’ve built, and the way we love each other.
But I know it’s going to be for the better.
I’m ready.
Author's Chapter Notes:
So I think I lied. I was going to do the cliche thing and end the story in a few chapters, because I thought most people would think the story was too long, but you know...I want to write more because I love Justin and Abbey. I don't think there will be A TON of chapters, but a few more than i thought there would be. I hope you guys enjoy what I've come up with :)
Story Tags: triangles justinandtrace executivej
